#and I don’t mean to sound conceited or anything | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

smuttyaf · 2 months

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The Ultimatum

𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰; 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐜𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩.

wc; 14.2k | fifth part to the business

i can’t express how much i appreciate the love i’ve been getting from the series! so because of that, i decided to combine two parts together for this post (teehee) that means extra manipulative!h & extra smut. i hope you all enjoy!

tw: gaslighting, coercion, degradation, tad bit of edging, and bdsm. don’t read if it makes you uncomfy!!

Is it conceited for you to embrace the stares that wander over your appearance?

Men fit in muted suits and twinkling time pieces, letting their adventurous eyes drink in every stride of you entering the lively scenery. Cleavage bouncing with each step held by the floral stitched dress gracing your body in all the right places; slit down one side to reveal your smooth legs and expensive heels.

The warmth of Harry’s hand nestled along your waist has greedy eyes stab jealous daggers with each passing movement in the room. You can’t help the smirk that tugs along your lips. Even if all these men's eyes are set on you, Harry is the one who loves your look the most just as much as you love all his strategic ways.

The familiar scent of his cologne relaxes every nerve from being around his magnetic presence. He moves through the room with grace, head bowing every few moments acknowledging acquaintances and colleagues. Every stretch of skin over Harry drips class and elegance, from his styled curls to Saint Laurent suit, all you can do is admire him.

He clears his throat to draw your attention to him, peeling your chair open with eyes twinkling as you take your seat and let him position you better along the table.

Your gaze surveys the group of men before you, stern faces with loose smirks, it has knots tightening in your stomach. Harry's body rumbles next to you, turning your focus to him with a timid smile, your shy expression has his eye dropping into a wink, hands clasping together looking towards the men.

“Finally! He shows up!”

The circle breaks into laughter, you join in faintly at the sound. There’s a dealer set in the middle of the table continuing to shuffle the deck while distant chatter still fills your ears. Shoulders relax against the cushions of the stool, fingers curving over your pouch as your tongue runs along your bottom lip.

“C’mon, you know this city and it’s shit traffic,” Harry counters, fixing his cuff links while his feet rustle against the chair legs.

“If that’s what you want to call it.” Sneaky grin shining from the man parallel to you who stares at Harry.

The undertone of his comment sends blood to course furiously, cheeks beginning to warm as you sit up straighter in your chair, eyes trailing to the poker chips littering the table in different colours. It distracts the sound of Harry kissing his teeth with his hands drumming against the cushions of the decorative spread.

“Enough, are we playing or what?” He avoids, eyebrows peering up at the ginger employee shuffling the deck of cards.

“I’ll go for another round, how bout’ you Gio?” Bald man with tattoos all over his scalp looks towards the man at the end of the table.

He shrugs in return, his hand raising up for a waitress to trail towards the group. A bouncy brunette appears as Gio looks around the table.

“Marcallan for the men… and you darling, what would you like?” Nervous smile spreads on your lips from being addressed. Finger reaching behind your ear to tuck hair away, sight flicking between Harry and his friend.

“Anything from the Château line, please.” Smiling at him and the waitress, Gio runs his tongue over his teeth as he nods his head.

“And that wine for the lady, thank you dear.” Hand going into his breast pocket, pulling bills out and gracing it to her.

Your eyes turn back towards Harry, he nods his head towards Gio, appreciation caught in their gaze before they’re looking towards cards flying across the table for their own deck.

“I’m feeling lucky tonight,” Harry cracks, arms slinging along the spread with a charming smile looking over his group of friends.

“I wouldn’t speak so soon,” Slim man with long nose twirls his empty glass of ice cubes, cheery grin spread along his features.

“Yeah, so far Johnny is leading this,” Deep voice of the pudgy man next to Harry laughs. It barks in grunting breaths with his face going red. Your view on your boyfriend whose expression reads disdain.

The snicker next to you breaks your attention. Short black hair gelled with hazel eyes dancing in the light, his smirk is sinister being satisfied with his winning streak. Gaze catches with yours, looking over your features with his tongue peeking out and running across his lip. The exchange stirs your sight to Harry, nails curling into the leather of your bag swallowing heavily.

You didn’t know what to expect when Harry invited you to this fundraiser for the evening, but this definitely wasn’t it.

Italian accents and expensive apparel hold your vision when you look around the table. Whether silver and gold shine off their bodies, every peek of their appearance radiates money. All men are groomed and styled with sophistication that adds to the ambiance of the room.

Voluminous jewels hang off the chandelier, waiters walk around holding trays of food or flutes of champagne, guests roaming amongst the floor carrying the flow of the party. The scene is one of glitz and glamor; sparkling liquor, upbeat band, and everyone dressed to the nines.

It’s a beautiful sight of the finer things in life, women flashing their magnificent accessories while men flaunt their luxurious suits and polished dress shoes. A breathless sigh slips past your lips with spine flexing recognizing people from local television.

Despite working at Jasper’s and always encountering famous men, you never got used to them being in your presence. Even if it was dancing for them, the fact you either grew up watching them on the big screen or just reading about them in the weekly news, it still surprises you how you’re able to surround yourself with popular figures.

“Gonna introduce us to your friend here?” Voice beside yourself questions. It rings your ears as your focus remains on the green table.

“Right? Styles, where are your manners?” Teasing tone adding into the space. The attention being on you stirs your heart to pick up in pace, shaky fingers and fluttering lashes look back up at the group.

“This is Y/N, my girlfriend,” Harry's hand finds itself on your naked thigh, sight looking over your timid frame as he smoothes it down the expanse while all the men study your appearance. “So don’t stare too long.”

The night unfolds with drinks flowing and locker room chatter, nasty jokes with suggestive winks leave the poker table a roaring mess. Amused hands clapping at men winning more money or spilling humor. Your once darting eyes and racing heart calms down, acknowledging every word spoken and laughing at every dirty pun. It’s relieving how funny and easy-going the group of his friends are, they carry you into conversations and even get you to join the game.

With the alcohol running through your system it has the hours spent at the party go by in a breeze. Harry’s touch nestles itself by your side, view checking on you enjoying yourself. His reassuring touch and attentive demeanor increases the affection between you, it has you smiling at him genuinely throughout the party appreciating him.

But beside those nurturing moments, you learn in the hours spent over colourful chips and liquor more about the men Harry involves himself with. What you grasp from their innuendos are gruesome jokes about beating someone to the bone or how pleasing it is to see their oppositions dead. Your heart swells with sadness, not only that they find it funny but that Harry was laughing along. It wasn’t amusing to you as it was to him.

That would be the moment you drown out the truth and toss back the rest of your wine, and by the time the glass touches the coaster Harry orders another, pleased you’re compliant with the conversation. Deflecting gaze and clenching heart wanders amongst the mingling people and jazz band. It’s in your tispy state you notice luring eyes of women set on Harry, drinking him in with all his glory that it sends a surge of jealousy through you. Fingers tighten around his as your sight focuses back on him, glossy eyes and straight teeth shine with ignorance about the brutal truth of the relationship.

By the time you’re on your fourth glass, the group settles into calm crackles of past memories; whether it’s about stumbling upon a glory hole or reminiscing about life back in Italy, it subsides your slow pacing heart from the previous conversation.

“So I’m tired right, I got blood gushing from my head and I just busted my ass four blocks to get to Harry’s. I barge into his place, he’s there with Kenzo and Charlie watching sports, you know how this man is always watching sports right!” You giggle in amusement invested with the story.

“And I tell him; I need your help, I can’t tell you what it is, you can never ask me about it later, and we’re gonna hurt some people, and Harry, completely unfazed as ever goes, whose car are we taking?” The group erupts in laughter, as the man you learn to be Mateo, recounts his story.

Harry laughs with nails scratching against your skin, the view of him soothes yourself with warmth adoring him. Curls in waves combine with his amused laughter, skin folding by his eyes completely entertained with the story. The rowdy laughter carries on until there’s someone patting on his shoulder, salt and pepper roots with thick beard catching your sight.

“Styles! Nice to see you!”

Your jaw immediately tenses, nose wrinkles and cheeks blossom under the lights. Teeth clench down on each other as your heart begins to burn, this certainly wasn’t someone you expected to see tonight. Christian Bale in front of you and shaking Harry’s hand as if…

“Christian!” Harry cheers, going to greet him. At the same time his grip tightens around your knee your fingers trail towards your mouth, teeth nibbling on your nail with nerves raking through.

It’s in your movement that your familiar client catches your eyes, flash of surprise crossing his features before a pleased smile spreads.

“Where are you going? Stay for a game,” Harry chimes, hand gesturing to the poker table. The fact he’s even proposing that causes your fingers to curl into his anxiously.

The gesture is noticeable to him with gaze surveying your nervous appearance, before looking back to Christian who shakes his head.

“No, no, I was just on my way out.” Nodding towards the exit doors. Decline of the offer has Harry bow his head in acknowledgment, straightening up in his chair. “It was nice to see you before our meeting.”

“Likewise, get home safe.” Harry concludes the conversation with a genuine smile.

You’re extremely grateful that he passes up on the offer as he leaves towards the exit. Shallow breaths course through, searching eyes watch with teeth tearing away from acrylic, you draw your hand down and share a passive smile.

If you could wipe the sweat that trickles down your temple as if an sitcom, you would. Your heart never stops its thundering beats, discovering your boyfriend and regular client being friends? Colleagues? Whatever it is, it doesn’t sever the ache that grows in your chest.

“I think we should call it a night too,” Harry wonders, head twisting to look at you with a charming smile. “How does that sound?”

With the amount of liquor in your system and having witness that scene before you, the need to feel your blankets and its comforting material is one you pleasantly desire. The ends of your lips twist upwards as you nod.

So, a few minutes after Harry orders the valet for his Porsche you both bid the group farewells. Each man stands shaking Harry’s hand while they bring you in for a hug, respectable actions that leave you fond of the gesture.

The drive back to his penthouse is small talk about how the night went and if you enjoyed yourself. In the quiet space, your sight is caught on the moving buildings passing by in blurs, mind stuck on Mr. Bale while your voice conceals the uneasiness coursing through.

Christian has been your client for two years now, you see him every other week if he’s not on vacation or filming. Despite him being your regular, there is a cordial connection between you both; times he will confess to you problems in his life after too many drinks, or respecting your decision to not push the boundaries of your work position. Even though there’s a non-disclosure agreement binding the both of you, should you tell Harry your relationship with him?

The thoughts brewing are ones that have your back ruffling against the leather seats. How many of your other clients are connected to Harry? You’re so dizzy from the alcohol in your system, you can’t recall if you glazed over any at the party. But it doesn’t even matter in the end, you’re in distress regardless, the possibility of your clients having connections with him but don’t know who you belong to as they watch you dance. A shiver of guilt courses through.

By the time you get home, Harry and you undress and slip between the arms of each other, and by the time he’s completely wrapped up in you, you forget the man that races your mind. In the morning, Harry is already out the door leaving you to wander around his penthouse all afternoon before heading to your own home, caring for Cleo until it’s time to get ready for work.

Your week goes back to what it regularly is; upkeep of your appearance, different decorative robe, and withering under Harry’s touch. It completely slips your mind about your encounter with Christian, going about your life smiling at the postman from another bouquet or spending your time lodging around Harry’s living room until he gets home.

It’s another one of those days, legs crossed over each other with a magazine in your lap. Eyes drifting over the newest pieces in the Fendi collection while The Real Housewives drags along in the background. The chime of the elevator rings in the space notifying you of Harry’s arrival.

His dress shoes echo heavily amongst the polish floor as they cross the room, the severe sound of his paste has your head trialing up from the glossy booklet.

“Hi baby,” Cheerful voice greeting him, your eyes watch him make his way towards the bar.

Harry decides to ignore you with lips flat and jaw tensing. It’s when seeing the sight of him that you swallow heavily, and when glasses smash against the counter top it makes sweat begin to crease in your palms.

“Is everything okay?” Are your next words, nails curling into the shiny paper as you continue to watch him. He walks across the room, same hash footsteps that halt with his body sitting next to you.

Teeth bite down into your bottom lip as you continue to roam over Harry’s features, it reeks pure anger. Your heart pounding in your chest with toes curling in on themselves trying to control the stress overtaking you.

Maybe it’s another bad day at work? Maybe Johnny pissed him off like he always does? Maybe his anger isn’t directed towards you? So, with that glimmer of thought, your hand stretches out to place the magazine on his lap. Nervous smile peeking through as you look towards him.

“Isn’t this coat beautiful, I wonder if they have it in store?” You suggest, gaze catching between his forest eyes and the brown fur coat embroidered with the Fendi logo.

Harry looks towards the magazine, sight roaming over the image before his hand is closing the book and slapping it onto the center table. The ringing of the glass rattles every vein pulsing through. His actions focus your attention with tears beginning to swell.

He stares at the flowers adorning the surface, hand raising the glass to his lips as he swallows back whisky. The tension in the room is thick and uncomfortable, the expression written over his face is one you’ve never witnessed before. It’s why your nails curl into your pantyhose already leaving faint tears.

Harry clears his throat when pulling the drink away from his lips, tongue peeking out to wet flesh just as his eyes lock with you. Connection holding an eerie exchange that has your mouth run dry.

“You know when you joined me for the party Sunday night, I wondered what made you so flustered when Christrian introduced himself.” The mention of your client has your throat squeeze, tears now stinging your vision.

“Still, I thought nothing of it. He has his fame with his movies, his starlight, whatever… you see I thought that was the reason but no, no, no, that wasn’t why you got flustered, now is it?” Your chest now rises quickly with each breath.

Harry’s mad, screw that, mad is not even the word; he’s vexed, furious, absolutely outraged with eyes wide and each word coming out in an angry spew. The sight is haunting compared to the one you’re so use to.

“Since you don’t know, Christian and I are invested in the same stock, sometimes we have meetings going over bullshit graphs and other stupidness to fund. And when I thought that our usual meetings would go how they normally do, I was surprised when he brought you up.” Your skin is practically radiating more heat than the sun at the moment, you’re caught and sit in front of him in complete shock. “Asking me how I could’ve possibly been able to spend a night with you, how he’s been trying to… well, I don’t even want to say.”

“Harry I’m so sorry—”

“—Oh! So now you’re sorry, not when he smiled in my face and shook my hand?”

You’re the reason why he’s enraged and looking at you with such shame. A storm of tears pounds behind your eyes with nails now ruining your stockings, it was taking everything in you not to cry in front of him.

“Harry, I can’t say anything, I’m under contract.”

Those words have a bitter laugh floating in the air, condescending and threatening that your gaze falls towards the leather cushions. The ice cubes in his glass rattle against each other straining the atmosphere.

“Choose right now, your job or me.” Eyes go wide as they look back up at him. Your mouth wobbles as you swallow nervously.

“What?” Brows push together as your fingers unclench themselves around your knees.

“Right now, choose.” Heart pounds against your chest with thunder, tears begging to fall over your waterline as you look at him in surprise at the ultimatum.

All Harry does is stare back with his intense gaze and clenching hand. The emotions coursing through nearly make you faint, this was all too much, especially right now.

“B —Baby, Harry, I think we should just talk about this,”

“—That’s your answer.” Cutting you off with eyebrows high in question. Once again, your expression wavers with confusion and sadness. Mind still trying to process the events happening.

Your stuttering face has Harry pulling away from your presence with another amused laugh, hand slamming his glass down on the table before he’s leaning forward. The clattering objects make your body shake and tears begin to trickle from your eyes, fingers leave your legs to wipe away the sadness roaming down your cheeks.

You watch Harry begin to loosen his tie, knees raising him off the couch as he moves across the room again. His motions have you immediately following after, heels clicking behind his rushed steps trying to catch up to him.

“Get all your shit and get out!” Harry sneers, stomping up the stairs with yourself following behind in anxious beats.

His words have your heart tearing in half, cry leaving your lips as you try to ignore the water blurring your version and trailing down your skin.

“What? No!” Grabbing at Harry’s hand once reaching the landing, the gesture has his fingers jerk away from yours and continue his venture towards the bedroom.

Marching down the hall until swinging the door open, immediately going to your side of the dresser and beginning to toss your shirts and blouses across the floor, some trailing onto the bed as he empties your things.

“Stop! What are you doing!” You sob, bending to pick up the clothing and trying to shove them back in its place.

“You want to stay at Jasper’s! Fine, go ahead! But I won’t be with you anymore!” His voice booms over you, stinging words cutting deep that has another wave of tears shredding.

“I never said that!” You weep, hands trying to collect his who continues to throw your things. Actions so rushed and furious that he’s not even paying attention to your crying frame.

“It’s clear!” Harry tugs another drawer open tossing all your garments across the room.

“Well I’m not going!” Fingers catching onto the fabric in his hands that leave you both fighting over the piece.

“I don’t want you here! Get out!” Harry's voice roars over the sob that leaves your distraught frame.

You never heard Harry this way, and you’ve never seen him this angry either, and the fact he’s throwing you away as if nothing is leaving you completely broken. Every moment with him has been special since you met, and now the fucked up reveal of your secrets is shattering all that you once were. It’s stomping on your heart and playing in the smashed pieces.

You’re sure the eyeliner and mascara you put on this morning is running all over your cheeks, still your chest heaves heavy breaths as your hands trail up his arms to try and halt his movements. This is not what you want, this is the last thing you expected to happen, and it’s more devastating that it’s unfolding like this.

“H —Harry, please, just stop, you can’t mean this.” Soft voice wavering as you tug on his blazer, nails digging into his skin roughly to get attention.

And it does, his sight cold and jaw clenching from the view of your appearance. The draw down your frame looks as if he’s ashamed, like he doesn’t even want to look at you right now. It’s the sight that makes you want to apologize over and over again.

“How is she in bed? Is she as sweet as I imagine?”

Crack lips part, lashes fluttering with brows drawing together; all your features resemble pure shock at the reiteration of Christian’s words. Now you stand in this room that once held such love and affection be swallowed by heartbreak. Chanel, Prada, Armani, gifts that Harry presented for your own space in his life; they now grace the floor as if a memory long forgotten.

“She always told me she never does those things, kinda’ offended she didn’t reveal to me her added profession.”

Olive eyes shine with distaste looking at your withering appearance. Jaw tensing and fingers still clenching around your shirt. Another shaky breath courses through, examining eyes and twitching mouth not knowing what to say.

“You don’t know how badly I wanted to beat the livin’ shit out of him. The way he describes you, talks about you. I had to bite my tongue hearing everything.” Nails relax against his arms with your lips pressing tightly together. “I’m disgusted.”

His words aim to bruise, leaving sadness to blossom in the hollows of your heart. Everything is falling apart right in front of your eyes and all you can do is let tears continue to run. Why didn’t you tell him? Why didn’t you say something?

“So choose, Jasper’s or me.”

“You.”

Nodding up at him, the ends of your mouth tug into a timid smile with your hands drawing down to cradle his fingers. His nostrils flare still angry, still completely furious.

The answer doesn’t ease the tension in the room, instead it heightens your decision, the one you should’ve said before fumbling over your words. Shining rays of light pass through the window, brightness gracing over the clothes flung across the space amidst the battlefield of sadness and rage.

“I —I choose you, I’ll leave Jasper’s, I —I’m sorry.” Fingers encasing around his as you step deeper into his presence. Harry retreats into the dresser, chest flexing with grip contracting around the shirt in hand.

Cold eyes don’t break sight over your sniffling appearance. Intimidation radiates from his towering posture that cradles your worried frame. Even fully clothed, Harry eyes undress every vulnerable twitch that courses through, lashes batting up at him heartbroken and needy, always so needy.

“You quit tomorrow.” He demands, hands dropping the garment and gripping the underside of your arm. “You’ll move out of your apartment, stay with me and be my good little doll. Is that clear?” Now it’s your turn for your body to tense. Tear stained cheeks and paint smeared eyes bow under Harry’s gaze.

“Now I don’t want this happening again. I shouldn’t have to do this to show you what you really want.”

His grip over your arm has you stumbling backwards towards the bed, knees cushioning your seated position as Harry’s other hand goes towards your neck, holding your gaze as he looks over you.

The room captures two lovers; one manipulative with his calculating actions, while the other is victim to the love prayed over with affection and money. His behavior is overseen by your emotions so easily embraced by him. It’s why you stare at him in virtue despite everything that has transpired in your life already, the one that’s now completely devoted to Harry.

“I hate to make you cry… but you look so pretty.”

Thumb spreads over your skin as his head cranes down, lips gazing over each other as his eyes continue to examine your hesitant frame. He loves the way your breath quivers as he moves closer, body shifting against his grip as he looms over your frame in complete awe of you.

“It’s gonna be okay, baby. You know I’ll take care of you, I always do… and with Jasper’s, that place holds you back, you know that, don’t you?” Fingers shaking your head playfully with his sight still never trailing off your bitten lip and doe eyes. “You’ll love it here, keep my bed nice and warm. Won’t you, darling?”

“Yes.”

Though agreeing with everything Harry says, the feeling of your heart trying to repair itself cracks even more at the obligations being set in place. Restrictions now apply over your life to be with him. It’s scary, and alarming, and you should really catch your breath and think over everything he’s saying but you don’t, not with his hand cradling your skin and eyes drawing you in.

“No more dancing, no more clients, just me.”

Nodding your head again with deep breath releasing, your fingers curl around the material of your velvet dress. Heart paces with sorrow realizing you won’t be wrapped up in your long tulle robe, receive generous tips, or have your girl talk surrounded by vanity lights.

“If I find out about another one I’ll kill them. Swear to god I will.” Chest quivers as his words float along your face. Intense stare watching the way you swallow heavily and bow your head at him.

“I’m sorry.” Soft voice slipping past your lips as the storm behind your eyes calms down. Fingers that once ruffled against your dress rise up and close around his wrist, lashes batting up at him with a shaky smile.

“Only you, it’s only ever been you.”

Harry tightens his grip around your jaw. Sight still surveying your anxious frame, his other hand runs down your face before tucking hair away. The ends of his lips tug up at the same time he’s shaking your head playfully, again.

Just like always, his demeanor radiates satisfaction at your attention. Heart growing fond of you surrendering yourself, complying to every requirement. Harry falls more in love with the way he can control you, how you’re now his entirely. He’s happy knowing that he’ll come home to your pretty self waiting for him and ready for anything he proposes, all because you’re just that dedicated to please him.

It’s why his head lowers, lips connecting against your bitten ones. The grip over your jaw sliding down your neck, rubbing the skin roughly as tongues link together to dance. Ignorance of the heated scene passing over both of your minds while his hand tightens.

The bourbon on his tongue adds to the intoxicating sensation that runs through you whenever you taste him. It’s the type that you want passing through your own veins just loving it that much, loving him that much. Harry cares about you, isn’t it obvious? He wants what’s best for you, that’s why he’s making you leave Jasper’s and have you live with him to spend the rest of your days.

His hand curls around your neck, mouths parting as his sight goes back to examining your face. There’s still pink roaming across the hollows of your eyes, cheeks a mess of black liner, and daze still twinkling up at him.

“Show me how sorry you are.”

Darting sight looks between his smirk and preying self, knees pushing off the bed to fall to the floor with connection never breaking. His hands follow every motion of your head as it nods at him, your fingers going to his belt and immediately beginning to undo it.

Thick bulge pressed tightly against his zipper revealing how turned on he got at the heated exchange. Your hand releases him from his boxers while your other tugs the rest of his slacks down, mouth not waiting to accept him graciously. Shallow taste of salt on your tongue as it twirls around his head, eyes blinking up as you apologize in his favorite way.

Lips bubble with spit as you roam down his length, clear fluid coating him in the rush of your descent, the urgent need to display how sorry you are shows.

Your mouth parts lowering yourself around him, tongue laying flat along the underside craving out every pulsing vein beneath erect skin. The warmth of you wrapping around his cock has a relieving sigh pass through him.

“Be my perfect girl.” Fingers massaging your scalp as you continue to swallow him down. “Show me how sorry you are.”

Harry watches every bob of your head, plump lips sucking him and feeling your throat relax and accept him effortlessly. Connection shimmers with obedience as you prove to him how guilty you feel for thinking you wouldn’t choose him over anything.

Acknowledging his comments your mouth descends down his cock even further, neck contracting around his length as your nose tickles his pelvis, moan stifles against him at the way he stretches your throat. The effect of him between your lips already has your pussy throbbing, wetness beginning to coat your folds falling into his every tactic.

The hand placed on his thigh moves towards his dick, enclosing around it and gliding with every bob of your head, added pleasure being received happily as his fingers curl into your locks.

“Just like that,” Harry coos, hips thrusting into your motions as you continue swallowing him down.

Shivers of delight course through happy you’re pleasing him. It’s reassuring hearing his groan over your movements. Knees shuffling across the floor, strands of hair shifting with every dip and saliva causing his cock to glisten in the light.

It’s beautiful how it shines, mini air bubbles roaming along the nerves pulsating along your tongue. It was a sight to see, a sight you adore. It’s why your body tries to contain yourself from the sparks igniting. You’re happy to apologize to him, happy to show him that he’s the only one for you.

The expressions of pleasure slipping from Harry uplifts your spirit, you’re back on his good side, and you want to remain there. The look of disgust that once crossed his face is one you never want to see again, especially his words. You’re supposed to be his good doll, not one to lie or deceive him. That’s why you’re on your best behavior, doing anything to prove yourself.

“I’ll do anything to show you that you’re the only one I want.” Fingers tightening around his length that has him groaning from the look over your face, eyes caught on your forgiving frame that he can’t help but smirk. Palms now hold your face up in his favorite place. “You always treat me so good, I’m sorry baby.”

Hand continues to roam down his cock in twists, easily sliding with spit as your gaze doesn’t break. Needy eyes and pouty lips, it’s Harry's favorite image of you; and with your makeup all streaked down your cheeks, he wants this moment to be photographed so he can save it in his wallet to show how devoted you are to pleasing him.

His grip over you halts your movements, fingers roughly carrying your face towards him as your knees flex with gasp falling from your lips, his actions have your hands contract and draw away.

“Show me.”

The words guide your movements to reach behind your back. Nails catching on your zipper to draw it down your frame. Fitted dress falling down your body as your heels are next, toes slipping out of your pumps and touching the heated wood, and with each movement of you shredding off your panties and stockings, Harry is there watching your every move while he strokes himself.

The soft skin of your curves sit on display for him to admire. Swelling breasts so perfect and round, thighs so deliciously smooth and begging to be in his hold. God, Harry is in love with you. Every vulnerable inch of yourself is exposed for his greedy eyes. It’s why he begins undressing himself; dress shoes kicking off, slacks joining the mess on the floor, and every button of his dress shirt revealing inked skin under your gaze.

“Turn around.”

Following his command, you do. Eyes staring at all your clothes thrown over the space, nails drawing down your thighs eagerly as you hear ruffling behind you.

“Get on the bed, face down.”

Legs bend, knees ruffling against the sheets while your spine curves in. The side of your face is comforted by your slick blouse as your hands reach out in front of you, fingers curling around loose garments with your pussy set on display.

Harry’s steps shift amongst the floor, palm sliding to your lower back shoving you deeper into the bed as the head of his cock drags down your creamy folds.

“Look so pretty like this baby.” Dick pushing past your lips and spreading you wide. Your mouth hangs open, a satisfied moan trailing into the air of Harry stretching you out with all his length. “I love when you tell me you’re sorry.”

Whimpers spill, head rotating in pleasure as your hips jerk with each pound of his. Harry draws out slowly before thrusting back in roughly, each strike filling your pussy just the way you like. It never mattered what position you found yourselves in, he was always reaching parts of you that had your toes curling, and the fact that he’s pounding away not even allowing you to adjust sends a greedy sensation through you.

Harry is using your pussy just the way you like; fucking you however he pleases like the doll you are to him. It’s exhilarating, it’s mind numbing, leaving you light headed and addicted to every strike opening you wide.

“That’s right… take my dick.” Deafening slap roaming against your ass. It has your teeth biting into the silk and push against his thrusts with adrenaline coursing through.

“Baby,” Nails curling tightly into your shirts, while his grip over your hips controls you to accept every hungry pound.

Harry surveys your jolting frame, flexing back and shoulders craning as your arms roam higher up the sheets. Fingers drag and curl around the piles of mess lying across the sheets, plump lips hanging open in adoration at his urgent thrusts.

You look so beautiful like this, are his immediate thoughts floating in his mind; the way you grant him pleasure within the depths of your body that he loves to sink into, so beautiful.

Every delicious sound of your voice crying out in a whimper or moan just drives his hips even more, hands slipping up your neck and shoving your head into the blouse, hungry growl leaving him as your eyes squeeze shut with your pussy quivering around him. God does he love you so much, don’t you see that? Don’t you feel it? With every rock of his hips don’t you feel the electric pulse of him, how he’s so hungry craving more of your sweetness.

It’s the smirk that carries across his lips with knowledge that you know, you have to. Because with every coat of your nectar sliding down and accepting his cock he can feel your walls tighten and release; skin folding between your brows, knuckles going white from your grip over the sheets, pussy accepting every assault that you admire so much. Yes, he’s sure you know.

“Tell me you’re sorry.” He demands, chest parallel to your shoulders as he mounts you into the bed.

Harry’s hips have your body bouncing into the springs, face squishing and wheezing sighs of air passing through the thin material of your top. He’s so intoxicating the way he fucks you into the bed and shows you were you belong.

“I’m sorry!” Moaning while your fingers drag down the bed in agony at the ticks of your climax crawling through your foot.

“I’m so, so, sorry,” Voice going hoarse as your thighs quiver, eyes fluttering open to see lace and silk engulf your vision.

“Mhm, don’t you want to be my good girl?” Thrusts never halting as he continues to pound away at your cervix.

“Yes, god, yes!” Head straining against his hold as your stomach clenches with nerves.

Harry continues going, erratic thrusts of his cock in your drenched pussy, the sound of his hips plummeting your backside meets with every groan and whimper trailing in the air. The sounds drawing from the room float all the way into the hallway, each other's appetite being fulfilled in the messy foundation of your relationship.

“That’s my perfect girl,” Harry hums, lips pressing into your bobbing head as you completely unravel around him.

Hypnotic pulses sting down your spine as your head twists in his hold, teeth bite into the sheets as your pussy quivers all around him. Chest heaves as your mind goes completely blank, every thought and emotion is wrapped in him, loving everything he does.

“Oh my god, Harry,” Whining while you go sore around him as he continues his torment.

“That’s it baby… I feel you.” He breathes into your ear, hand releasing around your neck, the hold of you around his cock adds to him moaning into your sweating skin. “So good for me, just the way I like.”

Hips slowly dive back in, motions changing from their rough propelling paste to affectionate loving strokes. So exhilarating and passionate as he feels your body go limp around him.

It’s in the way your mouth parts, salvia stringing between your plump lips that Harry groans heavily against you. The mess of your hair mattes against his, the smell of your shampoo filling his nose as your back ruffles against his chest. Ticking sensations coursing through still leaving you feeling drowsy with your climax consuming you.

The dazed expression crossing your face is a captivating site, one that has Harry spilling into you, long moan brushing over your face as he relaxes into your body. Two hearts in the same room trying to regulate their breathing as they come down from the adrenaline that once pierced you into the sheets.

You feel Harry go slack, cock slipping out as he rolls off your body. You still breathe in shaky breaths, waist falling into the mattress as your thighs ruffle against the garments with limbs twitching from the waves of your release still coursing through.

As your mind continues to wander itself through fog you don't realize Harry sitting up in bed and putting himself back together, feet shuffling across the floor as he walks around the bed frame.

The noise catches your attention first before the sight of him entering the bathroom, and even despite him just fucking you brutally into the sheets he still looks upset.

“Clean up this mess and get ready for dinner, reservation is for seven.” Is all he says, the bathroom door slamming shut ending further conversation, only meaning that your apology isn’t accepted.

For thirty minutes you sit across from each other and let silence eat you up. Nails picking the skin around your cuticles, teeth biting into flesh while Harry on the other hand is extremely relaxed. Poised, professional, and avoiding your presence as if you’re not even there.

It’s over dinner that you realize, no matter how many times you try to shine your pearly white teeth or strike up a conversation, if Harry is in a bad mood that means you suffer in the projection of his feelings.

You can’t even be surprised by his anger, it’s really what you expect. You lied for days just for him to find out from Christian himself, and to make it even worse, he talked about you in a way that even made your skin crawl.

Harry avoided you for the rest of the night; no eye contact, no kisses, and no cuddling once in bed. It sinks your soul knowing you’re the reason behind the way he’s treating you at the moment, but it’s only right you endure this. It’s your fault.

That’s why you aren’t surprised when you wake up to the text from him reminding you of what’s needed today. The one thing you never thought would happen so soon. No more decorative feathers, no more giggling and suggestive talks, no more tips and dancing, no more Jasper. Three years gone, the memories you have are ones you hold dear; it’s why it pains you right now.

Looking at yourself in the goblet mirror adoring the dresser, that was previously pulled apart in a furious rage, tears prick your eyes recalling all the fond moments. Girls helping out with makeup, advice on which robe to wear, gossiping about clients, god, you’ll miss it all. But, it’s better this way. It’s better to have Harry take care of you, it’s nice really. You don’t have to worry about other men touching you, or whispering what they would like to do if given the chance. Sure, the money was nice and all but, Harry gives you anything you ask for, so maybe it isn’t that bad. Maybe, it’ll be okay.

“Miss, the car is ready for you.” Knock at the door awakening you from your thoughts. You inhale sharply, fingers running through your hair nervously as you nod at yourself.

“Okay, I’ll be right down!” You call, back turning and grabbing your coat.

The drive to Jasper’s is quiet, the streets outside the truck don’t puncture the memories that you reminisce about. Working your ass off at such a young age from waitressing to odd jobs, Jasper’s was a breath of fresh air despite the downside of dancing and late nights, you began to live a life of luxury, the life you always dreamed about. You did it by yourself, on your own and you’re proud about that. You could’ve given up at any moment but instead you pulled through, and now look, you found someone who’s going to take care of you.

Despite the tension between you and Harry at the moment, it’s obvious he wants to keep you by his side, should you really object to that? You spend the majority of your time with him, he always takes you out to dinner, buys whatever you want, and shows you love whenever needed (disregarding the current circumstance) so it really isn’t like his suggestions aren’t true. You’ll be better off with Harry, you know deep down this slippery slope that it will get better, and once you move in it’ll be easier just to please him. It’ll be okay. Everything will be okay.

Once Harry's team helps you out of the truck and to your familiar destination the surge of anxiety scorches through. Heart beating erratically, fingers fidgeting in your coat, eyes move in every direction as you tug your way to his office. It pains you to be in this situation, and you would do everything to not stand here right now facing the same door that welcomed you with open arms but now it’s too late.

Your palm curls around the golden knob and an uneasy smile tugs at your lips, seeing Jasper’s low eyes and ruffled hair. It only brings back so many memories, ones that you’ll remember forever.

“Y/N! My sweetheart!” Jasper stands, walking around the desk and opening up his arms.

You immediately go towards him. Hands wrapping around his back and ingesting the smell of coffee and cigarettes. Weirdly it calmed you down, settling the uneasiness through you as you lay against his chest.

The first time you ever met Jasper there was always a loving connection between you both, as if father and daughter. Southern accent and tired look never giving off irritation or displeasure whenever around. Always treating everyone with such kindness and respect, he never changed since you first met him, and that’s what you like most about him. Jasper is Jasper.

“My dear girl, it feels like forever since I last saw you,” Pulling away he smiles, crooked teeth and chapped lips shining as you bow your head in acknowledgment.

“I know, I know, I’ve been really busy lately.” You confide, eyes darting between him and the birds that roam outside the window.

Jasper sighs looking over your frame before stepping back. His hand gestures to the chairs seated in front of the desk. You immediately oblige, legs crossing over each other with hands curling together in your lap. Now you wish you could nestle in his chest just like a few seconds ago, burrow yourself into the coffee smell and forget the reason why you’re in this office.

“Yes, I see, you've been taking your vacation days quite often.” The words only elect an anxious draw of breath. Now your palms begin to grow with sweat, and you swear your ears start to ring from your mind racing.

“Yes, sir. I just thought… I —I… um,” Stuttering not knowing what to say or where to direct your attention. Your heart is going crazy in your chest, pounding so hard against its cage that you might pass out. “I found someone.”

You basically whisper those words but Jasper, he hears and he smiles. It’s one that knows the secret without having to hear the reveal. You’re sure it is written all over your face, and with the grin that tugs across his lips, you calm down just a bit.

“Is it Styles?” You blink with mouth parted and pain quaking throughout your bones.

“Y/N…” He sighs, hand brushing through his messy hair as he leans back in his chair. “I looked through your client log, I’ve seen Styles was your regular for about two months or so until he stopped returning; in that same time you begin using your vacation days. It quirked my interest so I decided to go through the security cameras during that time frame and…”

Your whole entire body goes hot, ears burning, and stomach turning, quite frankly you want to throw up. You’re stupid to forget about the hidden cameras in the room. God, of course this happens to you. Of course your boss saw you in every imaginable way within the two months Harry spent still coming here. You want to curl into a ball and forget this even happened.

“Dear…” Jasper breathes again, concerned look written all over his face despite your raging appearance. “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Those are in there to protect everyone, and we’re humans, it’s natural, so don’t think too much about it, alright?”

You nod your head timidly as your leg begins to bob, you drop your head and try your best to not let tears run down your cheeks. You already went through a crying fit yesterday and you’re not going through another one again.

“You already know my thoughts on you Y/N. You’ve been my star since you walked into this place. I just want you to be safe.” Chin tilting your version to look back up at the concerned boss who was like a father to you. This couldn’t get any worse. Having to leave everything you know behind, this absolutely sucks.

“I know Styles… I know the life he lives isn’t the best and it’s definitely not the happiest. I just want you to fully understand what you’re getting yourself into.” Jasper leans forward, hand reaching out for yours which you don’t hesitate to give. You don’t hold back anymore, letting the tears trickle down slowly as you breathe in, throat straining from this moment, the one you still can’t believe is happening.

“I’ll be fine, Jasper. I know I will.” You nod with reassurance, free hand swiping away the tears that still spill. His fingers curl around yours, thumb brushing over your knuckles trying to sooth you but, when that isn’t enough he steps around the desk, body engulfing your shaking frame as you try to regain some composure.

“Grace and I are always here, you know that darling. You don’t gotta worry.” Hand patting your hair as you nod into his stomach, nose sniffing through the space.

“I know…” You sigh. Peeling away from his presence, a small smile on your lips as you look up at him. “This isn’t a goodbye, I promise.”

Jasper nods his head softly, tired expression still lingering as he looks over your frame while he continues to run his hands over your locks. The action soothes you. The storm brewing inside calms itself, the current subsiding and the tears that once roam down your cheeks halt. Your heart quiets down, chest relaxing with head drawing away from him as you wipe away any streaks.

You stand to wrap around him once again, breathing in his usual scent just hoping the clock can turn back time and things can go back to how they once were. Jasper rocks you, letting all the pulsing veins in your body rest and ease your shaking body to a halt.

“I’ll miss you.” You breathe into his chest before looking up at him. The smile you adore shines brightly as he pats your lower back.

“This is home darling, you’ll always know where to find me if needed, alright?” Jasper reassures. Nodding up at him once more, you pull away and offer a genuine grin.

Departing from his touch there’s a sense of loneliness spreading through. Giving up your work and home to live with Harry, in hindsight, there’s nothing wrong with having him take care of you, if anything you should be happy that he’s willing to do that. It shows the love he has for you but, why in this moment does it feel like you’re giving up your life; not on your terms but his.

When closing the chestnut door the walk down the familiar hallway is bittersweet. Intricate designs plastered on every inch of the walls, gold fixtures shining against the dim light before you reach the elevator and ring it back to the main floor.

Every chime is one you cherish no matter how stupid it may seem, the sound is sentimental and will forever be ingrained in your memory from the many nights your tall heels would stand in the moving machine. Your eyes dance around the revolving mirrors and lit up numbers, your fingers tracing over the covers and drinking them in as it will be the last time you’ll probably press them again.

The ding of the elevator thrusts you out of your thoughts and through the doors, it’s to your surprise once leaving that ginger hair and beaming smile greet you. The sweet aroma of her perfume wafts your senses as she pulls you into a hug, fur and strands of hair prickle against your skin as you lean into her touch.

“Hey babe! You’re working with me today?” Grace asks while pulling away, happiness written all over her features.

“Uh… no actually, just had to speak to Jasper,” You say, concealing the truth with an exaggerated eye roll.

“Don’t blame him, I barely see you anymore,” She jabs, hand gently shoving you which leaves you shaking your head in response.

“I’m busy, what can I say?” You shrug raising your hands up playfully to surrender.

“Yeah, busy being under Harry any chance you get,” It’s her turn to roll her eyes and nudge you with her hip. “But, hey! Angelo actually got me a booth tonight at his club, why don’t you and Harry come!” Grace suggests. Hazel eyes and white teeth shine with excitement at her offer.

You’ve never been with him in that sort of setting before, and honestly you don’t know how he’ll be either. But, you both are also not on great terms, so maybe a night out with some drinks and dancing will do you both some good.

“Uh, yeah, that actually sounds fun. I’ll ask him.” You beam with fakeness. “I actually should get going now, the car is waiting for me.”

“Okay! Hope to see you tonight!” Grace grins, pulling you into another hug before going to her destination.

Nodding your head timidly, you watch her orange hair bounce down the hall until her body disappears. A shaky breath escapes as you turn towards the entrance, hands fitting into your pockets as you push the doors open. The brisk air sweeps through as you tug your way towards the truck. Sincere smile spreads as Elio helps you into the vehicle before getting behind the wheel.

“Should I inform Mr. Styles that everything went as expected?” He calls from the front. Your hand tears away from their place and swipes away the lingering strands of hair combing over your face.

“Yes, it went well.” You sigh, eyes looking out the window as the car begins to move. The French pillars trail out of your version, leaving your heart splitting down the middle at the conclusion of your life.

“Actually Elio, can you do me a favor and ask Harry something for me?”

Surprise is an understatement with the fact you're walking through the club with music thumping your ear drums. Harry’s hand is secured tightly amongst your hips while the floor shakes from the erratic beat coursing through. With all the bodies shuffling through the room, you’re happy Harry’s team is pushing people through the mess directing you where to go.

You didn’t think he would agree to coming out tonight, but when he did you couldn’t have been anything but ecstatic. You threw on your tightest dress and curled your hair just the way he likes, also opting to wear the perfume he complimented on how irresistible you smell. Tonight you were going to win him back the way you know how.

“Yay! I’m so happy you came!” Grace screams over the song while pulling you into a hug.

“Oh my god!” Lucy joins, wrapping around you both. The feeling of another body being engulfed in the circle only means it’s Clarissa. The grin on your face spreads wider at the moment, head knocking around until they all pull apart.

“Hot lil’ thing aren’t you,” Clarissa remarks once pulling away. Her hand collects yours to twirl you around and display your appearance, the action only leaves you laughing as you smile at your friends.

“Thank you, thank you,” Rolling your eyes playfully as she releases her hold. The fitted black garment hugs your curves deliciously while your heels accentuate the length of your legs.

“But… everyone meet Harry,” You say, sight darting to him as you let your arm wrap around his waist, head leaning onto his chest as he smiles stiffly at your group of friends.

“Hello!” He nods to each, colourful strobes shine over everyone in the reserved area as all your friends introduce themselves.

“This bottle of Don Julio isn’t gonna finish itself!” Grace screams, picking the lengthy bottle off the table and raising in the air. It makes you giggle before turning to Harry with eyebrows raised.

“Let’s have fun tonight, yeah?” You say, hand running up his stomach before turning towards Grace who's already pouring shots for everyone.

After that, the night is in full swing; neon lights flashing over sweaty bodies, alcohol either being passed around in short glasses or poured into mouths messily, confetti shoots in the air every few moments as music blasts through the speakers.

The atmosphere in the booth is an energetic thrill, everyone getting along by singing and dancing, laughter and cheers filling the air as liquor takes over everyones system and leaves them in a good mood.

It’s in the flashing message board bringing another bottle that you realize how intoxicated you really are. The lights blinking at you seem to shift slowly, the music sounding through the space drowns out in a blur of noise as you stumble your way towards Harry, half empty Patron in your hand as you step in front of him.

“Open please!” You giggle up at him, fingers swinging the drink in hand while wiggling eyebrows.

“I’m good love,” Harry smiles down at you, his fingers finding their place on your hip as you pout at him.

“No! Tell him he needs to loosen up,” Turning your attention to Angelo who laughs at the exchange, shaking his head.

“Oh, come on,” You huff, rolling your eyes yet slipping deeper into Harry’s warmth. If he doesn’t want to take anymore shots then you surely will, you raise the clear bottle to your mouth, lips parting and happily willing to accept the liquor till you feel his hands tear it away from your hold.

“Trust me darling, you don’t need anymore,” Harry points out and passes the bottle to Angelo.

It only has you pouting, you wanted to have fun and you wanted Harry to loosen up some more, but you’ll accept his decision with another eye roll and trailing back over to your friends who are even more drunk than you.

“Bottoms up!” Lucy screams as she pours Clase Azul into your mouth, the amount so much you have to clasp your hand around her wrist to tear the bottle away.

“Ew,” You laugh, after swallowing the sickening amount, leaving Clarissa to chuckle at your reaction. Eyeing Grace across the section, you gesture for you to come towards you.

Happily complying she joins between the three as lights flash across your glistening bodies. The white and blue bottle gets exchanged between your friends, all taking shots before placing it on the table. As the neon strobes continue to flash and confetti fills the air, the DJ yells into the mic something inaudible until the song he puts on has the crowd cheering.

“Ah! Catch me slidin’ in a Benz, I ain’t looking for no man,” Clarissa screams her body turning towards you as her hips begin to sway. You can’t help the laugh that leaves as Lucy turns and grins at you.

“Ain’t recruiting no new friends! Louie bag filled with bands!” Grace is next as she dances behind the blonde, her head swinging seductively as she moves to the beat.

The energy is so ecstatic between the group that you find yourself joining in. Hips swiveling into Clarissa’s as your hands find themselves venturing toward her neck, fingers carding through her hair as you match the rhythm of her. The comfort of her palms trails down your sides, teasingly tugging the bottom of your dress up as you grind against each other.

“Get it, Sexy! Get it, Sexy!” Lucy cheers along with the song, her body leaning over and tapping your thigh as you and Clarissa manage to grind yourself lower towards the floor.

Laughter leaves both of your mouths as you continue circling your hips against each other, your head knocks back against her shoulder as you let the alcohol consume every motion while the song continues to thunder in your ears.

From your dazed out state to blurry vision, the rough grip over your hand tangled in Clarissa’s hair rips itself away as you stumble over your feet, nearly falling, as you’re being pulled out the booth and down the stairs. The movements are so fast you barely even catch yourself tripping down the flight and across the floor.

“Ow, stop,” You whine, feeling the pain in your wrist increase as the sight of Harry’s curly hair tug you through the mountain of bodies.

The crowds of people brush past you in a rough breeze, elbows and drinks hitting your moving body as you continue to be pulled away from the rambunctious scene.

“Harry you’re hurting me!” Yelling over the music as you try to twist around in his hold, still that doesn’t halt his motions as he continues pushing through the crowd.

It’s when cold air hits your skin and fills your nose do you breathe in a sigh of relief. Your hand jerks out of his grip as you look at him completely furious. “What the fuck are you doing!”

Yet, Harry ignores you, his body struts down the sidewalk past people throwing up or walking around slouched over their friends. And, instead of watching him continue to move further down the path you immediately follow, heels clicking against the cement as chatter and car horns fill the street.

“Hello! Can you talk to me please,” Drunkenly calling out for him as you trail behind like a dog, his footsteps rushed and harsh as the familiar black truck comes into view.

“Get in. Now.” Every word is a bite of aggression but in your drunken state you barely pay any mind as he holds the door open and watches your sluggish body climb into the vehicle.

“What’s your problem?” You mumble, back fitting into the leather seat as you watch Harry peel his phone out of his pocket, still ignoring you.

His voice rings through the space only leaving you to direct your attention to look outside the parked vehicle, vision shifting in slow twists that has you groaning. Hand rises to your forehead in frustration that it feels as if the car is spinning even though it’s parked.

The jostle of the truck shifts as the door slams close, your head peels up to see Elio in his familiar place as the car roars awake. The vehicle immediately peeling off, leaving the street lights from outside to flutter in.

“Why are we leaving?” You’re back to slurring over your words as you turn towards Harry, confusion evident in your expression while he looks cold as ever.

“The hell was that?” He hisses, eyes burning holes in your appearance but you can’t even tell from the alcohol shifting your vision, which leaves you giggling at his response.

“What was what?” Laughing faintly as your hands pull down the end of your dress.

“You’re a mess.” Harry scoffs, head shaking as he turns to look out the window.

Even drunk those words struck a cord within you, brows pushing together as you sit up in your chair and cock your head to the side.

“No, I’m not, don’t say that!” Your voice raising as your jaw tenses, the alcohol in your system fueling anger as you look at him distraught.

“Don’t say that? Look at you! Dancing and touching your friends like that, are you serious?!” Harry’s voice is booming over yours but in your state you don’t even care, you let your tone rise higher. The both of you look at each other livid.

“I’m having fun Harry, I’m at the club,” You respond, hands tearing away from your dress and crossing over themselves amongst your chest.

“It shows you have no class! No morals!” He snaps, nose flaring and hand slamming against the window of the truck.

“No class? No morals? Do I need to remind you where we met! Fuck you! You’re so insecure!” You’re shouting, chest rising heavily as your face screws up.

The laugh that leaves Harry is menacing, with his head shaking in disbelief, a cheery smile tugging across his lips. “Insecure?”

“Yes, insecure and jealous! What’s so wrong with me dancing with my friends!” You wouldn’t be surprised if your voices were heard outside of the car, and you actually feel bad for Elio having to hear the exchange of words. “Fuck! You’re making me so mad!”

“How do you think I feel?”

“You’re the one who started this!”

As the usual sight of Harry’s building fixes your version you’re immediately sitting up and tugging your dress down. The truck comes to a halt; you don’t wait for Elio to help you out as you peel your door open and begin making your way towards the entrance. Your ears burn with anger as your nose scrunches up, heels smacking against tiles as you press the elevator button erratically.

“Stop acting like a child,” Harry hisses once meeting your body, his key pressing into the sensor to allow access to the elevator for his penthouse.

“Fuck you,” You utter, eyes still staring ahead as your step into the machine.

Harry waves off Elio, his body retreating next to yours as you both stand in complete silence. Your heart thumps loudly in your chest as your head shakes in pure frustration.

The chime of the elevator dings and your body immediately rushes through the open space of the living room, hair swishing against your neck as you practically speed walk through the room.

“Get over here!” Harry demands, voice rough and loud but you don’t listen, you keep your pace and venture up the stairs.

“Leave me alone!” You call back, his heavy footsteps sounding behind you as you walk down the hall.

“You’re not going out with your friends again!” He shouts following your body as you enter the bedroom.

“Like I’m going to listen to you,” You scoff heading towards the closet until Harry is gripping your waist roughly and turning you towards him.

“You’re running thin with me. Watch your fuckin’ mouth.” Each word a whispered hiss as he looks at you darkly. His hair framing his forehead as his lips press together, jaw tensing and hold growing tighter.

“I can’t stand you. You’re so controlling.” Your only response, as your eyes watch his dilate before his touch is turning you around roughly and pushing you into the mattress abruptly.

“Controlling? I’ll show you controlling.”

Your moving arms are caught in his hold as he tugs them behind your back. His other hand reaches down and pulls your dress over your hips to reveal your backside. Body moving against his hold as your head turns around seeing him in your peripheral vision.

“Harry,” You mutter, his palm roaming over your backside before it’s landing a smack amongst your skin.

He only grunts in response, hands smoothing over your ass before placing another slap. The harsh feeling over your backside has you biting into the sheets with pain and pleasure coursing through, the anger that once filled your body subsides as you fight yourself from moaning against his touch.

“You’ve been such a bad girl lately? What’s gotten into you?” Harry states, another harsh smack reddening your skin as the grip holding your hands together tightens.

Teeth graze the material of the sheets, eyes rolling at the adrenaline coursing through at each slap as your head relaxes into the mattress. Your chest breathes in deeply, fingers curling in on each other as your thighs shake against the bed frame.

“What’s your colour?” Harry demands, another furious strike coursing through your body. Your eyes squeeze shut as you whimper into the sheets.

Instead of answering you just bury your head deeper into the bed, mouth releasing the duvet as you bite back moans dying to trail out.

“Don’t hold out on me baby,” Harry chuckles, so deep and sinister that your spine crawls at the sound. “I know you like this.”

Teasing voice so sexy that your toes clench against each other amongst the pad of your heels, breasts caving deeper into the blanket while your hips jerk up at the deafening sound cracking against your cheeks.

“Fuck,” You cry, teeth biting into your bottom lip as a rush of thrill courses through and has your pussy throbbing.

“What’s your colour?” He asks again, his hand sliding between your cheeks and feeling between your legs to touch your heat.

The feeling of him taunting you by rubbing over your clothes or bruising your skin red is an addicting one, it has you rustling against the sheets praying for more even though you should be fighting these feelings.

“G —Green,” You breathe into the sheets so quietly that it only beckons another rough slap to welcome itself across your skin.

“I’m sorry, I can’t hear you love, speak up louder, what did you say?” Luring tone in his voice only has you groaning at his tantalizing ways.

Another smack meets your cheeks so harshly that your spine shoots up and heels chime against the floor. You’re sure your skin is bruised in different colour hues from the amount of strikes that he applies across your skin; and with the alcohol in your system still pumping through your veins, you can’t help the lengthy moan that slips out.

“Green,” You squeak, head shifting amongst the sheets as the feeling of the grip over your hands relaxes. His palm smooths over your backside once again before diving between and feeling over your covered folds.

“Tell me baby, why do you like making me upset?” Harry asks, fingertips dragging down your pussy with aggression that has you shuddering.

“I don’t,” You sigh, thighs quivering against the bed frame as you fall deeper into his touch.

“That’s what you think? Two days in a row you’ve been giving me problems. I don’t like that.” Fingers slipping between your panties to feel your pussy nearly soaking from the exchange of his actions.

“Harry,” You moan, eyes fluttering when you feel the pads of him grace your clit.

“Huh? What was that?” Hand tearing away from between your legs and roaming back up your scorching skin.

“S —Sir, I’m sorry sir,” Body shivering from his touch roaming up and down your exposed flesh.

“Still not good enough.” Harry’s voice deep and gruff as his hands fit under your tight dress, feeling over your heated skin before he’s tugging it over your head. “Come on darling, I know you can do better than that.”

“I —I’m sorry, Mr. Styles.” Words still slurring from the alcohol in your system to his mesmerizing aura.

“That’s my girl. Now, be a good doll and turn around for me.” The sound of your dress falling to the floor is heard as you turn around under his hold, eyes connecting on his dazzling ones that shine with the moonlight pouring through the window.

“You’re so beautiful, baby,” Harry’s body looming over you as his hands dance up your sides, sliding amongst your clammy skin and feeling over your erect nipples. The touch is so slow and daring that you can’t help but whimper. “I hate when you upset me.”

His fingers grip your round flesh while his eyes skim over every curve and dip; your body flexes along with the shadows in the dark room, fingers feeling against the sheets below as you don’t dare break contact, not with the way he’s looking as if he wants to devour you.

“That’s why right now, you’re my toy. My little toy that’s been so nasty and filthy lately.” Hands drawing back down your sides, sinking past your hips and towards your pussy once again. “So dirty dancing like that on your friends.”

Your teeth bite into your bottom lip, thighs spreading wider accepting his touch while your head buries itself deeper into the mattress. His words only fuel the slick coursing through your pussy.

“You want to be a slut… so, I’ll treat you like one.” Fingers now slip into you only causing a moan to trail out. His lengthy digits thrust into you roughly that have your eyes open wider as he stares longingly at your reaction, smirk tugging at the ends of his lips.

“Play with you however I like… use you just the way I want.” Digits driving out just to plunge back in, the ends of his fingers curling deeply into your pussy that your mouth hangs open in surprise. Harry just started penetrating you and already your stomach was tickling with static.

“Teach you how to be my good little doll, hmm?” Harry continues, brow raising in question as his smile is still sinister from the expression crossing over your face.

As one hand is pleasing your throbbing pussy, the other lands one backhanded slap across your cheek completely surprising you but not enough that it doesn’t stop you from moaning softly and runting your hips against his motions.

“You’re pussy is mine to play with, do you understand?”

Your head bows urgently as you suck in a deep breath, lashes fluttering up at him as his tongue peeks out of his mouth to smooth across his bottom lip.

“Yes, Mr. Styles.”

Pearly white teeth shine at your doe expression continuing the rough thrusts of his fingers. Sweet nectar coating him with each curl that leaves you keening high in your throat.

“It’s mine to use and abuse,” Harry states, suited body covering over you as he examines every twitch in your face consumed with pleasure. “Your pussy belongs to me.”

Every comment is tingling your spine and has your lashes batting up at him so in love. Each word is degrading and brutal, words that should have you distraught but they don’t, they have another moan leaving your mouth as you accept the his urgent stroke of his fingers.

“Fuck, yes, Mr. Styles.” Your own hands curling into the sheets, thighs beginning to shake and head lolling back.

Harry surveys every inch of your skin that twitches and squirms from his hold over you. He admires watching your stomach quiver, and the way your pussy pulses in his palm has the erection in his pants press painfully against the zipper.

“Mhmm… I like how things are turning around now.” He smiles, digits leaving you to rub your slick all along your folds, spreading you wide as your thighs contract around him.

A whimper falls from your bitten lips as the warmth of Harry leaves. His hands go to undress himself, and as every piece of expensive clothing trails off and reveals the inked skin that you love so much, you can’t help but reach out and touch the tattoos roaming amongst his love handles.

“Gonna start being my good girl?” Harry demands, his body adjusting around your frame as he begins to tap himself along your folds.

The feeling has you shuddering, blinking up at him between your legs as you raise up on your elbows to get a better look. His cock rubbing against your clit, muscles tightening while he still stares as if wanting to ruin you.

“My personal fuck toy.” Letting himself slip between your walls and stretch you out heavenly. The sensation of him filling you up reveals a pleasant sigh as your thighs spread wider around his hips.

“Yes, Mr. Styles… you fuck me so good,” You whine, fingers trailing down his pelvis as he lets his hips glide in with ease.

Harry hums in acknowledgment, his hands finding themselves around your upper thighs, driving into your pussy tenderly letting you feel him expand your walls and sink right against your cervix before drawing back and repeating.

“Mhm, who makes you feel like this darling,” Head craning down as your vision shifts from between your legs to his face coming into view.

“You, only you.” With the quick response your other hand curls into the sheets as your body jerks against the mattress.

“That’s right… you and that dirty mouth of yours,” Breath fanning over your face as his grip along your skin tighten enough to leave bruises, the feeling has you gasping at the pain. “Gonna show me some respect.”

The pace of his thrusts increase leaving his hips to smack against yours. It causes your mouth to hang open and nails drag against his skin at the rapid speed now driving into you. The intense feeling of his cock spreading you wide has your mind a clutter of thoughts.

How can he stretch you out so heavenly yet look at you purely amused by his actions over you? How can he effortlessly pleasure every crevice of your pussy that craves him? How can he fuck the shit out of you yet still have you craving for more? He’s so addicting, so captivating, so intriguing, you’re in awe; you’re in love.

“I’m not one of those little boys you’re used to playing with. You will learn respect.” Eager hips diving into yours that your head falls into the sheets, eyes locking with the chandelier that shifts with every pound of his hips.

“Y —Yes, sir.” Knuckles going white as your spine curves towards his flexing stomach.

“Shut up,” Harry bellows, his hands leaving your thighs; one covering your mouth while the other wraps around your throat.

His harsh words don’t even bruise your feelings, it only has you moaning into his palm with tears beginning to prick your eyes. The blissful pleasure he was making you feel wasn’t even something you can explain.

“You’re such a fucking slut,” His hand releasing your throat to smack you, leaving your vision to trail away from the diamonds that float above and towards his face. Bottom lip between his teeth as his brows push together.

“And I’ll use you just like the one you are.”

Sweat trickles down every expanse of your limbs, bed sheets sticking and the frame of the bed smacking against the window. The tattering sound of it repeatedly hitting it fills the room as your legs hang in the air, shiny heels glistening in the moonlight as you continue to moan against his hand.

Harry could do anything and you would see no wrong, maybe it’s manipulative, maybe it’s controlling but it feels too good that you can’t resist; and why would you want to anyway, he’s the only one to ever make you feel things you never felt before. Like for example right now, the way your thighs begin to shake and spikes of pain course along your calves, only he can do that.

“You’re mine to use, mine to ruin.” His palm releasing from your mouth to land another slap across your cheek, it has you whimpering in response. “Understand me?”

Your lashes flutter as chest heaves drastically, mouth parting and pelvis quivering as you feel your climax barreling in.

“Y —Yes s —sir,” Stuttering as you look at Harry with complete devotion while he basks in it. “Sir.” You whisper, head bobbing with each rough assault to your pussy.

“What? You’re gonna come?” Harry grins, hands meeting your throat and squeezing tightly as he fucks you into the mattress.

“Please, sir, please, can I?” Voice hoarse as your lungs strain for air.

It’s the greedy smirk and shaking head that has your stomach clenching crazily, waist retreating against his furious ones as your fingers tug against the sheet.

“P —Please, Mr. Styles can—”

“—Shut up!”

Grip grows tighter as he continues to pound away. Every rock of his hips pierce your plush walls, and with each jerk of your body up the bed does it remind you that you’re nothing but his toy at the moment, nothing but his doll that he’ll use to his liking.

That’s why tears now flow down your temples, legs shaking against his hips as he toys with your body however he likes while you restrain yourself from releasing all over him.

“Want to be my good girl, then take it.” Face inches away as he watches the tears continue to stream down.

And you do, you suck in your abdomen as your quivering thighs try to close around his waist and accept every fatal attack. Teeth biting into your bottom lip as your throat wheezes for air.

“Play with you however I please,” He grunts, eyes searching your face that begs for oxygen that turns him on even more.

Harry’s hips continue to plunge inside your pussy and bruise your cervix; and with your tight walls twitching around him pleading for release it has his head sliding to the nape of your neck.

You feel him spill his seed into you, a beautiful moan slipping past his lips and along the sweaty skin of your neck as his grip relaxes.

Just the feeling of his come seeping into you has you moaning out, fingers tugging away from the sheets and drawing down his back as his hips don’t stop their torturing movements.

“Please sir, can I come, please,” Whimper tugging through your ruined throat as your lower half now begins to shake from the fight you put up.

“Yes, darling.” The one word you’ve been dying to hear has your stomach relax as you let go and release yourself all over his cock.

Creamy wave of arousal expelling over the thickness of him as his movements never slow. Wet kisses pepper themselves along your neck, his hands by your head feeling over your messy head of hair, while your body continues to twitch and contract around him.

Your grip around him relaxes, hips flexing against his own until he begins to pace himself, slowly rocking into your pussy that makes your chest settle.

“What’s your colour?” Harry asks, head rising and looking over your face. Dizzy expression overcoming your features that has him tugging his hand away from your locks and run over the heated skin.

“Green, sir,” Blinking up at him while swallowing heavily. The answer has Harry nodding, tongue peeking out of his mouth before he’s leaning back on his knees.

Thrusts come to a halt, his cock slipping out that has your mixtures spilling from your folds to drip along the sheets. It’s in the warm atmosphere that you both manage to catch your breaths, chest shallowly welcoming the air as sticky fingers roam up and down the expanse of sweaty skin.

“You’re so good to me baby,” Harry comments, his hands trailing up your leg to begin undoing the strap of your heels. When hearing them smack to the ground do you sigh in relief of having your feet free of the curved platform.

“Mhmm…” You mindlessly hum as you watch in complete awe of him undoing the next one.

“Always perfect for me.” His head running against your calf as he presses light kisses into the skin there. Your favorite words swelling your heart that it makes you get up on your elbows and gesture for him.

“Are we okay now?” You ask, letting your hands run across the skin of his chest.

“Yes baby… just no more surprises, I don’t know what I’ll do next time. Okay?”

“Okay.”

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hana-no-seiiki · 3 months

Text

might be running a little late on the spiderverse post (and by little i mean it’ll prolly be posted this weekend instead when all of us are free) cause i got assigned a task for skewl last minute 😭😭😭😭 so ill just give you guys this short fic/drabble w/ Cat Villain Reader for now that has been rotting in drafts for a bit.

please read my previous cat villain posts for more context !!

If you were to give a rank of the most punchable face in the Batfam, it’d be Damian. No surprise there in hindsight, but the fact that he managed to beat his own dad — the one that left your one true love to die — still astounded you.

Despite his reputation and the fact above, Damian had more calm moments with you than any of his predecessors. It may have been due to other factors; you being older and more mature (less of a brat), that you didn’t hate his guts, or that he wasn’t a masochist like Tim.

But the biggest reason was Talia.

You don’t get how the woman fell for Bruce but she did, and you knew she would do anything for him. You’ve fought her before and she was no joke.

And, she was the only person who helped you with Jason. Who didn’t scoff at your violent reaction towards his death. Who actually understood you, rather than ply you with words of comfort.

So, of course, you were a lot more gentle when it came to her son. Even during his more verbally abusive phase.

Recently however, you’ve noticed a change.

“What?” Damian glared at you (I say as if he looks at you in any other way other than glaring)

“Nothing.” You looked away, your mouth forming a pout. Damn him for having great observational skills even through both of your masks and while you guys were in the middle of a fight.

“Were you just staring at my arms?”

“No!” You shouted in offence. “. . . Yes.”

But how dare of him to be right anyways! It wasn’t your fault his new fit looked tighter on his toned biceps.

In any case, that’s where the change really started to be obvious. Usually after that he’d knock you out or screech curses, but now… now he’d —

“Keep looking. You’re easier to catch when distracted.”

You immediately felt your knees go weak.

The nicknames, too. Good god the nicknames. Some of them were still as degrading as ever, but you also noticed a sudden rise of sweeter ones, some in his mother tongue, others just plain corny.

“Hey Kitty, get your food elsewhere.” Damian greeted you from behind.

Damian never greeted you.

Your fights and/or meet-ups always started with a little roughhousing.

Which, as of the moment, was not happening just yet. Not to mention he didn’t even take advantage of your surprised state.

And so you turn invisible.

Ever the sharp eyed man that he was, he quickly spotted you from the sound of your movements. Yet he doesn’t attack. In the blink of an eye, he appeared right behind you, seizing your arms and whispered, “Did that make you purr?”

You licked him in response. Safe to say that you were smacked down afterwards.

You were starting to think that Damian liked you.

Of course, even though you were confident to a fault, you weren’t conceited. So in order to test that theory, you managed to switch your heists up for when he wasn’t on duty.

And from what you hear from Tim, he hasn’t been doing so great.

So terrible his days have been in fact that he had been sloppy enough to get caught. While the rest of his team was busy fighting you took the opportunity to sneak in. A favour for Talia’s help, you thought.

“Fool! What are you—“ Damian shouted at you. The villain they were fighting was no joke. If you had gotten caught —

His sermon gets interrupted by a kiss from you to the lips. You even shove your tongue down his throat for good measure.

You separate from him after a few minutes.

You think from the fact that he pulls you back in and kisses you as his friends were screaming in the background made it clear that he more than just liked you.

Maybe even loved you…

— to be continued

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere imagine #yandere fic #yandere core #yandere batfam #yandere damian wayne #damian wayne #damian wayne x reader #yandere damian wayne x reader #robin x reader #robin #robin x you #batfam #dc #yandere batfam x reader #batfam x reader #dc x reader

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maximoffgxrl · 2 months

Note

hi i’m not sure if you still take requests but would if you ever have time a yelena belova x reader (platonic) with lots of cuddling and kisses? just a whole ton of fluff and it doesn’t need to be too long? if you can’t/don’t want to do it that’s totally fine but i have such a soft spot for sweet yelena <3

Home {Yelena Belova}

Pairing: Yelena x gn!reader (platonic)

Summary: Yelena arrives from a mission and all she really wants is you

Note: yelena is the best i swear <3 hope you like it! this request has been sitting on my drafts for months, but now it’s finally here!!! so, enjoy 💕

You sighed as you flipped another page on your book, a pink highlighter on your hand and a bunch of loose pages resting in your lap. Were you studying on a friday night again? Yes. Sure, you had promised to yourself that this kind of nerdy behaviour would be left behind in high school, but who could blame you? It's not like you had anything else to do and you actually enjoyed studying.

- Oh, absolutely not. - a familiar voice with a thick accent sounded behing you and you smiled.

- Hey, Yelena. - you turned your head towards the voice, seeing the blonde girl climbing out the window. - Nice to see you're home again. And still unable to use the door.

- I already told you, sometimes I need to climb the window so I can make sure that no one else can climb the window. It is science. Just like your book. - she said, taking off her shoes and coat, her cheeks red from the cold weather. - Now, what are you doing reading a book? When I left, a whole week ago, you were doing that exact same thing.

- Well, I have to. It’s called studying. And if it helps, it was a different book last week. - you answered, watching as the blonde went straight for the kitchen. - But I wanna know about you. Your super secret mission went well? Where were you, after all? Now you can tell me, right?

- Bolivia. And yes, it went well. No one blew me up and it was not for lack of trying. - she said, frowning at the refrigerator. - Now, tell me, Y/N, this studying of yours does not require eating? There’s nothing in here.

- I was planning on ordering something later and I didn’t know you were coming home today. - you said, finally closing the book and resting your head against the armchair. - What do you mean they were trying to blow you up? Are you okay?

- Peachy. - Yelena said, sitting on the sofa. - I wasn’t even shot this time. It’s a big win.

- I don’t think I’ll ever get used to this. - you glanced at her with your eyes a little widened. You still remembered when, a year ago, Yelena showed up holding your announcement and asking if you were the one looking for a roommate. At the time, you didn’t knew you were getting a best friend and a giant headache all in one person. - You know, every time you leave I get worried sick.

- That is very sweet, Y/N Y/L/N, but you don’t have to worry. I am the best, so yeah, no danger here. - she smiled and you held back a laugh. Yelena could be so unintentionally conceited sometimes. - Now, will you please stop with the books, order some pizza and watch a movie with me? I missed you a lot.

- Own, Lena, I missed you too! - your heart melted at the russian’s words, smiling at her. - I’ll just bring this stuff to my room and then we can watch anything you’d like, okay?

She agreed with her head and you piled up all your books, papers and pens and carried them to your room, leaving it all on your desk. Fishing a blanket out of your closet, you picked up your phone and went back to the living room, sitting comfortably in the armchair again as you dialed the number of the pizza place you guys always ordered from.

- The pizza will be here in 40 minutes! - you yelled to make sure Yelena would hear you and went back to your phone, waiting for the girl to come back.

A few minutes later, she showed up in sweatpants and a My Little Pony white t-shirt, her hair wet and carrying a sweet lavender smell. She used your shampoo, but you didn’t really care, just watching as she practically fell onto the couch, resting her head against the pillows.

- So, what are we watching? - you asked, toying with the remote.

- Can we watch the one with the sirens again? You know, the one with the song that was stuck in my head for like a month? - she asked with big puppy eyes.

- Barbie A Mermaid Tale? - you asked with a laugh. Yelena was a big Barbie fan, but she specifically loved this one. - I think we’ve seen this at least five times.

- Please? It’s my favorite! - she pleaded, holding her hands together. - I love the evil fish.

- Okay, okay. But I’ll choose the next one.

- YES! - she exclaimed in pure delight, making you laugh again. If there was something you loved about Yelena, was her almost childlike joy about the little things in life. It was adorable.

You were about to press play when she cleared her throat, making you look in her direction only to find her already staring at you, brows furrowed.

- What? - you asked, a little confused.

- Aren’t you forgetting something? - she asked, rolling her eyes at your absolutely lack of perception. - Cuddling, Y/N Y/L/N, you’re forgetting the most important part of a movie marathon. Get your ass on this couch right now.

You couldn’t help but smile as you got up, laying beside the blonde on the couch and throwing your blanket over the two of you. It wasn’t long until Yelena’s arm was around your waist and the russian’s cheek was resting against your head. You hummed in contentment, feeling relaxed and warm and safe, like you always were with her.

- Now you can start. - she said simply as she placed a kiss against your forehead, making your heart melt all over again.

- It’s nice to have you home. - you said softly, grabbing the blonde’s hand and kissing her knuckles. - You know I love you, right?

- Yeah, you big softie, I love you too. - she said rolling her eyes as she kissed your cheek. - Now shush, my movie is starting.

You just smiled, too enthralled in the feeling of being in Yelena’s arms. She was home now, and it was all that mattered. After all, she was your home.

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shawnxstyles · 2 years

Text

ten times faster

DATE: JULY 29, 2022

summary: as the gang hangs out at your place, peter and you get into an argument about if a guy knows a girl’s body more than her own. when you tell peter that you can come better alone than with him, he decides to prove you wrong.

words: 2.3k

song: A Kiss- the driver era <3

warnings: SMUT (f- receiving [nipple play, fingering] hair pulling, dirty talk?) language, way too much dialogue to deal with

note: this is a random thing i found in my notes and i actually had time to finish it?? i love smut, but let’s be honest, i’m not that good at writing it. but here’s this. frat!peter x female!reader

gif is not mine!

—

“i mean, i think the girl would know her own body the best, i’m just saying,” you stated, sipping on your cheap wine as you laid against the couch. you rested your hand on the arm and crossed your legs. you and your friends were having a night in, discussing topics that were anything but age appropriate.

“girls never get to finish anyway,” betty adds and ned looks at her with the most shocked and hurtful look known to man, “hey! that does not include me. i finish every time. if not more.”

we all gag and pretend to throw up while ned whispers a thanks, babe to betty behind it all. you roll your eyes, ready to move on when mr. thinks-he-knows-it-all-just-because-he-gets-good-grades steals the spotlight (clearly you have some frustrations with school and he does not help).

“i mean, i’ve never been with a girl who hasn’t finished,” peter arrogantly voices with a small smirk curling on his face. you didn’t even know girls slept with him (don’t lie, he’s mildly cute. even attractive at most. okay, he’s very attractive. better?) you almost didn’t say anything.

“what is that even supposed to mean?”

“it means the guy knows his girl’s body more than she knows her own,” he shrugs as if he has said the most simplistic thing in the world. peter tilts his beer bottle as he empties it. he makes an overly exaggerated ahh sound of relief as he downs the liquid. it makes you even more irritated.

“how does that even make sense?! just because you’ve had sex with a bunch of girls doesn’t mean you know their bodies. let alone, made them come,” you bit at him, sitting up in your seat. you were no longer at peace with your wine and the couch wasn’t as comfortable as it had been. even though he is one of the smartest people you know (but you would never admit that), sometimes, peter’s stupidity surprises you.

and to note, it was no doubt, blatantly obvious, and super clear— that peter was your least favorite in the group. you could bet he thought the same towards you too. you two were never really “friends”, but are somehow forced to be together every time if you want to see your actual friends. so that’s how mutual friends were created. don’t you love them?

you don’t. at least not this one.

“princess, you don’t need to be jealous of other girls. if you wanted me to help you out—”

“jealous? how conceited are you? you think i want to sleep with you so you can ‘help’ me? please, i know for a fact i can make myself finish ten times faster and stronger than you ever could,” and with that you snatched the bottle of wine and poured a large measurement into your glass. you chugged a good amount and while doing so, you saw peter’s infamous smirk taunting you from the corner of your eye. you set down your nearly empty glass and excused yourself to the bathroom.

“i love watching two people fight over something exhaustingly stupid. it’s entertaining,” mj says as she sips her tea because she was the driver for the night, “this is going to be very interesting.”

—

as the night comes to a close, you hug and wave off your friends. you say goodbye to mj, betty, and ned and realize peter wasn’t around. you close the front door with a confused look on your face. when you turn around to clean up the wine glasses, peter comes walking into the living room.

“they left, you know,” you say as you bend down to pick up all the glasses, wrappers, and bottles.

“i’m aware,” peter replies as he follows you into the kitchen. you dump all of the garbage in the trash can and wash your hands.

“then why are you still in my house?” you wit, drying off your hands. without looking, you hear peter’s footsteps getting closer to you in the small kitchen.

“i thought we could test your little theory,” he whispers just over your shoulder and it gives you an odd, unwanted sensation down your spine. you turn your head slightly towards him, so you can see him from the corner of your eye.

“which theory? the one that proves how big of a dick you are?” your chest gets tighter with close proximity, but you still have your wits with you. peter puts his hands on the counter, blocking you from leaving.

you hear him chuckle darkly behind you, which causes you to turn around fully.

“you know what i’m talking about.”

your tailbone is pushed against the edge of the tiled counter when he takes another step toward you. you didn’t even think it was possible to be this close to someone.

there was a heated feeling in your lower belly that you knew all too well, but it was a little different. it’s a lustful feeling, but somewhere inside of you knows that you shouldn’t do this. the wrongness of doing this just makes you want to do it more.

“i have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“really? well, let me show you.” he doesn’t wait until you take a deep breath, he just kisses you with hunger and lust. one of his hands from the counter lifts up to caress your neck roughly. you tug at the baby hairs on the back of his neck and you feel him groan in your mouth. one of his fingers gets caught in your hair and he snags it out, but you accidentally moan out.

“oh? you like that?” he releases from the kiss with a smirk, as you try to keep a straight face. he slips off his t-shirt quickly watching your brain rack.

“no—” he lifts you onto the counter and immediately goes back into kissing you with no hesitation. you absentmindedly feel up his body. you’ve never seen him without a shirt on and you would’ve never guessed he was this ripped. you know he saves people for a living, but c’mon on? he gets to be hot too?

what?

okay, you can’t even lie about that. peter IS dangerously attractive whether you hate him or not. it’s a scientific fact in society.

his fingers twists the ends of your shirt and you break the kiss to take it off. you don’t hesitate to get rid of your bra either as you quickly unhook it blindly. peter kisses down your neck harshly as you whimper, trying to keep your moans in. he tugs your hair, now knowing you like it and you can’t help but moan for him. you don’t want him to know how good he’s making you feel, especially when he has barely done anything.

you bit your lip as he kneads your right boob and sucks on your other one. peter sucks around your nipple, pulling and pinching the other one. he spends a good amount of time on your breasts, and if he did it any longer, you sadly might be able to come from just that.

“so i take that you’re a boob guy?” you yank him off of you by his hair. peter groans at the loss of control, so you let go of his hair.

“so you liked it?”

“i never said that—”

“but you never said you didn’t. imagine what it would be like for me to eat you out. may i?” his hand goes straight to the drawstrings on your sweatpants, but you don’t know what he was asking. was he asking if he would take off your sweatpants or eat you out? yes, all of the above is what you wanted to say. oh my god yes a million times yes also came to your head, but that sounds like an agreement to marriage, so maybe not.

“whatever floats your boat, captain,” is what you actually said and you’ve never wanted to hide under a blanket more. embarrassment flows through your veins. however, you stick with it because you can’t change what you said now.

he chuckles with a shake of his head as he slowly tugs your sweatpants down. once they’re off, he pushes your knees to spread your legs and he sees that wet patch of arousal on your panties. peter smirks and you swear you see his brown eyes darken.

“so i take that you’re a boob girl?” he kneads your inner thighs as you huff in frustration.

“shut up and do something,” you roll your eyes.

“aye aye, captain.”

before you could shout and cringe at him, peter’s hands finally go to rub your panties. you whimper as his thumb circles perfectly slow on your clit. you hold his shoulders for balance as you involuntarily move your hips to create faster friction. peter grabs your hips to stop your movements and you whine out.

“more,” you huff, getting wetter and wetter, but aren’t as close to finishing as you can be. he’s deliberately going slow, so you can be tormented.

“tell me what you want, y/n. i’ll probably give it to you,” peter smirks as you looks at you. he removes his hand from your hip to tilt your chin to face him. his eyes are dark and so beautiful it kind of hurts. how can someone so attractive be such a dick? you debate on telling him that you want everything. his mouth, his fingers, his dick. it’s all sounding pretty good right about now.

“dick,” you mumble at him because of his arrogant attitude.

“you want my dick?”

“i—no, i mean yes! but i want your fingers right now,” you squeeze your eyes shut at your neediness and stuttering words. you may be a confident and strong person, but when it comes to sex, you’re the queen at obeying.

“just say please and they’re yours.”

“ugh, you’re such an asshole,” you growl as he flicks your clit three times and you yelp. that little action made you much wetter and he can probably feel that. you are beyond turned on right now and you need him so bad.

“fine! please peter, just do something already!” you grip his shoulders out of irritation and he smiles before yanking your panties down your legs. he rubs you bare for a few moments before he slips two fingers straight into you. you instantly moan out (embarrassing loud), and you can practically feel his ego rising. peter takes his unused hand and pulls at your nipples again. that familiar heat in your belly becomes tighter and tighter as he strategically moves his fingers. peter curls his fingers and twists in a way that’s just so intoxicating and so good that it clouds your mind with lust. you clench around his fingers when he touches a spot deep inside of you.

“you’re so wet. are you going to cum? hmm?” as he talks, his thumb brushes your clit again and you moan again, not trying to hold it back this time.

“peter yes, yes!”

“am i going to make you cum ten times faster and stronger than you can?”

“try me.”

taking the challenge, peter rubs your clit again, while you involuntary open your legs wider, letting him access you deeper. he lowers his head so he’s closer to your ear.

“c’mon love, i know you want to.”

his raspy voice makes you clench around him again and the tightening in your belly finally releases. peter sloppily kisses your neck as you come down from your high.

“good girl,” his deep, sensual voice almost makes you want to do it again. actually, everything he did makes you want to do it again. peter rubs you slowly, drawing your orgasm to a close. he rips off some nearby paper towels and wipes the mess you made. or he made, you should say.

when you go to talk, your voice comes out squeaky, so you clear your throat and try again.

“i still think i can cum faster alone, just so you know,” peter throws the towels in the garbage. you lightly leap off the counter and nearly fall to the ground, but you survive with a little balancing. you bend down to pick up your panties, but they’re gone. you swear you just saw them right there.

“peter—” he turns around with a smirk and your panties twisted around his finger. you gasp, spinning around and grabbing his shirt and throwing it on. you eye him heavily.

“give them back, you dick.”

“or what?”

“or i’m not giving you your shirt back,” you scoff as you cross your arms. his shirt was a bit big for you. meaning, it went down to your mid thighs.

“oh please, keep it. it looks better on you anyway,” he smirks again, looking you up and down and you punch him in the chest. he never has a different expression on his face; just smirking, smirking, and more smirking. “but seriously, i’m keeping these.”

“but why? i really like those ones, asshat! oh my gosh, you probably collect them. you’re a panty collector! i knew you were a weirdo, but jeez, peter,” he coughs looking down, trying to add a comment to your crazy assumption.

“um no. i need to keep these, so when i start telling mj, ned, and betty that i made you cum ten times faster and stronger than you can yourself, i’ll have some proof,” peter winks and starts to walk away. you pinch your face together.

“what are you talking about? you’ll never tell them about this because it never happened! got that?” you shout as he goes across the house. why is he walking around my house?

“whatever floats your boat, captain!”

oh fuck. you’re never living this down.

—

thanks for reading!! 😊

#shawnxstyles #peter parker x reader #peter parker #tom holland spiderman #spiderman #peter parker au #peter parker smut #tom holland smut #peter parker fanfics #peter parker x you

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asherheed · 2 years

Text

curve upon the lips

⚘ ‹ featuring › alhaitham x gn!reader

⚘ ‹ tags › lighthearted, fluff, academic rivals, short-tempered reader, alhaitham is persistent, reader is in denial with a capital d, banter, academic purposed kissing, bad flirting if you squint, both are scholars

⚘ ‹ note › ooc alhaitham purely hc,, mhy i need more alhaitham content #copium,, x

You swore it was just a one-time thing, and that you would never succumb to whatever spell Alhaitham had on you again. You were an individual with morals, unlike him, who can simply throw away whatever belief system he had for the sake of rationality.

That rationality being… a kiss as a solution to your attraction to him—the words you still couldn’t believe came out of his mouth.

“Are you high on shrooms?” You blinked at him confusedly when your brain finally caught up to comprehend his words, before shutting down again. A kiss to answer your what towards him?

Your body felt warm all of a sudden as Haitham raised an eyebrow, glancing at the pretty flush on your cheeks, like it was enough proof for him to make an astute conclusion. You sent him a sharp glare.

“How arrogant can you get?” You hissed in indignation. “I don’t feel anything towards you!”

Haitham looked at you as if you were delusional, and you fumed under his gaze.

“I don’t mean to sound conceited,” he said, sounding apologetic in the most unapologetic tone you’ve heard. He eyed you with curiosity and a hint of mischief. “But I must say you’re looking quite… flustered, more than you were when you were inside the House of Daena.”

How he knew that, you had no idea. He leaned down to examine you closely, taking up your personal space, and you held your breath as he tilted your chin to meet his gaze. You prayed he wouldn’t notice, but the gods were cruel to you.

Alhaitham smirked. “That means the probability that my hypothesis is correct is almost absolute.”

You scowled. “Almost.”

He quirked an eyebrow, taking you up on your challenge. “Exactly. That’s why we should test it accordingly with a kiss.”

“A kiss is too soon, you know,” you argued as he cornered you against the wall, noting how attractive he truly was even when you despised him for being such a know-it-all and the bane of your existence in the Akademiya. “Some people would try to be friends first and go out on dates, but you probably already know that.”

“I do,” he replied, nodding. “But academic rivalry already seems like a pretty amicable relationship to me.”

“You’re incorrigible.”

“You enjoy it,” he noted, and you rolled your eyes, “with displeasure.”

You sighed, letting your anger go, but you felt petty, so you held onto your annoyance instead. He was right in a way; the scholar in you wanted to try this hypothesis of his. For academic purposes.

“Fine.” You slid your hands around his neck, testing your boundaries. Alhaitham tensed under your touch, and you held a laugh inside. “Just one kiss.”

He nodded, and you would have missed the sparkle in his eyes if you weren’t so close already. His hand found its way to your waist, and he pulled you closer as he tenderly held your cheek. You closed your eyes, waiting.

“Oh, and to answer your question,” he delicately traced your jaw with his fingers. “I’m not high on shrooms,” he said, grinning, and placed his lips on yours.

#alhaitham x reader #alhaitham x you #alhaitham x y/n #genshin impact hc #genshin impact #genshin hc #alhaitham hc #ur girl is coping #al haitham #al haitham x reader #al haitham x you #ashe.writing

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lookismlover · 5 months

Text

Goo Kim x Reader: The Fake Date

You had always been infatuated by Gun since the day you met him, the day your father told you he was going to be your bodyguard.

Whether it was with his fighting prowess, that bleak and mature, yet nasty attitude he had, or the overall mysteriousness he had enveloped himself in. You couldn’t put your finger on why, but you were.

It had been almost 2 years since he was made your bodyguard, and even though you spoke every day and he was around you enough to see your tells when you were upset, angry or scared you still felt like you didn’t know him at all.

By this point you realized that the so called “infatuation” you had with him had turned into you liking him, you didn’t know how but it had and yet Gun didn’t even bat an eye at you.

He was there to protect you, not to be romantically involved with you, not in the slightest and yet you wanted him to be, even at the very least, you wanted him to look at you as a potential romantic partner.

Even though you knew this was never going to happen it was a thought that you kept locked away at the back of your mind because after all, even though you felt so close to him, you knew you were still so far away.

However there was one thing or should I say person that brought you too close together in any situation - that was your shared annoyance and hatred for Goo.

You too also had that same annoyance and hatred for that yellow headed bastard.

Ever since you met him, you had never liked him.

I mean what was there to like about him, he was obnoxious, self-obsessed, arrogant, conceited and overall just a money hungry pig.

You hated it whenever you would have to be in the same vicinity as him, let alone talk to him.

You hated that he was your fathers bodyguard and you had to put up with seeing him.

But what you hated more was that you had concocted a plan even you, yourself, hated in order to even try and get a smidge of affection, potentially even a straight up confession out of Guns’ mouth.

That plan was to fake date Goo and make Gun jealous.

It was a plan that even you were willing to go through just to get Gun to notice you in a romantic sense.

Was it something you were proud of coming up with - No.

Was it something you wanted to do to potentially get a reaction out of Gun - Maybe.

Was it petty and distasteful that you had even thought about this and were going to act upon it - Yes.

And so with everything you had thought up and concocted it was time to put your plan into action, the next time you were seeing Goo was tomorrow and so it was time to act.

__________

You wake up to the sound of your alarm. That ear piercing sound that aggravates you every morning. You always reach over and turn it off so you don’t have to hear it but again and again, it goes off.

You soon get up and go do your daily morning routine like always, when you thought about last night, how you were going to act on your plan. When you remembered this fact, you could start to feel your palms sweating and feel heat rising to your face, when you hear a knock at your bedroom door.

You come out of the bathroom and head to the door to open it when you hear an all too familiar voice behind the door, it was Gun. Gun was at your bedroom door at 9 in the morning. You open the door and see him standing there, already in some designer suit, his hair swept back with what you think is too much gel and those black sunglasses of his. You just look at him for a moment before he breaks the silence. “Hurry up and get ready, your father wants me to take you to get something for tonight” Gun says with the stern way he always does. You go away to say something, but you're too groggy to even think or say a snarky comment back to him and so you just oblige and go get ready.

Within 20 minutes you're ready for the day but you’re still not eager to respond to anything anyone has to say, not even Gun. You leave the room to see Gun nowhere in sight and so you just think for a moment before realizing that he's probably outside, having a cigarette waiting for you. You walk through the house getting to the front door and long behold he is in fact there having a cigarette leaning against the car in the driveway waiting for you.

“Finally ready, huh?” he questions.

“Yeah” is the only word you're able to say in your still half asleep state, even though it’s been about an hour since you’ve gotten up. You see Gun slightly smirk before he puts his cigarette out and goes to open the passenger side door for you.

You take this as a silent way of him saying ‘let’s go’ without using any words since you clearly can’t be bothered having a conversation with him. He gets in the driver's side and starts up the car while you sit with your head against the window, almost a sign to Gun that you don’t want to talk and that you’re too tired to even keep up a conversation. That and the fact that you’ve only given him a blank and measly stare at your bedroom door and a simple ‘Yeah’ when he tried to talk to you.

You do in fact doze off before he even leaves the driveway of your father’s house. You wake up to Gun shaking your arm, you look around to see that you’re outside of a dress shop which you suspect you’re going into with Gun. Your suspicions turn out to be true when he says ‘let’s go then’.

You’re in the shop looking about while Gun sits on a couch, leaning his head back as if it's a chore that he’s even here right now, but after all he is your bodyguard. You pick out a few dresses and take them to the fitting room, each time coming out to try and get Gun’s opinion only to be met with a “mhm” or “just pick one” each time, without him even looking at what you put on.

Until finally you find a dress that you really like. Not just one that you randomly picked out to hurry this up or a dress that a shop assistant picked out for you saying ‘this would look good on you’.

It was a long black form fitting dress with a slit that ran up the right side of the leg, a corset type sternum piece that was sheer on the midriff and short off the shoulder sleeves that were barely connected to the dress but was still there.

You take the dress and put it on in the fitting room with a pair of plain black heels that you also brought in and look in the mirror. You love the dress and the heels that you brought in on a whim look great with it as well. You go out and ask Gun what he thinks and again he just says the usual ‘mhm’ without him even looking.

You’ve had enough of him being uninterested and so in anger you slightly shout “look at me, what you do think”.

This definitely prompted a response from him since the first thing he did was pick his head off the back of the coach and look straight at you. You could see his eyebrows raised when he looked at you, but what you would have liked to know is if that was from your slightly over the top reaction or his reaction to the dress.

Without saying a word he stands up and walks over to you, you can’t see his eyes but it almost feels like he’s examining you in the dress. When he eventually gets to you he slightly looks down and then ushers for you to spin around, which you oblige. You slowly spin around while you can still feel Gun staring at you until you come almost face to face with him again, then he eventually speaks.

“This ones the winner I think”

“You didn’t even look at the other ones, obviously you would say that this ones the winner” You say almost annoyed that he hadn’t been looking at you more.

“I did look at the others, but there wasn’t much to look at with those”

“Even if you did look at the others, what do you mean by there wasn't much to look at?” You ask, confused by what he means.

“I mean those weren’t good enough for you, they didn’t suit you either, so this one really is the winner” He says almost sincerely, as if trying to pay you a compliment.

You can’t say anything to what he just said but you can feel your cheeks start to heat up a little bit and so you go back to the fitting room to take the dress and heels off before you go to pay for them. After leaving the shop Gun drops you back off at your home, saying that he has business to take care of and will see you at the event your father's hosting later that evening.

You go into the house only to hear such an irritating voice coming from down the hall, it was Goo. You drop your bags in your room before going to look for the source of your sudden irritation. He was in your father’s study talking to him. You're about to walk away but hear the conversation between them both finish and then Goo walks out spotting you eavesdropping.

“Well well well…did ya have fun listening to the conversation princess?” He says sarcastically, knowing that him speaking to you is enough to get under your skin. But calling you princess however, he knows that will piss you off and it does. You scoff at him, not even saying a word before turning away until he speaks again.

“Heyyyyy princess where are you going, lets talk for a bit”

You stop walking when he says that only to turn and walk towards him. You get face to face with him, being a slight bit childish by putting your finger in his face before speaking to him.

“Stop talking to me and stop fucking calling me princess” You say angrily.

Goo starts to laugh which pisses you off and your anger bubbles over, you take your finger out of his face and go to slap him, but he just leans back and dodges it with ease.

“What was that for, I thought we were having a good conversation…princess” He says still smirking and lightly laughing while knowing that you're getting more and more pissed off.

“Fuck off dickhead” You say angrily, trying no to lash out again and turning around to walk away. But of course Goo couldn’t let you have the last word.

“Well either way i’ll see you later tonight” He says before putting his hands in his pockets and turning around to walk away.

You pause again while walking away to turn your head around to look at the yellow hair bastard that is now walking away from you. Again you scoff while you start to walk back to your room.

You get back to your room and flop down on your bed laying on your back, hand over your face and thinking about your plan. After what’s just happened you don’t want to go through with it but you know that this is probably the only way to get Gun’s attention.

But then your mind drifts back to the dress shop you were at earlier today, where Gun had hardly paid attention to you but complimented you in his own way. You start to think to yourself that this is a bad idea and that you don’t want to go through with it but at the back of your mind you know and you hate that you know this is the best opportunity you have to get Gun’s full attention on you, to get Gun to admit to himself that he might have any feelings at all towards you.

So even though you still think it’s a bad idea, all the thoughts that shoot through your mind get pushed aside with the realization that this is the only way to get Gun.

__________

It was now time for your fathers event, you had got ready, done your hair, makeup, the works.

You were now ready to try and have a civil conversation with Goo, or at least try your best to.

You leave your room taking in a deep breath and walk towards the main area of your home where the event is taking place.

By this point your stomach is in knots, not only thinking about what is going to happen when you eventually ask Goo about fake dating each other, but also what Gun might think of you.

You make your way to the end of the hall, where you take one more deep breath in rounding the corner before inevitably facing all of your father colleagues, work associates and other personnel at the event.

You notice a few faces in the crowd and they notice you, you flash a quick smile at each of them before scanning the room again and spotting Gun.

Gun was talking to your father, presumably about the ‘business’ he had to take care of earlier that day. Out of ethics however, you decide to go over and say hi to your father before trying to find Goo.

You make your way over, then you watch as your father slightly motions for Gun to quiet down as you’re arriving. You didn’t really care what they were saying to each other, you just wanted to find Goo and ask him if he would help - God, you never thought for a million years you would be saying that to yourself. Goo, helping you. HA it was actually laughable.

You swiftly say hi to your father, Gun as well and then make your way to scan the crowd in search of the yellow headed prick himself. Eventually you spot him. Spending time, talking to the women that are there. I mean you say spending, but it is Goo, so you never know if the women are talking to him willingly or if he’s just harassing them.

Whichever one it was you make your way over. Hesitantly, given the circumstances that happened hours before, you speak.

“Goo can i talk to you for a minute” you say in the nicest way you possibly can given that you hate him.

Goo turned around in utter shock that you were even talking to him.

“Wait me!?” “As in me, me, Goo Kim me” he says in sheer disbelief.

“Yes, you, can we talk for a second…away from everyone” you said semi-whispering so nobody could hear. After all, you were embarrassed that you were talking to him, let alone asking him to talk away from open ears and prying eyes.

Both of you exit the busy room as business associates of your father are crowding around him, talking about their next ideas and how great of a business man your father has become.

Unbeknownst to both of you though Gun saw you both leave, thankfully however he didn’t bother to follow you both.

He just thought it was odd that the both of you, of all people, would be talking and leaving a room together.

You decide it would be a good idea to drag Goo into the most secluded place you can think of, at least when it was so busy with your fathers’ business associates - his office.

After the two of you are alone, regret starts to come over you and then follows guilt.

You start to question why you're doing this, not only to yourself but also to Gun, the person you like.

That is until Goo opens that obnoxious mouth of his. That regret and guilt soon turns to anger with the next two sentences that leave his mouth.

“Sooooo…are we here because you want a secret rendezvous and you want me to be the lover in this equation” he pauses for a second.

“If so I’m not interested in doing that with a bitch like you” he says bluntly and then smiles.

Already you can sense that this was a bad idea and that you're also about to explode with anger that he could even be so bold as to say that to you.

But then again, this is Goo and you hate him anyways with how self-obsessed he always is.

You calm yourself down as best you can in the situation and somehow you plaster a fake smile on your face, that even Goo can tell is fake before saying your next few words.

“No, i can assure you that’s not what this is” you deadpan.

“Oh, then what is this?” he asks, now slightly curious about the circumstances.

So, hesitantly, you tell him about what's going on with Gun and your feelings towards him, leaving out the part about fake dating the bastard himself in front of you until you hear what he has to say about all of this first.

After you’re done explaining you look at Goo, no reaction is evident upon his face until an insane smile comes across it and then hysterical laughter follows.

You let him laugh all he wants and then he eventually calms down, after 5 minutes or so, but he does calm down and his laughing spell comes to an end.

That is until he abruptly says.

“So why am I here then?”

“I’m not just here because you wanted someone to confide your feeling to and even then I’m not the one you want to confess to”

He wasn’t wrong, not in the slightest.

You ponder for a moment , trying to convince yourself that this was a good idea but in no sense of this was it a ‘GOOD’ idea.

Putting your pride aside and leaving your last shred of dignity that you still have left after telling Goo all of this, that so-called ‘secret’ that you keep hidden away.

You shakily say.

“Well Gun doesn’t see me as a romantic partner, so-”

He cuts you off before you can say anything else.

“Yeah no shit, he doesn’t see anyone like that, what do you want me to do about-”

“SHUT UP” you screamed.

This time you cut him off before he could finish.

You steady your voice as best you could before continuing on with what you were saying, while also answering his question that you screamed in the middle of.

“What I want you to do is…fake date me in order to make Gun jealous”

The room goes silent, even though it’s just you and Goo in it to begin with.

Even at that moment you could have swore that Goo had even stopped breathing in order to keep quiet.

But the silence was broken by the yellow headed bastard laughing.

Not just hysterically laughing like before, but kackling, almost as if he was mocking you through his laughter this time.

“That’s the dumbest idea i’ve ever heard and i’ve heard some pretty dumb ideas in my time”

You think for a second before calculating your response.

“I know it is, but if you think about it and I mean honestly think about it, what is there to lose?”

You pause and then continue, answering your own question while Goo just lets you speak.

“You hate Gun and like to annoy him, I want to make Gun jealous or annoyed or feel some, ANY, type of emotion towards me - at least the kind that’s visible”

“You don’t have to say yes and even I know that it’s a stupid idea but come on, what wrong with giving it a try, we would both get something out of it”

“Even if you say no though…DON’T… TELL…GUN…”

You stop talking to let Goo speak, then you hear footsteps coming towards you.

Not from outside but from inside, you hadn’t realized it but at some point during your monologue you had closed your eyes and tilted your head down.

The footsteps stopped about an arms length away from you and that’s when you looked up and opened your eyes to see Goo with a sinister grin on his face.

With the room still silent and you being slightly terrified of what was about to come out of his mouth, you back up, just slightly to be a little ways away from Goo.

He just continues to move forward with that sinister smile of his.

You both continued to do this thing, Goo moving forward, you moving backwards, still not saying a word to each other.

The only way you could describe it, was as though it was a weird game of cat and mouse.

But in this equation it felt like predator and prey.

That is until you came to a stop, you had hit your fathers desk that sat almost at the back of the room, so you knew that by this point Goo had won this frivolous game of whatever it was.

After hitting the desk however, Goo didn’t stop coming towards you - No, in fact he continued until you and him were practically face to face.

Enough room to where your lips weren’t touching but you could feel his breath on your face and then he finally spoke.

“Sure”

With that, he spun on his heel and left the office leaving you wondering what he meant by sure.

Sure he’ll fake date you. Sure he won’t say anything to Gun. Sure…sure…sure. It played through your mind, again and again and again. Sure. What did he mean?.

He left wondering what he meant and all you could continue to do was play the entire conversation in your mind.

Still just repeating that one word over and over in your head, sure.

You soon snapped back into reality wondering how long you had been thinking about what he said, you also had to wonder how long you had been gone from the event.

Then your mind started racing again when this time you really did hear footsteps coming from outside of the room.

__________

The air around you felt heavy and thick. Almost like being crushed, due to the overwhelming anxiety that you could feel with each footstep getting closer and closer to the door.

Eventually you snapped back into reality. Making a dash behind your father’s desk and sitting in his chair, legs crossed under the desk, elbows on the desk with your phone in hand trying to look busy and not like you just had an infuriating, yet confusing conversation.

Within a few seconds one of the doors swung open, you made it just in time and thank god you did because it was Gun.

Gun looked confused at first, you however were worried at what he was confused about - Was it because you were behind your father’s desk? Was it because you were in your father’s office? Or was it because he saw Goo leave and now he’s seen you in here as well?.

Your mind raced with all the possibilities of what could be going through his mind, then he spoke and it was the one question you really didn’t want to hear.

“Was that Goo leaving here just now?” Gun asked in a stern yet confused manner.

“Actually yes, it was. Why do you ask?” You say somewhat smugly, yet anxious.

“I just never thought I would see the day when you and Goo would be talking, after all we both know how you feel about him.” Gun says in a monotone voice, now not sounding confused at all.

This was now your chance, your chance to see if he would react, your chance to see how far you could potentially push Gun.

You turned off your phone, putting it down next to a pile of papers and files on the desk. Then with the most sheepish grin you looked up at Gun and started to speak.

“Even if I do feel a certain way about Goo, why do you care if I see him or not. Hell this whole time I might have been pretending not to like him.” You spat. The words coming out as calmly yet as teasingly as you could make them.

Gun stood there expressionless, not saying a single word and not showing a single emotion, at least that was visible. After all, he still had his glasses on so you couldn’t see his eyes.

But something felt off, more with Gun rather than anything. You thought that you had finally gotten a reaction out of him, but that’s not what it was. Someone was getting a reaction out of him but it wasn’t you. That's when you heard it, or rather heard him. Goo was laughing down the hallway, an audible cackle could be heard probably from miles away.

Goo had heard the entire conversation that you and Gun were having. The only thing he could do was cackle at your little comment.

You thought to yourself for a moment that this was the source of Gun's irritation and that off feeling you had and you would have been right, even though you wished it was your comment about Goo. But what you couldn’t predict was that the conversation between you and Gun, as well as his expressionless face, was going to change in a matter of seconds after what Goo had just opened his mouth and said.

What Goo said snapped you back into your conscious mind and it rang through your ears, like a blood curdling scream. Like the alarm you had to wake up to every morning. Like nails on a chalkboard or a fork running across a plate. Your confusion about what Goo meant earlier when he said ‘sure’ was gone within seconds and given that you came up with the idea in the first place, you just had to act like you knew it was coming when you heard it.

“Y’know she’s right, she really was pretending not to like me this whole time. Hell if you paid closer attention to her, you would've known that we've been dating for about 2, no 3 months now.” That’s what Goo said, that’s why Gun’s expression changed after hearing it and that's what you had to play along with.

Gun now looked visibly irritated, glancing back and forth at you and Goo. Goo with that smug smirk of his and you with your now sheepish yet irritated grin. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. I mean come on who could?. You and Goo. Like he said, you both hated each other, at least that's what he thought.

The looks between you and Goo continued until Goo spoke again. “Come on, isn’t now the perfect time to tell him that we’re dating?” Goo said nonchalantly, almost trying to get a reaction out of both you and Gun.

“There is no way in hell, you both are going out with each other. Or as you say, ‘have been’ for the past 3 months like someone said.” Gun spoke in a sarcastic tone, looking directly at Goo when using the word someone and also using air quotes at the words have been.

Goo was away to speak when you stood up from behind the desk, cutting him off before a word could even leave his mouth.

“We actually have been and why are you so skeptical about it Gun?” You question, but also holding firm that you and Goo have had this ‘secret’ relationship going for the past few months.

“Well, I just never thought that you two of all people would be a couple. But apparently I'm wrong.” Gun said in a now irritated voice.

“Guess you were.” You and Goo say in unison, looking at each other and giving each other a very odd small smile. Almost reassuring each other that, yes, you both were going to fake date each other and that, yes, you are definitely going to irritate Gun with this.

Gun by this point was taken aback by what was transpiring in front of him, but still didn’t believe that yourself and Goo were dating. So that’s when he came up with a plan of his own. A plan that not even you thought about.

“Ok I’ll give you both the benefit of the doubt that you're actually going out with one another. But only if you kiss each other right now.” Gun said, smiling intently while looking back and forth between the both of you, to see and also to make sure that you both were in fact dating.

__________

While Gun was looking between you both chuckling to himself because he knew that you both were not dating. Your mind started to swirl with what you could do to convince him.

Until your mind started to short circuit when you felt Goo’s lips press against your own. The kiss then stopped and Goo pulled back hugging you and whispered into your ear.

“Just go along with it” That's all he said and that’s exactly what you did.

Goo kept his arm around you and then moved beside you. This was the point that you could see Gun’s face and god do you wish you could take a picture of it.

Gun stood there with his eyebrows raised and mouth slightly ajar, not knowing what to make of the situation, or potentially being too embarrassed to do anything.

Of course, Goo had to break the silence. “Well get what you wanted?” He asked in an almost mocking tone.

Gun cleared his throat and then spoke in a mocking tone to both of you but mainly Goo. “Well I guess you are going out, who would have thought”.

With that he turned and left. As soon as Gun was no longer in sight you pushed Goo off with as much force as you could, hoping he would fall, but he didn’t.

“What the fuck was that!” You say in a loud whispered scream.

“Didn’t YOU want this? Weren’t YOU the one to ask me to fake date YOU and if so why shouldn’t we kiss to prove OUR relationship, fake or not?” The very few words that Goo then spoke left you speechless because you knew he was right. You knew you couldn’t argue with him and he knew this as well.

With that Goo left and you sat down, thinking and imagining what had just transpired and what was going to happen if this continued.

Either way you didn’t want to stick around at the party any longer and so you went to your room and slept.

__________

The next morning you woke up before your alarm, got ready for the day and headed downstairs. Only to find that Goo and Gun were there with your father, speaking about something that seemed to be important.

You didn’t want to interrupt and as quietly as you could, you tried to tip-toe past them as they were sitting in the living room talking. Unbeknown to you however, you were the main topic of conversation and they did in fact see you, but didn’t call over to you.

You could feel the conversation stop, even only for a moment as you passed. Then as you entered the kitchen, you could hear the conversation pick back up to what it was like before.

You subconsciously shut the door to the kitchen, not wanting to be rude and eavesdrop anymore than you tried to do yesterday (which obviously didn’t end well) and made some cereal for yourself. You sat at the island to let the conversation die before even thinking about going back to your room.

The conversation however, didn’t die down, instead it got more heated. You could hear your father scream at Gun, then pause, then all his anger turned to Goo. You didn’t know what he was angry at, you could only assume that Goo did something stupid like he always did, and he pissed off your father to the max this time, but only if you knew what was really happening.

You looked at your phone to see what time it was, 9:48am. By this point you had finished eating, rinsed out the bowl, put it in the dishwasher and done a few other mundane tasks that you didn’t have to do, but done to kill time.

The conversation had been going since about 9:12am, potentially longer since you remember coming downstairs at that point. You gave yourself another 15 minutes or so before going back through the chaos.

Then at 9:51am, your father called for you, anger clear in his voice. You didn’t know why, but you only assumed that it had something to do with Goo. You also assumed that the conversation was over and he was just calling you out, still stressed, to have a regular father daughter conversation.

You made your way out of the kitchen eagerly to hopefully find out what was going on, or at least get a hint about what happened and you hoped that you could calm your father, even just a small amount. You always hated talking to your father when he was stressed or angry because you felt like you were getting the back end of what happened, but he always apologized to you, saying he didn’t mean it which you knew.

You still left eagerly, walking and contemplating what had happened and wondering how you could console your father this time, or what the conversation was going to be like. Until you saw Gun still sitting on the couch and Goo standing up somewhat defensively with his arms folded across his chest.

You looked from Gun, to Goo, to your father and saw that all of them were looking back at you. Gun looking stoic, yet smug. Goo looking amused as always, but at the same time, almost worried?. And your father looking at you with anger and hurt, almost as though he felt betrayed.

“What’s going on, is everything ok?” you ask.

“Please, sit” Your father said, in what you knew to be his angry voice, while he still tried to keep his cool.

You did as he asked and sat on the chair that was opposite Goo, facing your father, Gun visible at the right side of your peripheral.

“Again, what’s going on?” You ask, still confused.

Your father, still ignoring what you ask then says - “Goo, sit down as well please” practically commanding the room at this point. Goo, not wanting to anger your father further, does just that and sits.

Then your father starts the conversation, eventually answering your question almost immediately and you're shocked by what he asks and also how he found out so quickly.

“Is it true that yourself and Goo are in a…relationship?” Your father practically spat those words at you. Almost like he wanted to stab Goo and send you to your room, telling you not to come out until he permitted it.

You look at your father in shock, again not believing how he found out so quickly. Then looking at Goo to see he was staring straight at you with a death stare. Not the kind of, I hate you one, that you're used to from him. But the kind that immediately sends chills down your spine, a way more accurate representation of a death stare. The kind that says, you caused this situation and I want to kill you, kind of death stare.

You look back at your father, fearful now of what was to come, not being able to say yes or no. But you were able to ask a question that almost confirmed what he was saying, fake relationship or not. “Who told you” was all you said.

“Gun did and thank god he did”

“Why is it so bad if she is going out with me?” Goo questions. While you just stare directly at Gun in shock.

“There is nothing wrong with you, but I don’t want you going out with my daughter” Your father says back. All while you just sit in silence looking directly at Gun, now giving him the same death stare as Goo had just given you.

Gun then chimes into the conversation, but mainly aiming the words directly at you. “I thought it would be best if your father knew what was happening between the both of you, after all I do still need to keep you safe” He says.

“And thank you for telling me Gun, you did the right thing here” Your father says, now somewhat calm at this point.

Gun just bows his head slightly, in a manner that’s clear to everyone to say that he doesn’t want to converse anymore, but also to say, you’re welcome, to your father.

“Even if I am going out with Goo, what’s so wrong about it?” You say, before you even realize that you were speaking again.

You could see that Goo was shocked by this, that you were somewhat…standing up for him?. Your father doesn’t say anything and instead just looks at you in surprise.

“Wasn’t it only yesterday that you hated Goo? And now you're in a relationship with him” Your father asks, as though he was surprised by the revelation that’s happening before him. That you might really be in a relationship with Goo.

You stay quiet for a moment. Then you quickly think back to the conversation yesterday between Goo, Gun and yourself. Realizing that Goo had said you both have been together for 3 months.

Before you spoke you could see Goo getting ready to say something. Not sure what he was about to say, potentially that you both WEREN’T dating. You started speaking before he could even say one word.

“Dad, we’ve been going out for 3 months already. I didn’t want to tell you because I was worried how you would react and clearly I was right in thinking that. We kept up the hating act because it was easier that way and it still does somewhat represent how we are with each other, even now. But please just accept it” You say this, not even recognising how sincere and calm that came across. Also while thinking you could be a great actress.

Everyone now looked at you surprised, but the one person you looked at first wasn’t your father and it certainly wasn’t Gun at this moment in time. It was Goo and he was staring back at you in shock, but what also felt like appreciation for standing up for him.

The conversation continued for what felt like another 40 minutes, but was probably only 5. As your father continued to say that he wasn’t happy with what was going on, but would allow it as long as you were ‘happy’.

He may or may not have threatened Goo about 10 or so times in the process, but allowed the “relationship” to continue as is. But by that point you had withdrawn yourself from the conversation that was happening before you, so many thoughts racing through your mind. But, there were two that were constantly sticking out at you.

The first being that Gun might actually be getting jealous. Jealous enough to go to your father. Sure he might say it’s because it’s his duty to protect you, but you could sense that wasn’t the case.

And the second being that you couldn’t shake the feeling that dating Goo, fake or not, might not be such a bad thing. It might actually be fun…nice even?.

__________

After everything that just happened, you went back to your room, not speaking to anyone after everything was said and done. The only thing you did was check the time on your phone to see how long you had been, 11:37am. It had been almost 2 hours that you were stuck there. 2 hours that you had to listen to your father, but thinking back it must have been longer for Goo and Gun.

You sat in your room for another hour or so to wrap your head around everything, before it all felt suffocating. You wanted to get out, you needed to get out and so you did just that.

You left the house as quietly as you could, not wanting to alarm your father or have Gun trail behind you. You just wanted to be alone and so that’s what you were going to do.

You noted the time on your phone again, 1:03pm and then you told yourself that you would be back before 4pm so as to not alarm anyone. Or at least so you thought.

As time went on and you were just aimlessly walking about to clear your head, while also continuously looking down at your phone to check the time over and over again, you heard a noise.

You didn’t think much of it because you knew better than to poke your nose into other peoples business. Hell, think about what your father did for a living. Basically controlling Goo and Gun, having them take down powerful fighters, while your father hid in the shadows and took down some of his own business associates. You didn’t want to get involved in that, at least not anytime soon if you could help it.

You walked a slight bit faster until the noise was no longer there. You were relieved, then you just walked aimlessly again.

After hearing the noise and getting a bit freaked out, you lost track of time. It had been 3:13pm when you last looked and much like you said to yourself, you had to be back by 4pm so as to not raise concern.

By the time you remembered that fact, you had probably walked around another 3 miles or so. Rather than worry by this point, you broke your rule and just continued to walk, until you were in Seoul.

It had taken about 5 hours to walk to Seoul, even though it should have only taken about an hour, but you didn’t mind. The walk cleared your head and you could just text your father and say you were in Seoul if he asked.

By this point you realized that it was 6:37pm when you had gotten to Seoul. So what better time than to go eat, and potentially go look for some things to buy?.

You went and got some Samgyeopsal (Korean BBQ) and decided that after this you would go window shopping just so you could stay out of the house a little longer. Obviously not wanting to get scolded for running out of the house. But also because of the lecture that would follow the scolding about how ‘reckless’ you had been for leaving in the first place with nobody (Gun) to protect you.

Either way you ate while also swallowing down some guilt as well as anger. Even though the walk was a good way for you to clear your head, you also realized how forthcoming your father was and how overprotective he was. Sure he had his reasons, but you just realized how smothering that started to feel today.

After the meal you did exactly what you had in mind, window shopping. You started to walk around again feeling happy that you had a meal and also had time to think and forget certain things.

Another look at your phone as you were walking about revealed the time to be 7:36pm. It would be getting dark in about 30 minutes and so with this in mind, you decided to head for the subway so that you could hopefully be back before dark. Even though you would have an earful from your father, you figured that with a talk, he would understand your reasons for wanting to leave for a little while.

Before you could reach the subway though, it started to rain. You tried to run but almost slipped and with no umbrella you were getting soaked. You decided to go buy one but to no avail, all of them at the nearest shop had been sold out within minutes of the rain starting.

So you decided to wait, at least until it calmed down a little, but it didn’t. The rain just continued to pour down and get heavier. Your clothes by this point had become weapons against you. The drenched pieces of fabric had become so wet in the few minutes that it had taken you to run to the shop to find an umbrella, that now they were clinging to your skin. Making you almost freeze with every gust of wind or even slight breeze that came your way.

At this point you knew you didn’t have a choice but to run to the subway if you wanted to get home quickly. So you ran, attempting not to slip while running, which you almost failed a few times, but you still made it to the subway in a matter of a few minutes.

To your dismay though, as soon as you looked at the announcements board displaying the trains, times and where they were going to, each of them read delayed. Over and over you read that word, worrying now that you would need to call your father and have him or someone come and get you.

Even though you knew you would be in trouble for having left without a word or also having left without having a so-called “bodyguard” by your side, you figured there was no other way of getting home tonight.

Until you remembered something. Goo lived in an apartment just outside the center of Seoul. You could make it there in about 10 minutes if you wanted to and it would save the lecture. You could say to your father that you were just staying at a friend's house and that had been where you were the entire day.

You didn’t know why you hadn’t thought about that idea before now. But then again until last night, which was now about a day ago, technically 2 days ago if you counted separate days on a callander, you didn’t really have a conversation with Goo, at least not a civilized one.

With this in mind though, you thought to yourself about how it would be fine, that Goo would let you in, at least for the night, right?. Either way you didn’t really have a choice. Because as soon as you picked up your phone and pressed the call button on the contact that was named ‘Father’, you needed to stay.

_________

Your father answered and you explained everything, about how it was all too much this morning, about how you needed to get out of the house and about where you were right now.

To say he was mad would be an understatement, yet he also understood where you were coming from. He apologized and you did the same. Then you brought up that you were going to stay at a friend’s house for the night. That you were only doing this to get some time away and he didn’t question you.

He asked if you needed anything, to which you told him you didn't and you would buy anything if you needed it. He told you that was fine, apologized one last time and with that the phone call ended. Now you knew had no choice but to go to Goo’s apartment.

You started walking through the rain that was still pouring down, not caring about an umbrella by this point. You just wanted to get somewhere warm and that was hopefully where you were going right now.

After walking about 5 minutes, you looked up at his apartment building that was standing tall just outside the center of Seoul. While doing this you were glad that at some points you did listen to the idiot while he was talking, otherwise you wouldn’t have known about him living so close to where you currently were.

You were also happy that you were almost there. Excited almost. Maybe due to this being one of the most ‘rebellious’ things you’ve done especially in recent years - but oh well, you needed to get out even for one night.

After another 7 minutes, and getting slightly lost trying to find the entrance, you eventually made it. You were outside his apartment building, getting ready to walk inside. You took a breath and did just that.

Security was looking at you as if you didn’t belong there. I mean you couldn’t blame them. Soaking wet hair, clothes that were now stuck to your body and dripping water all over the floor. Yeah - you couldn’t blame them for thinking that.

Either way you walked past slightly nervous, while also trying to crack a joke about how wet it was outside. But to no avail, there wasn’t even a small chuckle from any of them, not even the receptionist.

You continued on, trying to look like you knew where you were going so nobody would question you. You got into the elevator with no questions asked, but distasteful staring looking your way as you were leaving wet footprints on the marble as you walked through the lobby.

In the elevator you clicked 2 floor buttons that you thought his apartment could be on, the first being the 14th floor and the second being the 16th. In your mind, you thought that if those floors weren’t where his apartment was then it had to be the 15th. When the doors opened up on the 14th floor, you knew that this wasn’t the right floor when the apartments didn’t look “expensive” enough - at least not for Goo.

You then reached the 16th floor where all of the penthouse apartments were and then you knew you were right with at least one of your three guesses.

Penthouse apartment number 113, that was his. You remembered because anything with the number 13 always stuck in your head for some odd reason. You stepped out, not knowing if someone else would see you and judge you even more than the security or receptionist had when you arrived.

There was no one. You breathed a sigh of relief and started to walk to his door, rehearsing what you could say to persuade him to let you into his home.

Then it hit you, what if he wasn’t there?. What if he was out? What if your father had called ahead and warned him that you might be coming, that he would then come and get you if you showed up at Goo’s?.

No, you had to clear your mind. Plus you also told your father that you would be staying at a friend’s house, so why would he question you.

You arrived in front of his door, it was almost obnoxious as Goo himself. Gold outlines of vines spewed across the matt black door. A gold doorbell at the side of his door, along with a gold door knocker with a wolf’s face on it?.

You looked disgustingly at the door knocker, but again this was Goo’s apartment you thought, so this was normal. He liked money and even though he didn’t like spending it all that often, when he did, he really went all out on expensive things. But then again money can’t always buy taste…clearly.

By this point you had enough courage to ring the doorbell and so you did. Ring… wait…nothing. Ring…wait…nothing. Ring…wait…nothing.

In that instant your fear was coming to life. He wasn’t there. What were you going to do now?. Go back into the rain?. Try to call a friend at 8:13pm and hope that their parents would let you stay with, well, nothing for one night just because you didn’t want to go home and was too stubborn to let your father have someone drop things off?.

You thought for another minute and then gave the bell one last ring, hoping that he was in. Ring…wait…nothi - in that moment the door slammed open, revealing Goo with no glasses on, his hair and body just as wet as yours and a towel wrapped around his waist.

He was in the shower. That’s why he wasn’t answering. Goo clicked his fingers in your face a few times before you snapped back from your thoughts and then he spoke.

“My eyes are up here princess” he said with a slight bit of sarcasm, adding the nickname that you hated for good measure.

“Huh?” You muttered confused.

“What too shy to admit that you’ve wanted to see my abs all this time, that’s ok, here you go” Goo said with all the flirtiness and sarcasm he could muster.

You let out a sigh along with a small chuckle, before you spoke again.

“Listen Goo, I’m not here for you I… I need a place to stay tonight, so can I stay here?” You say with a hint of sadness in your voice.

Goo looks at you for a moment before the smile tugging on his lips, drops to a straight line . Then without another word he moves aside, letting you in. No questions, no snarkiness, nothing, just Goo purely showing kindness.

You walk inside taking in all the expensive furniture. The dark wallpaper and paint, with accents of blue, gold and silver in different parts of the house. It was a bit different from what you had expected, especially for Goo. I mean he always wears bright colors.

The door shuts and then you hear a lock click into place. Much like when the door slammed open, the door locking snapped you out of your train of thought.

You turn to Goo, then just stare because you don't know what to say. You expected him to put up more of a fight. To question you on why you were here. Hell, you even expected him not to be here or even for him not to let you inside. But this scenario, you didn’t plan for. You hadn’t even thought it was a possibility. Goo saying a few sarcastic and flirtatious comments like he always did, even while being an ass and then letting you in when you said you needed a place to stay for the night. This was not something you were expecting - you didn’t expect kindness from him at all.

__________

Without a second thought in Goo’s mind, he breaks the silence. “Well my showers been ruined now and clearly you’ve already had a shower. But not a very hot one I'm assuming?”

With another slight chuckle leaving your lips and Goo then smiling again, the tension is then gone between you both. You both just laugh until there is a breeze and you shiver. Goo takes note of this and grabs your wrist, leading you to the bathroom, not saying a word.

“What are you doing?” You ask.

Goo doesn’t say anything but hands you a towel and then leaves for a moment. He then returns with one of his shirts and a pair of sweatpants. He hands them to you without saying anything else, while grabbing the ones that were already in the bathroom and throwing them outside onto a nearby sofa, nicely taking his glasses in his hand and then grabbing the door handle.

As he’s leaving, that's when he finally speaks. “Go in the showers and change before you catch a cold”. With that the door shuts. You lock it and then hear rustling on the outside of the door, presumably Goo changing. But then you take into account how kind he’s being.

You reiterate to yourself about how, technically, it’s only been 2 days since the both of you have started to talk civilly to one another and how in those 2 days, so much has happened.

You’ve had multiple conversations, started to fake date, Gun then found out almost immediately, you’ve kissed, Gun told your father, your father lectured you, screamed at you and Goo, you stood up for Goo and then that same day you walked to his apartment in the rain needing a place to stay for the night. Now you're in his bathroom, in his house, getting ready to shower and staying the night.

How all of this has happened you have no idea and you don’t really want to know, or rather, you don’t want to admit that this is all your doing, just to get Gun’s attention. But now thinking about how you might have his attention, you’re not that bothered.

Instead, right here, right now, in Goo’s bathroom, you care more about what he will think of you when you walk out. You care more about what the supposed ‘yellow haired bastard’ thinks of you rather than the person you have been fascinated about for years, and you don’t know what to make of it.

__________

You get out of the shower and put on Goo’s clothes. Tying the waistband of the sweatpants as far as they can go so they won’t fall off of you, and trying to sit the shirt across your shoulders but to no avail as it keeps slipping down your left shoulder.

You sigh and realize that there is no hairbrush for you to comb your hair and that there also isn’t a toothbrush for you. Although thinking any of these thoughts isn’t exactly helping your case, considering you did show up at his house unannounced.

You tidy the bathroom as best you can before leaving and going to find Goo to ask if he has a spare toothbrush and hairbrush that you could use while you're here. However, once you leave the bathroom the house seems oddly quiet.

You shout out to Goo to ask him the questions, but no response. You wonder if this is the part of your earlier thoughts where your father comes through the door and takes you home. But again you say to yourself that he doesn’t know you're here, he thinks you're at a friend's house. Either way, you don't have a choice but to wait and see what happens. So you sit on his sofa and go on your phone.

Another 15 minutes goes by and then Goo comes through the door, almost tripping on himself, until you see he’s holding some bags. Goo looks up and sees that you’re out of the shower. Meanwhile, you're looking at him trying to not laugh as he did almost fall over. Then you take in his appearance, only for a few seconds. His hair is still wet but neat enough and he’s in regular no name brand clothes with his glasses on.

Trying to ignore that he almost fell, he nonchalantly takes off his shoes and hands you one of the two bags. With a gesture of his head, you know that this is somehow his way of saying ‘open it’ and so you do just that.

Inside the bag is everything you might need to stay at his place for a night, or by the looks of things, maybe more. There’s a hairbrush, toothbrush, some makeup wipes, hair ties, deodorant, everything that you might need and more. You’re left speechless.

But it doesn’t end there, Goo motions for another bag, the bag he almost tripped on. You pick it up and see that it’s another regular black bag, as if he also got it from the convenience store. In this bag though is clothes. Some luxury brands sit in the bag like Dior and Saint Laurent and then some regular clothes like a plain black hoodie and ripped blue jeans.

You look at Goo in shock, complete and utter shock. Clearly it was evident on your face and he realized that because he spoke, in a calm yet unconcerned tone.

“I know you said you needed a place to stay for tonight, but I figured it couldn’t hurt to buy a few things in case you’re in this…predicament again”. He then stopped speaking for a few seconds and added onto the initial sentence.

“Also I'll be invoicing you for the clothes. They were expensive after all”. You pause for a second to look at him and he’s entirely serious. By this point you can’t help but laugh uncontrollably, he does the same after seeing you practically doubled over. But he also reiterates that he’s in fact entirely serious about invoicing you.

You don’t fight him, instead you transfer the money that he asks for because you didn’t want to hear him complain if it came to that. Once all was said and done, you both sat down, not saying a word, rather you both soaked up the silence. The odd thing was, the silence wasn’t eerie, rather it was tranquil and you both could feel it. You sat like that for a good few minutes before Goo finally asked the question that you would rather not answer, at least for tonight.

“So why are you here?”

“Well, I needed time away and given everything that happened today I think it’s only fitting that I come and stay at my ‘boyfriends’ house, don’t you think?” You say jokingly, trying to avoid the question, while also answering it and trying to sound lighthearted.

“True, very true. I mean what type of ‘boyfriend’ would let their ‘girlfriend’ spend a night out on the streets, especially when there’s a downpour, even if they might have wanted them to”

You look at Goo after he speaks, registering the last part of his sentence. Then he laughs and you join him. You both continue to talk, not about your father, not about what happened today, but just talk. It started with the weather, then how you got here and about why Goo went out and bought you clothes and such. Then the conversation turned to your feelings, more specifically about Gun.

“Listen, I get that you have this weird fascination with Gun. But of all people to choose from to date, HIM!?” Goo says in a confused and mocking way.

Feeling a sense of deja vu, you try to steer away from the topic but he keeps coming back round to it. Eventually you think Goo is done when he gets up, but instead he comes back with a bottle of wine and two glasses.

You look at him with a disappointed look on your face given you're both underage, but you feel like you need it and you figure that your father would be fine with it even if he did find out, since he does give you drinks at home. So once the bottle is open and there’s a half full glass that's being handed to you, you oblige and take it from Goo.

You swirl the glass around a few times before taking a drink, it’s not as bitter as other red wines you’ve had and so you pick up the bottle. Black raspberry. Huh, at least Goo has good taste.

You put the bottle back down and take another sip, then your mind slips back to the earlier conversation about Gun. You take one last sip and then you start to speak.

“I guess the fascination comes from the fact that Gun understands me. I don’t know how to explain it, but he does. I don’t like that he does, but then again he has been with me for so long that I can’t exactly deny the obvious. There’s also him being, well…mysterious I guess. You’ve both been with me and my father for so long that I can’t help but wonder about him, about what he was like in Japan. I mean I know some bits and pieces but nothing substantial. I don’t think anyone knows about Gun’s past fully apart from my father and some people that came to Korea to kill him for what he’s done to them. I think that’s why, but who knows really” You say this and turn to Goo, he’s leaning forward, attentively listening to every word you’re saying and you appreciate it.

“Again, true, but what about me?” Goo asks.

“Huh?” You say confused about what he's asking.

“I mean much like you said, ME and Gun have been with you and your father for so long now, so aren’t you curious about me, or is it just Gun?” Goo asks, as if trying to pry some of your feelings out on what you think about him.

For some reason with that question, you feel your heart start to race slightly. You ignore it and start to think. You think about what you’re going to say, if you’re going to tell him what you’re thinking right now, if you’re going to stretch the truth a little, or, if you’re going to lie to him. You have another sip of your wine, sigh, and then settle on telling him the truth.

“Sure, I've been curious about you as well, but not as much as Gun. It’s also not like I could have asked you this and that about yourself though. I mean we hated each other and I think partially we still do. We have this whole bargain, fake dating thing going on obviously. Which we each get benefits out of. You piss off Gun, I get his attention and also see if he might have at least some feelings for me. But it’s not like we actually care about each other. I mean we never have really. From the time that we first met each other, we’ve just never..clicked. At least I don’t think we have. I also honestly think that in the past 2 days, we’ve spoken more to each other than in the past 2 almost 3 years that we’ve known each other. It’s funny though. I mean thinking back, I don’t think there was ever a time when we were in the same proximity and didn’t argue. Yet right now, we're sitting down, having a drink, while also holding a regular open and honest conversation with one another. It’s a miracle if you really think about it”.

After saying everything you think about Goo and your relationship with him, you feel some sort of weight lift from your shoulders. As if this has been burdening you for a while and you're glad it’s out now. You look up from the wine glass to see that Goo is still looking at you and listening to you so attentively. Then he speaks.

“What if this entire time, I've never hated you?”

__________

You continue to look at Goo but this time it’s with confusion. You both stare at each other for what feels like hours, but you know it’s only been about 20 seconds. Goo then breaks the silence first.

“Don’t look at me like that”

“Don’t look at you like what. Like you didn’t just say that you’ve never hated me? Also, what do you even mean by that? You mean you’ve never hated me ever, even when I was a bitch to you or you’ve never hated me because you…”

You stall with the last thing that you’re about to say because you’re not sure if you want to know the answer to it. Goo looks at you as if forming his answer, but then he just starts to speak his mind. Or at least what you think is him speaking his mind, but then again this is Goo, he always says what he’s thinking.

“What I mean when I say I've never hated you is that, well, I've never hated you. I can’t explain it, I just never have. I think it’s because you’re so easy to rile up that even when you are a bitch, it’s fun. You speak the truth, try and hit me, obviously I dodge with ease and you just gradually get more and more pissy, which in turn makes it even more fun. It's a constant cycle you see” Goo says this with so much conviction and pleasure in his voice that you think he’s getting a kick out of it. Almost as if at this very moment he’s trying to piss you off.

You just continue to look at Goo with a little less confusion now, but more annoyance rather than anything else. Goo just looks at you and starts to laugh because he knows that he’s got you annoyed. Which makes you even more annoyed.

“You know it really is easy to piss you off” Goo says while trying to stifle his laughter.

“Oh fuck off” You say as you’re gradually getting more angry.

“What, it is. It’s not my fault it’s easy, that part is kinda on you”

“You know how you just said that you’ve never hated me?” You say lacing it with a hint of snarkiness.

“Yes?” Goo says confused.

“Well I can’t say the same thing about you” You say this with all the snarkiness and pettiness you can muster.

“Oh come on, don’t be like that” Goo says sarcastically.

“Oh yeah and why shouldn’t I be like this?” You say, snapping back at him.

“Because you’re just proving my point”

You know that you can’t argue with him anymore because he’s right. You will be proving his point if you continue to argue with him and get even more snappier. But the thing is that right now you are proving his point. Even the way that you just spoke to him proves his point and you hate that he’s right.

“Also what were you going to say?” Goo asks you.

“What was I going to say, when?” You ask.

“When you were asking me what I mean when I said I didn’t hate you”

You just look at Goo confused because you’ve already forgotten the conversation with Goo being such a pain. Goo then sighs and speaks again.

“Y’know, the part where you trailed off. “Or you’ve never hated me because you…”. Y’know that part?” Goo questions, but the only thing you can think of is how he just tried to mimic your voice. You’re slightly annoyed but at the same time you also try not to laugh at him. But then you remember what you were going to say after that last part.

“OH, that was nothing, just ignore that last part” You say now getting slightly flustered by what you thought.

Goo just looks at you, his brows furrowed as if he’s saying that’s bullshit and you know it. But you’re not about to tell him the truth and you’re sure as hell not going to tell him that you were thinking that he might…like you. That thought has to be burned out of your brain immediately. Goo just nods his head and then doesn’t speak of it again.

You both finish your glasses of wine, not saying a word to one another. Eventually Goo gets up and you think he’s going to pour you both another glass, but instead he walks upstairs. You assume he’s going to bed and that he’s leaving you to fend for yourself. Selfish asshole. But then Goo emerges with a blanket and a few pillows.

“I’m tired so I'm going to bed. You take the bed, it’s upstairs, first door on the left. I’ll take the sofa” Goo says.

You’re not entirely sure what to make of it. He’s letting you take the bed and he’s the one taking the sofa, after you show up unannounced. That doesn’t seem right.

“No it’s ok. I'll take the sofa, I mean I am the one who just turned up” You say sarcastically. Goo laughs at your statement, but then proceeds to usher you off the sofa as he lays down the pillows and the blanket and lays down.

“I did just say that I would take the couch. I mean I'm pretty sure you heard me say it right?” You question Goo because his actions are surprising you even more now.

“Yup I heard you. But I just didn’t care enough to go back upstairs. Anyway, off you go, go to bed” The way that Goo says this makes you feel little. Not little as if you feel beneath him, but little as if you're a little kid again and you don’t like it.

“Goo seriously. You're really annoying me now. I told you I'll take the sofa, you go back up to bed. It’s your apartment so I'm fine with it, just go” Your words come off frosty, which is what you were intending. But as you're walking towards him getting ready to yank the blanket back and push him off the sofa if need be, he turns, just as your about to do so.

“I told you take the bed”

“And I told you no”

You’re standing over Goo now, arms folded over your chest. You do feel as if you're being a little child at this moment. But in all honesty, you’re not letting Goo have the couch because you would feel bad.

“Fine” Goo says after about 10 seconds or so of you standing in front of him.

“Good” You say somewhat feeling accomplished that you’ve now won the argument. But Goo doesn’t get up.

“Are you getting up?” You question. But before he even gives you an answer, you’re pulled down onto the sofa next to Goo.

“What are you doing!” You yell.

“All I said was fine. I never said I was going to go to bed. But you were adamant about having the sofa. So now you’ve got the sofa” You shiver at his words because he’s right behind you, whispering in your ear. Holding onto your waist as he’s speaking.

“But…” Is all you can say before Goo grumbles into the back of your neck. You don’t want to move because you wouldn’t feel as if you won. And I mean technically you hadn’t won, but you still got the sofa, right?.

__________

You’re not sure how long you had been lying for now, but you gather it had been a while. Goo still had an arm slung around your waist, but his breathing was steady now. He was asleep. You were just lying there. Still as can be.

You tried not to move too much because you didn’t want to be cuddling up with Goo. At the rate it was going though, there would only be 2 options. Either you cuddle up with Goo and somewhat still “win” the argument you both had, or you could go to his bed.

You tried to crane your head to see Goo as best you could. What you saw was Goo face, peaceful as could be. You didn’t think you would ever see Goo this peaceful in his life. But yet here he was. Eyes closed, his long eyelashes visible, hair messy, no glasses and looking so peaceful.

You turned back around and did what you didn’t want to do. But you also didn’t want to disturb his sleep. So, you back your way up just slightly until you felt your back hit his chest. That was when you heard him mumble again.

You weren’t sure if he was awake, but either way you still kept quiet. Then you felt his arms. Instead of there being one arm just slung around your waist, there was now 2. One underneath your waist, holding you tightly and the other also now holding you tightly.

Goo then pulled you even closer to him. So close that the only thing you could think of was him. How nice it felt to be so close to him. How you both fit together so well, almost like a piece of a puzzle and how nice he smelt.

Then without you meaning to. You put your hands on top of his. Grabbing onto his arms and locking yours in place. Then you laid your head down on one of the pillows, ready to fall asleep.

But you felt Goo graze the back of your neck with his nose, it made you giggle because it tickled slightly. Then you felt him kiss the back of your neck, before he spoke in a raspy i’m just up voice. “Goodnight” Was all he said but that made your heart skip a beat.

You kept your eyes open for a few more minutes just processing what had happened. But with the warmth you were feeling and not wanting to think about anything else until tomorrow, you shut your eyes and fell asleep.

__________

You wake up with a slight headache, but what really draws your attention is that you feel breath on your face. You eventually open your eyes and see that you’re face to face with Goo. You don’t know what to do, but you think back to last night and then it clicks. You fell asleep after he kissed the back of your neck and told you goodnight and you both fell asleep.

You think about what to do and while you’re doing so, you’re frightened by a voice.

“Good morning” Goo says to you in a raspy voice and it reminds you of what he sounded like last night.

“Morning” You say back to him.

Goo then slowly opens his eyes and you’re just staring right at him when his eyes do open. You wonder if he’g he's going to say something, but nothing leaves his mouth. He just stares back at you, while you stare at him.

There’s something in his eyes that you can’t quite place. You think it might be confusion or perhaps regret. But Goo doesn’t say anything. He just continues to stare with that something being present in his eyes.

“So are we going to get up or are we just going to lay down and look awkwardly at each other?” You question Goo on the matter. Partially to break the tension, but mostly because you’re so close to him.

“Uh yeah, yeah” Goo says back to you. But when he says this to you his voice almost sounds sad. After hearing him say yes though, you waste no time in getting out of his grip and getting up from the safe. After doing that you look at the wine glasses and bottle. Now you remember why you woke up with a headache.

You pick up the glasses and bottle as Goo is just continuing to stare. Like fully STARE at you. You feel like if he could stare harder and potentially cause a hole to form through you, he would do it.

Either way, you do your best to ignore him and clean up. Which you do. But it’s mostly to keep yourself distracted from the awkwardness. After cleaning, you practically do your morning routine. Brushing your hair, brushing your teeth, getting something to eat.

You’re doing the last part of your routine while Goo is still on the sofa just looking at you. You don’t know why he’s staring at you but it’s starting to annoy you. But even though it’s starting to annoy you, you can’t help but feel giddy that he’s staring at you so much.

You start to make breakfast with what Goo has in his fridge, he doesn’t have much but you can make do. You shout back to Goo asking if he wants anything and he just responds with “Whatever you're having”. So you make 2 omelets.

Once you finish making them you take both plates and go back to the sofa, handing one to Goo as you pass. But you don’t sit on the sofa, you sit on the floor, which garners a what are you doing look from Goo.

“What are you doing?” Goo asks. Yup, it was a what are you doing look.

“Sitting and eating” You say back.

“That doesn’t explain why you’re on the floor”

“Because I wanted to sit on the floor” You say back to him sarcastically.

“Why?” Goo asks, confused.

“Because, why not?”

Goo just sighs and starts eating. So you do the same. Both of you finish and then Goo gets up and takes the plates. But you feel as if there is a specific conversation that needs to be had. You’re just not sure which conversation that is going to be yet.

After breakfast Goo went and did his normal routine, or at least what you expect to be his normal routine. Finally, he sits down. Before you even think about what conversation needs to be had, he speaks.

“So”

“So?”

“So, are you going back today?” Goo asks.

“Back home?” You say back to him.

“Yup”

“Probably”

“Why?” Goo questions, as if he’s expecting you to stay another day.

“Why?” You question back.

“Yes, why?” Goo questions again.

“Because I should probably go back home” You say back to him.

“But didn’t you come here to get away?. I mean seriously. One day and that’s enough for you?” Goo questions again.

Sure you needed to get away, but you were only going to be gone for one night. More importantly though, is Goo asking you to stay?.

“I mean I did get away right?”

“Yes, you did”

“Ok, so we’ve clarified that I got away”

“That we have”

“Ok great. So why are you being so pushy on me staying here another night. I mean do you want me to stay?”

“Yes” Goo says matter-of-factly.

Well you weren’t expecting that. I mean you liked the honesty, but wow, that caught you by surprise. You think about it for a moment. I mean could you really stay away for another night?. You told your father that you were only going to be gone for the night. What would he say if you were staying out another night?.

You think and think. Mainly thinking about what your father would say and then you think about the fact that Goo actually wants you to stay another night. Once you’ve cleared your thoughts you pick up your phone and walk away from Goo. You click on the same contact that you clicked on last night. Father. Then you press call again.

This time he doesn’t pick up after the first call, so you call again. Then he picks up.

“Hi, how are you this morning?. Do you need a car to come and pick you up?” Your father says from the other end of the phone. You’re quiet for a moment and in that moment you look at Goo. He’s just staring back at you. The look on his face is that of confusion and uncertainty, but you think he knows what you’re doing.

“Hi. I’m fine dad and no the car won’t be necessary. I’m..uh…I’m going to stay another night with my friends, maybe even two. I hope that’s ok?” You say to your father. Your voice hushed so that Goo couldn't hear.

Your father sighs. This is your way of knowing that your father isn’t happy that you're staying over again but he’s going to let you and sure enough he did. The call ended and the only thing he asked of you, was that you call him every morning and night. You agreed and so that was that. You were going to stay with Goo another night. Possibly 2.

You went back over and sat down - this time on the sofa.

“Well, looks like I’m stuck here again” You say to Goo playfully as you lay your head down on the back of the sofa. Goo just looks at you with a smile on his face and you’re not sure how to take it. I mean why did he want you to stay?.

“Hey Goo, why did you want me to stay?” You ask him, hoping to clear your mind a little.

“Good question and I’ll be honest. It’s because you’re good company” He says back.

Safe to say you’re not sure how you feel about that. But the most you do know is that you don’t mind that answer. And that was obvious to Goo as well considering the smile that was plastered on your face. Goo just smiles back at you.

A few minutes later, both you and Goo are cleaning the house. He did say he could do it alone, but you had already started lifting the blanket and pillows off of the sofa before he could argue with you.

“So, the first door on the left upstairs, right?” You ask him just to clarify where you’re taking the blanket and pillows.

“Yup”

“Cool. Where do you want them?” You ask.

“Just put the pillows back on the bed and the blanked at the bottom”

“Ok”

After asking you walk upstairs and into his bedroom. Odd, was the first word that came to mind. Much like the house itself, you expected it to be colorful, but it wasn’t. It was also just really…clean?. You, yourself are even confused as to why you were expecting his room to be a mess, but nevertheless, you were.

You continue to look around and then you see the color you’ve been waiting to see. His closet door is slightly ajar and all you see are his obnoxious suits in all different colors. You laugh to yourself at just the thought of his house being painted bright colors. You’re definitely glad that he didn’t do that to himself or anyone else for that matter.

After your laughing fit is over with, you do as Goo told you to do with the pillows and blanket. Once you’re done you take one last look around the room, nodding in approval of the cleanliness. But as you’re walking out you see a framed picture on the drawers by his door.

It’s of Gun, Goo and yourself. You pick up the picture and study it more closely, only to remember that this is the day that the both of them and your father took you to a theme park for your birthday a few years back. You smile at the memory and then look at the picture again, only to see that you’re looking at Gun and Goo…Goo’s look at you. But not with disgust or anger or any emotion you correlate to a grievance in a person. He’s looking at you like your father looks at you, with eyes full of…love?.

You put the picture down and leave the room, unsure if that’s the right emotion he’s got in his eyes. You’re sure you’re overthinking this. Yes, that has to be it. You’re overthinking it, you say to yourself. You walk back downstairs and look around. Goo isn’t anywhere you can see. You shout for him a couple of times, but to no avail. There’s no answer, he left.

An hour passes and Goo still isn’t back. Then another hour. Then another. By the fourth hour you wonder if your father had called him when you were upstairs and you figured he had. It’s now lunchtime and you’re getting hungry. So much like this morning you go over to the kitchen and start making something. Only then do you see the note that Goo must have left for you.

‘Your dad called. I have to go out and deal with a few things. Be back when I’m back, Goo. x”

Once you read it you nod in appreciation that he left a note at all. Then you do a double take back to the note. Your eyes grow wide as you see he’s left an ‘x’ at the end of the note. Once again your heart starts beating faster and you’re not sure what to make of it. God, Goo really is messing with your head and you don’t like it one bit.

_________

You're sleeping when Goo arrives back at his apartment, so you don’t hear him come in or come over to you at all. It isn’t until you feel your head being lifted up ever so slightly, that you stir and open your eyes only a fraction.

When you do, you see Goo looking up at the TV while eating his dinner and then you realize that your head is on his lap. You don’t want to move or even let on that you’re away. So instead you just close your eyes again. Falling asleep.

Once you wake up for the second time, Goo is nowhere to be seen. You think for a moment. Was that a dream?. Was I just dreaming?. No. No, that had to be real. That was real. Only a few moments after reassuring yourself that what happened wasn’t a dream, Goo appeared at the top of the stairs.

“Oh, she lives” Goo Says sarcastically.

“Ha ha. What time is it?”

“No need to be so miserable after you wake. I mean you were dead to the world. I was having my doubts you were still alive. Oh and it’s…6:08pm”

“Ok, thanks. When did you get back?”

“Abooouut, an hour about”

“Ok. Oh, thanks for leaving the note. I was slightly worried when you weren’t here” You say this as you’re still in your groggy stage of getting up. So you don’t even recognise that you just said you were worried about Goo.

Once you’re up and not feeling groggy, you look over at Goo. He’s just smiling. He’s not looking at the TV or his phone or anything in the apartment. He’s just smiling, so sheepishly that you’re intrigued to know what’s causing him to smile so much. But then Goo looks at you, still smiling.

You raise and eyebrow at him. In response Goo just shrugs his shoulders. You sigh and shake your head back and forth. Then after all the dramatical effects both of you have been doing to one another. You look at each other and just burst out laughing. None of you stop until you start wheezing and Goo starts snorting. But again, you both just look at each and laugh even harder.

This goes on for another 5 minutes, in which time, things only get funnier. Eventually after another few minutes, you stop. Both trying to catch a breath. You hadn’t laughed like that in so long, it was nice, this was nice. You think for a minute and discover that you’re calling this moment with Goo, nice, fun even. Wow, he’s really gotten under your skin these last few days.

Then you think back, back to when you both hated each other. Well, when you just hated Goo. After all, Goo never really hated you. He admitted that. You think back to the night in the study, how he was so close to your face when you first brought up the fake dating idea to him. You think about how your father reacted and how you defended Goo. Then how Goo reacted to you defending him. You think about how he let you in last night, bought you clothes and necessities that you would need. He even bought you extras, ‘just incase’.

Then you think about how you fell asleep together. How Goo kissed the back of your neck and wished you goodnight. How he left the note for you. How he was looking at you in the picture at the theme park and eventually your mind fell back to the time where Goo had kissed you. He kissed you to ‘prove’ your relationship wasn’t “fake”.

You smile at the thought of the kiss. At the thought that just a few days ago he kissed you and you felt disgusted and angry. Then you look at Goo, who’s just now caught his breath. You look at him and just think some more. You watch him. Then you smile. You’re smiling at everything that’s happened the last couple of days.

But what you’re really smiling about is the thought you just had. That thought being that you wouldn’t have wanted to go through this with Gun. I mean you hadn’t really thought about him at all these last couple of days, even though you’re doing all of this to get Gun’s attention. The irony. But the one person you were happy to go through this all with, is Goo.

Goo eventually catches his breath, then looks in your direction. You're already staring at him of course. But you’re not sure how to ask the questions you’re thinking of right now. And there’s A LOT.

“Goo” You eventually manage to say.

“Yes?” He says back with worry lacing through his voice.

“If I ask you some questions, can you give me the truth?” Goo raises a brow at you this time.

“Sure” He says. “I guess” You nod at his answer and then think. Then you think about how you’ve been doing a lot of that lately. But you inevitably have 1 main question in mind, so you know that that’ll be the last question you ask.

You sigh and close your eyes before looking back at Goo, preparing yourself for what’s to come and the answers he might give to you. Answers you’re not sure if you want to hear.

“Why did you agree to fake dating me?”

“Because I thought it would be fun” Goo answered the question, but why didn’t you feel satisfied by that answer?.

“Goo give me a better reason other than because you thought it would be fun” You say to him, trying to pry an actual answer out of him.

With this Goo sighs, looks away from you and then looks at you again. “You really want to know why?” Goo says, now questioning you.

“Yes, that would be nice”

“Fine. It’s because I didn’t want to say no to you. Actually, It’s because I couldn’t say no to you”

“What do you mean you couldn’t say no to me?” You question him again.

“To be honest, I’m not exactly sure about what I mean by it. Don’t get me wrong, I did think it would be a whole lot of fun doing this and annoying Gun. But there was just something, something in your eyes that I couldn’t say no to”

“Ok” You say. Somewhat happy, but also confused by that answer.

“Next question. Why do you have that picture of you, Gun and I in your bedroom?” Goo looks at you slightly taken aback by what you just asked. But then you think he realized that the picture wasn’t exactly hidden.

“That was just a memory. It was a fun day”

“Goo” You say because yet again, you feel like that isn’t the truth.

“Fine. Fine. I kept it because…well…it’s the only picture I have of…you” You just look at Goo, not sure what to say or what to do. Your lips part slightly as if you're about to speak again, but you can’t think of anything to say. Then you swallow hard at what he just said. He has that picture because it’s the only picture he has of you. YOU!. Wow, just wow. What do you even say to that? What can you even say to that?.

You eventually let out a shaky breath, hoping to calm your heart down slightly. “Ok, thanks for the honesty. I’ve just got a few more questions. That is if it’s ok?” Goo’s looking away from you now, but he nods to say yes.

“Ok. Then what about the ‘x’ on the note, why did you do that? Or kiss me on the neck and say goodnight? Why were you staring at me so intensely this morning?” You now had so many more questions, but you think that covers the few of the less visceral ones.

“That’s a lot of questions. But I’ll answer them all for you and I won’t try to spin the truth anymore, so here goes. I kissed the back of your neck last night because I wanted you to know I was there and that I was comfortable around you. I wanted you to feel comfortable around me as well because to me at least, you felt as though you were uncomfortable. I left you the ‘x’ on the note because I appreciated what you did for me and wanted to be kind. And as for me staring at you this morning. It all somewhat ties together with everything else I said” Goo sighs and then closes his eyes shut so tight that you can see the wrinkles on them. He looks at you again after opening them, not looking away from your eyes this time.

“The entire reason I was looking at you this morning was because we woke up so close together. Not just close together but face to face, our lips almost touching. The entire reason I was looking at you like that this morning, the entire reason I kissed the back of your neck last night and the entire reason why I left you that ‘x’ on the note was because the entire time that you’ve been here, in my apartment, when we’ve talked, when we’ve laughed, when we’ve argued was because I wanted to kiss you. I couldn’t do it last night because I was behind you and I knew you wouldn’t have liked nor wanted it. I knew when we woke that you wouldn’t want it and I knew that before I left here to handle some things for your dad, that you wouldn’t want it. That answer all your questions?”

You sit there completely stunned. Stunned to the point where you think you could be a statue. You couldn’t move, you couldn’t speak, you couldn’t even move your eyes. You just sat there. Goo looking straight ahead, right at you. You blink for the first time in what feels like years. Then you can somewhat move. But you still feel as though you can’t speak. You’re not even sure if you want to speak.

You both continue to just look at each other, not saying a word. Then, just like always, Goo breaks the silence.

“Any more questions?” With this, you eventually find your voice.

“Just one, maybe two more”

“Then ask away”

“Ok. Why didn’t you think I wouldn’t want you to kiss me?” Goo looks shocked at what you’ve just asked. But nevertheless, he answers.

“Because it’s me and not Gun who would be kissing you. I mean last night you told me that you thought we always hated each other. It was you who said we just never ‘clicked’” He was right of course. You did say all of that. So you just nod and you’re ready to move onto your last question, but before you can do that Goo jumps in.

“Since I've been answering all the questions. Answer a couple of mine before you ask me anymore”

“Ok. It’s only fair” You say back.

“Great. I expect the same honesty that I’ve given you” Goo says this so authoritatively, that you feel like your in a room with your father.

“Of course” You say back to him. Hoping that in any way, he will speak slightly softer.

“Good. So why are you here with me right now instead of Gun? I mean that’s who you really want to be with right?” The hope disappears from you quickly as you realize that Goo just became even more colder to you.

“Because I couldn’t go to him. I didn’t want to go to him. And even if I did go to him, he would have just told me that I’m not his problem or that I shouldn’t be there or he would have taken me back to my father. Sure I may have come to you because you were the easier option, but I liked being here with you. I like being with you. And as for who I want to be with right now. It’s not Gun, it’s you” Again you both just look at each other. But this time it’s Goo who could be mistaken for a statue.

“Ok, if that’s my questions finished with, then I have one more” Goo just nods, not saying a word.

“Do you like me?” This was the one question you didn’t want to ask, but you had to know the answer to. You had to know. You needed to know.

“Yes” Was the only word Goo could say and that answered all of your questions. That answered every thought that you could think of. There was just one more thing that you had to say to Goo for that night.

“Thank you for telling me the truth” Was the only thing you said before getting up. Goo watched you as you did so. His eyes were full of hurt and sadness. But you couldn’t let the feeling go that if you left, you would never see him again. Or that he wouldn’t want to see you again. So as you walked, you stopped in front of him and turned to face him.

“Goo” You said as softly as you could. “Can you stand up for me please, I think you’re sitting on my phone” He now looked so hurt. He looked so hurt that you cared more about your phone than him. But you think he cared more about the fact that you were leaving.

Sure enough though, Goo stood up. You walked behind him, grabbed your phone that he was in fact sitting on, slid it into the back pocket of your jeans and then turned back to face him. You didn’t say anything to him and he wasn’t even looking at you. So you thought and you decided to do one of the most impulsive things you’d ever done and probably would ever do.

Within a few seconds of you thinking about what you were about to do, you did it. You cupped Goo’s face in your hands and kissed him. Then you pulled away. Looking at him. The hurt and sadness had turned to shock and disbelief. So you did it again. When you pulled away this time, he still looked the same. So you did it one more time. This time when you did it, Goo snaked his arms around your waist and lifted you up. After your feet were back down on the ground and you had stopped kissing, you looked at Goo.

“I’m going to bed now” Was all you said. You weren’t sure why you said it but it confused you as much as it confused Goo. But the entire reason you think you said it was because you would have to admit something to yourself. You would have to admit that you were falling for Goo.

__________

You wake up the next morning with a cramp in your neck, probably from lying on the sofa at a weird angle. You slowly wake up and gaze at your surroundings, familiarizing yourself that you are still at Goo’s apartment.

You get up and do what can only be described as distracting yourself from thoughts of last night. You kissed Goo. Not because you had to but because you wanted to.

You get a cup of coffee, brush your teeth after and go in the shower. All while you’re still thinking about Goo. Goo this, Goo that. Until finally you think that it is Gun that you should be thinking about.

So you try to think about Gun, you think about all the fun times you had with him and how he gets you. Then as if clockwork, Goo jumps straight back into your thoughts as he descends the stairs.

“Hey” You say as casually as you can.

“Hi” Goo says back in a somewhat cold manner.

“How are you?” You ask him, trying to lighten up the conversation but to no avail.

“Mhm” Goo responds back. You can’t help but think your lack of ‘caring’ last night about this kiss and how cold you were after have something to do with this. But again, you try to converse with Goo.

“So, how did you sleep last night?” You ask.

“Good”

“Good, that’s…well good!” You say back, AGAIN trying to lighten the mood. But at this point you’re hoping that it’s just down to Goo waking up.

“Yup”

“Well coffee’s ready if you want a cup. I thought I should make you some, show you how thankful I am that you let me stay here these past few nights” You say to Goo.

“Thanks”

“No problem”

The room goes quiet after that. No conversations to be had and none that you wanted to start. So you go and sit down and start drinking your coffee in complete silence.

Goo joins you, but sits far away to the point that you know he is avoiding you in the best way he can. You just continue to drink your coffee and not chat until there’s a knock at the door.

You immediately look at the door, then to the clock that is sitting in the living room. 7:46am. Who can be here at 7:46am?. Until you hear the voice. His voice. Gun’s voice.

You don’t even have enough time to get up and go somewhere, let alone hide. Then Goo, as cool as a cucumber, just says “It’s open”.

You look at Goo, then look at the door which Gun is now standing in. Gun just looks at you and then to Goo.

“Told you she’s here. She’s been here for the past 2 nights” Goo says.

Taken aback by what Goo has just said, you look at him. He stares right back at you with a completely straight face. No hint of emotion present on it at all. No anger. No hurt. No surprise…no surprise.

“You called Gun” You say looking at Goo. But he doesn’t speak.

“YOU CALLED GUN” You say again this time raising your voice, as well as yourself off the sofa.

“Yes, Goo called me” Gun chimes in.

“I wasn’t asking you” You say back to Gun, not taking your eyes off of Goo.

“Yes, I called Gun” Goo eventually says.

You’re shocked at how casually this conversation is for him. How..normal it is that he’s called Gun to get you. Normal. Huh. You suppose it is normal for Gun to come and get you. But you didn’t think it would be Goo to call him first.

All you can do after thinking for a moment is to nod your head. You know what this is about and why it’s happened. But wasn’t it inevitable?. Wasn’t this how it was always going to be?. You would have to go back to your father’s house at some point, but you thought you might have had another night.

Another night to stay with Goo. To be around Goo. To sort out what had happened between you both. Your…feelings for Goo. But no. All because of a miscommunication that you caused, this is now a thing that’s happening.

Right here, right now - Gun is picking you up from Goo’s apartment, after Goo was the one to call him. Great, you think to yourself. Just great.

An hour later you and Gun are leaving Goo’s apartment. Goo has just sat, emotionless, while you’ve gathered the slight part of “your” things that were scattered around. After doing that and leaving the clothes Goo bought you, you go towards Gun.

“You’ve got everything?” Gun asks.

“Yes, now can we go” You say back to him, while looking at your feet because the fact is you can’t look at Goo. Not right now at least.

“Again, thank you for telling me where she was” Gun says back to Goo before leaving. But just as the door was closing you could see the smirk on Gun’s face and the slight look of despair on Goo’s.

__________

Another hour later and a silent car journey, you’re home. Back at your father’s house and Gun is waiting for you to get out.

“Thanks” You say to him, so coldly that even you think it is a bit mean.

“Why were you at Goo’s?” Gun asks out of nowhere, even though you were expecting it at least at some point. But now?.

“It doesn’t matter”

“Yes. Yes it does”

“Why does it matter?” You question.

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe because you said that you were at your friend's house for the past few days. Then, come to find out, you’re at Goo’s”

“Yup, I was in fact at Goo’s. Shocker now isn’t it?” You say back sarcastically.

“Really, that’s it. That’s the only explanation I’m getting?” Gun spits back at you.

“You're really expecting an explanation. Wow, we're a bit full of ourselves aren’t we?” You say back with even more sarcasm this time. But Gun just looks at you and smirks. He knows that he’s pushing your buttons and you’re also very much aware of what he is doing.

“I’m not, just curious that’s all” He eventually says back to you.

“Well can’t I hang out at my boyfriend's house?” You eventually say back, giving him a slight explanation. Gun then does something that you were not expecting. He starts laughing. Hysterically laughing.

“Oh come on. You really think Goo called me and didn’t mention your little deal with him, hm?” Just from that one sentence, your sense of reality shatters. Goo told Gun. Goo told Gun. Goo told Gun.

All you can think to do at this moment in time is to simply repeat that sentence. Over and over again, until probably on the 100th time, it sinks in. Goo told Gun about your deal. He told him the relationship was fake. That you were in fact, never in a relationship with Goo. Meaning that he must have told Gun about your feelings for him.

“So, what’s it going to be? Are you going to tell me the truth about everything orrr am I going to have to tell your father about your little outing?” Gun eventually speaks, drawing your mind back to reality that you lost only moments ago.

However, you can’t help but think with his choice of words that he might not know EVERYTHING. So you think carefully about what you say next because you certainly cannot have your father hearing about you staying at a guy's apartment, let alone Goo’s.

You collect your thoughts and process what little information you have and what information Gun has let slip. He knows the deal with Goo was a lie. He knows that your relationship with Goo was a lie. But he might not know that you had feelings for him. Ok.

“You want to know the truth? Well here it is” You pause before speaking to look straight at Gun and he’s now just looking straight back at you. His eyes are not wavering from yours and then you start off on your lies mixed with truth.

“Yes, I did fake a relationship with Goo. Why? I’m not sure, call it boredom and to see what you might think and wow did that work. The look on your face when we actually kissed, comical” You stop there for a brief moment. Gun’s eyes are still glued to your own but you can now see that the ever familiar smirk has been wiped from his lips.

“To be completely honest with you, I really do wish I had a framed picture of that moment. It was amazing. But as for why I was at Goo’s house. Let me think. Oh, yes, that’s right, when you thought Goo and I actually were in a relationship, you ran straight to my father and then I needed space. So I went out for a walk, ended up in Seoul and long behold it started to rain. I wandered about a little while, trying to find an umbrella, but you know how it is.Then I ran to the subway”

Again you stop, taking in what you’ve said and by the look and Gun’s face Goo definitely didn’t tell him about how you had feeling for him. And now you're hoping he also didn’t tell Gun about anything else.

“Now let me finish the story, since you are SOOO interested. After running down to the subway, every single message on the board said delayed. So that’s when I decided to stay somewhere for the night. I didn’t think it would be appropriate to just turn up at anyone’s doorstep given the circumstance, so that’s when I remembered that Goo stayed nearby. I called my father, explained that I needed some time away and then made my way to his apartment. Oh yeah, thanks for the information on where he lived, it was really useful even though I never expected to be going there at any given moment of my life. But it worked out nicely. So I made my way over, found the building, went in, went up in the elevator and found his obnoxious door and hey presto, it was Goo’s apartment. I stayed there for 2 nights and then you came to collect me no more than, oh 2 and a half hours ago now”

You eventually stop speaking after having said everything and you feel accomplished. You’ve said everything you wanted to say, lie or truth. You’ve shut down Gun and you’ve wiped the smirk off his face. You’ve also avoided your father from finding out and you’ve avoided a lecture. So yes, right now you feel very accomplished.

Now you’re just waiting for Gun to say something back to you. But he doesn’t. He’s just sitting in silence, now not even looking at you. He’s just gripping the steering wheel and you can see that his knuckles have turned white with just how tightly he’s gripping it.

You can only think to yourself about what he has to say and that’s the worrying part. You’re not sure what he will have to say about everything. Sure, you have told him everything that happened, leaving out a few parts. But in the back of your mind your thoughts are still nagging at you that he still might know. That he might know everything. You need Gun to speak so you know, for certain, that he doesn’t know everything.

“Well then, I suppose that’s all of my question and further questions answered. Apart from one. Why is it that you and Goo, I’m assuming, were getting on like a so-called ‘house on fire’ until today. What exactly happened, huh?”

Of all the questions that Gun could have asked, this one wasn’t high on your list for ones that you wanted to answer. But you were going to do so anyway to avoid any arguments or lectures later down the line.

“Well, if you must know, we had an argument last night. Nothing in particular just a spat, so to speak” You say, assuming this is enough for Gun. But of course it isn’t.

“An argument about what?” He asks.

“Oh you know, he didn’t like the way that my toothbrush touched his. Regular things when you’re living with someone” You say sarcastically, hoping that Gun won’t press on. But of course, that doesn’t happen.

“I’m being serious here. What was the argument about?”

“Like I said, it was about a toothbrush” You say again. Gun just looks at you unimpressed with your retort and asks again.

“What was it about?”

“Fine, you really want to know what it was about?” You question.

“Preferably, yes. It would save me telling your father and dim my curiosity” Gun says sarcastically this time.

“Fine. If you want to know that badly then here’s the truth. We kissed last night, well I kissed him because that was all I could think to do. Then after I pulled away I said that I was going to bed. Are you happy now you know the truth?”

Gun just looks at you, eyes wide, his grip on the steering wheel even tighter than before, as if he’s the one that has a reason to be angry. But he does, you just didn’t know it then.

_________

It’s been 3 weeks since you have been back home. 3 weeks since Gun had dropped you back off at your father’s home. 3 weeks since your arguments with both Goo and Gun and 3 weeks since you’ve spoken to either of them.

You don’t know what to think. You don’t know what to do, but you are grateful to Gun. He kept his word and didn’t say anything to your father when you came back and the weeks that followed.

But you’re not happy that neither of them has spoken to you. But you can’t blame them either. You’re just upset and that’s fine, you’ll get over it. But nevertheless, it still hurts to know that you messed up what is probably the two people you were closest to.

But in the past 3 weeks, you’ve also realized something. You’ve realized that in the almost 5 days that you spent with Goo meant something to you. You were too scared to admit it before, but now you’re not scared to. You caught feelings for Goo. But even with everything that went on with Gun, you still have feelings for him as well. How selfish.

But you decided that you were not going to pity yourself. So you have text them both, but with no luck. You apologize to Goo about what you said and asked him if you could both talk. He left you on read.

As for Gun, you’re not entirely sure what you did but you suppose that hanging out with Goo, who you can only describe as Gun “best friend” and admitting that you kissed him had something to do with it. You’ve also text him, but again with no luck.

You’ve also realized how selfish it was to have done the whole fake dating thing with Goo. So when you came back from Goo’s apartment and arrived after Gun had dropped you off. You went to your father and told him everything about fake dating Goo and that Gun was wrong about your relationship with him. But you still stand by what you said. You didn’t mention anything else though.

Either way, with everything you’ve realized over the past 3 weeks, you feel better about yourself. You’ve figured out that putting people against one another or using someone to your advantage to get someone else, might not be a good idea. Ever.

But you are excited for today. After 3 weeks you are going to see Gun and Goo today. But what you’re not excited for is their reactions of seeing you again, because you’re not entirely sure how they’re going to react. All you can do is hope it’s going to go well.

3 hours later and 2 coffees in your system, you’re ready and waiting for both of them along with your father in his office. You can’t remember the last time that your palms were this sweaty over seeing someone. You suppose it was when your father told you that you would be meeting your bodyguard for the first time, the irony. 10 or so minutes later, they both arrive. Your father greets them both first with a ‘Hello’ and then it’s your turn to speak.

“Hi” You say as calmly as you can, speaking to both of them.

“Hi” Goo says back.

“Hi, how have you both been?” Gun asks.

“I’ve been better” You say.

“Well then, let’s see if we can change that” Your father says, interjecting into the conversation. You just look at him and smile at him trying to be thoughtful and funny. All you can think is just how ‘funny’ doesn’t suit your father in the slightest.

Goo and Gun both take their seats as your father starts the meeting with all 3 of you present. He’s just going over the usual overviews of his business and from starting again today, you will have Gun as your bodyguard again. Goo as his.

Once everything is said and done. Instruction clear. Everything worked out. Your father makes a hasty exit to answer a call and you’re left alone with both Goo and Gun.

“So how have you both been?” You ask, curious as to how they both have been. But also trying to ease some of the residual tension in the room.

“Great” Goo replies hastily, as if not wanting to have a conversation with you.

“Good” Gun replies in a slightly less cold manner than Goo.

“Well I suppose starting again today you’re both back as mine and my father’s bodyguards” You say, pointing out the obvious. But you cannot think of anything else to say. The tension now is almost unbearable. You could probably cut it with a knife.

“Yes” Goo and Gun say at the same time.

“Look, can we just stop this. I know it’s blatantly obvious but I fucked up. On both accounts I fucked up. I didn’t mean to practically put the both of you against one another, but I did. I really am sorry about that and for everything else. So can we maybe…try to act like we all used to. Like the both of you used to” You say eventually because you couldn’t take the pressure in the room any longer.

“And how did we both act before?” Gun asks.

“That’s a hard question to answer. But I suppose you acted like, well, friends, but more so friends at a push. And it’s a very big push” You say, trying to bring back your sarcasm along with a potential laugh from one of them. But to no success.

“We were never friends” Goo says matter-of-factly and Gun nods in support of what Goo has just said.

“Ok, so not friends. Got it. But how about co-workers?. That works right. I mean you’re both going to be around one another a lot again. So why not try to get along like how you both used to?” You say.

“That wouldn’t work. Not anymore” Goo says.

“I agree. That wouldn’t work” Gun then says.

You just sigh at both of them. In the last 3 weeks you haven’t seen both of them. You also forgot that it’s a losing game to argue with them. It must have also slipped your mind that they are like cats and dogs. They can be around one another, but they will never get on with one another.

While thinking about all of this. Goo gets up to leave and because you have been meaning to talk to both Goo and Gun 1 on 1. Assuming they want to as well. You quickly yell Goo’s name. Maybe a little too loudly.

“Yes?” Goo says in surprise.

“Sorry that was a bit loud. Could I talk to you for a minute or two?. Would that be ok?” You ask.

“Sure, I guess” Goo says, letting out a sigh after he finished speaking.

“Great. Also Gun could you wait here for however long this takes?. I was hoping I could talk to you as well” You ask Gun.

“Sure” Gun replies back.

You nod at Gun. Giving him a silent thank you and then make your way towards the door where Goo is standing with his arms folded across his chest.

“Ok, well we’ll be talking in the kitchen if you need me for anything before that” You say back to Gun just as you’re pushing the door open and walking out with Goo.

You walk into the kitchen with Goo trudging behind you. Just judging by his attitude today, he’s more prickly than usual. Meaning that if you say something that might set him off, or even just in general, he’s going to lay into you one way or another. Great, you think to yourself. But to be honest, with the way that you left his apartment and how you treated him beforehand, you can’t blame him.

“So” You say, trying to ease your way into things.

“How have you really been?” You say again because it’s the only thing you can think of.

“Like I said, I've been great” Goo says again.

“Ok, well that’s good. I’m glad” You say, trying to lighten the mood before you inevitably ruin it again.

“Ok. Let’s cut to the chase and get this over with. I’m sorry. Really, really sorry for how things went” You say eventually just giving in.

“You’re sorry about what exactly?” Goo says back to you and now you can tell he’s getting angry. But you can also tell that with the way you left things, he’s hurt.

“I’m sorry about, well, everything. I’m sorry that I came running to you. I’m sorry that I stayed longer than one night. I’m sorry about asking all those question” You pause for a second not wanting to say the last few sentences, but you know you have to. You know you have to because if not the guilt and hurt that you’ve put Goo through would eat away at you.

“And I’m sorry for saying what I said, after I kissed you. And..and I’m sorry for kissing you. It shouldn’t have happened. I’m just so, so sorry” You say. The hurt and sorrow in your voice is so present to you, that you didn’t think you were the one actually speaking. You didn’t think that everything you said and done with Goo affected you this much. You didn’t think it hurt you this much.

“You’re right. It should have never happened. None of it should have ever happened” Goo says, agreeing with every point in one fail swoop.

“Yeah. It shouldn’t have. But…” You pause, not sure if you should finish what you were saying.

“But what?” Goo says, now slightly intrigued as to what you were going to say.

“But I’m..I’m glad it did” You say eventually. With as much authority as you can muster.

Goo just stares at you. Unsure of what to say or do. You’re the exact same. You don’t know if it was a good idea to say everything you were thinking, but you’re hoping it was. The staring game between you and Goo continues for another few seconds before Goo looks away.

“You’re glad everything happened?. I mean everything. Are you serious!?. You kissed me out of nowhere and then said you were going to bed and your GLAD that happened?. Fuck you. Seriously, fuck you” Goo says before he storms out or even gives you a chance to explain. But you’re not going to run after him. You’re sure you’ll be able to talk to him at some other point and be able to clear everything up. But for right now, you have to let him cool off.

__________

You make your way back to your father’s office. Where you find Gun is still sitting in his chair waiting for you to arrive back.

“Hi” You say, trying not to startle him. But it’s Gun, you don’t think anything could startle him.

“Have a fun chat with Goo then?” Gun asks.

“You could say that, but no. It was more a conversation we needed to have, but it was left unfinished” You say back.

“Ok. So why did you want to talk to me?” Gun asks curiously.

“Well I figured that since we haven't talked in 3 weeks and I feel like you’re mad at me. That we needed to have this talk” You say back, getting straight to the point again.

“I’m not mad” Gun says back to you.

“Yes you are”

“No, I’m not” Gun says again. This time a lot more stern sounding.

“Gun I’ve known you for years, I know when you’re mad. But if you say you’re not made, then you’re upset. So my question is why?” Gun lets out a sigh to your observation.

“Ok I suppose I’m a little upset. But I’m not mad” He eventually says back.

“Ok not mad, just upset. Got it. But why?” You ask.

“Goo” Is all Gun answers with.

“Goo?” You say back, questioning him. You think it’s because they have both had an argument with one another, which is why they also acted more coldly to one another today.

“Yes, Goo” Gun says.

“Elaboration?” You ask. Again unsure of what he means.

“You and Goo. That’s why I’m upset” Gun says back. You have to take a second to register what he’s just said. You and Goo. Wait, YOU and GOO?. Gun’s not upset because he had an argument with Goo. He’s upset because he’s jealous. But just for clarification, you have to ask him because if you don’t, you know you will never get a straight answer from him.

“You're jealous then?”

“Yes” Gun says straightforwardly. Your eyes go wide because of what he’s just said. But at the back of your mind, you know that this is what you wanted. This was the entire reason that you started to fake date Goo. This. Everything about this. You wanted to happen. But now, you don’t. You know that much like you had just done with Goo, you had to come clean about everything. For your own piece of mind, as well as Gun’s you had to.

“Look” You say, gearing yourself up for what’s about to unfold.

“I have to be honest with you on this one Gun. You know how 3 weeks ago I told you ‘everything’?” You say and Gun nods his head.

“Well, I might have been lying. But only about a few things. I was also really bitchy, so I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry about lying as well. And I’ll tell you the truth, if you want to hear it?” You say, unsure about how he will take it. But also unsure about how he will take another piece of news.

“By all means, pretell” Gun says.

“Ok. So I was telling the truth about everything, bar one thing. The entire situation played out exactly like I said it did. It rained. I ran down to the subway and every train was delayed. I called my father. I didn’t want to go to a friend's house, so I went to Goo’s. I stayed a few nights. I kissed him and then said I was going to bed. All of that is the truth” You say and Gun nods.

“But what I wasn’t being entirely honest about was the reason for fake dating Goo” Gun nods again, but is curious as to your explanation because he’s now leaning forward in the chair. Ready to hear what you have to say.

“The truth is that I asked Goo to fake date me to make you jealous because I liked you” There, you think. The truth. It’s out now, no taking it back.

“Huh. Well can’t say I saw that coming. But I do appreciate the honesty”

“Why, thank you” You say sarcastically. Feeling a weight lift off your chest.

“But, I also can’t help the fact that you said ‘liked’ me. Past tense” Gun says and your eyes shoot up.

“Huh?”

“You said you liked me. Again, past tense. So you don’t like me anymore?” Gun questions.

“I. I don’t know. Honestly, I don’t” You say back to Gun surprised that you even said liked. I mean you did still like him, right?. It was only just this morning that you liked both Goo and Gun. But since having that conversation with Goo, you can’t help but think about him.

“Now I'll tell you the truth” Gun says, breaking you out of your thoughts.

“The truth is that I don’t see very many people in a romantic way. I’m sure you’ve gathered that which is why you pulled this stunt, right?” You nod in clarification of his statement.

“Well, that day when I came to get you from Goo’s house I was fine because he told me all about your little scheme. Leaving out a few bits and pieces. But either way when we were in the car and you said that you kissed Goo. I was pissed. That’s when I thought to myself that I may feel something for you. And I did in fact get jealous. When you told me there that you did all of this to get my attention, I was relieved. But then I heard you say liked” You continue to nod, not knowing what to say to any of this. But Gun continues.

“Now I’ll be completely honest with you. You have to admit to yourself that even though you liked me. You don’t like me anymore. With every little petty thing I've done like tell your father about you and Goo. And be snarky about collecting you from Goo’s. You don’t like me anymore. But I also have to admit to myself that in those instances I was jealous. But again. You have to admit to yourself that you don’t like me anymore, It’s Goo you like. Not me. Not after everything” Gun says this and it hits you like a pile of bricks.

All this time, since he talked to your father. He’s been jealous. Which is what you wanted. But now looking back, it made him look like a dick and you hated him for it. That’s when you went running to Goo. That was when your feelings for Goo came from. All this time, you thought you still liked Gun. But really after everything. Especially seeing and talking to both of them today. You’ve realized after Gun’s lecture. That you don’t like Gun anymore. It’s Goo that you have feelings for. It’s Goo that you like.

__________

“I like Goo” You say out loud.

“I like Goo” You say out loud again, confirming your feelings.

You then look at Gun, who has a slightly faded smile on his face. You can feel the small amount of pain he feels emanating from him and then you say a quiet ‘sorry’ because you feel guilty, so so guilty about all of this.

You now know that you’ve caused all of this. Every single thing that you’ve done has caused all this pain, all this hurt and you would do anything to change it. But it’s too late now to go back in time and do that, it’s happened and you just have to find a way to fix it.

So, while Gun and yourself are still in your dad’s office, you both sit quietly. You concocting a plan to undo all of this and Gun sitting patiently, waiting and then getting ready to listen to what you have to come up with. You finally hatch an idea. One that you think will have the best outcome on everyone's part.

“Well” You say to Gun.

“Well” Gun says back to you.

“I think I have an idea”

“Hopefully it’s nothing like the last one” Gun says back in a sarcastic manner, smiling while he says it.

“Ha ha, very funny. But no it’s definitely not like the last one” You say back reassuringly.

“Thank god for that. So what is it?.” Gun questions.

“Well, firstly, given the fact that it had you and Goo in it to begin with, I don’t want that to happen again. Unless you’re okay with it” You say back to Gun, awaiting his response.

“Look, as much as last time was a complete fuck up for you, in your so called ‘plan’. I’m fine with helping you this time” Gun says.

“After all, contrary to popular belief, I do want to see you happy. And if that means being with Goo of all people, then I’ll help you” Gun finally says.

You look at Gun and smile with his words. But then what he has just said about Goo click and you start laughing. Gun then joins in and soon you are both laughing with one another.

“Thank you” You say after eventually calming yourself down. “Seriously, thank you” Gun nods at your response and you can’t help but feel like this is reminiscent of so called ‘old times’ you used to spend with him. The exception being that there is a lot more talking going on and he’s not just nodding this time around.

“So, what’s the plan?” Gun questions.

“Well, I was thinking that you could go over to his house and talk to him for a little while. Say it’s for work. Slip in a few questions about him and I…us and see how he reacts” You say back answering his question.

“Hmmm” Gun says back in retaliation to the plan.

“Why the hmmm?” You ask.

“Well won’t that be a bit suspicious?”

“Suspicious?. I mean slightly, but even then you could just say some bullshit like you always do and voila, case closed” You say back to him.

Gun just looks at you with a questioning look. “You think I can just bullshit my way through a conversation?” He finally asks.

“Yes, yes I do and you’re pretty good at it” You say back to him with a smile on your face and then again, you both burst into laughter.

“So, what comes after the plan?” Gun asks.

“Well, that part I haven’t exactly figured out yet. But I was thinking that I would give him a week or so to cool down and then talk to him. And my father, about maybe…the possibility of a serious, well, relationship with Goo” Gun looks at you and then smiles back at your answer.

“Aww, getting all sappy now are we?” Gun says back mockingly.

“No” You say firmly “But you did ask didn’t you?. And well, after everything. Mostly with you making me admit that I have feelings for Goo, I actually don’t think it would be a bad thing if we gave things a go. That is if he doesn’t hate me for everything”

Gun just smirks at what you’re saying. But you can tell he isn’t hurt, he is just genuinely happy that you and his well, rival, best friend in some weird way, whatever they are. You can tell he is just happy for you both and that makes you happy as well.

“So, when are you going to talk to your father about all of this?” Gun asks.

“Now that, I’m not sure about. I’m also not sure how he will take it or how he will take the whole, you know” You stop talking and then Gun interjects.

“Fake dating thing?” Gun says finishing your sentence for you.

“Yeah. The whole fake dating thing” You sigh at the end of it, with how much damage you have caused with this entire idea. God, how stupid you are. But you will put it right. You have to put it right in order to get Goo back.

Gun pulls you from your thoughts when he speaks and you almost jump with how startled you are by it. “Your father will be fine with everything, I mean he has to be. Wait, does he not even know that you and Goo ‘broke up’” All you can do is shake your head to his question.

“Well then, I really want to watch that conversation play out” Gun says with yet another smirk on his face. “Oh trust me, I would much rather you be there. But alas, you have a very touchy conversation with Goo to have. Well you are having that conversation on my behalf, but still” You say back, mimicking his sarcasm and adding a smirk onto your face for an extra touch.

Gun just looks at you, unimpressed. But you just look at Gun and mouth the words ‘thank you’ to him. You realize at that moment that neither of you want to breach the silence that has fallen upon the conversation. But it isn’t the type of silence that is awkward, it’s just comforting to you both at this minute. The silence that you both used to have. The silence you used to have before everything became such a mess and you’re glad it’s happening right now, because you know that with this silence again, that everything with you and Gun will be okay.

__________

It has been a couple of days since your conversation with Gun. Since then you have gotten your hair done to try to feel better and to help with your nerves, but it hasn’t worked in the slightest. But today is the day that you are going to tell your father about everything. Every. Single. Thing.

You have tried to prepare yourself for the inevitable conversation. You’ve come up with so many different outcomes. You’ve come up with how the conversation will start and end. You’ve come up with how you’re even going to lead into the topic of everything, but each time it just makes you more nervous.

You made sure a few days ago that your father would be free when you went to talk to him. But since then, you really have been trying to mentally prepare yourself, to no avail though. So as you’re walking down the hallway getting ready to enter his office, you freeze just outside the door and take one final deep breath in to attempt to calm your nerves and much like you figured it would, it has not helped.

“Hi dad” You say as you enter his office.

“Hi” He says back in his firm but yet fatherly voice.

“So what is it that you wanted?” He asks.

“Well, about that” You pause for a moment and he raises his eyebrows at you curiously.

“It’s about…well, there's a lot I want to talk to you about” You finally say and with that, you now have his full undivided attention on you.

“Go on” He says, making you more nervous.

“Okay. So you umm..well you remember that Goo and I were dating right?”

“Yes”

“Well, that wasn’t exactly true” You say to him while looking down at your hands fiddling with your fingers.

“Go on” You eventually hear back.

“You know what, it’s a long story. It can wait for another time. Sorry to bother you” You say back to him, too nervous and scared to tell him that truth. But as you go to stand up, he stands first. You remain seated until he walks around his desk, takes a chair and pulls it over to where you are sat. Instinctively, you turn your chair towards him.

Then suddenly he smiles at you and takes your hands. You always forget that the man sitting in front of you is your father, since he is always so strict and firm with everyone else. But in every other term, he is your father. So now with this, you feel a lot more at ease with telling him.

“Go on” He says to you.

“Well, the entire thing with Goo and I was fake. We never really dated, at all. It only came into fruition the night of your event actually. The truth is that I came up with this plan” You pause there, preparing yourself for what you’re about to say.

“Plan?” Your father eventually asks after a long, drawn out pause from you.

“Yes, a plan. The thing is that before that night, I had liked Gun for so many years. Too many now that I think about it. But he just intrigued me so much. So that night I asked Goo to have a conversation with me and in that conversation I told him the plan that I wanted to put into place. I told him that I wanted us to fake date in order to make Gun jealous” As you’ve just admitted all of this your father is sat in the other chair nodding and taking everything in. So given that it is going somewhat well in your eyes so far, you continue.

“So, that night Gun came into the room. Found Goo and I and because Goo is well…Goo, he decided to have a little fun and play along. So he told Gun that we had been going out for some time and then we kissed to prove it. The very next day, that is when we had our conversation. Then I went out, walked about for a little while and got trapped in the center of Seoul. Everything I said on the phone that night was true, apart from where I was staying” You inhale a deep breath but you can already tell that your father has figured out where this is going.

“You stayed at Goo’s house?” He asks. You nod in response.

“Can I ask why you lied?”

“Well, the truth is that I didn’t think it would be appropriate to show up at one of my friends' doors and ask to stay the night on such short notice, soaking wet, cold and not having anything to wear for the next day. So I guess, well I figured that since Goo was then the closest person to the area that I would walk to his apartment and hope to god that he would answer the door. And it’s also because I didn’t want to come home that night. I really just needed time to cool down and digest everything. I mean it was a small lie, a stupid plan and then you found out and reacted how you did. I just couldn’t be around it. I’m so sorry” You say.

Your father squeezes your hand in reassurance that he isn’t angry with you, not in the least. But you still feel so guilty for lying to him.

“So, what happened after?” He questions you again.

“I went, knocked on his door and he was there. He let me in. I showered and he came back with some stuff for me. I mean he was really sweet in the entire thing. After that we drank some wine, had a conversation and then went to bed”

“Is there more?” “A hell of a lot more, yes. The next day I called you, remember?” Your father nods in response. “Everything I said on the call was true. I did need some more space from you but I just lied about where I was. Then as the day went on everything was fine. But then Goo left to go do a job for you and he left a note. It had an ‘x’ at the bottom of it and he had this picture when we were at the theme park. I fell asleep that day and when he came back I woke up, we had this entire conversation about everything and it kinda ended in me kissing him and then the only thing I could say after that was ‘I’m going to bed’” You stop and try to catch your breath. It didn’t register how fast you were talking just then and with everything you just revealed to your father, you don’t want to stop there. So just as fast as you assume you stopped speaking, you start again.

“After that, the next day he called Gun to come and get me. Gun brought me back and had a few words to say to me. They both were so pissed off at me about everything. So then 3 weeks went by, no texts, no calls, no communication whatsoever with any of them. Then 3 days ago now we had that meeting and everything kind of came to a head. I had a conversation with Goo and he flipped out on me because I really hurt him. Then he left. After that I had a conversation with Gun and I found out that my plan worked. But he made me realize that by that point, it wasn’t him that I liked, it was Goo. So now we have this entire other plan of him trying to talk to Goo and slip things in about me and that I have no idea on my end what to do. But I wanted to tell you. I wanted to be honest with you because I don’t want to mess up again. I really like Goo and I just don’t want to mess up”

Now everything is out in the open. You have no clue how your father is going to react to your confession but you’re hoping he isn’t too mad at anyone involved.

“That’s quite the story. One hell of a story actually. One that I didn’t expect. But I'm glad you told me. And if you’re wondering, I'm not mad at you” You look up after he says this and all of a sudden you feel your nausea fade away. You hadn’t registered just how ill you were feeling until this very moment. But then it had faded away and you felt better.

Your father then stands up and puts the chair back in it’s place and then stands in front of you. A tell tale sign that he wants you to do the same and so you do. Suddenly, you are engulfed in a hug. And you hug him back just as tightly as he is hugging you.

“All I have to say is, thank you for telling me the truth. And if you do like Goo as much as I think you do, don’t fuck it up this time if you get another chance” With that being said and your father letting you go. You make a swift exit and go back to your room to decide on a plan of what’s to come. A plan that you’re hoping will work.

__________

A few days after the conversation with your father, you have filled Gun in on the plan that you hope will go well and today is the day it will come into play. Still sticking to the original plan, Gun will go around and talk to Goo, throwing in a few questions about yourself in the process. Then Gun will ask Goo to a dinner to discuss what your father had said previously when all 3 of you had the meeting about 5 days ago and you will show up in his place. Hopefully everything will go well and then you can discuss everything with Goo, resulting in a happy ending.

But since this morning you have been frantically pacing about your room, thinking about everything. You have called Gun about 2 times already to make sure he’s aware of what he needs to do and both times he has responded with ‘I know the plan, don’t worry’. Now you’re onto texting him. But you haven’t received a reply back and that’s worrying you.

20 minutes of pacing later you hear the signature *ding* of your phone. You run and grab it from your bed and it is a text from Gun.

*I’ve just arrived. Don’t worry, everything will be fine, it's just like we went over. I’ll let you know how it goes.*

*Okay.* is the only thing you can respond with given how anxious you are. Now with that it’s just a waiting game to see how everything plays out.

“Well” Gun says, stepping into Goo’s apartment. “How has everything been”

“Amazing” Goo replies rather nastily.

“As pleasant as always I can tell”

“Ha ha, very funny. Now just sit down so we can get this over and done with” Gun obliges to the somewhat command-like comment and sits.

“So, what did you want to go over?” Goo says with a still rather hateful tone in his voice and Gun can’t distinguish whether it’s from his presence or because of you.

“Firstly, why the dick attitude of yours?. I mean you’re always a dick, but amazingly enough, this is a whole other level” Gun asks curiously.

“Oh fuck off, this is how I normally am. Can’t you tell?” Goo replies back, now even more aggravated.

“Mhm. So this little attitude of yours wouldn’t have anything to do with you know who?” Goo just scoffs.

“No it doesn’t have anything to do with her if you must know”

“Right. So no bitter feeling, no pining for her, nothing of that sort going on right now?” Gun asks, attempting to make Goo more annoyed because he knows this is the best way to get answers out of him.

“Again. NO” Goo shouts the last part.

“Wow, touchy. But even in saying no, it’s a yes. Got it”

“You know what, fuck off if you’re going to be like that”

“Be like what?” Gun replies, acting oblivious.

“Oh I don’t know. Curious, nosey, intrusive or just sticking your nose somewhere it doesn’t belong” Goo retorts back.

“Right. So you are upset then. God I couldn’t tell”

“Oh fuck off. I mean seriously, you would be too”

“Trust me, given what I’ve heard from her and the entire little plan that she concocted, yeah I’m pissed. But seriously the thing she did to you, that’s just laughable” Gun says tauntingly.

“Right and you’ve hear everything”

“That’s right” Gun replies back calmly. Goo turns around at this and raises his eyebrows, not needing to ask the question ‘seriously?’ for Gun to understand what he was going to say. So Gun just nods.

“Well then. Looks like you guys are happy again”

“Were friends again if that’s what you mean”

“Right…friends” Goo replies back, now getting agitated.

“You seem bothered. Want to tell me why?” Gun says, provoking Goo even more.

Then after a few seconds, Gun sees a glass flying towards his head and after that Goo goes in for a punch. They have a small scuffle on the floor for a good few minutes, both landing punches on one another until Goo finally stops and stands. Gun does the same and they both wipe themselves down before sitting on the sofa.

“This is bullshit” Goo says. “All of this is fucking bullshit”

“Clarification?” Gun asks curiously.

“Her and me. Me and her. God, it’s bullshit. Bullshit. Bullshit. Bullshit”

“Aww so you are upset” Gun mocks. Goo just looks at him for a moment before taking in his surroundings and Gun assumes he doesn’t want to break his expensive furniture.

“Look just fuck off, I’m not in the mood” Goo says back.

“Listen. I don’t really care all that much. But, for what it’s worth. She is sorry” Gun says as he stands up to leave.

But as he walks towards the door and reaches for the handle Goo suddenly asks something.

“Really?”

“Yeah”

“Also what happened to talking about the meeting?” Goo questions.

“We can go over it another time. Clearly, you’re not in the right headspace” And with that Gun leaves Goo’s apartment.

Another *ding* on your phone makes you jump as you have just sat down to think about everything for the millionth time. It’s from Gun again. Much like last time you open it at lightning speed.

*Half the plan worked. Very well actually. The other half, not so much*

*What do you mean by half?. What half.* You reply back.

*Dinner didn’t work out. I didn’t even ask. But he is pissed about you and everything you have done. Like seriously, a little provoking and we were having a small fight on the floor.*

*What?.*

*Seriously. He is pissed*

*Also, if you ask me again to go back over there, my answer is no. I am NOT putting up with him again. At least not until it’s necessary.*

*Got it. Thank you for doing half of the plan though. But what should I do now?.* You ask.

*Talk to him.*

And with that you are left bewildered. Goo doesn’t want to talk to you and from what Gun has just texted you he’s so pissed off that he’s willing to throw punches.

A few hours of deliberating later and you still have no idea what to do. Clearly he’s annoyed and hurt and you're pretty sure you’re the last person he wants to see or even hear from right now. So you decide to leave it. Wait for everything to settle down and then you will try to talk to him.

__________

Another few weeks have passed. Now this marks almost a month of not speaking to Goo. Even now you’re still not sure what to do. Since the day that everything came to a head, you’ve seen him a handful of times. Always leaving your father’s office after a meeting and once in the kitchen making a coffee. You didn’t even attempt to talk to him and you’re sure he hadn’t even acknowledged your presence.

Much like when you tried to put the plan into place with Gun, you continue to berate him about what you should do. It always ends with him saying ‘talk to him’. But you can’t bring yourself to do that.

Now after a few days since the last meeting and talking to your father about everything else that has happened. Your father has told you that Goo will be over in a few hours since he needs to speak to him again, this time on his own. You just replied with an ‘okay’ and told him that you’ll stay out their way. Mostly meaning Goo.

After the few hours are over with, you assume that everything is said and done and that Goo has left. So you go downstairs to find your father.

“DAD” You scream, waiting to hear a response back so you can go to it. But, nothing.

“DAD” You scream again, this time trying to be as loud as possible. But still, nothing. You’re about to scream a third time before you hear a voice shout from the kitchen.

“He’s not here”

It’s Goo. Wait, what is Goo doing here, he should be gone by now. You question to yourself. But nonetheless you go to the kitchen because you have a few questions. Such as ‘Where is my dad?’.

As you enter the kitchen. Sure enough, sat on a stool, you see Goo. You furrow your eyebrows questioningly and then walk towards him.

“So, why are you here? I thought you left” You ask Goo, not expecting a reply.

“Your father. Said he was going away for a few hours. Gun’s out on a job and your father wanted someone to watch you” Goo replies, answering all your questions in one go.

“Great” You reply back coldly. Then with that, the room falls silent again. So you go and make yourself a coffee while you're here. You grab the kettle, fill it up, place it back down and click it so it starts to boil. Then you turn around, fold your arms across your chest and lean against the counter, just staring at Goo.

Suddenly, Goo looks up and straight at you. Making you freeze for a moment. But then he climbs off his stool and starts walking over to you. All of a sudden your eyes grow wide and you feel your heartbeat quicken in pace.

Then in a swift flash, Goo is stood in front of you. He then reaches towards you and instinctively you close your eyes. Then suddenly you hear a cupboard door open and some sort of plate being taken out. You open your eyes again and Goo is leaning over you with a bowl in hand. Suddenly he looks down at you and speaks.

“Can you move, I need a spoon”

You blink for a moment before moving and now you’re trying to hold your tongue. But you can’t for much longer after he grabs a spoon and heads back.

“Seriously, are you still this pissed off?” You ask him annoyed.

“Annoyed?. Annoyed about what?.” Goo asks unbothered.

“Seriously?” You question.

“Yes, seriously”

“You really are such a dick, you know that right?”

“Oh, so I’m a dick now?” Goo replies back angrily.

“Yes. I mean seriously. I let you cool down, I didn’t talk to you given the circumstances and the only words that you say to me is first why my dad left and then you say ‘can you move, I need a spoon’. I mean what the fuck, really?” You say back, now getting angry yourself.

“Oh I’m every so very sorry princess” Goo says back tauntingly.

“You know how much I hate that nickname, so stop fucking using it”

By this point you don’t notice that Goo has put down the bowl and spoon. You also don’t conceive the fact that you have slowly been moving closer to Goo, who is just standing round at the opposite side of the counter. And within a few seconds you are face to face screaming at one another.

This goes on for a few minutes before you eventually just scream out something that halts Goo in his tracks.

“At least I wasn't fighting with Gun because I couldn’t handle how hurt or even jealous I was” All of a sudden, silence. You both look at each other and then you step back and look down. You feel bad that you’ve just admitted to knowing about what Gun and Goo had talked about. But you also just crossed a line by assuming things.

“How do you know about that?” Goo asks.

“Who do you think, Gun told me. I kinda asked him to tell me what you talked about if I came up in conversation” There’s a long pause before either of you speak again, but just as you do there’s a click. It’s the front door.

“Anyone here?” It’s Gun who’s just arrived.

“In here” Goo shouts back.

Once Gun walks into the kitchen and sees both you and Goo almost face to face he smirks and then asks rather snarkily “Lovers quarrel?” with a smirk on his face. With that you look at both of them, completely ignoring the fact that you wanted coffee and head back up to your room. You then hear the door slam and an engine start. You can tell it’s Goo’s car and then it fades away as it grows silent again.

About 10 minutes later footsteps come up the stairs and then there is a knock at your door. Begrudgingly you answer it and it’s Gun.

“What do you want?” You ask annoyed.

“Sorry” Gun says. You sigh at this and let him in, he just goes and sits on the bed.

“It’s fine, I just overreacted a little”

“I mean yes, you did. But what was that, with you and Goo?”

“We had an argument”

“Oh. So you’re talking now”

“No. Definitely not talking”

“Okay, sure. Anyways, I'm not staying here” “But what about my dad?” You ask.

“Just tell him that Goo left a couple of minutes before he got back” Gun retorts.

“Sure thing”

Then with that Gun leaves and you hear a click from the front door locking and another car engine starts and you hear it slowly fade. Then you’re alone. You think about everything that has just happened and how much it has hurt you. *Ding*. You pick up your phone assuming that it is Gun who is texting you until you read the name. *Piss head*. It’s Goo. You open the text quickly and read it.

*Sorry for the argument. Can you come to my apartment tomorrow, we need to talk*

Now your head is really spinning.

*Sure*

Is your reply and then you prepare yourself for tomorrow.

__________

You could barely sleep last night because you were thinking about the text from Goo. Your anxiety crept up on you when you were about to go to sleep then suddenly all you thought about was Goo. What does he want?. Is it a good thing or a bad thing?. God, even now you’re a nervous wreck thinking about it. But you leave at 2pm and your Gun will drive you.

You told your dad about everything when he got in and he nodded along as you were telling him. But when he walked into his office you saw a smile set across his face. Clearly he’s happy for you but doesn’t want to admit it.

You check the time quickly to see how long you have until you get picked up by Gun. Suddenly you realize you overslept and it’s 1pm. Where did the time go and why didn’t you hear your alarms is all you ask yourself before you’re rushing to find an outfit and shower.

After showering and doing all the necessary things like brushing your teeth and hair, putting on your clothes. You check the time again and suddenly you hear a car horn. 1:49pm. That will be Gun. You got ready just in time you think and now you’re off to go and see Goo.

You walk outside and get in Gun’s car. Clipping in your seatbelt as soon as you sit down, then the anxiety wears away and the nausea hits. You really wish you had taken some sort of pain meds before you left. Maybe they would have dulled down the ill feeling in your stomach.

“You good?” Gun asks.

“I feel like I’m going to throw up” You say back to him. He leans over, opens the glove compartment and then there is some medication. You look at him, smile and then reach for the medication. Popping out 2 pills while Gun hands you his half drunk bottle of water, but you don’t care. You just want to take these and hope everything goes well.

“So, nervous I take it”

“How could you tell?” You ask back sarcastically.

“Oh you know, this and that”

“Ha ha” You respond back. Then there's a jolt and suddenly you recognize that Gun has started driving.

“Do you by any chance know what he wants?” You ask Gun, hoping for a best case scenario where he knows everything.

“Not a single idea”

“God. Why couldn’t you know something” You almost whine this out.

“Just have to go in blind”

“You know I hate not having even a slight inkling into what’s about to occur. So frankly, this is my worst nightmare playing out”

“Such a shame. I would pity you if it wasn’t slightly funny” Gun says back now stifling back laughter.

“Such an ass” You retort back and that makes Gun laugh.

The drive isn’t long but it is silent after you almost threw up after going over a speed bump. Then you arrive at Goo’s apartment. You let out a deep sight before looking over at Gun and giving him a not then getting out. Closing the door behind you, you look up and feel the irony in the situation.

You wait for Gun to leave and then walk towards the entrance. Once you’re in the lobby you make your way to the elevator and step inside. You remember the floor number this time, press it and wait as it slowly climbs up the floors. It’s so slow that it’s almost painful as it climbs up. Then it stops and the doors open.

You let out another sigh before exiting the elevator and walking to Goo’s door. You wait for a minute before you ask yourself again why you’re here or what are you doing. But you can’t be bothered to fight it anymore and give in. Recognising you’re already here, you know you can’t turn back and so you knock on Goo’s door and wait for an answer.

Suddenly the door opens and Goo appears in front. He moves out the way and motion with his hand to come in and sure enough you walk in.

“Sorry” He says.

“About what?” You ask.

“About yesterday”

“Just about yesterday?” You ask him.

“No, not just about yesterday” You just nod as he talks.

“Well at least you’re speaking to me now”

“I could say the same thing about you” Goo says back.

“Well, I thought you wouldn’t want to talk to me”

“And why is that?” Goo questions.

“I mean, given everything, I think you understand why” Goo nods as you say this but then you see a smile come across his face.

“I you really want to know, I’m glad we’re talking again”

“Me too”

You both sit for an hour or two talking about this and that, but you know sooner or later that you will have to have a serious talk about what really happened between you both. But before that Goo gets up and asks if you want a pizza and you nod vigorously and say yes.

It’s about 6pm by the time the pizza gets there and you both stop talking to eat. You get the plates and Goo brings out wine again. Then you start to reminisce on the night that Goo said ‘what if i’ve never hated you’ and then you look at him for a moment, happy and content, pouring out wine for you both with an ordered in pizza sat in front of you both.

You place the plates down. Take your seat and then Goo hands you the wine. You think before taking a sip and then place it down, thinking about the conversations to come and you want to be sober for it. You both eat and drink and then after it’s finished, you take the plate and clean them while Goo dries the dishes. You aren’t saying a word to one another, you aren’t even looking at each other, but yet you can tell that both of you feel so content.

And so once everything is done and before you sit back down on the sofa you tell Goo that you have to make a call or 2. The first person you call is your father, telling him that you won’t be back tonight and that you’re planning on staying over at Goo’s talking. He doesn’t like the idea, but he’s not going to stop you, after being so truthful to him this past week. Then you call Gun, explaining the situation and trying to be questioned so much by him. But even through the phone you can feel the ever growing smirk on his face and then you hang up and everything is dealt with.

Then again, you start to reminisce on how similar this is to how you first got to talking. The phone calls you made, staying overnight, having wine and then having conversations that turned into something so deep that not even you, yourself imagined it would. At least not with Goo. But here you are again, you think to yourself. Back in the same position, just without the storm and wet clothes.

You go over and sit back down beside Goo. Letting out another sigh before you have to face the music and the conversations that will happen. But first you feel like you should let him know that you may or may not have told both your father and Gun that you will more than likely stay over tonight without mentioning it to the apartment's owner.

“ Goo” You say.

“What’s up”

“Do you mind if I stay tonight?”

“Why?”

“Well, I kind of canceled my ride and told my dad I would be staying over here because we do have a lot to talk about” You answer back.

“That is true. So, are we going to get started on the talks or are we just going to keep tiptoeing around it?” Goo asks suddenly.

“Well, let’s start” You say back to him.

“Great” He says.

“So. Why the shouting match yesterday and how did you get Gun to tell you about the conversation and fight that he and I had?”

“The shouting match was because you were a dick. A month of no conversation and then tell me to move because you need a spoon. I mean seriously Goo a SPOON?” You say rather annoyedly.

“But as for how I found out about the conversation, I may have set up another plan with Gun this time to try and get you to talk to me again..”

“You did what?” Goo asks surprised.

“Yeah..I asked him if he would come over here and talk about the meeting we had a few weeks back. Then I asked him if maybe, just maybe he could slip in a few questions about me and see how that goes. But I swear all he told me was that you were annoyed and jealous and all you went on about was me, then there was a fight and overall from what I gathered, it was a mess” “Well you’re right about that. It was a complete mess”

“Yeah. I figured as much” You say, laughing slightly.

“But as for everything else. It’s also true what he said. I mean I was so pissed off about everything, but mainly about you that even when he came in here I had an attitude on me” Goo says.

“Well. That’s slightly comforting to know. But still I absolutely hate myself for what happened between us. Well between all 3 of us. But mainly you and I” You say suddenly. Goo then looks at you for a moment before seeing that you are telling the truth.

“Really?” He asks, almost unsure what to think.

“Yes really. I regret that entire plan of making Gun jealous. I regret how I put you two against one another and I regret hurting you in the process of my own selfish actions”

“Good to hear. But what about what you said in the kitchen that day that we talked, the day of the meeting?” Goo asks.

“Well truth be told I still stand by exactly what I said. I’m glad everything happened like that between us, but at the time I wasn’t entirely sure why until I had a conversation with Gun after you left”

“And what conversation would that be?” Goo asks curiously.

“Well I told him about everything. The fake dating plan. Me wanting to go out with him, blah, blah, blah. You know the deal by now. But what really got me was when I said I liked Gun and Gun pointed that out. Going on to say a little monologue about how he did see me as a potential partner, this and that and then he said that I don’t feel the same way anymore because he was a complete dick” At this Goo tilts his head curious as to what you mean.

“What I mean is that he pointed out that I didn’t like him and I hadn’t liked him since coming back from this apartment. Your apartment” You say to Goo. He goes silent for a moment and then the pieces click in his head.

“Hold on. Let me get this straight. You mean to say that you liked Gun for years and once you actually got him jealous and he started becoming a dick, you didn’t like him anymore” Goo asks almost as a confirmation.

“Yes” You say.

“Then once I called Gun to pick you up and drag you back, even after everything that happened. You didn’t like him anymore?”

“Yes” You say again.

“And what’s more is that you and Gun had a conversation where you said you liked him and he pointed it out and then what?. You realized that it was..” Goo stops before continuing, not wanting to be wrong in what he is assuming.

“Yes. At that moment when I said that to Gun and he pointed it out saying a few certain things, it clicked. It clicked to me why I said that I was going to bed instead of kissing you again and again or even staying up and talking until the sun came up. It’s because I like you Goo and don’t ask me why because I don’t know. I have absolutely no clue. But yes. I like you” You finally say. Confirming everything that Goo was thinking. Or at least you're hoping so.

Goo stops for what feels like a few hours and then he just looks at you, until he breaks his eye contact. Then he looks at the glass of wine and drinks it all down in one. You’re trying not to smile at this because it’s so funny it's almost comedic. But then after only a minute he speaks.

“I’m so sorry i’ve been such a fucking dick. You were right. This entire time I have been a dick and what’s more I hate myself for it. But Gun was also right in saying that I was jealous when he came here that day. That’s why I started a fight with him because I thought that he would win you over and I just didn’t want to see that happen. But at the same time I didn’t want to talk to you because I was pissed. So fucking pissed. But now…” Goo just stops speaking and looks at you. Smiling from ear to ear like an idiot. All you can do though is do the exact same thing back and then the laughter happens.

You both laugh for 15 minutes. You’re crying from it and Goo is doubled over holding his stomach from it cramping up from laughing so hard and then you eventually stop and wait for Goo to do the same. After he does stop laughing, you both just look at each other and then Goo stands up. You do the same, except you move towards him and once you’re close enough to him, you wrap your arms around him, hugging him.

He hugs you back and you stay like that for a good few minutes. Neither of you wanting to be the first to let go. But then Goo is the first one to break the connection, but in the best way possible. He cups your cheeks and kisses you and you kiss him back. You pull away and kiss each other again and again. Eventually you get slightly tired and so by that point you break away from him and say.

“I’m tired right now. So I’m going to go to bed” With that being said you both burst into laughter at how stupid you both are. All these plans and misunderstanding and yet with a simple conversation, everything was solved.

Goo runs up to his bedroom and brings down a shirt and sweatpants for you to wear and you go and get changed. When you come out of the bathroom he is lying on the sofa the exact same way he was when you first slept over that one fateful night. And so you crawl into his arms and he throws the blanket over you. Kissing you on the back of the neck goodnight.

You wake up the next morning happy as can be. Then before you know it one night turns into two, two turns into three and three turns into a week. Until four months later you have a few boxes left to move that Gun is helping you with. Then you will officially have moved into Goo’s apartment.

“Well looks like you’re moving in” Goo says sarcastically.

“Wasn’t that always the plan?” You say sarcastically back to Goo, with a smile on your face.

“I guess it might have been” Goo says, moving over to you and hugging you as you put the last box down. You smile up at Goo and then see that he is dangling something in his hand.

“Your house keys princess” Go says with a smirk on his face. Meanwhile you know you look unimpressed with that nickname. But it has grown on you over these past few months.

“Great” You say. “I’ll be taking those '' As you take the keys out of Goo’s hand. You look up at him after taking them and smile again. Goo then leans down and kisses you and you kiss him back.

“I love you” Goo says to you.

“I love you too” You say back to Goo.

#lookism headcanons #lookism hc #lookism #lookism x reader #goo kim x reader #goo lookism #lookism goo #kim joongoo x reader #kim joongoo #goo kim #lookism fic #lookism fanfic #lookism webtoon #lookism manhwa #manhwa #webtoon #gun park #park jonggun

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mymegumi · 1 year

Text

I FUCKED UP, OH GIRL I KNOW ও MICHAEL KAISER

cw — toxic/manipulative relationship

the two of you just could never seem to stay away from each other

“c’mon, baby,” kaiser’s voice filters through the door, sweet and lilting as he speaks to you, “don’t be like this. ‘m here to apologize.”

“fuck off.”

you can barely hear kaiser’s laugh through the door and the sound of him knocking again. “baby, don’t you wanna see what i got you?”

you pause. just as you were about to walk away from the door and resolve to ignore kaiser for the rest of the day, he does what he does best—sinks his claws into you.

from the moment you’ve met him, you and kaiser have circled each other like planets in orbit. never was there a moment when you weren’t on his lap at a party or he was at your side when you called for him. as if magnetized to him, you tried to be as close as possible. alike as you were, even magnets push away from each other.

pulling open the door, kaiser is standing in front of you in a plain pair of jeans and a white t-shirt. there’s golden rings dotting his fingers and the thin white gold chain hangs around his neck as it always does. his tattoo peeks through his shirt and there’s a cocky smile on his lips, infuriating enough it almost makes you shut the door in his face again.

almost.

“are those roses?” the question comes out unbelieving.

for all the times the two of you have argued, kaiser has never bought you flowers. usually you’d ignore each other for a few days before one of you would end up texting each other again.

kaiser’s smirk turns sweet and he nods, holding the hand out that’s occupied with flowers. there’s a bit of a shake in his hand, and you think you can see him shifting from side to side, almost nervous. but you can’t be right, because kaiser has never shown you a side of him that wasn’t overconfident, conceited or even downright unbearable. he was practically made of walls, never letting them down for anything.

“can we go back to how things were now?” his tone is mildly pleading and you purse your lips as you take the flowers from his outstretched hand. “i miss you.”

“missing my birthday was fucked up.” you furrow your brow and cross your arms across your chest, as if trying to keep your emotions from spilling out to him. inviting kaiser to a small birthday celebration was hard for you, and for him to not even text you ‘happy birthday’ and miss the party was just a slap across the face.

he sighs, free hand now pushing his hair from his face. “i fucked up, baby, and i’m sorry. i’ll be better and it’ll never happen again. let me make it up to you.”

if you had a nickel for every time he said he’d change, you’d be rich beyond words—and if he had a nickel for every time you took him back, he’d be just as rich.

holding out your arms for a hug, you sigh softly as he envelops you. his scent is just as piercing as the day you met him and you bury your face in his shoulder.

“i missed you.” he murmurs it against your hair, and you know he means it.

there was no you without kaiser and there was no kaiser without you. it didn’t matter what he did or what he promised, at the end of the day, you ended up in each others arms.

“i know.”

#michael kaiser x you #michael kaiser x reader #michael kaiser x y/n #kaiser x you #kaiser x reader #kaiser x y/n #bllk x you #bllk x reader #bllk x y/n #kaiser drabble #michael kaiser drabble #michael kaiser #kaiser bllk #txt!writing

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sillygoose067 · 2 months

Text

Over the 7 Seas

Ch.11

Charles Leclerc x Reader

Author’s Note: the fluff really starts hitting here. I felt the butterflies in my stomach writing this— because hey, a girl can dream, can’t she? Honestly, I think this is pretty light in terms of what I have in store, so hang on tight!

You nod shyly and your hands brush together before you both finally intertwine fingers. You look away with a soft smile and a blush. Charles asks you if you want to take his car to the restaurant or walk. “I’d like to walk, if you don’t mind. Monaco is full of so many beautiful sights”, you respond and he smiles at you with a satisfied look in his eyes. Everyone always saw Monaco for its wealth and splendor, but no one really took the time to appreciate its beautiful culture and people. In Charles’ eyes, so far, you had checked every box (and maybe even added some) he had classified as green flags.

As you walk through the block and avidly discuss Charles’s career, you feel his thumb brush over your knuckles and feel a wave of affection for this man that you’ve barely known for a week. Either he was a really good player, or he was truly a gentleman who knew how to treat women right. You opted to believe the latter.

Noticing that you’ve spaced out a little bit, he brings you back gently. “Have I told you how beautiful you look right now?”

Escaping your reverie, you bounce back this time. “And have I told you how absolutely gorgeous you look today?”, you counter. You slap a hand over your mouth with wide eyes and your head snaps toward him in shock. You are appalled by this sudden lack of “feminine grace”.

“I’m so sorry”, you apologize profusely as he stares at you with wide eyes, mouth hanging open, and a faint blush painting his cheeks. You’d stopped walking out of shock and were staring at each other. “I am sooo sorry”, you say again. “I’ve really done it now, huh? No wonder no one ever wanted me…”, you say sadly.

This makes Charles recover, and he struggles to regain his ability to speak. “Non non, ma Chéri! Don’t think that! I was just surprised.” “No one has ever called me gorgeous, so I was just caught a little off-guard. B-But I liked it!” he blushes a deeper shade of pink. He grabs your chin and lifts your face to look up at him gently. “I think I would like you to let loose like that more often”.

When your eyes meet his hesitantly, he raises his eyebrows in question, asking if you’ve understood. You nod and he grasps your hand once again and you resume your walk to the restaurant.

…

Before you enter the restaurant, Charles pulls you aside. “Y/n, I need to clear some things with you before anything becomes too serious”. He takes a deep breath. “Because I’m an F1 driver, and I don’t mean to sound conceited, but, people tend to follow me around and capture every little thing about my life to post on the media”. He lets out a frustrated huff. “And often, this was the reason why my past partners left me. They couldn’t handle the constant spotlight and paparazzi. I don’t blame them, really, but it hurt knowing that my career made them leave the relationship”. Charles brushes his thumb over your knuckles again and looks at you. “I just want to give you an out before we’re too invested. I understand it can be a lot to take”. This time, he’s the one ready for rejection.

Feeling fearless, you reach up and cup his face, brushing your thumb along his cheekbone. He leans into your touch. “Thank you, Charles. But I think I’m enough of a big girl to handle these kinds of situations”, you say softly. “With a mom who was extremely well-known in the community, I grew up with somewhat of a spotlight myself. I know how to handle things when they get complicated”, you reassure him. “I also think that if we want to make this work, we need to disregard what other people think. If we do become a couple, we mustn’t let others define our relationship– Then it wouldn’t be OUR relationship, don’t you think?”

Charles hums appreciatively. “When did you have time to collect all this wisdom, hmm?”.

You make a move toward the entrance of the restaurant, but he pulls you back to him into a hug. You freeze, but reciprocate nonetheless. “Merci, ma Chéri. Truly”

#f1 #formula 1 #smut #fluff #f1 x reader #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader

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bettsfic · 2 months

Note

Hi betts! I’ve been looking up to a lot of your posts for tips on how to structure a story, but i find that when it comes to writing a short story for a fanfic i’m a bit lost. I guess i find it hard to condense conflict and tension into a short story that is mostly about small moments between the characters that i want to write about, but i suppose if i don’t follow a certain structure it might not be that compelling?

short form is the wild west, my friend. the shorter the form, the fewer structural conceits there seem to be. but also, if something's short, you don't really have to worry about it being compelling, or freytag's pyramid, or a climax and resolution or anything like that. i mean you can if you want, but a short piece offers an experience, that's all. like looking at a painting. you don't worry about a painting being narratively compelling; it's only beautiful. you witness it, engage with it. allow it to move you. and you move on.

also "small moments between the characters" sounds like a mosaic sort of story made up of small vignettes. that's a fun and totally valid method of storytelling. so i would stick with that, gluing all your pieces together in different ways and seeing what kind of image it makes.

#writing advice #short form #structure

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abcdegcf · 2 years

Text

Watermelon Sugar.

It's clear to Jeon Jungkook — you consider him the bane of your existence but boy he'd do anything to have a taste even if it means possibly getting caught in your university building's library and have both of you expelled.

Word count? 2K

Genre? Smut, porn without plot, enemies to friends w/ benefits to lovers (Fem. College Student Reader x Fuckboy Jungkook)

Contents and/or warnings? Public (library) sex, explicit language, vaginal fingering, oral (f. receiving), a bit of face fucking, cum eating, spitting

Author's note? Just in case anyone's wondering and found this rather familiar, this was previously posted in my old account. I added a few stuff here and there but nothing much changed. For those who haven't read this one, hope you guys like it. Also, would you guys want a second part? Let me know by sending an ask, I'd appreciate your feedback and such.

"Do it," you challenge the guy in front of you, crossing your arms. "I dare you."

It’s supposed to be a typical Friday afternoon. After classes, you’d spend an hour or so at the college library to finish some assignments, look through the thousands of books, mind your own business at the quiet halls then head straight home. Getting sidetracked by human interactions is the least of your worries, knowing that all of your closest friends attend different colleges — hence, you barely spend time outside the privacy of your room besides the college building. You should be fine in your second year... right?

The answer's probably not.

Because Jeon Jungkook decided to ruin your daily routine by starting an argument over your love for space exploration —that he believes is an utter bullshit— much to your chagrin. His whole conceited demeanor changed when he takes notice of the lip balm you’ve had clenched in your fist, an idea coming up to his mind.

"Don’t mind if I do," a smirk appears on his face, taking a few steps closer to you.

Of course, you’ve seen it coming — the expression on his face and his body language says it all. But it’s all so sudden when he grabs you by the hips, pulling you closer to him. The lip balm in your hand drops to the floor and is completely forgotten as he grabs your chin, closing the gap between the two of you. Your heart starts pounding whilst he keeps his eyes on you. You can barely form coherent thoughts, your main focus is on his lips — hoping he’d get the signal to kiss you.

Thinking that he isn't going to do anything unless you do the first move, you throw your last bit of shame out of the window and take his hand onto your lips before kissing his knuckles. Trailing kisses on his palm then onto the back of his hand, you hear a hum of approval. In an effort to seduce him —as if what you’re doing isn’t enough— you take one of his fingers and start sucking it into your mouth, looking straight at him.

Jungkook swallows the lump in his throat before planting a kiss on the slope of your neck. Coincidence or not, he’s hit the specific spot. It’s enough for your breath to hitch in your throat. You hastily drag his hand down to lift your skirt up a bit. You feel his lips smirk against your neck when his hand’s finally underneath your underwear, stroking your wet pussy.

Just when you think it’s finally happening, he almost immediately pulls his hand away from where you need him the most and leans his forehead onto yours. "Are you sure you want this? That you won't regret doing this?"

What he does next surprises you — he brushes your hair away from your eyes before kissing your forehead. "Tell me, Y/N. Do you really want this?"

It's what your closest friends would call "the bare minimum" but coming from Jungkook, it's enough send butterflies in your stomach — as cringe-y as it sounds.

Whatever happened to the annoying person who confidently said they want a taste of your lips?

"Just do what you have to do," you breathe out, almost sounding like a whimper.

You hear him chuckle. "You're so fucking cute and needy for me, huh?"

He doesn’t give you that much time to think of a comeback, pressing his lips against yours. Your back hits the bookshelf behind you as you fold your arms around his neck, combing your fingers through his hair. You feel the hand on your neck cradle the back of your head, pulling you as close as possible. His smooth tongue toys with your lips, invading your mouth as you sear each other with hot, passionate kisses.

"Your lips taste so fucking good," he says in between kisses.

Soft moans escape from both of your lips, filling the quiet corner of the library. "Want me to eat you out? Make you feel good?"

He doesn’t even let you answer as he already knows what it is, capturing your lips again with his.

You pull away from the kiss. "Jeon, we can’t do this here."

"Where do you want to do this then?" he asks you, caressing your waist and you can’t help but admire the tattoos on his arm. You may dislike him but he's a lot of things other than the fact that he's fucked loads of people — one being he's a tattoo artist and apparently, he really is passionate about it.

"Y/N, baby. Where do you want to do this?" Jungkook asks again, snapping you out of your thoughts. "I'm not going to do anything unless you're comfortable."

Your dorm room? Definitely not, he’s going to get himself kicked out before he can take one step inside. Restroom? No way in hell you’re going to enter the men’s restroom nor let him enter the women’s restroom. An empty classroom? You doubt there’s a single one that’s unlocked. Running out of options, you decide to take the risk.

"Fuck it, let’s just do it here."

Jungkook kneels down, looking up at you. "You have to be quiet though."

You scoff. "I find it quite an easy task— shit!"

Almost immediately, you cover your mouth with your hand when he presses a gentle kiss on your clothed pussy. His hands have found their way on your bare thighs, thumb brushing against your skin. You shift above him, feeling the anticipation of having his tongue against your core coming in.

He senses your impatience, a mischievous grin sliding onto his lips. "So you’re saying?"

"Asshole," you mutter to yourself. "Can't you shut up and just do it?"

"I’m doing you a favor here—

Before he can even finish his sentence, you’ve already knitted your fingers in his hair to tug him towards where you need him the most. "For goodness sake — just shut up, Jeon."

You try to look around to make sure no one’s suspicious of the noise you two have been making. Luckily, you’re in the Reference Section of the library that barely anyone walks through. It’s a perfect spot for people like you who can’t contain their hormones.

Jungkook doesn’t give you much time to think as he cups your heat with his hand to feel your wetness soaking through the fabric. You bite into your finger to suppress further noises escape your lips, watching him slide his fingers into the waistband of your underwear to pull it down onto the ground. You mindlessly spread your legs for him.

He looks up at you, a cocky smile plastered on his face. "You’re already this wet?"

Not wanting to hear another word from you, he starts teasingly sliding his two fingers up and down your slit. It’s enough to make you shudder, the feeling of his fingers’ already too much for you. You feel one of his fingers poke your entrance but before you can signal him to move, he finally pushes it inside you as his mouth starts working on your clit.

"Put one more," you manage to breathe out as you tug on his hair harder, your face and neck already covered with light layers of sweat.

You feel his lips smirk against your wet core before he slowly pushes another finger in, making you gasp loudly. He abruptly stops his movements, looking up at you. He’s never seen you this flustered, chest rising and falling with your pussy all wet and glistening for him. Usually, you’d have this stern look on your face before he can even say a word to you.

"I thought shutting up is an easy task for you?"

As much as you want to slap that stupid grin away from his face, you’re too preoccupied to even bother think about a comeback. Slowly thrusting his fingers in and out, you arch your back from the shelf while holding on to his hair.

"Do you want it faster, Y/N?" he asks, before licking a bold stripe from your entrance up to your clit.

He expects you not to give in that easily but you nod, whimpering at the sensation. "Please Jeon, just please."

"Well, that was easy," he teases before he starts fucking your hole faster with his fingers, producing lewd and wet noises.

You watch him as he flicks his warm tongue against your clit before sucking it, curling his fingers inside of you at the same time. Pushing him closer to your dripping pussy, you lift one of your legs to rest your foot on his shoulder for support. He would’ve been annoyed at you for laying your dirty shoe on his white polo but this position’s giving him more room for his tongue so who’s he to complain?

"Jungkook— fuck," you pant.

He smirks against your core, loving the fact that he’s making you feel good enough for you to call him by his name. Not Jeon. Not even asshole nor jerk. You called him Jungkook.

"You like that, Y/N?" he moans against your pussy, the vibration making your insides turn from the immense pleasure. He keeps the drilling pace of your pussy, feeling you clench around his fingers to signal your high. Not to keep you waiting, he continues to wrap his lips around your clit — sucking on it while flicking his tongue around with no intention of stopping.

It doesn’t take that long for you to feel your body giving up on you, legs shaking from pleasure as your head falls back.

"Are you gonna come for me, baby?" he presses his thumb on your clit, rubbing it roughly as you start rocking your hips against him.

You can only moan in response, forgetting about the fact that you're inside the university library where anyone can hear you. "That’s right, come for me."

As much as you want to slap that smirk out of his face when he called you by a pet name (that you hate, if you may add), you badly need to come.

"Holy shit," you drag out as you spill everything on his fingers and mouth.

Jungkook doesn’t waste time to stand up, keeping your juices inside his mouth. Cupping your cheeks, you almost immediately knew what he’s going to do. You part your lips open as he spits your cum into your mouth, not letting a single drop spill down your chin. "You’re so fucking hot."

If both of you weren't in such a risky situation that could get both of you expelled if he doesn't do it quick, he would’ve taken his precious time to look at your fucked out expression but he needs more. He wants more. Just as he’s about to unbuckle his belt, you’ve already pulled up your underwear before you start wiping your sweat off with the back of your hands.

He furrows his eyebrows in confusion, placing his hands on the sides of his waist. "You’re leaving?"

"Yeah," you casually say as if the person that you believe you dislike so much didn't eat you out. You grab your backpack from the ground, slinging it onto your shoulder. "Do you have a problem with that?"

He looks at you in disbelief, pointing at the obvious bulge on his pants. "You’re going to leave me with this?"

"You can handle it on your own, can’t you?" A cheeky smile escapes your lips.

Turning around to walk away from the clearly disappointed Jungkook, you suddenly hear him call out to your name. "Not even a helping hand?"

You stop in your tracks to face him again. "I’m not the type to return a favor, Jeon." And now you’re back with the last name basis.

"You’ve had your taste, that’s all you’re going to get."

Jungkook can only smile to himself. He'd be lying if he says he didn't think it would end up this way — he wouldn't be bothering you if you were an easy catch. Poking the side of his cheek with his tongue, he thinks of another way to annoy the hell out of you. He sure is the bane of your existence but one thing's for sure — you'll be coming back for more.

#jeon jungkook smut #jungkook smut #bts jungkook smut #bts smut

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harrygoeswest · 1 year

Photo

Trigger Warnings: sweary sweary language

Word count: 11,184

Chapters twelve, thirteen & fourteen

fifteen

I hadn’t felt like this for a very long time. The last time I felt even a fraction this happy, and this content, was when I was with Rico. And somehow this was different; this was better.

Harry and I had been drifting in and out of consciousness since we finished. He was laying on his back, one arm behind his head and the other stroking up and down the length of my spine. I was nestled against his side, my head on his chest and my right leg hooked over his. I always knew when he was unconscious because his arm stopped moving and his breath grew heavier; it didn’t tickle when he exhaled.

The next time he woke, his hand travelled a little lower, and he began kneading into my bum with no strategy whatsoever.

I looked up at him, my chin resting on his pectoral. He peeled an eye open, his kneading pausing.

“You don’t like it?”

“No, I do.”

He nodded once and carried on, closing his eyes again.

It was late now. I had no idea what time it was but absolutely nothing could be heard outside - not the wind, not a car, nor a cow. I could barely hear the river, either. It was unusual, even for this sleepy village.

“I owe you an apology, actually.”

Harry frowned, opening both eyes now. “For what?”

“You had a blind date a couple of months ago, right?”

His eyes widened. “Yeah… How did you know that?”

I pointed at myself. “Was supposed to be with me.”

His brow furrowed furiously, all movements having stopped. I wasn’t sure if he was upset or confused.

“I don’t understand.”

“Well, I turned up, realised Zara had tried to set me up with you, and immediately left.”

Harry studied my face for a moment, eyes flicking over me. A smirk was forming on his mouth and it perplexed me. “You stood me up?”

I pressed my lips into a tight, guilty line. “Yeah…”

“That’s interesting.” He mumbled.

“Why?”

“Because I spent that whole evening in the pub with a different girl.”

I pulled back a little. “I beg your pardon?”

He laughed, hand back to gliding over the expanse of my back. “Another girl genuinely turned up claiming to be my date.”

My mouth fell. “Who?!”

“I can’t remember her name… She was kinda petite, dark hair in a long ponytail, spoke with an inflection at the end of every sentence.”

“Spoke with a what?”

“You know when people make their voice go up? At the end of every sentence? So it sounds like they’re always asking a question?” He did exactly what he was referring to in his own speech.

I giggled, annoyingly amused by him. “Right okay. I don’t know who she is, though.”

“Well anyway, as far as I was concerned she was my blind date. I had no idea someone else had already had the audacity to stand me up.”

“Sorry.” I mumbled, resting my chin back down.

“Why did you leave when you saw it was me?”

“Same reason I’ve always left. Couldn’t face embarrassing myself in front of you.”

Harry took a deep breath, and he stroked over my hair with a doughy gaze. “Imagine how much quicker we could’ve done this if you weren’t such a wimp.”

I smacked his chest and scowled at him. “Don’t be so fucking rude.”

“Look - I already fancied you a little bit at that point. If you’d have stayed for the date instead of running away I’d have been right chuffed.”

“Yeah right did you already fancy me.” I scoffed.

“I did!”

“Rubbish.”

“I promise you I did.”

“For what reason?” I demanded.

“Because you’re beautiful!” He said with exasperation. “Nuttiness aside you’re fuckin’ gorgeous, Florence, any man would be an idiot not to think so.”

I was still frowning. “Well now you’re just being superstitious.”

“I think you mean superficial.”

“Whatever.” I hid my face against his chest.

“And if anything I was being conceited, but it’s still true. That day you walked into the practice for the first time was unforgettable.”

“That’s because I made a complete and utter arse of myself.”

“No,” He started, and then decided to go back on himself, “well, maybe a little bit. But I did also think you were incredibly pretty.”

“I was a mess.”

“Yeah, but like a sexy mess.”

I whined loudly. “Shut up.”

“I like that you’re always covered in grease and oil. Shows how hard you work.”

“Alright, you can stop now. I’d just really like to know who the fuck you were on a date with and how they even knew.”

“Who else knew about the date?”

“No one. Just Geri and Zara but they’re not gonna have a second person lined up, are they?”

“Well, they might.”

I looked at him with a scowl.

Harry laughed. “I’m joking, Floss. You must’ve told someone else.”

I thought about it for a while. “No. Only the host lady person at the pub. I asked her to tell you I was sick.”

“Oh, it gets better and better.”

“I panicked, alright?”

He looked at me and shook his head. “You left me to be mortified. In a pub alone.”

“Well apparently you had a queue of other women waiting for you so it wasn’t that bad.”

Harry cackled towards the ceiling and tightened his grip around me. “Alright, alright, alright.”

I watched him for a moment. He closed his eyes again but continued trailing his fingers up and down my back.

“Did you sleep with her?”

Harry’s movements paused, and admittedly I was startled by my own question. “Yeah, all night. Couldn’t leave her alone.”

I narrowed my gaze. “Glad you had a good night after all.”

He chuckled and shook me a little bit. “I didn’t sleep with her, Florence. I made an excuse to go home after an hour because she wouldn’t stop talking about politicians that are allegedly lizards.”

“Interesting…”

“It wasn’t.”

I watched him a little more, delighted by the content look on his face. I don’t know how long I stared at him before I fell asleep, and I can’t remember if he stopped his tracing before or after my eyes dropped closed, but we both drifted off eventually, and I forgot to set an alarm.

I was sitting in the office with my head in my hands when my phone started ringing, and I nearly jumped out of my skin.

Harry and I woke up that morning with a jump scare because I didn’t set an alarm and we’d had a particularly late night. The time on the clock when I looked over was nearly 10:30. I didn’t get to work until after 11. There was a queue of angry customers wondering why I wasn’t open and I had to make up some bullshit excuse about having to go and get some ‘emergency parts’ from Cheltenham.

Because I started nearly 3 hours late I had to make up the time I lost by staying 3 hours late, too. By 8 o’clock I was filthy, tired and fed up. Was that really my karma for shagging a sexy man?

I peeked at my phone, heart swelling a little at the name on the screen. Dad was requesting a FaceTime, which could only mean Ruby was about to go to bed.

I slid the accept bar across the screen and waited for the call to connect. Ruby’s face appeared, and she was dressed in her pyjamas with her hair done up in little space buns.

“Hola, querida.”

“Hola, máma,” Ruby grinned at me.

“Have you had a good day today?” I asked, and propped the phone up on my desk so I could rest my chin in my palms.

“It was amazing! We went to the water park on the caravan site for the whole day. Grandad came with me in case something happened but it didn’t and it was so much fun!”

I smiled helplessly. “That sounds like a fabulous day, muffin. I’m sorry I missed it - I used to love a water park. What was the best part?”

“There’s a whirlpool! So you drop into it and slide around and around this big bowl and then fall through a hole in the middle.”

“Oh, that does sound fun. I’m a little jealous.”

“Te echo de menos, Mummy.” Ruby said, voice quieter than it had been. Daniela had been teaching her while they were away, by the look of it.

I suddenly felt guilty. My chest hurt. “I miss you too, querida. Won’t be long now until you see me, though. Just a few more days.”

“Florence?” I heard my mother in the background of the call. She appeared behind Ruby, just as blurry and just as tinny. “¿Por qué no conduces hacia nosotras mañana por la noche?” Why don’t you drive down to us tomorrow night?

I took a deep breath and sank into my chair. That could actually work. “Sí, quizás. ¿Cuanto tiempo tardaría?” I asked how long it would take.

I noticed Ruby had started staring at something else; we were boring her.

“Cerca de cuatro horas.” About 4 hours.

Fucking hell!

“Quizás. Eso es un viaje largo.” Maybe. That’s a long drive.

I heard Dad say something but I couldn’t see him. Mum looked back to me with a serious expression, “Nosotras pagaremos la gasolina.” We’ll pay for the petrol.

I rolled my eyes. “No estoy luchando por el dinero. Estaba más preocupado por lo tarde que me llevaría allí.” I told her I was concerned about how late I’d get there rather than the financial aspect of it.

“Ah,” my mother laughed, “Viernes noche.” Friday night.

I nodded and dragged my dirty hand down my dirty face. “Está bien, sí. Vendré después del trabajo, pero no le digas.” I said I’d go, but they weren’t to tell Ruby. I wanted it to be a surprise.

“Mummy,” Ruby mumbled.

“Yes, poppet?”

“Is Bongo there?”

I looked over my shoulder at the dog curled up in his bed. I whistled at him, and he sat up immediately. “Come here, mate.”

The dog scrambled over, and I stroked a firm hand over his head before I picked him up and placed him in my lap. He just sat there panting with excitement.

“Bongo!” Ruby shouted with delight.

The puppy grew confused, recognising his name but not where it was coming from. He started pacing in my lap.

“I’ve missed you, puppy! I can’t wait to see you when I come home.”

“He’s missed you too, sweetness.” I assured her, stroking over his head.

“I wish you were both here with us.” My small child lamented.

“I wish we were there, too. I promise, in the summer the three of us will go away together, alright?”

“Okay!” She grinned.

“Vamos, Rubes.” My mother patted Ruby’s shoulders. “Es hora del baño.” It’s bath time.

“Sí, Abuela,” Ruby peered up to her with a smile.

“Bye, baby girl.” I cooed at her through my phone screen.

“Adios, Mamá. Te quiero.”

“I love you, too.”

Our phone call ended, and I felt deflated again. I held Bongo to my chest as I thought about our upcoming weekend and how plans had so quickly come about. The dog simply lay against me, allowing me to pet him as I pleased. I think, just like me, he was happy to have some company and some affection.

I closed the garage, went home and showered, and took the dog for a long walk. We stuck to the roads this time so that they’d at least be lit and we weren’t walking around a big field alone. The weather was on our side again.

I walked past Harry’s house and paused by the entrance to his drive. His car was parked in its place and I could see a dim light on in the kitchen. I wrestled with whether to go and knock on the door or to leave it and go home.

We hadn’t spoken since we parted ways this morning. I supposed it hadn’t really been necessary, plus we were both late for work and I hadn’t stopped moving all day.

I shook my head, pulled up my big girl trousers and marched my way up to the front door. I knocked three times, and then fiddled with Bongo’s lead while I waited for an answer.

Harry appeared maybe 30 seconds later, but his expression was difficult to read. And then he smiled and folded his arms across his chest. “Evening,”

“Hey…” I said, now feeling awkward. “Sorry for just turning up. I was… well, I thought it would be weird if I walked past your house and didn’t say anything… after last night, you know?”

“Really?” He asked, his question thoughtful. “This wasn’t just your intended destination?”

My cheeks burned. “No, I needed to take the dog for a walk.” I lifted the lead up a little.

“Convenient.”

I blinked, now feeling like a complete idiot. “Is it…?”

He giggled and took a step back. “For me, it is. Come in.”

I was bewildered, but I followed him anyway. I kicked my shoes off in the hallway, keeping Bongo on a tight leash while Harry fussed him so he couldn’t run riot.

“Have you eaten?”

I looked at Harry and shook my head. “No, I was going to do that when I got back home.”

He sighed and shook his head. He then took my hand and dragged me into the kitchen, sitting me down in the same place I’d sat the last time I was here. “I will feed you. Because we can’t have a repeat of yesterday, can we?”

I smiled at his comment, staring at the table. Bongo fussed around my feet, so I calmed him down with a few long strokes down his back.

“I haven’t actually eaten, either. I got… distracted with something.”

I wasn’t the type of person to pry for what it was.

Harry searched through his cupboards, the fridge and the freezer for something for us to eat. “Well this is embarrassing.”

“What is?”

“All I’ve got is packets of pasta, frozen chips and fish fingers.”

I giggled, resting my elbow on the table and my cheek against my closed fist. “You don’t have to feed me, Harry.”

“No, I want to.” He insisted. “I was meant to go shopping yesterday and… didn’t.”

I pressed my lips tightly, completely endeared by him. “I’m fine with fish fingers and chips if you are.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Alright.” He sighed.

I watched him closely as he took what he needed out of the freezer, laid it out on a baking tray and shoved it in the oven.

“I also don’t have anything sophisticated to drink.”

“What are the choices?” I asked, still watching him with a gooey look.

“Squash or water. Or straight gin.”

I giggled again, sitting straighter. “Water will be fine.”

He nodded with a pained look. “Such a shit host.”

“No worse than me.” I assured him. “I didn’t feed you at all yesterday.”

He looked over his shoulder with a smirk. “I ate.” He whispered, and I shook my head at him. “I don’t think either of us were interested in dinner yesterday.”

That much was true. I had severe tunnel vision last night, but he was entirely to blame for being so desirable. If he hadn’t come to the garage with his bravado and his words I would’ve just gone home and had another lonely night with a meal for one and an early bedtime.

“Is it Fridays you said you normally send Ruby to your parents?” He asked as he brought over two pint glasses filled with water and sat them on the table.

“Thank you,” I mumbled, pulling the glass closer to me. “Normally, yes.”

Harry nodded to himself as he sat down in the chair next to me. “So… next week, when Ruby is at your mum and dad’s, if I find someone to look after Oscar - will you let me take you for an actual dinner?”

I laughed once, grinning like a hopeless idiot. “Yes. That’d be nice.”

“And you won’t stand me up this time?”

“Promise.”

Harry was smiling too, his gaze fixed on the table. “Alright, good.” He took my hand in both of his and brought it to his lips. “I would do it this weekend, but I said I’d drive up to my Mum’s for the weekend before bringing Oscar back.”

“It’s fine. I… also said I’d go down to Cornwall after work tomorrow to spend a few days there.”

“Wasn’t that well-planned?”

“I know.”

Harry looked at me for a moment, and I looked at him. Nothing needed to be said, but I was happy I was with him, there and then. I was pleased I stopped and knocked on the door. It would’ve been so easy for me to carry on past and go back home.

“I’m glad you won’t be on your own this weekend.” Harry said quietly, his lips brushing over my hand. “I don’t want you to be alone, I don’t like the idea of it.”

“I know you don’t.”

“You promise me, if there’s a day, or a week, or however long-a period of time where you’re home on your own, you’ll come to me instead?”

I felt warm and tingly inside. I felt like something was about to change massively, but it would be a change for the good. I was excited. Something about this man made me feel safe. He provided a space for me, and for Ruby, that was untouchable. No one could hurt us if we had Harry.

“I promise.”

Harry smiled, and it was one of the most beautiful sights in the world. He tugged on my hand, squeezing it so that I’d come closer to him.

I stood, leaving the dog’s lead hooked on the back of my chair, and walked the few inches to where Harry was sitting. He rested his hands on my sides, never taking his eyes off me as I carefully placed myself in his lap, my legs either side of his.

I traced my finger over his lips while he smoothed his hands over my legs, my back and my bum. I was obsessed with his face - his mouth, his jaw and his nose in particular.

I kissed him without his permission, though he didn’t seem to mind. I held his face and he continued to caress my back as we snogged, a relatively innocent gesture that could turn salacious if we allowed it to. Perhaps not while dinner was cooking, though.

We kissed and kissed and kissed until our mouths were bruised and bloated. I could feel that Harry was hard between my legs and it was about to become dangerous. One rub the right way and I’d be demanding he take me to bed to finish me off. I’d rather save that for later.

“You know, I really like you, Florence.”

I sighed at his confession, resting my forehead against his. “I like you, too.”

“Even if I am a dentist.”

I giggled, and wrapped my arms around his shoulders to be closer to him. “Even if you are a dentist.”

He hummed into my cheek and left a wet kiss there. “Will you stay tonight?”

I pulled back, gently studying his entire face with my eyes and my hands. “On one condition.”

“The dog won’t be kicked out, I swear.”

I laughed loudly. I’d forgotten about the dog. “Not that.”

“What then?”

“You have to set an alarm now for the morning so we don’t forget.”

He grinned and pressed a firm kiss to my lips. “Deal.”

sixteen

On Friday evening I closed the garage up early and drove down to Cornwall to see Ruby and my parents for the weekend. I knew I was being optimistic thinking I’d make it there in 3 and a half hours like Google Maps said it would take. No journey is that simple on a Friday night, and especially not on the last weekend of Whitsun.

I left at 4:30 and I didn’t get there until much past 9pm. There’d been a road closure between Bibury and the motorway. There was an accident on the M5 to literally no one’s surprise. There was another road closure as soon as I got past Exeter, and then I got lost between there and Perranporth. I was irritable and tired when I walked through the door.

“Mummy!” Ruby shouted excitedly as soon as the door was open.

“Hola, querida,” I greeted her through a strained voice, letting Bongo off his lead to run riot around the van. I was past the point of caring.

She leapt towards me to give me a squeezing hug, but irritation aside I was happy to see her again. “What are you doing here?!”

“I missed you too much.”

She pinched my cheek with all her fingers like she used to when she was tiny, and I held her to me as tightly as possible.

“How was the journey, poppet?” Dad asked once Ruby was safely back on the floor.

I grunted. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Have you eaten?”

I shook my head. “Nope. Didn’t want to stop.”

My mother kissed her teeth and stood from her place on the sofa in the window. “I’ll make you some cheese on toast. Won’t do you any good to eat too much now.”

“Gracias, Mamá.” I sighed, kissing her cheek as she passed me. “We’re going to bed as soon as I’ve eaten, alright?” I said to Ruby. “It’s very late.”

“That’s okay. I’m tired.” She said in a passive tone, and went to sit on the sofa next to Dad and Bongo.

I carried my suitcase through to the second bedroom, which was harder to locate than I thought it would be. The caravan was long and had the living area and kitchen at the front, with two bedrooms and a full bathroom at the back. All the furnishings and decor were beige and grey. It felt clinically clean, even with my parents and my daughter in it.

Without unpacking I wandered back into the living room and sat down longways along the sofa so that my feet were up and I was facing the TV. Ruby didn’t hesitate to come and situate herself between my legs, resting her head on my chest. By the time I’d finished the cheese on toast my mother made for me, Ruby was already asleep. I spent half an hour combing my hands through her soft hair.

“Te ves bronceada, Florence.” You look tanned, my mother said in a near-whisper. “¿Has estado arreglando autos afuera?” Have you been fixing cars outside?

I chuckled. “No.”

Mum grunted. “Have you seen the girls much with all your free time this week?”

“Not really. Geri has been away all week in Spain and Zara went on holiday on Wednesday, so I’ve been alone.”

“Have you really been alone or are you just saying that?”

My gaze snapped to my mother, horrified. “What?”

She laughed under her breath to not wake Ruby. “I birthed you - I know you.”

Dad suddenly heaved, shaking his head as he stood up. “This is where I call it a night.”

I frowned as he left a kiss to the top of my head.

“Night, Floss. Nice to have you here.”

I stared after him as he wandered down the corridor to the room he and Mum had claimed. “Is he alright?” I asked once the bedroom door was closed.

“He’s fine, he just doesn’t want to talk about… you know what.”

I blinked at her. “No, I don’t know what.”

“Yes you do. Come on, tell me who it is.”

My cheeks started burning. I coughed and looked away. “No one.”

“Well that’s a load of shit.” She chastised. “Tell me. Is it the dentist? I hope it’s the dentist.”

“Mum!” I hissed. “It’s no one. There’s no one.”

“Stop fibbing!” She hissed back. “There’s obviously someone, you’re basically glowing. And it ain’t a pregnancy glow.”

I dragged my free hand down my face. “You’re being really embarrassing.”

“I’m your mother. You should want to tell me these things.”

“Well, I don’t.”

“Please?” She begged. “Si no es la dentista no me importarà.” If it’s not the dentist I won’t mind.

I lolled my head back until it hit the window. I winced at the pain. “Fine. It’s the dentist.”

My mother’s mouth fell with delight, her eyes glittering. “I knew it. What happened?”

I sighed, still with my fingers in Ruby’s hair. “He broke down late on Tuesday night so I had to go and get him. The next day he came to pick the car up and it just kind of… happened.”

“¿En el garajo?” In the garage?

I nodded.

She gasped and smacked my arm. “Florence!”

Her displeasure made me oddly smug. I knew I was doing something right if she didn’t approve.

“Was that it?”

“Nope. He… stayed the night and made us late for work yesterday. And then… I stayed with him last night.”

Mum covered her mouth from giggling. “Well… Buena para ti, querida.” Good for you, darling.

“You wanted this to happen.” I said, slightly bewildered by her reaction.

“I did… I thought you were too stubborn to do anything about it, though.”

“How rude.”

“All due respect, baby girl, but I know you didn’t make the first move.”

She wasn’t wrong. “Not my style.”

She rolled her eyes at me. “How do you feel about the whole thing?”

I thought about it for a minute. “I don’t know. I do like him - he’s very likeable. He wants to take me for dinner on Friday and I haven’t said no.”

“You’d be an idiot to say no.”

“Alright, bloody hell. I was only saying, you know? I would like to do that whole thing with him. As much as I wanted to avoid it before… there’s something about him that I really like.”

“He’s handsome.”

“Yes, obviously. But not just that.”

“Good with children.”

“Yeah… somethi-,”

“-Good in bed, by the sounds of it.”

“Por el amor Dios, Mamá.” For crying out loud, mother.

“Lo siento.” She pecked my shoulder. “You don’t need to look for an excuse or a reason to like him just because I wanted you to.”

“No, I know. I don’t even know what’s going to happen.”

“You don’t have to. Floss, it doesn’t matter if you see him for a bit and then leave it be, or whether you marry the bloke. It makes no difference to me, as much as I like the man. Do what is best for you. And obviously Ruby.”

I nodded and smiled at her. “Thank you, Mamá.”

“Siempre.” Always. “Take Mini to bed, you need a good rest.”

“Buenas noches.”

“Dormir apretada, querida.” Sleep tight.

I was sitting on the balcony at the front of the caravan alone. Ruby wanted my mother to bathe her before bed, and Dad had gone for a walk before the sun went down. All I could see was the sea, and all I could hear were the waves gently lapping against the cliffs below us. It was paradise.

Paradise aside, Ruby’s behaviour today had been interesting. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but she barely said a word to me all day. In fact she’d spent most of her day with Dad and the dog. I tried not to take offence to it, but something bothered me.

We’d spent pretty much the entire day at Perranporth beach. I spent the morning sunbathing with a book - the first time I’d read a book in a very long time, and then after lunch I went for a swim while it was hot so I wouldn’t die of a heat stroke. I tried to get Ruby to come in with me but she said she didn’t want to because she went in with Grandad in the morning and she’d already put suncream on. I couldn’t argue with that logic.

I took another long swig out of my wine glass and laid my head back to listen. There was a light breeze brushing up my arms, but it relieved the heat on them. I wasn’t sure yet if I’d managed to avoid the sunburn or not. I sat like that for some time.

Older children were in the play area up the road a bit, talking just loud enough for me to hear them but not their conversation. The site’s entertainment club at the opposite end of the park was thumping out music that I could only hear the bass to, and occasionally a car would drive past. All of this was far from a nuisance, though.

My only interruption was my phone vibrating on the table next to my wine glass. I peeled an eye open to look at the notification.

INCOMING CALL: Oscar’s Dad

I held my breath for a moment, a nervousness kicking up in my belly. I wasn’t expecting to hear from him at that moment and it made me anxious. I felt like a giddy teenager.

I picked up my phone and cleared my throat before I answered, “Hello?”

“Hi,” Harry said softly, and as equally as quiet as I had.

“Everything okay?” I asked, biting the tip of my fingernail.

“Yeah…” he said around an awkward laugh. “I was gonna try and not bother you, but… I wanted to talk to you.”

“About what?”

“Nothing in particular. I just missed you.”

My entire body grew hot, and my bitten smile was shy. “I miss you, too.”

“You do?”

“Yeah. Hate to admit it, but I liked having y’around the past few days.”

“Why do you hate to admit it?” His question seemed both genuine and teasing and it only made me feel more ridiculous.

“Because… I’ve spent the past 8 years telling people that I’m okay being alone in that way. And then I’ve spent 2 days with you and it’s all gone to shit.”

Harry chuckled. “It’s okay to be both. I think being alone and being lonely are two different things.”

“Did I come off as lonely?”

There was a pause, and I imagined him shrugging. “You did say it yourself that you didn’t like being on your own.”

“That’s a yes, then.”

He kissed his teeth. “Where are you?”

I was amused by him trying to change the subject, but I appreciated it. “On the balcony outside the caravan.”

“Can I see?”

“Er… yeah. Hang on.”

I pulled my phone away from my ear and took a photograph, sending it straight to him.

“Did you get it?”

There was another pause before he answered. “Yeah. Very nice.”

“Where are you?”

“On the sofa in my mum’s living room.” He laughed. “Comfy but nowhere near as exciting. Oscar is already flat out in bed and Mum went up early. So I’m all alone.”

“But you’re having a nice time?”

“I am. I always like coming up here for a couple of days.”

“Well then that’s all that matters.”

He hummed. “Are you having a nice time?”

“I am. I’m glad I came, actually. The journey was horrible but it doesn’t matter. Ruby was happy to see me and I was pleased to be back with her, too.” I neglected to mention that she was in some weird mood with me.

“That’s good.”

“I am looking forward to having my bed back, though. As lovely as this all is, sharing a small bed in a caravan with someone as fidgety as Ruby is not the one.”

As I said it, I heard Mum and Ruby emerge from the bathroom as the water drained through the pipes underneath the caravan.

“Just one more night. Two more until you see me again.”

I snorted at his sense of importance. “That’s obviously the best part.”

“Obviously.”

I took a deep breath and looked over my shoulder inside the van. “Ruby is about to get into bed.”

“Okay. I’ll let you go. Just do me one favour?”

“What’s that?”

“Let me know when you’re home tomorrow. It’ll put my mind at rest.”

I wanted to squeal, he was so thoughtful. “I will. Lo prometo.”

“Grassy arse.”

I rolled my eyes. “My mother would kill you if she heard you say it like that.”

“I’ll get practising for the next time I see her.” He said earnestly. “Goodnight, Florence.”

I ignored the fact that I was once again overcome with glee at the way he used my full name. “Night, Harry.”

We ended our call and I finished my glass of wine before I went inside. The sun was nearly set which meant Dad’s imminent return with the puppy, and I could hear Ruby making a fuss over her pyjamas at the back of the caravan. I left my wine glass in the sink and went to find out what was going on.

“What’s all this then?” I asked from the doorway with a little frown.

Ruby stopped her whines as soon as I appeared in the doorway, but she refused to look at me. She was scowling and it was a rare sight.

“Her pyjamas are too small on her.” Mum said quietly. “Must’ve shrunk when I put them in the dryer on the site yesterday.

“Okay…” I nodded thoughtfully. “Well, we’re going to need to go shopping on our way home tomorrow, so why don’t we get you some new ones then, aye?”

“Well, yeah. But what about now?”

I was taken aback by how much like a teenager she sounded. She wasn’t at that age already, was she? I wasn’t old enough to have a stroppy teenager.

“You can have one of my nighties. Or what about one of Abuelo’s t-shirts?”

Ruby pursed her lips and stared at the wall. I was reminded instantly of Federico, because he used to make exactly the same face when he was thinking. I looked at the floor, saddened.

“Abuelo’s t-shirt.” My daughter decided.

“Bueno.” Mum nodded and stood from her place, patting Ruby’s leg. “I’ll be right back with one.”

I moved aside for her and went to sit in the space she’d just left. I placed a kiss on top of Ruby’s head, but she still refused to look at me.

“What’s going on, querida?” I asked in a whisper.

“Nothing.” She mumbled.

“You sure? Barely spoken to me all day - feel like I’ve done something wrong.”

She shrugged and wiped her nose.

I took a deep breath. “You know you can tell me if I’ve upset you. Being honest is important to me.”

She looked at me then with another scowl. “I’m fine, Mummy.”

I studied her face for a moment, and it almost looked malicious. I wanted to cry. “Alright… Do you want me to put you to bed?”

“No.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Okay. I’ll leave you with Grandma, then.”

I left the room, trying not to let my tears weep, but they did. I went and sat in the front of the caravan with my head in my hands and silently cried. It was weird - going from that giddy high to being dragged back down to Earth and stomped on by my own child. She’d never ignored me like that before. I wasn’t sure what I’d done to make her respond to me in that way, but she was too young to be hormonal.

Dad came back with the puppy about fifteen minutes after I’d stopped crying, leaving the dog with me to go and change. Either he didn’t notice my blotchy face, or it’d already calmed down. Bongo curled up in my lap and went to sleep immediately.

My mother reappeared not long after that and came to sit with me. “¿Estás bien?”

I shook my head and bit my lip to stop it wobbling. “Realmente no.” Not really.

“No se que le pasa hoy. Podría ser uno fuera de lugar, estoy segura de que estará bien mañana.” I don’t know what’s got into her today. Might just be an off one, I’m sure she’ll be fine tomorrow.

“¿Ella ha dicho algo?” Has she said anything?

“No, ella no me diría. Pensé que podría sacárselo, pero ella era terca y silenciosa.” No, she wouldn’t tell me. Thought I might be able to pry it out of her but she was just stubborn and silent.

“Debo haber hecho algo mal. Ella nunca es así conmigo.” I must’ve done something wrong. She’s never like this with me.

“Estoy segura de que no es nada, Floss.” I’m sure it’s nothing, Floss.

“Eso espero.” I hope so.

My mother sighed and rested her head on my shoulder. “Were you talking to someone on the phone earlier?”

I tried to keep still. “Uh-huh.”

“Who was it?”

I didn’t answer. I knew I probably didn’t need to.

She looked up at me with a smile. “Was it the dentist?”

“Maybe.”

She giggled. “Don’t be coy.”

“I’m not.” I couldn’t be something if I didn’t know what it meant.

“What did you talk about?”

“¡Mamá!” I hissed, swatting the back of my hand to her thigh. “Stop being nosey.”

“Oh, come on.”

“It was nothing, we were just chatting.”

“Did he call you?”

“Sí.”

“Aye, le gustas.” Oh, he likes you.

I gave a flat hum and shook my head.

“Lo sabía.” I knew it, my mother was smug.

“Whatever.” I scoffed.

I didn’t stay up for much longer with Mum and Dad before I decided to call it a night.

Ruby was spread out all across the bed but she was flat out, so I repositioned her on the side closest to the wall and settled down next to her. She was so angelic like that I couldn’t help but fawn over her. She was angelic most of the time, just not today. I played with her hair and stroked her cheek, but she never moved a muscle.

Sleep claimed me in no time at all.

We didn’t hang around in Perranporth on Sunday morning. Mum and Dad stayed back for a few hours to check out of the site and visit Port Isaac (where Doc Martin is filmed), but I wanted to get some groceries and get Ruby home so she was ready to go back to school on Monday morning.

She picked the music for the journey, randomly selecting songs from my music library and playing them when she felt like it, even if the last one hadn’t finished yet. It was starting to give me a headache, but she still wasn’t really talking to me so I let her do what she wanted.

We stopped at a Sainsbury’s in Taunton to do the shopping. It was about halfway home and it also made a nice change from shopping in Tesco. Ruby found some new pyjamas and a sticker book to keep her occupied for the rest of the way home, and we also picked up some lunch, which we ate in the car park before we took off again. I was aware it wasn’t a very exciting thing to do, but I really was eager to go home. My headache did subside a little after I’d eaten.

“Mummy?”

I glanced at my daughter, a little shocked that she was deciding to speak to me again. “Yes, muffin?”

We were coming up to the North Bristol junction where the M4 and M5 met, so we didn’t have too much further to go before we were home.

“Do you have a boyfriend?”

My stomach churned, and I was probably a little too slow with my answer. “No, I don’t have a boyfriend.” It wasn’t technically a lie.

“Are you getting a boyfriend?”

“Er… I don’t know.”

“What does that mean?”

I spluttered a laugh. “It means I don’t know. I might get one, I might not. I don’t… I don’t have any solid plans to, but it doesn’t mean in the future I won’t have one.”

“Right…”

I blinked, a little confused by the general conversation. “Is that okay?”

In my periphery I noticed her crumpling stickers in her hand. “I don’t want you to have a boyfriend.”

“Well, that’s fine, because I don’t have one.”

“But I don’t want you to get one later, either.” She said in a flat voice, and then looked right up at me. “Promise you won’t get a boyfriend, Mummy.”

I was a little stunned for words. “Rubes… I’m not gonna promise that to you.”

“Why not?”

“Because some time down the line I might find someone I really like.”

“What if I don’t like them?”

“Well, that’s different. The only way anyone could ever become my boyfriend is if they get your approval first.”

“I’ll hate all of them.”

“You don’t know that you’ll hate all of them, Ruby. Someone might come along who’s really nice.”

“Won’t matter.” She insisted.

“Why not?”

“Because boys are rubbish and I know they won’t be good enough for you.”

“Oh,” I gave a breathy laugh as I glanced her way again, “poppet, that’s very sweet.” I stroked a hand over her hair. “No matter what happens with whoever, you are always my number one priority, okay? No man comes before you, I can promise you that.”

Ruby was quiet for a moment, but I knew she wanted to say something else. “Sorry for being grumpy.”

I giggled. “That’s alright. You’ve had a long week, you’re probably tired.”

“Yeah.”

“Have a nap if you want to. It’ll do you good.”

“I’m not very good at napping.”

“Me neither. But it never hurts to try.”

“But then you’ll be lonely.”

“Impossible. I’ve got you and Bongo. I’ll be just fine.”

She looked at me, then at her lap and sighed. “Okay,” she said, and pushed everything on her lap onto the floor. “Will you wake me up if you feel lonely?”

“I will.”

“Thank you, Mummy. I love you.”

I took her hand and pressed a kiss to it. “Te amo más.”

Ruby kissed my hand in return, and then turned to rest her head against the window. I didn’t hear another word out of her until we were home.

seventeen

Even though it had only been three days I was nervous to see Harry again - that nervousness that came with the prospect of a new relationship, though. Not the other, generalised type of nerves. I didn’t have anxiety belly or a disposition. I was excited more than anything.

I was cleaning the kitchen after dinner when he finally arrived to collect his child. I looked at the clock on the wall when the door knocked and thought it a little odd that he was an hour late - usually I was the tardy one (thanks for the English lesson, Darren). I left the towel on the oven handle and went to answer the door.

“Sorry I’m late.” Harry said immediately. “I called a patient about a gingival graft and immediately regretted it.”

I blinked. Did he expect me to know what that was? “That’s okay. I’m late all the time.”

“Has he been alright?”

“Yeah, fine. Same as always.” I laughed awkwardly.

Harry smiled, his gaze studious. “Are you alright?”

I nodded. “Just fine. Are you?”

“Marvellous now.”

I felt the blush creeping up on me. “Good. Do you… want to come in for a tea?”

Harry bit away a smirk. “Why did you ask that as if you don’t really want me to?”

I took a deep breath and looked towards the ceiling. “I do want you to come inside. However, Ruby is currently on some weird anti-male campaign and I’m worried if she sees you in the house she’ll think something is going on.”

“Something is going on, Floss.”

“No, I know.” I groaned. “Sorry, I’m being a twat.”

“Tell you what… I’ll pass on the tea this time around, and I’ll text you later instead.”

“That’s not the same thing.”

He rolled his eyes at me. “Where is Ruby now?”

“Upstairs.”

“Good, so she won’t have a clue if I do…” He stepped inside the door, ushering me backwards just enough so that he could close it behind him, but that we weren’t visible to the rest of the house. Then he kissed me. Just once, very politely, on the lips. “That.”

My entire face was on fire. “Right.”

I peered into the house to see if by some freaky inconvenience she’d appeared to judge me, but there were no children in sight. I could hear them playing upstairs.

While I had the opportunity, I kissed Harry back. Harder. That kiss was different from all others before, because we felt as if we were being naughty - like teenagers in a school corridor during lesson time. It felt dangerous.

He held onto me as I did him, his hands against my back under my t-shirt and my hands holding his face. My tongue was in his mouth, mint the primary flavour, and his nose was pushed into my cheek. It was messy. More messy than it needed to be, yet I felt it could be messier. I wanted him on the floor with his fingers inside of me.

I was startled by my own thoughts and immediately pulled away.

“No,” Harry whined, chasing after me.

“Yes.” I retorted, pushing at his face and then readjusting my t-shirt. “Oscar, Daddy’s here!” I called up the stairs, wiping said father’s saliva off my face at the same time.

Harry made a guttural noise. “That’s a dangerous word.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I said, forcing a calm smile when I turned back to him.

His nostrils flared and his jaw set. He was amused and trying not to show it. “Liar.”

As the children thumped their way down the stairs, I ushered Harry back outside before Ruby could tell me off for having a male in the house. He was quite obviously entertained by my panic.

“Hi, mate.” Harry said to his child when he appeared together with mine.

“Hi, daddy.” Oscar said innocently while trying to put his shoes back on.

“Have you had a good day?”

Ruby slipped under my arm and wrapped herself around me. At least I knew she still liked me to some degree.

“Yeah,” was all Oscar decided to offer.

“That’s good.” Harry smiled. “Shall we get you home?”

“Okay,” he nodded, and stood right in front of his dad in the doorway. Then he turned over his shoulder and gave me the smallest, cutest smile, “thank you, Ruby’s Mum.”

I couldn’t help my delighted expression. “You’re very welcome, Oscar.”

“Bye, Oscar!” Ruby suddenly shouted, still clinging to me.

“Bye, Ruby.” He returned with a little wave, and then stepped outside to begin walking down the path to Harry’s car.

“Have a good evening.” Harry said.

“And you, Harry.”

Ruby stayed silent as she clung to me, and when I looked down at her she was scowling.

“Ruby, say goodbye, please.”

She huffed. “Bye.”

I had to refrain from telling her off while Harry was still there, but I knew my expression was giving me away.

“See you later.” He chuckled. At least he wasn’t offended.

Ruby pottered back into the living room as soon as he started walking down the path, but I waited until he was in his car and already driving out of the close.

“Mummy?”

I took a deep breath and closed the door before I answered her. “Yes, poppet?”

She was sitting on the sofa next to a sleeping Bongo. “Can you teach me some Spanish?”

I was a little surprised by her question. “You want me to teach you some Spanish?”

“Yeah… Abuela would teach me some before bed on holiday and I liked it a lot.”

“Oh,” I said around breathy laughter. “Sure, I can teach you a little bit. What do you want to know?”

I sat with her on the sofa, and she curled up next to me with her head against my boob. I stroked my hand over her hair. We sat like that for the whole night while I spoke Spanish at her and she just listened, repeating after me in her little English accent. Mum would have a fit if she heard her talking Spanish with an English lilt, but at least she was trying.

I talked and talked until she eventually fell asleep with her head in my lap. I simply watched her for a little while, cooing over her gorgeous little face. She was rosy in her cheeks and her dark hair shone even in the dim light of our front room.

For some reason my thoughts turned to what a world without her might be. What would it be like if I hadn’t kept her. I realised how much I didn’t want that. I’d be lost without her; I would be a woman without a purpose.

I did exactly what I shouldn’t do, and carried her to bed to sleep with me in mine, and I let the dog up, too. The three of us slept cooped up together like Eskimos in an igloo, except it was boiling hot outside and Ruby was like an oven at night. Alas, I kept the two of them right next to me, and we stayed that way the entire night.

The next day, when I collected Ruby from school, Harry and Geri were standing together in the car park as they waited for the children to be released from their educational prison. I tried to behave like I wasn’t over the moon that he was there - I had to play this relatively cool, didn’t I? Nobody, apart from my mother, knew what Harry and I were doing, and I wasn’t sure how obvious I was allowed to be. Actually, being obvious was completely off the cards anyway, because I didn’t want the other parents talking about us yet.

“Alright?” Geri asked when I took my place beside them.

“Yeah, fine.” I shrugged. “You?”

She grunted. “Bit tired. Zara said it was busy today?”

“Only as busy as every day is at the moment.”

“She was being dramatic, then.”

“As always.”

“That doesn’t sound like Zara.” Harry commented, his tone passive.

The two of us looked at him, and he was smirking.

“I actually wanted to ask you,” Geri said as if she’d forgotten something, ignoring Harry’s joke, “are you free on Friday? I need a girl’s night.”

“Er,” I could feel my face burning and it probably wasn’t a good look. I glanced at Harry, who was already looking at me with an odd, smugly expectant look on his face. I couldn’t say no outright, that would be too obvious. But I obviously didn’t want to give up my planned date night.

“No offence, Harry.” Geri laughed, swatting his arm.

He cleared his throat and folded his arms. “None taken.”

“It is Fridays Ruby goes to your Mum’s isn’t it?” Geri pressed

“Yeah, it is.” I couldn’t deny that - it had been the same ever since Ruby started going to school.

“Oh wait,” Geri visibly paused, and then smacked her cheek, “I can’t do this Friday. I’m taking Milly to the theatre.”

What a relief. “That’s fine.”

“Next Friday?”

Children began to appear on the playground so I kept an eye out for Ruby.

I nodded. “I can do next Friday.” If a second date with Harry was at all on the cards, it would have to wait. Even though I didn’t really want to.

“Cool. I’ll get onto Zara.”

“Okay.”

Oscar was the first to arrive out of the three children, but I found it unusual that Ruby wasn’t with him. I watched as he greeted his daddy with a little fistbump, and then Harry rubbed his hair playfully. I wanted to stare at their interactions all day - they were so simple but so cute.

“Where’s Ruby, Oscar?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” he looked up at me blankly, “I think she went to the toilet.”

“Alright.” I smiled at him.

“See you tomorrow?” Harry prompted.

I gave him a small nod and a closed-lip smile. “Yeah, see you tomorrow.”

“Bye guys.” Geri said with a wave when they started to walk back towards their car.

“Bye-bye!” The two of them called together.

As soon as they were out of ear shot, Geri said, “They are disgustingly adorable.”

I desperately wanted to agree, but I also wanted to remain passive. I simply hummed.

Not long after Milly appeared, still without Ruby, so I let the two of them go home. I was conscious of Bongo in the car on his own. I’d left the window down for him but I was still itching to get to Mum and Dad’s.

When Ruby did finally appear ten or so minutes later, she didn’t seem particularly rushed or worried.

“¡Vamos, Rubes, la abuela se preguntará dónde estamos!” Come on, Grandma will be wondering where we are!

She heard me shouting and picked up her pace a little.

“Why are you so late out, querida?” I asked, stroking over the top of her head when she reached me.

She didn’t look at me when she answered. “I needed the toilet.”

“For 20 minutes?”

We began walking back to the car so we wouldn’t be any more late. “I had… an issue.”

I knew what she meant, I just wasn’t sure which end of the spectrum she meant. Or whether she was just lying about her ‘issue’. “Are you poorly?”

“I don’t know, maybe.”

“Well, have you been like it all day?”

“No, just when I was leaving.”

I stopped and sighed, pulling her against me for a hug. “Alright, my darling. But you have to let me know if it keeps happening, okay?”

“Okay.” Was all she said.

“Buena niña.” I pecked the top of her head. “No me gusta verte enferma.”

“What does that mean?” She asked, resting her chin against my chest to give me a dopey look.

“It means, I don’t like it when you’re poorly.”

“Can you say it again?”

Slowly, because I knew she learned better by watching my lips move, I repeated myself. “No me gusta verte enferma.”

“No me gusta verte enferma.” She copied me word for word, in a much less Spanish accent.

“Eso es todo.” That’s it, I grinned and pinched her cheek. “Be careful with your accent around Grandma if you try anything later.”

“I know, she always tells me off.”

I chuckled as I helped her into the car. “Well, Abuela has been speaking Spanish a lot longer than both of us. The accent can be very important.”

She grunted at me, and that was the last we said on it. I gave her cheek another pinch and then got myself buckled in so that we could get going. Only time would tell if she was telling the truth about her bathroom issue.

I’d basically tipped my wardrobe upside down trying to find something to wear for my dinner with Harry. I knew it wouldn’t matter to him, but I still wanted to look… good. I cringed outwardly at myself. I hadn’t wanted to look good for a man since Federico, and here I was turning my entire wardrobe inside out. I needed some inspiration from somewhere.

It was hot, and would remain so for the foreseeable night ahead. So I couldn’t face the idea of jeans sticking to my thighs. I’d fucked myself over with that one considering 99% of my wardrobe was jeans, leggings and stupid graphic t-shirts. I dug around for a skirt - my only one, which was probably the wrong colour for anything but it was the first real idea I’d had. I eventually found it - a cream guipure lace maxi skirt with a ruffled hem.

Now I just needed a top to go with it. I discarded all my t-shirts and found the one I was looking for - a ditsy floral off the shoulder thing with puffy sleeves and a neckline a bit lower than I’d usually go for. I didn’t actually purchase that one myself - it was a gift from Zara. Clearly she knew I’d need it one day.

I’d already showered and was waiting for my hair to dry, so I put on a little bit of makeup, cleaned my teeth and made sure I smelled the furthest thing from oil and grease. Once my hair was at an acceptable level of dryness, I brushed it again and put some serum on the ends so it didn’t look so lifeless. I was obviously due in for another trim - if I didn’t remind my mother, she would surely remind me in the next few days. I sent her a quick text:

Floss 18:45 ¿Corte de pelo mañana? xxx

I made my way downstairs to put my sandals on while I waited for her answer, and found my little over-the-shoulder bag to put my things in rather than taking my usual rucksack.

Mamá 18:47 Sí, venir más tarde después del cierre xxx

She wanted me to come after the shop had closed, I imagine because she wanted Harry and I to spend as long together as possible before I collected Ruby. Sneaky woman.

I tucked my phone into my little bag and made my way into the village. It was so warm that it didn’t take very long for my legs to start chafing, and I immediately regretted my decision to wear a skirt without at least some shorts underneath. I should’ve thought about some chafing cream… maybe they had something in the shop next to Harry’s house.

I stopped in on my way past, and while they didn’t have any chafing cream specifically, they did have some Savlon. I gave my mother a thought, because her resolve for any issue was always Savlon. She would be proud. I stashed the cream in my bag before I left the shop. I don’t know why I was embarrassed at the thought of someone catching me with it, because everyone chafes, but I didn’t want anyone besides the nice shopkeeper knowing that I had it. Especially not Harry.

The walk across his gravel driveway to his front door was much more difficult in sandals than it was in boots or trainers, and I had to do my absolute best not to fall on my face. I knocked on the door and patiently waited for an answer.

Except I never got one.

I looked at the time and frowned. We’d agreed to meet at 7, and it was now 7. I tried the door again, this time a little louder in case he was at the opposite end of the house.

Still, I never heard even a slight shuffle.

I suddenly felt uncomfortable. Was I being mocked? That didn’t seem like Harry… I took multiple steps backwards until I nearly fell off the porch, and had to look around myself to make sure nobody had seen me. I checked my phone for a message, but I didn’t have any kind of notification waiting for me. I looked up, blindly shoving my phone back into my pocket while trying not to get upset.

I looked out across the river and scanned the area, still conscious of being seen to look like an idiot. I realised it wasn’t that hard for me to do.

And then I noticed something at the top of Awkward Hill.

Harry was standing outside Barb’s house. Even though it was a fair distance away I knew it was him, and I knew where Barb lived because everyone in the village knew where everyone lived. Oscar had apparently been given some e-numbers because he was zipping around his daddy’s legs nearly tripping him over. And then I could see Barb in the open doorway, she and Harry chatting.

I watched as Harry ushered Oscar inside, gave Barb a very brief hug and then began walking away.

Something was niggling at me. I didn’t know instantly what it was, but I was being thick. Again. Why would Harry take Oscar to Barb’s for the night? Had they just become familiar since he’d moved and she offered to look after him on nights when he needed a break?

“Oh my God,” I said out loud, realising what it was that was niggling at me.

Barb’s daughter Lottie was married to Harry! How the fuck had I not realised that?! I felt like an idiot, only I could take that long to work out something so simple. Of course! I was even in the room when Barb said to my mother that he’d moved here with the baby. Except, Oscar wasn’t a baby anymore, but I guess in many ways he was the baby generally speaking.

I tried to calm myself down before Harry reached me, because I couldn’t have him knowing that I was only now understanding his role.

When I could finally make him out, he wasn’t at all dressed how I expected him to be. He had on a navy and white horizontal stripe top with white linen trousers and black espadrilles. Not to be disgusting but he looked delicious. His facial hair was definitely helping.

“Hello,” He greeted me with a smile as soon as he was on the driveway.

“Hi,” I said as calmly as I possibly could.

He placed a very innocent kiss on my lips, his eyes wandering what he could see of me. “You look very lovely.”

I swallowed the small, dry lump in my throat. “Thank you. You look…”

“Awful?” He suggested with a laugh.

I shook my head immediately. “No. The exact opposite of that.”

“Oh,” He said with a mild surprise. ‘“Thank you. Sorry I’m late, I had to take Oscar up to Barb’s - she wasn’t back in time to get him from school.”

I shrugged. “It’s alright. I only mildly panicked.”

“I’d be a twat to miss a date with you.” He insisted, and gently took my hand. “Are you hungry?”

“Absolutely starving.”

We walked the short distance to The Swan hand in hand, talking about our day in the most simple and easy way. It felt so odd being like this with someone, but in a really good way. I never thought it would be that… uncomplicated, to just be with someone. Harry made it feel like the most natural thing in the world.

Given the temperature, we decided to sit in the garden in the shade somewhere, a little bit obscured from the view of any prying eyes. We ordered a bottle of wine to share, and I very quickly chose what I wanted to eat. Harry didn’t take much longer either.

“Is Ruby feeling better?”

I gave a singular breathy laugh. “I don’t think she was ill in the first place.”

“No?”

I shook my head. I’d asked Ruby multiple times daily since Tuesday if she’d had any more toilet problems and her answer was always no, and that she was fine. “I might be reading into it too much, but it’s strange for a child to have one bad toilet trip and be that shy about it. Especially my child. She has never been shy about anything in her life.”

“Do you think she’s being deceitful about something?”

I thought he knew by now not to use big words around me. I cocked my brow.

“Lying.” He chuckled. “Do you think she’s lying about something?”

“Oh, yes. But I don’t know what. I’ve told her before she doesn’t need to keep things from me, and it’s just not like her to lie.”

Harry made a complacent hum. “I’m sure it’ll sort itself out, Floss. Maybe she did just have a bathroom incident.”

I grunted. “Maybe.”

He reached across the table to take my hands. “If there’s one thing I’ve learnt about kids from having one, it’s that they can’t keep secrets for long. They don’t know how to, not when it’s about themselves. Oscar is the quietest child I’ve ever known, but if he’s poorly he won’t shut up about it. And if he’s been hiding something from me, he will always slip up at some point and give himself away. They’re too young to be dishonest.”

I stared at him for a moment with a pout, and I could feel his thumbs rubbing into the back of my hands among gentle squeezes. Eventually, I sighed, “You’re right. Thank you.”

He shrugged. “Any time. Maybe now you’ll tell me why you’re so scared of dentists.”

I barked a laugh. “Ha! Fuck no.”

He groaned and rolled his head back. “Why?!”

“Because it’s none of your business, that’s why.”

Harry pulled a face and dropped his head against our hands. His nose muzzled against my skin and it made me feel dizzy. “Please?”

“No.”

He peered up at me. “Whatever it is, it’s definitely not as bad as you think it is.”

“It’s not up to you to be the judge of that.”

He narrowed his eyes as he sat up straighter again. “One day…”

I rolled my eyes. “Nope.”

He watched me for a moment, relaxed in his composure and his gaze overtly warm. I felt like freshly baked bread under it, ready to be sliced up and consumed by him.

Unfairly, I thought of Lottie at that moment. I thought how, at one point, or multiple points, that affectionate gaze had belonged to her. I didn’t even resent her for it. I actually felt guilty, because I felt like I was taking him away from her, even though she wasn’t here anymore.

I cleared my throat, prying one of my hands out of his to take a sip of wine.

“What are you thinking about?” He asked, watching me intently still, except this time he looked concerned.

“Nothing.” I said, shaking my head, and then I took another drink.

“I can see it in your face, Florence. Something just… bothered you.”

“I’m fine, Harry. Promise.”

He carried on looking at me for a little while longer, and then he used his free hand to take a drink of his own. “If it’s about your elusive dental-related incident then I think I have a right to know.” He said around the lip of his wine glass, a jesting lilt to his tone.

“Sod off, you do not have a right to know.” I laughed, and shifted in my seat. I pulled my left leg up and tucked it underneath my right thigh.

“Not fair of you to keep me in the dark like this. Think it’s really mean.”

“Well now you’re just being childish.”

He scoffed, perpetually offended, and ripped his hand away from mine. “How rude.”

“Baby.”

“Stop it.”

I smirked. “Big, big baby.”

“Go back to being cute and unassuming, you were easier to flirt with.”

I wanted to be offended but I had to laugh. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Harry.”

“That’s more like it.”

Eighteen, Nineteen & Twenty

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