#and he sees a lot of things as 'man things' and 'woman things'

[fairene]

gravity / ln

lando norris x fem!reader

reader uses she/her pronouns, no use of y/n.

where your life with him is just beginning.

yes! yes! i have insane brainrot for lando norris! yes! this is meant as a single 'oneshot' of sorts, but i am open to taking requests of this so called 'universe.' reader here is a stem major, particularly physics (shoutout to the stem students!) which helps perfect the progression. also was inspired by interstellar.

wc: 15.2k woops!

warnings: smut! -- MINORS DNI!!, porn with a lot of plot! angst, drinking, language, friends to lovers, corruption kink (minor), choking, soft!top lando.

it was all consuming; he was, at least, with his curly hair, upturned eyes, smile that brightened the entire room. utterly irresistible, any woman could agree. they’d jump his bones the second he gave them a lingering glance, a playful wink.   but that’s all it ever was with those girls— glances, observations. but you, on the contrary, were a fixation. an obsession, one might call it— actually, someone has before. but you ignored it and let it fly over your whimsical head. how could a man like lando norris ever glance in your direction like he did those models, influencers? 

you were always just his friend. his best one, yours too you’d admit only in the solace of your lonesome in the hours of the evening. you met him when you were studying abroad in london at the ripe age of nineteen. you were there on a research term for a professor at your university, though it was much far north of london's borders. still, the girlfriends you managed to make would insist on your attendance to the night club scene on the town. 

who were you to deny any pleasantries? a hardworking student. a student with a vision, a dream to be more than what society compressed women to be. you’d rather be out to the stake like a medieval witch than become a loftily homemaker. while it was some of your friends desires, yours stretched far beyond the horizon of which any life was palpable. 

a nerd in short terms. 

you studied physics. with as much fun as your girlfriends had in the club, you found it in the quiet evenings if your research. you’ve devoted a great deal of time for your studies, but hey— every girl lets go here and there. 

the one time you did, you met him. in the late evening hours of the bustling club, drink in your hand, short dress sticking to your sweaty skin, he scared your close friend, laurel.

“boo,” he had said with a low tone, grabbing the girl with a blonde bob by the shoulders. she shrieked despite the loud atmosphere and spun around, slapping him on the chest. 

“lando!” she exclaimed, which had your attention drawn upward from the half bitten olive in your martini. he was taller than her, than you, muscularity built with a low taper cut of chestnut hair. he was freckled, and the first thing you noticed about him was the way that his eyes smiled. 

they curved up at the edges and you could feel the warmth of the sun drip in from the rooftop. even though it was past midnight at this point. 

“i didn’t know you were coming,” laurel breathed at an awkward pace then turned to face you. she outreached her hand for you to take with your free one. you did, feeling warm from the alcohol that you had downed from the night. 

“lando, this is my bestie from school,” she introduced you by name, to which you gave a small, dramatic courtesy towards the brit. his eyes caught on your act, gleaming with something you could even see in the yellow hued lights of the club. “this is lando norris, rookie of…what team again?”

you glanced from laurel to lando, brows raised. he hesitated for a moment, gracing you with a lopsided smile that, in time, you’d come to adore. 

“mclaren. formula one racing.” he answered, taking a hand to brace the back of his neck. he felt the need to clarify for you, which you took in earnest. he earned a light ahh in your reaction. 

you were impressed, to say the least. you hadn’t ever met a formula one driver in the flesh, nor you could say you were a devoting fan. of course you knew what it was, watched it on sundays when your uni friends would turn it on, but that was it. as smart as you were, it seemed that someone knew more about something than you did. you reeled. 

“and you like it?” you said after a beat, swirling the toothpick inside the olive around your finger. lando seemed to contemplate your words, taken back by such a question. without a doubt he liked racing, otherwise he wouldn’t do it. but that’s not what she was asking, was she? it weighed on him more as his mind unraveled the layers to such a question, but he ended on a simple answer:

“i don’t know if i could love anything more.” a jest, playful and lightheaded when it came from him. 

but how the whims would be tested over the years. 

────────────

a year later

“a whole season, lando?” you asked him, hands drawn out before you to iterate the sincerity of what he was asking. 

a season of going to races with him.

you were graduating within the next two semesters. twenty two now, whereas he was twenty three. but you had qualified to graduate early, as your intent was to do as such, but the tempting leave of absence form that sat in your lap tempted you even further. 

you sat in his monaco flat, a frequent place you visited or stayed until you recently gained residency in monte carlo. it was efficient enough for what you needed to do for work— france around the corner, italy to the west. the best physicians rallied in europe, and staying in the isolated united kingdom was not the best option for you. you caved at his months of pleading to move to monaco. 

your legs crossed as you glanced from his pacing, anxious position. your fingers tapped incessantly at the piece of paper before you, pre-addressed envelope sitting on the coffee table. 

“why not?” he questioned, putting his hands up in defense, stopping before you. he looked down at you, his heart thundering in his chest. say yes he wanted to plead. his knees felt weak. wobbly as your eyes looked back at him, determined. he loved that look. it drove him wild, enchanted by how the cogs of your brain turned. 

you sighed, looking off to the side out the floor to ceiling window. “how would i even pay for all—“

“you wouldn’t drop a pound.” 

you were taken back. you could never expect him to pay for that. you knew he was well off, given his hefty contract, but you are friends. friends don’t use each other for money. 

“lando—“ you began to shake your head. 

“no, no, don’t do that.” he stopped you, earning a glare from you. he shivered, relishing in how vindictive you could be. he hasn’t seen it many times untamed, but the fantasy had his blood roaring. “if money wasn’t a problem, would you come?”

“well—“ you attempted to come up with a defense, but nothing formed. you were at a loss of words. “what would i even wear?”

it was february when you touched down in jeddah. lando has instructed you to fly on the jet with him, side by side for the entire eight hour journey. 

you were taken back by the sudden personal touches and longing looks from him. something has changed. over the past year he’s had a few girlfriends, none of them serious so he’s told you, and you believed him. your blind affliction to nod your head and whisper okay was the only way you found that you could truly protect yourself. ignorance is bliss, or whatever the poets say. 

with your legs crossed the entire flight and eyes peering from the window, you never once felt lando’s eyes drilling into your face. though he was entirely enamored by your bravery, your understanding how important this was to him. 

you may be the only one to truly understand his passion. as he began to understand yours. 

on your lap was a research journal translated from german. your professor had sent it over to you for your leave of absence, along with ideas for your masters thesis. she was a kind woman and you appreciated all the work she has done to support you. especially translate it from german. 

you tended when you felt lando spread his legs, knee bumping into your calf. but you didn’t shy away. 

“what’re you reading?” 

“do you really want to know?”

he didn’t hesitate. “why wouldn’t i?”

your chest tightened at his soft tone. you’d never get used to that, would you? when you were in such close proximity with him, he would become so gentle, caring. not that he wasn’t in public spaces but… what was the word you were looking for?

intimate

“after your season i fly to germany to finalize my thesis. i’m still struggling on a topic, but…” you flip back a few pages in the book which was messily annotated and sticky-noted. you stopped on the event horizon section. “this one caught my eye. always fascinated me.”

lando scanned the page. it wasn’t the words he was reading, but the marks you left behind. messily written notes in the margins, smeared ink, bright orange notes with rather… rushed drawings of a black hole, surrounded by streams of… “what is it?”

your eyes glimmered. lando wanted to take a picture of you then, turning from your corner of the window and towards him. your palms smacked the page as you excitedly explained the phenomenon in far too great detail for lando to really pay attention, but he was so engrossed in your intellect and pure passion that slipped past your lips. your sweet, honeyed lips—

“lando?”

“hmm?”

“what will it be like?”

“what?”

“all of it.” your fingers tended around the journal creasing the pages unbeknownst to you. 

lando reached over, not thinking rationally, and grabbed your hands. they were colder than his. he was always warm. so warm. a light gasp left your lips when you looked up at him. 

“i’ll give you some pointers. ready?”

you nodded. 

────────────

he kept a hand on you at all times. unhindered by any sudden movement, feigning to latch at the small divot of your back. you’d grow used to its presence as you scaled the tarmac, hopped into the passenger seat of the mclaren— opened by him— and glanced down at how his hand made claim to the skin of  your thigh the entire drive. 

he’s stressed. you’d tell yourself, not thinking anything more of it. because what else could it be?

────────────

the entire time you kept modesty in mind. you had pestered lando about your choice of attire, thinking specifically about the nature of your outfits. 

“i don’t want to be disrespectful.” you said sternly, looking between the stylist lando paid to dress you, and him. it was your debut at lando’s side and you were determined to make the right choice. you were never usually like this— cold and bullheaded, but he was growing to…enjoy it more than he should. 

you stood there tapping your foot with your arms crossed. you shrugged towards the outfits she provided you. you shook your head at a few and decided to ask. 

“what about orange?”

orange.

lando thought about falling to his knees for you right then and there. to see you sporting his team colors for him was a dream that he would never want to wake from. 

the stylist nodded, raking through the options. there was one that was made of silk, a dress that covered you to the ankles, to the forearms. an abaya it was called. if you were going to be representing lando, which he mentioned on the plane, then you were going to do it right. 

and you’ll be damned before you’re ever wrong. 

────────────

you certainly underestimated the crowds. 

with the season opening, you and lando had been swarmed upon your arrival. he warned you of this, but to which the gravity of it you greatly underestimated. 

your fists bawled at the material of the dress, clenching with unspoken anxiety. you were never much of a public person, but you’d be willing to find out if that were true or not today. 

“hey,” lando nudged your shoulder. you glanced at him with a light smile. “you got this.”

that comfort was enough alone to let you be pulled from the car. lando opened the door for you. immediately swarmed by flashing cameras and the devilish heat of the middle eastern sun. 

questions were thrown at him about you, who you were, and you’d let him do all the talking. 

you straightened your posture, gripped the handbag tightly, and kept a soft smile to your features. 

lando would stop on occasion to sign some memorabilia, which was a perfect time for you to observe. he was kind with the people who were such loyal fans to him. dressed in the mclaren jerseys, hats, he’d sign anything that was thrown his way. even some arms were thrown in his direction. 

it was endearing for you. watching him thrive in his element. your heart warmed at the sight. a new found affection blossoming in the pit of your stomach. 

a thump was heard on the ground before you. you turned, glancing back at lando who kept moving forward. it was a mclaren hat dropped by a teenage girl wrapped in a similar garment to yourself. you traipsed over, crouching down to pick it up, and hand it back to her. 

“here,” you offered in a sweet tone. your smile was brighter. the girl was clearly elated, bouncing on the balls of her feet. 

“are you and lando dating?” came a question from the girl beside her. she was earned a slap to the shoulder, being called rude.

you laughed lightly, shaking your head. “no, no, friends from home is all.”

you saw a phone held up, recording the interaction. but it didn’t scare you. why would it?

“do you want to wrap your hijab? it’ll fly loose in the wind…” the girl asked nervously, placing the mclaren hat on her covered head. you were taken back for a moment, glancing down at the rather lazy job of the stylist, and took intent note that it was rather windy today. it would be hard for you to maintain it by yourself. 

“you would do that for me?” you took a step closer to the barricade, which had lando snapping his head over his shoulder to wonder where you went. 

he ogled, watching as a young girl began tying the ends of the scarf in an intricate, skilled manner around your collarbones, your neck. his eyes were caught on the smile you graced, the laugh that left your lips. it was such a delicious sound, intoxicating, one that he wished to drown in. if that were his fate, he’d gladly accept it. 

his staring was noticed, fans beginning to call his name louder. he swallowed, hands flexing at his side before he signed a few more hats and posters. 

────────────

what you didn’t expect was the way that lando looked in his fire guard suit. the black emblems that contrasted his tan skin, bolstered the tone of his muscles. there was barely anything left up for the imagination as you brought the tip of your finger to your mouth, crossing your legs on the orange couch. you couldn’t seem to sit still. 

“you alright?” he asked out of concern, but you didn’t miss the slight curve of his mouth. he knew what you were thinking.  you were always so responsive to him, so good, even when there were no words transpired. 

“peachy!” you confirmed, sitting back against the couch, your leg bouncing as you tried not to let your eyes meddle on the muscles of his neck, the veins in his hands, the bracelets that dangled from his wrists. 

he gave you a look of doubt before his teammate walked in with a girl at his side. oscar, you remembered. you had met before briefly at a press conference you attended in monaco. the girl beside him was his girlfriend— she was entirely too sweet and studied a similar focus as you did. 

the two mclaren drivers patted each other on the back, while the woman approached you. she sat beside you with a tick of picking at her fingernails.

your hand found its way on top of hers. “first time, too?” 

she nodded and introduced herself formally. you did the same. you laced your fingers with hers, stopping the habit from ruining her lovely nailbeds. 

lando watched the interaction from over oscar’s shoulder, a cheeky smile etching onto his face. oscar caught wind of his inattention, and glanced over his own shoulder briefly. 

he turned back to lando with a toothy grin. “i’ve been trying to get her to stop that habit.”

because within the matter of minutes you were both talking, not once did his girlfriend raise her fingers to her mouth. 

────────────

you pulled and fixed at the collar of his race suit. lando sucked in a low, tight breath. you missed the sound, focused on making sure he looks presentable for the national anthem. it would be any minute he’d climb into the car to do a practice lap. 

when you were satisfied with the result, you dusted off the top of his head and was going to let your hand fall to your side. but there was a stain of soot on his chin. 

without thinking twice, you grabbed his chin between your fingers. his eyes went wide at the action. his fists clenched at his side, body rigid with the feeling of your unexpected touch. 

you licked your thumb before wiping it away, his stubble rough against your fingers. his head crooned visibly into the shape of your hand. the warmth from his cheek getting slightly hotter. heat rushed to your own face, flushing you in your orange dress. 

whatever moment was transpiring between the two of you, you didn’t want it to end. neither did he. his breathing softened, but his heart was pounding. your thumb swirled over his cheek once before you gripped him tighter. 

“you got this, lan.”

there was the first time you graced him with that nickname. the rest was history for him, knowing that he was a dead man walking at your side. if you weren’t going to be his, he would ruin you. such sickening thoughts had him mulling over what you meant to him. you made time out of your busy schedule for him, and so did he. you were there to answer his calls. he was there to be at your beckon and call. he would wreck his entire career if it meant your undivided attention. 

he would pivot, skid, take more reckless actions on the track if it meant having your hands on him. your eyes. your love. he wanted it all with you, he learned, from that first weekend in jeddah. with your communally wrapped headscarf, caring nature, your determination… he wanted it to be his. he wanted you to flourish with him. he wanted to be the reason you blossom. 

with your unwavering strength at his side, he could conquer the world. fuck the championship, he wanted it all to be with you. maddening thoughts would consume him day and night after that first weekend, knowing there was only more to come throughout the season. he could only imagine how these months would fare, but he didn’t bide into fantasies. he would expect the unexpected and let you consume him entirely. 

────────────

miami was everything you thought it to be. bustling with life, parties, music. it was a stark contrast to what your life at university looked like— though you didn’t mind the occasional outing, of course, especially when lando was at your side. 

he was a beam of light crafted by the gods of the sun, brightening every room he stepped in. he was utterly magnetic, drawing others around him, letting them have a joyous laugh. it made you giddy, proud, that he could hold himself so well in the mediocrity of the crowds. while you etched yourself at his side, clamoring for his shadow, he held you tightly at every opportunity. 

his hand at your back, clutching for dear life. warm and soothing, you’d lean into him, clutching the hem of his black mclaren shirt. 

it had been a friday night. his free practices had been stellar as you watched eagerly from the mclaren paddock. you’d earned a status of earning a headset, your consistent attendance rivaling tidal waves in the media. you always told yourself not to look, not to peek, but you couldn’t help it. 

accounts were created in your honor. in your fan name. the mclaren fans loved you, and you loved them. the video of your first appearance at the paddock had gone viral within the community. your sensibility for adhering to culture norms gained you rapport. though you didn’t know why— why wouldn’t you dress appropriately? it grudged you how low the media could stoop, but you were honored nonetheless to gain such positive attention. 

of course there were the negatives. some were born to hate and you could live with that. many thought you were using lando for his money, just another stupid girl who didn’t deserve to be at these races. you kept yourself modest from the media with a private account, similar to charles girlfriend, and found that it was better to remain a mystery to those who weren’t a part of your life. you owed them nothing. 

though you never breathed these negatives to lando. he would be furious and absolutely say something in public. the last thing you wanted was for him to fight your own battles, yet you thought this nothing to be more of a playground spat. you could handle it; lando doesn’t call you sting for no reason. 

on the bright side, you had a steady, growing relationship with oscar’s girlfriend, and even considered each other to be best friends. 

though lando would disagree ardently, reminding you that he was always first, no matter the circumstance. he’d whine like a child and pout. how could you resist that face? even when you would playfully hold up four fingers and raise your brows, his number four, contrary to one, he’d scoff and laugh, your ability to see through him was astonishing. 

at the club tonight there were bottles and bottles of champagne being opened and passed around in the driver's honor. in your time there you had grown close to all drivers, except a few give or take. but while you carved relationships with the boys, it was the women you sought refuge in. 

charles' girlfriend, a tanned brunette sweetheart, would bake for you. in return you would host wine nights with the other women. you’d become accompanied with her new furry companion, little leo leclerc, and you fell in love with him instantly. his little licks of appreciation, his tiny wagging tail. gosh, you loved the pup. 

carlos’ partner, rebecca, had intimidated you at the beginning. she was tall, fierce, blue eyes unwavering with confidence as she spoke of deep experience throughout her years in the paddock. it took her longer to adjust to your presence, feeling doubtful of your friendship with the british driver, but changed her mind when she saw you dehumidifying lando’s race suit that hung in the tents in japan’s humid weather. 

no one stood around you whilst you did that. no one asked you to. you did it because it was ruthlessly hot and you didn’t want lando to contract a heatstroke. 

lily held a place in your heart that none of these girls could truly replace. she was your rock from the first race. you both learned together, wrought each other of the nail biting habits, and laughed amongst the radio calls between the pair of drivers. 

the rap music thundered the floor you stood on. heels tall and encompassing, you’d admit plainly you got used to the treatment lando awarded you. nothing but the best, he told you one evening under the moonlight. the words were imprinted in your mind. 

alexandra, charles’ sweetheart, called your name. 

lando’s grip tensed at your back. you could feel it. you glanced at him, then to alexandra. 

“come dance~!” she swayed, floreale spritz in her hand. she egged you forward with her hand, and you loosened yourself from lando’s side. 

you had no obligation to stay by him. it’s not like you were dating.

though many would disagree with that. 

you mumbled something incomprehensible to lando. he bent his head down towards your mouth, angling his ear to hear your voice. 

“will i see you on the dance floor tonight, mr. norris?” you teased, body warm from the cocktail you downed. his head turned, a signature smirk daunting his face. 

“want me to?” he said, bringing his lips dangerously close to your ear. you shivered, his breath hot and wet as it graced the curves of your cheeks. 

“only if his highness can make time,” you looked up at him through your weary, drunken eyes. something shifted, then, as you stared up at his green eyes. it was dark in the club, but not as dark as his stare. it intimidated you, but not nearly as much as it intrigued you. 

“always make time for you baby,” he said, tone playful and airy but it was more than that for you. baby. he was just drunk, wasn’t he? he didn’t know what he was talking about. didn’t know he was talking to you. don’t let it get to your head. “just tell me when. think charles is dying to dance.”

you looked over your shoulder to see charles being teased by sweet alexandra as she shook her head, pointing at you. this was a girls dance, that told you. 

before you turned, your hand cupped lando’s neck. he grumbled; you felt it through your palm. it was a nonverbal okay. you spun, threading yourself out of lando’s grasp. he let his hand linger for as long as he could before you slipped away, the imprint of his hand leaving you bare and cold. 

it was quickly replaced by the rambunctious action on the dance floor. lit up with multicolored tiles, alexandra grabbed your hand and raised them above your heads, swaying to the heat of the music. 

she was a natural beauty. no wonder charles fell in love with her. 

you mimicked her dance moves to the best of your ability, hands sliding down your waist, through your scalp and over your head. 

alexandra laughed and sashayed, giddy with fun and life. you did the same, unable to withstand her pulsing vibrato. you twirled her around you, she did the same. heads turned at your giggles, a few grunts of laughs had you looking over your shoulder. 

the men of the club began to swarm. but in the moment, you didn’t care. let them gawk if they so wish. you felt untouchable. 

your body slid parallel to alexandra, hips gyrating with an orbit of its own cosmic makeup. she grabbed onto your waist pulling you close when you rocked from side to side. your hands slid up your neck, down your chest— exposed from the evening gown you chose for the evening festivities. 

the swarm intensified. one man attempted to twirl in front of you and alexandra, reaching to touch your forearm, but that’s where the line was drawn. 

a body pushed itself between you and the man, alexandra standing up straight behind you. you recognized him instantly— signature smell bringing you an insatiable comfort that soothed your soul. 

lando stood before you, face close to yours. he didn’t look pissed off…just…cocky?

before alexandra peeled away, you tilted your head back to her shoulder. she whispered, “needy, needy, needy…”

charles whisked her away for a dance. you didn’t get to respond. there wasn’t much for you to say though, watching how happy alexandra became when charles wrapped his arms around her. you felt sour. what was this feeling? 

“you didn’t ask me,” he said into your ear, bringing your attention back to him. little to your knowledge he watched as you glanced between the happy ferrari couple, your face scrunching and hand coming to cover your lips. 

you gave him a quizzical look. 

“to dance!” he laughed, big and goofy. but there was an edge to his tone. was he peeved? did he think that you forgot about him?

“wanted you to come get me.” you slurred, lifting your arms to throw them over his muscled shoulders. when you were met with a hard surface. your eyes bulged at just how big he’s gotten this year alone. it made you want to touch him more, explore his body behind the polo mclaren shirt. 

he raised his brows at you. “yeah?”

you pursed your lips together, letting your eyes flutter. “wanted you to hunt me down, little lando.”

his hands fell to your hips, fingertips functioning your skin. his demeanor shifted. your words igniting such a vicious flame inside his heart that burned for you and you alone. you were practically fucking edging him with your words. he wished it was the other way around. how insatiable your screams could be, the little noises you’d make. 

you warmed even more when his head dove into your neck, lips parting so you could feel his tongue. “‘ve already got you.”

“do you?” you challenge. lando loves a good challenge. 

he tucked you against his body, saying nothing more. 

“dance with me.” it wasn’t a question. but a statement. 

rolling your eyes, annoyed that he didn’t answer you, you pivoted on your heel. your back against his abdomen. you’d surely regret this on the morrow, but that was a problem for then. now, you only felt sturdy as you leaned your weight into lando. he supported you with ease. 

dancing with him was always the easy part. he knew how to move his body, sway his hips, and lure any girl into the trap of his toned and tanned arms. but it was never you up until now. you’d always dance with the other drivers, girls, friends, but never him. it was something far too intimate for you, but you weren’t sure how lando thought about it. 

but your friends noticed. 

rebecca snuck up behind alexandra, carlos at her arm. 

“look at him,” she gestured to lando who was entirely smitten with your let-loose expression. his hands were tight around your hips, legs spread to cage you against him. a fortress came with the name lando norris, and you were his queen. 

“entirely in love.” rebecca concluded, and alexandra agreed with a nod. 

“you should talk to her.” charles suggested, clearly feeling the pain his friend was going through, yearning at a distance. 

“and say what, char?” alexandra asked her partner. “do you love him like he loves you?”

“is that a bad idea?” charles retorted and was met with silence between the two girls. 

“we’ll figure something out.”

against your bodice, you felt the hard imprint of his dick blistering against his jeans. but it didn’t frighten you, not like his touches used to. your tour of the grand prix’s continued your closeness amongst one another, so…

your hips continued to sway, egged on by how lando ran his arms up your waist. it felt good–his hands, the tension woven into them. he felt good. 

you turned around to face him, letting your hands wrap around his neck. he looked euphoric beneath the dim lighting, rbg hues collectively making him look like he was glowing. he was, in truth, because of you. always because of you. 

the two of you were making eye contact now. not just any, but you thought it was the most intense of your life. his eyes rimmed with red, exhaustion you thought, and you suddenly felt guilty for keeping him out for so long. it’s not like you weren’t tired yourself. 

you raised your head to his ears. “we should go.”

he narrowed his eyes, looking disappointed that the festivities were ending so soon. “you want to?”

your head nodded. one hand came down to brush against his hand, taking it between yours. “tired.” 

the alcohol had taken its course through you. head pounding with a soft thump, you clasped your hand with lando’s. he returned the same force, swiping his thumb over your knuckles. he didn’t hesitate when you said you were tired. that was that for him. he had no other reason to stay.

“just wanna say bye to them,” you said, making your way over to rebecca and alexandra. they turned to you when you had lando in tow, entirely at your whims. 

“we’re meeting tomorrow?” you confirmed. both girls nodded, a shared glance between them making you feel uneasy. alexandra told you to come to ferrari’s paddock. you’d nod your head before they both raised their brows at each other again, sheepish smiles flashing in your direction. 

“what?” you prodded. they smiled at you again. 

“nothing. we just can’t wait for tomorrow.” rebecca soothed your concerns, though it didn’t prevail as much as you hoped. 

“that was weird.” lando said into your ear when you were close to the exit. 

“right?” you were glad he noticed. he always noticed these things. too observant for his own good. 

before you stepped foot out of the club, you turned back when you felt a thump. like a body had fallen to the ground. you stopped in your tracks. 

the man that grabbed your arm laid face flat on the ground. lando looked down at you, looking smug. though he didn’t hit him.

“must’ve tripped.” he shrugged. 

“should watch where he’s going.” you said, knowing that he didn’t just trip.

“guess so.”

────────────

saturday afternoon you were standing beside rebecca and alexandra when qualifying started. you wore a casually chic outfit. pants, a shirt, matching accessories. the stylist lando hired was getting to know you better. she understood what patterns you liked, your sense of aesthetic. it felt like a homecoming. 

“so,” alexandra crossed her legs as all three of you sat on the couch. “what happened with lando last night?”

you were taken back. “what do you mean?”

they exchanged a look. 

“you left together!” rebecca held up her hands as if pointing out the obvious. she was, really. 

“so…?” 

“so…! he went back to your room?” alexandra pleaded in wanting to know details. details of an extravagant night that didn’t happen. 

“we share a hotel room,” they gasped. your hands thrown up in defense. “not like that! he gets two bedrooms for us.” 

the girls settled, not looking entirely pleased. 

“besides,” you sighed. “we’re friends. he doesn’t see me like that.”

so confident

alexandra and rebecca burst out in a laugh. “are you serious?” alexandra wondered. 

you bristled, brow raised, wondering what she meant. “yes…?”

rebecca sighed your name, “have you seen the way he looks at you–?”

“or how he follows you around like a puppy.”

“how he pays for everything for you.”

“oh! how he scares any man off who tries to talk to you.”

your mind went numb. is this true? you thought lando was like that with everyone– kind, considerate, conscious. but as you sat there considering their words, just wondering how much truth was attached to them. 

“are…are you sure?” you hesitated about finding the answer. what would that mean for you? 

“absolutely.”

“one hundred percent.” they said at the same time. so this is what they wanted to talk about.

shit. maybe you were blind. it had gotten tempestuous over the course of these last few months. his growing attentiveness, his softness, his eager eyes whenever you’d make him coffee in the morning. no one makes it as good as you, he’d say. 

would it be so bad that you…weren’t upset with it? you loved being friends with lando. he was always there to listen to you, support you. he cherished your time together. but what if there was a slim chance that you were wrong? that you were in over your head? 

the last thing you wanted was to be embarrassed. 

“what do i do?”

the ferrari girlfriends exchanged looks. 

────────────

lando qualified in fifth for the miami grand prix. you thought he did absolutely wonderful. it was a close quali, he was pushing his car to its limits, but it wasn’t enough in the final stretch. a sigh left you as you were watching the tv, lily at your side. 

oscar placed just below lando at sixth. “i don’t get it,” you said.

lily looked at you, confused. 

“they should be faster. mathematically, i mean.”

lily was an engineering graduate. the question you brought forth had her perking up. you could see the cogs turning in her head. 

“the physical body of the car offsets it.” she tapped her thumb against her elbow, arms crossed. she raised a hand to bite at her thumb, but you stopped her. 

“you’re right. i don’t know–” you just had a weird feeling about this race. about lando. what rebecca and alexandra said…”lily.”

“yeah?”

“do…” you took a light breath in, suddenly intimidated by the answer you could receive. “do you think lando is in love with me?

a beat of silence.

“without a doubt.”

the mclaren plated with number four rolled into the garage. lando jumped out, taking off the neck guard, then his helmet. his hair had gotten longer this month. curls were starting to frame over his forehead. his stubble was more prominent. he was tanner. had his jawline always been that sharp?

he patted his engineer on the back but was looking for something. his eyes were darting all around the room, concern beginning to encompass his face. until he found you and lily, you, in the corner with her. you looked absolutely beautiful today. you had been worried about your outfit, wondering if the colors were too contrasting, or if they washed you out. 

lando didn’t think there was any color that could wash out the beauty of your skin. you were too bright for that, always glowing.

when you saw him, you beamed. but it was different this time. the way he looks at you. how is he looking at me?

he took a few steps forward before you met him half way. your fingers found the zipper to his jumper, the action was new for you and lando. he welcomed it, looking down at you with a smile. 

“you did amazing.” you breathed, undoing the zipper. though you couldn’t reach his eyes with your own. your hand shook against the zipper. he noticed, face falling with a slight frown. 

“are you alright?” 

“perfect,” you answered a bit too quickly. you still haven’t looked at him. you went to turn away, but he grabbed your elbow with a light grip. 

“hey, look at me.” he pleaded, voice entirely too soft and gentle for your state right now. the way he follows you around like a puppy. but why did you blush? why did you fiddle with your fingers, bite your lip? 

you looked up into those lovely pools of green. they shimmered so elegantly. your breath caught in your throat. 

“what happened? did–”

“do you want dinner tonight?” you blurted, suddenly feeling stupid and small. you kept shrinking with each passing second that he didn’t answer. little did you know, he felt like the earth was flipped on his head. was he dreaming? did you ask to have dinner with him? surely you just meant with all of your friends…

“we always have dinner,” he said with a light laugh. you felt shivers creep up your arms. Goosebumps.

“me. just you and me.”

“oh.” oh? that’s all that lando could say? yes. that was it. his brain was short circuiting, unsure of what you were inferring. was there a deeper meaning to this? was he thinking too hard? you’ve gotten dinner just the two of you before. but not in a long time. 

he was absolutely speechless as he looked at you, heart racing in his chest. It was just about to pop out when you opened your mouth to retract your statement and apologize. 

“what’s the dress code?” he bit his lip to hold back his childlike grin. 

“fancy.” you snipped back, feeling entirely too giddy that he seemed to come alive once again. you thought he would reject the idea, a part of you hoped that he did– silly, right? but you were terrified of confrontation. confrontation that rebecca and alexandra could be right. 

“fancy?” he said, taking a step closer to you.

“did i stutter?” your tone was playful as you raised your brows. his tongue got caught on his teeth as he pursed his lips. 

“wanted to make sure i get to see you in a dress.” the comment slipped from his lips easily, suavely. you blushed again. he noticed, surely. it was a rare occurrence that you blushed, even rarer for him to be the reason. what was this feeling in his chest? pride? pride that he could be the one to make you bashful. he felt like a king, wanting to conquer the skirts of your heart. 

“maybe i’ll let you pick it out.” 

lando’s face couldn’t light up any further. what did he do to award such treatment? such…such…god, he was entirely enamored with you. there was not a moment that went by that he didn’t wish you were his. he wanted this to be the norm. whatever it was. was it a date? was he supposed to hold your hand, kiss you? god, god, god, if he got to kiss you…

“deal.”

you were back in the hotel in an instant. the clock read 6pm, and you told lando no later than 7:30. both of you were in the kitchen filling up your bottles of water, cracking jokes between each other. when you were refreshed and relaxed, you spoke. 

“still picking my dress?” you lead him to the door to your room, opening it for him. he followed behind you without a second thought. his eyes weary, glossy. like he was about to cry or something. 

you stood at the doorway to the room. it was a chaotic mess of clothes, ruined sheets, open bottles of water. if lando noticed the state, he didn’t say anything. thank god. 

but he did

lando was keen on noticing every detail of how you lived. your habits. it was the only way he could figure out how your mind worked– the spectacular thing that it was. he turned his head over his shoulder to you, gesturing towards the closet. you nodded. 

he opened the door to the closet, dresses hanging by the dozens. damn, the stylist really put her money’s worth, didn’t she? rather his money, but if it meant for you to look jaw-droppingly stunning, who was he to complain? 

the british driver ran his fingers through the numerous dresses before him. different combinations of cotton, silk, satin. they all felt different at his fingertips, yet you would always be sweet to him. but something else caught his attention–

a lace bodice piece, lingerie, that hung low from a hanger. he waited a beat. another. he pulled it with both his hands, showing you the hanger with a curious, raised brow. 

you flushed.

never in your life did you run as fast as you just had. you tried to snatch the hanger from him, but he held it high above your head. he was laughing. 

“lando!” you screeched, trying to climb up his body to reach it. it only incited a more intense laugh from him. he hummed.

“what’s this for, then? hmm?” 

“i–” you stuttered, not really being able to know what to say. “she gave it to me!” the stylist.

his laugh quieted. “did she?”

“yes! if, you know, i dunno–” you rubbed your arms together anxiously. “if i ever met a guy. or something. it was stupid!”

you tried to get it back from him. he didn’t relent. you stomped your foot. 

“lan, please…” you whispered, looking up at him with his unreadable stare. lando was always the type to know how he felt through his eyes, but now…you didn’t know what you were looking at. 

“did you?”

“did i what?” you huffed, crossing your arms.

“meet a guy?” 

you looked away, embarrassed. “no. not like i was trying, though.”

he relaxed, noticeably. 

keeping all these guys away from you…

“it was just a fun idea. now will you pick something? else i’ll change my mind.” you threaten him. he hung the lingerie piece back up, surrendering instantly. 

you headed to the on-suite bathroom, starting to get ready for your night out. though his tone echoed in your mind– “did you?” – he sounded…deflated. bested, by some indomitable force. you had a growing epiphany that the ferrari girls were right, and you were just too damn scared to admit that such a beautiful man could be interested in you of all people. 

lando knocked on the door frame, watching as you finished up your look. you glanced at him through the mirror, then turning to see the dress he held. it was a long, black dress with lace flowers embroidered into it. it even had sleeves, lace ones, that could keep you warm with the miami breeze. it got rather chilly when the sun went down. 

his choice was rather impressive. dare you say that you liked it. you grabbed the fabric piece from him, taking it off the hanger and leaving it on the counter. it was beautiful– must’ve cost a fucking fortune– breathtaking, though. 

did you even deserve to wear something so elegant? 

“gimme a sec,”  you said, shooing him out of the bathroom before you changed. the dress slipped on with ease, much to your shock. but its downside–the zipper. you tried for about three seconds to get it up in the back, but you gave up.

you opened the door. 

“lan?” you called for him, voice whimpering for his attention. he shifted from your bed, scrolling on his phone. he looked up immediately, eyes widening at the site before him. you were absolutely breathtaking. his hands twitched, desperate to touch you. 

and you weren’t opposed, you thought, given your insolence towards any patience you had for the zipper. ‘test the waters,’ is what alexandra had said to you when you asked her for advice. ‘see how he reacts.’ rebecca followed up. 

testing the waters

that’s what you were doing

you turned your back to him, shimmying out of the bathroom. “zip me?”

“yeah. yeah of course.” he launched to his feet. the dress was so low down the curve of your back. he wanted to trace your spine with his fingers. he was gentle with his touch, warm to the skin. you absentmindedly leaned into him, back arching. 

he zipped the piece with ease, letting his fingers trace the back of your neck. you shivered, goosebumps crawling up your shoulders. he felt them, quickly glancing at the side of your face to gauge your reaction. was he going crazy? your body was so receptive to him. it was addictive. 

you pulled away. his hands felt empty, your back felt cold. 

“thanks,” you smiled bashfully, unable to look him in the eyes. so fucking cute, he thought. “go get dressed, will you? i’m getting hungry.” 

lando bolted from the room, and you managed a short laugh to yourself. while you were alone, you glanced at yourself in the mirror. you still felt entirely undeserving of such a gown. 

you slipped on your shining black heels and had to adjust to their feeling. you were never good at walking in them, but this tour was a playground for you to learn how. you wanted to learn. you felt badass walking around like you had pointy claws. 

in your hands was a matching leather clutch, simple and handheld. you waited patiently for lando, though it took him barely no time at all to look so put together. 

you heard the clink of his loafers before he made himself known. turning around, you got a good look at the man you’ve gotten to know over these past few months. 

it was chilling the way your body electrified. heat pooled in your lower belly, tingling with lust. he was dressed in a black dress shirt, few buttons undone revealing his chains, with a black jacket and taupe pants. his loafers were black with a silver buckle at the center of each shoe. 

he was fiddling with the cufflinks at his jacket when he noticed you gawking at the shape of his abdomen, to his exposed neck. he didn’t want to say a word, afraid that it’d break your moment of admiration. that you would never look at him in such a…virtuous manner. 

but he could never control his tongue. 

“my eyes are up here, darling.” you snapped your head up, blushing. you crossed your legs over each other, leaning against the kitchen isle. 

darling

you were caught red handed. there’s no point in pretending. your blood burned hot in your veins, the petname coming as second nature from his lips. you wanted to hear it again. 

“didn’t know you cleaned up so well.” you pushed off of the isle with ease, waiting for him to join your side. “used to all the sweat and pajamas.” 

he tsked at you, sheepish at your witty remarks. he hoped that no matter what it would always be like this; you and him, full of banter and fun. 

“and you look…agreeable.” his smile was bright, mischievous. you pushed his arm away as he came to rest his hand on your lower back. “kidding!” 

he lowered his voice and connected your eyes with his. “you’re breathtaking.”

and for the first time, you believed him.

────────────

the restaurant he chose was more than you could imagine. with high ceilings, a valet, lights in the shape of mystical orbs strung together on the walls. the floors were made of marble, the tiling on the sidings were matte black. 

but lando didn’t give a fuck about the decorations. he was staring at you. you in your beautiful dress, carrying yourself so elegantly. you were born to fit into this life, whether or not you believe you deserve it. he would do anything to prove that you did. that you were worthy of every dime he spent. 

“right this way, madam.” the waiter ushered you, but you didn’t move until you held out your hand for lando to grab. you’ve never asked him to sober. 

he didn’t hesitate, never did, and latched onto your hand with a warming grip. you tugged him along through the restaurant while he kept getting distracted from you and how you walked so well in those high heeled shoes. he remembers a time when you couldn’t. and look at you now.

the waiter seated you at your two person table. lando pulled out the chair for you. you smiled appreciatively. 

“aren’t you the gentleman.” you acknowledged his kindness, his face brightening as he seated himself with ease. he pulled into the table, leaning over it. you did the same, eager to meet his face with a bashful smile and your hands rubbing together. 

lando looked nervous, but most of all happy. he is happy. to be sitting here with you, in your presence, and most of all, you wanted to be here with him. he didn’t miss how you leaned towards him, your legs crossing over one another as the point of one of your heels grazed his knee. 

“so tell me,” he picked up his water glass, taking a sip. you watched the way his adam’s apple bobbed, the water running through him. you gulped. “why dinner?”

your hand touched the back of your neck. “‘m not allowed to want to spend time with you?”

“didn’t say that, did i?” he placed the glass down. “all this, i mean–” he gestured to your dress, his shirt, the restaurant. “you tryin’ to tell me something, darling?”

one of your fingers ran over your lip. darling. god, it sounded so good coming from him. it put you in such a state of heaven, feeling entirely weightless in his presence. you were staring at him speechless, before you heard a clatter of glass behind you. you were ripped from the safety of your trance. 

“maybe,” you muttered, looking away for him briefly before attempting to switch the topic. “anyways-”

“what was that?” he said languidly, the softness of his tone unrecognizable. his eyes were blown wide, taking in every subtle movement that you made. you felt like you were under a microscope being analyzed by his prerogative. you felt stripped bare– but that wasn’t such a bad thing, was it? no. no it wasn’t. the thought had you blushing. what weren’t you blushing about today?

“the race,” you continued on, disregarding his questioning. “are you nervous?”

he leaned back in his chair in defeat. fine, if she wanted to play it that way. he knew exactly what you said. but he wanted to hear it again. he will hear it again if it is the last thing he ever hears. you said “maybe” and didn’t brush him off with a scoff. his advances towards you had always been playful and light, but you never indulged him so…earnestly. he was caught off guard. in fact, he’s been caught off guard…a lot these past few days. something has shifted–

but what?

“am i supposed to be?” he wondered. you never really asked him those kinds of things. he always had your full reassurance. 

“no. it’ll be just like any other, won’t it?” you felt like you were talking out of your fucking ass. you, all of a sudden, didn’t know how to talk to your best friend. it was gibberish, dry, god, how the fuck did he put up with you beforehand? 

you began fidgeting with your fingers. his eyes latched on the movement. 

“are you nervous?”

you swallowed the lump in your throat, unable to look at him. you didn’t know he leaned in again until you felt his knees bump with yours. you jumped, but sunk into his light touch. 

“i dunno– no? no, why would i be nervous?” you continued fidgeting. “it’s just…it’s all so dangerous, isn’t it? i’ve done the math before. at your speed if–”

“hey.” he cut you off, grabbing both your hands. “hey.” he breathed, looking at you with his widened, sparkling green eyes. your hands were sweaty against his, a byproduct of your anxiety, but he didn’t seem to care when he brought them to his lips, gracing you with a sweet kiss on the top of your palms. 

your breath hitched in your throat. 

“didn’t know that you worried about me so much.” he gave you a light laugh, his eyes crinkling with a smile. he bit his lip. 

“what? of course i do,” you looked at him in disbelief, your hands still held in his. “i mean– why wouldn’t i? we’re friends, aren’t we?”

‘aren’t we?’ was branded into lando’s heart. he swallowed, pulling back and letting your hands fall to the table. “‘course we are.”

“you are both such a beautiful couple.” your waiter approached. you bristled, glanced quickly to lando, and an idea bloomed in your head. test the waters, the girls said. “what can i get for you lovebirds?”

lando sat up straight to correct him, but you stopped him. “you are too kind,” polite smile was gracing as you ran your fingers over the menu. “what are the specials?”

lando’s jaw dropped. he shut it before the flies flew in, but he wouldn’t forget this. no amount of alcohol or fantasies could recreate that feeling. this feeling. you glanced at him while you were ordering, puckering your lips. 

god, he wanted to kiss you. Ruin you. make you his.

dinner went smoothly despite a perpetuous tension lingering over the pair of you. you’ve never fiddled so much before with anything; your dress, napkin, glass. but you were still there with him, and he always knew the perfect way to make you laugh. you wanted to kiss him that night, beneath the glimmer of the moon, but you couldn’t do it. you couldn’t muster the courage to break the barrier. 

but you would, in time.

on your way out of the restaurant you were keen on grabbing his hand first. you felt him tense and he covered his mouth with his free hand, surely hiding a cheeky smile. 

the cameras were flashing when you came down the steps. you’d be trending on every social media platform, especially with how bright your smile was, and how tightly you gripped his hand. 

────────────

race mornings were always chaotic. but you somehow managed to make it to the track at the end of the f2 race with lando at your side. In the mclaren hospitality room, you straightened his collar of the fireguard, taking a deep inhale of his subtle cologne and natural scent. you felt dizzy, struck by the desire to run your hands over his chest. 

your touch lingered longer than it normally did. he noticed. what didn’t he notice?

especially after your stunt last night. he didn’t get a wink of sleep. he was up all night staring at his phone, watching the pictures light up his feed. he wasn’t embarrassed, shocked, nor ashamed. the british driver was entirely elated. with your graceful composure, assuredness in holding him at your side. 

he scrolled through the comments, too, but there was not one negative thing he could find. spare a few comments that he had to bite his tongue on responding to, you were gaining an overwhelming amount of support from his fans.

your fans.

there were accounts made in your honor. outfit accounts, update accounts, people with your face as their profile picture. he scrolled through every one of them. he was maddeningly obsessed. 

but what changed? why were you acting this way? not that he was upset by this change…but your inability to tell him…tell him what was going on frightened him. he felt anxious. 

“what’s going on with you?” he brought his face closer to yours, lowering his voice so no one else could hear the both of you. 

“nothing. it’s nothing.” your tone was hastened, weary. 

“it doesn’t sound like–” 

“we’re ready for you, lando.” his engineer interrupted the two of you with a polite smile. 

the british driver sighed. 

you placed your hands on his chest. “i’m fine.” though it did little to soothe his woes. 

he looked at you weary eyed, brows turnt upward with concern. he didn’t believe you. 

“i just…” your hand trailed up his neck, thumb caressing his bottom lip. he stayed perfectly still beneath your fingertips. “really want you to win.” 

you placed a soft kiss on his opposite cheek. 

“you got this, lan.” 

he kissed your thumb that was on his lips and said nothing else before he jumped into the mclaren.

────────────

you were on absolute edge the entire race. it was an uphill battle. you’ve never been seen so anxious with your headset on, tapping your feet anxiously against the concrete. arms crossed over your chest, it was down to the last few laps. lando had been hard running in first.

first. lando was in first. 

you could feel this in your blood. he was born for this.  

and when he crossed that fucking finish line, you’ve never felt so much joy in your entire life. 

he yipped and punched his fist in the air, his screams were pure music to your ears. 

his engineers came to pat you on the back, gauging your all too excited reaction. lily was at your side, too, jumping and giving you a hug. 

lando jumped from his parked car, ripping off his helmet and neck guard. he was on top of the fucking world when he jumped atop the crowd of mclaren workers, them holding him up with ease and chanting his name. 

you stood beside lily, hand covering your mouth to stifle your sobs. you couldn’t be more proud of him than in this moment. 

he caught your eye from above the crowd, watching the tears fall down your face. when he jumped off his celebratory pile, he ran over to you. 

you threw your arms around his neck, launching yourself against him. he caught you, he always would, and held you tight. he would never let you go. never. your tears wet the base of his neck.

“lando…” you said into his race suit that smelled of burnt rubber and sweat. you didn’t care. this was your lando. 

he pulled back, looking at you with concern. it was a characteristic look for him these past few days. 

but you wanted that to go away. 

you wanted nothing but his happiness. his joy. his passions. to see him on top of the world. but you wanted to be right there with him, side by side. 

your lips were on his before he blinked. he was taken back, surprised, and face dripping in sweat. your hands gripped around his muscular neck, tugging him to you. you wanted more. you wanted this. this over anything. him over anything. 

he returned your kiss when he was done pinching himself. your lips were entirely too sweet. luckily he had a sweet tooth. 

his hand cupped the back of your head, tilting you towards him for a better, deeper angle. you moaned into him as he sucked on your bottom lip, teeth grazing the sensitive skin. you were floating, floating in the world of lando norris. you never wished to return to the ground. 

but you did. the cheers around you got louder. you realized you would too if this kept up.

the new grand prix winner wasn’t finished, though, when his free hand gripped your hip. you stifled a giggle by smiling into his mouth, catching your breath. “lan,” you chuckled. 

“don’t tell me this is a dream.” he had tears swelling in his eyes, lips plump from your kiss. “i might just have to–”

you cupped his cheek. 

“real.” you assured him. “i’m real. this–” you brought his gloved hand to your heart. “is real.”

he bit his lip, though it did little to conceal his smile. 

“drink some champagne for me.”

he kissed you once more. a telltale we aren’t done. 

and you sure as hell weren’t. 

────────────

“don’t understand why we’re celebrating out there,” lando gestured to the door as you were putting your heels on in a hurry. “when we could be here.” he pulled you to him, your back flushed against his chest. you leaned into him, sighing. 

“because your friends want to celebrate,” you finished putting on your shoes. “me included.”

lando’s hand tightened around your waist. “you’re not my friend.”

your brows upturned when you spun around to face him. your expression was sickeningly innocent. “‘m not?” your hands landed on his chest, turning your head to the side with fluttering lashes. 

“absolute minx,” lando seethed with a hearty laugh, leaning in to kiss you. your noses brushed together, his lips coming to graze yours. but you smiled and pulled away from him before he could taste your lipstick. 

he made a move to pull you back to him by your elbow, but you gave him a look. “we’re going to your celebrations, lan. don’t care what you have t’say.”

he groaned, his head falling forward to your shoulder. your hands raked through his hair, down the back of his neck. he practically purred like a fucking kitten under your fingertips. 

“and as far as i know,” you kissed his temple. “we’re still friends. haven’t asked me to be your girlfriend, did you?” your hands curled in his hair, pulling him to meet your eye. he bit his lip, blushing!

“you’re blushing, baby!” you cooed, reaching to squeeze one of his cheeks. 

“can’t blame me,” he muttered, head darting back into the crook of your neck and leaving soft kisses down to your collarbones. “the most beautiful woman has her hands all over me…what am i supposed to do with m’self?” he chuckled and you felt his teeth against your sensitive skin. you sucked in a breath with a smile. 

“ask her,” you lowered your voice, whispering into him. “i’m sure she’ll say yes.”

“would she?” his head perked up, flushed and warm from your neck.

“in every universe, lan.”  your humorous tone turned serious. he gulped, adam’s apple bobbing when he felt the weight of your words. “you know that gravity is the only force that can travel through any dimension? any time, any place, it will be found.”

he was listening to you intensely, voice cracking as he spoke. “i would find you.” 

your eyes widened at him. 

“through any black hole, space phenomena, wormhole,” his breath fanned your cheeks. “i’ll always find you.”

you leaned in to kiss him. he met you halfway, swallowing your mouth with his. you let him push you up against the counter, your hand gripping the ledge so you didn’t tumble over. you opened your mouth and his tongue slipped in without hesitating. he explored the corners of your mouth, the shapes of your teeth, your own tongue. 

your moan was deep from your chest when you felt his hand start to slip up your thigh. his pinky scathing the fabric of your thin underwear. you gasped when he ran trailed over your cunt, already wet and swollen under his touch.

"all for me, baby?" he chuckled into your neck, soothing your cunt of its tumultuous ache.

you nodded, but that wasn't enough.

"words. need words."

"fuck. yes, lan, all for you." you moaned when he flexed a finger inside of you, the sweet burn was tender to your growing coil in your belly. but things just can't go smoothly, can they?

you were brought back to earth when your phone began to ring. fuck. 

you tried pushing lando off of you, but he grumbled against your lips. you smiled, but detached from him. “lan,” he shook his head, refusing to let you go. “lan, it’s probably everyone wondering where you are.”

“don’t care.”

“you should.” 

“don’t.” his mind didn’t change, finger still exploring you before you shook him off.

you kissed the tip of his nose. “we won’t stay for long, okay? besides…”

there was a sheepish look on your face. “i have a boyfriend to show off.” 

lando didn’t need to be told twice to get you swept off your feet and into his car. 

────────────

the entire drive there his hand was on your thigh, so high that he traced the lining of your black laced underwear with his pinky. you gripped his wrist tightly, but said nothing the entire ride there. 

when you pulled up, a valet man opened the door for you. you stepped out and were met with ten times the amount of flashing cameras that you were used to. you got this. with a straight posture and elegant– as elegant as you could muster– composure, you waited for lando to meet at your side. 

you weren’t disappointed when you felt his hand on your lower back, guiding you through the crowds. shouts were sent your way, his way; “lando! lando! is this your girlfriend? are you dating? what’s her name?”

he made sure to answer only one question with your nod of approval before he climbed the steps to the nightclub. 

“lando! is this your girlfriend?”

“yes,” he said with his charming nature, turning back to look at you, starstruck by your beauty. you smiled back at him, hand caressing his chest. the cameras went wild at your natural pose with each other. 

inside the club was much better. with a restricted guest list of close friends and family, you were at ease. when you entered you were met with all three of your closest girlfriends. lily, rebecca, and alexandra. they squealed when they saw you, sprinting in your direction leaving their boyfriends in distress by their absence. 

“congratulations, lando!” lily said upon her arrival first, then glancing to you. “and an even more congratulations is in order? are you fucking kidding me!” she said with utter glee. you leaned further into lando’s side if that was possible. he relaxed at your touch, hand loose at your hip. 

“i knew it.” rebecca said with certainty. 

“she really did,” alexandra confirmed. 

you rolled your eyes at the pair of them. 

“i’ll get us drinks, baby.” lando whispered into your ear, his nose jutting against your hair. he gave you a kiss to your head and departed from your side, meeting up with the guys, too. 

“tell us everything!” alexandra jumped up and down. 

“there’s not much to tell.” you shrugged, hands thrown up in defense. “i just thought about what you said. you were right. i was so, so blind.” wasted time was a fear of yours.

“we’re proud of you anyways. have you seen all the paparazzi for you?” rebecca opened her phone, scrolling endlessly through her timeline. “i fucking hate you. you look perfect in every one of them.” 

“oh please,” you brushed her off. “have you looked in a mirror, becca?” 

it was a stellar night. you found yourself on the dance floor shortly after with your favorite drink in your hand, per lando’s stellar memory of your order. 

without another moment longer, your hips were moving over lando’s on the dance floor, his hands loose on your hips as he ran them up and down your body. you decided you weren’t going to have more than one drink tonight, preferring to remember every moment of this celebration.

the song was a bumping rap tune, easy to follow along with your suave moves. “suave,” you were just letting loose against your now boyfriend. the word was still foreign to you, but you felt increasingly giddy at the mention. 

lando, though? he was a changed man. not only did your kiss bring him ultimate luck before his race, he now has you at his side. he’ll do anything to keep you there. fuck, how did he get so lucky? he had a feeling something was going on, but never would he think it would be your lips on his after his race. he can still taste your tears.

you cried for him the entire time he was up on that podium, absolutely relishing in the national anthem played in his honor. and he could only keep his eyes on you. your glittering, magnificent eyes that sparkled beneath the miami sun. they sparkled for him, only him, on this marvelous day. 

and he would let everyone know that you shined for him. that you were his. while he may have won his first race, you were better than any trophy he could ever get. 

eventually, everyone raised their glasses for lando and cheer’s to his victory. you held your glass high, downing the entire thing. he did the same, only keeping to a few so he could see you as clear as day. he felt the same way…he never wanted to forget a moment with you. 

you faced him now, body still swaying to the music. with your chest brushing against his, you felt a growing heat over your neck. as the night went on, the sweatier lando became. the more his tanned skin glowed beneath the hue of the lights. the more his cologne pumped through your nose. it was impossible to not be intoxicated by him, drunk on his affection. 

with your hands gripping his neck, you looked up to him through your hooded eyes, a look that he wished he could take a fucking picture of. 

“what?” he said into your ear. 

you only shifted closer into him if that was possible. 

“need me, baby?” he chuckled low and wicked. you shifted on your feet, tightening your legs together. you almost did before lando stuck his leg out, having you tightened around him.

you nodded rapidly into his neck, clutching the fabric of his shirt. it was an appropriate time to leave, too, given that many have already bid their goodbyes. lando was only sticking around for you, after all. “please,” you whimpered into his ear, mouth wetting the skin beneath his chin. 

“fuck.” he cursed, maneuvering your body towards the exit with ease. his hands felt so good around you. you wanted them everywhere all the time. 

you bid your farewells to your friends with haste, feeling a slight guilt for leaving so…suddenly.

but lando didn’t. 

the drive back to the hotel took no time at all, lando blowing through every fucking stop sign and light that came in his direction. his hand was firm on your thigh this time, white knuckling the steering wheel. you stared at him, his side profile. he was too irresistible like this–needy, urgent– so you leaned over to kiss the side of his face, down his neck with sensual, puckering kisses.

he leaned his head back, giving you access to his thick neck. you had no idea how he kept focus on the road, but you had full faith in him to get back unscathed. 

“i know, baby,” he sighed, low and deep. “almost there.”

pulling into the valet, you opened the door yourself. lando threw the keys up in the air to the doorman and proceeded to rush you through the lobby. you couldn’t contain your giggles when he kept pressing the elevator button over and over. 

“that doesn’t make it any faster, you know.” you commented, your own foot tapping against the cool marble of the ground. 

“i’ll show you fast, baby, watch your mouth.” chills ran up your spine. your legs clenched together again and you couldn’t meet his eye. 

bastard. 

when the elevator opened, you shuffled inside and he had you against the wall before you could catch your breath. his lips attacked yours, moving down to your jawline, peppering your neck with slower, intense kisses. you moaned, biting your lip to conceal the sound the best you could. 

he moved to your chest, your collarbones being the first to be victim of his biting kiss. he would bruise the skin atop your breasts, marks for only him to gawk at. it looks like you won’t be getting any miami sun any time soon. or ever if his swirling tuck keeps suckling against your skin. 

“fuck, lan.” you whimpered, looking down at him below you, hands cupping his neck in place. he would happily be imprisoned by you like this. he would never go hungry. 

he groaned at your breathless response, adhering heavily to his actions as he didn’t miss an inch of your skin with his sloppy kisses. you pulled at the curly hair of his scalp that had his eyes rolling back into his head. you watched the delectable sight, your panties becoming increasingly damp as the seconds rolled by. 

the doors to your floor opened. lando didn’t move for a moment. you pulled his head back from his devouring of your skin. “you’re fucking me in your bed or not at all.” 

“you’re the death of me, darling.”

you were swept across the floors of your hotel, lando fumbling with the key to the room anxiously. you kissed up his neck in anticipation until the door clicked open and you were practically tossed inside. he slammed the door shut, throwing the “do not disturb” sign on the handle. not a soul would bust in on the two of you. 

you were ripping off your heels and throwing them across the floor before you were latched onto him again. but it didn’t last long until you wanted more. you weren’t going to fuck him in this kitchen, either. you were going to do it right, despite your hazy mind and actions. 

lando chased after you like a mad man. you squealed running through the hotel room on your tip toes until you burst open the door to his place. the bed sheets were ruffled, clothes on the floor, and it smelled like him. you bit back a moan at the sight, lando’s chest meet your back.

his lips were back on your neck, your shoulders. he tore through the fabric of your dress, undoing the zipper with methodical fingers. the gown fell to the floor, leaving your chest bare and your panties thin and otherworldly. 

you were ethereal. 

there wasn’t an ounce of shame inside of you when you spun around to face him. his hands were running up and down your bare skin, feeling how soft you were. a cuss fell verbosely from his lips, like honey. 

you backed away from him with an enticing look, swaying your hips before you fell backward on his bed, hands threading over your head. a palm came down to trace down your sternum, your lower belly, the hem of your dampened panties. 

lando watched you through his darkened eyes, almost black with desire. black holes. they sucked up the light around them, absorbing it without second thought. you wanted nothing more than to be absorbed by him. wholly. 

he stalked towards you like a hunter, back straight with his lip caught between his teeth. he wanted to ravage you right here– tear the underwear from your hips, fuck you into another dimension, but he would resist. all he wanted was to savor this moment, this vision, of you laying out before him, bare and vulnerable. all for him. you trusted him with your intimacy, your touches. he’d do nothing more to keep you like this. 

the british driver stood over you, your legs coming to squeeze together until his knee shoved its way through. your thighs dangled over the edge of the bed, burning with the scorching heat of your core. 

one of his fingers came down to run over your chest, your nipples, your abdomen. you squirmed at his teasing touch, feeling everything and absolutely nothing at once. you mewled deep within your throat, begging for more. 

he stopped at the band of your underwear, latching the same finger beneath it and drawing his hand back. the fabric peeled away with ease, your cunt glistening at his will. he noticed, of course, nostrils flaring with a tense angst of lust. no woman had looked as beautifully sinful as you have. you were a blessing and a curse– the most angelic devil he’s ever met. 

“beautiful,” he cooed, trailing two fingers over the crease of your thighs, over the lips of your pussy. you whined again, shifting your hips to get him to touch you where you needed him. badly. he tsked, at your impatience. 

it took him all of a second to launch atop of you, his turn to cage you in with his toned arms. you watched as his veins pulsed, blood running viciously hot through his body. it had you glancing down at the outline of his cock through his pants, the indent firm and mesmerizing. 

you salivated, a string of drool leaking from your mouth. he wiped it away with his thumb and a chuckle, looking at you from his elevated position above you. “soon, sweet girl.”

that was enough for you right now. his lips attached to your chest once more, spots already swollen and bruising with his previous attack. he moved to your breasts, cupping them in his palms, kneading the flesh. it felt heavenly to be beneath him like this– you never thought you could be so vulnerable with a man like this before. 

the british driver’s mouth moved to your opposing nipple, latching onto it with his tongue swirling over the sensitive bud. you whined, mouth opening for a loud gasp at the curdling sensation. you felt that feeling in your lower belly, a white hot coil that was desperate to snap. 

you were so soft beneath his touch. he could mold you, bruise you for his own gawking at a later date. and you wanted him to. you were his and he was yours. nothing could change that now. 

he moved to the other breast, not daring to neglect any part of you. it was euphoric how delectable this was. you’ve never been touched so intimately. no one has cared this much about your pleasure. but to lando, it was everything. 

his gospel was on your pleasures. 

“lan, lan please,” you whimpered, squirming beneath him when he wasn’t between your thighs yet. “need you so bad.” 

“i know baby,” he said into the skin of your belly. you felt his smirk. he kept trailing down and down. “so pretty,” he sighed, coming face to face with your folds, swollen and beating for his touch. 

 you clenched around nothing, and the desperation has never been so poignant. 

and then his tongue was on you, spreading you wide. you gasped, so responsive to his touch, and grappled onto the curly strands of his hair. he was deliberate with his touches, fingers digging into the plush skin of your thighs. his tongue drilled into you, curling upward that had you biting back your moans. despite your efforts, it was a failure. you were slack jawed and squirming beneath him. his grip tightened around your thighs in response, surely bruising the skin. 

he tongued every corner of your pussy, swiping over your clit once that had you jolting upward. he memorized the spot, stimulating you to the point where the coil began to itch to snap. 

there was no hope for you when he was getting impatient and added a finger to rub circles on your clit, his tongue continuing to thrust in and out of you. pleasure would build and build, rising to an ultimate bliss when he found that sparkler inside of you. 

at the angle he caressed with his tongue, you bucked your hips into him further. you felt him chuckle into you, his throat vibrating with such a cocky sound. he found a spot that made you fucking tick and you were entirely at his disposal. 

he abused the motion of his fingers, the assault of his tongue. you felt entirely undone by him, progressively getting tighter and tighter at his motions. “come on, baby…” he spoke into you. you couldn’t help the uncontrollable arch of your back. “you’ll be a good girl and come for me, won’t you?”

yes, yes! your mind shouted, fingers hanging onto his hair for dear life. you moaned, soaking further with his words of encouragement, eyes rolling back into your head. ‘course you needed him to talk you through it. how silly of lando with such an oversight. “so good, lan…”

“i’ve got you,” he uttered. “fuck baby, so pretty f’me. come on now,” and you needed nothing more than his sweet praise brushing past your ears to have the coil inside of you snap. 

you saw stars as you came on his tongue, sweet nectar filling his mouth with a gulp. he kissed every part of you, cleaning you with his tongue. you watched, weary eyed, amazed by how hot the action was. your pussy clenched. he felt it. glancing up at you from his position on his knees. 

“taste so good, sweet girl.” he cleaned up the excess from your plump folds with two fingers, bringing them towards your mouth. 

you opened your mouth on cue, his eyes widening with awe. you were fucking perfect. lips latching onto his plush fingers, you sucked them clean amply. you’ve never done such an act before, but it felt…natural. his dick was painfully hard in his pants, almost cumming at the sight of your lust filled eyes.

“my perfect girl…” 

you whined, sitting up on your elbows and clenching your hand to etch him closer. he listened on command, climbing to you. it was his shirt, pants, socks, shoes, everything that was on him that bothered you. 

fingers coming to yank at the hem of his shirt, he swiftly understood your nonverbal wishes. he tore his shirt over his head, throwing it to the corner of the room, and you fiddled with the belt of his jeans. your fingers worked fast and anxiously, throwing the damn belt across the room with a slap. he gripped your chin with a laugh as he loomed above you. 

“want you,” you demanded of him in your sweet, cracked voice. he wouldn’t make you beg this time, pulling his garments down with a swift motion. his cock sprung free and up towards the skin of his lower stomach. you flushed. precum was seeping from his tip, dripping onto your thighs. fuck, you whimpered under your breath. 

he didn’t settle for a grace period to settle from your orgasm. he wasn’t nearly finished with you. his hand came to cup the side of your face, your lips finding the skin of his palm. wet kisses covered the surface. he groaned. “you got me baby. relax for me, yeah?” 

you nodded eagerly, unable to speak as you wiggled your hips from side to side. he bent over and continued to kiss gingerly down your neck, his tip teasing your swollen cunt. you gasped into him, pulling him close to you. he grumbled, finding this angle inadequate. soon enough your legs were over his shoulders with one swift movement. 

lando dipped down for a kiss, his lips hot and feral against your own. soon enough, you felt him clamor inside of you. the stretch was invigorating, your entire body springing to life with his beating cock. “oh my god,” your head flew back into the sheets sinking inward as he felt too heavenly to be real.

“that’s it baby,” your cunt tightened around him with those sweet words. as he progressed further, you felt yourself fall further and further into pure bliss. you’d find no such place elsewhere, only in the comfort of his arms. you knew that to be certain. “taking me so well…”

you sucked in a breath, letting out a hoarse moan when he bottomed out inside of you, walls clenching entirely too tight and he thought he’d cum right then and there. but he withheld the best he could, promising to never cum before you did. he needed to see your face when you’d finish on his cock. 

“fuck…move, move lan, need you.” you whined, adjusting extremely well to his size. he didn’t even need to prod you to beg for him, you were already a willing candidate. he always knew you would. your sweet eyes, droopy and dolled up for him at the races. he’d imagined these scene over and over in his head, and never once did it disappoint when he’d fist his cock. now you were here, and your cunt was even more heavenly than he imagined. 

“anything, baby.” his pace was even and controlled, but you could see that he was tense. through your bedroom eyes, you could feel the tension through his cock. you appreciate the sentiment of taking it slow, but you knew how he was. 

he liked to be fast. 

“more,” you moaned, his head shooting up to look at you with surprise. you cupped his cheeks, flushed face begging him. “fuck me, lan. need you so fucking bad, please, please–”

he would burn the fucking world for you. you didn’t know it at that moment, but he had never been so in love with you than he has been before. he adhered to your wishes, losing the tension in his shoulders as he began a rough pace against your cunt. 

it was his only goal to make sure you felt him in every part of your body. he stretched every corner of your walls, squeezing him at every increasing thrust. he explored you fully and promised to know every inch of you. 

“taking me so well,” he grunted out, hips flexing in and out of you with an egregious pace. it was to your ultimate liking to get fucked so well by him. 

“lan…” you drawed out in a moan, lost in the stars of his throttling pace. “you’re so good. so fucking–” your own pleasure cut you off, squealing when he shifted only slightly and had your core clenching him tight. 

he let out a greedy snicker, knowing he found a spot that made you unbelievably tick. it was his to find, and his to use. you would know no better pleasure than what he awarded you. 

“oh fuck–!” you yelped as your release continued to build, the tip of the iceberg in reach. lando felt it, too, with his own stomach tightening and desperate to cum inside of you. you were a trigger for all his desires, and it would be sent off with a singular please that could leave your lips. the power you held over him and didn’t even know it…

“always gonna make you feel good, baby.” he promised you, dipping his abdomen over yours for a deeper, tighter angle. you whimpered, unable to speak. he would do it for you as he kissed over your cheeks, your jawline. 

his hand came to the column of your throat. your eyes flared with an undeniable attention and intrigue. you clenched around him, and he hadn’t even applied pressure. “always.” and you fucking believed him when his fingers swiped at the sides, applying the slightest pressure of his fingers to your airway. you fell lax against the sheets, trusting him with every part of your body. no one else would feel this way for him. no one except you. 

your eyes swelled with hot tears, breaking when he was firmer with his grasp, even with his hard cock beaming in and out of you. 

he lavished at the sight. he never knew he was so hungry up until now, starving for your affection, your pleasures. how perfect you were could never be summarized in words alone. 

“i love you,” you sputtered out, breathless and flushed hot. lando’s pace didn’t falter, but his grip around your neck loosened. 

“say it again,” he demanded, face pushing up into the crevice of your neck.

“love you so much, lando,” it was a promise you made to him. to yourself. he swore against your neck, his breath hot and humid against your skin. 

“come for me. come on, my love.” his words were only encouraging you towards and ultimate release, your tears hot against your cheeks. “i’ve got you, i’ve got you baby. so good for me, aren’t you?”

“yes, yes!” you whimpered, coil of lust for the british driver snapping a second time, harder, bringing an entire galaxy into your vision. you traveled through time and with lando, you found yourself grounded together in every universe. this was home. 

your cunt tightened, causing his pace to get sloppy, his own release parallel to yours. you milked him dry, panting and chests heaving together. 

he fell on top of you, his full weight comforting against your wet skin. he didn’t pull out yet, too exhausted to find the effort. 

“did you mean it?” i love you.

“yes.”

lando became shy as he found himself brushing your nose with his. “i love you, too. have for a long time.” 

a long time

“i will love you in every life time,” you said, earning you the brightest smile that the driver could muster. a lifetime. 

“a lifetime…” he repeated, in a daze. “love you so much…” he said your name into your cheek, giving you a plump kiss. “infinite lifetimes would never be enough.” 

you peppered his face with kisses. this was your gravity. the force that kept you grounded throughout time. if you ever got lost in the cosmic reaches, you would be able to find him. find home. find the beacon of light that he provided. 

you were safe here, and so was he. and does gravity know no bounds between objects. you would be attached to one another for the rest of your living days, and even further throughout the cosmos. and that was enough for you, for now. 

────────────

weeps;;

i am also open for requests <3

#lando norris #lando norris x reader #lando norris fic #lando norris smut #lando norris x you #lando norris fluff #dad!lando norris #f1 fic #f1 smut #formula 1 fic #formula 1 smut #f1 fics #lando norris imagine #lando norris blurb #f1 driver x you #f1 driver x reader #lando norris angst #f1 angst #formula 1 fluff #formula 1 angst #friends to lovers #mclaren #mclaren f1 #f1 oneshot #lando norris oneshot

[mylifestylearedilfs]

⇢ ˗ˏˋ joost klein x tinder date!reader ࿐ྂ

ੈ✩‧₊˚ OCEAN EYES : mention of sex (but no smut) fluff ; use of alcohol ; imagine ; all is fictional ; english is not my first language

, , ,

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐ CREATING AN ACCOUNT on tinder wasn’t on your to do list, but after another failed attempt on meet your future ‘husband’ in real life, you decided to seek luck at this app. after choosing your best pictures, you set your profile with hope that you wouldn’t have to text with all of those weirdos that probably were on this site, asking themselves why i don’t have girlfriend?

you honestly couldn’t understand people (mostly the whole alfa men) on this kind of platforms, where they acted like they’re better than everyone else, but in reality they wouldn’t even say ‘hi’ to you. also what’s the point of having a dating app, if you can’t even properly ask the other person to date. you personally hated texting, it was the worst way to communicate, because you weren’t able to show your emotions clearly and it was easier to misunderstand the intentions.

you tried to ignore all suspicious looking people, but you lose hope, when even people your type were weird or impolite towards you. you were close to just delete app and forget about everything that happened. but then you received some kind of ‘super like’ from very good looking blonde man, the first thing that caught your attention was his bright blue eyes. how ironic, you thought. blonde hair and blue eyes, if he were a girl, he definitely would be miss universe. but god knew that he would be too powerful if he was a woman.

before you even checked his profile, you saw that he already messaged you. he already had big plus, because it was usually you who needed to start a conversation.

‘you & me, beer in an hour?’ okay, he definitely was really straightforward but you couldn’t tell that you didn’t liked it.

‘okay’

it was an irresponsible decision, but you couldn’t care less right now. you were truly tried of the endless conversations about nothing, you needed some adrenaline in your life. and even if it turn out that he’s a murderer, you will have an interesting story to tell your future kids — of course if you will survive in that scenario.

, , ,

it was almost twenty minutes after the set time, but you still waited like a fool, because you were curious if you were just scammed at this point. when your second cigarette started to slowly gutter out, you checked your phone to see if he tried to inform you about his lateness, but as you thought — nothing. you were honestly irritated that you couldn’t met a proper guy, not even for a relationship but just good sex, apparently you just missed to have someone close, in physical and mental way.

fuck it. you said to yourself and deleted this stupid dating app, right after you did that, you heard someone’s calling your name. before you turned around, you throw out a cigarette.

“i get it that i’m late, but you don’t have to ignore me” you saw the blonde guy in front of you, with two bottles of wine in his hands and two beer cans in his jeans pockets.

“so your real miss universe, nice to meet you” you said with a bit of irony in your voice, and he just laughed, giving you bootle of alcohol.

“or maybe i’m just in your imagination, guess we will never know” he said with smile, and you realised that he loved to laugh a lot, but honestly that was exactly what you needed now. some positive energy. “but now let’s go, shall we?”

, , ,

at first it was supposed to be quick meeting to get each other better and then probably forget about the existence of each other. but to your surprise it turned out that you were sitting in some sketchy looking place with joost for almost four hours already, and the fun only began.

you couldn’t believe that your perfect type of person was right in front of you and he was interested in you, which was the most unbelievable part. he was the first person that could make you laugh only by saying something random, or maybe it was because you were under the influence of weed, that you just smoked. either way his ability to turn every little thing into a joke was hilarious and you simply loved it.

suddenly you both became silent, but it wasn’t uncomfortable for you, which was also something new. all you could hear was the sound of wind and some other birds but you decided to interrupt the silence.

“you want to come to my place?” you said without thinking twice, well. . . let’s be honest your brain wasn’t working at all at the moment.

“to do what?” he looked at you with his typical smirk, sipping his beer.

“obviously to play monopoly” you said sarcastically, but underneath you had a little smile. “i want you to fuck me” you added and he seemed to be taken aback with your directness, as he watched you getting up.

“so you’re coming or i will need to please myself on my own?” you said, walking slowly in the direction of your house.

“you don’t need to tell me twice” he quickly said and you just chuckled as you felt his hands on your waist.

that was a great match, for sure.

, , ,

⇢ ˗ˏˋ thank you for attention! hope you liked it!

#joost klein x you #joost klein imagine #joost klein x reader #i love joost #stand with joost #joost x reader #eurovision imagines #imagine #x reader

[byunpum]

Back to you | Part 1

Pair: Jake(human and avatar) x Neytiri x Human reader (trio couple)

Warning: None, i think kinda sad. More in future, maybe soft-smut in the future.

Note: I'm still alive after disappearing for 1 month. Ahh omg, it's been so long, I'm so sorry. A lot of things have happened, more good than bad. But we're back…and as I had posted. Here I bring you this story, based on my mini-series 'mama's boy'. Here I share with you how our characters are paired up. I hope you like it, and let me know what you think and if I should continue with the mini-series. Love ya <3

+Read 'Mama's boy' HERE+

AVATAR MASTERLIST

You were feeling uncomfortable in the metal chair, which was placed next to the bonding machine, which allowed humans to use their avatars. Since the routine expedition, Jake had not returned. Everyone knew he was alive, but where was he? No one knew. Grace had asked you as a favor to monitor him until he returned. You weren't complaining, but you had avoided having any contact with Jake. He reminded you of things…Not even 20 minutes had passed, when the machine made a noise indicating that it would open. You get up from the chair as quickly as you can, to assist Jake. You help him open the lid, finding a confused, sweaty Jake with a stupid grin that made your heart pound. “You won't believe where I am?” says Jake, as you let out a big sigh and shift your gaze to Grace.

“Oh my god…you're back!!!” shouts grace from her desk. Coming towards you, she was already releasing a machine to take jake's blood pressure. “Grace…I'm in” says Jake, the man was lying on his shoulders. He was still a little weak, you force him to drink water from a bottle. Taking his chin to make him open his mouth. While grace looks at him with confusion. “What?” grace continues to work on adjusting the machine on his arm. Jake had been so many hours without using his body, he could pass out at any moment. “Yes…they accepted me. I'm inside their home” jake, looks at you. “You're in the tree home?” you ask. You watch as he nods his face quickly. Grace takes jake's face in her hands, and gives him a warm smile. “I can't believe it…are you serious?!!!” grace was shocked. They had tried to get in, but it was impossible. “I'm with a girl…ahhh netyy ahhh” jake tries to remember and pronounce the name correctly of the girl who is supposed to help him adjust. “Neytiri?” you speak softly, but loud enough for jake to hear you. “Yes her” jake speaks up.

Grace looks at you quickly and she can see the sadness in your gaze. You change your face and mood, moving away from Jake, helping him to put his weight down. Turning away from them, you bump into norm who had approached you moments before. “Are you okay?” norm asks, touching your shoulder, but you push him away. Walking as fast as you could away from them, you wanted to get out of there. You felt short of breath and were wiping away tears hiding your emotion. She was fine. It had been so long since you had heard from her. On the other side a group of friends are confused, “What's wrong with her, did I say something wrong?” asks Jake, looking at Grace. The woman was still looking towards the exit, sighing deeply. “It's a long story…come on out of there you need to rest and tell me everything” says grace, helping Jake into his wheelchair.

Lunchtime came quickly, and the entire team was gathered in the dining room eating dinner. The group of scientists were very excited and focused on every word that came out of Jake's mouth. It had been so long since they had been able to have a connection with the Omaticaya clan. Even grace was giving him their undivided attention. Meanwhile you and norm were standing a little away from the group, eating the disgusting food. You couldn't help but laugh at the look on norm's face, you could tell he was very upset. You kicked his foot a little, “hey get that face away” you scolded him, but you saw how he snapped with his teeth. “I can't stand this… it's a very unfair” norm says. “Unfair?” you ask, as you put a mouthful of food in your mouth. “Yes, Tom has been studying for 3 years and I've been studying for over 6 years…and where am I? sitting here, doing nothing. In fact, if anyone in the whole RDA deserved to be with the omaticaya clan, it's you. You've been in pandora all your life…you're part of the clan” speaks norm annoyed, seeing how you interrupt him with your index finger. “Ah ah was…past!!!” you speak, lowering your gaze for a moment. Some memories come to your head, yes, it was very true what norm said, you were once part of the omaticaya clan…but it's been so long. Maybe… they have forgotten about you. “Norm…I understand your discomfort, but there's nothing we can do, the pretty boy was lucky to be accepted” you joke, seeing Norm's disgusted face. “Jake pretty boy?!!!! You have to be crazy” you laugh loudly, looking at the group of scientists who were still harassing jake. “Well…you were tom's girlfriend, that says a lot about you” Norm says, now he was the one laughing at you. “We weren't boyfriend and girlfriend…we just spent a few nights together” you speak up, laughing with your friend.

While you and Norm were still laughing, for a moment you see Jake look at you and give you a smile. You return it, seeing how jake makes a help signal with his hands. You laugh even harder, but you feel Norm pinch you “don't be fooled by the enemy” says Norm “Norm let me go!!!” you roll your eyes back. Norm could sometimes be very very annoying. But you were used to it, he had always been like that.

You remember when norm and tom came to pandora. Just for their studies, and you were the first to meet them. From then on… you had grown very fond of them. When the news that tom had been killed reached your ears, you were heartbroken, again…but you got over it little by little. But with the new member of the group, it wasn't very easy. Since Jake had arrived, he hadn't taken his interest in you, and to make things worse for you. Grace had delegated all responsibility for Jake's avatar to you, so if anything happened to him it was your fault. And the last thing you wanted was for a $20 million dollar avatar to happen to him, or else the RDA was going to kill you.

After the meal, and when everyone was about to go to their respective rooms. Norm had gone ahead walking as fast as he could through the cold corridors of the RDA. You were walking more calmly, plus you wanted to meet Jake. You felt you owed him an apology for leaving him alone. By pure chance you find him, you see that he was talking something with Quaritch. You look at him with concern, if you knew one thing, it was that quaritch never had good intentions, if he wasn't given anything in return. When you see both men stop talking, you decide to approach jake. “Hello” you speak softly, catching the man's attention. Jake turns around, with a small smile. Lifting his gaze. “I'm all ears” jake says. You had barely spoken to jake since he arrived, so you were a little nervous. “One question…ahh where did you leave my avatar?” you ask. “Your avatar? It's in a safe place” jake says. “Yeah, but what safe place?” you wanted him to be more literal, because his concept of safety might be very different from yours. “I'm sleeping in some kind of giant leaf…ahh I don't remember” jake speaks up, shuffling his hair.there was a short silence between the two of you, but you decide to speak. “You're in the big tree?” you speak. Jake can see your eyes light up for a moment. “Yes…that. There I am” jake can see you kneel down in front of him, and move much closer. Placing your hands on his knees. As if whatever you were going to ask him, you didn't want anyone else to hear. “And how did you see everything? Is everyone okay?” you ask. “Yeah…normal, there's only one who seems to be a bother and he's warrior…I don't remember his name” jake says and can see how you smile softly. “That's tsu'tey” you speak. “That same one, do you know him?” jake gets closer to your face, and you quickly push him away. “Ahh thank you for answering me…see you tomorrow” you get up quickly, and leave quickly. Before you continue walking to your room, you stop “By the way…sorry for leaving you alone when you wake up, next time I'll take better care of you” you apologize, and turn to continue on your way.

Jake stood there confused, he thought you looked kind of strange. But cute…very cute. He could understand his brother now. Laughing to himself, he started on his way to his room. Although he must admit that he found it even stranger, that you knew the name of that navi. It was assumed that only people who have an avatar have had contact with the Omaticayas, and he understands that not all of them have. How did you know that?

The next day came quickly, and Jake had almost no time to wake up…because he had to get up early. Wiping his eyes, he was already sitting on the edge of the connection machine. “Good morning” you hummed, approaching him. You had a cup of coffee in your hands, offering it to him with some vitamins. “Good morning gorgeous” jake chuckles, as he can as norm makes a dirty face. “Here…you'll need this” you hand him the stuff. “And this?” jake asks. “It's some vitamins that will help your body not collapse from not eating all day and a coffee” you speak, as you practically force jake to take it all. Grace approaches you, accompanied by Norm. “Well, here's the information,” says Grace, showing Jake a screen. On it was all of neytiri's information. You come to Jake's side, looking at the screen with a warm smile. “Please don't disrespect her….y do not be a jerk” norm speaks, giving jake a dirty look. “You're just upset because I'm the one going on a date with the leader's daughter” jake says in a mocking voice. Grace rolls her eyes and tells you to take care of hooking Jake up. As jake lies down, you approach him. “ Advice…don't try to flirt with neytiri” you speak up. Watching as jake raises an eyebrow, and laughs a little. “There you go…and how do you know that?” he speaks. You now give him a big smile, but one of sarcasm. “I know why I say that” you speak, as you turn away from jake. “You should listen to her,” Grace shouts from the distance. “Good luck…soldier” you speak, being the last face jake saw to wake up in his avatar body.

And yes, jake should take your advice, you knew neytiri more than anyone. And yes you were hating the fact that he could be with her. It had been so many years since you last saw her, you didn't even get to say goodbye…nothing. The last time you saw Neytiri was when that tragedy happened at school. You sigh a little, as you begin to prepare the week's paperwork. But your thoughts are interrupted when you feel grace sit down next to you. “I have good news… a new project is coming out tomorrow,” says Grace. You look at her curiously. “Project?” you ask. Grace's face ascends. “Yes…we need to be closer to the clan, a place we are safe, but we can still get on with the project 'jakesully” says grace, watching you laugh. “I was able to convince the RDA idiots to have a bunker, where we can have a team, a small lab. i'm counting on you, right?” grace looks at you with a raised eyebrow, waiting for your answer. “Can I refuse?” you speak, feeling Grace hug you and press a kiss to your hair. “It'll be for the best… we'll have a great time, no personal space” grace jokes, as you groan loudly.

And as if by magic, within a week you were in the bunker in the middle of the jungle. Norm, grace, judy, jake and you. Although judy came and went from time to time to get everything you needed. Even though she used to get away so often, she was part of the team. You adjusted too quickly, it seemed to be comfortable. And the comfort you felt around Jake was increasing too, and very quickly. This seemed to be nice for grace, she liked to see you happy and excited about something or someone…it had been a long time since she had seen you like this. Watching from afar, as you wiped jake's face with a wet rag. “I'm not a baby” says Jake, as you wipe his eyes. While you hold your face with both hands. “Yeah but you're barely taking care of yourself…I know your avatar body is amazing, but you're here” you touch his chest and feel his heart. “Can you feel it moving? It's that fast for you “ jake jokes, watching you laugh and turn away from him. “That was the worst thing you've said so far” norm complains from behind you, as he sips his coffee.

You liked it when jake would go back to his body in the afternoon, and do his video documentaries. And you could listen to everything he had learned, plus he would also tell you everything he had done with neytiri. “It's just that it's hard to use the bow…it's” Jake would explain with his hands, you could see the frustration in his eyes and gestures. Neytiri could be very rude at times, but that was the way it was and he had to learn. “The trick is to put pressure on the back arm” you move, and show him the pose. “And boom…done” you joke. Jake shakes his head to the side, watching as you continue to explain how he should do things. Just like neytiri was doing, they were explaining almost identically. Jake leans forward and brushes a strand of hair away from your face. Tucking it behind your ear. “Thank you” you speak timidly, now pulling away. “Thank you for helping me” jake says.

Since you had gotten closer to him, he had improved so much with the lessons with neytiri. If she told him something, he would ask you as soon as he returned to his human body. And you answered him without hesitation, sometimes he didn't understand how you knew so much about the clan. Only grace and a few avatars were supposed to have had contact with the clan, norm could know some things. But you were an expert. And your advice is really paying off. Now jake was in his avatar body, he was holding the bow again, and he remembered what you had said to him. “Neytiri was asking you to put strength in your arms, so you will be more accurate in your shooting” jake remembered your words, he adjusted his stance. Neytiri was approaching him, but stopped short. When she noticed Jake's stance, she stood watching him. Seeing how the shot was perfect. “Well done” says neytiri, watching as jake smiles at her. She was wondering how he had improved overnight. But if she could tell, it was the technique jake was using…it was very similar to yours. Neytiri tries to distract herself and keeps walking towards the prey.

For a moment during the day, the two of them had sat down in a nice quiet meadow to eat something to eat…neytiri was minding her own business eating her food. But she could feel jake's gaze, he might change his gaze once or twice. But he would look back at her. “ What are you looking at so much?” speaks neytiri without taking her eyes off her fruit. Jake remains thoughtful for a moment. “That necklace around your neck” jake points to the woven necklace neytiri had around her neck, she touches it while looking at it warmly. “What is it?” jake asks, but he thinks he knows the answer. The reason he's asking is because the night before, when he came over to fix your hair. He could see you had that same necklace, he wanted to believe it was something grace gave you. But today he noticed the same one on Neytiri and was surprised. They were identical. “This…” neytiri holds her necklace tightly. “This is a memory of her” neytiri says, she stops eating for a moment. She could look thoughtful, like she was remembering someone. “Her?” asks jake. Neytiri looks at him slowly, you could see her little teary eyes. But she gets up suddenly, “Come on…we have a lot of things to do” says neytiri. Jake stands up behind her, and catches her hand to stop her for a second. “Neytiri…are you okay?” the boy asks. Neytiri squeezes jake's hand for a moment, looking down and taking a deep breath. “Yes,” she says. Starting to walk to a new route, but Jake could tell how she didn't let go of his grip and continued to hold his hand tightly. Jake didn't refuse at any point, neytiri is not very affectionate to say the least, and the fact that she was still holding his hand. It meant that she needs him right now.

That same afternoon, when jake and neytiri came home from training, they had lunch with the whole clan. And lay down to rest in their respective places, neytiri waited a few minutes to carefully lift her head and see if jake had finally fallen asleep. She had her home with her parents, being still single, neytiri could live with her parents. But right now, she had the task of training and taking care of Jake. So she had to be wherever he was. Neytiri notices how Jake is asleep. Getting up from her hammock, to walk carefully in the branches. Leaving the resting area, running carefully to her ikran. “sense…come on” says neytiri, climbing into her ikran quickly. flying away from the familiar tree, she hopes no one was following her, because she was heading to a place she only knew about.

Not far away, there was a very tall tree. Too tall to be anything but scary for anyone to come and interrupt. Neytiri leads Seze to a giant branch, which had a beautiful view of the jungle of Pandora. Neytiri climbs down from the ikran, stroking the creature's head, stretching a little. To approach the tree trunk, picking up a small bag. Now to sit on the edge of the branch. She sighs a little, looking at the scenery. Opening the bag, and taking out of it a piece of paper. Very carefully she unfolds it and laughs to see what was drawn on it.

A cute doodle drawing…on it were two girls. Neytiri laughs to herself, as she touches the paper wistfully. “I hope you never forget me…my Y/N” Neytiri speaks softly. Hugging the paper carefully, this was the only thing I had of you.

What do you think? should I continue? btw, If you want to be tagged, let me know.<3

#avatar the way of water #avatar x y/n #avatar x reader #avatar x you #avatar 2022 #female y/n #human reader #human y/n #neteyam imagine #neteyam #lo'ak imagine #lo'ak sully #lo'ak x reader #kiri sully #neytiri #neytiri x human reader #neytiri x y/n #neytiri x reader #neytiri x jake #neytiri x you #jake x reader #jake x neytiri #jake x y/n #jake sully x you #jake sully x neytiri #jake sully x reader #jake sully x y/n #jake x neytiri x reader #jake x neytiri x human reader #sully family

[seirei-bh]

My opinion and theories about Jason's route ep 4

This post focuses only on Jason's part of the episode, I'll be playing Amanda and Thomas' routes in a few days, so I'll save my thoughts about their images, moments and dialogue in detail for later. And I'll do also other post about general curiosities facts of the ep, but I prefer to wait a few days for that.

BIG SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT, you're warned!

Well, first of all: if you are Devon, Amanda, Thomas or Roy, you are in luck, this is your chapter! But if you're the Jason route, you might be disappointed (it wasn't like that in my case, but I've seen a lot of people disappointed for understandable reasons, I'll leave my opinion below)

A summarize about Jason's moment:

-We met him in the cafeteria by coincidence, but he didn't see us yet.

-Thomas says he secretly follows Jason on his Instagram account.

-Elenda hints that maybe Jason has a crush on Ysaline. While Brune is worried because she thinks maybe Jason is trying to "hunt" Ysaline.

-Then Thomas and Devon start speculating about Jason's relationships. They insinuate that he must be a womanizer and someone who see people as prizes to be won because he is with different several women in photos and it doesn't seem like his relationships last long.

-HOWEVER, Jason suddenly appears because he has heard the conversation. He seems to feel offended, he hints that he feels disappointed by the others' attitude. Jason also says that regarding his private life and romantic relationships "there are reasons why I prefer not to commit long term" but that it's none of their business. And then he leaves.

Okay. Let's theorize here!

Apparently, and in the opinion of Thomas, Devon, and most of our peers, Jason is a womanizer. But the fact that he says very seriously that there is another reason behind why he only has short relationships and not long ones, I have a few theories about it, and yes, I think it will be a bigger issue than it may seem.

-A while ago I did a headcanons post about Jason in which among his headcanons, I got right the fact that he has only had brief relationships so far, and there are some possibilities that I mentioned there that could be that reason behind all this :

1- He simply doesn't have time for long relationships. This man is married to his job, and perhaps most of the partners he had didn't understand that, and he doesn't give his 100% in relationships either because he thinks they're not worth it and are a waste of time.

2- Since he is a rich, handsome and powerful man, he either believes that he has a perfect image to maintain and he fears that any woman could discover some weakness to use against him, so he prefers to end the relationship before it becomes serious. If this is the reason, he may have had a serious relationship in the past that caused him some emotional damage, which made him more cautious later (which could be something he had in common with Ysaline). And maybe even his family pressures him to keep that perfect image too.

3- And this is my favorite theory, as I speculated in his headcanons post: his poliosis was a consequence of a Waardenburg syndrome. A syndrome that also can cause him to suffer from partial deafness and even vision problems. And for this reason, perhaps he doesn't want or thinks that he should never have children, so he prefers not to have long relationships, so that no woman can find out this fact and become disappointed with the issue of not being able to have children with him in the future, other than that it would be for him to admit a weakness that could cause him to be fired from his job (I have a family member who lost his job because he turned partially blind from a hereditary disease, so yeah these kind of things can happen). And for a man like Jason, who values ​​his job so much, losing him for something like that could be a big blow for him. Also, on a plot level it would be an interesting plot twist for his character, in my opinion.

Now let's get to another tricky part of the episode.

-After Jason leaves, Devon explains to us that the reason for his enmity with him was that, a while ago, they both entered a contest, and apparently, Jason copied the work that Devon did, that's why Roy calls him in the ep 2 liar and thief.

-However, there is something in this whole story that doesn't add up: Jason presented his project days after Devon, and that caused Jason was fired and lost the city council's own confidence. And when Devon asked him for an explanation for the plagiarism, Jason blamed Devon. So… what really happened??

-We lack information here. I think we won't know the full truth until Jason tells us his pov in all of this.

-If Jason had plagiarized and stolen from him on purpose, then he should have submit his project before Devon. It would have been the logical step to avoid being harmed. There's also the possibility that Jason just had a BIG coincidence of ideas similars to Devon's, but Jason wouldn't be so offended or attack Devon so much if it was just his own fault…

-I have a theory that there is a third person involved in this story.

-Perhaps that third person was one of Jason's colleagues, or one of his private investors, or perhaps someone from the city council or a person from another company who was a fake friend of Jason's and wanted to secretly harm him. I think that person found out about what Devon was going to do, and that person gave that idea to Jason without telling him that it was Devon's idea, like "hey, I've this idea, let's share it for this project" and then when it was shows it belonged to Devon, that third person told Jason that it was Devon the one who had stolen the idea from them. That person twisted the story.

-Now, the biggest disappointment of the ep if you're Jason's route: you only talk to him for a minute.

-Yeah, it was disappointing to spend so little time with him after waiting a whole month. Although I still enjoyed his moment because of the theories it made me think about it and I still think his route worths it. Besides, If I had enough patience in the past to deal with Leiftan's very very VERY brief moments in the first eps of Eldarya, then I can also deal with Jason's route being frustrating that way XD That's what you got when you're playing the secret route: your're going to suffer always in th firsts eps lmao.

-There is only a brief dialogue with all your companions in front and then you check out his Instagram. I really hope his part in the 5th episode is longer ToT

-His image it's the promotional image that we have already seen of him, but it doesn't surprise me, I already expected that image to be in an episode soon or later, he looks hot anyway, although I thought that the context would be more interesting, like seeing him in some important event instead of on Instagram.

-While Ysaline is looking his photos on Instagram, she thinks he seems to be "a big red flag" lol, although I'm not surprised after what her boss and colleages said about him, and because of this girl bad experience in the past (damn you, Ioan)

-This has made some players think that Jason is going to be a disappointing route, but personally I don't think so, not only because of the theories I have given, but because in UL I've been Castiel route and Nathaniel route, and both characters in the first eps they are very popular with women and you heard they had many short relationships of one night or a few days, and the beginning with both characters and Sucrette in UL is complicated… (Nath disappeared and got into trouble non-stop, We even find him flirting with a girl in chapter 3 in front of us, and Castiel, after spending the night with you, ignores you for an entire ep and says he doesn't want a relationship) but then in later chapters Castiel and Nath turned out to be WONDERFUL routes with sweet/beautiful moments and boys totally in love with Sucrette, faithful to her and who loved her deeply. So I think Jason might be a little similar to them in this case, with a very complicate start, but he'll be worth it in the end. And I'm into that shit, come on, the enemies to lovers drama!

-Oh and Ysaline gives the Jason's photo a "like" by mistake! XD So I guess Jason will mention this to us in a message or in the next ep. Hohohoh *evil smirk*

Conclusion: I can't say I totally loved it, but I'm not totally disappointed either. At least I'm glad we got a part of explanation about all Devon vs Jason's mess. I hope that in the next eps with his moments are longer (pls!)

#if you had the patience to read this whole long post THANK YOU #sorry for not be able to do it shorter ;__; #I've been overthinking about Jason for the last hours XDD #mcl new gen spoilers #mcl new gen #jason mendal #BIG SPOILERS #my candy love new gen #my candy love spoilers #mcl jason

[oh-koenig-my-koenig]

It's the parts of König that she didn't see

a/n: I worked on this special for quite some time and it's finally time to get a glimpse of what was going on in metalhead!könig's head during his time with reader... a little thank you to all the peeps who have kept up with the series and a little summary before we head into the last few chapters <3 (i added links to the chapters as well where the situations took place that i'm referring to)

(the usual CWs apply: age gap 25/41; MDNI, nsfw, lots of smut, fluff and a bit of angst)

the part before: saying goodbye

It's the parts of König that she didn't see. From the first moment on when they met.

How he was kneading his fingers before he just blurted out the comment, complimenting her on the shirt she was wearing, there in the bar.

The surprise when she approached him again, to talk. The thinly veiled flirty-ness on both sides that didn't quite register in his mind.

The little shock shooting through him when he realised that she was that much younger than him. His thoughts racing to find a way to gracefully navigate the situation while the sound of her cheery voice seeped into him.

Giving her his number when he offered to take her to a concert because she had nobody else to go with, thinking she would surely have forgotten about it by the next day.

The surprise on his face when she actually sent him a message in the morning.

The surprise growing when she didn't stop texting him, after she fixed the thing with going to the concert together. The pictures she sent him, just telling him about her day.

A little ding from his phone every now and then. The disappointment he tried to not feel when it was another email and not a message from her.

When he went to the drugstore before the concert, to pick up condoms, because the ones he still had at home weren't any good anymore.

It isn't even a date, we are just going to a concert. Because she didn't have anybody else to go with.

He felt himself going a little crazy over this. Cursing himself out because he was a 41 year old man anxious about buying condoms. Sure, not because of what other people might think while he purchased them. But overthinking what the younger woman he was going on a date with (that wasn't a date) might think.

Unsure if she would even consider him in that way. He didn't really trust his gut, the little voice in his head that reassured him that she was surely flirting with him over text. Better to be prepared, right?

The way his mind went blank when he saw her again, picking her up for the concert. She was really pretty in her outfit, but the thing that took his breath away was her disarming smile with which she beamed up at him.

She was tiny. In his mind she was tiny. A grown ass woman, sure, but compared to him everybody was small and dainty. And she seemed even more so.

And he saw that every time he looked at her. He always had to look down, but there she was. Cheery and yapping about her day. Looking up at him every so often, just having a normal conversation. And he couldn't fathom how that happened.

How his heart sank when he nudged her playfully while they were waiting in line at the bar. Which made her almost topple over. Fuck.

Her reassuring smile. "I don’t break that easily." The realisation on her face when she heard how that sounded. She was so easy to read, like an open book.

The one part of him wanted to find whoever tried to break her before. The other part wanted to break her himself. Just a little bit. See hot tears stream down her cheeks as she came on his dick. Make her scream for him. Feel her body writhing against his.

Verdammt. He shook his head, making those intrusive thoughts go away, but they kept pestering him.

When he put an arm around her shoulders, more reflex than anything really, shielding her off from the other people in the crowd bumping into her.

He almost pulled back, the nervous feeling of uncertainty licking up his spine, when he realised what he was doing. But then she leaned into him. Relief flooded him, his hand coming to lie on her hip.

Her shoulders didn't even reach his pecs, her head grazing over one of them, when she looked up at him. And for a moment, he felt like the unsure guy again that he once was. The huge grin on her face pushed that feeling away, the spark in her eyes, the excitement in her expression infecting him instantly.

"Thank you for taking me to the concert."

"You're so very welcome."

And he told himself right there and then that it didn't matter the slightest what came out of this. Seeing her get excited over being at the concert had already made it more than worth it tagging along. And he hadn’t been at one in so long, he had forgotten how fun it is.

He was willing his thoughts to stay platonic when he had her on his shoulders so she could see the band onstage better. Her skirt inevitably riding up, his fingers digging into her supple thighs to steady her and the warmth of her clothed pussy against the back of his neck. Trying to think about anything else but his head between her thighs and failing miserably.

When she very obviously tried to rile him up as he was taking her home afterwards, pulling out the "old man"-card again which clearly was a jab at his age. And he tried to ignore it. Trying to ignore the tension too that he felt, in case it was just him getting the wrong idea.

But then she dropped the b-word. Brat.

One banter led to another, and the banter led to her lips on his. Oh fuck, her soft moans. That he swallowed up with each kiss. She tasted so fucking good, the slight hint of beer that they both drank not able to drown out her taste.

Pulling her into him, her taking a seat in his lap. When she grinded down on him, no force in the world would have been able to conceal his erection, but he still tried to keep calm. To not lose his mind which was costing every ounce of restraint he could muster.

When she invited him up to his apartment, the innuendo clear, he had to double-check. “Are you sure you want this?”

That sweet "yes please" from her lips while she stared into his eyes and he couldn't find anything but want in them was finally enough to convince him that he wasn't dreaming.

Him not being able to stop grinning the whole day after dropping her off at work the next morning. Getting lost in the thoughts of her.

How her smaller body felt against his. Her soft thighs and tummy against his hard muscles. The way she shivered against his lips, coming down from her orgasm. Her taste in his mouth. He just wanted to go down on her again.

He also fit into her, perfectly. Sinking into her pussy, slowly, squeezing him tight. But he fit somehow.

His need to fuck her harder when he planned to do her slow and sweet. Her permission to not hold back, repeating how she won't break easily, dismantling his resolve.

Her moans when he pounded into her. His fucking name on her lips as he pressed her down into the mattress and she came again. He just wanted her to say it over and over as her eyes rolled back in pleasure.

Anticipating her messages all day long. Only a few of them. Trying not to feel the disappointment that was slowly sinking in.

He did what he always did when he couldn't drown out the voice in his head. Working out until his muscles hurt more than whatever was plaguing him. The dark screams from his headphones boomed in his ears while he upped the speed on the treadmill.

Still not able to forget how his name sounded on her lips. How her hands grabbed him. How her body...

He shook his head. No, he had to forget about that, or else he would go crazy.

Maybe it just had been a one-time thing for her?

Maybe she regrets it now? Maybe she thought about the age difference again and changed her mind? Which is fine, of course.

Maybe he did something wrong? Maybe he came on too strong still, despite making sure how she felt every step of the way. Asking if he could wake her up with his mouth. Something that made him curse himself out now.

He finally got the courage to text her about it. And she wanted to meet him, drive around in his car.

When he saw the look on her face as she waited for him on the curb in front of her apartment building. She wore her feelings on her sleeve and he could see the guilty conscience from a mile away. Which made him crack a joke, just to see her smile again.

“König Private Chauffeur inc. – at your service.” And it worked to make her laugh as she got in the passenger seat.

Her explanations how she has been held up with work made him feel better, at ease, although the little voice in his head still didn't shut up entirely. He even confessed that he hadn't been dating the last few years. Explaining his insecurities away, more to himself really, like it made any difference. This whole thing never had been about him, she had just been busy with work, all the doubts only had been in his head. Overthinking it all.

When she reassured him that she didn’t regret it and that it wasn’t anything he did. The blush on her face as she told him that she had indeed enjoyed it very much.

Oh, his ego almost couldn’t take it, and he knew he was getting cocky, unable to hide it, teasing her about it just a little bit. Needing to hear again how she couldn’t stop thinking about it either.

How she teased him in retaliation, her lips on his neck, her hand in his lap, so brazen. “Need you deep inside me.” His restraint snapping in an instant because the imagination alone drove him crazy.

The picture she sent him of her tits, earliest in the morning the next day. He probably never received a better Good Morning text.

Like he wasn't already awake, lying in bed, his morning wood straining against the boxer shorts, only made worse because first thing he thought about was how he fucked her on the backseat of his car. And he wasn’t planning to do anything about it, the thought alone making him feel dirty…

Yet he reciprocated her gesture and sent her a pic of his junk, safely tucked away in his boxers. Her naughty messages coaxing him to do something about his hard-on, he let her instructions guide him until he made a total mess. Sexting, something he never did before either.

He then took the chance to invite her to his place in the evening.

Which led to him taking the cover off the mirror on the ceiling in his bedroom. He often thought it was really unnecessary that he put that there. Not today though, with the prospect of fucking her on his bed.

He was standing on the mattress, polishing the reflective surface, making sure it's spotless. Grinning to himself thinking about her face when she sees it. Her face looking up at the mirrored image as he went down on her. Seeing what he got to see. Oh yeah, it had totally been worth it, just for that.

The way she looked standing there in his living room, in her casual comfy clothes. Stretching to get one of the books on the higher up shelves. Almost prompting him to help her, but he didn't. Because she surely would have asked. And he didn't wanna invade her space, even though she was traipsing around in his.

The incredulous look on her face as he unpacked the Asian take-out he ordered for them. When she realised that he actually considered her dietary preferences, which didn't make him feel good about it, but rather made him think. Who had made her feel like she wasn't a priority before?

Content with seeing her munch on a spring roll. Knowing that he fed her, even if he didn't cook it himself. The little pang of possessiveness spreading through his chest. Telling him that he was already too deep into it, but he didn't want it to stop either.

The way his heart jumped when she laughed at one of his stupid jokes. Which made him want to grin back at her. And make another joke, just to do it all again.

He didn't know when the last time was that he laughed that much.

Oh and the filthy nasty hard sex. His need to take her in every room in his house, on every possible surface there was. Starting at the bar in his party room, propped over the sturdy wooden furniture. In his bed, in the shower. On the counter in his kitchen. Then in his bed again.

After they spent the whole weekend together, he didn't want to have her leave, but he also knew it would've been ridiculous to have her stay, so she went home again.

When he called her because she couldn't sleep and he just needed to hear her voice. And he would have been content with that, but he could have never refused when she asked him to help her come. Guiding her through it with whispered instructions, her sweet sounds and choked moans spurring him on as well.

When he came over to her apartment, and she had cooked for him. And she showed him the games on her computer and he couldn’t stop teasing her while she was ingame. Getting her to be more open with him, to tell him what she liked, building a trust between them.

When he broke the bed fucking her the next moment and he asked her to stay at his place, the shame and guilty conscience of destroying her furniture with his thrusts (ugh) were driving his offer. Not thinking about other implications or what it would mean to have her stay with him.

For example, that she would see his reading glasses. That he totally wasn’t hiding from her. But she didn’t mind them at all, quite the contrary, if the way she dropped to her knees was any indication.

When he tied her to his bed then, he made her come over and over again. Wringing orgasms from her body, reading her every move, as she writhed, crying out. Her sounds getting muffled by the panties he stuffed between her lips, shutting her bratty mouth up in the best way. Worshipping her the way he knew how to while at the same time punishing her for mouthing off at him. When he finally sank into her, he loosened the cuffs, her pussy warm and tight around him, her thighs shaking, her frame shivering as she pulled him in. Her lips pressed to his, their chests up against each other, the skin sweaty, but he just needed her closer.

Pushing into her, he was so close already, then she looked up at him, that familiar expression on her face as her mouth dropped open. He was done for, even before that image and the feel of her underneath him burned into his mind.

And it didn’t help when she asked him if they could do it without a condom. His brain almost short-circuited, when he hadn’t allowed himself to be that close with anybody in quite some time, not dating somebody exclusively as they put it, and he entirely lost it as she sank down on his length. Her warmth and wetness around his dick was divine, and he just desperately tried not to burst with how she was squeezing him.

The soft look on her face, the way her breath caught in her throat… Fuck, she was too beautiful.

She weaseled her way into his life and he unintentionally welcomed her with open arms, because he didn't have any defenses against her bubbly nature and her genuine smile. Like a bright beam of sunshine that was tickling his nose. Getting closer and closer until it felt unnatural to not have her by his side.

And he still couldn't believe that she just saw him.

She didn't say anything. But he could tell that she knew. Ever since they talked about his work, well, he talked mostly and she listened. Soaked in the little bits and pieces about him that he dropped while talking. She just saw him, without even knowing his real name.

He kind of was waiting for her to pack up and leave, but she didn't. She didn't run away when he had bad days. The ones with the night terrors too. They were few and far between while being with her, and most days he even managed to get out of his slump, so she probably didn't notice.

Except for that one time, when he snapped at her, though he didn’t even mean too, mad at himself, not at her, and he saw the expression on her face fall before she practically fled the room. On those days it was hard for him not to hate himself.

Running after her, apologising. And when her arms closed around his waist, her head rested on his chest, and she told him everything was okay, he could almost believe it.

She fell asleep on him, after they fucked. Her eyebrows were turned up, his face turned in his direction like she was looking at him, but her lids were closed, her breath steady, just the tiniest of snores dropping from her lips.

His hands pushing her hair back, his fingers caressing her cheek, so soft. She was so soft and warm against him. So alive.

That thought flipped the switch in him.

The cold feeling of dread gripped him from beneath, like icy flames licking up his body as the familiar sensation set in. He tried to breathe through it, not to wake her up. Softly caressing down her back. Pulling her a little closer against his chest, suppressing a shiver.

He thought, he could do it. Maybe he would be strong enough this time, to not go down that spiral. But the thought of leaving somebody behind still scared him too much.

Fuck, that's why he stopped. Stopped building connections to people. It had been a conscious decision, and an easy one at that. Not relying on anybody else, and more importantly, not having anybody rely on him.

What could he give her anyway? Other than a few orgasms.

She made the house feel lively, although it was a little messier. Leaving her things in his space. Bringing her kitty with her, the rascal turning everything inside out.

Sitting beside him on the couch. And it still felt like his space.

She managed to drag him outside, not just for walks in the greenery. She made feel him lively too.

This much younger woman. Warm, soft and tiny against his chest. Who fit so perfectly against him, like a puzzle piece. Who looked like she was smiling, even in her sleep. So alive.

He shouldn't have let it come this far. He has to leave either way, going on the next mission, and he can't have her waiting for him. It wouldn't be fair to her. She shouldn’t wait for him, and she shouldn't grief if he didn't return.

It hasn't even been a month, it will be okay.

She's gonna be okay. In the long run, she's gonna be okay. Maybe find somebody who was better suited for her. Younger. With less baggage. Somebody who was easier to love. Who deserved her.

So, he needed to say goodbye, even if it will make him miserable.

Hearing her cry through the door after he ended things made him wanna burst through it, for a moment at least. A pang of regret cutting through the resolve he had built, but he still left.

Driving home in silence, not daring to listen to music. The playlist she put together of their favourite songs still opened on his phone, and he closed the app instead of pressing play.

The silence was eerie, feeling almost suffocating when he sat in his living room. The room where they spent so much time. His mind wasn’t able to focus on the book he tried to read, his thoughts always coming back to her. In her apartment. With her new bed.

He sighed and went upstairs to his bedroom, getting his clothes off, when the hair tie she lent him fell out of his pocket. He picked it up and just looked at the little thing.

Fuck. I'm such an asshole.

With a groan, he laid down, trying to find some sleep, the thing that lulled him in being her scent that still lingered on the sheets. He should have changed them, was the last thing on his mind before he fell asleep.

So, he went on the mission. Like he had always done. Gone for weeks and months at a time.

Yet this time he took something from home with himself. Because everything reminded him of her... His favourite songs intertwined with the memory of her singing or humming along when they listened to them.

Remembering that she used his shampoo for a while, how his scent would be all over her, but still sweeter, more herself. He sighed and washed his hair, damning the shampoo and himself. Putting it in a ponytail, with the hair tie she gave him.

Smoking a cigarette. A bad habit that he had under wraps most of the time but couldn't shake when he was on duty. Remembering the one cigarette they shared, in front of the bar where they first met.

More than once he caught himself looking at a picture of her on his phone. At pictures of them together. And their similarities became as obvious as the differences he had used to convince himself.

His mind revolved around her whenever he had a moment to himself. Wondering how she was doing. If she thought of him as well. Probably not.

He thought it would have been a distraction to know that she would be waiting for him at home. That the responsibility of staying alive would have been too much.

Seeing the relieve on his family's faces every time he returned broke his heart. He didn't die, this time. Not returning anymore after his grandma died and barely having anybody to care for him in his new surroundings freed him from that.

And she would have brought that back. Or at least so he thought. Knowing that there wouldn't be anybody waiting at home, it made him more reckless. It didn't matter anyway if he lived or died. And while that thought soothed him before, it made him all the more anxious and bitter now.

When a grenade exploded just a little too close to him, it threw him back against a wall and his senses blurred for a moment. The dizzy darkness in front of his eyes vanished and the ringing in his ears turned into her laughter, and he knew that he was fucked.

One evening, after one too many glasses he finally confided in someone. Horangi just laughed and patted his back. "You're in love, my friend.", he simply said. The younger man who had an eye for what's going on always told him plainly how he sees it.

"I guess I am. And I fucked it up." Telling Horangi about how he broke up with her, and he just shook his head.

"Of course. You always find a way to destroy things most efficiently.", he said, not an ounce of judgment in his voice.

König scoffed, taking another drink. "Thanks, just what I needed to hear."

Horangi pulled up an eyebrow, the look on his face alone calling him out on his shit.

"Yeah, yeah, don't look at me like that.", König grumbled. He finished his drink, getting up to finally head to bed.

Horangi's hand held him back.

"You want her back?"

"I don't think she will take me back."

"That's not what I was asking, dipshit."

König sighed. "I want her back.", he said, the thought sobering him a little.

"Then you at least gotta try."

Another pat on the back and König makes his way to his room. Only one thought on his mind.

I gotta at least try.

for the sake of completeness: the Masterlist

also sorry it took me so long to update, i finally finished my degree which took more brainpower and time than anticipated :') i hope you understand <3 thanks for reading and tune in soon for the return of the king - i will try to update within the week <3

#metalhead!könig #she likes the dark #könig #könig cod #könig mw2 #konig #konig cod #konig mw2 #könig fanfiction #cod mw2 smut #könig smut #konig smut #cod smut #könig x reader #tw: age gap

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

New Rule: Gender Apartheid | Real Time with Bill Maher

And finally, New Rule: if you're out protesting for a couple of hours wearing this...

... you have to go all the way and spend an afternoon running errands wearing one of these.

You can't side with the people who ruthlessly oppress women without at least getting a taste of what you're supporting.

Well, now that summer is here and the Hamas-backing college protesters have dispersed back to their summer internships at Goldman Sachs, I thought it might be a good time to say this: I actually admire your youthful idealism, and our world would be poorer without it. Much like your parents who just wasted 300 grand on that ignorance factory you call a college.

Not that I think it's your fault, being this poorly educated and morally confused. That takes a village. Shitty schools, overindulgent parents, social media, that priest who rubbed lotion on you.

But three cheers to you for at least having the impulse to seek a cause in something bigger than yourself. It's just that the one you picked, you missed the boat by a fucking mile.

But here's the good news. You want a cause? Cuz I totally got one for you. Apartheid. Yeah, apartheid, the thing you've been shouting about with Israel for months. Never mind that Israeli Arabs are actually full citizens. You learned that word from a 2 Chainz song and discovered that protesting South Africa's apartheid in the 80s was a righteous cause, and so it was. To this day, when celebrities are asked, who is the person they most admire, one name is always the safest choice.

So, naturally, when you heard that Israel was an apartheid state it gave you such a boner you literally pitched a tent.

You knew how wrong it was when tens of millions of South Africans had been treated like second class citizens just because of their race.

But here's the thing. Today, right now, hundreds of millions of women are treated worse than second class citizens. When you mandate that one category of human beings don't even have the right to show their face, that's apartheid. And it goes on in a lot of countries.

For the last couple years, women in Iran have been saying, "take this hijab and shove it." Because in 2022, a young woman named Mahsa Amini was arrested for wearing her mandatory hijab incorrectly and then died in police custody. And now security forces have killed over 500 people protesting her death and this obvious human rights violation. How about defunding those police?

Amnesty International says that, "Iranian authorities are waging a war on women that subjects them to constant surveillance beatings sexual violence and detention." What P. Diddy calls a hotel stay.

In Iran, MeToo isn't a movement, it's what a woman says when another woman says, my life sucks.

Yasmine Muhammad is a human rights activist who got married off to a Muslim man with fundamentalist views about women not exactly uncommon in the Muslim world. He forced her to wear the niqab all the time, including once beating her because she took her hijab off at home, because the apartment had a window through which people might see in. And this was in Vancouver.

Here's what Yasmine said about veiling.

"It just suppresses your humanity entirely. It's like a portable sensory deprivation chamber and you are no longer connected to humanity. You can't see properly. You can't hear properly. You can't speak properly. People can't see you. You can only see them. Just little things. Passing people on the street and just making eye contact and smiling, that's gone. You're no longer part of this world, and so you very quickly just shrivel up into nothing under there."

And that's my answer when someone says "Islamophobe."

Really, feminists? Come on, there's got to be a happy medium between a husband making his wife wear this, and a husband making his wife wear this.

I know 1619 was bad, but this is happening right now, right under your nose rings. And it's not just the clothes. 15 countries in the Middle East, including Gaza, have laws that require women to obey their husbands. Laws. Not just Harrison Butker's opinion.

And those societies also have guardianship laws, which means a woman needs permission from her husband to work, to travel, to leave the house, to go to school, to get medical attention. Nothing?

Honor killings, where women are murdered by their own fathers and-or brothers happen so frequently they can't even have an accurate account of how many.

In 59 countries, there are no laws against sexual harassment in the workplace, and many have no laws against domestic violence or spousal rape. 20 countries have marry-your-rapist laws. Multiple societies have laws about what jobs women can and can't do. Make a Barbie movie about that. 30 countries practice female genital mutilation, and 650 million women alive today were married as children.

Kids, if you really want to change the world and not just tie up Monday morning traffic, this is the apartheid that desperately needs your attention. Gender apartheid. This is what should be the social justice issue of your time. How about, from the river to the sea, every woman shall be free?

But in reality, it's not an issue at all. For one reason: the people who are doing it aren't white. I hate to have to be the one to break it to you kids, but non-white people can do bad things too. Now, white on black racism certainly has been of one of history's most horrific scourges. But also, it's true that in today's world being non-white means you can get away with murder.

So good on you kids for following your instinct to protest social injustice. Just remember, when it comes to finding a cause, pulling your head out of your ass is an important rite of passage.

==

They won't do it not just because it's Intersectionally inconvenient, but also because it would require admitting that, as citizens of first world countries and students of Ivy League universities, not only do they not live in a "patriarchy," but they're some of the freest, most privileged, most self-determining people who have ever lived in the world at any time, ever.

And, having spent decades crafting a narrative of being long-suffering and "oppressed," they'd have to surrender the significant social, political and economic capital that narrative affords, by fighting for women in Iran, Gaza, Afghanistan and other countries to have the same rights and privileges they take for granted. And regularly spit on.

#Bill Maher #Real Time with Bill Maher #pro palestine #college protests #student protests #feminism #western feminism #islam #hijab #Yasmine Mohammed #Iran #islamic regime #Mahsa Amini #iran protests #gender apartheid #apartheid #islam ruins everything #gaza strip #anti apartheid #this is islam #religion #religion is a mental illness #Youtube

[submissive-wifey]

𝙏𝙤 𝙈𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙈𝙚 Stop Crying Ft. Husband Scaramouche

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ Warning ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

ᰔ afab! reader ᰔ mentioned of both female and male reproductive system ᰔ overthinking ᰔ nsfw! under the cut

So, I am currently having a mix feelings since before and a hundreds of negative thoughts was crossing on my mind about what if my husband don't love me anymore, what if he got tired of me or he find me just a bother? I know that he's busy since he is the 6th Harbinger of the 11th Fatui but I couldn't help but to think such things.

Maybe, what if he is already having a love affair? What if there is another woman..?

Those thoughts made me feel like I was stabbed straight to my heart and I decided to go to his office to check him out if he's doing alright.

I knocked on the door softly and heared unfamiliar feminine voice, my heart skips a beat before opening the door and saw him sitting on his chair with another girl standing in front of his table wearing a very short skirt.

"What do you want?" He said with his husky voice in annoyance. I gulped in nervousness since my heart skipping every other beat but I still keep my cool because of that girl, she had a face as pale as porcelain and looked like a ghost except for her light short green hair and her hazel eyes which seemed to bore into my soul and gave me the creeps with how cold they were while she stood in front of him with a frown on her disgusting lips. She glared at me as if she has some beef with me and I don't even know her, but why is she in my husband's office?

A thought suddenly strikes me about my overthinking that what if I'm right? What if he was actually having a love affair with a seductress?

I mean, she looks like a whore.

My brain helpfully supplied and I shook away these thoughts. No one's sleeping with my man. It wasn't like he was a virgin. That girl probably just wanted some sex with his money. But that didn't mean she should be here. Her presence alone makes me feel so uneasy.

"I just wanted to check if you're doing alright since we've barely see each other." I replied softly with a fake smile on my lips, I felt a bit guilty that I couldn't get my hands off of my dress. I felt like such a fool for thinking my husband would cheat on me and I was trying to act nonchalant about it and keep up appearances when I really wanted to cry right then and there. I had this horrible feeling that my husband cheated on me by being with another woman while I sat at home and waited for him like an idiot.

"You do know that I'm busy, Y/N" He inhaled deeply and crossed his arms as leaned against his chair, he looked like he wants to say something but stopped himself before saying anything."Yes, I know you have a lot of work, I can see it from your office." I said looking around and saw that there was a disorganized documents on his table and some papers scattered on the floor.

"So, I wanted to talk to you about-" "No" He cut off my words abruptly. His face had a stern expression and his indigo eyes with a bold red eyeliner glistened as they focused on mine, but there was something about them that sent chills down my spine. I felt like his eyes were staring straight into my soul and could read my every little feeling. They also held an unknown emotion and I was unsure of what was going through his mind at that moment.

"No?" I repeated. He took in another deep breath, exhaling slowly and let out another sigh before leaning forward with both arms resting on the surface of his desk. He stared at my chest which he knew by now that I wore a simple tight black dress that showed my toned legs with a v neck which reveals my cleavage, but I didn't wear any shoes. He was still gazing into my eyes intently as he spoke again,"I said no."

"But you didn't-" He cut me off again, "Y/N, I am busy. I told you already that I don't have enough time to spend with you lately.""Why not?" I questioned curiously. I know I shouldn't ask those questions, but his stare made it hard for me to control myself,"Because you are an absolute nuisance. You keep spitting unnecessary things." "That's impossible. You always tell me whenever I have a question. Now, answer me this, is my husband cheating on me?"

I heared my heart pounding loudly in my ears when I ask him my question and gripping on my dress to ease the emotion I felt. He then grit his teeth as he close his eyes in irritation before turning his gaze back to me. "GET OUT!" He shouted as if he's commanding me to get out of the office. He then pointed at the door with anger shining in his indigo eyes. I felt like crying. But instead of letting tears come out, I just ran out of his office.

My heart couldn't accept what he said to me and I immedietly stormed straight to my room and lock the door as my tears started flowing.

I threw myself on the bed and burried my face on the pillows to minimize my sobs.

And at the present moment, I continued sobbing for the past 2 hours. Hoping he is not cheating on me with that girl, wishing he would remain faithful to me but he is sophisticated and attractive man that would eventually the ladies will try to seduce him.

I only wished him to cuddle with me but then he shut me out with his hurful statement.

I hug my pillow tightly as my heart continue to bawl out. I never knew that such things existed but I was too dumbfounded and scared to ask about them. He was a professional person who rarely gets involved with the women's industry because of his integrity. He wouldn't cheat on me right? I asked myself that. Maybe he was just jealous that other women got ahead of him but why didn't he confide in me?

And suddenly, I heard a knock on my door. I didn't respond to it and hoping that person who is knocking on my door will leave since I am currently crying. The knocking continued to grow louder as the moment continued to pass by, but I choose not to pay attention to it.

I sense my door opened and a footsteps echoed inside my bedchamber. The empty space of the bed dips with the heavy weight that I assume belongs to my husband. I didn't bother to look at him but remained burrying my face on the soaked pillow. The mattress sinks in the place where my husband should rest his head.

"I didn't mean to shout at you.." He whispered softly with his husky voice, he sat beside me and he wrap his arm around my waist and kissed my hair lightly. I could feel the warmth radiating from his body, but his cold touch sent shivers down my spine. He pulled me closer to him and nuzzled his face on my hair.

"No." I tried saying a single word with a neutral tone to avoid quavering. "Look at me." He commanded with a stern voice as he tried to cup my cheeks but I push him instead. He fell down on the bed and he let out a loud groan, looking at me in disbelief and I burried my face back to the pillow.

"I see how it is.." He rolled me over and pinning me under him as he grab my wrists, forcing them above my head. "What are you doing!?" I shrieked as I squirmed and struggle to get away. It seems that the way to deal with me was just to pin me down and make sure that I'm under him until I finally calm down.

"You're throwing a tantrum which gives me a headache and I refuse to listen to your damn crying! You're going to give me something in return for taking your stupid emotional outburst!" He yelled at me with a furious tone of his voice and I flinched. It didn't take long before he pinned my legs together making my breath catch on my throat and I could feel tears streaming down my face.

He leaned down and he start giving me light kisses on the side of my neck, leaving a row of a light bruises and kiss marks on it. He then continued leaving an array of light markings on my neck as if he starts to enjoy himself at the taste of my skin as his kisses making their way down to my collarbone that made me gasps softly.

"Now, are you going to stop your damn crying, Y/N?" He asked me sounding rather amused and satisfied at the same time. My cries slowly stopped after he left a few more light bruises on me. "Good." I hear him mumble. Butterflies started to ramble on my stomach as he continued his bold actions on me and I started to feel my cheeks burning at the sensation of his markings.

"S-Stop.." I gasps softly since he is now activating my hormones. "Why should I? I deserve a reward for putting up with your constant stubbornness." He move up to my ear and whispered those words with his husky voice and a goosebumps crawls on my skin.

I bit my lip to avoid making those sounds he was trying to trigger and struggles to remove my hands away from his grasps.

"Ah... Ah.." He grumbles as he tightened his grip on my wrist, moving his kisses to the base on my neck before sinking his teeth into my soft delicate skin as just hard enough to leave a light possessive mark. "No biting, You will not hide the sweet sounds you make."

"S-Scara..." My breathing became shallow as soon as I felt his teeth on my skin and I let out a soft moans as the shivers running down to my spine. "So, you finally decided to stop crying." He says while removing his lips from the sensitive part of my neck, leaving behind two wet red trails that makes me shudder involuntarily.

"S-Scaramouche.. Please.. Stop.. " My body went stiff once his hot breath hit the sensitive spot causing me to shiver even harder. My heartbeat started getting irregular with each passing second, as all thoughts were gone except one: 'I want it.'

"Maybe if your moans get loud enough, I might think about stopping." He whispered on my skin as he gave the new mark one more lick before moving to the other side of my collarbone. I let out a muffled scream at the pain that he inflicted on me. His kisses were starting to be too much and it felt like my whole body was going to melt if he keeps doing this. And yet his lips weren't on mine yet. I didn't dare to open my mouth, not wanting to give him the satisfaction knowing that I was enjoying this torture.

I then averted my gaze from him to hide the blush on my cheeks and he grumbles as he places his fingers under my chin, forcing me turn my head back to face him again. "Now, who told you to look away from me? You will stop holding your moans back and make those lovely sounds for me." He demanded in a low demanding tone and my eyes widen at the sudden order. "Don't be so disobedient.." His finger trailed along the edge of my jawline. "Please..." I whimpered helplessly and he laughed before sinking his teeth once again into the base of my neck leaving a dark, harsh looking bite mark on the skin as he feels another shaky breath from me.

He lift himself away from me for a bit and moves his leg before looking at me dead in the eyes as his leg brushing against my cloth entrance. His breathing grows heavier as he sees my legs shaking causing me to arch into him as I hold the blanket tightly on both sides of me.

"Mhmm.. S-Scara..!" My breath hitches when he added more friction and angled his leg properly on my sensitive spot. He groans in response when I called out his name as if he's unable to hold back the sound that wanted to make its way from his throat.

"I need to hear you say those words.." He whispers between his heavy breathing as he move his leg in a circular motion against me, my breathing grow more shallow as I continue to shake for him. He pant quietly as he leans in even closer, leaning down and starts to trail kisses along my jawline.

"Hahh... I'm.. I'm yours.." I looked at him with a bawdy expression before inhaling deeply while moaning sofly. His breathe hitches in his throat as he hears me give him the answer he wanted. I could feel a satisfied smile growing on his face as he hears the words fall from my mouth, his body started shaking a bit from the heat that had taken over. "That's a good girl..." He praised as he move his head away from my jawline, looking down at me with his eyes shining and a sinister smile appeared on his lips. He started kissing my face repeatedly before placing his mouth on the soft spot below my earlobe while his hand travels to my core. He caresses my wet folds through my panties as he rubs slow circles over my swollen cloth clit. I squirm and gasp loudly as my body started reacting to what he's doing to me and I can't keep myself composed any longer.

He close his eyes and bites down on his own lip as he feels the heat of my body through his clothes. He leans in and plants a soft kisses on my lips and moving his hand on my thigh that was circling on my cloth folds before, brushing two fingers on my inner thigh that made me feel all tingly inside and my breath hitch and I started trembling uncontrollably.

"I'll show you how much you can take of me." He said in a hoarse deep voice. I let out a moan just like he wanted as my body is already preparing to get ready for him. Feeling hotter and hotter.

His other hand moves up to my breast making me let out a small moan that only fuels him further and he lets out another husky chuckle before his thumb started rubbing around my hardened nipple and my eyes closed as I tried to relax myself but it's impossible. His movements were slow and deliberate as he continues caressing my heated body.

"Please, S-Scaramouche.. I couldn't keep up any longer." I whined as the feeling of his touches intensified and he laughs before he slowly lifts his own hips as he pushes his pants and underwear off his legs and letting it land somewhere on the ground. Shivering as I feel his own body getting even warmer than before. I look up to him, feeling slightly dizzy and a desperate expression can be seen on my face. He was breathing shaky and heavy, "Are you ready...?"

I nod quickly without a word and he smirks playfully at me before he slowly move the hem of my dress and taking off my panty, he then grab my legs and pulled them apart until they are wide opened. He grabs one of my legs and placed it on top of his shoulder, I felt so open and vulnerable in front of him especially when he is staring at me intensely like I am his prey. As soon as he starts teasing the center of my opening, my whole world gets turned upside down and I can't help but cry out loud with pleasure as his fingers started digging inside my wet velvety walls.

"Ahhh... Ohh... S-Scara... Ahhh!"

He groaned lowly, moving faster against me as my cries grew louder and I wrapped my legs tighter around his shoulder. I felt my body start to get weak and he chuckled before wrapping my legs around his shoulders again and continuing the action. "You're so wet..." He moaned with his mouth near my ear causing my already tight core to tighten even more.

At the part where I'm about to reach my climax, he stopped. The feeling of emptiness spread all over my body as I felt a wave of disappointment washed over me. I breathe heavily and look at him curiously, wondering why he stopped, I saw him smirk evilly before pulling out all his fingers from me, making me whine in frustration. His eyes shifting to look down on my legs as he positioned his body in between them, he stares at my hole, licking his lips lightly as he started pushing my legs to spread even wider. He looks at me with a smirk, "Ready?~"

My husband's member is so huge and veiny almost bigger than my entire body. He is still coated with pre cum, which makes me wonder just how long it takes before he came. It seems like it doesn't take long at all since he hasn't started thrusting his thick member yet. He wrap his fingers around his shaft, stroking it slowly and I watch causing sparks of electric feelings to fly around on my stomach. My heart rate quickened at the thought that he could just thrust real hard, deeper inside of me. I feel so hot and aching in just an instant.

"Mhmm... Yeah.." I answered breathlessly as I bite on my lower lip. Watching how he stroke his shaft up and down with his fingers in anticipation. And with that, my eyes rolled at the back of my head before I threw my head on the bed board and released a loud moan, gripping onto the sheets tightly because of the intense pleasure I felt out of a sudden entrance of his massive cock.

Author's Note :

[ I got the art icons from pinterest ]

I'm falling in love with this first POV writing style ahhh!

Request are open btw!

[ Reblogging my post appreciated! 🍷💕 ]

#genshin smut #scaramouche #scaramouche smut #genshin fanfic #genshin imagines #eventual smut #genshin x reader #kunikuzushi #scara x reader #submissive-wifey'sunderthecut #afab reader #reader insert #fem reader #female reader

[blacclotusss]

No Pain

My thoughts and opinions on IWTV s02e03: No Pain

Talamasca

This whole scene with the Talamasca agent did confuse me for a bit. It threw me off when he began acting as if he were talking on the phone, but I was definitely locked into it. He's the RJ sending Daniel things as he's talking with Armand and I want to know what he knows and how Daniel will use it in this situation. I need to know what his role will be in unpacking all of whatever is going to come out in the end. 

Lestat & Armand's Relationship

Dumpster fire, just as I thought. I can see the appeal of it and the way Armand showcased his power was everything to me. Him knocking and turning Lestat every way but loose was hilarious, but I always love seeing Lestat lose. I called it a dumpster fire because you could kind of tell that it wasn't anything deeper than the lust they had for each other, at least in the way Armand told it. There seems to be a lot of omission on Armand's part and I wish I could search his brain to see exactly what it was he left out. Maybe as the season goes on, we'll see more of what's inside that head and underneath that mysterious exterior.  

Louis and Armand's First Dates

In the words of Johnny Gill: My. My. My. The way this date took so many twists and turns I could hardly keep up. Firstly, it was fun to see their little banter about the blocking of thoughts. Even when it got a bit intense with Armand clocking every time Louis thought about that man, it wasn't too crazy and we were able to see them reel it back in. Louis mentions letting Armand in instead of allowing his thoughts to spill and I want to know if Louis even trusts Armand that much to allow that if he could block his thoughts. But, the real kicker was when the two stopped to talk by the river. Flirty Louis is one of my favorite facets of the man and he was laying it on thick. Everything from the way the words rolled off of his tongue to the head movements to the accent was pure perfection. And the way he walked up into Armand's space as if he were going to kiss him...chef's kiss on everyone's part. I loved the way Armand was taken aback, yet intrigued, with Louis' responses as well.  

Now, the intensity of the date in the little bar was through the roof. I'm still wondering why Louis is calling himself a whore for being out with other men. I know there's a reason, but I can't get my thoughts together on it. Maybe someone can help me out with that. Is it him still feeling attached to this man as his first real love? Is it the pain and brokenness coming through? Is it guilt for killing his love and leaving him back home? And the way Armand picks his brain apart and gets him to confess his relationship with Lestat was really something. It's pretty sad to see Louis' thoughts, feelings, and pain affect him like this. He deserves some happiness.  

Claudia Talking About Bruce

Wow. This woman has been through so damn much in her life it's baffling. In season one, we see Louis omit the details of her assault so we didn't know the severity of it. Here, we still don't have gruesome detail (thank God) but to just think about the fact that she was not only assaulted once, but multiple times and kept under the floorboards by him. Do you know how insane that is? To not know when it'll ever stop. When they'll get tired of your "gloomy faces"? Every person Claudia has encountered has done her wrong. Every. Single. One. And that including Louis as well because he didn't even have to have her turned in the first place. I know the coven is going to put her through it even more than they already have, but I'll save that for later. Oh how I wish she could live her life the way she wants with no one in her way or trying to put her in a box. 

Armand Choosing Love

Oh these two. THESE TWO. Every scene with them has my stomach doing flips. Firstly, can we talk about that tunnel scene? It's a scene that should put fear in your heart for Louis, but it's simply a build up for their first kiss in my opinion. Louis is ready to die and he's preparing himself for it while Armand stands behind him like an ominous being running his fingers through his curls and down the back of his neck. It just sends shivers down your spine in the best way. "You walked me home?" "Did I?" Please! The little moment the two share before Armand walks up to him...whew. I don't know if Armand is telling the truth about being hurt (I have an inclination that he is), I'd like to think he is, but the wavering in both of their voices hit me in the chest. The kiss?! Resuscitate me, immediately! The caresses on the face and the way Armand pulls him back in each time! I had to fan myself each time I watched it (yes, I watched it numerous times and no, it's not weird.) Just when you think it's over, Louis invites the man upstairs and I need to see the tape! But, Armand choosing love and choosing something for himself definitely opens the door for the coven to do as they please with Claudia since Maitre isn't doing his job and this frightens me.  

Claudia and Her Role in the Coven

Were they hazing my girl in this episode?! All this for a speck of a spot in this coven? Electric chair just for that. And as soon as Claudia thinks she's in and has met her people, they betray her by making her play a little girl...and for 50 years at that. She's been trying to get out of this "little girl" role for the longest and now she's stuck. I can't imagine the way she's feeling about this. And we also see Armand getting involved with her physically, which...oh boy. It's just a hot mess all around. I now see what Armand meant when he said his name was in those pages and why he wouldn't want them seen. Some part of me is still being delusional about her fate. Maybe she will survive and live her life the way she planned (yes, I know this is not reality.)  

#interview with the vampire #amc interview with the vampire #vampterview #louis de pointe du lac #claudia iwtv #the vampire armand #lestat de lioncourt #daniel molloy #talamasca #the vampire claudia #the vampire louis #iwtv

[figsnpassionfruits]

Paint Away, My Little Dove - Chapter 8

A/N: wohoo this was rly fun to write holy shit. this is also my first smut ever so yay! this is also the longest chapter i have done yet so it should make up for the long wait <33 word count: 4.4k tags: arthur morgan x fem!reader, fluff, age gap, smut, creampie, kinda cockwarming but nor rly?, tiny bit of angst dividers by: @strangergraphics-archive pictures are from pinterest

It had been a few days before Arthur joined you in Strawberry. Even though you were used to spending time alone; it felt off this time. The last time you had been together was right after a robbery of a trolley station in Saint Denis went wrong. What caused you all the worry was the fact that saying goodbye was left with not the usual fuzzy and warm feeling in your chest, but more of an unrest.

But now, it felt okay again.

You were nested in the big bed in your rented room, leaning against Arthurs bicep as you rubbed your feet on his toned quads. His thick fingers were lingering on your skin, travelling from one spot to another every once in a while. The sound of the rain hitting the windows filled the air with comfort. It had been cloudy and rainy for a few days now, mimicking your state of mind.

“Dutch wants t’get back at Bronte for trickin’ us.” He mumbled; eyes set on the stained ceiling.

You sighed. This could have been avoided easily by just not believing that man. Who in their right mind would trust Angelo Bronte out of all people? “You think that’s smart?”

“Nah.” Arthur chuckled. “If there’s a reason to get back at that son of a bitch, it ain’t the robbery. Now ain’t the time anyway. Dutch’s just been blinded by money ‘n revenge.”

“You could use me as bait.”

Arthur sat up slightly, looking at you like you were a ghost. “Are ya insane, woman?” He questioned, eyes widening at the thought of putting you in such a dangerous situation. It would have been considerable if you had been one of the women at camp, who were used to being exposed to robberies and dangerous positions. But you; you were an artist. Even if you had been in life-or-death situations before, for Arthur, there was no need to put you in another.

You rested your hands on his chest, feeling the hairs on the skin prickling your palms, attempting to calm him down. “Arthur. He said he wanted me dead or alive. I don’t know what he will do to you if you don’t do as he says.” You explained, caressing an arm of his, tilting your head, trying to get him to hold eye contact with you again. “He’s got a lot of men behind him.”

“That I ain’t worried about.” Arthur took your hands into a single of his, holding them firmly by your wrists. “Darlin’, the camp doesn’t know about ya. I don’t want yerself to get involved into their plans. Not now at least. Things are too foggy.”

The rain had gotten stronger now, hitting the windows with more force than before, creating a thudding sound each time. Things were ought to get more complicated from now on. It had seemed like the air around you got a bit chillier, urging you to wrap the blanket you were sitting on now around your shoulders.

“Would it be so bad to let your camp know about me?”

“I don’t know, sweetheart.”

……………………………………………..

The fine line between autumn and winter could create the most unpredictable weathers. What was pouring down from the sky a few days prior in masses, was now flowing peacefully on the banks. The brisk air caused the hairs on your body to rise, yet the moderate warmth of the sun demanded them to stay down.

“Not far anymore.” You mumbled, readjusting the grip on your reins as you steered your two horses, careful to not harm the wagon in the process of crossing the river.

Arthur was in front of you, taking the lead to see where it was safe for the hooves to step on. Once on dry ground again, he took out a cigarette from his pocket, igniting it and took a long inhale. Especially for him the past few days have been stressful. From Dutch’s behavior to Bronte’s games to keeping you safe. The poor man could get no rest.

As you two approached the town, the familiar character of Valentine filled your senses. The smell of the sheep and cattle entered your nose while the sound of the people talking filled your ears.

“Ya remember when ya wanted t’sell me somethin’ here?” Arthur smirked, getting off his horse and walking over to you. He offered you his hand to offer you additional support to step down from your wagon.

In response, you rolled your eyes playfully, smiling as you did so. You took his hand, feeling his secure grip on your smaller one as you stepped down, nodding at him once as a small ‘thank you’ gesture. “I’ll get the horses to the stable. They could all use a little luxury. Could you go and get us a room?”

“Yes, mam.” Arthur tipped his hat, walking off to the direction of the hotel, gladly following your order.

After disappearing from your vision, you strutted over to the front of your horses, gripping the reins of Arthurs as well, as you lead all three towards the stables. The sun had not been strong enough to dry out the ground just yet, causing your boots to turn muddier with each step you took.

“Miss Y/N!” The stableman greeted you, cheering at your presence.

“Hey, there.” You smiled, slowing your pace as you walked through the big wooden doors.

“Got quite a collection there. Instead of two, I am now seein’ three.” He joked, taking the reins from your hand, removing your horses from the wagon, and putting them into the boxes they were used to stay in. After being done with storing them, he took the reins of Arthurs Shire, looking at you with a hint of confusion expressed on his face. “What about this fella?”

“Just give him the usual package as well. He belongs to a friend of mine.”

The brunette man nodded, patting the black coated horse on the snout. “Handsome boy.”

You placed your hand on the neck of the tall horse, giving it a few pets. “Good as well.”

“You sellin’ anything while here this time?”

You pouted, taking a breath in through your nose, your eyes glued to the horse still. “Wasn’t planned. I usually send letters to the sheriff prior to make sure it’s fine with him.”

“Well, if you change your mind- go have a talk with him. He’s got a liking to you. That man won’t say no.”

Mumbling a quiet ‘thanks’, you left the stables, making your way to the infamous hotel. The locals were usually the friendliest to you here in Valentine. While passing, people greeted you with a smile or a small wave. They were used to you setting up a stand anytime you were in this town, adoring your paintings whenever they saw it.

After walking up the steps to the upper floor of the hotel, you turned to your right, moving to the room number the manager at the front deck gave you. With quiet knocks you alerted the older man inside, who opened the door not too long after, greeting you with a small smile.

“Horses are taken care of.” You remarked, taking off your shoes and coat before throwing yourself down on the soft texture of the mattress. With the relaxation of your body came the torment of your mind. Now all there was to do was to think. Think about what to say; think about what to change and think about what to do. “What will you do to Bronte?” You asked, breaking the silence.

Arthur peeked up from the table he was standing by, stopping the action of writing into his diary for a brief second. “Don’t know, sweetheart. Dutch keeps talkin’ about money. They want to get Bronte out the way to rob somethin’ bigger. Somethin’ that’s worth all the shootin’.”

“And then what?”

“Camp wants to get away. Dutch is talkin’ about some place called Tahiti. But I just don’t know any more what I want.”

Hearing those words were painful. After all this time, it seemed like his camp was still what was the most important thing to him. If they all left after getting the money they needed; he would follow. You were not present in those plans. How could you be? Arthur had refused to let you meet them for the longest time now. It was not like he was in the wrong. Yet, it still hurt. No matter what would happen he would be with his camp. And you? You were insignificant.

Noticing your silence, Arthur let out a sigh before putting down his diary. He slowly walked over to the bedframe, letting the weight of him drop down to the mattress. After still not looking up at him, he took a finger to place it underneath your chin, guiding your face up to create eye contact. “What is it that ya want, dove?”

“I want a lot.”

“Tell me then.”

“It’s stupid.”

“It can’t be.”

Biting the inside of your cheek, you moved your frame to the middle of the bed, creating space for him to sit on.

Arthur placed a hand now on the side of your head, gently pressing down on it to make you lay your head on his shoulder.

“I want a farm.” You started. “And a gallery, made out of glass, just for my paintings.”

“That so?” Arthur smiled, placing a kiss on your temple.

You hummed to confirm your statement, playing with your fingers, being a little embarrassed after saying your wishes out loud.

“And where exactly would those things be?” Arthur questioned, taking a hand of yours to stop you from fidgeting with them. He had recognized your nervousness. Now again, the age gap made itself be present. You had dreams and a goal in life. For him, that was already over. All he could do was be a servant to the ones who were still fighting. His loyalty was set on the gang. That did not mean that he would simply abandon you for them. Yet, he was torn. Life had given him too many things to balance. It was on him to decide what to throw out of the equation to move things forward.

“Big Valley, maybe? I always tend to go there.”

“Big Valley, huh?”

“Yea, why?”

Arthur let out a chuckle before answering. “That’s the place we first met.”

“Oh.” You giggled. Another silence occurred, forcing the both of you to wrestle with your thoughts again. There was a certain tension in the room; as if things were left unspoken. You had so much to ask him: ‘What about me? What about us? When will you leave? What will I do once you do?’ But where were you supposed to start? Collecting your courage to confront him, you sat up, leaning your body weight on the hand that was propped up on him, earning you a puzzled look from Arthur. “Arthur, I- what are we doing here?”

“What?”

“What is this? We’re always together. We hug and cuddle but what are we doing?”

Arthur continued to stare at you, scanning his eyes all over your face, unable to read your emotions as you questioned your relationship with him. “I-“

“I was hoping you wanted me the way I want you.” There it was. The confession you had bundled up in your chest for weeks. There was no turning back now. You had poured out your heart to him in a single sentence. All that was left for you to do now was to listen what we would say. By looking at him, you could see the wheels in his head turning. He was trying desperately to think before talking.

“I do want ya, sweetheart.” Arthur confessed, placing a hand on your arm, rubbing it affectionately. “It’s just-“ He closed his eyes for a brief moment, smacking his lips once before continuing. “How could a pretty little thin’ like you get out of an old man like me?”

“Arthur, no.” You moaned, moving your body closer to his to place your palm on his brunette beard. “Why would I care about you being older than me?” You knew about the concerns Arthur had about the two of you from his diary entries. Yet this was the first time he confessed it to you verbally. “Arthur you’re the sweetest and kindest man I have ever laid my eyes on. When you asked me before what I want- I wanted to say ‘you’. I wanted to say ‘us’.” You roamed your hands all over his saddened face now, placing a soft kiss on the tip of his nose, making him look at you. “I want us to happen, Arthur. I wanna be yours.” As your voice got quieter but needier, you moved his arm away from his torso, gathering your courage to sit on his lap, your hands still placed near his face. “Please.” You begged, starting to slowly move your hips on his groin. “Call me yours.”

Arthur clenched his jaw at your words, slamming his eyes shut for a second before giving into your devotion. He places his rough hands on your face, pulling you down to him to slam his lips onto yours.

His harsh handling alone made you moan into the kiss, moving your lips to the rhythm of his. It did not take too long for the both of you to roam each other’s mouths with your tongues, the act getting more frantic as the milliseconds passed.

Arthur placed his hands onto your rear, squeezing it tightly and pulling you closer to him to release the tension that had now formed in his tight black pants. He sat up fully, moving his hands now to grasp your hips, flipping you over onto your back. For a second, he broke the kiss, looking into your eyes, scanning you for any hesitation. Not finding any, he dived back into the kiss, causing your heart to beat faster and faster in anticipation.

“Arthur…” You whimpered against his lips, thrusting your lower body in an attempt to get more friction to your heat.

“I know, darlin’.” He whispered, moving his hands down your body, the calloused skin feeling like rocks against your soft frame.

Being displeased about the fact that you were both fully clothed, you took matters into your own hands, leaning on your elbows to pull Arthur shirt over his head after you undid the first few upper buttons.

After mirroring the same action, Arthur slid his hand to your now exposed neck, sucking on skin next to it. He opted to slide his other down to your pants, bringing you closer by gripping the thin fabric, pressing your naked chests closer.

“Take off your clothes.” You managed to whisper in between hungry kisses.

A quiet chuckle rumbled through his chest before he obligated to your request, pulling down his pants propping himself on one arm that was placed next to head on the mattress.

While he was occupied with his, you took off your own, leading to the both of you exposing all of your skin. Placing your hands back on his neck, you pulled him down to you, your lips not being able to get enough of his.

Unhurried, Arthur slithered his hand down your stomach, moving it closer to your cunt. Once there, he cupped it gently, making you moan quietly as you thrusted your hip against it.

“Easy, sweetheart.” He grumbled, the feeling of his hand on your heat sucking the air from your chest.

Your lips brushed against the shell of his ear as he started to move his head down, a shaky groan rolling through his chest as a response.

Setting his hands on the back of your knees, Arthur flipped your legs up, moving an arm of his to hold them up with a single limb. The fresh air hit your warm cunt, causing you to bite your lip at not only the feeling but also on the sight in front of you. “Please.” You begged, tilting your head at the man who was keeping you in place.

The pecks he delivered to your inner thighs travelled closer and closer to where you wanted him, his eyes on you like a predator stalking his prey. He had never heard sounds as pretty as the ones you were giving him, begging to be touched. A thick finger of his swiped through your wet folds, wanting to hear your melodies again. “You’re already soaked for me, dove.” He rasped before putting his face closer to you, his beard tickling your delicate skin. It did not take his tongue long to find your bundle of joy, flicking it continuously, making you close your eyes and lean your head back into the cushions.

“God, Arthur.” You moaned, your voice getting higher from the way your nerves were getting tickled by the sensation.

“Ya taste so good.” He murmured, crawling back up to you to engulf you in another heated kiss, demanding you to taste yourself on his tongue. Arthur began to sink his middle finger into you, deepening the kiss for only a split second before he propped himself back up, staring into your eyes to make sure it felt okay. “This alright, sweetheart?”

You nodded, letting out small gasps in a pathetic attempt to respond to him.

Arthur cooed at you, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead as you squirmed. “Don’t gotta talk. That nod’s good enough. Lemme take care of ya.” His voice got lower and lower with each word, the lust in his body taking over. The finger inside you was curled now, pulling small moans from you. For him, the sounds you were making came straight from heaven. Why did the two of you refuse this for so long?

“I need you inside me.” You cried softly, moving your hips faster against his hand.

“Easy, now.” Arthur rebuked, pulling his hand out of you, causing you to let out a whine. “Ya wanna take me already?”

Giving yourself a small moment to think about his question, you shook your head, making Arthur tilt his head. “I wanna taste you as well.” You demanded, pushing his body off you to put yourself on all fours.

Arthur was now on his knees, allowing you to take control for the meantime. His already hard cock was in front you, throbbing and asking to be touched in any way. As you put a hand on his dick, Arthurs hands travelled to your hair, holding it back and out of your face to allow himself to have no blockage of the view. With eyes set on his blue ones, you licked a trail from his base to his tip, causing Arthur to let out a low moan as he leaned his head back. After all the years of torment and stress his body has been going through, this was needed; badly.

You wrapped your lips around his cock, focusing on the tip when you swirled your tongue as you bopped your head. Your hand was travelling along on his cock, making sure to stroke what you were not able to fit into your mouth.

“You’re a pretty little thing, ain’t ya? Good girl.” Arthur cussed, the breath in his voice hitching as you kept sucking him off.

As a reply you hummed around him, Arthur whimpering at the sound of it.

“Just lemme-“ Arthur noted, placing a hand on the back of your neck while the other found his way below your chin. “Keep yer mouth open for me, darlin’, alright?”

You looked up at him, nodding once to let him know whatever was coming was okay for you. You noticed the hesitation in him. Arthur required your approval for every single thing he wished to do. The poor man had been through so much in his life. This was a way for you to let him release it all. If anyone deserved it, it was Arthur.

With your permission, he started to thrust into your mouth, the action creating vulgar sounds that filled the hotel room.

“Got the prettiest little throat.” Arthur groaned, saying the words in between the fast thrusts he was doing. He licked his lips once before moderately slowing them down, only to push your head further into him, letting go of you once you gagged. A trail of spit remained glued from his cock to your lips when you pulled back, his eyes darkening with craving at the sight of it.

After collecting your breath, you looked up at the man from your hands and knees, flashing a big smile and biting your bottom lip.

“Ya really like this, don’t cha?”

You hummed in approval, a hand of yours pumping his cock, refusing to leave it without any attention. “Now, I want you inside of me.”

As a reply, Arthur flipped you onto your back again, one single hand holding both of your legs up by the back of your knees. He first placed a thumb on your clit, skillfully rubbing a figure eight against the sensitive patch.

The eye contact you both remained could turn anyone primal. Sucking air in between your teeth, you moaned his name, needy to feel his cock in you.

Once he removed his hand from your heat, Arthur soaked in the view from your wet folds, this angle allowing him to take in each pore.

In protest from the lack of touch, you slid your own hand down your body, rubbing yourself with three fingers.

Instead of fighting for the control, Arthur simply watched your hand, enjoying the sight of your delicate fingers rubbing against your glistening body. “No art of yers is gonna be able to touch the beauty of this.”

You giggled at his words, your heartbeat speeding up as he propped himself up, licking his own hand for some lubrication to rub it on his tip before pumping his shaft a few times. Once he contacted your skin, he rubbed himself against your soaked cunt. As he sank himself slowly into you, you hissed at the feeling of being stretched out by the man you were in love with. To get him closer to you, you put a hand on the back of his neck, forcing him to lean his forehead against yours as he disappeared in you, inch by inch, letting out a long and low groan as he did.

“Atta girl,” He breathed out, the large hand he had placed on your legs now gripping tighter onto the thin skin there. “Takin’ me so good already.”

“You feel so good.” You moaned out, pupils wide and mouth hanging open at the filling feeling of him inside you. Your pulse was now at its high, your heart feeling like it could burst out of your chest.

Arthur placed several light kisses on your legs, hip hips now slowly going back and forth, watching his cock get more soaked with each time he pulled back of you. After a while of repeating this, he struggled with holding himself back from gaining speed, asking you if it was alright for him to take things faster. With a nod and still the deep stare into his eyes, he began to pick up pace to a more relentless one, pumping his cock into you, setting a pace that was rough, yet not animalistic.

The pressure in your abdomen continued to boil, the speed of his thrusts being exactly what you needed. The desperation in your moans and whines built themselves up, your legs squirming more and more, causing Arthur to grip your body painfully now to keep himself steady and to not crush your frame with his weight.

A hand that Arthur previously had on your breasts, moved down to your clit once more, rubbing the spot gently, yet rapid.

Your thighs began to shake, a hand of your own now shutting your own mouth, trying to keep yourself quiet from the amount of pleasure Arthur was giving to you.

“You’re okay.” Arthur groaned, a hint of desperation behind his voice, nipping at the skin on your calves as you continued to shake.

Loud cries escaped your mouth as his thumb rubbed the circles faster and faster. With a whine of his name your walls clenched around his cock, tightly wrapping it.

To allow you to come down from your high, Arthur stopped his thrusts, letting go of your legs to lean down to kiss your closed eyelids which were fluttering. “Ya alright?” He asked, doing his best to keep his movements as minimal as possible while being buried deep in you.

You nodded, smiling at him. “Want you to come inside me.”

Arthur smirked at you, moving his body in a way that allowed you to spread your legs only for you to wrap them around his core. The feeling of your legs tight against him caused him to go back to his relentless speed in a matter of seconds, eliminating the quiet moment you just had, filling the air again with the sound of skins slapping and your frantic cries.

“W-want you to fill me up.” You managed to say in between your euphoria, and that was all that Arthur needed to convince him.

With a couple more bruising thrusts he buried himself to a halt, emptying himself in hot intervals into you, groaning loudly. Arthur lazily leaned his forehead to yours, smiling at you with his eyes closed. “Jesus.”

“Not quite.” You giggled, making him roll his eyes at your comment. When he tried to remove himself, you shut your legs tighter around him, silently asking him to stay buried in you for only a little bit longer.

Arthur wrapped his arms around you, puling you closer to him, lingering kisses all over your face.

You brushed your nose against his when he travelled his lips from one side to another, forcing a bigger smile from him.

- 🍯

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #paint away #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x female reader #arthur morgan fluff #arthur morgan smut #arthur morgan x you

[sjsmith56]

The Rules

Summary: One shot AU. A mobster’s daughter meets the love of her life but The Rules get in the way of it developing into something more.

Length: 6.5 K

Characters: James “Bucky” Barnes (at age 21, then 25), OFC (named), OFC’s parents (named), Brock Rumlow, John Walker, Loki Laufeyson.

Warnings: some cursing, rude behaviour and reference to mob life. Otherwise fluffy.

Author notes: This is my first attempt at writing a mob-themed story. Bucky is actually a sweetheart.

〰️ 〰️ 〰️

The first time Tia fell in love was when she was almost 18.  His name was James, 21, and he was one of newest men on her father's staff.  The first time Tia fell out of love was two weeks later when she saw James kissing a woman staff member and allowing himself to be pulled into her room at the mansion where they all lived.  This is their story.

Almost Eighteen

There were rules growing up in the house of a mob boss, particularly the man known as the Boss of Brooklyn, Jerome Brancato.  Rule #1, If the door to his office was open, anyone could come in.  If the door was closed, everyone had to stay out.  Rule #2, Daughters of the boss were off-limits.  Period.  No exceptions, unless the boss approved of the relationship which sometimes happened if he was approached correctly and with respect.  Rule #3, No meant no.  Other rules came up but the big three were supposed to be obeyed by everyone, staff and family.

Tia, seeing the door to her father's office was open approached it, hearing him speaking with another man.  The man, who said a lot of "Yes sirs" and "No sirs" seemed to be interviewing for a position with her father's "business," a business he took over from his father, and his father before him.  But Tia's father, Jerome, had no sons to leave the business to and daughters weren't supposed to be in that position, at least not in his narrow world view.

She pushed the door open, catching the attention of her father and the man, who rose to his feet and turned towards her.  He was tall, with short dark hair, and handsome, with eyes as blue as the sky.  Tearing her eyes away from him she looked at her father.

"I'm sorry, but your door was open," she said.  "I can come back."

"It was open," agreed her father.  "Tia, this is James Barnes.  He's here to join the security team.  Barnes, this is my youngest daughter, Tia.  She just graduated from high school."

He offered his hand, his white dress shirt peaking out from under his dark suit's sleeve.

"Pleasure," he said, in a voice that made a warmth pool deep inside her, his even white teeth showing in the smile he gave her.

Her voice squeaked a little when she answered.  "Thank you." 

Inside she groaned.  What kind of response was that?  James grinned a little.

"You're welcome."

"Why don't you give us half an hour to finish up," suggested her father.  "I still have to make James aware of the rules."

She smiled at her father but inside she felt her stomach drop.  The rules.  The fucking rules.  Rule #2, she was off-limits.  Apologetically, she returned to the door, risking one more look at the man she had just fallen in love with, then closed it and ran upstairs to her room to fall face first into her bed and cry over the rules.

It was a week before she saw James again.  James, Jimmy, Jamie, Jim ... all the variations of his name were written out on paper by her, as she signed her name with his.  Mr. and Mrs. James Barnes.  Jim and Tia Barnes.  Then she tore the pages up into tiny pieces and flushed them down the toilet because if there was one thing her already married older sisters warned her about was to not leave any trace of having a crush on any of their father's "staff," for that could cause all sorts of problems, not just for her but also for him.  In their father's line of work, that could result in serious issues for the male staff member but could also see her summarily married off to some business associate, which she didn't want.  Not at 17 years, 10 months and 2 weeks of age.  Besides, she was going off to college in a few months and the last thing she needed was a chaperone to make sure that Portia Isabel Brancato, nicknamed Tia, behaved herself.  So, she kept her face and attitude as neutral as possible, and tried to make it seem like she wasn't looking for James on the estate.  Which ended up being easy when she found out quickly that he was sent out to one of the satellite "offices," a warehouse at the docks to learn that aspect of the work. 

Resigned to not seeing him again for the foreseeable future, Tia came downstairs the one day to be driven to the salon for her usual mani / pedi appointment, only to see James waiting at the bottom of the stairs.  As she came down, he looked up and his smile lit her up inside once more.

"Good morning," he said, cheerily.  "I've been instructed to drive you to the Bronze Goddess salon.  Are you all ready?"

"I am, thank you," she replied politely, reaching the bottom step and looking up at him.  God, how could anyone be so good looking?  "Could we stop at a Starbucks for something?"

"I'm yours to command," he replied, then opened the front door for her, while somehow reaching the armoured Audi sedan first.

After making sure her seatbelt was in place, James closed the door and got behind the steering wheel.  Tia could see the coiled wire of the earpiece reaching down into his suit collar.  He checked in with his supervisor, likely Clint, then smoothly pulled out from the driveway towards the gate to the estate.

"I haven't seen you for a while," said Tia, tentatively.

"No, I've been elsewhere," he replied, pausing at the road and looking both ways before turning left, following the map on his dash display.

Five minutes later he pulled into the line at Starbucks, then looked at Tia in the rearview mirror.

"A white chocolate mocha Frappuccino, please," said Tia, handing him a Starbucks card.  "Get something for yourself while you're waiting for me."

"Thank you, I will," he said. 

He ordered a Caffé Americano, then offered them the card when they handed him the cups.  Turning around he smiled as he gave her the Frappuccino, then the card.  Ten minutes later he pulled up at the salon, then got out to open her door.

"I'm going to park then I'll be inside," he said.  "Your father was very specific that someone be in view of you at all times."

"Is there trouble?" she asked, as it wasn't a usual thing for a salon visit.

"Nothing I can't handle," he said, giving her that lop-sided smile again.  "You let me do the worrying."

He came inside, carrying his coffee, walking in like he belonged, and settled himself on an empty chair near the pedicure station, but in a position where he could see the front door.  He picked up one of the gossip magazines and flipped slowly through it.  Every person who walked into the salon underwent his scrutiny.  Everyone who came close to Tia, received even more attention.  When she was finished, he waited behind her while she paid, then took her gently by the elbow, leading her to where the car was parked, seemingly staying acutely aware of their environment.  On the drive back home, he looked at her several times in the rearview mirror.

"You planning to go to college?" he asked.

"Yeah, I've been accepted to Stanford, UCLA and Arizona State.  I wanted to apply to something in the east, but Dad thought it was safer for me to be further away."

She didn't add the qualifier "from his business interests."  There was kind of an unwritten rule that daughters were off-limits to action from his competitors but being on the other side of the country made that easier to follow.

"Did you go to college?"

He shook his head.  "I joined the army right out of high school.  Did one tour and realized I wasn't cut out for it.  My dad knew your dad from some construction work he did for him and put in a word for me."

The gate opened and James drove up the circular driveway to the front of the house.  Then he opened the door and offered Tia his hand to get out of the back.  At that moment, her father came out and called to her.  She smiled at James, then hurried to her father.  That was the last she saw of him until the next week when she went out to the opera with her father and mother.  Clint and Thor drove them.  After they entered the house, Tia started up the stairs to the bedrooms.  Hearing a sound, she looked up towards the third floor, where the staff bedrooms were and saw James kissing Sharon, her mother's social secretary.  Then Sharon pulled him into her bedroom, and the door closed behind them, the sound of the latch coinciding with the feeling of Tia's heart breaking.  Her mother, Liliana, who had also seen it, patted her daughter on the back.

"He asked for permission to take you out but your father said no, that you were too young," she offered.  "He told James to keep his attention elsewhere.  I'm sorry."

Rule #2 and 3, a double whammy.  With a sigh, Tia went to her bedroom and cried for an hour.  It would be four years before she saw James again.

〰️ 〰️ 〰️

Almost Twenty-Two

Rule #4, If your father arranged your marriage the correct response was "Yes sir, thank you sir, for finding me a good husband," even if the last part wasn't always true.

There were several gatherings at the Brancato estate that May, after Tia graduated from college.  Several different families who were in the same type of business as her father were invited to attend.  More specifically, if the families had an unmarried son, anywhere between the ages of 21 and 40, they were invited.  Gradually, over the month, the list of prospects was whittled down, until her parents hosted a dinner with the final four.  

Tia was officially on the market, being dangled like a carrot in order to accomplish any one of the following objectives:  settle a feud with a rival family, cement a business relationship between two families, provide a son-in-law able to take over the business from her father (because a woman couldn't do the job), satisfy a desire for grandchildren, specifically grandsons, just because that's what was expected of the daughters of a mob boss without a male heir, or a combination of several or all of the above.  What Tia wanted in a husband was supposedly considered but its importance was so far down that she knew the decision was likely already made before the dinner even started.

Did it rankle Tia?  Yes, but she had grown up as the privileged child of a wealthy and influential man.  Now was the time where she had to satisfy the needs of his business empire, more than the needs of her heart.  There was always a possibility that whoever won the "lottery" and satisfied her father's demands prior to approving the engagement would be a decent guy, one that she could grow to respect, if not love with all of her heart.  Her two sisters had done alright.  There was no reason to expect that she would end up with a creep, or someone who took the concept of marriage at its most basic, regarding her as property.  Then she met the final prospects.

Prospect #1 (not arranged in order of preference) – Brock Rumlow, an almost 40 something, twice-divorced, son of a boorish man who ran the docks.  Swarthy in appearance, with atrocious manners, and an almost permanent sneer.  No thank you.  Prospect #2 – John Walker, corrupt lawyer.  Certainly, he was handsome enough, if you liked that blonde, all-American quarterback look.  Smug, arrogant, and totally unaware that he rubbed people the wrong way.  Nope.  Prospect #3 – Loki Laufeyson.  Charming on the surface and although attractive in a European kind of way, Tia wasn't sure that he wasn't bisexual which could mean he wouldn't be demanding on her.  Certainly, he seemed to watch attractive men as much as he watched attractive women.  A supposed financial wizard, she got the feeling that her father would have to settle a significant amount on him to generate an engagement offer.  Prospect #4 – She blinked her eyes twice when she saw James enter with his father, George.  He was a prospective husband?  Yes, he had been at the other gatherings, but she assumed he was there as security.  He was staff and there hadn't been a marriage between a daughter and a staff member since... well, years.  Plus, he had broken her heart when she was 17 by going to bed with Sharon, the social secretary.  She left the job while Tia was in college, her replacement, an older woman who wore sensible shoes.

Dinner was called and Tia's father offered her his arm, escorting her to the table, where she sat to his left, while her mother sat to his right.  The prospects fathers were placed next, two on each side of the table, then their sons furthest away so that Jerome Brancato could observe them from a distance and see how they responded being grouped together.  At the foot of the table was her grandmother, the family matriarch, Maria Brancato.  She would be assessing the prospects up close, engaging them directly.

Right away the fathers, except for George Barnes, talked over each other about their sons, extolling their strengths, although only one of them said anything about how their progeny would be good for Tia.  That was George, when he did speak, who brought up the fact that James had several sisters and had always looked upon himself as their unofficial bodyguard, even though he was younger than them.

"No one even stepped up to the door to take one of my daughters out unless Bucky (he had a nickname?) approved of them first," said George.  "He kept the boys in line and made sure they were respectful of the girls and their mother; God rest her soul."

Tia's mother smiled.  "Winnie was a good woman.  She would be proud of the man James became."

Jerome gave Liliana a look, that saw her smile at her daughter, then keep eating. 

"Well, Brock would have done the same," said his father.  "Anyone who stepped out of line would see the business end of his fist.  He doesn't put up with any opposition from anyone."

That raised her father's eyebrows a little as he rarely used physical force against any of his men, and often welcomed an opposing view if it was presented properly, with respect.  Brock's father just kept rambling on about how no one intimidated his son.  Then John Walker, Sr. cleared his throat and told a story of how his son completed a complex business deal by finding dirt on one of the principals.  After setting up a honey pot situation, he managed to present the man with compromising pictures in order to sway him to their terms. 

"Made his client an extra $10 million."  He chewed with his mouth open.  "That alone was enough for his boss to offer him a partnership in the law firm.  Jumped right over several others who had been there longer.  Johnny will do what is needed to increase profits and productivity."

Her father said nothing, but Tia could tell he didn't like hearing the other man brag about it.  Yes, there were times when he employed similar tactics in dealing with certain people, but he kept his involvement in it to a minimum, as it was tempting fate to have the acts traceable back to him.  That was just asking for trouble and a careful leader kept things looking legal. 

At that moment, Tia noticed her mother looking down at the other end of the table, where her grandmother was.  There was a look between the two women that seemed to be sending an invisible message between them.  She just wished she knew what that look meant.

"Well, Loki has certainly done his share of cooking the books to improve profits and productivity," said Mr. Odinson, his stepfather.  "The magic he can perform on the balance sheet would make your head swim.  Every investigation against him has turned up nothing that can be pinned on him.  Takes a genius to do that."

"Hmmm," was all her father said to that.

"One of these days his luck will run out," she thought, wondering if her father was thinking the same thing.

The rest of the meal progressed in a similar manner until dessert was served.  Then Jerome finished his cake and coffee before he stood up, prompting the fathers then their sons to do the same.

"Gentlemen, let's go for brandy and cigars out by the pool, while my mother, wife and daughter confer," he stated. 

All of them pulled away, then James offered his hand to Tia's grandmother.

"I have enjoyed our talk this evening, Mrs. Brancato," he said, warmly.  "You've given me much to think about."

She smiled at him, then looked at her daughter, knowingly.  George Barnes saw the look then faced Liliana, offering his hand to her.

"My compliments to your cook.  That was a very enjoyable meal."

The three of them were left alone as the men filed out, and the two older women both looked at Tia.

"If it was us choosing, it would be James," said her mother, "but your father has other considerations, and his word is binding.  You will be able to go on a date with each of them in turn then provide your opinion to your father but I'm guessing he already made his mind up."

An hour later the evening was over, and they said good night to everyone.  James left with his father, being assigned to work in the warehouses that week.  He was staying at his parent's house during that time. 

〰️ 〰️ 〰️

The Dates

Rule #5, No sex on the first date.  Once an engagement was announced the couple could go at it but until that moment, any prospective husband of the boss's daughter who presumed to touch her in an intimate manner would deserve what happened to him later.

Two days later Loki Laufeyson arrived to take Tia to dinner.  He pulled up driving a Maserati, wearing an expensive silk suit.  He was polite, solicitous, and the perfect gentleman.  The restaurant was perfect also, a two-star Michelin restaurant, whose portions were so precious that Tia almost asked if they could stop at a drive thru for some burgers.  During the meal an older blond man stopped by the table to say hello, looking at Tia nervously.

"Mobius, this is Tia," said Loki.  "She's ... um ... my date."

"Oh."  The other man smiled slightly.  "Pleasure to meet you."  He looked back at Loki.  "I missed you at the club on Friday night."

"Yes, there was a dinner party at Tia's parent's house.  I was obligated to be there."

Both men looked very uncomfortable, so Tia did something kind to both of them and excused herself to go to the ladies' room.  Loki stood up as she left.  When she looked back, she could see both men speaking in whispers to each other and sighed.  Definitely bisexual with a preference for men.  Scratch Loki, which was too bad because he seemed quite nice.  In fact, later, after she returned to the table, he announced that he would be withdrawing his courtship of her but wished her the best.  They parted with a handshake.

Date #2 happened two days later when John Walker picked her up, driving a Mercedes SUV.  His suit, also silk, didn't look as good on him as Loki's did.  She attributed it to the fact that Walker was not used to working in a jacket.  It always seemed to ride up and crowd his neck.  They went to a restaurant, a steak house type, where he ordered a larger cut for him with all the trimmings and for her, a small cut, with a salad and minimal dressing.

"I'm sure you're always watching your weight," he said, eyeing her body.  "You seem to keep quite trim, and I wouldn't want you to think I don't support that."

As she guessed, he played football in college, at the quarterback position, and proceeded to regale her with his exploits on the field.  He didn't ask one question about her.  When he kissed her goodnight, he attempted to give her tongue, but she successfully pulled away, waggling her finger at him, as if he should know better.  Since a servant was already on the step, he took it with a smile, but she saw a darkness in his eyes that bothered her.

Date #3 was with James.  He picked her up in a 1994 Mustang GT, wearing a sports coat over an open necked blue shirt and jeans.  Somehow, he had told her mother his plans, so Tia also wore jeans and brought a sweater.  They talked as he drove to Coney Island. 

"This is your car?" she asked.

"Yup, restored her myself," he said.  "Found her up on some blocks in an abandoned lot.  No tires, stripped of parts but the body was good, and it kept me out of trouble when I was in high school and after the army.  It was time spent with my dad.  I've been offered good money for her, but I like driving her.  Sorry, to talk about her as if she's real but I know every inch of her."

"I like her, too," smiled Tia.  "Does she have a name?"

"Yes, but I can't tell you."  He blushed.  "It would kind of be inappropriate for our first date."

They drove a bit further then Tia looked at him again.

"Can I ask you something personal?"

"Go ahead, I have no secrets," he answered.

"My mother told me when I was 17 that you asked for permission to take me out, but my father said no."  She looked out her window.  "I saw you a week later kissing Sharon, then going into her bedroom."

He nodded his head, his mouth set in a grim line.  "Yeah.  Your father told me that you were too young and to set my sights lower.  She flirted with me, and we did kiss.  I didn't stay.  She wanted more from me that night than I was prepared to give.  I'm no saint and I have been with several women since then, but nothing serious."  He took a deep breath.  "I always liked you more.  It's why I asked to be considered as a suitor.  This time, your father agreed to let me have a chance."

"Oh." Tia swallowed and took a deep breath, trying to calm the pounding of her heart.  "What are your chances?"

He smiled a little sadly.  "Not as good as the other three," he admitted.  "My father is a construction foreman who did some work for your father, and they got along well, considering each other a friend.  But he's not well off like the other fathers, nor is he in any position of influence.  My only assets are my loyalty to your father, I'm a hard worker and like to think I do the job without letting my emotions get the better of me.  Most of all, I pledged to be faithful to you always and to treat you with kindness and respect.  I have sisters and expected the same from the men they all married."

Tia watched the beams of the streetlights come through the windows alternating between illuminating his face and leaving it in darkness.  His strong facial features had matured in the few years since she went away to college, as had his physique.  There was also a depth to him that the others didn't have.  The fact that he didn't talk much about himself impressed her.  This was a man looking for a serious relationship, not a business deal sealed with the acquisition of a wife. 

The date was fun as they went on the rides, ate hot dogs and drank beer.  He won her a large stuffed giraffe at the shooting gallery, christening it together as Walter.  When they walked back to where the car was parked and deposited Walter in the back seat, James looked at her in the dimly lit area.  Gently, he took one of her hands in his, then raised it to his lips, kissing the knuckles then turning it to kiss her wrist.

"I expect someone to be watching when I drop you off so if you don't mind a kiss here."

He didn't finish what he was saying as Tia raised herself up to kiss him, wrapping her arms around his neck.  He enclosed her in his arms, and she felt the firmness of his body pressed against hers.  His soft lips were perfect, applying just the right amount of pressure against hers, then she opened hers to allow their tongues to mingle.  It was every bit as good as she imagined when she was 17, going on 18.  When they finally pulled apart, he looked at her in a way that no man had ever looked at her before. 

"You don't know how long I've wanted to kiss you," he murmured, his eyes taking in every part of her face.  "You don't remember the first time we saw each other, do you?"

"I thought it was in my dad's office."

He shook his head, smiling.  "My dad built your pool house.  I was 16 and worked as a helper on the site.  You were still a girl, just turned 13 but I thought that you would be beautiful when you grew up a little.  I knew then that I didn't really want to look at anyone else.  Sounds a little creepy but I was willing to wait until we were both ready."

"It's not creepy," said Tia.  "We were both kids.  I'm glad you waited."  She looked down for a moment.  "Are you sure this is the life you want?  I know what my father is and the things that you've likely already done for him."

"I went into a combat zone when I was 18 so I have killed before," he said.  "So far, your dad has kept me out of that part of it.  I think he's looking to scale back that side of his business, be more legitimate.  If it means that you and I can be together, it will be worth it."

"Okay.  One more question.  Your nickname is Bucky?"

He laughed, giving her that lop-sided smile.  "Yeah, it's from my middle name, Buchanan.  That was my mother's surname."  He shrugged.  "James sounds more grownup and mature.  You can call me anything you want."

"Just the best date I've ever had," she smiled back.

They kissed again, then James opened the passenger door for her and drove her back to the estate.  Before they got out, he gave her his cell phone number, entered it as Jane so her father wouldn't know it was his, then told her to call him anytime if she needed help.  In front of the mansion, he was aware they were being watched so he gave Tia a respectful hug, handed Walter to her, then waited as she entered the house, before getting back into his car and driving to his father's house.  Although he hoped it would be enough for her father to choose him, he knew his chances weren't good.

The final date, with Brock Rumlow, was everything that Tia feared.  He showed up in a heavily customized truck that Tia needed a ladder to enter.  Although dressed in a suit he didn't wear a tie until forced to at the restaurant he took her to, after verbally haranguing the maître d’ for the indignity of his money not being good enough for the place.  His table manners were as atrocious as his regular manners, talking while chewing, burping at the table, and referring to his bathroom habits in crude terms.  Excusing herself to the ladies' room, Tia texted James.

Tia: Help! I'm stuck with a Cro-Magnon man who's unbearable.

Jane: Brock?  Yeah, he's a bit full of himself, isn't he?  Do you need rescuing?

Tia: Possibly.  I'll keep you posted.

She returned to the table where Brock was sprawled in his chair.  Tia's plate was gone as was his. 

"Good, you're back," he said.  "I've paid the bill.  Let's go to a club."

"I wasn't finished."  He looked up at her surprised.

"Oh, I assumed you went to the bathroom to uh ... you know, bring it all up.  That's what you chicks do to keep slim, right?  My exes did that all the time."

She would have answered but he stood up and headed for the door, turning around to wait impatiently for her.  With a sigh, she joined him, waiting as he tossed the valet his token.  The truck appeared and he didn't help her in, although the valet did, giving her a sympathetic eye roll.  The club, with a pounding bass that bled out onto the street was full of friends of his, whose method of communication seemed to be either a jut of their chin or a pound hug.  He requested bottle service in the VIP area, then flopped down on the couch, pulling her down with him, and draping his arm over her shoulder.  Sitting there like the king of his own kingdom, Tia had a vision of her life with Brock Rumlow and decided to end the date there.  Of course, he didn't want to and kept trying to keep her sitting on the couch with him.  Finally, she convinced him that she needed to throw up and he let her go.  Exiting out of an emergency door she went to the nearest coffee shop that was open and called James, who told her to stay there and wait for him.  He arrived twenty minutes later, entering the coffee shop with a worried look on his face.  As they hugged, he stroked her hair and vowed that no matter what, Brock Rumlow wouldn't do this to Tia ever again.

At the mansion, when he pulled up, Brock was there, waiting angrily for Tia, as was her father and mother.  He went to open the door for Tia, then growled when he found it locked.  James came out of the driver's side door and placed himself in front of Brock, staring at him in a way that showed he had absolutely no fear of him.

"Move," said the jilted date.

"No, move yourself," replied James.  "She called me to get her out of a bad date and I obliged.  Now, I'm going to finish the job and make sure she gets inside the house safely."

"Are you saying I abused her?"

"I'm saying you wouldn't let her leave until she thought she was going to be sick.  She told me you acted like a pig the entire time."

"She's lying.  The little bitch is lying."

Jerome pulled Brock away at that moment.  "What did you call my daughter?"

Liliana slapped Brock in the face.  "How dare you.  Jerome, if you even consider him suitable for Tia, I'll leave you.  I swear, I will divorce your ass and take everything you own.  It's all in my name anyway."

"No one's divorcing anyone," said Jerome, then he looked at Brock.  "You have 10 seconds to get your ass in your monstrosity of a truck and get the hell off our property.  You tell your father that if he even tries to retaliate it will be war between us.  Now get."

Rule #6, Even a mob boss with only daughters does not take kindly to his daughters being referred to as bitches.  Especially by a twice-divorced asshole like Brock Rumlow.

〰️〰️〰️

The Wedding, six months later

Rule #7, When marrying into the mob, let her family have their way.  It's easier and lulls them into thinking you'll be a pushover. 

This was it.  Her father made the decision and now Tia had to live with it.  She looked at herself in the mirror as her mother fastened the veil to her head.  A knock on the door was opened by her oldest sister, acting as matron of honour.  Her father walked in; his bow tie undone.

"Lil, can you fix this?" he asked.  Then he stopped, seeing Tia's reflection in the mirror.  "All my girls looked so beautiful on their wedding day."

"Men always have trouble with a bow tie," she smiled, turning towards him.  "Come to the window so I have better light."

While her mother did her father's tie, Tia's phone, deep inside the pocket of her wedding dress (that she insisted on having) vibrated and she went to the bathroom to answer it, telling everyone she needed some water.

Jane:  You sure you're going to do this?

Tia:  Yes, it's what my dad wants.  I'm a good mob daughter, you know.

Jane:  Yeah, now you'll be a good mob wife.

Tia:  If you mean pregnant on the wedding night, chances are good.

Jane:  LOL.  I hope you'll be happy.

Tia:  Thanks to you, I know I will be.  You'll be there, right?

Jane:  Wouldn't miss it.  I'll always have your back.

She smiled at that and put the phone away, then poured herself some water.  When she came out, her dad's tie was perfect, and her mother was standing there with the bouquet of flowers.  Grandma Maria beamed at her.  The wedding planner fussed over her while the photographer took some photos of them all, including her six bridesmaids, well matrons as most of them were married.  On the limousine over she thought of all her worries about the man her father would finally approve of.  It was easier after Loki willingly took himself out of contention, then Brock showed himself to be a total asshole in front of her parents.  She could live with the man who was chosen and make it work.

At the church, there were all sorts of photographers, some of them likely FBI plants as her father was still a person of interest, as were many of the guests.  But he did promise Tia that he intended to bow out of that type of work and build up the legitimate areas, without even using laundered money.  After all, he wanted his youngest daughter to be happy. 

The walk up the steps of the church was interrupted by calls of the photographers to pose but she only slowed down, anxious to get this part of her life over with and begin her life as a wife, then mother.  At the top of the stone steps, she looked back towards the street and saw James' Mustang, smiling that it was there.  She stepped inside and the wedding planner took over, positioning the flower girls (a niece from each side), then the bridesmaids / matrons, a combination of one girlfriend, her sisters and his sisters, sending them down the aisle.  One of her brothers-in-law escorted her mother to her pew.  She had wanted them both to walk her down the aisle, but her father put his foot down; traditionally only the father could give the bride away.  Then everyone stood up and she knew her moment had come. 

Her groom came out from the vestry, but she couldn't see him over the number of people who blocked her view.  Then Tia took her father's arm and began the walk towards the altar.  It wasn't until she was three quarters of the way down that she finally saw James, in his black tuxedo, white shirt, and black tie, with a boutonnière in his lapel.  He gazed at her with glassy eyes, then offered his hand to her when she was close.  Her father kissed her cheek, then kissed James' before lightly slapping him on the cheek to get his attention.

"You do right by her," he murmured.

"Yes sir, that's my plan."

Finally, it was just them, in front of the priest, and he began the service asking if there was anyone who objected to this couple marrying.  You could have heard a pin drop in the silence, then he smiled at them and began the service.

Rule #8, No excessive tongue in a Catholic wedding ceremony.  It's not classy and even though the people in the church for a mob wedding might be considered criminals they aren't animals.

The kiss before they walked down the aisle as husband and wife was just as good as the kiss at Coney Island.  They could both hear the sighs of delight from the women who were present thrilled at the absolutely perfect husband that Tia Brancato, now Tia Barnes had.  When they exited the church, having rice thrown at them, because that was traditional, James opened the front door of his 1994 Mustang GT and tucked Tia's dress into the front seat around her legs.  Then he went around to the driver's side, got in, and started it up, revving it a few times before he peeled away, with the sounds of tin cans rattling behind him.  On the back window the Just Married that was drawn on with washable paint soon faded away from view.  The limousine driver opened the door for the parents and the bridal party.  They would meet James and Tia at Prospect Park for the photos. 

In the Mustang, Tia looked at her handsome husband, James.

"You came," she said.  "You brought Portia."  She gestured to the car.

"I promised," he replied.  "Said I would always have your back."  He drove for another minute.  "Did you mean it, about getting pregnant?"

"I'm off the pill and I might be ovulating," she said.  "If it happens, it happens.  I'll be happy either way."

"Are you okay that we're waiting until tonight?" 

He glanced at her.  It was something he suggested once her father announced that James could propose to Tia.

"If it's anything like our first kiss I won't be disappointed."  She placed her hand on his.  "Besides, there's always Rules #9 and 10."  He laughed, having been briefed on the other rules already, especially the ones that were her rules.  "Rule #9, No matter what, we'll make it work."

"And Rule #10?"

"Whatever will be will be.  You knew when you first saw me when I was a kid that you liked me.  I knew when I first saw you in my dad's office that I wanted you.  It was meant to be."

"I love the Rules."  He raised her hand to his lips and kissed the knuckle.  "I love you."

That evening, their first dance was to Que Sera Sera, otherwise known as Whatever Will Be, Will Be.  It always was Tia's favourite rule.

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#bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #buckybarnes original female character #bucky barnes au #james buchanan barnes au #bucky barnes oneshot #mobster #mob daughter

[cadotoast]

Chapter 3- And So it Begins

Word count: 3.8k

Minors DNI

The living quarters that have been given to you is almost too much to take in. Much nicer than the small little room in the cottage you and your father share, your place in the guest quarters of the palace is opulent and fine.

Rich-colored quilts and blankets adorn the four-poster bed that dominates the room, the royal blue curtains matching the drapes at the windows, and the soft rug on the floor. The room itself is almost as large as your whole cottage, with the Garderobe attached adding even more living area.

"Does this meet your needs, my lady?" You turn around from your gawking at the room to address the man behind you. Ser John, along with the other members of the King’s Men, had been given special orders today to escort the arriving prospects to their rooms. Which means that upon your hesitant arrival to the palace, the dashing knight took your trembling hand into the crook of his elbow, and led you to your room.

"It's... A lot." You say with a smile. "I am not used to such finery." You're painfully aware of the drab nature of your dress, though it's one of your best. "It's wonderful though. I can see myself being very comfortable here. Thank you for escorting me, Ser John."

You watch as the knight stoops into a low bow, one hand at his chest. "It is my honor. There will always be a guard outside your door, so if you have any need, just speak with him. All of the palace guards are good men, and will not hesitate to help you." He straightens, glancing to your face.

You try in earnest to wipe the nervous uncertainty from your features, but the way Ser John's eyes soften, you can tell you're unsuccessful.

"The prince is a good man." He says, voice soft. "As his personal guard, I spend a lot of time with him. He has things to learn, as do all young folk, but his heart is good. He will treat you well, should you win his hand."

"Thank you for the encouragement, Ser." Your voice is soft. "I would be a liar if I said that I am not anxious for this." The silence that falls is contemplative, and you sigh, fixing your gaze on one of the lamps mounted on the wall. "Common born girls are not meant to live in places."

"Common born you may be, but you have a gentle spirit." Ser John counters. "And in the eyes of many, the heart of a woman is more valuable than her lineage." Another bow to you, and then he straightens and turns for the door. "I must take my leave now. Rest well, Lady."

And then he is gone.

Pursing your lips, you turn to gaze out the window, at the sun setting in the distance. Dinner will be announced soon, and all of the ladies in attendance will be expected to arrive on time, in appropriate dress.

Dress... the thought makes your stomach turn, and you twist hesitantly to gaze at the door that leads to the wardrobe.

Several weeks ago, mere days after the announcement of the selection, a royal seamstress had shown up at your door to take your measurements. When you had asked why, she merely stated that prospects for the prince must be dressed accordingly. You had tried to decline, saying that you had no money for fine things like robes and gowns, but the seamstress had cut you off, stating merely that all expenses for the time you will be at the palace will be covered by the royal treasury.

You open the door to the wardrobe, gasping at the arrangement of clothing you find there. Finery of all sorts, fit for a queen. Riding robes, sweeping gowns, sleepwear of silk and velvet. What a waste... You think of all the people in the village who simply struggle to make it day to day. And here you are with a new wardrobe, and a purse of gold on your side table, an allowance courtesy of the crown if you desired anything not currently provided.

A knock at the door draws your attention from the opulence as three handmaidens enter the room. "Hello lady," one of them announces. "We are here to assist you in getting ready for dinner."

You don't bother protesting as they go about getting you ready. A bath is drawn with warm water, and they scrub you clean, your cheeks burning at being unclothed in front of them. They brush out your hair and towel you dry, settling you down in front of a vanity, in a silk robe, while they paint your face and pin your tresses up in a fashionable style. You glance around the room from your spot at the vanity, having little else to do while they keep you still on the padded bench.

The walls are smooth grey stone, adorned with oil lamps and tapestries. All of the furniture is of a dark, cherry-colored wood, which is complimented by the room's blue color theme. A small bookshelf is even provided, with reading materials, and baskets of fabric, yarn, parchment, quills and ink. The selection process is expected to take several months at the very least, and when you're not entertaining the prince or socializing, you will need something to keep yourself busy.

I wonder if the kitchens will let me do any baking... You muse to yourself as rouge is added to your cheeks and coal to your eyelids. The woman that gazes back at you in the mirror is still you, but an accentuated version. Her curves are swathed in a pale violet gown, a tight corset adorning her waist and bust. Glittering jewels dangle from her wrists and neck, accentuating the colors of her eyes. You watch as she gazes back at you, a regal picture, if not a bit wan.

The handmaids, you learn, are the ones who will be assigned to you during your stay. They introduce themselves as Emma, Colette, and Avice. They are all slightly older than you, and all married, you find out. Emma has a young son that her mother helps take care of while Emma herself is working at the palace. Emma is fair-skinned with bright red hair that is tucked into a bonnet. Colette's skin is a honey color, with her dark hair braided down her back. Avice's chestnut hair is cropped short, almost like a boy's, but playful eyes dance as she shapes your hair with skilled, olive-toned hands.

"Well now you look right as rain!" Avice exclaims, grinning. "All that's left is some lip paint and some scent behind the ears and on the wrists and you'll be ready!"

You resist the urge to lick your lips at the foreign sensation, and the scent of lilac and rose tickles your nose, but once you are on your feet, slipping on a matching pair of slippers, you can't deny that you make an ethereal picture.

"You're going to steal his breath away," Emma says, grinning. "Maybe he will give you the place of honor at the first dinner by his side!"

"Oh I hope not," you fret, twisting a silver ring that adorns your middle finger. "I don't think I would like having so many eyes on me for the first day."

"It will happen eventually, Lady," Colette's the one to speak this time. "His highness will be expected to spend personal time with each prospect in the view of his lords and ladies, to vague her worth as a member of his court and family."

"Eventually, yes." You agree, nodding your head. "But hopefully not tonight."

The handmaids guide you outside of your room, and you gaze down the hallway where a few of the other women who have been selected are emerging from their own quarters. There are four other rooms within your line of sight, the others must be elsewhere in the guest wing.

Your guard acts as your escort, leading you from your rooms and away from where your handmaidens will certainly be preparing your bed for sleep later this evening. The guard extends his arm to you, and just like with Ser John, you place your hand in the crook of his elbow and allow yourself to be led through the palace.

The foyer leading into the great hall is filled with warm torchlight and cheerful chatter. You can hear the sounds of lords and ladies of the palace settling at the tables provided.

The prospects for the prince filter in one by one. Thankfully, Jenny is one of the first to arrive, wearing a splendid wine-colored gown. She gives you a nervous smile, moving to your side as she looks you over.

"That color is pretty on you," she remarks.

"As does that color for you." You reply. "I think that the seamstresses picked out styles and colors that are supposed to be flattering to each of us, make all of us the most... appealing."

Jenny makes a face, and you can't help but giggle.

You both settle near the wall, watching as the other prospects enter the foyer.

Ami Orund is the next to arrive, an ebony-skinned lady with curly black hair. Her satin gown is of bright yellow, which enunciates her sunny personality. She gives you and Jenny a bright smile and a curtsy when she sees you both.

Joan Bavant is a mouse of a girl, small and slim. Even her face is a little pointed. Her long, fawn-colored hair is curled in ringlets and piled in a crown on her head. She wears an ivory dress layered with tulle.

Ysoria Rainecourt is paler than what seems natural, with dark brown hair and eyes that are almost black. She wears a black gown that clings to her generous figure.

Natalie Perry is a rather plain looking girl, on the plump side. But her olive skin and bright grey eyes seem to glow, and she carries herself with a grace that you envy. Her gown is of a fabric that makes her appear as if she has been deluged in quicksilver.

Sabine Vauville looks as if she could be a knight herself, tall and broad, with a stern face. Her face looks as if it is a bit squashed, but she carries with her an air of authority that makes you shiver slightly. Her cherry-red gown flows out at her hips, turning her would-be awkward height into elegance.

Lydia Gueron is swathed in a pink dress that brings out the blue of her eyes and the pale straw color of her hair. She seems on the shyer side, hiding in the shadows.

Floretia Eveque wears a sky-blue dress that stands in contrast to her brown skin. Her eyes are a startling shade of green.

Cyrila Tirel, the last to arrive, wears an emerald dress that sweeps the floor and compliments her honeyed skin and hazel eyes perfectly.

"Ladies! Your attention, please." The steward calls for attention, and you and the gathered women turn towards the noise. "You will each be introduced one at a time. Please enter when your name is called, curtsy to the prince, and then take your place at the table at the right, you will see your name on a place card. Once all of you are introduced and seated, the meal will begin."

There's a murmuring among the girls, and you and Jenny share an anxious look.

One by one, each girl is called into the great hall. You grimace at Jenny as your name is called before hers, and you gather your skirts in one hand as you enter the hall, a pink blush rising to your cheeks.

Several of the girls are already seated, having already presented themselves. You're conscious of the gazes of the knights, the royals, and the guests invited to this feast. To the side, you see the knights you'd acquainted yourself with at the fair. Ser Kyle gives you a reassuring smile, and Ser John gives you a solemn nod. Ser MacTavish steals ser Simon's wine goblet and raises it in the air in a toast.

Facing the dais, you curtsy low, dipping your head reverently to the prince and his family. When you straighten, Prince Aldous gives you an approving nod, and you take that as your cue to find your seat. You find your name between the place cards of Sabine and Ami. With Jenny's card being directly in front of you. With a careful gathering of your skirts, you sit in the chair as gracefully as possible, given the weakness in your knees.

When your table partners are seated, you give them each a gentle smile, Jenny included. Natalie is the final lady to be presented, and at last all of you have been presented formally to the prince, his family, and their court.

The king raises a hand, and servants with arms full of food and pitchers of wine appear, seemingly out of nowhere. You give a gracious smile to the serving woman who fills your goblet, and to the squire who sets a large platter of toasted meats in front of you and your table mates. You watch as servants present the high table and the royals with the choicest of the foods on golden platters, curiously observing as the king chooses food for himself and his queen, and then after the prince has selected, the plate is passed to the other nobles and guests of honor along the dais.

"Have you ever seen something so succulent?" Jenny asks you across the table. A tender piece of fowl settles on her plate, and you grin at her as you watch her practically salivate.

"It certainly is fine food," you agree as you serve yourself some of the bird in front of you, as well as a few spoonfuls of gravy. "I only wish I could share this with my Da."

"You're not used to such food, are you?" Ami looks at you from the corner of her eye. A blush floods your cheeks, but you shake your head.

"Jenny and I are common born from the local village below the castle. It's often that we worry about when our next meal is going to come from."

"Our parents will hardly recognize us when we are so plump from all of this good food!" Jenny giggles, nibbling on a roll.

"I'm... surprised." To your diagonal, Lydia peers at you. "I wouldn't have expected Prince Aldous to select those he knew to be common born."

You recall Ser John's words from earlier.

"Perhaps the prince is concerned with more than Lineage," you take a bite of the savory meal marveling at the use of the spices. "It's possible he has different characteristics in mind for his bride."

Despite the disparity in social class between you and your neighbors, conversation flows easily, and you're pleased enough that none of them seem particularly malicious. A smidge of doubt lingers though, recalling that nobles and commoners alike can be two-faced when they are trying to get what they want

"As far as I can tell," Sabine gives you a shrewd look. "yourself and lady Jennifer here seem to be the only ones of us who didn't want to be selected." The statement carries a weighted implication.

You push your food around your plate as you carefully formulate an answer. "This certainly was not what I had in mind when I imagined my future."

"I'm not sure I want to marry for anything else other than love," Jenny adds with a small smile, "it's hard to believe I could love a stranger."

"Isn't the goal of this whole ordeal for us to fall in love with him, and to make him fall in love with us?" Lydia leans forward, sipping on her wine.

"I suppose," Jenny shrugs, the shoulders of her dress slipping slightly to reveal her collar bones. She fidgets with the fabric and pulls it back up into place. "I can't help but feel like some sort of breeding stock. A mare for a stallion."

Conversation begins to quiet as a minstrel enters the room, a lute in hand. You turn your attention to the entertainment as the minstrel begins to sing and dance, the crowd joining in with the local folk tunes. Looking around at the people around you, you're struck by how similar you all are. Despite class and rank and social status, you're all human. All can enjoy a minstrel's song.

~~

You sigh in relief as you slip your shoes off, your handmaids already at your elbows to assist you in disrobing. After a late evening of entertainment, speeches, formality, and superb food, you're nearly dead on your feet. And this whole debacle hasn't even truly begun.

"Tomorrow starts the courting process, exciting isn't it?" Emma hands you some silk bedclothes, which you slip into as Colette removes the pins from your hair. You marvel at the satiny feel on your skin.

"Exciting is one word for it," your voice sounds a little weary. Avice comes up to you with a wash rag and begins to wipe your face. "I'm out of my depth."

"I am sure you will do splendidly."

With an exhausted sigh, you settle into the bed. It's almost too soft, compared to your little straw mattress back home.

"I feel like I'm being swallowed," you admit with a rueful grin. Your handmaids chuckle, before curtsying to you and exiting the room.

All around you is dark, swathed with the glow of the oil lamp on your bedside table. The curtains are drawn against the night, shutters not being needed as this room has glass-paned windows. The soft light casts shadows along the stone walls, depicting imaginary monsters of bedtime stories told to you long ago.

A pang of lonning fills you. Homesickness. You can't recall a time you've not returned home to your little cottage to sleep in your room. You can't remember a time not being able to whisper a goodnight to your father, even as he lay sleeping in his chair by the cold hearth. He would always try to wait for you to come home from whichever tavern job you'd managed to snag. He wasn't always successful at staying awake. But you always kissed his forehead and told him goodnight.

Tears prick at your eyes, and you swallow the stinging lump filling your throat. With a sniffle, you roll over, letting your tears well over your lids and fall to the pillow below you.

~~

The morning dawns bright and clear, a shaft of sunlight pushing through the gap in the curtains falls across your bed. A soft rusling of fabric rouses you from your troubled slumber, and you blink blearily.

"Good morning, Lady," Colette smiles at you, her kind gaze taking in your swollen eyes and puffy face. "Breakfast is at the next bell, we are here to get you ready."

The first round of courting begins today.

You practice patience with your handmaids as the fuss over you, dressing you in a frilly, cornflower-blue gown fitting for the end of summer. You look radiant with the flowers that have been woven into your hair and secured with pins. The face paint applied is lighter than last night's, giving you a healthy glow without being overbearing.

To your pleasant surprise, Jonas is waiting for you when you exit your room. His hair is freshly cut, and he gives you a warm smile. "Good morning, sister mine." His gaze flits over your outfit. "Finery looks beautiful on you."

"I feel like a goose dressed for a feast," you joke, taking his arm.

"You look for for a prince," his hand squeezes yours gently. "As much as we jest about His Highness, he is a good man. If you were to choose each other, it would be a good match for you."

This surprises you, to say the least. "You're giving your blessing?"

"As much as I can, I suppose." Jonas' boots make a soft thudding noise on the carpeted stairs leading down to the foyer. "Passing on Da's blessing too. He wishes you well."

That pang of homesickness returns, and you sigh, moving a lock of hair out of your face. "It's only been a day, and I already miss him."

"It is quite a change, isn't it?" His hands are warm and reassuring. "But I have every confidence that you will do just splendidly."

Unlike dinner last night, breakfast is a less formal affair, with people trickling in the great hall little by little. No great announcements or speeches this morning, it seems. No place cards, either.

Longing for some familiarity, you settle yourself in the same seat you'd been in last night, using the moment to scan the hall.

Much less crowded than before, there are still the knights and the court, but most of the noble guests from last night are gone, in lieu of the less formal meal.

"This is a little nicer, isn't it?" Your perusing is interrupted by an unexpected voice.

"Your highness!" You nearly knock your chair to the floor in shock. Prince Aldous looks splendid in a tunic of jade, belted at the waist by a gold chain. He gives you a smile, even as you curtsy to him.

"I take it the lack of formalities is more to your taste," Prince Aldous continues. "Would you care to join me for breakfast?"

You blink, startled, but then dip your head in a nod. "It would be my honor."

You're grateful for his guiding hand up to the dais, as your knees tremble slightly. Jenny, who has just entered the hall, gapes at you, a delighted grin on her face.

Prince Aldous pulls out a chair for you, and you sit with a smile. "Thank you, Your Highness."

"Please, just call me Aldous." He settles next to you, giving you a wry smile. "Royal I may be, but all of the honorifics and protocol get grating after a while."

"I can only imagine." You nod a little. "Thank you for inviting me your--" you clear your throat. "Aldous."

"It's my pleasure. You look beautiful, by the way. The seamstress has done well with your clothes. I was jealous you couldn't sit with me last night."

"Already chosing favorites?" You can't help but giggle. "I'm sure you will say that to all of the girls."

Aldous doesn't get a chance to respond as servants arrive with platters of fruit, pitchers of juice, and bowls of hot oats with honey and nuts. He serves you from one of the platters set on the table, and you thank him with a smile.

Perhaps this won't be so bad after all.

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[lau219]

Won’t You Be My Neighbor?

Part 13

Previous part here

……………………………………………………………………………

​“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe since your dad’s home, he should just take you guys.”

​Looking at Henry, who was standing at her back door in his baseball uniform, Y/N tried not to let his crestfallen look affect her too much, but she wasn’t very successful.

​“But it’s a big game,” Henry replied. “You don’t want to come?”

​His expression and the disappointment in his voice was killing her, but as much as she wanted to be there for him, it was kind of uncharted territory now.

​“It’s not that I don’t want to come, but I don’t know if...well, it’s kinda hard to explain, honey,” Y/N said to him. “Why don’t you ask your dad if he’ll just take you? And then you guys can come back over here when the game’s over.”

​A sad frown on his face, Henry looked down and took a step back.

​“Ok,” he said, and then he turned around and walked back across the driveway.

​Man, that was painful. But now that things were different between her and Emmett, Y/N didn’t know how to navigate any of this. Only a couple weeks had gone by since they had officially started seeing each other, and there was still a lot to figure out.

​Several minutes later, she was still in her kitchen, sorting through her mail, when she heard her back door open again and heard someone ascending the steps. When she turned around, she was met with Emmett as he stood in the kitchen doorway.

​“Henry just told me you’re not coming,” he said to her. “Why not?”

​Swallowing nervously, Y/N looked back at him and shifted on her feet.

​“I don’t know if it’s such a good idea,” she replied to him. “I mean, I want to be there for him, but with you and me now, I just...I’m not sure it’s the right time. This is a big game for him, plus, it’s just...well, you know how people are.”

​“What do you mean?” Emmett asked her as he crossed his arms, but Y/N gave him a knowing look.

​“You know exactly what I mean,” she replied. “No one in this town can keep their mouth shut. As soon as people see us together, the questions and gossip are gonna be flying at us from all directions. The spotlight is gonna be on us for weeks.”

​His gaze softening, Emmett uncrossed his arms and walked over to her, stopping and then wrapping an arm around her waist. He knew she was right – they would be under the microscope for a while as everyone enjoyed the juicy new development that the two of them would be, but that’s how things were in a smaller town. Everyone knew everyone’s business, and nothing stayed secret for long.

​“They’re gonna find out eventually,” he said to her. “And I thought we agreed we aren’t keeping this a secret.”

​“We’re not,” Y/N replied as she shook her head, stroking Emmett’s arm, absentmindedly tracing the lines of his tattoo, “but this is a big game for Henry, and I want the attention on him, not us. And I’d prefer people find out gradually, rather than the whole town finding out all at once – everyone is going to be at this game.”

​Emmett understood how she felt. He wasn’t crazy about the idea of being bombarded with the attention that their relationship would bring, either, but as he saw it, better to just rip off the Band-Aid. They could tell people as much or as little as they chose to, and he honestly didn’t care what anyone thought. Although, he knew people would be nothing but happy for them.

​“Just admit it, you’re ashamed of me,” Emmett teased her, gently pinching her side.

​Y/N gave him a little smile.

​“You know that’s not true,” she replied as she grabbed his hand. “But people are gonna talk.”

​“Yeah,” Emmett nodded. “They’re gonna be asking how a sweet, beautiful woman like you could find anything she liked about a guy like me. And honestly, I’d love to hear your answer.”

​Y/N’s smile widened and she lifted her chin, leaning forward and giving him a quick peck.

​“Oh, shush,” she said with a smile against his lips, and he chased her mouth for a deeper kiss.

​“The sooner we let everyone see, then the sooner it’ll become old news,” Emmett said to her when their lips parted. “Plus, I wanna show off that I get to be with the most amazing woman around and make every other guy in this town jealous.”

​Still smiling, Y/N shook her head again and wrapped her arms under his, pulling him closer.

​“You do realize that just about every woman in this town is thirsting after you, right?” she said to him. “Even Betty,” she added with a smile, referring to their 90-year-old neighbor who he’d danced with at the block party.

​“As long as you’re the one who comes home with me, then I don’t care about anyone else,” Emmett replied. “The exception being that if Betty makes any further hints that she’s interested, then you’re back out on the street.”

​Y/N laughed again as Emmett smiled once more, and he loosened his grip on her.

​“Come on,” he said. “If nothing else, do it for Henry. He really wants you to be there.”

​Taking a deep breath and then slowly releasing it, Y/N finally agreed.

​“Ok,” she said with a nod of her head.

•.•.•.•.•

​30 minutes later, they were parking Emmett’s car in the dirt lot and the boys were bouncing around in the backseat, eager to get out. Max was excited to see his friends, and Henry was nervous about the game and wanted to join his teammates.

As the boys got out and collected their stuff, Y/N looked around the lot to see how many other people were nearby at the moment. As she suspected, it seemed like the entire town was at this game, seeing as a win for Henry’s team meant they would go on to the regional championship. After getting out of the car, she stayed pressed against the door as Emmett got out and came around to her side.

​“Come on,” he said to her gently, and he stretched out his hand to her.

​Taking a deep breath, Y/N looked down and grabbed his hand, and they began to walk together across the lot, the boys running off ahead of them.

​Of course, just as they’d predicted, as soon as a few people noticed them heading over and holding hands, more heads began to turn and whispers swept throughout the crowd. Not that they could actually hear anything, as the noise from the rest of the people and the kids playing around them drowned it out, but it was obvious that people were talking. And although the looks they were receiving were ones of pleasant surprisedness and warm smiles, it didn’t make it any less uncomfortable to be the center of attention like this.

​Acting completely unaware, Emmett pulled Y/N along with him as they made it to the bleachers and found a place to sit. As they climbed up, a few people greeted them, and Y/N or Emmett responded with a greeting back as they finally sat down. Letting out another breath, Y/N quickly looked around and felt at least two dozen sets of eyes on them as she and Emmett got settled. She turned to him and spoke very quietly.

​“Everyone is staring at us,” she said.

​“Then we should give them something to stare at,” he replied, and he slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer.

​“Emmett...” Y/N responded, although she didn’t pull away from him.

​“Did you want me to make it even more obvious, princess?” he replied with a playful threat. He then leaned over and whispered in her ear. “Because I can put my hand between your legs like it was the other night, instead.”

​Blushing, Y/N looked at him.

​“Don’t you dare,” she said quietly, and Emmett smiled.

​Before too long, Max left his friends and made his way over to them, sitting down on the bleacher below them and happily chatting as the game began. Gradually, people’s attention shifted forward as the teams stepped onto the field, and when Henry looked over towards them from his spot out on the diamond, Y/N raised her hand and waved at him, and he gave a big smile as Emmett also gave him a thumbs up.

​A couple of times during the first several innings, people periodically glanced over to Y/N and Emmett, but it wasn’t until Max asked for something to drink and Y/N offered to take him over to the concession stand did anyone say anything.

​As they waited in line, Y/N was approached by Jackie, a woman whose son played on Henry’s team and whose husband, Tim, was a friend of Emmett’s. After getting a drink for Max, Y/N let him run back to Emmett as she and Jackie stood talking. Her eyes met Emmett’s as she watched Max run off, and he winked at her.

​“So, it’s official, then?” Jackie asked her.

​“What is?” Y/N said in response, although she knew exactly what she meant.

​“You and Emmett are really together?”

​“Well, yes, but...you already heard that from someone?” Y/N looked at her confusedly.

​Jackie smiled.

​“Everyone knows that you’ve been helping him with the boys, and everyone could also see that you two are crazy about each other. Stacy told me that people really noticed it at the block party. We all knew it was just a matter of time before you got together. Ironically, I think you and Emmett were the only two oblivious ones.”

​Breathing out an embarrassed laugh, Y/N placed a hand on her forehead.

​“Oh, God,” she said with a groan. “So, this has been a topic of discussion prior to today?”

​“I’m afraid so,” Jackie answered with a smile. “I think some people even had bets going as to how long it’d take before you two got together.”

​Y/N shook her head.

​“I’m glad we’ve been such a source of entertainment,” she said with jovial sarcasm. “I knew people would talk; I didn’t realize they’d already been talking.”

​Jackie smiled again.

​“If it’s any consolation, everyone is very happy for you two. And for the boys. God knows they could use a woman like you in their life. They were so young when Norah left, and everyone was shocked.”

​At the mention of Emmett’s ex-wife, Y/N felt a little uncomfortable, and she fidgeted with her hands as she stood there. She’d obviously never met the woman, but she’d learned through others what her name was, and Melissa had filled her in on how she’d left Emmett and the boys. Truthfully, it was something she would like to have a little more information on, but she’d figured Emmett would open up to her about that when he was ready. She knew that he knew she was aware of the general situation, but he hadn’t elaborated on it yet.

​“Well, that’s not anything I can really speak about. That all happened before I had even moved back here,” Y/N said.

She still felt awkward, and although she’d heard that things between Emmett and Norah had been on the rocks, she still found herself feeling the slightest bit threatened by this woman she’d never met. Before Norah had left, had she been a big presence around here? Were people going to constantly be comparing Y/N to her?

“Well, it’s just so nice to see you both happy,” Jackie said, changing the subject. “Tim and I would love it if you two would come over for dinner some night, or we could all go out together.”

“That’d be great,” Y/N smiled at her, forcing herself to forget about her uncertainty regarding the whole Norah situation. She knew she should focus on the present, not on the past.

As she said goodbye to Jackie and turned to head back towards Emmett, she smiled as she saw him goofing around with Max and cheering on Henry. Once again, the surreal feeling of being a family washed over her, and as she thought about what a wonderful man Emmett was, how happy he’d made her recently, and how he lived for those boys, she felt her heart swell, knowing that she could find everything she wanted with him.

But, she knew she shouldn’t focus too much on that, either. After all, it was too soon for any of that kind of thinking.

Never mind that deep down, she knew she already loved Emmett.

•.•.•.•.•

Emmett watched from the bleachers as Y/N cheered on Henry from the concession stand, and then squeezed Max’s shoulder and talked to him as he looked up at her adoringly. Emmett felt a sense wash over him, the same as what he’d felt that night they’d had dinner together in her kitchen. As he looked at Y/N, he thought once more about what a loving woman she was and how sweet she’d made his life lately. He again had the feeling that this was how it was supposed to be, and he could see them as a family. Once again, the same image that had popped into his head at the block party crossed his mind, and as he pictured Y/N pregnant, and then holding their baby in her arms, he knew he was already in love with her.

“So, when’s the wedding?” came Stacy’s voice suddenly.

Turning his head, Emmett saw that she’d come up beside where he sat in the bleachers and was looking up at him with a smirk. She’d mentioned to him that she’d be coming by to catch some of the game and cheer Henry on, but as he heard what she said, Emmett gave her a look. This was not the time or place for her to get nosy, especially with so many other ears listening.

“Don’t start,” he replied, and Stacy just grinned.

“Well, now that you guys have made it public, you know that that’s the next thing everyone’s wondering, right?”

“You and every other person in this town needs to get a hobby,” Emmett answered quietly. Fortunately, the people closest to them on the bleachers had stepped away, but he still wasn’t going to entertain Stacy’s prodding, especially here.

“How have the boys been about all this?” she then asked Emmett.

“Just fine,” he said with a slow nod. “They were behind the whole thing.”

Stacy grinned.

“So I heard, from Henry,” she said. “I hope you raised his allowance.”

Emmett just exhaled a laugh.

“Well,” Stacy then continued, “I just wanted to offer to take the boys off your hands any time you want. I can imagine it might be difficult for you two to have any time alone with them around.”

That was the truth. Even though the boys knew that he and Y/N were together, she and Emmett had decided that it wasn't a good idea to have her spending the night if the boys were home. While Emmett wouldn’t have cared so much, Y/N was adamant that it wasn’t appropriate and that it could cause confusion for them, not to mention it would inevitably bring about some awkward conversations. So, they’d agreed that she’d only spend the night if the boys weren’t home, and that meant that, much to each of their dismay, sex wasn’t as easy to have as they’d like. In fact, it’d more often than not been reduced to quickies while the boys played outside, and as fun as that could be, Emmett wanted Y/N in his bed at night and to be able to hold her for more than 30 seconds, and Y/N desperately wanted the same. They’d only had one opportunity for that over the past week, when each of the boys had been at sleepovers.

“Yeah, Y/N’s insistent on keeping it as G-rated as possible around the boys, and as much as I hate to admit it, it’s probably the right choice. At least at this point.”

Stacy nodded.

“I’ll pick them up tomorrow after camp and then they can spend the night at my house. The kids have been dying to have a sleepover in the tent in the backyard, anyway.”

“Thanks,” Emmett said with a nod of his head, and then Stacy laughed.

“What?” Emmett asked.

“I just never thought I’d play a part in helping my big brother get laid,” she said. “This is a point in our relationship I never saw coming.”

Emmett couldn’t help but laugh, too.

“I owe you, we’ll put it that way,” he said.

Stacy laughed once more, and then she spoke again.

“As long as I get to make a speech at the wedding, then we’ll call it even,” she teased him with a grin.

@nyxxie-pooh @xsweetcatastrophe @allie131313 @hannibellector @beastofburdenxo

@betty21rose @febris-amatoria @alltoowellbeneaththemangotree @wild-rose-35 @meister95

@garrison-girl-08 @aphroditeslover11 @hudson-bay-girl @shopgirl6us @galactict3a

@fairytale07 @neonpurplestars89-blog @devotedlyshadowytheorist @natalie--rushman @ceirinen

#emmett a quiet place 2 #emmett a quiet place 2 x reader #emmett x female reader #emmett fic #emmett smut #emmett a quiet place 2 fic #cillian murphy #cillian fic #cillian x fem!reader #cillian murphy smut #18+ only

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

medialog april 2k24

ok. sick day catch up part two

watched

monkey man - this was gnarly and fun and dev patel, quite simply the hottest man ever to live, is upsettingly hot in this film, like SO hot oh my fucking god

white room - this was a VERY weird movie that (as per the filmmaker q & a) totally flopped at a film festival and never received distribution... you can kinda see why but i more or less liked it. it's about a weird sheltered repressed dude who accidentally sees the murder of a mysterious pop star and then accidentally befriends and falls in love with the woman who was actually the reclusive songwriter and voice of the act... the filmmaker described it as a "journey through genres" and it was very artistically ambitious in a way that maybe didn't totally work but it had some really good stuff about art/consumption/fame/women (my jam) and it frequently looked gorgeous and also all of the mysterious/reclusive pop singer's songs were big late 80s/early 90s style upbeat synth-bombast numbers with lyrics taken from emily dickinson poems which is soooooo funny and a great idea

alien - this is like die hard in that if i'd seen it ten years ago i would not really have understood the hype but seeing after i had a backwards education in film by watching all of the mcu movies and developing curiosity about the question of why they were bad and ugly in such distinct ways and from there developing a nascent and unsophisticated appreciation of the filmic qualities of film i'm like, wow what an incredibly fucking well made movie!!!!!! some things in particular i liked were (1) no substantive backstory for anyone, no dark secrets except the one that really counted, no traumatic pasts, no explanation for how this world works or why anyone was here except needing a job, just giving us the bare minimum to understand the situation the characters find themselves in and trusting the story to do the rest (2) very good spaceshippy spaceship (another way it's like die hard is lots of great Texture, another thing that the MCU lacks which like many other MCU traits was actually a totally fitting design choice for tech bro billionaire tony stark in iron man but simply did not need to expand to Everything...) (3) sigourney weaver so good! ian holmes also very good (4) lots of suspense through silence which is one of the most lost of lost arts in the realm of big expensive Cool Shit Happens cinema!

roy cohn/jack smith - this was a filmed recording of two monologues performed by ron vawter, a gay actor who died of AIDS, each in the character of another gay man who had AIDS - the notorious roy cohn & the experimental cinema icon jack smith. i don't really have much to say about it but i feel very lucky to have seen it and vawter was incredible - i'm glad also that he happened to come to our attention a few months ago because he played the therapist in sex lies & videotape.

mad max: fury road - ok i kept putting this off because the way people talked about it on the internet frankly emphasized to an off-putting degree the ideas in this movie and did not adequately convey to me personally the most important thing about it which is that it Fucking Owns Lmao Wow. we happened to pause it for some reason like 50 minutes in and i swear to you i would have guessed 15, maybe 20 minutes had passed, that's how much it flies by... the coolest shit ever, i wanted to live there forever! also lottie yellowjackets is one of the wives????

mission: impossible 3 - the worst movie in the entire world. we only revisited this one as part of our ongoing marathon with some friends and we spent the whole time complaining about jj abrams' totally inept camera work... seriously watch this movie and look out for (1) every time an already fast sequence is torn up with a zillion stupid little cuts some of which actively prevent us from seeing something that could have been cool (2) every time we get to a new location and the camera starts aimlessly drifting to the side literally immediately because he's afraid we'll get bored if we sit in a location for one whole second (3) every time 3 people are having a conversation and the camera spends the whole time just purposelessly wafting back and forth side to side for, i cannot emphasize this enough, no reason at all. literally nothing in this, an installment of the Stuff Looking Cool franchise, looks even a little bit cool even one time. people hate on 2 for the male gaze of it all re: thandie newton but her character has more personality and agency than ethan's sexy lamp wife in this. the closest to a redeeming value this movie has is that it really feels like part of the goal was to remind everyone of how even though tom cruise jumped on that couch one time he's actually a very normal american heterosexual man (he passes out at one point and flashes back to his wife in her underwear sdksoeroser it's SO dumb) but because he's tom cruise (a total insane freak) he can't convincingly portray that at all and just comes across as insane and maybe a sociopath. "what about philip seymour hoffman" i'm not going to give abrams credit for knowing PSH was a good actor, that's like saying defending a doctor accused of malpractice by saying he knows that feet generally have toes. be serious. i will give a shout out to simon pegg, who is in this less than i remembered but who comes across as the MVP (across what should be a deep bench of a cast!) of making abrams' horrible comic-book-bro-patter come across as something a human might say, mostly so i can also share my friend's insight when i said that which is that it makes sense pegg is suited to the task given that he cut his teeth largely on movies that are parodies of shitty action movies.

mission: impossible - ghost protocol - a wonderful and perfect treat :) i've gone on at length about this one before and really have nothing left to say but it's so good and so specifically good at all the things 3 sucks ass at... my friend was physically squirming next to me on the couch during the burj khalifa sequence, as is right and proper :)

read

beautiful losers - this is a novel leonard cohen wrote in the 60s that is very weird and experimental and i'll be real with you and say i did not get it. it's about a guy whose wife and best friend he had a weird sexual relationship with are both dead and now he's kind of obsessed with an iroquois saint... i am not sure how to describe it but i guess i would say if you think the music of leonard cohen is too optimistic and insufficiently horny for you maybe you would like this. it is probably the most aggressively sexual book i've ever read but not in an erotic way... it's very like about the nastiness of sex and bodies... which i admire ideologically on a certain level but it's really quite unrelenting with it... occasionally there are snatches of deeply beautiful writing though.

listened

sourpatch, stagger & fade - nick put on the vinyl of this and i was like oh that sounds nice and i wound up listening to it a bit... fuzzy indie rock (i'm not educated enough to parse genres more finely than that) that makes for very pleasant background listening

ariana grande, eternal sunshine - i've never kept up with ariana because i just find her voice kind of annoying and i had never heard a song to challenge that UNTIL we reviewed "we can't be friends" at singles jukebox and ariana teaming up with max martin to do kidz bop body talk era robyn turned out to be everything i wanted from her... unfortunately the rest of the album was incredibly boring lol. love that song tho!

maggie rogers, don't forget me - i don't know that i find this one as interesting as her last album or quite as likable as her first (although that might be me somewhat overrating her first because i love "light on" sooooo much) but she's such a capital-M Musician she's always a pleasure to listen to. "drunk" was an early fave but recently i found myself returning a lot to "the kill"

girl in red, i'm doing it again baby! - girl in red comes a lot when other people are talking about the g*yl*rs as one of the actual queer artists they should support but first of all they actually love her and second of all i listened to this album twice straight through and have let some of the songs play on shuffle since and i could not hum you one single line :/

taylor swift, the tortured poets department - speak of the devil! i mean i've talked about this. i like this album a lot - at this point i'm ready to call it easily her best work except for maybe folklore, and honestly i find it hard to assess folklore out of what a special lockdown treat it felt like at the time. i don't expect a world insistent on calling 1989 pop perfection to eventually agree with me but i think people will mellow out about it in time and forget that it was so divisive on release much as has happened with reputation (an album far worthier of scorn if not without its occasional merits) and at the VERY least i think in like 5 years it will be more or less consensus that it's better than midnights.

the starting line, say it like you mean it - i listened to this album mostly to fact-check claims i was making about emo in the taylor swift piece but then i kept listening to it cuz it was kinda full of bops!

fall out boy, take this to your grave - @voidofcourse recommended this as a stepping stone from the starting line for loud guys offering bops and indeed it too was full of bops!

other

an enemy of the people - i saw this on broadway, yes, 1000% literally just because my boy my king my number one guy jeremy strong was in it. the production was interesting and good if not flawless, and although i think some of the younger cast members got a little lost in the old-fashioned theatrical language (even in a new translation) and could have used some direction towards really pulling out the meaning of individual sentences they were saying, the more seasoned actors all did a great job, including, of course, jeremy strong, who got to be shoved into a pit and have pretend ice thrown at him, i'm so happy for him. also the play was incredible? like as a play? i said as much here after seeing it but basically it's about this doctor who discovers that the town baths that are about to open have a contaminated water supply that is definitely going to result in people getting sick and some of them dying, especially since they are being advertised partly for their health-restoring properties for people who are already not doing well, and he's like, wow, good thing i caught this thanks to the help of science so we can change plans, and then everyone else in town is like, but have you considered that would be expensive? why do you hate poor people? (there's a thread specifically about the editor of the radical leftist newspaper going from being the doctor's number one champion to being totally coopted out of both politics and self-interest that was particularly brutal to watch...) like it was truly SO incredibly specifically relevant to some Extremely Contemporary Issues that i was just agog and also it was incredibly fucking upsetting to watch! really really great playwriting, such a clean example of how a work can best encompass & comment on ideas by developing them through character and dramatic action rooted in wants, needs, choices, conflict, etc., a lesson many people could stand to learn. i kept thinking it had burrowed as deeply into the core issues as it could and then it found another layer. this ibsen guy... he really knew some stuff about stuff....

#media 2k24 #isabel 2k24

[mariailoveyou-guerin]

Colin certified lover boy I’m just a romantic Bridgerton

when it comes to the woman he loves this man moves fast and ready to move heaven and earth even faster society rules be dammed and I just love him for that!

Comes to their rescue we love a gentleman this how you see that it was different with lord Debling and pen because he didn’t come to her rescue from dress thing but colin did with drink thing and Marina with the old man! he sees when his loved needs him and steps in!

Oh she spilled because he really knows how to do that!

He sure loves himself dramatic pretty tiny girls in pink he’s just like me for real 😆 colin I love you my best boy

what’s with his girls and throwing themselves at bed all dramatically 😂 no wonder he’s become dramatic too!

the fact that Daphne is the one sister who knows him best says this 😂 she didn’t have to spill his business like that to the streets but she did! And there’s so many other scenes of Colin breaking every society rules for Pen and Marina to many for me to handle like being alone a lot unchaperoned like my boy dont care He so silly when he’s in love and I love that my little himbo!

#bridgerton #penelope featherington #marina thompson #polin #colin bridgerton #Marina crane

[im-sleepdeprived]

Seasonal • Pt. 1

pairing: peter parker x reader

a/n: ahhhhh here is the long awaited ‘Peter’ inspired fic !!! (i changed the name obvs but you’ll get why i chose this one later) this is actually pretty slow (in my opinion, compared to what’s to come duh) but its cute and I really enjoyed writing it, i hope you guys enjoy reading. also TOTALLY feel free to tell me what you think and what you might like to see !! i always love some feedback

warnings: awkward teens lmfao (they’re such cutie pies), there’s some mention of injuries, but dw I made it funny, mostly building up for what’s to come later, fluff (for now lol) !!

masterlist, requests are open !!

There were few certainties in life. Tuesday followed Monday, Five plus five equals ten, and you had no shot in hell with Peter Parker. 

You’d known each other for most of your lives, going to the same schools, and growing up in the same neighborhoods, until eventually, sometime around the start of freshman year, he and his Aunt moved into your apartment building. 

You still remembered the excitement your little teen self had felt as you’d watched them move their things in. You remembered thinking his aunt looked like the sweetest woman in the world. And Peter…well he looked like the sweetestboy in your world. The boy of your dreams. 

Dreams you always kept to yourself of course. 

Dreams that suddenly, didn’t feel so far away, and for once in your life you felt like maybe, just maybe, you had the tiniest shot at having something with him. Something real. 

It all started one day after school. 

You’d had a long day. Longer than usual. 

Classes had been tough with exams coming up and you were stressed out from all the notes you had to make sure you had, to the homework that needed to be done, to the piles upon piles of books you needed to read, study, and memorize parts of. It was a lot. 

So, naturally, you weren’t really aware of your surroundings as you were walking home that evening. You’d been cramming in the library and you hadn’t realized how late it had gotten, but of course, that didn’t stop you from continuing your studying on the way home. With a book in hand, you made your way through the streets.

Of course, it was New York. So, of course, that wouldn’t fly. Faster than you could blink, someone had grabbed your bag and was running off. you stood there, mouth gaping. Fuck, your keys were in there and your parents weren’t home. How the hell were you going to-

“Here you go ma’am, sorry about him, he has daddy issues,” Spider-Man said to you with a wave of his hands. Spider-Man. You didn’t reply at first. 

“Y’know, you should be more of your surroundings,” he said gently this time. “Maybe put the book away for now? I don’t know, just a suggestion.” He absentmindedly rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged slightly. 

You’d know that voice anywhere. It was the voice you daydreamed about, the voice you heard across the hall, the voice you’d been hearing basically all your life. But that action, that little quirk, confirmed everything you were just thinking. 

“Peter?”

“WHAT?” The white eyes of his mask were blown wide. “No. Nuh-uh, I don’t even know anyone named Peter. Sounds like a douchey name if you ask me.”

You would’ve laughed if you weren’t so shocked. “Peter I know what you sound like,” your voice was soft so no one around you could hear. It was late and this particular street was pretty deserted but you figured you couldn’t be too careful. 

He was quiet for a moment before sighing and bringing both hands to rub at the face of his mask. He grumbled. “Ok fine, it is me. But Y/N you can’t tell anyone, I mean anyone, okay? Otherwise, this whole thing is ruined.”

You felt a pang in your chest. You knew you weren’t the best of friends or anything, but you’d known each other for a long time and you thought there was a certain respect that came with that. Of course you weren’t going to go around yelling out his secret. 

“I would never do that. Actually, I’m sorry I said anything, that was stupid. We can forget this ever happened. Thanks for the bag,” you held it up for emphasis, “I needed my keys.” You moved to walk past him but he grabbed your shoulder.

“Wait, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to totally freak out on you it’s just…no one knows about this. And I don’t want them to know. It would complicate things.”

“Things like what? Like running around in a bright onesie and calling yourself a man when you’re barely a teenager?” You replied in a teasing tone, hoping he wouldn’t feel as bad that you figured him out so quick.

He laughed. “Among other things, yeah. What book are you reading anyway?” He asked, nodding to the book you still held in your hand and you wondered if he was trying to change the subject. 

You figured you’d let him. Holding up the book, you replied, “‘Biology: A Self-Teaching Guide’,” you smiled sarcastically. “It’s self-teaching because Mr. Harrington is shit at his job!”

Peter cackled. “I know exactly what you mean. You know, the other day he spent the last thirty minutes of class checking his fantasy football? Class is forty-five minutes!”

You shook your head, smiling slightly. “I wonder how he still has his job,” you mused. 

“Oh, that’s easy, no one is reporting him because no one minds. He lets every do as they  please so they all love him.”

“True.” You laughed. Some time since you’d started talking, you’d both started walking towards your building. 

“Are you walking me home now?” You held your breath. Obviously, he had every right to just swing away right then but…you hoped he didn’t.

“Well you obviously can’t be trusted to walk alone, honestly I really think that if I left right now, you’d open that book back up and walk into a lamppost.”

You threw your head back laughing. “Okay,” you held up both your hands in surrender, “fair enough.”

And while you’ve both known each other for a long time, you truly think that this walk was when you really clicked with Peter. He was funny, he was smart, and he was obviously the most selfless person you knew if he spent all his free time ridding New York’s streets of criminals without anyone giving him credit. 

When you reached your apartment building, you wished you hadn’t. You could’ve spent all night talking to him and youwere scared that once you walked through those doors things would go back to polite smiles and quiet ‘heys’. You didn’t want that. 

“Hey…if that ever happens again, and I’ll do my best to make sure it doesn’t,” he gestured to his suit, “but if it does and you lose your keys or something, you can always hang out at mine. If you want to of course.”

“You wanna hang out?” You asked confused

He seemed to have taken it the wrong way. “Oh! I didn’t mean to sound weird, I was just thinking-”

“Yes!” You blurted out, your face heating up. “I mean, yeah hanging out sounds cool. Maybe even…if I still have my keys?”

“Yeah, yeah that sounds great. Obviously I didn’t mean you had to be locked out to hang out but yeah…” He scratched the back of his neck again and you imagined his cheeks flaming up just like yours under his mask. 

“Cool,” you nodded. 

“Cool,” he nodded back. 

You two stared at each other for a while. 

“Well, I should…” You jutted your thumb at the door as your voice trailed off. At least he wanted to see you again. That meant something, right?

“Right. Yeah, of course. See ya later Y/N.” He waved and you returned it. 

“See you later Peter,” your hand flew up to your mouth. “Shit. Sorry, um, I’ll see you- I mean bye Spider-Man.” Idiot. 

You rushed to through the door, leaving a smiling Peter in your wake. 

You were psyched Peter wanted to hang out with you on more casual terms. It was all you’d dreamed of for as long as you could remember. You’re little crush on him dated back further than you could really remember, but you knew it started sometime back in kindergarten. So you were rightfully excited that things were finally progressing, you just weren’t expecting it to happen so soon.

Later that day you were sitting in your room when suddenly you heard a tap on your window. Peter, fully decked out in his Spider-Man suit, was perched on your fire escape. 

Your brows furrowed but you rushed over to let him in. “Um, hey? What’s up?”

“Oh nothing much, same old same old. You?” He said casually as if you’d known each other your whole lives. Well, you kinda had. But still.

You stared at him a bit before you heard a dripping noise. At first you thought it was rain. And then you realized it wasn’t raining, nor had it rained at all recently. You looked down to see blood dripping. From Peter. Blood was dripping from Peter onto your fire escape. Shit. 

“It’s okay. It’s not that bad honestly.” He said lightly, but you noticed the slight edge to his voice. It definitely was that bad. 

You wanted to freak out. You wanted to tell him to go to a hospital so he could get proper treatment but you had a feeling he wouldn’t listen. 

“Peter,” you said, your voice soft but urgent. “What are you doing here?”

“You’re the only one who knows. I wanted to see a familiar face right now and if I went to see anyone else it would take too much explaining,” he shuffled around on your fire escape, wincing as he did so. He finally settled, leaning his backagainst the railing and laying his feet in front of him. He ripped off his mask, “I’m sorry Y/N, I don’t wanna freak you out. This was just the first place I thought of and-”

“No no no. It’s okay! Better than you passing out in some alley somewhere.”

“Exactly, you get it!” 

You side-eyed him. “Y’know, I think you’re too enthusiastic for someone who looks like they had sex with a cheese grater.”

He chuckled. “Funny. You’re real funny, you know that. Sex with a cheese grater,” he mumbled, leaning his head back. He chuckled again. “That’s hilarious.”

“Okay….alright just…..” You worried your hands. You had less than no clue what to do. But you had to figure out something. Soon. Otherwise, you’d have a dead teenage boy on your fire escape and you really didn’t know how you would explain that to your parents, and you didn’t want to figure it out.

You held up your hands. “Wait here and I’ll be right back.”

“I can’t imagine where I might go right now, but alright.” You heard him mumble under his breath, his head lolling to one side. You would’ve sasses him right back if you were so worried. You had to admit, it was admirable how he still managed to cling to his humor even when he was so hurt. 

You ran to the shared bathroom in your apartment, making sure to keep quiet so as not to wake anyone. Things were already hard enough. 

You grabbed an old first aid kit (you’d always thought it was stupid and unnecessary to carry around but here it was, saving your ass) before making your way back to your room. You closed the door and locked it for good measure before crawling out of your window and sitting on your knees beside him. 

“Ok. I’m gonna need you to help me though, do you think you could do that?”

He nodded softly and you got to work. It was nerve-racking but you got through it. Peter helped a lot, explaining what needed mending, and what would be fine being left alone. “I heal faster.” He’d explained to you and you had no choice but to believe him. 

When you’d finished you went to the kitchen and poured both of you cups of lemonade. “You should probably be drinking water or tea or something but oh well.” You shrugged as you stepped out of your window again, handing him the cup and settling on the other side of the fire escape. 

“I prefer this.” He said as he took the cup from you. “Thanks.”

“No thank you,” you said in a serious voice. “For serving this city.” You placed your now empty hand on your heart and bowed your head in respect. 

“Shut up,” he said, but he was laughing. You laughed as well. “So how did the whole Spider-Man thing start? Last I remember you were just little Petey in the robotics club.”

“Still in the robotics club, but somewhere in the midst of that I got bit by a radioactive spider.” He went off, telling you the whole story and you listened with both ears, tuned into his every word. It was crazy to you that the boy across the hall, the boy you’d known since you were children, had been through all of this. Alone. Your heart broke a little for him at that moment and you were glad he finally had someone he could talk to about this, even if it was just you. 

“Wow.” You shook your head in disbelief after he’d finished. “Not really sure where you got the whole ‘I need to put on a suit and get out there!’ attitude after being bedridden from a spider bite for a whole day, but good for you!”

He let out a loud laugh. “Alright Ace, enough about me. Tell me something about you.”

“Ace?” You asked with a furrow in your brows. 

He shook his head smiling, “Think it suits you, don’t you?”

Your face lit on fire. You looked down at your hands, “Um, well there’s not really much. What do you wanna know?”

“Anything. What are you interested in, something you’ve never told anyone?”

You peered over the fire escape railing and looked up at the sky. “Stars.”

“Stars?” He asked. 

You nodded. “Stars. Constellations. They all have stories, they’re named after certain things. People used to use them as guides when they traveled! But it’s stupid, I mean,” you scoffed, “we live in New York. There’s no regular stars here, let alone constellations.”

He stared at you for a while and you stared feeling nervous. He probably thought you were weird for bringing that up, how fucking random to just start going off about stars, normals people are interested in sports, art—

He started nodding, “Tell you what, when I’m healed, which won't be long, we’re gonna go see some stars.”

Your brows furrowed together. “What?”

He chuckled at your expression, all he could think was how cute he thought you looked. “Yeah, you heard me. We’re gonna go see some stars. Consider it a thank you for helping me today.”

Your cheeks flushed. “You don’t need to thank me for anything Pete, I’d help you no matter what.”

Now it was his turn to flush. “Thank you,” he said in a sincere voice. “But fine. Just think of it as two friends stargazing together.” He grinned.

Friends. That sounded nice. “Wait I didn’t know you could drive?”

He grinned even wider before standing up. You followed his lead, making sure he didn’t hurt himself in any way. “Thanks for everything Ace, but I think that’s enough for now.”

He moved to jump off the balcony but you stopped him, “Wait! At least use the front door, everyone’s asleep.” 

He slipped his mask back on and quickly shook his head, “Thanks but May’s asleep and I don’t wanna risk it.”

You nodded. “Right. Well bye then, and if you need anything Peter, you know where to find me.”

“Ditto,” he said, moving to stand on the railing of your fire escape. He gave you a two-finger salute. “G’night Ace.”

“Goodnight Pete-” your hands flew up to your mouth and you had to hold back a scream as you watched him completelyfall backward off your fire escape. “What the fuck!” You whisper-shouted, moving to the railing just in time to see him swinging away. 

“Son of a bitch,” you whispered softly and you could’ve sworn you heard him laugh. 

“Peter there’s no way I’m doing that.”

“C’mon Ace, I do it all the time!”

“That’s not the same and you know it! Have you ever tried swinging around the whole city with someone else?”

He went quiet for a moment. “Well, not around the whole city per se, but…I’ve swung while holding someone!”

“How long?” You deadpanned. 

He looked down and mumbled something incoherent. 

“How. Long.” You repeated. 

“Like, around the block maybe?” He looked at you sheepishly. 

You scoffed, “Peter fucking Parker I can’t believe you're trying to get me to agree to letting you drop me from thousands of feet in the air!”

“Hey come on! If I wanted to kill you I wouldn’t ask for permission, I would just do it.”

You narrow your eyes at him and he raises both his hands. It’d been a week since the night on your fire escape and Peter was fully healed. He really did heal faster than average because when you’d asked him to see the wound, it had been completely gone. Not even a scar was left.

“Y’know, if you wanted me to take my shirt off Ace, you could’ve just asked.” He’d said with a boyish smirk. 

“You fucking wish dipshit.” You had shoved him away but you couldn’t help the little smile working its way onto your face. 

You’d spent time together after that night, walking to school together, Peter popping by after patrol if you were still awake to just hang out for a bit. It was great. Until now. 

Peter had decided it was time for him to make good on his promise to take you to see the stars and you were refusing. 

“Please Ace, let me do this.” He gave you a little pout making you bite your lip in consideration. He tried not to smile, he was winning and he knew it. 

Silence. And then, “Where are we even going?” Bingo. 

He didn’t try to hide his grin now. “You’ll see. I know a place, it’s perfect for something like this.” He approached you and his voice turned sincere. “And I promise I won’t drop you, trust me, I know what I’m doing.”

“How can I trust you when you just told me the furthest you’ve ever swung with someone was a block,” you grumbled, but you didn’t push him away when he moved to hold you. 

“Enough complaining,” he said as he wrapped an arm around your waist. “Arms around my neck Ace, hold tight.”

He suddenly pulled you in, clinging to you tighter than before and you had just started to think maybe this wasn’t so bad. But then he jumped. And you screamed. 

Your stomach fell and you kept thinking you’d hit the pavement, he’d swing too low, or maybe he’d accidentally run into a building he hadn’t noticed. But when none of those things happened it actually became sort of…fun. 

“I can’t believe I’m riding Spider-Man!” You screamed, thinking he wouldn’t hear you because of the wind but you were proven wrong when you heard him hollering with laughter. 

You smiled as you clung to him. You should have trusted him at the start although there were times when he would dip lower than normal and if you didn’t know any better you would’ve thought he was doing it on purpose because every time he did, you clutched him even tighter.

Soon, the ruckus of the city seemed to die down and you could hear the thwip of his webs clearer than before. It wasn’t long after that you were landing on a tall hill making you wonder just how fast he could get around with those webs. 

Peter set you down and you immediately missed being in his arms. But then you turned around. 

“Oh my god,” you whispered. You could see the entire New York skyline and it was stunning. This city really was beautiful, it wasn’t for everyone, but it would always own a special place in your heart. 

You heard Peter chuckle beside you before he placed his hands on your shoulders. “I know, but that’s not what we’re here for Ace.” He pulled you a bit, making your head lean back. And then you understood. 

“Oh my god,” you said, louder than before. The stars were glittering above you both, the sky like a sparkling black fabric shielding you both. “They’re real!”

Peter laughed again. “I know right?” 

You looked back at him. “Peter this is….I don’t even have words for how amazing this is. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.”

His heart melted at that moment. He gave you a smile so soft it reminded you of fluffy clouds and soft ice cream on a hot summer day. “You like it?” He asked almost as if he wasn’t expecting you to. 

You looked at him in disbelief. “Do I like it? Of course, I do! It's beautiful! How’d you find this place anyway?”

He shrugged, “Oh y’know, just found it while I was swinging along one day. But hey,” he said quickly, making you question if that was how he actually found this place. “Look I set up a place for us.”

You decided not to question him any further and you let him lead you through a few overgrown bushes until you reached a small clearing. There lay a small picnic blanket with snacks and drinks set up.

You look back at him. “Are you for real right now?”

His mouth falls open. “I’m sorry! I—I didn’t mean-”

You pulled him into a hug. “Thank you so much, Peter. I mean…wow, I just…wow.”

He held you even tighter. “You don’t need to thank me, honestly I’ve been waiting for forever to go on a date with you soreally thank you for even being here-”

You went slack in his arms and Peter had never wanted to beat himself up more than he did in that moment. You pulled away and looked up at him with questioning eyes, “Date?”

Peter blanched, you never knew someone could look so pale, yet be blushing so much at the same time. He was gaping like a fish, his mouth kept opening and closing as if words were supposed to be coming out, they just weren’t reaching your ears. 

“Because,” you continued, deciding you needed to step up and help him out a little, “a date sounds good. Really good. I’d just like to be aware of the fact that I’m on one.”

He looked at you with wide eyes. “Are you—are you sure? Cause I can just shut up and we can totally pretend that never happened.”

You laughed and shook your head. “I’m sure. If you are, of course.”

“Yes! I mean—” He scratched the back of his neck and sighed. “I’m sorry I just made this really weird didn’t I?”

You laughed again and gently placed your hands on his shoulder, making sure to look him dead in the eyes. “Peter,” you made sure he was listening. “S’not weird. At least, I don’t think it is. Okay, so we’re on a date! Love that for us. The onlything I would’ve changed is my outfit.” You looked down and pouted. “First time I’ve gone out with someone in my pajamas.”

“Well, I love it. I think you look beautiful.” He grinned. He seemed to have relaxed a little after your reassurances. 

You looked down to hide the blush forming on your cheeks. “Yeah yeah, save the flattery for the second date.”

“Will do.” He laughed and grabbed your hand. He led you to the picnic blanket and moved some things around. You realized he must’ve come here earlier to get things ready and your heart warmed at the thought. 

Peter set out the snacks and drinks and the two of 

“Here lay down,” he said to you after he’d cleared things out of your way. 

“God Parker, at least buy me dinner first.” You rolled your eyes dramatically but obeyed and laid flat on your back.  

“What do you think all that was?” He shot back with a grin. 

You shrugged as you settled yourself on the blanket and he moved to lay next to you. “More of a midnight snack.”

He laughed, “Noted.”

You turned your head towards him and nudged him a little with your elbow, getting him to look back. “So…what are we doing.”

He laughed again. “We’re stargazing Ace, that was kinda the whole point.”

“Oh, right, right.” You nodded and went quiet.

“What’re you thinking?” He asked. 

“Star stuff.”

“What do you mean ‘star stuff’?” He asked, voice full of poorly concealed laughter. 

“Like the fact that I don’t know shit about stars.” You admitted. 

He chuckled beside you before bringing his head right beside yours. “Okay see that really bright star with a bunch ofother stars crowding around it?” He pointed until you got it. 

When you nodded he said, “What does that tell you?”

“That it’s an extrovert?” You leaned back to look at him.

“No,” he shook his head smiling. “That’s Rigel. It’s a blue supergiant star in the constellation of Orion. And actually,” he shuffled a little closer. “See those three big stars all next to each other?”

You nodded, forgetting all the jokes and focusing on everything he was saying. 

“That’s Orion's belt,” he continued. “Each of those three stars is actually way bigger, and brighter than the sun.”

“Woah,” you looked at him wide-eyed. “Where’d you learn all this?”

“Oh y’know,” he waved a hand casually. 

You gaped. You propped yourself up on your elbows so you could look at him. “I absolutely do not know. First, I thought you were just Peter Parker. Then, I find out you’re also Spider-Man. And then, I find out you’re Peter Parker, Spider-Man, and also, extremely well-informed on star stuff!”

He laughed, There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me yet Ace.”

You nodded softly. “That’s true. We should change that.”

He looked deep into your eyes and you saw something like wonder in them. “Yeah?” He asked

“Mhm.” You poked him softly in the side. “Wanna know you, Peter Parker. All of you, from the dorky lego-obsessed-kid to the nerdy science genius who secretly fights crime.”

He grinned so wide and you swore it was brighter than any star in the galaxy. You were completely content with this being your view for the rest of the night. “Alright, come here,” he tugged you down making you squeal as he held you in his arms. 

“Hey, eyes on the sky Ace,” he said when he caught you staring.

You blushed and rolled your eyes, “Fine, whatever. I don’t wanna look at you anyway.” The complete opposite of what you were just thinking.

He smirked as if he knew too. “Sure thing babe. Now let me dazzle you with more star stuff.”

The ‘ride’ (if you could even call it that) back to your place was quiet and peaceful, and a part of you thought it was a tad bit longer than the way there

Peter landed softly on your fire escape but he didn’t let go of you just yet and you weren’t in a hurry to end the night. 

“So…we’re here.” Said Peter, his voice a bit muffled from the mask. You nodded and reached up, carefully working it off his head. 

“Thank you,” you said, hoping your voice conveyed the sincerity you felt. Everything about tonight was perfect and you hoped he felt the same. 

He smiled softly. “You already said that.”

You nodded. “Maybe. But it doesn’t hurt to say it again. I had an amazing time Peter.”

“Even though you were in your pajamas and you didn’t know it was a date? Well, not at first.” He gave you a questioning look, almost looking unsure. 

You grinned, “Especially because of those things. I don’t know,” you shrugged, “thinks it makes us unique.”

“And if wanted to do something that’s not so unique for the end of a first date?” He gulped. “Figured I kinda owed you something basic about tonight…unless you don’t want to?”

“Peter Parker, are you asking if you can kiss me?” You smiled up at him and he blushed all the way down to his neck. He mumbled something you couldn’t make out. 

“I’m sorry what was that?” You turned your head and leaned in dramatically and you heard him sigh. “Isaidifthatsokaywithyou.” He rushed out. 

You pulled away and stared up at him. “That’s more than okay with me actually.”

He didn’t waste a second. His hands that were resting lightly on your waist gripped you tighter and you grabbed his face, his mask that was in your hand falling to the floor. He captured your lips in an urgent kiss but it was somehow soft at the same time. It felt as if he’d just been waiting to get this chance and now he was savoring it and trying to memorize every part. 

You both pulled away breathlessly. His face was flushed and he looked so cute you had to lean in and give him a few softer pecks. He grinned so wide that you started to laugh. “Why’d you stop?” He asked. 

You laughed harder. “I can't kiss you when you're smiling so hard!”

“Ok ok fine I’ll stop!” He tried to keep a straight face but it didn’t last for 5 seconds before he was grinning again. He rubbed a hand over his face while you giggled at him. “Sorry if I’m super psyched I got to kiss you, I mean look at you.”

That got you to stop laughing and you felt your face start to heat up. You leaned over and landed a big smooch on hischeek. Peter turned pink. “Okay see, that was really great Ace but I really wanna kiss you.”

You smiled, “Then kiss me, bug boy.”

He started to lean in but you pulled back at the last minute, “Hey wait. Did we take longer on the way back than we took going? Or was that just me?”

“Oh that,” he nodded. “Air traffic.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Air traffic?”

Peter cleared his throat, “Look I’m the designated driver, or swinger, I know what’s going on. You don’t need to worry about it Ace, I’ve got it covered. Now I need your lips covering mine, right now.”

“Fine whatever,” you rolled your eyes with affection and leaned in. 

Things couldn’t be more perfect in your life. 

After you and Peter had made things official, he’d invited you over a few times to spend time with May, and you’d asked the same of him with your parents. Of course, your parents knew who Peter was, and May definitely knew who you were (she’d told you as much and you started to wonder if Peter’s crush might date back almost as far as yours. There was a chance) but it was different now that you two were together. 

“Is she gonna make you leave the door cracked?” You whispered as Peter led you by the hand through his apartment and to his bedroom. You two had just gotten back from school and you were going to work on your homework together. Homework which would mostly consist of the two of you making out on his bedroom floor. 

He scoffed. “No. She trusts us.”

“Mhm,” you pondered. “And that has nothing to do with the fact that you asked her to stop embarrassing you when I’m over?” You entered the room and Peter closed the door behind you, but not before he gave you a look. 

You shrugged and smirked a bit as you placed your bag on his floor and started pulling out your textbooks. “Did she say something to you?” He asked. 

Your smirk turned into a full-blown grin. “Y’know I’m actually starting to think she likes me more than you.”

He rolled his eyes. “It’s started, amazing.”

“What’s started?”

“The two of you ganging up on me,” He grumbled which made you laugh out loud. You reached over and squished his face with one hand, your thumb on one cheek, and the rest of your fingers on the other. “You’re adorable when you’re grumpy.”

You felt him fighting off a smile under your fingers. “Adorable enough for a kiss?”

“You can always get a kiss from me, Petey.”

He gave you a serious look. “I’m gonna hold you to that.”

You returned his seriousness with a solemn look of your own. “I hope you do.”

Just as he started to lean in, the door to his room burst open, making you jump away so fast you fell on your back. 

“Hey, kids!” You scrambled back up as May entered the room. “I just wanted to make sure you guys were…okay. Are you okay?”

Peter threw his hands up in exasperation, “May!” 

She held her hands out and quickly said, “I’m sorry! Sorry, but I also wanted to tell you I’m going out and I won’t be here. So be responsible.”

He rolled his eyes. “We’re just going to do some homework.”

She nodded, “Yeah okay, and I totally believe you!” She started inching towards the door. Placing a hand on the frame shesaid, “Pete, remember our talk.” Peter went red. But before he could stop her she went on, “Use protection.”

She flew out the door, leaving you wide-eyed and Peter as red as a tomato. It was quiet between you two for a moment before you decided on what to say. “Soooo….your aunt definitely thinks we’re fucking.”

Peter looked mortified. “Ace I am so sorry-”

“No, it’s okay! Fair assumption, I mean, we are teenagers so it's kinda of what we’re known for right now. Plus, she’s only looking out for us.”

“You’re not mad?” He asked worriedly.

“Why would I be mad Pete? She was actually super chill about it, my parents would’ve dragged you out of the apartment.” He laughed but there was something else on your mind. “Can I ask you something though?”

“Anything,” he answered quickly. 

You smiled, “Have you um—Have you ever…” You trailed off but you knew he understood what you were getting at.

‘OH! Well, no but yes?” You gave him a weird look. “So I mean like…I’ve done stuff but not all the stuff. Y’know?”

You nodded. “Have you…ever?” His voice was quiet as if he were afraid you’d shun him for even daring to ask. 

“Not all the stuff,” you answered simply. 

“Okay,” he looked down, unable to meet your eyes, and you weren’t quite sure what to say at the moment either.

“Do you think-” he still wasn’t looking at you as he tried to finish his sentence, “do you think we…we…Do you?”

“Yes. Probably.” That got him to look up.

“Really?”

“Well not right now obviously-”

“Oh of course not,” he cut you off quickly. “But like…eventually? Do you see yourself being with me like that? Trusting me enough?”

“Yeah, I think so.” Now it was your turn to avoid his gaze. “Do you? See yourself trusting me and…whatever.”

He laughed a little. “Yeah, I do.”

“Cool.” You nodded quickly and cleared your throat. “So I actually had a question about this science problem.” You held up one of the worksheets you were sent home with.

“Oh no, you’re not switching the subject that easily.” He gave you a knowing look.

“No,” you faked offense. “Can a girl not ask her genius boyfriend a science-related question?”

“No,” he said simply. “You still owe me a kiss.”

You rolled your eyes, “I think we’re forgetting what really matters here.”

“Me?” Peter suggested.

“Homework.”

Next thing you knew, he had tackled you and had you pinned you on the floor. 

“Wait! No stop!” You yelled when you felt his hands creeping up your sides. You’d made the mistake of telling Peter you’re ticklish and boy had he been using it against you. 

He grinned with triumph. He knew he’d won but that didn’t mean he wasn’t gonna milk it. “Are you gonna give me kisses?” He leaned over you, letting his nose brush yours as some of his longer curls fell onto your face. 

“I really like these,” you whispered as your hand moved up to play with them. Your tone was more sincere now, completely forgetting the game you were playing and completely focusing on Peter’s hair. It was getting a little longer than usual and you adored it. 

“Yeah? I’ve been meaning to get it cut but I haven’t had a chance. Between school and Spider-Man-”

“No! Don’t cut them please,” you begged, eyes suddenly wide in horror at the fact that he was even thinking of chopping off his beautiful curls. 

“Really? Didn’t know you liked them that much.” He gave you a boyish grin.

“I treasure them as if they were my own,” you said sincerely making him shake with laughter. “So you wouldn’t even be cutting your hair Petey, you’d be cutting our hair.”

He laughed again, “Fine you win! I won’t be cutting it anytime soon, but I’m gonna need you to hold up on your kissespromise.”

“Yay! I love you!” You leaned up to kiss him where he hovered over you but he pulled away. You pouted slightly, howdare he give you such a hard time about kisses and then not accept them?!

“You love me?” He asked quietly. You froze. Why did you have to say that? Sure you two had been together for a while now and you’d known each other for even longer but…what if he didn’t feel the same? What if you had just ruined everything?

“Um…” You tried to move out from under him but he kept his arms locked around you. You were stuck, there was nothing to do other than talk. “Look Pete, I don’t want you to feel weird-”

“But do you love me?” He insisted. 

You sighed and turned your head. You might not be able to get away but that didn’t mean you had to look him in the face while you embarrassed yourself. “Yes.”

“Good.” He leaned down until your noses were touching again, “Because I love you too.”

Your heart skipped a beat in your chest. “Really?”

He chuckled softly, “Think I’ve loved you for a lot longer than you’ve loved me, Ace.” He leaned down and closed the distance between you, finally getting that kiss he’d been after you for. 

“Now do a pose!” Peter yelled over as he squinted through his camera. 

You rolled your eyes, feeling shy all of a sudden. “Peter, we’re in public, can we please stop now?”

The two of you were taking an after-school stroll through Central Park. It was autumn now and the scenery was absolutely gorgeous and Peter had demanded to take pictures of you the whole time. School had started back up almost a week ago and already the two of you were facing the heat of your senior year.

“Oh come on,” he jogged back to you and threw an arm around your shoulder. “Gotta get used to me showing you off Ace,” he pressed kissed the side of your head. “This what it’s going to be like when we go to school together.”

“We already go to school together.” You smirked at him. 

He rolled his eyes dramatically. “You know what I mean Ace,” he squeezed your shoulder softly. “I mean when we go to Columbia.”

You looked up at him with a smile so wide there was no way you could hide it. “I know,” you said softly. “I can’t wait.”

“Me either.” He smiled back. 

The two of you had discussed schools and where you’d be going. You spent a lot of your time during summer going overthe pros and cons of different universities and settled on going to Columbia. Of course, you weren’t just going for each other, but that was definitely a perk. 

It was perfect, really. Peter was planning on majoring in biophysics (a major you’d told him you thought was created just for him, two of his best subjects combined) and they had the perfect courses for that, not to mention their photography classes. He’d done a ton of research on them already. It was a hobby of his you’d learned about shortly after the two of you had gotten together, and you had to admit, he was really good. And he was only getting better.

And you were planning on majoring in Journalism, with a minor in English. You and Peter had a joke where he’d be making the groundbreaking scientific discoveries and you would be writing the award-winning articles about it. 

“I know you’re gonna make me sound smart,” he’d said smugly. “And sexy.”

You’d laughed at him. “Peter, how am I supposed to make you sound sexy?”

“I don't know, but as an amazing writer, that’s for you to figure out Ace.”

“I’m not a journalist yet.”

He winked. “But you will be.”

You bit your lip at the memory. You had this small fear (or silly as Peter had put it when you’d voiced it to him) that you wouldn’t get into Columbia. You weren’t even worried about Peter, you were pretty sure he’d get into every school he’d enrolled in. The boy was a genius after all. 

“Hey,” he said softly. He stopped walking, pulling you to a stop as well. Pulling his camera strap over his head, he stood in front of you and grabbed both of your hands. You looked down. 

“Uh uh,” he shook his head and tsked as he moved one of his hands to hold your chin between the knuckle of his index finger and his thumb. “Look at me,” he said and gently pulled your head up. “I know what that look means.”

You shook your head a little. “Means nothing. What do you mean?”

He gave you a sad smile. “I don’t like when you think like that y’know. I don’t want you upsetting yourself.” You didn’t answer so he continued. “Fine. It’s just up to me to distract you then.” He pulled away to grab one of your hands, intertwine your fingers together, and start walking again. He started to swing them back and forth dramatically. 

You giggled, which made him smile. His plan was already working. “Oh, by the way, I’m taking you out tonight.”

“What?” You asked. You didn’t remember making any plans for tonight.

He nodded. “Yeah, I’m gonna pick you up and we’re going to our spot. I was thinking around 10.” Your ‘spot’. The place where Peter had taken you on your first date, where you hadn’t known it was a date at first and had shown up in your pajamas. The two of you had kept going back since that initial night. Most of your summer nights (and sometimes early mornings and even afternoons) were spent up there, gazing at the stars, and talking about your futures. That place had grown to mean so much to the both of you and it held the sentiment of more than one of your firsts together. 

“Are you sure you won’t be busy, y’know with Spider-Man or school or something?” You looked up at him questioningly. Of course, you wanted to spend time together but you didn’t want him worrying about cheering you up so much that he slacked on his own stuff. 

He slapped a hand on his chest and feigned offense. “I’m sorry, what is this I’m hearing? You don’t wanna hang out with your boyfriend Ace?”

“No of course it’s not that,” you laughed and shoved him lightly. “I just don’t want you feeling like you need to spend time with me when you have so many other responsibilities.”

Peter laughed and shook his head. “No way. You can’t seriously think like that Ace.” He gave you a side-eye and sighed. “Maybe you really aren’t smart enough to get into Columbia.”

“Peter!” You shrieked and slapped his shoulder while he hunched over with laughter. You couldn’t help it, you joined him. 

Once he’d calmed down he straightened himself back up and looked at you with such adoration in his eyes, you nearly melted. He grabbed one of your hands and brought the knuckles up to his lips. “You know I’m only joking Ace, you’redefinitely getting in. In fact, they’re probably getting your place ready as we speak.”

You threw your head back and laughed. “Pete I haven’t even applied.”

“Exactly! You’re so amazing, you don’t even have to apply, they totally want you.” He wiggled his brows suggestively making you snort. You shoved him forward to continue your walk. “Enough about school for now,” you looked at him. “You said we’re going out tonight?”

“Oh yeah,” he grinned at you and you saw the nerdy part of him he tends to be a little insecure about. You’d told him multiple times it was your favorite part. You absolutely loved it when he started ranting about something he loved. “So there’s some new-” He shook his head quickly. “Actually, I’ll keep it a surprise and tell you when we’re there.”

You gaped at him, about to demand he tell you right now what he was about to say but before you could get the words outhe was positioning you infant of a tree bursting with different shades of orange, red, and yellow. New York really was beautiful in the fall. 

“I need some more pictures for my portfolio,” he said as he backed up a few steps. “Also, I’m loving today’s outfit.” He winked at you. 

You looked down. You weren’t wearing anything special, just a sweater, a pair of soft, baggy jeans, and some Converse.You were pulling down your sleeves when you realized what he meant. It was his sweater. You grinned, “Fine. A few more, and then you’re done.” You waved a finger at him. 

“Yeah, yeah.” He muttered and snapped a few pics. He pulled the camera away for a moment. “Stop looking so grumpy Ace, c’mere.” He walked toward you and grabbed your hand. He started leading you onto the grass which was completely blanketed in colored leaves. “I need you to lay down.”

“Okay, this is getting ridiculous.” You held your hands up. 

“Wait, no. Hear me out, Ace. I need to share my artistic vision.” You rolled your eyes but that didn’t stop him. “I’m gonna have you lay down in the leaves, look how bright and pretty they are! You lay down, let your hair down and spread it out a bit, and smile!” He punctuated his sentence with his own smile. 

You stared at him for a bit before grumbling, “You are so lucky I love you.” Sighing, you moved to lie on the ground in front of him while he grinned above you holding his camera eagerly. “Y’know the only reason I’m so okay with this isbecause this is your sweater.”

“S’alright,” he casually waved a hand as he checked something on his camera screen. “You can have it, it’s yours now.”

“What?”

“Well it’s been on the ground of Central Park, I sure as hell don’t want it.”

You burst into laughter. You didn’t even realize he was taking photos until you opened your eyes to see his camera lens in your face. After a few more clicks and him instructing you on some different poses, he leaned back and held out a hand. You ignored him and pushed yourself onto your feet, dusting off your clothes.

When you looked back at him, he was looking at you with a hurt expression and you almost felt bad for rejecting his hand. “You said you don’t want anything that’s been on the ground of Central Park.” You joked. 

Next thing you knew he had you in a hug, holding you tight. “I’ll always want you, Ace.”

He pulled away, “No matter what dirty part of New York you just came out of.” He tried to kiss your cheek but you shoved him away. 

“Absolutely not!” You yelled and started running away from him. 

“Wait Ace, come back.” You could hear him behind you laughing, as he chased you. You knew logically, with his superpowers and all, he could absolutely outrun you if he felt like it. And it seemed like he felt like it. 

After about a minute of chasing you, he started gaining speed. Next thing you knew, he had picked you up and he was dragging back to the ground with him. 

“Peter let me go,” you tried to shove him away, but it was no use, the boy had an iron grip. 

“No. We’re gonna be gross together.” He rolled around a bit in his spot for emphasis. 

You laughed at him. “You are such a weirdo.”

He grinned at you and this time succeeded in kissing your cheek. “Maybe. But I’m your weirdo.”

You rolled your eyes. “Thank god for that, I don’t think anyone else could handle you.”

He kissed your lips this time. “I don’t want anyone to handle me. Just want you.”

“Good, 'cause you’re stuck with me.”

“So what’s the special thing you couldn’t tell me about until now?”

You were currently lying on your back, with Peter’s arm under your head as the both of you gazed at the sky. 

“Well, it’s nothing crazy, but there’s a new star I wanted to show you.” He replied, which made your brows furrow in confusion. “New star?” You asked. “How the hell can there be a new star?” You gasped, “Oh my god did Orion knock a girl up?”

Peter laughed beside you, “No. No, okay so, there are these things called seasonal constellations.”

“Alright,” you nodded as if you had any idea what he was getting at. You had learned a lot about astronomy (or star stuffas you two had taken to calling it) since your first night here with Peter, but he still had some things on you. 

“Basically, stars are always in the sky, right? But we can’t see them because of the Sun. If it weren’t for the Sun, everyone would be able to see all the stars, all the time. But because the Earth is always moving around the Sun, the Sun’s position on the celestial sphere changes.”

You give him a confused look and he laughs before explaining some more. “So the Sun is on one side of the sky during summer, okay? During that time certain stars are super vibrant at night. And then when it’s winter, it’s on the oppositeside of the sky, giving some other stars and constellations their time to shine, and during this time, you can’t see the summer constellations as much, or at all.”

“Oh, so the Sun is kind of their reverse-spotlight.” It was starting to click for you. 

“Yeah exactly! The darker the sky is the more they shine.”

“Hmm,” you considered his words for a moment. “I dunno the Sun kinda sounds like an attention whore to me.” Peter laughed out loud but that didn’t stop you. “I’m serious! Who does she think she is? Stealing everyone’s spotlight but never dimming her own!” 

“Ace we’ve talked about this, come on.” He gave you a pointed look and you huffed. “What did we say?”

“Personifying the stars does nothing but hurt my own feelings,” you grumbled. 

“Because they don’t have any.” He finished for you. 

“Whatever.” You shoved him softly but they only made him pull you in closer. “So tell me about this new star.”

“Alright so, do you see that?” He leaned his head closer to yours and pointed up toward a bright star you hadn’t reallynoticed before. When you nodded he continued. “That’s the brightest star in the constellation of Andromeda. Andromeda is an autumn constellation.”

“Wait I know that name, we learned about this story in English. She’s from that old Greek myth with Perseus and Poseidon.”

Peter nodded. “Her mom was bragging she was more gorgeous than the sea nymphs, who didn’t like that and snitched to Poseidon. When he got mad, her father asked Zeus for advice and Zeus said the only way to get Poseidon to back off would be to sacrifice his daughter.”

You finished. “And then Perseus saw her, immediately fell in love, slayed the beast, and saved her. Then they got married.” You made little jazz hands, “Hooray for happy endings.”

He laughed before saying, “Wait, wasn’t she engaged to her uncle?”

“Yup. Perseus killed him too.” Peter made a weird face which made you giggle. “All Greek myths are kinda…off like that.”

“That’s one way to put it,” he mumbled. “But yeah, that’s her constellation. And Perseus,” he shuffled around so he couldpoint to another cluster of stars. “He’s right over there.

“Is his a seasonal constellation too?”

“No,” he shook his head. “Perseus is an all-year-round constellation. You can see him whenever. There are certain timeshe shines a little brighter, but for the most part, he’s always there?”

“But she isn’t?” You asked, referring to Andromeda.

Peter shook his head again. 

“Wow. All that and they don’t even get to spend their eternity together.” You said in a soft voice. 

“What do you mean? I thought it was romantic?” Peter replied.

“It is, in it’s own way. I just mean, she’s only around for a few months every year. And look how far apart they are, to us it seems like nothing, but up there, they’re probably galaxies away from each other.”

“Okay,” he nodded beside you while he considered your words. “But think of it like this, she’s actually up there all year round, she’s only visible to us a few months a year.”

“That’s true.” You smiled. It was sweet of him when he listened to your little stories and added his own thoughts, not just brushing you off. Your little saying from before, however, he had made up and constantly reminded you of ever since one night went a little too far; Peter had told you that actually, not all the stars in the sky were alive, in fact, a lot of them were dead but we just didn’t know because their lights were still shining for us (cue a long conversation of him explaining light years and regular years and how they affect what we see in the sky). That had made you start sobbing, the first time you’d cried in front of him actually. 

In his defense, Peter had handled it quite well. After his initial shock, he comforted you and tried to cheer you up by telling you to think of it as their final act, one last ‘look at me’ before they extinguished. That hadn’t really cheered you up but you had tried for him, after all, he couldn’t have known giant gas balls in the sky would hurt your feelings so much. You hadn’t known either. 

“As for the distance between them,” he continued. “I’m sure they have something figured out, like a tin can telephone. Or FaceTime.”

You laughed and pushed out of his hold, maneuvering yourself so you were looking down on him. 

“Hey Ace,” he whispered with a large smile on his face. 

“Y’know something Peter Parker? I really really love you.”

His smile grew wider. “Yeah?”

You nodded, your face lit up with its own cheesy grin. “Yeah.”

“Tell me again.”

“I’ll tell you however many times you want.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

If only it were that easy.

‘seasonal’ taglist: @keira-kaz2y5

#peter parker #writing #tom holland #andrew garfield #marvel #fanfic #peter parker fic #peter parker fluff #peter parker x you #peter x you #peter parker imagines #peter parker angst #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker writing #avengers x reader #the avengers #avengers #tom holland!peter parker x reader #mcu!spiderman x reader #mcu!peter parker #mcu!peter parker x reader #tom holland x reader #tom holland fluff #tom holland imagine #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland angst #fanfiction #tasm peter parker #tasm!peter x reader

[sithbvcky]

.02: SLEEP ALONE

As the adopted daughter of Tony Stark, your role becomes even more twisted and entangled when you meet and fall in love with one James Barnes. Unbeknownst to you, your world is about to flip upside down. Bucky x Stark!Reader Word Count: 2,146 Warnings: mentions of death, dead body *this was an anon request*

.01

Since that fateful meeting, you spent more and more time with James. You hadn’t booked a return flight from Bucharest, not until you found what you needed. You hadn’t pestered him anymore about his metal hand, which he had elaborated was actually his whole left arm. And he didn’t treat you any different after knowing of your powers. You simply started finding comfort in each others company. Daily coffee runs turned into shared dinners and discussions over tea. He had one more place he wanted to investigate that your mother might have stayed in and this time he conceded to your insistence on coming along. 

It was what looked to be an abandoned warehouse about an hour from the city. James had explained that some people used it as a halfway house on their way out of Bucharest. It’s roof was still intact and it was large and spacious, lots of places to hide if you didn’t wanna be found. 

“I’ll go first.” James said, which you appreciated. Even though you had what felt like the power of a nuclear bomb underneath your skin, this was unfamiliar territory and the last thing you needed to do was bring down a giant cement building. You could already see the headlines and the disappointed phone call you would be receiving from your father having to clean up your mess. 

You followed close behind James as he entered the warehouse. You weren’t expecting to find anyone here. Every other lead had been a dead end but you weren’t exactly ready to give up either. The main room of the warehouse was empty, nothing but abandoned tents and scraps left behind by whomever came before. You sifted amongst the trash with your foot, to see if there was anything of potential value. James wandered off into one of the adjacent rooms as you continued looking. A moment later, James returned looking as if he’d seen a ghost. 

“What’s the matter?” You asked, abandoning your search through the trash. 

“There’s a body in one of the rooms back there.” He started, looking down at his feet and shaking his head. “I didn’t look too closely at it but it seemed to be female.” His blue eyes met yours and they seemed to tell you “Don’t go in there.” or did you read his mind? 

You pushed by him and began marching towards the room he came from, 

“Y/N.” He called out for you, jogging to catch up with you. 

“I have to see. I have to know for sure.” You stated sternly and continued your momentum. When you entered the room, you saw a pile of blankets in the corner. James was right behind you, you could feel his soothing presence as you crept closer to the blankets. There was long brown hair sprouting from the top of the pile. Carefully you knelt down and slowly peeled back the blankets, revealing the still face of a woman. A woman who eerily looked like you. Same hair, same face. James stood a small distance behind you, giving you space but remaining close enough if you needed him. He was silent but observed your every move. 

As you looked at her, you noticed something that looked like the corner of a piece of paper sticking out from the jacket she was in. Carefully, you pulled it from the body and found your name written on it. With shaking breath, you unfolded the paper and read the handwritten note. 

“To my dearest Y/N, 

If you’re reading this that means he found me. I am so sorry for all the pain I caused you, I only ever wanted you to have a normal life. Last I heard you were adopted by a very important man who has given you everything I never could. I hope you are happy. All I ever wanted was for you to be happy, which is why all of this started. If he hasn’t already, he will try to come for you. He hates people like you but you are a miracle. A magnificent and beautiful creature with endless capabilities. Never forget that. 

 Please, protect yourself however you can. I will be watching over you, I love you. 

Your mother.” 

You paused for a moment after you finished reading, standing up to your feet. 

“Are you alright?” James asked softly. 

“Someone killed my mother because of me.” You said through gritted teeth, you could feel the power surging in your veins. In every fiber of your being. White hot and begging to be released. James took a step closer to you. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” 

“Sorry won’t bring her back. Sorry won’t change what I am.” You eyes were locked on your mothers body. 

“Y/N, it isn’t your fault. Don’t blame yourself for this.” James reached to place his flesh hand on your shoulder but you spun around pushing his hand away. 

“Don’t patronize me! Don’t try to understand how it feels to know you are the reason your mother is dead in a warehouse!” You shouted, red sparks emanated from your fingertips. Something was waking up inside you. 

“Y/N.” James called gently, as you fought the sobs trying to escape your throat. Let me out. The power within you cooed. Let me free. 

“Y/N, look at me.” James’ voice was stern but you barely heard him over the roar in your ears. You began to hyperventilate, as the power continued to grow within you looking for a release. 

“Y/N! Don’t!” 

James’s voice was the last thing you heard before a scream erupted from your lungs. A scream so anguished and broken. Filled to the brim with pain. Then everything went black. There were flashes as your mind flowed in and out of consciousness. Smoke and rubble. The feeling of strong arms wrapping around you. James’ muffled voice so close you could feel the vibration on your skin. 

When you came to, you were back in your apartment. James was sitting at the coffee table wringing his hands together. When he noticed you stirring he jumped to his feet to be at your side. 

“Y/N. Are you okay?” He asked, his eyes scanning your face anxiously. You brought a hand up to your head and winced, 

“I think so.” You mumbled. “What happened?” 

James looked down for a moment, 

“What do you remember?” He asked. 

“I remember finding my mother and her note and then feeling so much anger and pain and then nothing.” You answered, looking to him and seeing the worry in his eyes. 

“What did I do?” You asked urgently. He opened his mouth to speak but closed it again. 

“James, tell me, what did I do?” You insisted. 

“You brought half the building down on top of us. I pulled us out of the rubble.” He admitted. You let out a deep sigh, 

“Oh my god.” You winced, exactly what you didn’t want to have happen. 

“It’s alright, it was an old building anyways no one will think anything of it.” James assured. “What matters the most is that you’re ok.” He added. You began rubbing your forehead, racking your brain to put together those lost moments of time but it only started giving you a migraine so you gave up. 

“I’m sorry, James. I try so hard to keep it under control but-

“No, don’t.” He shook his head. “You don’t have to do that with me.” 

“Do what?” You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. 

“Don’t have to explain yourself. What you are.” He hesitated before pulling a crumpled piece of paper from his jacket pocket and handing it to you.

“I figured you would want to keep this.” He said, changing the subject. You took your mothers note from his hand and felt the tears welling in your eyes. James moved to stand up when you reached out and grabbed his hand, stopping him leaving. He looked down at you in surprise, after the events of today he assumed you’d be done. On your way back home and he’d go back to being alone. But something changed when you grabbed his hand, you felt it and you pushed that feeling through you to him. 

“Don’t go.” You whispered with a shaking voice. “I don’t like sleeping alone.” You felt vulnerable saying it but it was true.

“Neither do I.” He admitted but he made no move to join you in bed. “But I don’t think you’d want to share a bed with me.” He slid his hand from your grip and stepped back over to the coffee table. You sat up, propping yourself on your elbows as you watched him. 

“What are you talking about?” You asked, observing him intently. His body language had changed, he was stiff and you could feel him closing you out. 

“I’m not a good man, Y/N and if you knew everything I’d done.” His voice broke for a moment and he shook his head as if to collect himself. At this revelation you pushed yourself all the way out of bed and walked over to stand before him. Pulling his head up to look at you, 

“I may not know every thing about you, you’re right. But I know enough to know that you aren’t a bad man.” You said, gazing into his eyes. 

“No, I’m not. Not really.” He pulled his head away from your hold but you pulled it right back. 

“Listen to me.” You stated, holding his head between both of your hands. “I get to decide who I want in my life and who I want to share my bed. No one else. If you think I won’t still love you because you have skeletons in your closet, after I nearly killed us both. You are out of your mind.” 

His eyes widened at your accidental declaration. Love might’ve been strong but you felt something more than just affection for him. He didn’t try to pull away again so you released him, letting your hands fall to your hips. 

“If you want to leave because you don’t feel anything for me, I will understand. But don’t tell me it’s because you don’t think you’re worthy. That just isn’t true.” You swallowed hard, waiting for him to push past you and leave but he didn’t. He simply stood still. So you reached down and took his left hand, slowly slipping the glove off and throwing it the the floor. You held his metal hand in yours, inspecting it delicately 

“Is this why you don’t think you’re worthy?” You asked. James furrowed his brow and blinked as if recalling a painful memory. But he didn’t pull away. You interlocked you fingers with his, 

“Whatever you did before, whatever it is you don’t want to tell me. I don’t hold it against you. And I never will.” 

James blinked rapidly, holding back the tears you could see threatening to spill over. With your other hand you caressed his cheek and he leaned into your touch. 

“You saw the worst side of me and you stayed anyway. What makes you think I wouldn’t do the same for you, James.” You said, leading him to sit on the edge of the mattress. As you sat down, you helped him shrug off the jacket he’d been wearing all day. His mechanical arm was more exposed now, just a cotton sleeve protecting it from your eyes. 

“I’ve hurt a lot of people.” He spoke, his voice hoarse. He rolled up the sleeve to reveal more of his arm. “This arm has done nothing but cause pain until I met you.” He looked at you and the pain you saw in his eyes cut through you like a knife. Carefully, you placed your hand on the cool surface. 

“Did you have a choice? When you hurt them, did you have a choice?” You asked. 

“No.” James choked on the sadness in his throat. Once again you held his face in your hands, your faces inches from each other. 

“Than it isn’t your fault.” You started. “Whatever you’ve done, is not your fault, James.”

His head dropped in defeat and you held him close against your chest. Letting him cry if he needed or simply just feel the warmth of you. For a moment you sat there, holding him to you until he sat up. You flashed him a sympathetic smile, 

“Come, let’s lie down.” 

You both slid into bed, it was not quite big enough for two but you didn’t mind feeling the warmth of him next to you. In fact you curled yourself up against his chest and fell asleep almost instantly. James remained awake, watching you sleep until he couldn’t keep the exhaustion at bay any longer. That night was the most peaceful night either of you had had in a long time.

-------

tags:

@blackbirdwitch22

@queenashen

@annonymsworld

@ladyvenera

@laurxn-robinson

#bucky barnes #marvel fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction #sebastian stan #sebastianstan #buckybarnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky x you #stark!reader #stark!daughter #bucky fanfic #james bucky buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes