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oneangstymotherfucker · 1 year

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tw csa mention / k!nk mention

Something that gets to me about the anti mindset is that it doesn't seem to be able to account for the fact that we might be reading age-gap stuff from the younger person's perspective. Why do they always assume otherwise? (Of course it's okay if you do, but for this post im talking about the other side).

The truth is, sexuality cannot be completely severed from childhood experiences. From what I've read, most kinks and interests develop alongside the rest of our personality(ies). This is very normal.

It is also very normal to engage in 'pleasure seeking' as a child. Something feels nice on your body, so you keep doing it. I started when I was about six, and every therapist I've talked to has said that is normal.

The age during which you start understanding your bonds and relationships to other people is also very important, and since it affects your development and the rest of your life, going back to those ideas and looking at them can be very healing.

So it makes sense why anyone would be interested in metaphorically 'going back' to those times in their lives and exploring what they didn't have words or capacity to understand back then. Real children do not have the capacity to understand or cope with sex. They are not ready, and it would cause them harm. Maybe it did cause you harm. Fictional children are not real children. Fictional children are an extension of our own inner child, a way for us to process what we couldn't then now that we are safe and have more control of our lives. It doesn't undo the harm, but it can help you sort it out and move on from it.

So yeah, all of this is even more important if you have been hurt. I write about the ages 6-12 a lot because that's around the time I was hurt. It's not that im 'stuck there' or 'fetishizing' it (you can't 'fetishize' your own trauma) - I am doing work there. I am reclaiming it there. I am making sure the needy little 12 year old in me is safe and happy.

But as for me and myself- I was still afraid. I might always be. For a long time I couldn't even approach sexuality. When I finally did it was talking to old men online, trying to get them to believe I was much younger than I was, playing with them and seeing what they would say. That was what felt safe. The only 'part' of me that felt safe being sexual was the part that was still a kid.

I don't cope like that anymore. I found a way that I like better, that is more under my control and is way less risky to myself and the potential people i was talking to. And that is writing fiction!!!!

Through fiction I can set up places where all of me feels safe (even if it might not look safe to you or would not be safe in the real world!). I can create scenarios where I can work through my fears, provide comfort and safety, and make a good place for my kid self to figure things out (and yes, get off).

And it has been helping! We've been feeling safer and more confident since we started writing, and we've learned so much about ourselves and how to feel safe.

I studied psychology for four years. There isn't really terminology for a 'bad coping mechanism'. There is the idea of maladaptive coping mechanisms, but here's the thing- what makes a coping mechanism maladaptive is wether it causes more harm than good in the person's life on a case by case basis.

The idea that a random stranger thinks they have the authority over your life and your unique psychology to tell you that you are hurting yourself with your coping mechanisms is ridiculous. No stranger online knows - or should know - the details of your trauma or life. They have no say in what is good for you. If you are worried something might be hurting you or holding you back, that is for you and maybe a trusted professional to figure out. It is certianly not for some squicked teenager or anyone else online to dictate.

Also, sexuality and brains are really complicated. You don't need trauma (or to remember it) in order to enjoy something. You're allowed to ship any ship for any reason. Bonus points if one of the reasons is because it makes you happy, because you deserve to be happy!

All ships are just roleplays. All fics are just scenes. When I write I put up tags to let people know what's in the scene. I hold on good faith that they are reading the tags, and they that I am not tagging incorrectly. I give them my scene, and if they at any point don't like what I'm doing, they stop reading. It is really very simple!!!

Finally, if you do have sexual trauma, you don't ever have to 'sterilize' it or be 'pure' about it. It's okay to have leftover feelings and kinks and interests that might seem backwards or not make sense to other people. You don't have to conform to a bullshit 'good survivor' image of some saintly person who put all that behind them and avoids avoids avoids like a pure little virgin mary.

You can look at it if you want to. You can pull it apart with your hands, you can reclaim it and get off to it if you want to, you can share it with consenting others and let them get off to it too. That is all okay and good. That is just being human. You are okay.

#proship #tw csa mention #anti anti #anticensorship #pro fiction #k!nk mention #not me talking about writing when i havent updated me fics in like a month #kink mention

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gettin-bi-bi-bi · 2 years

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I have tried before the advice of internalised biphobia but sadly it doesn’t work on me, it only makes me feel worse and guilty. I feel that way whenever i try to “force myself” to accept myself i feel worse because I can’t, or if I do I can make it last long. The only queer friend i have never had any major issues on accepting his identity and that makes me feel more alone, esp because his identity is significantly “more queer” than mine (he’s trans, nonbinary and ace-spec and im a bisexual genderqueer woman).

I think one of my biggest worries about being bi is how that will affect my life. I don’t want my life to change significantly just because I happen to be bi. I have 2 queer classmates and they both post a lot about being queer, post pictures with flags, etc. I don’t want to do that, even though a part of me would love having a bi flag in my room for example, but I don’t want other people to think im weird or that being queer is my only personality trait. It doesn’t help that I have always been a quiet person, so i’m not exactly used to drawings attention to myself.

Thanks for your answers, they did make me feel better. I guess i still have a lot of work to do. I would have gone off anon but i’m too coward to do that atm ;-;

No queer person is "more queer" than another. Thinking that is in itself an aspect of internalised biphobia, the fact that you think you are somehow less queer than someone else because you give a hierarchy to different gender identities and sexuality - that's not healthy, neither for you nor the queer community as a whole.

And I know I said this before but I'm gonna say this again: just because you see some queer people that you know behave a certain way does NOT mean you have to do the same. You are your own person and whichever way you want to express your queerness is up to you. It's not necessary to "do it right" in order to be a "real queer". However, you also say you wish you could have a bi flag but you are too afraid of what people might think. You say you are afraid that people will think you are weird if they know you are queer. Though I understand where this fear is coming from, maybe try not to prove to the world how "normal" you are but start learning that there's nothing wrong about being "weird". That's literally what "queer" meant and we have reclaimed that word and taken pride in it to say "so what if we're weird? we like being weird!" to the world.

This idea of "making queerness your only personality trait" is ALSO internalised queerphobia. It's a trend I've seen pop up mostly on online queer spheres over the last few years that people say this especially about young queer people. It's queerphobic because a) it views queerness as something negative or something that should be kept quiet about and b) it assumes that these queer people are one-dimensional people. Just because someone posts about their queerness online and/or is very out & proud offline does not mean that is "their only personality trait". People who have a problem with this don't really have a problem with the "only" part - they have a problem with the queerness part of it.

I really don't know what else to say or to advise you except to reitterate that you are definitely not alone. Just because your one friend had it relatively easy in their coming out doesn't mean you are less valid or that you are the only person who struggles. This blog would not exist if it was just you who needed help. So please reach out to more resources, ideally offline if that's possible where you live. Or at the very least try talking to your queer friends and classmates. Like those two who post about it online - the fact they are posting a lot about it might very well be their way of overcoming their own struggles with being queer. Don't just assume that everything is easy peasy for them by what it looks like online.

Maddie

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thebonejunky · 2 years

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Still brimming with rage about the lesbian flag drama. This shit only ever happens online because these dork ass uwu bullshit chronically online gays never leave their houses or talk to anyone including their own community. But its still affecting Emily in real life and that's horrible. I don't give a shit how much of a "woke" fucking intellect hater you are. If you're LGBT its your responsibility to learn our history. Because its true when they say history repeats itself. That's exactly what's happening right now!

I don't care how gay you are. I don't care that you live for gaytwt and have a pfp of an anime character in front of a pride flag. You can still be homophobic. No matter how progressive you think you are it is homophobic to tell a lesbian she can't use her own word. Its homophobic to bully her into taking her shop down. Its homophobic to make low effort pastel versions of her flag. You are exactly what you hate. You are the cishet people telling LGBT's what we can and cant do. You are the cishet people shutting down LGBT businesses and kicking us out of our homes. You are the cishet people stealing our pride and trying to take it for themselves whether that be overpriced rainbow tshirts or straight pride parades. This is exactly what the homophobes want because while your bullying a fellow member of our community they're taking away our rights and hurting our futures and killing us.

Im the same age as all of these people creating this discourse, and yet i want to say grow the fuck up. Pick up a book on anarchism. Watch a Harvey Milk documentary. Look at the pictures of the very real gay people in the 80's holding fag signs. Talk to your local lesbian grandma and she'll tell you how embracing the word dyke changed her life. Because one day someone on the street will actually call you a slur. One day someone will jump you for kissing your partner on a bus. One day someone will look you up and down and kick you out of a public bathroom. And you'll look back and think "what the fuck was i doing? Why was i fighting my own people when i could have been fighting them?"

Emily isn't offending anyone by saying dyke you are offending our elders who fought tooth and nail to reclaim it and to get to call themselves that at all.

No one cares what you think is right and wrong! You don't get to decide! The entirety of the LGBT community isn't following you on twitter or scrolling through your tiktoks. Learn something, please.

#lesbian #lesbian flag #lgbt #gay #sunset lesbian flag #sapphic

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transalfredpennyworth · 10 months

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i love them i love them i love them!!!! i remember first starting wbg and being like aw :( sucks that there aren't any more inserts and ocs for this it would be so cool so seeing your silly little guys made my day!!!!! AND THEN YOUR RESPONSE MADE IT EVEN BETTER!!!

im SO excited to see em 👀 im already so attached you have no idEAAAAA they're soo cool thank you sosos much for sharing them with us!!

- imaginepostingonmain

AWW THANK YOU 💞💞 i think i have a few more wbg ocs if ur interested, i was mildly scared of posting about them but omg im so excited to talk about them!!!!!! OHHH and thinking about how eni's interactions with the rest of base will go is definitely interesting

you know what. rambling time. eni is me but braver with less of a fear of consequences but he still is me to some level, which leads to a pretty serious 'fall limp like a prey animal' response, like i could see him coming clean if he got caught doing something. he definitely would sell others down the river, hes kinda similar to mike in that way. its like. he can live the rest of his life feeling guilty over it as long as he has the rest of his life to live.

(this got. entirely too long. the rest of the post is under the cut)

its interesting to think about how enigma became how he is. yk, years of torture does tend to change a man. i imagine he flipped between defense mechanisms, fight to fawn to freeze to fight, ect ect.

the only reason he got out was because he fought and resisted and was stubborn and inconvenient and all of those things i try very hard not to be. he would be incredibly different from me and i think thats quite fun to think about.

thinking about identity is interesting too. i could see future iterations using different names and pronouns because my identity is a very fluid, changing thing. i could see enigma using different pronouns or perceiving his gender differently then eni or i do. he definitely got top surgery and im so jealous. also probably a few tattoos. oh! maybe he did that to kind of reclaim his body after the compound. i keep imagining him as more feminine then his other iterations for some reason?? i also imagine him with dirty blond hair and very thin. like unhealthily thin. i always tend to associate being super thin with being unhealthy and he is the very opposite of healthy

eni wouldnt have played woe.begone, no way. even if it brought back the most beloved person in my life, i have basic self preservation instincts, something that other characters seem to be significantly lacking in. i mean, i could kind of see enigma doing it but i dont see why he would bother, honestly. he has more of a stomach for pain and violence then i do, i think. its a weird flipflop between self destruction and self preservation, complicated trauma stuff, idk

i keep kind of thinking of me-me getting sent to the wbg universe with all knowledge of the podcast. it probably wouldnt help or improve anything (if i EVER hear the word propagation again im going to commit a crime) considering. you know. time travel. knowledge of the future is considered the norm. but it would be interesting and would affect my actions considerably

enigma rlly needs a partner of some kind because hes me and that means hes self-isolating because 'you cant be hurt if youre alone' bullshit. hes also scared of people. and relationships. and basically everything but he doesnt realize because hes either super dissociated or horrifying present every given moment. i keep torturing this poor guy can i at least give him like. a therapy animal or something. christ

WOAH i wrote considerably more then i intended to oopsies

#long post #wbg #w.bg #woe.begone #woe.begone podcast #wbg oc #apparently the way to get me to talk is to just ask about my ocs and then suddenly im writing 50 paragraphs #imaginepostingonmain #asks #answered

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relax-and-read-on · 2 years

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Sexualizing Konrad Curze you say?

*Crack knuckles*

Anon you are in for a world of trouble.

(I promess there will be horny ramble further down just skip the essay to the bullet point list if you want the Fun Time Stuff)

I love Konrad. So much. He's my blorbo. He's my fav to such a degree, I don't even want to fuck him myself, I want to get him the Perfect Partner. He's interesting and unique and provide amazing narrative.

The Problem that I have with sexualizing him is that... Either it turn extremely unhealthy (wich, fair enough, that's hot), or I need to write an entire essay and FIX HIM first before I can hope to get anywhere with him.

Im fascinated by complex character. I am also extremely sex positive, and LOVE a good healing/redemption story. If you mix all that together, you get to my fav type of story ever, wich go as follow: "Character is beaten and broken down, in horrible ways beyond imaginations. They are jagged and a mess. But slowly, they claw their way out of their hole of despair and trauma, bitter inch by bitter inch, and reclaim their agency, body autonomy, and the fact that they CAN love themself."

And like. Isn't Konrad the perfect candidate for that?!?

"That's all well and good Math, but how tf does that relate to sexy stuff??" I hear you say at your screen.

Well! I actually HC Konrad as having survived through CSA. I went into it a bit more deeply early on in this blog, and I might one day make a full analysis of the why I think that, and how it's still affecting him. Let's just say that, the signs are pretty clear.

CSA survivor can, if they want, have a healthy sex life. It just present itself with it's own challenge, unique to that person. Konrad, having incredibly complex and layered trauma, is something else all together. It's straight up fascinating to me to observe his sexuality, and how he can navigate all that. Both in a healthy "trying to get better" way and in a "If you Don't Question Yourself Than Nothing Will Hurt You" way.

That said- here is finally some! Complex nsfw hc of Konrad!!!

Sex with Konrad is. A challenge. He is unpredictable, as he has MANY triggers, and doesn't even know or realise half of them himself.

The neck is 100% off limit. No strangling, and its dangerous to even just kiss it. The hair should NEVER be pulled, but he might melt if you gently scratch it.

If triggered, he won't want to stop, no... He will just get very violent, but will want to continue. Can, and has, bitten chunk out of his partners body.

Only allow oral sex on himself if he REALLY trust the person. Will never perform oral sex on someone else, unless you are really into some serious mutilation.

Do actually like being the bottom. The feeling of being cared for is foreign but nice. Loosing control, however, make him feel weird af. On one hand, it's nice to finally let go. On the other, trauma.

Absolutely accept and is into a partner hurting him during sex. For him it's added spice, of course his partner wants to hurt him!!!

Does not want to cuddle or fall asleep after, unless he has build a GIANT amount of trust with his partner.

Is it pleasure, pain, or just the sensations that he associate with the only times people would willingly touch him? Better not think about that and ask to be slapped harder!!!

Will talk during sex. Not necessarily dirty talk, but similar-ish.

Age play is.... Very, VERY risky. On one hand, if properly done, it might actually help him process some shit, and he would be into that. On the other.... Further trauma~~

Restrain are. Well. He's an eel, and will have fun showing you that they are useless and may have a good time. But if you get him Actually Contained... There's a solid chance you will get the Night Haunter.

You don't fuck with the Night Haunter. He will be the one to tell you to stop and get tf out, and you listen if you value your organs. (Yes, Konrad can only refuse sex if his protective alter ego come out. I know.)

Does not masturbate himself, but would be lowkey curious to watch his partner pleasure themself.

3 way or group sex are dangerous. He might become violent if he's the focus too much, or if there is too many hands.

Once properly introduced to it, would LOVE structured BDSM, with proper scenario and aftercare.

A switch in general in dynamic. He does really need to learn how to not violently hurt his partner, he has huge problems understanding limits.

#warhammer 40k #warhammer #wh40k #primarch #konrad curze #primarch headcanon

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sofijaeger · 3 years

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hey, it's my first time doing any request so i'm little embarrassed but i'm excited too!! i love your writing so much<33 i had this in my mind for a while

Eren's s/o kissing his palms/hands or the spots where he usually bites his hand when he's about to transform

it can be anything(like drabble/headcanons etc. i hope you get me😭) once again I LOVE YOUR WRITING SM!!

that is so frickin adorable STOP I LOVE YOU AND YOUR BRAIN🥺 you can always request things to me, i’m not sure how soon i’ll get onto them but i will try my best and i love hearing from you!

okay i’m actually really proud of this one haha! the drabble will take place during the reclaim of shiganshina arc if that’s alright, and psa i scared myself writing a certain line because i had no clue how i was going to proceed after implying a major death LMAO. i think you’ll know what line i’m taking about but don’t worry nothing happens lol.

warnings: angst... IM SORRY🥲

words: 1.1k

kissing vow ~ eren x reader

Dawn quickly rose over the well-known territory. The part of land that was whispered upon for years ever since its fall, and a place strangely familiar to all your ears and hearts even if you hadn’t traveled there yourself. After the trip into the midnight wilderness you had arrived for a mission far greater than any other, and it was clear there were no visible signs of doubt from anyone.

Except for of course, the young boy with more pressure on his chest than anyone, one you cared for very dearly who’d call almost every shot with his actions. He was frightened beyond compare, so as the last few squads stood atop Wall Maria, urgently waiting for any signal, Eren was practically pissing himself right then and there. He had returned, devised a plan with all the leading commanders in just a few days, and was now preparing to risk his life for his homeland and people. There was no moment of rest for him or any of you. Besides the constant worry of succeeding the mission this very well may be the last time any of you see each other again.

You shout out his last name, once, twice, as he was too far in his own head to hear your first call and jog to him, gripping your delicate fingers over his shoulders. In the years you’ve spent together as scouts those small releases of tension-touching had become a clear sign you wanted each other’s attention, and you both caught onto the gesture quite quickly. Eren softened his eyes in your presence to notion just how focused he was on you. His subconscious would always allow his gaze to wander to you and what you had to say, he felt calmer that way.

“I already see you getting all inside your head, I thought talking about this on the journey here would be enough for you?” you whisper, leaning your head a little closer in attempt to understand what possibly was rumbling through his mind now.

“What if we lose”

“What?”

“I can’t bear to see us all lose! If we waited a little longer, a few more days, maybe we could have advised a plan that wouldn’t risk half the corps’ lives!” He tangled his hand in his hair, gripping the shaggy strands already coming loose from the stress he overdrove himself into. Your hands soften against the thick cloth of his cape, frowning at the few tears pricking his eyelids.

“Er, you’re more than welcome to cry to me later, just not now.” you chuckle.

“How are you so sure there’ll be a later y/n.”

You mouth opens before you can process your words, watching his cheek crane over to rest on the back of your hand that still lay against his collar. Here was humanity’s savior more worried than everyone minutes before call, but that you were perfectly fine with. This side to him was all the more proof that he was human, no matter what people labeled his being as.

“How am I sure? Bold of you to question my predictions Jaeger.” you exaggerate, placing your hands on your hips in a sneer. “I’m certain i’ll come back alive, and why? Because your protecting me with ever passionate fiber in your body, just as you will everyone else. You’re fighting for our justice against these monsters, the ones with no mind or cause. You have a cause to fight Eren and you have a heart too, a damn big one if I do say so myself. It’s the reason we support you with in the entireties of our own.”

With that, you intertwine your fingers around his right thumb, softly calloused to the touch he notes time and time again, and place it in front of your mouth to kiss. His body tenses at the feeling, but his eyes widen when he realizes where exactly you’ve placed it, your trust in him, where you’ve unknowingly hinted your years of growing affection for the boy in the heap of a split second.

Over the bitten scars littered down his radial.

He looks at you in confirmation of what he thinks it meant, and smiles into those fierce doe eyes of yours. A genuine emotion he hasn’t felt in months through grieving and loss, but could so easily melt into again with you.

So yes, he held a dangerous power, but it was all his. Something his true self was a part of that no one should ever neglect, and he found all the support he needed within the soldier right before him.

“Knock em dead Ren, do your best for everyone who’s lived and who will continue to. None of us would be standing here without you, so your presence alone is precious to us...

...We all believe in you, I believe in you.”

You guide his palm to your cheek, nuzzling into its claminess. As he engraves the plush feeling of his fingertips to your skin, a green smoke signal is fired.

And even when Eren was positive not everyone could be saved, he was reminded the ones following the biggest goals in the end would persevere and care for each other just as you had for him. He was confident you’d all succeed that way.

Like Armin now does over Commander Erwin,

Or little Gabi rather than Sasha, no matter what unjust brainwashing she believes.

But him or you, who would risk their own life caring for whom they loved most?

That was one thing he never wanted to find out.

Now he slouches in a rotten, stoned cell, contemplating what could’ve changed if only he had tried a little harder, or had this all been fate from the start?

His hand resting in his lap catches his glance, peering down at the bite marks still evident across his thumb. Surely if the marks he made as a teen persisted your kiss would too.

He slowly brings his hand up, cautious of any guards mistaking the move for another transformation, and presses his lips against the same spot you had. He closes his eyes at the warmth, sensing it was still emitting from your own lingering touch years ago. Unfortunately there had been no more little kisses, subtle clues of affection from either of you ever since. He liked those hints he really did, but now he was sure you stood a few floors above him, devising a plan to put an end to his scheme rather than caring over his emotions.

Weren’t you the one who told him to keep going though?

Perhaps if he had told you his motives beforehand rather than keeping them inside. How he appreciated every act of tenderness you gave him, more than anything he’s experienced before, how all this time he’s fought on this battlefield people called the world, for you and everyone else. Maybe then you’d stay out of his way and let him succeed, but his actions had no time for feelings or explanations. The freedom he desperately searched for in the future held no care for the past.

Yet he could never lie to himself and think you didn’t love him still, even after all this time. And Eren couldn’t deny anything about his own feelings for you, it’s what kept him going.

#JUST BUSTED THIS SHIT OUT MAN FEELING PROUD #sofi drabs #eren x reader #sofi time #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #anime #eren yeager #eren jaeger #eren aot #snk eren #eren x you #fanfic #eren jaeger x reader #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager x you #eren jaeger x you

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lover-of-trash-and-people · 3 years

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bittersweet netflix shadow and bone finale (s1 e8) rewatch; accoutrement: white wine with ice cubes in it (no YOU'RE a mom drink shh)

my wine's like fruity I love her

light and darkness title card we love to see it

Inej looking at Alina before she goes below deck to hide <3

okay that 'what can you really do on your own' was like not fun that shit hurted

okay but Jesper's 'not enough'? <3

oh no my baby Zoya's first inkling that Darkles does not really care

omg Helnik just appeared and I remembered how much heartbreak I have to face in this episode

gods I love Danielle as Nina so so much

'this can't be it' said she with her pleading smile with downturned eyebrows MA'AM I-

don't break my dumb little heart

I might hate Calahan's little accent but they're making me tear up

oh gods I literally cannot keep a hold on myself when Dani's accent bleeds through with full force, it's like she comes more alive or smth

'I will keep you warm' SIR WHAT-

I am surprised they showed a leaning in for a kiss so soon but I'm not mad about it

her little eyebrow twitch at 'what are waffles'

when that rando said 'i hunt slavers now' a dread settled into me because I knew what was about to go down

Matthias looking somberly at the stuffed wolf's head </3

I am so incredibly entranced by this exchange between Fedyor and Nina and what it represents, it's very interesting that they pushed up their storyline to match with the timeline

damn it's kind of jarring to be back in the Fold

'REMEMBER WHO'S DRIVING'??!!!! *you better stop* meme, *i am, disgusted* meme, *oh wow, oh wow* meme

Mal you fucking idiot you could never take the crows by surprise

the music rising as Kaz starts explaining his thought process, fucking perfection

haha Mal bitchass Inej caught you

'Because if he isn't with Kirigan's crew, he's with ours' WHEN I TELL YOU I SCREAMED

'And why would we destroy the Fold? It's the greatest weapon we've got' valid point at the moment but you know I don't necessarily agree with your methods

the use of the light tunnel in the show instead of Alina just being a super flashlight in the books is quite an interesting addition as well

is this an inappropriate time to point out how pretty Ben Barnes is

okay I kind of love the depiction of the shadow powers okay sue me

'they are traitors who tried to kill you' why are you suddenly making valid points despite having kind of committed low scale genocide

'i never said I was smart' YES MAL BE THE VOICE OF HIMBOS EVERYWHERE

Kaz's face going from 'can you believe this idiot' at Mal to 'fuck me I'm gonna do the same thing aren't I' at Inej

'For who would oppose us now?' *himbo romantic rival appears out of nowhere and shoots at him* god I love this show

him standing calmly in his ridiculous all black attire after nodding at his soldier to stop the himbo in his tracks, i fucking can't

could she summon light without the Darkling making her after he put the collar on her until the uhm moment in the books? idts but in the show she can hmm

'only because I'm not in the game' you tell him Jesper

not me snickering at 'you'll be seen not as a saviour, but as a heretic' LMFAO

'Shame. I'll have to give that speech again now.' THIS SHOW IS A FUCKING COMEDY AND YOU CAN'T PROVE ME WRONG

YES LET'S FUCKING GO SULI SOLIDARITY

Darkles casually whipping the Cut out like a shuriken or a throwing knife at Jesper because he shot at him lmao I can't

INEJ FUCKING GHAFA STABBED ONE THE OLDEST AND MOST POWERFUL PEOPLE IN THAT WORLD AND THAT IS VERY TELLING OF HER POWER

that moment where you actually think that affected him despite having read the books and watched the show

and then he has to go and fucking say 'it will take more than this' and I can't be help but be a little bit impressed at this old fool's resilience

throwback to when he said 'the king is a child' sir you make some valid points sometimes and it does make it difficult to hate you

I would just like to inform everyone that it is currently 6:09 am IST and I am sipping my second mug of wine while watching netflix sab for the second time instead of doing my three papers that are due tomorrow

I'm sorry but Inej jumping to check on Zoya after she gets knocked over by the volcra? first class display of solidarity and sisterhood as well as Inej's inherent kindness

Kaz jumping in front of a FUCKING VOLCRA AND STABBING IT WITH HIS CANE to save Inej, you best believe love is true, kids

god the volcra are so ugly and gross, they did such a good job with them

they kind of remind me of these creatures (I think they might have been called Hollows or smth) from the Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children movie

STAG VISION TIME

despite my dislike for the callous nature with which the stag plotline was handled, I kind of dig the stag vision scene

'It's just me and you now, Alina. And we're all we need, anyway.' I actually feel bad for this old fool simping for this wonderful gorgeous powerful woman despite lying to her and manipulating her and exploiting her power

okay 'I never needed you' *stabs the bone fragment out of his hand* beautiful power move I fucking love you so so much

alright ben looking like ✨ that✨ not only in physical pain but also emotional pain at what the Darkling clearly considers another betrayal from this girl he wants to give the world and maybe? loves? maybe? or at least has feelings for makes my fucking heart hurt while simultaneously soar at Alina taking back control and reclaiming her power as her own and stepping into her own

'how do you claim such power' okay could have had better dialogue there writers

the fucking score lifting as she says 'you cannot claim what was not given to you' good people my heart is full

one day I'll talk about my defense of the chosen one trope because god damn I kind of love it

hmm I wonder was that brief hesitation that we saw on Alina's face due to her thinking about the 'you chose to betray our people' comment or the 'i was trying to save us' comment because that will define some of her actions in the later seasons (hopefully god if we get some, I honestly don't know what with this stupid brownface debacle)

I'm not saying talking about brownface and pointing out that it is wrong (for further context, I am actually brown) and harmful is stupid btw I'm talking about the incidents involving brownface in question

I don't wanna talk about this anymore but I might feel like I need to and end up posting about it idk

goodness Ivan actually believing in this cause makes me so sad because he too has been victimized by the system that ostracizes Grisha and he has every right to feel the way that he does

Ben actually fighting in that ridiculously heavy cloak and kefta when he's about to turn 40 this year makes me super impressed because I as a 19 year old sometimes wake up with muscle pulls after weeks of inactivity it's weird idk

also I understand that this Mal Darkling fight is completely fanservice and serves nearly no purpose to the plot in general but like I? love it?

'I don't have to kill you Darkling. Your past will do it for me' YES HIMBO GO OFF YOU TELL THAT OLD MAN GODS THAT WAS SEXY AS FUCK

maybe it's because I know Darkles will survive and will come out of it more powerful but I can't get myself to feel bad for him at the moment

Inej and Mal tearing up at Alina's condition made me almost feel something despite it being super obvious she was gonna be fine and save their asses at the last moment

HER POWER

a solitary Kaz in spotted on the western side of the newly expanded fold in his signature all black emo boy look

okay but the crows with zoya and malina is such an adorable team? I literally love them so much?

INEJ'S FUCKING SMILE AT ALINA GIVING HER THE DAGGER AND KAZ LOOKING AT HER AGSGSGSHSJSJSK MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE

SHE KNOWS JUST WHAT TO NAME IT WELL GIRLIE I KNOW IT TOO AND MY FUCKING HEART IS LITERALLY GONNA BURST

okay I know they had one interaction but Mal and Jesper would be besties in another universe

Kaz glaring at Jesper when he answers ''course not' to Alina's 'will you still be trying to kidnap me?' tell me one fucking adaptation that got the dynamics between characters this perfectly

okay why do I love that Alina kept the jewellery as maybe a small nod to she has the wits to, um, you know, I don't wanna say steal, but, um, yeah, steal it because she knew she would need money to survive on the run

oh Jessie I love you so much I wish you hadn't said those things on you ig story about the brownface

it's like every single celeb I grow attached to god's like nope that one is going to do or say something problematic (hey btw im not reassigning blame to god for stuff people have done out of their own free will, 'twas a joke)

AAAAAAAH them saying 'the deal is the deal' in the show even though they didn't have to but like they did and I love them for it

Inej literally not being able to not stare at Kaz's face and smile after this <3

'I didn't expect it to burn at all. But it can be destroyed in the end. Just like him' babe you're not wrong but like um just you wait

god Mal being on supportive boyfie mode is well, absolutely adorable, obviously, but I wish we got to see more of him as a person outside of his attachment to Alina

kaz my little demjin I wish you hadn't have had to suffer so much to meet the crows and find your calling

fastforwarding Zoya's arc is also an interesting choice to me

I wish the hug hadn't been done though, it didn't feel earned

maybe Alina awkwardly and half-heartedly (remember, at this point the alliance is fresh and they still don't entirely trust each other) reached for a hug and Zoya avoided her? and then the rest of Zoya's lines followed? that would have made more sense to me at least

I love Sujaya as well, she brought life into Zoya with whatever little screentime and scraps of writing she got

inej asking kaz 'what's your angle?' beep bop bleep morp I sense another incoming embarrassing love confession

'but we do need you' *stares at her face intensely* 'I need you' ah look at the clock, look's like it's time to screech and flap your arms like you're a volcra because you're incapable of containing your emotions

NO YOU CAN'T GO DIRECTLY FROM KANEJ PROGRESS TO HELNIK BREAKUP (TEMPORARY, MIND YOU)

helnik my loves you don't deserve this I'm so sorry for both of you

Matthias fucking smiling ruefully while he says 'this was... just a cruel joke all along' THIS IS NOT FUCKING OKAY

omg hellgate

AAAAAAAAH NINA IS ON THE SAME FRAME AS THE OG CROWS I CAN'T HANDLE THIS

CAMERA PAN FROM KAZ SAYING 'JUST HOW THIS ALL STARTED... WE'RE GONNA NEED A HEARTRENDED' TO NINA OVERHEARING HIM AND LOOKING OVER?????!!!!!! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING THIS TO ME?!

Nina genuinely being curious as to the status of the sun saint because she obviously still cares

Also, 'But she is a Saint' okay Kaz trying to earn brownie points you have succeeded

DID THAT SAILOR JUST SAY 'GOED MORGEN FENTOMEN' TO MALINA BECAUSE I AM NOT OKAY WITH THEM JUST THROWING THAT IN MY FACE ALL OF A SUDDEN

gods I know I'll probably see them again but my heart is full of sorrow as my eyes drink in the sight of my crows for the last time for a while

I know people were annoyed at the meadow flashbacks but guess what? as a darklina, I loved them

'now that the Darkling is dead' could have phrased that a little differently my dudes that line needed to hold more weight

am I glad that they showed Darkles in this state with his nichevo'ya as a tasty little cliffhanger despite not being entirely true to the source material? maybe but only because Ben Barnes saying 'follow' and the nichevo'ya doing exactly so sent a chill down my spine

well, that's it for now, I'll have to move on I guess, get back to my real life which I'm obviously not ready to do

thank you to whoever actually read these things

I probably should have just made reactions or commentary videos instead but I'm lazy

my tumblr will probably go into inactivity once more as I emerge from my stint in the grishaverse

it was quite short (less than 2 months), considering the length of my other obsessions but it was definitely more intense than the other ones

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autismserenity · 4 years

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Hi! I have atypical autism and I’m having trouble at work. I feel like no work place is working out for me because of my diagnosis. I’m uncomfortable around my colleagues, I’m quiet, I don’t know when to speak or what to say etc. I’m sad, mad and frustrated that this ruins every work place for me and I don’t know what job would fit me. I’ve never told my bosses that I have atypical autism and I don’t want to do it either. I want advice on what I should do

this is a great question! I didn’t know what atypical autism was, but I googled it and it sounds like they came up with this because they can’t call it asperger’s anymore? “a subthreshold diagnosis, presenting with some symptoms of autism but insufficient to meet criteria for a diagnosis of childhood autism (or autistic disorder). Alternatively, atypical autism can be diagnosed when there is a late onset of symptomatology.” Aka DDNOS, apparently. From my perspective, it doesn’t sound different from any other autistic experience. FWIW. I think they tend to base their diagnostic labels more on how we seem from the outside than what our experiences really are. just my onion It sounds like you’re struggling with social anxiety, in that special vicious-cycle kind of way where not knowing how to interact with people makes you more anxious, and that makes it harder to interact with them, which makes you more anxious....? The nice thing about vicious cycles is that you only have to knock out part of the cycle to make the whole thing fall apart. Like: if you didn’t feel anxious about not knowing when to speak or what to say, it would be easier to figure out when to speak or what to say. Which, in turn, would give you less reason to feel anxious about it, et cetera. Or, if you knew what to say to them and how to hit it off, you would have fewer triggers for your anxiety, which would then make it easier to.... you get the idea. There are a lot of things that help with social anxiety. I am going to give a shout-out to medication, first of all. There are a lot of life hacks and therapeutic techniques that help a lot. And for yeeeeeaaaars, I didn’t realize that I really had anxiety, and also, thought that I “should” see if I could manage anything myself before “resorting to” meds. Turns out, medication saves me a TON of spoons, which I was previously using to “manage” depression, anxiety, and ADHD. You would not BELIEVE how much more energy and just general functionality I had when I finally got my meds right. OMFG. It can be a pain in the ass to find the right medication, especially if it means first having to find a medical practitioner that can help you and then having to explain the situation. Sometimes you find something that helps you right away. Sometimes you have to try different things to find something that works well enough. Sometimes you get the fun of “doesn’t work for me AND has bad side effects for me.” (OTOH, when looking at side effects, always remember that you might not get any of the side effects.) IMHO, the hardest part of finding the right medication is that a lot of practitioners don’t know how to track whether it’s helping you or not. Or whether it’s helping ENOUGH. Like: I got on anxiety meds that were starting to help, but which were making my ADHD meds not work. I tried a bunch of other things, and finally got Vyvanse to work for my ADHD. But I managed to FORGET that my anxiety meds weren’t doing anything, for a full year, until things got really bad and I was like “wait a minute... these should be helping????” And I did some research, accidentally found a competent psychiatrist, and found that Cymbalta worked for me... but even then, if I hadn’t found decent tools for assessing if it was enough, I would’ve stopped at like half the dose I actually needed to be on. This post is gonna be long as it is, so I’m gonna reblog to add different tools you can use to gauge what’s working, and which will help medical professionals understand what you’re experiencing. (Because tbh, they’re often just plain ignorant about this shit.) You do not necessarily have to go to a psychiatrist to get medication for anxiety, social or otherwise! My partner’s OBGYN prescribed him depression meds. My family doctor was willing to prescribe stuff for depression and anxiety, but only if it was something that didn’t potentially interact with ADHD meds. My chosen brother’s doctor was asking EVERYBODY, after the 2016 election, how they were doing and if they needed depression/anxiety meds. (And they’re in North Carolina!) He had never really thought about it before, and in fact, when he started taking them, his social anxiety got so much better that he was doing shit like going back into the store to tell them they’d given him too much change. He was the one who got me to think about taking them. He had a little kid, and he was like, "I’m doing this for my family.” Ok, medication aside: Some kinds of therapy are really good for figuring out how to interact with people. I’ve been learning a lot about different modalities, and I would recommend finding someone who does what’s called “relational therapy” or “relational-cultural therapy.” Basically, relational therapy is ALL about learning how to interact with people and have better relationships of all kinds. It’s very connected with issues of marginalization: people who are into relational therapy learn about how marginalization, and abuse, affect us and our relationships. Like, how we can internalize a ton of shame, just from being autistic and being devalued by the people around us. Even just from existing in a world that doesn’t value or understand how we communicate, and how we experience things. And it’s really good for identifying that stuff, healing from the struggles of trying to interact with people, and learning how to relate to people in a way that works for you. I found an organization that explains it pretty well (”Are you anxious when it comes to social situations like the workplace?... If we are depressed or anxious, inevitably it can be traced back to tension or breakdowns in relationships, or an inability to connect”), has a blog post in the sidebar called “Signs of Aspergers In Adults - Sound Familiar?” and apparently does therapy globally via Skype. I have never used them, I don’t know anything about them, I just googled “relational therapy” “online therapist.” (Shockingly, tho, that blog post not only links to one by an actually autistic person, but is very positive about autistic traits. I’m impressed so far. And I’m sure there are other options out there, too.) Lastly (as far as Things That I Personally Know Work go), I’ve gotten a LOT of recovery around social anxiety, and learned how to build relationships at work, from 12-step programs. The reason it works for that, as far as I can tell, is: • It’s a peer-led model, where everyone is equal. (this was huge to me, because I really struggled for a long time with feeling like everyone knew better than I did and had more of a right to talk about anything than I did, and therapy was a tough way to deal with things at that point because I saw the therapist as A Professional who’s In Charge.) • There’s a lot of emphasis on the fact that the newcomer who just walked into the room has as much of a right to give input in a business meeting, or to volunteer to help out with something that doesn’t require specific experience, or to share what’s going on with them, as anybody else. • Everybody there has gone through the same stuff as you, and anybody who’s helping you is showing you what worked for them, not what they were taught would work for people. That can be a pretty big difference, especially in terms of being able to relate to them and share personal things with them. • Working the steps involves a lot of writing about your fears and resentments, and looking at, basically, what has and hasn’t worked for you, and why it hasn’t worked. Really, what you're doing there is seeing where you can reclaim your power. And then you deal with a lot of shame, and get to discover how much you’re like other people, and how much you’re equal to other people, and that you’re a good addition to the world. • You also connect with your intuition, when working the steps, and develop a better sense of what’s intuition and what’s fear/anxiety. That, and sharing in meetings, REALLY helped me get a sense of what to say to people and get comfortable saying things. (A lot of people shorthand what I’m calling “intuition” as “god,” but it’s very much supposed to be a nonreligious idea of “god.” and IME, it’s basically your intuition, whether your belief system says that’s god talking to you, or a psychological thing, or a mystical force, or what.) Plus, 12-step stuff is free, which I’m very much in favor of lol. And most 12-step orgs have phone meetings and online meetings, so you don’t even have to go in person if that’s a barrier. (and in a phone meeting, they might not even know you’re there!) The tricky part can be figuring out which 12-step groups are good in your area and what might work for you. Because they range from Alcoholics Anonymous to, like... what’s the most obscure one I can think of? ARTS Anonymous, I guess. (it’s for artists who are stuck, it’s not saying art is an addiction) But if you wanted to try 12-step for this, I would say that Emotions Anonymous is really good for dealing with all sorts of emotional and mental health stuff. (and holy shit, they have an app????) Adult Children of Alcoholic and Dysfunctional Families has, iirc, a good book, (as well as all the meetings and whatnot) and most people probably qualify for that. If you have any experience with sexual assault, abuse, harassment, or being cheated on, COSA is good, and you end up working on all your other relationships and emotional stuff along the way.

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jeannereames · 5 years

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What kind of man do you think Hephaestion was? I always imagined that he was very similar to Alexander, given how close they were and how much Alexander trusted him, I always thought they must have been very similar people . But who knows, maybe it was an ‘opposites attract’ sort of thing, as we know so little about Hephaestion and the kind of person he was. Also, do you believe that Hephaestion reciprocated the deep affection and attachment Alexander had for him?

Answering the second part first, it’s hard to know for sure as we don’t have anything we’re certain Hephaistion wrote. There’s a letter from him to Olympias, recorded in Diodorus, but it’s problematic. I can’t talk about the work I’m doing on it because, well, I’m working on it. 😉 I don’t want to show my cards yet.

But in any case, I think the letter is suggestive that Hephaistion saw himself and Alexander as a unit against the enemy of either one (even Alexander’s own mother). So if the letter is at all genuine, yes, I’d say he was very loyal to Alexander. As loyal as Alexander to him? That’s impossible to say. He died first, so we have Alexander’s reaction only.

I’d caution that, when people have been friends as long as they were (assuming they’d met as boys, at least by Mieza), their relationship would have gone through phases. Long-term friendships, just like long-term marriages, have ups-and-downs. We may get occasional glimpses of this in the historical record (such as the quarrel between Hephaistion and Krateros in India, and Alexander’s reaction), but we just have NO idea what they thought about each other throughout a 19+-year friendship.

Yet I tend to take their mutual devotion at face value, understanding there were probably periods when Hephaistion was FURIOUS with Alexander (and the reverse). Being angry is a long way from being indifferent, of course. 😊

As for Hephaistion’s personality, and I’ll address here the historical man, not my fictional Hephaistion (as I assume that’s what you’re asking). What we know is piecemeal, and sometimes contradictory…unless you remember that human beings are rarely consistent. We like to THINK we are, but psychological experiments have shown that we’re more likely to respond to circumstance, then try to justify our actions to ourselves later. (People who always act according to internal principle are quite rare.)

But what I’ve been able to glean about Hephaistion’s personality from my own research is as follows:

1) He’s described as charming when he wanted to be, and at least some of his assignments involved diplomatic posts that might have involved a need to sweet-talk people. If he was also physically attractive, it wouldn’t have hurt. Another thing we may not like to admit, but has been shown to be true: attractive (and tall) people command more immediate attention and authority. There are exceptions (Alexander himself would be one), but on average, it holds true.

2) Combined with the above, he’s described as exercising his influence over Alexander in such a way that it seemed “granted by the king” rather than “claimed by himself.” E.g., he wasn’t an arrogant little shit. *grin* But he’s also said to have been the one most free to advise (and upbraid) the king.

3) In contrast to the above, he had a couple recorded personal quarrels, although I’d like to point out that ALL these guys were quarrelsome, and Hephaistion’s quarrelsomeness tends to be exaggerated, compared to, say, Krateros’s. But as he advanced, politically, THAT’S when we see these emerge. The more power one acquires, the more one attracts competition, especially in a society without clear hierarchy, such as ancient Macedonia. Hierarchy existed, but was at the king’s pleasure, not formally encoded. Theoretically, all Hetairoi were equal; pragmatically, they certainly weren’t. Combined with differences off the field vs. on it, in terms of authority, that could raise hurt feelings involving personal honor (timē), which in ancient Greece, was (literally) more important than life itself. Better to die reclaiming timē than live without it. So as Hephaistion’s importance rose, of course he’d attract more rivalry.

4) Last, despite all the above, he doesn’t seem to have been as ego aggressive as some of his contemporaries (such as Krateros, or Philotas). While Alexander’s remark to him in India that amounts to, “I made you,” was probably unduly harsh and spoken in anger, there’s a leeettle bit of truth to it, in that I wonder if Hephaistion would have cared to rise as high as he did, had he not been Alexander’s friend and wanted to support the king. This is a bit different from the reading that he was less talented, or an also-ran. But not everybody is ambitious that way.

I have this hunch, from a broad reading, that Hephaistion went to Asia for love of Alexander, not because he was personally ambitious himself. Bette Midler’s “Wind beneath My Wings” has always seemed like a pretty good description of what Hephaistion was to Alexander. (Don’t kill me for evoking cheesy pop songs, please!) That makes him a bit different from the rest of the lot, and perhaps somewhat untouchable in Alexander’s trust. Might, in fact, BE the reason for Alexander’s trust.

But these things aside, we don’t know much of what he was like, personality wise. These are bits and pieces that I used, when I constructed my fictional Hephaistion (although of course, I was working with the boy, not the man he’ll become, although I tried to seed hints of it). My Hephaistion isn’t quite what he’ll be, but he’s on the way there, just like Alexander. They’re rough on the edges yet. As were we all, at their ages.

A last comment on the “opposites attract”…they do, but as the saying goes, they don’t always wear well. Rather, I think couples benefit for HOW they’re “opposite.” If they’re too opposite in point of view, especially world view, that really doesn’t wear well in the long run. Matching ideologies are very important, or at least matching in most ways. No two people will agree on EVERYthing, but it’s key that they (mostly) look out in the same direction. I think it’s also very important, IME, that couples have a MISSION together. It needn’t be big or fancy (like conquering Asia!), but there needs to be something they share together, that defines them as a couple. Not who am I and you, but who are WE? Couples who can’t answer that? Usually not a long shelf-life there.

But otherwise, I think it’s valuable for couples to have slightly different personalities, so for instance, for one to be the “talker” and the other listens more (guess who that was, with Alexander in the mix). Perhaps for one to be more assertive, fiery, the other more relaxed and easy-going. So again, when I was building my fictional characters, I gave some thought to that. In the book, I tend to frame it in ancient humor or elemental theory. So Alexander is described as fire (sometimes air, sometimes water), while Hephaistion is earth (sometimes water, sometimes air). Alexander has an “excess” of blood and yellow bile, while Hephaistion has an “excess” of black bile and phlegm. It’s both era-appropriate, but also useful for thinking about how they compliment each other. All four humors needed to be in balance in a person, so each has “too much” of what the other needs more of.

#Hephaistion #Hephaestion #Alexander the Great #Alexanderthegreat #ATG #Classics #Dancing with the Lion #DTWL #Alexander x Hephaistion #alexander x hephaestion #ancient Macedonia #classical friendships #Humor theory #tagamemnon #asks #ancient medicine

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universal-gay · 4 years

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heyy, @goodbyevanny tagged me in this get to you know game and im 🥰 about it

Rules: Answer 17 questions & tag 17 people you want to get to know better

Nickname: all variations of “Hanna Banana” are pretty popular, my best friend’s mom literally just calls me “Banana” most of the time

Zodiac Sign: Aries 😎 my birthday is actually Friday, thanks covid for ruining it 🤘🏻

Height: 5’6

Hogwarts house: Im a Huffleclaw but typically go with Hufflepuff

Last thing I googled: golden tit; was playing Scattergories and debating the usage of “Tit” for “Type of Bird” (the letter was T)

Song stuck in my head: my brain jeeps defaulting to the Tickle-Me Wiggly Jingle from Starkid’s “Black Friday” (which is a very good musical along with all of Starkid’s other stuff up on their youtube channel for free so since we’re all in quarantine.... 👀)

Following and followers: following 342 and 471 followers. but im also 80% sure a lot of those are old deactivated One Direction blogs from eons ago

Amount I sleep: I average anywhere from 7-9 hours but always feel tired regardless

Lucky Number(s): im a big fan of how the numbers 7 and 13 look and i couldnt tell you why

Dream Job: currently im wanting to be a cosmotologist! but i have so many aspirations so who really knows

Wearing: grey long sleeved shirt, light wash ripped jeans, blue socks

Favourite song(s): this changes a lot aaaaaaaaaaaaa. currently obsessed with What Do You Say and Feast or Famine, also both from Black Friday, because the music is just very good and the choreography and everything. muah chefs kiss

Random Fact: when i was liiiiike, 4 or 5 i went “hey what would happen if i stuck a button up my nose”, as one does, and the short answer is you end up being knocked out at the hospital so they can remove it because you’re a little kid and wont let them put shit up your nose. i still have the button

Favourite Authors: you guys read books? i was really into David Levithan’s stuff in high school because of the lgbt inclusiveness, and Seanan McGuire is also a pretty cool gal

Favourite Animal Noises: porcupines in general. when animals make sounds as they eat. when you touch a cat when they arent expecting it so they go “mrrr??”. any sound elephants make bc theyre babies

Aesthetic: comfy AND cute clothes. reclaiming pinks and yellows from the “i hate ‘girly’ colors” phase of life. nights spent with friends doing nothing but just sitting around and talking and being together. all sorts of affection. finding a show that you cant stop thinking about and watching all 3 seasons over the span of a week or less. feeling somehow lighter after finally seeing a tree start to blossom after a sucky winter. enjoying sunshine on your face but also coming to resent it during summer and then missing it again in the winter. knowing what you stand for and holding your ground but also being open to seeing another perspective. being kind just because you can

i dont think i can get 17 people but damn i guess i’ll try: @amextris @waywren @c0ffeeh0use-cynic @cuefog @crvwly @mywingsareonwheels @purplespacecats @sleepymccoy @kumishii @lokkish @sannikov-land @okinginthenorth

okay 12 is close enough, and as always no pressure to do this!!

#hanna speaks #about me #agshfkg i got a lil carried away on the aesthetic but OH WELL #my personal aesthetic is so hard to narrow down so have some random bits and pieces #also thank you ivy for tagging me i appreciate it a lot 🥺❤️

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luobingmeis · 5 years

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it's nbd! honestly i prefer happy endings as well. and yeah i get how you're scared of talking about this because the fanbase is very divisive about it. hell there's some people who think lucretia is the villain (they're free to do so im just gonna disagree on that). i don't even know how their conversation will go because there's a /lot/ to unpack. kinda unrelated but why'd you think lup wasn't as mad as taako? i mean lucretia basically erased her existence for 12+ years.

yeah omg i apologize i didn’t mean to come at you kinda guns blazing, this is just a subject i get very passionate about but don’t get to talk about a lot

and ooh omg i love that question!!! and have also thought abt it a lot. tbh i actually have a lot to say on the birds forgiving lucretia and who would forgive her first vs. who would forgive her last and what circumstances affected their forgiveness and all that jazz

but with lup, specifically, i have some points!!!

by the end of stolen century, we could see that lup was, at the very least, beginning to regret what they did. i think she was one of the ones most affected by what the relics were doing bc the phoenix fire gauntlet was the most chaotic (i think canonically it’s the one that did the most collateral damage?). in the final chapter, we saw how tired she was and, idk about you, but i felt regret in everything she said in that final conversation with taako.

so, therefore, i think she would at least understand lucretia taking this all on her own. i don’t think lup would fault her for not asking for help bc… lup did the same thing. she left to go reclaim the gauntlet by herself, and she died. even if she wasn’t erased, there was no guarantee people would find her and, even if they did, who was to say if they would actually find her? she gets that nothing that they do anymore is an easy feat.

i think she (and all the birds) see that what lucretia did wasn’t easy. lucretia didn’t do what she did out of malice or bc she wanted to prove everyone wrong. she did all of that bc she saw her family hurting, the world dying, and she felt backed into a corner. again, not to stand on a soapbox here, but it pisses me off so much when people act like any of the decisions the birds had to make were easy decisions. taako says it himself!!! “sometimes there aren’t good and bad decisions, sometimes there are just decisions.” what lucretia did obviously wasn’t the best thing, but neither was making the relics, and i think lup really does get that. all seven of them were stressed and tired and hurting and beaten down and they all made decisions for entire worlds and i think lup is the first one to understand that nothing that lucretia did was easy

i also think that, after basically losing 12 years, lup is kinda in that situation of “i don’t want to lose anything else,” and no one can convince me that lup and lucretia were not best friends on the starblaster… so i think, to a degree, lup just… chooses to forgive and, to quote, “forget about the whole thing”

and, here’s the thing, i think there was a time when lup was mad. when she was just all pure emotion and magic, and when she realized what was going on, i think she really was angry. angry at everything, bc this wasn’t supposed to be what happened. but i think she took the time to think over the aforementioned, and, during/after s&s, i think she quickly realized that, yeah the voidfishing obvi wasn’t good, and neither was the relics, but both of those led to them finally defeating the hunger?? like, balance does this wonderful thing of “every single thing you have done in your life, every single person you have met, it has all lead you to exactly where you need to be” and tbh i think everyone, not just lup, sees that they never would’ve defeated the hunger if the relics weren’t made and the voidfishing never happened

ALSO this isn’t lup related but one of my favorite moments of sc is when magnus tells lucretia “if the relics don’t work, we can try your idea” and griffin says, “if this was a telltale game, in the corner it would say ‘lucretia will remember that’” bc, in lucretia’s eyes, the relics didn’t work!!! they were destroying not only her family, but the world!!!!

basically, moral of my ted talk, i think lup forgives lucretia incredibly quickly bc she knows lucretia and knows that nothing that they ever did was easy and knows that lucretia had no malice out of her decision and was just trying to fix everything on her own so that her family can be happy

#answered #Anonymous #lup #lucretia #taz balance

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angelnumber27 · 5 years

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ggod i wish i was as positive and cheerful as U . have a nice day

Thank you so much this means a lot to me.

I have a very hard time with a lot of things, I’ve been through so much trauma and people still stalk and harass me to this day, there are literally people who wish I was dead, but instead of giving into that I’ve made the conscious choice to continue in my own path and to stay consistent with my OWN energy instead of dumbing myself down and shrinking myself to match other people’s shitty ass energy. I spent so long letting the abuse control me, letting those people who wanted nothing but negativity and hate for me for the rest of my life get to me and convince me that I SHOULD die and that I deserved all of this and that I’m not worth anything and that I can’t get better and I’m extremely happy to say that now I’m getting to a place where I am able to realize that every ounce of hate projected at me comes from the hate inside that person’s heart. I thought forever that I’m just damaged goods and irreparable and feeling like I’ll only get worse for the rest of my life, and through other people constantly trying to get me to believe these things I’ve realized that they aren’t true at all. I deserve love and light and goodness and healing and the best most fulfilling life possible. I’ve chosen to reclaim the control over my energy and my feelings and how I let people and things affect me. I wasted years wallowing in self-hatred and pity and I’m grateful I’ve been able to wake up and see that nothing is going to change if I don’t change, nothing is going to happen for me if I don’t make it happen. There is no point for me to sit in my own pain, for me to constantly think about the trauma and the abuse and to let evil win. It hurts yeah and im still healing from so many things I don’t speak about but even in a life full of trauma and pain so much love and goodness can be found. I was so tired of wasting my time destroying myself on top of others trying to destroy me. I had to get up and realize that this negativity isn’t doing anything for me, that I do have a significant degree of control, and that it’s time for me to start working with myself to grow into the person I’m meant to be instead of continuing to let every source of negativity control me, limit me, and hinder my progress. I realized that a life letting others control me and a life led to please others, a life living in fear of what people think, isn’t a life at all. That’s not what I want. I want healing and learning and love and growth. I want to move forward not backwards. And hyperfocusing on and holding onto every single negative hateful person or word was just making me feel worse. Through people trying to make me feel awful and telling me that I’m disgusting and sick and ugly and incapable and unable to heal, I’ve been able to stop such frequent negative self-talk. I used to hate myself and tell myself that every single thing about me and everything I said and did was a mistake and I should just shut up and that nobody likes me or cares about me and that the only solution was suicide. Evil individuals started finding out my trauma and weaknesses, my mental illnesses and the extremely personal things I tried my hardest to keep from toxic people, and every day since have used them against me publicly and directly to me. The most disgusting things you can think of. Like I did not know people could be so disgustingly evil. Some of the things they would say are things I used to say to myself and truly believe. I’ve realized now that none of these things are true. I’ve realized that there’s no need to match that terrible energy, I literally want to be the polar opposite of the people who have abused me. I’ll never let them win. I know exactly what they want, which is for me to not only believe these things and hate myself but also to match their energy and become exactly like them. They want to get under my skin to the point that they bring out a negative side of me, and then exploit it. They want to make me look like they actually are, making themselves look innocent. I decided that nobody gets to control me anymore. I chose love and light. You can too.

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followthebluebell · 6 years

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Can you talk a little more about aggression rooted in.. what was it you said, anxiety/related issues in cats? I’m curious about it and cat behavior in general. Even if you could toss out some more specific things to google! Im about to scroll your blog for a bit so if you’ve already elaborated on this, please feel free to ignore my ask :)

Sure! I’ll talk about anxiety-based aggression and fear-based aggression today!

Snowflake is like… the QUINTESSENTIAL anxiety-aggressive cat. She’s a cat who would purr, rub against any furniture in her room, and even approach people before ‘suddenly’ swatting at any attempts to pet her and dart away. It would have been easy to mistake her behavior for aggression. In her particular case, all of the purring and rubbing was ACTUALLY an attempt to tell me, ‘I’m feeling insecure and want to mark my smell around as much as I can, please do not disturb me’ and any attempts to pet her were considered Extremely Rude in Cat.

It can be really hard to tell the difference between ‘i am a calm and confident cat who JUST HAPPENS to be marking my stuff’ and ‘I’m a frightened cat trying to reclaim some sense of stability, so I’m desperately marking everything’. Eye contact is a big clue. Snowflake would make hard eye contact with no blinking, but a confident cat will make long, slow blinks.

Her anxiety was successfully handled by giving her plenty of spaces that are Cat Only (so she could easily remove herself from unwanted human attention) and with gentle socialization. She is now very happily adopted and treasured.

A good example of fear-based aggression would be ‘Eleanor’, a declawed bengal cross we fostered. She was adopted into a home with a dog (an elderly greyhound who liked cats and would generally attempt to snooze nearby them) and it didn’t go well. Eleanor would actively seek out and attack the dog.

“Wow, what an asshole cat!” is the easy answer, isn’t it?

But let’s delve more into her history.

Eleanor was declawed at 4 weeks old, which is about the time when kittens begin playfighting with each other and their mother in earnest. They also actively seek out and playfight with humans at this age. It’s an exploratory age where they begin to learn claw inhibition and how to properly use paws. I suspect she was declawed as soon as she drew blood (which, again, is a VERY normal kitten thing). Without this important communication tool, she was helpless and turned to biting. She was surrendered to the rescue once she started biting.

It’s easy to see why a cat, who had already experienced a serious upset in her life, would behave aggressively towards a Large and Scary Animal who liked to be by her. She just wanted to scare the dog away from Her Space.

The people who adopted her decided NOT to work on her dog issues and returned her to the rescue (this is a fair decision). Her anxiety flared up BIG time and she started behaving aggressively towards staff. She was put on some anti-anxiety meds and slowly calmed down.

She was re-adopted into a home, this time without a dog. I firmly believe that she wouldn’t have had most of her issues if she hadn’t been declawed as a kitten.

It can be REALLY difficult to separate anxiety-based aggression and fear-based aggression, but it’s really important to try and differentiate them. Some medications will NOT have an affect on fear-based aggression, so it’s important to have the cat evaluated in person by a veterinary behaviorist. In these cases, I used self-soothing behaviors as the deciding factor in what was fear-based (Eleanor) and what was anxiety-based (Snowflake). Snowflake frequently attempted to soothe her anxieties by rubbing against items and actively tried to tell observers that she was uncomfortable, while Eleanor just wanted to go and fuck shit up. Both cats were technically scared, but their fears were rooted in different mechanisms and reasons.

#cat #cat behavior

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coalitiongirl · 7 years

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ive been watching your scenes to rewatch and ive been crying at literally all of them. out of curoisity, what are your favourite ouat scenes? either sq or general? also side note, i love your latest fic, such an interesting premise. i get so scared every time someone says an order and emmas forced to comply, that scene with the trolls had me on edge. and the fact that cora must suspect something about emma now - im so scared but excited ahah :D have a nice day :)

OH I super dropped the ball on those omg, i have so many others!! but i haven’t been able to rewatch in a long time, it hard 😩

of course i LOVE almost every swan queen scene!! it’s hard for me to pick favorites because nearly every one pings something else inside me omfg. I don’t think there’s a single sq scene I couldn’t write an essay about WHOOPS. so lemme try to answer this with just some of my favorite non-sq scenes 😅

Emma in True North: hoo boy, this is probably in my scenes to rewatch but that scene on the road, MAN. there’s so much careful buildup with emma’s abandonment issues and how much she sees herself in nick and ava. and they have a chance she never does and dammit, she fights for them!! she fights for two kids just like her and they get their moment and jmo turns that realization into agony with sheer artistry in emma’s FACE in their final moment. god.

Regina in We Are Both: this was the episode that sold me on Regina! tbh i’d marathoned s1 as soon as they announced mulan was going to be in s2 so i hadn’t been focusing much on thinking before that?? and then suddenly there’s Regina, in all her rich and layered stories, and i fell hARD. the whole narrative of the episode- Regina resisting parental abuse until she becomes what she’s always feared to be free!! and that translating into her saying ‘no, this isn’t going to continue to the next generation. even if i lose the only thing that matters to me.’ do u ever stan!!! I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE VERY WELL. END ME.

Emma in Firebird: listen. never follow ur idols to ur next fandom or you’ll suddenly realize they actually hate women and then get ‘’’muted’’’ for ‘’’yelling at her too much’’’ but jane espenson did a GOOD with the flashbacks in this one (present day still literal and figurative hell tho!!). The concept of Emma’s jacket as armor isn’t an original one, but the execution was honestly stellar. Emma forging this connection with an older hardened woman who can’t let go of the past either!! emma destroyed and remade into the lady we met on her twenty-eighth birthday. GOD. SHE FINDS HER DAUGHTER. and i gotta say, the vulnerable-tearful-young thing jmo was doing w emma in s5 didn’t work for me in terms of what present day was trying to convey, but it’s a perfect fit for that flashback, i WEPT.

Regina in Quite A Common Fairy: Lana OWNS the cave scene with Tink, god. The depth and breadth of emoTION. The episode and the narrative itself builds it up from episode one! because this regina on the road to redemption but finally giving us a glimpse into the emotional and mental state she was in as the young queen- she has all this rage and she’s SUSTAINED by it, it’s her only real truth and constant and she’s terrified of what might happen if she lets it go for even an instant and chooses hope instead. (Lana’s voice when Regina says she’s afraid that without rage she might just ‘—float away’ is something that has stayed with me for a long, long time.) REGINA PULLING OUT HER HEART TO MAKE A POINT. far from the last time she will, but how affecting!! god!!

Emma and Snow in S1: There are a few moments i’m thinking of (and i’m literally writing this on the treadmill so pls forgive the lack of episode names) and all of them are so stellar, god. The moment when Snow finds Emma living out of her car early on. Snow and Emma sitting at the table at the loft holding hands. Emma lying down next to a crying Snow. Snow yelling at Emma for being so selfish when she tries running off with Henry?? EMMA SHOWING UP AT MARY MARGARET’S DOOR SEARCHING FOR A ~PERSON~ AND MARY MARGARET SILENTLY LETTING HER IN. Snow and Emma work best in S1 in the silences and the fights, where they’re allowed to just care and be family, and I treasure each of those moments as much as they do.

Regina and Zelena in the Kansas: There’s a lot of effort put into this dynamic right near what seemed like the end, playing with how exactly Zelena perceives her happy ending to go- and then Regina strikes it all down by being different, by changing, by being someone Zelena hadn’t believed either of them capable of. And then Regina goes to Zelena’s cell and offers her!! sisterhood!! my god. i instantly fell in love with the dynamic in that moment and i’m forever pressed that the ‘it’s nice to have family in town’ line was cut. because you can tell that regina craves family and craves unmaking this second monster of her mother’s and zelena was going to TAKE that second chance and hey! this seems the perfect time to go off-message and

Belle in Family Business and Heroes and Villains: imma be honest, i like belle just fine in the early seasons but i have zero interest in rumbelle, which means a lot of fast-forwarding through her scenes. But these two scenes were ENCHANTING. Mirror Belle preying on Belle with the truth that she’s afraid to face! Emilie does such a fantastic job conveying so much cruelty in that scene, I was gaping and enthralled and hoping shattered sight was going to work exactly like that (and tbh props to ginny for doing a hella creepy snow at the start of Shattered Sight). And that town line scene!!! What a stunning, evocative scene. Belle reclaiming agency and taking action in such a 100% cold-blooded but necessary way!! that’s my ravenclaw babe!!!

Mulan and Aurora: I was young, and I Believed, and I Believed for a very long time. I am appalled at my naïveté too, don’t worry.

Regina in Enter the Dragon: LOOK it’s not about the leather but it’s a lil about the leather!!! I really appreciate both Regina in the past and present in this one and also how gay it is, and I’m most charmed by lil evil pep talking nugget Regina who just wants you to be the very best villain you can be! It’s such an artful melding of the exuberance of young!Regina and the delight in chaos of eq!Regina and i, for one, am a fan.

Emma (and Henry) in The Stranger/An Apple Red as Blood: my gOD. Okay I think one of the first times I cried while watching this show was in Emma’s desperate, hysterical denial to August about the curse. She’s so clearly hit rock bottom and she’s TERRIFIED of believing and it’s breaking her. SHE DIDNT ASK TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR EVERYONES HAPPINESS. SHE DOESNT WANT IT. THAT IS CRAP!!!! i love her!! i love emma swan!!! i do!!!!! and then moving into the end of the next episode when she tells henry she’s leaving and just!! ‘henry! life isn’t a story!’ man this show had some incredible early work. sigh. emma kneeling in front of henry begging him to listen! my god.

Regina in the Cricket Game: so i’m leaving out all my fave sq moments which severely limits the number of regina and emma scenes i can talk about here but the flashbacks in this one SURE ARE SOMETHING. regina has hit rock bottom in this set and you feel it in every moment, in her REGRET THAT I HAVE NOT CAUSED MORE PAIN and frickin stABBING snow and that dark scene with the candle oh god. this is a regina who doesn’t think about looking back anymore but who doesn’t think about looking forward, either, and she’s terrifying. it reminds me a lot of the scene later this season in Welcome to Storybrooke where she takes out snow’s heart and ‘see? i can have everything’ but there are tears sliding down her face. regina in enraged despair is something to behold!!

Henry (and Emma and Regina) in Operation Mongoose: Henry doesn’t often get lengthy times to shine that aren’t about other characters, but he was literally a YA hero in the author’s universe! man! what a kid! and his scenes with bandit Regina are some of my all-time favorites, as is that heartstopping moment when he reaches the top of that tower and flings the door open and Emma KNOWS him. reader, i wept. i wept hard. talk about your earned moments!!!

Emma as Dark Swan: posture! clothing! positioning! voice work! dark swan was a revelation i’m still rightfully bitter about, because she was EVERYTHING in those early episodes. the way she caressed snow’s face in first episode of 5a. the faux-innocent with the calculating eyes on the ship with whats-his-name. every interaction with henry where she was trying to be a PERSON. the way she moved! the way she felt more reptilian than human! i wanted to know everything about her!! (then i did and quit the show lol) honestly some of jmo’s best acting to date, i’m forever in awe.

That Still Small Voice: look, this is an episode about a cricket and it remains one of my favorite quality ouat episodes. Archie sells it best as an adult influenced by his past without quite knowing it, and Archie and Henry make for a really engaging dynamic in here. There is nothing about Archie’s professional behavior that doesn’t make me want to scream but this remains a very, very good episode.

Emma in Sympathy for the De Vil/Lily: okay this is cheating a little because so much of this is also Regina but!! Emma individually shines in this narrative and throughout 4b. From the moment she finds out about what her parents had done, you can watch it slowly draining a part of her?? yes her eyes got redder but there was also this kind of apathy about EVERYTHING. And tbh the Cruella episode is pretty awesome on its own (I love the slow revelation that Cru is the villain, what a stellar execution of a fave trope) but WHEN EMMA KILLS HER. In the exact moment that Cruella says ‘heroes don’t kill’. that’s what pushes emma over the edge!! and then emma ready to kill again the next episode because she feels like she’s sliding into an abyss, i couldn’t BREATHE. emma is incredible when the narrative lets her be angry, and i wanted So Much More. Speaking of which, Emma getting angrier and angrier and almost losing it in The Snow Queen was more of that anger!! i am HUNGRY for it.

Regina and Snow in The Evil Queen: This episode is messy af but damn did my heart skip a beat when a hooded hero saves Regina and tears off her hood and it’s SNOW. This episode does so much of what makes Snow/Regina so fascinating and frustrating, both in the present and the past. Their interactions in the woods moved me! changed me! and Regina had already crossed the point of no return but oh man, oh man, the way they’d almost gotten somewhere for a minute there.

Regina and Henry in Save Henry: A classic, a work of art, and I’ve said so much about it in the past that I’m exhausted just thinking about expressing it all again now. But what a STORY of an evil queen who falls in love with a little boy. What a narrative!! The promo pictures from this episode came out when I was sitting in the hospital for a checkup while I was expecting my daughter, and I was tearing up and the nurses thought it was about the ultrasound. I’M NOT PROUD. This is a love story!!! And it culminates again in A Curious Thing, by the way, which put another ten years on my life, an Epic !

Emma and Henry in New York City Serenade: boy was this a journey, but I was absolutely spellbound omg. This was a love song to a fantasy but it’s a fantasy that never unmakes Emma– she’s afraid of commitment and happiness and everything permanent in her life that isn’t Henry, but she’s still going to take that leap despite herself. It’s a wonderful character study that captures Emma’s essence in a new world, with a new past.

Snow in The Miller’s Daughter: Snow is at her best when the show isn’t painting her with rose-colored glasses and we get to see her darker side, and I don’t think she ever gets quite as dark in the first three seasons as she is when she’s standing there, smiling earnestly at Regina as she tells her that the key to Cora loving Regina is in the poisoned heart she holds. My god. It’s so incredibly cold-blooded and vile, and it’s absolutely the kind of manipulative pragmatism that suits Snow best. I am enthralled and horrified.

Neal and Emma and Henry and Gold in Manhattan: This is one of those really cool scenes where even though I don’t particularly care for half the characters within it, everyone acted the hell out of it and it’s so GOOD. There’s so much tension and you’re holding your breath through the squabbling, and then Henry shows up and you KNOW. You know what’s going to happen and you’re terrified for Emma and it’s so visceral, right up until the instant when Neal demands Henry’s age and Henry shouts ELEVEN and my god, my god. What a reveal. What a scene.

There are more!! so many scenes and moments i’ve loved over the years. Emma and young!Lily! Snowing in Snow Falls! Anna of Arendale!! Snow and Emma in Lost Girl!! Ruby in Red Handed! The David/Emma dragon fight in A Land Without Magic! Regina tearing out that heart in The Doctor and meeting Daniel again?? Regina and her father in hell. all of Hat Trick. i think twenty is a good place to stop, but hoo boy, when this show was good, it was GOOD. alas.

#ouat #Anonymous

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transgenderteensurvivalguide · 7 years

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Advice? I'm with and living with someone who's toxic to me. He said he'd leave me if I came out trans, which fucked me up real bad. Since then, he's acted like it didn't even happen. Now when he touches my chest or lower, I just feel like having a panic attack. Im not really in a good financial state to leave him. I don't know what to do

Lee says:

If you’re able to safely tell him that you’d like a break from sexual activity for a while, then you should do so. You should be allowed to have boundaries, and say no to sex. If you aren’t able to safely say no, then you aren’t willingly consenting to the activity, and that’s assault. If you think he wouldn’t react well to you telling him you don’t want him to touch you, try to see if there are any local domestic violence organizations or shelters, and you could try calling the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233) and checking out the links below.

Panic attacks:

What are panic attacks?

Surviving panic attacks

How to cope with panic attacks

Information on panic attacks and coping

Panic attacks workbook

Panic self-help

How to calm yourself during a panic attack

Panic stations

7 steps to managing panic attacks

7 steps to cope with panic attacks

How to cope with triggers you can’t avoid

Anxiety

Depression

Breathing

Distress tolerance

Emotion

Coping:

Three skills to cope with abuse

3 ways to keep yourself safe when you’re not ready to leave your abusive partner

4 positivity doodles

Mental Support Community A forum to talk about any form of abuse and how it affected you.

Caring for yourself

Therapy for abuse victims

Tons of abuse information and coping links

Self-care

Documenting abuse:

How to prove emotional abuse

Documenting dating abuse

5 important ways to document abuse

How to document abuse

Journaling tips

What to do:

Getting help

Getting out and recording evidence

What to do when you’re living with an abusive person

How to deal with emotional abuse

Stalking help

Interactive guide to safety planning

Calling the police

What not to do when calling 911

Safety planning around sexual abuse

Emotional safety planning

Breaking up safely

Domestic violence

6 options for finding help after sexual assault

5 questions to help you decide if you should report being raped

6 ways to reject abusive relatives and restart your life

If you are being kicked out

Getting out of an abusive relationship

Having to sneak out

Money Fears Keeps People in Abusive Relationships. Here’s How to Change That.

How to Leave Your Husband When You Have No Money

13 tips on how to get out of an abusive relationship

Numbers to try calling for resources:

National Domestic Violence Hotline (TDD): 1-800-787-32324

Center for the Prevention of School Violence: 1-800-299-6504

Domestic Violence Helpline: 1-800-548-2722

Healing Woman Foundation (Abuse): 1-800-477-4111

Sexual Assault Support (24/7, English & Spanish): 1-800-223-5001

Domestic & Teen Dating Violence (English & Spanish: 1-800-992-2600

Is it abusive?

Types of dating abuse

4 ways to recognize gaslighting in your life (more)

5 questions to ask yourself if your partner is toxic

7 warning signs of an emotionally abusive partner

30 Signs Of Emotional Abuse

Recognizing the signs of an abusive relationship

What is domestic violence?

Abusive vs unhealthy

The cycle of abuse

Psychological abuse

@emotionalabuseawareness

Trauma:

What is trauma?

6 ways to cope with hurt and pain

5 self-care tips

Lifestyle changes to help recovery

Recovering from rape and sexual trauma

Traumatic stress

Self-help for PTSD

PTSD

PTSD occurrence

Post-traumatic stress

Emotional and psychological trauma

Toxic parents: overcoming their hurtful legacy and reclaiming your life

Triggers / Getting over triggers / Trigger jokes

4 ways to overcome self-blame after sexual assault

4 compassionate reminders for survivors of childhood abuse

4 Suggested Boundaries And Techniques While Writing About Trauma

Helping you heal from gaslighting

Trauma resources

The fight or flight response

Reacting after the event

You don’t have to be grateful that it wasn’t worse

Trauma is valid even if nobody was to blame

Being traumatized

Validation

Flashbacks:

What helps during a flashback?

Discrimination Worksheet for Flashbacks

Coping with flashbacks

How to deal with having PTSD

Implicit flashbacks

Breakups and ending relationships:

10 Tips on How to Work Through Feelings of Social Isolation

5 ways to beat loneliness

Ending unhealthy relationships

6 steps to ending a toxic relationship with a friend or partner

Dealing with a breakup

Help for when a relationship ends

Coping with a relationship breakup

7 phrases to help you get over a breakup

Beyond codependency

It’s okay to be alone

5 things to remember when you still love the emotionally abusive partner you left

5 helpful things when you end a relationship

How the 7 stages of grief apply to breakups

7 ways to cope with post-split stress

Letting go of someone who’s not good for you

Followers, any additional advice for anon?

#Lee says #abuse m #trauma m #assault m #cursing #Anonymous #transgenderteensurvivalguide #trans #transgender

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