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bisexualchaosdemon · 7 months

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Okay, but what if Andrew could actually score a goal?

I know, I know, just hear me out! We know that Andrew can bat the ball all the way to the other side of the court ("He swept his massive racquet around in one long swing and hit the ball so hard Neil heard it bounce off the away court wall behind him.")

And we also know that he has crazy good aim when deflecting shots on goal (There are a lot of examples of this, but let's go with "Andrew stopped every shot on goal and bounced a couple rebounds off the strikers' helmets just to rile them further." because I love how much of a little shit he is)

So, if Andrew is strong enough to hit the away court wall and precise enough with his aim to smack multiple players in the head/knees/feet, it's possible he could hit a ball into the other goal, right?

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blondie-drawings · 7 months

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can't stop thinking about those skeleton lesbians (pt 1)

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cynicallyneutral · 8 months

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Day 1: Soulmates

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molinaesque · 1 month

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"Ugh, I'm gonna miss that butt." - The Unicorn (2019)

#walton goggins #wade felton #the unicorn #unicorngifs #this entire show is just moment to moment Walton being the sexiest goofball with the snatchest waist and cutest butt #the most insane part is if you've ever seen him with his shirt off it's like the biggest “WTF” moment because he's so damn fit #there's a scene in season 1 where he's shirtless but this was in 2019... he was already fit but if you look at his more recent photos #HE GOT EVEN FITTER #LIKE COME ON MAN #YOU'RE 52 #HOW DO YOU STILL HAVE A 6 PACK THAT DOESN'T LOOK UNHEALTHY #anyway #more to come

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wearenotjustnumbers2 · 7 months

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These are the victims that everybody is telling us to pray for? "God is with us" Are you serious? How can anybody believe them playing the victim everywhere on social media when they're in festivals celebrating Palestinians' death and making tiktoks putting on makeup and mocking them and the dead children?

I cannot take anyone seriously who's like "pray for israel, we're at war 🕊" like use your brain.

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qqchurch · 9 months

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you know you're in a cishet male gamer discord when you see stuff like this without pushback in comment to people being mad or baffled by a gacha girl having a complete joke of proportions 🫡🫡🫡

#definitely shouldn't check servers im in just after waking up cause i forgot how much of a cognitohazard they are now #between this server having 'progressive but not TOO progressive' gamers (aka dont be an annoying queer)#and the other having ppl way too casually racist #it really is something to see servers i joined years ago just shifting rightward and no one else finds it weird #basically a ghost now in those places because damn #and dont tell me i should speak up because wtf am i supposed to do if im literally the only person that would comment on this #qq posts

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nibbelraz · 3 months

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I am endlessly entertained by the prospect of MBJ just having literally no clue how human physiology works, and thus believing everything he hears (which, paired with SQH's propensity for saying dumb shit without thinking, is a recipe for disaster)

like:

SQH: ugh if I read any more expense reports my eyeballs will fall out of my head

MBJ: *frantically gathering as many expense reports as he can carry before shoving them into the fire*

SQH: *literally watching all his work burn up in flames* i-

MBJ: please hold in your eyeballs

______

SQH, offhandedly: lmao wei qingwei ate so many bao buns at the festival that I honestly think he's going to turn into one

MBJ, absolutely horrified, actually gives his condolences to the (very confused) human man because this affliction which will soon take his humanity is a fate worse than death. Also he starts hiding SQH's melon seeds

_____

SQH: ugh I'm so stressed out i'm gonna EXPLODE

MBJ: NO-

Yes YES OH man Shang Qinghua definitely has no filter when complaining about stuff, Poor Mobei he's learning so many awful things about humans and how MUCH DANGER THEYRE IN (how much danger his favorite human is in)

He tries to learn more about what can happen to his poor human so he's spying on Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghuas meetings only to hear them BOTH dramatically explain how tired they are, Shen Qingqiu with some peak lord duties juggled with Binghe and Shang Qinghua with just the amount of paper work and how they both won't make it if things don't slow down soon which prompts Mobei to immediately tell Luo Binghe that his consort is going to DIE if he doesn't get rest immediately this second

I can see this getting SO out of hand so fast, He'd bury Shang Qinghua in blankets and hold him tight so absolutely nothing can bother him and he'd be safe

#svsss #shen qingqiu #luo binghe #shang qinghua #mobei jun #moshang #bingqiu #i would read a fic about this immediately i love how they cant communicate #because i know Shang Qinghua would be WAY too confused to even try to put together wtf is happening with his king #he misses his melon seeds #and his work keeps getting burned #my king what are you doing? Are you trying to make my work longer?#also Binghe would wholehearedly belive Mobei if he said his shizun is dying from lack of rest #immediately making Shen Qingqiu lay in bed and latching onto him and hiss8ng at anyone that bothers them #nib text #ask

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artofalassa · 4 months

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The Earring

the missing piece from my Zack Lives AU set in post AC

#zakkura #clack #zack fair #cloud strife #final fantasy vii #ff7 #ff7r #i can't stress enough how much I am excited for the new game #also yeah this one didn't make it into the book because of the page count #the book was already a chonk #so here it is now #might drop it into the Missing Pieces compilation later #hey hi who still rememberes my AU hahah #also wtf it was so ??? drawing a zakkura in the Wolfwood style

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linusbenjamin · 7 months

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We're perfect for each other. You're gonna figure that out someday.

#person of interest #poiedit #poi spoilers #tvedit #root #samantha groves #sameen shaw #scifiedit #nikolatexla #LAST EPISODE WAS TOTALLY INSANE #i was truly shocked like i paused the video and just looked at the screen for a while because what the fuck #BTW THE FACT THAT THIS WAS HOW THE MACHINE IMAGINED THEY WOULD BE??? SIMULATED THEM AS LOVERS?? WTF #no way this show aired in 2014 #i enjoyed every second of this episode especially the scene where the machine realized time ran out so she had to simplify the dialogues 💀#pure genius

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c-hrona · 4 months

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Trigun body horror week

Day 3 - Lungs

Scream

Girls have butterfly in their bellies, when they are in love.

You have his feathers in your lungs, and his panic in your chest, and his cries in your voice.

#trigunbodyhorrorweek #trigun #trigun maximum #meryl stryfe #i love how fucking traumatized every single character is #isn't amazing when your whole cast should go to a VERY GOOD therapist? :D #anyway #i should write and draw more about meryl's trauma because it's so juicy :3c #just not very happy with whatever the hell happened to those lungs wtf #but i don't have time to make them better T_T #chronart

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tippenfunkaport · 5 months

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That viral post that's going around about how people who write "book quality" mlm fic are too "normal" to publish and have real jobs so only "weird" people publish their "shitty" fanfic is so completely out of touch with reality and I am giving a massive side eye to everyone reblogging it.

Not only is it completely, easily verifiably untrue (you cannot enter any professional writing space without tripping over a dozen grizzled scifi writers who got their start by filing off the serial numbers and publishing their Star Trek fanfic even going back decades ago??? it's a whole thing?? plus how can you look at the mlm category on Amazon right now and say with a straight face that people aren't publishing shitty Spirk and Stucky fanfic??? Oh, honey...) it's also the perfect example of this kind of sneering elitism that true artists would never sully themselves by seeking profit, they do it only for the purity of the thing that always somehow leads back to, "no one should be paid to make art, actually."

The only reason you're seeing more published fanfic right now has nothing to do with the idealistic purity of your hypothetical government employee written smut of the past vs the debased scribbles of those awful straights of today and everything to do with the fact that a) self-publishing has created a voracious readership that wants a ton of content so it's become a viable, flexible income stream for many, especially disabled people b) anyone can publish now with self-publishing tools so there are less gatekeepers and c) lockdown got a lot of people into fandom and therefore writing who never tried it before.

And if you really think there's no "shitty" published mlm and no "book-quality" m/f writing out there that started as fanfic, then you are clearly not a reader so why are you even talking about this?

#love how they manipulated people into spreading that post by making it seem like a cishet vs gay thing #when the real message is OP thinks trying to sell your writing is cringe and 'weird' and 'normal people' with jobs would never #which would of course never have flown on the fandom website #so they played into the queer shipping is purer than cishet shipping puriteen thing #and it worked!#because my god people are gullible #this is the direct pipeline that leads to AI thievery #''normal' people write for the joy of it anyway so why do you need pay? you are just greedy and 'weird'!'#'oh no this isn't about who we get to call cringe and who gets to profit from art it's about um...#(quick what's a hated m/f ship?).. oh uh 'shitty' REYLO #and not our super pure uh... (spirk is still popular right? lets throw in that avengers one too to make it seem timely) stucky!'#I'm sorry if I have no sense of humor about this but the year is 2024 and people are still way too ready to sneer #about writers trying to earn a fucking living in the shittiest timeline #and i need you to look deep into yourself and ask you why it's so important to you to tell yourself that only people writing what you like #are 'normal' with real jobs and to vilify everyone else as 'weird' and 'shitty'#for trying to make an income during a financial fucking crisis #i would say sorry for ranting about this but I'm not sorry because wtf #write whatever you want #publish whatever you want #there is no moral fucking purity in what the content is #and one thing certainly doesn't make you more 'weird' or 'normal' than the other #like there is soooo much shitty mlm that started as fanfic???#that post is 100% OP made up some guys to get mad about and called them relyos for the clicks #writing #publishing #writblr #writeblr #i wasn't going to tag this anything but you know what fuck it I'm mad #i had like 5 more tags but tumblr cut me off which is fair 😅#fan fiction

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puppetmaster13u · 6 months

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Prompt 119

Another divine twitch chat Au? Another divine twitch chat Au. With a bit of a twist.

Billy would like to say it is in fact not his fault. It’s really not. Who hits someone with magic they obviously don’t know how to use? Well okay maybe he had done that before, but it’s not like he ever did it around other people where they could get hit!

But someone was an idiot and now he’s here, as his normal ten-year old self kicking his legs while sitting in the Watchtower as the others argued. Apparently the League thinks he’s been de-aged, which is good as his secret isn’t out.

The uh, issue is that something about the spell might have um, partially manifested the gods- or as he called them the Mediterranean Magic Men, if only because of how annoyed it made Zeus. Now everyone can see the chat that’s usually only visible to him and apparently it’s concerning.

He doesn’t see how it’s an issue, Zeus has been silenced for the next hour and Hercules has been dying of laughter for the last three. Oh, wait, it might be from Mercury’s constant attempted flirting with Flash. …Or the fact they’re trying to convince him to commit a crime and he’s honestly down for doing so seeing as he’s a homeless ten year old who is down for getting clairvoyance and super speed for the next thirty minutes in exchange…

#prompts #dc #dcu #divine twitch chat #Billy has gone past panicking and is just *yep this might as well happen*#The MMM have somehow convinced half the league that Marvel was made from their magic and mortal blood a couple years ago exactly #“Why yes this is their funky magic creation child isn't he great we're still trying to get him to curse someone but he's still just a baby”#The league are all sobbing and freaking out because wtf why is Marvel now a- wait he came into existence 10 years old #What do you mean No please explain #Oh god the gods are ignoring them and bothering the poor baby marvel-#M-marvel why are you listening to them- DO NOT GO BACK TO EARTH JUST TO KICK A COP #SOMEBODY GRAB THE MINI MARVEL #How did this feral gremlin become Marvel?!#The MMM: Ah yes we're raising him so well look at how they grow :)#captain marvel #shazam #justice league #mediterranean magic men #Whenever the MMM talk or do something they're partially visible like colored ghost-mists lol #It's all over once they realize they can interact with the world again #Time to pick up their funky lil dude and go on a run through the watchtower #The champion of magic has to be pure of heart to deal with the gods' shenanigans

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mayxo-hxh · 23 days

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i love how illumi and hisoka are freak by nature x freak by act. like hisoka could 100% be a normal person if he chose to be one day but illumi couldn't act normal even if he tried

Hisoka is the guy that makes a conscious effort for people to perceive him as a disgusting freak every single day but Illumi doesnt even have to try. he just is. he exists and people are weirded the fuck out by him. Even hisoka agrees too like 😭😭😭😭

#like hisoka in greed island was the definition of. what if he was a normal guy.#all he ever did was lie and play dating sims and maybe 1 volleyball game. he even said shit like teamwork makes the dreamwork #even gon was like wtf hisoka is so ooc right now HFHDXJHHSJGHS #meanwhile illumis normal is just. nonexistent. because hes not normal.#that time he went “theyll realize how different are worlds are” oh yeah.#also to be called fucked up by hisoka? illumi won the fucked up hxh bitch title i fear.#hisoillu #hisoka x illumi #illumi #illumi zoldyck #hisoka #hisoka morow #hxh #hunter x hunter #my post

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phoenixcatch7 · 13 days

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Oh yeah story idea: percy Jackson reaches his emotional/mental limits) (annabeth gets knocked down during a huge fight and nearly gets killed) and goes absolutely ape. We're talking hurricanes, earthquakes, a zillion exploding water sources, blood bending, poison bending, pounding rain, the works.

And it starts to kill him. Like eating too much ambrosia, his mortal body is burning up, too much power too quickly.

But through sheer force of will and the amount of divine energy he's putting out, he keeps clinging on as his body crumbles to ash, divine power building stronger and stronger and higher and higher.

And he accidentally brute forces his way into godhood.

And what would have been a true power reveal and two deaths, Percy being punished for his strength ala Frank, abruptly becomes a pseudo divine political drama, with percy at risk of any dozen horrific fates the frenzied council are slinging around (minus poseidon, who is also frenzied but unwilling to let his newly immortal son die) whilst dealing with all the ramifications of divinity and the new social strata of the immortal pantheon (and EVERYONE having opinions), all while trying to get back home.

But Annabeth survives because of it, so he can't really complain.

#percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #percy pjo #percy series #percy and annabeth #percabeth #pjo hoo toa #pjo series #pjo fandom #heroes of olympus #riordanverse #prompt #fic prompt #writing prompt #story prompt #writing ideas #story prompts #Poseidon would be so awkward lmao #He'd know how upset and devastated percy was and he's going to have to tell his immortal family but also yay?? But also aaaa wtf #He'd get the implications but also yay immortal son he won't have to watch die and he can finally spend time with him safely #Zeus would just want Percy dead. Athena would have Plans tm. Annabeth is nearly dead. Mr d is getting so much drama from both sides.#EVERYONE is freaking out a lot because it's not supposed to be possible and the implications are not great for anyone.#Percy just really wants to go home and hug his mum and gf #Plus he's got way too much beef with people up top to live peacefully on olympus lmao

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mxfrodo · 2 months

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y'all for fucking real. don't fucking write slave fics or x reader fics of aventurine's slavery??? are you guys out of your goddamn minds???

#i swear half of you don't fucking think.#what makes you think it's okay or “angsty” to write fics about suffering like that #especially without nuance?? or any understanding of the ramifications #its one thing to write about it being integrated into his past #but it's another thing to write it as an *in the moment* thing #especially if you're writing it to portray him being bought again -- who gives a shit if the reader “saves” him or “treats him nicely”#that's still a perpetuation of the cycle of abuses #like it's still already brain dead of hoyoverse to write about the suffering of POC by using a fair skinned blonde man #but come on #i thought we were better than this??#like yeahh #dont get me wrong - i love aventurine and his development. the writing is amazing despite how bad form using very white features #to portray a real race of color and it's suffering (the romani)#but you guys. come the fuck on #hsr aventurine #aventurine honkai star rail #aventurine x reader #honkai star rail #hsr #hsr x reader #i know it's “NOT THAT SEROUS” because it's a fictional game but im still putting tags for racism and slavery bro. wtf y'all #tw racism #tw slavery #random talk

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dumbfucksystem · 1 month

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imagine if the shen family was actually a part of the mafia. and shen yuan just never knew.

like his Family is rich and they are all super close. he’s even in contact with some of his distant relatives pretty often, which is kinda cool for him, he’s sure that this isn’t the case for most families so he considers himself lucky to know the extent of his family tree. sure, some of them seem to have lost a marble or two but what family doesn’t have a couple oddballs in their midst, you know?

and its not just sy’s comical obliviousness that contributes to this. his family is well aware that sy is not suited for this life style- especially his siblings. they grew up watching him get himself into all sorts of weird situations and putting himself at a disadvantage simply because he’s too nice. he can try and deny it all he wants (just like how he denies he’s gay- c’mon sy everyone can tell you are not straight) but his sense of justice would only burden him if he were to work for the Family. not to mention his sense of self preservation is absolute shit and they don’t want to have to babysit him his whole life- and he probably doesn’t want that either!

so they send him off to college, help him find an apartment, and basically do everything they can to help him start off on his own, away from the Family. his siblings had to do a whole lot of convincing to let this happen btw- this kind of thing usually isn’t allowed, but sy doesn’t know anything that could be used against the Family, so they make an exception in his case. better for them to not have a deadweight sticking around either is what they say but they all dote on him anyways and refuse to admit they care about him. sy definitely picked up this line of reasoning from them btw.

shen yuan is a little upset and confused that his Family seems eager to send him off (it’s not like they can’t afford for him to live with them after all- both of his older brothers still live in the Family’s massive house and even his aunts and uncles are living there??). he manages to recover quickly though. at least now he can read his web novels in piece without prompting any dick jokes (his cousins had a field day when they found his account with all of his pidw comments…). now he just needs to figure out how to live by himself.

it’s not that sy is incapable of taking care of himself- it’s just that he’s so used to having other people with him that he never understood how much they were doing for him until they were no longer around. but that’s fine, living on your own is just another learning curve and sy is willing to rise up to the challenge. which he did, by the way! he found a job and pays his taxes and even though that isn’t much he still gives himself a mental pat on the back for it. he is still in contact with his siblings, he never misses an update for pidw which he totally doesn’t get excited for and his life is going great.

……until he accidentally eats some expired food and dies.

#and the Family thinks that someone assassinated him #but his siblings know that he rlly was just too careless TT #not sure if someone has done this already but here #shen yuan mafia au #except its not??? technically????#imagine sqq and sqh are forced back into the modern world and airplane is like wtf. wdym you were this rich this whole time.#and it clicks for him immediately that sy’s family is involved in organized crime #sketchy recognizes sketchy. airplane was never a fan of commiting felonies but living another life as sqh gave him that sixth sense #or smth like that idfk lol #something something sy/sqq has always needed a chaperone cause hes so fucking reckless #first it was his siblings and now its lbh lqg mf yqy and that doctor guy i forgot his acronyms rip #svsss #svsss au #scum villian self saving system #scumbag self saving system #scum villain's self saving system #scum villain #scumbag system #ren zha fanpai zijiu xitong #shen qingqiu #shen yuan #airplane shooting towards the sky #mxtx svsss #svsss ideas #svsss shitpost #also i keep seeing different things about how sy died..?#because when i first read svsss i thought he died in a fit of rage #but then ppl said that he choked on his food while finishing pidw #and then i heard other things about how he ate expired food???? like a bao bun or a dumpling or ramen idk #so i decided to go with expired food cause lbh would NEVER let him die like that lol

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