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onlyplatonicirl · 10 months

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henlo it is i the headcANON, here to go ramble about everyone's favourite little guy, casey. its insane to me just how much you've endeared me and many other tcoti fans to this silly fella

i can see casey going to a religious school (the only difference from a non religious school is you learn re but literally no one cares lol), most parents will try and send their kids there cause they are known for being better schools (they get more funding for extra lessons), and casey couldnt give less of a shit about it

i also think he wouldve went to an all boys school, he just sorts acts like he did lol

whilst in school my man would try and break every single dress code policy known to man, half of the time hed just show up in his pe clothes, the other time hed show up with no tie, no jacket, a coat and whatever else he could fet his hands on that he wasnt supposed to have (english schools have really strict dress codes, idk why its dumb)

he knows a small amount of spanish, in most british schools you are forced to do mfl (modern foreign languages) and its usually either french or spanish (you rarely have a choice to pick which you want to do), some will let you pick up german and even mandarin but thats usually at gcse level or as an extracurricular activity (which most kids are also forced to do). he isnt fluent in spanish, not by a long shot, but he definitely knows how to have a conversation, albeit very scripted and short. however, one thing he does understand is how to swear in spanish, and what it sounds like. i imagine him and his friends just looking it up on the laptops during class time, definitely to annoy their teacher.

so i have this image in my head that gray doesnt like swearing all that much (maybe fresh got to him lol), so he tends to swear in spanish or french because the british boy wont understand - alas he does

casey could not be arsed with most lessons because he didnt really care about getting a good education since he couldnt see all that bright of a future for himself, if one at all, but he was actually quite good at maths and history, even when he tried not to be

he has been shown on more than one occasion, undernovella, and whilst he was put off it due to it 1. being in spanish, and 2. the cast being played 99% by monsters, he actually really ended up enjoying it by the end

hes also been getting into anime and manga ("dude its like a comic book but even more brutal"), mostly shonen like one punch man and dragon ball, but he also really enjoyed sailor moon and doesnt want to admit to it, he liked the romance and friendship aspect of it, also pretty girls

he has always been into comic books, his favourite super heroes are deadpool and spiderman

before he met gray (properly), he mostly played shooter games (ones that were free or cheap), fortnite, valorant, and a pirated copy of fifa, because thats what guys play. if his past self saw his year 4 stardew valley save file, hed spontaneously combust

i think he also plays splatoon now, he mains the dualies because theyre cool, hed definitely be an inkling as well but thats an au for another day

zelda too

despite everything thats happened, he really did grow to love his last foster mum, she was a single lady and she treated him like her own son. hes had bad experiences with the foster care system in the past (breaking news: fork found in kitchen), parents only taking him in for the money, some wanting to complete their family and forcing him to live by their ideals, all that bad stuff, which is why he often ran away from them. he had run away from his last foster mum, two times before, but it was very early into their relationship before they got to understand each other better.

his last foster mum asked him what his hobbies were his first night at her house, he didnt know, so she suggested he pick up an instrument - he decided the guitar, because it looked cool. he almost cried when she offered to buy him lessons, he didnt take her up on the offer, determined to learn it by himself, and he did

he has a really nice singing voice he'll never let anyone see - hes a lyric baritone

also whilst in canon hes a brummie, i like to imagine he was born a bit further north (hes a mackem to me), and moved to birmingham to be with his most recent and last foster parent, and that he lived there for so long thats hes picked up the accent

he felt really bad leaving her but managed to convincr himself that she would be better off without someone like him in her life

casey is a very traumatised child, he has a lot of triggers and boundaries he doesnt fully understand himself, plus a boat load of unhealthy coping mechanisms (mainly smoking and socially isolating himself)

he tries to keep his bad habits a secret from gray, because he doesnt know how he would feel about it - he knows, he doesnt like it but he isnt exaclty the greatest at having healthy coping mechanisms himself, at the very least he tries to get him to swap one for another, instead of smoking play stardew valley with me for 37 hours straight :) ?

he often struggles with the idea that hes a burden, so he doesnt let people spend money on him, or give him gifts

he also struggles to express his emotions (hes british unfortunately), and has a hard time saying 'i love you' to anyone, the only person he never strugfled saying that to was his mum

bit of a trigger warning, im going to be talking about casey's injuries and all that jazz, so if you dont wanna read, head to the next bullet point! casey shouldnt be alive, the injuries he suffered were severe, the paramedics were convicned he was a lost cause (still they have to do everything they can), so it was a shock to all when he pulled through. this was, however, not without a bit of a battle, and it left permanent effects on his health. casey's lungs are horribly scarred (smoke inhalation will do that to you), and it doesnt help that he smoked before and after. his nerves on the left side of his body where the support beam collapsed on him, are quite literally fried. where it hit directly, he cannot feel anything there, the areas that were dames by the fire however are unbelievably sensitive and painful to the touch. even after the scar healed it stills remains sensitive, so he bandages up those areas. the beam also broke and bruised a lot of his bones, mostly his ribs and the bones in his arms. his left ear is also burnt, and a portion of it, mostly the tips of it, are straight up missing. after recovering from the initial injury, he had a skin graft taken from his right thigh to supplement the damage done to the left side of his face. for a while after he had to take a lot of pain meds, and undergo a ton of therapy both mental and physical - even still hes not fully healed

casey loves animals, particularly dogs. his last foster mother had a german shepherd, and he used to let it sleep on his bed. it made him feel safe and loved. dogs and cats also just like to come up to him on the street, bros a disney princess for real

beefed with paperjam for a while, both had a lack of trust in each other, but they got to be on equal ground after a while, that didnt last long, not since after chapter 31..

hes fighting demons (bisexuality)

ever since he met gray and by extension his wack ass family, hes grown more and more accustomed to monster culture, particularly their disregard for gender norms and compulsive heterosexuality, and hes been experimenting with his gender expression, he never thought hed actually enjoy dressing in pink or taking care of his hair. he tried painting his nails, but did not have the patience to let them dry, he still sometimes wears it, albeit chipped and blotchy, but he thinks it suits him

he has always been fine with being labelled a man, but sometimes he doesnt feel as though it fits him, not entirely, hes not sure what his gender is because sometimes male really does fit him, but other times he just wants to throw the whole concept of gender away, hes stuck with unlabelled for a while and feels as though it somewhat fits him

he once buzzed his hair cause all the guys in his school did for whatever reason, he cried for several hours afterwards and got nicknamed sampson for a week, biggest mistake of his life - bro experienced dysphoria for the first time in his life

celebrates gyftmas because its way cooler than christmas (I NEED A GRACEY GYFTMAS ONESHOT ASAP), he celebrates the majority of monster holidays since everyone (1 to 2 people at max lmao) in the house he currently lives in does too. is confused as to what monster halloween is supposed to be

likes going out with gray (which is once in a blue moon), his favourite spot is waterfall, but he also really likes snowden and hotland

- headcANON

Holy shit HEADCANON I AM EATING SO WELL

Also I hope you don’t mind me tagging @ottererpop because they’re a Casey enthusiast as well and they must see all of this solid gold.

I Must respond to some of these AAA

- I talked with multiple people about how Casey is ABSOLUTELY breaking every dress code he possibly can. Like he would come to school in the bare minimum to not get expelled but his “uniform” would just be wrinkled to hell and his tie would just hang around his neck completely untied

- Casey is genuinely intelligent and if he actually tried in school he would do really well. However he’s a massive shithead and doesn’t care because of how depressed he is

- I do have a very specific speech pattern and tone of voice for him in my head but I’m not sure exactly how to write it. Also about him being from Birmingham - he’s not really from the main city itself but more generally around that area, so he very well could lived farther north and end up closer to the main city has he went to live with foster parents. Im purposefully avoiding getting too detailed with exact places and cities because then it just becomes hyper-specific.

- he absolutely would love undernovella - he love sitcoms so he would adore those over-dramatic plot twists

- He and his current foster mom (before he left ofc) have a tolerable relationship. She was often gone from the house and left him to his own devices, so he would mostly just skip school and play games on his computer all day, which did annoy her significantly.

- his smoking is partially a coping mechanism, partially a peer pressure “cool guy” thing that he picked up, and partially something that could very subtlety equate to self-harm. I could get into a whole thing about his smoking habits. He doesn’t smoke that often, but it is definitely something he tries to hide from Gray. Or at least not make it obvious. Like I said recently PJ has caught him smoking cigs over the kitchen sink while Gray’s been asleep.

- you are correct in your assumption that he doesn’t feel anything on the part of his torso that was severely burnt.

- I’m sure he has shaved all his hair off at some point. In the past he for-sure had one of those haircuts that’s short and buzzed all on the sides but long on the top, or at least buzzed in the back.

- gray’s family and the entire omega timeline being extremely unlabeled when it comes to gender and sexuality, like it’s not a big deal in the slightest, is definitely a massive change for Casey and he struggles to understand it. He’s grown up in an environment where he’s constantly felt like he has to prove how tough and unfeeling he is in order to get ahead. That’s why he’s so embarrassed of his severe sweet tooth, because he’s scared it comes across as “girly”. He’s by no means sexist but he definitely is over-anxious about not being perceived as “weak”.

- I’m sure he would absolutely adore waterfall :)

#ask lorel #anon #tcoti #casey #headcanon will you marry me slash jay

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makwandis · 1 year

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could you explain why you think gil is old prussia please? and maybe how that translates into his personality and stuff not really being entirely culturally germanic? I so deeply want to settle on something but havent arrived at a conclusion. Im curious about your take :) Thank you!!!!

yes totally! so i have...many many reasons

the first reason that really made me go with this idea is that i do not like the idea of giving like. "nation status" or legitimacy to uhhh insanely violent colonizing religious orders that happen to violently acquire land. like... it just doesn't make sense and i think is quite sinister? the teutonic order wasn't a culture, it wasn't an ethnicity, it wasn't a country. it was a military order that managed to dispossess people from their land and only existed on that land for a fairly brief period of time. it was an incredibly diverse order actually, in that their forces were varied and came from across europe. i also think- okay, we give one extremist militant religious group who dispossesses people from their land a nation, what then? do the groups that are similar to that that exist in recent times then get one too? i find that pretty fucky not gonna lie. it just doesnt add up, and if it does add up it means a lot of fucked up things haha. i just ask that people apply that logic to other violent religious groups....

i should note here i do nooooot give a fuck what himaruya says or anything about canon at all. who cares! not me haha

now a lot of people usually go with the idea of gil is born as the teutonic order and he kills old prussia and the teutonic order takes over. like. sure. however it's not historically accurate. the old prussians, while they suffered a genocide, were not all killed off by the teutonic order. they in fact made up a bulk of the teutonic's military force after the prussian rebellions in the late 1200s. this is a very complex aspect of the order and it's relations with prussians and other baltic groups who also fought with the order. this, and the fact that the old prussians themselves lived on. the language did not officially die out until the 1700s due to a series of plagues that ravaged east prussia, and while a lot of people did flee the territory many remained and were just exploited peasantry- while the prussian nobles converted and took up positions within the order. there were speared "barbarian" units of old prussians within the order! this and the order itself due to such a heavy baltic influence in fact was criticized and almost condemned a few times there due to pagan influence rising in their ranks (there were reports that the order began soothsaying, doing animal sacrifices before battle and even cremating their dead- all sins in the eyes of the christians). so, the teutonic order didnt just kill all the old prussians in one day. it was a lengthy assimilation process that was more or less complete loooong after the teutonic order no longer existed in prussia. and even despite the death of the old prussian language, old prussian culture heavily influenced the culture of east prussia- the dialect itself continued to have many words from old prussian.

i'm indigenous, so for me i think this whole killing off of whole nations thing in the process of colonialism to be a pretty problematic way of addressing colonialism in this universe.... my tribe has a similar story to the old prussians, many of our nobility ended up joining with colonial powers while the peasants remained peasants labouring under colonial powers. if someone were to depict this as spain or another spaniard having murdered off my tribe and then becoming mexico or something, i think that would be insaaaanely fucked. it was 500 years give or take a few of german occupation and settlement in prussia before the language officially died out- and its been over 500 years since 1492 and indigenous people are very very much still around. tribes exist without even having their language anymore, or just barely. one thing, i think old prussian culture lived on still and maybe even to this day- just quietly. under colonial occupation, colonized people usually keep their culture very very quiet haha. i'd add another few generations on to the point where the culture is officially said to have died out, but that's just me lol. so, i just don't think its an accurate nor necessary way of depicting that history and totally glosses over the complexities of the region and gives credence to unsavoury ideas regarding the relationship between colonizing powers and colonized people, i think

SO what about gil!

well in the way i see it. he would have had to adapt to german culture. this wouldn't have even happened really during the time of the teutonic order, considering how many old prussians were in their ranks towards the end there especially. i think it definitely would have been a horrific, traumatic process for him, but over time i imagine the order would have relaxed a little with him- if they were practicing pagan practices, why would they be punishing him for it in the end there? i think the way hes treated varies from grandmaster to grandmaster lol. some were willing to work with pagans, others were completely against it. depends greatly. so, i think his prussian culture would be a very large influence on him. i dont think he'd have had reason to leave east prussia/original prussian territories for a long time either. in my universe, i have him as being pretty fucking old (around 2000), and he's an adult actually by the time of the teutonic order (i don't age him down because like, why would he be little? the heyday of the prussians began long before the order arrived in their territory.). so he remembers a lot, and continues to spend a lot of time in his original territory. i think he ends up going down to berlin to join the hohenzollerns in the mid to late 17th century, when brandenburg prussia begins the process of becoming a kingdom and actually like doing stuff lol. so then by 1701, he's in berlin, but he's very east prussian. he's very baltic i think! so it's really only.... 300, 350 years that he has been in berlin? as opposed to a 500 year period of teutonic existence and then if he has lived before (as i think he has), however long he has been alive before then. so, i think he'd remember a lot and his original culture would have a big presence in his life and the way he is

thus, while i think he can adapt to germans and the way they are, balts to my understanding are certainly not germans. east prussians were a mix of those cultures. i am not european, so i could be totally wrong about that, but i think for the sake of an immortal non human dude i can also kinda do what i want a little haha. he adapts to germans but is he ever really a german? does he consider himself that? maybe publicly, so people don't bug him about things (like my point about colonized people keep their true cultures pretty quiet), but i think its really a matter of:

you can take the man out of the baltics but you can't take the baltics out of the man.

hope that explained, i'm open to any questions haha i have MANY THOUGHTS!!! i love researching pre christian baltic culture, its super interesting, and i HIGHLY reccomend the book the northern crusades by eric christiansen, i learnt a lot from it.

also want to say, if you go with the teutonic order is gil's origin story thing, there's no shame. this is just a silly fandom. you don't have to go in depth as exploring it as me, i am just insane. this is how it's fun for me, do what is fun for you. but i think we should also remember, these are real stories, and the way we depict things can reflect our current world a lot. sensitivity is still useful i think. but. its just a dumb fuckin anime we are all taking ideas from and changing as they want. have fun kids lol

#asks #well #there ya go LOL #500000000 words later #hws prussia #hws headcanons #yep #dis is just my most ndn way of seeing things lol

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bustyasianbeautiespod · 6 months

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trying think of how I would fix each of the minisodes to better connect them to the final fifteen. If I were to change as little as possible, then I think the job minisode stays the same, the Edinburgh minisode gets morally tweaked, and then the 1941 minisode focuses more on how bad of a situation crowley is in. Like make it more about Aziraphale wanting to get Crowley out of an unsafe life as a demon who’s actually quite good, so in the final fifteen it makes more sense why he would think making crowley an angel would help allow crowley to be himself and do good without punishment, even tho that’s not the point for crowley, like Crowley doesnt actively want to do Good like Aziraphale does, he just IS good, so sometimes does good things. Like the ending of the Edinburgh minisode is Crowley being punished for doing good and I think we could’ve expanded on that in 1941 if 1941 had to be about their relationship instead of Aziraphale’s relationship to the Heaven-Hell system like the previous two were. Like this aspect is there, Aziraphale being worried about Crowley is there but it’s not the focus. Hard Times Intro did better at establishing the idea of Aziraphale being scared for Crowley.

oh agreed like i think the two questions for aziraphale in the final fifteen are 1. why would he want to go back to heaven? and 2. why would he think crowley would say yes to being an angel? and i think those suggested tweaks help a lot! i would also shake up the order, i think? like i get that chronological makes sense, but i think that "a companion to owls" should've come last because it's the one that's most emotionally poignant and most related to aziraphale's relationship with heaven and his fear of loneliness, but once we hit 2.06 it's a bit of a distant memory while the completely useless 2.04 flashback is there in full force. 1941 minisode also could have focused more on their fear of being caught and the stress and pain of being on opposite sides. hard times cold open my beloved come back...

- Crystal :)

#asks

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familyagrestefanblog · 3 years

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Theory for “Gabriel Agreste”

Saying that I'm EXCITED for this episode is an understatement, I'm THRILLED! So let me give you my speculation for what could happen in it and how it’ll affect the future, because pieces are literally just falling into place in my brain and I just have to write this down.

The episode is called" Gabriel agreste" because in this episode Gabriel will create a (long time) Sentimonster for himself that'll take his place and cover for him in his civilian life while he himself gets completely swallowed by his Hawkmoth/ShadowMoth identity (which is a direct paralell to the fate Marinette just escaped by telling Alya her secret). He doesn't want to "waste" anymore unnecessary time by having to NOT be Hawkmoth, which then completely separates him from Adrien who very much was one of the last (if not THE LAST at this point) few strings that kept him grounded in his humanity.

The episode takes place right before the middle of the season and since it's season 4 we are talking about here its fair to assume that both Adrien and Gabriel are back at (at least) suspecting each other to be Chat Noir and Hawkmoth again at some point. Adrien is going to be even more rebellious after the status quo break and set up of "Lies" so him maybe (or maybe even confirmed already to Gabriel) to be Chat Noir could definitely be the factor that sets Gabriel over the edge, rips these two apart for good (as I foresaw in my analysis of "Jackady") and brings Gabriel to distance himself altogether while covering his own identity from his son by creating a Sentimonster (bc Adriens secret being discovered by his evil family is already forshadowed to hell and back, just like him ending up getting Homeschooled again this season, mark my words)

---

"Queen Banana" is supposed to take place right before "Gabriel Agreste" and we have a leak where it's seen that Adrien is now kinda taking on Nathalies role since she is (supposedly) still bed ridden.

Seriously, just humour me here and stay with me. This would mean that Adrien would get to see and interact with his father much more often and Gabriel wouldn't be able to ditch everything and turn into Hawkmoth as easily as he was able to with Nathalie.

A cover up Sentimonster was actually already kinda forshadowed in "Party Crasher"

by introducing HoloGabe with the intention of providing Gabriel with alibis and to attend meetings etc for him in the future so Gabriel can invest more time into being Hawkmoth. But a Hologramm is not suitable for every occasion, which is where the Sentimonster comes into play.

At first Adrien wouldn't notice much off about his father and the few things he notices Adrien actually doesnt mind. If SentiGabe is really supposed to replace Gabriel as... Well, Gabriel, that also means as a FATHER and my money is on SentiGabe being created to be a better father than the original. SentiGabe does everything Adrien wanted his father to do in s1-s3: Join Adrien at dinner time, spend more time with him, is in general in better of a mood and not such an unpleasant dick and so on and so on.

Easy to say, Adrien basically welcomes the good change he always wanted in his "Father" with open arms and chooses to ignore things that seem suspicious and the always remaining gut feeling of something just being... off. This will collide with the unveiling of more of the family (+ Emilie) mystery which will for Adrien all continue to point at Gabriel as Hawkmoth because of one event that is likely to happen in episode 4.

I'm currently writing on yet another post about this topic in particular, so I will link it HERE for elaboration once I post it, but in short, I think Rena Rouge and the Grimoire secrets Marinette shears with Alya could be the catalyst of Adrien suspecting his father to be Hawkmoth again.

Adriens memories of the time he went through the Grimoire himself in "Volpina" would be triggered again after seing the Grimoire page Rena (honestly, quite recklessly) brings along into battle and from then on things will slowly pile up until Gabriel deflects from himself with SentiGabe in "Gabriel Agreste" (just like he did in “The Collector”)

People WAY to easily forget how ready and serious Adrien was in "The Collector" when he actually concidered his father to be Hawkmoth.

Keep in mind that Ladybug was only able to tell Chat Noir the weakest reasons of her suspicion against Gabriel (while the Grimoire being Guardian property was NEVER found out by Adrien... til NOW) that being Gabriels mysterious personality and the butterfly logo of his brand.

These arguments are weak because they are ONLY actually suspicious in the specific context of Gabriel being Hawkmoth. Once you have proof against that they hardly hold any ground anymore, hence why both Adrien AND Marinette so easily brushed off these points after seeing Gabriel akumatized. I mean, excuse a designer for choosing a BUTTERFLY as his logo when his last name is literally the name of a butterfly type. The fuck kind of accusation is that??

So I hope you understand that when I say that, yes, these reasons DID trigger further memories/realizations for Adrien in that moment

It simply was only the tip of the iceberg.

The fact that Adrien not only gave Ladybug the fucking benefit of a doubt and heared her out about accusing his FATHER of being HAWKMOTH and took it THAT seriously and wanted to find out if his father truly IS Hawkmoth means that Adrien very much sees his father as capable of being Paris villain Nr 1. This... understanding and acceptance of Gabriels nature already had to be in Adrien much prior to "the collector" to set it off like this. And while normally Adrien chooses to turn a blind eye towards his fathers bad qualities in favor of seeing Gabriels redeeming (and even the rare somewhat GOOD) qualities, Adrien only does so because he thinks Gabriel hasn't crossed the line yet that makes his father undeserving of these loving conciderations. But Gabriel being Hawkmoth IS CROSSING that line for Adrien and he immediately sets aside his remaining/choosen love for his heavily flawed father and willingly sees Gabriel for what he is.

Adrien already did it once with only a few somewhat solid reasons and the Grimoire being kept secret from him altogether,

So he will do it again, just this time the proofs and developments are supposed to stay for good.

---

This development would not only be forshadowed by "the collector"

But also by the episode "Ladybug". There Mayura used a Sentimonster version of Ladybug against Chat Noir, using their love against him. What she didn't know though was that Ladybug actually isn't in love with her partner (yet) which ended up with Chat Noir being put in the situation of having to decide which Ladybug he believes to be real.

Does he believe and hold onto Sentibug who returns the love he so desperately seeks in life or does he let go of his hopeful wish and accept the heartbreaking reality of once again not receiving his love in return from yet another person he holds so dear?

In "Ladybug" Adrien couldn't make that crushing decision yet (and don't clown in the replies about this, not only was the situation vastly different it's also a cruel thing to ask of Adrien) but as we are used from Miraculous by now, that episode was only the set up for future events.

What Adrien couldn't let himself believe about Ladybug and Sentibug he will have to FORCE himself to accept about his Father and Hawkmoth. Same set-up of the Sentimonster symbolising Adriens desperate and hopeful WISH what his loved one were vs the crushing, heart wrenching reality of what his loved ones actually ARE. Just that letting go of his wish for Ladybugs love didnt seem "necessary enough" for the mission to succeed so he just couldn't MAKE himself give her up whereas accepting and seeing that his father is Hawkmoth is going to be one of the most crucial sacrifices of the show, changing the game forever. So as horrible, cruel and soul shattering as this is, putting an end to his fathers villainous reign for the sake of the greater good is a reason worthy enough to force himself through his pain.Which brings us once again back to “The collector” (which seriously forshadows almost everything I love that episode), because there is ONE major aspect that episodes sets up like crazy

And that is:

And thats where we are heading now.

This entire time Adrien wanted his Father to behave more fatherly, spend more time with him and improve his explosive behavior but he always got disappointed over and over again. So how heartbreaking would it be if over the course of the second half of the season THIS would be the very reason why Adrien gets behind Gabriels secret? Because SentiGabe behaved too fatherly for Adrien to truly buy it in his heart and when forced to decide what he actually believes his father to be - like the fatherly Sentimonster or the villainous Hawkmoth - Adrien has to and WILL recognize and accept his fathers true nature and turn against him, as it has been set up for a LONG time now.

This season shit’s about to go DOWN!

#Miraculous #Miraculous Ladybug #Ml spoilers #Ml Theory #Ml season 4 #Episode: Gabriel Agreste #Adrien Agreste #Chat Noir #Gabriel Agreste #Hawkmoth #Agreste family drama #or tragedy #thats more like it #SentiGabe #I am so EXCITED for this episode!!!#Ml analysis

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emmarzhere · 3 years

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3am AU time: Sanders Sides Swap!!

Once again I can’t sleep due to my brain insisting it’s much more important to write down these ideas for a Light and Dark side swap AU than sleep, so 3AM TUMBLR RAMBLE IT IS BABYYYY!!!

So I wanted to try using traits already existing in each character to make their inverses, rather than just swapping traits or completely changing the character’s core values, and these are my initial late night ideas:

(Note: I saved this as a draft and revisited it in the morning / afternoon to make sure it all actually made sense and to add to it with a fresh mind)

(Extra note: I accidentally lost all my additions and the entirety of Patton’s and Virgil’s descriptions by refreshing the page, so it’ll now be written out again in a less formatted way. DAMN YOU TUMBLRRRR!!!!!!)

Roman:

My initial reaction was to make Roman “Pride”, and extend on his egocentric nature (like what is done with many Dark!Roman interpretations), however five minutes of laying in bed thinking about it later I found a trait I felt fit him better: Delusion.

This Roman could still be very much “Netflix kids and family”, living and trying to make Thomas live in a fantasy land where everything is always fine and dandy. This insistence of only seeing things through his figurative or not so figurative rose tinted glasses makes this Roman very naive and hard to get through to, and while on the surface appears very appealing to Thomas (when they first meet Thomas doesn’t understand why Roman counts as a dark side) can be very dangerous if Thomas leans too much into his ways of escaping reality, aka making Thomas a delusional person. The best part of this choice of trait for Roman is that I can still tie in his ego; delusions can be fuel people’s egos, and also to protect them from harsh realities, hence why Delusional works as a role for Roman.

While normally I see Dark Side Roman designed to be an evil prince or king, I decided to go for a more glamorous look which I think fitted my version more: Roman would wear a pristine black and red suit consisting of a red waistcoat, tie and trousers, a black button up shirt and black or red heeled boots. I also wanted his design to link to the white peacock (a rare type caused by a genetic mutation), so I topped off the outfit with either a vintage white shawl or a Cruella style coat (leaning towards Cruella because we know Roman and Disney!) with white peacock feathers attached (still trying to decide if I want Roman to have decorated the feathers with red and black accents or not), and a pair of literal rose tinted glasses to hide his white peacock eyes - pale blue with a glassy look to them which always gives the impression that he is far away, even when he’s not.

Finally his sword is replaced with a grandiose black walking stick with silver details, along with the handle being a silver peacock head (note: possibly detachable from the cane to reveal a silver knife?). I chose this as weapons like these in fiction are often used to appear innocent, only to reveal a hidden depth of skill and character; a description which I think applies well to Delusional Roman.

Extra note: Delusional Roman gets snappy, angry, or even threatening when people try to break him out of or correct him on his delusional ways, though he will often try to slip deeper into his fantasies than actually deal with emotional confrontations.

Extra extra note: Roman is incredibly jealous of his brother as he can’t understand why he’s been accepted despite Roman being the one who creates such wonderfully perfect worlds for Thomas to escape off into! He’s also jealous of how his brother doesn’t care what others think of his work and doesn’t seek validation from the others, not that Roman would ever admit that he does either of those things.

Patton:

So the 3 main aspects of Patton I felt would work best for a Dark Side are his destructive selflessness, his overly strong morale compass and how he encompasses many of Thomas’ more negative feelings.

I couldn’t decide whether to officially label him as “Denial” or “Repression”, but either way he holds a similar role: he represses his / Thomas’ negative feelings, as well as tries to push Thomas to do the morally right thing (as he still represents Morality, just not as his main trait) which almost always is the selfless option. It’s almost impossible to convince this Patton that his viewpoint is not necessarily the correct choice (he’s in denial that he as Morality can ever be in the wrong), and he becomes hostile when his views are continuously challenged.

The light sides see Patton as the main holder and cause of Thomas’ negative feelings (eg. makes Thomas act selfless and do things for others until he’s burnt out and depressed), and when Thomas is feeling these negative feelings Patton experiences them but more strongly to the point where the others have to force him out of bed (usually Logan) and take care of him until he and Thomas get out of the depressive slump. However once he’s out he will deny that he was the problem and begin pushing Thomas down the self-destructive path again.

While this Patton will deny his depression and many negative feelings, he is still not as upbeat as Happy-Pappy-Pal-Canon-Patton, matching more with how the side acts in more serious moments such as at the end of SvS redux. He will smile and comfort others, but laughter and puns are rarely seen.

Another thing about this dark side Patton is that he is very manipulative (a trait shifted from Janus to Patton), even if he doesn’t believe himself to be. He uses his role as “morale compass” to invalidate other’s opinions if they clash with his, and often emotionally hurts the sides he gets close to by caring for them and performing selfless acts for them to show his love (eg. makes breakfast for the other Darks sides every morning, goes out of his way to learn more about their interests so that they can have someone to talk to them about) followed by him simplifying complex morale dilemmas in a way that makes it appear that his option is the only correct one, making the others feel bad about their differing viewpoints (a bit like how Roman felt invalidated and morally wrong throughout SvSR as his views didn’t line up with Patton’s).

This Patton wears a worn out pale blue shirt with a fraying black jumper over the top, leaving only the collar of the shirt visible. He has frog features too; with blots of green skin scattered all over his body, slightly webbed hands and he croaks! The splodges grow larger the more emotion Patton represses. He also really doesnt like his frog features as they don’t align with the perfect image of himself that Patton has in his head, so he tries to cover them up as much as possible with his black jumper, pale blue gloves (leather ones as he tried woollen ones and his frog skin made them go sticky) and baggy trousers, although there isn’t much he can do to hide the blots on his face or his brown frog eyes....

(He’s also constantly worn out as frog-pops has no clue what self-care even means)

Extra note: Patton goes through a sort of alternate character development to canon Patton, where as he begins to be accepted by some of the Light Sides and Thomas they discuss how he doesn’t just represent Thomas’ negative feelings, but all of his feelings; a lot of them are just also accidentally repressed alongside the “bad” feelings. As time goes on Patton becomes more cheerful and goofy, even dropping the occasional dad joke, although never quite to the levels of canon Patton.

Extra extra note: The happier this Patton is, the less faded the blues on his clothes become (much like Virgil’s eyeshadow), until at moments of peak happiness his gloves and shirt are canon Patton blue (eg. when Thomas is with Nico, or when Janus and Thomas first accepted him). Cute blue embroidered designs also form on his black jumper at peak happiness, such as butterflies, simple cats, pawprints and frogs.

Logan:

So Logan is the only side I have decided to leave with the same official trait title: Logic, although he also has the orange trait Anger within him. He will also be taking the place of Virgil as the Dark Side who is prematurely accepted.

However Logan here is still different from canon Logan: he represses and denies his emotions even more than canon due to the other dark sides attitudes towards him (Delusional Roman in particular does not appreciate the truth bombs and logical reasoning the calculator watch drops), leading to more angry outbursts / orange showing through. This makes Logan a horribly unstable side, with him appearing completely apathetic to any sort of feeling for an undetermined period of time until he next reaches his limit and has an explosion of rage - he holds both Logic and Anger/Orange in him here, but the anger shows through a lot more due to his circumstances.

His clothes are always shredded and falling apart due to him tearing them when he’s angry + the rage can come out like an explosion that wrecks everything in his surrounding area, including the clothes on him. He sticks to plain black t shirts and trousers to start with as he claims he doesn’t see the point in putting effort into an outfit as he has no desire to please others.

However when Thomas starts making videos Logan can’t help but show up from time to time. He is unsure why as he could not care less what Thomas or the idiotic “Light Sides” think of him, though he figures while he’s there he might as well educate the buffoons so they can reach more informed, educated conclusions to their constant dilemmas.

At first the Lights don’t take his presence well, and more times than one he’d leave towards the end of an episode to explode in the privacy of his room. But surprisingly they eventually start listening to him, considering his inputs, and Logan leaves filming shoots satisfied, even popping into the Light Side’s area occasionally outside of filming days to talk to them.

However Logan notices a pattern as time goes on: the more he’s around the Light Sides, the less he goes Orange. He tests it by spending a week only hanging with the Lights and finds that his anger barely built up at all. Logan quickly reaches the conclusion that his orange trait isn’t actually uncontrollable, it’s how the others treated him that made it so hard to act civil. That is what leads to Logan hating the Dark Sides (much like canon Virgil does) and finally joining the lights.

Soon after being accepted Logan has an outfit change, where he goes from his burnt, tattered rags to his canon outfit, as he finally feels stable and appreciated enough to trust himself in not ruining a nice new Logic outfit. From then on his journey is about accepting that he has feelings and learning that they’re valid.

Extra note: Logan’s worst fear is the idea of going Orange in front of Thomas or the Light Sides - he finally has people who listen to him and if they see his orange side it might scare them off or they’ll lose any respect for him they had. Worst of all they could get hurt…

Extra extra note: Neither Thomas or any of the Light Sides apart from Janus are aware that Logan holds the Orange trait, believing that he only ever was Logic, just more apathetic to start with (and they actually all buy his reasoning of his old outfit being trashed due to him not caring enough about appearances to fix it, to Janus’s dismay but not disbelief - a bunch of himbos, the lot of them!).

Virgil:

Virgil still represents the “Fight or Flight” response in this AU, just without the excess Anxiety. His official title would be “Instinct”, and he would be more confident than canon Virgil. The decrease in anxiety would also make him better at making rational decisions, though he would still freak out and make not-so-great choices in stressful situations.

Rather than a spider, I decided to link this Virgil more strongly with a cat, with heightened senses, lightning reflexes and eyes that reflect light much like a cats. These additions also match with his change of aesthetic from patchwork emo to fantasy vigilante mixed with bright purple punk, plus the addition of purple eyeshadow applied actually correctly. I made this choice as both canon and this Virgil see themselves as a protector of Thomas, yet Virgil is still slightly more morally grey than the other 2 Light Sides (sort of like canon Logan) hence a darker design. Plus is it really Virgil at all if he doesn’t spend his free time listening to MCR?

Virgil also takes the role of canon Roman when it comes to Patton being accepted: he initially falls strongly for Patton’s caring qualities, with the Dark side helping sooth his anxious moments and suggesting that Thomas make other non-selfish options that don’t make Virgil feel as anxious as some of Janus’ options. So for Patton’s first few conflicts Virgil sticks up for him, claiming he’s not all bad. Then he witnesses how Patton’s selfless choices affect Thomas and realises he’s been manipulated; there was no reason to go all the way with Patton’s choice and hurt Thomas, yet Patton had convinced him that it was either his way or the wrong way, no compromises available.

So by the time Patton reveals his name Virgil really dislikes him and makes a snarky remark in which Patton replies with a jab at how he didn’t realise being Thomas’ protector meant that you could be as evil as you wanted with none of the consequences. Virgil’s equivalent line to Roman’s hero one could be something like “Don’t you trust me?” or “I thought I was your best friend?” - then again Roman’s hero line does work with this version of Virgil.

Janus:

This was one of the easiest traits to decide: with a lot of his more manipulative and deceitful traits being distributed between Patton and Roman, Janus is officially titled “Self-Preservation”, and while he doesn’t claim the father role like Patton does, he is still very much seen as a parental figure and guiding light for Thomas and the lights. He tries to be warm and welcoming to the Light sides (part of his role is to take care of Thomas, hence taking care of the parts that make Thomas), and they naturally gather around him as he gives off a safe aura.

However he is not quite as kind to the Darks - he still has the role of managing what truths Thomas can handle, so he controls which sides stay hidden from him. The darks being revealed tends to be down to him slipping up or the side finding a way around his defences more than by him deciding Thomas is ready to meet them, and each time it happens he beats himself up over it and tries to work harder to not let it happen again. The problem he doesn’t realise is that the slip ups tend to happen in the first place due to him overworking himself to make the others / Thomas happy - he doesn’t quite perform the self-care he preaches about.

I’m still not quite sure where I want to go with Janus’ outfit: the initial thought was to put him in a more Patton inspired attire, however this is still Janus, and he is still a theatrical boi. I ended up settling for a mainly cottage-core aesthetic with a flowy long sleeve yellow shirt made out of a light fabric, brown trousers and an overly large sunhat. He also drapes himself in bright patterned shawls and wraps (still predominantly yellow in colour) as while he doesn’t look as snake-like as he canonically does he still has certain snake traits, such as a weakness to the cold and a yellow tint to his left eye.

However snake features do begin to form later on into the AU as Thomas’ views on Lights and Darks alter over time: he begins to realise that despite how it appears Janus is not always in the right, such as how if it hadn’t been for mistakes Thomas would never have met the Darks and learnt to grow as a person - in fact if Self-Preservation got the say in everything he would likely do little growing whatsoever. He and in turn the other Lights begin to find Janus too stifling until SvSR happens where under the stress Janus becomes a true snake boi. The scales and proper snake eye don’t fade afterwards due to Thomas’ subconscious change in perspective, and while it is a big new insecurity at first over time Janus learns to accept these new changes to himself and the Mindscape, and begins adding a touch of darker mystical aesthetic to his look (slightly fantasy fortune teller based) to match his new look better - although cottage-core remains his go to!!

Extra note: In this AU Janus is definitely the side that would most likely be seen going around the Mindscape in a dress (Roman would also wear dresses on occasion but mainly only within his daydreams in the Imagination); he is all about taking care of yourself, and that includes wearing what makes you happy! Though I’m still kind of tempted to put him in a dress full time...

Extra extra note: while Janus is very much the “adult figure” in the Light Mindscape, he still has his goofy moments like in canon - in general he is more relaxed and jokey with the others...though he’s still a sarcastic shet.

(I struggled finding images that matched at all with the ideas in my head, so take these as very vague links to the actual design)

Remus:

Oh boy, Remus is a fun one...

So now that Roman is the twin known by a different title (like how canon Remus is referred to as “Intrusive Thoughts”), Remus now has claim to the Creativity role!! However Remus isn’t going to do a 180 personality wise - he’s still going to be a chaotic gremlin, just with a light side twist.

His design is purposely all over the place: his aesthetic is mainly pirate based with a long sleeve pirate shirt, loose black trousers and heeled black and silver pirate boots, alongside a dark green pirate jacket and slightly brighter bandana. However he has other seemingly random elements thrown in there, such as a white and green hero cape (fuck what Edna says) coming off the back of the coat, and random colourful potions in the green belt under his coat alongside a knight’s sword. This mismatched look is due to the type of imagination Remus provides: while he still represents and creates intrusive thoughts, he also creates adventure stories and life goals/dreams for Thomas, hence takes a form that has mixed elements from Thomas’ self-inserts and protagonists for said stories. While he personally loves his messy design (do you know how much fun can be had with magic potions, swords, tentacles, and a day in the Imagination? Remus sure does), it does cause some arguments between him and Logan over how illogical him and his ideas are (like canon Roman and Logan).

Roman makes this Remus....uncomfortable. Not necessarily because of his ideas (those are just dull and vomit-worthy in his opinion), but because of how he can’t separate dreams and reality - while Remus loves coming up with Imaginative stories for Thomas and setting slightly outlandish goals for the future, he has a level of awareness that Roman lacks in how he knows Thomas won’t ACTUALLY end up being a morally grey pirate travelling the seas to claim back the magical pendant of octopus powers (unless...). He’s also uneasy with how easily Thomas can fall for Roman’s delusions of grandeur and romance, in fact it opens up quite a major insecurity on how despite being the “good” twin his brother seems to succeed more as the creative role, eg. how Thomas will come up with a dream future career path, husband and even car in a matter of seconds yet Remus has to slave and hone in on decent ideas for weeks to reach his own standard.

This leads to another thing about Remus: while he doesn’t care what others think of his ideas (the trait I mentioned earlier that Roman was jealous of) he hold a high standard to himself and gets extremely happy when he perfects an idea. Besides he still wants his ideas to actually be used by Thomas as them being dismissed for not being good enough does hurt (a bit like how Remus got frustrated in the recent episode with how his “good” intrusive creations were being torn apart by Logan’s methods).

Extra note: The fact that Thomas doesn’t like or appreciate some of his darker ideas / intrusive thoughts doesn’t bother Remus too much as he tends to put less effort into them as he knows they won’t be liked - he just can’t help that they pop into his head and he has to get them out - repression is bad after all! However maybe there can be some episode drama about Remus wanting to be less stifled and have Thomas at least consider some of his more mature themes that he thinks would be good to expand upon.

Extra extra note: Just assuring the fact that Remus not caring what the others think about his work does not correlate with him not caring about the others. He loves his fellow Light Sides and Thomas - he’s just confident in his own craft and while appreciates advice and improvements from the others (he and Logan have a field day on creating biologically accurate gore together) he also is aware that HE is Creativity, and he understands his craft better than the others.

Extra extra EXTRA note: Wasn’t really sure how to put it in there but Remus still represents Thomas’ lust. Do with that what you want.

Thomas:

So all these changes to the sides....of course it has it’s effects on character!Thomas! However I’m getting REALLY tired now so this will be done in bullet points:

Not as Disney-centric as canon/real Thomas.

Has less issues with Anxiety, and more issues dealing with Depression

His morals start off a bit more flexible than canon due to always having we-live-in-a-society Janus as his guide

Still has intrusive thoughts, but not as debilitating with the lower levels of anxiety and the much better relationship with Remus.

Still overworks himself trying to help others (nice one Patton!)

Might have a different career due to Roman being more out the frame - maybe goes into writing instead with Remus’ more diverse form of creativity.

Does explore more diverse creative ideas and darker themes, but still out of habit sometimes puts down possibly good ideas as on surface level they appear too morally wrong.

However could possibly be in a non-creative career, and his major longing for a new career path could be what allows Roman through for the first time.

Less dad jokes but still incredibly goofy with both Remus and Janus being more present.

I think I’m going to wrap up there for now! I may make some art for this at some point, but I also want other’s opinions and ideas for this AU.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading!!

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dyketubbo · 3 years

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my ask didnt send i am going to murder. anyway BEEP CLASSPECTING... now im thinking abt that and aimsey. from the top of my head/only briefly thinking, beep as rage or void vibes with me? (obvs not the typical rage player you see, more like the nuance we were discussing). and aimsey as a life player?

oooo void beep would be suuper cool :oc rage too, he is very fucking stubborn and does have outbursts rather often (also rage players in canon usually have connections to magic, and then the homestuck rage players all had religious themes so, god stuff). meanwhile void fits beeps heavy "this is all irrelevant and you could never understand any of this", and his own belief that even what he does just doesnt matter. personality under a veil (not necessarily a facade), fundamental inability to understand and truly perceive it all.

id say he doesnt fit rage enough, if only because rage players are fundamentally about survival instinct, and, well. beeps already dead, and he seems to be perfectly fine with the fact that one day he just wont exist at all. hes not scared, though he is easily pissed off, but in the end he just sort of likes messing with shit and being in control. lil dickhead (affectionate)

honestly, since he almost fits rage but not quite, he.. almost acts like a prince of hope (unfortunate eridan kinnie). destroying beliefs and asserting his reality as the Absolute Truth, dragging others like aimsey into his delusions and being in a situation where aimseys putting her faith into him even though hes not a good person because she feels the need to believe in him and connect with him, because she genuinely feels like hes the only friend they have left, and because aimsey wants desperately to believe in what beep is trying to show her, desperately wants to understand. he shuts down things he believes to be false, to the point where he can make them false by simply destroying the problem.

hes a force of outward destruction, destroying what he believes to be flaws in others. theyre heavily defensive, putting everyone beneath them, believing hes the one thats doing it Right, and ultimately, he believes its his right to control things. he doesnt trust anyone, he reacts to any fear he may have with anger, lashes out, and the "TELL. NO ONE" scene almost showcases beep shattering and hurting aimsey before he steps back and give a quick "sorry!". his arc seems to be leading up to him realizing he can care about aimsey, that he can trust her to believe him and in him, and he seems to be dealing with the concept of trusting aimsey with his beliefs

hes definitely not a general hope player, but specifically prince of hope could fit. onto possible void class combos, with, first, the notable fact that we dont know what kind of person beep may have been in the past, other than that he was destructive. we know about some events in his past, and how he feels about them (kinda), but generally, this means hes very versatile and has many class possibilities, depending on how we want to interpret what we do know.

for example, he could be a maid whose now in the apeshit stage, stubborn and repressive. its entirely possible he got so tired of listening to the other spirits that he got to the unhealthy stage, exploded, and now without anything stopping him, hes doing whatever the fuck he wants, because hes decided none of it matters, that its all irrelevant and he doesnt have to care because its his fucking universe and no one can stop him from playing god. he spends his time doing menial things, because to him, its all equally unimportant, so why not waste time? he cuts down unnecessary tasks, weeds out what he finds useless, etc etc. basically, he should still be independent, but he needs to be brought back down to earth (metaphorically), because hes kind of burnt himself out and is now fucking with things because he feels none of it matters anyways

sylph of void sort of works too, mainly his meddling and tendency to shut down anything that could reveal something he doesnt want revealed, as well as shutting down others viewpoints and he covers up shit whenever he wants. his motivations are, really, mostly unknown to us, other than that he seems to think this is fun. otherwise, he also has a tendency to try and fix things he thinks needs fixing (like getting rid of fairies and space creatures), and will often try to fix mistakes he sees in mortals. however, slyphs are ultimately healers, and beep just. is not a healer, and he doesnt necessarily invite creation of void in any way, since void isnt really destruction of anything, and what he does invite is destruction of things. hes also just too active to be a slyph

so, with the previous prince assession, theres also the possibility of him being a prince of light, which would mean he would act more like a void player. hed destroy light with light, destroy the importance of information with information. they strip away the importance of things, uses plain fact to force the perception that nothings really important. he dismisses the importance of things, purposefully acts ignorant to draw away from what he knows, destroys knowledge itself from a power standpoint (wiping aimseys memory), and in extreme cases, can physically destroy anything in his way, or assert over and over that what he said/did isnt real, that nothings true or important other than what hes saying. again, little shit. if i had to make up my mind, i think prince of light fits the most

as for aimsey, i think life does fit him really well, shes definitely got the similar "girl next door" kind of vibes, while still being really interesting in her own right. she definitely starts out as a typical fictional life player, enthusiastic, energetic, genuine, wanting to effect the world. shes a normal girl (and this isnt an insult, rather, her being so normal ties the magical themes of the bear smp together really well, and its a perfect way to use a life player, make them be a catalyst for both the normal life player and eccentric others to shine). however, as she struggles with losing trust in bear and not being treated well, not having anyone that cares about them specifically, the energy starts to falter, but comes back when they feel the need to be rebellious. notably, while aspects arent super literal, she contrasts beep so much in just how alive she is, which fits her being a life player rather well. except, as i said, aspects arent literal, which means aimsey being a life player translates to her showing what life means in a metaphorical sense.

life is about agency. its about what you do, your ability to do so, its about asserting your will. not what drives you, but simply you doing at all. interesting enough, life players can be hard to pin down because life is about desire and agency, while the players class defines their ideology. life players can become obsessed with an idea that they need to do something, that they need to change how systems work, and often can cloak their want to fulfill their individual desires as altruistic want to fulfill others needs and desires (i.e., aimsey wants a friend and someone who pays attention to her and is genuine towards her, she feels like shes found that in beep, and as such starts to cloak her want to be his friend as aimsey wanting to help beep rather than aimsey themself).

as for said class.. this was, hard. because of how heavily influenced life is by the class its paired with, and because aimseys arc right now is trying to deal with feeling like shes too much and unneeded, it means that i have to really consider how that connects with which classes struggles. so, i ended up with sylph. aimsey is a creator, and she tries to heal as well. "allowing creation/healing of life or inviting creation/healing through life". from a literal standpoint, she tries to help bear heal by trying to get him to open up, to live, to make friends and interact with people. this could almost seem like a blood player move, but while a lot of aimseys arc is about bonds and relationships, shes not really a strong connecter or leader, shes just good at inspiring others to be, to her own detriment.

also notably, unhealthy sylphs crave, whether craving more of their own aspect, or craving another aspect when they feel theirs is not enough. aimsey talks a lot about how she grew up doing things by her lonesome, and now that she feels like people are moving on without her, she may be craving blood (that sounds so awful out of context). she wants attachments, wants to be the person that brings everyone together, but.. she isnt, not in a way thats appreciated. and due to her insecurities, she sees this as a flaw within himself, and as something to fix. so, she latches onto beep, and desperately tries to have as much of an effect on their life as they do on hers. like life players in general, sylphs try to solve their problems under the guise of helping someone else with theirs. currently, aimsey seems to be trying to find what she needs to do, because when she tried to do what she thought she needed to do, she (from her perspective) failed, so now shes trying to make up for her perceived failure within herself by trying to help herself through helping beep. i would think into it even more but i think its probably best to just leave it here KEKW

#angel answers #long post #im afraid to count the paragraphs on this one tbh #i dont think its That Much but it felt like it #beep bsmp #aimsey #bear smp #bsmp classpecting #hs

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grungegoths · 3 years

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why do u think sakura is disliked so much by naruto fans?? like she isnt the only badly written female character of naruto whose abilities arent utilized for most of the series or who has to be rescued by the male characters literally every female character in naruto has that thing going for her. Why only sakura and those neverending and annoying memes about her being "weak" or "useless" or ppl just plain bashing her i just dont get it

hi anon ! im quite new to the naruto fandom so cant exactly pinpoint all of the reasons of the hate she gets (some of which might be reasonable too) but from what ive seen its mostly male fans who seem to hate her alot for which im sure is bc of the following reasons :

1. She doesnt have a character design which can be sexualized by the male audience and doesnt particularly have any “fanservice” moments/outfits in the entire series (as far as im aware). I feel like this is the main reason she is hated but most of men who hate her wont admit it lol. Im fairly certain if they made sakura’s hair longer and gave her big boobs skinny waist look with clothes showing her cleavage etc most of these male fans wouldnt be hating her this much.Theyre just unhappy that shes the main female character of the series but cant even be sexualized by them

2. She doesnt have a personality and abilities which are appealing to most male fans .Sakura isnt a submissive, gentle, shy, quiet girl who keeps her feelings to herself unless the moment requires her to express them for a male character’s love interest.Shes open, brash, short tempered ,talkative and expresses her emotions and feelings freely no matter weather people around her are fine with them or not. If she likes someone she tells them even if she might get rejected and if she dislikes someone she isnt afraid to stand up against them which lot of male fans dont like. Also the fact that shes so physically strong that she can chuck huge boulders around and destroy iron boulders and houses by sheer force of her strength alone when other male characters like naruto need external powers like sage mode/nine tails power etc to do the same feat isnt easily acceptable by them either

okay this is getting kinda long so im putting a read more tag underneath

3. She’s unnecessarily violent towards other male characters : Okay i myself dont like this aspect of her much either. ik female characters hitting male characters out of nowhere is a running gag in most anime and even though most of the scenes of sakura hitting naruto are actually part of naruto fillers, i still think that unless the male characters are being very shitty/pervy towards a female characters there is no need to have the female characters being violent towards the male characters as a way to show that they are “strong”. Unnecessary violence is unnecessary violence no matter what gender does it so if anyone dislikes anime sakura bc of that i get it

4.She gets in the way of their ship/doesnt end up with the person they wanted her to end up with. Alot of fans who wanted naruto to end up with sakura hate her for choosing sasuke over naruto since naruto was the main hero and he was in love with her for the majority of the series so according to their mentality its the hero would should have “won” the main female character in the end and not the rival .Of course some of them just wanted them to end up together bc naruto was nicer towards her but the former ones hate her more bc of this.Some people who ship sasuke and naruto together hate her bc of the traditional “female character gets in the way of their m/m ship” misogyny since she ended up with sasuke but its not a large number since most of the sns fandom recognizes that it was the fault of heteronormativity not the female character for the endgame pairings. Alot of naruto and hinata shippers hate her bc naruto had more moments and chemistry with sakura than he did with hinata .

5.That fake confession during the 5 kage summit : Idk why people hate her bc of this but alot of people do for some reason bc “she played with naruto’s feelings” etc etc when she was literally guilt tripped into thinking that SHE and naruto’s promise to her was the reason why naruto was making himself suffer bc of sasuke (which wasnt true) and she wanted to stop naruto from endangering himself while running around looking for sasuke.Was her decision stupid?yes was it deserving of hate and as bad as people act like it is?no lol

6.She is underutilized af : I wont say she’s useless but aside from the sasori fight she really does not get to showcase her fighting abilities throughout the rest of the series even when the moment required it or she COULD showcase them.In part one she didnt have much abilities so had to constantly rely on naruto and sasuke to get herself out of danger and in part 2 despite being strong af there still are moments where she could at least attempt to fight back a little but had to again rely on naruto and sasuke again to save her .But that isnt exactly her fault the author just didnt let the female characters shine alot in the series and its more apparent in case of sakura since shes the main female character

I feel like thats pretty much it?i dont agree with 90% of sakura hate tbh it comes from a place of misogyny and bias but some people also just dont like her bc she simply isnt written in a good way and thats fair.

#gods this ended up being so long fhgfhgfhfh once i start i cant stop #naruto #sakura #sakura haruno #text

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heyjude19-writing · 3 years

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Im the list anon again and boy do I have more for you but this time I also have some questions as well if your time allows and you are willing to answer of course. First with the other things I loved:

1) the fact that Ron warmed up to Draco so quickly! I genuinely think thats so much in character. Ron is not a distrustful person and as a middle child as they come is very easygoing and would for sure make stupid jokes at Draco

2) The patronus. My god the Patronus. I seriously put the phone down and made a small slow clap during that chapter. At first I was like hmmmm *insert unsure kombucha girl face* because almost all fanfics have him with a dragon patronus and leave it at that (and lets be honest at this point my expectations of you were quite high dont blame me blame your bloody brilliant writing) but then, and I dont know if you did this on purpose or not (I have a feeling you did) but the fact that the dragon was the same (pale white) wounded but still feral dragon that Hermione FREEED (!) from a bank (£££) dungeon, malnourished and used for its nature, surrounded by darkness, wealth and misery!! And it was Hermione who broke its chains!!!!! Is just *chefs fucking kiss* slow clap*

3) the way you describe sex scenes are so natural! Ive never read a fanfic or book that doesnt make me gag a little bit (I am not a fan of smut at all but ill go with it because of a good story) until I read yours. Its so simple but yet intricate and you make the entire act so intriguing and normal and intimate. Bravo.

4) I LOVE SASHA. I love that Theo fell for her head over heels and the way you portrayd her reminded me of a friend of mine who works as a sous-chef in London so I always pictured her when reading it!

5) Dracos inner voice is ON POINT. Like I genuinely think you shoud own the rights to that character now.

6) Ill say it again. I love Ginny. You should also own the rights to her character too.

7) my interest for Quiddich (even when reading the books/wathcing the movies) was on par, if not lower than Hermiones. You managed to get me interested in that too so yes another slow clap to you

7.1) Also such a clever career for Draco!! Made si much sense!

Now to some questions

A) What was the deal with Malfoy referring to Ginny as Weasly and refusing to aknowledge her Potter surname. And why did everyone kept correcting him? It was hilarious granted but I wanted to know whether the reason you included this time and time again had to do wih something deeper? Or was this included as just a funny recurring joke?

B) Why did you choose for Draco to have a “fantasy” to produce a patronus and not for example for him to have had to do that after theyd exchanged “i love yous”. Very interesting angle and i liked that it was sort of a loophole to all the ‘death eaters cant have patronuses’ but quite curious on the thought process

C) Why did you opt for Draco to remove his mark? Do you think that stands as reward for him more or for Hermione? Very smart solution by the way

D) if you have the time- Could you please elaborate a tad more on what the soul-bonding means? Why was it so taboo? At furst hand it seems like a very romantic/amazing thing to do with your partner right?

Lastly- Do you ever itch to make a second part to this? And in the most acceptable case that you dont, I always wondered what you had in mind for them in the future- because of the soul bonding thing, you mentioned that the generational curses will be erased, which means I guess that the Malfoys can have more than one child now, and girls as well. (I cannot believe im asking for this as I am the one to avoid any pregnancy fanfics but) do you imagine them with children and if yes, how many? How do they integrate muggle devices(I know youd agree wit me that Hermione would definitively bring some muggle stuff over!) and which devices would Draco really secretly like?

Pleasewriteasecondpartwhereyouelaborateyourthoughtsonthisthankyou.

Ok rant done. :D

List anon! You’re back with another amazing ask. I’ll do my best!

1.) I like to think Ron matured a lot post-war (not enough to stop making terrible jokes, though.)

2.) Regarding your beautiful analysis of my specific dragon breed for Draco’s patronus: How many points would you like for your Hogwarts house of choice? I will add that according to Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, the Ironbelly’s scales are normally a metallic grey. I will also add that I subscribe more to book canon than movie canon. In the book version of events of the Gringotts escape, Harry breaks the chains and Hermione (with eventual help once the boys catch on) destroys the ceiling so it can have a way out. The partially blind dragon does the rest of the work on its own.

3.) Thank you, that’s very flattering.

4.) Does your friend also get you into fancy restaurants and can they make salted caramel bread pudding???

5.) Thank you, it was one of my favorite aspects of writing this story.

6.) Thank you, she’s so fun to write and flesh out from her book portrayal.

7.) Haha, I felt so validated by that line of dialogue in Cursed Child when Draco tells Harry he wanted to play quidditch professionally, but wasn’t good enough.

Now to some answers:

A.) It’s definitely a recurring joke. It’s up to the reader to interpret Draco’s actions here: is he doing it to be a massive troll? Or is he genuinely not retaining the information of her married name because he considers this fact so unimportant that he does not bother to keep it in his brain? Troll, snob, or both, you can decide!

B.) I’ll address the second part of this first, because it was not intended as a loophole. I 1000% do not understand the “death eaters can’t have patronuses” thing. It makes absolutely no sense. Snape has a Patronus. But beyond that… Umbridge has a Patronus (a cat). If we’re letting that woman have a Patronus, then yeah, I think Draco can cast one. As for the vision that Draco used to conjure it… up to you whether that’s a fantasy or a glimpse of a certain ritual actually working. Draco’s thoughts on the matter: “An image of such striking tangibility that he might have already lived it, or perhaps experienced time in such a way that he lived it now.”

C.) I wanted Draco to have a choice, obviously a recurring theme for him in RN. For my characterization of him, that symbol on his arm causes him nothing but shame and self-loathing (see the end of chapter 36 during his heart-to-heart with Hermione). He’d already exercised almost every known avenue to rid himself of it before Hermione entered his life (he lists these in chapter 44). Hermione already loved him (and has told him so) by the time she’s figured out how to remove it: “I love the man you are today and I will love that man tomorrow, bare forearm or not. I simply wanted you, for once, to have the choice. It’s your body.”

D.) Ooh anon, you are tempting me here. I really hate to be coy, but you might see some future writing on this very topic.

I can at least answer the taboo part: I think soul magic in general (horcruxes, the use of unicorn blood) is quite taboo in the HP universe. As no one knows what happens after death (not even ghosts, Nearly Headless Nick says as much when Harry asks him point-blank in OoTP) I think most magical folk would think the intense ritual (blending magical cores) an unnecessary thing anyway. As Draco explains in chapter 48, since no one actually knows the effects or if it works, it’s considered a bit over-the-top since it’s probably futile anyway. It is also not a Vow with a death component; Narcissa is obviously alive in this story even though Lucius is already dead. I wrote the generational curse protection theory in as a dig at Cursed Child for the way they handled Astoria’s character.

The idea of it I think is romantic, but I will stress it is very dependent upon the intent of the two participants. To quote Draco in chapter 48 again: “To twine one’s soul to another showed a willingness to not only physically tether one’s self during your time here on earth, but to commit to a blending of your magical cores, putting faith in your magic to recognize its bonded counterpart in another life. Should other lives even exist.”

If you re-read Draco’s experience during the bonding ceremony in chapter 51 (starting from this bit: “The cognizance of his own powers never felt sharper, more familiar, but suddenly another power pulsed within to join with his.”) you might find it bears a resemblance to the trajectory of their relationship.

Lastly- I’ve left Draco and Hermione to their wedded bliss. I’ve got nothing planned for them beyond where they are in the final lines of chapter 51. I don’t have that itch to write more into their future because it would feel forced. Draco laid out his two envisioned futures with Hermione in chapter 48 when they discuss having or not having children. They are happy and content in the life they chose together. That’s all I ever wanted for them.

You will see more from this story though. I have an entire series of one-shots and outtakes from the published Remain Nameless timeline that I’ll start posting soon.

Thank you so much list anon! These were fun to answer!

#remain nameless #dramione #list anon #asked and answered

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morceauoleander · 3 years

Text

Min’s mind & DID

thinking of DID i have some notes i wrote a couple days ago regarding my OC min and how their mind works with their DID! remember this is based off me, and Min is also a polyfragmented system with many sub systems!

while i have a lot of this written down, even Min’s alters names dont really come up outside. they are just Min. they are affected by some fronting but they are also very far into therapy and have many coping mechanisms and skills to help them! theyre doing pretty well and no one really needs to be super aware of their DID on the outside at all, but a knowledgeable Psychic would recognize their disorder upon entering the mind.

its very hard to put together what min’s mind would be like, but i’d likely put it in “layers”

you have the “Front Room”. a small, and quite empty room in which most of the active alters of Min reside. Min is often co-fronting constantly as they’ve gone through therapy for years and have found ways to work together- that being they work together often and co front a lot due to their messy polyfragmented set up. this front room is the most “surface level” part of their mind, and you won’t reach the rest of it for a bit as you must navigate through a foggy black of nothing to get to the rest. this is a sort of dissociative barrier from everything else and you may not pop out the right end at first. it isnt supposed to be covered easily and most will not make it through without some kind of direction.

once through, you’ll tumble down a path and be opened up to a very undefined system of ‘bubbes’ and houses. called the “City Hub” this is the hub of everything else for Min’s system. in Min’s mind, it appears like a city walkway with buildings, houses, parks, etc in a sort of neon-like outline seen on figments but can flicker in and out of being full on 3D objects (they cannot be collected like figments btw) there are a few notable things: 1) ‘figment’-like outlined buildings and bubbles, bubbles that then lead to another “hub” like this - a sub system 2) many fragments... which are very much like ‘figments’ appearance wise but are sometimes capable of speech, fronting, and altering their in-mind appearance. 3) other defined alters, who may be dormant or are simply not at the Front- wandering around like any other person in a mind.

Min’s hub “flickers” into detail from time to time, as it kind of depends on how much mental energy they’re putting into being in the front. Its a lotta work keeping an eye on everyone back there and if they’re focused on the front they may not put a lotta that energy into the visual of their mind.

“sub systems” which appear as another hub like the main one, can be hard to reach sometimes as they can contain dormant alters or dissociative barriers that bar others from accessing it. it is NOT ever suggest one breaks through these barriers- while the Front’s barrier is trouble to get through, tougher barriers like ones blocking these sub systems can be like brick walls. Any psychic learning about dissociation will learn that dissociative barriers are not inherently bad, and that breaking them down can sometimes do more harm than good!

As Min is polyfragmented, their system is quite large, but it is hugely full of fragments. in-game i feel this kind of “messy” mind could be done with a sorta expanding path of the “main hub” being procedurally generated where it close gets less and less defined, maybe with some kinda forced perspective to make it seem never ending. No way would anyone get to explore all of Min’s mind, its too expansive and the further you go, the less defined stuff you’ll find and deal with.

Of course... there is the minds of Min’s alters. A sorta paradox situation, but the mind of the alters can be explored, but its just a smaller “room” inside what is already one person’s mind. its not another body or another brain. Most alter’s minds won’t be crazy big but they may look more akin to another non-dissociative person’s mind due to not being affected by the structure of the System and instead just displaying that one alter’s mind. im not even going to get into the concept of an alter having a system of alters, lets just stop there lol.

All in all, Min’s mind isnt too “weird”, just... expansive. and its almost like having your own massive team of psychics in your head, working as a group but also just living their lives. They have dissociative barriers held up in parts of their mind, and you’re unlikely to find a single memory vault of anything “traumatic” as those are safeguarded and kept far away. Min’s mind holds some typical things like doubt or bad moods, but censors do not work the same way! not in the same way. Min’s system does NOT hold typical roles like “gatekeeper” or whatever, as my system does not and i do not understand those concepts with my alters. here i will go into various Psychonauts’ world aspects that fit into min’s mind:

Alters & censors - Min’s mind does not have censors but rather alters who instruct censors. In a way one may think of panic attacks - not uncommon, but are usually tackled swiftly by alters who deal with them. if an alter who is fronting deals with them while fronting, usually when inside the mind it looks like the “time bubble” effect has been put over everything, but no one is slow. bad moods, bad ideas, doubts, judge - all work as they normally would. they may spawn because of another alter in the system too, as there are many who could get these thoughts. alters often work together to deal with them. baggage - there is a LOT of baggage but its greatly scattered around. when its found and dealt with, its gonna pop up again, somewhere else.

so who are Min’s alters...? well, thats big question considering their system size, and in actuality it doesnt really matter- my system is huge but we work collectively without much thought aside from some defined hosts. So, here are Min’s most defined hosts!

Koffee (he/they) - not unlike Min, and isn’t very old system wise, but he’s been co fronting since he formed and is almost never without Min. They and Min are often the ones to old the others together when fronting in more intense situations. Green (they/them) - quiet, a thinker. likes to be the logical one but can get consumed in things go wrong. they keep shit in line for sure, have been known to fall into panics if they arent fronting with a good partner. Sable (she/he/they) - a fun one no doubt. they’re the one who definitely falls into being a bit immature and overly friendly. people like her a lot no doubt, but she isnt the best judge in many situations. she gets shit done though, thats for sure. she enjoys company and she likes working. Root (he/him) - not unlike Sable, but not a fan of all the more social things they tend to lean into. they are casual, a bit humorous, and incredibly analytical. they are great at organizing things but can be a bit controlling about it.

all of them have varying skills they are good at psychic wise, but i dont have the energy to go into that now too.

so yeah. thats a lot of what goes on in min’s mind! if anyone has questions on things regarding it and DID let me know! pls remember this is MY experience with DID. this is not what it is for everyone else. other than the basic criteria, lots of this can vary!

#psychonauts #oc #pn oc #psychonauts oc #min

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oh-theatre · 4 years

Text

Just A Remnant Now

A/n: lmao this is so bad im so sorry,,, lmaooo ITS SO BAD

TW: Death, spirit, spit, farting, destroy, pain, graphic descriptions, ANGST, no happy ending

“Im sorry Remus I cant talk to you right now, its been months and I cant figure out where this spirit energy is coming from” Logan huffs. “Tomorrow is my presentation and if i have nothing to show for it my entire funding, this project crumbles” He rambles. Remus follows him, his feet carry a sweet lightness as he listens.

“What will they do with the spirit or ghost?” Remus questions, sitting on one of the cold benches focusing hard as he fiddles with something in his hand. A cold breeze as Logan snatches the tool away from him. “Hmph” Remus pouts

“My guess? Ill get a whole team of scientists! A whole new lab with facilities and so much more! And ill tear it apart and study every aspect” Logan beams, the glint in his eye sickened Remus.

“So you'll kill it?” Remus scoffs “Seems kinda brutal”

“No ill just...take it apart to...examine its..origins and what it can do and...its a ghost what does it matter Remus?” Logan inquires, typing viciously away at his keyboard.

“They still have feelings, their sensories are there!” Remus argues, feeling his face flush. “The way you plan to tear them apart is inhumane! Its against their will Logan, they are still forms of living.

“They are, in every sense of the word, not Remus. They are dead, figments of what used to be. They cant feel pain, or emotion, they are a remnant” Logan explains

“They are more than that! Lo you're not listening!” Remus stands now, Logan could be intimidating but Remus towered over the scientist.

“Im not listening because you don't know what youre talking about” Logans cold glare would pierce anyone but not Remus. “You're just my engineer.” He spits

Though i wish we could be more, both think in unison through their frustration.

“They have the memories of their old life, they have feelings, they have feelings of the world they must traverse through now as a spirit. They develop feelings, emotions, memories and more. They travel through to the middle ground between living and dead. If they accept it, they move on but some choose to stay!” Remus finishes, his breath cold as it spits on Logan. “Some don't have a choice! Some are tethered! But they aren't just ghosts Logan. They live in the now, through whatever means. Tearing them apart with my molecular design would kill them, and every ounce of pain felt would hurt just as much as it would to you.” Remus finishes, his body shakes, he tries his best to keep solid to the ground.

“You've developed emotions for these things” Logan rolls his eyes. His judgment was not missed. “And if im not mistake, its your device Remus” Logan reminds

“You're right...it is” He turns to where the device sits immaculate, his design perfect. Such as the mad genius he was. He took his work in his hands, feeling every ounce of metal and wiring that was in it. Then, in the flash of an eye, the machine crashed. It fell to the ground with the force of anger, Logans shock and frozen state was unmissable as the pieces clattered around the ground.

“What have you done” He whispers viciously. Remus stands triumphant feeling the pain inside.

“What I should have done as soon as I made it” Remus sighs.

“Why do you care so deeply for these things! You have no idea what they are or what they do!” Logan yells, his voice echoes through the lab.

“For how smart you are.. youre so fucking dumb Logan!” Remus argues back. “For months the same spiritual energy has been popping up on your monitor! You couldn't put two and two together?” He smirks. “You really think after your failed convention last year they would send you an engineer?”

“What are you saying” Logan breathes

“You're so dumb Logan!” Remus swipes an angered hand across the table, tools crash to the ground.

“Stop calling me that” Remus’s accusations had cut deep.

“You call me that at least once every hour!” The continue arguing, it hurts each of them more than can be described. Each new insult is a breach to the relationship they had built up over the past year. Finally Remus couldn't keep it in anymore. “Im the spirit Logan!”

the silence that fell through the lab was piercing.

“I didn't want to move on because fuck closure, so i found you. I liked what you were doing...or at least what i thought you were doing. But once i had built the machine i could have left...but I liked you Logan. Plus you hadn't found a spirit! I thought hey maybe this will be the final piece of the puzzle...” Logans speechless breaths were terrifying. Remus cant help but reach out, he focuses allowing his hands to solidify. He takes Logans hands. “Watch” He instructs, after a quick thought Logans hands fall through Remus’s hold.

“no no” He tries desperately to grasp to Remus, he wants to feel his hands. “No no lies lies all of it” He spirals, Remus just watches knowing this was inevitable. Remus feels a tug at his heart, he works quickly and the machine is one again. Logan remains at his desk, murmuring nonsense.

“Lo?” Remus for all his chaos, had the softest voice. “Take me...to the demonstration tomorrow” he offers. Logan looks up finally, his eyes red from thoughts. “I was just another chess piece for your game, just use me...i don't think i wanna stay around much longer anyway” He sighs.

“No Remus. We have to stop this project.”

“what?” Remus barely breathes.

“I was wrong...I was wrong and so misguided.” Logan admits, he has no idea if his next move would work but he takes Remus hands feeling a warmth as they stay solid in his hold. “You were never a piece...but I was wrong. Because they can feel, you feel...and I feel you” He moves a hand to Remus cheek. Logan had never seen this energetic bumble of ‘not safe for work’ jokes and buzzing laughter so...tired. And it was his fault. “You feel pain and joy and sadness and-”

“Love” Remus adds, Logan holds back his desperation.

“I was truly an idiot, I was so focused on not looking like a failure I forgot my true goal. To discover and explore...not destroy” Logan sighs “I wanted to learn, but i let that go and became this”

“You dont wanna...destroy?” Remus cant quite wrap his head around it.

“No god. I wanted to understand! But i let the success and money get to me. And i lost sight of who I was. You arent a danger...you are a miracle” He smiles ever so slightly. “SOmething I love so much is not worth destroying” He states

“Love?” Remus feels himself relax.

“So..so much” Logan says

“Hah you're in love with a ghost” Remus teases, Logan sighs with a giggle and a playful eye roll.

“I still have the machine remus” Logan threatens with a grin. Remus steps back and gasps his collar.

“How dare thee!” He cries ever so mockingly. “I thought you cared”

“Woe is you” He laughs quickly pulling Remus into a kiss.

Yeah its weird, but so intriguing. He expected a cold chill but received warmth in Remus’s embrace.

They canceled the demonstration and gracefully stepped away. Years passed and Logan desperately tried to find a solution, he wanted Remus to stay, to be here in all his physical form. But on a quiet fall night, Remus was sprawled across the couch trying to dunk cheese balls into his mouth. Logan sat at his work bench concocting as he did. Logan had had his doubts over the years, Remus was a ghost. But Remus explained that the longer he was on earth he felt tethered a developed a physical form. He wasn't a human but he wasn't a ghost, almost a third party but he was real.

But he was fading.

And Logan worked tirelessly to find out what he could do. He had consulted with Virgil and Patton, two scientists who had done great strides for the world of science. He constantly worked alongside Janus but to no avail. Remus was fading, he would have to go soon. Remus didn't mind, all he tried to do was comfort his partner but Logan, for as smart as he was, was in deep denial.

But this fall night, as a cheesy treat fell into Remus’s mouth his image flickered. This caught Logans eye from his work.

“Remus?” He rushed over watching Remus sit up straight. The flickers were slow before they became full glitches and constantly. “No i need more time. Surely.” He could feel his tears coming.

“Promise me youll find someone? Whos maybe not a farting ghost” Remus shrugs, Logan shakes his head, this wasnt the time for jokes. “Logan you knew this was coming. Also lets be honest, it was weird im a ghost”

“You're not though! You're a tethered!” He cries

“Guess my tether snapped” Remus sighs. He wanted to spend these last few moments in sweet bliss but instead, in true Logann fashion, he was arguing. “Come cuddle me you obnoxious man” He pouts

He knows its a joke but the sadness in Remus’s eyes finally catches up to the scientist. He obliges sitting with Remus. They do cuddle, and Remus finally lets go. His tears are soft and he doesnt think much but he doesnt know whats going to happen next.

“You should get a dog” He sniffles, Logan laughs dryly stroking the messiest hair he had ever known. “Also Janus totally likes you” Remus wasnt oblivious to the way Janus looked at Logan. But he didn't mind, Logan was his...but he wanted his partner to be happy once he was gone.

“Perhaps, but let me just...let me mourn alright?” Logan asks

“Fine, but promise me you wont mourn forever, please?” He holds up his pinky, Logan rolls his eyes but promises either way. Remus leans up a tad to kiss Logans cheek. “Lets just sit here ok?” He requests, Logan grants it. “I love you Logie” He knows that only he is allowed to call him such a name. They sit in silence, feeling the heartbeats and warmth. Every intimate move felt so careful.

“I love you so much” He says after a moment of silence, he awaits a response but looks down to see Remus was no longer there. A small gasp as he takes to his chest. This is what it felt like, so much pain. They never conducted the experiments but as he clutched his heart and sobbed loudly he imagined this was close enough.

#intrulogical #logan sanders #remus sanders #sanders sides #write #writing #youtube #angst #no happy ending #thomas sanders #fanfic #fic #fanfiction

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akechicrimes · 4 years

Text

not to speculate too hard about the inside of a silent protagonist’s head, but the more i think about joker persona 5, the more convinced i am that he’s firmly entrenched his approach to relationships in hiding aspects of himself from others so that he can fulfill some sort of transactional relationship. and the more i think about that, the more i really do think that akira’s whole thing about emphasizing transactional relationships and almost intentionally surrounding himself with only selfishly-motivated people is a fear of intimacy.

i was talking with @aryashi about this post with akira’s really heartbreakingly cynical opinions on friendship, and the weird phenomenon where in persona 3 and 4, the protagonists are intentionally pushed to reconsider their views on friendship and making bonds with other people, and come out of their journeys with friends who’d ride and die for them. but with akira in persona 5, it��s odd because akira has a very well-documented transactional/cynical view on how relationships work, but he isn’t quite ever pushed to reconsider that point of view.

which is to say, persona 5 as a game is much less about relationships and friendships than persona 3 or 4. in persona 3, minato has only two personality traits, and those are that he’s a 2006 emo MCR fan and that he’s self-isolated. his entire character arc is about him un-isolating himself, learning to have relationships again, and learning that other people make life worth living. in persona 4, souji (or yu) is a city boy sent to a tight-knit community where everyone knows everyone, winds up learning first-hand just how judgmental small towns can be even in their proximity, and is forced to confront the perils and rewards of other people knowing you for who you truly are.

in comparison, persona 5 likes to say that it’s about justice and societal reform, and seems to actively encourage akira to mask himself (or at least parts of himself) in order to achieve societal reform. he is quite literally hiding half of his activities (thievery, mostly) from the other half of his life (his day life as a student). arguably, he’s also hiding his confidants/social linking side business from his own thievery team, too. logistically, this makes sense, since akira is avoiding getting put in jail for thievery by hiding his identity. the flip side is that akira works for a better society while never once being known for who he really is, which is a fairly common trope among masked heroes who do work for the whole of society while never once being thanked or recognized for their work, but it’s a stark contrast to the other games.

so in a lot of ways, not only is akira not pushed to reconsider his views on relationships, he’s actively encouraged to keep masking parts of himself from others, and to use his anonymity and ability to hide to his own advantage. in particular, akira is encouraged to find people who he can gain something from, people who stand to gain something from him, and to strike a deal; and this deal usually involves akira hiding parts of himself so that his new confidants will continue to work with him.

which is cool and also highkey relatable, sure, but it sure does seem to be one of the reasons why akira walks out of the game with a whole bunch of friends who seem to................. not really know him very well, for some reason? and all his social links are, like, a collection of business partners or sponsors?

that’s not to say that his relationships are always built on akira hiding parts of himself to fulfill a transactional deal. a lot of his relationships wind up being non-transactional even if they started off that way, and a lot of his relationships end with his confidants guessing that he’s a phantom thief. but i wonder if akira himself views them as non-transactional. or, that is to say, akira seems to move away from viewing relationships as purely transactional, but he’s never pushed to embrace a relationship that is purely, 100% altruistic.

he starts every relationship with a transactional deal from the beginning of the game to the end. he uses relationships as a “we mutually help each other out” sort of arrangement as far into the game as his last conversation with sae as his lawyer. and the fact that these relationships become deeper and more meaningful than a simple business arrangement doesn’t mean that they’re not still fundamentally business arrangements. it’s a bit like getting to know your local barista: you might have conversations and learn more about them and even become friends, but at the end of the day, fundamentally the arrangement is built on interactions where you pay them money for them to make you coffee. (and to keep going with the barista metaphor, such a business relationship depends entirely on presenting only certain aspects of oneself to another person so as to keep the relationship going.)

or, also consider what akira said in this tweet as linked in the first part of this post. it may be that he knows that, for example, kawakami comes out of her social link adoring her student, and would go above and beyond to help him if he asked. but that in itself is a transactional relationship of another kind, isnt it? akira has to continue being the sort of student that she likes in order to continue to have her support; in return, she lets him get away with all sorts of wild shit in her class. rather than a one-off transaction, the relationship moves almost towards a type of sponsorship, which akira trades behavior that she approves of for her continued, continuous help. so the relationship remains transactional, and in a lot of ways, akira is not only trading with supporting kawakami emotionally, but he’s hiding parts of himself in order to maintain the relationship he’s built.

aryashi said that he should have come out of the game with some ride-or-die friends like the other persona protags--friends who know him completely and entirely, and would go above and beyond for no transactional reason whatsoever. she said that he should have had at least “ryuji, or akechi,” which was so fascinating to me because those two characters are so entirely and completely polar opposites, but reflect akira’s issues of isolation from two really important angles.

ryuji’s probably the character who has the most altruistic relationship with akira. he latches onto akira and from the first time they meet, ryuji selflessly tries to sacrifice himself to save akira, who ryuji barely knows, met about five minutes previous, and actually doesn’t even know the name of. ryuji couldn’t have an ulterior motive to help akira if he tried. and ryuji’s remarkably consistent about his selflessness, too; there’s no benefit to ryuji when ryuji gets mad on akira’s behalf to defend him, and it continues all the way through P5R.

but in a weird way, it’s like akira doesn’t--understand this? although ryuji is the character who seems to care about akira himself the most and consistently defends akira, especially in regards to akira’s record, the instant ryuji’s social link starts, the social link progresses in the same manner as a lot of other social links, in which akira exchanges emotional labor and support for better teammates, better teamwork, better personas, better social links. suddenly it’s not about ryuji caring about akira, but akira helping ryuji through his track team problems. it’s like akira and ryuji are speaking entirely different languages, or are simply thinking so differently that akira just had no idea what to do with ryuji when ryuji goes out of his way to reach out to akira just for the sake of kindness. he seems taken aback by ryuji’s enthusiasm and sincerity in several cutscenes.

which is not to say that i dont think that akira doesnt value ryuji immensely, because i think he does, and i think that ryuji reaching out to him when akira had first moved to shujin and was entirely alone meant the world to akira. but i think that going through a friendship constantly feeling like ryuji’s altruism has an expiration date, impending dealbreaker, or is simply just incomprehensible because it doesnt have any transactional value to it is a type of isolation in itself. and if not a type of isolation, then definitely a type of emotional barrier that prevents akira from really embracing a relationship or person like ryuji--if not out of confusion, then maybe just out of fear.

confusion or fear, or maybe just a history of being rejected for who he is--either way, i do think that one of the things that’s so notable about a transactional relationship is that it makes intimacy much more controllable. persona 4 intimacy was a fucking gauntlet to be survived, because it was just a sheer, undiluted blast of your entire self being put on display. in persona 5, intimacy can be controlled if you know what a person wants out of you. if you know what they want, you can be that thing they want. if you know what they want from you, then you can leverage what they want. if the terms of the deal are clear-cut and determined from the start, someone like akira doesnt need to be afraid of being rejected, and never has to guess at what a person wants from him, and need never take an emotional risk himself. the more selfishly motivated a person is, the easier they are to please, and the easier they are to extract a working relationship out of, and the easier they are to even have a relationship with.

which brings us to akechi, because it does seem to be the case that akira gets along so well with akechi because it’s understood between the two of them that akechi is NOT here to be friends and he DOES have ulterior motives. even without the whole shido thing, akechi is pretty obviously there to nail akira for being a phantom thief; the kindest possible interpretation of akechi stalking akira is that akechi is there to pick up blackmail material on him.

not to speculate too hard about the insides of a silent protagonist’s head, but i do wonder if maybe that’s why he got along with akechi so well: he assumes that akechi wants something from him that benefits only akechi himself, and akira is totally right. that sort of selfish motivation is something that akira can understand, predict, and accommodate.

nobody is allowed to tell that one anon who keeps showing up in people’s inboxes trying to convince everyone that shuake is an unhealthy ship, but it’s not a great dynamic. it’s also not any different from any of the other social links akira has. it’s pretty par for akira’s course, actually.

it’s also what akira understands, and it’s what akira is comfortable with, and oddly it serves as a point of connection between the two of them, especially in their P5R s link. and the more that akechi pushes at various emotional issues throughout his social link under the cover of “i’m only here to investigate you,” the more emotional intimacy they can get away with while pretending they aren’t doing exactly what they’re doing.

which is like. bro. when goro akechi is better at emotional intimacy than you are. you done REALLY fucked up.

but at the same time it’s like........................ it’s very clear that akira walks away from the game with more or less the same point of view on friendships and relationships that he went into the game with, because akechi wasnt going to be the kind of person who pushes him on that point. again, akechi and akira having a relationship that started off transactional and grew to become something else doesn’t necessarily mean that either one of them have changed their general modus operandi on this point. the person that would have really pushed akira to change would have been ryuji--but for whatever reason, ryuji didn’t wind up being the catalyst for that sort of change that he should have.

i dont really have a conclusion because this is my blog and i can do whatever i want and nobody has yet paid me enough money to buy my silence, but if you really want a conclusion, have this: pegoryugoro IS a valid ship and they DO have an interesting and compelling dynamic and i SWEAR to god i will make it work one day.

#mine #maybe dont take this post too seriously #i didnt really think for most of this rant

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ilikelookingatthings · 4 years

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Thoughts on Akatsuki no yona: chapter 196 part 1

hmmm.....do I believe kyk-sook about the talk with the king Il and yu-hon?.....I don’t trust mndern day adult version of him in the slightest....but there isn;t much reason to believe he’d lie as a child/teen. Its a interesting situation where Yona is hearing about what happened from Yon-hi’s diary which Yon-hi over heard from the talks of kyk-sook telling soo-won and the other men. but we saw the talks up close like we were there which gives us a reason to think the report must be completely what happened because WE are seeing it as kyke-sook describes. but if we think about it logically we still don’t know for sure.

On one hand it makes it easier to picture and get a grasp of what happened and who said what because we see it as if we were witnessing it ourselves. On the other my extention of disbelieve is having trouble trusting it. it gives off the vibe of ‘how do you know about the things you weren’t there for’. Like kyke-sook was quite a bit away... how did he hear everything? how did he remember everything word for word? We also know lots of people were disappointed in yu-hon not being chosen so would kyk-sook lie to soo-won to get soo-won motivated?

But then again the proof was that soo-won looked at the corpse and was able to find the stab wound that was easy to miss and that it was in the back which lines up and proves those events. AND we know Il has motive.

It would be very easy to think Il thought Yu-hon killed Kaashi. Il has been paranoid his brother would find out her identity f for years. His brother was willing to kill all the priests, women and children included. Heck Il had saved Kaashi from literally burning alive in that fire that first time which had been on yu-hon’s orders. Kaashi was attacked after being invited to visit yu-hon’s wife and the last time kaashi and yon-hi got together was when yon-hi collapsed after the conversation with Kaashi. If Il found out about yon-hi’s illness and the connection to the king hirryu blood King Il would have good reason to suspect his brother might try picking a fight with yona or the priestess/wife if his brother projected his sense of helplessness about his wife’s situation onto them.

We and Yon-hi knows how much yu-hon cared about his brother and wanted to support him and appreciated other people who see his younger brother’s worth. no liking people already depressed before his brother has done anything yet for example. telling yon-hi and his son thathe wants to support his brother and the country. Wanting his brother to hang out with him instead of the priests to the point his tone was too harsh and made Il feel bad for enjoying the one thing people dont carepare and look down on IL for. Yu-hon was really bd at getting his feelings across properly to his younger brother. H e wants to support his brother but he never properly let Il know about that.

even when yu-hon has the best intentions to help he tends to forget to talk to the people involved and his help can hurt. like how yu-hon killed all the priests without asking and yon-hi was terrible sad and hurt because none of her family approved of that and her mom killed herself as well as hurting his brother by taking away the only people who didnt make fun of him(the priests), a lie from his brother hiding yon-hi’s bloodline. then seeing up close and personal and murder and killing of priests who hadn’t done anything warenting being set on fire and the people letting his brother get away with wjth.

There is a chance that yu-hon ordered kaashi or Yona to be attacked if he thought the influence was too strong and dangerious because she was a priest and he thought his brother would rely on the priestess words too much. Or it could have been a attack on Yona due to her being the reincarnation and yu-hon associating that with his dying wife. All of the people supportingyu-hon who heard the words seem to think Il was influenced or deluded thanks to the priestess and that fixationon the religion is the only reason Prince Il was chosen by the original king.

But I do wonder...the priestess kaashi was already dead and Il knows his brothers the popular one. what did he think his brother would do? Il was already going to be king? and we know Il did cry. Yu-hon was thinking of the long term survival of the kingdom and he aparently had a dream of taking over the whole continant according to his followers. Yu-hon definitly seems the more reasonable one daying that Il needs to focus on using the people and puting in work and to not just rely on the gods. Yu-hon was the one actually properly trained to be the leader of the country for years and has the broad enough sense to know you have to rely on people. but we also know Il is right that Yu-hon might care forthe people close to him he will do bad stuff he shouldnt do without a second thought seeing it as justified as a means to a end.

It makes sense why Il wouldn’t trust his brother. especially since we know grief can change people and Kaashi died very recently AND Il is now the king while knowing he isn’t supported by anyone other than Mundeok.

Its easy for us to belive that Il is mistaken and that yu-hon didn’t kill Kaashi. but we are also only viewing him through yon-hi’s lense. the mahoriy of what we see are his good intentions that don’t come out right and trust he fully commited to supporting his brother since he told his wife and kid that.

But Il is also his brother and has seen how far yu-hon will go in other aspects and that even hen you think your safe with the brother if he finds a reason to see you as a enemy yu-hon will change and act swiftly. Though I wonder why Il thought stabbing his brother was the only way. Like couldnt he have looked into who killed his wife and get evidence it was his older brother and judge him in a court?

Did Il think no one would convict him because of how popular he is and that he’d get away with it just as Yu-hon got away with killing all those priests because he was so popular and everyone would prefer him? did Il not want his brothers reputation ruined?

Yon-hi seems to truly believe its possible that Yu-hon killed Kaashi and thats pretty telling. though of course one murder doesnt mean its okay to murder someone else and king Il knew yu-hon had a kid so thats cold. I don’t get why Il wouldnt have done something about kyk-soo since it was clear he witnessed the murder and that it wasnt a accident.

Il seems focused on the dragons and praying....but I wonder if its also a result of no one believing in his abilitities? he has spent years of everyone critisizing him instead of teaching him including his brother, even that wasn’t his bro’s intentions. The one thing he was good at was praying. We know Il showed kindness and consideration to even commoners but we also know he didn’t leave the capital much so probably didn’t have alot of experience seeing how sometimes force is nessacary since the one big show for force what what happened to the priests that he saw. and he robably didn’t have favorable thoughts about the cutting up the head thing. I wonder if Il thought he couldn’t rule with his bro by his side because he couldn’t trust him and might see him as a threat to Yona. Though Il being hyper fixated on religion does seem to be his MO and him bringing up that soo-won can’t replace king hirryu and stuff like that later.

Its definitely noticeable that the ‘cowardly king’ nickname that even Il calls himself...I wonder if Il thinks its fiting because he stabbed his brother in the back and pushed him off the cliff instead of listening to him. Though it makes sense that if Il killed his brother why he wouldn’t want soo-won marrying Yona and that he faced his death head on. I wonder if Il though his brother would stop yona from becoming ruler or something?

I’m kind of enraged that the men told literal child soo-won about his dad literally being murdered by his uncle. They let him dig up his fathers dead body to check the wounds O.O

He is a CHILD. and while its smart because as a kid he would be less likly to get in trouble if found out and Soo-won chose to do this. Soo-won wouldn;t have looked into this if he wasn’ told about the murder. And aparently telling a literal child about it was better then them telling the mom? the PARENT that her husband had been killed by his brother. They let soo-won dig up his fathers corpse and never though to ask her opinion? Like soo-won is practical and he seems unaffected discussing everything but the fuck?

#akatsuki no yona #Il #kye sook #yon-hi #yu-hon #soo-won #yona #kaashi

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bees128 · 4 years

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What Is Emperor Belos’s Plan for the Human World

So here’s my theory and I actually have some Evidence, particularly it’s based on three aspects of the show so far

1 A Major theme that applies heavily to all the antagonistic forces in the show is the weird and interesting being assimilated into something "normal" e.g. destroying the "chaos" of wild witches and brainwashing the children to act like "Proper Witches".

2 As for Belos himself his character as far as I can tell he really does seem devoted to the titan? He follows the Titan’s will as he sees it. Also of lesser note is that with this most recent fight we have heavy connections between Belos and the manipulation of flesh.

3 The titan is still alive to a certain extent. It’s heart is still beating.

So how do you reconcile those 3 things together? Well something of note is that they’ve gone very hard into showing that the Human World is Weird to the people of the Boiling Isles. Gus has a fan club centered around them, Eda runs her business based on selling our junk as curios and oddities. Sure they exiled giraffes to our world in the past but with the exception of Eda bringing back Human Stuff it seems like No One has access to the human world (or at least no one we’ve met). So we have the human world is wierd and if we fit it into that theme up there Belos must want to assimilate the human world somehow. The question is how? Most people are going with the idea that “Belos wants to bring/force magic into the human world” and not gonna lie I could see that. Alot of the show is based around the destruction and assimilation of religions by Christianity/Catholicism and forcing magic as his “religion” upon a foreign land that none on the boiling isles except Eda, (and now lillith and King) have seen in living memory? A perfect allegory for missionaries spreading catholicism in North America. However, PERSONALLY I have 2 contentions with this. 1 is that Luz while not happy with Belos’s way would Absolutely be Down for magic to spread to the real world. B. Quite Frankly it doesn’t seem climactic enough for me as a BBEG Plan. Think to other cartoons like Gravity falls and SPoP with Wierdmageddon and the Heart of Etheria. I contest that Belos’s plan is going to be more concerted around some Major Event he’s going to try to bring about. But what could this shows Central event be? Well, Let’s talk about the Titan.

Belos serves the “Titan’s will” he doesn’t prostrate himself before it or anything but it’s clear that at least as far as we can see that he considers it a force greater than himself and places great value in it. He built his fortress around the one part of the Titan that we can see is visibly alive, he’s built machinery into the titans flesh (to help preserve/keep it alive?) which stretches throughout the entire fortress. He’s consolidating power through the covens system in the name of the titan. Quite frankly it’s almost like he’s trying to assimilate his castle and through the emporers coven, the strongest sources of magic he can get on the isles, into the Titan.

I Wonder what Else he might Try to Assimilate Into the Titan...

Ok so I won’t beat around the bush anymore. I think Belos is going to try to use the human world in some fashion, to essentially revive the Titan and I feel like theres so many reasons why this works. Narratively theres a couple good reasons, it shows how destructive and harmful the assimilation of religion and culture is in the real world, it’s a plan worthy of of a BBEG centered around a concrete goal that the heroes can have clear objectives on how to stop. It puts Luz in direct personally driven conflict with Belos’s ambitions because instead of bringing magic to the human world, he’s harming the human world in order to achieve a goal that literally no character in the show other than a Titan Obsessed Madman would want, likely in one way or another it will show Camilla in direct danger too which further compounds Luz having to oppose Belos. It fits Belos’s character down to his abilities I mean the man moves flesh so its not too far of a stretch to imagine his plan involves flesh too or that what with his obsession with the titan that his plan might involve the titan. As well as the human world the Boiling Isles is entirely inside of the carcass of the titan so what do you thinks going to happen to Everyone and Everything on the boiling isles if the flesh of the titan starts to grow back? That’s Right guys gals and NB pals ASSIMILATION. (im thinking of that billy and mandy meme where billy from I think the Movie? where a robot billy just keeps yelling ASSIMILATE. ASSIMILATE. ASSIMILATE.) So now Luz now has precedent to not only save the human world, but also demon world as she knows and loves it. Also it answers a question that the audience has had since we first saw the carcass which is what did it look like when it was alive? It gives Belos a motivation on why he suppresses wild witches because they understandably, would be the first to step up to stop his plan, and conversely the more he has people under the coven system the less likely they are to rebel when he tries to consume them all in his grand plan. *cough Cough allegory for capitalism too cough

Belos will have Unity, at any cost.

So we have the What of the Plan and the Why, but all that’s left is the How? Well at this point i’ve kinda run out of compelling evidence so instead of halfbaked theories this here is now in Wild Speculation Territory. The only thing thats certain is that if this theory is true something he’s missing for the revival of the Titan is in the Human World. So i’ve got a couple ideas and im just gonna lightning round them

1 Theres been multiple insinuations that the Boiling Isles isn’t the Only Titan, presumably if there is another in some shape or form it’s somehow in the Human World. Maybe there’s some Key Item from this Titan that Belos Needs to revive the Boiling Isles Titan (im gonna call it the BI titan) what could that key item be?

1a A item to supercharge his Magic for Magic Reasons(tm) so he can revive the titan

1b A Item to make the Titan able to receive Whatever Belos would use from the human world to fill in its flesh (ala anti rejection drugs when it comes to a organ transplant)

1c He has what he needs to Revive the Titan but to take what he needs from the Human World he needs a big portal like a BIG one. And the thing he needs to make a portal of that size (or potentially reopen since because of giraffes we know there was Some Way to the human world that probably wasnt the door unless they like, used shrinking magic on the entire Boiling Isles Giraffe Population, brought them through the door, then unshrunk them all) is inconveniently in the Human World

2 Same as all of 1 except instead of another titan its just something thats there

3 same as 2 except that its a Someone (Camilla?) for Some Reason

4 He thinks what he needs is in the human world but it’s actually in the demon world and Belos is just Blind

5 He has what he needs and instead of needing a really big portal the door is enough, he just needs to fix it and start assimilating

Beyond those I have some more wild Speculation on how they’re gonna deal with the Titan

1. They either destroy Belos or force him into a change of heart somehow

2. They FMA:B this and do a Massive Glyph thats at least as big as his fortress if not Larger to stop belos (likely not murder, maybe through a “trap you in a false world where everything went right for you” or something like that)

3. Luz is the one that gives Magic to the Human world either from the BI Titan or the hypotetical Human World one and the glorious revolution of the people overthrows the tyrants

4. What either Belos or Luz or both be going after is King’s Crown. If Belos doesnt need the crown Luz would and gives it to King and then King and the Titan do a Kaiju Big Battle.

5. They pull a SPoP and its literally the magic of Gay is Too Strong and Saves the Day and they date and kiss and everything is good

The End

#Luz #Eda #Belos #Lillith #Emperor Belos #King #Owl House #The Owl House #TOH #Boiling Isles #Amity #Luz Noceda #Camilla Noceda #Camilla #lumity #Amity Blight #Eda Clawthorne #Lillith Clawthorne #theory

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