#i love the juniors have i said i love the juniors? i really do theyre so fun | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shakirawastaken · 1 year

Text

dsmp if...they were teachers part 2

ANON I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED UR REQUEST IM SO SORRY IM GONNA CRY BUT here it is :D with techno too :) please people send in some requests for meee check out part 1 here!

techno: english (with 1 mythology class for seniors): - hates his english classes wishes he could just teach mythology - would make all the students do a little project on a greek mythology story - rivalry with mr soot - “ill give u each 10 dollars if u go to mr soots class tmrw talkin about how im a better teacher” - supports each and every kid no matter WHAT even if its not english related - holds detention in his room cause no one wants to fuck with him - like dream he doesnt anyone to get fucked over his english class so he hosts after school office hours like its college - has read all the classic novels and makes his classes read them. he wont move to something else unless some kid IS REALLY passionate about it - “ranboo we will not be reading the diary of a wimpy kid series even if you resonate with greg heffley on an emotional level” - BUT for his english classes he makes them do a general book report project so he can see and appreciate his student’s taste in books - albeit not the biggest fan of romance novels but knows it ends with us for some reason - brings all the projects home and keeps them in a big storage bin. he loves showing them off to future classes and even you - light. acadmeia. dresses formal, long sleeves, hair tamed, glasses on the bridge of his nose - “tommy please stop swearing. tubbo calm down?” - hold detention with him cause no one fucks with mr blade

phil: principal - best principal ever - has a great relationship with all the staff tbh - wilbur and techno and tommy arent his sons wdym - no ones rlly scared of getting sent to the principals cause like yk theyre like “oh phil??? hes nice” - everyone calls him phil - ok i lied everyone BUT tommy isnt scared of going to phils - “I DONT WANT TO GO TO PHILS” “tommy calm down-” - hates the school board, lets the teachers teach what they believe is best for the students - can deal with the consequences - once wilbur got him to play a role in on of the school’s productions - big year for the dsmp high thespians tbh - is married to the guidance counselor kristin - who by the way is a GOOD COUNSELOR - actually does guidance - phils whole office is green - always wears his bucket hat tbh - besties with the other school’s principals

foolish: architecture/woodworking - i think this one was another “duhhh” one - builder man teaches builder children - starts the year with teaching them the basics of everything and then sort of lets them go wild - is so scared some kid is gonna get hurt - has goggles in every corner of his room, gloves, whatever safety stuff - loves it when kids work together to make some big project - IN YOUR GUYS’ HOME YOU HAVE A SHELF full of little sharks all the kids made for him its so cute - he makes stuff for you in class and uses it as an excuse to teach - wears muscle t-s or normal t-shirts never dresses formal - “it would get in the way of the wood?? duh” - id want to be in his class - is besties with mr jacobs and mr punz the random coach who shows up just to coach basketball in the winter - another teacher everyone simps over - once refused to teach tommy cause he didnt want to “catch a case”

i kinda want to write for the bench trio so here’s STUDENT EDITION

tommy: junior in high school, ta to mr wastakens math class - tommy signed up to TA for wilbur but then wilbur said “absolutely not” so he got put into dream’s introduction to stats class - but he also has dream for the period after that for his ap stats class - so hes stuck there for like 2 and a half hours - dream groaned when he saw who his TA was - makes tommy grade papers and stuff but never tests - he doesnt trust him with that - tommy is a good kid and usually doesnt disrupt class but when he does its hilarious - expect mr blade doesnt give a second shit about tommy in his class - tommy is rlly good at drama and math (even though hed never admit hes good at math) - his locker is a mess - besties with tubs and ranboo ofc - phil is his father dont tell anyone - he is so adamant on walking home bc he doesnt want people to know that his family works there - always has his red jacket on - never gets school lunches says they are cursed

tubbo: junior in high school, ta for mr quackity’s spanish class - tubbo likes quackity so he signed up to ta for his class - he isnt good at spanish tho- - quackity knows that but likes tubbo so he lets him be - sapnap ADORES tubbo for some reason - “TOBY!!! WHATS UP!” “hi mr sapnap” - sapnap thinks tubbo is such a good kid - but - mr notfound knows tubbo is a menace - “good morning toby” “good morning mr notfound *innocent*” “sit down and get started please” - SO FUNNY LMAO - tubbo is a menace - pulls a bunch of pranks on the teachers but then the blame always ends on tommy somehow “wHAT- TUBBO DID IT” “no he didnt” - besties with tommy and ranboo ofc - tubbo is rlly good at science but isnt so hot at english - but mr blade is rlly nice and takes him time to help tubbo - tubbo appreciates it so he gets mr blade a gift at christmas - mr blade teared up - runs thru the hall dragging tom and ranboo behind him no regrets - “STOP RUNNING THROUGH THE HALLS” “no” ranboo: junior in high school, ta for mr blades mythology class - lOVES ta-ing for mr blades class - mr blade kinda lets him chill in the back, stapling papers - no interaction whatsoever - he also now cant wait to take that class next year - mr blade refers to him as my protege a lot - i hope i used that word right - besties with tommy and tubbo - all the teachers are nice to ranboo and kinda sorry that hes friends with tommy and tubbo LMFAO - “hi ranboo u doing ok” “yes thank u mr jacobs” “RANBOO! LETS GO! PUDDING DAY IN THE CAFETERIA” “thats my cue mr jacobs” - ranboo usually doesnt get into trouble when he does oh boy its good - not pranks on teachers but school wide pranks - is shy but when someone picks on tommy and tubbo he GOES OFF - attacks them through words - when he gets comfortable in a class he lets out these small comments that get the whole room laughing - so not the class clown but people know hes funny and people respects him

#technoblade x reader #philza minecraft x reader #tommyinnit x reader #tubbo x reader #ranboo x reader #dreamwastaken x reader #sapnap x reader #georgenotfound x reader #quackity x reader #karl jacobs x reader #wilbur soot x reader

608 notes · View notes

wangxianficfinder · 3 months

Text

Fic Finder

Jan 25th

~*~

1. I'm begging to know if you have this fic. Years back, I read a fic where Wei Ying is exiled from the Lan clan and in the process becomes mute kind of (?) by choice. Years-ish later the Lan clan would beg him back to teach the juniors dark arts, and after something he would comply. It's a lot of Lan Zhan trying to apologize and Wei Ying not taking it afterwards, but I do believe it has a good ending. Do you perhaps know what this fic is? I've been trying to dig out the name for a month or so now. @sunshines-child

FOUND? Wei Ying's Destroyed Heart by Belladonna01234 (Wattpad)

~*~

2. hi!!! im looking for a genderbend fic( i think ?) where wwx is set to marry jin guangyao (theyre each others beards) and lwj is the florist, or maybe the other way around. i didnt read it, i only remember those specific things bc of the tags and the summary, but most definitely one of them is the florist at the other's wedding, and they meet and such is life. thank you so much!!!

FOUND! Widow's Weeds by travelingneuritis (E, 18k, wangxian, Modern Cultivation, Gardens & Gardening, Wedding Planning, wedding thwartin, grich people are terrible, Light-Hearted, Smut, Gender Changes, Getting Together, offscreen deaths played for laughs, this is meant to be silly don't worry about it, Scheming, Plotting, wwx and jgy are accidentally-on-purpose bearding each other but i keep it PG, wwx running laps around the entire jin sect)

~*~

3. Hello! I am looking for a fic which I am 90% sure is a WWX/LWJ fic, but there is a 10% chance it might be Keith/Shiro from Voltron (oops, ehe, if so please disregard this ask!). It is a modern au where WWX looks like a rough guy, maybe from a motorcycle gang, and LWJ is a lovely put together businessman. The office where LWJ works begins to notice their boss (LWJ) meeting with tattooed WWX and they think WWX might be up to no good! But WWX is actually a cop or fireman, and he just looks a bit like a road rat. They eat pastries together on their lunch break. Does this ring a bell? I have been looking for ages! Thank you!!!

3 is definitely a Voltron fic if the other blades of Marmora are Keith's fellow cops.

~*~

4. Hi! For fic finder, there is a fic that i only read the summary and a snippet of the story. I didnt read that fic at first because it is not something i usually read, but now its haunting me. Its ice skating au. I think there are "madam yu bashing" In the tag (im not sure). And the snippet i read is NHS beat up WC in secluded place in revenge for WWX. There are no CCTV and NHS said to WC that no one will believe him that NHS beat him up. I know its short, but i really dont know the story. Thank you!

FOUND! enough, for me by doodlebutt (T, 1k, Modern AU) which takes place during chapter 7 of All the shine of a thousand spotlights (M, 60k, WangXian, Modern AU, figure skating, Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Major Character Injury, Recovery, Getting Together, background relationships - chengqing; xuanli; xiyao, Background Pregnancy, the mortifying ordeal of Talking About Your Feelings, sexually tense pair skating, There Was Only One Bed)

~*~

5. WWX and LZ are flabbergasted to see the other alive: WWX was burning paper money at LZ’s funeral as LZ died protecting him and LZ was attending WWX’s funeral as LZ failed to protect WWX during a nighthunt. The universe did some weird shit that merged the two timelines so now they’re both alive and with each other. I can’t find it anywhere @selena10180

~*~

6. There was this fic, i don't remember, wwx was single and pregnant and his family (i think jiangs or wen? ) was with him? If u could find this fic and more like it?

FOUND? All I Want by Selenay (E, 47k, WangXian, Modern AU, No Powers, Mpreg, Post Holiday Romance, Consequences, Reunions, Idiots in Love, Teacher WWX, Rating earned in later chapters, Handwavey Biology)

FOUND? Nothing but your heart by airinshaw (E, 21k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Implied Mpreg, First Time, Getting Together, Angst and Drama, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anal Sex, Whump, Breeding Kink) could also be this

~*~

7. hi!! im looking for an unfinished (as of when i read it at least!!) accidental baby acquisition fic where wwx drops a baby (lsz i believe!) off at lwjs door in the middle of the night and disappears — i know thats vague but i dont remember a lot of details? it was a lot of introspection and confusion on lwjs part, kind of OH SHIT i have to look after this baby now n wwx is vanished n idk whats going on. n to my memory in the next chapter or so wwx comes back and is still rlly weird n mysterious n frustrating abt the babys origins n theres wx vibes but lwj is real confused. sorry i dont have more detail but i really hope i can find it!!!

~*~

8. Hi! :D I really hope you can help me find this fic! I have been looking for weeks! it's driving me nuts!

I remember that WWX doesn't die and LXC help him live hidden in CR using the identity of a Lan that has died, WWX is taking care of LWJ/is LWJ's servant, there is a scene where they are in Lanling (I think) and WWX has befriended some of the servants there, him and one? of them are talking about WWX's feelings for LWJ/if LWJ love WWX/or something like that, and then LWJ is there, I'm pretty sure they go somewhere else and confess to e/o

FOUND! Unbreakable Heaven, Luminous Earth by carolyncaves (M, 96k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, Secret Identity, almost to the point of uncomfortable identity theft, Sharing a Bed, Literal Sleeping Together, Mutual Pining, Getting Together, Suicidal Thoughts, that's for WWX after Nightless City and is not pervasive throughout the fic, Blood and Injury, Hurt/Comfort, Caretaking, Sexual Content, Domestic Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, Power Imbalance, mainly between WWX and JGY in an entirely nonsexual manner, this isn't really a kid fic but the kids are there, as are some yunmeng sibling feelings, JYL lives, Not Everyone Dies AU, some COVID parallels, this is not a quarantine fic, but thematically WWX deals w things like face-covering for safety and loss of control, also assume all canon warnings, this AU is gentler than canon but isn't a complete fix-it)

~*~

9. Hi hi! Thanks for your wonderful recommendations always! I’m looking for a wangxian fic where WWX has a breakdown in the lotus pier courtyard and the vibes are like “I’ve tried so hard for so long and for what; I can’t anymore; I’m so alone” and the Jiangs are like “… oh shit” and then treat him better after that and help him bear the burdens. (I can’t remember if WWX is a dragon also?) @vi-sky

#9 while the suggestion is great I don’t think this is the fix I was looking for. I don’t think the Jiangs find out about anything until WWX has the breakdown in the courtyard, and I think he kept it to himself for awhile as opposed to his breakdown being chapter 1 in the recommended.

NOT FOUND! 🧡 (Un)Hidden truth by Sarah_R (M, 198k, WIP, WangXian, Suicide attempt, Time Travel, Hurt/comfort, Angst, Self-Harm)

~*~

10. Hello! I can't remember much details but I think lan zhan lands on an unfamiliar planet, there he meet wei ying. Wei ying appearance is different, his body i think is color pink? or blue or like galaxy (눈▽눈) I 'm not really sure but he is not human , also wei ying is shy at first and then warm up eventually. Wahh thank you in advance!

~*~

11. Hello! For fic finder: I am trying to find a fic I read recently (within the last 6 months or so) where Wei Wuxian cultivates a resentful energy core but it was held outside his body in the Yin Tiger Tally. Lan Wangji doesn’t know that, so he convinces Wei Wuxian to give up the Tiger Tally as a gesture of peace. Everyone gathers around to watch and are horrified when as Wei Wuxian crushes the Tiger Tally in his hand and the Tally crumbles to dust, Wei Wuxian keels over in terrible agony at losing his core a second time. I think Wangji rushes over to help but Wen Qing pushes him away. It wasn't Decay by antebunny (although that is a good fic!!). Any thoughts? Thank you!

~*~

12. hi I just remembered a fic in modern verse where Wei Ying boarded a flight that disappeared mid air and landed after 10+ yrs and Lan Zhan comes to pick up from the airport once he gets the news. I can't seem to find it can you please help and thanks for your efforts its bought me across many amazing fanfics

FOUND! 看客散去唯你我不忘 | the world forgets but i still remember you by prettyxianxian (T, 11k, wangxian, Modern, Flashbacks, POV Multiple, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Lives AU, Insecurities à la WWX, manifest au, JC & WWX Reconciliation, Good Parent YZY, Good Parent JFM)

~*~

13. Hello!! I'm looking for a fic that I was sure i had reblogged but now I can't find it anywhere 😔 It was on tumblr not ao3. LWJ is sex-cursed and he has to be touched by the person he loves. It was during the burial mound days and WWX is isolated from the cultivation world, and also LWJ refuses to ask him for help for that, he'drather die. LXC finds out and takes an unconscious LWJ to the burial mounds and gives him a day to tell WWX on his own or LXC will do it, and LWJ only agrees because he intends to run away before WWX finds out why he's there @kokobabee

FOUND! Tumblr Fic by @jingyismom

~*~

14. Hello! I badly need help. I've been looking for this fic. I think it was like 5+1 or something where other people learn that Sizhui is Hanguangjun's son and that one time that Wei Wuxian did. I remember some of the 5+1 was a scene with a vendor, another scene with Ouyang-zongzhu in a nighthunt and I'm not sure if Jiang Wanyin was also one of them. But yeah, I've tried all keywords I could think of but I just can't find it. I hope you can help me. Thank you so much for all your efforts.

~*~

15. Hello I am looking for a fic where the world agrees to not kill Wei Ying if he marries and dual cultivates with someone and it's LWJ @calamityisalve

~*~

16. I am looking for a fic where wangxian invite the cultivation world to their wedding but wei wuxian and Lan shizui get badly hurt during the hunt before the wedding. The wedding is postponed and I think it had a scene where they fell down a waterfall? Please find it for me🙏

~*~

17. Hiiii!!!! I’m looking for a Twitter thread fic about a Warprize Lwj ABO Au where he became a consort to wen zhuliu? I think it was him, anyway, he gave birth a-yuan but a-yuan was actually Wwx son. I remember there was quote retweeted art of the thread fic where Wwx was standing over a-yuan’s cradle.

If you actually manage to find it a million thanks!!! @silent-taco

FOUND? Twitter thread by @cerbykerby, art by @hellinglaozu

FOUND? 🔒 Poison series by Cy_an_Blue, NiceElsa (E, 30k, wangxian, Gods & Goddesses, God WWX, God LY, A/B/O, Alpha WWX, Omega LY, Pre-Relationship wangxian, Implied/Referenced Forced Marriage, Implied/Referenced Bottom LWJ, Omega LWJ, Alpha LXC, Married WangXian with kids, Dark, War Prize LWJ, Forced Pregnancy, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Not by WangXian, Adultery, Cheating, Threats of Violence, Threats of Child Abuse/Murder, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon-Typical Gore, Smut, Mpreg, Pregnancy, Pregnant Sex, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Endgame Wangxian, Post Mpreg, post pregnancy, Protective LQR, Gūsū Lán Elders Bashing)

~*~

18. Hello! I hope you can help me find this one, because I’m not having much luck; Wei Ying agrees to do what the sects want in exchange for the Lan sect taking in the Wen. He is basically imprisoned in the Unclean Realm and can’t practice demonic cultivation, and over time Nie Huaisand and Nie Mingjue start to warm up to him.

I think the one scene I remember most is a scene where Lan Huan asks Wei Ying if he can play for Nie Mingjue but Wei Ying says he can’t and admits that he has no golden core after making Lan Huan promise to keep it a secret. Hope this helps?

FOUND? Always walked a very thin line by tucuxi (T, 22k, WangXian, NHS & WWX, JYL & WWX, Depression, Anxiety Attacks, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Self-Worth Issues, Slow Burn, Oblivious WWX, Golden Core Reveal, WWX Has No Golden Core, Chronic Pain, Chronic Illness)

~*~

19. 你好! I've been looking for a fic with mute wei ying? (mute by choice, I believe). I cannot remember much, but I do remember that Wei Ying is exiled by the Gusu Lan clan, led by Lan Zhan himself. He's later called back to teach the juniors lessons on Demonic cultivation, where they found out after many years of choosing not to talk, he's kind of lost his voice. I don't know if you could find this fic, but it's been plaguing my brain for awhile now.

~*~

20. Hi! Searching for a fic where omegaxian is the assistant physician of Wen Qing and then Emperor (not sure if emperor or just a prince) Alphaji want him immediately as his consort. Wen qing and other people protested and told alphaji that omegaxian is not available because he is only a physician.

I remember it being a threadfic in X (twitter)

Thank you so much

~*~

#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic finder #wangxian fic search #the untamed #wangxianficfinder #long post

72 notes · View notes

deepdeanvsweston · 6 days

Note

6, 24 and 21 for the mmu ask game please!

6. Most interesting murder

Either Murder Most Unladylike or A Spoonful Of Murder! Admittedly I can't remember much of it, but I do remember MMU being interesting to me because of the dynamics within it? A teacher killing a student was such a way to start a series, and the whole fact she was her DAUGHTER? like wow. So MMU was interesting. A Spoonful Of Murder is also interesting because if I remember quickly no-one was supposed to have been murdered? So I really liked reading ASOM sort of knowing that everyone had no fucking clue about anything, INCLUDING the murder. Was also interesting because it was Hazel's FAMILY

24. Best book cover

I LOVE the ministry covers because they have actual pictures of the characters! I can't visualise faces so that was very fun and very helpful!!! I also LOVE the American covers I think theyre so cool and I love the fonts and the colours and everything about them

Also something to be said for Death Sets Sail shininess!!!

21. Set of characters who you'd love to see interact

NEED to see Eric and Alex interact!!! For that matter just Eric with the Junior Pinkertons (sidenote that the bit where he was talking to George in BITB was so sweet!) I think Alex would LOVE Eric and vice versa. I like to hc that Alex likes to draw comics, so I think it'd be wonderful to have them interact through drawing or something like that <3

#murder most unladylike #mmu #eric schlossbauer #george mukherjee #alexander arcady #a spoonful of murder #asom #the ministry of unladylike activity #tmua

8 notes · View notes

officialgleamstar · 9 months

Note

MNMOMS??? 👀👀👀👀👀

hmmmm I’d like to know more about the relationship between the moms and their kids maybe? if you havent answered that already?

oh or anything about the relationship between any of the moms

really just anything about mnmoms, im obsessed GSHSHSHGSHEH

HIII LEX!! oogh. relationships between the moms and their kids... i think ive mostly only talked about morgan and nick/nicholas, on tumblr at least, so i can definitely get more into that :D

morgan and nick... well-trod ground. morgan is severely paranoid and over-protective of nick, while nick is severely clingy but also has to pick a fight with everything she say, etc etc. i havent spoken as much about morgan's relationship with nicholas i dont think beyond establishing that she loves him and that hes a total mama's boy gbhjfdhjbj so i can talk about that!! though shes more well-managed by the time he is present, morgan is still very protective of nicholas, helped by the fact that he is the most high-strung kid on the planet. hes very jumpy whenever jodie isnt around, seeing him as his main source of safety, and hes also like... pretty aware of morgan's conflicted feelings on him? nicholas is exactly what morgan always wanted nick to be, well-behaved and careful, and it just makes her so much more aware of everything she lost. nicholas knows he is loved, and morgan does love nicholas, but hes also very aware of... well, his mom is different to him now, too. he can understand that he is just as foreign to her, hes a smart kid. they love each other very much, and honestly, morgan's relationship with nicholas is a lot healthier than it was with nick, but theyre both overly aware of the elephant in the room.

carol and grant probably have the most consistently positive mother/son relationship throughout the entirety of mnmoms, besides mercedes and lark at least! however, this... isnt for good reasons LMAO. pre-forgotten realms, carol generally wasnt home much, preferring to work herself to death at her office job. so grant literally prefers her to darryl just because she was never the one around to get mad at, she was never trying to talk to him, he didnt have to worry about helping her with chores because she didnt do housework, etc. they love each other very much, but once they get to the forgotten realms, carol becomes very aware that she cannot remember the last time she had a proper conversation with her son. just, no comprehension of whats going on in his life at the moment. its BAD, yall, but the two never really question their love for each other, which cant be said for all the kids. ive talked about this before, but they do have a plot of bonding over their sexuality journeys, carol works really harden to soften her sharp edges for her son and to be more present in his life, and they come out of the forgotten realms in a much better place than they went in! (though, take this with a grain of salt, because its definitely the same way that darryl and grant came out better in canon. this does not mean that they werent both traumatized LOL)

samantha and terry junior... start off the worst, for sure :') i have talked about their relationship before but it was part of a longer ramble about sammy, so i will reiterate it here! samantha has a bad habit of going therapy mode on terry junior and he is very aware of it. she is of the opinion that she should not put her emotions on her son at all, because she is his mother and thats not his responsibility (which actually stems a lot from samantha's relationship with her own mom but i think im gonna get into that more for isadora's ask--). however, terry takes her facade of calm as her being utterly in denial about terry senior dying at all, and he cant understand why she wont even show that shes upset. this already puts their relationship in a tenuous space over a few years, and when samantha starts dating and then marries ron, terry's trust in her is. utterly obliterated. at the end of their time in the forgotten realms, like with ron, they arguably have the best relationship though! samantha learns how to show her emotions without having terry junior feel obligated to help her and does her best to be more vulnerable with him in general, and terry junior learns how to accept that his mom is allowed to have a life beyond his biological dad. they make me so fjhbghjbghj <3333

and okay. right. finally. haunted expression. mercedes and the twins.

firstly, mercedes and lark. consistently a good relationship! they have the typical oak-garcia issue of lark running all over her, not really treating her as an authority figure, but its obvious that he absolutely adores her and that she adores him in turn. this is helped by the fact that mercedes is definitely the "fun" parent - glenn parallels, lol - so she has even less control over the twins than henry did, mostly because she never thinks to exert any. still, even though lark and sparrow are absolute agents of chaos, they love their mom and lark never stops loving their mom. by the end of their journey, he's a little more distant from mercedes out of guilt, mostly. lark is still the one to stab henry in this au without any of the deep rooted rogue card anger to validate it for himself, and he has a very hard time looking either of his parents in the eye afterwards. however, he also considers them both his main source of comfort, and tends to trail them quietly around the house when hes upset.

mercedes and sparrow. haunted expression intensifies. "Is there anything as undoing as a daughter?" sorry for quoting arcane but LITERALLY MERCEDES QUOTE OF ALL TIME. it starts... the same as mercedes and lark: no sense of authority, but very positive emotions! sparrow is not out as transfem at the beginning of their journey, its still something she is working out throughout their time in the forgotten realms (she very much has a moment of like... "i'm in a new place where nobody knows me, so i'm going to pretend to be a girl and see how many people are fooled! that's a very normal thing for boys to do!" and lark plays along lol), and a lot of their time pre-rogue card is dedicated to that! mercedes and sparrow bond a lot as sparrow warms up to the idea of coming out as trans, and mercedes. well. mercedes already knew before going into the realms and has been reading a million different pamphlets and consulting advice columns and talking to morgan on how to perfectly handle this situation LOL. so their relationship is kind of perfect, actually, and they are doing really really well until the deck of many things comes into play :')

post deck of many things, sparrow is... very openly Not A Fan Of Mercedes. she is still the upbeat positive lovewolf twin in this (though i think she more wants to generally be a witch than a lovewolf, since her mama's a bard and not a druid!), so it is even more obvious when sparrow suddenly is not giving mercedes the time of day. sparrow is utterly convinced that she is destined for greater things in a very negative way, and blames her discovery of this on mercedes getting them stuck in the forgotten realms. she also, similar to lark in canon, blames the moms as a whole for the fact that walter was hurt and sees them widely as useless. mercedes, for her part, does everything she can to redeem herself to sparrow, and is endlessly frustrated by the fact that nothing she does works. post-forgotten realms, they argue pretty relentlessly, sparrow locks herself in her room and screams herself hoarse, mercedes storms out into the back garden and cries until she gets a migraine, and henry takes lark out for ice cream-- despite this, sparrow does still seek out a lot of comfort from mercedes, and she has a habit of casually finding herself, at night, in wolf form and curled up at the foot of her parents' bed. strange and so weird how she ends up specifically sprawled out across her mom's feet at least once a week, if not fully laying between her parents. crazy. what a coincidence. shes a fully independent child with no need for comfort for sure though

#every time i talk about mercedes and sparrow i feel like my mommy issues are showing LMAO #SUCH A FUN QUESTION THANK U LEX #mnmoms au #ask #lex the lesbiann #dndads

12 notes · View notes

quodekash · 1 year

Text

THE EPISODE IS OUT AND IVE NOW WATCHED IT (and it took me two hours to get through as per usual) SO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

ITS TIME FOR MY COMMENTARY ON THE ENTIRE EPISODEEE (im sorry)

THEY WON HELL YES FINALLY

BUT IT WAS A DREAM

why? they like crushing our souls.

the scene of gun waking up and getting ready (having a shower, brushing his teeth) reflects the very first episode, where he had so much energy and he was preparing his speech for the juniors. And now he’s lost the biggest competition of his life so far, he’s sad, and honestly he’s lost - but not in the meaning that he didn’t win, he’s lost in the way that he doesn’t know where he is or where to go or what to do. and gmm is making me cry about the freaking passage of time which is so cliche like there are so many other things to make me cry about but instead you choose the thing that I’ve been having a mental breakdown / existential crisis over for the past three years? It feels like a personal attack tbh

THE TEACHER WAS SPEAKING IN THAI COS THEY ARE THAI PEOPLE AND THEN RANDOMLY SAID “oh man good job” IN ENGLISH AND IT WAS SO JARRING I LITERALLY FLINCHED

WIN DONT BE COLD TO YOUR BOYFRIEND WHAT THE FLIP

PORS TRYNA CHEER EVERYONE UP WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT THEM??

AND SOUND’S TRYNA GET YOU TO APOLOGISE COS YOU SAID BLOODY HURTFUL THINGS AND THEN YOU THROW YOUR ARM OUT OF HIS GRIP AND SAY “you won’t get us”, ESSENTIALLY IMPLYING THAT HE’S NOT ONE OF YOU AND HE’S NOT IMPORTANT??? THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOUR

AND SOUND DOESNT EVEN GO AFTER HIM

awhhhh poor Por alone in the music room by himself he needs a hug I would like to give him a hug please

Pat, I love you, I truly do, but shut up please. you’re gonna make Por freaking cry and that’ll make me cry and I’m already gonna cry enough from this episode

POR IS STANDING AT THE PIANO, HE SHOULD SING AND PLAY A SAD SONG BY HIMSELF TO LET HIS EMOTIONS OUT ON THE KEYS, TO FEEL HIS FEELS THROUGH MUSIC

BUT NO ALL HE DOES IS CRY

AND IT MAKES ME CRY

GOSHDARNNIT

“the doctor said I can go home next week!” “Don’t rush it mum. I can survive at home on my own. I just want to make sure you’re okay.” “I’m okay. But when will you get better?” THIS WOMAN ALWAYS SPEAKS THE TRUTH ONLY THE TRUTH AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH AND I LOVE HER

“ever since I woke up, I’ve never seen you song. I usually had to tell you to quit singing.” “……..do you think dad would be disappointed in me?” “What about you? Were you disappointed in him for not being able to release his music? Listen. If we tried our best, there’s nothing to regret. I think your dad would think the same.” BRO HOW IS EVERYTHING SHE SAYS SO FREAKING QUOTABLE

AWW TINN SHOWING UP AT THE HOSPITAL TO VISIT GIM BUT HES JUST TOO LATE I LOVE HIM

OOOOO THEYRE GONNA DO THE PROM NIGHT PERFORMANCE THATS AWESOME

also side note prom night means dates means tinngun soundwin tiwpor I’m very excited

ITS FINALLY TIME FOR PHOTJANEES MENTAL BREAKDOWN OMG FINALLY IVE BEEN WAITING

“do you think we raised him well enough?” YES OFC YOU DID WHAT THE FLIP /gen

“What mistakes do you think we’ve made along the way?” Every parent makes mistakes, man, that’s the way of life, it’s a learning experience for everyone involved. But what’s important is making sure you show your child that you love them and support them and care for them and shESDONE THAT mostly I think. all the things she’s done that could be considered bad or negative were her trying to do what she thought would be best for tinn’s happiness and well-being, even if it didn’t go down that way. You made mistakes, yeah. That’s what makes you freaking human, photjanee.

OKAYOKAYOKAYOKAY TIWPOR PROBABLY HOPEFULLY AND SOUNDWIN PROBABLY HOPEFULLY AND TINNGUN PROBABLY

I was excited for this rehearsal, but win, stop it. “Just cancel this freaking band” seriously, stop. You’re being really cold right now and idk where it’s coming from but it has to stop please.

“I’m out” exCUSE ME???

THE BASS PLAYER CANT JUST QUIT

THE BASS IS THE FREAKING HEART OF THE MUSIC, THE SOUL

IF THERES BO BASS PLAYER THERES NO SOUL SO THERES NO MUSIC

okay sound is going after him it’s okay

and win was disappointed in himself so it make sense now. It’s not healthy to push your own insecurities and fears onto others to feel better, but it does explain his behaviour and hopefully he can find a better coping mechanism

EXCUSE ME WHEN THE F L I P WAS THIS ESTABLISHED??????

I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW PLEASE

COULD SOMEONE PERHAPS INFORM ME OF THIS INFORMATION????

your boyfriend is being super self-hatey? Aggressively force him into a hug and let him let all his anger out while simultaneously letting him know both verbally and physically that you’re there for him and while you might not understand what he’s going through you will listen and do what you can to make him feel happy. I love these two.

its a tinngun scene next and you’ll never guess where they are

✨the freaking pool✨

AND WE GOT A SOUNDWIN SCENE, THEN A TINNGUN SCENE, THEN A TIWPOR SCENE, ALL IN QUICK SUCCESSION THIS IS AMAZING

JFJEJFHDHEHDB TIWPOR DATE TIWPOR DATE TIWPOR DATE

SIR--

AAAAAAAAAA

THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPYYYYYYY

✨oh shoot✨

por fell down the stairs and ✨broke his leg✨

I FINALLY UNDERSTAND THE WISH REDEEMING THING THANK GOODNESS I WAS SO FREAKING CONFUSED

HOW IS HE SO FREAKING POSITIVE ALL THE TIME????

“But Tinn has got a really nice voice, ma’am” gun you’re being real sus she’s about to figure it out

photjanee keeps getting so close to finding out about tinngun and then something interrupts it and it happens every single time

BEACH TRIP PART 2 LETS GOOO

wait a sec they did a bad buddy. They went to the beach and then they went to the beach again. And the second time was in episode 11. why has that happened twice now.

BRO HES WEARING YELLOW

WIN RESERVED A SPOT FOR SOUND AGAIN AND THIS TIME SOUND IS ACTUALLY TAKING THE SPOT I LOVE THEMMMMM

so that fight was freaking intense, they were all having a go at each other, naturally it progressed to just Soundwin yelling but then surprisingly it turned into win and gun.

I rly liked that scene tho, all of them at the height of emotions and they all give really hard but sincere and heartfelt apologies to each other. And then they have a group hug. It’s so sweet, I love all of their group dynamics so freaking much

this man is neurodivergent and I love him with all my soul

tinn’s dad doesn’t have a name. tis character is nameless. but I love him.

NATURALLY TIW HAD TO EMERGE FROM THE SHADOWS FJRJFHFH

TIWPOR ARE SO OBVIOUS

“Did I miss something?? What is happening?” Well, win, you see, you know how you and sound are in love? It’s the same situation with Tiw and por, but you numskulls have been too thick to see it somehow

TIWPOR ARE LITERALLY BOYFRIENDS I LOVE THEM

everyone just coping Soundwin left right and centre okay then

first tinngun with the medal kiss

now tiwpor with the sprinkle water

what’s next, yo and nook are gonna be tied up together? Pat and [insert imaginary character] are gonna have a lot of meaningful interactions in the bathroom?

oh also that song?? It made me cry man. I don’t care what anyone says, this show is a cinematic masterpiece.

the way they’re watching a video of them singing an encouraging song to encourage themselves?

the way they’re suddenly in the room watching??

THE WAY SOUND APPEARS OUT OF NOWHERE???

THE WAY TINN APPEARS OUT OF NOWHERE????

THE WAY THEIR CURRENT SELVES ARE SUDDENLY SINGING TO THEMSELVES?????????

it gave me chills and it gave me tears

I literally can’t describe how much I love this show

the only thing that could’ve made that song better is if Tiw appeared out of nowhere

i CaN wAiT uNtiL yOuRe A uNi StUdEnT dude no one cares about the rule anymore, sound literally said he and win are boyfriends (WHICH BTW W H E N WAS THAT ESTABLISHED?????) just date now

“no matter how long, I’ll always wait for you right here” okay that’s super sweet and all but literally no one cares about the stupid rule just kiss already

yeah okay that explains it. I’d noticed how the only people to say “until they’ve WON hot wave” were that guy and Tinn and Tiw, but everyone else just said until after hot wave so yeah

“Be with me now and you’ll get to use the hashtag #MySchoolPresident” gotta love them subtle title drops lmao

and naturally there’s a cliffhanger on the photjanee plot line. great. like they needed to have something to keep us hooked even tho we're invested literally no matter what, the next episode is the freaking final episode, we're gonna watch it, dont worry gmmtv

MY MAIN TAKEAWAYS

last episode felt way too short but this one felt way too long

I’m still not sure if tiwpor were already secretly dating or if it’s just mutual crushes or if it’s something else BUT they’re going down the tiwpor route for which I am grateful because WE’RE NOT DELUSIONAL HAHA SUCKERS WE WERE RIGHT

WHEN THE FLIP FLAP TICTAC WAS IT ESTABLISHED THAT SOUNDWIN ARE BOYFRIENDS????? DID SOMETHING HAPPEN OFF SCREEN???? I HAVE Q U E S T I O N S

and we have one episode left of this goodnessforsaken show. We have had eleven episodes. We have had about 600 freaking minutes of this show. And Tinn and gun stILL HAVENT KISSED???????? WHAT THE FLIP IS GOING ON

#soundwin #winsound #tiwpor #tiwsonpor #tinngun #satangwinny #winnysatang #mark ford #satang kittiphop #winny thanawin #maek pakin #ford arun #gemini norawit #fourth nattawat #geminifourth #my school president #my school president the series

23 notes · View notes

wooahaes · 1 year

Note

Hi! How are you? Thanks for the recs, I haven't got through all of the solos yet, but I have listened to the Shinee songs. Woof woof is so fun! And the performance of it is so good (also I really liked Key and Taemin's hair, they looked so fluffy lol). Punch drunk love is a bop that I've had on repeat (+the live vid I saw was so entertaining too). I absolutely love 321! Also Atlantis, mttm + ready or not. 3!6!5! by Golcha (?) is such an uplifting song too! Thanks for recommending them -🍧

If you couldn't tell from the previous ask, I really like what I've seen of Shinee and am thinking of looking into them further he he. They seem to be everything I thought kpop was before I started listening to it - bright, colourful, fun and a little bit weird, but in a good way (which is why I think I love svt and mmm because they fit that in my opinion). I'd meant to get back to you about it sooner, sorry! Thanks once again, it really has helped make me feel a bit better! 🍧

omg hi!! i'm glad you're feeling a lil better!! take care of yourself <3

i love the woof woof performance so much lol some ppl hate the song but i think it's fun <3 literally they are all so radiant in that concert tbh. my discord pfp used to be taemin from this performance lmao its low quality but i love he <3

admittedly i havent made my way all the way through the shinee world V concert but the punch drunk love performance <3 i just love their energy tbh... no one is doing is like shinee tbh i just love them so much

fun fact: 3 2 1 was written by the big time rush guys! (the music at least--the lyrics weren't)

i cannot remember if i said golcha or golden child but they are one in the same lol <3 golcha is just. shortened <3 golden child has a lot of fun bops tbh their more recent stuff has been edgier by comparison but theyre such an underrated group tbh

shinee has a lot of fun music tho!! the princes of kpop <3 (they're kings in my heart, but the official title of kings of pop goes to other groups (bigbang and i've vaguely heard it used for super junior?)) i'm just happy to share the shinee love since they were my first group (and the group that got me back into kpop) and honestly one of the best groups to serve as an introduction to kpop.

no need to apologize!! take ur time and take care of urself <3 i'm glad you enjoyed the recs tho!!

#🍧 anon #wooahaes.ask #ive been a lil absent lately haha so this was a nice ask to see <3 #i hope you're taking care of yourself <33

3 notes · View notes

tuxedokit · 1 year

Note

norma/dion

OOOOOOH THE FOILS this is an interesting dynamic

when i started shipping it, if i did:

idk if i ship it !!!

my thoughts:

i can definitely see the appeal, what with them both having venom to spit and immediate regret to follow. they both try and try so hard to be good, but they keep finding themselves hurting the ones around them and regretting it, but regret doesn't undo what they've done. i think they would either bond heavily over that or hate each other for it because all they can see in one another is what they hate about themselves. the more i write this, the more im interested in the ship

what makes me happy about them:

the idea of them seeing each other and finally having someone who gets it. someone who understands, cause frazie and lizzie mught say they get it but theyve never spat acid at those they loved, at people who were innocent. they might have snarked and teased, but never said things as hurtful as dion and norma had. and they look at each other, and they finally feel seen. finally, someone understands. im not alone.

what makes me sad about them:

exactly what makes me happy about them. turn it around, now theres someone there who keeps acting like you, and reflecting to you how shitty youve been. you look at this girl and did she really just say that? to a ten year old? jesus christ. you maybe find yourself scolding her, yelling at her, because who says something like that to someonenthey claim to love?! but... so did you. you dont really hate her, do you? no, that's not quite right... no. you understand her. you understand her, and you hate yourself for it.

things done in fanfic that annoy me:

when theyre written as terrible people, who meant all the harm they caused. no idea if its been done but like i feel it in my heart that its been done (ik its been done ab dion)

things i look for in fanfic:

i have never once read a dion/norma fanfic

who i'd be comfortable with them ending up with, if not each other:

i... dont... know? the more i think about this ship, the more it makes sense to me.

my happily ever after for them:

THERAPY. and apologies. them being right there next to one another, supporting each other through the shame of acknowledging they were in the wrong and the sting of owning up to it and saying sorry. because no one else they know quite understands it like they do. no one else was that cruel. no one else felt that ice in their veins right after saying something so hurtful. so who else would be better suited to help them heal than each other, who understand?

big spoon/little spoon:

dion

favourite activity:

playfully shit talking the other junior agents, people watching and commenting on peoples outfits.... and crying together. they get into screaming matches sometimes, but they always come back together because they know they'll understand and they both feel so bad and they know she does too

#carpet conversation #ask game #dion/norma #psychonauts #dion aquato #norma natividad #shit i might actually ship this now

3 notes · View notes

madisonrooney · 1 year

Note

Honestly that exhibit is what inspired me to ask that question, I love going to museums and I think one specifically dedicated to Disney Channel would be really cool especially in regards to newer stuff as well as stuff older than like you said the “popular era” just overall it would be a neat attraction.

For this next query we talk a lot about books in the discord would you rather see your favorite series/movie turned into a book or would you rather see your favorite book with a disney channel take like a tv show laugh track and all? which ones and what elements would you change in the transfer?

I personally think seeing High School Musical as a Jane Austen novel would be funny or just that or other disney channel projects in full novels for like adult reading levels (as much as the Camp Rock Junior Novels rock that is) - ❄️🎄

truth be told, i do not read 🙈 i loved to when i was a little but as i got older it got more challenging for me to the point where its very difficult for me now (its probably undiagnosed adhd)

but! one series i grew up loving was kingdom keepers, which i think has been talked about in the discord. i dont remember which book i left off on, i dont think ive read them since 2015? but thats a series that id definitely make an effort at resuming/finishing. id always hoped itd become a movie or tv show and i think there have been talks about it, or at least rumors, but nothing has happened. but now that we have disney+, i feel like it could be possible since theyre making stuff with lesser known IPs. so i guess that wouldnt make it a disney channel show, but i feel like it could be a disney+ show in the style of both disney channel and disney+'s single cam teen sitcoms, like andi mack, ultra violet & black scorpion, hsmtmts, diary of a future president, etc. probably mostly like uv&bs tho bc it would be more of an action/adventure type show.

#gcwca secret santa

2 notes · View notes

lovcyme · 2 years

Note

Can you make an KuroKen Fanfic abt them like comforting eachother when their day's going bad?

Hello anon tysm for this ask !! This is a bit messy bc it's literally 3am here as I write this but I hope you like this !!

note: i used headcanon pronouns for kenma and i use they/them on them and theyre non-binary bc theyre not into gendered shit here just a heads up

pt. 1/1

tw: homophobia

This is proofread !! ✅

"Kenma, what's up ? The expression you have looks like hell." the older male said, observing his partner's facial features.

The junior looks up from their game as they gave their boyfriend an irritated look. "It's nothing, Kuro." they said, clearly irritated at something. Tetsurou knows something is indeed wrong by his partner's tone.

"Doesn't seem like nothing when your face looks like the first time you had to toss to Lev." the black-haired male said cheekily.

His partner ignored him which made Tetsurou suspect that something serious probably happened. Choosing to respect his partner's boundaries for now, they continued to walk to the train station.

After they have sat down in the train, Tetsurou's suspicions start to become more likely as Kenma put their PSP away. It was an unlikely occurrence, one that Tetsurou rarely sees. However, Tetsurou knew this state would make his partner uncooperative. He usually would have to wait for a while before he could get them to open up so he waited until they got to their neighborhood.

Arriving at Kenma's house, Tetsurou spoke up. "Hey Ken, I think we need to talk. Somethin' seems to be bothering ya so I'll be here for a while. I already texted my dad so there's no need to worry." he spoke with a hint of concern in his voice. "I-... I understand. Let's go in." Kenma spoke rather nonchalantly, but they knew and understood their boyfriend's concern, they just didn't know how to project those feelings.

As the two entered their house, Mrs. Kozume greeted them both as the two greeted her back politely. In a somehow awkward but comfortable silence the two walked to Kenma's room. Allowing themselves to indulge in the privacy of their room.

"So, what happened that made you so upset ?" Tetsurou inquired, placing his bag down as his partner immediately sat on the bed. Tetsurou waited patiently for his partner to respond, not wanting to pressure them.

Tetsurou heard a long sigh from his partner. "I'm just tired of people being stupid. Like, why can't they just be open-minded ?" they said, clearly frustrated at the thought. Tetsurou does not understand what his partner was saying. Instead of telling them to explain more, he simply waited as he sat on their desk chair.

"They don't get that I'm non-binary and that I'm not into being tied down to the gender spectrum." they ranted more, leaning their face on their palms. "Is it really hard to respect someone's identity ? Or is it just because their brain isn't working properly due to their lack of knowledge."

Tetsurou just listened to his partner rant about their situation. He didn't want to interrupt them. He knew very well that they don't always open up so this was a good chance to just let them be them.

The smaller person continued to rant about the homophobes in their school, letting their anger and frustration take over as they know that their partner is listening to them and allowing them to release their pent up anger.

"I could've thrown a chair at him, seriously. And the fucking audacity to call me gross for dating you ?! I know this'll sound cheesy but what's so wrong with being true to myself and loving someone with the same biological sex ?" They said, flopping on their bed feeling relieved to finally have let those feelings out.

Their boyfriend who had been listening to them rant looked at them and sighed as well.

"I understand how you feel, Ken, I really do. And honestly I would be frustrated too. Your feelings are valid, don't worry." he started.

"It's unfair that a lot of people tend to invalidate your identity, in all honesty. And y'know what I'll give them a beating if they say something that hurts you." Tetsurou said which stunned Kenma because they never said that it hurt them, but knowing their boyfriend he probably read them.

"Yeah, it's a lot to take in. Being referred to as a boy, being misgendered and using the wrong pronouns on me...It's just unsettling." Kenma sat up, locking eyes with their boyfriend.

"But I've got your back. I know it's so frustrating to be invalidated but you have the entire team, plus Karasuno to validate your identity. I'd say Bokuto's team validates you too."

Kenma's lips quirked up a bit and he let out a small smile which made Tetsurou smile back fondly. The smaller person spread their arms, signaling the older male to come closer and embrace them to which the latter did.

That night, they enjoyed each other's presence and company, not wanting to let go even for one second.

hope you enjoyed this piece !! ik its a bit short but i tried !! its hard when you dont have enough sleep. so sorry if this is rushed and it mostly talking about kenma !! ^^' ill probably make a part 2 with kuroo's part but ill try !!

reblogs are not necessary but v appreciated <3

#haikyuu #anime #kuroken #fluff #anime fluff #mlm concept #nblm safe #lgbtlove #haikyuu kuroo #haikyuu kenma

2 notes · View notes

shop-cailey · 4 months

Video

youtube

‘BRING - IT - ON: FIGHT 2 THE FINISH’ - EAST - LA

EAST - LOS ANGELES - CALIFORNIA - CA

THEY - DIDN’T - OBEY - HER - THE ASSIST

BECAUSE - A - VIRGIN - WHAT - SHE YES

WORE - THEY - WANT - SKIN - THEY - DO

WANT - BARBIE - LATINA - LIKE - TRUE

CHANEL - OF - ‘THE - CHEETAH GIRLS’

THEY - WANT - HER - 2 - LOOK - LIKE A

LEADER - HER - HAIR - THEY - WANT

HER - 2 - SHOW - MORE - SKIN - THE

ULTIMATE - ‘LATINA - BARBIE’

THEIR - CAPTAIN - WITHOUT - TRUE

THINKING - IS - ‘BARBIE - LATINA’

SKIN - BEAUTIFUL - SHOWS - WHO

SHE - IS - BEAUTIFUL - WHILE WE

ARE - YOUNG - AND - NON-WRINKLED

BUT - SAD - THEY - DIDN’T - SHARE

WHAT - SHE - NEEDS - 2 - LOOK XO

LIKE - WHAT - A - LEADER - LOOKS

LIKE - SO - AS - THEY - HAVE - NEW

LOCATIONS - SAME - FAILURE - AS

2 - LOOKING - AT - MAGAZINES

WHO - KIDS - AND - TEENS YES

LISTEN - 2 - WHO - THEY OBEY

WHY - SHOULD - SHE - START

A - FAMILY - JUST - 2 - HAVE

OBEDIENT - KIDS - WHO WILL

LOVE - AND - LISTEN - 2 HER

THEIR - LATINA - MOTHER

SCHOOL - IS - ALSO - A - BREAKING

GROUND - ON - HOW - 2 - SUCCEED

BUT - TEENS - KIDS - NEED - 2 B YES

TOLD - WHAT - 2 - DO - LIKE - DISNEY

‘PROM - PACT’

SCHOOL - PSYCHOLOGIST - NOT

ALLOWED - 2 - PRESCRIBE MEDS

SHE - SAID - ‘I - CAN’T - TELL YOU

WHAT - 2 - DO’ - WRONG - WRONG

TEENS - KIDS - NEED - 2 B - TOLD

WHAT - 2 - DO - WHETHER - THEY

OBEY - OR - NOT - IS - UP 2 THEM

KIDS - OBEY - 2 - MAKE - PEACE

NOT - BECAUSE - THEY AGREE

ALSO - AS - THEY - ESCAPE THE

LIFE - THEY’RE - TOLD - 2 - LIVE

BUT - PUBLIC - SCHOOL - WE’RE

CLOSING - AS - DEMOCRATS - AS

THEY’VE - NEVER - TOLD - THEM

WHAT - 2 - DO - AS - THEY - $$$$$

MURDER - ROB - NOT - TOLD YES

WHAT - 2 - DO - CLOSING - DOWN

OF - WHO - NEEDS - 2 - TELL THEM

WHAT - 2 - DO - AS - KIDS - & TEENS

HOLY BIBLE - GOD’s - COMMANDS

GOD - TELLING - US - WHAT 2 - DO

NOTHING - LESS - 2 - LIVE - THE LIFE

HE - GAVE - US - ON - EARTH - GOD

CONSTANTLY - TELLS US WHAT 2 DO

CLOSING - DOWN - OF - VIOLENT AND

STUPID - PLACES - TELLING - KIDS

AND - TEENS - IT’s - UP 2 U - NO NO

NO - DUMB - PLACES - NOT TELLING

KIDS - AND - TEENS - WHAT - 2 - DO

CLOSING - DOWN - OF - THEYRE

WASTING - OUR - RESIDENTIAL

PROPERTY - TAXES - AS THEY

MURDER - ROB - GIVE ASSAULT

AND - BATTERY - VERBAL ABUSE

CRUEL - AND - UNUSUAL - TRUE

PUNISHMENTS - INFLICTED SAD

CLOSING - OF - PUBLIC SCHOOLS

CLOSING - OF - PUBLIC - MANY

COLLEGES - UNIVERSITIES WILL

B - CLOSED - ROBBERY - OF $$$

NEVER - LEARNT - ANYTHING IN

COLLEGE - THOUSANDS OF $$$

NOT - GOING - 2 - MIAMI - DADE

COLLEGE - OLD - PEOPLE - ARE

STILL - LOOKING - 4 MY GRADES

MADE - MISTAKE - SHOULD HAVE

GONE - 2 - WHERE - GIRLS - KISSED

GIRLS - IN - THEIR - GARDEN - TELL

ABOUT - THEM - 4 - EXPULSION - ME

SHOULD - HAVE - FINISHED - JUNIOR

SENIOR - HIGH SCHOOL - ALL SPORTS

INCLUDING - FOOTBALL - CATHOLIC

FULL - UNIFORM - GOD - BEAUTIFUL

NAVY - TOP - BOTTOM - LONG SOCKS

WHEN - COLD - GORGEOUS - & - COED

UNFORGETTABLE - PROM - FOOTBALL

GAMES - THEN - USC - FOOTBALL TOO

HIGHER - SAT - SCORE - MORE - ADDITION

2ND - YEAR - PRINCETON - UNIVERSITY

MARCHING - BAND - ACCOUNTING TOO

3RD - 4TH YEAR - UNIVERSITY OF PARIS

THEN - NOT - HOMELESS - MIAMI WOULD

HAVE - BEEN - FREE - TRAINS - AND FULL

OF - MURDERS - ROBBERIES - WHAT

HAPPENED - 2 - ME - CHANGES - USA

FOREVER - 4 - WE - HAVE - DECLARED

WAR - ON - THE - USA - HAITI - SPANISH

SPEAKING COUNTRIES - KOREA 4 EVER

300 MILLION - CHINESE - MALES

FRONT LINES - 7′1 FT - 7 FT

2ND - LINE - 6′8 FT - 6′7 FT - 6′5 FT

HOW - POSSIBLE - OUR - LASER - AS MY

TOKYO - MALE - SCIENTISTS - INCREASING

OUR - HEIGHTS - AS - GIRLS - WE BECOME

5′9 FT - IN - LA FITNESS - BLK - MALE - USA

KINESEOLOGY - SAID - I’M - REALLY - LIKE

PIA WURTZBACK - HUGE - EYES

HUGE - BREASTS

THAT - MY - PARENTS - ARE - PHILIPPINE

I - CAME - FR - VAGINAL - AREA - OF LIKE

PIA’s - MOM - MISS UNIVERSE - 2015

BELIEVE - ME - MY - EYES - ARE - NOT

SPANISH - HUGE

MY - BREASTS - ARE - INTERNATIONAL

SILICONE - NON-LEAKABLE

THEIR - LEGS - HAVE - ALWAYS - BEEN

UGLY - AND - SO SO

MY - LEGS - ARE - EUROPEAN - TRULY

SPECTACULAR

HE - SAID - OF - NO - MAYBE - I - AM

EURASIAN - ASIAN - EUROPEAN

I - TOLD - HIM - I - KNOW - I’M - FR

MY - TOKYO - MOM’s - VAGINAL - AREA

WHEN - SHE - WORE - LIGHT - COLORED

SKIRTS - DRESSES - I - SAW - TOKYO

JAPAN - NERD - GIRLS - L SIDE - AND

TOKYO - NERD - BOYS - R SIDE - AS

THEY - HATED - EACH - OTHER AND

FOUGHT - A - LOT - IN - PUBLIC TOO

HER - LAST - WILL - TESTAMENT

CERTAIN - TIME - BODY - CREMATED

NATURALLY - I - CAN - TAKE - A LOOK

HER - PINK - KIMONO - GONE - THEIR

SANDALS - CREMATED - WITH - HER

ONLY - THINGS - LEFT - HER JEWELS

WHICH - WAS - CLEANED

ONLY - HER - JEWELRY - SURVIVED

HER - NATURAL - CREMATION - THE

CLOTHES - SANDALS DISAPPEARED

SAID - I’M - SAME - HEIGHT - AS HER

WITH - MANUAL - MEASUREMENT

THAT - 300 LBS - COWS - STEP ON

DR BLAISE KOVAZ - ALSO - HAS YES

MANUAL - HEIGHT - AND - SCALE AS

THEY - ABUSED - ME - ALSO - JUST 2

SHOW - MY - VAGINAL - AREA - AS NO

USA - GYNOCOLOGIS/OBYN - EVER

SAYS - PAPS SMEAR - 4 - NON-VIRGINS

WHO - ARE - ACTIVE - 2 - STOP - YES

CERVIX - CANCER - DEADLY/PAINFUL

NOT - 4 - VIRGINS - BUT - AGE 246

WHAT - U - DEAL - WITH - AND SO

DR HISPANIC - INSISTED - CALLED

BIRTH CONTROL - A - JOKE - THAT

HER - MEN - CAN’T - KNOCK - UP

ANY - GIRL - ON - PILLS - 2 DAYS

RESENTMENT - OF - MOMS WHO

ARE - CATHOLIC - THEIR RELIGION

LOST - THEIR - POWER - AND GRIP

12 KIDS - REQUIRED - BY - PRIESTS

SO - THEY - RAVAGED - WHIPPED

BLED - BACKS - UNTIL - 12 - KIDS

PRODUCED - BEATEN - BATTERED

MURDERED - AFTER - 12 KIDS TOO

BOXED - KICKED - WHIPPED - AND

WHIPPED - THEN - WATER - LATER

VINEGAR - PUT - ON - BLOODY YES

BACKS - AN - AMERICAN - FEMALE

AND - CLINIC - INVENTED - WORLD’s

1ST - BIRTH - CONTROL - PILLS AS

THEY - WERE - ARRESTED - AND

YOUR - POLICE - 2 - KEEP - OTHERS

SAFE - EASY - 2 - KNOCK - UP EASY

WOMEN - BURNT - BIRTH CONTROL

IS - IMPORTANT - CLINICS - BURNT

THEIR - BUILDINGS - LOCAL POLICE

BURNT - THESE - BUILDINGS - AND

ARRESTED - ALL - WOMEN - WHO

THEY - ASKED - WHERE - ON THE

PILLS - BLK - POLICE - BOXED - THE

BLK - FEMALES - ON - THE - PILL - 2

HAITI - MALE - POLICE - ALL - OVER

MIAMI - THEY - CAN’T - ARREST ON

BIRTH - CONTROL - PILLS - YES

ANYMORE - THEY’RE - NOW - YES

ARRESTING - WHO - USE - TENTS

AIR - MATS - THEY - WANT - ALL - 2

B - ON - SIDE - WALKS - MY - TENT

MADE - IN - CHINA - IS - DESIGNED

4 - MIAMI - POLICE - NY - POLICE

CA - POLICE - LAPD - NYPD - ETC

THEY VELCRO - UP - 2 C - BLONDE

AND - HER - PANTY - SHOWING - IS

ASLEEP - 2 - IDENTIFY - BRALESS

BLONDE - AS - THEIR - PEE PEE

ERECTS - LESBIAN - MIAMI - POLICE

FEMALES - AS - THEY - TOUCH YES

THEIR - BREASTS - AS - THEY - HAI

ORGASM - BLONDE - NO - BRA - AS

SHE - SLEEPS - HER - PANTY - ITS

SHOWING - AS - VELCRO - BACK

THE - L SIDE - R SIDE - IT - YES

ANSWERS - IF - THERE - IS - XO

ANYONE - INSIDE - TENT

MIAMI - FUTURE

LIBERAL - PARTY

REPUBLICAN - PARTY - OF - FLORIDA

STRONGER - GUN - RIGHTS

14TH - AMENDMENT - REMOVING

LAST - PART

SECTION 1

I FEEL - SORRY - 4 - THOMAS JEFFERSON

CANDLES - FEATHER - AND - INK - 2 WRITE

ALL - AMENDMENTS - AND - CONSTITUTION

ONLY - LAWS - OF - USA - AGE 246

ALL - THEIR - SPEECHES - EXTREMELY

DIFFICULT - AND - SO - LONG - COULD

NOT - UNDERSTAND - NEVER - WANT 2

UNDERSTAND - THEIR - ENGLISH

MY - ANCESTOR - SIR PATRICK HENRY

VIRGINIA - LAWYER - I - UNDERSTOOD

HIM - HE - WASN’T - EXCITED - ABOUT

CONSTITUTION - AND - AMENDMENTS

ALL - THESE - MEN - WERE - FIGHTING

EACH - OTHER - LOTS - OF OPPOSITES

... ‘NOR - DENY - 2 - ANY - PERSON

(POOR - NO - MONEY - EVER - HOMELESS

TAX - EVASION - PERSONS - DISABLED OR

MISSING - BODY - PARTS - KIDS - ETC)

WITHIN - ITS - JURISDICTION

(MIAMI - DADE COUNTY)

(CITIES - LISTED - UNDER)

THE - EQUAL - PROTECTION - OF THE -

LAWS

THESE - PARTIES - MIAMI - POLICE AND

HONORABLES - JUDGES - COUNTY YES

EMPLOYEES - REMOVING - WORDS HAI

‘EQUAL - PROTECTION - OF - THE LAWS’

LISTEN - HOMELESS - THE - POOR - WITH

NO - MONEY - NEVER - HAD - MONEY THE

DISABLED

COUNTY - EMPLOYEES - OF - FLORIDA

WEEKDAYS - EMPLOYEES

NEW - WORK - LAWS

6 DAYS - MON - 2 - SATURDAYS

2 - STRETCH - OUT - 25 HOURS

‘UNTIL - THEN’ - COUNTY - EMPLOYEES

WILL - B SINCE FLORIDA - NOT GRANTED

NEVER - ALLOWED - OPEN - CARRY - ANY

WEAPON - FIREARMS - COMBAT - KNIVES

TEXAS - 28TH - STATE - OPEN - CARRY

NOT - FLORIDA - 27TH - STATE - FORMER

TERRITORY - WAS - SPANISH - COLONY

HONORABLES - 14TH - ‘WITH - DUE YES

PROCESS - OF - LAW’ - JUDGES - ARE

PROTECTED - DURING - COURT - BY

MIAMI - POLICE - AND - RIFFLES - SHERIFFS

MORE - PROTECTION - THAN - KINGS - TRUE

OTHERS - ARE - DISARMED - SO - WE’RE YES

CLOSING - ALL - COURTHOUSES

$700 TRILLION - FR - TAXES - EVERY - 3 MONTHS

EVERYONE - GIVEN - SAME - TIME - THUS - THEY

ARE - DOING - FELONY - ‘HINDRANCE - DELAY OF

INCOME’ - JUDGES - DON’T - MAKE - MUCH

WHEN - CRIMES - HAPPEN - THEY - PROFIT

POLICE - SHERIFFS - GUARDING - MAKING

$$$$ - COURTHOUSES - CLOSING - ENDING

ONLINE - 24/7 - ANY - LULL - IN - TALKING AS

ALEXA - TAKES - OVER - WITH - ALL - THE

EVIDENCE - SUBMITTED

CRIMINAL - OWES - $1.7 BILLION

3 DAYS - STATE - PRISON

REMEMBER - ALL - ABOVE - PROFIT

WITH - CRIMINAL - ACTIVITY CRIME

MANY - HONORABLES - LOW - GPA

PUBLIC - DOMAIN - PUT - 2 PRISON

ILLEGAL - WORK - HUGE - $$$$$$$$

FINES - BASE - ON - GRADE POINT

AVERAGE - MANY - GRADUATES R

UNEMPLOYED - BEST - 2 PRESIDE

JURY - DUTY - SELECTION - DONE

IN - ADVANCE - SECONDS - 2 YES

ANSWER

2383478392047203

24728937Q3097430

73984729047238047

ADD - THEM - SECONDS - YES

CAN’T - ANSWER - ONE

THANK - U 4 - TRYING - 2 - BECOME

JURY - EMAIL - SENDING - 2 - ASK

4 - QUALIFYING - AGAIN

‘UNTIL - THEN’

7TH - AMENDMENT

REVISED - SUITS - COMMON - LAW

VALUE - IN - CONTROVERSY - EXCEED

$20 - RIGHT - OF - TRIAL - BY - JURY

FOREVER - FREE

SHALL - B - PRESERVED

THEY - TELL - US - 4 OR - 5

ONLINE - WILL - B - 25 - IN - JURY

THEY - WILL - B - PAID - INTERNATIONAL

FUNDS - THIS - TIME - JURY - HOURS

NEW - LAWS

HOW - A - BILL - BECOMES - A - LAW

ONLINE - COURTHOUSES - USA

30 STATES - STAND - YOUR - GROUND - LAWS

20 STATES - OTHERS

JURY - 15 HRS - WEEKLY

WORK - 25 HRS - FULL - TIME - WEEKLY

18 AND OLDER

7 AND 8 MONTHS - NOT ALLOWED AS PREGNANT

30 STATES - STAND - YOUR - GROUND - LAWS

PER - HOUR - $20,000 - TAX - PAID

NO - OVERTIME

20 STATES - OTHERS

PER - HOUR - $15,000 - TAX - PAID

FINAL - 3 QUESTIONS - 4 - THEY - QUALIFIED

GPA - MUST - B - 4.000 - OR - HIGHER 4 JURY

THOSE - NOT - 24/7 - HOURS -

DEMOCRATIC - PARTY

DEMOCRATS

INCREASE - YOUR - FORMER - GPA

THE - RESULTS - YOUR - FINAL GPA

FOR - COLLEGE - WORK - OVERSEAS - REFERENCE

FREE - INCREASE - YOUR - GPA

TRAINING - U - WHAT - IT - TAKES

6 PACK - ABS - MUSCULAR - ABS

FREE - VIDEOS - 2 - ACCOMPLISH

TRAINING - WITH - MANDATORY

EDUCATION - GRAMMAR - MATH

INCREASE - YOUR - GPA

4.000 - 5.000 - 6.000 - 10.000 - 12.000

UNLIMITED - ACCOUNTS - 2 - INCREASE

HARVARD - IVY LEAGUE - WILL ACCEPT

YOUR - PERMANENT - GPA

USA - ONLINE - COURTHOUSES - 24/7

CHRISTMAS - DAY - FEDERAL HOLIDAYS

GPA - REQUIREMENTS

JUDGES - HONORABLES

JURY - DUTY

BOTH - 4.000 - REQUIRED

UNTIL - FULFILLED - AUTO - JUDGES

ALEXA - AMAZON - PRESIDING JUDGE

WHERE - WERE - YOU - THE - RECEIPTS

OF - SHOPPING - DINING - AMAZON PRIME

AS - KEYBOARDS - IN - FUTURE - WILL HAVE

THEY - WILL - KNOW - YOUR - FINGERPRINTS

AMAZON - PRIME

SHOPPING - DINNING - TRAVEL

ALEXA - WILL - TELL - STUPIDS - YOUR

EXACT - PRESENCE - AS - YOUR ALIBI

2 - DEFEND - CAN’T - B - IN - 2 PLACES

AT - SAME - TIME

FUTURE - PSYCHIATRISTS - REVOKED

OCCUPATION - MIDWIVES - NURSE OF

GYNECOLOGY - GYNECOLOGISTS

CHIROPRACTORS - ALL - REVOKED

PSYCHIATRIC - MEDS - REVOKED

OF - USA - ALL - PRODUCE DEATHS

WORDS - BY - US - POLICE

‘DO - U - WANT - 2 - HARM - YOURSELF

OR - OTHERS’ - THEIR - SPEECH - IS AN

ILLEGAL - STATEMENT - OVERSEAS

TORTURE

HANDCUFFS - INHUMAN - TREATMENT

HANDCUFFS - WILL - B - REMOVED BY

THE - DEMOCRATIC - PARTY

ILLEGAL - WORLDWIDE

MIAMI - MILITARY - FORCE

MACHINE - GUNS - SHOOT - THEIR THIGHS

THEIR - BUTTOCKS - AREA - ALL THAT FAT

APPENDIX - AREA - ALSO - QUITE - SAFE

LESS - THAN - TIC TAC - SIZE

SHOT - AT - FEELS - LIKE - A - NICE WARM

FIREPLACE - INSIDE

KNIFING - IS - GROSS - FEELS - COLD YES

COLD - GOING - INSIDE - YOUR - BODY HAI

AUTO - MACHINE - GUNS

DON’T - NEED - HANDCUFFS

GOING - 2 - NEAR - A - PERSON

2 - CONFIDENT - ABOUT - CRIMINALS

SO - THAT’s - THE - FUTURE

30 STATES - NO - HANDCUFFS

OBEYING - WORLD - LAWS

NO - MORE - PSYCHIATRISTS - THEY’RE - YES

STRANGE - DOCTORS - WHO - GOT - ILLEGAL

JOB - SECURITY - WITH - HONORABLES YES

QUESTIONABLE - COLLEGE - GRADUATES

WELL - 3:43P EST - HAVEN’T - EATEN - YET

EATING - NOW - BUT - USA

30 STATES - NO - HANDCUFFS - COMING

#youtube

0 notes

wlwesque · 4 years

Text

your chaotically wholesome mentor wei wuxian

#hanguang jun come pick up your husband hes a mess around the kids #the untamed #cql #mdzs #wei wuxian #wei ying #juniors #jin ling #lan sizhui #lan jingyi #mo dao zu shi #i love the juniors have i said i love the juniors? i really do theyre so fun #untamed #wwx #i couldve giffed more scenes but my netflix is down f #but every wwx juniors scene is so fun i love them #and mentor wwx is so funny

4K notes · View notes

ennoshawty · 3 years

Text

HQ CAPTAINS AS THINGS

i was bored and felt like doing a crackfic thing but i didn’t have any solid themes or good ideas

SO I PRESENT TO YOU - THE CAPTAINS. AS THINGS. IDK HOW TO WORD THIS BUT YOU’LL SEE AS WE GO ALONG.

warnings: VERY LONG, slandering a crybaby oikawa (lovingly), mentions f!reader, shitposting, mentions of violence in kita's, (a bit) yandere!kita, cursing, unedited, me being an idiot

officer!daichi

we are: vigilante/troublemaker

loving the enemies-to-lovers trope so much

nah bro you ain’t full criminal (bc my preppy ass could never) you just do the small vandalism things y’know like drawing peepees on government buildings and knocking over bins

u literally confessed to him by spraypainting the entire billboard by his workplace “I LIKE YOU” like way to go girl

He didn’t appreciate the creative graffiti but he rlly likes u so all u had to do was clean it and then next thing u know yall are out on a cute cafe date

but let’s talk about before yall got together

he’d CHASE u thru alleyways when he’d catch you writing “police sux” on the fuckin wall

bro is NOT AT ALL afraid to jump onto the roofs it’s FRIGHTENING to see this huge ass police officer storm after u

HES SO FAST HOT DAMN WOMAN HOW DO U GET AWAY FROM HIM??? USAIN BOLT WHOMST???

you’d almost always get away by a hair - he’s SO SO close

and it frustrates him but excites u oooooo arrest me shawty

and this would continue for a while

but yall have such fun fun banter - you’d tease him and he’d say something back and you’d bolt and he’d chase

some days he’d catch you. but in those times u slip away somehow

he’s having so much fun and doesn’t even know it

and then at one point he doesn’t even care about bringing u to justice anymore. he knows it’s bad for business and it’s unprofessional but he’s so attracted to u

he doesn’t even know it. HES IN DENIAL!!! his mind: “oh i’m just asking about her so that i know her motives” bruh no u just asked about our fav pastry this aint about crime anymore

and when he finally gets it,,,DINGDINGDINGDING SOUND THE ALARMS !!! MAN IS WHIPPED!! he’s more shy around u awww,,,doesn’t even want to chase u anymore but he will still engage in banter w u.

yall get a little peace treaty in the lil crush stage - you both are kinda aware of ur feelings towards each other but don't really wanna mess it up and jeopardize whatever's going on like bros PLEASE JUST KISS ITS INFURIATING

it’s more of a competition to see who will break the other first (and you lost he’s too hot)

he lets u joyride his cop car in an empty parking lot <3 he is the one <3 this is true love

u gotta marry him right now bro no excuses

u are no longer on the crime side of the law,,,u support him and only him fuck the rest of the cops (i’m jk of course...or am i)

u are his badass sidekick <3 unofficially of course until he marries u

u help him with the small things like helping lost children find their parents and helping old ladies cross the street

but you want to do the FUN stuff - chasing thieves and arresting drunkards.

unfortunately, he loves u too much to put u in danger so he keeps u from doing the dangerous things

after some protesting later, he trusts u to take care of urself. and now yall have a competition just like old times - whoever catches the most baddies at the end of the month wins (he WILL scold u if ur too reckless though)

THE TWO OF U ARE JUST GOOD COP BAD COP UHAHAHAHAHAHA

but it’s much more complicated than that - it’s either ur the laidback one and he’s the strict one or ur the fiery one and he’s the person like “calm down”

PLEASE HE HATES BRINGING U TO INTERROGATIONS he’s trying to be serious but you keep making him laugh istg he has to kick u out each time

u still make him laugh when u pout-glare at him thru the glass

bro says he’s not the stereotypical cop but the moment u surprise him with donuts and coffee in the morning he will make out w u right then and there

even though yall dating he still won’t let u play with his equipment

but sometimes u grab his walkie talkie when he’s not looking and prank call the others

and his coworkers know by now they’re like “oh it’s daichis gf” and go along with it HAHAHAHA “this is alpha 1, daichi just contracted ligma, over.” “roger, but what’s ligma? over.” “*inhale* LIGMA-” *daichi takes the walkie talkie back*

his coworkers are chill lmaoooo they love u two as a couple THEY ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE they planned a surprise anniversary party of when u joined the force (unofficially)

the juniors tanaka and noya are jelly ooooo but they respect their captain <3

u loooooove hanging out w the starry-eyed new recruit hinata and he’s bouncing around asking u personal questions “how did you date the commander!!! what’s he like as a bf??” he also accidentally exposes how much daichi talks about u in the office before he drags him away and murders him off camera

he does get u a walkie talkie that’s just connected to his line, tho. for emergencies. it’s ur second phone basically that only has his number in it

daichi LOVES it when u massage him after he’s had a long day but his shoulders are stiff as a statue,,,he’s also super stronk and can carry u anywhere <333

IMAGINE HE HAS A POLICE DOG - he doesn’t, but he’ll get one of his buddies to bring u a k9 unit so u can pet it and when he sees how happy u are he considers getting one PLSSS IT WOULD FIT HIM HELPPP

bro is VERY strict on safety. bulletproof glass in yalls house. alarms + cameras everywhere. trackers on every device. underground bunker. (just kidding lol)

daichi teaches u self-defense and gets u a bejeweled taser for ur bday <333 MARRY THIS MAN RIGHT NOW OR I’LL-

in other words i love daichi and he is husband material WIFE ME UP BUDDY

househusband!oikawa

we are: girlboss sugar mommy

somehow you tamed this bish to becoming your obedient malewife

and by obedient i mean whiny but compliant

IS MORE ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK CARD THAN TO YOU. I SAID IT. THE TRUTH.

sure, he’s pretty and gives affection sometimes but the only time he’s bein cute and snuggly w u is when a new fendi purse came out and he wants it

his specialty is cooking but he’s so lazy he’s all “just get the maid to do it”

please give ur workers a raise he’s so demanding

when you take him to ur business parties hes ALWAYS bragging about you and ur large house with this and that and his favorite: indoor hot tub. he always brings up the indoor hot tub.

only reason you bring him is cuz he’s pretty and he whines when you leave him alone for too long

yall cant even stay for too long - he’ll practically drag u out of the building and whining that it’s too hot and his suit is too stuffy and to call a limo

he’s not afraid to embarrass u if u dont give him what he wants and he will spit out food at a formal dinner if its not to his liking

probably in competition w househusbands! makki and mattsun about who gets the best house so he’s constantly begging u for an extension to the house “please babe!!! makki has-” “no.”

8/10 times throws tantrums in public and 1465/10 times throws tantrums in the house

he wants to cry for the sake of crying. one time he lost his shirt and he wouldn’t stop bawling for 15 min

please find him a hobby

crybaby . the moment u give him the glare of death it’s over. but he’s got a cute crying face which makes up for his annoying whimpering

like he made the mistake of throwing a temper tantrum in the mall only for you to glare at him with a look that said “we’re discussing this when we get home and you’re gonna get your ass beat” and walk away. immediately stopped what he was doing and he was running after u, sniffling and mumbling apologies

please humble him and have him sleep outside. the couch is too luxurious to banish him to. he made sure of it himself. it’s reclining and has charging ports. he will not learn his lesson that way

does NOT want you to get a pet or a kid or even another sugar baby/househusband - he wants to be the center of ur attention

speaking of which he HATES it when you work for too long or work overseas. when u come back he’ll pout at u and give u the petty silent treatment

don’t bother trying to comfort him he thrives off of it and he’ll keep going so u can keep paying attention to him. if u just ignore him back he’ll come crawling back to u. “WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME IGNORING YOU?? DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE???”

one time yall got into a fight and he was all like “since ur being a rude mommy i’ll just find someone else !!!” inside u were like “oh god finally” but instead u said “okay”

ohmygod he panicked. he was rlly expecting for u to fight for him,,, but he doesn’t want to admit defeat first so he tries to go thru with it but you literally dont care. even when he has his chanel luggage packed and he’s standing by the door ur just like “ok bye bitch”

So he’s trying to stand by the door and wait for u to say that ur joking. ur not.

“fine! I’m leaving now!” “okay.” “...*sniffles*” “tooru, go.” “WAAAAH NO IM SORRY I DONT WANT TO-”

u knew this was going to happen sadly. u even hid the keys to all of the sports cars u own just in case he was actually going to go thru with it

tries to get in the gossip circle with the neighborhood trophy wives but they don’t think he’s cool enough. they like u though. they think ur hot asf and oikawa doesn’t like them no more bc theyre hitting on his ATM. but thanks to that u know all the gossip and shit even though u don’t ask for it

Every time u pass by a store where he thinks he wants something he’ll just cling to u and give the puppy dog eyes. like it could be out of nowhere and u see it and you’re like “where. which store.”

bro once he went luxury he never went back. he wouldn’t EVER step foot into a grocery store ever again congrats he’s been bimbo-ified

beat him with ur gucci belt pls it’s so funny

also please please PLEASE discipline him. tell him it’s NOT okay to just randomly purchase the entire swarovski store or to throw a party at ur house just bc he’s feeling petty about u being at work for too long. ofc he’ll bitch about it but you need to be firm

but don’t worry,,,he’ll get the idea when u take away black card privileges and slap him around (lovingly)

now he has to ask permission like a good boy. he’ll kneel and hug u and give a lil pout and whine

you got a bigass man child i’m sorry maam u should’ve picked tobio or ushi

ceo!kuroo

we are: secretary

bruh keeps it mostly professional during work hours

but that all gets shedded off like a snake when we on break

one minute he’s all “get these papers done by today or i swear on all that is holy i will destroy you” and then later he’s all “hey sweetheart wanna grab a cup of coffee”

flirty flirty FLIRTY FLIRTY AAAAA HES A MENACE

but you’re less than impressed bc y’know when the time clocks out and its time to go back to work he’s ruthless once more

HUMBLE HIM FOOL only when you’re on break though

will NOT stand for anyone else in the workplace bullyin u - NO WAY. only HIM

he’s got TONS and TONS of dirt on everyone in the office - NO ONE is safe so they wouldn’t even dare

RIP janet from accounting

that dumb bitch made the mistake of insulting u to ur face and in front of him. never heard from her again

it’s not even limited to the other employees - he’s not afraid to go off on a potential business partner if they dared disrespect you

bruh tries to call u on ur off days for the most randomest shit and to get ur attention

*picks up phone* “sir?” “ah! my favorite secretary ever! listen, i need you to grab my pens from my desk at the office and bring them to my place.” “...with all due respect, it’s 2 am, sir.”

but u have to comply with his ridiculous demands cuz he’s the bank

and he depends on u completely. as much as he hates to admit it - u have his schedules, itinerary, provide coffee, performance rates, stock info, you name it.

once u were out sick and he had the worst management - he’s not used to working without you

def tries to get some of ur workload off of u bc he’s worried that the stress of working for him made u sick + he doesn’t want to go thru scheduling again

prolly gets bored in meeting rooms and sends u little smirks and wiggles his eyebrows and weird looks while he’s sitting and ur standing in the corner like bruh pay attention

maybe sometimes he’s secretly makin fun of the presenter and doodling on his spare sticky note something funny to make u crack a smile

he’ll tease u for it of course “oh, secretary! you should be paying more attention! what would you do if this was important?” bruh i can multitask now keep airdropping me ur selfies i’m saving all of them (news flash: u dont save his dumbass selfies otherwise his ego will inflate too much)

sometimes likes to pull u aside from work to hug u - you say it’s highly unprofessional but he says it’s his stress reliever

you ALMOST got caught by one of the newbies and he was kabedon-ing you

he tries to play it off (since u were embarrassed too) but u know better,,,DO NOT LET HIM FORGET ABOUT IT he turns red and embarrassed every single time USE THIS TO UR ADVANTAGE !!

never goes into an elevator without you bruh is so attached to u n holds the doors open for you

but you have to open normal doors for him if he doesn’t know how it works (hint: manual doors. “why isn’t it opening on its own?” “sir, there’s a handle.” “but?? what does it do??”)

bruh acts like a dumbass sometimes so you can baby him :/// wtf man just because you’re rich doesn’t mean i’ll- ...wait...how much did you say…? that many zeros? HAND ME THAT FORK YES I’LL FEED YOU COME HERE- HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE BITCH

brings u to overseas trips and he spoils u too

no matter how much you insist that you’re ok he gives u a lot of luxurious items. “think of it as a bonus from me.” NOW YOU JUST HAVE A COLLECTION OF NICE SHOES/BAGS/JEWELRY AND HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR THEM TO WORK IT MAKES HIM SO HAPPY UGHHHHH

BRUH just a sugar daddy at this point “you have to look presentable for the next focus group so here’s a nice rolex watch” “sir, i don’t need-” “ah ah ah - it’s my treat.”

it’s pointless to refuse him but he still teases u for it like what???? “if i didn’t know any better, secretary, i’d say you’re just doing it for my money and not my fabulous looks and personality.” “exactly.” “hey!”

yall go for drinking parties a lot. whether with the whole branch or just the two of u

KARAOKE W KUROO AFTER A LONG DAY OF WORK <333 becomes a ritual between the two of u

he’s so silly when he’s drunk lmfaoooo goofy ass mf

but that’s only when it’s the two of u. he controls his alcohol around others and his uncool side is only for u <3

also ur the only one he trusts to take him back to his place and handle him

it’s the other way around too - when u drink a lot he looks after you <333

you have a higher tolerance than him and sometimes u have competitions between the two of u on who can drink more but then yall always end up shitfaced

HES the one who has a crush on you

you know the drill - gaslight gatekeep girlboss

he’ll do anything for u but wouldn’t ever admit it he simp

offers u the keys to his estate and offers for you to LIVE with him

bruh just marry me already ok WAIT WE’RE NOT EVEN DATING YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT SIR-

he’s so awkward tryna confess to u,,,he may be this big hotshot ceo but he’s acting like a schoolgirl in love

probably prints u a confession when he asks u to go to the fax machine lmfao what a nerd

in other words ceo!kuroo is a nerd and you need to top him immediately get that bank

dog hybrid!bokuto

we are: owner

Husky-malamute breed!!! BEEG DOGGIE VERY HAPPY N DROOLY <333

OVERLY HYPER. JUMPS ON ANYONE AND U AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT

he’s well trained i swear but the moment he sees something of interest then i’m sorry you just lost him

please if a robber came in he wouldn’t even attack them he’d just tackle them w hugs

he loves loves loves snuggles <333 u busy? nope!!! hug time!!! cooking something?? oo lemme see!!! whoops look at all those tomatos on the ground. u got a deadline coming up and u really need to focus?? CUDDLE TIIIIIIME- w-wait - huh?? why are u shoving me off?? do you - do you not - huh?!?! WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME OUT OF THE ROOM?? NO!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! IDK WHAT EXAMS ARE BUT I WANT CUDDLES!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????!!!

the WORST things u could ever do to him is leave him and call him a bad boy

HE CRIES ON THE SPOT </3 HOW COULD YOU </3

soso bummed when u go out of the house without him </333 waits by the door patiently waiting for u to come back </333 sob sob

the moment he hears the door unlock he LEAPS and his tail is wagging like CRAZY

he is SO STRONG. almost always knocks u over whenever he jumps on u

destroys EVERY toy u bring him. u leave him for 5 seconds and there’s stuffing all over the floor and whatever u brought him is nonexistent

tugs on the leash when u walk so much that it SNAPS

loves romping w the other dogs in the dog park but he needs to tone down on his friendliness he almost killed a lil orange chihuahua

gets distracted by EVERYTHING. ooh, squirrel! oo, butterfly! OOO HUMAN CHILD!! MUST EAT!!!

ok while he might be friendly, he still gets super super jealous. you both were outside and u were petting the neighborhood black cat and bruh almost swallowed his head

which u thought was weird bc the two are normally friends and are pretty nice around each other

so now he’s more feisty around him and any other cat that’d get ur attention

If it was a person, then that’s another thing. He’d be very friendly at first but then slowly realize that ur attention is more directed on them than him. then he’d go ballistic

but when u scold him for practically assaulting the poor dude and call him a bad boy,,,he’s lost it

u have to lock him in the other room and he’s crying and whimpering, scratching at the door. all he wanted to do was protect u from that bad bad man who took away his owner’s attention !!!

def snarls at the dude next time he comes into ur house/apartment...dude never came back

“GRRR” “AAAA GET UR FRIGGIN DOG B-” “he don bite” YES IT DO GET UR-”

doggie bokuto rlly tries to be slick...it doesn’t work. like he tries to do that thing when he’s a total demon towards the guy but then act like an angel around u but it doesnt work bc he’s not smooth

doggie intelligence: 2 IQ. one time u got him a puzzle box and hid a treat in it but bruh couldnt figure it out just straight up monched the entire puzzle simply bc he smelled his fav bbq treat in it

speaking of intelligence - he only knows how to say a few words like ur name and incomplete sentences. speaks in barks and whines and sometimes a word

SO BIG THAT HE GRABS FOOD FROM THE TABLE WHEN YOU’RE NOT LOOKING

u had some delicious beef steak? oh dear, where did it go? there’s ur puppy kou with steak sauce all over his lips

big fan of hiking trips, sports, literally anything that involves going out

he LOVES getting dirty outside playing. boi cant control himself from rolling around in the mud

hates baths at first but then he likes how u spray the water on him and giggles awww he likes bath time now

we all know he’s not the brightest pup of the pack but,,,he’s somehow psychic. he knows when ur taking him to the vet

HE THROWS A BIG FUSS ALL THE TIME - sometimes he tries to hide but his huge tail under the couch gives it away

and he knows when ur thinking of taking him on a walk. he also begs u to take him outside by settling his head in ur lap and pouting until u give him what he wants

he likes the big ol doggie sweaters/pjs u buy him...but he always ruins them. no matter how much u buy him, they’re all ruined. he complains how scratchy it is and it feels weird on him

knows LOTS of tricks but if u teach him more than what he already knows he will forget one of them he’s like a damn pokemon

he feels ur emotions :((( if ur mood is down his tail droops :(( and he gives u cuddles and tries to make u feel better

he even likes to make a fool out of himself and be silly if it makes u laugh :((( he’s so precious

in other words i love doggy bokuto

pirate!ushijima

we are: kidnapped

ah yes we’re are captives of the most fearsome pirates of the seas: shiratorizawa

just so you know, tendou was the instigator. he was all “let’s kidnap a noble’s kid and get the ransom money!” (whether you actually are a noble or not is up to you)

thing is, nobody’s willing to pay (if you aren’t a noble) or the pirates really pissed off the folks in charge and are now doing a manhunt

so yeah you aren’t going back anytime soon

but he’s a pretty good sport about it - very hospitable

he notices the little things u like and gets them for u <333 sighs <333

he saw you reading that book? wow look at that, there’s suddenly a stack of them and the same genre he saw you reading

but you definitely shouldn’t test him. he’s SUPER scary when it comes down to it

you saw how ruthless he was with the rogues that had dared to challenge him on sea

mf made them walk the plank

you help on the ship bc u wanna be useful and also shirabu keeps being mean

he asks u to teach the crew how to read cuz theyre dumb as shit and only know water and treasure

speaking of treasure - when he leaves u on the ship to explore a cave, he gets u really pretty jewelry <33 anything u ask for

“oh, welcome back captain. how was your mission?” “i brought back a few trinkets i thought you might like.” *reveals whole chest of priceless gems* “are they to your liking? if not, we can set sail for something else that might interest you.” “I-”

bruh got a pet eagle - u ask the crew and they dont even know how tf it happened

hell, even he doesn’t know how it happened wtf. “oh. one day it flew down to me and i fed it. that’s all.” wtf

equivalent to diluc’s bird - he didn’t even give it a name so he gives u the honors

U name him rigatoni (you got a great naming sense btw)

oh my god oh my god oh my god HE TRIES TO PROTECT U WHEN PPL WERE TRYNA INVADE THE SHIP

it was the first thing he did no cap - burst into ur room and scoops u up <33333

“what the-” “we need to get you to safety. we are under attack.” and holds u close to his chest AAAHSIDHFPSDHFN OH MY LORD YES

HAS THE TEAM GIVE U SELF DEFENSE LESSONS AFTER THAT

tendou tries to give u a sword but ushi says no “she could hurt herself.”

“but ushiwaka! we can teach her not to hurt herself” “...it’s my orders.” “c’mon, be more honest, ushiwaka! what’s the real reason?”

he goes quiet then looks at u “...i’ll always be there to help. she’ll have me.” AOISHSDHFSNDF

HELPPPPP SIOJFDSKFJP HES SO CHARMING AND HE DOESNT EVEN TRY

but the rest of the crew are like “then what’s the point”

but tendou sneaks u a dagger just to be safe

sorry ur apart of the crew now - but they’re like a family even if they did kidnap u

oh whatever your life before wasn’t as cool as this (no offense)

they are given orders to protect u at all costs

speaking of which - ushi isn’t all that great w guns

almost blew his own head off tryna figure out how it works before reon snatched it from him

he brings you with him to towns and cities and he likes taking u to the markets to get you stuff

ushijima tell me your love language is gift-giving without telling me your love language is gift-giving-

he finds out you’re pretty good at bargaining and brings you onshore a lot more

is mesmerized at how you absolutely BERATE the merchant who was tryna rip you off like sis where is this violence coming from??? he loves it??

he also likes to stop by some pretty islands and imagines just settling down in such a nice place w you <333 SIGHS <333 VERY <333 LOUDLY <333

no matter how much he likes you...he will NOT let you drive the boat under any circumstances </3 its his livelihood c’mon man

whenever you have to stay on the ship while he’s away he sends rigatoni to give messages and the two of u talk thru messages

speaking of which rigatoni is fierce and can definitely sink his talons and his sharp beak into any bastard that dares get near you while the captain is away

wakatoshi “swimming is for pussies” ushijima - he’s water resistant

bruh so powerful he walks on water

second coming of christ who

IM JUST KIDDING he does swim but we hardly ever see it

legends say (tendou says) he looks rlly awkward doing it and only knows how to doggie paddle

speaking of our homeboy tendou - he loooves spooking the team (and especially you) with scary stories . don’t worry tho - this is all a ploy to get the beeg pirate husband to comfort u at night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he is ur wingman u can count on him. but his suggestions are ridiculous

“Jump off the deck and see if he’ll catch you!” um excuse me- THOU SHALT NOT PUT BIG HUSBAND TO THE TEST

he’s got good intentions...i think…

but everyone literally knows he would dive after you

in other words pirate!ushijima is a softie at heart but goddamn he probably secretly has a pet shark so dont test him or u goin overboard

mafia leader!kita

we are: associate from different group/family

kita highly respects u and yall have been acquainted since u were young with the alliance of ur families

so in a way ur childhood friends but yall do have lil bit of friendly rivalry a bit

arranged marriage whuuuutttt...yeah thats what happened but u love him <3

nobody else knows about ur arranged marriage but you two

POLITE GENTLEMAN <333 !!! HNNNNNNNN his granny raised him right even tho he’s a mafia leader

RICH BOY RICH BOY RICH BOY- ALWAYS DRESSES DASHINGLY AND SMELLS GREAT MMMMMM

he owns the majority of the underground casinos

and has lots of connections with others. countless, might i add.

you on the other hand specialize as an arms dealer so he cherishes your services the most

prob has the traditional tattoos allllll over his back and shoulders w like a dragon or sm and def a fox or kitsune

when u two were little he asked ur favorite flower and GOT THAT TATTOOED ON HIS BACK <3 probably secretly has your initials hidden in there somewhere

u both have a silent understanding of each other and he talks to u more than he does anyone

before he used to smoke but once he figured out that you didn’t like the smell of cigarettes he quit just like that

his underlings, the miya twins are so confused on how kita switches from totally brutal and ruthless to so soft around u

they can’t tease him for it, though, cuz he’d pulverize them

but they want to know more about u,,,you mysterious enigma,,,but kita would kill them if they dared asked about you

so they go to inarizaki’s most secretive informant/cyber mercenary, suna rintarou

and suna knows all about you. he saw you one time and he was curious about who you were and is now rlly scared of you because he dug too deep and you’ve got LOTS of history

he doesn’t dare tell the twins what he found no matter how much they bug him

until they bribe him at just the right price

and when aran finds out and tells kita?? ohhh boy it’s lights out for all three of them

oh my god ,,, would kill for u he loves u so much

one time you were kidnapped and held hostage

bro saw red

MAFIA ANNIHILATION SPEEDRUN ANY % NO GLITCH

he got world record time

wiped out the entire conglomerate behind it - nothing and nobody left behind after that

and of course, made sure you were safe.

yandere? ofc not...i mean...just look at him...so innocent...he would never...sharpening that knife...with splattered blood all over him...

is now joined at the hip with u,,,no matter how much you tell him you’ll be fine now and that you have tons of reliable bodyguards he won’t let it go

“don’t you have to go back to your place?” “this is my duty as both a fellow associate and your future husband.” aww,,,ur so sweet...but BRUH PLEASE GO HOME ARAN IS DOING EVERYTHING OVER THERE

makes sure to build a headquarters DIRECTLY NEXT TO YOURS so that its faster

and it’s not long until he just signs a deal to merge ur factions together (since yall getting married anyways)

and oh my god...ur underground wedding is SO SO PRETTY

absolutely DOESN’T care if he’s smuggling jewels from different countries - he’s having your ring CUSTOM MADE and the way you want it. “the diamond is too small? sure thing, darling, i’ll have it 7 times that size.”

makes sure everything is perfect in ur wedding <333 its very extravagant and even though its not really his style he’ll do anything for you

he absolutely WOULD take your last name if you wanted. FIGHT ME ON THIS

takes you to his private island for ur honeymoon so that the two of you don’t have to worry about work

meanwhile aran is scrambling around the place trying to cover for the both of you

he’s a VERY romantic husband - NEVER takes off his ring even for security. he says its practically a part of him just like you are <3

the ring has a built in tracker connected to an app. possessive? noooo...

in other words this escalated pretty quickly but i aint complaining if it gets me married to kita

--EXTRA EXTRA!! other characters’ roles!!--

officer!daichi:

karasuno squadron consists of:

cops: daichi (duh), asahi (mostly patrol, he hates confrontation), tanaka & noya (mostly accompanied by ennoshita), hinata & kageyama

investigators/detectives: sugawara, ennoshita, yamaguchi, tsukishima, kiyoko, yachi

surveillance: narita, kinoshita, tsukishima too

househusband!oikawa:

makki and mattsun are also househusbands

iwaizumi is a malewife fhasodjkasdhf-

ceo!kuroo:

lev is the newbie that walked in on u two-

janet still a bitch

kenma is his fellow ceo buddy. he also owns a multimillion dollar company and kuroo’s and his have a sort-of contract so you see him a lot in meetings

yaku is like one of the top performing managers so whenever yall have branch meetings he’s there

dog hybrid!bokuto:

kuroo is the black neighborhood cat bokuto almost murdered cough cough i did that on purpose yes i did

kenma is also another neighborhood cat. you don’t see him around that often but now that bokuto got jealous he stays far away.

hinata is the orange chihuahua i briefly mentioned

i couldn’t decide whether akaashi would stay human and be his previous owner or also be a cat/dog/owl. so lets say he’s ur human friend that is your bestie and comes over a lot. bokuto likes him, though. still gets jealous a bit.

pirate!ushijima:

tendou is practically is right hand man

the rest of the team have something to give idk how to explain pirate team members okay-

BUT BUT BUT- they do have sea rivals which are the seijoh pirates. you ran into them one day and oikawa thought you were kidnapped (you were, but you liked it there) so he tried to do you justice and failed miserably. ushijima ragdolled him into the ocean when he flirted w you.

mafia!kita:

the twins are something akin to mercenaries basically. or just plain lackeys.

suna is an informant/cyber mercenary. he gathers information about ppl which is how he knew about you. and he’s a hacker lol.

aran is his second-in-command, omimi + ginjima are his bodyguards

a/n: im going to regret posting this

#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu captains #daichi sawamura #oikawa toru #kuroo tetsuro #kita shinsuke #ushijima wakatoshi #bokuto kotaro #x reader

97 notes · View notes

lesbian4lqg · 3 years

Text

top 10 the untamed characters based on how much theyve played third wheel to wangxian

1. wen ning

this is obvious

the scene where they show up in the burial mounds and start to untie the juniors, but instead of explaining whats happening wwx just hands wn his sword and watches w lwj? all three of them were completely in synch, not a word was said, but they fucking knew anf they were having way too much fun w it

literally the whole reason he has consiousness is bc they teamed up

its aro week and i wanna take this second to say that this is a win for my ace aro wen ning & qp wn&wwx and wn&lwj agenda

three-way parenting for lsz

(god can you imagine if wq lived? theyd be too powerful)

was one of the first ppl to hear wuji outside of wwx and lwj

the boat scene????? wwx and lwj were gazing lovingly into each others eyes and wn was just. vibing. dude didnt even look that uncomfortable, just like it was another day im-

literally every scene wen ning was in after wwx came back to life tbh

2. the xuanwu of slaughter

they were literally cradling each other in their arms while an entire murder tortoise was trying to kill them

the telepathy talisman? iconic, why dont we talk about that more

life threatening battles are just hella gay by design, esp when theres swords involved. idk what to tell you

3. lan sizhui

just look at his name. lwj named him that unironically. holy shit.

the temporary parallel universe that was lwjs visit to the burial mounds? what we couldve had smh

i know lwj and wwx lovingly annoy the shit out of him post canon, bless his heart

4. nie huaisang

the bit on dafan mountain where he's like "oh fuck thats dangerous i dont want to run out of here" and wwx and lwj make eye contact and then are just like "thats rough buddy. anyway, lets do it"

"oh wow this adventure we're on is so cool" "we? this is about me and lan zhan, what the fuck are you talking about"

when they see him right after they fuck up the nie tomb and theyre lowkey just bullying him

the scene at the end where wwx confronts nhs while lwj just watches knowingly? theyre once again bullying the poor man

he gets extra points for orchestrating everythig. dude really said "oh jgy thinks he's funny? well wwx and lwj are about to be completely fucking hilarious" and then just sat back and watched shit go down w occasional commentary. king shit

5. lan xichen

when they come back to cloud recesses after mxy!wwx's reveal and theyre like "the dude whos kinda debatably the love of your life is the real evil here" and he just has to deal w that

ok it felt weird putting him this low on the list but like. he and jc were mostly emotionally third wheeling??????? like he wasnt in a ton of scenes w just him and the two of them, but he had to cope w lwjs pining all the time

6. jin ling

really should be lower on this list but he has extra points bc again, i cant believe they let lwj and wwx name things

the part where theyve p much Just been reunited and they immediately have to go break him out of the nie tombs? dude wasnt even concious but i feel like it still counts

7. jiang cheng

i feel like he shouldve been higher on this list too, but im not listing everyone and again he just doesnt have scenes w just the two of them

however he def had to deal w so much pining. the reunion on dafan mountain AND the reuinion during the sunshot campaign. the golden core reveal. the 3 months of him and lwj searching for wwx alone

8. jin guangyao

technically no scenes w just them but like. the bullshit they got up to undoubtedly lived in his brain rent free. theres no way he had any peace

honorary mention for stuff from the novel like the guanyin temple confession

10. literally everyone

these dudes are everywhere and they will make it everyone elses problem

the skywalkers of fantasy ancient china

post canon discussion conferences? the water abyss or whatever in caiyi? the sunshot campaign? the murder of the cuanwu of slaughter, which helped kick off the sunshot campaign? nightless city pt 1 AND 2? the going-ons of literally every chief cultivator? that was all them babe

honorary mentions include: lil apple, lan jingyi&ouyang zizhen, wen qing, jiang yanli, the ghosts of cangse sanren&wei changse (and prob madame lans ghost as wel tbh), su she (ty @ghostysword for reminding me- i totally forgot about him) and everyone whos seen the show

212 notes · View notes

sleeping-lilies · 3 years

Text

Title: I Get Tim a Cat Because It’s What He Deserves (oh and i guess a group chat 🙄)

a batfam/wayne family groupchat would literally never happen in canon but it would be so fucking funny you all don’t even know, so i will do it anyways.

the chat just kinda... starts. no one know where it came from. who added them. who??? none of their emotionally stunted asses would be caught dead making making a family chat tf? why can’t any of them leave? they smash their phones and then on their laptop a notification pops up like “you’ve joined ‘x’ group” and they’re stuck there. might as well use it ig, but for what???

“everyone who is alive type ‘i’” no one responds so bruce spends hours trying to find out where their bodies are until he finds out everyone just had the chat on mute

“why isn’t alfred on here” “huh. alfred isn’t on here and no one knows who made the chat?” “so whoever made it just left immediately?” “...” “lol anyways”

tim was trying to send a snap to the core four gc but accidentally sent it to the family chat and gets super embarrassed (of course this happens when everyone’s online why wouldn’t they if it makes tim’s life more difficult) and everyone makes fun of him. duke printed out copies and plastered them all over tim’s apartment while tim was out for something and tim nearly murders duke. after that no one puts the chat on mute because this was too funny.

no one actually, like, texts on a regular basis because they’re not like other families 🙄 they only text if it’s really important or someone’s dying.

that’s being said, “dick where is dog” “send doggy” “dog?” “send doggy” “dick when did you get a dog?” “SEND DOGGY” “i demand you send the dog this instant” “dog now.”

damian breaks into dick’s apartment to take a selfie with him and haley (or bitewing, haley is just shorter to type) captioned “she is mine this is a warning to all of you. i will not hesitate if any of you low lives come near her.” and dick is like “??? this is my dog i can’t have anything these days, siblings take everything, man—” oh ya, everyone reacts to the haley photo with a heart. also dick only lets this shit slide with damian, if jason the problem child pulled this shit it would be on sight lmfaooo

- tim: the dog is cute but, but in photography i learned you have to crop out everything unimportant, like this *crops out damian from the photo*

- in other news, tim joined the dead bats club and now only bruce and duke are left 😃🔪

bruce: check in if you are alive. *everyone’s status is online*

u don’t know about y’all, but my bruce wayne is a responsible father who keeps an eye on his kids, or at least does his best, “has anyone seen duke? he has school and i can’t find him” “i will find him... if you give me $50.” “i will give you the money jason just tell me where he is” jason sends a photo of himself and duke laying down on the floor eating pop tarts.

-“literally why do you all keep coming into my apartment” “our apartment, dick” “i pay for this apartment it’s mine, i keep living in blüdhaven for a reason, god, siblings always steal everything that’s your’s—” it’s ok guys dick simultaneously has eldest daughter’s syndrome and absent sibling syndrome, who is doing it like him? legend behavior. anyways, duke and jason left crumbs on the floor and dick beat them up lmao.

“can i have money” “dad” (theyre sent by same person just different text) “yes cass i will sent you as much as you need, $2,000 is enough for shipping with friends?” “dad can i have money too” “dad can i too” “may i have some too dad” “dad” “dad” fhdjdjsks they only call him dad when they’re dying, want something, or are tattling on each other, someone save him 😩

“@everyone the interviewer in the last segment asked me if we have a family chat and i have a feeling they will try to pry into my texts to see what we are texting, please actually send something so they don’t get even more nosy from our lack of communicating” *someone sends the bee movie script*

ok but like, as time goes on they get more comfy texting each other and acting like a normal(ish) family unit that texts a little more. like tattling.

“someone broke the vase in the hallway and if they don’t want me to tell pennyworth who did it they will buy alfred the cat a new scratching post by nightfall” damian is so funny i love him

“HELPPVHRNXKAK” “what’s up with jason?” “cass is sitting on him” “lol” “i think she’s gonna break his arm fhdjdksk” “ANDBSJ I HAT E YO U A LL” “when did you all come to the manor???”

“😂” bruce vs “lol” dick and cass vs “agdhsjak” tim and duke vs “hA” jason vs “i don’t find any of you funny” damian

“damian i am putting your lemon cake pop thingies in the last bottom shelf on the right, i put the code and everything in the safe” “how often does damian even come to your apartment, dick?” “whenever you’re being an asshole bruce” “he’s always an asshole dickhead 🙄” “exactly 🥰”

“dad guess what” “TIM NOOO” “remember when” “TIM TIM TIM” “you told duke to take the day shift” “I WILL NEVER POST YOUR SNAP PHOTOS TO A GROUPCHAT WITH THE ENTIRE SUPERHERO COMMUNITY AGAIN!!!” “and he agreed to if he did his school work first?” “MERCY, MERCY” “what did he do, tim” “fjdjxkskkz duke goes on school zoom meetings during patrol and pretends he doesn’t have a mic and camera and i was watching his helmet footage and it was so funny, the teachers just believe him when he pretends to have really bad network and can barely type in the chat” “my teachers never trusted me that much” “that’s because you made a kid cry once jason stfu” “wait how did u know that cass—“

“AHDBSNZKAJHF” “stfu duke” “what’s wrong with him where is he?” “cain came to visit” “ohhhh” “FHDJFJDJ HELLPPPXSND” “i know you’re taking a video, you little shit, send it” “no todd come here and take one yourself—or don’t, your presence is unwanted” “fucking brat”

“DAD DICK HIT ME” “DAD JASON’S LYING” *bruce wayne online* (he doesn’t fucking respond fhsjskla) (is it because he’s exasperated with them or crying because they called him dad even though it’s a manipulation tactic or both we’ll never know)

“everyone who is alive, type in chat” *everyone is online* then bruce edits the message to say ‘everyone who wants alfred’s cinnamon rolls, type in chat’ “i guess NO ONE wants alfred’s cinnamon rolls, how sad” and the entire chat goes wild lmfao

ok uhhh let’s do on a scale of 1-10 texts most vs is online the most

bruce: 6-texting, 5.9-online because he always makes an effort to text his kids to check up on them and when his kids are texting he will text as well here and there in the convo to interact with them because he never sees and interacts with them normally and he wants to do better 🥲. he get’s minus 0.1 because of that one time jason and dick were fighting and he logged off agdhsjnz

dick: 3-texting, 3.5-online because he’s the only one in this hellhole of a family that has an actual job (in this house we uphold gymnastics teacher grayson 🙏) and sometimes he won’t have energy to text. so. but he does make an effort when he can. he’s online more than he texts because he’s able to sneak looks at the fights when he has downtime during his job and wants to see the drama lmfaooo. also everything goes on in his fucking apartment for some reason, so now he gotta break up a (one sided) fight between cass and tim because someone has to be a responsible adult.

cass: 2-texting, 10-online because she watches more than she texts? she’s more content to watch what’s going on than to join in. also 8/10 she’s usually the one causing the drama that everyone’s texting about, like beating up the others, so she can’t text while beating them up. i mean she could, but she wants to put more energy in beating them up (lovingly) (cass is basically violence (loving)) and watching what everyone’s saying about her fights. she’s always online to catch a glimpse at the drama. also most of her texts are to dick to see bitewing. and ask for money.

jason: texting-8, online-4 because if cass is the one causing drama offline, jason’s causing drama online. jason wants to be chat cryptic but texts the most lmfaoooo. he’s antagonizing his siblings whenever he sees them and whenever he can’t, king shit. he’s online less because he deadass doesn’t care that much, he’ll read the texts later if he really wants to, otherwise either duke or tim will fill him in on the drama. (“jason ur in the chat too—“ “shut up, tim, now tell me how cass beat damian’s ass)

tim: texting-6.44444, online-10, see tim texts a lot just not to the family group chat lmfao, he has REAL FRIENDS 😤 uhh ya, that’s why he’s online all the time, cuz he’s either texting his friends or on his phone doing some shit. broke: tim stays up late working on cases, woke: tim stays up late texting his friends and playing video games over chat. tim just. interacts with his family, gets bullied by them, ya. that’s the life. also he and duke keep throwing hands because it’s the family curse to beat up tim and in this essay i will discuss how dick is the superior sibling because he never tried to kill tim—wait he probably pushed him down the stairs once nvm but it was totally justified, king

duke: texting-4, online-4 because he has, like, school. and daytime patrol. and is like a junior in high school and therefore has a fuck ton of homework. my boy has no time for family and he doesn’t want it because they’re annoying, obviously 🙄. if he wants drama he’ll go into damian’s room and get the drama. diy icon. he’s online as much as he texts but is so fast of a reader he’ll know the drama in time for the next episode of wayne family shit. most of his time online is picking fights with tim and roasting his siblings to a crisp. he’s so mean, guys, legend has it that one time duke told jason that his helmet looked like a shriveled up dildo and that it could never be the gay statement he wanted it to be jason went offline for that entire day in order to cry himself to sleep. at least he got sleep (allegedly) ayyy duke the problem solver.

damian: texting-1.5, online 2 because the only time he’s texting is to ask dick for photos of bitewing and to send photos of his pets back as proper payment. a negotiator ugghhh father like son. damian honestly doesn’t care about the drama he just wants to sketch bitewing (using the photos dick sent as reference) into the Family Portrait Sketch™️ of the rest of the Animal Family™️. it is an honor for damian to create such a piece, picasso the women hater quakes in his grave as such art that blows his dog shit “art” FAR out of the water is developing. anyways, he goes online for that and to throw random barbs at his siblings. like no one is online and damian just throws a “drake is stupid” in chat and just dips. he’s online more to text the other teen titans and jon because they’re better than his dumbass family (and he texts grayson on messenger so fhdjdjsks) true chat cryptic, jason envies him

alfred: 0-texting, 10-online. huh who said that

“duke take down the tik toks, tim is crying”

“who has my sweatshirt??? i will kill you all” “i have it jason” “nvm cass that’s your sweatshirt now i’m sorry for being presumptuous don’t aTTACK ME” fhdjdjsks

“guys i have the day off do you want to hear when delilah said to jonathon it’s so funny” “are those the kids in your gymnastics class?” “ya” “tell us everything”

the bats just... love hearing drama about those kids because they’re so dramatic. apparently alex threw a rubber ball at maya and she tackled them. wild.

time for a round of: WHO SAID IT?!?!

“how do i make my text bold like the rest of you?” —bruce, dick, cass, and jason at some point.

“how do i change my screen name? please change it back to before” -cass when tim changed her name to “hal jordon #1 stan” (“what is a stan” —bruce), (“i don’t like it either change it back” —bruce after finding out what a stan is)

“what the fuck is a pog” —jason

“fucking ‘tik tok’. we used to use vine when i was a teen. i was a front line soldier of great disasters” —dick on one hand lmfao dick is so old but on the other hand holy shit you used vine??? tell us more about the battles fought

“what is a dilf?” —bruce after scrolling through twitter

ok that’s all, my brain is gone.

“cass dick is turning purple get off him” “no. make him give me my scarf back.” “oh dad that’s terrible can you send a video as evidence?”

“GUYS I FOUND A CAT AND IT SCRATCHED ME AND IM GOING TO THE HOSPITAL BUT GUYS!!! CAT!!!” “drake send a photo of the cat immediately” lmfao bruce zooms to the hospital after that text

“GUYS THE CAT HAS AN OWNER I CANT KEEP THE CAT 🥲” “the one time you could prove to be of use and you fail, drake.” “wow tim, find a cat to steal without an owner next time” “timmy, timmy, timmy, i can’t believe you’ve messed up in finding a cat again” “again?” “again?” “again?” “when i adopt a cat i’m not showing any of you, i hate you all” (lmao hard version of guess who is who i’ll give you a hint dick cass and bruce are the confused ones. )ok it’s not hard anymore.

“dad please get me a cat 😳🐱 haha jk 🤣😩 unless 👀😏😃🙏🥰” anyways tim named the cat starry because of her fur-hair-thingy

“they just so you all know steph just crashed in my apartment and i have work in the morning” “i will pick her up in the morning” “you mean tim will, you don’t have a license, cass. anyways”

“dick do you need help moving?” “no, bruce, i think i can handle it, donna and wally are helping me anyways, but thank you” “mOVING???” “OUT OF YOUR APARTMENT???” “DICK THAT SAME APARTMENT ON 666 HELLHOLE AVENUE???” “...ya?” “NOOOOO” anyways they all break into dick’s new apartment when he moves in, walk around it, and then leave. they just... ya... damn, these bats...

anyways that’s all. see ya.

#dbsjxjjs the batkids just have an attachment to dick’s apartment #the batkids: sir thats my emotional support apartment you can’t just move #fuck you all damian is very well versed in internet culture he just chooses to not use it #dick was around in the time of VINE. YALL.#the fact that dick is the only one with like a normal job fjsjsks #he’s the only one that does his taxes too besides bruce #bruce trying his best and that’s all i will accept. i love him.#jason: wannabe cryptic vs damian: cryptic king.#cass just. beats up her brothers because she can. she deserves it too.#tim deserves nice things so i gave him a cat.#duke is so funny i love him.#he’s like “time to fuck up tim’s life again heheheh”#duke is literally 16? a teen? he’s mean by default thats it #dc comics #batfam #bruce wayne #dick grayson #cassandra cain #jason todd #tim drake #duke thomas #damian wayne #featuring those damn gymnastics kids 😩#mine

117 notes · View notes

stevesharrlngtons · 3 years

Note

this one might be too much but 😩 mutual pining between reader & Roman and it’s a formal event and someone is pissing him off and then reader comes in all dressed up and cute like “you said you would be nice ro 🙄” because theyre the date! and then he goes soft idk JKDFNF and people are like 😳 because they’re so cute together 😔

hi! i love this idea, and i hope you don’t mind if i tweak it a lil (-: enjoy!

so here’s the thing

roman is always looking for an angle

he loves a grift and a scheme and a plan

he’s always looking for a way to work smarter, not harder

and luckily, he has you to go along with them

since junior high, you had been roman’s accomplice, sometimes willingly and sometimes reluctantly

he had this annoying knack for knowing each and every one of your buttons and just how to push them to get his way and rope you into a plan of his

and of course, just fucking of course, that’s what he did this time

because you were incredibly skeptical about being set up on a date with some slimy businessman roman was trying to shmooze

in hopes of you becoming the man’s earworm for the night and getting him to invest millions in a new vaccine that the white tower was developing

“you know actual models, roman. i don’t know why you are asking me for this”

“because you are the only person i trust with this, and anything for that matter”

you were sat on his couch in his living room while roman stood above you, giving you his best pout which he knew you couldn’t resist

“you could ask letha”

“i don’t want letha, i want you” in more ways that one, he thought

“you could ask destiny, maybe she could cast a spell or read his palm to help you out,” you crossed your arms

you really didn’t want to do this, even for roman

was it because you didn’t want to go on a date with a notorious creep? yes, of course

was it also because you didn’t want to date anyone but the man who stood in front of you, who also happened to have friendzoned you at the age of fifteen? yeah, that too

but it was mostly the gross old man thing

“i don’t want models, i don’t want letha, i don’t want destiny or any little trick she can pull. i want you there, with your cunning little mind and pretty little face,” roman dropped to his knees and jutted out his bottom lip in mock sadness, “don’t make me beg, baby”

and fuck, there was that little nickname that made your stomach flip and your heart race and you can barely keep the blush from your cheeks as you reluctantly agree

and so, the plan was set

next week you were to meet with mr. daniel reynolds, a sixty something medical investor who knew more hookers than manners and wouldn’t take his hand off your ass since the moment he saw you

in which his first words were “damn! godfrey is really pulling out all the stops for me, huh?” as he gazed at you with a smarmy expression

while your skin crawled at the gesture and you had to fake giggle to cover the retch your stomach gave, you did know he was right

you looked fucking hot and it was all on roman’s dime

a contingency for you agreeing to this night was getting to take his credit card for the afternoon to buy whatever you needed for the date, price be damned

daniel picked you up in a brand new aston martin, his hand high on your thigh as he blathered on about... something, you didn’t know or care

and neither did he, truly

you were there for his to grope and stare at, he didn’t care about what you had to say

when you got to the event, all eyes were on you

you swore that people stopped their conversations to stare at you and daniel, but you didn’t know if that was just anxiety or if was true until he whispered in your ear gross

“no one can take their eyes off you, gorgeous. feels good to know you’re all mine”

and before you could reply with your now perfected canned girlish giggle, roman approached quickly

“daniel, i see you could make it.”

and immediately, just from hearing his voice, you knew this whole plan was a bust

because roman was pissed, and he was barley containing his anger

upon turning to see his face, your suspicion was proven

roman was standing to his full height, hackles raised, predatory eyes set on daniel in a straining stare, his lips pressed in a thin line as his jaw was clenched

“roman, great to see you,” daniel slaps roman on the should to which roman didn’t budge, “you already have a leg up on this investment after you sent me this peace offering,”

he patted your ass in recognition as he appreciated your body with his eyes once more

“i don’t know where you found her, but tell ‘em i don’t know if i wanna give her back!”

you just looked straight ahead at roman with a fixed smile and a look in your eyes that said i swear to god, you owe me big

“yeah, well,” roman’s voice is wound tight as he closes his eyes and takes a swift step closer to daniel, “the thing is, i’ve decided to rescind my offer. both business and personal. you don’t get to invest and you don’t get to keep her.”

“what?” daniel said, at the same time that exact thought crossed your mind

“yep,” roman popped the word from his mouth, spit coming to splatter on reynolds skin, “i don’t need your money, i don’t need you. no one does, except maybe a nursing home or an erectile dysfunction seminar”

“you little prick! who the fuck do you think you are?”

“i’m roman fucking godfrey,” roman seethes through his teeth, “who the fuck are you?”

you stood in shock as you watched daniel do the same, before roman spoke again

“that’s what i thought. now, go stand with your nose to the wall and don’t fucking bother me again,”

and sure enough, daniel’s hand went limp and fell from your butt to his side and he turned robotically on his heel and walked at a simple pace to the nearest wall to place his nose against

roman watched with an intense anger the entire time to make sure he did what he was told

“hey -- what the fuck was that?” you whispered harshly under your breath

“i changed my mind,” he growled

“since when? you practically begged for me to do this plan with you just to ruin it the second he walked in?”

roman snapped his head to look at you with that same intense gaze as before

his body followed slowly, rotating beneath him like an owl

“i am allowed to change my mind whenever the fuck i want. and i decided i had changed my mind when i saw his filthy fucking arthritis fingers on you”

“that was the plan --”

“fuck the plan! fuck. it.”

you met his stare, doing your best to match his anger, but you couldn’t

because all you could think about was how roman had seen a man touching you and hated it

because all you could think about was how fucking sexy he looked when he was mad, when he was yelling at someone and coming out on top

all you could think about was how much you wanted to beg him to touch you and kiss you and wash away daniel’s touch with his own

and roman, for his own part was thinking similar thoughts

because he really thought that this plan could work, that he could use his jealousy to his advantage, that he could harness it and use it to be a better businessman

that he could use another man as your date as a motivator to do his best to impress you and to do anything in his power to seal the deal because nothing was more motivating to roman than getting a business deal out of the way so he could have you all to himself again

but the second you walked in, looking like that, in that fucking dress, but with that fucking man? touching you? everything left roman’s mind

all he could think about was how much he wanted you, how much he needed you, how much he was the only person allowed to touch you

and how much he wanted to maim daniel reynolds, investment be damned

“i would have loved a little heads up on this. would have been nice to know you were gonna bail on the plan so i could have just blown you off,” you bit

“well, here’s your heads up for now on,” roman stepped closer, his lips only a breath away, “no more plans where any other human being touches you. no more plans where someone touches you like that, that isn’t me. no more plans where anyone thinks that you are theirs and not mine. get it?”

his voice palpated for much passion and authority your head began to spin

and your eyes widened, and your heart raced and your palms started to sweat

for a moment you swore you might faint

for another, you swore you are just going to kiss him something roman would have no objected

but all you did do was say:

“ok.”

and roman gave you a swift nod

“good. now let’s dance, i don’t want to talk business anymore. everyone here is fucking stupid and old.”

so, with his hand around your waist, roman led you to the expansive dance floor

for the rest of the night, roman’s hands help erase the memories of their predecessor. big and warm and possessive all over your body

and anytime someone looks at you for more than a passing glance, roman pulls you in tighter

he kisses your forehead and rubs his cheeks and nose to the sides of your face, like a cat marking its territory

showing everyone there what they all should fucking know

you. were. roman’s.

#roman godfrey x reader #roman godfrey imagine #stevesharrlngtonswrites

150 notes · View notes