#im gonna go do more of jefferson now

[bittwitchy]

those 40 gifs took 5 hours btw

#from capping #bc i dont have a capping program #i dont know how ppl have VLC autocap i cant get the tutorials to work #i am doing each cap frame by frame w the e > shift + s > e > shift + s repeat #frame by frame #WITH arthritis #so 5 hours is an estimate bc it took at least two hours to cap everything #at LEAST and its been 3 hours of other work #the only reason it didnt take longer is bc i have a photographic memory of TB22 its ingrained into my brain #someone tell me how to make the vlc capping thing work it hasnt yet i dont know what im doing wrong #but imagine how much faster i could crank gifs out if i knew how to autocap #kpplayer i think its called?? that does too much #adapter only works on mp4 videos that are shorter than 40 minutes #and even then it sometimes doesnt work #anyways im tired #im gonna go do more of jefferson now #i woke up and started jefferson 3000 caps was abt an hour and a half or so i think #bc i didnt have to skip back and forth between scenes its all chronological #anyways howdy. im tired #remember to rb tho bc honestly my gifsets that get less than 10 notes and most of them are likes??? really drains my brain down #like. not worth it. #esp when its chars the fandom is all 'WE NEED MORE' of like clearly no u dont #i'll delete this later i promise i just needed to complain

[pub-lius]

Hey there, it's the anon who asked about Maria Reynolds! I realized in hindsight (read: two seconds after I sent the ask lmao) that I got her mixed up with Maria Cosway, and then I realized that I don't know crap about her either. Reading past posts you seem to mostly cover stuff about Hamilton and the people surrounding him, and also Maria Cosway isn't American lol, but I hope you don't mind me at least asking anyway? Sorry for rambling it's cool if you don't answer

hey welcome back! don't worry, you're not the first nor the last person to do that lol. and don't worry! europeans are welcome here, so maria cosway is fair game for asking about. however, apologies for asking questions aren't so i hate you (jk ily <3) now i won't be able to go into as much detail because im not drawing from much of my own personal knowledge, but my internet sources will be linked!

Source: The Judgment of Korah, Dathan and Abriam by Maria Louisa Catherine Cecilia Hadfield Cosway

Maria Louisa Catherine Cecilia Hadfield Cosway was the first child of two hotel owners in Florence, Italy. As a young girl in a convent, she showed proficient artistic talent in both drawing and music. She was educated by Johann Zoffany and introduced her to other European artists.

She began painting by copying other works when she began to get recognition, allowing her to travel Italy. After her father's passing, she moved to London in 1779 and became well connected. One such connection was with Angelica Kauffman Church (not the same as Angelica Schuyler Church, though she was friends with her two) who was also a female painter.

Maria was introduced to Richard Cosway in London, and they were married in January 1781 for primarily financial reasons. The couple were within the most fashionable circles of the time. In 1786, the Cosways went to Paris where they met Thomas Jefferson. Maria and Jefferson became friends who flirted an excessive amount, and I found a really interesting article on that here.

Unfortunately, her husband was a grade-A asshole who wouldn't sell her works and stunted her artistic growth. I'm an artist, and I can tell you, a few months off can really do a lot of damage to your muscle memory and suddenly everything you put on paper looks like absolute shit, so I feel for her.

Maria had her only daughter, Louisa Paolina Angelica, in May 1790 but her health suffered afterwards. She went to Italy to recoup and returned to London in 1794. In 1796, her daughter tragically died.

Maria coped by turning to religion, Catholicism to be specifically (been there too, she just like me fr). However, on the plus side, she got her prints published by Rudolph Ackermann and made etchings of paintings at the Louvre which had been stolen during the Napoleonic Wars. She actually knew the Bonapartes personally and their patronage allowed her to open a girls' school at Lyons in 1803, which is so badass. She would later open another school for girls in Lodi in 1812.

Her husband died in 1821, and she sold his work at auction. She used some of the profit from these sales to fund her school in Lodi which is so fucking metal. She was actually made a baroness by the Austrian Emperor and Empress after they visited her school. That's also fucking metal.

She lived the rest of her life in Lodi where she died in 1838 near her school. In conclusion, Maria Cosway was more badass than I realized, and I think she's absolutely lovely. RAHHH WOMEN!!!

I hope this has helped. Again, sorry I haven't been able to go as in-depth, but I don't know Maria like that. I'm gonna give you extra sources just because I love you so much. I hope you can find a jumping off point!! European painters are always interesting, especially if they're badass, metal women who kick names and take ass, so I encourage you to do more research!!!

Sources: Maria Cosway- Royal Academy of Arts

Royal Collection Trust- Maria Cosway Collection (this has her art!!)

American Heritage- Thomas Jefferson and Maria Cosway (this was quoted in the post!)

Yale Center for British Art- Maria Cosway Was a Part of England's First Celebrity Art Couple

#history #maria cosway #maria hadfield cosway #european history #italian history #art history #women's history #18th century #1700s #1800s #19th century #thomas jefferson #angelica schuyler #angelica schuyler church #asks

[transfemarmin]

TRANS FEM MILES MORALES HCS:

a/n: if you have a problem with this harmless hc I honestly do not give a fuck “ he’s a boy!” okay nigga she’s gonna be a girl today.. if you try and start shit with me in MY comment section or MY inbox I will not hesitate to say something because the trans masc hc is received wonderfully but the transfem one isn’t, and it just shows people’s transphobia, so if you say ANYTHING, I will not only turn off anonymous comments but I will also say shit if necessary

when she first realized she was trans, she went by miley; other people assumed she just wanted her family to keep a piece of her forever, but honest she just liked miley cyrus

her name now is melody, because of her love of music, and how she was trying to love herself as a woman, she thought if she attempted to name herself that was something related to something she adored.. that she would start to feel more comfortable in her own skin.. it worked a little, the name ‘ melody’ made her happy, and it helped her with her dysphoria too

she came out to her mom first, and rio was confused, but not surprised. the kid she raised usually had girl friends, and liked to dress up in girl clothes. transgender was a new concept for rio, but she did research how to care for transgender kids, because since she didn’t understand much of it and didn’t want to be offensive.

jefferson was MAJORLY confused when he found out he had a daughter instead of what he thought, he was very open minded about it, and he was researching as well

jefferson adjusted well, he’s a normal father of a girl, doesn’t let her go outside of her dress is too short, or if she’s wearing a crop top.. if she has her jacket zipped up outside of winter time, he’s making her unzip it

“ hey…c’mere..”

he’d do that finger thing parents do when they want you to come close, melody would reluctantly come forward, standing in front of her father with a knowing look on her face,

“ you know what im gonna ask you.”

he said softly, pointing towards her zipped up jacket,

“ c’mon! dad.. im not wearing anything under here!” “ then you have no problem unzipping it.”

jefferson shrugged his shoulders, and melody sighed unzipping her jacket, showing the spaghetti strap tank top she had on under the jacket. jefferson looked over the outfit his daughter had on and gave a nod of approval,

“ keep that jacket at least halfway zipped up.”

she wasn’t gonna lie and say she enjoyed that one thing about being a girl, but it did make her smile when she got a moment to herself.. because it meant her father saw her as his daughter.

her bonnet is pink, and she absolutely loves it

she doesn’t get her eyelashes done, she lets mascara do the job, because she’d rather spend fourteen dollars.. than possibly a couple hundred for longer lashes, she does get her eyebrows threaded though

she isn’t a girl that over lines her lips when doing makeup, her lips are already full and plump so she lines them the shape they normally are, she does black or brown liner.. depends on the day.

clear and pink lipgloss are her go tos.

she felt a little embarrassed, the first few days of being trans as spiderwoman, because she’d have to correct villains when they addressed her with he/him instead of she/her… surprisingly.. a good portion of them respected her wishes and apologized

the first time she got her hair done, she had gotten butterfly locs, and it felt weird.. having her hair done.. when she was so used to her afro, and it hurt.. as she was extremely tender-headed… but she liked it, she liked it more than she originally thought she might’ve.

her favorite colors to get when she gets butterfly locs or distressed locs are normally black.. but now she adds either a few blonde highlights.. because she misses gwen.. a few pink ones.. again because she misses gwen.. or maybe red because of her spider suit.

PART 2.. COMING SOON

#miles morales x reader #miles morales #across the spider verse #spiderman x reader #pavitr x reader #miles x you #miles morales x y/n

[ediqn]

hcs for dating justin jefferson ✰ ✰

not my gif !

a/n: this is my first post/headcanon ever !! im in desperate need of tips/help, so if u have experience with writing or have advice just lmk !

warnings: none !

✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰

justin loves you with every bone in his body istg

like he never gets tired of thinking abt u, talking abt u, etc.

whenever he’s with friends or teammates and ur not around he talks abt u the whole time

“oh yea, me and y/n did that yesterday”

“me and y/n wanna go there, what y’all think abt that place?”

i also think justin is a very private person so he wouldn’t talk about u in interviews much or post u that much either

but i promise when u guys are together he loves on u so much

on the topic of that i could see justin being clingy at times

and not like all the time its more like 60/40 bc hes obviously a busy person

justin has definitely asked u to 1v1 him or have catching competitions with

and with justin being competitive (i assume) hes so determined to win even tho both of u know hes gonna win anyway

but if he ever does lose he doesnt even get mad

“i play in the nfl, this loss aint nothing to me!”

when yall go on dates most of them are pretty fun like a fair or an arcade

but once in a while yall do go on dates to like nice restaurants and stuff like that

when yall have been home all day yall definitely do wind down nights

and do night/morning routines together every night/morning

y’all take baths, do face masks, play games, etc.

and u definitely put him on with a good skincare routine.

“what you got on my face right now?”

“why is it tingly? am i allergic?”

“justin chill out, its supposed to do that.”

on the topic of night and morning i think justin is a night person

he just likes the thoughts of late night talks with you or late night drives

and when yall eventually do go to bed hes always cold

at one point he wanted to sleep with separate blankets bc he likes to wrap himself up in a blanket and pile more on top

but hes adjusted to sharing one blanket but u still both use separate ones as well

and this also makes me think he a blanket higher

and for some odd reason i think he sleeps with no pillows

like its his head on just the mattress

and for these reasons he physically cannot be a cuddler at night

but u and justin love each other so much and will definitely be together for a longgggg time

#justin jefferson #jjettas #nfl players #pls help lmk what i did wrong #i love him #send requests #justin jefferson x reader

[raphwshere]

jefferson morales, father of two. (its actually one but he doesnt know thats atm) (this is a character analysis) (its long)

so in the beginning of the movie, its clear that jefferson isnt entirely sure how to interact with miles given the way they interact, specifically in the i love you scene at visions. the drive isnt much better either but the i love you scene. he doesnt approve of miles' incredibly mild vandalism, which like, he is a cop. were gonna ignore that though cause uh, its my post. point is, in the beginning of the film, jefferson doesnt know what to do with miles at all, they love eachother but theres a rift. (this rift is likely caused in part by miles' attachment to aaron but that is for another day)

anyways, i dont have all the screenshots and even if i did, a large amount of the development im about to reference is offscreen. also theres a picture limit.

sometime after he issued the apb for spidey he probably spoke to rio, who probably wouldve helped him process enough to get to the point hes at when he shows up at the miles' dorm for his talk, which because miles was tied up ended up being more of a speech. something about aarons death made him realize that keeping his thoughts about miles and his hope for him locked up could only end badly. he spends to whole movie reaching out to miles, here is where he actually manages a genuine connection. hes just lost his brother, and for all they didnt get along near then end theyre family. jefferson doesnt want to lose miles, thats what this is about. not entirely, but enough.

more time passes, i imagine another talk with rio and some wicked introspection, then hes at the collider. he sees wilson fisk beating up the new spiderman, wilson fisk the philanthropist. throughout the movie its hammered into the audience that between all the spideys, one of the few things they all have in common is that they get back up, the characters know this to. what else is he supposed to do here but say "get up spiderman"?

when they get out of fisk tower, the first thing miles does is call jefferson, heres where i really reccomend you just rewatch the scene buti i will talk about it after this. once spidey shows up, we see that jefferson is mildly uncomfortable and unsure how to react in his presence, its not hard to understand, hes gone from thinking spiderman killed his brother to knowing that he didnt. that and the fact that he saw him save the city and probably the world first hand has the obvious potential to make one uncomfortable.

miles however, is entirely comfortable with talking to him, even going so far as to hug him, mitigating most, if not all, of jeffersons discomfort. now heres the thing, he doesnt know this spiderman, wedont even know if he new peters spiderman. miles has been spidey for a very short time and for most of it hes been wanted. but not only does jefferson allow himself to be hugged, he hugs back. of course from his end its sorta awkward, but still. heres another hug from them just cause i can.

jefferson has always wanted to support miles, we know that from his speech in the dorm, but the way he specifically finds a way to connect with miles though graffiti is different. its fairly safe to assume that part of the reason he specifically went to graffiti is because before aaron died miles did art with him. while there isnt really any evidence jefferson knew specifically what aaron and miles got up to its not a stretch really, he and aaron did graffiti when they were younger and miles is very artistically inclined. id also like to take the time to point out how palpable the relief on their faces is during the call. just cause.

idk where this came from tbh. father-son relationships are very specifically important to me. also this was not written in order but i did rewite the non analyzing parts. this wasnt even supposed to be an analysis but here we are :D im open to criticism btw :)

#into the spider verse #miles morales #i love them sm #i think if i look at this for more than five minutes i may actually break down crying #jefferson morales #jefferson davis #across the spiderverse #character analysis

[sweaterspoons]

i can't rememnber if you have a maze tag and a separate labyrinth tag but im so curious either way. what the fuck are you talking about please elaborate *kicking feet in the air twirling a phone ckrd*

GRABS YOU!!!! THANK U FOR ASKING i will now be typing for four hours<333

the labyrinth is the maze!!!!!! The Maze refers both to the play-by-post d&d campaign im running, and its setting :D

the pitch, essentially, is this:

the maze is a very little-known legend. and even if you're among the few who learn about it, it's incredibly difficult to find... and even fewer people ever make it back out.

but those who DO make it out return with their heart's greatest desire.

riches, power, immortality, knowledge, a cure for all disease, a really fucking awesome sandwich... it's all possible in the maze :)

the maze itself is its own world, with... maybe its own consciousness? it bumps up into other planes of existence every so often, and when that happens, it creates Doors, which one can enter the maze through.

the challenge, theoretically, is simple. you enter through your door. the door locks. you go find your desire. when you achieve that, you ALSO get a key! the key unlocks your door. you go home.

in practice, it's.. well... a little more complicated <3

the maze is composed of an endless series of little worlds. some parts of it are pretty classic winding tunnels, hedges, what have you. some parts of it are... cities. forests. graveyards. oceans. etc etc etc. the dream is to feel a little bit infinity train : )

geeenerally you'll get pushed in a direction that'll get you toward your goal, but. you're gonna have to work for it baby!!!

we have FOUR player characters, all from different worlds <3

the guy, played by @spookyhetero ; a warforged barbarian, a father, an all around very strange fella from a very strange world. his face is an orb. his dad is a frat boy wizard. his son is a cactus. he's friends with the maze.

mara, played by @fia-bonkginya ; a half-elf oathbreaker paladin + undying warlock!! also the love of my life honestly. they're trying to get out of their warlock pact and it's going... swell :)

nadzeya oja, played by @eldathe ; a goblin druid, my darling, my angel, my emotional punching bag. she just wants to help. she just wants to prove herself. she just wants to find-- um... who... who was it she was looking for, again? (she can't remember. why can't she remember?)

and last, but CERTAINLY not least, is doctor charles jefferson atelier, played by @electricpoolshark ; a human artificer, former army medic, current engineer and rat enthusiast. he has a giant metal rat named algernon and she's his best friend. he's just here to learn about the maze, and accidentally doomed his own ass to walk its halls forever in like... the first five minutes.

honorable npc mentions include clementine, who's been here for quite some time; titan, whom everybody hates but is also the biggest and the sexiest and is my number one committer of nonbinary wrongs; and tetsuya, who is probably not a ghost but IS a little bit haunting the narrative right now.

also.

bnuny.

:)

#okookokokok i really did type for way too damn long but i hope this was a fun read!!!!!!! thank u thank u i love infodumpin about my maze<3 #ask #maze tag #also. if u want Spoilers. i will gladly share more but it must be over dms :0c

[siriuslythatbitch]

I posted 3,175 times in 2022

That's 2,697 more posts than 2021!

140 posts created (4%)

3,035 posts reblogged (96%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@fuckboyregulus

@elder-millennial-trash

@dontbeanassbutt

@zackisontumblr

@classicdaisycalico

I tagged 265 of my posts in 2022

#sirius black - 91 posts

#remus lupin - 90 posts

#wolfstar - 87 posts

#marauders - 58 posts

#thank you for the ask! - 55 posts

#hp marauders - 51 posts

#remus x sirius - 44 posts

#marauders era - 35 posts

#my friends are so talented - 33 posts

#james potter - 28 posts

Longest Tag: 77 characters

#i came out to have a good time and i'm honestly feeling so attacked right now

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I see it's time for our semi regular 'hey minors could you fucking not' chat. So Miss B is gonna have to school you again apparently.

JUST BECAUSE YOU DONT LIKE SOMETHING DOESNT MAKE IT BAD

Read that, repeat it, internalize it, fucking live it. You do not get to dictate an authors right to write what they want. That is not your prerogative and quite frankly it's disgusting for you to do. You wouldn't pull this shit with a GoT book. You don't care about the fact that there is teenage rape in that and teen pregnancy and incest. But because these authors are 'accessable' you decide to attack them. No that's not gonna work bud.

Fun fact teenagers fuck. I fucked as a teenager and I damn well know my friends did. It's not a secret and I wish to fuck there had been someone to write a queer sex experience when I was growing up. You should be bowing down to these authors for providing you with something we never had at your age instead of trying to shame us into not writing.

Now I know it's hard for you to understand but life doesn't just end when you become a parent or turn 30. We have liked this series our entire lives. You weren't even a twinkle in your parent's eyes when this Fandom started. You do not get to claim it as yours. This is our baby. We nurtured and tended to it until it became what it is today and like fuck are you going to take it from us.

Speaking of being an adult an adult is an adult period. The age doesn't matter. You are 18 congrats you're and adult now. You're 45 or 89 or 19 it doesn't fucking matter. You are an adult. And funny thing, adults fuck other adults. That's how the world works. As long as it is consensual it's none of your concern how "adult" you think they are or aren't.

Honestly for every whiney post I see about an age gap im adding a year to the gap in my next fic between the pairing. Just fucking try me bitches. I am so done with your filtering bullshit. Fight me I promise I'll win.

29 notes - Posted August 25, 2022

#4

Send Up a Signal, I’ll Throw You a Line

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37354114

It was three on a Tuesday and Sirius was near comatose at the counter. They’d had one customer in the shop all day, a fifty-something bloke looking for a Jefferson Starship record. Once found he proceeded to lecture Sirius on classic rock for the better part of an hour. Apparently, the man thought him completely ignorant of any bands at all. Despite the fact that he was wearing an Eagles t-shirt and worked at a bloody record shop. Not that he was surprised. Every man over thirty-five came in to see a man in his mid-twenties and assumed he must know nothing but Green Day and Foo Fighters. At this point, he was used to it, but that didn’t mean it made his exasperation with it all lessen.

“How’s it going down there, Black Dog?” His uncle called down from the upstairs that doubled as the man’s apartment and employee break room. Sirius couldn’t keep from grinning at the familiar nickname. Alphard had been the one to introduce him to classic rock in the first place. When his parents had been too busy to deal with him and his brother they’d come to the record store to spend time with their uncle.

He couldn’t have been more than four when he began grabbing records from the man’s collection upstairs, choosing them by the pretty art at first. The blond man, who he later learned was his uncle’s partner Nicholas, was always all too happy to man the shop for a while as he indulged his nephew’s newfound love for the music of their youth.

Nick had always found the fact that they were all named after constellations fascinating. It was that connection and Sirius’ particular fondness for Led Zeppelin that had dubbed him Black Dog. A name that stuck well through his teens and into adulthood. Black Dog was as much his name as Sirius at this point. It never failed to make him smile.

“I’ve seen legislation passed faster.” He groaned. The other man laughed at his joke. It was well known that their family had a distaste for both his and his Uncle’s career choices. Blacks were known for going into politics or becoming solicitors at the very least. His mother, father, and brother were all involved with it in one way or another. Fortunately, the idea of having a son without a uni degree compelled his parents to pay for it regardless.

Sirius didn’t regret his choice in the slightest. Music had always been his passion, and one his uncle had always indulged. Alphard was peering at him from the stairs. He’d moved just low enough to keep him in his line of sight.

“Nick is whipping up a batch of cinnamon scones now. I’ll bring you a few when they’re done.” In his younger years, his partner had been the pastry chef at multiple Michelin star restaurants. They often benefited from his penchant for baking when bored.

“Life may be worth living,” Sirius responded, completely missing the tinkling of the bell from the front of the shop. His uncle hadn’t. A sly smile crossed his face as he glanced across the room. Eyes flicking back to his nephew he replied.

“Perhaps there’ll be another soon enough.” The man winked, familiar grey eyes shining with mischief before disappearing back upstairs.

“Wha?” He tried to ask, shaking his head at his uncle before turning back to the store.

Sirius wasn’t sure what he might have expected to find when he glanced across the space, but this wasn’t it. A man in a dark brown cardigan had his back to him. His hair hung in sandy brown half curls that looked soft in the warm light. Even from across the store he could tell the man was a virtual giant. Sure, Sirius was shorter than your average bloke, a fact his best friend James loved reminding him of, but this man had to be well over six foot tall. He wanted to get a closer look though. It took him far too long to remember he worked at the bloody store and had every reason to approach the man.

“So… Do you come here often?” Sirius said, mentally berating himself for the cliché pickup line.

“Uh no, actually.” The other man laughed. His head was still downturned, long tan fingers rifling through the albums in the centre rack. The dexterity with which he did so did very unfortunate things to Sirius. Especially since he was at work, in the record shop, where his uncle was currently upstairs and well within earshot. “I had a friend tell me about this place, and I thought I’d check it out.” Finally, the man turned to glance at him. Sirius’ eyes went wide at the sight.

His lips were plush and a deep pink, one corner cocked up in amusement. His nose was almost button and utterly too adorable for Sirius’ good. The silvery band of a scar that ran across it just added to the urge to know this man inside and out. It was his eyes that were the real knockout. They were a shade of dark green, the kind of green that reminded him of warm summers spent in the countryside or his favourite jumper. He couldn’t be sure, but he thought he saw flecks of gold or perhaps amber filtering through them. It was as if they glowed in the light and Sirius was desperate to lean in and examine them closer. Swallowing hard he attempted to cover his instant attraction to this man.

“Is there something I can help you find?” Sirius could tell his voice was a bit strained. Fortunately, the other man didn’t seem to notice, or perhaps he didn’t care. Sure, he had no doubts that he was attractive, but there was no guarantee this guy was into blokes. He prayed to deities he had never been certain existed, that he was though.

“Yeah, actually.” Fuck. He’d been so distracted by the man’s appearance that he hadn’t really registered his voice. It was a smooth baritone that flooded his senses in the way that Alphard’s records had when he was a child.”I was looking for a Steve Miller Band record.” He had the faintest Welsh accent, the vowels leaving his tongue like music. Sirius was reminded of a much fitter Tom Jones.

“Oh, yeah, no, you’re in the completely wrong place for that.” He said, whipping around and making his way deeper into the store. “That’s where we keep all of the newer albums, anything from the naughties onwards.”

“Ah, well that would make sense.” He laughed behind him. The sound sent shivers up his spine, and he was glad he could play it off while walking.

“This is the section you want.” Sirius came to a stop in front of an enormous back wall. There were framed and signed classic rock records hung above a multi-tiered record holder. It ran from the staircase to the wall, wrapping around toward the counter. They truly did have the best collection in all of London, a fact his Uncle, and okay maybe Sirius too, was proud of.

“Woah.” The man’s eyes went huge as he took the setup in. “That’s quite the inventory you have here.”

“This isn’t even all of them.” Sirius laughed, thinking of the storage room where they kept the particularly expensive records. It took Sirius by surprise when the other man smiled at him. Not the half-smirk before, but an actual grin. His abdomen fluttered in a way he decidedly was not letting happen. Instead, he did his actual job “So do you want a specific album, or..?”

“Oh, yeah, sure.” He could have sworn he’d seen a slight flush to the man’s cheeks, but put that down to wishful thinking. “I was hoping you’d have a copy of “The Joker”.”

“I know we have at least one copy, but my uncle stocked it so we may have to dig for a bit.” Sirius fought a smile at having an excuse to spend more time with the mystery man. “You take that line, and I’ll look through this one.”

“Sounds like a plan.” He put on a jokingly solemn expression that had Sirius laughing despite himself. The other man let out an amused huff but turned toward his stack of records.

Unfortunately, or if he was honest with himself, which he steadfastly attempted never to be, quite fortunately, the two lines of records were quite close together. It was great for someone browsing alone. For two, however, it was close quarters. The cardigan covered arm of the other man brushed lightly against his bare one. At first, he’d assumed it was an accident, but then it happened again, this time staying in contact in some way. He bit his lip trying to keep his focus on the records and not the slide of the other man’s arm against his. Even through the garment, he could feel the radiating body heat and Sirius wanted to roll around in it like the dog his uncles had nicknamed him. This close he could smell the woodsy scent rolling off him. There was a faint hint of books, but the exceptionally old kind his parents had kept in the library of his childhood home. Somehow for once, the reminder didn’t make him want to bolt for the nearest exit. Contrarily, it made him want to press as close as possible, to claim the smell as his own. Christ, maybe he was a dog.

Sirius concentrated on the records instead, flicking past the Sex Pistols, The Smiths, and Stereophonics. At least he was at the st’s.

See the full post

34 notes - Posted February 24, 2022

#3

Wolfstar

Accidentally married

Intimate Artistry  

You spoil me so, Marigoals! I'll make this EXTRA special for you, babby<3

Remus opens up a tattoo parlor in Diagon Alley. He's done some research on basic charming for the designs, but has some he doesn't want to try out on his regular clients just incase. Sirius loves being his tester, which has resulted in quite a few tattoos (That Remus would love to trace with his fingers, tongue, and well anything Sirius would let him really). It's great, but it also means he's running out of room. Remus has come across some odd runes that he is pretty sure are meant to make the tattoo guaranteed not to fade, but he's not positive. Sirius decides he wants a wolf and dog baying at the moon on his hip, which means he has to take off his pants and use towel to try and cover. There's a lot of fumbling trying to keep from touching Sirius' cock, which just so happens to be making itself more obvious with each touch of the needle. (What can I say, he's a masochist and it's Remus afterall.) Both men are panting by the time he finally finishes tracing the last rune in invisible ink, but it doesn't have the effect either thought. A quick burst of pain has him gripping his own hip, working down his bottoms just enough to see the top of the very same tattoo he's just inlaid in Sirius' pale skin. Sirius, who has always been better at runes than Remus looks over the book and realizes the tattoo wasn't bound to his skin permanently but bound them to each other. And well, was that really so bad?

36 notes - Posted February 26, 2022

#2

Innocent Physical Contact and I Didn’t Mean to Turn You On Perciver (Percy Weasley/Oliver Wood)

Ooookay. First time thinking about this ship, but I'm excited so let's go. It's their 5th or 6th year and they've been the only two sharing their dorm just them since their first year, but things have gotten tense. Percy has tried to stay out of the dorm as much as possible and Oliver can't figure out why. He comes back from quidditch practice one day early because there was some issue or another and surprises Percy who had memorized his schedule. Percy has gay panic and makes to leave but Oliver stops him in the doorway with his hand on his chest. He demands that Percy tell him what's going on and after some very intense yelling Percy finally admits that he's pretty sure that he has a crush on him and the sight of him in that Quidditch uniform does things to him. Oliver definitely didn't think about what his uniform might do, but is very pleased with this revelation so takes it as a win and just kisses him. There's delightful frottage, Percy makes him keep the uniform on while he blows him (Because it's hot that's why) and it's just a lovely smutty time.

50 notes - Posted February 27, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Okay we're gonna have a fun time today because I am fucking enraged. It's clear that people have no clue what polyamory actually is or how a HEALTHY poly relationship works. I'm not just talking a triad, because outside of fiction those are fairly rare. Since apparently the cishets control the narrative I think it's about time I cleared some shit up. The key to polyamory is communication. THAT DOES NOT MEAN CHEATING AND SAYING IT'S FINE BECAUSE "Hey I'm poly"! There's a certain fic that tries to excuse this behavior and honestly I'm disgusted that it's so fucking glorified. That is NOT polyamory. That is cheating, plain and simple. If you want to write that that's fine, but call a spade a fucking spade. Don't you dare use a healthy and valid relationship choice to excuse your character's bad choices.

As a member of the queer community you should fucking know better. You wouldn't say being Bi or Pan is a reason to allow cheating, and if you would get the fuck out. I am tired of putting up with bi and pan phobia in the queer community. The hets fuck us over enough as it is, why the hell would you add to it?

I am polyamorous. I am in healthy and consenting relationships. I am fucking valid and am not a cheater or greedy or any of the bullshit that you all seem to perpetrate. I am so fucking done with you using my life as an excuse for your shitty writing. Don't pit partners against each other, don't make them keep from working out their normal feelings so it's healthy, and for fuckssake DON'T TRY AND COVER INFIDELITY WITH POLYAMORY!

Have a fan-fucking-tastic day, and think about what you say before you say it next time.

81 notes - Posted September 11, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[lockedtowers]

im supposed to be getting ready for work so heres some run ons

aka brina rambles, also this is not rebloggable for a reason. this is shit ive worked on for ages. across blogs i have deleted and everything. i dont want random ppl rbing it without permission and taking info and i want it set up so if the info is taken it can still be traced back here. esp with how long ive been deciding on names for those courts lmao. they’re not the most ingenius or anything but i still put work into it yknow.

so anyways basically cassies bio dad vas is ofc a full blood fae, and a hybrid of the two main ‘courts’ by wonderland standards bc ofc im going with the basis that is shown both in syfy canon and ouat canon of wonderland denizens have a very different physiology to other realms, Jefferson in ouat remembered everything in his original life and just had the new memories shoved into his head too which drove him upending, i write that into cassie she has her old memories because of her physiology but the new memories didnt really settle in her head at all, so she only has vague understanding of it all. her twin brother has all his old memories but he also has the new ones so he very much so leans into the ‘im gonna fuck around and see what happens cause this is great’ bc hes a clown, but anyways. and yes i play it as jefferson is from wonderland, i write my jeffy on my sideblog, i also write grace, ima do what i want, but abc kept going back and forth with it, they mention his home in ouatiw but then in ouat they imply hes not from there so they didnt give a shit either, i can do what i want

but again main point, there’s no reason why other realms faeries would have the same physiology as wonderland faeries would, and ive played it into threads too before, the general descriptions of cheshire cats generally lean heavily faerie like, cassie is the cheshire while her twin brother is the dormouse, in syfy verse those are more titles than actual being. but shes a faerie she has an animal transformation which makes that also an actual being, and while her title is generally just ‘cat’ to most people, she is aligned with and technically a cheshire cat, she has the grin they associate with cheshires and she often times acts as a sort of guide, but also a very annoying pot stirrer in multiple ways, and a main thing that i play on a lot is how she guides ‘oysters’ aka humans to hatter, which is something people dont bring up a lot. in aaiw the cheshire cat is essentially toying with alice and leading her on to where she should go, and while alice is following the rabbit, the cat is manipulating the system in its own way as well. im actually gonna go buy another crappy edition of aaiw just so i can annoyingly tab it and stuff and im debating a cruddy paper one or a good hardcover— anyways

so like obviously creative liberties here, faeries arent really canon to wonderland at all but like fair folk magical aspects are still present, like the pig turning into a baby and shit, all the wildcarding that happens. creative liberties, its free media now to do whatever the fuck you want. i know many people hate adaptions and im sorry they hate fun im gonna do what i want.

now most commonly people separate fae by seelie and unseelie, or ‘good and bad’ faeries is often how they describe seelie and unseelie. and whilst im sort of doing similar (but giving them new names bc again, wonderland is not the human land, theres no reason that they have to have the same names) im also adding to it, adapting it, etc etc. Even in the separate courts, there are subtypes, but the royal families of each court would have at least a basic gift with all the powers of the subtypes, which is essentially why they’re the ‘royal family’ despite their own powers being so much weaker than an individual only showcasing one subtype of magic. more equals greater, despite the obvious issues with that, more or less.

The two ‘courts’ or ‘good and bad’ as the ‘good’ would have one believe, the current names i have going for them would essentially be translated to Deyreins, the ‘good’, and Bludveils, the ‘bad’ (i still have to fix the spelling on my bios on the sideblog tho lol). Bludveils centuries ago were cursed by the Deyreins to an eternal binding of honesty, which means they have to be truthful in words, but they can use twist the truth through twisting and confusing tales, purposefully manipulating it to sound like something else while theyre still being truthful, and basically just using loopholes to get their way. And the results of that curse is used against them to frame them as massively villainous, cruel, and evil creatures. What the Deyreins did not count on was the Queen of Hearts using this to further her own gain, and villainizing both sides as a way to essentially wipe them out from the face of Wonderland. Those that are left on Wonderlands main plane hide their species, and the rest had to escape to an astral plane to protect themselves from her.

But a large portion already had to escape because of Cassie’s father. Most will only recognize him by one of two names, the White Knight who destroyed the house of black and gave reign to the Reds and Whites, or as the monster, the creature of everyones darkest fears, the creature accused of slaughtering villages for fun and embarking on chaotic destruction for the thrill, The Jabberwock. By all accounts, he is both. His animal transformation is the monster itself and he was always the one taking the head, but never the one given the crown. Which is ironic given his existence is due to a romantic tryst between a noble of the Deyrein court and a royal of the Bludveil court. The twins didn’t get equal parts of the bloodlines the way he did, Cassandra inherited a lot more Bludveil than Deyrein, the curse affects her too, but Mason got almost nothing from it. It’s recessive in his body, but the curse doesn’t act on him. he has nothing to worry about, she does.

They’re only have fae though, the other half is Witch, their mother is the Queen of Spades and an extremely powerful sorceress, and trysts like that are not meant to happen according to the Deyrein courts, they are not supposed to exist. they’re essentially not allowed to because that threatens the order the deyreins built for themselves centuries ago and regularly slaughter bludveils for trying to fight against. no matter which way its sliced or diced, they’re in danger from just about every single point. if their family bloodlines got out, from the hearts for threatening the fact they stole the crown from the rightful heirs, from the deyrein fae for threatening their control over the other plane because its proof they can coexist in ways other than treaties and threats and submission.

and ofc jack is just a bitch whos mad cassie didnt bend the knee to him, is obsessed with her anyways due to her fae magic, and doesnt want his crown threatened that he never earned in the first place. he’ll say otherwise like ph i played my mother and i worked for the resistance, bitch you stole that land you stole that crown get fucked, anyways.

thats all my rambles on that bc funnily enough this was supposed to be about what blood does to cassie lol and i never got there.

#i tried to rewrite it but i can’t | canon #across blogs ive hinted at this for like four years i think now??? just never put it into words #this was in thread hints even before i changed cassies backstory to make her the cat #:) #out. #i want ppl to be able to join in my bullshit but indont want people to steal my bullshit #esp since i didnt have the time to slash words so they woukdbt show up in tags #my headcanons. mine. and my actual canons. still mine #stuff thats not mine idc but stuff i put together and worked for i do care #murder cw #mass murder cw #uhhh idk what else to put

[commanderquinn]

Good Space Chapter 3: Hey Gringo

! i dont! keep these posts! updated! like i do! ao3!

that means you're going to find typos and shit (and possibly minor detail changes) that don't match the ao3 version! that's because im not going to bother fixing the tumblr posts until i finish good space as a whole. im only uploading them here as a backup tbh

—

master list / ao3 chapter link

—

warnings: ayyy!! none this time!! unless you wanna count Highly Disrespectful Thoughts ❤️ tho!!! the flashbacks are shuri, heads up for anyone who is a big baby (like me) and still crying over WF. also (shocker) bucko angst/panic attacks

song: it KALEO time!! istg there are golden oldies and hippie classics on this intended playlist, we just havent gotten to them yet. this choice is mega self-indulgent on my end ngl, buuuuut thats the whole fic in general lbr (side note: every time i write Angy Ava, i want you to imagine the vocal intensity of jefferson airplane’s lead singer, grace slick)

the timing of this chapter could NOT have been better with the probably-russian hackers knocking out ao3 that long. i mean it dude, im pretty sure the universe had a good chuckle over this one bc i sure as shit had to sit here and go “youre pullin my leg bud”

also now feels like a good time to mention, for absolutely no reason in particular (definitely not bc of Bucky being a Huge Simp this chapter), that i hc bucky as a dom with service top leanings. i just didnt wanna give the impression that reader is dom for this and accidentally get anyones hopes up with no payoff. i try to avoid that as much as i can bc god knows i drop Big Honkers on y’all every damn chapter, id hate for you to get all the way to the end of this and not get your cookie, y’know? (i am, ofc, down to write mega sub bucky for smut-shot requests)

also remember when i mentioned giving ava a HANDFUL of physical details for writing fuel? 🌝 (ur gonna think im funny rlly soon, dw)

anyways if you dont have adhd, good luck and god speed with the idiots thinkin abt each other in this chapter ❤️ im so sorry in advance 🥺😔

—

Febuary 17th, 2015

"Good morning, Sh—"

"Have you left your worthless husband yet?" Shuri impatiently taps a finger against her elbow, where her arms are crossed over her chest. 

She watches Ava sigh on the other end of the vidcall. The woman looks too tired. She needs rest. Shuri wants to stab Alec all over again. She's going to make a new, self-lacing, possibly electrified dagger just for the occasion. "I know you're just trying to—"

"We can come to get you. I will send T'Challa. You must promise me that you will have him get me something from Washington." Shuri raises a stern finger, pointing it directly at the camera. "Do not let him pick it out himself—"

"Shuri, honey, I love you with all my heart, but please—"

"I want you to pick it. The furniture in your office is ridiculous; I want something like that."

A smile far too small pulls at the corners of Ava's lips. Her smile used to move freely, and it will do so again if Shuri has any say in the matter. Which she does. "Well, thank you, I work very hard to keep it ridiculous. Now—"

"It will make me think of you whenever you are not around to make fun of my brother with me. My mother will get the lawyers you need to start your divorce—"

"I—sweetheart, please, it's been a very long night—"

"It is the afternoon where you are. You have not even had breakfast, have you? Of course not. You are busy doing the work while Alec—"

"Shuri!" Ava puts a hand over her eyes and takes an unsteady breath in. "I'm sorry. This is—it's been a long night. I didn't mean to yell at you—"

"You need to start yelling much more, Ava. Aim it at your worthless husband while you tell him you are leaving," Shuri argues, entirely fed up with how the doctor allows the spineless dickhead to make her miserable. "T'challa will remove him for you while you stay here with us."

Alec—she refuses to call him Ryder; the man does not deserve to have taken the doctor's name—leans into the camera view, his expression bored. Dismissive. Shuri wants to smash his wrinkling, greasy face in with her fist. "While I appreciate the offer, your majesty, my wife and I can handle our private life alone."

Shuri glares back at him, one of her eyebrows hiked as far up as she can comfortably get it. "Do you really think being aware of your presence on this call will deter me from reminding my friend that you are a demon?" She looks pointedly at Ava, who's still covering her eyes. "He is a demon. A pasty, rude demon."

"Alec is going to shut the fuck up now, I promise." The fingers over Ava's eyes pull in until she's pinching the bridge of her nose tightly. She looks as if she's fighting off a migraine. She probably is. And it is Alec's fault. "That way, we can get this over with, and I can finally get some sleep—"

"Which you need and are not getting enough of." The words slip out before Shuri can stop them. 

Ava's shoulders deflate slightly. Her hand drops, and she attempts another smile that doesn't reach her eyes, making Shuri feel a pang of guilt. "No, I'm not. But I will, just as soon as we finish the basic adaptation matrix. I promise."

Ava always encourages her to speak her mind, no matter what. Sometimes it gets her into trouble. She is not looking to berate her favorite Canadian; she loves leaving the vidcomm between their labs on. The open connection is a comforting window into the outside, one that lets Shrui indulge in any question or raving that passes through her mind. 

Alec is a poison in her friend's life, and Shuri will not back down from reminding her of that. But mother and Nakia have sat with her over this, explaining that sometimes, an abused heart will cling to what hurts it. They have to be supportive while Ava works through this. She's getting there. Just not nearly fast enough for Shuri's patience.

Father has been reminding them all that Alec is a risk, given what he knows. Trusting Ava means trusting her for the duration, and they can't go back now. If she says she is handling the issue of separating the man from her work, they have to allow her room to do that. But T'Challa has been ordered to keep close, or at the very least, ready to go.

As much as she despises Alec, Shuri does not wish to see Ava hurt in this. Not any more than necessary. She is also not interested in trying to control her friend the way her mother sometimes tries to control her. It is infuriating. 

So, taking a deep breath and squaring her shoulders, she lets some of the fight leave her. For the sake of Ava, not the pasty demon. "I have the latest build ready for transfer." 

"You're sure you've secured the connection on your end?" Alec has the audacity to question, even outside of the frame. "I'm not interested in spending my week chasing traces of this—"

"Do I look as if I will hesitate to strike you, colonizer?!"

—

"I'm just saying, Humpty Dumpty."

"Fuck off," Bucky wheezes at the billionaire, compressing the towel he grabbed from his new medkit against his ribs. Why he expected to make it through his first mission back without having to crack it open, he's not entirely sure now that he's sitting in the hindsight. Getting shot today was, if he's honest with himself, entirely predictable. It's his luck, after all. 

"We let you out of the house again for five minutes, and you've already broken yourself." Tony shakes his head as he tsk's, making Bucky roll his eyes lazily. "What's Ryder going to think? If you keep this up, you'll give the woman a complex about draining your mojo."

"She's going to think I throw myself in front of armor-piercing rounds for idiots that don't notice when they're being shot at." The mention of Ava brings the doctor's smiling face to the forefront of his mind. Bucky leans back against the Quinjet's co-pilot seat, letting his eyes fall closed. 

He could take care of this latest injury himself. That's what he usually does. Thanks to the serum, all he has to do is keep the wound clean for a few hours while his body stitches itself back together. Nothing's broken, and he'd be in much more pain if anything were punctured. Hell, he'd probably be dead already. The fix for this is so easy it'll practically handle itself.

"You always get so cranky after you've played the hero." He hears Tony kick his feet up on the Quinjet's main controls. "Take a breather. Maybe a bow or two. Believe it or not, it's possible to accept a compliment now and then."

"Grandstand more often, got it."

Ava's probably going to hear about today's incident now that Bucky thinks about it. If anything, Steve's going to make sure of it. He doubts she'd guilt him for not being comfortable with an optional trip to medical. They've been having more conversations about boundaries and comfort, and she's been unwaveringly supportive of him moving at his own pace. 

"You don't have to grandstand, you gigantic baby," Natasha chides from between the chairs. Her hand smacks against his shoulder, making Bucky grunt softly. "A whole new world is going to open up for you when you relearn to accept praise."

Tony snorts, long and loud. "Has he reached that stage of modern education yet?"

"I reached that stage of education before you were born, Stark." Bucky's not territorial over his reputation anymore; those days are long since passed. The grand majority of his mojo got left in the 40s. He's just tired of Tony's shit. That's all it is.

He shifts uncomfortably in his seat. Ava might feel bad that he didn't come to her for something like this. He doesn't... want that. He doesn't want her thinking that he doesn't welcome her help or that he doesn't trust it. He... he does. He doesn't just appreciate having the option; he enjoys it. The new routine is a breeze, and his neck feels better than it ever has. At least that he can remember.

"I'm confused," Tony mumbles around a mouthful of snacks. The man never stops eating. "Are we talking about your no-no years, or did you and Rogers hit up underground bars before Germany?"

"I know all his secrets from the vanilla days; they never went to any of the fun ones," Natasha confirms. It's not like Bucky was going to take the verbal bait anyways. Steve still falls for it regularly. 

"I like how you don't deny having the rest of the answer; I feel like it tells me all I can tolerate about the icicles when it comes to this. That's my favorite part about you, Romanoff. You know when I don't need to know, you know?"

His dumbass friends might as well be background noise with Bucky's mind this firmly in the memory of Ava's office. She's been so good to him, especially over this last week while she pushed through all the red tape for him. He'd been expecting it to take an eternity of hounding Steve all by his lonesome, but she got him back in the field in under two weeks. His best friend had actually been kind of pissy about it behind closed doors. For Bucky, it was like getting sprinkles on top of his cake. 

He's been thinking about getting flowers delivered to her lab for the trouble. It feels like too much whenever his thumb hovers over the confirmation button. He's reached the part of staring at the order details four times.

"I'm pretty sure your country doesn't appreciate it as much as you do. They tend to fight cold wars over it."

"Well, yeah, but our country—you see what I did there? That was a pretty funny communism joke. And it works as a reminder for both of us that you're actually an American citizen these days; isn't that wild? Back to the point here, our country fights wars over stuff we do ourselves all the time, so that doesn't feel like a fair reason to dismiss our friendship."

The doctor's forcing him to expand his music library. Her taste there is as scattered as her taste in movies, but she's got some leading themes he's been able to pin down. The 60s and 70s are huge for her, expectedly, and she's got a lot of nostalgia over the 90s. Paige keeps her versed in all things pop, folk, and country, according to her. 

"If I start referring to the US as my country, you people will expect me to do things like register to vote. Or put up wallpaper."

"I don't think anyone's expecting you to be legally allowed to do that. The voting thing, not the wallpaper. In most states. For multiple reasons. Although, the wallpaper might be a good call."

Ava invited him to their absurdly large archive of playlists during his second session. The ones Paige curates are nothing but insanity. Not one of them makes a lick of sense. Bucky decided that he should have expected that, given her Energizer Bunny reputation. Ava's are less scattered; more organized. Soothing for his mind to digest. He's been using them as workout music ever since. And driving music. And general background noise. 

"I don't think I'd know where to start buying wallpaper. Do you even want me putting that shit on your expensive building?"

"Not really, but the idea of walking in on you rolling paste on the living room walls is worth anything it could take to fix them later."

God, she's funny, too. He could listen to the woman's awful, soul-crushing puns and subsequent cackling for hours. He'll never say that to her face, not for as long as he lives, but they've made him feel lighter every morning that he's gone to let her work him over. He's already stolen two of them to torture Sam with. Another thing he's not going to tell her.

"Maybe I should start smaller. Bruce keeps suggesting a car that has legal registration."

"Heeey, that could work. You'll be signing up for mailing lists and bitching about state tax in no time. You know what?" He hears Tony snap his fingers. "We should get you a houseplant. Work you up to having a fish or something."

Alright. Maybe he'll go to Ava. He doesn't want her to think he's trying to blow off her expertise again. Or that he's avoiding her. He's not; he really does like hanging out in her office. Even if it's technically a medical appointment. He's a lot more eager to visit her than his therapists, that's for sure.

"I am not paying taxes," Natasha scoffs. "If you think I'm tying a legal address to my name, you're out of your fucking mind. Moreso than usual."

"You don't think you'd enjoy having a cave to lurk in?"

"What makes you think I don't have one already?"

"I'm talking about a real house, not a safe house."

This injury isn't related to his cybernetics. It's his ribs, well below any of his implants. He's not entirely out of the loop when it comes to what doctors have to do to get their licenses. She no doubt had to pull a lot of hard hours during her residency. Maybe she doesn't want to patch up the tower's notorious grouch every time he takes a hit. But he doubts she'd ever be impolite enough to refuse him walking in.

"I have my space here: bathroom, laundry room, small kitchen. If I haven't bothered decorating that, what makes you think I'll want to do it for an entire house?"

"Aww, come on. Look at Ryder! She's having all kinds of fun making her place as obnoxious as possible. That could be you after a few online shopping sprees."

Bucky's eyes open slowly, his brows drawing in when the second verbal mention of Ava pulls parts of his attention back to the conversation. 

Fuck, not going to medical still leaves the option of her taking offense. Okay. Alright. So, he'll split the difference and go to emergency intake. He's pretty sure she's listed as his surgical contact in the tower now—he can't stomach looking at his own medical file, not even the written records. Any injury this big will get flagged for trauma support, and she'll be notified. Then it's up to her what she wants to do. That feels like a good compromise.

"She's doing that to reclaim it from Alec; that's different. I don't have the same motivation. For me, it's just going to be extra work.

"Who's Alec?" Bucky asks without thinking. If the universe doesn't hate him today, Natasha's just going to assume he's being his usual kind of paranoid.

"She hasn't mentioned him?" Tony sounds surprised. "Alec's her ex-husband."

Ex-husband? She was married? And she's not anymore, meaning she might be—

He shuts down that train of thought immediately. 

Reclaiming the space of her house implies they lived in it long enough to form some heavy memories. She hasn't mentioned having a kid, and she strikes him as the type to bring up something like that pretty fast. So it was just the two of them, most likely.

"People usually don't like talking about the egocentric sack of shit they used to coexist with," Natasha points out. Of course, she already knows about the doctor's history. It's her.

"Bad divorce?" he prods, trying not to sound overly invested in the answer. These assholes will take it as an invitation.

"Oh, the worst," Tony confirms. "Shithead tried fighting her on it tooth and nail. She had to borrow my legal team just to get the guy to fuck off and leave her alone. He even kept her surname after the divorce; can you believe that?"

An uneasy feeling starts to rise in his gut, making Bucky look over at him. Then up at Natasha. "What kind of won't leave her alone are we talking about?"

"Down, fido, my lawyers took care of it. There's no need to start tailing him. Aside from being a self-absorbed asshole that insists they'll," Tony's voice turns scornful as his fingers form air quotes, "work things out with time, he's toothless." 

"She's got concealed carry permits she earned properly if that makes you feel better," Natasha offers up. The thought does help ease the tension building in him. 

He won't read Ava's file, no matter how bad the buzzing gets. But he might check in with JARVIS about her home security. He's noticed her name on the system logs. She, or at least her house, is linked to SHIELD's network despite her general distrust of the organization. He understands the opposing priorities completely.

He caved and read Wyatt's file two nights ago. The buzzing had been building since Ava mentioned him wanting an autograph, and it finally got to be too much. Nothing's lurking there aside from an impressive list of historians from all the fuck over Georgia and Alabama. The kid's got more family than some towns have population. 

Bucky leans forward with a muted groan to change the autopilot's intended LZ of the Avenger's balcony to the entrance hanger for medical. If he's going to grit his teeth through the antiseptic over a couple small holes, he's damn sure not going to haul his ass through half the tower while his ribs leak. His patience has limits, and that's pretty fucking far over the starting line. 

Tony looks over at him with a deep, suspicious frown. Bucky frowns at him right back with the same level of scrutiny. He can feel Natasha staring a hole into the side of his head, even if he can't catch her in his peripherals. He hates both of them with a passion at the moment. He knows what's about to happen—

"Did you just… prioritize your own health," Tony questions like he's baffled by the very idea. His whole upper body turns in the seat as he looks up at Natasha excitedly. "Oh my god. He's doing it. All by himself." He raises a hand to his chest and looks back at Bucky. "They grow up so fast."

It's good that the autopilot is on. If it weren't, Bucky would be tempted to crash them out of spite, mostly because he's sure he'd survive it. "Very funny."

"All it took was a hippie that gives him candy," Natash adds, her voice dripping with smugness. "Who knew."

"Both of you can fuck off." Bucky doesn't like how close she just got to his primary motivation on the first try. Old habits die hard, et cetera. And he hates that he can't tell if she was trying to guess. If he's lucky, which he isn't, she was just making fun of him.

Natasha knows about his visits to the florist's website; he's fucking convinced of it now. He doesn't know how, and he can't outright call her on it. If he does, he could fuck up and make himself right. There is nothing worse than having the Black Widow as metaphorical family. Not even Steve's hovering.

She and Tony harass him for the remainder of the flight. It's not long, mercifully, and he's starting to regret not grabbing something for the doctor. They were in Montreal, of all places, so it would have been fitting. He figures she'll understand once he shows her his side. The train of thought makes him wonder what part of Canada she's originally from. She hasn't brought it up.

His foot is already bouncing by the time he reaches the elevator. He's still got the surgical towel shoved tightly against his ribs. He hopes she gets there fast if she ends up taking the call. The last thing he wants to do right now is sit around in the burn of antiseptic and bleach while he fights off the urge to bolt. 

This is good, Bucky reminds himself as he takes his first few steps into medical. He's sat through plenty of trips to emergency intake. He can handle walking into his first optional one. It's a non-issue. Completely.

When JARVIS informs him that his file and general vital scan have been submitted for intake, the buzzing gets so intense that he almost leaves. The pace of his sergeant walk, as Sam likes to designate it, slows to a crawl. Then he thinks about a doctor with concealed carry permits. One that lets her house be monitored by a government organization she's actively pushing herself to trust. All in an effort to contribute something good to the world. The buzzing eases, and he picks up his pace, headed for the solo observation room JARVIS listed for him.

There's no moment of standing involuntarily from nerves this time. He doesn't have to force himself to sit back down and wait, even though the room smells wrong. His skin is crawling, and he wants nothing more than to put a throwing knife in his hand like a goddamn security blanket. But he doesn't panic. He doesn't try leaving.

Baby steps.

When the door opens, it's devastating. There's no diminutive hippie with UFO-sized glasses smiling at him on the other side of it. It's a guy in a plain white lab coat without artistic stitching, one that Bucky's never met before in his life. He's already squinting down at a tablet, meaning this will be his doctor for the duration.

This was the worst plan he could have possibly conceived. The universe is humbling him for thinking he could get away with something like this without some kind of suffering. He just wanted to make up for being dismissive of her help initially. Now he gets to sit through this. How fucking grand.

"Barnes?" The doctor that's not Bucky's doctor looks up, his heart rate elevating by a few notches. He's putting in a lot of effort to look confident. It's not exactly working. "I'm Dr. Erickson. I'm guessing you're here for the bullet wounds JARVIS detected?"

"Yup." Bucky's not about to volunteer for small talk at the moment. It's a miracle he hasn't jumped off the biobed yet. "Where's Ryder?"

"Your primary is in a staff meeting at the moment." Erickson puts his tablet down on the supply cabinet's main counter. He's already starting to gather what he needs, leaving Bucky to figure out real quick if he's actually willing to do this. "Don't worry; I'll get you sewn up and on your way in no time."

He doesn't want it getting back to Ava that he bailed the moment she couldn't show up. He doesn't want to leave her with the impression that he's only going to take on medical care if it's her; that's not anywhere near fair. The woman is a brain surgeon, not his private physician. He can grow the fuck up and accept help from people that haven't gone through his gauntlet of verification.

"Great," he pushes out, lifting the side of his undershirt to offer an unobstructed view.

It's not great; it's fucking horrendous. The first touch of the new doctor makes the overly physical memory of the buzzing build so high, he can feel it in his teeth. They're not actually rattling in his jaw the way they did back then, he knows that, but it doesn't matter because his body is screaming at him that it's happening.

The first stitch going through his skin makes him want to put his fingers through the doctor's eye sockets. His mind goes over all the ways he can violently put at least ten feet between them without having to get up. Looking back, it's probably good he didn't reach for the throwing knives. He's not unhinged enough to stab someone unprovoked; he's better than that. But they'd have been distracting to his impulse control, that's for sure.

Dr. Handsy is pulling the first suture in tight when the door to the observation room opens again. Bucky doesn't look up, his eyes locked on a random point on the far wall while he focuses on his breathing. He only looks over when a billowing, maroon pant leg enters his peripheral.

Thanks to a bunch of dead Nazi scientists that used to hide out in the mountains of Russia, Bucky Barnes has a trigger in his brain that is entirely out of his control. One that, when activated by his own interest, lets him process his surroundings in a sliver of the time that it should for a human mind. It is exceptionally helpful in the field. 

Watching Ava Ryder walk in, wearing a suede jumpsuit that mercilessly frames her curves, proves to him that having it in the 30s would have gotten him shot by someone's father. Definitely before he left Brooklyn. Or before he got chased out by several fathers banding together with baseball bats. In the time it takes her hand to come off the door handle and make its way to her hip, his mind goes on one hell of a fucking journey.

He already had more than a vague idea of the shape of her before now; he can't help it. Comes with the territory of doing threat assessment for a living. God knows his eyes have slipped down to her chest on a shameful amount of occasions. Her tits are being held up and pushed together fucking beautifully at the moment. Typically, that would hold all of his attention.

But this is the first unobstructed view of her that he's gotten, thanks to the lab coat being nowhere in sight, and good fucking god. Holy fucking shit. Godfuckingdamn.

She's half turned from him at this angle, so he's only getting a side view. That's more than enough to show off an obscenely rounded ass and the cushy thighs it rests on that are going to haunt his fucking dreams. It's bigger than his hands by a margin that's outright glorious. The mental image of his fingers digging into it, of how it would make her skin dip under the pressure, makes his blood race.

He can't spot the outline of any underwear at first. Then her hand makes contact with the jumpsuit, and his eyes pick up on it. Right there, above the top of her finger, pulled up high over her hipbone. There's a thin band leaving an impression in the fabric. An extraordinarily thin band. There is nothing else in sight.

Pulled between Ava's legs, right at this very moment in time, is a strip of fabric that Bucky's tongue would fit against perfectly. Right under that is a taste he's been catching himself wondering about for two weeks now. One good, long drag of his nose. That's all it would take to push in whatever she's picked out for the day and soak it with that taste. He could get it back out from between her lips with his tongue, pull it to the side with his teeth to give himself room to feast—

Bucky tries to shift his weight as nonchalantly as possible while his brain slows back down. The comeback from tactical analysis is always jarring, with this one being especially so. 

He's the worst kind of bastard. An awful, selfish, perverted sonofabitch. There's not shit he can do to change that. How unfortunate.

"David," Ava greets, the name coming out as tense as the closed smile plastered on her face. "You can put that down."

The other doctor doesn't look up from the work his hands are doing. "That you, Ava? I heard you were—"

"Now."

Bucky's back straightens up as David looks at her nervously, taken aback. Bucky doesn't blame him; he didn't know her voice could get that forceful.

David sort of laughs, which feels like the worst possible choice to Bucky. But, hey, not his call. "What, do you want me to just—"

"I want your hands off my patient right now. I'm not asking." She watches with unwavering intensity as the other doctor lets the needle and thread drop from his hands. She visibly bristles at the patronizing expression on David's face, her head tilting aggressively. Bucky kind of wants to watch her hit him. "I'll be back in less than a minute, sergeant. I need a word outside with Dr. Erikson."

"Take your time," Bucky assures, the tension bleeding out of him already. His ribs are leaking, and there's a piece of doctor floss looped through his skin that he's going to have to cut out of himself tomorrow morning. The immoral evaluation of her outfit that his head threw at him is going to eat him alive. Forever. Especially when he's trying to fall asleep for the foreseeable future. 

All things considered, though, he feels fan-fucking-tastic.

David still looks somewhat shell-shocked, and there's real insult starting to creep into his posture, but the guy doesn't argue. He follows Ava back out of the room, not bothering with a goodbye in Bucky's direction. When the door closes behind them, his super hearing picks up on Ava reaming David about prioritizing patients before ego. She goes into detail about the deep shit he'll be in with her if he keeps ignoring her written orders, long before it ever gets him fired. She tacks on why her anger should scare him a hell of a lot more than the idea of that. Then she instructs him to keep his damn hands off her patients and get back to the intake desk. 

The protective streak makes Bucky's chest feel warm, a half-smile pulling at his lips. She's a handful, alright. One he'd give anything to be brave enough to send flowers to.

Ava is calm, cool, and collected when she leans back in through the doorframe, hanging off it with a soft smile. "Hiya, stranger. I hear you picked a fight in my motherland today."

"I hear it has an arms dealer problem. I wanted to see if I could help." He gestures down at the needle swinging from his ribs without looking at it. "Not all Canadians are as welcoming as you, turns out."

"Eh?" she fires back, hamming up the accent. "Wellll, I'm not about to let a few cranky arms dealers tarnish our reputation. What do you say you push that bandage against your new bragging rights, and we head for my office?"

Licking his bottom lip nervously, he tries to give her a confident smile. "You were busy with something."

"Not too busy for my favorite popsicle." One eyebrow raises sternly. "You are not allowed to tell Steve I'm playing favorites." God, she's cute when she tries to deflect. It's never worked. At least not on him.

"That's—" Shit, where to even find the fucking words for her. "You don't have to do this. Go out of your way like this. I don't mind getting patched up by random medics. Comes with the job."

Her smile turns impish. "That's cool and all, but I mind when people ignore basic ethics just to have a story about stitching up an Avenger. If you need to tell yourself I'm using you as fuel for a workplace pissing contest, go for it. Whatever gets you off that biobed." She leans back, leaving the door open wide behind her. "Come on; I can't stand the way they organize these damn shelves. I wouldn't patch you up in here even if you did pay me. Next time, head for my office first."

Bucky does as she ordered, pushing the surgical towel she packed for him against his side, not minding the sting in the least. He swallows down the point that, by every definition there is, he's not an Avenger. "I'll follow you, doc."

—

"Alright," Wyatt plops his hands down on the glass of the holo, his expression determined. His tight curls bounce with the motion, making their resident gumdrop look adorable, even through the discomfort. "Let's get to dissectin' this cacophony. All in one go, preferably, so I don't feel like yackin' up my lunch two days runnin'."

Ava's head tilts sympathetically. "Oh, honey, tell me you didn't—"

His hand comes up, with his index finger pointed to the ceiling. "Nope. But I got close a couple'a times thinkin' about this." He mutters several things under his breath about creepy Nazi bastards while he pulls up the raw data from Bucky's implants. "All the more reason to get it the hell over with."

"A whole day of digging through coded war crimes," Hannah deadpans quietly, raising a steaming mug to her lips. "I'm glad we get the fun assignments."

"You'd ditch us if we didn't," Ava jokes. She scrolls through the sergeant's file absentmindedly on her tablet, reviewing the vitals added just a few hours ago. He actually came to medical. For something as minor as a field injury. Of his own volition.

"Mmm. I don't know. It's pretty fun watching a brain move like Jell-O. You might have been able to convince me to stick around just for that."

SHIELD's primary system makes a blaring noise of disagreement as Wyatt loads the main file structure. He frowns, looking over at Ava with concern. "Its askin' for administrative override."

"Heeey, that's that thing Tony says I'm not supposed to abuse. That's probably not a good sign." Ava pushes her glasses further up the bridge of her nose and leans over to get a look at the error. "JAR, I'd like some reassurance we're not about to trigger an ancient LoJack if you wouldn't mind advising here."

"There are safeguards in place for importing code with an unknown source," JARVIS reports in. The warning on the screen is dismissed, presumably by him, and a new window comes up. A log of the programming in Bucky's cybernetics going through digital quarantine loads rapidly, with line after line being highlighted in red and labeled HYDRA Suspected. "I will process them for you. One moment."

"We have to clean the Nazi code before we can beat it to death," Hannah mumbles against the rim of her mug. "I think I kind of like that."

"Please, Hannie, I'm hangin' on by the skin'a my teeth here." Scrubbing his hands over his face, Wyatt groans exhaustedly. He drags them down slowly, giving Hannah a pleading look over the tops of his fingers. "You know I'm always here for supportin' you—"

"I'm aware." The ex-marine's clipped tone makes Ava snort and look back down at her tablet. They both know stopping him now isn't going to cut off the word vomit.

Wyatt's hands thunk back down onto the glass. "I'm so proud'a ya, y'know that—" And there's the thickening of the accent.

"I know."

Ava's eyes skim over the list of everything detected in Bucky's wound, locking on the word leather in particular. Today was her first look at his work gear—she's got a feeling he doesn't call it a uniform—in person. It was hard to keep professional in front of six and a half feet of Hi, how are ya? wrapped up in that much heavy black. The sounds that his vest made when he dropped it on the coffee table— Jesus. He's got to be packing enough in there to arm a small country. 

"All's I'm sayin' is that if I have to hear about murder right now, I might actually upchu—"

"Please don't."

Ava's too scared to ask what's in the sergeant's pants for a multitude of reasons. Professionalism is lower on the list than it probably should be. It's a shame, too. He's downright hilarious when he lets himself talk. There's not a doubt in her mind that he'd come up with something unbearably good—and unwaveringly dry—in response to the loaded question.

"A'right then. We're in agreement. No bad thoughts today. We go in like—like excavators, right? With our helmets and our 'lil pickaxes, and we get what we need so we can—" The way he cuts himself off makes Ava look back up in concern. She finds the most horrified expression on Wyatt's face. "That—ah shit, that didn't come out all that right. That was mean, wannit? Insensitive. I'm not tryin' to belittle what the sergeant's been through."

"You weren't belittling anything," Ava assures, reaching out to rub his arm. "I think he'd be the first one to race you to a fossil joke about this."

"You'll tell 'im I'm takin' this serious, won't ya—"

A small chuckle escapes before she can stop it. "Wyatt, sweetheart, it's not like he heard you—"

"You take your pills today, Combs?" Hannah's calm question makes the gumdrop freeze in place. She blows on her coffee, taking a small sip. "If you say you don't remember, I'm going to—"

Wyatt snaps his fingers, his expression shifting to relief. "I didn't, and I remember why, too." He rolls his chair back with a sudden push, aiming for his desk. He reaches out before the chair finishes the trip to grab his patch-covered messenger bag. "One'a the cats got int'a my coat closet; dumbass got stuck on a shelf for reasons I'm still not real clear on." He pops open his medication bottle, tossing a pill into his mouth with a level of dexterity that makes her jealous. "The hollerin' was s'damn loud, I thought the landlord was gonna come knockin'."

"Which one was it?" Ava asks. "Not the new kitten?"

"No, no—Juno's been'a dream. It was Galileo again. I love that furry little bastard, but sometimes he can drive me nutty ." He pauses to take a swig from another glossy vacation mug. Today's is advertising a campground Ava's never heard of that's the best in the Rockies, according to the swirling font. "I got new pictures of Juno if you want 'em, though."

"Yes, please," Ava confirms happily. Holding the teacup-sized ball of fur made her whole month when he last brought Juno in. Hannah ended up hogging most of the cuddle time, but the sound of little meows filling the day had been enough to make up for it.

Wyatt pulls his phone from his back pocket and brings it around to hook up to the holo. The system dings with the sound of a successful transfer after a moment. He loads a collection of new photos, zeroing in on one of Juno clawing her way up a window curtain—

The power to the lab shuts off with a loud, electric click. Everything plunges into darkness with the privacy setting on the glass walls keeping the sun out. It comes back on before Ava can react, the building's primary system switching to the emergency power grid. She and Wyatt lock eyes in panic.

"Oooh man, boss, did I just—"

"I'm sure you didn't," Ava comforts, trying to push down her own panic. It helps that she's heard Tony rambling about the work he's put into making this place indestructible. "JAR?" 

There's no response from the AI. She trades another nervous glace with Wyatt.

"I know it was probably the Nazi shit, but I'm hoping it was the cats," Hannah says, sounding sincere. "I feel like that'll make a much better story."

"Oh my god, did I break JAR?" Wyatt looks between them frantically. "How often does he back up his servers? Did I kill'a piece'a JAR?!"

"I have not been murdered," the AI confirms after nearly a minute of being gone. "The safeguards reported a false positive regarding the programming of Sergeant Barnes' cybernetics. It has been handled."

Ava gives the hologram wall of code a warry look. "Handled by you?" There's a suspicion building in her gut around his phrasing, one that she's not planning on letting out of her teeth. 

"Mr. Stark has a protocol in place that cuts off my servers in the event of any irregular activity. Given the nature of the programming's origin, the system is designed to er on the side of caution."

"That's a really fancy way of dancing around the point, JAR." She's trying to stay civil about this. It's not an easy venture, and she's pretty sure it's not translating at all. Even she can hear the frustration in her voice. "How about we cut the shit, and you tell me what the false positive was."

"There are automated routines running for Sergeant Barnes' implants. They are not harmful; I've taken the liberty of checking them personally now that they've been cleared through quarantine. I am creating a stable update to forward to—"

"How long have they not been harmful, JARVIS?"

Hannah sits up from her relaxed position at the avoidance of their favorite nickname for the AI. Wyatt's brows pull in nervously, his eyes never leaving Ava. They both know exactly what she's digging at.

There's a long hesitation from JARVIS. Short by normal social standards but an eternity for a sentience with quantum processors. "There is not currently a risk posed within the Sergeant's—"

Ava's out of her chair and halfway to the door before he even finishes the omission. Fueled by some of the most intense rage she's ever felt in her life, she marches out on swift feet. She's going to kill him. She's going to string him up—maybe hang him off the side of the tower.

America's fucking Sweetheart, her ass. America's Doomed Liar is a lot more like it.

"Where is he," Ava nearly growls, still stalking down the halls, leaving the medical wing in a hurry. "JARVIS, I know you're still listening; you tell me where that puffed-up, hypocritical—oooh , you tell me where Rogers is right the fuck now. And then you tell me where Stark is—"

"Dr. Ryder, I know you're not inclined to believe this at the moment, but I assure you—"

"You're right; I'm not inclined to do that at all." She takes a deep breath as she passes through the front entrance, slowing herself to a stop. With genuine effort, she pushes down her anger. "I don't want to keep yelling at you. I don't like doing it in the first place. If you don't want to tell me where they are, I'll find them myself."

Ava heads for the elevator to do just that. She's not expecting a response as she pounds the side of her fist against the button for the Datacrux's floor. It's likely to be her best bet to find any of them. There's not a chance in hell that she's letting her team dedicate any more time to this until she gets some fucking explanations.

Halfway along the ride up, the light around the button goes dim. A flash of anger rises in her until she sees the one for the executive level illuminate. 

"Mr. Stark is not currently in the tower, but you will find Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes debriefing in the Situation Room," JARVIS informs her over the elevator's intercom, making the SHEILD agents around her pretend not to look over. She's tempted to ask them if it's the outfit.

"Thank you, JAR," she offers as an olive branch. Regardless of what's truly going on here, she doubts the AI is all that comfortable with the subject.

"You're welcome, Ava."

She's only been to this part of the tower once before. Tony dragged her up to the Avenger's balcony for a party after her divorce was first finalized. That's about the extent of her experience with this section. It's not hard to find her way with everything denoted like it is in the rest of the building.

The palm of her hand smacks against the door marked Situation Room, and she shoves it open aggressively. Both super soldiers, the Falcon, Black Widow, and a scattered group of SHIELD agents stare back at her in surprise. It doesn't slow her down any.

Ava points an irate finger at Steve in the uneasy silence of the room. "Unless New York just caught fire, you and I are about to have a very blunt conversation, captain."

"Hiya, doc." Bucky, unsurprisingly, is the only one in the room smiling at her while she glares daggers at Captain America. He's still in his not-uniform. There's still blood on it. The charm he's throwing her way reminds her that they won't want an audience. 

"I'm going to ask the rest of you to leave," she continues, but her eyes stay on the sergeant as her finger lowers. "I don't think you'll want to be here for this, Bucky."

"What makes you think I don't wanna watch you beat up my best friend?" He leans back in his chair, his hands coming up to rest on his stomach as his smile deepens.

"Can I stay?" Sam asks, his voice eager. It's a damn shame this is how she gets to meet him. She doubts the Falcon has any clue about unethical research.

"Come on," Natasha insists with a serene nod in Ava's direction, grabbing Sam's shirt to drag him up from his chair. "You heard her."

"I—hey!" Steve looks so insulted as he watches his friends and various coworkers abandon him with zero hesitation. "You're just gonna—I don't even know what I did!"

"Neither do I, but I am very ready to hear about it," Bucky assures Ava, not an increasingly distressed Steve.

Ava taps her foot impatiently as the room clears out, leaving her alone with the super soldiers. She ignores the nerves radiating off of one of them and focuses on the one that looks delighted. "I'm serious. This is about your case. Specifically, the work HYDRA was trying to finish."

The mirth leaves Bucky almost entirely. His posture doesn't adjust from its reclined position. "Alright. Tell me what's got you livid about it."

"Steve here made me a promise that was broken in my lab a few minutes ago."

Steve's eyebrows pull in with confusion. "Which promise? Wait—a few minutes ago—Is this about that blackout? Ava, catch me up here; what the hell is—"

"You swore to me that the intention of HYDRA—at least where Bucky's case is concerned—was to make an army of super soldiers, nothing more." She's letting him process this one step at a time. It'll make yelling at him for lying a lot easier. That, and she's honestly worried the technophobe doesn't understand the gravity of the situation.

"I—" Steve hesitates, and she watches the switch to tactical assessment come over him. It's startling to see it directed at her from a face that isn't Bucky's. "As far as I know, that was the intention."

"Yeah? You're sure about that? You're sure you're not omitting something pretty fucking important to my job, Steven?"

"JARVIS, what was the blackout?" Bucky questions at half the volume he started at when she first came in.

Ava points at the sergeant insistently. "See? I'm guessing he doesn't even know, but he's sure as hell already on the right track."

"There was an incident regarding the coding found in your implants, Sergeant Barnes. It has been handled. I have prepared an update to their systems whenever you're ready to undergo a transfer."

"As your doctor, I'm ordering it. We can go back to my office after I'm finished ripping your friend a new asshole for lying to my face." Her eyebrows lower at Bucky in indignation. She's doing this for him, but that doesn't mean she's going to let him off the hook if he knew. "We should probably figure out if I need to do the same to you before we get there."

"Hey, hang on now." Steve raises one hand, likely to try to calm her, but changes his mind and puts it back under the table. She's guessing someone's finally clued in the out-of-time man about that practice making women want to throw something. At his head. "We might not always be able to talk about classified information—something you agreed to, I might add—but I've never lied about HYDRA's intent as far as I comprehend it. I've been very careful to hold up that end of our deal."

"Let me tell you how I know, for a fact, that someone involved in this case is doing a piss-poor job of lying to me about it. Since you haven't quite figured out modern tech, I'm going to try to keep it simple." Ava points a far less aggressive, more instructing finger at Bucky's arm. "In order for that hunk of metal to work, it needs to be programmed. The hardware needs software that can tell it how to read brain signals. A few decades ago, some Nazis sat in a room and wrote a bunch of code for that software. That's what was supposed to be in Bucky's implants. That's all that was supposed to be in Bucky's implants."

"Wait—what the hell else is in them?" The flicker of fear that creeps into Bucky's expression breaks her heart. There's not a doubt in her mind that he could sell her on any lie he wants to with his mind set on it. That's the point of infiltrators like him. 

But Ava's willing to bet everything she's got in this world that the fear in him at the moment is genuine. He doesn't know. And it makes her feel awful.

"Given the size of your implants, I'm guessing not much," she tries to reassure. "We can always purge whatever is there later. However, if the code were as simple as 'read this signal, do this thing,' it wouldn't have been flagged as untouchable by Tony's security measures. The ones put in specifically to prevent JARVIS from being corrupted." She crosses her arms over her chest in exasperation, her eyes moving to one of the small security cameras on the ceiling. "Would you like to explain to the captain what kind of code it would take to accomplish that, JARVIS?"

There's another human-length moment of hesitation from the AI in response. "It would take adapting code."

"The part he's holding back—definitely because he's under orders not to break SHIELD protocol—is that something has to be driving the adaptation. There is such a thing as self-adapting code; that would absolutely explain it. If we weren't talking about something made in the 40s when HYDRA needed entire warehouses just to house a few terabytes of data." She glances over at Bucky. "While I'm sure the agents you scare the piss out of would disagree, your head isn't actually big enough to hold that much."

"You flirtin' with me to stop the panic or to apologize for not being Canadian for a minute?"

Ava blinks in surprise, the slightest hint of heat coming up the sides of her neck. That—she hadn't been—well. Steve's head turns to him, his eyebrows raising in mild shock.

Bucky clears his throat, then tries for a quiet chuckle, his eyes floating between her and the table. "Sorry—it's this damn room. Puts me in sergeant mode, makes me—let's get back to yelling at Steve."

"Thanks, asshole, I appreciate—"

"What makes you think I won't yell at you just because I'm Canadian?" Ava counters, finally recovering. "You trying to stereotype me, Barnes?"

The relief that comes off of Bucky is palpable. "I'd go for the hippie thing first if I was trying to do that."

"Didn't you sleep through the McCarthy era?"

"HYDRA gave me the long and short of it between naps."

Her hand flies up to her face to block a loud snort. Damn him, this is serious. But she's not about to begrudge him the gallows humor. She lowers it again while he smirks at her. "Do you mind? I'm trying to make an angry but valid point here."

"About a bunch of code that my head isn't big enough for," he continues for her dryly, one hand coming off his stomach to gesture up at it.

Ava sighs, the amusement from getting sidetracked by the Brooklyn heartstopper fading fast. "Not big enough by the standards of the 40s. By today's standards?" Her head tilts to the side sadly, readying herself to watch that fear in him get more substantial. "You tell me, Buck. Did the Nazis work in the mindset of single projects, or did they work in the mindset of generations that would lead a global empire?"

The words are the last piece to complete the puzzle in Bucky's mind; Ava can see it happen in his eyes. The expression of horror it yanks out of him will haunt her for the rest of her days. "Zola." 

It's said in a whisper, and Ava's not even sure what the word is. 

It takes Steve longer to reach whatever conclusion Buckys come to, and he looks resistant to the idea at first. "No, that's... no—Buck, you've been to what's left. You know what it took—"

"That's the point she's making, stupid. Look at how small everything's gotten." He stops, and Ava doesn't miss the sight of a hard swallow. "It makes sense. Think about it. It makes sense. They took care of the car until they could find an engine that fit. I was the prototype. Or—was going to be, at least."

The comparison—the one he's using on himself—is revolting. Accurate, but astoundingly revolting. She pushes past it, leaning down to tap a condescending nail on the table. "Hi, there. Still here. Still looking for some answers. What the hell is Zola?"

With Steve watching him like a hawk, Bucky breathes a long, tired sigh. "Not what. Who." 

"I can fill her in," Steve offers to him quickly. "You don't have to do this."

"Oh, I'm not doing shit. She's going to do it all." Bucky locks eyes with Ava, his expression passive. Having the Winter Soldier himself that focused in on her makes her breath catch involuntarily. "How's your Russian, doc?"

"I don't speak a word of it. Do I need to for this?"

"No, I'm sure you've got plenty of ways to translate anything you feel like reading. You should look up doveryai, no proveryai while you're at it." He leans forward, resting his arms on the table. His eyes never once move away from hers. "JARVIS, transfer a copy of my archive access to Dr. Ryder. Full permissions. And the next time she asks you a hard question, you don't have to bullshit her. Tell her to call me."

—

April 6th, 2015

"I want you to bring me with you next time."

"No."

"Is that a no because you do not agree or because you are afraid of mother?"

"Both."

Shuri frowns at the security feed, ignoring the quiet laughter she can hear coming from Nakia on the other end. "Coward."

The camera mounted on T'Challa's dashboard shakes as he turns it back to his face, his expression annoyed. "Say that to my—"

"Coward."

T'Challa rolls his eyes and turns the camera back around as Nakia laughs harder. He will be mopey now, for sure. "I am not taking you to stare at a soldier's office with us."

"Why not?"

"To start with, I refuse to be trapped in a car with you for that amount of time."

"You should be so lucky! Now, what is the real reason."

"What part of royal family do you not—"

"You get to go to these things."

"And when you leave your lab long enough to learn to use the spears of your foremothers, that privilege can extend to you."

"Okoye is always ready to teach you, Shuri," Nakia offers up diplomatically. 

"I do not need a spear to sit in a car annoying my brother," Shuri argues. They always do this to her. She is tired of it.

"You do not need to sit in a car annoying your bother at all." The moping has already started. She can hear it in T'Challa's voice.

"Fine. I will go to Ava's house and stay there while—"

"No."

Shuri slams her hands down on her desk, making the various instruments on it rattle precariously. "She is my family, too!"

There's silence on the other end in the wake of her anger. Then the camera turns again, this time by Nakia's hand. She doesn't stop the spin until it's pointed to show her and T'Challa. He does not look as annoyed anymore. He looks guilty.

Nakia gives her a sympathetic smile. "No one is trying to take that from you. We are only trying to keep you safe. We do not know how far Alec is willing to take things."

"And I am not willing to present the man with more temptations of power," T'Challa adds, the guilt on his face shifting to resignation. "It is not simply because I am afraid of our mother. I agree with her. And with our father. Alec Harlow is a man that is losing everything. That is a powerful motivator, Shuri."

"I am not afraid of that spineless demon," Shuri insists angrily. "I could handle him myself, thank you very much."

"Half the school children in Wakanda could," Nakia mocks under her breath.

She gets a stern look from T'Challa before he focuses it on Shuri. "It is not his strength we are concerned with. It is the allies he can call upon at any time. Men with strength and resources that we do not wish to deal with."

Some of the fight leaves her. Not much, but it does ebb. Her brother might be an idiot, but he is right about this. Ava would not be this afraid for no reason. She has been trying to disguise it when Nakia brings her for visits, which is how Shuri knows it is serious.

"I hate that man, brother." The word is far too inadequate. The contempt she holds for the worm who put fear in the heart of her favorite mad scientist feels immeasurable.

"As do I. As do we all." T'Challa smiles at her finally, his face softening. "I promise to bring you to hit him if he is ever arrested. That is when I will deem it safe enough."

"How many times?" she chases after quickly. "Can I bring a weapon?"

"You can bring exactly one weapon. Can you guess what it is?" The smile turns sarcastic as he reaches out and turns the camera back around to face Alec's office window. 

"I do not need a spear to break that man."

"No, you need it so I can stop being lectured by Okoye for enabling your avoidance of tradition."

"That will not help. She wishes for me to sit through her lessons. I would just bring the spear to hit him over the head with."

Nakia laughs, the sound light and soothing. "I am surprised you did not go straight for the idea of skewering him."

Tilting her head down at her desk, Shuri hesitates. She picks up the ridiculous coffee mug Ava got her, spinning it around in her hands with somber movements. 

Ava's last visit had been especially hard to stomach. The woman had looked so... empty as she talked about the start of the divorce. There had been no vengeful joy in her as she told Shuri's father she understood the gravity of the situation. No hard-won victory in her posture. There had only been grief and shame.

Shuri sighs, turning away from the screen to head for her lab's kitchen. She is going to fill the mug with one of the teas that Ava brings her. It will be a nice change from the energy drinks she has been binging. "No. I... I do not wish the man dead. I only wish to see him locked away somewhere he can never smile again."

—author end notes—

there’s one sentence in this chapter that is 14 words long (including contractions) that is the entire foundation of their incoming dom/sub and oh my g o d when i tell you that shit was cathartic to write 😫🤌 some day when this is finished, im gonna write a whole goddamn dissertation on that one sentence and all the narrative shit that tied into it in this fic so help me (YOURE ALLOWED TO GUESS BTW)

anyways, everyone is alive in wakanda bc i said so. and nakia and t’challa are really stupid uber mega important to ava’s backstory

i feel like we’ve all, as a species, Been Through Enough. you can talk my ear off abt anything, but dont talk to me abt the opening of wakanda forever i will Literally Die, i havent cried that hard over the first watch of a movie in so fucking long and i dont think im strong enough for a second. all i ever need for binging is winter soldier and black panther anyhow (FATWS is still growing on me and i only like it so far bc im a sambucky shipper. and a stucky shipper. and a 3 musketeer shipper. and a—i like making buckaroo be in love a lot. lets just. leave it at that). we can stop with the big owies thanks. let me escape to the fictional world where everyone is alive and Nothing Hurts, t h a n k s.

well. okay. some things are gonna hurt in this. probably really super bad too and youre gonna be really really mad at me when it hits. but like. theyre set up for comfort pay off so does it even really count??? i didnt think so, ty for agreeing 😌

ily 💖 tyty for reading 💞 and tyty in advance for yelling at me when i eventually hurt u ❤️🥰 i will understand, its okay, u are entitled to the emotional compensation on that one

#chapter update #good space

[mysteriouslypeculiar]

DECEMBER 24TH NINE PM EASTERN STANDARD TIME

From here on in

I shoot without a script

See if anything comes of it

Instead of my old shit

First shot -- Roger

Tuning the Fender guitar

He hasn't played in a year.

ROGER

This wont tune.

MARK

So we hear, hah.

He's just coming back from half a year

of withdraw.

ROGER

Are you talking to me?

MARK

Not at all.

Are you ready? Hold that focus.

Steady. Tell the folks at home what

youre doing Roger.

ROGER

I'm writing one great song---

MARK

The phone rings

ROGER

Saved!

MARK

We screen.

Zoom in on the answering machine.

ROGER AND MARK

Speak!(Beep)

MOM

hat was a very loud beep

I don't even know if this is working

Mark -- Mark -- are you there

Are you screening your calls --

It's mom

We wanted to call and say we love you

And we'll miss you tomorrow

Cindy and the kids are

here -- send their love

Oh, I hope you like the hot plate

Just don't leave it on, dear

When you leave the house

Oh, and Mark

We're sorry to hear

that Maureen dumped you

I say c'est la vie

So let her be a lesbian...

There are other fishies in the sea

... Love Mom!

MARK

Tell the folks at home what your

doing Roger!

ROGER

I'm writing one great song.

MARK

The phone rings.

ROGER

Yesss!

MARK

We screen.

MARK AND ROGER

Speak!(Beep)

COLLINS

Chestnuts`roasting...

ROGER AND MARK

Collins!

COLLINS

Im downstairs.

MARK

Hey!

COLLINS

Roger picked up the phone?

MARK

No, its me.

COLLINS

Throw down the key.

MARK

A wild night is now pre-ordained!

COLLINS

I may be detained.

MARK

What does that mean?

(phone rings)

What do you mean "detained"?

BENNY

Ho ho ho

MARK AND ROGER

Benny! Shit.

BENNY

Dudes Im on my way.

MARK AND ROGER

Great! Fuck.

BENNY

I need some rent.

MARK

What rent?

BENNY

This past years rent, which I let slide.

MARK

Let slide?

You said we were golden.

ROGER

When you bought the building.

MARK

When we were roomates?

ROGER

Remember? You lived here?

BENNY

How could I forget? You, me, Collins and Maureen.

How is the drama queen?

MARK

Shes performing tonight.

BENNY

I know. Still her production

manager?

MARK

2 days ago I was bumped.

BENNY

You still dating her?

MARK

Last month I was dumped.

ROGER

Shes in love.

BENNY

Shes got a new man?

MARK

Well...no.

BENNY

Whats his name?

MARK AND ROGER

Joanne

BENNY

Rent, my amigos is due. Or I will have to evict you. See you in a few.

[sick guitar riff]

MARK

The power blows.

[music starts]

Play video

[MARK]

How do you document real life

When real life is getting more

Like fiction each day

Headlines -- bread-lines

Blow my mind

And now this deadline

"Eviction -- or pay"

Rent!

[ROGER]

How do you write a song

When the chords sound wrong

Though they once sounded right and rare

When the notes are sour

Where is the power

You once had to ignite the air

[MARK]

And we're hungry and frozen

[ROGER]

Some life that we've chosen

[TOGETHER]

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

Last year's rent

[MARK]

We light candles

[ROGER]

How do you start a fire

When there's nothing to burn

And it feels like something's stuck in your flue

[MARK]

How can you generate heat

When you can't feel your feet

[BOTH]

And they're turning blue!

[MARK]

You light up a mean blaze

[ROGER grabs one of his own posters.]

[ROGER]

With posters --

[MARK grabs old manuscripts.]

[MARK]

And screenplays

[ROGER AND MARK]

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

Last year's rent

[Lights go down on the loft and go up on JOANNE JEFFERSON,]

[who's at the pay phone.]

[JOANNE]

[On phone]

Don't screen, Maureen

It's me -- Joanne

Your substitute production manager

Hey hey hey! (Did you eat?)

Don't change the subject Maureen

But darling -- you haven't eaten all day

You won't throw up

You won't throw up

The digital delay ---

Didn't blow up (exactly)

There may have been one teeny tiny spark

You're not calling Mark

[COLLINS]

How do you stay on your feet

When on every street

It's 'trick or treat'

(And tonight it's 'trick')

'Welcome back to town'

Oh, I should lie down

Everything's brown

And uh -- oh

I feel sick

[MARK]

[At the window]

Where is he?

[COLLINS]

Getting dizzy

[He collapses.]

[MARK AND ROGER]

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

Last year's rent

[MARK and ROGER stoke the fire. Crosscut to BENNY's Range Rover.]

BENNY

[On cellular phone]

Alison baby -- you sound sad

I don't believe those two after everything I've done

Ever since our wedding I'm dirt -- They'll see

I can help them all out in the long run

[Three locales: JOANNE at the pay phone,]

[MARK and ROGER in their loft, and COLLINS on the ground.]

[The following is sung simultaneously.]

[BENNY]

Forces are gathering

Forces are gathering

Can't turn away

Forces are gathering

[COLLINS]

Ughhhhh--

Ughhhhh--

Ughhhhh-- I can't think

Ughhhhh--

Ughhhhh--

Ughhhhh-- I need a drink

[MARK (reading from a script page)]

"The music ignites the night with passionate fire"

[JOANNE]

Maureen -- I'm not a theatre person

[ROGER]

"The narration crackles and pops with incendiary wit"

[JOANNE]

Could never be a theatre person

[MARK]

Zoom in as they burn the past to the ground

[JOANNE (realizing she's been cut off)]

Hello?

[MARK AND ROGER]

And feel the heat of the future's glow

[JOANNE]

Hello?

[The phone rings in the loft. MARK picks it up.]

[MARK]

[On phone]

Hello? Maureen?

--Your equipment won't work?

Okay, all right, I'll go!

[MARK AND HALF OF COMPANY]

How do you leave the past behind

When it keeps finding ways to get to your heart

It reaches way down deep and tears you inside out

Till you're torn apart

Rent!

[ROGER AND OTHER HALF OF COMPANY]

How can you connect in an age

Where strangers, landlords, lovers

Your own blood cells betray

[ALL]

What binds the fabric together

When the raging, shifting winds of change

Keep ripping away

[BENNY]

Draw a line in the sand

And then make a stand

[ROGER]

Use your camera to spar

[MARK]

Use your guitar

[ALL]

When they act tough - you call their bluff

[MARK AND ROGER]

We're not gonna pay

[MARK AND ROGER WITH HALF OF COMPANY]

We're not gonna pay

[MARK AND ROGER WITH OTHER HALF OF COMPANY]

We're not gonna pay

[ALL]

Last year's rent

This year's rent

Next year's rent

Rent rent rent rent rent

We're not gonna pay rent

[ROGER AND MARK]

'Cause everything is rent

#ITS TIME

[bookofmariokingofmaiami]

This is the second time making this post because i am angry as fuck because for some reason when I added the names it didn't save so I'm doing this shit again 

Hey! I had a stupendus idea, the past few days I've gathered a bunch of mitten squad quotes and captain sauce quotes

Soooo, I'll put wich book of mario characters would say each quote and we'll see what happens

Yes I know 99% of the mitten squad quotes is gonna be bolivia and carbon

Also, some quotes reference characters and locations, so I'll put an [ ] with what I think the book of mario counterpart would be

MITTEN SQUAD SEGMENT 

Lewis:"I have successfully turned an ordinary kitchen utensil into the most valuable fork in the known universe, no one man should have this kind of power, but I am not mortal man, as a sexualy identity as a big rock being thrown into the ocean"

Princess of peaches, talking about 1 TEC-20"The robot wasn't able to pick the lock and I lacked the fire power to blow the bitch open" 

Marc:"I left a broom there too so my bucket wouldn't be lonely"

Carbon:"Calm down vegetarians I am talking about animals in video games, animals in real life matter way less"

Barney one:"Killing it isn't the hard part, the hard part is getting away from the explosion of the goddamm Nagasaki bomb strapped up its ass that was rigged to explode once it died"

Bolivia:"Todd Howard [barbie], even in death you find a way to fuck me"

Bolivia:"We came back to the little shit with the ant problem and killed most of the ants, I left one alive for the boy, either he becomes a man or that ant will have a very good day" 

Goomb:"Me brain fixed gud no hurt no more"

Marc:"Picked up trash for the make a wish kid"

Bolivia, talking about maria:"Because she hits like a bull with down syndrome and has the personality of a piece of plywood"

Belize:"You might be wondering, who is the boy and who is the girl? I won't give it away but I will say this, the knife is a whore"

Maria:"I had armor, i had supplies, i had pockets full of room temperature tomatos"

Bolivia:"For some reason I thought that stupid the horse v2 could fly, bad decision on my part"

Carbon:"For some reason this shrapnel character had 200 BB's, what a weirdo, who caries around 200 BB's?, anyway, I talked to daddy and brought my 300 BB's and headed off to clear off the Jefferson memorial"

Goverman::"Get a juice box and strap on your helmet, because we're going to hell"

Carbon:"I punched a puppy to death"

Marc:"My iq is similar to that of a 14 year old block of cheese"

Lewis:"Theres an oxygen exhaust pipe, the second best tipe of pipe to suck on to keep yourself alive, for those who need hand holding, that was not a drug reference, this is a family friendly channel, it was a suicide joke"

Bolivia:"I got an amazing slow motion shot of dogmeat getting fucked to death by a nuclear warhead"

Maria:"My only option was to become a vampire, wich sucked"

Bolivia:"But just as when like how every virtual dog goes to hell when it dies, what the fuck does that even mean?"

Carbon:"I took advantage of a unconscious military officer and beat him to death"

Barney one:"Nothing else says more victory than overdosing on drugs after a war"

Prof. Ceasar reality:"And decided to go to the much bigger and much more research facility x-13 research facility facility center, WHAT? I think I had a stroke"

Bolivia:"Used more than 3% of my frag mines to blow up a dog"

Carbon:"The last few coursers ran for their non existence lives and I went after them because I'm not letting anyone get away, one got away"

Maria:"I got a warning saying that nuka world is intended for those level 30 or above, Mathematics show us that me being lv11 is close enough to lv30"

Carbon:"Killed a pain-maker and got a glimpse into the big G in the sky who manifested himself as a fire axe floating in the air, this voodoo shit has no place in zion so I chopped of the pain-maker's legs and arms so If there is an afterlife he will be a cripple in hell for all eternity"

Goverman:"Its head turned into jelly, I threw its egg down into the nightmare bellow, and then I jumped after it"

Carbon:"A herd of big hornets paid the ultimate price for being alive"

Goverman:"Used his gun to turn off a woman"

Maria:"Me being the player can't open the door, theres a know you have to twist it its a whole process"

Goverman explained why maria survived the fall:"One of them belonged to God and refused to die"

Goombell, talking about hoko saba:"The dragon I pretended to not exist a few minutes ago is one of my mom's friend's kids so I had to play with him even tho he's weird"

Belize:"There was no hamster's luck in a garbage disposal chance that I would follow this giant fuck all the way to the cit ruins"

Lewis:"Along the way i saved a shopping cart from drowning and returned it to its family"

Prof. Ceasar reality:"Its about 24 million cheez its away from New vegas"

Bolivia:"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to bedworld"

Carbon:"With enough notches in my pistol to spell psychopath in braille"

Gooverman:"I spie with my little eye a ville whore who deserves to die, I cleaved her back in half with my stick and what I saw was glorious"

Maria?:"Its kinda like playing the floor is lava, but you can't see the lava and instead of burning to death you turn into a vegetable"

IDK"I hid from Ringo by hiding in ringo"

Bolivia:"The plate worked as well I thought it would, wich means it didn't work"

Bolivia:"There was a 3 for 1 discount on dead raiders if you use the promo code granade at checkout"

Belize:"The only explanation is that has a 5th appendage wich he pulls out on special occasions, wich probably isn't the case, we all know elmo doesn't pull out"

Goomb:"You don't need those things, Jesus got trough his life without any guns"

Goombape:"When i played it as a children"

Barbie:"Its like how you don't know if your life has any meaning until you die and see your score"

Belize:"This was the most stealth oriented part of the game by a metric mile"

Bolivia:"I stripped him naked, talked with Elliot [lewis] whose face bothered me for some reason,Talked with the samurai[maria], talked with red dead redemption [barney one]"

Carbon:"Some idiot spilled red paint on the clouds"

Bolivia:"Before traveling with the wizard, I spent some time pestering earnie with the prospect of friendship, by walking back and forth in front of him, making him think i wanted to talk to him just for me to keep on walking,I was voted the quietest guy I high-school and I know how loud earnie is screaming inside his head right now, it's kinda fun to be in this side of it :) ,also this isn't related to the video in any way, I just wanted to make it known that i have a sealed copy of elmos letter adventure for Nintendo 64 and you don't"

Maria:"I knew I could use that as a lighthouse of sorts in order to cast myself further into the ocean until i drowned in my own disappointment"

Goombell:"Vulpes[carbon] was adopted, his mother is both infertile and imaginary"

Belize:"Being alone is mental, you can be surrounded by friends family laughs and love on Christmas morning and still be alone in your head"

Bolivia:"I acted in self defense by committing various war crimes"

Carbon:"My throwing spears were broken and wouldn't fly,stupid fucking game" 

Bolivia:"That wasn't a lie, it just wasn't the truth"

Maria:"If there's anything Shaun b knows to do is die"

Boombell:"The number of bear traps I activated for sexual reasons turned my angles into a fine powder"

Goverman:"Where the grass is green and the air is even greener"

IDK"I consulted a doctor who flucked out of medical school and followed his advice by killing myself"

Belize:"Being a futuristic[X-nauti], nazi dominated world version of polly poc,etc it has its own set of drawbacks"

Marc:"They're mass effect 3 of fallout 3's 5th dlc, I've never played mass effect"

Lewis:"Who loves their father like how their brother loves his mother's sister"

Carbon:"Like most existential crises it went away after I killed somebody"

Carbon:"If you're wraped in chains and dropped into an empty bathtub to drown, a snorklew won't save you"

Goombape:""A wise man once said "hi! Jeanie may's here"  and he's right, there has to be a better way""

Browser:"After it took 3 grown man to kidnap a baby with a gun"

goldbob:"The lever action gun riffle can kill a mutant in a single shot if you land a shot that can kill it in one hit"

Maria:"Its 2020, Noone wants to use their hands anymore"

Bolivia:"Before journeying into more death, some jackass hit me with a granade and killed me, not the explosion, the granade bouncing off my soon to be corpse is was what made me dead"

Belize:"Some Neanderthals gave me their bullets to hold in a pretty rude way >:("

Princess of peaches:"Im not worried about offending blind people, it's not like they'll be watching this"

Carbon:"30 seconds is longer than you'd think, ask anyone whose been on fire"

Lewis:"I was as useful as a comatose toddler with a nerf gun at pearl harbor"

Goomb:"I also poused the challenge to satisfy the curiosity of mine regarding the birds in the sky that Don real because birds aren't exist"

Marc:"Any doctor worth their weight in styrofoam cups can fix a leg with their feet"

Bolivia:"I had me a silenced weapon, but I didn't account for today being his birthday, this changes everything, so I shaped for hollow point"

Carbon:"Maybe if Steve earlin had a gun instead of a snorklew he'd still be alive today"

Marc:"It took me 30 minutes and 3 phone calls to get my food because I'm too much of a pussy to go outside at 10 o'clock at night while drunk in a Christmas sweater after news year to steal my own food of one my neighbors doorstep"

Maria:"We've got rogue, tank dampse, and squidword"

Lewis;"And they're no joke, but I am, I am the big joke and my body is the punchline"

Bolivia:"I got mentally Nagasaki'd by this guy at the stables"

IDK"And went outside where Victor is unhappy with me, after killing Victor, Victor came out of the lucky 38 to avenge victor" 

Bolivia:" i shot a kid, i sent that little bitch to the moon"

Sushiya,  testing her products:"The door was of its axis, a plate was misbehaving on the chair, a cattle was dancing on the table like the whore she is"

Carbon:"And went shopping for dead bodies, they weren't in stock,  but i know a guy who knows a guy who could help me out, both of those guys are me"

Bolivia:"Now vault yosh is I your head too, and he won't be going anywhere"

Maria's son:"As much of a monster that I look like, I think it's gonna work"

Sushiya:"But you know what they say, imagination is what happens when annoyance meets drug use"

Carbon:"If they're stupid enough to be in my way they might as well be my enemy"

Goverman:"But the slippery bastard was too clever, he walked around it, I didn't even know that such a maneuver was even possible"

IDK"Homeland security at this point has yet to be impregnated by a sentient barrel of oil"

Bolivia:" if I drunkenly put a giant hole on my sink with a goddam coffee cup imagine what I could do with a gun"

Belize:"Got ambushed in the freezer while searching for chicken nuggets"

Goverman:"But the fucken bullet Williams come flying out of fucking nowhere"

Maria:"The next second you're in a universe where everything that exists is the sick bastard child of a drunken fuckfest between a pin screen and a light brush"

Bolivia:"Ask the cashier if they have a granade, if they say no, say nothing for a few seconds, put a big smile, put your hands on theirs and quietly ask, would you like one?"

Sean hampton:"Can't do anything until I have my arms around a fat man"

Barbie:"The premise of this run is that I have no arms and I must dab"

Maria's son:"I told you before that I was a genetic disaster"

Bolivia:"And in that cabin, theres some west Virginian mountain folk who are so deep in incest that one of them somehow managed to be his own father"

Bolivia:"Can you hear that? It's…. It's an air conditioner! And it's so fucking anoying, aw no I hurt it's feelings :( "

Goverman:"He could probably put the end of his musket inside his mouth, pull the trigger and still miss"

Barney one:"The big beaver ended his life in stile, he even made a summersault into the afterlife"

Goverman:"Im a good Christian boy,  I'll save my ammo for my suicide"

Carbon:"I am not Cinderella, I'm a parasite"

IDK"I played with a doggy too, it used the flesh on my arm as a chew toy, and I booked his nose with a nuclear newspaper to show that that kind of thing isn't allowed in the mitten squad household"

Sean hampton:"The crusable is a magical weapon like divorce papers, capable of tearing everything it comes across in half"

Barbie:"The curse of grandma sparkle managed to reach me all the way in hell"

Barney one:"If you are gonna get a cat, you might get a gun aswell"

Belize:"Corn on the Joe sat back not helping his brother's"

Carbon:"I bought 24 regular bullets,28 hollow points, and 60 that need to wear a helmet"

Bolivia:"After the squad died I had to content with the leftovers, the scraps, statically speaking the majority of what remained"

Lewis:"What I need to face is like a toddler with a learning disability, that would be fair"

Carbon:"I took both left eyes of this dead guy "

Carbon:"It took longer to pull out the Esther than it took of kill the general"

Sushiya, while high:"Deeper inside shit got weird, i killed a giant skeleton right? Nothing weird about that, but then his body just kinda danced in place really slowly, I tought speeding up time would fix it, that was a massive fucking mistake, and changing time back to normal was an even bigger mistake, he'll be hunting me until I die, but until then he'll still be dancing"

CAPTAINSAUCE SEGMENT 

Carbon:"They're old, how hard can it be to turn them into blueberry jam and ram them into the grass"

Belize:"I guess if you do electrocute a tank enough it would just explode"

Boliviz:"Id have a better chance of finding a snowball down here than winning a coin toss"

Marc:"How does my Christmas lights break to a stiff breeze but these ones are practically terminators"

Barney one:"I never tought id see the day where I would have to hire a sniper to assassinate a troublesome light bulb but here we are "

Lewis:"I get the feeling if you try to milk a minotaur then you're gonna be its wife"

Sushiya:"In the history of mankind do you think we've ever seen a snake fight an octopus?"

Goverman:"Lets see if you can wobble your way trough the grim reaper" [the grim being carbon]

Goldbob:"Its a steaming pile of something ill tell you that much"

Goverman:"He died? How! Did he have an allergic reaction to the sun?"

Goomb:"Michelangelo is Swiss cheese and where good to go"

Bolivia:"It really looks like I'm taking a sharpened stick to a bazooka fight"

Maria:"HOW DID I GO FROM FIGHTING AN OCTOPUS IN A SUIT TO WW3???"

Princess of peaches, talking about 1TEC-20:"Im playing pictionary with a blind robot"

maria:"Theres on the nose dialogue and then there's punch you in the nose dialogue"

Bolivia,  talking about barney one:"This lady looks like her father was half refrigerator"

IDK"Im supposed to sabotage the mail missile assembly line but it looks like someone got here before me"

Belize?:"And the ghosts of previously murdered pianos???"

Maria:"Im getting outsmarted by puppets"

Bolivia:"After careful deliberation with my associate we've come to the conclusion that the local government must have Removed all quarters from circulation,  the laundromat went under and before you know it the entire society fell into nudism and then anarchy "

Carbon?:"This is like the hunger games of sesame street"

IDK"Im a weird shotgun santa"

Garlic?:"Oh damm! CTHULO IS THICC"

Krump:"What kind of interdimensional time traveling toilet is this?"

Carbon:"Wheater it be cultural appropriation or demonic abomination,  i don't realy care im just gonna try to hit it with a pee bucket" 

Carbon:"THIS IS THE MEDIEVAL RUSSIAN VERSION OF DRIVING INTO BATTLE WITH A TANK BUT SHOOT PEOPLE WITH A BB GUN"

Belize::"I DIDN'T KNOW GRANNY WAS TAKING GRAVEDIGGER TO CHURCH THIS MORNING" 

Goombell:"This isn't a bridge its just the worlds weakest motorcycle trebuchet "

Bolivia:"Oh hellow mr berry"

Carbon:"Giant alien space worm 2020, make America worm poop again"

Bolivia:"When did snuffy[barney one] decide to judas me and join the hobbits?[origamis]"

Lewis:"Theres a surprisingly high amount of chickens in this map and a dramatic lack of eggs"

Bolivia:"Im pretty sure we've sent the first claim to the moon"

Maria:"And yet I'm forced to defend myself from stuff like bloodthirsty scp's using nothing but uncooked t-bone stake, I mean technically its doable but it doesn't make It any less ridiculous"

Barbie:"What's the point of a metal detector if literally everyone here has somekind of cybernetic, like I swear to God If I walk trough here aND you guys start pounding the shit out of me just because I got a couple of extra inches of robo-dong IM GONNA BE PISSED"

Bolivia:"Everyone's wearing slick black suits meanwhile I look like somebody skinned a couch from the 70s"

Sushiya:"Is this bacon flavored weed or weed flavored bacon?"

Sean hampton:"Do you think that Darth Vader ever had to deal with a rebel or a henchmen who was into getting chocked? Like starts force checking them and they tell him to go harder?"

Koopley:"I was stabbed to death by a naked man with a spear and my arm is perpetually running"

Koop kotu:"So I'm crazy enough to be locked behind bars but not crazy enough to think I can fly*

Bolivia:"Usually spooders have 8 arms not 8 abs"

Carbon:"I just bludgeoned Jesus to death with a stick of meat, I'm guessing he's gonna be back in a couple of days he's gonna be looking for me so we'll start running now"

Carbon:"Im done with words, shooty goody time"

Maria?:"Id have a better time cutting down bushes then these strange little robo hobits"

Belize:"Dad this is not the time to be dancing with crabs!"

Maria:"Thats my little brother, who has a fully posable deny devito action figure,I've always been jealous of that one"

Bolivia:"The turns are tabbleling"

Maria, talking about barbie:"She's not exactly the brightest tool at the picnic"

Belize:"Are you kidding me mom? Realy?, you were the one that said you're sick of seeing donkey kongs donkey dong"

Maria:"I have no idea what was in that Wonster energy drink that made him go master roshe style"

Bolivia:"I want to file a complaint against Stacy [belize] for T-posing to assert Dominance over me"

Marc:"Believe it or not dangling a padlock the size of a shoebox from a doorknob does as much work as I want to"

Caesar reality:"You can never have too many rotten floor bananas"

Carbon:"Poisoning your boss is probably not the best way to skip work, but ya boy gotta do what he has to do"

Goverman:"I'll take nicknames of my penis for 300$ alex"

Starvinden?:"I guess we'll just leave you in your special sarcophagus mr tutan-deez-nuts"[browser]

Lewis:"I've been skipping work for 2 weeks now and I'm starting to think that my computer isn't even plugged in"

Bolivia, talking to maria:"Your suit smells like a wet fart and your mouth smells like a ashtray"

Bolivia:"If anyone needs me I'll be on the insane asylum,  why am I caressing a mannequin on top of a boat?"

Carbon:"Would you like to hang yourself or be crucified? Dealers choice!"

Bolivia talking about carbon:"He's doing something ingenious probably diabolical……..or he's dressed as a panda"

Marc:"We should really pay for security around here not only are people breaking in there is also a giant spine breaking chickens"

Maria to Bolivia:"You are very angry at that stake"

Sushiya, after using its products:"I wonder why was I twerking at the office statue"

IDK"WHY IS THERE A GIANT NAKED MAN IN THE LOCKER CHOCKING ME TO DEATH WITH A CHAIN??!!!"

goombell:"I guess we're gonna leave the cookie monster dildo in the locker"

Sean hampton, to Maria:"My love for you is like diarrhea, sometimes I just can't hold it in"

Bolivia:"You're watching me In a Google video platform playing a game from a Google gaming platform that was translated using Google translate, if this isn't a dystopian future I don't know what is"

Bolivia?:"I couldn't have predicted the run after her like a velociraptor made out of pool noodles"

Lewis:"Jumping Jack neighbor help me!"

Bolivia:"Bread! There's no bread,there's your bread! That's a cookie God dammit"

Belize:"So I can be invited to the worlds saddest birthday party"

Maria:"I guess we're playing ring around the Rosie till I lose his dumb ass"

Carbon:"If you see jehovah's witness you tell them to eat shit"

Bolivia:"HOW CAN YOU AFFORD A GUARD BIRD AND NOT A DOOR STOP?"

Bolivia::"For my shopping list I need to find a floppy disk with a s, but for the distraction I could use a floppy dick with sunglasses and a tie"

Carbon:"I really hoped that your little bird bath had a couple inches of water so I could steal a tiny toaster to throw it in with you"

Belize::"Its pretty safe to say Mr voice bad Benjamin good, but we just saw Benjamin talk with the grim reaper and pull around a cart wich is about the size of a child's body"

Goombell:"She may have a crush on the interdimensional death fox"

Maria:"Its like the herpes of craft supplies"

Barney one:"Everyone wants to split checks for keano Reaves, even if they're a 10ft dragon made out of logos and seizures what is going on right now?"

Sushiya, high, again:"When I dilapidated the banana and poked the mayo's brain then had an indept conversation with the strawberry cocoon did bread get arrested? I didn't see the police come by, that would make sense because the alcoholic cat ran away"

Carbon:"IF THEY HAVE AN ASS TO PULL PUNS OUT OF THEY HAVE TO HAVE A BRAIN TO THINK THEM UP"

Goombell:"I think I graduated for the university of food torture"

Well, this is all, took some time but it's here, hope you enjoyed

Frequent reblogers

<《{[(@boom-fanfic-a-latta )]}》>

<《{[( @gumdorp )]}》>

PLEASE REBLOG!

#funny #mario #paper mario #book of mario #bolivia #mary #barbie the bob omb #1000 infernal air sleeves #quotes #captainsauce #mitten squad #paul #goomb #goverman #goombell #carbon

[pub-lius]

What in your opinion makes a good/well written history book? Can you give some examples?

i miiiight have talked about this before like 6 months ago so you might be able to find more info from me on this but idk. to answer this, im just sitting on the floor in front of my bookshelf HEJWBW

So contrary to popular belief, there are just as many factors that go into a non fiction book as a fiction book, and they all have their different styles. to make the comparisons im making, im gonna keep it between Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow, Black Flags, Blue Waters by Eric Jay Dolin, Thomas Jefferson and the Tripoli Pirates by Brian Kilmeade and Don Yaeger, The Three Lives of James Madison by Noah Feldman, and John Laurens and the American Revolution by Gregory D. Massey and George Washington’s Indispensable Men by Arthur S. Lefkowitz, just referring to them by their author(s)’ last name. these are all books i have on hand that ive fully read and annotated

Most history books will be in a biographical or chronological style, where they retell events relating to a person or period in order, and others will take a more narrative style, like what Kilmeade and Yaeger have done, but this is often used to enhance understanding by not constantly referring back to previous events. neither one of this is better or worse, but they open different opportunities for how the author will broach certain subjects.

this is where we get into the author. just like in fiction, the author’s opinions, biases, and preferences alter the way the book is written, mainly because they will highlight certain information that they personally believe is important, and their historical reasoning will reflect their personal biases.

the two authors that i think are most different in this respect are Feldman and Chernow. as we all know, i really don’t like Chernow, for the primary reason that his evidence is contradictory and his theories tend to be misogynistic. the contradictions in his book make it hard to take anything he says at face value and it eliminates all chance of his book being easy to read, along with the fact that he is very wordy.

when it comes to Feldman, his biography of James Madison is a lot shorter than anything Chernow has ever touched with a pen, even though Madison lived a great deal longer than Hamilton. this is because Feldman utilizes brevity more in his writing. the thesis of his book is in the title: that Madison’s life can be broken down into three sections, and he spends the book proving that while also describing his life. this book is therefore more academically reliable, but also easier to read and more trustworthy. he also uses sources for each one of his claims and chernow just pulls things out of his ass but thats neither here nor there.

speaking of sources, when you’re buying a book, flip through the index and see if they have both primary and secondary sources listed. they almost always do, but it’s important to make sure. don’t trust a book with no primary sources. there also should be a LARGE index, like enough that when you separate it from the rest of the book you’re like “oh! i dont have as much to read as i thought i did!” not only does this give you hope that you might have a life outside of this book, it shows that the book has been thoroughly and adequately researched

another factor is how much information is in the book. this has less to do with how long it is and more about the subject matter along with the length. for example, Dolin’s book is about pirates, which are largely very obscure historical figures, so you can infer that the book will be less about the individuals and more about the time period, being the Golden Age of Priacy. and it is! and there’s nothing wrong with that, its just going to give you less information on the individuals.

now when it comes to a book like Massey’s, it seems like an adequate length for a biography of one person. however i think a larger issue with Massey’s book is that he doesn’t give you the full picture of a lot of things, and that is my biggest gripe with this book. he doesn’t give the reader a lot of wiggle room when it comes to making their own theories, because he tends to state his opinion first and give minimal evidence afterwards.

im always on here ranting and raving about how good of a job Lefkowitz did, but he doesn’t really fit the criteria ive mentioned here. his book isn’t in formal writing (which isn’t a requirement but i prefer it), he leaves out a lot of details, and his book is pretty lengthy. however i think he can really be praised for just easiness to read. the truth is, history is boring, and its hard to find authors who don’t make it worse. Lefkowiz’s book is well sourced and well written and does give a really good picture of the time period and a good starting point for further research, and that is how you become my favorite book and my most frequent recommendation

its always gonna depend on your personal preferences and biases. studying history isn’t about getting rid of your biases, and more of using them as a tool or at the very least factoring them into your research. my biggest tip: just keep reading! find what you like and what you don’t bc im still doing that. get nitpicky. get funky with it. GO TO THE LIBRARY‼️

and remember kids, Ron Chernow meets his maker when he encounters me in the Denny’s Parking lot, bare fisted and ready to throw down. you can’t outrun destiny, Ron.

(for legal reasons, that’s a joke)

#history #amrev #books #asks

[anotherhamiltonblog]

Foreign Touch ch 2

Chapter Summary: Thomas needs a favor, but will Adeline give him the chance to ask? What could Thomas want?

Warnings: Once again, I didn’t proofread. Sorry <3 some cute shit, but y’all will see for yourself. HEHE

Word Count: 1,230(Give or take... idk i forgot)

Previously 

Y/N didn’t know why, but she found herself always running from Thomas Jefferson. It wasn’t that she personally had anything against the man, Y/N just didn’t want the unnecessary drama that comes her way because of her brother. Alex was many things, one of those many things was him being a total drama queen. It was quite sad really, that the man would actually bitch and complain to her about Thomas and blah blah blah.

Sighing, Y/N looked at her phone for a few minutes before shoving it back into her pocket. Fixing the strap of her bag over her shoulder, Y/N made her way to the football field where cheer practice was taking place. She had just come tutoring a few kids a grade below her and so Y/N was trying her hardest to try and rush so she wouldn’t be even more late. 

“Y/N! Yo, wait up!” a voice called out to her, turning to see the one and only Thomas Jefferson. Y/N shook her head. 

“No can do! I’m late already. Byeee!” She waved her hands and rushed even faster.

Making it out on the field, glad she changed into her workout clothes before going to tutor, the h/c girl shrugged out of her jacket and threw it down to the ground along with her bag and rushed over to be with the rest of the cheer squad.

“Hamilton! You’re late!” the coach yelled out to her, raising an eyebrow, stopping Y/N from giving an excuse as to why she was late. “Two laps around the field. GO!” 

With a sgh, Y/N started her run. Honestly, she should have seen this coming. Y/N missed the warm-ups and so this was going to be the closest thing to a warm-up she would get. 

Tying up her hair in a tight ponytail as she started out in a slow jog, Y/N pulled off her oversized shirt, so she was wearing just her purple racerback sports bra crop and black leggings. Shirt held tightly in her hand; Y/N was slowly gaining speed as she ran. Focusing on her breathing. Never realizing the football team coming out onto the field as she was in her zone.

It wasn’t till after her run and joining the rest of her squad did Y/N finally see the guys of the team. They were doing their own workout on the other side of the field. 

Catching a certain males eye, Y/N looked away and started on the cheer they had been practicing for a while. 

“Y/N! Top of the pyramid!” “Nicole! Lift her foot higher!” “Brenda! Put your back into those flips!” “Dylan! YOU ALMOST DROPPED Y/N CAREFUL!”

Those were the commands from Coach Stone. By the time 5 o’clock hit, the girls and guys of the cheer squad were out of breath.

“Good job everyone! At this rate we’ll be ready for the first game of the season this Friday!”

With that said, everyone made their way to their things to make their way home after a tough practice. 

“Damn, y’all almost looked like you worked out as hard as us.” a voice caught her attention, making Y/N snap her head up at the source. Only to narrow her eyes.

“Oh please, you and your little buddies couldn’t do what we do if you even tried.” she smirked and shrugged, pulling her shirt over her sweaty body and tugging her jacket over it. The cold wind caused goosebumps to form over her arms.

“Anyways, as awesome as it’s been to talk to you... Oh wait, it hasn’t been awesome. Bye now!” Y/N laughed and grabbed her bag before starting to walk away.

“Yo, Y/N wait up. I need a favor to ask you!” Thomas called out after her, yet as he stepped closer to the girl. His coach called him back to the field.

That just caused Y/N to laugh and make her way to the parking lot where her car was waiting for her. It was Wednesday and all Y/N wanted to do was go home, shower, eat and watch T.V. Seeing as she finished her homework while she was tutoring.

»»-————　♡　————-««

Being in an empty house, freshly showered with only a night gown on and her robe on covering her night wear. Y/N found herself in the kitchen, stirring the pasta sauce she had been making for her dinner. Her parents were out for a date night, Alex was with John. Y/N was glad she could have some down time.

Hearing a ping from her phone, the girl sighed and went to check who was bothering her. Not knowing who the heck the number belonged to that was looking for her.

After seeing who was texting her, Y/N was quick to tell them that she was not the person they were looking for and silenced her phone.

After having her pasta and cleaning up the kitchen. Y/N groaned when she saw that Thomas wouldn’t stop messaging her. Blocking his number, Y/N tossed her phone to the side and wrapped a blanket around her body. Turning on Supernatural on the tv, she cuddled into the blanket and pillow before laying on the couch and watched the show.

It wasn’t much longer that Y/N felt her eyes drop close and she fell asleep.

Laughing and running around, holding a water gun, Y/N ran away from someone. The two laughing and she hid behind a tree.

“THAT’S IT… I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUAL.” Y/N yelled out and smirked at the male before her.

His curly hair was dripping wet, curls perfectly forming around his face as he stood there shirtless. Thomas raised his eyebrow as he eyed her. “A dual?” he asked grinning. Watching as Y/N nodded grinning.

“Mmhm… each of us get a water balloon. Take ten steps from each other. On ten, we turn and throw the water balloon.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

That’s how the two found themselves holding a water balloon. Thomas holding a purple one while Y/N held a green on. Each balloon filled with water.

“One”

“Two”

“Three”

“Four”

“Five”

“Six”

“Seven”

“Eight”

“Nine”

“Ten paces… FIRE!” They yelled and at the same time the two threw the balloon and as if it was all in slow motion. The green balloon hit Thomas right across the face while Y/N managed to dodge the purple one.

“That’s it sweetheart! You’re gonna get it!”

With wide eyes, Y/N dashed off laughing and squealing as she tried to escape Thomas’ hands, sadly for Y/N she fell down and Thomas was on top of her tickling her until she was out of breath.

“You give up?” he asked, laughing as she squirmed underneath him.

“YES! “was all Y/N could respond with in-between her laughter.

When Thomas stopped, he leaned forward, grinning at Y/N until their lips were almost touching. “I win sweetheart…” he whispered, and their lips connected.

Gasping and sitting up, Y/N looked around the dark living room. Wondering where the hell that dream came from and why Jefferson out of all people. Glaring as Dean Winchester was lip-locking with some girl on her screen. Y/N got up from her bed and shut the tv off, muttering under her breath that it was Deans fault for that dream.

Little did she know that a few streets away at the Jefferson household, a certain boy was sitting up on the couch thinking about the dream he just had. Confused as well.

                                                                                                         Next Chapter

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Don’t forget to Like, Reblog and send Feedback! My asks are also opened and so is my IM!

Much love from me to you!!  ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ)

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[keiths3dart]

Max in the Black Lodge: A Life is Strange / Twin Peaks Crossover.

Part 2

Chloe headed through a gap in the trees, panning her flashlight to either side rather than in front of her. It was this that led to her literally walking straight into the man she had completely failed to notice. Chloe's heart froze and her blood ran like ice. Who the fuck could she have run into in the middle of the woods at night other than Max?

Regaining some measure of composure, she pushed herself away from the man, and brought her flashlight to bear on him. The sharp weathered features of a well built, grey haired native american in a Sheriff's department uniform were illuminated.

The man winced as the beam from Chloe's flashlight dazzled him. He put his hand on Chloes and gently but inexorably lowered the light beam from his face. His companion approached, a younger man but still with hair peppered with gray. He too wore the uniform of the Twin Peaks Sheriff's department. It was he who spoke first;

"Hey Hawk, have we found them?".

"I think so Bobby, according to the descriptions i got from Margaret i think this is Chloe"

"What about the other one? Max?".

"We got seperated, have you seen her?" Chloe blurted out, her head swimming. What were the cops doing out here? Why were they looking for them in particular? and how had they managed to find each other in an enormous forest which stretched all the way into Canada?

The older man, deputy Hawk looked concerned. "when did you become separated?" he asked.

Chloe had to think, she and Max had stuck together for most of the hike up into the hills but as the darkness set in, they'd taken slightly different paths around obstacles and before they had known it, they were no longer in sight of each other. It had almost been like the forest itself had gently and insidiously prised them apart and set them on divergent paths.

"I don't know" she stammered, and it was true, when it came down to it she had no idea how long she and Max had been wandering the woods separately.

Hawk looked at her kindly, an experienced woodsman as well as having a lifelong experience of Twin Peaks and its surroundings gave him an understanding of how strange things could get out here in the woods, especially for the unprepared or unwary. He was just glad that he and Bobby had found the first of the two girls without any harm coming to them.

"Bobby, get onto base and let them know we've located Chloe and she's ok. We're gonna continue on to find Max. And Bobby, make sure Lucy gives Margaret a call".

"Right away Hawk" Deputy Bobby Briggs answered and thumbed the transmit key on his radio.

"We took a call from Margaret, the woman you met in the Diner earlier".

"The one with the Log?".

"Lucy, it's Bobby, are you receiving? over".

"Yes, she told us she'd relayed a message to you and that you'd run off into the woods".

"We've located one of the girls, Chloe".

"Later, her log felt that there was something seriously amiss so she called us at the Sheriff's department".

"Yes, that's the one".

"So me and Bobby came to find you, there are hidden darknesses to this place".

"Yeah, this forest has been giving me the creeps for hours".

"No Lucy, i don't think she's a natural blue".

Bobby had raised his eyes to the heavens in exasperation.

"Im worried about Max, what have we got ourselves into?".

"Lucy, just put it on the damn form as 'Dyed', Tell Harry we're proceeding onwards, and get poor Margaret on the horn and let her know what's going on".

"A lot of things happened here a few years ago Chloe, We need to press on but i'll explain as we go."

Deputy Hawk motioned for Chloe to follow him and he began to tell Chloe about the strange history of Twin Peaks. Bobby followed silently to the rear. He had been a high school senior through the entire episode and it had been a tumultuous and traumatic time for him which he didn't feel like contributing to. He was lost in his own thoughts, heading he knew for the very place his own father Air Force Major Garland Briggs had disappeared from never to be seen again.

So Chloe learned that night about this strange town, about Laura Palmer's murder by her father Leland, Leland's own death, the investigations by FBI Agent Dale Cooper, Dale Cooper's own disappearance, reappearance, disappearance again. About Wyndam Earle, about The Black Lodge and "Bob".

Christ and she'd thought Arcadia Bay was fucked up. Why had Rachel and Frank come to this place? (Apart from Norma Jennings' heavenly Cherry Pie) and why had Rachel disappeared again? On top of it all, where was Max? Please God let her be safe, Chloe couldn't even bear to picture being alone again.

The room was neither cold nor warm, and the sounds of soft Jazz permeated the air, the hypnotic shuffle beat having an almost soporific effect on Max. She looked around to take in her surroundings. A second ago she'd been in the woods at night freezing her nipples off in the autumnal chill of North Washington State and now she was.... Well now she was sure she was tripping, she was in a room. The tiled floor was an eye bending zigzag pattern of black and white and the entire space was ringed with heavy crimson drapes. There were few furnishings. 4 easy chairs, a statue and a small table with a bowl in it.

If it had just been the surroundings and the circumstances, then Max might have been able to not freak out. But it was the fact that the room was not empty that made her wonder why she felt so fucking calm. Why everything seemed to happen slowly and calmly and in silence. An almost cloying serenity when her very soul should be clawing at the back of her head before making a bolt for the nearest exit.

Sitting in the chair in front of her, in a dapper red velvet suit was the oddest little man Max had ever seen, his head swaying in time to the music. To his right sat Rachel Amber, silent and unreacting to Max's presence. She simply sat, a benignly neutral expression on her face, looking over at the occupant of the chair opposite to her, on the dwarf's left.

Mark Jefferson.

Similarly oblivious to Max's arrival, he sat looking over at Rachel and Max's stomach churned with hatred for that despicable man, what he'd done to her in the dark room, what he'd done to Kate and those other poor girls he'd groomed then drugged. And how he'd manipulated Nathan into trying the same thing with Rachel with (Prior to Max's temporal intervention) fatal consequences for them both. How he'd killed Chloe, and Nathan, and Victoria and driven Kate to take her own life. But still Max felt like a puppet in somebody else's show. she still stood there just taking this bizarre scene in. The little man began rubbing his hands.

And laughed, the sound strangely distorted, almost reversed in sound, like the backing to one of The Beatles' more psychedelic studio explorations.

"S'TEL KCOR" The little man clapped his hands once.

"I EVAH DOOG SWEN! TAHT MUG UOY EKIL SI GNIOG OT EMOC KCAB NI ELYTS". He motioned his head towards Rachel.

"S'EHS YM NISUOC, TUB T'NSEOD EHS KOOL TSOMLA YLTCAXE EKIL LEHCAR REBMA?".

Max spoke for the first time since her arrival.

"But it is Rachel Amber. Are you Rachel Amber?"

"I LEEF EKIL I WONK REH, TUB SEMITEMOS YM SMRA DNEB KCAB". Rachel appeared pained as she said this.

"S'EHS DELLIF HTIW STERCES, EREHW ER'EW MORF EHT SDRIB GNIS A YTTERP GNOS, DNA S'EREHT SYAWLA CISUM NI EHT RIA".

The little man sprang from his chair as the music in the room began to not so much get louder but simply permeate Max's consciousness more and began to dance. Backwards. Max became lost and hypnotised by the scene, losing all track of time or reality.

Chloe's chest felt like it was on fire, the two policemen were setting a brisk pace through the woods, Hawk darting his eyes this way and that before deciding on a course. Like a hunter on the scent. Bobby had taken up station towards the rear.

"Christ, i'm hella unfit, i really should quit smoking".

"Just a little further Chloe, i think we are close. can you feel it in the air? like static electricity".

"Hawk" Bobby called out sharply, "is that a light off to the left?".

"Max!" Chloe called out as Hawk veered off to the left to investigate the light. No answer. Not even the hooting of the owls. Their damned racket had been driving Chloe nuts but now she missed their reassuringly natural presence. The watchful, expectant silence of the woods worked on her anxiety like a violent catalyst causing it to well up inside her like a tsunami choking, smothering, cloying and overwhelming. She staggered, her head reeling with every conceivable fear her subconscious could throw in front of her eyes. The strong arms of Officer Briggs caught her before she could topple over completely and Chloe allowed herself to be gently guided forward into the little sycamore ringed clearing Hawk had led them to.

The little clearing with the smouldering campfire. Max's discarded flashlight, still on. Max's bag.

But no Max.

#llifeisstrange #life is strange #chloe price #lis #max caulfield #pricefield #rachel amber #life is strange fanfiction #twin peaks #fanfic

[emo--chanel]

me:

my brain: AH OUI OUI MON AMI JE M'APPELLE LAFAYETTE! THE LANCELOT OF THE REVOLUTIONARY SET! I CAME FROM AFAR JUST TO SAY "BONSOIR!" TELL THE KING "CASSE-TOI!" WHO'S THE BEST? C'EST MOI! 😎 I KNOW MY SISTER LIKE I KNOW MY OWN MIND! YOU WILL NEVER FIND ANYONE AS TRUSTING OR AS KIND! "WE HOLD THESE TRUTHS TO BE SELF-EVIDENT THAT ALL MEN ARE CREATED EQUAL" AND WHEN I MEET THOMAS JEFFERSON *GASP!* IMMA COMPEL HIM TO INCLUDE WOMEN IN THE SEQUEL! ✌🏽 WORK! ✊🏽 WE DONT NEED A LEGACY! WE DONT NEED MONEY! YO YO YO YO YO WHAT TIME IS IT? SHOWTIIIME! LOOK AROUND LOOK AROUND AT HOW LUCKY WE ARE TO BE ALIVE RIGHT NOW! HISTORY IS HAPPENIN IN MANHATTAN AND WE JUST HAPPEN TO BE IN THE GREATEST CITY IN THE WORLD! IN THE GREATEST CITY IN THE WOOoOoOoOoOoRLDDD! I IMAGINE DEATH SO MUCH IT FEELS MORE LIKE A MEMORY! THIS WHERE IT GETS ME! WAIT FOR IT! I AM THE ONE THING IN LIFE I CAN CONTROOOL! I AM INIMITABLE! I AM AN ORIGINAALLL! LET'S HAVE ANOTHER ROUND TONIIIGHT! 🥂 RAISE A GLASS TO THE FOUR OF US! TOMORROW THERE'LL BE MORE OF US! ONETWOTHREEFOURFIVESIXSEVENEIGHTNIIINE! IT'S THE TEN DUEL COMMANDMENTS! DADDY DADDY LOOK! MY NAME IS PHILIP! I AM A POET! I WROTE THIS POEM JUST TO SHOW IT! WE ARE OUTGUNNED! OUTMANNED! OUTNUMBERED! OUTPLANNED! WE GOTTA MAKE AN ALL-OUT STAND! YO IM GONNA NEED A RIGHT HAND MAN! CHECK IT - CAN I BE REAL A SECOND? FOR JUST A MILLISECOND? LET MY GUARD DOWN AND TELL THE PEOPLE HOW I FEEL A SECOND? IMMIGRANTS - WE GET THE JOB DONE! 🙏🏽 HERCULES MULLIGAAAN! I NEED NO INTRODUCTION! WHEN YOU KNOCK ME DOWN I GET THE FUCK BACK UP AGAIN! WHY DO YOU ASSUME YOU'RE THE SMARTEST IN THE ROOM? SOON THAT ATTITUDE MAY BE YOUR DOOM! WHY DO YOU WRITE LIKE YOU'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME? WRITE DAY AND NIGHT LIKE YOU'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME? AND WHEN PUSH COMES TO SHOVE! I WILL KILL YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY... TO REMIND YOU OF MY LOVE! 💝 DA DADA DAA DAA DA DADA DA DAA YADA! OOOOO! I DO I DO! I DOOOOO! HEY-EY! OOOOO! I DO I DO! I DOOOOO! BOY YOU GOT ME HELPLESSSS! LOOK INTO YOUR EYES AND THE SKY'S THE LIMIT I'M HELPLESSSS! DOWN FOR THE COUNT AND IM DROWNIN IN EM! I REMEMBER THAT NIGHT I JUST MIGHT REGRET THAT NIGHT FOR THE REST OF MY DAYS! DEATH DOESN'T DISCRIMINATE! BETWEEN THE SINNERS AND THE SAINTS! IT TAKES AND IT TAKES AND IT TAKES! BUT WE KEEP LIVIN ANYWAY! RIIISE UP! WHEN YOU'RE LIVIN ON YOUR KNEES YOU RIIISE UP! ☝🏼☝🏼 SO WHAT'D I MISS? WHAT'D I MISS? VIRGINIA MY HOME SWEET HOME I WANNA GIVE YOU A KISS! 😘 if i could spare his life. if i could trade his life for mine. 🤧 he'd be standing here right now and you would smile and that would be enough! ...they are trying to do the unimaaaginable! 😭 ...it's quiet uptown.. 😭 FORGIVENESS! I HEARD YOU'VE GOT A SPECIAL SOMEONE ON THE SIIIDE, BURR! WHAT ARE YOU TRYIN TO HIIIDE, BURR?! ALEXANDER HAMILTON! MY NAME IS ALEXANDER HAMILTON! I AM NOT THROWING AWAY MY SHOT! HEY YO IM JUST LIKE MY COUNTRY! IM YOUNG SCRAPPY AND HUNGRY! I AM NOT THROWING AWAY MY SHOT! 😏 HEY 😏 HEY 😏 HEY! DADDY SAID TO BE HOME BY SUNDOWN! DADDY DOESNT NEED TO KNOOW! DADDY SAID NOT TO GO DOWNTOWN! LIKE I SAID YOU'RE FREE TO GOOO! MR LAFAYETTE HARD ROCK LIKE LANCELOT! I THINK YOUR PANTS LOOK HOT! LAURENS I LIKE YOU A LOT! NEVER GON' BE PRESIDENT NOW! NEVER GON' BE PRESIDENT NOW! "DO WHATEVER YOU WANT IM SUPER DEAD!" HERE COMES THE GENERAAAL! ALriGHt aLRiGhT tHaT's WhAt I'M tALkiN aBoUt!!!! 😆

local telepaths: what the fuck.....

#im in deep my friends #hamilton #hamilton musical #hamilton broadway #me #long post

[hitchell-mope]

(Third film. After “who I am”. Mal Hades and Uma freeze for a moment. The gravity of their bonding moment sinking in. Then they burst out laughing. And they’re only stopped by Harry flying through the closed french windows and crashing into the gazebo)

Ben: sorry. My bad. He encroached on my personal space

Harriet: he walked past you

Ben: he walked past behind me.

Harriet: so the fuck what?

Mal: Ben’s got a fight or flight response when it comes to the gnome.

Gil: it’s what happens when you do what Harry did to him

Cj: which is what exactly?

Ben: kidnapping me, trying to sell Gil to me, attempted to kill me and was accessory to the almost capsizing of the cotillion yacht that me and all my friends were on

Cj: that is barely worth mentioning and in any

Evie: Ok everyone shut up I need to talk to the happy couple

Harry: I think my legs are broked

Evie: no one cares flapjack face. Ben. Mal. Join me at the kitchen island

Mal: you wanna tell her or shall I?

Ben: umm. Me? (Mal gives him the go ahead). Um. Evie. Uh. Heheh. We sort of decided on most of the um important stuff so you don’t have to plan. You just have organise

Evie: and the four things?

Mal: I can create my new dress with magic. I’m going to ask my mom if I can borrow a necklace. I’ve got the class ring Ben gave me. And I can redo the hair streaks my exposure to the ember made for the ceremony. Sorted

Evie (through a forced, fixed smile): so I’m utterly superfluous

Carlos: pretty much yeah.

Jay: c’mon E. this is probably gonna be the first royal wedding in history where the couple have their heads on screwed on right

Evie: mhmm mhmm yeah yes of that is true however HOWEVER there’s the little slight wrinkle of me being all but shut out from the proceedings

Mal: you’re still in the party. After Jane - oh shit Jane! - and Evie’s fainted. Doug, buddy, could you alert me when she wakes up. I gotta go talk with the guest of honour

(She bustles over your Jane who’s just outside and nursing a large glass)

Mal: hey bud

Jane (slightly glazed look in her eye): heya Mally. How’re hic you doin?

Mal: I actually came over to see how you were doing. I got wrapped in my own drama again. I’m sorry

Jane: ah don’t be. I’ve come to expect. Nothings about me. Never. Not even my own birthdays. You know in my four teeth I got ‘tention?

Mal: no

Jane: Chas copied off me in algebra. Ma thought I cheated. Registration thingumy. Him fore I. So I spent that afternoon clapping erasers. So see. Never bout me

Mal: ah. Well this was supposed to be about you. And I’ve shirked you to a corner drinking....

Jane: 🎶colada’🎶

Mal: right. Judging your countenance I’d say not a virgin one. How many have you had?

Jane: one. About eighty, eighty eight times? I think. Might be more

Mal: I see. Wanna stitck by me for the evening?

Jane (pouty): will you show off those sceptre tricks you’ve been working on?

Mal (chuckling): if you want

Hades (from the kitchen): Mal! Evie is awake and demanding your presence

Evie: I refuse to be shut out!

Mal: (long, long sigh) I am so sorry Jane. Let me try and make things better.

(She points her finger at the ground and Hadie materialises in a plume of green smoke. He’s trying a hat on)

Hadie: strange, I could’ve sworn there was a mirror there

Mal: what in dad’s name are you wearing?

Hadie: oh. Doug said I should get changed. Lovely guy by the way. Evie chose well. Dizzy took me upstairs to the changing rooms. And I saw a large picture as I passed her room. He was wearing this precise outfit. So I replicated the look and was just fixing the hat when you summoned me. You like?

Mal (very calm): Jefferson. Please tell me you replicated the look and not replaced it. All three of them will kill me if that posters wearing a bathrobe

Hadie: (beat) ok. NOW it’s replicated

Mal: good. Now could you please do me a favour and keep an eye on Jane? Birthday girl shouldn’t be left alone

Hadie: it’d be my pleasure

Mal: great thanks. I gotta go

Jane: he’s tall. Er then me

(Mal goes back into the house and heads towards Evie)

Mal: what is it now?

Evie: you just can’t keep me out of your wedding planning. I’m the WEDDING PLANNER

Ben: we’re not keeping you out E. We’re just shutting down the ideas we don’t like

Evie: you’re not even supposed to be part of the conversation! You’re the groom you’re only job is to show up sober

Mal: really? Well that scuppers my plans to be blitzed during the ceremony

Evie: oh here we go...

(As they continue arguing Uma heaves a long suffering sigh and goes outside, Lonnie goes over to check up on Gil who’s eyes are scrunched shut with his hands over his ears)

Lonnie: you ok

Gil: I don’t like it when my friends fight

Lonnie: I know. Hey jay. Could you help us out here please?

Jay: sure. Hmmm. Ooh. I know. To get rid of these ants in their pants/I command thee all to get up and dance.

(Some music starts up and everyone freezes)

Jay (taking Gil’s hands away from his ears): at your leisure qayidi 'aw rbany

(This is when “backflip” happens. After the song the spells breaks)

Evie: what happened?

Lonnie: you three were arguing, Gil got upset so Jay broke the argument up and we all danced

Mal: sorry bud

Ben: sorry bro

Evie: yeah sorry

Gil: s’ok

Evie: what were we arguing about?

Mal: beats me

Ben: ditto

Cj: I know

Jay: no ya don’t

Cj: ....uhhhh....OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED TO HARRY!

Ben (much more then dismissively): eh he’ll be fine. Where’s Uma?

Elsa (refreezing the now lukewarm beer): she headed back outside Benjamin

Ben: ohhhh yeah uhhhh heheh you mind?

Mal: nah, go ahead. Do what you gotta do

Ben: thank you

(Outside Uma’s ranting and raving about how Mal “always wins” and how she “always loses” but she stops when Ben approaches her)

Uma: ohhhh What do you want?

Ben: talk?

Uma: oh yeah? What about?

Ben: uh, you?

Uma: why? I could see you lot in there perfectly happy, dancing about, not a care in the damn world, you and your FUCKING FRIVOLITY!!!!

Ben: ohhhh riiiight yeah I understand now, can’t be easy. Worlds in tatters, your entire life perceptions been upended, you think you’ve got on the same page with some of your family then you see your cousins arguing about wedding planning so you don’t think they’re taking things seriously. Completely understandable

Uma:...yeah I’m a little tipsy so you’re gonna have to slow down

Ben: you think you patched things up with Mal then you turn around and she’s not focusing on what you deem necessary

Uma: I’m not gonna “patch things up” until she admits and pays for what she did to me

Ben: what more can she do though? I mean seriously. She apologised, tried to let you kill her and she’s protected celia throughout most of today. Most things are a two way street Uma. And it’s up to you wether you accept her apology or not. No one can but you

Uma: I...don’t...KNOW. I DUNNO! GOD! I can’t stand it! She gets everything! The title, the reverence, the power, immortality! This past year I’ve been in my own personal hell while she’s been over here swanning about and owning the whole fucking place! It’s not fair that she gets all this and I get pruny hands and a barnaclised first mate!

Ben: have you told Mal this?

Uma: what? And be vulnerable towards the cow? I thought you were smart

Ben: (chuckles) m’sorry. Shouldn’t laugh

Uma (scoffing): s’alright. It’s pathetic. I’m pathetic. But I can’t help it. Cause when she’s been here, I’ve been down there. With my oh so delightful mother. And yeah I know it’s stupid. I can’t let it go. I’m not ice bitch. The sea waits and it will have its revenge! I’mramblingaren’tI?

Ben: mhmm. But that’s ok. You deserve it. Honestly every vk on this property has a right to complain and then some.

Uma: im done. You can go

Ben: before I do can I give you my thoughts quick?

Uma: whatever

Ben: I can help you. Believe me. All I want to do is help. But you kidnapped me. You tortured me. You tried to kill me. Why? To stick it to Mal? To make yourself feel better. All you had to do was ask and I would’ve listened to you. I will in fact still listen to you. I want to be friends with you but you need to let this petty vendetta go. It won’t do anyone any good to dwell on the past. I only hope you understand that

Uma: petty? Me? Petty?

Ben: mhmm.

Uma: bitch!

Ben: oh please. Everyone has a fatal flaw. I, apparently, have a tendency to be a smidge naive

Uma (utterly deadpan): really? I never would’ve believed it.

Ben: are you sure you can’t see yourself one day letting what happened go?

Uma: nope

Ben: why not?

Uma: cause it feels right. Evening the score feels right. And frankly I don’t care what you think. It’s simple as that. I don’t care

(This is when “I’ve gotta be me” happens)

#disney descendants #zendaya!mal