#listen I know it’s questionable | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

paxny · 4 months

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I am very late to this, but I just found out about Tom Cruise’s Cake List today.

………

I want to try that cake SO. BAD.

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maalidoesart · 4 months

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themmmm

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bread-that-draws · 1 year

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Flowey’s so funny and has me so fucked up like he’s a talking flower. He tries to kill you upon your first interaction. He is ten years old. He is damaged beyond repair. He’s a flower named Flowey. He’s become friends with every single character. He’s killed all of them countless times. He knows everything about everyone. He doesn’t care anymore. He takes care of his mom when she can’t take care of herself. He’s killed her before. He doesn’t care if you kill her. He thinks she’s trying to replace him. He just wants to be himself again. He wants to destroy everything. He hates you. You’re the only one who understands him. He wants his best friend back. He’s terrified of them. He believes in kill or be killed because he died by giving mercy to the wrong person. He believes himself to be the wrong person. He doesn’t understand when you show him that kindness he showed others, even when you know he could kill you for it. He’s tried every route. He asks you if you have anything better to do when you try to do the same. He’s a direct reflection of the player. He’s a fucking talking flower named flowey and his only voice line is by Ronald McDonald and his officially licensed plush does a little dance for you

#‘Flowey would listen to i bet on losing dogs by Mitski and cry until he throws up and Chara calls him cringe from beyond the grave’#-me to my friend when I ranted about this last night #he has me so fucked up like oh my god #how is the best character a fucking talking flower #I love undertale’s writing so much like it’s mastered minimal evidence giving away the biggest parts of characters #i can analyze him i can study him under a microscope #i can put him in a terrarium with a sticky note that says gay baby jail you know #he has me SO fucked up #flowey #flowey the flower #asriel #asriel dreemurr #I’m talking about flowey btw not asriel i know they’re the same person but not to me #like how i consider little baby me and fucked up 13 year old me different people #asriel sits on the playground and cries when nobody wants to play warrior cats with him #and flowey sits in the back of classrooms and answers ‘life is MEANINGLESS’ to every question #not speaking from experience ofc (im lying)#love my edgy flower *puts a magnifying glass up to him and notes how fucked up he is*#i think more characters need to be fucked up beyond repair #undertale #utdr #character analysis

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buff-muffin · 3 months

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There’s a pretty common ASL brothers headcanon that Sabo teaches his brothers things like reading and writing among other things and I do think this is true to a degree. Like of course the bandits taught Ace the basics but you know little Ace and his whole “raaaa don’t tell me what to do. If I stay out of the house I can’t be a bother to you” mindset. And I certainly think Makino and the Mayor TRIED to teach Luffy but he only has a grip on bare basics. So Sabo had to teach more complicated things like grammar, multiplication, division and other things.

And honestly I could see him being a pretty good teacher. He knows how his brothers brains work and how to phrase questions for them so that they would understand. And considering Ace and Sabo had known each other for years by this point I could imagine Ace is use to Sabo being a teacher.

But Sabo as Luffy’s teacher is a little different. Because Sabo watches Luffy struggle with so many things he did when he was little. Phonetic spelling, contractions, fractions even simple things like buttoning up his own shirt are hard for Luffy. And while Ace is quick to call him stupid because it’s easy don’t be a baby. Sabo is patient with him because his own parents never were. He buttons Luffy’s shirts in the winter when he struggles, he sounds out store signs for him and break down maths questions to the point of rocks for Luffy to count. While I doubt Luffy was ever fond of class time, he was almost always met with patience helping him to learn

When Sabo left, Ace would not coddle him the same Sabo did even if he tried to and that Winter after Sabo’s death Luffy learned to button his own shirt and was so proud. He chose to leave Dawn in a button up vest as if to prove to Sabo he was grown enough to survive on his own and he didn’t need to worry.

#asl brothers #monkey d. luffy #portgas d ace #one piece sabo #revolutionary sabo #if there are any spelling or grammar mistakes suck my digital dick #one piece #rambles #re watching it there are so many moments that sabo is kinder to Luffy #like asking questions listening. he probably doesn’t care as much but he makes sure Luffy knows he’s loved #both brothers work on giving Luffy what they didn’t have so he could achieve #AUGHHHH #I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

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tinyavenuesailor · 1 year

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Crack Fic! Where Everyone thinks Merlin is the reasonable one.

Everyone loves Merlin and thinks he’s the sweetest person, who couldn’t hurt a fly. So, they’re all annoyed when they see how Arthur treats him. The King is constantly overloading his manservant with work, ordering him to do massive tasks and coming up with ridiculous excuses to keep Merlin from taking a break. So, the knights and others constantly try to find ways to pull Merlin away from Arthur’s side and give him a break but Arthur always finds a way to mess up their plans.

Gwen and the other maids sometimes try to help Merlin with his chores

Gwen: Arthur you can’t actually expect Merlin to clean the entire throne room by himself

Arthur: *shrugs* Yes. I’m hardly asking him much

Gwen: It usually takes five maids to thoroughly clean the throne room. It’s ridiculous to ask one person to do so much work and then, to place Lancelot as a guard to make sure none of us can help him.

Arthur: Lancelot wouldn’t have to guard anything if you all weren’t so ready to disobey my orders. I said Merlin will clean the throne room ALONE and that is final

Gwen: I never knew you could be such a cruel person and to Merlin of all people

*Gwen storms off*

Gwaine, Leon, Percival, Elyan and some of the other knights try to steal Merlin away to the tavern to relax

Gwaine: Come on Princess. I’m sure you can survive one night without Merlin

*Gwaine tries to pull Merlin to their side but Arthur grabs hold of Merlin and pulls him back*

Arthur: Need I remind you, Merlin is my manservant and doesn’t have time to play around. He still has very important duties to complete

Elyan: What could he possibly have to do at this time? Most servants have gone home for the day?

Arthur: Well Merlin is the King’s manservant as I keep reminding you and still have very important things to do

Gwaine: Like what?

Arthur: *pauses* For one, he needs to clean the mess he made in the closet

The knights: *trying to process the bullshit Arthur just told them*

Arthur: *crossing his arms, 100% serious, daring them to challenge him*

Merlin: It’s fine guys really, probably next time *pulling Arthur and himself back into Arthur’s chambers and locking the door*

Or when something terrible happens to Merlin like the time he got kidnapped and everyone went into full panic

Arthur: *staring hard at Lance* Merlin’s been kidnapped?

Elyan: They ambushed us out of nowhere and before we knew it they were off with him.

Leon: Don’t worry sire, I’ll gather a search party immediately to have him found.

Gwaine: We’ll make them sorry they ever thought to mess with our Merlin

Arthur: *holding up a finger and turning to Lance again* Merlin’s been kidnapped?

Lance: ..... That is the story

Gwaine: Princess, have you not been listening. We need to hurry every second counts.

Arthur: I heard, just wondering why he couldn’t have chosen a better day to get himself kidnapped

*Everyone gawks at Arthur in disbelief*

Basically, everyone thinks that Arthur doesn’t appreciate Merlin and that their cinnamon roll deserves better and formed a protection squad to help Merlin get the treatment he deserves.

Meanwhile in Reality....

Arthur knows about Merlin’s magic. He is fully aware of how powerful Merlin is and finally sees that his manservant isn’t an idiot. He’s just a bloody madman.

===In the throne room===

*Arthur and Merlin both staring at a dark purple swirling vortex on the floor*

Arthur: *takes a deep breath* Merlin, why is there a hole in my throne room?

Merlin: Well, it's not a hole. It’s a sort of gateway to the dark dimension.

Arthur: Oh, okay. Why is there a gateway to the dark dimension in my throne room?

Merlin: ..... I can fix it

Lancelot: Arthur, I heard you- *looks down at the menacing purple gateway on the floor and then back to Arthur and Merlin*

Lancelot: Should I go guard the door?

===After Gwaine, Elyan and Percival tried to take Merlin out for drinks===

Merlin: You know we both could use a break. I am a bit hungry. Been a while since I had a drink too

Arthur: Well maybe, we can join them after you explain why my Uncle is tied up in my closet

*Arthur opens his closet doors revealing a tied-up and gagged Agravaine making muffled noise*

Merlin: You told me to get evidence that he was working with Morgana

Arthur: And your solution to that was to kidnap him?

Merlin: What better way to hear it than from the man himself?

Arthur: What’s going to happen when people realize he’s missing

Merlin: Don’t worry, one memory wipe spell and he’ll be back tomorrow in his chambers like nothing ever happened

Arthur: You told me those spells were dangerous

Merlin: *laughs* Well, yeah, I’m not using it on us

Agravaine: *making muffled and panicked pleads to Arthur*

Lancelot: Sorry, Arthur, Gaius told me that Merlin needed m- *sees a tied-up Agravaine*

Lancelot: *nods* I’ll go stand guard

=== Arthur, the first to find Merlin after his “kidnapping” ===

Arthur: *folds his arms and looks behind his manservant to see a trail of bodies* Kidnapped?

Merlin: Well they did try to kidnap me. I just decided not to resist.

Arthur: *sighs* Is everyone dead?

Merlin: I was supposed to leave someone alive?

Arthur: *rolls his eyes* Come before I have to explain how my “innocent”, “weak” manservant took out a group of mercenaries.

Lancelot: *already standing guard*

#merlin bbc #merthur #merlin #Arthur Pendragon #chaotic merlin #arthur knows #and he's the reasonable one #featuring doesn't ask questions but always completes the mission lancelot #arthur having to listen to someone complain that he needs to be more considerate of Merlin for the fourth time that week #While he watches Merlin and Lancelot in the background carry around a bag the size of a human body #Arthur: Sorry to interrupt you but I suddenly need to go check on my uncle to check if he's still breathing

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callisteios · 5 months

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I have a new uquiz for you, go on a pilgrimage with me. discover who you are.

#don't you want to go on a nice medieval pilgrimage?#don't you want to rest a little? answer some questions? learn something about yourself?#this was originally a pentiment medieval quiz and now it's this #it's pretty good imo though. i had a lot of fun researching it #yes there really is a biblio. ill write it up soon but its parts of the pentiment biblio plus some stuff i found myself #really thank you to everyone who made pentiment. you know how sometimes you find a piece of art at exactly the right time?#well i discovered pentiment just as my interests perfectly intersected with it. (those interests being history historiography and grief)#have fun etc. tag your results #that's always great #quiz #uquiz #pentiment #medieval #mine #sorry for being absent for a bit. holidays kind of suck #sorry abbie i couldnt fit the saw bathroom in thisone. i couldn't think of a way to do it naturally #i listened to SAVED! and SINNER GET READY the entire time i was writing this so yeah there's a ref. sue me

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shima-draws · 8 months

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Tell us about the AU! I know you want to!!

WAUGHHH. AGHHH. OKAY. OKAY SO. I've been watching one of my favorite content creators play through the DLC. Early on in the playthrough he was tossing around theories and said "Maybe KIERAN is Ogerpon??" and that gave me a BRILLIANT THOUGHT.

Ogerpon Kieran AU.......

I've already thought of a very long and complex backstory for this LOL but to simplify it. Before the ogre and its human companion came to Kitakami, said companion was actually living a very happy life with his child. However, they were caught up in the midst of a great war that ended up taking the child's life. The man was so overcome with grief that it summoned a great being (I'm thinking Xerneas), who blessed his dead child with new life. And that child was reborn as Ogerpon!! So kinda like how children who get lost in the woods and die are reborn as Phantump.

Fast forward to many many years later. A long chain of events leads to Carmine's grandfather's...father (so, her great-grandpa?) meeting Ogerpon and vowing to make it a new mask, a mystical and powerful mask that could grant wishes. Sadly, Carmine's great-grandpa wasn't able to complete the mask before he died. This project was eventually picked up by Carmine's father (and I have a whole other thing about him but I'm not gonna get into it right now lol). Carmine's father forms a very close bond with Ogerpon as he continues to gather materials to finish the wish mask. He expresses his desire for Ogerpon to finally be able to walk among the villagers with its name cleared, and for Ogerpon to meet his only daughter. He leaves for a journey to find the last material for the mask...and never returns 😔

Carmine's grandfather has a whole complex about the wish mask, but after seeing both his father and his son dedicate so much time and care into completing it, he takes the last material, imbued with the hopes and dreams of his family, and finally finishes the mask. When he presents it to Ogerpon, Ogerpon dons the mask and its wish is granted...it becomes human :") So it becomes Kieran, basically!! Kieran's wish was to be able to say thank you to all of the generations of mask makers that had helped him, and. To be part of their family 🥺 What he doesn't know is that his wish to be human stems from the fact that he already was human, once. But he doesn't remember his life before he was reborn as a Pokemon.

So, Carmine's grandfather happily accepts Kieran and his desire, and takes him home to live with him and Carmine. Note that Kieran is probably around 5-6 at the time, so he's BABY. And Carmine is only about a year or two older. She isn't sure what to think about suddenly getting a new brother, but she's happy to have someone to boss around lmao.

And once a year, during the festival of masks, Kieran lets his facade fall and wanders around as Ogerpon again. Just to keep in touch with his roots haha

So obviously with Kieran being Ogerpon the events of the DLC will play out differently than canon. Kieran slyly compliments the ogre in front of the player and mentions that maybe it's just misunderstood. He's been trying for a while to change the villagers' minds about what happened to him and the Loyal Three all those years ago, but it hasn't been going...too well lol. So when the player shows up, and things start to shift, Kieran gets really excited bc he realizes he finally might be able to clear his name :")

Is this AU silly and dumb as hell? Yes. Does it not really make sense with canon and is full of plot holes? Yes. Am I brainrotting over it anyway? Also yes.

Take a little edit I did of Kieran's official art to fit what I had in mind for the AU ;) I wanted to draw it but I'm at work rn lmao RIP

ALSO LITTLE DOODLE OF THE BOY

ALSO bc of Ogerpon's original gender Kieran probably goes by he/they pronouns in the AU

#Listen I know this AU is stupid as hell but it means SO much to me #Shima answers questions #Pokemon #The Teal Mask #Pokemon Kieran #Pokemon Carmine #Ogerpon #Kieranpon AU #Shima's AUs #I'm brainrotting SO hard. HELP #Long post

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mayasaura · 1 year

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I think the best possible time travel fic would be to slingshot Harrow from the end of Harrow the Ninth back to the beginning of Gideon the Ninth. Highest hilarity potential, highest angst potential, highest pining potential

Things Harrow knows now that she didn't before:

Who Alecto was

The names of God and his lyctors

The secret of lyctorhood

That the lyctor trials are a death trap

Gideon could be easily persuaded to die for her

Gideon dying for her is the worst thing possible

She would do almost anything to prevent Gideon from dying

Gideon's sword is haunted by a very angry and oddly familiar-looking woman who bears a remarkable resemblance to Gideon

Things Harrow still doesn't know:

What Alecto is

Gideon's parentage

Jackshit about BOE

Mercy and Augustine are both traitors

Things Harrow knew then and still knows now:

Gideon—this Gideon here and now—hates her

She owes a debt of two hundred lives and a future to the Ninth

The survival of the Ninth depends on her becoming a lyctor

#like. what does she DO??#Gideon isn't going to listen to her without some MAJOR legwork to win her trust #she doesn't even know how she did it last time and she can't afford to wait until canaan house to replicate the successful scenarios #should she even bring Gideon with her this time?#what are her alternatives?#let Gideon go to join the Cohort and die gloriously for the empire?#leave her here on the Ninth alone with Crux who wants her dead and has killed before?#should she even go herself?#stupid question she owes it to Pent and Quinn and the Sixth and everyone who risked their souls for her #most of all tho #I really really wanna make pre-canaan house Gideon have to deal with Harrow in her 'first flower of my House' 'saving the last dance' era #like. harrow basically got snatched by a pod-person who cares about strangers and looks at Gideon like a dream she expects to dissolve #gideon would lose her MIND #the locked tomb #gideon nav #harrow nonagesimus #harrowhark nonagesimus #gideon the ninth #harrow the ninth #htn spoilers #time travel #peggy sue fic #op

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notbecauseofvictories · 21 days

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Longtime follower and I love seeing your insights, so wondered if you had thoughts or advice on this:

I live alone and I'm not in a relationship, though I do date. I'd say ninety percent of the time I really enjoy my life, seven percent I'm a bit sad or annoyed about not having a partner yet, and three percent I get tossed into the Pit of Despair. That three percent can be tied into hormonal cycles, bad timing, etc - even when I know the cause, it still needs to be lived through. Has that happened with you? If so, how do you manage it? I do okay, but it feels like I could do better.

Ah, but the Pit of Despair and I are best friends now. I've sent pictures from the Pit, all featuring me with an absolutely humorless, rictus grin, which does make me wonder why no one else has noticed yet. I have a timeshare in the Pit of Despair. I spend some time there every six months or so, standing in the middle of my impossibly overgrown, dingy garden, and thinking to myself, how did I get here? how do I get out?

And then, as though endurance isn't enough...then your timeshare in the Pit ends. You emerge in the daylight and immediately forget how grey and hopeless that garden was, the weirdly stained, collapsing furniture in the corner and the crooked yellowing plants and that mean laughter you could sometimes hear over the sounds of waving grass. You think to yourself: that will never happen again! I am free! I am cured!

(This will feel so much worse, the next time you're shoved back into the stupid garden.)

That said, I don't think you're going to like my answer to your next question. This is because I don't like my answer; unfortunately, it remains the only answer I have to this question.

I think having some unsettled sorrow, just a touch of existential despair, is the best we can hope to do in this life.

I think that with both rueful humor and deep, deep disgust, which is typically the combo I bring to musings about being a person. Of course it's a little funny---look at the monkey, it's got anxiety!---and of course it's also frustrating, unspeakable outside of bitter cursing, a problem that will not be fixed because quite frankly it's built too deeply into us to be cut out cleanly and thrown away.

(Look at the fucking monkey, you can tell yourself through gritted teeth, standing in that horrible garden with weeks of dirty dishes in the sink and an inbox of emails and friends blowing up your phone with plans you hate to even think about. It's got anxiety.)

I do not have a cure for this. I manage it with the same sort of humor and ruefulness and bitterness that I mentioned above---I don't beat myself up anymore, when I realize I'm standing in the horrible garden again. I know it too well. Sometimes it has an okay wifi connection? I watch some movies. I get done what I can, and forgive myself the rest. I have been here before; I will get out again. I just need to be patient.

Once I'm out, there will be a whole world, I know there will---full of music I haven't heard before and stories that won't make me cringe and emails I will respond to with ease and conversations where I can be light, amusing even. There is a world beyond the Pit. There is always a world beyond the Pit, I just can't find my way back sometimes.

In the meantime, I take another terrible picture in front of the stained furniture, and caption it "Hello from the Pit!!!" with a bunch of exclamation points to indicate that it's a joke, even though it isn't.

I wait.

#there is no experience of being human without suffering. even the most blessed happy person you know suffers.#so the question becomes: how do you fit suffering inside of you. how do you deal with it.#I sit in a horrible garden and pretend not to listen to the weird disembodied laughter #knowing that this too shall pass.#it will suck in the interim! but it will pass.#sarah gives advice

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gifti3 · 10 months

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well...

congrats to lucifer's overwhelming "win"!

#it was a luci sweep #listen i thought it would be more even cause “two most popular” u know?#(and i was gonna do malleus vs lucifer originally but knew hed get smeared across the pavement and switched to mammon to be more fair)#but i underestimated how much people love mams #so lucifer got demolished in a day #so are yall impressed by my gif making skills.#...okay its not my strongest suit!#obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me lucifer #om lucifer #obey me mc #death note #i wanted to doodle asmo as misa misa and satan as L but didnt have the time #maybe in the future if i remember #okay ive run out of poll questions so imma slow down on all the drawing before i tire myself out lol #lucifer: do you have any favorites?#mc: of course not! i love everyone equally #mc once lucifer is out of earshot: *grabs mammon* it's you and by A LOT #my art

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layzeal · 5 months

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actually i think we don't talk enough about how insane it is that xue yang was controlling song lan's undead body while his spirit was entirely aware of it but unable to stop it

#he spoke sizhui...........#he answered truthfully.........#he knew what was being done to him #and for the first time in years someone was able to listen #though still frustrating in a way because imagine finally being able to speak #while you know these poor children are in danger #but only being capable of answering things you were specifically questioned #truly “i have no mouth and i must scream” type of vibe #modao #mdzs #lace speaks

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ghost-bxrd · 2 months

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(Don't know if this was asked already but)

What are the Titan's first reaction to Dick calling to them in owl hoots?

And what's their reaction to Batman answering Dick the same way?

At first he wouldn’t make any birds sounds around them at all, opting to wear contacts and talk as little as possible.

The first time they witness the bird sounds would probably be in response to Robin hijacking the comms after Dick didn’t check in with him at the alotted time, suddenly Nightwing is just standing off to the side, hooting and chirping softly in the the comms.

The titans are definitely confused because??? They thought Nightwing was human???? But apparently the name means something after all so whatever. If they can have an alien on the team then a bird-man-whatever is nothing. And Dick, upon seeing that they really don’t care at all, starts making bird sounds more frequently around them. And the Titans likewise learn to interpret some of the sounds (“look!” Is a sharp hoot, “stop!” a chittering hiss, and “nice-move-but-I’m-going-to-show-you-where-it-really-hurts-now” is an amused little chirrup).

The real surprise is Batman and Robin responding to Nightwing with the same sort of bird sounds and it takes them a good moment to realize that—- yep, “tall-dark-and-scary” just hooted at him like an owl. And now, apparently he’s not mocking him because Nightwing appears very happy about it and Robin also makes those weird little cheeps and trills that genuinely don’t sound like they should be coming from a human throat at all and—-

Yep, now Nightwing is??? Cuddling Robin???? Is that a thing?????? And making the softest bird noises yet?????? (One of the Titans definitely tries approaching them but the dead stare Dick gives them makes them backtrack very quickly. The message is clear: no approaching Robin.)

((Jason meanwhile jabs Dick in the ribs hard and pointedly makes his way over to the Titans to cheerfully say hello and let them know that if anything happens to Nightwing on their watch, he’s going to become their worst nightmare. The Titans are reluctantly impressed but also very much aware that Nightwing is still giving them that eerily blank stare that promises a world of pain if anybody even thinks about harming a hair on Robin’s head. Like they ever would. Batman’s wrath alone wouldn’t be worth it, but now they’re starting to see that Nightwing might be even scarier than him.

Wally eventually takes one for the team and introduces himself to Jason, offering to share some silly stories about Nightwing from their last mission and eat ice cream.The speedster is the first Titan to get his individual bird call.))

The Titans obviously aren’t going to question Batman hooting at Nightwing (no way, they value their skeletal integrity thank you very much) but that day, many wild rumors and speculations about Batman are born, some them gaining enough attention that JLA hear of them.

None of them want to ask, but the running bet is either that the Batfamily are all metas with bird characteristics (“It explains how they can stomach swinging through the city like that Roy! They’re meant to have wings, but now they have to compensate!”), or that they’re secretly some kind of eldritch entities that embody all the weirdness of Gotham City (“No Donna, think about it, it makes sense! Remember all those random owl statues and carvings around the city? They’re literally an embodiment of that cursed place!”)

#theories are going wild #Nightwing never confirms nor denies #but he has a fun time listening to them fumbling about in the dark #they never do find out about his talon past #well maybe Wally does #who knows #Batman likewise never admits to anything #and any questions in that regard are answered with a blank bat stare #Robin is a gleeful little shit who makes more bird sounds around the JLA than Dick does #nobody knows the batfam’s civilian identity #Oliver would probably drop dead of shock if he knew Brucie Wayne was Batman #did I mention they’ve known each other sicne childhood in owl song?#hm well I have now #Brucie and Oliver are childhood somethings #owl song

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inkskinned · 2 years

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not to romanticize my mental issues but sometimes having adhd is very useful because today during a meeting that could have been an email i kept thinking about crabs wearing small tophats and having little dancing parties and how they'd sound in tap shoes.

and when my boss was like "raquel what do you think?"

i was like "well, i think the others have made good points about this, of course, and i'd be happy to circle around later on it, but i'd love to take a moment and resonate with this before offering my own suggestion. i want to hear what others think before anticipating the client's needs."

and then i went back to not listening but this time it was imagining snails that joust.