#obviously at that point it was fanart for book one but she do keep being weird in rivers

[layaart]

priya in the oleander sword ✨🌿

#the jasmine throne #the oleander sword #burning kingdoms #tasha suri #book fanart #bookish art #books #i started this.....last october LMAO #obviously at that point it was fanart for book one but she do keep being weird in rivers #also i guess this is kinda spoilery but like. not as majorly as you might think idk #2022 fanart

[beargyufairy]

Just My Thoughts Pt. 32

For Natsu, there isn’t much I have expectations for since he has been the main focus of the entire series. I want him to have a good fight with Ignia with some tension, trauma, and loss. I want END to have some kind of return either because Natsu goes feral from seeing his friends hurt (particularly Lucy) or he consumes Ignia’s flames and goes berserk again. I really need END to come back to its fullest point with scales, claws, maybe horns and wings. The actual design fell short to me compared to all the fanart and that really disappointed me. There were many fanart with tattoo-like designs and the color schemes were so good! I really thought Dragon Cry was a hint to what Natsu would look like but that obviously wasn’t the case. There also has to be some consequences on Lucy for rewriting a demonic book that was written by the Black Wizard. As much as I like Lucy I felt like she shouldn’t have been okay just because of Gray’s devil slaying magic. There was so much potential to this that I felt like was ignored to stay on the safe side of things. Imagine the pain of saving your best friend and willing to sacrifice yourself in the process?! It could’ve been a wonderful plot!! Natsu should also have some kind of backlash after being rewritten. The book was essentially his lifeline. I want to know more about it.

I desperately need another arc like Tartaros because it was peak. It had everything and considering how Ignia is Natsu’s half brother (with Igneel as their father) I need them to have some kind of interaction that’s not a battle. I need Natsu to realize something that’s either emotionally painful or have to make a choice between two things he’s not willing to sacrifice. Of course it doesn’t need to be these since it’s just my suggestions but I need trauma in the story with major loss.

Speaking of brothers, I need more Zeref content (maybe Mavis as well). I really like how Natsu has started to accept him as family which is really nice. Maybe he can go back into the in between at some point to have another life changing experience or just to converse with Zeref. Maybe more on their life before Natsu’s initial death. What were their parents like or even just their life? On the side note, I would love to know more on Mavis and Zeref’s afterlife with their children and just their relationship in general.

One thing I do need to have no matter what is Natsu and Lucy’s relationship becoming canon. It’s been long enough and we need to see their grow as adults who have mutual romantic interest in each other. Natsu can’t keep playing dumb at this point it’s getting slightly repetitive and annoying. His advancement as a character has gone downhill in the 100 YQ (I’m still upset about the pee joke regarding Lucy’s burn). So I need his redemption at least with Lucy and his feelings for her.

#fairy tail #lucy heartfilia #nalu #natsu dragneel #natsu x lucy #writers on tumblr #lucy x natsu #nalu headcanon #nalu analysis #ft nalu #fairy tail natsu #fairy tail 100 yq #ft 100yq #ft 100 years quest #fairy tail 100 years quest #fairy tail manga #just me and my thoughts #just my thoughts #thank you for coming to my ted talk #ignia #zeref dragneel #mavis vermillion #zeref x mavis #fairy tail zeref #zervis #etherious natsu dragneel #the end is near

[dootznbootz]

Hi, what do you think about epic the musical as an Odyssey fan? Just curious

As an Epic the musical fan, I LOVE IT! Everyone's so talented and I love the music style!!! It's super fun and creative and it's amazing that Jay basically writes it all himself!

As an Odyssey fan... It's INCREDIBLY different. To the point where it's more "Odyssey inspired" than the actual Odyssey. But that's the thing. I wouldn't say Jay WANTS it to be word for word Odyssey and I DO think that'd be...kind of hard to do? Especially for Modern day.

It still has most of the "spirit" of the Odyssey though I feel like which is SUPER important. I'm saddened that very few adaptations really "balance" Odysseus' assholery and "goodness". I love "shithead Odysseus" but personally, I'm happy as long as an adaptation keeps to a "family man who wants to go home" for the most part :D (I really fucking hate the whole "Odysseus! The clever, swashbuckling hero who gets all the babes! ...He has a family?!" bullshit. That's very much not him. (He likes shiny things, yes but that's it)

More personal rambles below :D

I think it's interesting that Polites in Epic is more "peaceful" when in the Odyssey, he's called "captain of armies". And the fact he's killed right away when he was one of the last men alive.

Also Odysseus' and Eurylochus' friendship! I think it's sweet in the musical while in the Odyssey, it's quite tense. It gets more and more tense in Epic later on obviously but in the odyssey, it's been tense for a WHILE. Also!

Shout out to Armando Julian! Eurylochus' actor! I see a lot of people talk about Polites, Poseidon, Circe, and Hermes and they get a lot of fanart and love with their songs (rightfully so, ofc!!!) but Armando is really talented and people really sleep on Luck Runs Out! I'm about to become a vocal nerd for a moment. He's got a wonderful vibrato! I really love how he sings "feed" during Full Speed Ahead and "Captain, please" during Remember Them for example. His voice really fits with "speaking on behalf of the crew".

I know most people have a lot of feelings with the Circe Saga but I think that Jay did a great job considering... everything. Book 10 and 12 of the Odyssey are very complicated and I don't blame Jay for not wanting to delve into EVERYTHING with that. Odyssey Odysseus gets SA'd twice and while "I'm Not Sorry for Loving You" makes me worry, I really do think Jay will pull through with how fucked up Calypso's situation while still not having the graphic scenes in the Odyssey. It would be very hard to not only have what was basically an exchange for his men to be turned back to humans but if he interprets it happening throughout the entire year like some readers do, then that's really hard. :'D To truly portray Odysseus' fear of Circe while still having her be morally gray. As she very likely didn't mean Odysseus harm after a certain point but he was still afraid regardless.

Not only trying to not have such disturbing stuff shown in his musical but also, I think Jay was possibly trying to be considerate of Madeline Miller's Circe fans while still trying to show Odysseus discomfort and distress???? 😅 Sounds weird but like, as soon as I heard Circe talking about the nymphs being like her daughters and that she protects them, I thought that. That book is HUGE and I'm sure that many fans of it don't necessarily want to see Circe's "I do whatever I want. I don't need a reason. Woe, Oink be upon ye." as the most likely reason they were turned into pigs in the Odyssey is that ODYSSEUS is associated with them (the boar scar, the metaphors when talking about him in the Iliad, his trusted Swineherd Eumeaus, BOAR TUSK HELMET. Like, that's kind of the animal that represents Odysseus. (even when a spear pierces through a boar's hide, it'll STILL charge as they're that ferocious and determined...Just like Odysseus, a man who should be dead but isn't because of his will to go home. Homer didn't write them being turned into pigs necessarily as a "Men are pigs" thing.

I think the modern shift in how the situation seen today and other media of the Odyssey is why he wrote the songs he did. And considering it all? He did a good job navigating it. I'm very happy with the results!

I have more thoughts probably but those have been stewing in my brain for a while :D I definitely look forward to the next sagas!

#Mad rambles #ask #anon #shot by odysseus #silly thing but as I basically write Odysseus (and Penelope) as asexual. whenever I see stuff that's like 'Odysseus pushed aside his lust i #order to stay loyal' I get confused like “He didn't get lust in the first place? OHHHH yeah. My headcanon.” #He wants Penelope. Even if there was an easier “better” woman who might possibly even look similar. he doesn't want it. #like xD I mention him finding Penelope's strange naiad traits but if someone else does the same things she does? He'll still be like 😐

[okaythisone]

Just finished book 1 of tgcf and some favorite points are:

- Xie Lian <3

- All the characters! MXTX makes some damn compelling characters.

- Mu Qing and Feng Xin following XL around in disguise. Like, it's so obviously them, right? And they're so annoyed about it. Nobody is making you do this lol. Does XL know it's them? Can't wait to find out what their deal is.

-Xiao-Ling. Poor girl deserved so much better. She just wanted to take care of the kid(that's HC right? I know I've seen fanart of him as a kid with bandages on his face). I'm horribly weak to the found family trope. Also, she gives awesome makeovers.

- FX trying to parent XL. Like stopping XL from eating the ground bun(lol), and worrying HC has "ulterior motives." It's adorable, but, my guy, XL is 800 years old. He has absolutely done and been through worse.

- the way XL has found entirely new ways to embarrass himself around HC. "Xie Lian hadn't felt this embarrassed in centuries," the horrors one can acclimate to, but being awkward is an unending torment.

- how XL kept making old person comments in the chat(array, whatever) and had to be stopped. "Xie Lian felt a little depressed. He wasn't even that old," you are 800! Who's old then!?

- XL making his own shrine. " If no one worships me, I'll worship myself!" Yeah, believe in yourself! I guess...

Then in the village, "Who's that?" "Um... I don't know either?" Bruh...

" What does he do?" "Probably watches over you and keeps you safe." Do you not know? I love him.

- HC's perfect human disguise and garbage acting skills.

- the way HC keeps messing with FX and MQ. Lmao, bully them. All three of them are being so unnecessarily dramatic.

- it was XL's tomb! Lmao, can't even save face by not saying how he 'died' because HC might question it, and still getting outed later. I thought it sounded suspiciously like him when they found it, but then it actually was! Poor guy.

-Banyue(girl, not country). Really paving that road to hell with her good intentions, damn. She's just so sweet? Gotta love a sweet character with a resting bitch face. She clearly cares so deeply about XL and wanted to grow up to be like him. Still shares the same dream he did and wants his advice 200 awful years later. I want to cry.

- XL taking her in (as much as he could) in the first place. Giving her the last of his rations, playing with her and the other kids in his free time. "Xie Lian didn't know where she came from. But she was a random wandering child, so he randomly took her in. When he was free, sometimes he'd teach her songs, sometimes wrestle, sometimes show off his busker move... and they got along quite well." (T-T) family... I want to see them grow closer.

- the dude XL told to live for him was totally HC huh. Man, you can't just say that. You gotta take responsibility for that XL.

- RING! That's the ashes right?! I saw something about that(ugh), but this soon? HC does not mess around... with XL. He exclusively messes around otherwise.

#my posts #tgcf

[rollercoasterwords]

hey! I'm sorry if you've answered this/spoken about this before, and if so please just point me in the direction of your previous answer. but I recently had a trans friend who asked me to stop interacting with the wolfstar/marauders fandom. liking/reblogging posts and reading fanfics within the marauders fandom are the only way I interact with jkr/hp. I would not do anything to directly give her money, but my friend's argument is that every like and interaction with the fandom makes it more influential, which translates to more money. as well as not boycotting hp entirely is a slap in the face to trans people. so, I've stopped reblogging content because I don't want to negatively impact my friend or any other trans people, but I don't personally think I'm doing any harm through engaging with fanart/fanfic.

obviously you're engaged in the fandom, so I'm kinda looking to have my opinion validated... but I think you're very smart and that we share similar values, so I respect your thoughts and any advice you have for this situation. thank you <3

honestly anon if ur looking for like a nicely-wrapped post of "here's why it's okay to interact with harry potter fanfiction" then u have probably come to the wrong place, as this is a topic that i still have conflicted feelings about myself! but. if u want a little essay of my thoughts on the matter then here u go xx

so, first of all - yes, obviously i still interact with hp fandom. however, i'm not going to pretend that i don't understand your friend's point. i get the logic behind the argument that giving any attention to any sort of harry potter media in this day and age helps keep harry potter relevant, which contributes to jkr's influence, which is an influence she actively uses to hurt trans people. i understand why ur trans friend would feel hurt or ask u to stop interacting w hp media altogether.

however, trans people are not a monolith, and there are many trans people who continue to interact with hp in a variety of ways. for me, the space i've carved out in fandom over the past year or so has been a little online haven since i have to remain closeted irl for the most part. hp fanfic has been an important outlet for me to explore + express things abt my own trans identity. but i am also very aware that within the broader trans community, i am not one of those who is most vulnerable to jkr's rhetoric + politics. at the end of the day, there are trans people who don't care if you spend money on hp, there are trans people who don't care if u interact with fandom as long as u aren't spending money, there are trans people who think u shouldn't touch hp with a five-foot pole, and all manner of perspectives in between.

for me personally, there are caveats to my interaction with hp + the way i navigate the ethical minefield of jkr. i don't think there is any reason to ever financially contribute to hp, whether that's buying merch or games or going to hp themeparks or whatever, and i discourage people from interacting w hp within the context of any sort of profit economy. i try not to interact with hp in a way that will grow the popularity of the franchise in any way - i post fanfiction on ao3, where the people reading it are gonna be people who are already part of this space that are seeking it out, and i have this tumblr blog which is, essentially, the same deal. i'm not trying to advertise my fic or get people to suddenly develop a new interest in harry potter, if that makes sense. this is part of why tiktok remains a bit of an ethical quagmire for me, because i feel that the way people interact w fic on there often blurs the lines between being inside or outside of a profit economy.

i also think it's important, when interacting with hp in any way, to acknowledge jkr's influence and the inherent shittiness of the source material. i don't think it's enough to go "dobby wrote the books haha!" and act like we can just ignore jkr, bc her shitty politics are built into the book. i think it's important to engage critically and to consider how you're building off the source material and whether ur unintentionally perpetuating the biases in the text by copying and pasting them without further examination. i talk abt this more in this post

and, of course, i think it's important to vocally stand against jkr + her politics, and to support trans people within + outside of fandom spaces in whatever ways you can. i think it's important to stay educated + engage with theory + politics in a way that goes beyond retweeting posts or watching tiktok clips. jkr isn't just transphobic; her sexism, racism, classism, fatphobia, homophobia, ableism, antisemitism, and overall horrible neoliberal politics are very much built into the text of hp, and if u are not actively educating urself on these issues it's gonna be easier to just internalize them without realizing it.

for me, these are all considerations that affect the way i interact with hp + the extent to which i interact with hp. however, there are people out there who would probably tell me to get off my high horse + stop acting like there are more or less ~morally pure~ ways to interact with hp, bc at the end of the day there's no ethical consumption under capitalism and people writing hp fanfiction isn't really harmful in the grand scheme of things. there are other people who would tell me that it doesn't matter what mitigating factors i'm using to justify my hobby; any contribution that keeps people talking about hp keeps jkr relevant, and i should be able to find other shit to write about. and like....i understand the perspectives of both those people, y'know?

i honestly just think this is a decision where every individual needs to weigh the scales themselves and decide what they're okay with. it's not my job to police or justify the ways people do or don't interact w hp media; if someone's interacting with it in a way i don't like, then i block that person or just don't interact with them. if someone sees me interacting w hp fanfic + thinks that makes me a shitty person, then they can think that and we can go on living our separate lives. some trans people continue to find comfort + community in hp fandom spaces, other trans people feel deeply hurt by the continued existence of these spaces. there is no single answer to What Supports Everybody. your relationship with your friend is something specific to your situation that you'll need to take into account when weighing your own feelings about interacting with hp; the only advice i can really offer is that i think it's better to critically consider the various perspectives people have on this issue without reducing it to a black and white case of two sides where one must be right and one must be wrong.

#ask #ranting and raving

[purplerose244]

Watched the fifth episode of LEGO DreamZzz: LOVED IT!

HALFWAY THERE BABY!!!!

I don't know how this season ends so I don't know if it's open to future seasons, but I'm having a blast honestly! It's such a cute adventure and I love the characters a lot! 😍

I wonder if we'll get some sort of reveal at some point, between Ninjago, Nexo Knights and even Chima that was always kinda present

Well we'll see! ONTO THE EPISODE!!!

PEAK PERFORMANCE

Heeeeeyyy some real world shenanigans! I was wondering how their interactions in the Dream World were gonna be while still in school, without all the mayhem 😂

Coop really is a cool guy, but after seeing his fears I worry about how stressed he is by everything

Logan just gives me huge Kai vibes and that's besides Vincent, just look at him 🤣

Owww, I feel like Mat is not good at this

LOOK AT Z-BLOB WITH THE LITTLE FLAG CHEERING FOR HIS BUDDY IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO Z I WILL KILL EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM AND THEN MYSELF!!! 💚💚💚

Yep, poor Mateo is good at lots of stuff but sports isn't one of them

I feel that pain, failing PE 😅

DANG IT LOGAN PLEASE DO SOMETHING NICE FOR ONCE I REALLY WANNA LIKE YOU BUT I CAN'T IF YOU KEEP BEING A JERK LIKE THAT AAAAAA-

Omg Mat got a grumpy pillow, have I mention that he's my son and I love everything about him?

SQUISHED Z BLOB 😂😂

Heeeeyyyyyyy I was waiting for the dream avatars! Finally 😍

IZZIE LOOKS AMAZING!!!! 💗💖💓💖💗💓 Between her design and Zoey's I'm having a hard time deciding my favourite

Pffff blue Logan 😂

Obviously Mateo's also really cool, gives me Lord of the Rings vibes (which is fair since he mentioned the book before), and I love the green eye and the green streak of hair where is was blondish before 💚

I'd love to see Mateo fanarts as human and not LEGO, but I will not risk looking up for it and accidentally seeing spoilers!!... like I usually do 😅😅

I don't remember Cooper's avatar being that different, maybe I'm wrong

Also interesting how he seems to be into following instructions, I think he's the most tame of the team so far. Mat got the strategies down, but Coop seems very rational as well

Izzie is short for Isabel?... I feel like I could've realized that... LOVE NICKS 😍😍

Towards the Sandman then? I'm very curious to see how they look like, so far the designs in this show are always really good. Even the forge master, being a simple kid, had something interesting about it

Why do I feel like Logan will do something very stupid

WHY DO I FEEL LIKE EVERYONE WILL DO SOMETHING VERY STUPID

Of course Izzie would make a giant rabbit and I have nothing but respect for her for doing it 😂💙🩷

Cooper seems to be very tame with his creations, just like it was said before. Not enough creativity. I feel like he will have to learn how to think outside the box

*Mateo casually flying with a modified Z-Blob mecha copter* YEP THAT'S HOW YOU THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX 💚💚💚

To be honest everyone is very young so I can't even blame them too much for making mistakes. Like, if there's an age to fail, it gotta be middle school

Does Logan have problem with authority or listening to people? With Mateo, with prof Oz, I feel like he really struggles with that. And I don't wanna trace this back to Vincent's other roles, but given how Kai didn't have his parents for a long time and Jestro was a straight up orphan, I wonder if his household situation is okay...

Look at me hyperanalysing something that is not explicit lol

So it is confirmed that Lunia was defeated while she sealed the Nightmare King? I wonder if we might see flashbacks or images of her at some point

YETIIIIIIII

OH WOW HE'S FABULOUS NOW!!! I know this came out before pride month but, like, this is pretty neat 😂🏳️‍🌈 Or maybe Jim is just really comfortable with makeup, fabulous either way!

Cooper got his magical girl transformation sequence as well! ❤️

Too bad we didn't see Izzie's 😢

Yeah he doesn't look super different, but considering he is passionate about cars the pilot look suits him a lot! I'm getting more and more intrigued by Coop, I think I understimated his character before

Aaaaaand Logan did a whoopsie again. He really needs to adjust himself some, and yes the others followed him suit so everyone got their fault but MAYBE DON'T USE THE THING THEY SPECIFICALLY TOLD YOU NOT TO USE?? 😵‍💫

I swear I wanna like you Logan but you gotta give me something to work with 😅 And you gotta learn the sorry, mah man

MAH BOY MATEO IS THE PLAN GUY LOOK AT HIM THAT'S MY SON HE'S SO SMART HE'S THE LEADER AND DOESN'T REALIZE HOW GOOD HE IS I LOVE HIM 💚💚💚

Izzie did not just say yeeted 😂😂

NUUUUUU NOT JIM 😱😱😱😱😱 DUDE STOP GIVING IZZIE MORE GRIEF SHE'S ALREADY NOT OVER SHARKYJAW 😭

Awww Mateo taking the blame 💕 To be fair they're all kind of at fault but yeah, the main issue was definitely Lunia's hourglass so good job sweetie!

Omg

OMG

FINALLY LOGAN FINALLY YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING NICE 🥳🥳🥳 I BELIEVED IN YOU FROM WHEN YOU VISITED COOPER AND THEN YOU BROUGHT SOUP FOR MATEO, I KNEW YOU COULD PULL SOMETHING OFF AGAIN!!!! 🤩

... it's, like, and EXTREMELY small step but one step forward regardless 😂

Cooper checking on Izzie was so sweet!... is this ship material? I focused on Mateo only so far so I don't know... I'll keep this as a maybe, we'll see what happens! 💕

I KEEP LOVING THESE EPISODES I DON'T KNOW WHY THEY HIT ALL THE RIGHT SPOTS FOR ME 💜💜💜

#keep em coming lego #lego #lego dreamzzz #dreamzzz #spoilers #dreamzzz spoilers #dreamzzz cooper #dreamzzz izzie #dreamzzz mateo #dreamzzz z blob #dreamzzz logan #mateo #izzie #logan #zooper #z blob

[crowning-art]

TGCF SPOILERS!!!

------------------------------------

This part was so cute...

Maybe it was all in his mind, but Lang Ying used to slouch, coiled in fear and nervousness; now, his limbs seemed to be stretched out, finally assuming the appearance of a cheerful boy, and Xie Lian couldn’t help but feel heartened.

...until we realize it's Hua Cheng lol. I got so happy that Lang Ying is getting better but like also, I'm still sooo suspicious of him from my book two days T-T But also, it was kind of nice to see that Baby Hua Cheng in the past was all 'I'm gonna stand beside you and protect you!', and its like, now, regardless of his form, he can always do that. It's kinda nice

I am getting SOOO attached to Quan Yizhen, it's not even funny iqjbfibfiwbfi plz, I'm not over my earlier trauma don't do this to meee

but also, he's so cute thoo

My face as I read the Brocade Immortal origin story:

There weren’t any sleeves for the arms to go through, so he asked his beloved girl, “How come my arms can’t stretch out?”

That girl smiled cheerfully. “This is my first time sewing, so I’m not very skilled. But, if you don’t have any arms, then this won’t be a problem?”

Thus, this young man raised a weapon and chopped off his arms. Now, the robe fit.

However, it wasn’t enough, and he asked again, “How come my legs can’t stretch out?”

That girl replied, “If you don’t have any legs, then this won’t be a problem?”

Thus, this young man asked another to chop off his legs too.

Finally, he asked, “How come my head can’t peek out?”

The conclusion was easily imaginable.

This girl clearly has a lot of time on her hand, someone get her some help, but also...who doesn't like playing a little prank once in a while lmao

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S CANON THAT XIE LIAN HOSTS ANTI SCAM LECTURES NONWOFWNK, plz all i can think of now is him teaching people how to avoid the Nigerian prince scam or smt, this is like my fave thing ever now, he would THRIVE in the grandparent population of today

She knocked and inquired after every house, yet not a single household opened their door to her. Naturally. When Xie Lian wasn’t collecting scraps, he would host lectures at Puqi Shrine, educating all those aunties and grannies on hundreds of little tricks on how to identify evil. To run into such an obviously strange uninvited guest in the middle of the night, no villagers would pay it any mind. People of today weren’t as easy to deceive as in the olden days.

TGCF out here expanded my vocab. Today's new word of the day; Maquillage, meaning to wear cosmetics or make-up.

ok but the demons are so cool??? Loving the Brocade Immortal, but like the Half-Maquillage Woman??? It's meant to make you feel horrified but like it's crazy people like that exist, It's insane like the people who get so much Botox/plastic surgery done to keep themselves looking young to the point of looking unrecognizable and almost...inhuman.

Me too buddy, me too T-T

Xie Lian recalled that this was something the Wind Master had told him while he stripped back at the Paradise Manor that one time, and he couldn’t help but feel his heart squeeze.

I miss Shi Qingxuan soo much

Yin yu, oh boiiii I thought Yin Yu and QI Ying had smt cute going on thanks to fanart???? UHHH IS IT CUTE TO BE GIFTING MURDEROUS CLOTHES TO SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT??

I'm sure there's more to the story but like broo

YIN YU WORKING FOR HUA CHENG???????

Reason number 23 as to why I'm getting attached to Quan Yizhen

Quan Yizhen was squatting next to a large black barrel of dye with his head poked in, inspecting the dyes inside; the fluid had a funny colour and emitted a strange smell. Xie Lian was afraid that, at any second, he was going to dip his finger in and lick it to test.

This part

Lang Ying was nonchalantly swaying about next to Xie Lian. That ghost masked man replied,

“Chengzhu is very busy at the moment.”

YA TOO BUSY BEING A SIMP

He soooo pretttyyyy

Xie Lian, on the other hand, rolled open the scroll and was reading through it carefully while he let his hair loose. Steam warmed his face, giving it a rosy glow. His long hair and lashes were shimmering black and dripping wet. He felt that thin silver chain on his chest; at the end of the chain there hung the diamond ring. Xie Lian gripped that ring, closing his fingers tightly around it.

At the periphery of his vision, he saw that on the corner of the altar there was a tiny little flower. He picked up that flower and brought it before his eyes, feeling his mind cloud just like the lingering hot air surrounding him; he needed to spare a hand to wave away the haze.

I can't, this is so cute like baby boi has to take care of literal feral animals lol

“Stop, stop, stop. Qi Ying, let’s agree on this: first, don't put random things in your mouth, and second, don’t put on random clothes. These are both very dangerous actions.”

However, Quan Yizhen pointed behind him. “Then what about him?”

Xie Lian suddenly smelled something burning, and he followed the direction of where Quan Yizhen was pointing to look. He saw Lang Ying had found some stick from a random corner and lit it on fire. He was holding that flaming stick and setting the hem of a ghost robe ablaze, looking serenely stoic.

“...Don’t…play with fire, either???” Xie Lian exclaimed.

LMAO PLZZZ Xie Lian give Ling Wen a break, She can't keep up

Xie Lian lifted that white hemp robe, and said softly, “...This hemp robe was but a random one I pulled from the pile. What ‘replica based on the original’, or ‘careful with the details’; it’s all nonsense I made up just now. As you said, why would I waste my time making a replica?

You’ve been tricked. This one isn’t even the same colour as the robe Lang Ying wore yesterday. But I questioned you holding it in front of you, and never once did you think it strange?

HOLD UP okndwolfkn LING WEN MADE THE ROBE???? Wait, there's such a big possibility that Ling Wen could be hiding/lying at this point. LIke NO way she just GAVE it to Yin Yu to gift it to Quan Yizhen, right??? smt else is up. Was she trying to bring Quan Yizhen down??? What was her reaction to the play from before again??? Or the LANTERN EVENT?? I have to go back to read it but I don't think it's smt evil she's up to, but it is a set up for disaster is what it is.

#tgcf #tgcf spoilers #xie lian #hua cheng #quan yizhen #yin yu #ling wen #tian guan ci fu #heaven's official blessings spoilers #heaven’s official blessings #lang ying #ch 128-132 #tgcf journey

[soulmeshart]

Why Stolitz will be endgame

Since the latest episode of Helluva Boss dropped (episode 5) I’ve been seeing a lot of people simply pointing out that Stolitz is problematic and toxic and that it shouldn’t be shipped. However these people never really think about the fact that  a) this is only the fifth episode b) where the ship is heading So I’m here to talk about that. What we’ve seen in these first 5 episodes is simply a look at what the relationship between these two is and who they are individually. This episode in particular was great because it pointed out two important things to us: 1. Blitzo doesn’t hate Stolas’ and deep down probably craves some sort of romantic relationship between them 2. The core issues of their current relationship Let me elaborate both of these 1. So far we’ve had the impression that Stolas is simply a nuisance to Blitzo and that he is simply using him for the book. All of their interactions up until this episode we’re pretty negative and made it seem like their relationship is purely sexual and that it exists for business reasons only. Episode 2 let us know that Stolas wants to get Blitzo involved in his life outside of the whole “transactional fucking” thing and this episode let us know that, well, Blitzo really doesn’t mind that. Think back to the first scene in episode 5. If Blitzo only wanted a purely professional relationship with Stolas or even hated him(as some people believe for whatever reason), he wouldn’t have agreed to go to the Harvest Moon Festival. There was nothing for him to gain by going there and he agrees to the invite without any real hesitation. This let’s us know that Blitzo doesn’t hate Stolas and is fine with being involved with him outside of their deal. Now for the “craving for some sort of romantic relationship part”. There are 2 hints about this in the episode. The first one comes in the scene where Blitzo tries to explain his relationship with Stolas to Striker and gets really emberassed. Remember what Striker says: “So you even conned that ditzy blue blood into getting you to the surface.” If this was the case Blitzo probably would’ve been proud of himself and simply confirmed that what Striker just said was true. But that wasn’t what happened. He got flustered and started fumbling his words around. The second hint is in the scene when Blitzo finds out that Striker is planning to assassinate Stolas. Striker tries to get to Blitzo to get him to join his side. He keeps telling him things that clearly bother Blitzo. For example: how the system is rigged against him. In those things he also lists the fact that Blitzo is being treated by Stolas as a toy/plaything. Now, why would Blitzo be bothered by this if his and Stolas’ relationship really is purely transactional. If that were the case then they’re both just using eachother and that’s the end of that. Blitzo is using Stolas for the book and Stolas is using Blitzo for sexual favors. Now weather this is or isn’t the case isn’t important here, what’s important is the fact that Blitzo doesn’t want this to be the case. Aka he wants his relationship with Stolas to be something more.

2. Now let’s look at the core issues of their relationship which are all presented in this episode very nicely. Stolas does a lot of condescending things to Blitzo throughout the episode. He baby-talks to him twice, puts out a cigar on his horn (though we know fire doesn’t hurt imps, it’s still disrespectful), he shows him off in public like he’s some sort of thing, etc. Now let me clear this up first, Stolas’ intentions aren’t malicious. He loves and cares about Blitzo. When it comes to the show, we know this because a) If Stolas just wanted to fuck an imp, he could’ve gone to way less trouble to do so and wouldn’t have to lend out his book which is VERY important b) He wouldn’t try to get Blitzo involved with his personal life and the most important person in his life, his daughter. A parent introducing their SO to their child is a pretty big deal. Now Stolas should’ve considered both Blitzo’s and Octavia’s feelings before doing that however we know that he really isn’t experienced with healthy relationships with other people (romantic and platonic). If we’re talking outside of the show, there are official instagram accounts for all of the Helluva Boss characters. The two most active ones are actually Blitzo’s and Stolas’ (jeez i wonder why). Now these accounts we’re confirmed to not be a 100% canon in the sense that not everything that happens there happened in the actual universe of the show. However Viv has stated that these accounts are ran by people who know all of the characters PRETTY GOOD. And in case you haven’t seen these accounts, Blitzo and Stolas have a lot and i mean A LOT of very positive interactions there. Sure we will occasionally get a horny comment left by Stolas’ on one of Blitzo’s posts or even a horny post of his own regarding Blitzo. But what we see more is just genuine wholesome stuff between the two. For example: Stolas constantly leaving positive comments on Blitzo’s posts such as telling him to have fun when he goes to hang out with either Loona or M&M, him supporting Blitzo’s passion for art and horses, we also get to see him putting up missing posters and searching for Blitzo at one point when Blitzo get’s lost. We see him visiting Blitzo to take care of him when he’s sick,etc. The list goes on and on. Obviously most of this didn’t happen but what’s important is the fact that Stolas clearly cares about Blitzo, like, a lot actually. The show hasn’t gone to this point yet but this is clearly where it’s headed. Plus the official twitter account for Helluva Boss reposts a ton of Stolitz fanart and they don’t do this for other ships, except M&M.

Now back to the issues of the relationship. All of the things I’ve listed (the baby talk, the cigar thing,etc.) wouldn’t seem like much of an issue IF there clearly wasn’t a class difference between them. In this episode the show REALLY let’s us know how bad imps have it. It’s rare to see them start businesses, the system is rigged against them, Stolas is also kind of condescending to them in his speech (though it’s obvious he actually does like imps and he isn’t intentionally being like this. He even calls the Harvest Moon Festival “charming”). I don’t think he realizes how inappropriate his behavior is. I think future episodes will almost a 100% tackle the topic of Stolas’ realizing how different the lives of imps are from his. This will also let him have a better understanding of Blitzo. All of his actions towards Blitzo through the episode, even thought they’re made with good intent, to Blitzo it just seems like Stolas sees him as a toy (even thought this isn’t the case).

In short, on one side we have Blitzo who is craving a romantic relationship (specifically with Stolas) but believes that Stolas is simply using him for sexual reasons and deeply dislikes his unintentionally condescending attitude towards him, and on the other side we have Stolas, who had lead a loveless life for years and has finally fallen for someone but is too blinded by his infatuation for Blitzo and the thrill of love to consider how Blitzo is feeling and the difference between their positions.

Now, this ship is going to be an end game ship a 100%. What we’ve seen so far is only what the starting point of their relationship is. They’re both going to grow as the show goes on and so will their relationship. Stolas will learn to consider other peoples emotions (which isn’t only a problem specifically related to Blitzo but also his daughter), the struggles of imps and how to properly convey his emotions so that Blitzo doesn’t mistake them as purely sexual. And Blitzo will also need to learn how to open up his heart and to stop running away from others (which is something he does I’m assuming, it looks like he ran away from his relationship with Verosika and it seems like their relationship was p serious given the fact she has a tattoo with his name).

Also while I do think Striker and Blitzo have a fun dynamic, I don’t think this is even an option as an end game ship. The sexual tension was high but that’s about it. Plus Striker was trying to manipulate Blitzo which isn’t cool in my book. Not against the ship tho.

So yeah, gonna reblog this when these 2 idiots (stolas and blitzo) get together with a big “told ya so”.

#stolitz #stolas #blitzo #helluva boss #helluva boss episode 5 #stolasxblitzo #blitzoxstolas #striker #helluva boss striker #helluva boss blitzo #helluva boss stolas

[mythicandco]

More bonding between Hunter and Edward?

Well I was gonna do that but then my brain went "Philip and Luz need love too" and then it went "What about the Little Firefly AU but it's actually Past to Future" and so here we are

P.S. Hooty backseat parenting is my life juice

Luz sat hunched over the pile of books she'd arranged as a sort of coffee table, scribbling various tiny glyph combos to see what would happen, then writing down the results on a separate piece of paper. Combining the plant glyph with three light glyphs got a kind of healing spell that healed up her papercut, but didn't work on the scar she got from tripping over a log that turned out to be a dragon last week. And she was still experimenting with shield combinations. Most of them seemed to involve fire glyphs in one way or another.

Even though she seemed focused on the outside, her brain was still running in circles. She couldn't help being excited about trying out the new portal door tomorrow - with Philip's help, it would probably be even easier to get home to her mom and Vee. For some reason the thought of Eda and Camila meeting made little sparklers of excitement go off in her stomach.

But Eda had told her to stay put today. The sky had been pouring Boiling Rain for the past few days and it took all the glyph combos Luz could come up with to make a shield protecting the Owl House. Plus, there was no way Eda was going to let them build a portal door inside, especially after last time ("What if Hooty imploded?" was still fresh in her mind, and it caused the girl to shiver).

Philip, on the other hand, had ran outside on multiple occasions and tried to drink the rain. Luz had needed to run up to her room and bury her face in her pillow, because that was not funny but it actually was. Philip's brother (what was his name again?) had almost immediately gotten up to drag his sibling back inside with an expression that probably meant this happened a lot.

It was also weird having what looked like an exact copy of Hunter around the Owl House. Or would that make Hunter an exact copy of Edward? Oh, look, she remembered the older Wittebane sibling's name. So it wasn't William. Why did think it was been William?

Speaking of Hunter, the witch had left in quite a hurry after dropping off the Wittebane brothers, and Luz still didn't have an explanation for his freak-out when everyone was walking inside.

What was she doing again?

Right. Glyph magic combos.

The girl jumped and let out a yelp as Philip sat down beside her. She had been so lot in thought she'd forgotten he was here to help figure out more efficient shield spells with her today, as a means of keeping him out of the boiling rain.

"Are these glyphs?" Philip asked, pointing at the currently half-finished combination she was working on.

"Yup," she replied. "So far I've discovered three and a half new combos."

"Three and a half?"

"Well, two of the spells are new, and one is just the shield spell but organized differently."

"Oh."

Luz went on to tell him how each of the different glyph combos worked, and Philip watched eagerly. The girl kind of wished Hunter had been there, too, maybe to get over his fear of the human. Which was weird, she thought for what had to be the fifth time that day. Hunter was perfectly fine around Luz and not obviously weird around Edward, so what was wrong with Philip?

"Interesting," the Wittebane nodded, taking out a pencil. He paused, holding it in his right hand, then took it in his left and started sketching out a few combos as well.

"Hoot hoot! What's going on, guys?" Hooty asked cheerfully, poking his head into the room.

"Still glyphs," Luz groaned, rubbing her eyes. At this point she'd been staring at the paper so long it was making everything turn inky and blobby. She was pretty sure that the most recent "glyph combo" was actually just a snake doodle.

"Maybe we should take a break," Philip offered, setting down his own pencil.

"I have an idea!" Hooty cried jubilantly. "Drawing competition! You two draw something, and I'll judge which one is better in a few different categories!"

"Ooooh," Luz grinned devilishly at the Wittebane. She was fairly confident in her artistic skills. "Azura fanart?"

Philip returned her smile. "Azura fanart."

They carefully took the glyph notes and put them in a neat - well, in a pile off to the side. Luz gripped her pencil. Philip studied his blank page carefully. Hooty started the countdown.

"Ready, set, draw!"

#asks #the good witch azura #luz noceda #philip wittebane #hunter toh #the golden guard #edward wittebane #emperor belos #past to future au #philip being a dad #edalyn clawthorne #eda the owl lady #king clawthorne #hooty the owl house

[rhosynviteri]

Ummm...I've seen a lot of people here and on Twitter be like "let's collectively ignore what LB did with Zoya's heritage". I'm going to do the opposite and TRY to show how much Bardugo f*cked up (I'm doing this mainly for myself. I need this out of my system). So let's start:

The Shadow and Bone Trilogy - Crooked Kingdom (2014-2016)

Zoya is white. Yes, LB never describes her skin tone, but she is the type of author who describes a character of color, no matter how background they are. I distinctively remember Paja, a Suli (the first one in the grishaverse if I'm not wrong) Grisha in Siege and Storm, whose heritage was mentioned outright even though she wasn't a really important character (she also literally died in the same book). But with Zoya? She appears in 4 books before King of Scars, and we get nothing. Apart from that, LB has reblogged this fanart in 2016. There (I will never be sick of showing it because it's the proof of the retcon) Zoya is very pale and LB has written under it this:

"Zoyaaaaaa!!! This is pretty much exactly how I pictured her."

King of Scars (2019)

This is the first book in Nikolai's, no comment, Duology. It has 39 chapters and 4 different PoVs (not counting the prologue one). One of them is Zoya's, she has 9 chapters from her point of view. In chapter 25 out of 39, we get this:

"She [Zoya's mother] had married for love - a handsome Suli boy with broad shoulders and few prospects"

That's it. That's all we get about Zoya's heritage in King of Scars. A retcon happens in one vague sentence, which someone easily can miss if they are even slightly not attentive. She is biracial in canon now (thanks for the rep, LB). I just want to point out that if Zoya hasn't been retconned, all the four PoVs would have belonged to white characters. I personally think that it was a last-minute change to somehow diversify her PoVs, especially considering how small and vague the mention was.

The Rule of Wolves Waiting Period (2019-2021)

Obviously, the canon biracial Zoya inspired even more fanart of brown Zoya, and LB herself has reblogged them and has put them on her stories. This had led a lot of people to believe that Zoya was indeed a visibly brown-skinned woman, to the point of believing that she was described as that (even tho back then we had only her hair and eye description, and that damn sentence). What made this idea even stronger? Official fanart like this, this and this, which LB has commissioned herself. The last one actually was part of the preorder offer of Rule of Wolves. Why would anyone believe otherwise after that? Even I would have believed it if I hadn't known better.

Then on February 17, this Kirkus review was posted. The part that matter for this post is this one :

"The multiethnic cast that includes queer characters and relationships showcases a White-passing biracial character grappling with identity and another character’s trans-coded journey."

Fans were worried that this white-passing character was Zoya, but what calmed them down was the fanart of the preorder. Because of course, LB would never do that, she would never commission a fanart with brown Zoya and then write her as white-passing (that's actually hilarious, because it's a LB type of thing to do).

Rule of Wolves (2021)

Zoya IS the white-passing biracial character grappling with her identity.

“Because I’m Suli.” Simple words, but she’d never said them aloud. She could feel her mother’s hands combing out her hair, placing a hat on her head to keep her out of the sun. You’re pale like me. You have my eyes. You can pass. The family had kept her mother’s name so that they wouldn’t draw attention. Nabri, her father’s name, was rubbed away like a stain.

We do get more stuff concerning her identity, how she feels about hiding this part of herself, and we get to know what she has experienced because of being biracial. I did identify with a lot of parts and they did speak to me, but it was so obviously done for diversity points (see the official fanart fiasco) that I just couldn't feel comfortable while reading the book.

Yes, a white-passing Zoya does make sense considering how Suli are treated in Ravka and how no one else ever mentioned her Suli heritage, but I think that LB handled it very badly. Her fans, especially brown fans, didn't deserve to be baited, and I believe that the fandom should not collectively ignore another Bardugo f*ck-up.

#anti leigh bardugo #zoya nazyalensky #rule of wolves spoilers #ok i'm done with lb #i needed to post this #i can't rant to myself anymore #zoya nazyalenskaya

[starlessalex]

A long ass post in which I think too hard about future ACOTAR couples.

After lurking at the ACOTAR tag, I saw a lot of great theories and analysis that try to predict the trajectory of the spin-off trilogy. I’ve decided to write my own take on the subject (probably to my own detriment - involving myself in another ship war wasn’t on my bucket list this year, but here I am). I was thinking about what the potential future couples of the story might be, but through the lense of the plot - which couples make the most sense plot wise, which couple have the most potential to drive the plot toward. Here are my thoughts on the matter.

Before I start I will make a couple of disclaimers: 1) I obviously have my ship preferences, and it just so happens that the ships I like the most are the ones that according to me make the most sense narratively. That being said I’m not trying to be malicious or rude about all other ship possibilities - I actually like some of them quite a bit too. 2) I let the books speak for themselves. I do not invoke any paratextual information regarding those books: no SJM interviews or online posts. This analysis is based on what, imo, can be logically inferred from the text. 3) Of course there will be spoilers.

If that’s clear we shall being:

In my analysis I focus on the plot and which couples ensure the smoothest and most logical progression of it. Because of that I do not focus on the foreshadowing SJM included in the previous ACOTAR novel: I don’t quote anything, nor do I talk about previous interactions of those couples. In this analysis, I’m interested in the bigger picture so-to-speak. So first we need to establish what that bigger picture is.

Those books are meant to be standalone fantasy-romance novels with an overarching plotline that will reach its climax in the third book (since it's a trilogy). Each book will feature a different couple which apart from falling in love will lead the story to its next stage. What it means for the story is that the couples that we will be following are all heavily connected to the main story/conflict of those books. ACOSF established that story/conflict as stopping/defeating Koshei. I would argue that ACOSF also established Beron as a secondary antagonist as he is Koschei’s ally. With that in mind, the potential future couples all have to be connected in some way to those individuals.

We actually have a pretty small pool of characters to choose from. Since the story was pitched as SJM was writing ACOWAR, that book is where we can start our search for clues about which characters are going to be the future leads. I don’t want to use SJM interviews for information because things often change during the writing process, however, just in this instance I will note that recently SJM said that not much changed from that initial pitch so all foreshadowing in ACOWAR is still relevant. ACOWAR established 7 characters with potential future romances and storyline: Nesta, Cassian, Elain, Lucian, Azriel, Vassa and Mor.

Four of them are directly connected to Koshei or Beron: Nesta and Elain were made by The Cauldron gaining power that might potentially threaten Koschei and Beron. Elain is especially connected to Koschei - she’s a seer and had visions of him. Additionally, as far as we know she’s Lucian’s mate which makes her connected with Beron. Vassa was entrapped and cursed by Koshei and is currently trying to escape him. Lucian resides with Vassa at the moment, plus he is Beron's stepson.

Out of the 7 of the potential lead characters, two (Nesta and Cassian) already had their story told, which leaves as with 5 possibilities. Mor, unfortunately, also seems quite unlikely to have a book for herself in the near future because since ACOWAR no love interest for her was introduced and plot wise she also doesn't have a lot to do with Koshei. She has a connection to Eris (about whom I will talk about in a minute) and by proxy to Beron, but, again, there isn't a love interest for her in sight (I will talk about why Emerie doesn't seem like a possible candidate, at least not yet). With that we are left with Azriel, Lucien, Elain and Vassa. All of those characters have direct ties to Koshei and Beron with the exception of Azriel.

After ACOSF, three more characters caught people's attention as possible love interests too - Emrie for Mor, Gwyn for Azriel, and Eris for ...well for no one, at least for now.

Especially the Gwyn and Azriel ship gained a lot of traction among the fandom. I for one, don't mind them. I like the fanarts and the aesthetic but, logically, they together won't lead any of the two upcoming novels.

Gwyn, Emerie and Eris, are characters that were only just fleshed out on page in ACOSF, with Gwyn and Emrie being only just introduced to the story in ACOSF. Additionally, Gwyn and Emrie have nothing to do with Koschei and Beron so, unless they are paired up with one of the three remaining characters with those connections they won’t have their own books. Maybe, if SJM decided to continue the story beyond the spin-off trilogy, then we will get books with them as leads.

So, we are left with the above-mentioned quartet: Azriel, Lucien, Elain and Vassa.

So how do we couple those characters up?

Elain has two possible love interests - Azriel and Lucien. Technically, both ships work but if SJM goes with Elain and Lucian than their book would have to be the last, because that is where I imagine Koshei will be defeated. Also since Lucien is connected to Beron, I imagine he will be the one to strike him down for good, or at least have a huge rule in opposing him at the very end. If Elain and Lucien book will be the next one we are left with Vassa and Azriel to lead the last book, not together obviously. They would have to have different love interests - the last book would have to be either Vassa x someone (Jurian, probably) or Azriel x someone. To be honest, if the next book is Elain and Lucien that would mean Azriel isn’t getting a book because as I said Azriel x Gwyn makes little sense as the second novel in this trilogy and no sense as the third one because neither Az or Gwyn have connection to Koschei.

I strongly believe that the person who is most likely to deal with Koschei and the person who has the absolute right to defeat him is Vassa. She's the one who has been entrapped and cursed by him. Additionally it was her conversation with Feyre at the end of ACOWAR that was a giveaway as to what the spin-off trilogy is going to be plot wise. It also seems right up SJM alley to have her female protagonist defeat her abuser in a very poignant and satisfying way. I’m pretty sure that Vassa is going to be one of the leads of the future two books.

Lastly, I think we all can agree that at this point it's obvious that Azriel and Elain are two characters that SJM wants to write about and they will be main characters in the spin off novels, whether in the same book or not..

So to add all of this up we have two possible scenarios in fort of us:

1) The next book is going to be Elain and Lucien, and the last book is gonna be Vassa and someone (Jurian, Eris?, Azriel????). This scenario doesn't make much sense because: a) It would mean Azriel won't have a book (unless he's paired up with Vassa, which by now is not foreshadowed or hinted at at all). b) There's no clear love interest for Vassa, because Lucien would end up with Elain. Jurian is a possibility but he's, you know, Jurian. I don't think many people would want him as a MC. There's also Eris (bare with me here). Eris, technically, has a lot of the same plot connections that Lucian has (son of Beron, connected to the Night Court where most of our heros reside) + SJM clearly loves him. This couple is far fetched, obviously.

2) The most likely scenario, imo. The next book is Azriel and Elain - they have plenty of foreshadowing, Elain is connected to Koshei, the seer and the spy infiltrating Koshei/ Autumn Court (there’s plenty of possibilities as to how they together can be involved with the main conflict). The last book, Lucien x Vassa - the will defeat Beron, defeat Koschei, Lucian as the son of Helion the Spell-Cleaver will break Vassa's curse once and for all.

There's also other scenarios, however unlikely:

1) Gwyn and Azriel, Elain and Lucian (why yes: both Az and Elaine get books, why no: Vassa doesn't get a book which is unlikely cause she's the person most connected to Koschei, Gwyn has nothing to do with Koschei)

2) Mor and someone, Elain and Azrie or Elain and Lucian or Vassa and Lucian (why yes: we get a Mor book which is great, why no: Mor has nothing to do with Koschei, we don't have a clear love interest for Mor, Az or Elain, or Vassa are not going to get a book.)

To sum this all up. The characters that the fandom should keep an eye on are Elain, Azriel, Lucien and Vassa. The next books will be about them, and the most logical way to tell their stories is to couple Elain with Azriel and Lucian with Vassa. There is plenty of great analysis of the subtle and not so subtle way SJM is foreshadowing those couples since ACOWAR.

Of course I can be totally wrong with my predictions but judging by what's on the page I think I'm mostly right here. To be 100% sure we must simply wait

#elriel #azriel x elain #vassa x lucien #anti-gwynriel #anti-elucian #anti elucien #anti gwynriel #vassien

[mythicamagic]

Funeral Flowers: a Sesskag Oneshot

Summary:  Sesshoumaru knows what Kagome's favourite flower is- because it just so happens Forget-Me-Nots have been filling his throat for months. Hanahaki Disease fic. Sesskag oneshot.

AN: for @drosselmeyerwrites​, who is also a lover of the 'suffering Sesshoumaru' trope. She's been a lovely commenter and wholesome person in the fandom ^^

Warning: body horror elements. This is a Hanahaki Disease fic with a twist on the concept.

Words: 10,000

Rated M

@cookieasylum​ drew an amazing fanart for this fic so please check this fic out on Ao3!

Funeral Flowers

It started as a mere flutter. Sesshoumaru could feel it at the back of his throat: the beginnings of something that tickled and irritated his windpipe- not enough to cause anything serious, but just noticeable. This sensation only worsened with time.

Kagome looked at him like he'd grown a second head after hearing him stifle a certain noise clumsily behind his fingers.

"Huh," she mused, peering closely at him. "I don't think I've ever heard you cough before."

After a few weeks, he'd begun coughing. A little blemish that he could easily hide behind his hand. Sesshoumaru had wanted no one to notice such a shameful thing. An unwilling action, but required in order to clear his airways.

"Hn," peeling long fingers away from his down-turned mouth, he looked away. Kagome shifted bare legs in the glittering water, lounging on some rocks by a river while half-heartedly sunbathing in a tank top and shorts. Golden eyes slid back to the slim, pale stretch of her smooth, toned leg as she swayed it.

"Kind of a human action, isn't it? Do demons even get colds?" her concern only seemed to increase. "You're not sick, are you?"

"No," he huffed, adjusting himself beside her. They kept a respectable distance. 'Friends' was what she called them. Sesshoumaru tried and failed to tear his gaze away from the parting of her thighs as she stretched languidly. "I do not get sick," he added, "such a thing is beneath me."

Kagome slid both arms behind her head to act as a cushion, laying down. "A few years ago you'd have said sitting beside a priestess ankle-deep in a river would be 'beneath' you. Things change."

Sesshoumaru tilted his chin up to regard her haughtily and gave a dignified snort, adjusting his rolled-up hakama pants. "It is beneath me."

Kagome rose a brow, fluttering one hand carelessly in a shooing motion, "go on then. Leave if it's so offensive," she sighed, trying and failing to hide her smile.

No.

His body flared alive at the thought, unsettled. Sesshoumaru bit back another prickling cough, settling for clearing his throat. "You should be the one to leave. This one was here first."

"Wha- no! I got to the river before you!"

"I was referring to age. Bratty mikos should listen to their elders."

Kagome burst out laughing, sitting up to lightly bat his shoulder. "That makes you sound ancient! You're such a dork. No one else knows how much of an absolute dork you are, do they? It's a crying shame."

Sesshoumaru did not know what a 'dork' was, but he assumed it to be something unflattering. He should've been annoyed by it, aggravated. Kagome's playful, happy scent made this notion impossible.

Thin lips twitched at the edges, dragging his heels through the cool current. He couldn't honestly put into words why exactly he'd shown up, following her scent. Logically, he knew he should leave her alone.

They fell into an amicable silence again, one that had been born from months of time spent together. Odd snatches of coincidental meetings had flourished into something more, and they'd begun seeking one another out for company whenever he visited the village. Sometimes she even paid him a visit the Western Stronghold. Any demons who complained about it were silenced by how… determined the miko was to make friends. A force of nature. It had amused him to no end watching ancients tripping over themselves to try to avoid her bad books.

He could also deeply understand those who had taken an immense liking to her.

Kagome was warm and teasing, a rare thing not wholly unwelcome. Her stories of the future were interesting, personality vibrant but down to earth and occasionally sassy. He enjoyed her more than he should, a quiet, snarky male by nature basking in her effortless glow.

"What's your favourite flower?"

He blinked, "this is a question belonging to Rin. I do not expect such fanciful notions from you."

Kagome huffed and flicked her hand to splash some water over his knee. "I can talk about flowers if I want to. Shinto asked me what mine were, so I got to thinking. I'd like to know what yours are too- or do pretty dog demons baring flower crests not have an opinion on them?"

He sniffed, bringing down one leg to create a splash that soaked her side. Kagome let out a yelp. "The Shiragiku flower. "

"Oh you can't be serious!" She giggled. "When I asked what your favourite colour was, you said 'white' of all things. White! That's the absence of colour!"

"This one is aware. You kept rabbiting on about it," he wiped some imaginary lint off one shoulder.

"But still! And now you tell me you like flowers that are infamously used for funerals," blue eyes rolled skyward, glittering with mirth. "Why am I not surprised, Mr Killing Perfection?"

Thin lips lifted into a sneer free of malice. "Very well, Shikon miko. What is your favoured flower?"

Kagome hummed. "Forget-Me-Nots."

Letting out a noise between a huff and a chuckle, he shot her an exasperated look. "And you give me grief over mine. Did you not say that blue was your favoured colour?"

"Hey, Forget-me-Nots can be pink, white or blue! I'm not as predictable in my tastes as some people."

That was most definitely true, he thought flatly. She had moved on from her first love, a Hanyou- only to bond with a Daiyoukai, and then…

And then…

Kagome stood, stretching both arms above her head. Sesshoumaru knew what she'd say before she even said it, wincing and bringing a hand absentmindedly to the base of his throat. It throbbed. Now the ache even seemed to seep lower.

What is this pain in my chest? He wondered. What is this strange sensation?

"I should go."

Sesshoumaru slid tired attention up to her and nodded silently. He would not wish her well.

"Shinto will wonder where I am," she needlessly elaborated.

"Indeed."

Kagome glanced at him and dropped her arms. "What's wrong?"

He thought to tell her, not for the first time. But it was silenced by everything else that had come before. Their history. Their species. Her lack of discernible interest, her new flame. A heavy weight pressed down upon his chest. His shoulder ached.

"Nothing. I am fine."

Dark brows pulled together. Sesshoumaru stood and nudged her away with a single palm on her back that lingered too long. "Go. I am… merely hungry."

"Oh!" a look of relief swept over her face. Kagome laughed, "okay, I'll leave you in peace. Happy hunting!"

Sesshoumaru felt his chest ache and constrict while his expression remained a blank mask. He covertly winced after she'd jogged away to a trail within the forest that would take her back to Kaede's village. She stopped to wave, and he quickly wiped his expression clean again, rendering it neutral.

Kagome smiled gently, her face full of friendly affection. Sesshoumaru regally inclined his head, eyes burning.

Do not go.

She left him alone, hurrying away to see her new flame in complete ignorance.

Sesshoumaru coughed and massaged the base of his throat as soon as she was gone, frowning.

Feeling something stuck to the roof of his mouth with his tongue, he curiously parted his lips and reached behind a sharp tooth to pluck the soft, small thing out.

Damp from saliva, a tiny, pretty blue petal caught his attention, clutched between forefinger and thumb. Sesshoumaru stared. A sense of creeping foreboding slipped into the back of his mind at the discovery.

This did not bode well.

---

His affliction made visits to the village difficult. It was easier in the beginning when he could hide a few coughs and tickles of the throat. Steadily, however, the discomfort increased. Sesshoumaru needed to pick out petals from his mouth every day, and the number of them only grew with frequency. He had to remove the irritating little things every hour now.

"Lord Sesshoumaru has been picking at his teeth a lot lately," he heard Rin whisper to Jaken, pausing mid-brush. She had been tasked with caring for the old miko's horse. "Is it a toothache?"

"Shh! Don't comment on such a thing so loudly, girl! If Lord Sesshoumaru wants to do some teeth maintenance, then he may do so!" Jaken squawked, frowning up at her.

Sesshoumaru cut golden eyes to the sky and turned away.

"Ah, I didn't mean to insult you, Lord Sesshoumaru!"

"You're STILL drawing attention to it!" Jaken griped.

Pointed ears twitched, blocking out their animated voices and tuning into a set of quick footsteps. Sesshoumaru inhaled, wincing as his lungs protested- the scent of citrus, summer and home comforts reaching him long before Kagome appeared from around the side of a hut. She beamed. His heart ached.

"Hey," she called, trotting over.

"Hello, Kagome!" the little girl waved enthusiastically, wobbling.

Steadying Rin atop her wooden perch as she continued brushing the tall horse, Kagome flashed him a knowing look. "You look tense. Is it from being near the stables?" she teased.

Rin gasped, "does Lord Sesshoumaru not like horses?"

"It's their smell, you nitwit!"

Kagome frowned at Jaken, before searching Sesshoumaru's face for answers. Obviously his silence and demeanour was starting to worry her. Taking a breath, he tried to ignore the petals stuck in the gaps of his teeth. He could feel more building, pooling in the back of his throat like thick mucus.

"They are skittish and afraid of this one. It is better to keep distance."

Predictably, Kagome gentled- but surprised him by easing closer. She seized his hand, tugging- and he was helpless to do anything but follow. Heat touched his cheeks.

Kagome walked backwards, maintaining eye contact like the femme fatale she wasn't, shifting her soft touch to grasp the back of his hand, lacing lithe fingers through his. She then forced the Daiyoukai's palm to rest against a warm neck. The horse shifted slightly, tail flicking, yet it did not startle. With Kagome's prompting, Sesshoumaru glided the flat of his calloused palm down the length of its powerful neck, the thin layer of brown fur tickling his skin.

"Maji isn't like other horses, he's calm around demons. He has to be if Kaede is gonna ride him to fight Youkai," her voice glided through his ear canals like melted honey. Kagome hummed, "though she said because of her age that he might be mine soon. Weird, huh? It's like she's prepping me to be the village miko more and more."

"It is not 'weird,' it is expected," he uttered, thrilled at the prolonged touch. How foolish. The heat of her palm felt exquisite, hand clasped intimately around his. "You will make an acceptable village miko."

Blue eyes flitted up to him, smiling. She gave his hand a squeeze. "Thanks, but… sometimes I wonder if-"

"Ah, so this is where you escaped to."

Sesshoumaru stiffened. Kagome ripped her fingers away- tearing open a gaping hole inside him. He quickly stifled a cough, but it was larger this time, throat clogged. His shoulders shook, sweat dotting his brow.

Kagome was busy being scooped up by Shinto, a large male. He dressed well, for a human, a jagged scar running over one eye. A momento from his mercenary days, he'd called it, though he was now reformed.

Kagome laughed and swatted his shoulder, demanding to be put down. Jaken piped up, yelling about indecency. All the while, Sesshoumaru fought not to let anything show. To not let the agony out. The jealousy. The consuming desire to act upon instinct and take what he ached for.

He couldn't stand it. Couldn't stand seeing the male's burly, meaty hands drag over her hips to settle at the base of her spine. Like they belonged there. Sesshoumaru coughed again, drawing away.

Kagome caught the action, turning to him. "Sesshoumaru?"

He hated the concern swimming in her gaze. It would be so much easier to despise her.

"I have lingered too long," he said quietly, trying to mask the rawness of his voice. "This one should be going."

Kagome nodded slowly, "do you want some honey to soothe your throat? It sounds a little-"

"No," he quietly snapped, starting to walk away. Confusion immediately curdled in her scent, and he regretted the lapse in control. Now she'd worry.

Foolishness.

"Lord Sesshoumaru!" Jaken hurriedly ran after him, following his Lord from the village. "Bah, those humans get more presumptuous every day. I don't blame you for leaving in such a hurry," he muttered, keeping up his tangent long after they'd met the treeline of Inuyasha's forest.

Sesshoumaru unexpectedly stopped, slamming claws into tree bark and causing it to splinter.

Jaken yelped, jumping and dropping his staff. "Mi-mi Lord?" bulbous eyes widened upon seeing him stoop over slightly, silver hair obscuring ashen features.

Sesshoumaru's shoulders shook, dry heaving sounds reaching Jaken's hearing. The retainer gasped, watching him cough, gasp and choke. Thick trails of dewy saliva pooled onto the ground. Rasping noises shuddered out from clenched teeth. Trembling claws reached inside his mouth, feeling something at the back of his throat. Grasping it, Sesshoumaru fought not to gag, coughing while removing the thing and looking at it with stinging eyes.

A Forget-me-not flower sat innocently between forefinger and thumb.

Both demons stared. Phlegm soaked petals rested at Sesshoumaru's feet. Jaken stood gravely silent for a while.

"Mi Lord…" he said thinly. "You have fallen prey to something very old…"

"You will not breathe a word about it to anyone," Sesshoumaru coughed, eyes stinging. He straightened and wiped his mouth, collecting himself. He threw the flower aside.

"But-"

"No one, Jaken," Sesshoumaru hissed, molten golden eyes burning. "Or I'll kill you."

Jaken yelped and quickly bowed several times, promising wholeheartedly not to interfere.

"I-I understand! However, if it's not too much trouble, perhaps you could hear out a suggestion?"

Sesshoumaru sneered and started walking again, his breathing slightly hoarse and rasping now, no longer quiet. His lips pressed together, trying to silence himself. It proved painful, and he quickly breathed through his mouth again.

Jaken tentatively continued; "your affliction is something ancient. I know little about it, but I do remember that it's possible to have it removed before it claims your life."

Sesshoumaru stopped, hands curling into fists. Claws scraped palms.

"That will not do, either," came his soft response.

"W-why ever not, milord?! This matter is potentially deadly to demons!"

Sesshoumaru stared ahead unseeingly. He knew of the affliction too. Had recognised what it was immediately. If he removed the flowering bud from within his chest, wiped away all evidence from her from his body, then he'd lose the very thing that had made him catch the illness in the first place.

His feelings for Kagome Higurashi.

"My reasons are my own," Sesshoumaru coughed behind his hand. "I will not die. Do not fuss over trivial matters, Jaken."

His retainer gaped, hurrying after him. Fierce worry painted his features. The infamous and deadly Hanahaki Curse could fell even the strongest of Daiyoukai.

---

It interfered with eating.

Sesshoumaru thankfully did not need to eat too often, but hunger inevitably gnawed its way into his gut. Transformed, he raced through the forest on all fours in a smaller version of his true form. Low-hanging branches lashed at his face. Forget-me-not flowers lodged in his throat conglomerated into a thick mass. They were practically a ball stuck at the back of his mouth. Sesshoumaru managed to ignore it just enough to track the scent of a deer- only to lose it and find a green pheasant within range.

Barely a snack, but it would do.

With a gurgling snarl, Sesshoumaru sprang at some bushes. Squawking with distress, the bird took flight- only to be caught in his jaws. Bringing sharp teeth down elicited a satisfying crunch. The taste of iron filled his parched mouth. Tilting his head back, Sesshoumaru had every intention of swallowing it whole. He'd done so before. The bird was small enough compared to his form. However, this quickly became impossible.

Red eyes widened. The flowers acted as a barrier, preventing food from travelling down his throat.

Spitting out the bird, Sesshoumaru tore into it. He tried again and again, breaking the kill into smaller pieces. He even tried drinking from the river to wash down the flowers. Nothing worked. No food could pass into his stomach.

With a low crooning noise that hissed out between his teeth, Sesshoumaru padded away from his uneaten kill with an agitated flick of his tail.

---

It affected his sleep next.

At his Stronghold in the Western lands, Sesshoumaru set aside his paperwork and retired to bed. Curling into a nest of furs, he stretched out long legs, sprawling on one side.

Only to feel a dull ache thrum from his ribs.

Wincing and setting a hand over the spot, Sesshoumaru frowned. He was unfamiliar with the sensation, however, Kagome had once whined and complained about 'pulling a muscle.' Perhaps the tight, clamping sensation echoed that pain. Deciding to roll over onto his opposite side- he abruptly burst into a coughing fit. The angle had upset his breathing, lungs protesting.

This vicious cycle continued long into the night. He tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable. Even laying still made him feel tense and pained. In the end, Sesshoumaru rose from his futon and began running.

Too tired to think, he transformed, relying on instinct to guide him. He whined softly; the ache spreading. He wheezed a little, breathing constrained despite being physically fit.

The inuyoukai sprinted to the outskirts of Kaede's village. Scenting the air, he caught a welcome fragrance on the breeze.

Mate.

Clearing the hillside with a single bound, Sesshoumaru shrank his form even further to that of a regular dog. Sniffing around the outside of a hut, fluffy ears perked. She was not home.

Where?

Following the invisible trail in the air, he padded around the village, passing by unseen by some villagers. Their lack of vigilance disgusted him. What lax security. Stopping at the Monk and Slayer's hut, he listened, hearing a soft humming from within. The sharp tang of blood, vomit, faeces and afterbirth caught his frayed attention.

The Slayer had been pregnant. From the sounds and smells of things, she had given birth and now slept while Kagome remained awake. He could pick up the faint fussing from a young babe.

Sesshoumaru stayed still, listening to the miko gently hum. Slowly, his body weakened, and the inuyoukai lay down outside the hut, resting a weary head atop large paws.

Something stirred from within, the rustle of covers. "Mn... are you alright? Want me to take over?"

"No, I'm fine," Kagome answered in a hushed tone. "He seems completely zonked out, little cutie-pie."

The Slayer paused, "your head. You said it was aching again earlier."

"Heh, Sango! You've just had another baby! Focus on yourself!" her lovely voice tinged with exasperation. "Really, everything is okay. It just hurts from time to time ever since that night with the boar youkai attack. It's no big deal."

"Prolonged headaches and amnesia does not fall under 'no big deal,' Kagome."

Laughing this off breezily, he could hear the shrug in her tone. "I just blank on a few things from the month prior to the attack. I'm sure it wasn't anything important."

Tired lids slid shut, and Sesshoumaru gained some sense of rest while imagining the woman within cradling a newborn pup instead of a gurgling infant. The two women talked some more, lulling him into a false sense of comfort even as his throat thrummed with continuous pain.

---

Breathing was a struggle.

Every inhale became a wheezing, quivering thing. Like crumpled paper that had been smoothed out and squashed too many times. Mucus constantly filled his mouth, senses clogged. His breathing ranged from laboured to a noisy, rasping thing.

He could no longer afford to visit the village. Sesshoumaru took to monitoring Rin from afar whenever he felt the need to check up on her. Needless to say, he avoided Kagome at all costs. The miko was an infamous busy body who would become a nightmare to deal with if she knew of his suffering.

Yes, that was the only reason.

However, on a random day he briefly let his guard down, the unthinkable happened.

Inuyasha found out.

If Sesshoumaru had comprised a list of all the beings he did NOT want to know about his affliction, Inuyasha would be right up there, along with his meddling mother.

Inuyasha stared, watching him with a complicated, horrified look on his gruff features. Shifting, Sesshoumaru stood from where he'd been knelt by a river.

Forget-me-nots floated downstream.

"... What the hell is wrong with you?" were the first words Inuyasha blurted out.

Sesshoumaru wiped his mouth, sneering. "I need not explain myself to you, whelp."

"Keh, if anything warrants a damn explanation, it's barfing up flowers."

He didn't need to hear anymore, turning with the intent to leave. No doubt the fool would talk nonsense, and he had no patience for such things with his current headache. His temples were pounding, throat parched.

"Why don't you just fucking tell her, you coward?"

That certainly caught his attention. Sesshoumaru halted. "What?" he croaked.

"Ya think I'm that ignorant, huh?" Inuyasha rolled his eyes, shoving both hands inside his sleeves. "I know."

"Know what, exactly," silken tones rasped. "You are but an ignorant pup. You were not raised within youkai circles, and so could not possibly understand."

"And whose fault is that?" shaking his head, Inuyasha huffed. "I dunno what crap you're yappin' on about, anyway. I'm talkin' about your secret relationship with Kagome that you had a couple of months ago."

Stiffening, Sesshoumaru felt his bones lock and throat inflame. He swallowed, wincing slightly. He flashed his teeth, "whatever you think you know, it is incorrect. A baseless assumption."

"Bullshit!"

Continuing to walk with every intention of escaping the pending conversation, he stopped dead the second Inuyasha opened his mouth; "I could smell you on her! But that all changed the second she hit her head. Did she forget you or something? You were happy to just abandon her after she stopped being useful for a good time?"

A deafening snarl upset his aching throat, ripping something inside. Blurring through the air impossibly fast, Sesshoumaru snatched up his sibling's throat and slammed him into a tree, causing the trunk to shudder.

"Silence," a blood-curdling rasp hissed out from clenched teeth like boiling steam. Crimson eyes glowed, claws itching to bury into the nuisance's windpipe.

Even while choking, Inuyasha managed to bark out a laugh, grasping a striped wrist. "You really do like her, huh? Never thought I'd see the day, bastard." White ears pulled back flat against his skull. "What's the deal? Just open your mouth and tell Kagome. Then I don't have to smell your pining ass all over the forest while you stalk her."

Burning embers were snuffed out. Sesshoumaru coughed, lifting a hand to his mouth. His shoulder thrummed, aching. "I cannot do that."

"Why not?"

"She does not remember," releasing him, the Daiyoukai stepped back. "The miko fell quite quickly for the male who rescued her that night. The fault lies with me that she sustained injury. If she is content with another, I cannot force her gaze to me."

It wasn't as though he hadn't tried. However, Kagome seemed happy with their relationship as friends. Guilt, stung pride and other such ugly emotions were all tied up with the incident.

Inuyasha blinked with disbelief, sizing him up. "When the fuck did you get so noble?" Sesshoumaru sneered, glancing away as his brother continued. "And anyway, what does that have to do with you coughing up flowers?"

Since he'd revealed more than intended as it was, Sesshoumaru felt no inclination to divulge extra information. He turned and this time; resolved not to stop walking. "Drop the subject, whelp."

"Maybe I'll tell Kagome about it."

Sesshoumaru did not falter, knowing the fool's game by now. "Do as you please," he dismissed in a wheezing, thin voice, stepping under the cool shade of weeping willow trees and leaving him behind.

---

He did not intend to revisit their old rendezvous point. Sesshoumaru had wanted to put it behind him, to let everything that had happened within the cave fade into obscurity.

The second he stepped foot within the mossy mouth of its opening, however, Kagome's lingering scent fanned over a striped cheek like a breathy exhale.

Long white lashes slid half shut. Hooded golden eyes became hazed. The memory of her salty, sweet taste wrapping around his tongue flooded his senses. Claws twitched, recalling the phantom sensation of full breasts falling into his palms as her back arched exquisitely. Her eyes had darkened into a lush, deep blue.

She'd been memorable, to say the least.

Walking further in, so that he stood fully submerged in their love-nest, Sesshoumaru basked in the illicit scents and breathy whispers he could remember caressing his hearing. It hadn't just been about sex. It never was with her.

Kagome had held his demonic hand without fear and stroked his cheek, murmuring ardently or giggling quietly. She told him things he hadn't thought he'd wanted to know before.

'You're nothing like your father' she'd said easily but with a conviction that made the ageless demon believe her. The notion should've been insulting. His sire had been unbeatable in strength, so of course he should wish to be like him.

Yet Sesshoumaru had never appreciated such compliments. He wished to be unique, bold, powerful, walking an entirely different path. Her words had been strangely welcome.

"And yet here I stand, Father," Sesshoumaru uttered to himself. In love with a mortal. Dying, because of a human woman of all things.

Just like you.

"Sesshoumaru?"

Golden eyes snapped wide open. A wave of elation, dread, guilt and longing washed over him. Every fibre of his being flared to life, muscles stiffening, heart racing. His lungs constricted.

Sesshoumaru swallowed a rasping breath, shifting to face the priestess.

Kagome crept closer, glancing around the cave curiously. "Was just in the forest to collect some things. I thought I sensed you close by. Looks like I was right. What are you doing in here?"

"Nothing," he said softly. His voice sounded fragile these days.

He could tell she was confused, radiating hurt. He hadn't visited in so long. No doubt she'd wondered why. The flowers buried within his windpipe felt heavier in her presence. He cleared his throat.

"Oh," Kagome scuffed a sandal over the dirt-covered floor. "Well... I'm glad I caught you-" she offered a tentative smile. "I've missed talking with you."

Sesshoumaru's insides screamed at him. The marks on his shoulder felt like blistering iron tongues being thrust into his flesh they wailed so loud.

Mate.

"I dunno what's kept you away," Kagome continued talking, making her way out of the cave. He followed, "but you haven't missed much. Rin is progressing nicely with her riding though. I'm not too shabby with that thin sword you gave me either, though Shinto says I need more practice."

That very sent icy needles piercing his skin. Stepping foot outside, Sesshoumaru couldn't stop the abrupt bite in his tone; "why are you here, miko?"

Kagome blinked and glanced at him over one shoulder. She then threaded her fingers behind her back, attention sliding away, voice unreadable.

"Shinto proposed to me."

Sesshoumaru stopped. A profound sense of loss rendered him breathless. He anticipated a coughing fit. Wheezing. Pain. But there was nothing, just him and Kagome standing alone in the silent woods. But she'd be beyond his reach for good soon.

He'd tried. He'd tried hard to forget, as she had. To push all the feelings and words right down from his throat into his chest. Maybe that was how the curse had started.

But he'd have kept the curse for good if it meant lingering in the 'almost' fantasy of them.

Now that illusion would shatter.

The very idea of her belonging to another felt like a wound somewhere inside him that he couldn't locate. The sensation of teeth on his shoulder thrummed, and he coughed, snuffing out the sound behind his hand.

"I didn't really know what to say," Kagome was muttering. "A part of me feels like it's too soon. I wanted to talk to you about it-"

"This one is needed elsewhere," he said in a clipped tone, turning on his heel.

He couldn't be her confidant anymore. Not about this.

"What?"

He began walking, trying to put distance between them. He should've known it wouldn't work as Kagome quickly caught up and planted herself firmly in his way, halting the demon.

"Okay, what is going on with you?" she demanded. "Is it the cough? Are you in so much pain that you can't talk to me?"

Sesshoumaru flashed his teeth in a faint sneer, throat protesting at the extended use of his vocal cords. "is it so unthinkable that for once, I may not have time for you, miko?"

"Yes," Kagome planted both hands on her hips. "Because this isn't an isolated thing. I've hardly seen you all month! And besides that, you're my friend, Sesshoumaru. Friends tell each other things. Remember how you talked about the court and how obnoxious General Kito was to deal with? Things like that. I need to talk to you about this- and clearly, you need to talk to someone about whatever's going on with you. I'm worried about you!"

His heart clenched, and Sesshoumaru bit back a hiss at the stab of pain it caused. Thin breathing rasped and rattled. He raised a hand, urging her aside via a gentle grasp on her shoulder to continue walking.

Kagome's grip was not so gentle as she latched onto his arm.

Frustration abruptly burst in his chest and Sesshoumaru snarled, whirling with the intent of spilling everything to her. Ruin their friendship. Burn everything they'd built and admit his failure to protect her-

-only to cough up a mouthful of blood onto her collarbone.

Kagome yelped in surprise, eyes wide. Touching the wet substance dazedly, horror paled her complexion. She looked up at him with palpable fear.

"S-Sesshoumaru?"

Humiliation stung white-hot and burning into his body. The visceral, blinding sensation of being exposed- of being seen- felt like too much. Too raw. As a demon unused to such things, his first instinct was to remove himself from the situation.

Sesshoumaru blurred away from her outstretched hands, putting the length of the clearing between them.

Kagome called his name again with alarm, asking him to wait, but he would not heed her call.

Taking to the skies, he flew fast and erratically, a wobbly figure. Coughing hard and feeling blood clog up his windpipe like mud, Sesshoumaru had no choice but to land not long after.

Within an overcast clearing upriver from Kagome, he steadied himself against a gnarled tree.

"Hah- hah-" he wheezed, doubling over and squeezing stinging eyes shut.

Something suddenly constricted tight around his lungs, around his very ribcage. Bones protested and ached. He gasped for breath, blood leaking from his open mouth to pool on the floor. Forget-me-nots mingled with it, petals stained red.

Jolting and snapping upright, Sesshoumaru arched his back, throwing back his head. A cry escaped him unlike any other. Loud, agonised and roaring in its ferocity tinged with pain.

Stems shot out from within his ribcage, tearing his chest asunder.

---

Her friends made noises of alarm at the sight of Kagome's bloodied clothes, but the miko ignored Sango and Miroku's questions, bypassing them in favour of finding and grabbing Jaken by the scruff of his robes.

"You're going to tell me in 10 words or less what the hell is going on with your lord," she demanded.

Jaken yelped and squinted, hanging from her hold. "Haven't the faintest idea of what you could be alluding to!" he sniffed.

Kagome snarled and bared her teeth, lifting him closer with a menacing expression and gesturing to the red substance marring her priestess robes. "This is HIS blood. He looked awful. Like- like he was dying, Jaken," her voice broke. "Please. I need to know what's happening. He won't tell me what's wrong and I'm scared."

Yellow eyes rounded wider, swallowing the imp's face. He appeared conflicted.

"Kagome!"

Releasing Jaken, Kagome shifted her attention to Inuyasha, who leapt towards her with alarm pinching his gruff features.

Dread dropped low in her stomach. That was never a good sign.

Distant snapping noises like wood being felled reached her ears. From behind the approaching Hanyou within the forest, large vines could be seen shifting and slithering over a portion of the trees.

"What is it?" Miroku gaped. "I sense a demonic aura, but it's distorted."

Kagome shuddered, feeling strange. She recognised that energy. Identified it as easy as breathing.

"Maybe a forest spirit has been disturbed?" Sango guessed, clutching her son a little more protectively.

"It ain't that," Inuyasha dropped from his jump, landing before them. He panted, white hair windswept. Of all people, his gaze landed upon the miko first. "It's Sesshoumaru."

----

Their way became blocked by a thick mass of vines crisscrossing through the forest. It created a wall, preventing any from entering.

"Lord Sesshoumaru must be further in," Miroku observed, leaning to inspect the leaves. "Beyond this 'barrier' I suppose you could call it."

"I wonder what could have happened," Kagome murmured, brows pulling together. "Sesshoumaru doesn't even have nature powers."

"Why on earth did you bring ME along for this?" a high pitched, nasally voice reached their ears. Sango and Inuyasha readily ignored it, while Kagome frowned down at the imp she held by the scruff of his robes.

"Because you're clearly hiding something, and until you come clean, I'm not letting you out of my sight."

His mouth thinned into a stubborn line, glancing away.

Kagome turned her attention back to the vines. Worry took root in her stomach. The memory of the Daiyoukai spitting up blood remained fresh in her mind, evidence of it staining her clothing and plastering it against her skin.

Handing Miroku their son, Sango went first. She swung Hiraikotsu with a seemingly effortless toss- the bone boomerang spiralling, cleaving trees in half but bouncing straight off the vine wall. It didn't so much as leave a dent.

Not wasting another moment, Inuyasha unsheathed Tetsusaiga. Everyone immediately gave him a wide berth, watching as he shook the sword out into a monstrous blade. He swung it back over one shoulder, feet planted far apart- delivering a swift blow downwards with a loud cry.

A burst of power shot out, heading straight for the vines. They made contact, and for a moment Kagome thought the consuming golden light might break through, only for it to fizzle out. The insurmountable wall remained intact.

Inuyasha tried again and again, using different techniques. None of them worked.

Nocking an arrow in her bow, Kagome took aim. Pale pink reiki split forth, coating the arrow while glowing ever more blinding until she set it free.

She held out hope as it shot through the vines, managing to burst through the dense foliage- which repaired itself almost immediately, covering up the hole.

"Nothing appears to be working," Miroku muttered, turning his friends. "Perhaps we should seek advice elsewhere first before trying to continue."

Her friend's voices faded into background noise as Kagome approached the vines. Frowning slightly, she stretched out her senses, using her aura to touch and brush against the barrier. It felt like him.

If that were the case, the wall was of Sesshoumaru's own making, whether he'd consciously chosen to hide away or not. Perhaps they were going about things the wrong way.

Thinking back to Maji and how carefully they'd run their linked hands down his neck, she raised a palm. Gradually easing closer, Kagome set it down gently onto the vines, stroking downwards.

Hearing outcries of alarm as the greenery parted, only for swirling stems to curl about her shoulders- Kagome quickly grabbed Jaken.

"It's okay, guys. Just find a way to follow me in later," she met their startled gazes. "I feel like I need to reach him quickly."

"Kagome, wait!"

Ignoring their protests, Kagome lept into the fray. She welcomed the green vines that wrapped around her, enclosing the miko and wailing kappa securely behind its wall.

---

Mercifully the winding tendrils of vines that moved as though infused with a will of their own allowed her freedom of movement. Kagome climbed through their moving, twisting stems, occasionally losing her footing and having to grasp hold of some.

"Again, I ask; WHY ARE YOU BRINGING ME ALONG WITH YOU?!" Jaken shrieked, clinging to her back and looking around fretfully.

"You know the answer to that. Tell me what you know about Sesshoumaru's situation and I'll let you go," Kagome hummed, shielding her eyes and looking up at sprawling branches above where sunlight streamed through. Maybe she could punt him over the treetops.

"I have sworn not to break my vow of silence on the matter!"

Grinding her teeth, Kagome stopped and reached over her shoulder, tearing him from her back to frown at him. "If your silence ends up hurting him, is it even worth it? Which means more to you; Sesshoumaru's trust or his life?"

Jaken clamped up, thinking about this for a moment. His eyes abruptly filled with tears, "fine! But you had best save me from his wrath once this is over."

Kagome grinned and patted him on the head, continuing to walk. "I promise."

He huffed, "Lord Sesshoumaru is suffering from a curse."

Blue eyes widened, and Kagome set Jaken over her shoulder like she would Shippo. He did not appreciate the gesture as the kit would while she minded swirling vines aside from their path and ducked through. "What kind of curse?"

"How much do you know about youkai mates, foolish mortal?"

At that, she tilted her head, noticing a blue flowering bud among the vines and gently touching it in passing. "Very little. I know they're like married couples. They, uh... make love and bite each other instead of having a wedding ceremony and stuff. That about sum it up?"

"Insolent girl!" Jaken griped, noticing the bud she touched opening up into a flower behind them. "It is far more than that! Their energies synchronise, aura's linking. However, it's quite imperative they both bite one another."

"Or else the mating is incomplete? What's so bad about that?"

"The partner that was bitten will consider them mated and suffer a one-sided attachment. This isn't so terrible if they have the bite mark healed and lose their troublesome feelings towards their mate," he continued with a self-important air. Kagome didn't mind it if it meant getting answers. "But... if they choose to linger in longing and are prevented from completing the mating, then their energies become distorted! Their youki takes on a life of its own as flowers."

"That's what these vines are," Kagome mused. She shifted, a strange, unsettled feeling churning in her gut. "You're implying someone bit Sesshoumaru? He'd never allow someone to do that if he didn't want it- let alone not reciprocate. Besides, if he could remove it, he'd have surely done so."

"I agree this situation is unprecedented! Unthinkable! Besides that, ANY partner resisting Lord Sesshoumaru's advances is unworthy of being his mate! AH-!"

Kagome jolted, feeling a weight lift from her back. Glancing over her shoulder, she gaped and strained to reach Jaken. Vines had wrapped tight around his mid-section, lifting him away.

"Hang on!" she shimmied her bow off her arm, quickly taking aim. Releasing the arrow, she watched as it hit the mark, sailing through a vine and breaking it in two. Jaken yelped, falling, only to be caught by another vine that continued dragging him back the way they'd come.

"J-just leave me!" he wailed. "Go save Lord Sesshoumaru!"

Kagome blinked, strangely touched. Nodding with conviction, she turned and hurriedly continued to make her way through the dense foliage.

---

Her breath caught the second she caught sight of the flowers.

Forget-me-nots littered the area, becoming more frequent the further in she ventured. Soon she practically waded through a sea of blue petals. They hugged trees, peppering logs, the ground beneath her feet, even climbing above to hang from branches. The vast mass of familiar flowers eventually opened out into a huge clearing packed full of them.

And there, at the centre of it all, Kagome finally saw him.

Vines had burst his chest open, putting quivering lungs on full display. To her horror, she witnessed them expanding and deflating with each struggling, wheezing breath. His ribcage had been repurposed for a vase of flowers. Vibrant blue forget-me-nots poked out between his ribs, green stems tightly wrapped around his bones, constricting.

Sesshoumaru's body lay tilted back, face turned upwards to the sky. Glassy eyes were vacant, blood caking his chin. His armour and hankimono lay shattered and torn on the ground. Around him, the stems that had spilt forth from his gut propped up his lifeless form, clearly part of the mass of greenery that had hindered her approach. Kagome covered her mouth, hand shaking. Tears pricked her eyes. Blue veins visibly spread over his flesh, causing her to wonder if the stems had buried beneath his very skin.

This was not Sesshoumaru. It couldn't be.

Choking on nothing, Kagome hurried closer with a thin noise. Reaching his motionless form, her hands hovered uselessly over his decimated chest. She didn't know where to start. How could she even help him?

"Who did this to you?" her voice wobbled. Stinging eyes misted over, running over his body. He looked like a corpse that had been picked clean by crows. His moving lungs moving were the only indication he was even alive.

"Sesshoumaru- I don't know if you can hear me," Kagome tried, reaching out and touching his cheek. It shocked her skin, icy to the touch. "But please- let go of the person who caused this," she said, locating what she assumed was the mating mark upon his shoulder. "No one is worth dying over. You could start over with your mate. Ask them out- anything!" she shuddered, looking at the flowers poking out from his ribs.

"Just don't die! This isn't like you!" Kagome snapped, tears rolling hotly down her cheeks to slide free from her chin. "Fight this! Keep living. T-there's still so much I want to talk to you about."

The tears landed upon pretty blue petals.

Leaning against him slightly, Kagome sobbed. She wondered if she could just reach out and rip the awful things free from inside his chest.

Why Forget-me-nots, anyway? Why not another flower-

The mating mark halted her hand, fingers brushing the stems. It didn't look like an animal bite, nor did it belong to a demon.

Kagome's eyes slowly widened. She had a distinct tooth at the back of her mouth.

The tooth marks looked like a perfect mould of her teeth.

"Was it...me?" she breathed, glancing up at Sesshoumaru's features dazedly. "Those blank spots in my memory. Was I... with you?"

The puzzle pieces slotted into place perfectly. Kagome stared, feeling like a fool for having not noticed. She'd just thought, assumed- he would never look at her like that.

But if the miko cast her memory back and pictured Sesshoumaru's lovely features, his honeyed gaze resting upon her face, half-lidded, lips quirked, face soft and drinking her in- maybe he had been looking at her 'like that' the whole time.

Kagome shook her head, feeling frantic. She latched onto his shoulders.

"I-I'm so sorry. I'm sorry! I never meant for this to happen. Why didn't you bite me? Why didn't you TELL me, you stupid demon!" she snapped, cheeks reddening as a fresh wave of tears stung her eyes. "All that time we spent together goofing off and talking- and you were suffering in silence? You're so stupid, Sesshoumaru!"

His anguished face did not stir. Kagome mindlessly wiped away the dried blood from his chin with shaky fingers.

"There's no taking this back now," she said quietly, glancing at the bite mark. "So... I guess there's only one thing for it."

It sounded terrible, but Shinto was far from her mind as she lay a hand over her mating mark and began concentrating. When resolving to save someone, Kagome became bullheaded. Sesshoumaru was all she could see as her aura rose out from her body, seeping into his bloodstream via the bite marks.

"You need to wake up," she mumbled, using her free hand to adjust the parting of her white kosode. Sliding it off one shoulder to bare her flesh, Kagome remained heedless of the vines growing and curling around them. They seeped into her ebony hair, twining into the long locks like a lover's hands.

Kagome straddled the Daiyoukai, shuddering a little at being so close to his bare bones. She couldn't have sex with him, obviously, but she suspected it wasn't truly needed to complete the bond. Feeding her energy into his body, she bit her bottom lip. Sweat beaded on her brow.

She began to mumble and pray under her breath.

When her spiritual energy had spread through most his system, Kagome grit her teeth and hoped he'd forgive her. Laying one hand atop his rib-cage directly over his heart, she raised her voice.

"Wake up!"

A pulse of reiki shot out through her palm.

Sesshoumaru jerked beneath her. A ghastly, chocking noise escaped him. His head lolled to the side as he looked at her unseeingly, a trickle of blood welling from the corner of his pale mouth. Kagome quickly wrapped an arm around him, guiding his head to her shoulder.

"Bite down, Sesshoumaru," Kagome whispered fiercely into his ear.

Sharp canines brushed her skin, causing a shiver. Wet flecks of blood accompanied it as he coughed. Whimpering with desperation, the miko curled trembling fingers into silver hair. She pressed a kiss against his cheek.

"Please- I want this." She'd do anything to save him. Besides that, a small, buried part of her felt strangely at peace with the action and its meaning. "Bite down!"

A blood-curdling snarl vibrated out from his open chest. Fangs sank deep into her shoulder. At once, dark, dominating youki burst through her system like a shot of adrenaline. Kagome gasped, back arching. It turned her heart into a burning star. Sesshoumaru's presence filled her until she practically burst at the seams. She distantly understood why youkai had sex before biting each other, reeling from it. The orgasm probably softened the intensity. Completion was something the mind could fathom, a release, the pooling of cum inside her.

This felt overwhelming. He was everywhere. His energy burned and licked, igniting and soothing her body like burning whisky.

Kagome felt the pinpricks of fresh tears in her eyes, overcome with a hurricane of emotions she couldn't quite name. She could feel his weakness. His exhaustion. The part of him tethered to her became a lifeline between them, feeding him the energy he'd lost.

Sesshoumaru's mouth peeled back from her flesh. He panted, sinking back. Kagome caught him about the shoulders, cradling him close.

A wave of tiredness sent her sinking down against him, lashes falling shut as dizziness spun her vision.

The last thing she saw before surrendering to the lure of unconsciousness was a canopy of Forget-me-nots surrounding their weary bodies.

----

Drowsy lids slowly cracked open- wincing at the setting sun's harsh orange light peeking out from between the trees. Golden eyes averted and Sesshoumaru stirred with a dusty rumble.

Something heavy lay over his bare chest. He lifted his head.

Kagome rested against his shoulder, dark hair spilling everywhere. Sesshoumaru stared, feeling he must be dreaming. They were laying within a clearing together, which looked clear, quiet and picturesque.

Squinting, he sat up, adjusting the woman against him. Kagome sank against his side, revealing a gaping hole in his flesh, exposing his rib-cage.

Ah, that's right.

The flowers. The vines spilling forth from his chest as blood asphyxiated him, making breathing impossible.

And Kagome...

The miko had come for him. Saved him.

Sesshoumaru ghosted stiff fingers over his mouth, dragging clawed nails down to the fresh bite mark branding his shoulder. He then shifted Kagome, running an aristocratic nose to similar marks adorning her shoulder- a tongue sliding out to drag over bloodied flesh. She tasted wonderful.

Kagome groaned and wrapped her arms around him tighter, burying her face in the juncture between his neck and shoulder.

Closing his eyes, Sesshoumaru held her close and revelled in the sensation. However, he soon picked up on the far off shimmer of his barrier enclosing them within their mini safe space. He could sense Inuyasha waiting outside, along with Jaken.

Deciding to lower it, Sesshoumaru rested his lips against the crown of Kagome's head before drawing himself up to stand unsteadily, lifting her into his arms.

When Inuyasha burst into the clearing, leaves scattering and clinging to his thick white hair, he brandished Tetsusaiga, only to lower it with a raised brow.

Sesshoumaru stood clad in his hakama pants, arching a regal brow in return. He approached the hanyou and passed Kagome over wordlessly, ignoring his noise of surprise at the sight of his ribcage.

"It is healing," the demon dismissed.

"Uh, alright," Inuyasha grunted, supporting Kagome. "Should I even ask what the hell happened?"

Sesshoumaru ignored him in favour of looking at the miko. His shoulder ached, and when he drew back his heel with the intention to leave- a fresh wave of discomfort elicited a wince.

Kagome stirred, blue eyes blinking open. She then drew a hand out towards him, "where are you going?"

"This one is..." he trailed off. "I must..."

"No, you don't," she murmured. Patting Inuyasha's shoulder to prompt him to set her down, Kagome flashed her friend a smile. "Thanks for coming for me, but I need to stay with this impossible guy to make sure he heals alright."

Inuyasha eyed the bite mark on her shoulder, nostrils flaring. "You sure?"

Kagome nodded firmly.

"What do ya want me to tell Shinto if he asks where ya are?"

Guilt passed over her face, and blue eyes flicked away, before finding him again. "Just say I'm visiting another village. I need to tell him the truth myself."

Relenting, Inuyasha stepped away, shooting Sesshoumaru a warning look before reluctantly leaving them be again, feeling like the wind had been thoroughly knocked out of his sails.

The Daiyoukai watched her, stunned.

"It's crazy you're even up and walking around in your condition," Kagome rubbed at her forehead, reaching out and seizing frozen fingers. "Come on, let's find a cave to take shelter in for the night."

----

The demon lord stopped and slid unrelenting attention down to her once they reached the mouth of a cave. "What made you choose this place?"

"I dunno, it wasn't far away and it felt familiar," Kagome hummed, meeting his gaze. "Have we... used it before? In the past?"

Golden eyes cracked wider. "You remember?" he asked in a quiet, brittle tone.

She shook her head, "not at all. I just figured it out. Would've been nice if you'd told me," releasing his hand, she wandered inside, finding a bed of furs awaiting them further in, cracks of sunlight streaming in through holes in the rock ceiling. Her cheeks reddened a little, imagination running wild.

"You really scared me back there," she murmured, back turned to him. "I thought you were going to die."

"That is why you completed the mating," Sesshoumaru uttered. To save him, and for no other reason.

A part of him had hoped she'd remembered, but another had immediately recognised the sacrifice she'd made. Kagome was a selfless individual in the face of danger. If Inuyasha were dying, or any of her other friends, he wondered if she'd mate them if it meant saving their lives.

With a benevolence he did not truly feel, Sesshoumaru forced himself to prioritise her comfort. "If this is not something you wish for- there are ways of severing the bond."

"Stop," she grit out, whirling to face him. Flinty blue eyes took his breath away. "Stop lying all the time. I remember valuing your company and opinion because you were always so blunt with me. You never held back your opinions."

"I am not lying, there is a way to sever it."

"But that's not what you want! Damn it- you nearly died because you couldn't open your mouth! Just be honest for once and tell me how you're feeling, Sesshoumaru. What do YOU want?"

Energy lashed at the air, kicking up a breeze that caused dark hair to fly back. Hands closed over the back of her neck, cradling her skull. Lips were shoved against hers, smothering startled breath.

"You," Sesshoumaru breathed in a brief parting, kissing her fiercely again. His mouth slanted ardently over hers, the hint of a fang brushing her lips. "Is it not obvious I cannot abide anything but having you? Foolish woman, it is for your sake I held back. Once you submit, there is no escaping me."

Kagome gaped, unable to keep up with the sheer amount of heated kisses. Her hands settled over his arms, heat igniting her cheeks. She'd never received a kiss like it before and tentatively returned it. A small gasp and accompanying noise from him only confirmed to her how much he wanted it. She could feel the tension in his frame. He was holding back even now.

When he pulled away, she panted, thumb dragging over magenta cheek stripes. "Didn't that feel so much better than burying everything?" she teased weakly. "Even if I'd rejected you, surely that would've been better than regret- than nearly dying."

Sesshoumaru's gaze slid away. He then released a long sigh, clawed hands curling in her hair. "You seemed happy with the mercenary."

"Ex-mercenary," she corrected out of habit, leaning into his touch. "And I was. I like him. But..." Kagome looked at him. Really looked, and somehow it clicked that his face was the only one she wanted to wake up to in the mornings to follow. When had things gotten to that point? Had she wanted this while lazing on the riverbank with him so long ago? Things would've been so much more simple if she'd identified it sooner. If he'd said something.

How foolish they both were.

Stepping closer, she blushed and tilting her head back in order to ghost her lips over a firm jaw. "I like you more."

Power sparked her insides at the ensuing shudder he gave. "Mating entails more than 'liking' one another, miko. Can you deal with my extended company? Being mine?"

Kagome pretended to consider this. "For how long?"

His lips quirked. "Centuries. Possibly thousands of years."

"That's a long time," her eyes danced. "I guess I'm okay with that if you work on your communication skills."

He inclined his head gravely, dipping his nose into her hair and inhaling a lungful. It felt so good to have clear airways again.

"Sesshoumaru, there is something I want to ask you about; Why didn't you bite me? And what happened during that night I lost my memories?"

"I intended to, miko," he said with dark promise. Displeasure curled his lip. "You managed to bite me during climax. I do not think you understood the ramifications of it at the time. I would have reciprocated nonetheless. Unfortunately, my senses- brilliant as they are- sensed a disturbance in the forest. A herd of boar youkai were bolting towards your precious village."

He could scowl all he wanted about it, but Kagome knew of his attachment to Rin. No doubt they'd both wasted no further time in lovemaking and quickly made for the village.

"We fought them, tried to redirect them. You asked me to save a boy that had fallen during the village's impromptu evacuation. Naturally, I did so- but it meant leaving you alone."

Kagome winced. Her hand found the back of her head, remembering waking to a sizable bump and stitches. "They got me, huh?"

"One struck you down," Sesshoumaru uttered with a weary tone. "I did not know where you were, as we had become separated in the chaos. When I eventually found you... the mercenary was nursing your wounds."

"I remember," she said gently. A stab of sympathy clenched her heart. Stroking a hand down his bicep, she sighed. "That must've been awful, to lose me so soon after almost completing the mating. I didn't realise, didn't recall our relationship. I greeted you so casually and didn't get why you were lingering around in his hut."

"The fault is not yours," Sesshoumaru rested large hands possessively on her hips.

Kagome glanced at him, squinting. "Neither is it yours," she pressed her fingers to his lips when he opened his mouth. "Nope! Not yours. I wouldn't have wanted you to prioritise guarding me that night. If you had, that boy you saved might've lost his life. Besides, I can usually take care of myself. They caught me on a bad day."

The two fell into silence. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, resting thin lips against the crown of her head while Kagome leaned carefully against him.

"I find it weird that we've had a whole conversation while you have a massive hole in your chest. At least I can't see your whole ribcage like before. Seems like the skin and muscle are repairing," she mumbled.

"It will heal quickly," he dismissed, palms gliding over her back.

Kagome made a soft noise, basking in his warmth. "It's also weird that this feels so natural to me," she lifted her head, catching his eye. "I might not remember us. Ever. So just... promise me you won't search for my past self in me. I've been through that before."

He swept her down into the furs, covering her form with his own. "Hn, we will live in the present."

Heat flushed her cheeks as she sank into the soft, comforting furs. Her heart fluttered, stomach jumping. "Thank you."

A silver curtain of hair blocked out their surroundings as Kagome pulled him closer, both mindful of his injury. She smiled, searching his gaze and slowly delivering a sweet kiss to his lips.

Sesshoumaru let out a long sigh of relief, their foreheads meeting.

"Hey, on the bright side..." Kagome gave him a cheeky grin. "I get to experience my 'first time' with you again."

Astonishment painted his features. A simmering, darkly satisfied look soon replaced it, transforming his face into something more raw and honest. Kagome accepted his anticipation, his hunger, not dissuading him from it. She endeavoured to encourage even more displays of emotion from him.

"You don't need to hold back," she murmured, accepting his searing kiss. "Tell me everything you've wanted to say to me since losing my memory. I don't mind."

Their energies twined once more, and the miko hooked her leg over his hip to anchor him against her without any seductive intentions. She merely wanted him close, and Sesshoumaru did not argue, burying closer to her the second he healed. Skin met skin, noses brushing.

In the hush that followed, Sesshoumaru took his lips to her ear and began talking.

End

#Sesskag #Sesshoumaru x Kagome #sesskag fanfiction #Inuyasha #Kagome Higurashi #Sesshoumaru

[feralnumberfive]

Why do u care what the ppl ship like chill out its a show about aliens and time travel its not real hun

Hiya anon, thanks for stopping by! I didn’t really want to reply to this at all and then I thought fuck it, the more I can share my view to get incest shippers off of my blog the better! 

Why do I care what other people ship? 

Let me make a numbered list to help you understand my feelings!

I can't control what people ship so I obviously know I can’t do anything over that!

The Hargreeves are siblings!

Luther Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves, Allison Hargreeves, Klaus Hargreeves, Five Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves, and Vanya Hargreeves are, you guessed it, siblings! 

Marcus Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves, Fei Hargreeves, Alphonso Hargreeves, Sloane Hargreeves, Jayme Hargreeves, and Christopher Hargreeves are, you guessed it again, siblings!

Basic math says that 1 Sibling + 1 Sibling in a relationship = Incest

Even though they are adopted and not blood related, it’s socially considered incest and in some definitions it truly is incest! 

You can also just simply leave it as they are adopted siblings so it’s incest (I sure do!)

Like chill out, it’s a show about aliens and time travel

Let’s do bullet points here instead!

Believe it or not this show is actually based on the comic series by Gerard Way called The Umbrella Academy (wow, who knew!) which also featured a relationship between Luther and Allison, but it also had a relationship between Diego and Vanya!

Boom, that’s incest!

The Umbrella Academy has pointed out incest twice in the show (yes you heard that right, the show actually pointed it out/poked fun at it!)

Where you may ask? Here in 2x05

And here in 2x10 (with Diego wording it as “our biological sister” means he considers the other Hargreeves as his biological siblings too (though we don’t know who their father is/it’s implied Hargreeves had something to do with their births but I don’t know how) and hence having a “Oh shit she might be my sister and I had sex with her/was in a relationship with her” moment)

Don’t forget it also includes super strength, projectile manipulation, reality manipulation, conjuring the dead into a physical beings again, lovecraftian tentacles coming through a portal in someone’s stomach, weather and sound manipulation, talking chimpanzees (though Pogo is the only one in the show), and full functioning robots that can do anything a human can as efficiently as an actual human!

Oh yeah, and aliens are a very real possibility and depending on whether you think they’re real or not, they’re real

I am very well aware that it’s a show and a comic book series, but thank you for the reminder!

It’s not real hun 

Let’s keep it at bullet points, shall we?

Like I just said, I’m aware it’s not real, hun. It’s obviously not real 

What’s real though is that besides the fact that it’s a fictional story it features tons of non fictional situations and scenarios in a (the) real world

It’s fictional pieces sprinkled into nonfiction. Yeah there’s people with superpowers and other aspects like that, but other than that everything is normal in that universe

Incest is one of those things that is nonfiction in TUA!

They obviously recognize that incest is bad. They recognize each other as siblings, and Diego recognizes them as biological siblings 

Which means that there’s a good chance that the others view each other as biological siblings too

On the previous post I made on this topic about not wanting incest shippers on my blog, someone commented on it that they have adoptive siblings and from the looks of it they definitely view relationships between adoptive siblings as incest too (they have no sexual relationships with their siblings)

Justin Cornwell, a.k.a. Marcus, and Brinte Oldford, a.k.a Fei, received fanart of someone who shipped Marcus and Fei together. Both Justin and Britne both expressed that they didn’t agree with the ship and that they were siblings, but eventually took that down out of being respectful of the fan’s view of the characters

I, however, don’t know the other actors views on the siblings and their relation to each other. Aidan made a certain post which in turn basically told us his view on the siblings and their relationships but I don’t want to dive into that right now and maybe if I’m asked about it later I certainly will but I feel like I’m on thin ice whenever it comes to talking about Aidan and plus what he said makes me uncomfortable 

I know it’s not real, but what I am going to keep real with you, chief, is that I’m not the only one who views relationships between the Hargreeves as incest. There are tons of people in the UA fandom who also believe that it’s incest

Now anon, I don’t know if you view relationships between the Hargreeves as incest, but assuming that you felt the need to ask me this I’m just going to assume that you do. 

If you don’t consider it incest, then why can’t I consider it incest?

Oh, and anon you finally made it to the end through my answer, which you probably think is all bullshit and you’re smiling like a feral chimpanzee at this reply. 

So, from me to you:

#thank you for the reminder to remind others again that I don't support incest in TUA or incest in general anon :] #now I'm going to watch my follower count and see if it goes down! #oh feel free to reblog this if you want to #could I have handled this better? you betcha #but I want to get my point across that incest shippers are not welcome on my blog #tua #the umbrella academy #umbrella academy #inc*st #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #number five #five hargreeves #ben hargreeves #vanya hargreeves #marcus hargreeves #fei hargreeves #alphonso hargreeves #sloane hargreeves #jayme hargreeves #christopher hargreeves #christopher the cube

[itsclydebitches]

Here's a quandary I've suddenly found myself in: where do you stand on writers deleting their own works, fanfiction or otherwise? I've had this happen to me on more than one occasion - I go to look for an old favorite and find it's since been deleted from whatever site I read it on.

On the one hand, I'm inclined to think that, "Sure. The author wrote it, it's their call. I don't own the work - I certainly didn't pay for it. It's their decision, even if it's disappointing."

But at the same time I can't help but consider the alternative - if I believe in death of the author (and I do), that an author's work fundamentally isn't solely theirs once it's been published, posted, etc., then it also seems wrong to have a work deleted. Stories aren't the sole property of their creator, after all.

But then I circle back. D'you think there are different obligations between authors and readers and the works being made in fandom space? I know if I had bought a book and the author decided they wanted it back, I would feel pretty comfortable telling them no, given I'd paid for it and whatnot. But that's a different world from fanfic and fandom space generally.

So. You're insightful Clyde, I'm curious as to what you'll have to say here (and to all y'all thinking about it, don't flame me. I haven't decided where I stand here yet - haven't heard a good nail-in-the-coffin argument for or against yet).

Val are you a mind reader now? I’ve been thinking about this exact conundrum the last few days!

(And yeah, as a general disclaimer: no flaming. Not allowed. Any asks of the sort will be deleted on sight and with great satisfaction.)

Honestly, I’m not sure there is a “nail-in-the-coffin argument” for this, just because—as you lay out—there are really good points for keeping works around and really good points for allowing authors to have control over their work, especially when fanworks have no payment/legal obligations attached. In mainstream entertainment, your stories reflect a collaborative effort (publisher, editor, cover artists, etc.) so even if it were possible to delete the physical books out of everyone’s home and library (and we're ignoring the censorship angle for the moment), that’s no longer solely the author’s call, even if they have done the lion’s share of the creative work. Though fanworks can also, obviously, be collaborative, they’re usually not collaborative in the same way (more “This fic idea came about from discord conversations, a couple tumblr posts, and that one headcanon on reddit”) and they certainly don’t have the same monetary, legal, and professional strings attached. I wrote this fic as a hobby in my free time. Don’t I have the right to delete it like I also have the right to tear apart the blankets I knit?

Well yes… but also no? I personally view fanworks as akin to gifts—the academic term for our communities is literally “gift economy”—so if we view it like that, suddenly that discomfort with getting rid of works is more pronounced. If I not only knit a blanket, but then gift it to a friend, it would indeed feel outside of my rights to randomly knock on their door one day and go, “I actually decided I hate that? Please give it back so I can tear it to shreds, thanks :)” That’s so rude! And any real friend would try to talk me out of it, explaining both why they love the blanket and, even if it’s not technically the best in terms of craftsmanship, it holds significant emotional value to them. Save it for that reason alone, at least. Fanworks carry that same meaning—“I don’t care if it’s full of typos, super cliché, and using some outdated, uncomfortable tropes. This story meant so much to me as a teenager and I’ll always love it”—but the difference in medium and relationships means it’s easier to ignore all that. I’m not going up to someone’s house and asking face-to-face to destroy something I gave them (which is awkward as hell. That alone deters us), I’m just pressing a button on my computer. I’m not asking this of a personal friend that is involved in my IRL experiences, I’m (mostly) doing this to online peers I know little, if anything, about. It’s easy to distance ourselves from both the impact of our creative work and the act of getting rid of it while online. On the flip-side though, it’s also easier to demean that work and forget that the author is a real person who put a lot of effort into this creation. If someone didn’t like my knitted blanket I gave them as a gift, they’re unlikely to tell me that. They recognize that it’s impolite and that the act of creating something for them is more important than the construction’s craftsmanship. For fanworks though, with everyone spread around the world and using made up identities, people have fewer filters, happily tearing authors to shreds in the comments, sending anon hate, and the like. The fact that we’re both prefacing this conversation with, “Please don’t flame” emphasizes that. So if I wrote a fic with some iffy tropes, “cringy” dialogue, numerous typos, whatever and enough people decided to drag me for it… I don’t know whether I’d resist the urge to just delete the fic, hopefully ending those interactions. There’s a reason why we’re constantly reminding others to express when they enjoy someone else’s work: the ratio of praise to criticism in fandom (or simply praise to seeming indifference because there was no public reaction at all), is horribly skewed.

So I personally can’t blame anyone for deleting. I’d like to hope that more people realize the importance of keeping fanworks around, that everything you put out there is loved by someone… but I’m well aware that the reality is far more complicated. It’s hard to keep that in mind. It’s hard to keep something around that you personally no longer like. Harder still to keep up a work you might be harassed over, that someone IRL discovered, that you’re disgusted with because you didn’t know better back then… there are lots of reasons why people delete and I ultimately can’t fault them for that. I think the reasons why people delete stem more from problems in fandom culture at large—trolling, legal issues, lack of positive feedback, cancel culture, etc.—than anything the author has or has not personally done, and since such work is meant to be a part of an enjoyable hobby… I can’t rightly tell anyone to shoulder those problems, problems they can’t solve themselves, just for the sake of mine or others’ enjoyment. The reason I’ve been thinking about this lately is because I was discussing Attack on Titan and how much I dislike the source material now, resulting in a very uncomfortable relationship with the fics I wrote a few years back. I’ve personally decided to keep them up and that’s largely because some have received fantastic feedback and I’m aware of how it will hurt those still in the fandom if I take them down. So if a positive experience is the cornerstone of me keeping fics up, I can only assume that negative experiences would likewise been the cornerstone of taking them down. And if getting rid of that fic helps your mental health, or solves a bullying problem, or just makes you happier… that, to me, is always more important than the fic itself.

But, of course, it’s still devastating for everyone who loses the work, which is why my compromise-y answer is to embrace options like AO3’s phenomenal orphaning policy. That’s a fantastic middle ground between saving fanworks and allowing authors to distances themselves from them. I’ve also gotten a lot more proactive about saving the works I want to have around in the future. Regardless of whether we agree with deleting works or not, the reality is we do live in a world where it happens, so best to take action on our own to save what we want to keep around. Though I respect an author’s right to delete, I also respect the reader’s right to maintain access to the work, once published, in whatever way they can. That's probably my real answer here: authors have their rights, but readers have their rights too, so if you decide to publish in the first place, be aware that these rights might, at some point, clash. I download all my favorite fics to Calibre and, when I’m earning more money (lol) I hope to print and bind many for my personal library. I’m also willing to re-share fic if others are looking for them, in order to celebrate the author’s work even if they no longer want anything to do with it. Not fanfiction in this case, but one of my fondest memories was being really into Phantom of the Opera as a kid and wanting, oh so desperately, to read Susan Kay’s Phantom. Problem was, it was out of print at the time, not available at my library, and this was before the age of popping online and finding a used copy. For all intents and purposes, based on my personal situation, this was a case of a book just disappearing from the world. So when an old fandom mom on the message boards I frequented offered to type her copy up chapter by chapter and share it with me, you can only imagine how overjoyed I was. Idk what her own situation was that something like scanning wouldn’t work, but the point is she spent months helping a fandom kid she barely knew simply because a story had resonated with her and she wanted to share it. That shit is powerful!

So if someone wants to delete—if that’s something they need right now—I believe that is, ultimately, their decision… but please try your hardest to remember that the art you put out into the world is having an impact and people will absolutely miss it when it’s gone. Often to the point of doing everything they can to put it back out into the world even if you decide to take it out. Hold onto that feeling. The love you have for your favorite fic, fanart, meta, whatever it is? Someone else has that for your work too. I guarantee it.

So take things down as needed, but for the love of everything keep copies for yourself. You may very well want to give it back to the world someday.

#fandom #fic things #mymetas #never any easy questions on this blog huh? lol

[frobin]

Okey serious question here. How much do you actually believe that Oda ships Frobin? Like do you think he actually have like doodles/sketchs of them in a pairing kind of way? like for the strong world film riding the motorbug? (Personally i would love it to be true but he has stated one piece isn't about romance in that way)

Hey there anon! Thank you so much for your question and I hope I can answer it seriously enough. Also once more sorry for the late response. I felt like a question like that needs some research and that is what I did these last few days.

So... I think I'll start with the tl;dr because that way people can read that and ignore the rest.

So, long answer short: I 100% believe that Oda has one or more sketchbooks with drawings of his characters that are absolutely self-indulgent. I am 98% sure that he has drawn Franky and Robin in a romantic way at least once (and supported the ship). I am 80% sure he still is shipping FRobin.

Little disclaimer: I actually have no idea if any of this is true. I pull everything in my arguments out of my own experiences and knowledge and since I'm not a 46 year old Japanese Mangaka my perspective might be WAY OFF.

argument - reason- example - conclusion... behind the cut (or in the google doc)

So, why do I think that Oda has a secret sketchbook?

Simple answer is that he is an artist. He is drawing a lot and no artist will publish everything. That can have multiple reasons like imposter syndrome or because the artist thinks it’s not good or interesting enough or they just forget. There are even more reasons I forget and every person has their own.

For Oda I can imagine two big reasons as to why he would keep secret sketchbooks.

First: He is a horndog. You can skip this part if you don’t want to read about it, to the second reason.

Anyway, we know thanks to answers in the SBS, the way he likes to draw big-breasted women and how some of his characters are classified as perverts that he can be considered one too.

Let me show you a few of a few lewd SBS questions he likes to answer in a funny way:

Chapter 228, Page 46

D: How are ya, Odacchi? I know how much you like getting butt-naked, so this must be a favourite season for you. <3

O: Yes, yes. I just LOVE getting completely naked. In the summertime, after I take a bath I just run STRAIGHT OUTSIDE!! And when the girls' softball team running on the sidewalk looks over at me, they say, "Yup, it's really summer now!!" ... AS IF!! I'D GET ARRESTED!!!

(x)

Chapter 433, Page 68

D: If Lady Robin can use her Hana Hana Powers to make any part of her body sprout somewhere else, does that mean she can do it with her ample bosom as well? "Nyurin-zaki" (Breast Sprout) Boy, I'd like to take a hit from that sometime... P.N. Ero Ero no Mi Devil Fruit User.

O: "Ichirin-zaki" (Single Sprout) "Nirin-zaki" (Double Sprout) "Nyurin-zaki" (Breast Sprout) Very clever!! NO IT'S NOT!! STOP THAT!! I'm sure she CAN do it though ♡

(x)

Chapter 798, Page 64

D: Oddachi, I'll give you a pornographic book, so please answer my question. Sanji won't allow anyone to waste food, but what will he do if a woman does so? P.N. Smoker's Cigar

O: I think he would grab the plate and eat it up. Now please give me the pornographic book.

(x)

Nowadays I’m sure there is a focus on those lewder questions compared to the beginning because that is what 13 year old boys laugh about and we all know that is Oda's main demographic (of course).

I think a very good picture of that is given by Tekking101 in his breakdown video of SBS Volume 100.

“Let’s get diving into these questions (...) now, this is a huge moment. I mean, not many Manga manage to reach 100 Volumes, Okay? Now I know Oda usually starts these off with questions relating to boobs and things that don’t really… you know, aren’t really relevant but you know, this is a big celebration so we’re gonna dive right into it. I bet the most important things that we need to know about the One Piece Story are right here in these pages, okay? I printed them out. That is how important this is. So let’s start off, shall we? Epic voice, Barry!

‘Mister Oda, there is a UFO over there with huge big-breasted beauties on it. That memorable 100 Volume of the SBS is about to begin.’

[pause] Yeah, like the first five of these are all related to boobs in some way. You know what Oda? Sticking true to your guns! Godspeed, Sir Oda. Godspeed.”

(end at around 2:30)

So, Oda is a man who likes beautiful women and who draws.

Coming to the conclusion that he will draw his own characters in suggestive poses, naked and even doing adult stuff is not hard.

Obviously he would not show these sketches just around. He would probably keep them in a secret sketchbook that he keeps at a safe location. Maybe his wife and some close friends know about it? Maybe it is his and only his little secret.

I don’t think it would be unlikely to learn about this years into the future, maybe the next generation of Anime Fans will hear about this.

And it would not be the first time that something like this happened.

Not that long ago the daughter of Osamu Tezuka - groundbreaking Mangaka, known for his works of “Astro Boy”, “Kimba the white lion” and many more - found his adult Furry art. Source; Japanese article;

It’s a fact that many Mangaka did indeed start their career with art of the more risque kind and/or as doujinshi artists.

So again, I have no doubt that Oda, a known pervert, has one or more secret sketchbooks with „the p0rnography“ in it. Is there only hot stuff in there? Not necessarily.

The second reason to keep a secret sketchbook would be to collect information in there, that could be considered canon but he is not willing to use it in the Manga. Maybe they are not important enough or will be used later.

What am I imagining here? Anything that could be considered too weird for the normal sketchbook but isn‘t too risque. Funny things that might still not be „appropriate.“

Like a sketch of the male Strawhat ding-dongs with the sizes beside it. All the lewd jokes the fans did about Luffy's stretching qualities? I’m sure Oda thought about them too and drew that in the past if he had the time and it made him laugh enough.

But also maybe there are scenes in there that never made it in the Manga. The Strawhats interacting with each other in their daily lives, ideas for colorspreads and maybe chapter-titles. Oda probably has noted/sketched down a lot of unofficial stuff somewhere.

Another example, even an artist like Oda himself would have needed to exercise drawing two people kissing. Why not use Characters he thinks that might work out together?

Why not Franky and Robin? I would imagine he sketched up a few panels of Franky and Robin having a romantic date, going shopping together in Dressrosa, having a conversation that we never got to see because it was too on the nose.

Which brings us to the second point of me being very sure that Oda had drawn FrankyXRobin at one point.

I’m sure in those sketchbooks there is at least one drawing of them doing anything couple-related together. Again it does not have to be downright nasty but it could be them holding hands, kissing or even just Robin leaning onto Franky while reading, like all those fanarts that exist out there.

It’s not hard to imagine. Even for other Characters I think that is possible

And there might even be proof for that idea. The sketch of the Strong World movie you also mentioned, anon. The one movie that can be considered canon is Strong World. It was basically written/directed by Oda. Shiki the antagonist had an appearance in the Manga.

This sketch is drawn by Oda. Robin is holding onto Franky.

Can it be read as romantic? Yes. Can it be read as Robin holding onto Franky because there is nothing else to hold onto? Also Yes. But couldn't she just have used her power to keep herself secured on the bike without holding onto Franky? WELL YES. Could Oda never have thought in these circles like I do right now? I hope he did not because I hate it and I don’t wish it upon him.

In the movie Robin is NOT holding onto Franky. Now the really interesting thing - that is neither proof pro nor anti FRobin - is that we can see the sketch provided by Oda as a “between the scenes”.

In the movie Strong World the old trio is collecting information at the Pirate assembly. The next time we see them they use the Batta GT-7000 to slowly approach the destroyed village, which had been ravaged by the animals, and start to look for their friends. No need to hold onto Franky and no need for Brook to lean back. They are looking around.

The sketch is clearly not the same scene as the one we see in the movie.

In conclusion the drawing is indeed a between the scenes drawing. And yes if there exists one, who is to say there aren’t more?

Talking about Animal-Bikes...

Is there any meaning about the fact that in the opening scene (that is part of the talked intro after the opening ‘We Go’ - a huge thanks to antiherofangirl, ccb0nnet, JFL_Estudios and Maems, over at twitter!) Franky and Robin build another grasshopper-based vehicle? Maybe not but I still feel like it’s quite a callback.

Where did the idea to put this in the beginning come from? a) an editor had the idea inspired by Strong World; b) maybe it’s another sketch that Oda provided.

Neither seems very far-fetched in my opinion.

So yes, I am very sure that Oda has drawn things that we would consider FRobin.

Now to the last point (the first being Oda having a secret sketchbook, the second me arguing that Oda might have drawn FRobin).

As I said in the beginning I’m very sure that at one point Oda did and kinda that he still does ship Franky and Robin. Because even though every Interaction of two characters can be depicted as romantic or platonic, Oda used ROMANTIC TROPES with Franky and Robin.

They have never kissed on screen but we had

finishing each other's sentences

coordinated clothes

one using the others lap as pillow

hand on cheek caressing

and we can’t forget that Robin had answered Franky's invitation to ride on another animal-themed bike with a heart.

Edit: I didn‘t say anything about „no romance in OP“ so ask again if you want me to talk a bit about that. Sorry!

Those are things an author of Oda's level would not write or draw without being aware about how teasing this is. He has to be aware that every single line he draws will be analyzed to the end of the universe and back. People earn money by saying their opinion and interpretations about the Manga on Youtube.

These interactions are not something outlandish like “There was once an Anime Scene in which Robin was wearing something blue and exactly 28 episodes later Franky was wearing something violet and then 39 episodes later they both stood beside each other for exactly 69 seconds.”

Whenever I think about these facts, things that are not about interpreting but are factual, black ink on white paper but also about the little things, about how Frank and Robin help each other to become better, how they support each other… I want to say YES! ODA IS 100% on board! While in reality I’m 80% sure and 20% of me is wondering if I’m not actually analyzing too much into it. If maybe he really is abandoning ship. Maybe I will become the person who will curse his name and throw my Mangas and fanfictions in an active volcano?

I don’t know and it’s impossible to say what is going to happen.

And with that I've concluded this answer, and it only took me around 2k words and four days.

#FRobin #One Piece #One Piece Meta #Odas secret sketchbook #One Piece analysis #Adult themes #Notreally Frobin #long post #2k words #ask #modpost #kon #boy this was something #sorry about any mistakes

[thepetulantpen]

(Happy Valentine’s Day! Here’s my annual Saimota fic. As usual, keep an eye out for saimota fanart by @fancy-kryptonite​)

The anticipation leading up to Valentine’s Day is persistent, all-consuming, and, above all, irrational. It builds and builds past the point of overthinking and well into sleepless nights.

Holidays are always like this- a sort of performance anxiety to be happy, to make a day special. In a sense, it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. He knows it can’t possibly be perfect, so he ruins it for himself before he starts.

It reaches a breaking point in the form of him mentally throwing up his hands, tired of debating with himself. There have been enough grand, somewhat ridiculous gestures over the last few years. No one is expecting him to do anything elaborate, least of all Kaito- who Shuichi finds sprawled out on the grass, a pile of books abandoned at his side. Unconcerned with the holiday a few days away.

“I was thinking we could try something normal this year.”

Kaito raises his head, not confused by the non-sequitur, but mildly offended- insofar as any of Kaito’s expressions can be called mild.  “I thought our other dates were normal?”

“Simple. I meant simple.” Shuichi can’t help smiling- only Kaito would consider scavenger hunts and secret love letters normal. He sits down beside Kaito, trying not to crush any of the books, borrowed far past their return date. “Easier to plan.”

Kaito looks relieved, and ecstatic- the latter of which is not particularly comforting. “Right, right. I’ve got the perfect thing.”

That’s fast, even for Kaito. Shuichi tries not to let it get to him- he hasn’t thought of anything specific yet. “Well, I figured we could each pick something- you take the morning, and I’ll take the afternoon?” Hopefully, that’ll give him enough time. “If you don’t mind. I mean, I could go first, if you’d rather.”

“Nah, I’ve got it covered.” He pats Shuichi on the back, with his usual lack of awareness of his own strength. “I won’t disappoint you, sidekick.”

I’ve really got to talk him into a new title.

He certainly sounds confident, but Shuichi has never known Kaito to not sound confident. He’d been thinking coffee or movies, but if Kaito has something perfect, then Shuichi has to step up his game. There’s only a day or two left- what could he do in that time?

“Shuichi? Did you hear me?” Kaito leans into his line of sight, waving his hand in front of Shuichi’s face. There’s no telling how long he’s been doing that for. He must take Shuichi’s expression for an apology, as he repeats himself, “I’ll text you the details. It’s a surprise, so don’t try to detect it, alright?”

Oh, good. Another thing for me to obsessively think about it. 

“I won’t, I promise.”

Kaito doesn’t look convinced. Shuichi can’t say he is, either.

…

Despite Kaito’s insistence that Shuichi would guess before they got there, the escape room ends up being a pleasant surprise. The waiting room is charming, filled with props to take pictures with and a massive winners board, and the hallway is filled with unassuming doors labeled with puns related to their theme. Their room is, fittingly, made out to be the scene of an old-timey murder- Shuichi and Kaito, wearing the deerstalker hats hung near the door, being the detectives called in to solve it.

It only occurs to Shuichi about halfway through that he’s spending Valentine’s Day rifling through blood-stained documents about a fictional murder while Kaito yells nonsense guesses to word puzzles from across the room. He wouldn’t have it any other way.  

“What if we arranged the dominos in a star shape? Is that anything?”

Shuichi glances up from the nearly illegible pages that have been unceremoniously shifted to his responsibility and finds Kaito juggling a tin of dominos and an armful of paintings that had once been on the walls. Those, at least, were meant to come off. 

“Uh,” Shuichi hesitates, caught between about three puzzles at once- one of them being Kaito, in general, “It couldn’t hurt?”

Kaito grins, obviously happy to do something. The paintings are scattered across the table, now crowded with other clues jumbled beyond recognition. From a glance, Shuichi can see that the lines painted on might actually make a star- but he doubts someone’s been assigned to watch the camera and wait for them to artistically arrange the dominos.

Kaito is not stupid. He’s practically an astronaut and, aside from that, he can be brilliant with people, far more insightful than Shuichi. It’s just- he tends to think in the abstract, approaching problems in a way no one else would. Meaning that the people who made these puzzles would never arrive at the solutions Kaito picks out. 

It doesn’t help that he refuses to use their hints, under any circumstances. The employee running the room had only egged him on by telling him no one had ever solved it in time without using a hint- Shuichi had accepted their fate, after hearing that. 

The intercom clicks on, the false cheer of their game master giving them a five-minute warning. Kaito scoffs, confidence never dulled, but the tension in his shoulders betrays him- his hands, over the dominos, have stopped, apparently realizing it’s not getting him anywhere. 

Shuichi had told himself, while they were waiting for the room to reset, that he wouldn’t take over. It’s supposed to be a casual game between the two of them, no pressure to win. Plenty of people fail these things, and they still have fun.

He has a feeling Kaito is not one of those people. 

“We still have plenty of time,” Shuichi assures, surprised to sound so confident, “I think the dominos are color-coded. Take these,” he hands off one of the papers, still running through combinations on the others, “and give organizing them a shot.” 

Kaito gives him a mock salute, but rises to the task. As predicted, he moves through the dominos quickly- giving Shuichi time to hurriedly unlock the next two safes. He’s had those figured out for a while, having thought he would have more time to guide them to the right answer. 

The solutions themselves are not terribly difficult. Nothing like solving crime, in any practical way, but they force him to slow down and connect all the pieces, adding up how every seemingly unrelated item fits together. 

“I’ve got it!” Kaito grins, the triumphant click of dominos set in the right position- a key to another code. “What’s next?”

“It corresponds to the filing cabinet,” he’s practically on autopilot as the clock ticks down, the flash of red numbers in his periphery, “I’ll take the desk drawers.”

It puts them shoulder to shoulder, both rapidly setting combinations and trading half-shouted numbers, unnecessary given their closeness. Kaito finishes first, so he gets to watch over Shuichi’s shoulder as he guesses the last clue. 

For a second, it looks like he’s gotten it wrong, that he’s failed them both, before the lights flicker dramatically. They all go out, save for a hidden projector that lights up one wall with the image of a wailing ghost- ah, he’d forgotten they were supposed to be avenging some spirit. He’ll admit, he wasn’t listening very closely during the introduction, distracted by Kaito’s grin as he took in the room. 

Kaito jumps about a foot in the air- clearly, he hadn’t been paying much attention either. Shuichi takes his arm, hoping to keep him from stepping on any of the discarded paintings.

“The necklace,” Kaito yells over the sound effects, wide eyed, “she wants the necklace!”

On impulse, Shuichi dives for it, digging through the pile they’ve accumulated, and tosses it to Kaito. He doesn’t present it to her so much as he holds it up as if it’s a crucifix he could use to exorcise her. The projection, unlike a real ghost, thankfully doesn’t mind his rudeness.

“I may finally be at peace.”

Figures that Kaito would be the one to bring peace to the ghost. It makes Shuichi smile, even as the lights are turned on abruptly, bringing an anti-climactic end to their adventure. The clock is paused at 17 seconds- not exactly a record to brag about, but he’ll take it. 

On their way out, Kaito elbows him to get his attention. “So, how long did you know the answers?”

Shuichi smiles and says, “Not long.” Which, judging from his expression, Kaito translates to “since we got in the room.”

Kaito doesn’t seem bothered, not like Shuichi thought he might be. If anything, he looks delighted. 

“We made a fantastic team, as usual. Under my guidance, of course.” He messes up Shuichi’s hair, a habit he didn’t bother kicking once they started dating. “With our smarts combined, we could do anything. You could be the first detective on the moon, you know?”

“I don’t know, maybe my calling is in paranormal investigations,” he teases, pretending not to notice Kaito’s grimace, “we could go on ghost hunts together.”

Kaito scowls, and Shuichi presses on, baiting the hook, “Unless you’re scared?”

“No man, nor beast, has ever bested me.” Kaito’s frown is close to genuine indignation, offended that Shuichi would consider him below ghosts. “Ghosts don’t even have bodies. I’ll take on a ghost, any time, any day.”

Luckily for Kaito, Shuichi thinks it’s unlikely he’ll ever have to deliver on that promise. “We’ll save that for another weekend, then.” He picks up the pace, leading the way, for once. “I’ve got something a little more romantic than a ghost hunt, this time.”

If Kaito looks inordinately relieved, Shuichi is generous enough not to notice.

…

Most people can tell when Shuichi is overthinking something. Most people know that answer is “always”. 

Kaito can tell when Shuichi is thinking of overthinking something. The calm before the storm, the buzz of energy that has him tapping his foot incessantly while staring into space. It started well before their date, carrying into the weekend of Valentine’s Day.

It all hits in the form of an over-packed backpack and piles of printed maps, stacked in the backseat. Shuichi has a schedule, complete with an annotated map of their hiking trail and final destination.

“We should make it there just as it gets dark enough to see stars. It’ll be a perfect view.”

The emphasis is obviously placed on perfect, Shuichi’s smile just a bit forced. Kaito gives the map a once-over- credit where credit is due, it looks as close to the perfect spot as you could get- and gives Shuichi a smile. “I’m sure it’ll be great.”

He may not be a detective, but it’s not hard to figure out that anything Shuichi comes up with will be incredible. It’d be difficult to have a bad time with Shuichi; any time spent with him feels like time well spent. The beautiful hiking trail is only a bonus. 

Kaito wouldn’t be surprised if Shuichi’s plans were flawless, every second mapped out. Every funny looking tree, every set of tracks in the ground- all set up for Kaito to notice, or for them to use as landmarks. Shuichi could say he’s set the stars on a timer, and Kaito might just believe him. If anyone could do it, it’d be Shuichi.

The sky, however, seems to have other plans. 

The clouds start rolling late in the afternoon and stick around stubbornly after the sun sets, filtering reds and purples through grey film. At certain angles, Kaito can see the moon in their gaps, but there’re hardly any stars persevering through. Dark grey shadows move over what might have otherwise been a fairly bright sky, now dimmed to a heavy static. 

It's remarkable in its own right, patterns of grey standing out starkly against the abyss of the night sky. It feels like the clouds are the only thing between them and limitless space, a simple barrier to surpass. Kaito only feels more drawn to it, eager to peel back the layers to see the stars for himself.

“I checked the weather,” Shuichi mutters, miserably, “I had three backups, and I was sure this one would be clear skies. I even looked up the constellations you could see from here-“

“That’s alright.” The grass has started to cool rapidly in the darkness, no springtime warmth remaining to greet them. Kaito lays out his coat to sit on, instead, and leaves Shuichi the more generous half. “It’s a great view, like you said.”

Shuichi squints at him, suspicious. “You can’t see any stars.”

“Stars aren’t the only thing I came here to see.” Kaito puts an arm around Shuichi’s shoulders, pulling against his side. He’s never embarrassed to be close to Shuichi, but he’ll admit he likes it best when it’s just the two of them, no distractions, no threat of self-consciousness. “It’s perfect.”

Shuichi looks down, hiding a smile. “Next you’ll be dropping cheesy lines with star metaphors.”

“There’s nothing wrong with star metaphors!”

He should be offended when Shuichi laughs at that, but he can’t bring himself to pretend. Shuichi’s laugh is reward enough- even if, objectively, star metaphors are among the best romantic gestures.

He’s still got work to do, as Shuichi sits silently beside him, staring at the galaxy print of Kaito’s jacket to avoid looking at the sky. It’s obvious he’s under the impression that he’s failed somehow, which just won’t do. As the hero to his sidekick, it’s Kaito’s responsibility to let him know he’s wrong- just, perhaps, not in those exact words.

Kaito nudges Shuichi and leans forward, craning his neck to get the best view of the clouds above them. “You’re underestimating the sky. Look, there’s always something beautiful to see.”

He points at the formations of clouds, shapes made of negative space against the moonlight. Their tops are highlighted by the escaping light, scattering over the uneven, cottony surface. Shuichi’s head tilts to follow him- it reminds Kaito of the escape room, focus taking over his expression. It’d almost feel out of place here, beneath the clouds with nothing of substance to analyze, if Kaito wasn’t used to seeing it all the time, for anything from figuring out a new coffee machine to spoiling a detective show by guessing the killer early.

“That one looks like a bear,” Kaito takes Shuichi by the shoulders, directing him to the cloud in question, “See? The other clouds are like the salmon it’s chasing.”

Shuichi doesn’t manage to sound very convincing, but he tries his best when he agrees, “I think I see it.”

“Hasn’t anyone ever told you you’re a terrible liar, Shuichi?”

Shuichi elbows him in retaliation, turning away from the stars to look up at him. He’s going for disapproving, but Kaito can see through him, far easier than seeing through the cloud layer. 

Somedays, it’s hard to believe that Shuichi bothers to hang around with him. Kaito considers himself good company, but for Shuichi? He’s not sure he qualifies- and yet here they are, under the stars. Or clouds, as it is. 

“One day, I’ll bring you to see the stars up close. We’ll go high above the clouds and into the night sky.” Kaito holds him closer, no longer interested in looking at the sky. “Just the two of us.”

“I’d like that.” Shuichi leans more into him, pushing for room on Kaito’s jacket. When he smiles this time, he doesn’t hide it. “I’ll have to consider space for next Valentine’s Day.”

He doesn’t sound serious, like he doesn’t completely believe Kaito will be able to pull it off. That’s alright- he has plenty of time to prove him wrong.

Kaito’s not being completely honest, anyway. Space isn’t his ideal Valentine’s Day- and it’s not an escape room, or star-gazing, either. It’s by Shuichi’s side, wherever that might be. If it’s watching reruns of mysteries he’s memorized the solutions to, or teasing him for his choice of black coffee, or just laying on the grass, staring up at the same sky.

The promise of another Valentine’s with Shuichi makes it all worth it. Kaito doesn’t need much else- though, he’s still looking forward to sweeping the clearance section of chocolates.

#Valentine’s Day #saimota #shuichi saihara #kaito momota #danganronpa v3 #pseudo-sequel to my other saimota fics #this is very rough but ill probably do another round of edits before i post on ao3 in a few days