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#option 2 shave my head
roguelov · 2 years
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So due to a one offhanded comment, a spur of the moment call, and luck of cancellations I will now be getting my hair dyed today
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clownboy-yeehonk · 22 days
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Truly the only downside of having a pixie cut is in the event of a mental breakdown I simply don't the option of cutting my own hair or giving myself bangs like the whole head is bangin
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alltheirdamn · 3 months
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DECLINED | Mechanic!Joel x f!reader
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Summary: You're on a cross-country road trip when your tires blow, and you're forced to get them fixed at a small town mechanic shop. When your card declines, you only have one other option to get your car back. Rating: 18+ Explicit Word Count: 3k Warnings: Pre-outbreak AU, mechanic!joel, sex for favors, oral sex (f + m receiving), blowjob, deepthroating, cum eating, fingering, squirting, semi-public sex, unprotected piv sex, size kink, creampie, dirty talk, pet names, joel being a disgustingly nice gentleman, porn with absolutely no plot A/N: I saw this gif float across my pinterest and had a terribly fun idea... so here it is. Enjoy a lil fun ;)
PART 2 | Masterlist | Ko-fi
“S’all fixed up now,” Joel said, walking into the waiting room.
You had been waiting a few hours to have your alignment fixed and tires replaced, and now you could finally breathe a sigh of relief. You were on your way through the small town headed east towards Tallahassee when both of your back tires blew out on the highway. You were lucky not to cause a crash and thankfully found a local mechanic shop only half a mile off the road. 
“Thank you so much,” you exhaled as you stood up and stretched your legs.
Joel rounded the counter to the register, typing up the work order to charge you out. Wallet in hand, you waited for the cost, praying it wouldn’t make a dent in your bank account. You only budgeted so much for the road trip, and this definitely wasn’t in the budget.
“Alright, ma’am, lookin’ like it’s gonna be around $500 for everything. Shaved some off just for the hassle you been through,” Joel smiled.
Shit.
“Uh, okay. Great.”
You reluctantly handed over your card, praying it would be enough. Joel swiped it on his machine followed by a loud beep that clearly meant DECLINED. You let out a shaky breath, fishing through your wallet for another card.
“Shit, try this one,” you said.
Joel nodded, his brows furrowing a bit when it also beeped in the same tone. He slid your card across the table, cocking a brow as if to ask, ‘Got another one?’
“Fuck,” you laughed nervously. “Okay, how ‘bout this one?”
Another card. Another decline. How the fuck were you going to get out of town now?
“Sorry, ma’am,” Joel sighed. “No payment means no car ‘m afraid.”
You ran your hand through your hair in frustration, trying to come up with something. Glancing up at him, you took in his broad frame covered by a simple black t-shirt that seemed to hug the planes of his chest perfectly. You hadn’t even noticed the patchy beard or kind grin that he donned so well earlier. Maybe…
“Look, I gotta get out of here tonight,” you pleaded. “Is there anything I can do to just get my car?”
Joel crossed his arms over his chest, his biceps looking much bigger in that position. With a frown turning down his lips, he shook his head.
“Afraid not, ma’am.”
“Anything? Please, I'm begging you.”
He considered you a moment, his eyes raking over your figure. You felt your cheeks warm at that look, knowing what he might be insinuating. If that’s what it took to get your car and get the fuck out of this town, then why not?
“Anything?” He repeated.
“Yeah, I guess so. I’m pretty fucking desperate right now.”
Joel came around the corner of the counter, crowding you until your neck craned up to meet his eyes. Your heart thrummed in your ears, warmth blossoming in your stomach the longer he stared at you. 
“Desperate lil’ thing, huh?” He teased.
Backing away from you, Joel walked to the shop entrance and slowly turned the lock. He looked back at you as he flipped the sign to CLOSED as if testing your judgment. You gave him a meek nod, never letting your eyes off him as he stalked toward you again. His finger ran up your forearm, catching on the sleeve of your top and tugging it lightly.
“Follow me, darlin’.”
That sentiment, followed by the twang of his accent, was enough to make your knees buckle, and you followed him like a dog in heat. Joel led you back into the heart of the shop, scraps of tools and car parts littering the makeshift garage. And right in the center of it all was your car. Leaning against the hood, he patted the metal, beckoning you over. You dropped your purse on the workbench and walked toward him on shaky legs. Joel spread his legs a bit wider as you approached, his fingers wrapping around your belt loops to pull you in close.
You were a breath apart now, just the barrier of clothes separating you. Joel’s hands snaked around your waist and firmly palmed your ass through your jeans. You let out a small yelp as his fingers dug into the supple flesh, kneading and massaging until your eyes drifted shut at the feeling.
“You pay off all your debts this way?” His voice dropped an octave, and you felt the bulge in his jeans prodding against your stomach as you leaned closer.
“Fuck off,” you scoffed. “Wasn’t planning on my car taking a shit out here and definitely wasn’t budgeting for it either.”
“Hmm,” he mused. “Ain’t got a boyfriend to give you some cash to help?”
“If I did, I wouldn’t be out here tryna fuck you for my car,” you quipped.
A grin split across his face at your defensiveness, as if he enjoyed you being a brat. You weren’t trying to be— honest to god—but you desperately needed to leave this town, preferably with your car. 
“Y’sure are a bratty little thing,” he said, tugging you closer.
“Why don’t you stop talking so much and fuck me so I can get the hell up out of this small fucking town?” You grumbled.
Joel raised one of his hands to grip your chin, steadying your gaze on his. Sliding his thumb over your lips, he coaxed your mouth open and urged you to suck on his finger. Without breaking eye contact, you swirled your tongue over the skin of his thumb before wrapping your lips around it.
“Christ, darlin’,” he exhaled. “Might just let you suck my cock and send you on your way.”
You released it with a pop, a trail of saliva dripping from your bottom lip. Reaching down, you massaged the bulge in his pants, letting out a soft gasp. He was massive—bigger than expected. He let out a small chuckle as if reading your mind, bucking his hips against your touch.
“You’d give me my car for a little blowjob?” You questioned, squeezing his cock tighter.
“S’nothing little about me, darlin’.”
“Aren’t you just full of yourself,” you rolled your eyes.
Your fingers danced over the zipper of his jeans, tugging it down as he helped pull his cock free. You peeked down to catch a glimpse of it, your eyes growing wide. His cock was girthy and thick and definitely had no shortage of length, either. Precum leaked from the tip, and you wet your lips at the idea of trying to fit it all in your mouth.
“Y’gonna suck it or what? Car ain’t gonna pay for itself.”
“You gonna give me my car after?” You tossed back.
“Maybe,” he grinned. “Those tires might cost you extra.”
“We’ll see about that,” you smirked.
Sinking to your knees, you pulled down his jeans and underwear until he adjusted himself at the tip of your lips. You wrapped your hand around the base of his cock, squeezing softly as you guided it into your mouth. Stretching your lips wider, you swirled your tongue around the tip, basking in Joel's groan as you did so.
“S’fucking perfect, darlin’. That mouth feels fucking amazing.”
 You took him deeper, moving your mouth in a rhythmic motion until you felt his hand come down to grip your hair. He held you steady as he snapped his hips back and forth, pushing his cock further down your throat. Sputtering around him, you dug your nails into his thighs as leverage while he continued fucking your throat.
“That’s it, darlin’,” he rasped. “C’mon now, take this fuckin’ cock down your throat.”
Opening your throat wider, you swallowed every thrust as tears streamed down your cheeks. Joel was relentless with his thrusts, your nose brushing against the curls at the base every time you took him deeper. You could sense he was close to the edge, so you dragged your tongue against the base of his cock with each stroke, spurring him on further. It elicited a primal growl deep within his chest, and within seconds you could feel the warmth of his cum sliding down your throat. His cock twitched inside your mouth as he came down from his high, and you hummed as you swallowed every last drop.
Using the grip on your hair to pull you off, you sat back on your heels, coughing and heaving to try and catch your breath. Joel looked down on you with heavy lidded eyes and a smug grin as if to taunt you. Cupping your cheek, he slid his thumb against your skin and brushed away the rolling tears.
“Open,” he ordered. “Show me.”
You quirked a playful smile, leaning your head back as you stuck your tongue out to prove you swallowed it all. Slapping your face softly, Joel let out a soft chuckle.
“Atta girl.”
You brushed the remainder of your tears away, wiping the makeup from your eyes, and you stood on wobbly legs. Smoothing down your shirt and jeans, you crossed your arms over your chest and cocked a brow.
“I think I earned my car back,” you insisted, your voice hoarse from how hard he fucked you.
“Hmmm, y’think so?” Joel questioned. “I think I deserve a taste of that pussy.”
You shoved at him playfully, rolling your eyes. 
“In your dreams, cowboy,” you laughed. 
With his pants still hanging down, Joel spun you until your ass was pressed against the hood of your car. Working at the button and zipper of your jeans, he shoved them down and pulled your legs free until your bare ass was pinned to the cool metal. Joel gave you a lopsided grin and shoved you further onto the hood.
“I wouldn’t be a gentleman if I didn’t return the favor, darlin’.”
“You don’t need to do that,” you said, your voice shaky.
“Oh, but I want to,” he argued. “Gotta see how sweet you taste.”
Sliding down, Joel situated himself between your thighs, tugging your calves up to rest on his broad shoulders. He gave you a teasing kiss on your inner thighs before delving in, his tongue flicking at your sensitive bud. You careened back against the hood, your back arching as his mouth suctioned around your clit. Crying out, you carded your hand through the brown curls of his hair, anchoring his face against your wet cunt as it pulsed against his mouth. Joel plunged his tongue inside you, forcing another whine from your lips.
“Fuck!” You cried. “Right there! Oh my god, yes!”
He hummed in satisfaction, bringing his fingers into the mix as he opened you up, curling them against that sweet spot inside you. Keeping his mouth on your clit he worked in tandem with his fingers until that coil inside you wound tighter and tighter. With one more curl of his fingers, your orgasm surged through your body, forcing a gush of liquid to stream out of your wet cunt. Joel sat back in awe, staring at your glistening folds as your body trembled from the release, your juices covering his beard and mustache. 
“Fuck babydoll,” he grinned. “You a squirter, too?”
You laughed awkwardly and watched as he removed his two fingers and brought them to his lips. Sucking them into his mouth, Joel groaned as he tasted the remnants of your orgasm. You knew you could squirt—it was your own dirty little secret—but something about seeing him covered in your juices made you want more. Tugging him softly with your calves on his shoulders, you urged him back to your soaked entrance, silently begging for another round. 
“Gonna cover me in your juices again, darlin’?” Joel smirked. 
“Mhmm,” you whined. 
“Drench me babydoll, let’s see it.”
Joel’s mouth was on you again, lapping up the juices leaking out of you until you were crying out for him. He didn’t let up as he sucked your aching clit between his teeth, his tongue working at the bud in earnest. He pushed his fingers back into you, your cunt pulsing violently each time he curled them. Slipping a third finger in, he stretched you wider and moaned against your clit as your body tensed with another orgasm. Another rush of liquid made it past his fingers, soaking his mouth and chin. You could feel it trickle down the seam of your cunt, drenching the hood of your car as you thrashed against it.
“Christ, Joel,” you mumbled, your head lolling to the side. 
He rose to his feet, wiping a hand over the hair covering his chin as he smiled at you. You sat up slightly, positioning yourself on your forearms as you watched him slide his jeans further down his legs. You were already in this deep; you might as well keep going. Spreading your legs a bit wider, you raised a finger to beckon him closer. 
“C’mon cowboy,” you teased. 
“Y’really need that car, huh?” He smiled, lining his cock up to your entrance. 
“I really do,” you whimpered, nodding your head vigorously. 
Joel eased himself inside you, inch by fucking inch, until he was fully seated at the base of his cock. You both groaned in unison, his cock sliding in and out of you easily from all the juice leaking from you. Crossing your ankles behind his back, you pushed him deeper, mewling at the sensation of the tip of his cock brushing against your cervix. You could feel that stinging stretch of your cunt as he picked up his thrusts, your ass sliding up the car each time. 
“Shit, babydoll,” he growled. “S’fucking tight around my cock.”
“You feel so good, Joel,” you hummed. “Please, I need it harder.”
Listening to your pleas, Joel planted his hands on either side of your face, pistoning into you with brute force. He bent down, sucking and biting the skin of your neck until you were crying out from the pain mixing with the pleasure. You rolled your hips to meet him thrust for thrust, your cunt fluttering against his cock each time. That blinding orgasm was on the horizon as your muscles tensed up for its release. Running your hands up under his shirt, you dug your nails into his back muscles, dragging them down his tanned skin. Joel groaned into your ear, his hips snapping against yours harder and faster.
“Oh fuck! Oh fuck!” You sobbed. “I–I’m gonna fucking cum, Joel!”
“Yeah, babydoll? Fuckin’ soak me with it.”
He pulled out at the last moment, a heavy stream of liquid pouring from your cunt and coating your inner thighs and Joel’s cock. Without wasting a second, he drove back into you, picking up the pace despite your body still shaking and dripping from your orgasm. You could feel your tears rolling down the sides of your face, that warmth still coursing inside you. Joel’s thrusts grew erratic and off-rhythm, and you sensed his orgasm was pushing him to the edge. 
“Y’gonna let me fill that pussy, darlin’?” His lips grazed the shell of your ear as his voice sent shivers up your spine.
“God, please,” you cried.
With one…two…three final strokes, Joel was grunting and painting your insides with thick bursts of his cum. You both lay there limp and fucked out for several moments, catching your breath and chuckling as reality settled back in. He slipped out of you and drew his pants back up his legs, his eyes roaming over your sweaty body. With one hand, he tugged up the zipper of his jeans, using the other to push the cum leaking out of you back into your wet cunt. 
“Gotta send you off with some sort of parting gift,” he laughed.
You couldn’t help but laugh, too, adjusting yourself and sliding off the hood. Joel bent down to ease your pants back over your thighs and hips, helping with your own zipper as you stood awkwardly in front of him. Joel leaned in to kiss your cheek before walking to the corkboard hanging from the wall. Retrieving your keys from one of the hooks, he offered them to you with a kind smile.
“I’m free to go?” You asked, reaching for them. 
He pulled them away, shaking his head with a teasing grin. You pouted sarcastically, opening your hand and waiting.
“One kiss, and we call it even, babydoll.”
You grabbed either side of his face, pulling him in for a hungry kiss. You coaxed his mouth open, teasing your tongue over his, tasting your arousal still lingering on his tongue. Joel deepened the kiss, tangling his free hand in your hair to anchor you closer. Pressed up against him, you found yourself thirsting for more but knew you had no obligation to stay. Sucking his bottom lip between your teeth, you pulled away reluctantly and snatched the keys from his hand. 
“Thanks for the new tires, cowboy,” you grinned. 
Joel dazzled you with another gorgeous smile, the lines around his eyes creasing as he gave you one final nod. You squeezed your way out of his embrace, making your way to the driver's side door. He followed you over, opening it like the gentleman he was, waiting till you were situated inside. Leaning in for one more kiss, he lingered a moment too long before breaking away.
“Safe travels, darlin’. If you ever need some work done, y’know where to find me.”
You dug your keys into the ignition, letting the car rumble awake. Joel shut the car door with one final smile and watched you reverse out of the mechanic shop. Giving him a small wave, you turned onto the street and back toward the highway with a soreness creeping up your thighs.
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galedekarios · 1 month
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minsc & gale
recently i've been doing a playthrough taking minsc along during the limited amount of time we do get to connect with his character in the game and i have to say he's growing on me in a way he didn't in previous titles.
i wanted to take the opportunity here to write a short post about his relationship with gale because that, too, is something i found myself enjoying despite the (too) few interactions that we have between them.
minsc's initial thoughts about gale
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Player: How are you and Gale getting along? Minsc: I do not wish to speak of the wizard. Minsc: I could not have said it better myself. - Player Option 1: Gale's great - what's your problem with him? Minsc: He came to me one night with a little book of mischief - full of words and their meanings. Minsc: 'Posterior', he says. 'Can you say 'posterior'?' I refused! Minsc does not need to know the language of wizards. Player: 'Posterior' isn't wizard-talk - it's another word for 'butt'. Minsc: It is an inferior word. Far too long to use in a battle cry, which is where a 'butt' belongs. Minsc: Gale would do better to educate himself in the ways of sword and steel than to throw these pointy words at Minsc. Minsc: Ai, yes. Gale also owns a cat. A cat with wings! That is most unnerving for poor Boo. Player: You should give him a break - he's only trying to help. Minsc: Never! If he is not careful, Boo will shred his books and use them as bedding! - Player Option 2: Did you know that he has an explosive magical orb in his chest that could destroy a city? Minsc: WHAT? Minsc: That is a thousand times more interesting than anything that has ever been written in a book. Minsc: GALE! MY GOOD FRIEND! WHERE ARE YOU? MINSC AND BOO WOULD LIKE TO HEAR ABOUT THE EXPLODING.
they may not start off on the right foot, but with gale's genuine interest in other people's cultures as well as his perception and easy-going nature that changes:
sorcerous sundries
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Minsc: Minsc has never trusted places such as this. Too much of a wizard's power can be simply packaged and picked up. devnote: Grumbling as we make our way through the shelves of Sorcerous Sundries Minsc: Well, picked up by all but Minsc. When he touches the many delicate little jars, oh how the wizards shout and stare! devnote: Revealing that his objection of Sorcerous Sundries is not in fact a deep philosophical belief that wizards have too much power - they just make him feel stupid and awkward when he pokes at their things Gale: Fear not, Minsc. You have a wizard at your side who positively encourages such curiosity. You'll fit right in. devnote: Reassuring Minsc: Obliged, wizard. Should we find our way to a weaponsmith, Minsc will rough you up a little - so that you too can fit in. devnote: Warm, comradely, would genuinely be doing Gale a favour
i feel like it truly speaks to gale's character that he doesn't dismiss minsc here - neither his feelings of inadequacy nor his innate curiosity about the things he perceives as wizardly.
it would've been very easy for gale - the wizard prodigy, the former chosen, to archwizard - to act the part of the haughty scholar, akin to the arrogant wizards that minsc describes in this banter, looking down on him, shouting at him, but gale doesn't.
gale reassures minsc, encourages him, telling him he'll fit right in. it reminds me of the way he treats karlach and fostering her interest in books and reading. another pair of seemingly polar opposites that still find a connection. i do think gale is quite natural at this, despite his long time spent in isolation.
and minsc does appreciate it - his tone changes to one of warmth, one of camaraderie - and i think this is also when minsc's perception of gale changes: from the annoying wizard to someone he sees as a companion and friend.
rashemi traditions
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Minsc: Gale. Minsc worries you might send a fireball up his butt, with all of this stringy hair in your face. Gale: Is that why you keep your head shaved? I assumed it was a custom of some sort. devnote: Curious, referring to Minsc's origins Minsc: Oh, no! Most warriors of Rashemen wear long battle-braids, weighed down with stone. Minsc can show you, when next we camp? Gale: Thank you, but I'm more wizard than warrior. I'm not sure my scalp would stand up to such a plaiting. devnote: Very politely declining
i like this banter for several reasons: i think not only does it show the progression of their relationship with minsc offering to show gale the traditions of his homeland, gale also shows the same curiosity he shows many different cultures and ways of life, same as he does with lae'zel for instance and githyanki culture.
when he declines minsc's offer, he does so politely, without insulting minsc's traditions, putting the onus on himself instead. he's the wizard, not the warrior.
house of hope
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Minsc: Gale! You will perhaps able to explain where Boo has not - what exactly is the difference between a devil and a demon? Gale: A fascinating question, one that boils down to which criteria we choose to apply. Are we speaking about the physiological? Theological? Etymological? devnote: In teacher-mode - up for an in-depth, intellectual discussion Minsc: Eh. Just how-to-kill... -ical. devnote: Non-plussed, echoing Gale's ending every word with 'ical' Gale: Oh. Then for your purposes, they are exactly the same. devnote: Disappointed
this banter genuinely made me laugh. again, i like how it shows the progression of their friendship, to the point of where minsc goes from finding gale annoying to imitating his speech. and gale doesn't put it beyond minsc to have an 'in-depth, intellectual' discussion... even if he is disappointed by the end of their banter, realising that minsc's priorities are... elsewhere.
wychlaran
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depending on your party composition and who you take with you, minsc can also call gale his wychlaran.
The Wychlaran, meaning "wise old women" in the ancient language of Halardrim, also known as the Witches of Rashemen outside their lands, were the spiritual leaders of Rashemen, communing with the spirits and guiding the souls of the Rashemi people.
minsc does use it, too, to describe a special bond and a sense of duty and protectiveness to the people he ascribes this title to. he did so in bg1 with dynaheir and in bg2 with aerie.
elminster
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Minsc: It must be difficult for Gale to imagine great Elminster a-courting. Writing poems. Doing... certain... deeds. Gale: Long before my time, thank goodness. That's not an image I care to dwell on. Minsc: Ugh. It is difficult for Minsc to think of, too. Let us speak no more of it. Minsc: ... Minsc: Of Elminster and the sex, I mean.
another banter that did genuinely make me laugh despite the seriousness of the situation, especially given the bond that elminster and gale share as well, which speaks of paternal feelings on elminster's part that come with a certain sense of responsibility, as well as gale's admiration, but also often exasperation with his former mentor.
on a more serious note, minsc offers great insights in his interactions with gale and gale's story:
mystra and the vremyonni
The vremyonni or Old Ones were an arcane brotherhood in Rashemen. Men that were arcane spellcasters in Rashemen had two choices, exile or to join the vremyonni. Many vremyonni were kept alive for eons by longevity magic. Vremyonni were expert weaponsmiths and magic item creators. On very rare occasions, vremyonni would fight in the defense of Rashemen. Vremyonni used secrets of magic that even the Witches of Rashemen did not use, destructive spells forbidden among the wilds of Rashemen, in case such magic was needed. The Running Rocks harbored secret strongholds of the vremyonni. All vremyonni wore masks.
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Minsc: Gale reminds me of the vremyonni of my homeland. The man-mages of Rashemen. Minsc: While the girl-folk go on to rule as wychlaran, Weave-touched boys were hidden away. Trained to work their craft in silence and secrecy. Minsc: It is an old custom, not well-observed. In truth I thought it born of caution, after some catastrophe wrought by wizardly men-folk of old. Minsc: Now I wonder if it was not done to hide them from Mystra, and the snares she sets for young and prideful boys, hm? Minsc: Though this suggests that Mystra has never tempted a witch into foolishness. Not that I would blaspheme by suggesting otherwise. Minsc: I forget why I began this long and winding story. Yes Boo - we have been spending too long around the wizard.
i think this is a very interesting banter, especially since it's also only marked to trigger if gale agrees to return the crown to mystra.
it's easy to dismiss this banter, laugh it off as just another instance of minsc being minsc, but i think it's important to consider it within the context of game canon and what has been shown to us.
it's a story and everything within a story is there for a reason.
another great insight from minsc comes if gale is pushed towards the crown by the player:
gale and godhood
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Minsc: Who among us has not been spurned by a lover? But a word of advice, if Minsc may be so bold: Minsc: Let the wizard lick his wounds. Write some rickety rhymes, and weep most manfully into his hamster's hide. Eh - his cat's hide. Minsc: But... his boasting is unbecoming. 'Claim godhood', he says? Will this make him any less a man with a half-mended heart?
again, minsc does at times share great insight into other characters and he does so here again with gale:
will this make him any less a man with a half-mended heart?
i think it quite accurately goes straight to the crux of what makes it so very easy to push gale towards godhood: he is hurt. he feels abandoned. by his goddess. by his former lover. both as a mystran and on deeply personal level.
he is drifting, seeking something to hold his head above the water. if it's not the protag's love or friendship, it will be the crown.
anyhow, i never expected to write this when i first learned that minsc would be a companion, but i truly did enjoy him and his interactions with gale in particular.
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clockwayswrites · 8 months
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Neon Adjuration - Start
The bike sputtered to death on a cliché middle of nowhere American road. It might have well been straight out of a movie set with the rows of corn, gold light, and nothing else around for miles.
Jason was less than impressed.
After nearly an hour of pushing his bike and with the idyllic light quickly fading he was even less impressed. It wasn’t as if he didn’t have options. His insurance came with roadside assistance (he thought), he could give in and call a sibling to steal the Batplane and come get him, or a corn field wasn’t the worst place he’d ever slept. He had options, just none of them were really appealing.
Recognizing that the feeling was stupid didn’t make calling for help feel any less like giving up.
The corn field had to have rodents. As he had pushed his bike, they had turned from carefully manicured rows into wild, unmanaged looking things. Jason had enough sharing a bed space with rodents as a street kid to want to do it again. Jason was probably about ten minutes away from giving in and calling Dick when he saw the glow.
It was neon salvation looming out of the oppressive darkness.
The cyan light spread the furthest, but Jason could also catch magenta from where the sign was peering around the edge of what must be the shop the sign was connected too. The cast of the cyan light made the corn feel otherworldly, and Jason pushed his bike slightly faster. More of the sign was revealed with each step, carefully crafted letter by carefully crafted letter.
Jason nearly sagged in relief. Not only was it finally, blessedly civilization, but it was a mechanics shop. ‘Fix-it Freddy’s’, the sign cheerfully proclaimed. It sat next to just the sort of building that looked like it might hold up to the claim. The base structure was probably from the late 40’s, that magical time of growth when the war and dust had both faded, but it had obviously been altered and changed and repainted hundreds of times. Just from the light of the neon and the one, lonely white flood light above the large roll up door Jason could see a myriad of colors. The current one seemed to be an already fading cyan to match the sign.
Praying that shop either had someone still working or cheap security and a lock he could jimmy, Jason leaned his bike against his tired leg and rang the bell between the roll up door and the man door. His finger was barely off the buzzer before the aluminum panels shuddered and groaned. Creaking with all of the years in it, the door rolled up.
Hanging onto the chain was, well, not exactly what Jason was expecting to find out in the corn fields. They were young, Jason’s or close enough. The black hair was wild, long in the middle and pushed around from a long day of working with engine grease and oil but shaved close on the sides. The way the neon light caught their eyes practically made them glow. Their smile was almost concernedly easy. “Can I help you?”
“Yeah,” Jason said and then had to clear his throat and try again. “Yeah. I guess you’re Freddy?”
They laughed, tossing their head back. Magenta light brushed along the length of their throat. “Nah, Freddy’s been dead for nearly thirty years, not that it would stop him from working. I’m Danny, this is my place now. Why don’t you roll your bike in and we’ll take a look at it, okay stranger?”
“Jason,” he said reflexively.
“Jason,” Danny repeated with that same easy smile.
--
AN: Aaaaaaand Moody Monday check! (Can I get all the days of the week? Let's see! 2 down, 5 to go... fingers already taped together.)
Masterpost I no longer tag, visit the masterpost to subscribe!
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okkalo · 5 months
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Could you do a Chifuyu Matsuno from Tokyo Rev scenrio of his girlfriend flustering him by telling him he looks cute with his hair up (like when he was at the bath house with Takemichi in episode 13 of season 2)?
hi anon! thank u for the request :) first time writing for fuyu my beloved so i hope i did him justice and i hope you enjoy!!
chifuyu x fem! reader
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“oh my god,” you voiced, immediately catching chifuyu’s attention as he turned his eyes over to you. he immediately knew what drew those words from you after seeing your awe-struck eyes on his tied-up hair.
“stop it, y/n,” he mumbled, already embarrassed just by your gaze alone, and that much was evident in the way his cheeks heated up. he looked even more adorable with his small pout paired with his blushed cheeks, his tied-up hair pulling everything together and finishing it with a nice bow of perfection.
“baby, you look adorable.” he knew it was over once you started talking with your baby voice, treating him as some adorable child. despite it, he stood guard as you came up to him with slow steps and your hands out to readily cup his cheeks. maybe he wasn’t completely opposed to being babied…
“i’m not meant to look adorable,” he muttered, looking down at you as you cupped his cheeks, your eyes filled with adoration and love. man, his cheeks were hot.
“but you do,” you retorted with a small giggle, your hand sliding up his skin to brush along the shaved side of his head. your eyes that were trained on his new hairstyle finally flickered down to meet his green eyes, making his heart stop as you now pointed all of your attention at him. “you should wear your hair like this more often.”
he didn’t respond, not knowing how to when your gaze was completely on him, admiring the way he looked. he took your suggestion, however, thinking that he could maybe get used to being babied if you gave him this type of attention.
“you’re so cute, fuyu,” you giggled once more, visibly seeing his brain malfunctioning at your compliments. you couldn’t help but lean in, hands pushing down on his cheeks to make his lips pucker so you could place a sweet and short peck on his lips.
chifuyu knew his best option was to grab your wrists, stopping the further embarrassment you could’ve given him by removing your touch from his cheeks. his brain was still blank for a verbal response, so, instead, he leaned forward to give you an actual kiss that countered your earlier peck. it was his way of returning your affection and showing how much you had fogged his mind with his own adoration for you.
your small smile against his lips as he kissed you was all he needed to decide that, yeah, he should definitely wear his hair up more.
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unedited. thank you for reading!
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roonyxx · 3 days
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Healing Love: Part 2
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Summary: You have a normal life as a nurse, and you are content with it. But then a storm called Dean Winchester rolls into it and you get swept away by his charms. But secrets linger and threaten to drown you both.
Pairing: Dean x Witch!nurse!reader
Word count: 2455
Chapter warnings: angst, wounds and medical stuff (i am no professional and have no idea what the real treatments are), fluff.
support me :)
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Deviders made by @firefly-graphics, give her some love!
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The day at work seemed to last forever but eventually your shift ended and you hurried home, you jumped in the shower to shave, scrub, wax, all of it.
By the time you fed Quinn and are all dressed up it is seven.
You check your phone, no news. Which is not abnormal, he might be driving.
You sit on your porch while waiting for Dean to show up.
Seven thirty rolls around and no news.
You dare to send him a little text.
“Hey, it was seven at my place, right?” you send to him.
No answer. It’s not even read.
Quinn can feel your sadness at being stood up and lays his furry head on your lap.
“Perhaps he’s just late.” You tell him while stroking his ears.
Or he stood you up…
Around eight you go back inside and take off your heels. You really thought he liked yesterday’s kiss…
Was it a bad kiss? To you it was the best kiss ever. But maybe not to him? Is that why he ghosted you?
A smile blooms on your face when you hear your phone ringing, but as soon as it came it fades at the unfamiliar number.
“Damn spammers.” You mutter while hanging up.
Was it a little high hopes on your side that Dean wanted to go out on a date with you? Maybe… he is extremely beautiful. But he was the one who suggested it. It made no sense.
The number pops up on your screen again and you grunt while you hang up. Only for the number to pop up again.
“Jeez this one is motivated.” You sigh.
You stare at the number, maybe it’s work?
Not like you have plans for tonight anyway. You pick up.
“Hello?”
“Is this Y/N?” A strange voice asks you, but there is something similar about it.
“Yeah? Who is asking?” You frown.
“My name is Sam, I’m Dean’s brother, we need your help.” He sounds in a hurry, or worried even.
“My help?” That couldn’t be good…”Where is Dean?”
“He got hurt, badly… I know you don’t know me but- but he needs you. I will send you coordinates, could you come to us?”
“If he’s hurt badly he needs to go to a hospital.” You say, hurt again? Yesterday the cut, today this…
What are they involved in?
“That’s not an option, please Y/n, I- I don’t think he will get through the night without you.” He sounds so desperate.
Rubbing your face you grab your big bag for emergencies. “Send me the address, I will come.”
“Thank you” he sighs with relief “I sent the text, you text me when you’re here. Hurry please, Y/n.” And then he hangs up.
Walking with your big bag to your car you check the coordinates.
Who uses coordinates? You put them in your gps and see it’s just on the edge of town. You speed down the roads to get there within thirty minutes.
You get out of your car and frown, there is nothing but an old factory and woods here.
You send your text to Sam, telling him you’re here.
The big metal door of the factory opens with a loud creak.
“Y/n! Hurry, he’s in here.” Sam says from the opening.
You hurry down the little steps and follow Sam inside and look over the railing with wide eyes.
This isn’t an old factory…
The magic inside you immediately reacts to the sigils that are hidden in the walls. This whole building is magical, powerful. Your magic eases against the sigils with a soft hand, reassuring them you are not a threat. Once they are soothed they stop oppressing you like an intruder.
Inside is a very big room with many lights and machines you don’t understand. A big world map table lighting up in the middle.
And on that table is an unconscious Dean, bleeding heavily from his stomach and his face is covered in blood from a cut you can’t see.
“Oh god…” You run down the few stairs and get to the table.
“What happened!” You scream at Sam while you get to work.
Ripping open your bag you get out your stethoscope and listen for his heartbeat. It’s there but weak…
Bloodpressure is too low, he lost a lot of blood…
“What is his blood type?” You ask while cutting open his shirt.
His stomach… It’s shredded, this needs a surgeon, not a nurse.
“His b-bloodtype uhm” I can see Sam shaking in the corner of my eye, “we’re both O.” He eventually says.
“Sam…”
“I can’t explain what happened, he got c-cut open. Please… do something.”
“I’m not a surgeon.” You pant, the panic and magic rising within you.
He needs my magic but…
But the way he gets hurt every day, no hospital, the magic of this place...
Your eyes water while looking at his unconscious face, of course he has to be a damn hunter…
Hunters murdered your friend ten years ago. You swore to her to never get near a hunter again, it was the last thing she asked of you.
You have plenty of catheters and bags to make a blood transfusion. It’s not at all like the protocol in the hospital but it will have to do.
You can’t let him die.
“Sam, you need to get me some tape, water, a bowl, a lighter, and all the bandages you have. Go now.”
Sam nods and runs out of the room.
Giving you the chance to be alone with Dean.
You put on your gloves and start cleaning his stomach as much as possible to see the damage.
Definitely werewolf claws…
You grunt, “I can’t stitch this much shredded skin…”
You look over your shoulder to make sure Sam isn’t here and take off your gloves to start rubbing your hands together.
They heat up and start glowing with a golden light, you make your hands hover over his wound.
It is impossible to heal it all, your magic untrained and rarely used. But you will do what is possible.
You know that with training you would be able to heal a lot of things, but using it is very dangerous and it drains you. A lot.
You focus on healing the cells of his intestines, healing every precious organ that is inside, then you focus on the peritoneum, the bag that seals the intestines.
Sweat is forming on your brow and you wipe it away with your sleeve to prevent it from falling inside his wound.
Dizziness is creeping in and you push your magic to knit his stomach muscles back together and heal the edges of his wound, you can stitch them when they are less shredded.
You are panting heavily by the time your magic runs out. But you check his wound and are satisfied to see his muscles are perfectly closed.
You thread your needle, black spots are creeping into your vision but you push through.
Sam comes running in with everything you asked for.
“Tell me what to do.” He says.
“Check his head, find the cut and tell me if it’s deep, clean up as much as you can.”
He nods and does exactly that while you stitch his layers of skin back together.
“It’s not deep but bleeding hard, it’s just on the edge of his hairline.”
“Keep pressure on it and use butterfly bandage to put it back together. It should hold.”
I finish with my stitches and put a big bandage over his stomach, then wrapping a compression bandage around his entire waist to keep it all in place.
You move next to Sam to check Dean’s head, it is indeed not very deep and what Sam did will be sufficient.
You go to Dean’s arm and put in a catheter, you give him some antibiotics to fight of any bacteria that got in his open wound and a shit ton of pain killers, then you move to Sam.
“Sam, sit, he needs blood.”
You grab his arm and start drawing blood to make a transfusion.
After Sam donated the maximum he can, you make shift a pole to hook the blood bag so it can slowly enter Dean.
“You’re both very lucky to have O.” You sigh, exhaustion is starting to claim you but Dean can’t stay on the table, he needs to be comfy. You give Sam just a little time and hand him a cookie to get his sugars up.
“Can you carry him?” You ask Sam.
He nods “I can. W-will he be okay?”
“He can’t stay on the table. I don’t know yet, I gave him a lot of pain meds, he should wake up in a few hours, or his heart can stop from the trauma.” I say as my eyes stay on his chest, that’s slowly moving up with each breath he takes.
Alive. He’s alive.
Sam carefully picks Dean up. You stay close, making sure the blood bag stays above Dean’s head.
Sam walks him through the enormous building and reaches what you presume is Dean’s bedroom and puts him in the bed.
You arrange his pillow and cover him so he doesn’t get cold, then grab a chair and sit next to his bed.
You take off your smart watch, turn on the sound and wrap it around Dean’s wrist, a faint beeping noise sounding that follows the rhythm of his heart.
“Get some rest Sam, I will be here, if his heart stops, my watch will make an alarm noise, I will stay here, making sure he’s okay.”
“I want to stay here.” He argues.
“I can’t have you in the room when he crashes, which is a chance. Go to bed, try to rest. You will need your strength when he wakes up.”
If he wakes up…
Sam gives a little nod and reluctantly leaves.
You slump in the chair and watch Dean breathe. The exhaustion will claim you soon, so you learn forward and touch his chest, putting your very last magic into his heart. The weak rhythm of his heart starts to pick up,  with your magic it became stronger.
With the reassurement that he won’t die, you stop fighting the exhaustion and pass out.
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“Y/n?” you hear your name being faintly said, but your eyes won’t open just yet. Your body feels as if it is submerged in deep dark waters, every movement feels heavy and hard.
“Y/n?” your name is repeated, and you can feel yourself rising up to the surface of consciousness.
Your eyes peel themselves open and made contact with two spring forest green eyes.
Dean.
Dean!
Your eyes jump open and you reach his side.
“You’re awake.” You gasp, you check the watch around his wrist and see three hours have passed, his heartbeat and blood pressure are not perfect yet but they are good enough.
“How do you feel?” You ask him while taking off the now empty blood bag from his catheter.
“Not great.” He winces with a small smile, “But seeing you definitely helps.”
He still looks very pale.
“Pain?” You ask him while getting some more painkiller in a needle and putting it in his catheter.
He nods.
“This will help.”
He carefully lifts the covers to see his stomach, all wrapped up. “The last time I looked here I saw inside myself… I thought-“ he swallows hard and looks at you, “I missed our date.”
You can’t help but chuckle, “You almost died and you’re thinking about our date?”
“I was looking forward to it.” He defends.
“Me too.” You softly whisper.
“This isn’t what I had in mind as a date.” He lowers the cover again, “How did you get here?”
“Sam called me urgently, saying he needed my help and let me in. Good he did, I managed to help you, the next weeks will be hard, Dean. We will see each other a lot more. You talked about me to Sam?”
The smile he gives you is far from weak, “To see you a lot more doesn’t sound bad at all. I did… I was excited to tell him about you.”
You give him a smile back, blushing at how he wanted to tell his brother about you.
How you ever doubted for a second to not use your magic to heal him.
You would risk it all just to see him smile.
“What was your idea of a date?” You ask him to keep his mind, and perhaps your own, off how close he came to dying.
“Something cheesy, like a picknick in a field with a pretty sunset. Dropping you back at your place after we had a great time and then, then I would kiss you again.” He says.
You smile, “So you’re a romantic guy, huh?”
“Very.” He grins and tries to lean towards you, only resulting in him hissing.
“Careful!” You say and help him adjust his position by putting your arms around his naked shoulders and tugging gently on his pillow.
“That’s the second time you ripped of my clothes, you know if you want to see me naked sweetheart, all you have to do is ask.”
“You’re such a flirt.” You smile at him and realize how close your faces are together, you glance down at his lips.
“I regret not kissing you tonight.” He whispers against your lips.
“Tonight isn’t over yet.” You whisper back.
He smiles and closes the gap between you two. Kissing you deeply.
You carefully cup his face, kissing him back.
He moans when your tongue brushes against the seam of his lips, asking for entrance, which he grants.
His hand comes up to brush your cheek. He tilts his head to the side and deepens the kiss, more moans spilling out from his mouth.
You’re panting against him, your hands slipping in his hair as you get lost in him.
A harsh hiss breaks you apart and you see that he tried to pull you closer, resulting in hurting himself. You slowly peel yourself away from Dean.
“You need to rest,” you pant, your lips swollen and wet from his kiss, “No excessive moving for you for at least two weeks.”
“The idea of taking a nurse on a date is much sexier than in real life.” He grunts as lays back down more comfortably, “No excessive moving, so no kissing?” he gives you the biggest puppy eyes, almost as cute as Quinn’s.
You blush and say “Only kissing is okay. Calm kissing.”
“I can survive with calm kissing,” he smiles then winks, “For now.”
You blush even harder and smile.
“Rest Dean, you need it. I will be here.”
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Forever Tags 2024: @jay-and-dean @flamencodiva @snowlovespie @awkward-and-indecisive @hobby27
Dean tags 2024: @akshi8278 @pink-sparkly-witch @verytoadpapersoul @eevvvaa @muhahaha303 @alwaystiredandconfused @deansimpalababy @globetrotter28
Healing Love tags: @deans-spinster-witch @kr804573 @suckitands33 @bitchykittenconnoisseur @brightlilith @snowayumi
send me an ask if you want to be on any of my tag lists! (or if you want to be removed)
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grison-in-space · 5 months
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sorry I know this was not your point in the intersex post but I was wondering how you deal with your facial hair? I'm a cis woman and have lots of chin and facial hair (not to mention absurd body hair, as well as progressive hair loss on my head) and it's been pretty devastating for my self esteem. I have never been a beauty and now that chronic illness and age is catching up to me I have a hard time not feeling subhuman (the debilitating anxiety does not help).
My doctor insists I don't have PCOS and that my hormones are normal after multiple tests and 2nd opinions I've gotten have said the same. I tried laser and it seemed to make it worse, and I liked electrolysis and did many sessions over six months but it's not affordable to me at the moment and it seems it's all grown back? But it's been a few years so maybe it's just new growth. I am hoping to restart the electrolysis if I ever get close to having a comfortable financial situation again lol.
I find shaving it feels awful, the stubble is painful and I have a five o clock shadow like 2 hours later, but spending 30 minutes plucking every day is also not fun. Waxing just always rips off my skin and misses enough hairs to be annoying, even when I've gotten it professionally done.
It's absolutely driving me mad but it feels like I have no options to do anything about it.
I am so sorry, Anon: the chin and neck hair hits me in a bad sensory place as much as or more so than the visual side of it, so I compulsively pluck it as it appears. (I pretty much ignore everywhere else.)
My experience with laser hair was that it at least lightened and softened the hairs that were produced where I had it as a teenager, which makes plucking feel less necessary. Occasionally I contemplate one of those at home laser hair kits, but I've never actually gotten around to grabbing one.
That said, the level of androgenization you're describing is absolutely high enough to be worth seeking care for. Check whether your insurance has provisions for gender affirming care. You may also be a good candidate for spironolactone (for the thinning hair) or HRT, particularly if you're post menopausal. You're probably still going to be grappling with hair until you can do another electrolysis or laser session, but those should help you with keeping facial hair from coming back.
Have you seen a dedicated endocrinologist? It's also worth seeking an expert opinion, because the specific suite of symptoms you're describing certainly do sound like something unusual is going on whether or not it's PCOS.
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fishandshesmygills · 5 months
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carolldesign · 1 month
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👨🏻 Male facial hair set 👨🏻
This set contains:
👨🏻 A 9-swatch 2D shaved head texture in different tones of black, brown, auburn, grey and blonde for males. 👨🏻 A 18-swatch thin and groomed eyebrows in different tones of black, brown, auburn, grey and blonde for males. The texture comes in 2 options: plain brows and left brow double cut out. 👨🏻 A 9-swatch very soft male stubble in different tones of black, brown, auburn, grey and blonde. 👨🏻A 9-swatch grown male stubble with moustache in different tones of black, brown, auburn, grey and blonde. 
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All files are available for download exclusively on The Sims Resource for the Barbershop collection.
➡️ Download shaved head hairstyle
���️ Download brows
➡️ Download stubble
➡️ Download grown stubble with moustache
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For $6 off (20% off ) your annual subscription including cool perks like no ads and waiting time to download your fav things and download basket! More instructions how to redeem it are on my linktree and in my highlight stories on IG❤️
Choosing my code allows me to continue creating for you - thanks for supporting me ❤️
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I use an array of CC from different sources. For my list of creators I use - refer to my WCIF page:
✨ click here✨
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gospelofme · 2 months
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A Rambling Essay about Crosshair
I feel like there are lots of characters like Crosshair in Star Wars. Characters that portray themselves to be unfriendly assholes, but are using that to protect a vulnerable, traumatized inner self.
When we meet Crosshair in season 7 of The Clone Wars episode The Bad Batch, he’s an asshole. He and Wrecker start a fight when Cody is injured (Cody is the only “reg” Crosshair has respect for, but I’ll get into this another time). In the episode, A Distant Echo, he brings up the fact that Echo could be dead, or a traitor. He goes so far as to suggest just leaving Echo for dead since he is “just a reg”. This upsets Rex, which was his intention in my opinion, and Crosshair ends up getting punched in the face for it. While this was an important aspect to remember, Crosshair could’ve been more gentle about it. Instead he was arrogant and dismissive, he meant to be cruel with his remarks. This is asshole behavior.
Skipping ahead to The Bad Batch series. When Order 66 comes through, he actively tries to kill Caleb (Kanan). We know the others didn’t have their chips activate, due to their defectiveness (later we do have Wrecker’s activate, but only after a head injury). But Crosshair’s did, partially at least if not fully. He still tried to be part of the squad (not initially reporting Hunter for disobeying Order 66) until his chip’s influence was strengthened. Once that happened, he became loyal to the Empire and thus began the era of Crosshair being their enemy. What he did during this time wasn’t his fault, as he was being controlled by the implanted chip.
However, I wish to draw attention to the episode Reunion in Season 1 of The Bad Batch. Crosshair is injured by the engines of a Star Destroyer activating and burning his face. We were left with three options here.
One: the chip was destroyed by the injury, since it was on the right side of his head. This would result in its removal.
Two: the chip is intact, but has been damaged and may not be fully functioning.
Three: the chip is intact and still functioning as normal, since the injury seems to be just scarring and largely focused on the surface of his skull.
Reason one would bring us to the realization that any action Crosshair was doing post-injury was of his own free will. This is further solidified when Hunter and Crosshair are arguing in the season 1 finale, Crosshair revealing that he had had his inhibitor chip removed a long time ago. He does refuse to tell Hunter when he did this. His hair could’ve hid the removal scar easily, but the procedure would’ve left him with a bandage and a shaved portion of his hair. The others would have noticed. That makes it logical to think the chip was removed when Crosshair was receiving treatment for his injury. But this is also unlikely since I don’t see the Empire removing their source of control from Crosshair.
This brings me to the only option of the chip still being in place and Crosshair just lying to Hunter to make him feel like a failure. I feel like he did this to Hunter for the same reason he told Rex that he would’ve left Echo for dead because he’s “just another reg”. He’s trying to get the other to believe he is just an asshole. Irredeemable.
Later in Kamino Lost, Crosshair is still unwilling to renounce his loyalty to the Empire, but he’s also not actively trying to kill his former team. He even saves Omega at the end, knowing he was the only one who could’ve made that shot.
The latter half of Season 2 is where we start to see the real Crosshair come out. His interactions with Cody and Mayday are turning points for him. Mayday’s murder is the trigger he needs to sever his loyalty to the Empire. Crosshair goes through some serious torture and is traumatized as a result. This shatters the protective shield he had built around himself (likely since childhood). Before, the only ones he had willingly allowed in was Hunter, Tech, and Wrecker. Later Echo was included. He is still refusing to let Omega in, but this will likely change at the end of the series. He is still suffering through this experience, even though he’s rejoined his team. He’s refusing to admit his fears, the shaking of his hand is enough for Hunter and Wrecker though. They don’t seem to press this as much, but I don’t think any clone trooper knows how to deal with mental health and trauma (as they were supposed to be “immune” to the effects of battle fatigue/stress/PTSD).
He’s not the same Crosshair he was when we met him, but he’s trying to act as if he is. He has gone through being a loyal member of Clone Force 99, to feeling betrayed and abandoned by them. He becomes loyal to the Empire, until he is abandoned (on Kamino) and betrayed (by Mayday’s murder) by them.
I found it interesting that he still tried to be loyal to the Empire after they abandoned him on Kamino. He still tried to be a good soldier. He still tried to please them. It made me wonder if this is what he was like as a child. Trying to get others to like him or be pleased with him. But due to the obvious animosity between Clone Force 99 and regular clone troopers, this was likely something he’d never achieve and he had to accept that. Thus he walled up the hurt he felt and actively tried to keep others at bay with an asshole attitude.
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itsnatt09 · 1 month
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(Tw for self-harm and abuse)
I just had a really weird ask show up, and instead of airing it (because it implied both that we choose to be gay, and that trans people wouldn't be trans unless we were m*olested as children) I'm gonna talk a bit about my long journey with identity.
Even though I spent a lot of my childhood being pretty confused about myself, I didn't hear the word 'Transgender' until I was an adult in 2009. That year I also got my license suspended for underage drinking and had to move back with my parents for a year. At my parents urging I started going to church activities every week, which is where i met my now ex-wife. I spent 2011 until about 2016 slowly knowing that I was going to come out eventually, but i was doing it all in secret. What I was doing was in pretty stark contrast to my religious upbringing and all the pressure being placed on me to start being a husband, and the huge expectation to have kids.
It culminated in me wearing makeup to my old Home Depot job for about a month, and even though everyone there was pretty ok with it, my parents saw me one day. And the entire situation crashed around me. My parents and my ex let it be known that I was going to stop this forever or I'd be cut off from the family, that I'd be homeless and alone if I continued. They said what I was doing was against God.
And I was so scared I went along with it. Everything fem was thrown away. I shaved my head. I had a kid, even though I had some serious doubts that I would be a good parent. The next 4 years of my life was pretending to be the cis straight man my family wanted me to be.
And it's not a stretch to say that I was dying. I slept 3 hours a day. I went through periods of binge eating and then starving myself. I had a terrible temper. I started working a driving job and every time I got behind the wheel I thought about driving off a cliff. I gave up control of my finances. I let other people decide everything for me. I didn't get pleasure from anything in life at that point, not food or entertainment or even sex. The light was gone from my eyes, hidden behind a big beard and a flannel shirt.
It wasn't until summer 2021 that I couldn't take it anymore. I broke down in front of my ex-wife in a restaurant parking lot while our kid was asleep in the car. It was a 2-day fight where I was called hateful things I've never heard before, by someone who claimed to love me. But eventually she relented. We agreed the relationship between us was functionally over, and I still had an obligation to our son. I started looking for therapy the next day.
All that brings me to now. That ask was sent by an asshole, who doesn't know anything about my life and isn't gonna change their mind based on anything I say. But I do hope there are people who find this and think a little more positively about queer existence. You could say I 'chose to be trans' and you might be right in a way. I was always trans, but I chose to transition. Because the other option was death. I decide my life, not transphobes or my shit family or a shit interpretation of God. Me. Gay people, trans people, all of us *choose* to live in a way that makes us happy. That's it.
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madneedshelp · 1 year
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Redemption - Josh Kiszka x FReader
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Summary: After an accident leaves you on the brink of death, the images of your life flash by while you’re in this limbo state. All the moments with the best friend you never got the courage to confess to consume you at the end. Now, all you can do is beg and plead for one last chance with him. Words: 3.3k
Warnings: Description of accident, language, mentions of death, alcohol use
Note: Ok so I know this fic is just super out of pocket, the idea came to me at like 2 am during finals week when my brain was fried, but I wrote it anyway. Also, I tried to not insinuate any religious afterlife specifications just because obviously not everyone has the same beliefs, so I promise I don’t want to offend anyone. I hope you all enjoy my weird fic!
There was no way to describe the way you were feeling except as saying you felt nothing. It was almost as if you were nothing. You were in an abyss of nothingness, but in a warm and bright way. It was comforting, not terrifying.
Still, you were vaguely conscious of the fact that this was…odd. Time didn’t seem to affect you, so you weren’t sure how long it took you to remember what happened to you.
There was an accident. It had poured so heavily the day before, but you and your two friends were on a hiking trip and determined to do a trail anyway. There was a small break in the rain and both you and Josh decided you should seize your opportunity. Jake had tried to be the voice of reason, but the two of you pulled him along anyway.
You were about halfway done when it was like the skies opened up and rain swamped you all. There weren't any good options for shelter, so you pushed ahead as fast as you could. By the time you made it to the final stretch, the downpour was thick enough that you couldn’t really see and mud kept trying to take hold of your shoes, but all you had to do was make it uphill and you’d be at the parking lot.
Jake and Josh were ahead of you, just far enough to be out of reach when you slipped. The path was narrow and slick. There weren’t any trees of substantial size along the edges. The combination of all those things ended with you sliding right off the edge of the cliffside.
The last vague memory you had is the sounds of screaming and the flash of fear as you plummeted toward a boulder below.
Despite the warm place you seemed to be in, cold panic started to seep into your veins. Were you dead? You must’ve hit your head on the way down, and now you were…no, no, no, you couldn’t be. You were a year away from finishing your undergrad, you had future trips planned with friends, and you hadn’t even told your best friend that you loved him yet.
Josh. What about Josh? You couldn’t die before you got to tell him how you felt. You had so many opportunities, but you never took any of them because you didn’t want to lose him if he didn’t feel the same. Hundreds of chances, but you always banked on there being a next time. Now you might've run out.
—--8 Years Ago—--
“Josh, I swear if you don’t put that back where it belongs, I will shave your eyebrows while you sleep!” You shouted, taking a good ten steps back from the curly-haired boy.
You should’ve known better than to agree to go to the creek with Josh. He and Jake had been begging you to come down here with you for weeks, but the weather hadn’t been very warm so far. Now that it was summer break, the three of you had ventured out here.
Not that you minded the extra time with Josh. Yeah, he was your best friend, but something was different lately. Though you had never talked about the feelings with anyone before, you knew it was a crush. You really liked this boy, even if he was kind of annoying and a bit of a weirdo.
He looked between you and the newt in his hands with false innocence. “What’s wrong? It’s not gonna hurt you. Don’t you like lizards?”
You held out an arm to signal for him to stay back. “I don’t love them, and also that’s not a lizard. Now please, just put him down.”
“It’s not? Here, why don’t you take a closer look just to check.” A mischievous grin spread across his face as he lunged toward you with the small creature.
You let out a small shriek and took off down the creek. He followed after you instantly while laughing maniacally.
At some point, he either dropped or let the newt go, but it turned into him just chasing you. With the threat of the best gone, your competitive streak started to come alive and you would be damned if you let him beat you. Your legs were just a bit longer than his and you were fast. However, Josh was a ball of energy and he was rapidly gaining on you in the rocky terrain.
Just as his hand closed around your arm you tripped on a slippery rock and the both of you went down with a splash. The two of you kept laughing for a minute until if faded as a silent realization fell upon both of you.
Josh had fallen to where he was on his hands and knees hovering over where you lie on your back. His face was only inches from yours.
Neither of you were sure why the other didn’t move. Whether it was due to actual feelings or simply the curiosity of 13 year old kids starting to wonder about what it would be like to kiss someone, you couldn’t tell. You were stuck with your eyes locked on each other.
Unfortunately, you never got to find out what would’ve happened. You both hesitated a moment too long and Jake’s shouting grabbed your attention. He must’ve returned from his trip back to grab some water.
“Josh! Y/N! Dad said lunch is ready!”
“Coming!” Josh shouted back, scrambling up from his position.
He offered you a hand, which you took shyly, and started to brush yourself off. Neither of you said a word as you made your way back to the grassy lawn where you left your stuff. Jake was already gone by the time you two climbed up the bank.
“Hey, uh, do you want my shirt?” Josh held up the article of clothing.
He was smart enough to have shed it before you played in the creek. Still, his question took you aback.
“What?” You felt your face warm slightly.
He seemed to get a bit more embarrassed as he explained. “Well your shirt got soaked when we fell, so I just wondered if you wanted to borrow it.”
“Oh, um, yeah thanks.” You grabbed the shirt from him with a small smile.
As soon as it was in your hand, it hit you that you’d have to take off your shirt to change. And you were pretty far from the house. And there were very few trees along the creek.
Even at 13 Josh was a good guy. His manners kicked in when it mattered. Without you asking, he swiveled to face the field away from you so you could change and made a playful remark about keeping watch, even though it was highly unlikely that anyone would turn up.
You quickly swapped out your wet t-shirt for his dry one and poked him on the shoulder. “I’m done now.”
“Great, let’s go.” He smiled at you.
He was still quiet on the walk back. Normally, you could handle a comfortable silence with Josh, but this afternoon things were different. The two of you nearly kissed in the creek, you were wearing his shirt, and now you were noticing that he smelt oddly good for a teenage boy.
You would never tell anyone how much you regretted not kissing Josh. He would’ve been your first kiss. You ended up wasting it on some boy at a school dance the following school year, and you didn’t even really like him. But how could you have kissed Josh back at the creek when you didn’t think he wanted the same thing?
—--3 Years Ago—--
“Babe, you look absolutely stunning!” Jake’s girlfriend beamed at you after she finished doing your hair.
You flushed and blew a playful kiss at her. “Stop it, you look gorgeous! I can’t wait to see the look on Jake’s face!”
You and her had become good friends in the time she’d been dating Jake. She’d offered to do your hair for prom if you would do her makeup, and the two of you even went dress shopping together. It was kind of refreshing considering most of the time you hung out with the twins.
“I’m more excited to see Josh’s face. Seriously, there’s no way he’s just gonna sit there all night and keep calling you his best friend. He’s got it bad for you and this is gonna break him.” She smirked at you.
You rolled your eyes at her. “Not true.” It was, though. She had figured out your crush on him a while ago, but you would never admit it.
You and Josh were going to prom together, yes, but just as friends. You broke up with your boyfriend a few weeks ago, and Josh and his girlfriend had ended things around the same time too. That left both of you single and in need of prom dates. It felt only natural to go with your best friend, especially when you’d planned on going with Jake and his girlfriend as a group anyways.
“You know I don’t believe you, but I’d rather go see the proof now, so let’s go.” She winked and pulled you out of her room and downstairs.
As expected, Jake found his girlfriend to be extremely pretty and told her so at least four times. If you hadn’t been paying attention to their goofball romance, you might’ve noticed that Josh was looking at you like you were a shooting star, bright and rare, like if he blinked he would miss you entirely.
Once you stepped over to him, he blinked and cleared his throat nervously. “You look really nice.”
“Thank you, you do too.” You smile at him, trying to keep your voice even. He really did look good. He’d done his best to tame his wild hair and he even got a vest for his suit that matched your dress.
He offered you his arm and the two of you followed behind Jake and his girlfriend to the front yard to take pictures. Everyone’s parents were present, and millions of pictures of everyone and every combination of each were taken. For the next few years you kept a picture of you and Josh from prom in your room, along with your other favorites.
After pictures and dinner, the four of you finally made it to prom and everyone scattered periodically to mingle. Jake and Josh went to talk to some of their other friends, and you and Jake’s girlfriend did the same. Eventually, you all snuck out the back and drank a bit from the flasks you snuck in and returned to repeat the cycle of talking and dancing.
Of course it wouldn’t have been prom without the cheesy slow song thrown randomly in the mix. The four of you happened to have already been on the dance floor dancing to the upbeat song previously played, so Jake and his girlfriend almost immediately switched into slow-dance-mode. That left you and Josh. You were just thinking it would be the perfect time for a drink break when Josh held out his hand.
“Dance with me?” He asked with a grin.
You returned it and nodded. “Of course.”
As the steady ballad crooned from the speakers, you and Josh drifted together. His hand on your waist, your arms around his neck, you looked like every other couple on the dancefloor.
“Crazy to think we’re already here and graduating in like a month.” He chuckled.
“Oh, don’t go getting all sappy on me now, Joshy.”
“Can’t help it, I guess this music is just getting to me. Can I be honest with you?”
You narrowed your eyes at him and nodded. “Yeah?”
He chuckled under his breath for a moment before he sobered up a little. “Relax, it’s nothing bad. I’m just glad that I’m here with you.”
You felt the seriousness creep back into you then. “Me too. There’s no one I’d rather be here with.”
The thoughts you had been trying to push away for the past few months were threatening to surface. Graduation in May. Summer break in June and July. Then you’d leave for college in August. After that you’d be states away from your best friends and family.
Just tell him. Say it now while you have the courage. The small voice inside you was screaming, but there was enough of you too terrified to act. You couldn’t ruin prom and the whole summer together if things went south.
Instead, you settled for laying your head on his shoulder and mumbling “I’m going to miss you.”
—--Your 21st Birthday—--
Nashville was a fun place to celebrate your 21st birthday. Since you didn’t get to see your friends often, the three of you splurged on the event and decided to take a trip. While you had all been drinking way before it was legal, being able to go bar hopping was still exciting.
Needless to say, you were all drunk and having a blast. You’d spent the earlier part of the day sightseeing and exploring the city, but tonight was the real reason for the trip.
At the last minute, you invited your college roommate out of nerves. You had gotten lucky to have been matched with Katie, she was now a close friend of yours. That’s why you asked her to come. You hadn’t seen Josh since your last break from school and you were more than a little nervous. You kept in touch over the phone, but in person was different. You were still in love with him, despite the fact that you’d tried to fall for other people, so you brought Katie in case you freaked.
Unfortunately, you forgot about Katie’s weakness for long-haired men and Jake’s tendency to be a bit of a hoe (which you meant completely lovingly). The moment Jake started tipsy-flirting with her, her buzzed self folded. They had been talking for a good part of the night.
However, things between you and Josh were good. You two were cool. You were friendly for the whole day, and now that you were on the drinking portion of the trip, your crush was scaring you less and less. It was definitely the liquid courage in your veins.
It was the dancing at a club that took you all out. The alcohol finally developed its depressant effect and tiredness was beginning to seep over all of you. Thankfully, the Air BnB you rented wasn’t far and you all were able to walk back home safely.
Katie and Jake were dangerously close to making out on the couch once you’d returned, so you and Josh escaped to the balcony. The night air was chilly and the two of you snuggled close to keep warm.
“This is nice.” You murmured, a dreamy smile on your face.
“What is?” Josh mumbled.
“You being here. With me.”
“Hmm I like being with you too, baby.” He hummed happily.
You snuggled into his side. “I love you, Joshy. I wish you were with me all the time.”
He wrapped his arm tighter around you. “I love you too. You’re my best friend, just don’t tell Jake.”
Even in your inebriated state, his words hit you. Best friend. Nothing more. You suddenly felt less buzzed and giggly. You were starting to remember that you were just a girl who had loved her best friend since she was 13 and he didn’t see you as anything else.
Except that he did. You didn’t know it, but he loved you so much. He wanted to tell you that too, but you looked so sad when he said it back that he got too scared to say more.
The trip ended two days later and you all went your separate ways, no closer to the closure that you so desperately wanted from him.
—--Now—--
You wanted to kick yourself as your life flashed past you. So many chances with Josh. Now he would never know that you loved him and you would never know if he loved you.
This couldn’t be it. It couldn’t end like this.
Please.
Anything.
I’ll do anything for one more shot.
I’ll be brave this time.
I’ll make it count.
Please.
“Y/N?”
It was fuzzy, like you were underwater, but you definitely could hear it.
“Can you hear me?”
You couldn’t quite form the words, but you could hear more clearly now. There was a woman speaking.
“Can you hear us?” Another woman spoke.
This time you formed a hum that you hoped was audible enough to be taken as a ‘yes’.
“Do you think you can open your eyes for me?” The woman asked.
Everything was so heavy, but you tried so so hard. You felt someone brush your arm lightly, and realized you could feel it. You could hear and feel and holy shit that meant you weren’t dead. That was the little push you needed to open your eyes.
You were in what was definitely a hospital room and two women in scrubs were watching you carefully.
“Glad to have you with us, Y/N.” The older one smiled. “I’m Dr. Jones and we heard you stirring a couple minutes ago. You’ve had a lot of people pretty worried.”
“Where…” Your voice was thick and raspy, but after a moment it came back enough. “Where are they?”
The nurse answered as she was checking your vitals. “One of the two boys that brought you in went to the cafeteria a few minutes ago. They said your family was on their way. You’ve been out for almost two days.”
That thought made you nauseous, but then your mind went back to her first words. “Josh?”
The nurse smiled at you. “Yes, I believe that’s him.”
“Y/N?”
You looked over at the doorway to be met with the sight of Josh. He looked exhausted. His eyes were rimmed in dark circles and he just looked…sad. But he was your Josh and it was the best sight you’d ever seen for that reason.
“Looks like you’re stable and doing well, so we’ll give you two a moment. Just take it easy.” Dr. Jones said before stepping out of the room with your nurse.
Josh was at your side in an instant, tears in his eyes. “Oh God, I’m so sorry. We should never have went out there. They didn’t know if you were going to make it. We were so scared. I was so scared. I’m so fucking sorry.”
You placed your hand gently on his arm and shook your head. “It’s not your fault. I made the choice to go. It was just an accident.”
“An accident on the trip I planned. On the hike I suggested. Baby, I’m so sorry.” The tears were falling down his face now.
You slowly lifted a hand to his face. “You didn’t do this, Josh. You actually saved me.”
“No I didn’t. Jake’s the one that carried you in. I…I was too hysterical, I couldn’t calm down.”
“No, not that. I kept seeing you. I had to get back to you. I think that’s what brought me back.” You smiled.
“What?” He wiped at his eyes.
“I couldn’t go, Josh. Not without telling you that I love you. I’ve been in love with you for so many years, and I know this isn’t a great time to say it, but I’m too scared to wait for something else to happen.”
“You mean that?” He croaked.
“I mean it. I love you.”
A fresh wave of tears slid down his cheeks. “God, I should’ve told you sooner. I love you too. I love you so much, and I never want to lose you. I need you.”
This time you took your chance. You pressed a light kiss to his lips and he leaned into it. Sure, you wished the circumstances were different and you could really kiss him, but you would absolutely take this moment over the alternative.
You would spend the rest of your life making the most of your second chance.
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skarlettskwrl · 1 month
Text
Embedding images on AO3: A Guide V2
Hi,
So, I thought I would go back and make an updated version of the A03 embedding image guide I made back in September of 2022.
This choice was mainly due to one of the options being viable.
Discord.
Due to the rise in malware distribution, Discord has set expirations on Discord links. This only applies to links that are used outside of Discord.
This short video explains this well
youtube
So, If we wanted to use the option, we would need to update the link every 24 hrs in your work.
Not great.
I know I also feel the salt.
Well, with that out the way, let's dive in.
A03 doesn’t actually allow for image hosting itself, so that’s why third-party hosting is needed.
In this guide, we will use these as possible choices to host our images
Google Drive
Tumblr
Imgur
https://postimages.org/
Other contenders:
IMGBB https://imgbb.com/
imgbox https://imgbox.com/
IMGBAM https://www.imagebam.com/
Image venue https://www.imagevenue.com/
Paste board https://pasteboard.co/
(Most if not all if these options listed require signup)
But really there are many options to choose from. If you have any recommendations, comment, and I’ll add them in.
Before we upload, you may need to compress your image(s) to shave them down to size, as some of these options upload size caps.
I recommend https://compressjpeg.com/ for this task. Or you may choose whatever your preference is.
Hosting options:
Option 1: Google Drive
In Google Drive, create a new folder with the image(s) or subfolders for further organization.
Right-click and select New Folder, and name this folder whatever you want.
Now upload your image(s)
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Right-click on your image and hit share.
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Hit Copy link
The link you have should look something like this
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Nt17i9jx8LYffyQQew6D2x4HYxXFM0_B/view?usp=sharing
But as is it won't work! We need to modify it first!
Remove the
/view?usp=sharing
at the end of the link to work with AO3
Now, you have a working link from Google Drive that is ready to use.
Your modified link should look like…
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Nt17i9jx8LYffyQQew6D2x4HYxXFM0_B
This Google Drive portion was from this guide here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28132845
Option 2 Tumblr:
Tumblr is not always the best platform to use, as blogs can get deleted or URLs can change. But I’ll include it here anyway.
On mobile
Long tap the image you wish to use in a post.
You will be presented with this menu.
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Tap share photo.
Then, you will be presented with another menu.
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On the desktop, it will basically be the same.
Right-click on the image and hit copy image address.
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Now, you have a working link from Tumblr that is ready to use.
Option 3: Imgur
First sign up for an account. I would recommend this because last year, Imgur began deleting images not tied to a user account. This means that if you upload an image without an account, the image link may eventually expire and the image will be deleted.
Create a new post
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Upload your desired photo(s).
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Do not hit the Grab Link button
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It will not work with AO3
Instead, right, click on the image and hit copy image link or address, depending on your browser.
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Now your Imgur Link is ready to use.
Option 4: Using an image hosting service like postimages.org
You can create an account for free with this one. This is pretty straightforward, so I’ll gloss it over.
Once logged in you will be presented with this page.
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Upload your image, and you will be taken to this page.
Copy Direct link
Now, you have a working link from postimages ready to use.
Step 2: Inserting and fitting the image
Head over to Ao3.
Go to the new or existing chapter in which you wish to embed image(s).
HTML OPTION:
Make sure in the HTML editor view.
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This is located next to the rich text button in the Worktext section, as shown.
Now, find the place in the text where the image should go...
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Now, preview your work to confirm the link is correct.
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As you can see the image worked but in my case the image was waaaayyy too big.
So, we can add the width and height attributes to scale the image to a more comfortable size.
First, we need to know the exact dimensions of the image.
This can be done by looking at the size in an image app or can be done with an online tool.
Record these values
In this example, the image is 1080x2400
Now divide each by the same factor; this is important to avoid compressing or stretching the image.
In this example, We quartered/ divided them by 4.
Width = 1080/4 = 270px Hieght = 2400/4 = 600px
Record these values
And update the img tag
<p> <img src="" alt="" width="" height=""/> </p>
src is the path to the URL.
alt is the alternative text for the image. This is used for accessibility as well as be a modern web standard.
width is the image width in pixels
height is the image height in pixels
You insert your values in between the double quotes.
ALWAYS TO REMEMBER:
to close your quote _
to close your image tag
to close and include your units
Here it is much better.
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RICH TEXT OPTION:
Make sure in the Rich Text editor view.
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Set the cursor where you want the image. Click the image icon.
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Set the values in this form.
Use the URL we generated in one of the previous 4 options.
Set the Image description
The width and height may be input automatically; if you are unsure, consult the HTML OPTION to find the dimensions and how to rescale an image.
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Here’s how it looks after posting
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Well, that concludes my simple guide to AO3 image embedding. Thanks for reading to the end.
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not-goldy · 6 months
Note
Are you okay Goldy? In case anyone hasn't asked.
I'm Jimin biased too and I have no friends who are into BTS, so they don't know how I feel. I also don't have Jikookers I talk to. I am just alone in my thoughts, crying for Jimin for the past 2 days. Actually since it was decided he would serve and not be exempt, but seeing him with his shaved head, fighting back tears, is keeping me awake at night. The only thing giving me comfort is seeing that the sleeping arrangements for buddy enlisted men is they get a double bed that is actually together, not separated that they sleep on together and they can cuddle without judgement. You can see other soldiers cuddling in pics. Not saying Jikook will, but other buddies have and do it. I just hate he won't have a soft warm bed for his muscle aches and pain, but just falling sleep next to a familiar body, after a horrendous day, esp Jungkook the person he's closest too, probably helps.
I also hate how tkk, jk solos and Jimin antis are making this seem like JK was forced to do this & spreading lies that he had no other options, his tats prevented from what he wanted, he will leave after 5 weeks, to cope with their pain over Jk chooses this with Jimin, instead of realizing Jk is probably fucking petrified at the thought of doing this. Scared and didn't want to be alone and needs Jimin just as much as Jimin needs him. Instead of being happy Jk has someone, they reduce him down to be an emotionless robot who doesn't need protecting, while other says he is just there to protect Jimin. When they watched JK for months alone, crying, drinking and having a hard time sleeping on live and the only thing that brightened his mood was watching Jimin videos and being motivated by him. Maybe he did this cause he wants to be protected by Jimin. Maybe its him who needs that comfort from the person he cares about the most. maybe Jimin did this for him too. Its a two way street.
No. I'm not okay. This is not okay. None of this is okay.
I don't want to talk about Jimin and MS, JM and his shaved hair, he's gone. There's nothing we can do about it. He's gone. Right or wrong he's gone.
I feel a lot of hate and anger in my heart for that oppressive system it's almost botherline racist and I need to be careful not to pour out such negativity.
I'm trying to deal with this the best way I can and managing my triggers is part of it so when I'm ready to talk about it I will
For now let's avoid the triggers I'm on thin ice here
You can share sure, I will bookmark them and read them later
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gepperl · 7 months
Text
TRANS MALE PASSING PROTIPS
Targeted specifically at trans men who have not begun medical transition, but for anyone. Of course, this is just what works for me and everyone is different.
Shorts that fall mid thigh and are baggy can work really well to make a more masculine figure. This is a trendy style with cis men, and if they are looser on your thighs you can look more rectangular. Basketball shorts are always fine, but for bigger people can end up sticking to your thighs and making you look like a masc lesbian. Looking like a masc lesbian is so so common guys this is what we are trying to avoid. See here for reference
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2. WALK WITH YOUR SHOULDERS. Walk like your shoulders are the widest part of your body. Move them kinda forward and backward. Watch a video of a man walking next to a woman for context on what I mean. Women walk with their hips, and it makes all the difference for you in someone's head. Practice in the mirror before doing it so you don't look like a fool.
3. Hair!!!! I know you guys don't want to let go of the 2020 fluffy boi haircut and that is ok. If you don't want a skin fade short haircut, there are other options. Also, if you belong to a subculture, like punk/emo/whatever else there is, look at male styles as it can be very different than what is normally accepted ( for example, men have long hair in metal subculture, you can style it like them). In general, hair is very meticulous, as for some people too short is masc lesbian and too long is woman.
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This kind of hair can do wonders. For men of color/curly hair people, if you are not out locs are a very good option as they are typically read as masculine but are gender neutral. Afros, braids, even skin fades with a lot of hair at the top can read feminine. Another style option could be short cornrows that end at the neck, twists, or a fade with less hair at the top like this.
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I am not black, so I cannot speak for how this would be read in a black community, but this is how, from my experience, I would view the hairstyles. Sorry if this is not appropriate. Also, I am not here to tell you not to dye your hair. It can work if you style it with masculine clothes and are dressed in a specific style like emo or scene or something. Do what you will with that.
4. If there is ANY peach fuzz on your face, make the most of it. I know I have high testosterone levels naturally, so I grow facial hair a little, but if there is enough to dye it, dye it. If there is like barely any, if its not visible in the mirror if you're really looking (not INSPECTING), it's probably not worth it, and that is fine. use your judgement, and if it is not enough, just shave it. It's better to look clean shaven than desperate for face hair. Eyebrows, mustache hair, sideburns can all be darkened with eyeshadow, brow brushes, and just for men beard dye.
5. LAYERS. I know you guys have seen this one before. Flannels, button ups over black t-shirts, zip up hoodies. It might get a little hot, but it covers your sweat stains anyways. I promise guys it helps so much with shoulders, hips, boobs, it makes you look more masculine. Don't get that ugly ass red and black checkered one though. Think if you would see a masc lesbian wearing it and use your best judgement. I heart layers.
6. Pants. Woah. Pants. I HATE pants I know you fat trans men get me. Old navy women's jeans...and you guys won't like this one...are actually pretty good. SPECIFICALLY the sky high wide leg ones. Get those a size up and cuff them, wear them low on your waist, perfect. Other than that, jeans are shit. I don't really waste my time with men's pants anymore because of my hips but cargos are great, baggy sweats with the band at the bottom are great, PJ pants good, dress pants are a struggle but I've heard dickies work well for people with a smaller body. Not sure though. My tactic is I go to a thrift store for hours and try on all their pants, then find similar ones online or take pictures of the brand for the ones I like and find more.
7. Accessories and jewelry. Iffy. Anything you could describe as dainty, if it's not a family thing or important to you, probably not. Friendship bracelets are good, pendants are good, earrings depends on where you are and what you are wearing. Studs in men are common where I am, so I wear them. Observe the cis men at your disposal. Accessories, bags don't really matter unless they're like the strawberry hot topic mini bags. Don't get those at all those are fugly. Mini bags are not great in general, just better to get something else. Watches are heavily loved here they look very male and also you have the time always even a cheap watch is fine just not a woman's watch. It has to be a men's watch. You can tell when it is a woman's watch don't get those. Nail polish is fine no one cares, it's more popular now with boys. Especially if you're a little girly pop already. Of course that also depends on your environment.
8. Stance. Sitting with your ankle on your knee is comfortable and way more masculine than crossing your legs. Confidence. Fake it until you make it because cis men are so arrogant guys. This is what I mean btw
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9. Don't be afraid of being feminine. Don't give up being yourself in order to be masculine. Your happiness matters the most. Love you bye, I'll update this if I think of anything else.
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