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saltygilmores · 1 year

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Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls, Season 2, Episode 4 ("The Road Trip To Harvard") Aka JessMas Eve This episode makes my list of favorite episodes. On that list of episodes, only two of them don't include Jess (the other being Rory & Paris' super gay spring break trip). So I guess you could say I enjoy the episodes where the characters manage to escape The Hollow for a bit and visit The Real World™. I already reviewed Jess' debut in the next episode ahead of schedule (which you can read here), so next time you see me post it will be Season 2, Episode 6. You can read the rest of my reviews here. I'm going to enjoy these last gasps of breath before Jess shows up and the agonies begin. Until then, let's pack our shit, print out our Mapquest directions, drag out the giant binder of compact discs, and get on with the road trip. Let me just say I admire Lorelai's ability to self reflect and admit to herself that she wasn't ready to get married and that Max wasn't the right person for her.

Rory: What did that sign say? Don't? Or Death? We're doomed. Lorelai: Wrong. We're being guided by fate.

Same things I'm saying as I await Jess Mariano's arrival.

I love Rory's disdain for all the late 90's pop music that I cherish so dearly.

Is that the name of the local asulym in The Hollow?

Debatable. Lorelai: I hope you didn't get too far on that cake. I know the kind of work you were gonna put into that cake and I'd just kill myself if you went crazy for nothing.

"Oh sure, don't worry about it Lorelai. It's not like I poured blood, sweat and tears, dozens of man-hours, and expensive ingredients into this god damn monstrosity just for you. I'm not going put you in a chokehold the next time I see you or anything. I'm Sookie! I'm too cute and quirky for that!"

"Here's what I think about your cold feet, Lorelai. " *grabs knife*

Awww Sookie, you're too kind. Thank you. I... don't understand Lorelai putting down Bed and Breakfasts. Doesn't she literally manage one? I suppose there is some minute difference between a charming, small town, New England "inn" run by quirky characters, and a charming, small town, New England "Bed and breakfast" run by quirky characters? Lorelai at the Cheshire Cat B&B: We can't stay here. Rory: Where are we going to sleep then? Dying of exposure in a car is my worst nightmare. Rory when she saw Jess dying of exposure in a car:

Lorelai: We found the only room that would have made Liberace step back and say "Wow, step back, no one's that gay!" Early 2000's tv writing, everyone! Lorelai: Are you hungry enough to risk having to answer 100 questions about Chilton, your life in a small town, and your hunky hunky boyfriend? No matter how far from home she strays, Lorelai's's thoughts are never far from Dean. Handsome, tall, beautiful, hunky hunky, 16 year old bag-boy Dean Forrester.

Rory: What do we do now? Lorelai: Go to sleep? Rory: It's only 8:30. How about we talk?

"Please say Dean, please say Dean, please say Dean..."

"...Damn it."

This screen shot has so many potential uses for future reviews! I will be stealing it. Thanks Lorelai! #Yoink Lorelai calls Sookie again, who is just chilling at Luke's instead of at the Inn for once, honestly kind of an unusual sight that threw me off. Earlier in the episode, on her first call to Sookie, Lorelai asked her to have Miss Patty spread the gossip that the engagement was kaput, but we learn that news has not yet reached Luke, who is in the middle of trying to throw Kirk out of the diner for ordering 8 refills of his coffee and occupying a table for too long. Kirk: I've been trying to figure out the tip, I'm not good at math. What's 6% of $4.43? 8 cups of coffee for under $5? 55 cents a cup? Good deal. See that Gilly Girls? Someone who pays Luke for their food and even leaves a tip! Granted, he's only about to leave 26 cents but at least it's something. Learn from this man. I know Lorelai eventually begins to pay Luke back with Nature's Credit Card (booty) but that's still a few years off. Sookie breaks the news to Luke, and the Grinch's heart grew 4 sizes that day. In light of the bad news, he decides he won't charge Kirk for his (now 9) cups of coffee, forgoing his 25 cent tip, and also gives free coffee to everyone else in the diner, plunging himself even deeper into debt. Anyone else ever think about poor Jess waiting tables, depending on tips but knowing that R&L never tipped him? And Rory would never even tip him with Nature's Credit Card. Shame, that.

I recognize the woman on the left from an episode of The Golden Girls and the guy in the middle from an episode of Seinfeld (Fun bit of trivia: Lauren Graham and Scott Patterson both made appearances on Seinfeld!)

Sorta kinda. And now for easily the best thing ever spotted in the background of a tv show.

Wanted: SAT Instructors? No, that's not it. Conference on Voting Modernization. Hmm, not quite...just move up a skosh there... Affordable Spanish tutoring? No..

Rory, you desperately need a job and I notice you're not jumping to sign up for this easy gig. I think this would look impressive and really stand out on your college application and you may learn a thing or two. Dean and Jess would be very appreciative. Sadly, even with my good vision I can't make out what the rest of the tiny writing says except "Gay and straight" and that the last line is some pervy perv's email address.

"Hey baby, you signing up for the Porn Watching job too?"

Sounds like a good place for getting paid to watch porn. I think Jess would have loved college, and in my headcanon he definitely gets his GED and goes to college in his 20's. The WB network basically made a show about it. It's called The Bedford Diaries. Or as I affectionately call it "Jess Goes To College". The GillyGirls commit some light breaking and entering and walk into an open dorm room.

I just wrote a song, want to hear it? Here goes: Vintage computers, oh so cute, early 2000's I love youuuu!

I know this was 2001, but Lorelai thinks it costs $100 to take a class at Harvard.

How do you know you're really at Harvard? Everyone wears sweatshirts that say "Harvard" on them. Rory tries to sneak into the class unnoticed but drops her coffee which causes every single person in the room to turn around and angrily glare at her and she gets reprimanded by the professor for not sitting in a seat. My heart breaks for her pathetic self. But if it's any comfort to Rory, in The Real World ™ I can promise you nobody in that class would give a shit about you or your coffee.

♫ I'm at a payphone, tryin to call Luke, I never pay him for his food ♫

The two women next to Rory are rolling their eyes so far back in their heads they're going to make a full rotation and come back out the other side.

Oh hey I know that guy in the red shirt! A time traveler from the distant year 2006. He didn't stick the landing, had to re-live 9/11 a month earlier and now he's being forced to listen to Rory Gilmore's thoughts on philosophy. That was a Heroes joke. That's the guy who played Hiro on the tv show Heroes. He could travel through time.

My man in plaid here has fallen into a coma.

Out of Context Gilly Girls Lorelai comes home and forces her mother to watch slides of their trip. Emily to Lorelai: Why would you go out of town right before your wedding? Wouldn't your fiance mind?

Heh heh, woopsie daisy! Emily thinks Lorelai eloped and flies into a rage but Lorelai tells her what happened. Emily's only response is that she's returning Lorelai's wedding gift. Lorelai once again swallows and represses her ongoing trauma and instead grills her mother on what the gift was, but she won't say. Doesn't Lorelai recieve an ice cream making machine in the mail with no return address a short time later, or was that just a fever dream? Ah, I suppose we shall soon find out. And now for the Relevant Stuff That Happens In The Last Three Minutes: Lorelai & Luke have a very sweet conversation where she decides to keep the chuppah and turn it into a positive instead of a painful reminder. Lorelai asks Luke if he will give her guidance on owning a business and he accepts. She wants to begin the process of opening an Inn with Sookie. Lorelai opens her flip phone and thank god she's just calling Sookie again and not Christopher. And Lane escaped from Korea. Good for her.

Tomatos Sign: Spotted.

#gilmore girls #rory gilmore #lorelai gilmore #luke danes #Gilmore Girls Season 2 #The Road Trip to Harvard #Denise Rewatches Gilmore Girls

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bluuespring · 2 years

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I was tagged by lovelies @ughbehavior & @ipegchangbin ♡!! thank you both

rules: share ten different favorite characters from ten different pieces of media in no particular order, then send this to/tag 10 people.

ajfpasf this took me forever to decide :’) so there are actually 12 and not 10 I’m so sorry.

1. jane eyre / this novel got me into reading, writing and studying literature so I’m eternally grateful for it. jane is a badass. she will not be caged. also rochester is an asshole and doesn’t deserve her.

2. bucky barnes (marvel) / I’m not into marvel that much anymore, but bucky will always have a special place in my heart, he is such a fascinating character and I will eternally love him and devote my soul to him. even my dad knows him too well (he took me to see civil war and i cried a lot) protect him at all costs. also fuck me up long-haired red shirt civil war bucky

3. jesse pinkman (breaking bad) / have I ever cried more tears for a fictional character? i dont think so. I couldve put anyone from this show (hANK SCHRADER???? MIKE?????? GUS???!?!! SKYLER???!?!?!!!!!!) but jesse... yeah. he’s my broken little dork and I still weep for him regularly.

4. joel miller (the last of us) / that goes without saying....w tf..... joel miller has had a chokehold on me since 2015 and he will never leave me. the tears I wept. the hURT I have felt. he is so special to me and his voice, his actions, his very being has influenced me to the core. I could write an entire thesis on this man.

5. elizabeth bennett / has a more badass mf ever existed in media? no. I think not. lizzie is the mvp. her and darcy are the originals. i dont care what you say.

6. jack from marrowbone / those who haven’t seen this movie just watch it... you’ll never be the same. what the fuck. I’m still not over it. wtf.

7. violet baudelaire / my role model as a child. I wanted to be 14 so bad for so long because I wanted to be violet. she’s a star. now she’s like my child. forever in my heart.

8. fred and george weasley / they come as a pair ok fight me.... but those two. oof. their writer is a piece of shit that deserves the worst but gred and forge deserve the best. I will never forgive and I will never forget™️. they were also the objects of my first official fanfic which gave me confidence in writing so yeah. they’re my soulmates. a part of me will always live above weasley’s wizard wheezes. ♡

9. rengoku (demon slayer) / I know this must be a ~mainstream~ choice or whatever but I don’t care. the imprint that he has left on me. him and tanjiro remind me of the importance of kindness and I have embraced it fully since.

10. kaz brekker (shadow and bone) / I really hesitated with inej but kaz. that boy. that character............ I will always vividly remember reading him for the first time. like oh. OH. oh. And it was too late

11. kang sae byeok (squid game) / I saw this girl and I knew... I knew we were going to have silent conversations. her portrayal. her vulnerability. her strength. she is it.

12. opie (sons of anarchy) / I havent even finished watching sons but .... fuck.... I saw ryan hurst who plays him at comic con bc my dad was a fan and he told a story about shampoo and I was never the same since.... he tugs at my heart strings and he’s everything the universe ought to look up to and i’m soft

13. and finally matilda / if there is an origin story to who I am. it’s this.

I don’t know who to tag so... anyone who wants to do it go ahead and tag me I’d love to see <333

Honorable Mentions (bc yes I have a long list)

- Dean Winchester from Supernatural (don’t ask me about it.... don’t...) - Eun-tak from Goblin (aposfjasfasf) - Hong Du-sik from Hometown Cha Cha Cha (husband material™️) - Celine & Jesse from the Before trilogy (those movies fucked me up..... but I love them.............) - L from Death Note (my little weirdo.... never change.... Ive never looked at a phone the same...) - Susan Pevensie from Narnia (another original) - Marta from Knives Out (i lOVE HER bless her heart) - Dallas from The Outsiders (its been more than a decade since.....) - Wanda from Marvel (she deserves better) - Temperance Brennan from Bones (inspiration) - Arthur Shelby from Peaky Blinders (a puppy. a child. i want to hold him.) - Frank Castle from The Punisher (hE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the excellence of morally grey!!!!!!) - Jaime Fraser from Outlander (i can’t deal with him....) - Cha-young from Vincenzo (a bADASS) - Glenn from the Walking Dead (no i will not talk about it) - Rip and Beth from Yellowstone (those two..... i’m.... *bites lip*) - The 12th Doctor from Doctor Who (don’t be lasagna will forever be imprinted into my brain) - House from House MD (a life inspiration. dont give a shit about people) - Connell and Marianne from Normal People (i wept) - Everyone™️ in the Haunting of Hill House (masterpiece)

#I'm probably forgetting really important ones but eh #the essential is there #if you ever want to talk in length about any of them #don't be shy<3 #thanks for tagging me!!!!! it was fun and painful at the same time #ily <3 #tag game #about me

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justagalwhowrites · 2 days

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i could listen to you answer all of these for hours and hours, but i’m gonna rein myself in and just ask: 🍌 (actually impossible because you’re soooo funny) 🍊 and 🫐

love you!!

AHHH HI BESTIE!!!

🍌 In your opinion, what’s the funniest joke/reference/pun you’ve made in a fic?: Probably Jess talking about getting infected by an errant Backstreet Boy in Lavender. As far as general humor? I love Goldie and Joel just ribbing on each other CONSTANTLY. Also, Joel teasing Doc and Doc teasing Joel the morning after they watch When Harry Met Sally together, when he tells her she sounded like a very tiny chainsaw in her sleep and she tells him he sure is mean for someone who's favorite movie is When Harry Met Sally. I also love the moment in Beskar Doll when Grogu hits Din in the face with a snowball. BUT you apparently think I'm funny (which warms my heart so much omg) what is your favorite if you have one?? I'm curious!

🍊 Who’s a character you don’t write for that often, but keep meaning to write for more? (They’re so interesting! But maybe you have trouble pinning them down, or keep getting distracted by another blorbo…): Probably Din. He's my first love, my dear Tin Can Man. I have so many ideas for him right now but Joel just has me in a chokehold. I also have that one Javi P fic I've been meaning to write FOREVER and I have some brain rot around Frankie and Whiskey atm. I just need to get better at splitting my time, I have too many ideas and not enough time!

🫐 What’s your favorite underrated thing in your fandom? (A ship that only you seem to write for, a character there’s almost no fics about, a trope that criminally hasn’t been written yet, etc.): Tommy being a brother/uncle is just my obsession. I'm so in love with him as a foil for Joel and their dynamic as brothers. I also adore him as a big brother/uncle to Sarah (he would have been SO young when she was born, he and Sarah have to have been tight) and his relationship with the FMC/Readers I put into stories. Obviously, with Doc, it was romantic. But for Bambi he's the teasing big brother who lives to give his little sister a hard time and in Halcyon, he's going to become more present as the smarts little brother. I just adore Tommy! Do you have one?? I'm still curious!!

Thank you for asking, Bestie!!! Love you!!!

#send asks #kit answers #ask game #fic writer ask games

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pro-fangirls-unsocial-life · 3 years

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Mistletoe Mishaps Fives x Reader

A/N: So this fic is kinda stupid and was based off of a tumblr post that I can no longer find, but I hope that you guys enjoy it anyways! I have been meaning to post a holiday themed fic but just have not had the motivation to write the one that I had in mind so I hope this one is alright for now! Enjoy! ( @captainrexisboo this is the fic I was talking about)

Length: ~1800 words

Warnings: none :) just shenanigans and fluff

“Are you sure?” You and Fives had stopped just outside of the 501st barracks. “I wouldn’t want to get in the way of you spending the holidays with your brothers.”

Fives softly smiled at you and took your hand. “Cyare, its going to be fine. I know you’re nervous, but we celebrate just like everyone else in the galaxy does.” He smiled and gave you a light kiss on your forehead. “Plus, the boys love you almost as much as I do. You’re family and we want you with us.”

You let out a sigh, clearing your mind and felt Fives give your hand a reassuring squeeze. “Alright,” you said with a smile. “Let’s get out of the cold and have some fun.”

Fives’ face lit up as he began pulling you the rest of the way toward the entrance to the barracks. “You’re going to love it Cyare! Echo makes the best hot coco, and this is the only time of year you will see Rex convince Cody to wear civies on the base!”

Giggling at Fives enthusiasm, you quickened your pace until you were at the door. Fives opened it and held it for you as the warm light from the party inside spilled onto the snowy ground. You stepped inside and felt the chill from the wind already begin to disappear.

“Y/N!” You heard your name said cheerfully from all over the room as everyone turned to smile at you.

“Glad you could make it,” Rex said as he walked up to you with a cup of hot coco in his hands. “Its so good to see you!”

You took off your coat and hung it up before turning to give Rex a hug. “Thanks for having me,” you said with a smile. “It’s nice to see all of you again.”

“Of course!” He looked around before leaning and whispering to you. “Plus, you being here makes Fives more likely to behave.”

You and Rex chuckled before turning to walk further into the party with him and Fives.

You look around the room to see members of the 501st and 212th laughing and having fun. All of them are wearing civilian clothes with some of them wearing holiday sweaters. Echo is standing in the back near the tree that the 501st had smuggled in talking to Tup and Dogma. You see Echo finish saying something before they all begin to laugh. Dogma was unfortunate enough to be taking a drink of his coco at the same time and accidentally spills it on himself before he starts coughing and Echo and Tup start laughing harder.

You hear a frustrated yell come from the Sabacc table before looking over to see a very pleased Kix gathering up the pot from the middle as Boil throws his cards down. Waxer pats Boils arm and Cody chuckles before holding his hand out to Wooley and Obi-Wan who both begrudgingly hand him a few credits.

You saw that Cody and Obi-Wan were wearing matching 212th colored sweaters before turning to Rex. “So, how angry was Cody when he found out you got them matching sweaters without him knowing?”

Rex followed your eyes over to Cody and laughed. “Oh, he was pretty pissed at me at first but warmed up to the idea when General Kenobi complimented him on it. I could feel his face heating up from across the room.”

You laughed and kept taking in the scene around you. There were lights and decorations covering the walls and tables set up all around the room with different kinds of fun things to do. There was a long table near the door to the kitchen that was covered in food that Jesse and Hardcase were mingling around. They looked like they were up to something, but you shook it off as them just having fun with their time off.

You took a deep breath in and could smell the hot coco that Echo had made wafting in from the kitchen door. You looked toward the kitchen, thinking about getting some when you saw that mistletoe had been hung from the top of the frame. You smiled and reminded yourself to drag Fives over there at some point before you felt his hand on your back.

“Do you want some hot chocolate cyar’ika? I’m on my way over there,” Fives asked with a tender smile.

You gave him a small kiss on the cheek. “Sure! That would be great!”

He began walking toward the kitchen before you motioned to it with your head. “So, are some of the others partners coming tonight? Is that why you guys put mistletoe up?”

Rex gave you a confused look. “Hmm?” He followed your eyes toward the kitchen and his face loosened up. “Oh, you mean the mistlefoe? I’d steer clear of that if I were you,” he said chuckling before taking a sip of his coco.

Your eyes went wide in surprise. “I’m sorry. The what?”

“You know? Whoever gets caught under it with another person has to fight them before someone yields? It’s a holiday tradition for us to hang one up somewhere and to—”

“AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!”

You looked over and saw Jesse barreling toward Fives in the kitchen doorway before tackling him to the ground and moving to put him into a headlock. Fives eyes widen before he reaches up and grabs onto Jesse, throwing him onto the ground. Everyone in the room starts to either laugh or cheer as they begin wrestling with each other. Fives quickly gets behind Jesse and puts him in a light chokehold. Jesse starts squirming and trying to get out of it while Fives laughs and keeps him restrained. “Do you yield yet vod?!”

Jesse growls and tries to break free. “No!” He reaches up to try and get a grip on Fives. “I’m not going to let you win that easily!”

They are both breathing heavily as they squirm around on the floor. Fives mischievously laughs. “Ha! Well, that’s too bad vod cause I’m not going to let you go until you yield!” He tightens his grip slightly as Jesse keeps struggling to break free.

About a minute goes by and you see Jesse start to get tired before he stops trying to break free. “Fine,” he huffs out. “I yield.”

Cheers erupt around you and you see a few of the men around you exchanging credits with each other. Fives lets go and pushes himself to his feet before helping Jesse up. “You sure as hell surprised me vod,” he said as he affectionately punched Jesse in the shoulder before giving him a handshake. “I’ll give you that.”

Jesse rolled his eyes and smiled before walking back over to a wheezing Hardcase and whacking him upside the head.

Fives turned to you and gave you a wink and a smile before going back to get the coco he was originally after.

You started laughing and brought your hand up to your face.

Rex chuckles. “What’s so funny?”

You keep laughing. “It’s just, that’s not exactly what I thought that was going to be for.”

“What did you think it was for if not that?”

You shake your head and lightly laugh. “Well, usually the mistletoe is hung up over a doorway and whoever is caught under it has to kiss the other person. That’s why I asked about your guys’ partners.”

Rex starts laughing into his mug while Fives walks up with your coco.

He pushes it into your hands and gives you a confused look. “What’s so funny?”

You take a sip of your coco and smile as you get an idea. “I’ll tell you later.”

*******************************************************************************************

The party had been going on for a couple of hours now, and everything was starting to wind down. Presents had been exchanged as well as a couple more punches in the doorway to the kitchen. You had talked with everybody at the party and your sides had hurt from laughing too much at least ten times that night.

With everything calming down, it began to get a bit quieter and the sounds of light conversations were drifting through the air.

You had just finished a conversation with Kix and were looking around for Fives. You saw him standing over at the window looking out at the snow while sipping on hot chocolate. He had his left hand in his pocket while the right was holding his cup.

You walked over to him and sild your hand down his arm until he took his hand out of his pocket and grabbed yours. You rested your head on his shoulder and looked out the window with him.

“What are you thinking about?”

Fives hummed and gave your hand a light squeeze. “Just how I wish things could be like this all the time.”

You looked up at him. “What do you mean?”

“I mean… All of us together having a good time. Not having anything to worry about. Plus, I don’t like being away from you as long as I am most of the time.”

You sighed and squeezed his hand before pulling him into a hug. “I don’t like being away from you either and I wish that things could be like this all the time too, but I know one thing that you’ll never have to worry about.”

He set his cup on the windowsill and wrapped his arms around you. “And what’s that?”

You smiled into his chest as he put his head on top of yours. “You’ll never have to worry about me not being here for you when you get back.” You lightly squeezed him. “You will never be rid of my love no matter how hard you try.”

You heard his voice reverberate throughout his chest as he chuckled.

The two of you stood there holding each other for a few minuets before you mischievously smiled. “Hey,” you said as you gently pushed him away. “I have something that might take your mind off of this stuff.”

He perked up and nodded, urging you to continue.

“Want to know what Rex was laughing at earlier?”

He watched you questioningly as you reached into your pocket and pulled out the mistletoe you had stolen from the kitchen doorway. You held it up above your head and gave him a smirk as he looked at you, completely lost.

You chuckled and rolled your eyes before you grabbed onto his sweater and pulled him into a kiss. He squealed in surprise before melting into the kiss. He brought his right hand up to hold your chin while his left hand snaked around your waist to pull you closer.

You pulled apart and looked up at his smiling face. “So, what do you think of my holiday tradition?”

He smirked and looked up like he was musing over it. “I think,” he said as he pulled you closer against him, “I want to do it again.”

He brought his hand up to cup your cheek as you smiled and leaned in to press another kiss to his lips. Smiling the whole time.

#fives x reader #arc trooper fives x reader #arc trooper fives #fives #my writing #mistletoe mishaps

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twomoonstwosuns · 4 years

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blackmail.

back to you [series masterlist]

previous part · next part

pairing: professor!poe dameron x reader

warning: swearing, a little angst, a little soft

word count: 3.1k

a/n: the last chapter got such an amazing response, thank you so much for that. i’m a little iffy about this chapter but i hope you still enjoy it! as always comments are very much appreciated (i've gotten some and they’ve been so lovely so thank you for that as well)

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The beginnings of spring meant that it was becoming increasingly harder to be inside of a classroom.

It was true for both students and professors, the shining sun coming out each day and bringing a new warmth to campus. The temptation to skip class was great, the buzz of excitement of there just being a little more than a month left of the semester making people not want to be stuck inside.

The weather getting warm during the day meant the temperatures when the sun went down were tolerable, just shy of being able to crack the windows open overnight. You had asked Poe, since the nights had been so nice, if he wanted to go on a late night stroll with Beebs through the park. It had been a long winter cooped up inside for all three of you, the idea of being able to spend time outdoors in the summer weather tempting you to make all kinds of summer plans with Poe.

Poe hurried through his office, grabbing everything he needed and shoving it in his bag. He was in a hurry to get home so he could eat dinner and get some more work done before he met you at the park. A small smile was on his face as he recalled the last time he was at the park with you.

There was a knock on the door and Poe looked up to see Armitage Hux, one of the last people he’d ever expect to willingly stop by his office. The men were acquaintances, professors in the same department, but Hux thought Poe was too young and too laid back when it came to teaching, so he never bothered to talk or work with him unless absolutely necessary. In comparison to Poe’s affable, fun, and likable persona, Hux was strict, straitlaced, and uptight.

“Do you have a minute to talk?” Hux asked, his tone suggesting he’d rather be anywhere else at that moment.

“Kind of on my way out, so make it quick.” Poe continued to grab things off of his desk to shove into his bag and when he heard the click of his door shutting, he finally looked up.

“You’re interviewing for the department head job, right?”

Poe stood up straight, adjusting the strap of his bag on his shoulder. “What about it?”

“Did you know that job was all but promised to me? Snoke spoke to me personally and said it was mine. Instead, Organa’s got people lined up to interview for it.” Hux sneered. “Absurd, if you ask me.”

“Hey,” Poe warned.” She’s doing her job. Snoke didn’t have the authority to just give you the job.”

“Yes, apparently he doesn’t.”

Hux studied Poe, and Poe gave him a confused look. “Is that all you needed?”

“I’ve been talking with the other candidates one by one. Some have taken themselves out of consideration.”

Poe raised an eyebrow.

“Is that what you came here to do? Talk me out of interviewing for this job?” He smirked and chuckled lowly. Hux just smirked back at him.

“Not quite.”

He pulled his phone out of his pocket, unlocking it and handing it to Poe. Zoomed in on the screen was you, car keys in hand and a very clear view of a red spot on your neck despite the dark backdrop. Poe furrowed his brow and looked up from the phone to Hux. His pulse had quickened drastically and Poe hoped he wouldn’t see Hux couldn’t see him start to sweat.

“She’s dog sits for me.” Poe said with an even tone. He’d had that lie in his mind from the minute you started seeing each other, just in case he’d ever need to use it.

“See, I don’t think so,” Hux said with a twisted smirk on his face. “I have it on very good authority that she was seen in your apartment with you—“

“My dog’s been having some behavioral problems lately, so she fills me in on how he was when I was gone—“

“I guess there was a lot of clothing thrown around, including a black lace bra.” Poe’s face went white and he looked away from Hux, wondering who could’ve seen you. He then remembered what night it was when you wore it and it hit him: the pizza guy. He had made a comment about Beebs being hyperactive, which meant he got a glance inside the apartment.

“They have a class together, that’s how he recognized her,” Hux continued, answering the other question Poe was thinking. “He told me what he saw and it only took $100 and three cases of beer to get him to hang around outside your building a few times to see if he saw her again. I have a few more pictures if you’d like to see them.”

An anger that Poe had not experienced in years burned inside of him. He slammed the phone down onto his desk, the picture of you disappearing off the screen.

“What do you want?” Poe’s voice was low and dangerous, like he was a few seconds away from putting Hux in a chokehold.

A wide smirk crossed Hux’s face.

》》》

Poe: Can you come over? We have to talk.

You stared at the ominous message on your phone, your heartbeat thumping hard against with anxiousness. The glass of water you had just poured yourself was growing cold in your hand.

“Y/N!” Your head snapped up and you were met with a weird look from Karé, who was staring at you over her laptop on the couch. “I asked if you wanted cheese or pepperoni.”

“Oh,” you said, not even realizing she had asked for your preference. “Um…whatever you want. Cheese, I guess.”

Karé looked at you with confusion as she finished ordering the pizza. When she glanced at you again, she saw you still staring at your phone. Karé tossed her computer aside, getting up and walking over to you. She looked over your shoulder at your phone and grimaced. “Not good. Who’s that from?”

“Poe.”

Your roommate froze, her face turning into confusion. “I thought things were really good between you.”

“They were! They are!” You exclaimed, putting your phone down and crossing your arms. “Things have been amazing since we got back from spring break. We’re supposed to take Beebs on a late night walk tonight. I don’t know what happened that could’ve prompted a ‘we need to talk’ text…”

“I’m sure it’s nothing,” Karé said. “Maybe it’s about what you’re going to do after graduation.”

“Well, that’s not a nothing conversation either,” you pointed out. The front door opened and shut, Jessika’s loud voice announcing her presence to her roommates.

“I have ice cream!” She happily exclaimed, holding up a grocery bag with three pint sized ice creams inside, but she frowned when she saw your expression. “Whoa, what happened?”

“Poe said ‘we need to talk’” Karé said and Jessika inhaled sharply.

“Yikes.”

“Not helping, Jess! “ You ran a hand through your hair. “No, Karé’s right. It’s probably nothing.”

You looked at your roommates, both of them looking at you concernedly.

“You’re not convincing either of us.” Jessika gave your shoulder a supportive squeeze. “Go. We’ll be here for you when you get back. Or if you don’t come back tonight, we’ll be here for you tomorrow.”

You gave her an appreciative look as you grabbed your phone and wallet and headed out the door. It made you anxious that you didn’t know what you were walking into. Was it going to blow up into a big fight or was it actually a discussion about what you were going to do come summertime when your lease was up and you were all moved in back home?

Either way, you were kind of freaking out.

The drive that was always a short one took forever, which gave your brain more time to overthink Poe’s message and come up with completely ridiculous scenarios that you somehow convinced yourself could be true. You promised yourself that if he broke up with you, you wouldn’t break down until you got back home. You attempted to calm your overly active imagination, knowing full well that neither of you expressed any interest in getting out of your relationship.

Poe’s door was open when you got there and he was perched on the arm of the couch. His arms were crossed and his jaw clenched.

“Is everything ok?” You asked as you pulled up a chair next to him. Poe shook his head.

“No, it’s not.”

He didn’t elaborate any further and you gave him a pleading look. “Ok, you’re really starting to scare me, Poe. What’s going on? Because I think I might know and the entire drive over here I was going over and over things in my head trying to figure out what happened that would’ve made you want to break up with me and—“

“Y/N.” Your rambling stopped immediately and Poe was staring at you with a serious look on his face. “Hux knows about our relationship and he’s threatening to expose it.”

Time stood still. You had forgotten how to breathe for a minute and you moved your mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

“What?” Your voice was a whisper. Poe gave you a pained look as he nodded. “Oh my god.”

“I know.”

“How? We—how does Hux know? There’s no way he would’ve seen us on campus, we’re so careful not to act like a couple in public.”

“You remember the pizza guy from a few weeks ago? He recognized you from one of your classes and told Hux and Hux paid him off to stalk my building and wait for you to come out.”

A groan of disbelief came from you as your head sunk into your hands. You rubbed your face tiredly, shaking your head before looking back up at Poe.

“What does he want?” You asked. “What does Hux get out of threatening you?”

“He wants me to withdraw my name from department head consideration.”

You exhaled deeply. “Fuck. What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. I don’t take kindly to being threatened. I want to protect you and us, but…”

“You want this job.”

You looked at each other, both torn. If anyone asked, Poe would choose you over a job in a heartbeat, but he had worked so hard to get this opportunity, and to have it at his age so early in his teaching career was an incredible feat. It would still hurt a little bit if he lost that. And there was no way you were going to ask him to give something like this up just for you. You wanted to be selfish, have him drop the job to protect your relationship, but you knew how happy this would make him.

Poe’s phone rang, interrupting the tense silence between you. He glanced at the screen.

“It’s my dad.”

“Yeah, of course, take it.”

Poe answered his phone as you walked into his bedroom. You crossed your arms over your chest and paced back and forth, your mind racing with different thoughts.

You never acted like a couple in public, but had you gotten too comfortable with each other that you became careless without realizing it? You wondered how many people saw you standing a little too close when you “coincidentally” ran into each other in the coffee line or who noticed the eye contact that lingered a little too long when talking in class.

Maybe you guys did have this coming.

“My dad says ‘hi’.” Poe said as he came into the bedroom, sitting on the edge of his bed directly across from where you were pacing.

“I hope you told him I say ‘hi’ back,” you said with a small smile.

“I did.”

“What did he say?”

“That I have to make this decision myself,” he said, and you nodded in agreement. Poe studied you for a moment as you resumed pacing, the worried expression on your face the same as his. “What are you thinking?”

You swallowed hard, tapping your fingers against your arm.

“Your dad’s right Poe, this is your decision—“

“I know. But I want to know what you’re thinking.”

You did have an idea, though it would cause great unhappiness for the both of you. You leaned against his dresser.

“Until you get this job, maybe we should…”

Poe’s expression dropped. “Do you—do you want to break up?”

You were silent, tears starting to build in your eyes.

“No. Of course I don’t want to. Our whole relationship has been a challenge from the beginning, pretending like we aren’t together. This—this is just another challenge.” You glanced up at Poe. “But if you want to—“

“I don’t want to, either,” Poe interrupted. “I won’t let Hux take something else away from me.”

You let out the breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding onto.

“So we…take a break?”

“Take a break…but not break up,” you said, the words sounding weird as they broke your heart. “Hux can’t blackmail you if he doesn’t have evidence of us being together, so…I won’t come over for awhile and I won’t go to your office hours unless it’s actually related to class.”

Poe nodded, swallowing back the lump in his throat.

“We can text and call and FaceTime, but…that’s about it for awhile.”

Poe looked down at the ground, shaking his head in disbelief that this was happening.

“You’ve told me so many times how much you want this,” you said quietly, bringing Poe’s attention back to you. “What kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn’t support that? I told you I would do anything to help, and I stand by that. If I will do whatever it takes to help you achieve your goals and your dreams, even if it means not being able to see you the way I want to. Because getting this job is important to you and…”

You wanted to say it, those three little words. You wanted to tell him you were in love with him, but you were pausing your relationship and those words would only complicate things further. So you said the second thing that was on your mind.

“You are so important to me.”

Poe stared at you for a minute before taking two long strides towards you and pulling your face to his. His hands gripped your cheeks as his mouth moved slowly over yours, his tongue meeting yours in a slow dance. Your hands gripped the front of his shirt, expressing every feeling you had into the kiss.

Poe pulled away after a minute, his lips hovering over yours and your breathless pants mingling together. He kissed your lips once more before placing a kiss on your cheek. One arm went around your waist and the other cupped the back of your head, his fingers threading through your hair. Your head rested on his chest, your eyes closed as you took deep breaths to calm your beating heart.

A shaky breath accompanied by a small whimper caused Poe to stop running his fingers against your scalp.

“Y/N…” You felt tears build behind your eyes, the only thing stopping them from falling was your closed eyelids. You shook your head and you sniffled. “Y/N, look at me.”

He moved his hand from your hair to stroke your cheek and your watery eyes lifted to meet his.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

Your lip quivered. “Me too.”

His forehead drops against yours, his eyes closing as he places a soft kiss on your lips.

“Stay tonight,” Poe muttered quietly against your lips. “You’re already here.”

You nodded, releasing the grip on his shirt and running your hands up to rest on the side of his neck. “I don’t—I don’t know if I want to—“

“We don’t have to do anything,” Poe said. “I just want to lay with you.”

You nodded a second time, Poe releasing you to grab a shirt for you to wear. You change out of clothes and into his shirt, crawling into his bed and curling up to him when he slid in beside you.

“I’ll tell President Organa tomorrow that I don’t want to be considered for the job anymore,” Poe said sadly, resting his hand on top of the one you had resting on his chest. You leaned up on your elbow and looked down at him.

“Do you really have to do that?” You asked. “Couldn’t you just tell Hux you’re backing off without actually doing it?”

Poe sighed heavily and shook his head, the hand of the arm he had around you running slowly up and down your back.

“I have a feeling he’s going to check and make sure I actually did it and if I didn’t and lied to him about it, he’ll just go ahead and tell everyone.”

You frowned, sniffling to stop yourself from letting the tears fall. “I’m so sorry, Poe.”

You rested your head back on his shoulder, the steady beat of his heart beneath your ear calming you.

“You’re important to me, too,” Poe muttered quietly, kissing the top of your head. “I’d do whatever it takes to protect you.”

You hugged Poe to you tighter, the few tears that gathered in your eyes falling and soaking his shirt. You knew this wasn’t a forever thing and maybe you were being a little overdramatic crying over it. But you couldn’t help it. Your heart was broken for so many things; that you were being blackmailed, that he was going to lose out on his dream job, and that, for the foreseeable future, you wouldn’t get to be around him.

And you loved him. Which made everything more complicated.

Poe buried his head in your hair, the attempt to calm the sinking feeling in his stomach failing. He memorized the way you felt in his arms, the smell of your hair, and the way your face lit up whenever he said something funny. He didn’t know when he’d be able to enjoy those things in the comfort of his apartment again.

Things were going so well. You had just spent an amazing couple of days with him, both in his hometown and at the apartment before classes resumed again. This really hurt the both of you,

You and Poe stayed up as late as you could, not really saying much but just holding onto each other tight. You were both afraid that if you closed your eyes the morning would come too soon.

Both of you were too stubborn to admit out loud just how heartbroken you were.

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#poe dameron x reader #poe dameron x y/n #poe dameron angst #back to you series #modern au #modern poe dameron

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soldierkiara · 4 years

Text

You wiped your forehead with your sleeve, eyes scanning over the patrons of your bar. You didn’t have long to stop and pause, however, drink and food orders barked in your direction by impatient and inebriated patrons. You skillfully began making drinks while inputting food orders; you had been in this business for quite a long time, so you had very quickly become accustom to the fast paced environment, as well as the sour moods of drunk men who didn’t get what they wanted fast enough.

“What can I get’cha?” You turned your attention to the unfamiliar man now sitting in front of you at your bar. He was dressed in almost all black, apart from the red bandanna and glowing orange arm, with many gun holsters and a crossbow strapped to his back. His face was most obscured by a large black cowboy hat, and you could just barely see the butt of a cigar hanging from his mouth.

“Whiskey on the rocks.” He said gruffly, not looking up at you. He took the crossbow from his back and began to disassemble it, cleaning the parts on a very dusty and tattered undershirt.

“Alright. Be right there with it.” You replied, slightly intrigued by the mysterious man. The other patrons payed him no mind; it was almost like they weren’t able to see him, that only you could. You poured his drink and slid it down the bar to him, which he caught quite delicately, despite holding a crossbow bolt between his fingers.

You glanced at the clock, noting the time. “Alright everyone, last call.” You shouted over the deafening hum of the patrons. Very few ordered many more drinks, most coming to settle their tab with you and then stumbling out of the bar, tripping down the two small steps and landing flat on their faces in the dirt. Your eyes wandered over to the man once again, who was still cleaning what seemed to be the same bolt. He had barely sipped his drink, you noticed.

When the last few customers stumbled their way out of your bar, you followed them to the door and locked it, turning your Open signs to Closed. The man at the counter hadn’t said anything to you, even as everyone else left. You made your way back around the counter, wiping up spilled alcohol, vomit and other excrement you decided you would rather not know the name of. “I’m not gonna kick ya out just yet, but you won’t be able to stay much longer. Deal?”

The man paused, the glass against his lips. You could see the glass fog slightly as he let out a small, breathy chuckle. “Alright. Thanks darlin’.”

You turned your attention back to your closing duties, though you kept an eye on the stranger. He didn’t seem like the regular drunkard; each word he spoke was planned and seemed to drip with a sort of secret venom. Everything from his posture down to the clothing he wore screamed secrets.

“So,” He said suddenly, causing you to jump. “You the only worker here?”

You paused, not turning around to face him. “No.” You said calmly. “So if you’re plannin’ on trying anything funny, I would heavily advise against it. You may be packin, cowboy, but so am I.”

Again, you got a small chuckle in response. “You’re quite the firecracker, huh? A stubborn gal?”

“You could say that.” You turned, placing a hand on your hip. “Who’s askin’?”

You watched as the cowboy downed the rest of his drink, the crossbow assembled once again and sitting next to him on the bar counter. “No one special.” He replied with a shrug before pulling a cigar from his pocket and lighting it.

“Fine. Now that you’re done your drink, I suggest you scram before you say or do anything that you might regret.”

The man raised his head to look at you fully, an amused and almost bored smile on his face. “Is that a threat, young lady?”

“It’s a warning.” You said as you scanned the features of his face. These deep brown eyes locked with yours, the scent of copper and his cigar wafted over you. Brown hair mostly obscured by his hat, as well as a matching beard to go with his hair.

“There’s no point in trying to memorize what I look like.” The man said with an infuriating grin. “You won’t be able to tell anyone who I am or what I look like.”

“Oh? And why’s that?” You growled, your heart racing in your chest. Your hand instinctively flicked to your waist where your gun was.

“My name is Jesse McCree. Ever heard of me?” He took a few steps closer, his grin widening as you stepped back.

“No.” You replied, not letting your voice waiver. “You’re probably just some nobody who thinks he can scare me.”

Jesse McCree shrugged, and you saw his eyes flick down to your waist as well when your hand moved. “Maybe so.” He flicked some ashes from his cigar onto the floor. “Look, darlin’, you’ve pissed off some rich people, and they’ve put a bounty on your head.” He stepped closer, smirking as your back pressed against the wall. “I want that reward. You must be pretty damn special, or seriously infuriating to get half a million dollars for a bounty.” He placed his hands on either side of your head, leaning down so he was eye to eye with you. “Unfortunately, they wanted you alive, so be a doll and go quietly, will you?”

You let out a muffled yell as he pulled you against him, his arm around your neck in a chokehold. You clawed furiously at his arm, unable to reach your gun with his other hand. With each hit against his arm, you were met with only a metallic bang. You tried to yell again for one of your employees, but your mind grew too fuzzy to make a sound.

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icecreambeach · 4 years

Note

a prompt I hope you saw coming: McCree, sunning his butthole

I did my best to live up to this real-life comedy gold.

So this takes place very early on in the gang’s reunion, when they’re still training as a team and Hanzo/Genji are still a little tense with each other. (Hopefully I kind of conveyed that through context clues alone but just wanted to be sure since I didn’t want to spend a lot of time polishing this because I have lol zero time.)

I hope it TAINT bad. : - D

The simulation is set: nine opponents, fourteen hazards and two environments. McCree figures the first will be blizzard—why else would Mei be up in the box, waving down at them with that innocent smile?—but he has no clue on the second.Probably it has something to do with Genji, since he’s over half an hour late.

“It’s not like him,” mutters Angela, a little too opaque to show any judgment.Hanzo’s judgment, however, is very clear; he snorts loud enough for even Winston to look over, and he’s all the way up in the box with Mei.“I’m sure he’s just puttin’ the finishing touches on things,” Jesse drawls, nudging his boot into the concrete to scratch an itch on his heel.

“My brother is not one for keeping to a schedule,” says Hanzo. The effort to keep any bitterness out of his tone must’ve been monumental.

Jesse’s a quickdraw with more than a gun, so he’s a little miffed when Reinhardt gets to be magnanimous before he can: “I have seen people change in greater ways and in far less time than in our Genji.” He clasps a hand on Hanzo’s shoulder and Jesse feels even more miffed when the archer doesn’t bristle and brush Reinhardt away like his usual character would dictate. “Perhaps he will surprise you.”

Hanzo seems to hum and cough at the same time. Reinhardt takes his hand back and Jesse licks his teeth behind his lips. “Dunno ‘bout that, Rein. Dickin’ off to meditate is still dickin’ off.”But both Reinhardt and Hanzo give him looks of disappointment and displeasure, respectively. Jesse coos out air like the room is getting hot, looking up at nothing, then turns instead to Angela, who is masterfully ignoring the entire situation.

“You get those new bio-shots in yet, doc?”“Not yet. But the shipment should come any day now. It’s not unusual for that kind of order to take so long. I once tried to have two gallons of e-CTM delivered to a safe house in Bucharest and the driver—”“Oh thank Christ,” Jesse mutters when Genji jogs into the room.“Forgive my lateness,” says Genji. “Torbjorn had not yet finished our suits.”The whole team squints at him. “Suits?” says Reinhardt.

Genji sets down twin crates and hits a button on their sides to let them snap open. “Winston wanted me to set the environment today, so I decided on fire.”Hanzo scoffs even louder than before. Jesse gets the feeling there’s some joke he’s not in on.Reinhardt, ever doe-eyed, persists: “fire?”“Yes. But these suits are not fire-repellant. They are fire-attractive.”Angela actually sounds intrigued, if a tad apprehensive: “come again?”“They will attract fire.” Genji takes out a suit and holds it up; it looks like a Tour de France onesie, only with far shorter shorts. Jesse thinks he’d be shocked if they even cleared his inner thighs. “Particularly to the torso and head.”“Gotta be shittin’ me,” mutters Jesse, turning away, spurs clicking.“Ridiculous,” rumbles Hanzo.“I do not see why I deserve such dissent,” Genji says, his robotic voice a lofty, melodic drawl. “I have designed this course to mimic the eventuality of a burning building. Something most of you would have difficulty overcoming,” he adds with a carefree lilt and tilt of his head. He leans towards the room com link on the wall and holds down the button, carrying his voice to the box above as well as the entire room. “Winston, Mei—you’ll find the simulation code under command 12-A.”

“If you are selecting an environment in which you are already an expert,” Hanzo drawls back, his own voice the total opposite of carefree, “then what is the point of your participating?”“It will still be a challenge for me. I have not been in the position of having to assist other teammates during a battle for a long time.”“Yes,” Hanzo crosses his arms, and Jesse pre-winces before the man even finishes, “Your position is more often far behind enemy lines, getting yourself injured and then calling for help.”Genji crosses his arms, too, though he keeps his tone light. “Now, brother. That was long ago.”“So that has never happened, then?” Hanzo quickly fixes his intense gaze on Angela, who hesitates just one second too long; Hanzo looks back at Genji with the most superior smirk Jesse has ever seen.Genji rolls back one shoulder, seemingly unperturbed. It’s hard to tell with the mask. “Overwatch is based on teamwork. We have all been in the position of requiring help from time to time. That is the reality of working with others—something that you, perhaps, could benefit to learn.”“I have worked in groups many times, as you are well aware.”“And the general of a group, what is their position, often?”“I do not have to explain myself to you.”“No, you just need to adhere to the new order of things.”“You should adhere to—”“I can’t wear that!”Everyone turns to look at Jesse.

The gunslinger clears his throat—he hadn’t really meant to shout—and squares his hips towards Genji. “I can’t put that on.”Genji lowers his arms and puts one hand on his hip, obviously sensing another mutineer. “And why not?”“There’s no way those things ain’t gonna ride up my groin like they’re goin’ for a chokehold. You ever see those boxer-briefs where the legs are just a tad too short on a guy with big thighs? Turn into tighty-whities before you can—”“Oh, please,” says Angela, barely suppressing an amused, if a little grossed-out grin. “I’ve seen you wear far more uncomfortable things for a mission, Jesse. It will only be for a couple hours.”“Certainly!” Reinhardt half-lifts his axe, “Remember those wet-suits in the North Sea? I could hardly breathe! And we were in those all day. Also, my thighs are far—”“Well I wasn’t dealin’ with localized bodily damage at the time, Rein.”“Damage?” Angela looks him up and down. “Are you hurt?”“Naw,” Jesse pulls the brim of his hat down, which he quickly realizes he should not have done, because most of them know him well enough to take that as a clear signal that he is hiding something. “I mean… not in any… it wouldn’t interfere.”

“It seems to be interfering now,” says Genji.“Jesse, if you are injured, you cannot just keep it to yourself. What if we had to ship out today?”“Tell us what it is, Jesse,” says Winston over the room com. “Better to take care of it now.”“It don’t need takin’ care of!” Jesse grumbles, his voice growing louder without his consent. “I just… I can’t be wearin’ shit like that.”Genji looks at the suit still in his hand, then slowly back at Jesse, who feels all the hairs on his arms stand up. “Is it a…” He gestures vaguely to his own pelvic area.“No! Jesus. I mean… not in the way you’re…”

Jesse’s throat closes up as he realizes the deep, deep hole he’s dug under his own feet. Everyone is staring at him with varying levels of suspicion, except for Hanzo, whose face looks more like… alarm? Apprehension?

Jesse sighs. Just get it over with.

He mumbles under his breath.“Sorry?” says Angela. Genji takes a step closer.“I sun-burned my perinmhihmm,” Jesse mutters a little louder, still barely legible.“Wait,” says Genji, who physically removes the com-link from the wall and holds it up to Jesse’s mouth, holding down the button so that his voice echoes like God’s judgment. “Can you just,” the cyborg almost trips over his barely-suppressed laughter, “Can you repeat that please Jesse?”Jesse stares him dead in his green-lit visor and, in his most confident drawl, announces to the entire room: “my pucker hole is crazy burned.”

The laughter hits them all differently: Genji’s head flies backwards with a sharp bark that dissolves into ludicrous snorting, Reinhardt brays one loud note that bounces off the walls again and again, Angela covers her mouth and laughs until Jesse sees her whole face turn red, and Hanzo, also hiding his mouth with his hand, lets his chuckles mostly just shake around inside his chest. He’s the only one who doesn’t look away from Jesse.

“Alright.” Jesse looks up towards the box where Mei is leaning over a console as if having a heart attack and Winston is trying to make sure she’s okay through his own chortling. “Alright, now. Ain’t that goddamn funny.”“Are you shitting me?” Genji, barely able to stay upright, shakes his open hand fingertips-first at Jesse, “How? How could that have possibly happened?”“It’s… it’s a type a’yoga! Shit. You never heard of it?” Jesse puts his hands on his hips, decides he might as well own it. “S’called ‘perineum sunning.’” While Genji collapses into laughter all over again, he goes on, “S’all about absorbing the sun into your body through your… your grundle.” Genji is almost on the floor now, repeating the word ‘grundle’ to himself like it’s a holy mantra. “I been having, y’know, trouble sleepin’ and the like… thought it’d boost my auric field with the power o’the sun and whatnot. Keep my life force from leaking out and all.”Now Genji is repeating ‘leaking’ to himself in a very high-pitched voice while Angela, bless her, manages enough self-control to speak. “Joking aside… Jesse, that does sound serious. Have you… done anything…?”“No! What am I supposed to do? Stick a biotic emitter up there and hope for the best?”“N-no,” says Angela, still fighting giggles but blessedly stepping in front of Reinhardt and Genji, who are both using Reinhardt’s hammer as a kind of crutch for their hysterics. “But some burn ointment may help. Do you have any aloe vera?”Jesse snorts. “Yeah… probably in my kit somewhere.”“You should apply some. Perhaps… perhaps you should sit out this session to do so. We can… ping Lucio to replace you.”“God, yes, please,” Genji wheezes, “Please let’s bring Lucio out here.”Fully aware that Lucio is not really an appropriate replacement for what he brings to the table, Jesse grumbles a thank-you and turns heel for the door. But right before he exits (since Genji and Reinhardt are still laughing), he sticks his head back in to add: “it’s an ancient fuckin’ Taoist practice!”

An hour later, someone knocks at Jesse’s door. He almost ignores it, but at the second knock—faster, snappier—he gets up to at least see who it is. If it’s Genji and Lucio come to taunt him, he can at least open the door with his gun in his hand.But it’s Hanzo, standing all regal with his hands resting inside his kimono jacket. Obviously still amused but doing a good job of trying to hide it. A much more welcome sight, despite everything.

Jesse taps the door command and leans on the frame with as much swagger as he can muster. “Well hey there. Sim went by kinda quick, huh?”“Yes,” says Hanzo, those perfectly-shaped lips toying with a smirk, “It was difficult to achieve adequate team cohesion after your… announcement.”“Well, ain’t my fault we’re workin’ with a couple’a gigglin’ frat boys,” Jesse sighs, stepping aside.

The door hisses shut behind Hanzo, who immediately walks to the console. “Athena, cease surveillance of this room. Command three dash eight hundred and four.”“Confirmed,” says Athena.“Still don’t know how you managed to swipe Winston’s command codes,” chuckles Jesse.“It was a crime of necessity.” Hanzo comes up close, presses against Jesse’s front. Chin tipped up to smirk at him. “I don’t want anyone seeing or hearing what I do to you.”Jesse opens his mouth to agree, but Hanzo seizes that opportunity to plant his own mouth there, tugging down on the gunslinger’s chin to line them up. Their arms wrap, their bodies slot, and Jesse lets out a low rumble of pleasure. Hanzo kisses him slower and warmer than he has yet and the effect is melting. Time goes still and Jesse swears he hears a bird singing.

“Wha,” Jesse clears his throat, when it’s over, looks down at Hanzo from heavy-lidded eyes. “What was that for?”“For lying for me,” Hanzo hums. “I will admit,” He playfully unbuttons Jesse’s flannel shirt, “That was the most unorthodox way of getting out of having to show a hickey I have ever heard of, but I commend your creativity.”“Huh?”Hanzo gently pats Jesse’s cheek, still smiling. “Stay with me, cowboy. I appreciate you keeping our time together a secret. I do not know how the others would have reacted if they saw what I did to your thighs.”“Oh.” Jesse takes a half-step back, still loosely holding Hanzo by the elbow with one hand while the other scratches at a side-burn. “Well… yeah, Han. I know you wanna keep things quiet for now.”“It is for both our benefit,” Hanzo mutters into Jesse’s jaw. “It is… I have never done this before. Nothing like this. I want to take things slowly.”“O’course. I mean, I… y’know I’ve had a shaky run of things, too. Though I’d yell it from the top of the rock this afternoon, if you gave the go-ahead.”Hanzo chuckles, that warm, resonant rumble that Jesse is already falling a little bit in love with. “Perhaps someday.”As he goes to kiss down Jesse’s throat, the gunslinger coughs a little. “Well, there’s… I mean, there’s that, but…”Hanzo’s smile fades as he blinks up at Jesse. A shadow of worry crosses his face and Jesse’s heart spasms in pain. “But what?”Jesse sighs again, only with ten times more despair than in the simulation room.“But I really did burn my pucker hole.”There’s a moment in which Hanzo just stares with gently widened eyes, as if he doesn’t understand. Then a bubble of disbelieving laughter makes his chest contract. “You…” More chuckles bubbles up and Jesse thinks it’d be damn endearing, the way this usually self-controlled man can’t hold back his laughter, if he didn’t feel a very real burn of embarrassment spreading across his own face. Not to mention the burn between his ass cheeks.“You what?” Hanzo asks, as if he is really trying to give Jesse the benefit of the doubt here.

“I went down on you for nigh on an hour yesterday on the top of a cliff with my bare ass pointed at a 3pm sun in the goddamn Mediterranean, Han! What did you think was gonna happen?” Jesse pauses, his eyes fly off somewhere up and to the left, then come back to Hanzo with his tone even higher-pitched: “and you don’t think I’d come up with a better lie than that if I had to!?”

“I didn’t… I am sorry, I did not…” Hanzo is practically choking, his hand slapped up over his mouth again.Jesse sighs. He looks at Hanzo, with his shaking shoulders and his bouncing bang-hair, and a rueful half-smile breaks through his irritation. “S’okay, darlin’. You can laugh. It’s funny.”Then Hanzo lets out a bark of laughter even louder and grander than Genji’s, his head tossing back in a very similar fashion. His hands tremble as they hold onto Jesse’s shirt flaps for dear life. The sight is almost enough to make Jesse forget about the horrible, horrible pain.It’s not long before the archer comes back down to earth. “I,” Hanzo starts, wiping away a tear, “I am deeply sorry for this… for your…”“Yeah, yeah.” Jesse adjusts the waistband of his loose sweatpants, which is about the only article of clothing his ass can stand now. “Never gonna live this one down, y’know that? Genji’s probably gonna bring it up at my goddamn funeral.”“I apologize,” Hanzo says, both hands still holding onto Jesse’s shirt. “Why did you not say something sooner?”“Couldn’t find the right words, I guess.”“‘My pucker hole is crazy burned’ now seem like the only right words.”Jesse scoffs and rolls his eyes and cackles into his hand, then winces as the movement makes his thighs shift too much. Suddenly he turns boyish: “it really hurts, sweetheart.”Then Hanzo draws forward with a sound like a low, rough coo, and smoothes out Jesse’s shirt. “If you are truly in need,” his eyes sweep up to Jesse’s and Jesse can’t express how much that adds to his downstairs discomfort, “I can assist you with that aloe vera.”“Really, Han, you ain’t gotta—”“I insist. It is the least I can do after your…” Hanzo gets closer, smirks with those cat-like eyes dangerously narrowed, “…Skilled favors.”Jesse feels a very different kind of burning and chuckles, looking off to the side. “Aww, Han. I don’t think that’ll be as enjoyable as you’re makin’ it sound…”“I will make it enjoyable.” He lowers his hand and palms over Jesse’s cock to prove his point. Licks Jesse’s bottom lip into his mouth and lets it slide out between his teeth.Well, shit. “Alright,” Jesse sighs, “You insisted and all.”

“Mmm,” Hanzo purrs, still rubbing Jesse through his sweats. “And do not worry about Genji. I know many stories of his that more than overshadow yours.”“As nice as that is, darlin’, I really don’t wanna talk about your brother right now.”“Then stop talking and get on the bed.”

#prompt #mchanzo #asks #robocryptid #my pucker hole is crazy burned #robo-cryptid

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exasperatedfey · 5 years

Text

Family Is What You Make of It

Hal got the call in the middle of a battle with Darkseid. “Kyle, awesome timing. We’re getting our asses handed to us right now. Get over here, and bring Simon and Jess while you’re at it. Guy too.”

“I can’t.”

“Too bad.” Hal dodged a blast and sent one back. “We need you.”

“No I mean I physically can’t. Which is actually why I’m calling.”

His heart stopped. “Are you okay? Are you injured?”

“I’m fine! I’m just…in jail.”

His heart stopped again. “I’m sorry, you’re where?”

“…Jail…”

Of course. Well, this wasn’t the first or last time Hal had to bail out a fellow corps member. That didn’t mean he was happy about it, and he tried to infuse as much of the ‘I’m-not-mad-just-disappointed’ sentiment into his voice as he could. “On what planet?”

“Myrera.”

Were Hal not in the middle of a life or death fight he would have pinched his nose. He settled for a heavy sigh after sending a boxing glove construct at some robots. “Of course.”

“So…can you come get us? Please?”

“I can’t I’m fighting-wait,” Hal’s eyes narrowed. “Why did you say us?”

“Uuuuhhhhh”

“How many of you are in there?”

“Well all things considering, there aren’t that many of us considering the size of the corps-”

“Kyle.”

“…Seven? Including me?”

“WHAT?” Hal snapped the neck of a doombot he’d had in a chokehold (Barry would later say this was when the Dad Instinct™ took over his body. Hal would later laugh in his face). “Who–? Nevermind. I’ll find out later. But you’ll all have to hold tight until this battle is over. John and I will swing by when we can.”

“Don’t bring John!”

“Why would you say that? What did you do?” Hal could physically feel his blood pressure rising. If they had accidentally murdered someone important this would be a disaster. It hadn’t happened in the corps yet but that wasn’t indicative of anything really. He took his panic out on another doombot by kicking the shit out of it.

“Nothing bad! I swear! I just don’t him to judge us.”

His blood pressure went back to normal. Kyle was a horrible liar, so nobody was dead. Probably. “Too bad. If seven Green Lanterns get arrested it’s his business.”

“Fine,” sighed Kyle.

“See you in a bit.” Hal looked up at the sky full of doombots. “I hope.”

“Bye. Good luck.”

“Thanks. Ring, hang up.” Hal was suddenly conscious of Oliver snickering in the bushes as he fired off arrow after arrow. “Not a word.”

“Karma has come to the childless bachelor at last.”

“Shut up and fight.”

Oliver didn’t say anything more, but he did continue to laugh. Hal needed better friends. Case in point, the first words out of John’s mouth when Hal approached him after the battle was won were “What did you do now?” Which was fair.

“This time it isn’t me. Kyle and six other lanterns are in jail on Myerna.”

John sighed (which was a big mood, as Jess would say). “I’d bet my ring Guy is one of the six.”

“Is that even a question?”

Technically it was, and the answer was yes (as always). But the other lanterns waiting sheepishly in the cells were a surprise. John had left to go pay bail which left Hal to lecture. “Sodam, Jade. What are you two doing here?”

Jade looked him in the eye as she gestured to Kyle, who looked like he wanted to die.

Sodam on the other hand, just nodded in Hal’s direction. He seemed resigned to the nonsense around him. Or it was teenage aloofness. Hal wasn’t sure which, or even if Sodam was a teen. It was hard to tell sometimes whether his special brand of recklessness was young-and-dumb twenty-something (well, his species’ equivalent), or teenager. He made a mental note to yell at the Guardians if it was the latter. John would help, he was good about those sorts of things. Guy too, for that matter.

“Nevermind. What happened here?”

“Well, it’s a real funny story–”

“Shut up Guy,” hissed Kyle.

“What? I’m just sayin’ once you get past the jail part–”

“Can someone who isn’t Guy tell me what’s going on?” asked Hal.

The cell was filled with Lanterns shuffling around.

“There was an artifact–Ow!” G’nort glared at Soranik, who was doing her best impression of someone who was totally innocent.

Jade glared at him. “Wait until we’re out of here to tattle dumbass.”

“I’m not tattling! I’m just answering the question.”

“So tattling.” Jade narrowed her eyes into a glare. G’nort did his best not to wilt under the full force of Jade’s wrath. “It’s your fault we’re in here in the first place. God, we shouldn’t have brought you.”

That snapped him out of it. “Hey!”

Hal felt the beginning of a headache as Oliver’s comment from earlier rang in his ears. “That’s enough. Jade, don’t be so mean to your fellow corps member. You’ll all be dealt with accordingly when we get out of here.”

G’nort looked relieved. Hal made sure to look him in the eye. “All of you.”

“I believe this is primarily my fault,” said Laira from the corner. It looked like she’d been meditating. “As I was the one to recognize the artifact that caused all this trouble. To ensure we don’t get in even more with the local authorities, I’m afraid I can’t explain more until we’ve left.”

So they’d committed more crimes in addition to what they’d been caught doing (trespassing). Perfect. “That’s fine, as long as we get the full story eventually.”

John walked over to them, a Myernan guard at his elbow. Hal stepped aside as the guard tapped an access code. The clear cell wall disappeared and the seven lanterns shuffled out, not meeting John’s eye. Hal didn’t blame them. John’s glare made Jade’s look like nothing by comparison. That’s why he was corps leader (and you know, the leadership skills).

Soon Myerna was behind them. But before they could fly far, Soranik’s eyes widened. “We can’t leave yet!”

John stopped and turned around. His eyebrow started the slow climb up his forehead. “And why not?”

“Because we have to wait for Simon and Jess! This was the meeting spot for when they got back.”

Hal decided to put that heart attack on hold and instead focused on two green blurs of light speeding towards them. “I don’t think we’ll have to wait long.”

John turned to Soranik, who was suddenly very interested in some space dust. “Care to tell me why a group of senior lanterns would decide to drag their less experienced fellow corps members into disaster?”

She was saved from having to answer by Simon and Jess skidding to a stop beside them. They were covered in soot and grinning from ear to ear. “Hi guys! Good news, the artifact doesn’t actually need it’s twin to be activated. We were able to get it going and the planet is…” Jess’ voice trailed off as she noticed Hal and John.

“Go on,” said John.

“It’s all good now,” said Simon.

“Wait, what? You mean we got arrested for nothing!” said G’nort, his fur bristling.

“Shut up G’nort,” hissed Jade.

It was too late. Comprehension had dawned on Simon and Jess’ face and was replaced by an expression Hal could only describe as the smugness of outfoxing an older sibling (Hal had been on both sides of it throughout his childhood. Oh the joys of being the middle child). In this case it was senior lanterns, but the sentiment probably wasn’t much different. Then Simon and Jess began to laugh.

“What did you even do?” asked Jess.

Lyra shifted. “We made a rather egregious error, I’m afraid.”

“It seemed like a good idea at the time,” said Guy.

Kyle sighed. “Guy, name one time you’ve had a good idea. Ever.”

“Hey! I’ve had plenty.”

Soranik snorted. “Sure, and I’m human.”

“Oh man, I can’t wait to hear this,” said Simon. He and Jess had stopped laughing, but were still grinning from ear to ear.

“Me too,” said John. “But we’ve been on this planet long enough. You all can explain just what you were doing in a sacred temple on the flight back to Oa.

And so seven voices all piped up at once, giving slightly different versions of the event. Hal started flying next to John and got ready for a very interesting story.

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chloes-yellow-cup · 6 years

Text

Nowish - Part 7

Bechloe. Staubrey. Bellas Squared/Stechlobree.

A story in which I convinced myself by accident that this could work. Let me try and convince you too.

Nowish Master Post - Everything on one page.

A Shared Lifetime - All my fics

Recommended Mood Music on Spotify. Artistic license taken with song release years.

Note on the links: The ones about music lead to YouTube vids for fun. Rest are GIFs or links to whatever gift idea I have.

Bella Reunion 2017

~B~

Saturday, June 24th, 2017

Beca settled heavily into a chair. “Oh god, I don’t think I can dance anymore.” She had never been more thankful she’d decided to go with her sneakers for the reunion.

“What’s the matter, Shawshank? Married life making you slow?” Amy frowned and eyed her as Beca laid her head on the table for a second. “I’d have thought it would have taken a few more years for that to happen.”

“Unlike some people, I have been dancing for the last three hours.” Beca sat up and flagged down one of the wait staff and ordered a beer. “It’s now time to drink.”

Amy nodded sadly. “And turned you into an alcoholic. As expected.”

“What do you mea—Never mind.” Beca shook her head. “I know how this goes. You make weird statements and confuse me and I end up confessing something embarrassing by accident.”

“Aw, but that’s the fun part.” Amy sighed. “And without Bumper here, you know I need to keep distracted until I can get back to the hotel and-“

“Do not finish that sentence if you don’t want to wear my beer, Amy.”

“You don’t have your beer yet.”

“Damnit.”

“But I’ll take it easy on you. Don’t want you to get all worked up thinking about my sexy ass.”

Beca rolled her eyes to the ceiling. “Thank you, Amy.”

Amy slammed back the rest of her drink and pushed up out of her seat. “Time to see a man about a horse.”

Beca watched her walk away then looked back out at the dance floor, smiling at the rest of her Bellas. They were the biggest knot of people on the dance floor, though, surprisingly, not the loudest. The reunion this year was back at Barden, so there was a bigger than normal turnout, with many former members jumping at the chance to see their old stomping grounds.

Beca smiled as Legacy’s mom showed off her signature move which shifted to laughter when she noticed Emily standing to the side with a slightly horrified and embarrassed expression on her face when Chloe jumped next to her and copied it exactly. Katherine Junk was probably one of the coolest parents she had ever met, though Beca never wanted to make her mad after she’d heard about the chokehold over George Michael.

It was weird, being back on campus and not having to run off to class. Or rehearsal, she thought idly as Stacie and Aubrey swung past her line of sight. She had to admit, she sort of missed the radio station. Not the CD stacking part, but when Luke had finally let her DJ regularly her sophomore year. That she missed. She even, sort of but not really, missed Jesse and his movie chatter. They didn’t get to talk nearly often enough.

“Penny for your thoughts.” Cynthia Rose dropped down on her left and Beca smiled.

“Hey. Nothing, really. Just thinking of what it’s like being here and not having to…” her fingers waved through the air. “Rush anywhere. Do anything. Be…”

“Responsible? So tired you can’t see straight?” Cynthia Rose paused. “Not like that last was a problem for me, exactly.”

Beca nodded and laughed. “Exactly. Adulting is weird.” Her beer arrived and she dropped enough money on the tray to cover a generous tip. “They just… turn you loose. Like you’re just… ready. Done baking. Go forth into the world, young student.” She shook her head. “I so wasn’t ready.”

“You seemed to have landed on your feet.”

Beca smiled again, softer this time. “I got lucky.” Cynthia Rose snorted. “Not like that, perv.” But she grinned with her. “I knew I had you guys if I stumbled. Even if I’d had to do it without those 3 lunatics I drove across the country with. I knew I had support, even from my dad, there at the end.”

“Married life mellowed you, Becs.” Cynthia Rose told her. “This is the longest, most positive thing I have ever heard you say.” Her expression turned sly. “Except when Stacie recited that speech you made to Aubrey on her birthday.” She laughed when Beca pushed on her shoulder.

Beca picked at the label on her beer, but continued. “I also got lucky with my job. This could have been a lot harder than it was.” She sipped from her bottle. “Should have been harder. So, I’m grateful to all you aca-bitches for not kicking me to the curb when I was an insufferable…”

“Smart ass? Cynthia Rose raised an eyebrow. “Tiny dictator who made us all run laps when she was in a bad mood?”

“That all works.” Beca tipped her bottle at her. “Legacy always said her mom told her that kind of stuff all the time. ‘The Bellas will be your family.’ I was so glad that she wasn’t wrong. And that my… fear? That seems to fit my main emotion our senior year… didn’t cause us to lose the chance for upcoming generations to be Bellas.”

“Well, most of that was Muffgate, but… I get what you mean, though I didn’t think of that until we were at Worlds.” Cynthia Rose sat back in her chair. “I thought I knew. But it took seeing all the other Bellas there, ready to give their all for us, who almost lost it all over a stupid mistake, before I realized, really realized, what we had become.”

Beca said it with her. “Family.”

“That’s beautiful.”

Cynthia Rose and Beca both jumped at the new voice and looked to their left. Cynthia Rose put her hand on her heart. “Lilly! Jesus! Where did you come from, girl?!”

Beca tried to stop her own pulse from racing. “I’ve given up asking. She just kind of… appears.” It was also usually the only time Lilly’s voice was audible without leaning closer than you really wanted to. Lilly smiled, like she knew what Beca was thinking. ‘Oh god, have you been a mind reader all this time? I’m so sorry for all the dirty thoughts I have ever had about Chloe when you’re around!’

Lilly just stared at her before she looked away, saying something Beca couldn’t hear this time. She looked over at Cynthia Rose who was closer.

“She asked about TWA™ and if she showed up this year.” Her eyes cut right and looked back at Beca. “And then something about having plastic sheeting stashed in the basement at the Bella house if we need it.”

Beca swallowed hysterical laughter. “No, she’s not here. Stacie says it’s because she’s afraid of me. Apparently my rant that first year was noticed.”

Cynthia Rose cocked her head and gave Beca a Look. “It was in the middle of the bar, at full volume, after your fifth drink. You jumped on your chair and yelled - I’m going to paraphrase here – ‘Where is That Whore Alice™? Bitch is a hoor’ – which you totally pronounced that way, Becs – ‘and I’m going to punch her in the tits for being mean to my best friends for three years.’”

Beca smirked. “Yeah that. Stacie heard from Aubrey that it got around, and may have scared her off.”

“Good. Though, if you need some help.” Cynthia Rose leaned forward. “I know people.”

Beca growled. “To take out the trash? Psh, nah.”

“Trash?”

Beca looked up as Jessica and Ashley took seats across the table, Jessica smiling after her question. Before she could answer, arms wrapped around her neck. She wondered what it meant that she knew it was Stacie by the size of the boobs against the back of her head as a chin rested on the top of it. “If Beca’s talking about trash at a Bellas reunion, we’re talking about That Whore Alice™.”

Flo walked past Stacie and sat down at the table. “In my country, the man that bought her would be trying to get his goat back.”

Beca laughed then patted the arms looped in front of her. “Aw, Stace. You do get me.”

“Stop sweet talking me when our wives are out of earshot.” Beca felt Stacie jump after a sharp smacking sound. ”Oops.”

“Sweetie, stop sweet talking Beca when your wife walks into earshot.” Aubrey took the seat on Beca’s right. “You know it makes Beca adorably flustered.”

Stacie shrugged around Beca’s head. “She is cute when she’s flustered.”

Beca just grinned and watched as the rest of her Bellas found spots at the table, dragging over chairs as necessary. Amy came back with a half empty bottle of tequila and a stack of red Solo cups.

“Oh god, no. Amy. Not…” Beca trailed off as the rest of them cheered. “I mean. Yay.”

Stacie kissed her cheek. “C’mon Becs, it’ll be like old times.” She let Beca go and pulled a chair over beside Aubrey.

“If I puke in the bushes ‘like old times’ someone is going to pay.” Beca noticed a look flash between Legacy and Cynthia Rose, whose eyebrow went up just a fraction. She hoped she’d remember to ask Legacy about it later but the outlook wasn’t good now that Amy was pouring ‘shots’ into the cups. They looked overly generous to be legitimately called ‘shots’.

“Don’t worry; I’ll hold your hair.” Chloe’s voice whispered in her ear before she settled herself on Beca’s lap, who immediately wound an arm around Chloe’s hip to hold her in place. “Again.”

“Thanks babe.”

As Amy passed out the drinks, Mrs. Junk (because really, Beca couldn’t call her anything else) came up. “Ooooh, tequila!” When Amy passed her a cup, she gave it to Legacy who gaped. “What? Don’t be shocked. You turn 21 soon enough. One won’t kill you.” The rest of the Bellas cheered as Amy poured another one for her. “I know this isn’t your first drop of alcohol, Em. I’m your mother, not blind.”

“It’s my first tequila?” Emily squeaked out. “If it helps?”

Once everyone had their cups, they all looked at Beca. She raised her glass, feeling love rising over her like a wave from all directions.

“Bellas for life!”

“BELLAS FOR LIFE!”

Beca shook her head and tossed the shot back, thinking that she almost didn’t have this in her life.

How stupid she’d been.

“Gross!” Emily stuck out her tongue. “Why would you ever…” She gulped the water her mother handed her.

How very lucky.

#bechloe fanfiction #bechloe #staubrey #bellas squared #wlw #beca mitchell #chloe beale #aubrey posen #stacie conrad #anna kendrick #brittany snow #anna camp #alexis knapp #stechlobree #Pitch Perfect #bechloe fic #bellas fluff #Nowish #A Shared Lifetime

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