#what if she deserved the chance to experience true friendship!!!!

[shigaeru]

what if the three monsters were best friends, what then

#Durarara!! #Shizuo Heiwajima #Celty Sturluson #Anri Sonohara #drrr!! #what if anri got herself a big sister and a big brother as well!!!!!! #what if she deserved the chance to experience true friendship!!!! #what if she found better friends than kida making gross comments about her all day!!!!! #what if they hung out what if they fell asleep on shinra's couch what if they went on a roadtrip!!!

[skzpixiekaifei]

Taglist: @mynameisnotlaura, @palindrome969

Kai: Hey, you want some leftovers?  Minho: What's that?  Kai: You've never had leftovers???  Minho: No, because I'm not a quitter. 

-

Chan: I drink to forget but I always remember.  

Kai: You're drinking orange juice. 

-

Kai: Can we talk about that mass email you sent?  

Changbin: Why? It was important.  

Kai: All it says is, "I'm back on my shit".  

Hyunjin, shrugging: The people need to know. 

-

Kai: *pitches an idea*  

Jeongin, impressed: Huh, there might be something here!  

Seungmin, under their breath: Yeah, a lawsuit. 

-

Kai: You know the sound a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That's the sound that my brain makes all the time. 

-

Kai: Twilight Sparkle was the main character because she represented the element of friendship—  

Hyunjin, tied up: PLEASE, I JUST WANT TO SEE MY FAMILY AGAIN!

Kai: I'M NOT DONE!  

Kai: And Rainbow Dash was the sporty girl— 

-

Felix: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it’s doing to your body.  

Seungmin: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot.  

Felix: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!  

Kai: Hmm... I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free... not sure where you're getting your facts from... 

-

Jeongin: Don't have a bookmark? Try ketchup instead!!  

Kai: What makes you think I read? 

-

Kai: Christmas lights?  

Chan: Check.  

Changbin: Thermos of hot cocoa?  

Chan: Check.  

Felix: Santa suits?  

Chan: Check.  

Kai: Shovel?  

Chan: Check.  

Minho: Alibi and bail money?  

Chan: Check- wait, WHAT?! 

-

Han, taping a knife onto a Roomba: Be free, my child.  

Kai, entering the room with a small cut on their ankle: Who the f- 

-

Changbin: I love you.  

Kai: I love you too. I've waited so long to hear you say that.  

*Kai and Changbin kiss passionately*  

Minho, to Seungmin: You owe me 20 dollars. 

-

Seungmin: Changbin, I don't like you.  

Changbin: What did you say?  

Seungmin: You heard me!  

Changbin, internally: And it turns out I actually didn't hear what the fuck you just said. 

-

Chan: WHOEVER CAUSED THIS MESS IS GOING TO-  

Felix: It was me...  

Chan: ...Is going to be forgiven because everyone deserves a second chance. 

-

Felix: We call that a traumatic experience.  

Felix, turning to Seungmin: Not a "bruh moment".  

Felix, turning to Kai: Not "sadge".  

Felix, turning to Han: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO". 

-

Jeongin: You use emoji’s like a straight person.  

Kai: That’s literally the worst thing anyone has ever said about me. 

-

Hyunjin: What do you think Kai will do for a distraction?  

Han: She'll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That's what I would do.  

*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*  

Han: ...or She could do that. 

-

Kai: Am I a boy? Am I a girl? It doesn't matter. I'm going to burn your house down. 

-

Kai: *cocks gun* Go to Bed. This is no longer a request, This is now a Threat. 

Hyunjin: I’m not stupid, you know.  

Kai: Well, you’re doing a really good impression of it! 

-

*Kai and Felix texting*  

Kai: Come downstairs and talk to me please. I'm lonely.  

Felix: Isn't Hyunjin there?  

Kai: Yes but I like you more. 

-

Jeongin, referring to Han and Felix: Those guys are dorks.  

Kai: Yes, but they’re my dorks. 

-

Seungmin: Is anyone going to tell me what's going on in here?!  

Changbin: It's kind of complicated, but Kai- 

Seungmin: Got it. Forget I asked. 

-

Seungmin: Hey do you wanna hang out this weekend?  

Kai: Generic excuse.  

Seungmin: I can’t believe you said that out loud, to my face.  

Kai: I can. 

-

Felix: CHARACTER. FLAWS. ARE. FUCKING. IMPORTANT.  

Kai: Me when someone tells me to stop eating mayo packets like they’re gogurt tubes. 

-

Changbin: If you want my advice-  

Han: No offense but you’re the last person I want relationship advice from. You tried to kill your significant other. Multiple times.  

Changbin: First off, that was before we started dating. Secondly, they’ve also tried to kill me.  

Hyunjin: It’s true. It was mutually attempted murder. 

-

Kai, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it-  

Seungmin, whispering: Should we call the exorcist?  

Hyunjin, also singing: The taste of his cherry chapstick.  

Chan, appalled: Call the exorcist. 

-

Kai: What’s your name?  

Changbin, whispering to Jeongin: Can I tell Her my real name?  

Jeongin: No!  

Changbin: I’m… Jeongin.  

Jeongin, whispering to Himself: The ONE TIME he gets my name right… 

-

Kai: The shadow realm? No, I’m sending you to Ohio! 

-

Hyunjin: Subs are so fun to play with. All you have to do is hint at what you might do, back them into a corner with a look, or grab their wrist in a certain way and they're a wide-eyed mess.  

Kai: What the fuck kind of Subway are you going to?  

Han: Substitute teachers deal with so much shit.  

Seungmin: Guys. 

-

*at 3am*  

Felix, holding the vlogging camera: *runs into Changbin’s room and turns on the light* Wake up sleepyhead!  

Changbin: *wakes up* Dude!  

Felix: *cackles*  

Kai: *sits up from where they were sleeping behind Changbin* What the fuck, Felix?  

Felix: *jaw drops* Wait WHAT- 

-

Kai: Clownery. Tomfoolery. Absolute fuckery, I am going to revoke your life privileges. 

-

Changbin: Stay foxy.  

Han: Die lonely. 

-

Kai: How many children do you have?  

Chan: Biologically, legally, or emotionally? Because there is a difference. 

-

Chan: Hey, Changbin? Can I get some dating advice?  

Changbin: Just because I'm with Kai doesn't mean I know how I did it. 

-

Kai: “Ladies and gentlemen” is unnecessarily gendered, overly formal, lengthy, and honestly, I’m falling asleep already. “Cowards” on the other hand, is inclusive to all genders, to the point, and dramatic. 

-

Kai: Hey guys, I’m making french toast sticks in the oven. I’m gonna take a quick nap, so wake me up in 5 minutes to flip them over.  

*5 minutes later*  

Jeongin: Kai it’s been 5 minutes, time to flip your sticks.  

Kai: snnnzzzz...  

Jeongin:  KAI YOUR STICKS! 

-

Han: Life is like Kai. It's short. 

#skz #bang chan #changbin #writing #han jisung #hyunjin #lee know #skz imagines #jeongin #lee felix #skzkaifei #seungmin #stray kids #skz 9th member #skz female member #skz female addition #skz female oc #skz oc #stray kids female member #stray kids female oc

[ijustliketoreadstuff]

Adrien’s friendship with Chloe

As we know, Adrien has previously attempted to confront Chloe about her behavior and misdeeds, but unlike the previous times, his confrontation in “Derision” was different, why?, because everything was different .

At the start of the series, Adrien could not easily accept the idea of Chloe being as bad as everyone said she was, after all, they didn't know her like he did, they didn’t have the bond they shared, and so no matter what he saw Chloe say or do, he could never forget the years they spent together as children. They had a history together, a more positive view of one another which could not be easily set aside, and so to Adrien, this lighter side of Chloe was simply a part of her others did not yet have the chance to see

Adrien had a lifelong friendship with Chloe, unfortunately, it was precisely their friendship which left him no other choice but to use to his advantage in a desperate attempt to make Chloe understand the boundaries he was now willing to set between them. Not only to try and put a halt to her actions, but also reveal to her that there was only so much he could bare to watch her do, before he decided for himself that a friendship with her may not be worth upholding. Something which pained him to say to her in situations such as “Despair bear” and “Queen Banana”, but was a possibility he had no other choice but to consider. After all, the people Chloe acted against, were not just strangers, they were his friends, his schoolmates ,they were good people, all of whom had done nothing to deserve the unfair treatment she continued to give them. But regardless of the situation, Adrien was still willing to be compassionate towards Chloe, vouching for her when needed if anyone doubted her in the most important of situations.

(Adrien tries to vouch for Chloe in “Despair Bear”, attempting to convince everyone that Chloe can also have good intentions and her party is nothing to be suspicious about)

(Cat Noir tries to vouch for Chloe in “Antibug” as he realizes Chloe really was trying to help)

No matter how much others would detest Chloe, Adrien could never accept people telling him Chloe was nothing but useless and cruel, because to him, no one was useless, not even Chloe given the years they spent together as children when he was isolated from the rest of the world. Adrien wanted to believe Chloe could change if she had a little help and support in finding the right path to follow, he wanted to believe that no matter what others thought, she was still the same girl he grew up with and cared for, but much to Adrien's dismay, Chloe had different plans and different choices in mind.

(in “Malediktator”, Adrien explains to Marinette why he does not approve of everyone celebrating Chloe’s departure, believing she is not useless given she was the only good friend he had in his life growing up)

Over the course of the series, Adrien saw Chloe have her moments where she would say and do the right thing, and much like Marinette, Adrien had faith Chloe would strive to improve herself now that she had obtained everything they had hoped would help her realize following a path of change would produce better results in her life. But sadly, those moments they saw Chloe experience would all be taken a step back time and again as they watched her continue to find joy in her old ways, not only forgetting everything she had experienced, but also ignoring the people who were willing to be kind to her and offer her another chance. This loop of faith and disappointment repeated itself, and yet despite this, Adrien still could not bare to officially end things between them, even when she pushed him away in "Queen Banana". However, all this came to an end in “Derision”, when Adrien discovered the true extent of Chloe’s actions and the views she had of the world around her.

(Near the end of “Despair Bear”, “Zombizou”, etc. Adrien watches on as Chloe reverts back to her old ways)

Adrien promised Chloe back in “Despair bear” they would be friends forever as she proved to everyone she could indeed be kind to others, but being kind was something Adrien had inevitably accepted was only a brief moment with her and nothing more. Experiences he felt would help guide her to a better path, were quickly left in the past the moment she realized things could once again return to her favor. And as much as he had hoped her being given a second chance to be Queen Bee would help tip the odds in Chloe realizing she needed to abandon her old ways, to his disappointment, the path Chloe chose for herself did not revolve around selflessness and the lessons she learned with them as heroes, but rather the privileges she believed she was entitled to as a result of her new found title (more here)

Near the end of “Derision”, as Adrien saw Kim accept the error of his ways and apologized to Marinette for the things he had done(more here), he thought of Chloe and what she could do for herself by being offered yet another chance. However, unlike his previous attempts to confront Chloe, this was different, because now, it was no longer just an attempt to confront her, it was a moment of truth. Adrien needed to know once and for all if Chloe was truly the person he always thought she was, and yet despite his attempts to offer Chloe the chance to apologize to Marinette and prove to everyone she always had the honest intention to change, in the end, she refused. Revealing to Adrien the one thing he never wanted to accept but could no longer ignore, Chloe did not want to change who she was. Adrien understood Chloe was perfectly capable of changing just as much as anyone, but despite her experiences, despite the consequences, despite the opportunities and despite the people who were willing to reach out to her, Chloe refused to live a life where she couldn't prioritize herself and be prioritized by others.

(In “Queen Banana”, Adrien attempts to help Chloe understand she has done wrong and suggests she make amends for it by first apologizing to the group. However, the more Chloe had attempted to prioritize herself in situations, regardless of how unfair and unjust it was, the more she pushed Adrien away.)

Adrien grew up with Chloe, but this bond they shared was no longer the same child like friendship they grew up with, they were older now, their views of each other changed, and with the two of them now expecting widely different things from one another, it was in “Derision” that the two of them discovered just how different the paths they chose for themselves truly were.

The person Adrien viewed Chloe as, was the person he wished she would inevitably become if he continued to stick by her side, but his hopes of who Chloe could become were his alone, a reflection of what he believed his kindness and efforts could make way to if he held on just a little longer, supported her just a little further, but this change he hoped for Chloe, was not for him to decide, it was Chloe’s, but she didn't want it if it meant living without the luxuries and privileges she had grown accustomed to, privileges which  included tormenting others she believed were simply beneath her.

As Adrien heard Chloe proclaim those of their status had every right to torment others like Marinette for their own amusement and that a romantic love life was something he owed to her alone, he understood that no matter what he said to her, she found no fault in her way of living despite being aware it was morally frowned upon by him and others. Despite knowing she would risk loosing her friendship with him over continuing to prioritize her selfish ways, over time, it didn't matter, because to her, Adrian was the one in the wrong for not abiding by the rules she believed were set for people like them, and for not accepting the romantic future she believed was predestined for them to live out together.

As Chloe refused to listen and understand Adrien’s reasoning about the reality of her actions, Adrien began to reflect on everything he knew about her, everything he had seen along side her, and everything he had experienced in the world away from her, and in the end, he understood it only mattered to him, but not to her.

(Adrien accepts he was wrong about Chloe)

 It didn’t matter if he and Chloe had known each other since childhood, it didn’t matter what he knew about her that made him feel sympathetic and empathetic towards her, and it didn’t matter what bond they use to share, let alone what his hopes were for her, because all in all, he still had his boundaries and so did everyone else, but it was Chloe who was willing to break the boundaries of what was morally and ethically right time and time again, with little to no remorse, and for this, Adrien had decided to end things between them, not just for Marinette’s sake, but for himself as he refused to continue maintaining an unhealthy friendship with someone who cared only for themselves and found joy in hurting others, and if this meant he would now be considered a traitor through Chloe’s eyes, then so be it.

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous tales of ladybug and chat noir #tales of ladybug and cat noir #thomas astruc #ml s5 spoilers #mlb s5 spoilers #ml derision analysis #ml derision #mlb derision #marinette dupain cheng #ml ladybug #cat noir #ml cat noir #chloe bourgeois #ml queen bee #ml fandom #mlb twitter #mlb analysis #ml analysis #mlb derision analysis

[thegreymoon]

The Story of Minglan

Let's see how far through this episode I can get without wanting to smack a man. Gu Tingye in particular.

***

Oh, delightful!

The Emperor has picked up secret gardening and his trusted subjects are there to watch him play with dirt like a baby 🙄

I preferred the old Emperor, honestly. This one seems incompetent, but I am putting my hopes in his son and Gu Tingye to keep the Song Dynasty from collapsing.

***

Shameless 🤣🤣

I love how he just goes up to Emperors and demands they give him things 🤣🤣

That's how he got the spear from the old one too!

***

Oh, Rulan, you don't know what a hard life is even as a concept 🙄🙄

Also, LOL, I love how smug Wang Ruofu looks here 🤣🤣

***

LMAO, I love how Rulan expounds on how true love is the meaning of all joy and happiness and Miglan just looks at her like she's lost her mind 🤣🤣

I know that Minglan will eventually experience romantic love with Gu Tingye and tie her entire life to him, but her current state of mind is such an aroace experience 🤣🤣

***

LMAO, their friendship remains one of my favourite things on this show 🤣🤣

***

I can't watch 😫

Like... I know Gu Tingye already knows about Rulan and her boyfriend. It is a part of his plan, in fact. I know that Rulan will not actually come to any serious harm.

BUT STILL!

This drama has instilled sheer terror of secret romances in me 😖

***

The way he cannot deal, LMAO 😅😅

And he was having such a good day, too!

***

And it is the poor servant being beaten again, smh.

***

Well, it's good to know that at least Wang Ruofu would not let them kill her.

***

I have to say, while I do feel sorry for Rulan for getting caught up in Tingye's bullshit, I love this for Sheng Hong!

Not one daughter, but TWO!! getting caught in an illicit affair 🤣🤣 It couldn't have happened to a more deserving man!

***

Coincidentally 🙄 Accidentally 🙄🙄

But how did he even know that they would be there at exactly that time?? IS HE IN LEAGUE WITH THAT JING FELLOW?

***

LMAO, honestly, if my marriage prospects were the men in this drama, I would sooner become a nun too!

Anyway, Granny is PISSED and I am living!! 🔥🔥🔥

***

Oh, now she's your daughter, is she 🙄

***

LMAO, I love Granny! 💛

***

Is this Rulan's boyfriend?

I don't think I ever got a good look at his face.

***

LMAOOOOO, WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT WON'T BE AGGRIEVING MINGLAN??

SHE HAS MOVED OOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNN!!

Her better options include: 1) marrying Gu Tingye, 2) marrying He Hongwen and 3) becoming a nun.

You have no chance.

***

LOL, you'll settle nothing.

***

LMAO, he's so pleased with himself 🤣🤣

Is sis Hualan matchmaking for him?? 👀 Her husband works for Gu Tingye, after all, it makes sense they would be in on this plan.

***

Said the man who has done nothing but lie, sneak and scheme 🙄

Smack him, Minglan!

I mean, yes, also marry him, but smack him hard first!

***

LMAO, you are about to be served a big piece of humble pie!

I'm going to love every moment of watching you fail!

***

MTE.

#the story of minglan #tsoml spoilers #tsoml ep38

[rosekasa]

🥰 hi tumblr user rosekasa!! 🦋&🍬 fir the ask game?

writers' truth & dare ask meme

hi tumblr user asukiess my beloved 🥺

🦋 ⇢ share something that has been on your heart and mind lately 

ive been reading lots of goddard & rumi lately so naturally ive been thinking a lot about existence and what spirituality means to me. i think im shifting into the kind of place where im becoming okay with not trying to micromanage everything and instead feel settled in the belief that whatever i consider to be true of myself is what will reflect in my experience of life. after spending my whole life feeling like i have to flay myself into doing the right things to 'deserve' to feel good about myself, there's something so wonderful about feeling good about myself by default and watching everything fit into place as a result of that.

and these thoughts, about how our experience is just the shadow of our own consciousness, makes me look at my life and feel so proud of how far i've come in the things i have assumed to be true. and not to be cheesy but our friendship is one i look on a lot ❤️ my feelings for you are so special and unique that there's no possible way I could've welcomed something like our friendship into my life before i believed it was possible to experience something so wonderful

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

ooo. OOOOOOO.

idk if this is unpopular or if i just live in my own head too much but i sincerely believe that adrien is actually more serious when he's comfortable around people rather than sillier. i think goofing off is of course part of his personality but i think as chat noir it comes out in excess because he doesn't really have a chance to express both sides in a regular amount in his normal life. i think the closest we see to his '''''real''''' personality is when he's with plagg, when he's vulnerable and a bit cynical/sarcastic but also still a little naive and sensitive. and i think this can be SO fun to think about in terms of ladynoir becoming more intimate as they grow older (esp in like, fwb/pr established relationship contexts) because ladybug would probably assume that chat noir is just as chaotic and stupid in his personal time as he is as chat noir but then they get a hotel room together and she is so dumbfounded at the fact HE is reprimanding HER for not keeping the curtain in the bathtub while she showers

#ask

[starry-eyed-steve]

Stumbled across you and really enjoyed your takes on the show and the characters. There were multiple things that bugged me about S4 but by far my biggest peeve is that no one felt the need to apologize to Lucas or acknowledge the fact that he was putting his life in danger trying to keep tabs on his teammates. The show + Hellfire treats his decision to play basketball like some big betrayal when really, it's a kid expressing interest in two things equally. Just wish we got a scene for that.

I absolutely agree, Lucas never did anything wrong in this show, and I stand by that. He deserves better!!!

When Lucas looked around and saw those empty seats, knowing his friends didn't have his back. Or worse when they replaced him with his own sister, who was at every game and missed the one where he scored. My heart broke for him in that moment. To think that people who watched the show were pissed at Lucas for hanging out with his teammates when his friends let him down. I would have avoided them as well. And when he realized that something went wrong, he used his position to help his friends. Like, what do people want from him?

In general, it's weird how the show vilianises people who are popular, jocks and athletes. It's not like Lucas ditched his friends. He was still part of hellfire, but the show treats him like a villain for doing sports now. How are those people worse than Eddie, who shamed everyone in that cafeteria with his speech? He's also a judgmental asshole but because the show frames him as the underdog, his actions are not seen as bad. It seems like the Duffers have some unresolved high school trauma where a popular guy wronged them, and now everyone who isn't a loser nerd is essentially the devil.

Back to Lucas, like my boy deserves better plot than what he is given. Don't get me wrong I loved his storyline with Max, Lumax is my favorite ship in the show. But like I mentioned in another post, his struggles as a black kid often gets overshadowed for the romance plotline.

A huge factor as to why he played basketball was the fact that on top of the bullying his friends face, he also had to deal with racism. We deserved to see a Patrick and Lucas friendship where they discuss it or bond about it. If you think about it, the party never really gave a shit about this reason, and the show underplayed it as well. Instead, Lucas sports plot was framed as him turning his back to his friends, automatically painting him in a negative light, even though it wasn't true. He just wanted support from his friends, and they never delivered. If Will was there, I think he would have supported Lucas, knowing how it feels when your friends ridicule your hobbies. An apology from Dustin would have been the minimum. (Mike wasn't there for the plot) At least Erica apologized to him later, but still. Eddie should have spent a bit more time with Lucas and apologized as well. But that's never going to happen because the Duffers refuse to acknowledge they have this agenda towards jocks.

Another point that I wanted to see was Lucas struggling with Billy's death. I know this season was mostly about Max, and I loved how it was dealt with, but I wish we could have gotten Lucas POV as well. Of course, he wanted to be there for Max. He loves her, but it would have been difficult to emphasize after s2 when Billy attacked him for racial reasons. Billy never made it up to Lucas. He could have gotten the chance in s3, but the show killed him first episode and turned him into a monster. That's why I don't believe in a Billy redemption in s3 because the people he hurt (Lucas and Steve) never got an apology. So I really wanted to see Lucas's complicated feelings towards it. (I think it's the main reason Max kept her distance she knows Billy hurt her friends, so they might not understand her.)

In general, the show has a huge problem with how they portray their black characters. Lucas's experiences with racism are not taken seriously. Most of his arc is about a white girl (nothing against Max, seriously, I love them together). Erica is a stereotypical sassy black girl with a big mouth, and when she got tackled by this grown ass man in vol2, nobody really bat an eye. Patrick was the least developed Vecna victim, Fred and Chrissy got so much more screen time. So you can clearly see the pattern through the show.

Lastly, because of the limited amount of time, the show can't address anything. Especially in s4, the plot was super tight. They had to cut out so much. I blame the useless Russian plot because that was so unnecessarily. Anyway, with more time and with more episodes, the plot could have spread out more. The characters would get time to breathe and interact with others more. Traumas could be dealt with in a better, more genuine way as well. But we are stuck with 9 episodes per season. Something has to be cut, and we can't forget the show is created by two white men. Of course, they are not sensible when tackling racist matters. (Btw Caleb also deserves so much better. The fact that he wasn't invited to talk shows and is always kinda left out is absolutely horrible. Plus, the hate he got in s1 just because his character wasn't a big fan of El is unacceptable)

#lucas sinclair #erica sinclair #max mayfield #eddie munson #patrick mckinney #dustin henderson #the party #stranger things #sandra says stuff #anon #anonymous #answered #tw racism

[juniperhillpatient]

I was told to edit my rant to friends & make it a post so here's a semi-edited post explaining why it pisses me off when people think Zuko "deserves" redemption but Azula does not :) It's no secret on this blog that I firmly believe BOTH fire siblings should get to heal & become kinder people who fight for what's right because THAT is the story of Avatar. It's a story about friendship & overcoming & forgiveness.

What anti-Azula people want to ignore is that if you admit that Zuko is complex & became better due to getting a chance you HAVE to accept that the same could be true for Azula!!! Not because of bloodline BS but because they’re from the same family & have the same messed-up dynamics to deal with. And I don’t like it at all when pro-Azula arguments skew anti-Zuko so that’s NOT what I’m saying BUT, we do see more gentleness & desire to relate to her peers & experience belonging from Azula than we do from Zuko even with NO redemption arc. This isn’t me dunking on Zuko. He’s just naturally angrier & gonna need more help getting to the conclusion that he should try & be better. That has to do with both his personality & his history of physical abuse that manifests in him having some serious anger issues as well as trouble connecting with peers. Azula on the other hand? She’s shown to WANT to have normal & healthy relationships with her peers AND with her brother. That’s potentially step one for her for trying to be a kinder person right there. If Azula could just relate to someone OUTSIDE the fire nation - she’s well on her way to changing her views & working to change. Her redemption is the natural follow-up to her story.

#azula redemption #azula

[fellincantation]

Thinking often about Robin's rebirth upon getting amnesia vs Grima's revival. To be reborn as a completely clean slate after what Grima had done is something Robin was given the chance to do. They're able to experience being a human, something Grima has fully denied being despite it being half of their makeup.

I know Heroes is like. Dubious at best but the quotes drive me crazy.

In Heroes Grima is fully capable of being docile when forced to. (Which is exactly why in TOA I feel she's best able to experience some character growth because she's forced to not be herself.) Grima is also far more level-headed when spoken to repeatedly to grow friendship in Heroes. Even if they're displeased having to speak to someone there's still the fact they're willing to share their perspective on humans in depth beyond just "you're worms who deserve to die".

The Fell Vessel Robin expands on Grima's feelings even more.

The Fell Vessel complains about humans saying they want to join together and get along but it's simply not true. Which, unfortunately, Grima isn't wrong. Grima's own followers are an example of this and the Fell Reincarnation says as much in the first screenshot. That humans have no problem asking for divine help but quickly push away their gods when they get what they want.

Grima knows that destruction, violence, war, and disarray are just what happens. To Grima, there's no fixing this and in the end Grima's not wrong that history continually repeats itself. (But obviously the cure for the problem ISN'T to kill everyone just because.)

In Grima's eyes yhe only solution is to kill everyone and everything. To truly reach a conclusion, everyone would have to die. Whether Grima wants something to be born out of the ashes is not clear or implied anywhere so. It seems Grima just wants things to end completely.

However, in Heroes, it seems that Grima is at least partially open to the idea of their mind being changed. That someone would HAVE to prove that everything they believe is wrong and be able to unite people. Otherwise, Grima's ideals are set in stone and are humanity's divine punishment for creating them.

Grima here in TOA is basically going through this whole thing now. Every single interaction shows her different sides of humans (and other homunculi, laguz, manaketes, etc etc) and adds into her experiences. Since this Grima is, at the end of the day, a Grima who has experienced countless lives going back and forth between the start and end of Awakening (since all that is canon) she's pretty worn out. She doesn't see the point at all BUT there are characters who have affected how she views humans as a whole. For her, there very well may be a day when she fucks up and has to flee and hide somewhere else. Does this change her naturally cruel nature, her manipulative personality, and her extreme bitterness? Noooo way.

But it gives me some room to let her grow at least a little bit while still having her be able to return to the events of Awakening with even more bitterness inside of her.

#ooc #headcanons #sort of also a grima analysis in general #and about My grima #just some 2 am thoughts #i'm all over the place and this might not make sense when i read it in the morning #but #grima :softsmile: #edit: THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE UNDER A READ-MORE AND TUMBLR FUCKED IT SORRY i fixed it

[honeybeekao]

hi dino!! i hope you've been having a good day!!

tell me some stuff about madara if you get a chance :o i wanna know more about him!! thankies <3

EEE HI LEO!!!! thank you so much i'm having a pretty good day! drawing a certain little guy we all love and IM SO HAPPY WITH THE OUTFIT DETAILS i never draw intricate things bc im lazy BUT IT'S WORKING!

madara...mmama madara mikejima....him

i'm not sure what things you know but that probably doesnt matter this is my chance to madara essay <333

okayokay so he grew up in the unfortunate environment of His Family Are Deep Followers To The Shinkai Cult. but his first instinct when he saw the boy everyone called a god was to befriend him. he was like "that kid is Absolutely lonely and needs a friend" and he tried!! this was a part of the reason his family labelled him a problem child. (if anything he wasnt a problem child at all, just bad parents.)

befriending kanata meant also testing if him being a god was really true. madara's younger sister being very sick lead him to promising her he could help her, and in turn when he couldn't she became angry with him. that was i Think the first failure (he 100% thinks in terms of failures. even one is irredeemable to him and he believes he's a monster for every mistake he makes)

so because he couldn't cure her, his last option was to make a wish to kanata to cure her—which didn't work, because kanata isn't a god and wields no mystical powers despite what he and everyone believes.

so that was when madara learned that everything with gods and magic were lies, false creations that people turned to for support when the real world was too scary for them. and he made it his goal to try and pull kanata out of that whole situation, along with maintaining a difficult friendship. (kanata's family And his family didn't want madara around him because they knew he was trying to take their "god" away from them.)

madara used to sneak in toys and books to kanata since he wasnt given any, but he usually had to take them apart in order to not get caught. and he would put them back together so they always looked like patchwork (this is told in chapter 2 of Myriad of Colors and Flowers)

despite his best efforts– he did all he could to try and save kanata, but because of how severe everything was it wasn't enough. anytime he became distant due to his family or his own choices at self preservation, kanata's loneliness became worse (knowing what lonely is when you have no one is so much different than when you do. knowing what not being lonely is like makes the feeling even more prevalent.)

so one of madara's main goals is to completely sabotage and destroy the remains of the religion they were born into. he often swears to never become like his parents, regarding them as "true evil", but he also doesn't resonate with being called a hero due to failing to save the people he loves. (he also calls himself selfish and says everything he does is for his own gain, which.. there is no way that's true, he doesnt want his efforts that fail to be failures To his loved ones. if they were efforts set only for himself, then if they don't go right it technically isn't him failing others. he needs therapy! and i'm sure this way of thinking doesnt stop him from being guilty anyway so really, just admit you care man we know you do)

his mama persona is so.. wanting to help out everyone as if a mother would, reasons being he didn't have that experience with his own mother and it's also a way to punish himself? because he can't Truly be that figure for anyone. it's like taking on a role you wanna be so badly even though you know it isn't feasible... he Knows it'll hurt when he can't live up to it! ugh i think he's doing the best he can and deserves the world

during the war (he was in his 2nd year) he was Constantly overseas. this was because he had influence at the school, along with rei who Also had major influence. (student council president and being a well known idol) and eichi needed them out of the way to orchestrate plans. dude they were like 17 and fixing international problems at different schools And doing idol work?? i'd die idk how they did it

rei also taught madara a lot with everything they needed to know to fix problems, make agreements, falsify passports, other illegal ways to get things done im sure. ritsu was supposed to be rei's successor but he was too sick to, so madara was his next choice. learned to pull strings from the best of the best!! madara is insane and he can and will do anything for the sake of a task, to help/protect the people he loves, etc.

rapid fire facts that are on the wiki but i'm saying because OUGH

he's so multi-skilled??? this man can do so Much. he can play piano, cello, and violin. can play in like every sport. is well practiced in FIGHTING. knows multiple languages fluently, english being one of them. and i'm gonna need him to stop being so hard on himself. cmon, you are literally not a monster i dont know how else to tell you this!

he doesnt let people get Too close to him because he doesnt want them to get hurt. he thinks everything he does is akin to destroying. he is incredibly affectionate and has no idea what personal space is. he lies for fun (part of his persona.) would, maybe has killed for people he cares about (he's definitely gotten in so many fights there's no way he hasnt. he is a revenge boy first and foremost) he hates religion because of his past with it, and he despises the idea of ignorance. he goes on monologues about humanity and how ignorance Will be its downfall. he doesn't like being compared to other things and has this thing where he hates being asked to do things that Anyone could.. he wants to be important, he is SO important. i adore him

if i got anything wrong feel free to throw a dart at me i know absolutely nothing about anything! i hope this was good :] thank you leo!!!

#madara mikejima #tw cults #good lord here we go!! i havent read double face stories yet so my knowledge is actually really fucking little!! #he makes me insane i want to hug him #enstars #leo 😼

[vibesfc]

love island thinkpiece that no one asked for: the ekin-george dilemma

george's behaviour was problematic regardless of whether ekin-su touched him or not simply because he continued to touch her after she asked him to stop. ekin saying she was too hot seemed to me like a fake excuse to leave the bed and evacuate an increasingly uncomfortable situation.

iirc ekin friendzoned him three times: in bed, on the terrace and at the recoupling when everyone was saying goodbye (and she probably did it off camera as well). she clearly wasn't interested in his advances, and the fact that she had to repeat herself shows that george didn't respect her boundaries. he took her rejection as an invitation to try and change her mind, rather than for what it was: a rejection. his actions were not okay; his persistence was not sweet or "cheeky", it was dangerous. george 100% knew that "we're just friends" = "no". like, this is not a novel strategy. she was clearly using the friendzone as a way to reject him with limited conflict/awkwardness.

besides, i don't think anything significant happened anyway because the producers would have exposed her if they had any evidence to support their very vague allusions (cf. tittygate, multiple pool boners, extensive footage of bits being done under the covers, ekin's balcony etc).

they (george, producers) are exploiting ekin's femme fatale persona for clout by acting coy and encouraging speculation. i'm certain that the reason they haven't definitively confirmed anything is because there isn't anything to confirm. just because a person is confident in their sexuality does not mean they are willing to have sex with whomever ffs.

her storyline with davide and jay – which she consented to – is not an acceptable reason to throw ekin-su under the bus. imo this is starkly different from the typical drama of islanders fighting or hooking up with one another. to pedal this narrative as a source of entertainment, when the situation is so ambiguous and ekin is so uncomfortable, is seriously unethical.

i understand that love island is a controversial show and would not exist without chaos/conflict, but a line does need to be drawn somewhere and the producers have overstepped. the amount of slut-shaming i've seen directed towards ekin-su is atrocious and undeserved (not that slut-shaming is ever deserved lol). if you're going to stir up rumours like this, at least give her a chance to speak as well.

sidenote, who exactly is the well-being officer on the island? they're obviously not very good at their job. love island is a psychological hellscape and, if they're going to use the contestants' misery for entertainment, they should at least have experts on hand to help them through the experience. it's ridiculous that psychologists arent consulted until after the series is over.

this is my first season watching love island. while i loved the show to begin with, and obviously remain hyper-fixated on it, i don't know if i can in good conscience continue to watch the programme. it's tricky because, eight seasons in, one can only assume that applicants understand what they're signing up for and have, therefore, implicitly permitted the public to pick their very person apart. yet, the level of distress seen in islanders is far greater than what they (or anybody) should be expected to handle.

as i've mentioned elsewhere, the lack of silliness and sincerity and true friendship (which was present in seasons passed) is depressing and draining. not to sound like a broken record, but there is a difference between dami, for example, receiving public judgement for his actions in casa (which he chose to pursue knowing the consequences) versus tasha being reminded again and again that 4.5 million people around the country (or however many viewers there are) do not like her.

likewise, ambushing ekin-su with these rumours and inviting public slander for a narrative she has no control over – and a situation we're not even sure took place – is out of order. the amount this non-event has been criticised, to the disadvantage of ekin-su and no one else, is unwarranted and unfair. surely there is a way for the producers to make the experience fun on both sides, for viewers and contestants. genuinely, my favourite moments of this series have been (in no particular order):

the boys "pranking" the girls with a fake female bombshell (davide)

danica teaching the islanders how to twerk

danica's resilience

gemma calling ekin over to scream about chocolate

gemma telling luca to concentrate while she's speaking

ekin putting makeup on luca

ekin crawling around the terrace

ekin's enemies to lovers arc with davide

jay counselling davide about his feelings for ekin

indiyah and ekin slyly helping the other girls with their hair and makeup in the background

all of indiyah and dami pre-casa amor

indiyah standing up for herself post-casa amor

indiyah's friendship with danica

heart-rate challenge

ikenna's twitter handler

memes

despite the drama that took place, not one item on this list required any great manipulation or falsehood by the producers (that i'm aware of, at least) and were imo the best parts of the show.

#love island #theres been a lot of heated debate on reddit re: ekin and george #which led me to write this #im not posting it there bc redditors are scary and mean #this ended up being way fucking longer than anticipanted #im probably making it too deep #like jacques i too blame adhd for my behaviour #*

[mrsman]

I'm not gonna be specific bc I just wanna say it but the fact that this woman is so vulnerable and open about her dating life and her experiences and how men treat her but fans still want to sit here and romanticize these relationships after she's long out of them and even some of the men publicly long for her after treating her badly like huh? We're all just ignoring the cheating, hiding and lying?? For what?? Romance?? It's not romantic for her to cut herself to the bone and fit into these tiny boxes to fit their lives only for them to pay her in dirt. Then she finally leaves and suddenly the fans and these men just can't believe she'd leave and act like that was her only chance at true love like fuxking excuse me? And some of her female friends too who she gets shipped with that leave clues for the fans after their friendships have already been dissolved it's giving clout chaser it's giving stop giving these fucking vampires attention this is terrible and shitty of them to do after already breaking her heart like be so fucking fr rn as a fan do you actually like this woman or do you just want to play with her like a doll as if she's not a human person

Like the career less loser who she wrote "love songs" about that are filled with real bleeding anxiety and fear and all the inspo she found for her "fictional" songs about heartbreak and begging for a crumb of attention and love and even on the most recent releases coming right out and saying this man didn't put her in his priority list to the end and running with her to avoid being seen like she's an embarrassing person to spend so much time with and now that they're over he makes a fucking post w references to her lyrics like how heartless can you be she left you she won't release the song everyone wants her to about you probably bc she doesn't want you to regret it or receive hate from her fans she's a nice fucking lady so nice and so sweet and so deserving of a real true love that puts her first and is proud of her and yea I'll say it like the one she has now bc excuse me it's night and day yet I still see stupid ass comments talking about "I miss her ex come back dad" like shut the fuck up you're a grown adult and you want this woman to turn back on a decision she obviously agonized over making they were together for 6 years do you think it didn't hurt her do you think she made that choice lightly do you think she wanted anyone else's input beside her own beating heart that told her it was time to go like once again this a woman who's been baring her soul for us making such gorgeous beautiful music that we relate to and allowing us in and to pay her dirt by ignoring her pain and her truth and the real desire there to be loved by someone who isn't afraid to give her what she needs that's crazy

And then today I saw a timeline of her and the teenager she dated and I was shocked bc I remember growing up and vaguely thinking they were cute but the way this man emotionally led her on for years and essentially called her the person who "he can always come back to be pushed and inspiration" like huh?? That's romantic??? The way he still obviously longs for her is cute?? After he cheated on her and never fully committed and let her suffer in silence and never said ily back except in a song like wait what?? It's totally fine and okay that he continually disrespects her existence as a woman with needs and desires that asked for the bare minimum and just acts like she was a home he'd always have the key to or like a dog waiting by the door basically an ex girlfriend who'd always have him back even if he couldn't get it right the first second third or fourth time if she hadn't put a stop to it like how can there be fans of this relationship almost a decade after it ended I've seen the videos I've seen the interactions she's such a kind human being and he's so grimy for the way he still feeds into these theories and probably his own feelings but couldn't ever commit to an actual relationship don't you think that hurts her to see don't you think she sits awake thinking what the fuck could she have done differently when the honest answer is nothing bc he's never going to grow up and he needs to keep it to himself and stop being a selfish asshole it's just crazy how low the standard is for these men who are famous

And don't get me started on that horrible witch and the other girl who is on thin ice in my eyes for always feeding the theories that she was in relationships with them when she's tried as politely as possible to emphasize that she is not bisexual or a lesbian if she was she'd be out and proud anyone who is a real fan and respects her and the words she says and the music she puts out would be able to read that and these delusional theories these women feed into drives me insane why would they do that to what was once a good friend of theirs?? Encouraging people to undermine her and her stance and the validity of her identity? When did that become okay? Stop calling her homophobic for not being what you wanted and stop giving that horrible model who was a horrible friend the time of day she's literally riding off the coattails of this insane theory while being safely in her stupid castle with her HUSBAND like give me a break it doesn't affect her at all

Meanwhile we have our girl out here fighting for her life she can't use social media anymore normally she can't make posts or like things without a million and one different analysis' and theories about what it means and people interpreting it however the voices in their head tells them to like don't you think she's tired of feeling separated from the general public and being unable to step outside or go online? And if she made a fake account it would be found immediately bc the fans are insane and they can't leave her be everything's become a clue and something to entertain us rather than just a normal person consuming media the way the rest of us do no she's apparently not allowed that privilege bc her music is too good and she's too pretty 😐

I'm not gonna name names or use tags bc I've seen how this goes I've seen the arguments I've seen everything that goes down in this fandom and I vibe with the good that comes from her and the way she connects with fans I love it makes my brain feel less abnormal bc she gets it most of her fans get it everything is connected there are no coincidences really I love that I love Mastermind as a concept as a song and as a part of who she is but the fans really put her in these boxes and play w her identity like an American girl doll and I refuse to fight anyone on this I just had to say it and get it off my chest bc shit I can't imagine why so many people have so little standards when it comes to men but don't put that on her she's thriving she's finally being put first and celebrated the way she should be and I pray she is truly happy bc she deserves it I grew up on her music I left the same time a lot of millennials did after this Era originally came about and I regret my opinions and choices and judgment I was wrong I would apologize if I'd ever said anything that she could've known or heard but she's a big name and luckily it's unlikely but I'm a fan and I appreciate everything she has given from her heart and soul and God will bless her path that's what I want and I hope the desires of her heart are for her and that's it that's all

[evereinefaust]

. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 ࿐ྂ

Pairing: Austria (Roderich Edelstein) X afab!Reader

Sypnosis: A fateful second chance was all she needs in order to end up with him.

Word Count: 644

Sometimes, it confuses you. Some people say that we deserve a second chance. Some people say we don't.

        Sometimes         You Need A         Second Chance,         Because You         Weren't Quite         Ready For         The First

That's what happened to you. You loved a man, and that man loved you back. But because you wanted your relationship with him to the next level, you devoted your life to loving him more than anything else in the world. And that's your mistake. Sometimes, you think that you don't deserve a second chance.

        Second chances are rare,         use your first chance wisely

And that's that. You are ashamed of yourself because of your mistake. Your parents and friends always comfort you, saying that people always make mistakes. But you weren't convinced. You can't move on. Your memories were haunting you, and that's what prevented you to move on.

        My worse enemy is my memory

Sometimes, you wanted to remove that certain memory from your brain. You wished that you weren't that stupid to love a man that you don't deserve. It's a pain in your heart, and it drives you insane. But it never happened. Guess what? The light in your darkness finally came. You were very thankful that he came to your life, that he didn't leave your side. He is always there for you, to comfort you. You are just stupid enough not to know this.

        Friendship is not about whom you have known the longest,         It is about who came and never left your side

It's true. You met this pianist during your childhood days, he is your childhood best friend. But one day, his family left to return to their home country, Austria. You were just lucky enough that you met him again in high school. He knows your current condition and is always there to comfort you, saying that it's okay to cry all your pain out.

        Rain falls because the clouds can no longer handle the weight         Tears fall because the heart can no longer handle the pain

He's your dearest friend. Your very bestfriend. Your other friends sometimes tease you and Roderich, saying that the two of you are a perfect couple. But you denied it because you love someone else and he is only a friend. Of course, it hurts you. Not because your boyfriend hurt you, but because you didn't realize that Roderich was the one. God gave him to you, but your eyes were blinded by the light that you stumbled in the darkness.

         Red strings helps you find the other end

He is the other end of your red stings. The famous red strings of fate, believe by almost all. You wanted to love someone and be loved again. You wanted to experience happiness once again. You needed a second chance. Your prayers were already granted. Roderich Edelstein is the one. He is your second chance. He is the one. He loved you from the start, and he will never stop loving you.

        I love you then and I love you still         I adore you now and I always will

You are grateful that you had a second chance. It's the best thing that happened to you, to experience a second chance and be will Roderich forever. 'Till death do the two of you apart...

        If I had my life to live again,         I'd find you sooner

#fanfic #fanfiction #alternate universe #oneshot #one shot #reader insert #x reader #fluff #drabble #aph #aph hetalia #hetalia #hetalia austria #aph austria

[mira-blue]

little tidbits from dana & matt's interview!

matt and rebecca's cats casually strolling on their owners several times

working from home has been difficult for both matt and dana

matt and dana didn't have much of a writing experience before their shows and got good by trial and error

they both also intended to have an audience with a large age range and are very glad that that's the case

discussion about the lack of a 'middle ground' between kid cartoons and adult cartoons

REPRESENTATION MATTERS!!!

'they're both cute!' -matt on edric & emira

edric and emira had too many scenes with half lidded eyes and the owl crew had to tone that down LMAO

sasha too has many scenes with half lidded eyes and this means that a character is 2 cool 4 school 😎

dana once again states that eda is one of her favourite character to write

rebecca sugar & noelle stevenson shoutout for paving the way!

MARCY DISCUSSION!!!

matt delaying marcy's introduction was very risky because if they didn't get a second season we would have never met her!

'you'll look at season 2 and be like, oh cool, that's marcy's season!' -matt

'if you don't like this character the show will fall apart' -matt on marcy

cue dana's cat walking on her

marcy & sasha's voice actors both were potentially anne's

matt was the marcy of his trio friend group

the majority of the amphibia crew relates to marcy

amphibia is wish-fulfillment for marcy👀

dana's a huge pokemon fan

'flex those unique pokemon muscles' -dana

dana was once tracing a pokemon character, then realized what she was doing and cried

SASHA DISCUSSION!!

the amphibia trio are based on a trio matt was a part of, and the sasha-esque person was not a bad person

sasha has specific motivations and probably has reasons that led her to be the way she is (why am i gasping, i already knew that)

matt tells an interesting story of encountering a group of friends with a very obvious leader when he was seven, and how he found that strange and terrifying

portraying the girls' friendship is one of the shows biggest priorities

AMITY DISCUSSION!!!

(so. many. CATS!! /pos)

stRAIGHT A - *gunshots*

dana doesn't believe that every villain needs to be redeemed

'not every sad backstory means that you deserve a second chance' -dana

dana relates to amity the least

she relates to the core trio (luz, eda, & king) a lot more

dana wasn't expecting amity to become as huge as she is with the fans, nor did she expect the way fans would to react to lilith once it was revealed she cursed eda (she finds it funny how quickly everyone kept switching)

we should be waiting to see lilith's journey after the season one finale, which should be obvious but i feel like some lilith haters could use the reminder :] /g

she loves how passionate & involved people feel in regards to the owl house

'we kill for the feedback' damn okay matt

matt loves reading why people think sasha let go at the end of reunion (pspspsps i have a character study that talks about that right here:

'is she feeling jealous? is she feeling angry? is she feeling spiteful? is she feeling, you know, benevolent?...it's all these things!' -matt on why sasha let go

sasha letting go was always gonna be there

can i just digress and say i love how supportive matt and dana are of each other's shows?

there is something petty about sasha letting go, though

anything like the usage of Lean on Me is probably never gonna happen again in amphibia, as that only happened because the amphibia crew had spare budget

dana tried to license a song for the season 2 finale (my reaction was exactly like matt's) but it didn't work out

the studio has apparently tightened its hold because covid :/

the song dana wanted was from a band called the binoculars, but it has nothing to do with the scene thematically

the boiling isles is free of homophobia & transphobia

LMAO DANA SHADING DISNEY what a queen

as stated before, it wasn't matt's intention to write marcy as neurodivergent but he's glad people relate to her!

dana, while not intending to write luz as adhd, DID intend to write luz as neurodivergent!

'sometimes, fandom is right' -dana

matt thinks we've got great ideas guys!

some predictions for both shows have come really close to things that will actually happen

rebecca keeps the codes for both shows on her table at all times as cheat sheets

the owl house alphabet was created by dana and a friend of hers in highschool so they could pass notes

matt is very grateful that people like the shows enough to wait long periods for new content (duh, i ain't going nowhere)

'i'm worried when we eventually have to do the season 2 trailer because i'm like, everything is a spoiler' - dana (!!!)

we talk about the iconic 'There really isn't.' tweet

matt & dana talk about what they're proudest of during their run as showrunners

matt said that they are building momentum towards the finale, True Colors (if you're planning to watch the show, you should do it before True Colors airs)

aaand the much awaited owl house sneak peak:

NEW MAIN TITLE Y'ALL GET READY TO LOSE YOUR MINDS!

'i have to not get in trouble with disney just yet' dana will fight disney soon confirmed /j

THAT'S A WRAP! everyone say thank you rebecca, dana, and matt <3!

#feel free to reblog this took me so long #amphibia #amphibia spoilers #anne boonchuy #marcy wu #sasha waybright #the owl house #matt & dana interview #dana terrace #matt braly #it's rebecca rose #amity blight #luz noceda #edalyn clawthorne #owl house season 2 #amphibia season 2

[literatikoo]

Lane Kim deserved better

I mentioned a couple of weeks ago that I would only write Lane Kim meta when I am very very angry because I need to be powered by spite and petty energy to unravel exactly how much of a disservice this show was to Lane and by extension any Asian kid with a similar life. And, well, it's happening now, so buckle up kids, this is going to be a loooong ride because I have a lot to say.

Before we start on the negative aspects, the show got a lot of things about Lane right, which is why I care so much about her character. Yes, ASP obviously didn't know how to write a POC experience and it's seen in the way some very harmful stereotypes were propagated (the tiger mom trope, Mrs Kim's religious beliefs, the depiction of the Kim extended family etc) but at the same time Lane was beautifully written as a character, unlike her plot which left much to be desired. Lane Kim was an Asian girl with rock n roll dreams who had an extremely fraught relationship with her mother and had to fight for even a semblance of independence. And I hate to say it but a lot of daughters of Asian households are forced to hide a part of themselves from their families, so Lane's story was authentic.

Not only was Lane amazing as an individual, she was also a great friend. She was the only one who was really in Rory's corner; she never judged her and supported all of Rory's relationships (my favourite example of this is when she barely tolerated Jess in S2/3 and then did a complete 180 like 5 episodes later, all because Rory decided to finally accept she liked him). Lane never pointed out what Rory was doing wrong not because she was afraid of doing so but because the two of them had been friends for years and Lane believed that Rory would figure it out one day. Lane shows this unconditional kindness not only to Rory but to everyone. She takes in her Korean cousin and teaches her to have fun even when she's afraid that Mrs Kim has replaced her, she lets Gil be in the band because she empathises with him, she takes care of the band and prevents it from breaking up multiple times. And these are only a few examples of Lane being the kindest character on GG.

One of the best things in Gilmore Girls is that the most unproblematic, amazing guy is given to Lane. Dave Rygalski is the best love interest on the show hands down (Sorry to my boy Jess but Dave was LEAGUES ahead of him at 17) and Lane definitely deserved someone like that. Their story was adorable and I would have loved for them to be endgame. However, what grates me is that when I see people talking about Lane "deserving better," it's usually about Dave vs Zach. When Lane actually deserved better as a WHOLE and not only in terms of love interests. I always thought it made more sense for her to end up alone at the end of the og series. Because Lane was a person who craved independence and she was not going to get that while tied to some guy (even if that guy is boyfriend extraordinaire, Dave Rygalski). It's even worse when we see that Lane is the only female character on the show to be treated this way. Rory rejects marriage for her career while Lane ends up with marriage as her storyline. Lorelai and Luke get back together but their relationship is still left open ended, though arguably it would've made more sense if they got married when Lane and Zach did. Paris gets into Harvard Medical school and gets a great relationship, similarly Sookie gets the family she wanted and continues to be amazing at her job. But Lane... god Lane is the only one without an open ending, without any space for speculation of where her life might lead her. Not only did they marry her off, they also gave her a terrible first time and twins, effectively locking her to Stars Hollow. The show even cut down all hope of her being a rock n roll mom as one of her S7 storylines is choosing the kids over going on tour with Zach. She doesn't get to be her own person for more than ONE season; she's stuck with being a daughter and then a wife and then a mother.

Something else that angers me about Lane's storyline is that we never really get to see how badly her relationship with her mom affects her. Don't get me wrong, I adore Mrs Kim's redemption arc and I think it was beautifully juxtaposed to Lorelai and Rory's crumbling relationship, but having a mother like that is hard. Not only did Lane have to hide 90% of her personality from Mrs Kim but she also lived with the fact that one day she might have to choose between her dreams and her mother. In the end, Mrs Kim makes that choice for her and deals with it by kicking Lane out in S4, and yet we never really see how that negatively affects Lane. Hell, Jess acts like a broody teen for two seasons, Rory wastes six months of her life away at the DAR and they both come out of it successfully. Lane gets kicked out, figures out her own living conditions, gets a job, works insanely hard for her band and... ends up having to give her dreams up completely.

Lane and Paris shared a lot of similarities too, even if they both had different friendships with Rory. They both came from terrible families and looked to Lorelai as a mother figure, they both cared deeply for Rory, and they were both incredibly passionate about their careers. Paris made calendars and flashcards and went crazy studying for both pre med and pre law. Lane was a walking, talking music encyclopaedia, she bought CDs obsessively and organised them by genre under her floorboards, she taught herself to play the drums and then found a band to play for. And yet... only Paris becomes successful in the end, whereas Lane takes over Kim's antiques. Lane was still a musician in AYITL and she can be rock n roll even with kids but this is all hypothetical and we never see it on the show.

There is a lot of terrible, lazy writing on the show and a lot of characters get ruined because of it but with Lane, her character stays the same, they just ruin everything else for her. I think she'll be an amazing mom and will probably make her best out of doing music casually. But the writers also took something so special and destroyed it just because Lane stopped being as important to the plot as she was in seasons 1-3. Lane and Rory drifting a little after Rory leaves for Yale makes perfect sense, that's just how relationships are, always changing. And yet as Lane's importance to Rory decreased so did her importance to the writers.

Lane wasn't the kind of character that needed character development or a redeeming character arc- she was never a bad person and nothing about her had to be fixed, unlike Jess or even Paris. All she really needed was for her dreams to come true because for the first 4 seasons her dreams were the biggest fixture of her personality. Like how Jess needed to overcome his trauma and Rory needed to figure out where she fit in and Paris needed to become a girlboss, Lane needed to realise her dreams because that's where her arc was leading her. But it just didn't happen. Instead, Lane becomes 2-dimensional; a large part of her screentime is taken up by Zach problems, her dreams fall flat and she becomes tied to Stars Hollow for the rest of her life. Not to mention we see less of Lane in favour of Logan and the dickhead posse.

This is not me hating on all the other characters I've mentioned in this meta, I'm just pointing out the lack of respect the writers have for Lane in comparison to all these other people who fulfilled the role they were made for. Why would you write Lane to have all these dreams and make her struggle so hard for 4 seasons just to smash them to pieces? And why is it that one of the only POC characters on this show is treated like this?

And you can't tell me the writers didn't know what they were doing, not when this is a direct quote from Lane in S7:

"It was such a small window -- a peephole, really. For years, I was this repressed kid, and then there was the briefest of windows. And then -- slam. All of a sudden, I'm this overburdened mother. I barely got to do it, Zach. I barely got the chance to be a person."

#gilmore girls #gilmore girls meta #lane kim #lane kim meta #mrs kim #rory gilmore #jess mariano #lorelai gilmore #paris geller #lane x dave #amy sherman palladino #anti lane x zach #anti zach van gerbig #in the end paris and rory got a lot of their opportunities because they are rich privileged white women #and if lane got opportunities like that she would’ve grown wildly successful #i always saw paris as a raging lesbian #and yet!! her and doyle's divorce meant less to me than zach and lane's

[sepublic]

           God seeing Marcy in that tank, floating and healing, unconscious… A part of me is relieved as hell, but;

           A part of me is still in utter despair. It still hurts to watch; Not only because of what happened, the emotional and mental and PHYSICAL anguish she went through… But also, even if she’s recovering, well, she still WENT through that to begin with, she shouldn’t be in this kind of state, EVER! She’s literally a child and Marcy has gone through unimaginable trauma of multiple forms, and it shouldn’t have happened at all!

           She’s not fully safe yet, she’s still by herself, still wounded… Hurting, scarred already- GOD, can you imagine Marcy handling a scar for the rest of her life, of her most traumatic experience!? Dreaming, possibly having nightmares, not even fully aware or realizing that she’s alive- She might think she’s dead, or is in too lucid of a coma-like state to even realize or remember, too lucid to be relieved and given hope. She looks so lonely in there, so forgotten...! So small, but also weirdly peaceful and tranquil, like a dead body resting... It’s bittersweet and leaves me conflict and confused like her. Blissfully unaware... of the pain but also that she’s safe and still alive, so she’s trapped in that terror in a sense. The void- She must FEEL dead and I hate it. That this is the rest from life she wanted all along...

           And I’m sad because… Marcy was so afraid of being left behind. Sasha and Anne didn’t even KNOW she was going to leave them, can you believe that?! How they’d have reacted if Marcy told them, but she didn’t trust them, didn’t feel safe enough to admit this first at least? They had no idea that they were about to lose her too, they would’ve found out on Anne’s BIRTHDAY… Marcy was so afraid of being left out, behind, alone from the others, and she kind of was on that day; Anne and Sasha had fun (well mostly Sasha) as they forgot about Marcy, who had to grapple with the worst news of her life all by herself.

          Watch Sasha and Anne’s antics, knowing that somewhere out there, Marcy is having a borderline panic attack and feels so incredibly isolated and detached, desperate even- It’s the end of the world for her, while for Sasha and Anne, it’s just goofy antics; The worst thing for Anne is being late to her own birthday, but at least there will be more birthdays, and more times to hang out with her friends. But Marcy…

           Now, Marcy is left alone, once again! Because Sasha and Anne… They have company. They have people, REAL friends. And they’ll no doubt reunite and put in the work to stop Andrias. Sasha is going to learn and heal from her mistakes, but Marcy… She’s probably going to float in that tank, all by herself, taken advantage of by Andrias’ master, for who knows how long. Marcy’s going to miss out on so much, the chance to grow and develop and be with her friends against Andrias, because now she’s trapped with them…

           Even though Marcy lived… Just. The WAY the show handled it. The complete and utter breakdown. The despair, the terror, the regret… The genuine belief that she was dead, the shock from Marcy and everyone else. It all felt real, and still does, in the moment, that you keep forgetting she lives- Like you’re actually there, reliving the moment as if it were new, each time and feeling the dread alongside everyone else. For a moment, Marcy DID die- And they’ll never forget that. She went through the experience of believing, of feeling she was dead, and for all intents and purposes she was. Marcy shouldn’t have EVER been dead…

          We would’ve had to wait who knows HOW long before we got reassurance that Marcy lived, had True Colors aired properly. Even if Marcy lives, that trauma… She’ll NEVER be the same after this, the innocent girl she was, it didn’t grow into someone else- It felt more like it was brutally murdered to make room for another, more mature yet scarred Marcy.

           Marcy may not have literally died in True Colors… But it was the death of her innocence. Her spirit, her hope, and dreams and fantasy… The fun, the carefree attitude that every kid is owed; And the trust from her friends, the trust towards others, the belief in herself. Marcy may not be completely dead, but a part of her DID die, irreparably I feel… And I’m just afraid that Marcy is going to return rather late in Season 3, and be forced to catch up on all this growth she missed out, on the time Sasha and Anne had together. Still left out…

           But, hopefully they’ll stick with her, to let Marcy know they’re never leaving her behind. But DAMN it sucks that Marcy might not get this full development on-screen, and it just feels so unfair and descriptive of her life, always overlooked and ignored, given the short end of the stick… Barely making through with the bare minimum of a victory, and just being grateful for that! I swear, I NEED to see Season 3 fully delve into Marcy’s recovery from her wound, let her realize she’s alive and still has a chance, fully develop her hope, rekindle friendships with Sasha and Marcy, actual time to do so, at her own pace (mostly)…

           Just… let Marcy be here. Let her participate like the rest of the girls, and not be forgotten and sidelined again. NOBODY deserves this, least of all a literal child like her… She just wanted to avoid loneliness. She could’ve learned her lesson without this sort of trauma, so all of it, all of Marcy’s suffering- It’s just pointless and needlessly cruel, and accomplishes nothing but to break her. And she had NO ONE to listen to her, no one who actually cared… So dammit, I want to see Marcy reconcile and vent and admit to Sasha and Anne, and have them listen and forgive her, and let Marcy know that she’s HEARD, all right! I just need some full emotional closure for her, some on-screen, canonical development, inarguably there and described, and not just alluded to or set up in an off-screen epilogue.

           And I need Marcy to know that it’s all right. That as she floats, she’s going to be dreaming a lot, and… A lot of her dreams will be nightmares. She won’t wake up for a while, she’ll be trapped in her fears, reliving trauma and isolation and despair, over and over again, not realizing that there’s an end or even that there was ever anything else to begin with. But you’ll wake up soon, Mar-Mar, and it’ll be all right… It wasn’t just a bad dream, a lot of it DID happen- But the rest, Sasha and Anne will fight to make sure it never occurs, no more pain. No more suffering and anguish… They know what happened and they will FIGHT for you this time! They’re here to protect and defend, and you can trust them, rely on them, to come for you in the end… They’ll come back, I promise.

           I want to see it- The hope, the glimmer and realization, the new life and invigoration and joy in her eyes, when Marcy first realizes that Anne and the others are coming back for her. I want to see it. And I want her to experience and appreciate this joy by herself, to be left alone with it, without Andrias or his master or anyone else there to ruin it.

           ...Not too long ago, she was so HAPPY singing with Anne and Sasha. She really thought it’d all be okay and she was looking forward to it, even! I see her in that tank and I want to hold her, cherish her, cuddle and comfort Marcy, and tell her it’s gonna be alright, it’s okay, you’re safe now- And we understand. We still love and forgive you.

#amphibia #amphibia spoilers #spoilers #amphibia marcy #marcy wu #angst #meta

[alreadyblondenow]

I loved you first, but you’re not the last

“....You’re special so it requires extra effort. Happy Valentines and happy first day of being a couple,”

Pairing: Mark Lee x female!reader

Genre: Angst, SMUT, fluff, childhood best friends to lovers

WC: 4,588k

Warnings: Fake dating, break up,swearing, mentions or other idol, reader x Taeyong in the end, Taeyong as Mark’s brother, unprotected sex, virginity loss, a lot of making out, mentions of making out, touching, a small amount of dirty talking, oral sex (female receiving), overstimulation

A/N: NOT PROOFREAD. I’ll fix it once I get my internet connection back. Gosh I hope this posts. Part of Request Party

It was in the middle of the night when you received a call that did not just woke you up, but also woke your whole being. Body, mind and soul.

“You’re back?” crankily you sat up from bed, scratching your heavy eyes and about to get out of bed because the person on the other line is right outside your house, waiting for you.

He has been away and gone for too long because of college... and you should be excited as you go downstairs to meet him, but you know why he’s here and it’s no good news. Let’s face it, this night will not end nice.

“Here goes nothing,” you murmured. Wrapping yourself with your thick jacket before you finally step outside.

And the moment you opened the door, snow was falling and you didn’t miss how the snow landed peacefully on Mark’s eyelashes. Eyes looking straight to you, those sad eyes that can’t hide the pain that he’s holding. A pain that you caused.

You wanted to finally reunite first with a hug, but he got ahead of you and took your chance to show him how much you missed him.

“How could you?” he started, eyes still locked on yours. “I thought we were going to wait and do it right- how could you date my brother while I was away?”

Even you find it cruel. What you did to Mark was cruel, selfish, and unforgivable. And truth be told, you don’t have the right words now. You wanted to explain of course, but you’re scared it might break him even more. “I love your brother,” you said softly. Not even brave enough to look him in the eye because you feel bad.

“You loved me first,” he bite back. And you can’t help but be weak in front of him and cry. Usually whenever you cry, he will walk towards you and remind you how much you mean to him. But you guess not tonight, maybe you don’t deserve love tonight.

“You left me, remember?” you dried your tears and tried being brave even just for a short period. Just until you have the guts to walk away.

“Whatever. It’s not yet too late. Choose me. Marry me. Let me make you happy,”

He finally said his true purpose tonight. This was his last chance and the only to win you back. But even though he has never been more honest in his whole life except tonight, he feels like not even telling you his feelings can bring you back to him. Mark was so frustrated that he has tears in his eyes already that you wanted to dry so bad. But if you really want him to respect the relationship you have with his brother, then this is the perfect time.

“I may have loved you first, but your brother is the last man I’ll love. I’m sorry Mark,”

And just as you finish saying those hurtful words, you finally have the bravery to turn your back on him and ignore his shouting that you’re sure your parents and neighbors heard. This is you throwing a decade of good friendship because of unrequited love.

FOUR YEARS AGO

The day before Valentines day, you don’t know what’s up with your mood or with you in general, because you’ve been so envy with the people around you, couples to be exact. As you admire happy couples in school who celebrates Valentines as early as now, you can’t help but to imagine someone.... someone that will give you flowers, chocolates... kisses, or whatever you’ll accept in whole heartedly.

Valentines is like Christmas, it’s a day of giving and receiving. But that only applies if you have someone special whom you can spend the day with and exchange shiny, glittery, and sparkling Valentine cards with.

“I can be your fake boyfriend, come on it will be fun,” he raises his seagull eyebrows and smirked. Come to think of it, it’s not a bad idea. You’ve been best friends even before kindergarten, you watch each other grow and went through puberty together until the next thing you know, you’re printing college applications together in your room because his printer broke down.

“Let’s not go to college without having the experience of high school love... you know, let’s have fun before we graduate with flying colors. Let’s go to parties, participate in Valentine-gram tomorrow, go to prom together. What do you say?” he added.

“But everything’s fake? What’s the point of fake dating if we already look like were dating ever since we started being friends?” You whine and flop on your bed, Mark did the same thing.

“Don’t think about it too much, just say yes,” for a moment you both just stared at the ceiling, wondering what could go wrong if you started fake dating. “Anyway, you don’t have a choice. I need to get home and answer these- Bye, you’re my girlfriend now!”

“W-what? Mark-“

And just before you could reason out with him, he’s gone with his college applications and you’re left with your thoughts and excitement. You don’t know why but Mark’s crazy idea made your heart jump, it’s like a good electricity that made you look for your art materials and spend the whole evening making your fake boyfriend a blue shiny, glittery, and sparkling Valentine card.

Even if the motive was fake, the effort was real and it felt good and right at that very moment.

But little did you know that his idea of fake dating was only his way to not shock you when he finally confess his feelings to you.

That’s right, your best friend is in love with you.

If she wears blue tomorrow I will confess to her. He tells himself as he stares in his ceiling, feeling the same excitement and electricity in his heart. Trying so hard to sleep but he kept on thinking about you and can’t help but feel the excitement for tomorrow again.

“You and Y/n started dating? Since when?” Mark’s mother exclaimed happily while driving. Looking at his son admire the roses he got you from the flower shop downtown.

“We’re just starting mom. Thanks for helping me pick these up by the way,”

“Oh there she is! Wearing blue! Oh I never realized how you two grew such good looking kids until now,”

Mark breathed in and let it out with a smile, thankful that you wore his favorite color, because he can’t continue to hide his feelings for you. Maybe you and him are really bound to happen.

As you wave goodbye to Mrs. Lee with a bright smile, there you see Mark carrying a unique bouquet of roses and your eyes immediately went big and sparkled because. Not to mention your heart beats so hard and fast because he looked so handsome even in his casual clothes.

“Wow- I’m speechless, these are beautiful. Where did you get these?” you accept the bouquet as he hands it to you with a smile. Engraving the look of your face in his mind and heart, swearing to himself that from now on he will make you happy like this everyday.

“It’s a secret. You’re special so it requires extra effort. Happy Valentines and happy first day of being a couple,” he said and planted a kiss on your forehead. Something so natural for you and him, but today is different. Nonetheless, you believe that today will be a beautiful and eventful day.

In the see of people wearing red and white in your school’s hallway, you and Mark are happy wearing blue. Such a sad color but you wearing it makes him the happiest guy today. Everywhere you look has a dash of red and pink, hearts are hanged here and there and almost everyone has red roses on their hand... except you.

Because you’re holding a bouquet of rainbow roses.

This year’s Valentines wasn’t like any other Valentine’s you usually have. Today you have Mark.

You have Mark to hold your hand while you walk on the school’s hallway. You have Mark to look at you so lovingly that your heart melts whenever you catch him looking. You have Mark to take you out on a date after school and take cute photos in a photo booth. You have Mark to share a big drink with two straws.

And most especially, you have Mark to kiss you under the dark sky full of stars in front of your house.

His lips were soft as expected. And the way his tongue swipes on your lip in the most subtle way just makes you want him to kiss more. He smiled in between kissing when you pulled him closer and kiss him more when he was about to pull away. And oh! You did not miss the way he softly moans, such music to your ears but sad to say you can only hear them tonight.

“Did you liked my Valentine card? I left it in your locker,”

You finally pulled away and surprised him. Wiping away the spit from your mouth, you wiped Mark’s as well. He only smiled to you and you wish he would stop doing it because you’re growing a little crush on him already.

“It’s full of glitters, it’s blue and it has watermelons. Of course I love it” he said then did it again, melted your heart with that damn handsome smile.

“Good,” you said softly, fixing his hoodie and finally giving him a bear hug that he deserves. “I don’t want this night to end,” you finally admitted it.

“Then let’s not end it,”

“Wait, you’re not faking anymore aren’t you-“

And just like that Mark cut you off with a deep kiss. Nothing like how he kissed you earlier. This time he was holding you tight that you’re almost out if breath and you feel like he’s about to crush you anytime. But the way he kissed you... it’s his way of confessing his love to you.

On the following days, everything changed between you and Mark. Though it’s clear that what you feel for him is only just a crush now and he knows it, still the guy is hopeful that you will love him like how he loves you.

Mark is the perfect definition of consistent. He showed you how he feels for you each day, and each day he became better than the day before, sweeter and bolder. He was putting everything on the line for you, showering you the love he has always kept in him. That’s why, in a matter of months you finally made it official with him and you can’t wait what the future has in store for the both of you.

“What do you love about me?” you asked out of nowhere while he was in the middle of playing his guitar. It wasn’t a hard question, but it made him stop and think for a second.

“I love how you give me constant reasons to love you even more each day,” the first line was enough, but Mark has more to say. “The way you kiss my cheek in the most friendly way but it always meant something to me, how you accepted me to be your friend and now boyfriend. I love how you love me, because being loved back by you is something so special that only us can understand”

What he said moved you of course. You didn’t know that he loves you deeply even before you started the fake dating thing. And knowing that Mark is just crazy and madly in love with you, you can’t help but wish that you are too. For now all you can do is accept his love, and give back however you can. You love him of course, but you can’t keep up with his love yet.

Days passed by and your relationship grew sweeter. More sweet words were exchanged and more kisses were given. Way more. Until you find yourselves making out whenever you two are alone.

“Aw!” you express your pain when Mark accidentally bit your lip. Something so sexy but it hurt and it made you both stop what you’re doing.

“Oops. Sorry, I got carried away” he says and took a look at your lips. “You’re fine right?”

“Mhmm” You answered, but just before he was about to start kissing you again, you stopped him by pulling away. “And it’s getting late, I think you should go home,”

“But I want to stay for more,” he said with a sly smile. Caressing your shoulders and soothing your back. If course you did not miss what he was talking about for more. You and Mark are young, and being new to this relationship thing just makes you both want to explore and feed each other’s curiosity.

“When I’m ready. I promise it will be worth the wait, for now it’s getting late and you need to go home... And work with some homework,” you gave him a final kiss and thankfully he did not pry.

The relationship you have with Mark was nothing like the friendship you used to have. The friendship was still there, of course, but friends don’t kiss your neck while you’re busy reading a book or slam you to the nearest wall and kiss you wildly. Friends don’t taste your favorite ice cream flavor through your tongue in the middle of a Netflix movie, and friends don’t get affected when they see you in your thin shirt and panties only whenever they give you a surprise visit.

“It’s the weekend, why are you here?” You whine as you try to go back to sleep. Clinging to your pillow and thick blanket but your boyfriend is currently losing his mind. Nonetheless, he remained a gentleman and covered your exposed leg and butt, covering you completely and keeping you warm. “Come to bed with me. Cuddle with me instead”

The young man’s eyes brightened and quickly joined you in bed. Swinging his arm around your waist from behind and nuzzling your neck to tickle you.

“I got into my dream college,” he whispered excitedly beside your ears which made you quickly turn to him and hug him.

“That’s why you’re here! Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t realized” you planted kisses on his cheek the ones he loved receiving other than your slow and deep ones. “You used to talk about this ever since we were just kids. Ugh, I’m so proud of you”

“Promise to support me no matter what?” This time it’s him who went closer and planted kisses on your face. Of course you said yes, it has been his dream, but now that you knew you’ll miss him everyday and you know that the image of him walking away from you at the airport will truly hurt you, so you can’t help but fake it.

You rolled on top of him and his eyes immediately went big, wondering why and how are you like this. You have never been this bold and confident even in your wildest times, it’s like he’s seeing a totally different side of you and he loves it.

“Want to claim your early graduation gift?” you completely surprised him and started kissing his neck, while Mark is actually enjoying the moment by caressing your ass cheeks and teasing you by tugging your panties. You wish you have the same level of confidence with Mark, because you well know that between the two of you he is the one experienced with sexual activities, so now you try your best.

“Mmm” a loud pop surrounds your room as Mark sucks your nipples through your thin shirt. Taking turns with your left boob and right boob until your shirt is partly wet because of him and he can finally see your nipples. The sight of it gave him the feeling like no other. Of course this is not his first time seeing boobs, but this is different because it’s you.

The mere sight of your boobs just made him lose his mind and not to mention hard in no time. You watch him roll his head back while you slowly grind of top of him with a ruined shirt, looking so hot than ever so he quickly switched places with you. Putting you underneath him, looking down on you with hungry and lustful eyes.

“Do you wanna touch my boobs?” You asked him so innocently,reaching for his hand that’s placed on your waist. You put your hand and his hand inside your shirt, slowly lifting the wet shirt just above your chest to expose your boobs to him.

“I wish you were my first,” he said and immediately kissing your right boob while his hand kneads the other, pinching you or teasing you, or whatever he just wanted to hear something from you. And when he stopped making your nipples swollen, Mark just kept on kissing you softly and saying ‘i love yous’ over and over again. making you smile through his lips and soft touches, it is as if he’s taking away all your shyness and making you comfortable with the situation. The situation where your boobs are expose to him, your legs spread wide and Mark is in between your legs, grinding his clothed cock on your ruined and wet panties.

You were just kissing passionately but now you felt his hands hooked on your panties and the next thing you know he’s pulling it down without breaking the kiss until it reaches your thigh and eventually remove it but the shyness crept in again, making you close your legs and bite your lips in hesitation.

“Can I? Open your legs?” He asks, kissing your neck and calming you through the way he kisses you and touch you. And when he felt that you’re ready, he tried opening your legs again and this time you let him. Letting him place his body in between your legs, smiling through the kiss as if he’s telling you ‘good job’.

Mark spread kisses around your body, kissing every inch of your being, earning a giggle from you and with that he’s happy you’re not nervous anymore.

And when Mark pull away to discard his clothes, and release his cock, you were speechless when you saw it that you removed your own ruined shirt just to be fair ask him to get back in between your legs this instant.

“Lets do this right,” he said and immediately placed a finger on your wet slit that took your breath away. Up and down, you feel his finger nothing else, and when the moment comes and Mark put a finger in, your hand reached for his hand and tried to stop him because the pleasure was too much. But your handsome boyfriend was just smiling at you, smirking because you looked so ruined right now all you can do is smile back at him. And when he insert two fingers, he kissed you deeply and caught every moan you let out, every cry of his name, every groan, or whine.

And the next thing you know you’re closing your legs as you shiver and curl your body. Trying to get away from Mark because you’re sensitive already but your boyfriend is not stopping.

“First of many,” he says and stopped to pull out his fingers. But he is not yet done. He only gave you a few seconds to catch your breath and went back kneeling in between your legs again.

“Are you going to fuck me now?” you asked with ragged breaths and tired expression.

Mark did not answer you verbally, but he did physically. Licking your pussy juices and spreading your pussy lips while his eyes are completely locked on yours.

You said ‘no’, but you didn’t mean it and the moment his tongue swipes on your cunt you grabbed hold on your headboard and hold on for your dear life. Clenching and unclenching as Mark eats you out, trying so hard to close your legs but you can’t until your second orgasm drowned you quickly and all you can do is breathe in and out heavily.

“I hate you” you said but you’re clinging to Mark and sharing your warmth to him.

“I love you,” he said and intertwined his fingers with his, kissing your knuckles before he place both your hands above your head. You voluntarily spread your legs wider for him, and with his free hand he lines his cock finally.

“I didn’t know you’re big,”

What you said made him smirk and proved your discovery even more by pulling out entirely and slamming his cock back in your wet hole. “Now you know,” he said small grunts and went in deeper. He knew what he’s doing to you is too much pleasure because it’s your first time and also he can tell by the way you hold on to his hand.

“Planning to crush my hand?” he let out a cut giggle like he isn’t fucking you deep right now. How can he do that? Be insanely cute while doing something filthy to you.

“Y/n, I’m close can I go faster?” and you can only nod.

Fucking you faster and harder than earlier, you watch Mark become someone sinful when he started focusing on his own release, kissing your boobs while he fucks you, give your ass a tight squeeze, lick your neck like you’re a fucking ice cream and whisper dirty words or word that make you shy that you didn’t know you would love hearing. Like,

“Let me fuck you again,”

“You like it deep huh?”

“Y/n, you’re worth wait, you’re mine forever”

“This is the last pussy I’ll fuck,”

And in the end he pulled out and jerked in front of you, letting his cum fall on your lower abdomen and watch his cum drip to your sheets. It’s a shame that he can’t cum inside you, it would have felt great.

“Fucking shit- that sex was great,”

He rests his head on top of your boobs, but went back to kissing you again on the lips. Apologizing for his mess, aplogizing for his words and saying ‘i love you’ over and over again.

That morning, you stayed naked with Mark in bed for a few hours just talking and laughing, flirting and kissing. It felt great having a huge progress with your relationship, especially that it’s Mark who took your virginity.

“Hey, you okay?” he was talking about your pussy because even though he didn’t went hard earlier, he did fucked you a little bit harder knowing that it’s your first time. “I meant what I said earlier. Please be my last, I don’t want to give my love to anyone but you. It’s too early to talk about marriage but, I know it’s you. I’ll love you better each day, I promise”

Comfort, warmth and safety. That’s what you felt hearing those beautiful words from him that you became speechless and crashed your lips to him.

His promise was kept every day until you both finished high school together, enjoy the summer before he leaves and make unforgettable memories as many as you can.

But knowing that he’s going away to follow his dreams and fulfil his goals, Mark worried too much about long distance relationship and how it never worked.

“Are we really together now? I’m not dreaming right?”

Your sleep was disturbed when Mark called you in the middle of the night. Today, you taught him how to bake and had a couple of rounds during Netflix and chill, so to be honest you’re really exhausted and tired.

“Mark, we kiss, we date, we have sex almost everyday. Yes baby, we’re together for almost four months already. Now can we please go back to sleep-“

“Go down open your door. I’m outside”

And the moment you opened the door for him, you gave him a ‘shh’ sign, telling him that your parents are already asleep. You came closer to him for a kiss, and told him, “it’s real. I’m real. Can you please promise me to stop overthinking, you’re making me worry,”

He didn’t answer you but lowered his head. You knew he’s sorry and he’s just doing this for you,

“I love you, Mark. I’m yours forever,” you said and kissed him again. Deeply this time, to the point that it put you both in the mood and the next thing you know Mark is fucking you while he’s covering your mouth with his hand.

When Mark left you for college your relationship went downhill and you’re both getting hurt already. Fighting is part of the relationship, yes, but the fight you have with Mark almost everyday was becoming the reason why you want to distance yourself from him. You feel caged with how he love you, you feel like he’s strangling you with all these rules you need to follow to maintain trust in your relationship but nothing is working.

Until he finally realized what he’s doing to you.

So during his vacation, he visited you and you were so excited to the core that you welcomed him with a tight hug and the biggest smile. Only to find out that he wanted to break up.

But

“It’s just until we finish college. Let’s wait and do it right. I don’t want to fight for you while hurting you at the same time. Please understand. I’m not breaking up because I don’t love you. This time off will heal us both,”

The breakup did you no good. You were sad every day and to be honest you would rather want him to nag you than miss him like this and you can believe that between the two of you, he’s the one doing great in life. It makes you want to believe that he doesn’t love you anymore. Like the man you fell in love to, wasn’t there anymore.

“Still crazy about my stupid brother huh? Come here and help feed my fishes,”

His brother, Lee Taeyong, disturbed you and your ugly thoughts while you finish the drink their mom gave you during one of your visits.

“Well, college was good to you. I see you’re back and finally opening a bakeshop downtown” he hands you the fish food as you wait for him to talk and feed the fishes generously.

“I’m very much excited to open my bakery. Want to make cookies later instead of being broken hearted?”

And as days, weeks, and months pass by, not only Lee Taeyong making you forget about Mark, he also healed your heart and won it fair and square.

It started how he makes your heart flutter whenever he holds your hand while teaching you how to bake, how praises you and tell you that you look beautiful everyday, how he makes his kitchen your own little world during closing time and you’re sitting on the kitchen counter with Taeyong in between your legs and taking your breath away with a heated kiss.

When you and taeyong started dating, you experienced true love. You didn’t want to hurt Mark but what you have with Taeyong is real and you had to hide this from him for years and years and years, until you finally graduated in college.

And Tayong proposed to you. It was the only time you couldn’t hide your relationship from Mark anymore because Taeyong was the one who confessed to him.

*this is the part where you read the first part again JEJEHEH

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