anoldgreekman

[anoldgreekman]

I was listening to a news podcast on the way to work about the collapse of the apartment building in Florida, and for the longest time in front of me there was a car with a decal sticker that read “No worries. God has got it covered” and maybe it was the fact that someone was literally describing how people were probably stuck between 2 feet of fucking concrete for the past 4 days, but it felt so fucking tone deaf. How blind to the world do you have to be to think that because you love Jesus, God is going to protect lil tiny you from everything? This is definitely me blowing it out of proportion, but I hate the damn cherry-picking that goes on with what the Christian God is responsible for and what they aren’t.

[anoldgreekman]

Anyone else want a collab between a cop show where the cops do all the crime solving, a lawyer show where the lawyers do all the crime solving, and a teen drama where the kids do all the crime solving? Just have the entire thing be about them trying to avoid each other and have all the characters think they’re the main character in the show

#someone should write this #tvandfilm

[anoldgreekman]

Is it weird that the only time I can stomach serial killer shows like Criminal Minds is after a nice long shift in retail? Yes? No? Hmmmm

#retail #criminal minds #serial killer #am i crazy

[anoldgreekman]

Retail Story #?: someone literally got jumped at work today. She was standing in line at customer service when a bunch of teenage girls cornered her, dumped a Dutch bros on her, tried to pepper spray her and shoved her to the ground all while SCREAMING at the top of their lungs. Apparently the women’s daughter goes to high school with the girls and she got sexually assaulted at that school and the girls were the ones who told everyone about the rape. The mother stood up for her daughter and called the girls out, which led to them jumping her today. The whole thing is so shitty I can’t believe it. People suck.

#people suck #retail struggles #retail story

[anoldgreekman]

GUYS Netflix has a randomize button?! How did I never know this?

#netflix #random #netflix shows

[anoldgreekman]

I work in a part of my grocery store that requires you to check out before leaving and it includes both the Plan B and the pregnancy test inside. The amount of times I’ve gotten someone buying both a pregnancy test and Plan B at the same time is too many. I’ve had to gently inform multiple people that the pill only works for up to three days after the incident, and a pregnancy test won’t show anything until 14 days after so I’d recommend double checking the results in about 2 weeks just in case. It sucks because the people I talk to are genuinely shocked when they hear how the pill functions. Sex education needs to freaking get better

#sex education #retail #pregnancy

[anoldgreekman]

Ok but tell me something. Who the hell decided that lasers would be the best weapon to put in LIPSTICKS? Like do you know what lipstick is made out of? WAX. Do you know what lasers are? HOT. You use it once and hot red wax is running down your hand, ruining your outfit, and then dripping onto the floor, leaving a very obvious trail of evidence. And don’t come at me with the whole “the lipstick is fake” argument, as the whole reason the techs are disguising weapons as household shit is so that the weapons blend in. Who the hell carries around plastic lipstick? They may as well have not use the lipstick disguise at the point.

#daily rant #lipstick #tv props

[anoldgreekman]

[Spoilers for The One- Netflix] Watching The One and was so excited to see a bi women represented well only for her end up in a love triangle and emotionally cheating on her girlfriend WITH HER GIRLFRIENDS BROTHER. Fml. I get that the whole thing is that relationships are messy, but the premise for the show is so creative that you’d think they’d come up with something actually unique for the bisexual.

#the one netflix #bisexual #lgbt

[anoldgreekman]

I JUST FOUND OUT THAT BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY WAS PRODUCED BY DISNEY. They really did own my entire childhood, didn’t they

#bill nye the science guy #disney

[anoldgreekman]

I work apparel in a grocery store so our stock is very limited. Every once in a while we get a parent shopping for clothes for their toddler/baby but we don’t have their size in their specified gender colors. The amount of times I’ve pointed to a pink jacket or a dinosaur onesie and had the parent go “No that color isn’t right, I can’t put them in that” and leave empty handed is enough to make me want to bang my head against the color coded table

[anoldgreekman]

Does anyone else feel like they’d make a really good sales rep simply because of the sheer amount of practice of trying to convince family members your Christmas gift to them is actually good and not just something you grabbed at Target last minute?

#christmas struggles #christmas #gift giving #merry fucking christmas

[anoldgreekman]

Today I got hit in the face with a mustard packet. T’was a good day.

[anoldgreekman]

Today was a good work day. I protected an older woman from a chronic throat clearer (she was afraid she had covid, and I found out later that it was just asthma) and got called a hero, helped a woman and her husband find good skincare products for helping to prevent ache from constant mask use because their daughter was in the NICU, and saved another woman from almost spending $19 on two nail polishes when she could’ve spent 5 bucks. 

#today was a good day

[anoldgreekman]

This is the one time in my life that I’ll allow the Queen of England to die. Like right now with the shitstorm of hate raining down on the future king as all these memories of Princess Diana are being resurfaced, that timing would be impeccable. Do I want her to die? No. But if she had to die, now would be a very hilarious time to do so.   

#lady diana #lady di #queen of england #queen elizabeth ii #prince charles #the royal family #the crown #the crown season 4 #the crown season four

[anoldgreekman]

[anoldgreekman]

Retail Story #3

On Sunday, I was working in cosmetics, which along with a bunch of stuff usually includes emergency contraception. On this particular day a woman came up to me and was like “So you’ve probably gotten this like a million times today, so sorry, but any chance you have any more plan B?” Frankly I had no idea we were out so I told her I’d call someone and ask. She was a very nice young lady so I assured her, knowing millennials, that she was in fact the first person to ask me about Plan B, so it hadn’t bothered me in the slightest. She let out an ecstatic “really!?” which is a reaction I found funny so I started to make a joke referencing one of those “congratulations! You’re the hundredth customer who’s come through this line!” except modified to be the like the first customer, you know? Alright-ish joke, 4/10. But during this whole exchange I was trying to call my manager who knows stock and just as I said “congratulations!” She picked up and my focus immediately changed, like I literally just stopped the joke dead in it’s tracks. I did not have ANY self awareness of what that sounded like to this customer. Being incredibly confused, her immediate reaction was “um, no?” And sort of gestured at where the plan B would’ve been. Realizing my mistake, I managed to finish up the phone call before I burst out laughing and explained to her the rest of the joke, as well as apologizing through my laughter, which made her laugh as well. The reaction is what I seriously find hilarious as this is one of those times where you can be sure that it is a genuine reaction to something they’ve never fucking heard before, and hers was to be like “I don’t accept your congratulations.”

#retail story #retail #retail is fun sometimes #well i found this funny #funny

[anoldgreekman]

Anyone else remember that weird time in the early 2000s where shows started doing recaps of previous episodes, but no one knew how to edit them properly so we ended up being forced to watch like a full 3 minutes of shit that we didn’t need because they just put full on scenes in there like they’re an honors student who was just asked to write about why they should be accepted into Harvard? 

#nostalgia #early 2000s #can you hear them typing