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#*a thought I often have‚ but still this scene has hit pretty hard*
katiexpunk · 5 months
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Diner Girl | Pairing Joel Miller X Fem!Reader
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Summary:  You frequent your local dinner pretty often, not just because you love their pancakes with extra syrup, but because your best friend Sydney is a waitress there. You've heard her talk about her hot boss, Joel, every now and then but you've never had the pleasure of meeting him; that was until one morning, after getting unexpectedly laid off, you decided to drown your feels in syrup and love from your bestie. Joel offers you a job, and he shows you the ropes in more ways than one. Rating: 18+ Minors DNI Word count: ~7.3K Warnings: Pining, flirting, hard core tension, age gap (unspecified, reader is 30), 2000s style (needs a TW lol), 2000s texting, Joel is a little rough/bossy, Joel is actually readers boss, unprotected p in v (wrap it up, folks, or don't idk you're not gonna listen to me anyways), no creampie (a katiexpunk first, weird, I know), rough blow job, oral (m and female receiving) pet names, cum swallowing, praise kink, inappropriate use of syrup, one tit slap, Joel rips readers uniform off of her, readers former boss is an asshole, reader gets fired from her job, eating/references to food, did I already say flirting. Joel and reader fuck on a table in the diner. References to a health scares (for readers coworker). A bit of a dom/sub dynamic. Fluff. Porn with plot. Joel calls reader slut twice. Hilary Duff/A Cinderella Story gets mentioned, as does Jennifer Coolidge yelling for more salmon. Authors Note: The fact that I'm posting this doesn't feel real. This idea has been in my brain for so long, and I am happy and relieved to have it out in the world. Special thank you to @endlessthxxghts for holding my balls, brainstorming with me, and beta'ing this. And another thank you to @sydneyinacoma, my inspiration for readers bestie -- thank you for being my slutty, smutty, sister and for saving my ass with the first blowjob scene; I owe you one. ILY both. And to @hier--soir, Jessie, your beautiful way of storytelling inspires me and I often find myself HWJWTS (How Would Jessie Write This Smut). Masterlist | Read on AO3 | Notifications
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November 2004 
The blaring sound of your alarm disrupts your slumber, and you jolt awake with a sense of urgency. Shit. You’re gonna be late. Again. 
You stumble through your routine. You splash cold water on your face in an attempt to remove the pillow marks left behind on your cheek and smear on a mixture of lotion and face oil the saleswoman swears will make you look like you’re in your 20s again. You didn’t have the heart to tell her that that was only a year ago. You can see why she would have thought you were older as you look at your reflection in the mirror and the dim light from your tiny 1950s bathroom illuminates the bags under your eyes. 
God, you’re tired. Truthfully, you’ve been tired for months now; no amount of caffeine can seem to make up for your lack of sleep due to the demands of finishing up your Master’s and your boss who keeps you late at work what seems like every night now. 
You hastily get dressed and attempt to gather your thoughts. As you step outside into the cool November morning air, you bristle at the wind cooling the still-damp hairs that frame your face. You unlock the door to your beater and slip the keys into the engine. A sinking feeling settles in the pit of your stomach when a soft click, click, click, click noise reverberates through the air; the stubborn engine refusing to turn over. 
Shit. Not again. No!
Frustration mounts with each futile attempt to bring the engine to life. You slam your palms against the cool leather of your steering wheel, a long sigh escapes your lungs and your forehead meets the top of the wheel in defeat. 
You reach into your purse for your phone and quickly compose a message to your boss, explaining the situation. "Car won't start. Trying to figure it out. Going to be late. Sorry." With a sigh, you hit send, hoping for a sympathetic response.
The minutes crawl by as you anxiously await a reply. The familiar chime of your phone signals a message, and you eagerly check it. However, the words that flash across the screen only deepen your frustration: "This is unacceptable. You’ve already been warned twice. Don’t bother coming in, and consider this your termination."
The shock of the message hits you like a ton of bricks. 
Sure, you had been late a few times in the past year, but you figured your staying late almost every night would make up for it. Maybe if he paid a little more you could afford to fix your piece of shit car and you wouldn’t be late in the first place. 
Your eyes sting with disbelief, and your hands tremble as you clutch the phone. Anger and desperation dance the waltz in your mind as you fight to hold back the tears threatening to spill over.
You sit in your silent car, the quiet sounds of morning make you feel frozen in time, unsure of what to do or where to go from here.
You look back down at your phone again and type out a quick message to your best friend Sydney.
“U working this am?” before you can even put the phone down, it’s chirping to life with her response. 
“Hi babes! I am. R u?” her response reads. 
You don’t want to give her the full details over text – too much to type out – and instead, you settle on a short response. 
“No. Long story. Coming in 2 c u.”  
“Kk! C u soon <3” 
Your day was quite possibly off to the shittiest start ever, but you know there are three remedies to that situation. 
Your bestie, pancakes, and syrup. 
Lots and lots of fucking syrup. 
++++
The early morning sunlight spills through the diner's large windows, casting a warm glow on the worn checkered tiles. The aroma of sizzling bacon and freshly brewed coffee envelops the air, creating a comforting ambiance that feels like a hug. The clinking of cutlery against plates and the low hum of conversations provide a soothing soundtrack to the chaos of your morning. 
Your usual booth is taken, so you settle for a seat at the bar. The stool is a little wobbly, but you have a nice view of the bustling kitchen and the seats next to you are empty. 
You watch Sydney pour a coffee refill for the older couple at the end of the bar before heading over to you. As she approaches, her infectious smile illuminates the space. Her apron, adorned with a patchwork of food stains and coffee spills, hints at the countless meals she’s already served this morning. 
"Morning, sunshine! You’re here early, you miss me?” she greets, grabbing a mug from the counter behind her before placing it in front of you and pouring you a steaming cup of coffee. 
You let out a little chuckle at her remark, knowing you just saw her last night.
You grab the mug in front of you with both hands, wishing you could shrink yourself and jump into the hot liquid like a hot tub; your bones cold from your long walk to the diner. Stupid car.
"No really, what’s up? Everything okay?” she asks, a hint of concern behind her words. 
“Not really. My car wouldn’t start this morning again, and John fired me after I told him I was gonna be late,” you respond, feeling the warmth of your frustration beginning to build in your chest once more. 
“What an asshole,” Sydney responds, “I’m sorry that happened, babe. He’s a real piece of work, you’re better off without him,” she continues. 
“I guess so. But I need a job, Syd. I don’t know what I’m gonna do now,” you respond, defeated. Your cheeks begin to heat and you think you might actually cry this time. You move the menu out in front of you on the counter to the side, and Sydney picks it up and removes the pen from behind her ear. 
“I could talk to Joel,” she offers, scribbling your order down on her notepad. You don’t have to tell her, she already knows what this situation calls for – pancakes with a lot of fucking syrup. 
“Joel?” you ask, leaning over the counter and looking both ways before you whisper to her, “as in the hot boss you won’t shut up about, Joel?” 
She lets out a little chuckle and you see a little twinkle of bashfulness in her eyes. 
“Yes, my ridiculously hot, mostly unreadable, but hot, boss Joel,” she replies. “Martha quit last week, something about wanting to spend more time with her grandkids, so we’re down a waitress.” 
You look at her face, pondering her offer as if you really have another option at the moment. 
“He’s here this morning, he’s in the back doing paperwork – I can go grab him and have him talk to you if ya want,” she says, nodding to the woman who just sat down at the bar, giving her a soft be right there hun. 
“Plus, it’ll be so fun to work together!” she says, her voice more energetic this time, preparing to go back into customer service mode. 
“I – yeah, alright, yes, I’ll talk to him,” you agree. 
She does a little jump and says “YAY!” and then gives you a big smile before pouncing off to greet her next customer. Where does she find the energy? 
As you wait for your emotional pancakes to arrive, you cradle your mug, the warmth seeping into your chilled skin, while you gaze through the window into the kitchen. Amidst the orchestrated dance of chefs and waitstaff, there stands a figure that looks like he doesn’t belong in the greasy kitchen of a diner – a towering presence, broad and resolute. His flannel shirt clings to the sculpted contours of his muscles and the determined furrow of his brow accentuates the intensity he’s directing to the clipboard in his hand. 
That’s him. That’s gotta be the ridiculously hot boss. That’s gotta be Joel, right? You feel a little tickle in your belly at the thought. 
You try not to stare too much, not wanting to be obvious, but like passing a car wreck on the freeway, you can’t seem to look away. You smile at the way he bites the cap of the pen in his mouth, only dropping it on occasion to make little notes or checkmarks. As you look at him doing his work, his eyes flutter up and meet yours. And in that brief moment, you feel a connection. The corners of his lips curl into a friendly smile as he stares back at you briefly, before once again dropping his gaze to the papers in front of him. Sydney did say he was unreadable; now you see why. 
Before you can process further, Sydney returns with your stack of pancakes and places them in front of you. “Thanks, can I have some syr–,” but before you can continue, she’s placing the container of the sweet liquid in front of you with a wink.
As you dive into your comfort food, savoring each bite, the door to the kitchen swings open, and Joel emerges. Tall and confident, he approaches your seat, a hint of curiosity in his eyes. Of course, he would come to talk to you now, right as you have a giant bite of pancake shoved into your mouth like an animal. The cherry on top of your already shit day.
"Sydney's been raving about you," he admits, a friendly smirk on his face. "Say’s you’re lookin’ for some work,” his voice is low and even, and his eyes briefly scan over the patrons before coming back to land on your face. For as hot as Sydney has been describing him as over the past few months, she forgot to mention how fucking sexy he sounds. 
You stare back at him, gulping down the remaining pancake in your mouth. 
Joel's eyes are trained on your face. What he really wanted to say was Sydney’s been raving about you, but she didn’t tell me how pretty you are. That was all the more apparent to him now that he sees you up close. 
“We’re down a waitress, and we could use someone with your taste in breakfast and impeccable timing, if you’re interested?” he says, watching you fidget with the napkin in your lap. 
“I – yes, yes I am very interested. I’ve never been a waitress, but I have great attention to detail and I’m sure I could pick it up quickly with the right guidance,” you say, straightening your posture, attempting to look more composed than he has you feeling right now. 
“Well great, we’ll have you trained up in no time,” he says, his gaze lingers on your features for a beat longer than expected before he swivels on his heels, heading back to the kitchen. However, after a few steps, he abruptly pauses, pivoting back around with a thoughtful expression, as if there’s more he wants to share.  
“Oops, my bad, sweetheart. Almost forgot my manners. I’m Joel, by the way. This is my diner,” he says, gesturing with one hand as if to show the space to you like you were seeing it for the first time, before offering his large hand toward you. You meet it with your own, giving him a firm shake while sharing your name. 
"Can you start tomorrow?" he asks, and you respond with a satisfied "mhmm," sealing the deal with a wink from Joel. "Great – be here around seven in the morning then, and we’ll get cha all trained up" he adds with a grin, one that teeters the line between professional and flirtatious. 
And just like that, in the midst of your syrup-drenched, emotionally charged morning you let out your first real smile of the day. 
So there were four remedies to your situation. 
Your bestie, pancakes, syrup, and Joel. 
You finish your remaining pancake, letting your mind wander off, secretly hoping Joel will be showing you the ropes in more ways than one.  
++++
The next morning, you get to the diner just as the sun is starting to rise, and you can't help but draw a parallel to Hilary Duff in A Cinderella Story, except now you’re the Diner Girl. 
While you may not be gliding around on gaudy rollerskates, and Jennifer Coolidge isn't screaming at you “MORE SALMON! We need more Salmon!” there's an undeniable charm to the whole scenario that makes you chuckle. The uniform Sydney handed you on your way out may not be the stuff of fairytale gowns, but the fabric that clings to your skin is a tangible reminder that you're stepping into a different narrative today, a narrative where you’re employed and your boss isn’t a total jerk. 
As you step into the diner, the familiar calms your nerves a bit. Joel, seemingly in tune with your arrival, glances up from behind the counter and shoots you a playful wink. Does he wink at all his employees? 
"Morning, sunshine! Ready for your grand debut?" he teases, flashing a bright smile coupled with an adorable set of dimples. You manage a shy smile in response, feeling nervous once again, but it has nothing to do with learning your new job and all to do with the beautiful man in front of you that you’ll be close to the entire day. 
Joel wastes no time guiding you through the diner's rhythm. With each task, he effortlessly blends instructions with charming banter, making the learning process feel less like work and more like a shared secret between the two of you.
"Here's where the magic happens," he says, gesturing to the row of gleaming coffee machines. "And trust me, making a perfect cup is an art; takes a lot of love."
“Aren’t these like super-fast automatic coffee brewers? You just load the beans and water and hit start?” 
"Alright, smartass," he retorts, a playful glint in his eyes, "Yeah, they are, but you gotta press that button with love, baby. That's what makes it good." 
Your laughter harmonizes with his, and you catch the infectious mirth in his expression – one hand on his hip, the other casually resting on the counter. Your eyes trace the veins on his forearms, distinctly visible beneath the rolled-up sleeves, and you can't help but admire the effortless confidence he exudes. 
“Do it with love. I understand,” you respond. 
“Good girl,” he responds. “Alright, next up – silverware rollin’, ya ready?” he asks.
"As ready as I'll ever be," you reply, a playful smile dancing on your lips, as you follow him to the back of the kitchen to grab a tray of freshly washed flatware. Returning to the dining room, he leads you to an empty booth tucked away from the prying eyes of coworkers, giving you the first taste of true solitude with him all morning.
"Now, watch and learn," he says, demonstrating a silverware roll that rivals any seasoned server. "The key is in the wrist action. It's all about finesse."
You mimic his movements, chuckling when your first attempt doesn't quite match his polished technique. He leans in a little closer, his warmth and encouragement almost palpable.
"See, you've got the basics down. But let me show you a little trick," he says, guiding your hand with his own. The close proximity sends a delicious shiver down your spine, and you can't help but revel in the extra attention to detail in his guidance. As he imparts his expertise, the thought of him taking charge and instructing you in other ways goes straight to your core. 
“You’re a natural,” Joel says, responding to your growing stack of rolled silverware. 
"You like taking orders?" he inquires, his gaze intense as he places the second-to-last rolled set in the pile you both created, and you complete your own. The implication behind his words hits you, and your eyes widen with surprise.
"Do I what?" you ask, a hint of uncertainty in your voice, unsure if your mind has ventured too far into the realm of innuendo to fully grasp his meaning.
"Taking orders – you seem like you'd be good at it," he says, pausing deliberately, well aware that he's causing a stir within you.
"You know, from customers?" he adds with a smirk, putting you out of your misery. 
“Oh. Oh – uh, well, I’m not sure, I’ve never tried it,” you respond. 
“First time for everything, darlin’. We can practice. I’ll be the customer, and you can take my order.” 
He flashes you a charming smile, making it hard to resist. "Alright," you agree with a shy grin, readying your notepad. You start “Good morning, Sir! Can I get you starte–” 
"Now, sweetheart, we've gotta do this right – stand up now, take my order properly," he interrupts, a playful tone in his voice. You shoot him a teasing side-eye, and he smirks, attempting to hide it by bringing his hand to his beard.
You rise and straighten your apron, and turn to face him at the table. 
“Good morning, Sir –” you begin again, “what can I get started for you?” 
"I'll have the classic bacon and eggs, toast on the side, and a steaming cup of your finest brew. Oh, and a side of your million-dollar smile, please."
You laugh at the last part, realizing this is exactly the kind of practice you need. "Got it, one bacon and eggs, toast, coffee, and a million-dollar smile," you repeat, jotting it down.
Joel nods approvingly. "You're a quick learner. Now, let's spice it up a bit. What if I want my eggs sunny-side-up, the toast lightly buttered, and the coffee extra strong?"
You take a moment to absorb the details, determined not to miss anything. "Sunny-side-up eggs, lightly buttered toast, and extra strong coffee," you recite confidently.
Joel grins. "Not bad, darlin’ – you’re a good listener.” 
“Maybe you’re just a good teacher,” you playfully retort. 
You don’t see it, but Joel palms himself beneath the denim of his jeans, attempting to adjust from the growing lack of space in them. 
As the morning rolls into the afternoon, you finish out the rest of your shift at the diner and make the walk back home.
As you lay in bed, you try to rationalize all of your flirting with Joel. 
He’s just nice. A Southern gentleman. He’s probably like this with all of his employees.
Unbeknownst to you, Joel lies in his own bed, also attempting to rationalize all of his flirting with you. He knows it’s wrong, but that doesn’t stop him from taking his heavy cock in hand to the thought of you that night. 
++++
After nearly a month of seamlessly navigating the diner routine, you've become a fixture in the cozy ambiance. The playful banter between you and Joel has escalated to shameless flirting – a subtle touch from a passed laminated menu, an intentionally clumsy moment with the cash register as an excuse to get a little closer, and the unmistakable sensation of his gaze lingering on you as you lean over to wipe down the booths. 
You even find yourself yelling out “Corner!” less than you should, hoping it might lead you to accidentally bump into him. 
It's not exactly backbreaking labor, though it can take a toll on you physically. But you find yourself enjoying it—the thrill of pushing through a lengthy shift, the rush that accompanies swift movements and juggling various tasks during the bustling hours, the familiar faces of regulars who now greet you by name, and the bonus of spending extra time with Sydney. 
For now, it's fulfilling enough. However, the more moments you share with Joel, the more it dawns on you that, at least when it comes to him, "enough" might never quite be sufficient.
++++
You normally work M-F, during the morning shift, and you’re grateful for the extra time on the weekends. You’re starting to feel like you might not actually need that facial oil now that you’re getting adequate rest. Take that, Mary Kay. 
One Saturday night, as you’re sitting on your couch watching Kill Bill, your phone buzzes with an unfamiliar number, and curiosity pulls you in. Joel’s husky voice on the line tells you who it is, but he introduces himself anyway.
“Hey, darlin’ – it’s Joel. Listen, uh, I know it’s your day off but I was wondering if you might be able to come in to work tonight?” he asks. 
Without pausing to let you respond, he lays it on thick, making a persuasive attempt to nudge you into saying yes, "The other servers are all tied up, and Suzanne had to call out, something about Mike not feeling right tonight, tight chest and all, so I told her to make sure he gets checked out."
"Oh no, that's awful. Yes, yes, of course, Joel. I'll be there in 15," you reply, hearing a sigh of relief on the other end.
"See you soon," he says.
"Oh? You're coming in, too?" you ask, trying not to sound overly excited.
"Well, someone's gotta make the food, right?" A little chuckle carries through the phone.
You remember it now; he had shared with you during that first day that working in the kitchen at night was one of the reasons he decided to take over owning the diner, his decision in part was fueled by his love of cooking. “Helps me remember why I started doing this in the first place," he had said. You were listening, but you were also distracted by him fidgeting with his coffee cup, watching him make small circles around the rim of it. 
++++
As the night descends, the diner transforms. The hustle of the day gives way to an intimate, dimly lit ambiance. Joel, donned in his chef's coat, greets you with a sly grin, "Well, look who's gracing the night shift. It's just you and me tonight, darlin'."
"Think we can handle it?" you respond, not really talking about the dinner rush, and he knows it. 
The air crackles with sexual tension as you and Joel maneuver through the shift. The need between you two is palpable; a desire only one thing could satiate, a hunger no amount of breakfast food could resolve.
The hours tick by, and the tile inside is illuminated by the soft glow of the neon sign outside. With the last order served, you both lean against the counter, a comfortable silence enveloping you. 
Joel breaks it with a casual remark, "Hungry?" 
"Starving,” you respond a playful edge to your voice, biting your lip. Joel’s eyes go dark as he stares at your plump flesh. 
You are hungry, but not for food.
++++
 Joel guides you to the prep station for a crash course on chicken and waffles. 
“Now, I know you’re a pancake kinda girl, but trust me darlin’ when I say these chicken and waffles will make you fall in love,” he says. Yeah, they just might. 
Joel, sleeves rolled up and a chef's jacket in hand, hands it over with a grin that hints at more than just a cooking lesson. The oversized jacket drapes over you as he gives a quick once-over. He chuckles, “you look cute like this, sweetheart,” he says before he heads to the fridge for supplies.
Returning with a bunch of ingredients, he starts showing you the ropes of making waffle batter. "You like to cook?” he asks, pouring flour into a bowl. His hands move with ease, adding baking powder, a pinch of salt, and a dash of sugar. You crack the eggs into the mix, and he throws in some vanilla extract, giving the batter a fragrant twist.
“I mean, I don’t not like to cook, but I can’t say I’m very good at it. I think I’m better with instruction,” you answer. You notice his gaze deepen, going darker almost, as he hands you a whisk. “Mix it up then. Give it your all,” he says, and you start blending. 
As you stir the batter, you sense Joel subtly adjusting his position until he's right behind you. He towers over you from behind. His arms gently encircle your body, and his backside hovers just an inch away from yours. He’s so close you can feel the warmth radiating from his body. "The secret," he murmurs in a low, almost whispered tone near your ear, "is to whisk it just enough, not too much. The air bubbles make it fluffy." His voice carries a blend of guidance and desire. 
His hand moves up to sweep your hair away from your neck, causing your mixing to slow as his fingertips graze the sensitive skin. Goosebumps erupt across your entire body, and he presses his lips to the soft skin behind your ear. 
“Joel,” you whimper, tilting your head to the side, giving him more access to your neck. 
“Keep mixin’ darlin,” he commands. You try, but the distraction of him on you makes you forget the simple action altogether. 
You close the gap between your bodies and take a small step back so your backside is firmly pressed against him. You let out a gasp as you feel the thick shape of him on your ass. He continues to nip at your neck, grazing his teeth along the sensitive skin there. You grab the counter in a poor attempt to steady yourself, and press into him harder, and he responds pinning your hips to the counter until his growing cock is all the more noticeable. 
“Fuck, darlin’,” he lets out a little hiss. “Can’t tell you how long I’ve wanted to get you alone like this – haven’t been able to get it out of my head.” A soft moan escapes you, and in the blink of an eye, his hands find your hips. Before you can react, he swiftly turns you around to face him.
“You like being told what to do, baby? I’ll tell you what to do, but I’m not gonna tell you twice,” Joel says as his large palm comes up to hold the column of your throat, his thumb just under your jaw, tilting you up to face him. 
“So if I tell you to get on your knees, you’re gonna do it,” he says, voice low. “If I tell you to look at me, you’re gonna do it,” he continues, “and if I tell you to swallow, you’re gonna do it like the perfect little slut I know you are,” he says, dipping his face lower to you. You wonder if he can feel your pulse quickening under his hand, caught in a lusty daze fueled by hot breath and the sight of his blown pupils. 
“Tell me you understand,” he commands, not really questioning. 
“Yes - yeah, I understand,” you say, tightening your grip on his forearm, feeling the strength of his muscles still grasping you, pulling you closer to him. 
You think for a moment he might kiss you, his lips barely an inch from yours, but he doesn’t. 
“Good girl,” he praises, “since I know you’re so good at practicing, let’s do it again,” he suggests, releasing his grip on you. 
“Get on your fucking knees, baby.” 
You fall to your knees and feel the hard, cold tile against your bare calves. You position yourself beneath him and fold your hands in your lap, waiting for him to give you further instructions. He reaches down and brings his pointer finger down to lift your chin up to face him. He runs his thumb over your lips. 
“So pretty like this, baby.” He thinks you're pretty. 
As he releases you, you take that as permission and reach out to undo the buckle of his belt. You fumble with the cool metal momentarily, until it’s completely unbuckled before you begin to work with the zipper on his pants. You tug both his pants and his underwear down just below his hips, and his thick length springs to attention. 
Your breath hitches in your throat at the size of him. He’s big. His cock is already at full attention, red and weeping. Your mouth waters at the sight of it.  You look up at him, silently asking for permission to touch him, and he nods. “All yours’” he says, and your hand comes to wrap around the base of him. The thought of all of him being yours stirs something low in your belly. 
Before you can put him in your mouth, he grabs your wrist to pull you back up to your feet. 
“Too many clothes, sweetheart. Need to see those fuckin’ tits,” he growls, tearing your uniform off, almost bare save for your bra. You’re gonna need a new one. His eyes are glued to your chest, admiring the red bra you’ve been hiding under your uniform.
“As much as I like the way this looks on, I’d like it a helluva lot better off,” he says while hastily unclasping your bra, letting it fall to the kitchen floor. Your nipples harden in the cool air, entrancing Joel. “Gorgeous fuckin’ tits,” swatting your left one, in awe of the way it bounced on impact. 
“Back on your knees,” ordering you once again. You obey without hesitation, almost automatically. 
You stroke along his length, feeling the silky warmth of his skin, the heat, and the thick veins that add texture to each pass of your palm. You pause at the top of him and let out a little squeeze, until a small bead of precum forms at the tip. You lap it up, and Joel lets out a groan and his hands fall to grab the back of your neck. 
“Keep that mouth wide open for me, baby.” I’ll do anything you want as long as you call me baby, you reply in your head. 
You part your lips and tease your tongue around and then start sucking on the tip, slowly taking more in until you’re sucking on the full head of his cock and your tongue is whirling around it. Joel’s grip on the back of your neck tightens, and he gently cants his hips forward, urging you to take more of him.
You’re barely halfway down and the back of his cock is already on your throat. You start bobbing your head up and down, and Joel mutters a little curse under his breath and bites down on his lip. 
“Such a good girl f’me, takin’ this cock down your sweet little throat,” you moan around him, the sound reverberating against him, “yeah, this what you wanted, hmm? Needed your throat fucked like a slut?” 
Your thighs clench together, a syrupy mess of your own slick smears on your skin, and his filthy words add to the roaring ache in your cunt. This doesn’t go unnoticed by Joel as you notice him stiffen just a little more. How is that even possible?
You pick up your pace, pushing yourself to take more of him. He thrusts shallow but firmly, meeting your movements along his shaft. 
“Tha’s it baby, just like that…” his groans are lecherous, coupled with the profane sounds of you gagging on his cock. You’d listen to that on a loop if you could. 
He tightens his grip on your hair and pulls you off him. There will be plenty of opportunities for him to fill your mouth up, but right now, he has other priorities. He does take an extra moment to watch you wipe the saliva and precum from your mouth with the back of your hand. It’s a vulgar sight and he commits it to memory. 
He helps you to your feet, and your knees on fire from the harshness of the floor. You’ll pay for it later, but for now, the soreness is a small price to pay for the exhilaration you’re experiencing with your super hot, hung boss. 
Without warning, he scoops you up in his brawny arms and carries you off to the closest booth adjacent to the kitchen. With your back flat on the table, you feel the cool laminate tabletop on your skin and it adds a stark contrast to the warmth of Joel’s chest pressed against yours moments ago. 
Your upper back is on the small table, leaving just enough room for your hips to slightly dangle off the edge, Joel’s hips between your legs. Your head ghosts the condiment bottles at the edge and he holds you in place there, teasing you. 
He pauses to admire the way you look up at him, your chest rising and falling rapidly, your perky tits slightly falling to the side, a little sheen of sweat on your chest. He pauses to admire the way you still look flustered, but composed, knowing he’s going to fuck every ounce of that right out of you. 
Joel wants to untangle you like a knotted ball of yarn, he wants to claim ownership of every inch of your body, and he doesn’t want to wait any longer. 
He drops to his own knees this time, hooking his thumbs into your underwear to pull them down with him.. His face immediately finds your cunt, and he wastes no time before he lays a trail of soft kisses over your wet and waiting folds. He starts slow, a kiss here, a lap there, and eventually begins to pick up his pace. 
He sinks a thick middle finger into you, and your hips cant up at the welcomed intrusion and your back arches, unable to stay on the table. You feel his hot breath on your cunt, and let out a small mmm at the way he presses his forearm across your lower half to lower you back down to the table, to keep you still. 
His mouth returns to your clit to work you, and he adds another finger, twisting and working them both into you with precision. You’re so fucking close – your slow crawl to the cliff of your orgasm turns into a full-on sprint.
You’re so close, and he can tell by the way your body tenses under him. 
“Please,” you moan. “Please – ugh, neeeeed to come, please let me come,” you beg. 
“Just a little longer, baby. You can come when I say you can.” Joel says, voice slightly muffed against your wet skin.
He presses his lips against your clit, but doesn’t give you enough tongue to get you where you need to go. You’re already so swollen, sensitive – you know all you’ll need is a little suck and you’ll be gone. 
You don’t know how much longer you can stave off your pleasure, but you want to be good for him, to listen, to obey. 
He knows you want to come, that’s obvious, and god does he want to know what you look like when you do, to feel it, to be the reason; but still, he continues to tease and let it build. Your face twists, your jaw goes slack, and your eyes close and it all but screams I’m close, make me come, make me come.
He sucks your clit into his mouth and he grazes it with the top of his tongue and closes around you. You flutter your eyes closed. You warn him that you’re close, “Joel, fuck, please let me come. Please, please, please,” you rasp out your pleas with a symphony of moans. 
Satisfied with your pleading, he decides to take mercy on you. He looks up at you through his thick lashes, drinking in the way he has you melting, the way he has you begging. 
“You can come, baby. Go ahead, want you to soak my face,” he says, voice hoarse but still smooth like velvet.
You obey and feel the taste of your sweet release rush through you like a warm summer breeze on a hot day. Your vision goes white, and your whole body tenses with pleasure as he works you through it. 
“Fuck, so pretty with you come f’me, baby. Being such a good girl, listening to my every command,” he says and lifts his head. His dilated pupils tell you he’s high on it; on you. 
Your slick shines on his beard, illuminated by the atmospheric glow of the streetlights peering into the dark diner. He looks at you, breath slightly ragged, and brings his fingers to his lips to smear the remaining slick from his face onto them, and he pops his finger in his mouth like he’s savoring the last bite of the best meal he’s ever had.
“Taste so fuckin’ delicious, baby. Must be from all that syrup you eat.” 
And shit, it’s filthy. He looks indecent in the most delectable of ways. 
“Gonna fuck you now,” he says, grabbing his thick cock in hand and lining the head of it up against your wet and waiting hole, pausing there before pressing in. You let out a little whine. 
‘Shh, baby,” he coos, “‘m gonna give you what you need, don’t worry,” he says. Both of his hands come to your hips, surely leaving little bruises under his strong grip. Your slick makes it easy for him to bury himself in you to the hilt, even with the size of him. Your greedy cunt taking every inch of him like it’s your fucking job, like it was made for him. 
He pauses for a moment to give you a second to adjust; you feel so full, you swear you feel him in your lungs. 
He begins a relentless pace, thrusting his cock deep inside of you, the obscene sounds of the clapping noises, a wet and wanton song made as a result of your wetness keys you up. 
“Fuck, yes, Joel – YES,” you cry. 
“Yeah? Say thank you to me, baby. Say thank you for giving you this cock, for fucking you dumb,” he commands. 
Thank you – thrust – tha - thrust – thank you, fuck, thrust. 
He fucks into you so hard that your head hits the condiments, knocking them over. The ketchup bottle falls, the sugar packets scatter, and the syrup tips over. A slight ooze of the viscous substance starts to pool on the table and get into your hair, but you don’t care, this feels too good to care. 
Just as you’re about to come, Joel notices the pool of auburn liquid running over the table and onto the red booth below. 
“Tsk, tsk, baby – makin’ a mess – creaming on my cock, and spilling syrup on the floor,” he says, continuing his pace. You feel your walls clench around him. Just as quickly as he entered, he retreats, and you whine at the loss. “Get up,” he says. 
You do as he says and rise onto your legs. They’re shakey like Jell-O. You watch as he reaches over the table and grabs the sticky glass bottle from the table. 
“On your knees again,” he asks of you for the third time tonight. You pause, your body sore and your knees aching. “You hear me, baby? I said get on your knees.” 
You do as he says, and kneel before him, once again worshiping at the altar of the man above you. 
You look up at him with bated breath and watch him use his free hand to rip off his shirt and throw it onto the booth beside him. 
“Come closer,” he says, “and open,” you kneel before him with your mouth open, your inviting tongue waiting to be used. He uses his hand to grab the base of his heavy cock, and he taps it on your widespread tongue a few times before holding the syrup bottle high in the air, centering it above his cock and your open mouth. 
You watch with wide eyes as he tips the bottle over just a smidge, and a long, thin, sticky stream of syrup begins to rain down onto his hardness, falling off the sides of it, down to the floor, and all over your chin. 
“Clean me up, baby,” he says, and your lips close around him. You begin to suck and lick every inch of him, savoring the golden liquid that creates a tantalizing mix of sweetness from the sugar and salt from his pre-cum. You hum as you work him, savoring every bit, and eventually, the skin on his cock is syrup free and you take him at a more consistent pace. You hear Joel groan, and it encourages you to take him deeper, harder, faster. 
You look up at him through wet lashes, tears forming in the corners of them, as he holds your now sticky hair into a makeshift ponytail and uses your mouth. 
“Such a good hole for me,” he says, “so fucking good, baby, you’re so perfect.” 
You let him chase his high, and open wider when you see his jaw tighten and his tight core tense, the grip on your hair pulling tighter. 
“You’re gonna swallow,” he says. “All of it,” he commands, and his jaw goes slack and he releases a rush of warm cum down your throat. It tastes musky, but a little drop of syrup you missed during your cleaning job makes it sweeter. 
“Fuck, darlin’,” he says, panting heavily, holding you on his cock as he throbs out the final pumps of his release. 
He lets go of your hair and you pop off of him and use your fingers to clean off the rest of the syrup from your chin and smile up at him. God, you must look like a wreck. 
He extends out his large palm in a gesture to help you off the floor. As you rise to stand, his fingers find the underside of your jaw and he tilts you up to look at him. 
He looks at you, the darkness behind his eyes has been replaced with someone else; pride. 
“You really are a good listener, baby.” He says.  He gazes down at you, his thumb delicately tracing the contour of your jaw. This moment feels significant.
Leaning in, he tenderly places his lips on yours. The sensation takes your breath away, and as he intensifies the kiss, you willingly welcome the exploration of his tongue, relishing the warmth and savoring his taste. Tonight, you've experienced every other aspect of him, but in this moment time seems to stretch as your lips remain locked.
As he breaks the kiss, a contented smile graces your face, and you feel as if you could float away.
“Now really, let’s eat some food,” he says, letting a low chuckle escape from his lips, “I still owe you some chicken and waffles.” 
“And you owe me a new uniform,” you say, grabbing his hand to follow him to the kitchen, totally naked. 
Joel actually teaches you how to make the meal this time. He offers you another chef's coat to cover your body, but he doesn’t let you keep it on for long. As your breakfast-dinner cooks, he hoists you up on the counter and eats you again. He makes you orgasm more times in one night than you think you ever have with any of your previous partners. 
You were right in your initial thinking. Enough will never be enough when it comes to Joel.
You’ll always want more.
More of this, and more of him. 
And the one thing that’s the most certain is that you’ll most definitely want more fucking syrup. 
Good thing you work at a diner.
END
Bonus Drabble Coming Soon: How will Sydney react when you tell her about your steamy night with Joel?
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Tagging moots and those who showed interest in the preview: @nosesitter @bastardmandennis @untamedheart81 @lavema @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @lovebandrry @dugiioh @frodo-jojo @ghostwritesthings @planet-marz1 @josephquinnswhore @cinnamon-gurlll @dragonfire @drunk-and-capable @peachmy @survivingandenduring @darkheartgatita @hotgirlbedtimescenarios @dins-riduur-anthe
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secretagentsociety · 1 year
Text
loves makes people crazy
yandere dragon X madly in love reader
Here's another idea,a yandere dragon like all powerful and scary the villager is scared of him,the king is scared of him,the Wizards and pretty much everyone and their grandmother is scared of him but then there's you,you different breed of a human decides to see him for the first time and say "yes that's my hubby" and the rest is history
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• people often called you crazy, dilusional and others not so nice insults for being still not being married despite hitting the big 2 0 that and also rejecting the local lords and basically anyone who tries to court you
• now just because people say it doesn't mean you HAVE to follow it yk?oh but you did you played their little fantasy of you being crazy so perfectly people were honestly scared for your mental well being,why?you may ask
• well it's because when khum first arrived at the village (I say first but it's really his 100th time terrorising the village) you decide to whisper something that some people might have heard "he's perfect" you said eyes filled with hearts watching him scaring the sht out of the locals
• honestly you're staring so much he could feel you boring holes into his head,curious he looked around for whoever it is that dared to stare at him for so long and BAM! He saw you,at first he thought you're staring at him in contempt or anger maybe both but then you sigh lovingly and waved at him a fools smile placed upon your face
• he had to look around and points at himself just to made sure he even mouthed "m-me? you're talking to me?!" But you blowing him a kiss and winking made it pretty clear it was him,well let's say after that he couldn't help but think about you "what an odd human" he thought
• "oh my god haven't you heard?! The dragons visit has been so frequent lately our village can't keep affording the rebuilding cost!" One of the villagers said,you aren't paying attention but just hearing him coming back more and more made your heart flutter "I know it's a blessing" you sighed melting into the seat as you remembered the first time he talks to you
•well it happened,khum stood Infront of you folding his hand,what is his plans anyway?kidnapping a human all of a sudden,a weird one at that,"human,do you have a name?" He said
• "you can call me yours,and I'll call you mine" you said "how about the name....treasure?no too basic maybe clove?nah um.....oh darling?" he said tilting his head,khum never thought one day he'd witness a human visibly explode and faint but here we was
• it was a rocky start to the relationship,well...rocky as in everything was so perfect it's scary, here's the recap,on day five of your kidnappings you've opened up to how the villagers had been treating you(not that it's hard to make you open up,all he had to do was give you food and call you pet names while stroking your head and bam! you're dumping your entire trauma onto him) and oh boy was he not happy
• now despite everything he's still a classy dragon,he ofcourse had hoarse of treasure but he also had a pretty nice castle he may or may not seize from a royal you don't have to know that tho so moving on,and with a huge castle come servants and with those come soldiers who needs to maintain security,not that he needs any but you know he likes to have thing's completed and that including the castles needs
• now when his subordinates first saw you absolutely gushing on how cute he was they were absolutely shocked,because one he literally look like a demon ripping out people's heart and two this isn't some flower field it's a grusome battle scene yet you couldn't help but blush when his shirt got torn off,you even closed your eyes to savor the moment after a while
• khum really can't understand your fixation on him,is it like his love for you?but even then he acknowledges your weird behaviour but you literally looked at him as if he was a god,not that he minds,he gotta admit that day he kinda wore a shirt that's a couple of size down so when he does some movements that needs intents flexibility his shirt would rip off in some cool cinematic style,it worked,it worked too well
• so apparently his stamina had their limits he'd come to know it last Night after the battle,oh but the details won't be necessary,oh but don't be fooled if he were to actually try you'd be the one to pass out
• now is he dilusional?nope he knows full well that it's not healthy but does he care?nope he's a powerful dragon,are you dilusional?maybe?...idk...probably....yes?.... Well he is cute so I'll give you that
• he is possesive, but it's really hard to show possesive when the person he loved won't look at other people,you will talk to people normally but once he entered your line of sight the other people can forget ever having a conversation with you
• now for the big question does this technically make you a yandere? maybe..yes.
•i feel the need to say he is 100% taller than you, I'm sorry but it's just the rules 乁⁠(⁠ ⁠•⁠_⁠•⁠ ⁠)⁠ㄏ
• yes he has two pp lets move on now
• he had a way of marking you so other beasts knows to back the fuck off it's called biting,the first night you ever discover the chamber of secrets together(wink wink nudge nudge)he bit down on your neck,it leaves a pretty little flower mark that's imbued with his power it's very very very tiny teeny I cannot stress enough how tiny it is so it's safe
• now if you EVER even say someone else is cute then oh boi oh my,now I have established that he is jealous have I?,no?well too bad because he is,and his jealousy doesn't play nice,he will rip out the heart and torture the person over and over and over each time reviving them again and again and put a curse of Resurrection on them only to leave them in a forest of ravaging beasts that has lost their minds to be feasted upon and tortured until he sees them having suffered enough. ಠ⁠︵⁠ಠ Moral of the story? don't just don't say anyone is cute (yes not even babies) (he won't like k.o them but he will like curse them or sum sht )
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on that note good night people
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draco-after-dark · 4 months
Text
Captured and contained
Little info dump on the whole diamond prison thing with regards to my Feral JD AU
So basically what happened when Velvet and Veneer first captured JD in my au is Veneer is always looking for more animals for his little side zoo project. They happened to be doing a photo shoot outside in the woods for a new album cover. Veneer went on a walk to have some alone time and stumbled across a little goblin boy. Aka JD.
"Oooo aren't you a cute little fella, You would be perfect as desk decoration!"
*JD gets snatched*
Later when Veneer tells Velvet he got a new pet and reveals JD. Her initial reaction is "Okay, but where did you even get that thing it's disgusting." JD proceeds to bite Veneer (multiple times) and wriggle himself free from his hands. He then runs rampant through their dressing room until they manage to contain him in a crystal bottle. The only thing they thought was strong enough to hold him. Later down the line when Velvet captures Floyd (basically the same sequence of events as the movie from here) and starts using him for his talent. That's when they realize that JD is actually a troll as well. JD being JD though is as Velvet described "uncooperative" and "savage" so she refuses to use him for his talent and instead tells Veneer "That one can be yours. You're that one that found that thing anyway." So Veneer does end up using JD for his talent just not nearly as often as Velvet does Floyd. JD does still get hit pretty hard by the whole draining thing considering he is grey and unlike the average troll has in a sense "forgotten/lost" his talent. That doesn't stop him from unleashing hell on the twin every chance he gets. Goblin man will do goblin things
Then things follow the movie pretty much the same except Bruce and Clay end up getting captured when they all break into the dressing room to rescue Floyd. Poppy and Branch end up escaping into the rafters. Velvet ends up sticking Clay and Floyd in her shoulder pads and Veneer gets Bruce. Veneer leaves JD behind in his dressing room because he feels guilty and doesn't want to hurt him any more than he has to.
Fast forward to the family harmony scene where although they are technically down a brother and Floyd is still trapped in Velvet's clutches the 3 brothers and pop sisters sing on anyway. The family harmony DOES end up working to free Floyd and also JD. I'm playing this off on the idea that despite JD not being present physically he could feel the connection to his brothers and their desperation to help Floyd. JD wants the same thing, to free Floyd and that is what connects them all together. It's like Branch said "We don't have to be perfect to be in harmony, We just have to be as we are." (just go with it ok IDK) Once the diamonds are shattered JD is pretty worst for wear, unlike Floyd he doesn't have anyone to support him right off the bat. He is used to being on his own at this point tho and only cares about getting Floyd out. He tucks himself away into a corner of the room behind some furniture to hide and rest up till he can get the both of them out of this hell hole.
Mind you only Floyd knows that he's also being held captive somewhere backstage when all this is happening. So once Floyd regains consciousness and has a chance to take a moment with his brothers. he then immediately goes into full anxiety mode well explaining that they have to get to JD. The others confused about what he's talking about don't believe him at first, but do end up helping Floyd backstage since he keeps insisting that JD needs them. They do end up finding JD and that's where the real story begins.
:D
Hopefully this makes sense? I ain't no writer sorry people
Little bonus scene
"Hey Vel does this look infected to you???"
"I can't believe we're related... CRIMP SCHEDULE A HOSPITAL VISIT BECAUSE MY IDIOT OF A BROTHER GOT BITTEN BY A FUCKING RAT!"
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fefairys · 3 months
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I just read up to the breakup with Meenah and Vriska and fuck, i really dislike that whole situation. Got any thoughts you wanna ramble about regarding that?
OKAY I FINALLY GOT HERE IN MY REREAD.
god yes everything involving meenah and (vriska) and the vriska (vriska) confrontation is extremely fascinating to me. mostly because i resonate with a lot of it so hard it hurts. long ass post below. i got very personal lol what can i say. i vriska.
(vriska) goes into people-pleasing mode when she and meenah are alone. it actually reminds me of how she would sometimes act with kanaya. the vulnerability, mainly. but like. its a little different. with kanaya it was more like 'youre the only bitch around here i respect, but im still better than everyone else. i want you to like me but i dont NEED you to! (<-lie)' but with meenah its like 'you are the only person i have and so i have to be good for you so you dont leave me.'
she backs down super easily with meenah. sometimes she does argue for herself, but ultimately she always ends up deferring to meenah. she wants to agree with everything she says. wants her to like her:
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^ she doesnt want to say the carnival looks fun until she's gotten meenah's approval. she has to be cool for meenah.
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her suggestion gets shot down and she immediately sides with meenah. oh yeah i didnt want to do that anyway in fact i hate horses!
it's tricky, because of some of it seems like actual Character Development, and her getting over some shit. and i definitely think these thinks dont have to be mutually exclusive. she can be realizing things about herself and moving on from them while at the same time falling into habits that are equally unhealthy for a person.
she realizes she used to care way too much about stuff and tries to counter it by not caring at all. she realizes she used to push people around to much and counters it by becoming a pushover herself. this is sickeningly relatable to me.
the scene where meenah convinces her to get a tattoo is a good example of this.
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she realizes that a long-held opinion she had is actually kind of bullshit, and that she cared way too much about it for no reason. good job, vriska!
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but then she pretty much leaves the actual decision of it up to meenah! she asks meenah to tell her what to do instead of thinking for herself. she justifies it by agreeing that she loves pirate stuff anyway! shes trying to make up for a lifetime of bossing people around by asking someone else to boss her around. and she convinces herself that this is making her happy! and i mean it definitely is, in a way. it feels good to feel liked by someone. to have the approval of someone you look up to. it is making her happy. but is that... good for her? i dont know! it doesn't feel good to me.
this stuff is hitting me extremely close to home on this reread because i like JUST came upon the revolution that i kinda did this? not to this extreme polarity, but it still resonates.
i was (kind of am still, it's in my nature) a very bossy and controlling person, and i lost an entire circle of friends because they were rightfully tired of me telling them what to do and being so self-righteous all the time. so when trying to make new friends after that, i turned on people-pleaser mode. and i'm kind of still stuck there and trying to strike a balance between being a doormat people-pleaser and being a huge bitch that wants everyone to behave how *i* want them to. it is a hard balance to strike. its hard knowing when i should stand up and say something and when i should let something go, so most often i let things go. and OFTENTIMES i live to regret it. "i should have said something" is something i've been finding myself thinking A LOT in recent months...
and its tricky, because it feels good when people i respect say they approve of me. i feel happy that someone likes me. but sometimes that has come at the cost of sacrificing parts of myself. and it can feel good in the moment, to feel connected to someone like that, but then one day you wake up full of dread because you dont know who the fuck you are anymore. (vriska) didn't really ever get to that point, or, she never voiced it. vriska points out that shes become an entirely different person, but she does it in a way that uhhh fucking sucks lol! and is not helpful, because vriska's not exactly doing great, herself! she shows off her hypocrisy DELICIOUSLY in this scene.
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she calls (vriska) selfish for.... being dead, essentially. and she justifies all her own selfish actions with it being "for the greater good," just as she always has. this is par for the course with vriska
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^ i looooove this part right here where she sidesteps the fact that she did in fact plan to go fight jack but john punched her in the face to stop her. "different shit happened!" (i actually made the exact same decisions as you, but an outside force changed things and now i feel superior to you because i got a serendipitous opportunity that you didnt)
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this whole conversation hits hard with me. it literally sounds similar to conversations ive had with myself! it's hard to not want to side with (vriska) i mean she does feel like the more reasonable one in this conversation and has had more time to think and reflect on herself, and vriska is being a fucking asshole about it, but like, i don't think either of them is exactly Right?
like, vriska has a bit of a point that (vriska) doesnt seem to notice that she's gone people-pleaser mode. but (vriska) thinks this is what happiness is. she despises her old self who was obsessed with inserting herself into everything and feeling the need to be The Best and prove herself as such, to catastrophic outcomes. so of course she wants to separate herself from that as much as possible and strive to become the opposite of it. someone who doesnt care about shit, and who lets other people make decisions for her instead of her making the decisions for everyone against their will. i think (vriska) was on the right track, but just couldn't really... Get There without the right support. and meenah was definitely not the right support.
but anyways like. vriska yelling at (vriska) at how disgusted she is with her is so sickeningly similar to me, looking back and realizing that i used to like.. stand up for myself more. if someone said some shit i didnt like i TOLD them i had a problem. i didn't let people push me around. and i think god, what happened to me? i became a weak loser that bends to peoples idea of what i should be instead of being myself. am i really happy?
but its not like i was better off before, either. vriska still isn't right. yeah i didnt let people boss me around, because i bossed THEM around. when i told people i had a problem with them i was MEAN about it. i said rude shit unnecessarily. i made everything about me and didn't care about what other people thought.
my past self and my "current" self (maybe like, my 'a few months ago self' i like to think im working through it but im still having trouble lol) are disgusted with each other. im disgusted that i used to straight up bully people all the time, and past me is disgusted that i seemed to have stopped having convictions, that i let other people decide who i should be, etc.
neither of them are really happy, but (vriska) sure seems a lot kinder, at least. she's made progress, but in a way that benefits other people more than it does herself.
also i love vriska saying "what happened to not letting shit get to you because you always knew you were better than the one slinging it" that is such utter bullshit. she is ALWAYS letting stuff get to her. all of her god damn actions are because she lets stuff get to her. everything she does is to prove herself. the cycle of revenge shit?? yeah totally didn't let it get to you. thats why you killed aradia and blinded terezi. because you were just so totally better than them and not letting it get to you. this stuff:
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yeah. letting it roll off your back. lol
anyways back to meenah and (vriska)
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meenah recognizes this vulnerability in (vriska) and it scares her. she does the whole "im abandoning you... for your own good..." thing, which... sucks! as you said, this whole situation just fucken sucks, man.
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(vriska) basically admits that at this point, without meenah, she's lost. she let meenah mold her into what she wanted, and to lose her would be to lose herself.
but i mean i don't think there was another way this could've gone. (vriska) was essentially meenah's rebound after aranea (and vriska is her rebound after (vriska) lol) and it's just.. ALL bad. its just... everyone here has such deep personal issues that they cant help but let effect each other, yknow? meenah realizes that her issues are effecting (vriska) and thinks that removing herself from the situation is best. maybe it is? it turns out okay for (vriska) in the end, at least. as "okay" as she can possibly get, i guess.
i don't know. there's a lot here! it all just hurts and sucks. teens, man. how it is.
this is just my (very personal, frankly) interpretation of the events, idk. i think i said a lot here without actually saying anything all that substantial, as i feel like i tend to do. i just resonate with vriska really hard, what and you gave me an opportunity to ramble about it lol
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reunionatdawn · 22 days
Text
A Midsummer Night's Dream: Analyzing the Romantic Subtext of (Japanese) KH 358/2 Days
Day 94 ~Hearts~
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Roxas: What are we fighting for? Axel: We're fighting for the greater Kingdom Hearts, didn't you see it today? Roxas: [...] Is Kingdom Hearts really that important? Axel: Hey, what are you talking about now? Roxas: But, since I don't have a heart, I don't really understand. Axel: Roxas... If you had a heart, you'd surely understand. That's why we're seeking hearts, right? Roxas: I see... That's right...
I will be using my own translations for most of this meta, because nuance is very often lost in the localization process. The mission for this day took place at the Beast's Castle. Roxas was intrigued that the Beast was personally fighting the Heartless even though he had servants. He had an important reason to fight, something to protect.
This only made Roxas question whether he had any good reason to fight Heartless himself. When he used the word "important" he used "大切な" (taisetsuna). It tends to emphasize emotional or sentimental value rather than practical importance. And in Japanese, it was a tiny bit more suggestive that Axel already knew why having a heart was so important. He already had his own reason to fight.
Day 94: The plan is proceeding smoothly, but... (Saïx) Thanks to Roxas and Xion, the wielders of the Keyblade, hearts have converged, and the great Kingdom Hearts has appeared before us. Our objective is being achieved. Every plan is proceeding smoothly. The fact that everything is going so smoothly is cause for concern, but perhaps I am overthinking it.
In both the Japanese and English versions, Saïx expressed paranoia about how smoothly the process of completing Kingdom Hearts was going. The phrase, "The course of true love never did run smooth" is one of the most famous quotes from A Midsummer Night's Dream. Essentially, the quote suggests that real love is not always easy or straightforward; it requires effort, perseverance, and the ability to overcome obstacles. This quote is relevant because there is evidence that the entire game's narrative was inspired by that play. It's similar to how Versus XIII was originally going to be inspired by Hamlet.
Day 96 ~Xion's Keyblade~
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Sora: Kairi, you can't come. Kairi: Why not? Sora: I can't risk putting you in any more danger. Kairi: But we've faced danger together before, haven't we? I get more anxious when I'm alone. Sora: Even if you're not with us, Kairi, we're not alone anymore. Right? Kairi: Am I a hindrance? Sora: Well, yeah, kind of. Kairi: I see. Okay then. Take this. It's an important charm, so make sure to give it back!
In both the novel and manga, Xion mentioned that she could still feel the warmth of Roxas's hand on his Keyblade. It was meant to bring to mind several scenes from KH1, such as when Sora regained his ability to use the Keyblade, as well as when Kairi gave Sora her lucky charm. Wherever he went, she'd always be with him in his heart.
Axel: Oh, Roxas, are you going to Beast's Castle? I went to investigate yesterday, but those Heartless seemed pretty tough. He might have a hard time alone~. Saïx: Are you suggesting they both go together? Axel: I'm heading to Agrabah. Is that a problem? Saïx: Can you handle defeating the Heartless in Agrabah? Axel: It's fine. I'm strong enough.
The "~" is often used to indicate a trailing off or unfinished thought, similar to an ellipsis (...) in English. It suggests that the speaker is leaving the sentence open-ended or implying that there is more to say but chooses not to express it explicitly.
Axel: Heartless, why do they move so annoyingly? Thanks to them, I got hit. Roxas: Weren't you supposed to be strong? Axel: That's a separate issue.
I think it's more obvious in Japanese that Axel was trying to convince Saïx to let them go together by reminding him of some past situation when Isa relied on Lea in a similar way, leaving him to face a tough situation all by himself. The idea for Roxas to work twice as hard to make up for Xion's uselessness was Axel's idea, after all.
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Xion: It's all thanks to Roxas and Axel. Axel: I didn't do anything. Xion: In the morning, you arranged for us to go on the mission together. Roxas: If it weren't for you, Xion might not have been able to reclaim her Keyblade. Xion: Thanks, Axel.
On Day 72 called "Change," Axel was bothered that Saïx didn't even seem worried about him while he was away at Castle Oblivion. And he did not thank him for doing his dirty work (even at the risk of his own life) when he returned. It was the first thing he mentioned. But Roxas and Xion thanked Axel profusely for his help. And it just seemed to make Axel very depressed.
Axel: How about a sea-salt ice cream? With that, this incident will be water under the bridge.
In English, Day 8 is the day Axel treats Roxas to ice cream and it is called "Icing on the Cake". In Japanese, it's called "ごほうび" (gohoubi). It means "reward" or "prize". It refers to something given in recognition of one's efforts or achievements, often as an incentive or encouragement. It's interesting because Axel didn't like the taste of sea-salt ice cream anymore. In the opening song, he grimaced when he first bit into it. He was only eating it due to its sentimental value.
Roxas: It would be nice if we could always be together like this. Axel: Where did that come from all of a sudden? Roxas: I was thinking it would be nice if every day, after our missions, the three of us could eat ice cream together and watch the sunset. Axel: Well, that's an impossible wish. After all, we're Nobodies.
Axel was pretty blunt here with his cynical outlook.
Pence: I wonder if we can always be together. Olette: I hope so. Hayner: Huh? What's with the sudden talk? Pence: Oh, just thinking. Hayner: Well, realistically, I doubt it. But that's just how it goes when you become an adult, right? What's important isn't how many times we meet, but how many times we think of each other.
Because he was already an adult.
Axel: What's important isn't seeing each other every day. It's more important to always think about each other, even when we can't meet. ...Got it memorized? Roxas: That doesn't suit you. Axel: Shut up.
In the DS version, after his blunt comment, Roxas and Xion lowered their heads. And it was only then that Axel changed his tone. When he used the word "important" he also used "taisetsuna". It would sound quite sentimental, so it's a bit out-of-character for him at this moment in the story. Axel didn't laugh along with Roxas and Xion when they started teasing him. Because his comment wasn't really directed at them. He had only known them a few months and didn't feel particularly sentimental towards them, at least not yet.
Day 96: Friends (Axel) Recently, I feel like I spend more time talking with Roxas and Xion than with my original comrade Saïx. So this is what having friends feels like.
That comment was said with Saïx in mind. On Day 75, Axel told Roxas and Xion that he didn't have a best friend. He used to. But they didn't have the same type of relationship they had as kids anymore. it had been so long since they had spent time hanging out and eating ice cream together that Axel forgot what friendship even felt like.
Day 117 ~Secrets~
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(KH2 Novel) Naminé: Do you think Nobodies really don't have hearts? Who told Axel he doesn't have one? The heart—there are secrets that—
There were many "Secrets" being referenced on this day. The first was the secret of the heart, which Naminé alluded to in the KH2 novelization. This day showed how Axel had begun to grow a heart. He was annoyed that Saïx didn't knock, and he wanted him to get out of his room as soon as possible because it hurt to be around him.
Saïx: "The Chamber of Waking," contrasting with the "Chamber of Repose," holds a true purpose that Xemnas has not disclosed to anyone. Clues to this lie within the "Chamber of Waking." If we seize them, we can gain the upper hand, even concerning our objectives.
Saïx's main priority was completing Kingdom Hearts. But he didn't trust Xemnas and suspected that he had a secret agenda, which turned out to be true, as we saw in Dream, Drop, Distance.
Xion: When I sit here and talk with you guys… I get the strangest feeling… that a long time ago, I used to watch the sunset with somebody else. It's the same when I watch the sea. Someplace by the sea…where I hear the sound of the waves… I get the feeling that I was talking with someone. [...] You have memories, don't you, Axel? Axel: Well, sort of. Even if I do have them, they're not of any use at all.
Another secret was related to Xion's birth. Axel wanted to go to Castle Oblivion because he was curious about her origins. Xion remembered Kairi watching the sunset and telling Sora not to change. It was one of Sora's most precious memories and it was why Xion could awaken a heart. And it was also meant to depict Kairi's anxiety and loneliness over how, as we get older, we find a distance growing between us and our close friends. And that's something she had in common with Axel.
Day 118: What's Changed... (Axel) When I talk with Roxas and Xion, I often reminisce about my days as a human. Reflecting on various childhood memories, I find myself feeling inexplicably strange. I should be able to have such conversations with Saïx, but strangely, I don't feel inclined to do so. It's just a strange sense of nostalgia. It's not me who's changed... it's you.
Based on subtext, we can probably assume that Axel began to awaken a heart by spending time with Roxas and Xion because they reminded him of his childhood. Therefore, Axel's memories of the time he spent with Isa were implied to be his most precious.
Day 119 ~Accomplishment~
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Day 119: Hearts and Emotion (Xaldin) Observing that foolish beast, one can see clearly how humans are often governed by trivial matters. It was precisely because we did not desire to be ruled by emotions that we chose to become Nobodies. It was much later that we realized the magnitude of that loss. While we understand that there are things that cannot be accomplished without a heart, emotions are still unpleasant.
The above quote from A Midsummer Night's Dream was spoken by the character Helena. It reflects the theme of love's unpredictability and irrationality that runs throughout the play. It suggests that the pursuit of love can often defy logical reasoning and that the dictates of the heart may not always conform to the dictates of reason.
Xaldin: If it's something he treasures, it means his heart is captive to it… When the heart is stolen, that becomes a weakness. Roxas: The heart is stolen…? I don't quite understand.
Once again, the word "大切" (taisetsu) was used, to indicate that the Beast fought so hard to protect the rose because he placed value on it for some emotional reason rather than for its practical utility. Xaldin's goal was to use the Beast's weakness to literally steal his heart and turn him into a Heartless. Idiomatically, to have one's heart stolen refers to intense feelings of romantic attraction or love.
Roxas: I understand what [the Beast] treasures now. Xion: What he treasures...? Roxas: But Xaldin said that could become his weakness. Xion: Can something valuable become a weakness? Roxas: I'm not sure... Xion: I wish Axel would come back soon...
Roxas and Xion figured that Axel would surely understand this concept and explain it to them. And in KH2, Axel was desperate to turn Sora into a Heartless, and he knew the way to do that was by targeting the person who stole his heart, which was Kairi.
Ansem's Report 4 Heartless are born from those who have their hearts stolen, and they proliferate by stealing them from other beings. What's stolen by the Heartless becomes the nourishment for creating new Heartless. While there's no certainty, I am confident in my theory. Let's verify it further by providing a large number of organisms. Furthermore, we must continue researching the behavioral principles of Heartless.
We can probably assume, based on the Ansem's Reports from KH1, that Xaldin and Axel both knew all about this principle because of their involvement in Xehanort's research as apprentices.
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Ansem's Report 8 Heartless are naturally born from those who have lost their hearts. If we apply the principle of the heart, could we not synthesize them? Thinking so, I utilized the results of previous research to complete the device. When I tentatively activated it, the Heartless emerged without any problems. If we further improve this device, it may even be possible to generate them from nothing.
The experiment to generate Heartless using the device in the Heartless Manufactory was the topic of Ansem's Report 8 in KH1. During that experiment, the "principle of heart" was used.
Xemnas: The experiment to generate Heartless was an attempt to control the mind and abandon the ego. Even if we made one lose their heart that way, one could still harbor a heart in their body, which serves as a vessel.
And it's clearer in the Japanese version of KH3D that this Heartless-generating experiment was conducted for the purpose of creating a vessel. It's important to note that the word for "mind" is "精神" (seishin). It refers to the mind, spirit, or consciousness of a person.
(KH2 Novel) Saïx: How do you expect to protect anything when you've cloaked yourself in darkness? You sold your soul for power. Was it worth it?
"Seishin" can also mean "soul". While "soul" is a more metaphysical and spiritual concept in English, "seishin" encompasses both the psychological and spiritual dimensions of human consciousness in Japanese. During the experiment, the intended target was most likely Lea. Isa was probably just meant to be his weakness. But Isa probably sold his mind/soul for power in order to protect Lea. And that would most likely be the origin of his beastly berserker state, as well as why Isa became the vessel instead of Lea.
Day 150 ~Fear~
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Xion: One more time... please! Saïx: We don't have that much time on our hands. It's clear you were just a failure, after all.
It's important to note that Saïx used the word "失敗作" (shippaisaku) here. It means "failure" or "failed work." Also, there was a slight change in the localization during this conversation. Saïx didn't say they couldn't afford to waste any more chances. He said they couldn't afford to waste any more time. It's subtle, but it's significant.
Xaldin: Ah… If something isn't done before that rose withers, it seems the curse he was placed under won't be lifted. Roxas: Come to think of it, the servant guy said our time left is short. Xaldin: …He did say that… The curse… the Beast's form… the rose… Hehehe… This could be useful.
In English, you miss out on the uncanny similarity between Saïx and the Beast. They're both cursed, they both wish to become human once more, and both are running out of time. The subtext implies that Saïx wanted to complete Kingdom Hearts because he wanted to love and be loved in return. For who could ever love a beast? Saïx even has a weapon called "Werewolf," a beast tied to the full moon.
Day 150: Handling Xion (Saïx) Is it about time the limit of the replica has been reached? I thought the plan was going smoothly, but ultimately, it's just a puppet… So, of course there's been a problem, after all. I completely fail to understand how this puppet can weigh so heavily on Axel and Roxas's minds. Perhaps we should also consider how to deal with Xion going forward.
"The course of true love never did run smooth". Saïx thought the plan was going smoothly, but of course, it's never so easy. Technically, they would be able to complete Kingdom Hearts with just Roxas. As long as they had one Keybalde wielder, Xion wasn't truly needed. Saïx was quite displeased that Axel was treating Xion as protectively as he used to treat him. And due to that, he wanted to dispose of her.
Roxas: Axel, is there something you don't want to lose? Axel: Something I don't want to lose? Why the sudden question? Roxas: I met someone today who has something they don't want to lose. It's something really precious to them. Xaldin said it could become their weakness. I don't have anything like that... Axel: Well, that's obvious since we don't have hearts. Roxas: Do you think so? For example, if we took away Demyx's sitar, he'd probably object. Axel: Well... I suppose that's true. Even without hearts, there are things we don't want to lose. In that case, for us Nobodies, the things we don't want to lose might be our past memories. Past memories create the things we don't want to lose.
The memories Roxas made since joining the Organization were all he had. That's what he couldn't bear to lose. But what Axel couldn't bear to lose were the memories of his past. His human days. On Day 117, he told Xion that his memories were of no use. He used the phrase "役にも" (yaku ni mo). It means "useful" or "helpful." It indicates that something serves a purpose in some practical way.
But again, the word "taisetsuna" was used, which tends to emphasize emotional or sentimental value rather than practical importance. We can probably conclude that what Axel couldn't bear to lose were his memories of Isa. Because Isa was what he was afraid to lose when he was a human. But since Isa changed, memories were all Axel had left.
Day 152 ~The Wrong Button~
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"The lunatic, the lover, and the poet are of imagination all compact. One sees more devils than vast hell can hold: That is the madman. The lover, all as frantic." (William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream)
There exists a cultural belief that the full moon is tied to mood swings, also known as the "lunar effect" or "lunar influence". "Xion" sounds like "潮" (shio) which is the Japanese word for "tide". And it is the moon's gravitational effect that has an influence on the tides. Symbolically, it was fitting that Saïx was the one who triggered Xion's mood swing and caused her to doubt her purpose for fighting.
The quote from A Midsummer Night's Dream was spoken by Theseus. He suggests that lunatics, lovers, and poets are all deeply influenced by their imaginations. Their thoughts and perceptions are shaped by the creative and often irrational workings of the mind.
The lunatic perceives imaginary demons and threats that aren't present in reality. His mind is consumed by delusions and irrational fears. Similarly, the lover is described as "frantic," indicating that love can also be a state of heightened emotion and irrationality. The lover's imagination may lead them to idealize their beloved or perceive obstacles that aren't actually there.
Axel: ...Girls are complicated, you know. Roxas: How did you know I was thinking about Xion? Axel: Because you're simple, Roxas. Well, all Nobodies are simple, but... Roxas: Are humans complicated? Axel: More complicated than Nobodies, but girls are even more complicated.
Axel obviously thought that Roxas and Xion had a little lovers' spat. And since Roxas had slowly been developing some kind of feelings for Xion due to the influence of Sora's memories of Kairi, that's probably an accurate assumption. Axel just laughed it off because he thought Roxas's infatuation was making him act paranoid.
Axel called Roxas "単純" (tanjun). It means "simple" or "plain." It can refer to something that is easy to understand, uncomplicated, or straightforward. It can also imply a lack of complexity or sophistication. Additionally, it can be used to describe a person who is straightforward or uncomplicated in their thinking or behavior.
(KH Days Novel) "Is this about the defective thing in our midst?" asked Saïx. "Am I that easy to read?" Axel shrugged. "Yes, because you're completely guileless. You always were." "Excuse me? Were you always such a jerk?" Axel retorted, taking a seat on a shelf across from Saïx.
Axel was always giving Roxas advice on matters of the heart based on his own personal experience. Because this day was about the differences between men and women, it's easy to assume that it wasn't about Saïx. But in the novel, Saïx also calls Axel "単純" (tanjun) after Xion collapsed and he was in a bad mood.
In many cultures, the moon is seen as a symbol of feminine energy and is associated with emotions, intuition, and the subconscious mind. Saïx has a few weapons named "Selene" and "Artemis". The writers chose two lunar goddesses from Greek mythology, even though they could easily have chosen male lunar deities such as Chandra or Thoth. This was to associate him with femininity.
Saïx's default weapon called "Lunatic". He also has a weapon called "Crescent" which is part of the Wild Gear set. It is shaped like the symbol for Black Moon Lilith (⚸). She is associated with primal feminine energy and the shadow self. She embodies the darker aspects of the feminine psyche and represents the shadow side of femininity, including themes of rage, jealousy, and vengefulness.
Day 171 ~Love~
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Xaldin: However… the notion of love for a beast…is truly foolish. Roxas: Love? …What is love? Xaldin: It refers to the emotions that are budding between those two. Roxas: Emotions… Xaldin: Hmph… The power of love is nonsense. Roxas: The power of love? Is it some kind of special power?
One of the most famous quotes from A Midsummer Night's Dream is spoken by the character Puck. It reflects his observation of the foolishness and irrational behavior of humans, particularly in matters of love and romance. It has become an iconic quote and is often cited in discussions of human folly and the whims of love.
Roxas: What is love? Axel: Huh? Roxas: How can the power of love be born? Axel: Love is a special power that only humans possess. Roxas: Nobodies don't have it? Axel: Those kinds of things require a heart. Roxas: ... ... ...
Roxas wasn't particularly motivated to complete Kingdom Hearts on Day 94. But on this day, he seemed fascinated with the idea that he could love someone when it was complete. Roxas is simple. It's probably safe to assume that his interest in love had to do with Xion.
Axel: It's born only between beings that are special and more than just friends. That's love. Roxas: More than friends... so like best friends? Axel: It's a bit different from best friends... Roxas: Is there a relationship above best friends? Axel: It's not about above or below. Roxas: I don't really understand... Axel: Well, we don't have hearts, so it's irrelevant to us. Roxas: If we had hearts...would we understand? Axel: Once Kingdom Hearts is completed, you'll understand too.
Axel suggested that once Kingdom Hearts was completed, Roxas would also be able to understand love like humans could. The Japanese wording doesn't explicitly state whether Axel himself already understood or not. But based on the subtext, we can probably assume that he already knew what it was like to feel love. He loved his best friend and wanted to experience that feeling again.
Day 171: Project "No.i" (Saïx) Xion failed her mission. If this state continues in the future, it would be better to eliminate this replica and proceed with copying using the next one, which should result in a replica with higher capabilities. After all, "No.i" is part of the initial batch, so there are concerns about its abilities. The current situation could also be perceived as a malfunction. What on earth is Xemnas thinking?
On this day, Saïx was more determined than ever to dispose of Xion. Of course, as the Shakespeare quotes suggest, he was being entirely irrational and perceiving a threat that wasn't really there.
Day 172 ~Sound of the Surf~
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Saïx: Xion is sleeping right now. Even if you go, you won't be able to do anything. Roxas: It's not about whether I can do anything or not! Saïx: Why are you so concerned about such a failure? Roxas: Failure? Are you talking about Xion?
In Carl Jung's psychology, the concept of the mirror is often used metaphorically to represent the relationship between the conscious ego and the unconscious shadow. The shadow encompasses traits, desires, impulses, and emotions that individuals find unacceptable or shameful, and that they may be repressing. That's why Aqua's shadow-self emerged from the magic mirror.
Jung proposed that individuals often project their unconscious shadow qualities onto others, perceiving them as externalized aspects of themselves. Like a mirror, other people and external events reflect back to us aspects of our own psyche that we may not be aware of or are reluctant to acknowledge.
Saïx: Regardless of what happens to it, it's none of your concern. Roxas: Whether it's my concern or not doesn't matter. Saïx: What's the point of worrying about "something that doesn't exist"? Roxas: We're all in the same boat when it comes to things that don't exist.
Xemnas wasn't bothered by Xion's failure to defeat Riku. Saïx simply wanted to dispose of her because he was jealous. So, he projected aspects of himself that he hated onto her. It all gave me the impression that Isa was probably bad at fighting, failed his missions as an apprentice, and relied on Lea to do most of the work for him.
Saïx: Even if Xion were to break, it wouldn't change your position.
Saïx seemed unable to comprehend that Roxas was motivated by emotions and not because of any practical reasons.
Roxas: Saïx called Xion a failure... Axel: ...Xion is less of a failure than I am.
On this day, when Saïx called Xion a "failure", he used the word "出来損ない" (dekisokonai). The literal translation is "poorly made" or "botched," but it is usually used in a figurative sense. It refers to something or someone that is a failure, disappointment, or underachiever. It can be used to describe something that didn't turn out as expected or desired, or someone who hasn't lived up to their potential. Axel would get the sense that Saïx was referring Xion's failure to complete the missions and not necessarily anything more.
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"You are to discover the identity of the outsider," he told her. "Those are direct orders from Lord Xemnas. Failure is the same as insubordination. You understand that, don't you?" "Wha…?" Xion had no idea that Xemnas had chosen her for this mission. To the best of her knowledge, Saïx was the one in charge of assigning tasks.
However, in both the novel and manga, Saïx told Xion that Xemnas had personally assigned her the mission and that if she failed, it would be the same as insubordination, which is defined as intentional defiance of authority or refusal to obey orders.
Day 172: The Meaning of Words (Axel) There must be a hidden meaning behind Saïx's words. Why doesn't Xion have the qualifications of an Organization member? Saïx said it is what it looks like. Is he implying that she resembles Naminé in some way? It's hard to believe that there's no connection between Naminé and Xion. But then, whose Nobody is Xion? What is Saïx hiding?
So, there may have been a deeper meaning behind Saïx's usage of the word "failure". It potentially means being a traitor. A recusant. And if Xion were labeled a recusant, she would be eliminated.
Day 193 ~Memories~
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Day 193: Dreams, or Memories? (Xion) I finally wake up, just to pass out again? Why? Because I'm a failure? I dreamt the whole while I was out. It was something nostalgic, but what? Why can't I remember? It could be a key memory from my human life. All I can remember is the sound of waves, gentle, in the distance.
In A Midsummer Night's Dream, Helena reflected on how sleep can sometimes provide temporary relief from feelings of sorrow or sadness. Sleep has the ability to close the metaphorical "eye" of sorrow, offering a brief respite from emotional pain. Xion was constantly dreaming about Sora. She wanted to go back "home".
Saïx: It's better for you not to move yet. [...] Roxas is scheduled to go on today's mission with Axel. Your presence is not planned. Xion: I want to go too. I want to limber up a bit. Axel: How about I go as a guardian? Saïx: ... ... ... ...Understood. Do as you please.
Saïx knew what was going on with Xion absorbing Roxas's memories. He knew she was gonna collapse. He only agreed to let them go when Axel offered to go, too. Because he was trying to hurt Axel.
Saïx: In the end, it collapsed again. The failure. Roxas: Don't say it like that...! Axel: Shut your mouth.
Here, Saïx used the word "shippaisaku" again instead of "dekisokonai". Both words refer to something that is considered a failure or disappointment, but there are subtle differences in nuance. "Dekisokonai" can be used broadly to describe various types of failures or shortcomings, such as Xion failing her missions.
"Shippaisaku" is more commonly used to describe unsuccessful creations or projects. It gives off a dehumanizing feel, like you're talking about a thing rather than a person. Axel was very angry, and not just because Saïx called Xion a bad name. That word was triggering to him. After all, the day was called "Memories".
Subject X and Notes on Mental Experimentation 2 During the initial experiment, several candidates were tested, but they all broke down mentally. I did not want anything to happen to her, my special subject. In the midst of all this, it was revealed to my mentor that I had used numerous subjects for testing and repeated experiments. The results of the tests were severely criticized, the research was terminated, and the results destroyed. Not only that, but she disappeared along with the release of many subjects. Where are the subjects now?
Xehanort used "特別な" (tokubetsu na) to refer to Subject X. It means "special" or "unique." It refers to something or someone that is distinctive, extraordinary, or holds significance beyond the ordinary. It implies a sense of rarity, importance, or exceptional value. Roxas and Xion were both special, too. They were all objectively special.
Axel also used "tokubetsu na" to describe how love is only born between people who are special to each other. Isa was probably not considered special like Subject X was. In an objective sense, he was probably considered to be pretty worthless, actually. He was only "special" in a subjective sense because of Lea's feelings for him.
Saïx: ...You've changed. What happened in Castle Oblivion? Are you ready to discard the past?
That was Saïx's only source of value, and he thought Xion threatened to take that away from him. He thought Axel changed because the past was no longer important to him. But that wasn't the case.
Axel: You passed, Sora. You have the power. The power to walk through Castle Oblivion. Guided by memories burned into your heart and precious memories on the brink of being forgotten, you will encounter precious people. Goofy: Can we meet the king? Axel: Think again about who is the most precious to you. The more precious the feelings, the deeper they are hidden in the heart— unable to be recalled. Sora, you must have such memories too. Sora: Me too? Axel: You've lost sight of the light in the darkness, to the point where you've forgotten that you've lost it. [...] But I'll give you a warning. When sleeping memories awaken, you may not be yourself anymore.
The romantic subtext between Roxas and Xion was quite obvious due to their connections to Sora and Kairi. Xion was precious to Roxas because he possessed Sora's most precious memories, which were those of Kairi, the girl who was special to him.
The romantic subtext between Axel and Saïx was a lot more subtle, but it was still there. Axel's memories of Isa were equivalent to Sora's memories of Kairi. After Castle Oblivion, he remembered his most precious person and he was always projecting those precious memories onto Xion. And that was what caused him to change.
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Roxas: ...Are you worried about Xion too? Axel: Of course.
During her dream, Xion was reliving the moment when Sora turned the Keyblade on himself and turned into a Heartless. It was probably the same type of situation with Axel. He seemed to be reminded of something with the sleeping Xion, similar to how the sleeping Roxas reminded Xemnas of when Ventus collapsed. Isa was probably imprisoned in the Chamber of Repose after the failed experiment, similar to Subject X when they first met her.
Roxas: It feels kind of strange. Axel: What do you mean? Roxas: Axel, you hate annoying things, right?
In the localization, Roxas said Axel hates "complications". But I don't think that got the intended message across. Roxas used the word "面倒くさい" (mendokusai). It means "troublesome" or "bothersome". It is often used to describe tasks, situations, or people that are annoying or inconvenient. And that idea fits more with Axel's catchphrase where he always gets stuck with the unpleasant jobs.
Axel: Hey, Roxas... Why do you think we're eating ice cream together every day in that place? Roxas: ...Huh? Axel: I don't have any use for it. If you think about it normally, it's just a hassle, isn't it? [...] Want me to tell you? It's because we're best friends.
Axel used the word "用" (yō). It has several meanings, including "use," "purpose," or "need." He wanted to emphasize that best friends don't value each other for how useful they are in a practical sense. Eating ice cream together has no objective purpose, but that doesn't matter.
Day 255 ~The Longest Day~
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"Things base and vile, holding no quantity, love can transpose to form and dignity. Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind; And therefore is wing'd Cupid painted blind." (William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream)
The above A Midsummer Night's Dream quote is also one of the play's most famous and iconic. And it encapsulates one of the biggest themes of the 358/2 Days narrative. Love is a transformative force that transcends physical appearance and superficial qualities. Love depends not on an objective assessment of appearance or value but rather on an individual perception of the beloved.
The third eye (also called the mind's eye) is an invisible eye, located on the forehead, which provides perception beyond ordinary sight. And I thought it was very interesting that Saïx's scar was located over his third eye, and he was the only one unable to "see" Xion. It does suggest that some sort of mental experimentation was performed.
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Axel stared at him as if trying to figure something out and then grinned. "Right, that first week you could barely form a sentence."
The game began with a preview of Day 255, which was called "The Longest Day." The summer solstice, also known as midsummer, marks the longest day of the year and the shortest night, with the sun reaching its highest point in the sky. A Midsummer Night's Dream is set around the time of the summer solstice. The themes of love, transformation, and the blurring of reality and fantasy were heightened by the setting of the summer solstice. And those themes were also present in the narrative of 358/2 Days as well.
(KH Days Novel) The sun sank lower and lower as Axel watched, his mind wandering. If he stared for too long, the image would burn itself into his eyes, visible even after his eyes were closed. A phantom sun. Someone had once told him why sunsets were red… Who was that?
On Day 96 of the novelization, Axel closed his eyes until he could only see the illusion of the sunset in his mind. And he remembered that someone else told him about the red sunset. There's really no one else it could have been but Isa. It was one of the most precious memories sleeping deep in the shadows of Axel's heart.
Roxas: I don't remember anything before joining the Organization, so for the first few days, I was just in a daze. After that, I wanted to remember everything properly. Axel: Yeah, for about the first week, you couldn't even talk properly, and you're still kind of out of it. Roxas: That's harsh! Axel: Hey Roxas, do you know why the sunset is red? Light comes in different colors, and among them, red reaches the farthest distance. That's why. Roxas: Why are you so proud of that, Axel?
Axel looked off the side before telling Roxas about the red sunset, indicating it was something he'd just remembered in that moment. And his Japanese voice acting during that scene was so nostalgic and wistful. Again, based on subtext, I suspect it was probably the first thing Isa said to him after he became lucid again after his mental breakdown. Which was why Roxas's comment made him remember.
Roxas: Seriously, where is she?
And in Japanese, the day has another meaning. "長い日" (nagai hi) refers to a day that feels exceptionally long or seems to drag on due to various factors such as boredom, exhaustion, or a heavy workload. In Axel's case, it was because he was dreading telling Roxas the news.
276 ~Disorder~
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Xion: Is it that I'm not supposed to exist? Axel: Well, what do you want to do, Xion? Xion: I want…I want to be with you two. Roxas: Then come back with us. Xion: I can't… Not the way I am now. But…what would it take for me to be like you?
In the above quote, Demetrius is addressing Helena, who is convinced that she is awake and experiencing reality. However, Demetrius questions the nature of their current state, suggesting that they might still be asleep and dreaming. This uncertainty reflects the topsy-turvy world created by the interference of the fairies, particularly Puck, who has enchanted the characters with a love potion, causing them to fall in and out of love with each other.
Roxas: I got to go to the beach today for my mission. There was this girl there who looked kind of like Xion…but I couldn't get close enough to tell for sure. I probably imagined it. To be honest, I'm not even sure today's mission really happened. I feel like I just woke up from a dream or something. This is gonna sound crazy, but you know how we promised each other we'd all go to the beach? Well, I think I only saw her there because I wanted her to be there.
Metaphorically, the quote highlights the theme of perception versus reality and the blurred lines between the waking world and the realm of dreams. It suggests that what appears to be real may actually be illusory, and that true understanding can be elusive in a world filled with magical enchantment and shifting emotions.
Day 299 ~Sora~
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Saïx: I see. And what about the man in the black coat? Xemnas: Do not allow any further contact with Roxas. He is nothing more than an impurity hindering Xion becoming a more perfect being. Saïx: Then everything will proceed according to the original plan…
"Things base and vile, holding no quantity, love can transpose to form and dignity." Xion was nothing but a blank puppet and an imaginary number with no quantity. She only took on a form to the perceiver because of Sora's most precious memories within Roxas.
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(KH Days Novel) I just did what I thought was the best thing at the time. For Roxas, for Xion, for the Organization—and for Isa. But most of all for me.
The idea behind "love is blind" is that love can create a kind of emotional blindness, where individuals are unable to see reality objectively. When someone is deeply in love, they may be unable or unwilling to see any faults or imperfections in their partner, even if those flaws would be apparent to an outside observer. This can sometimes lead to situations where people remain in unhealthy or toxic relationships because they are unable to see the negative consequences or red flags due to their intense feelings of love.
Axel: Was this really the right decision? Saïx: For you to say something like that... between that puppet and Roxas, which one is more important to you? Let me change the question. Between your petty friendship game and Roxas's disappearance, which one is more important to you? Everything has returned to normal. It must be the right decision, right? Even Xemnas is annoyed by the recent change in plans. We need to restore everything to normal. It's for our goal, too, Lea.
This time, when Saïx used the word "important" he used "大事な" (daijina) instead of "大切な" (taisetsuna). Both words mean "important" and are often used interchangeably. However, there are subtle differences. As I've said "taisetsuna" is used to emphasize emotional or sentimental value. And typically, "daijina" conveys the sense of something being important in a practical or utilitarian sense.
Saïx didn't seem particularly threatened by Axel's relationship with Roxas. Probably because Axel wasn't put in the position where he had to worry or be as protective of Roxas, the way he was with Xion. And Saïx also knew that Roxas was important to their shared goal of completing Kingdom Hearts. So, Saïx valued him in a utilitarian sense. In essence, he was telling Axel to choose between Xion or him.
Saïx was telling Axel, the assassin, to do the dirty work of eliminating Xion for him. So that their original plan could get back on its smooth course. "Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind." This cutscene was directed to look like the scene from KH2, when Sora closed his eyes and could see Riku in his mind, looking the way he truly was meant to look.
Day 352 ~Sunset~
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(KH Days Novel) "How are you feeling, Roxas?" "…Same as always." Saïx smirked at the reply—and a chill ran through Axel at how vicious it was. "I have an urgent mission especially for you and your Keyblade," said Saïx. "There's a fearsome Heartless that's surfaced in Halloween Town."
In Japanese, Saïx's moniker is "月に舞う" or "Demon Dancing in the Moon". The word used for "demon" was "魔人" (majin). "魔" (ma) means "demon" or "evil spirit," and "人" (jin) means "person". Together, "majin" refers to a person with demonic or supernatural qualities.
Saïx has a pair of same-shaped weapons called "King of the Night" and "Queen of the Night". Dracula is sometimes referred to as "King of the Night," such as in the Castlevania series. Many legends and works of fiction depict vampires as being more powerful and bloodthirsty during the full moon. And while Saïx was always unpleasant, Day 352 is when he showed a truly evil side to his personality. He set Roxas and Xion up to kill each other in Halloween Town underneath the full moon until Axel intervened.
Saïx: Can't you just let things run their course?
"So quick bright things come to confusion." Lysander was reflecting on the transience of happiness and how quickly joyful moments can turn into chaos or confusion. Lysander's observation underscores the theme of instability and unpredictability in matters of love and human relationships, which is a recurring motif throughout the play.
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Day 352: What I Must Do (Xion) I love Roxas and Axel. I think that's what I feel, but I bet Saïx would laugh, saying it's just false emotions fabricated from memory. But I loved spending time with Roxas and Axel on top of the clock tower. I wish we could stay like this, the three of us, forever. But it has to end now. I'll never forget today's sunset. Even if Roxas and Axel forget, I won't forget.
Xion used the word "好き" (suki) instead of "愛" (ai), which was the word used on Day 171. She certainly loved Axel and Roxas, which was why she made the decision to disappear at the Beast's Castle. But I think the writers were trying to emphasize that it was different than what she felt for Sora. Xion was the personification of the memories in the shadows of Sora's heart. She was his shadow self. She didn't want to say goodbye to her best friends, but she also yearned to watch the sunset with the person she loved in the "ai" sense.
Xion: A beautiful sunset. Even though it's the same sunset I've always seen, it looks especially beautiful today. I wish we could always be together like this, the three of us. […] Axel: What's important isn't meeting up every day— Xion: —It's thinking about each other even when we're not together, right?
Axel was definitely lying when he said he'd never seen a Winner ice cream stick before. The fact that their time together as a trio was coming to an end is what made him remember it in the first place. And he used the same words from Day 96. Only that time, he did feel sentimental towards Roxas and Xion. But Axel was trying to be the mature realistic adult in the situation.
Axel: If somebody doesn't break it, someday, you will no longer be you. Roxas will no longer be Roxas. Roxas: I am me. Still the best friend of Axel. Xion is also my important best friend! Axel: No, that's not it. It's not about that, Roxas. Roxas: Enough. Axel: That's not it, Roxas.
The theme "love is blind" also pertained to Roxas's relationship with Xion. To some extent, Axel was able to view the situation with Xion more objectively than Roxas. He could tell that she was a puppet that was absorbing his power and was dangerous. So, the next day, he let her run away from the Organization. He tried to explain the situation logically to Roxas, but Roxas couldn't accept it, and ran away too.
Day 355 ~Unsaid, Unheard~
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"Because they copied my powers, the Keyblade's power, and then they didn't need me anymore—is that it?" Roxas spat. He couldn't bring himself to confirm it. "I guess you felt the same way, huh, Axel?" At those words, something wrenched in his chest, and he could hardly breathe. No, not me. I wasn't thinking like that. I would never. "That's not true. You—you're my best friend." The words spilled out of him.
More than anything, Axel wanted to emphasize that best friends don't value each other for how useful they are. And that no doubt had some connection to his human memories with Isa.
(KH Days Novel) "We don't need them both. Just one. And pretending won't change it." We, who? Axel wanted to ask, but he held it in, along with a bitter laugh. He wasn't sure if that "we" meant Organization XIII or just Saïx and himself. Axel realized how great the rift was between how he remembered past and what he saw now.
Saïx may very well have been possessed by some soul/mind that had other motivations subconsciously driving him to complete Kingdom Hearts at all costs. But all the subtext indicated that his conscious motivations were very simple. He wanted to complete Kingdom Hearts to get his heart back. He wanted the power of Kingdom Hearts because he wanted the power to love and be loved in return.
Day 356: Unforeseen Circumstances (Saïx) Lea, what did you ultimately want? The plan we decided on, entering the Organization together... No, that's already just wishful thinking. Everything has changed. You, and me too…
It would have been quite a twist if Axel and Saïx's big plan was simply being together forever eating ice cream every single day and watching the sunset. And there is a lot of evidence in the original text to suggest that that was indeed their plan. I also found it interesting that in Axel's Report from Day 118, he denied that he changed. But Saïx acknowledged in his final report that he had changed.
Comparing the Organisation members when they were human to when they were in the Organisation, apart from Xehanort, only Isa and Braig have differently-shaped ears and differently-coloured eyes - why is this? Nomura: It's a question of whether or not they're deeply connected to Xehanort. In Braig's case, comparing the scene where he's injured in his battle with Terra and flares up at Xehanort, his appearance afterwards changes, which hints that something happened with Xehanort in between. (BBS Ultimania, March 2010)
Xion was a puppet made to duplicate Sora's powers. And over time, she began to appear as him instead of Kairi. And the thirteen vessels were puppets made to be duplicates of Xehanort. After being experimented on and turned into a vessel, Isa would have noticed certain physical changes such as the golden eyes and pointy ears.
By the way, Braig's dealings with Master Xehanort in Birth by Sleep make sense, he was to become a vessel. Nomura: There is a certain reason for Braig to proudly exclaim, "As for me, I'm already half Xehanort." Isa (Saix) is included too. I think you'll understand the details about their circumstances eventually. What happens to the hearts of those who have had Master Xehanort's heart planted within them? Nomura: They'll gradually be swallowed by it. As for Master Xehanort, he plans to control them completely. The planted parts of the heart are captured rather than disappear. (Famitsu, May 2012)
And maybe Isa didn't want to lose his identity and become someone else. So, he thought it would be better for him to not exist anymore.
Day 356 ~Role~
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(KH Days Novel) "How do you know that?" Axel demanded. "Everyone thinks they're right…" "This is right," Xion said firmly. "It's better this way." Axel hated that argument. Nothing was better any which way. All it came down to was what you wanted to do and what you didn't. He'd learned that lesson back when he had a heart. "So it's better for you to disappear?" he protested.
Because I definitely got the impression that Axel was reliving a situation from his past that was extremely similar to the situation with Xion. And that's what the novelization hinted at, too.
In Japanese, the title for this day is "役目" (yakume). It means "duty" or "role". It refers to a task, responsibility, or function that someone is expected to fulfill or perform. And it's a reference to when Axel says, "The dirty work always seems to fall on me."
Xion: …No holding back now, Axel. Axel: Stop fucking around! Don't underestimate me! I've made up my mind! No matter how many times you guys try to run away, I'll always be there to bring you back!
I don't think the English localization truly captured Axel's anger here. In Japanese, he says, "ふざけんな" (fuzakenna). It's a very direct way of saying "Don't mess with me". Next was "てめーナメてんじゃねーぞ" (teme na meten jane zo). It's a very informal and rather aggressive way of saying "Don't underestimate me" or "Don't look down on me." It's a confrontational expression used to assert oneself and demand respect. The phrase contains strong language (teme), and it comes across as rude. So, swear words are very fitting here.
Xion was a mirror that reflected the memories of those who were bound to Sora in some way. Even Xigbar was able to see her as Ventus at times. When Axel said that he'd bring Xion back, he said "you both". In Japanese, he said "おまえら" (omaera) which means "you guys". It's specifically plural in both languages.
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Axel yells at Xion, "I'll bring you back no matter how many times it takes", but why does the word "you" refer to multiple people? Nomura: That's still a secret as well. But Axel's determination here of "bring you back no matter how many times it takes" is connected to when he said he would bring Roxas back in Kingdom Hearts II. (Famitsu, August 2008)
Nomura said that the reason why Axel was referring to multiple people in that scene was a secret. It wasn't referring to Roxas, but the determination Axel felt toward bringing him back in KH2 was related. And Axel said he'd bring Roxas back even if he had to knock him unconscious. During Axel's showdown with Xion, did she actually take on the appearance of Isa to him? Is that why he could only stare down at the ground in that moment?
Lea said the same lines, "Why do I always get the icky jobs," and "I'll always be there to bring you back," to Xion in KH Days when he brought her back. Does he remember that? Nomura: The nature of the being known as Xion and all memories to do with her were erased, but he would remember other things. (KH3D Ultimania, May 2012)
In KH3D, Lea didn't remember Xion. But it was strongly implied that he did remember making that promise to Isa. Isa was probably one of the test subjects taken away by Ansem the Wise. He didn't want to be a puppet of Xehanort, in either a literal or figurative sense. Lea probably had to bring him back to join the Organization by force. That's why Axel always agreed to do any of the dirty work necessary, even though Saïx was certainly capable of doing it himself.
Day 357 ~Tears~
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Roxas: Did I...hurt you? Xion: No, I'm the one who's trying to disappear on my own. I didn't want to become what Xemnas wanted, so I will go to Sora's side. I just want to return to where I belong. But I have one request. Please release the captured hearts and Kingdom Hearts. Roxas: Release...Kingdom Hearts? Xion: It seems I can't do it anymore. But you can't fulfill Xemnas's wishes. Goodbye, Roxas. Let's meet again. I'm glad I got to see you and Axel. You two are best friends. Don't forget that. Roxas: No… Let's go eat ice cream together as a trio again, Xion.
The flower tatarian aster is known in Japan as the "紫苑" (shion). In Hanakotoba, the Japanese language of flowers, it means "I'll never forget you." Roxas and Xion's Mystery Gear was called "Aubade". An aubade is a form of poetry or music that focuses on the theme of lovers parting at dawn. It typically depicts a scene where lovers must separate as day breaks, often evoking feelings of longing, melancholy, or anticipation. Day 357 was called "Tears". It referred to Roxas's tears when Xion disappeared leaving only a seashell behind.
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Day 357: To My Best Friend (Axel) Roxas is gone... Leaving just the stick labeled "Winner." Typical of him. I bet tomorrow or something we'll get orders to bring him back, but leaving this behind... it really feels like the end, doesn't it? Roxas, are we still the three of us...? Well, no, just two now. Let's get some ice cream again. That's what being best friends is all about.
But it was also referring to Axel when he opened the envelope with the ice cream stick in it. "Queen of the Night" is named after a flower known as "月下美人". It literally means "beauty under the moonlight". The flower's symbolism is derived from its short flowering time. It only blooms one night a year, usually during a full moon. The flower's meaning is to enjoy the small moments because they do not last. In flower language, it represents fleeting beauty and fleeting love.
The word for "beauty" is "美人" (bijin). It means "beautiful person" and usually refers to women. Generally, "bijin" is more commonly associated with feminine beauty in Japanese language and culture. While it can technically be used to describe individuals of any gender who are considered beautiful, the term often carries connotations of traditional or stereotypical feminine beauty standards. "Majin" and "bijin" highlight the vast dichotomy between Saïx and Isa.
Axel: If you want, I'll bring you back too. Saïx: The marks under your eyes are gone, aren't they? Axel: Yeah, I don't need 'em anymore. Saïx: I taught you, who used to be such a crybaby, the charm of inverted tears. Axel: Shut up. Get out of here quickly or I'll kick your ass tomorrow!
In KH3, Saïx noticed that he had a Winner ice cream stick before he brought up the subject of Axel's tear marks. He said that he taught Lea that spell and used the word "おまじない" (omajinai). It means "spell" or "charm." It refers to a ritual or action performed with the belief that it will bring good luck or protect against misfortune.
This subject seemed to embarrass Axel. Lea was his other self, the weak crybaby that he was ashamed of and didn't like to acknowledge. In other words, his shadow. Perhaps back then Isa was trying to be the realistic mature adult, while Lea was the childish one who insisted they would be together forever? And perhaps a Winner ice cream stick was the memento Isa wanted to leave behind so Lea would always keep him in his thoughts?
I don't have a high opinion about the way KH3 handled Axel and Saïx. I understand that there wasn't enough time to show their backstory, so their relationship was sidelined to focus more on other characters. There was still a lot of romantic subtext, but the KH3 team did seem a bit uncomfortable with how utterly gay Saïx was for Axel. So, they tried to retcon his motivations to be entirely about Subject X. Which I think was very disrespectful to the story being told in 358/2 Days.
Day 359 ~The First Day~
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"If we shadows have offended, think but this and all is mended: That you have but slumbered here while these visions did appear. And this weak and idle theme, no more yielding but a dream." (William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream)
The quote "If we shadows have offended" was spoken by Puck in the final scene of the play. He addresses the audience directly, acknowledging that the events of the play, including the magical transformations, misunderstandings, and romantic entanglements, may have caused offense or confusion.
Xion: Roxas, don't be sad. I came from you and Sora. I am you…the same way that I am Sora. You'll forget me, but the memories themselves will never go away. Memories of you and me will always be together…forever, inside him.
By referring to themselves as "shadows," Puck implies that the characters and events of the play are like fleeting illusions or figments of imagination. The quote also serves as a kind of epilogue or closing statement, in which Puck reassures the audience that all will be "mended," or set right, if they view the play's events as nothing more than a fantastical dream experienced during a slumber.
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tired-biscuit · 2 years
Text
Crush
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Part two.
Pairing: Kiba Inuzuka/fem!reader
Warnings: 18+ content [minors dni!!] modern au. dilf!kiba, age gap, thigh riding, daddy kink, unprotected sex.
Word count: 10.6k
Summary: Your best friend's handsome father has sparked your interest for as long as you can remember. Luckily for you, he seems to be just as intrigued.
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YOU have a dilemma.
The dilemma in question is a pretty big one, so to speak. It owns a pair of warm brown eyes that glow like stoked embers in the night when the sun hits them at just the right angle, as well as a broad smile that brings forth dimpled cheeks, and a certain dazzle that makes you weak in the knees for some reason.
It possesses defined, broad shoulders that make a heatwave of sweat tremble over you whenever they flex underneath the simple, white t-shirt that's certainly much too tight to contain them properly. Long legs and equally as muscular, strong thighs that you'd like to sit on as they'd make you bounce in a soothing rhythm. A head of thick, chestnut hair that's turning faintly grey at the temples. Freckles that make you want to draw irregular constellations over the empty spaces of tan, golden skin in-between with the tip of your finger.
You've seen it smile. Frown. Even pout, on particularly rare occasions. Every emotion to grace its sharply-defined features is profound and looks absolutely dazzling. You can't understand how it can possibly be so fucking alluring no matter what it allows you to see, but you've long since learned to stop picking and prodding at the unsolvable enigma.
Why? Because your dilemma is forty-one years old; making it twice your age, despite never showing it.
But also because it is your best friend's father.
---
You've always loved summer.
But goddamn, the fondness you feel for it is hard to show, when the air inside the quaint neighbourhood you and your best friend Jun have found yourselves in, is so hazy that it sticks to your lungs. 
The July heatwave that has been practically terrorizing your country for the last three days has been irritatingly unyielding. Even the sidewalk you and the Inuzuka girl are currently occupying is still warm underneath the flats of your palms, despite that the sun had set literal ages ago.
Now, you can feel as its heat creeps up the tips of your fingers while you busy yourself by lazily tracing the rough ridges within the concrete. The music that has never stopped booming inside the house you've just spent the last few hours blissfully partying your minds out in, somehow sounds far away in the dead of night. 
You tap your converse sneakers to the rhythm lightly; pink nail polish-coated toes curling within the shoe every so often. The songs aren't all that bad, but you've certainly partied to better ones before. Not that it matters.
After all, sitting on a curb and indulging in drunken chatter with your best friend at two in the morning is exceedingly more peaceful and aesthetically pleasing than listening to wasted frat boys, now that you think about it. It's just like one of those scenes in the coming-of-age movies you liked to watch when you were a teenager.
Though, even that doesn't last for long.
Jun's head shoots up when she says, "I think that's him."
"Yeah?" Your reply is spoken with a hitch to your breath.
Your heart performs an extravagant, ever-so-sudden cartwheel as you squint at the headlights to meet your peripheral a moment later. They splash vivid brightness over you, the light so strong that it makes your retinas burn as you push up and spring upward to your feet. 
The familiar sleek-black SUV that slows down to a full-stop in front of you looks like a big, gloomy dark knight amongst the other colourful vehicles to cram the street. You've seen it and rode in it plenty of times before, but it has never stopped looking any less intimidating.
The car reminds you of a proper Batmobile. The thought makes you want to laugh quietly as you wrap your hand around the handle of the back door and pull.
Luckily for you, you're able to repress the chuckle that's bubbling up your throat by sinking your teeth into your gloss-coated bottom lip. The inside of the car is as dark as the night to surround you. There is nobody inside besides the person who you're anxiously looking forward to speak to. Just like always.
"Hi, Mr. Inuzuka!" Your voice acquires a certain, uncharacteristic chirp as soon as you fix your gaze upon the driver of the mafia-looking vehicle.
"Hi, Mr. Inuzuka!" Jun mocks you with a snort that's signaturely derisive for her as she steps in front of you.
Pushing your awfully taunting, wasted best friend inside the shiny BMW with much more force than needed, your upper lip pulls back from your front teeth as soon as you plop onto the backseat yourself, revealing a small smile that's aimed precisely at the man who's sitting behind the steering wheel.
Said man now leans back in his seat with a sigh as he drawls a tired, "Hey, y/n."
He's clearly annoyed for being obligated to pick up his very drunk daughter and her slightly less intoxicated friend at two in the morning right after his work shift, however you're a master when it comes to swiftly brushing off his lack of enthusiasm. You've expected this. Learned his ways a while ago. And because of it, your grin doesn't falter even for a moment.
"How are you on this fine night, Sir?" Irked or not, you're determined to fill the air with bubbly chatter, no matter the amount of visible exhaustion he displays. It's a thing you're pretty good at - pushing people to talk.
Mr. Inuzuka lazily turns his head to the side to look at you as you're shutting the car door closed. Your pulse quickens when his gaze rests on your face: sleepy, amber eyes inspecting your expression of positive furore. You can't stop staring at him.
He's just so dreamy.
You don't know it, but some form of thrill shoots through his chest when he realizes that you're looking right back at him. He stifles it down immediately. Well, he tries to, at least. The tendrils of warmth to surge through his insides are awfully suffocating.
You're too tipsy to catch the way he briefly glances at your lips. Unbeknownst to you, the gorgeous man before you is profoundly fascinated with the way your mouth just keeps on smiling and smiling in that exact moment - gifting him the sweetest beam he's ever been given the chance to see. 
It seems to appear every time you lay your eyes on him, lately, he thinks. 
Can it be a wild, absolutely unreasonable assumption he's making? Yes. But how can he not think that it's meant specifically for him, when he has never seen you smile like that at anybody else but him? Talk so sweetly, too?
It's either that, or... Or you're just a very nice, very affectionate kind of woman by default. Or maybe it doesn't matter who the person to stand opposite you is at all, and you're just messing with him because he's old. The younger generation certainly lacks respect these days, anyways. Who's to say you're not as polite as you seem at first glance?
He doesn't know you all that well, after all. Doesn't know what's brewing behind those pretty, doe-like eyes. Why would he?
"Well, somebody's feelin' rather chipper tonight, huh?" Kiba quickly flicks his stare towards his daughter before he can chew on the thought any further. It's for your and his own sake, he tells himself. Right? "What about you, kiddo? Had fun?"
"Daaad," Jun slurs in reply, prolonging the vowel into a longer, higher pitch, "had fun. Party good. Very good!"
Kiba's lips twitch upwards faintly at the lousy thumbs up the spunky brunette pushes into the air. She waves it around once, twice, before her head tips back against the backrest with a hushed yawn.
You watch as he turns to face the road. He sighs and scrubs a tired hand across his face, rubbing at his temple with two thick fingers that make you ogle for a second longer than what could be considered mannerly. 
You're still leering when he looks up into the rear-view mirror. Fighting back a small smirk from his face which you cannot see anyways, his voice is just an octave softer when he starts the car and says, "Don't cause me trouble, kid."
"Yeah, yeah. I won't puke all over your fancy car, old man." Jun quips back nonchalantly, her eyes already fluttering shut. You have no doubt that she'll pass out as soon as the first mile is behind you.
But unbeknownst to the lovely Inuzuka mini-copy; her father isn't looking at her when he says the words. 
He's looking at you.
Watching them in the rear-view mirror, his eyes remind you of rich, bitter coffee as they reflect the mellow blue light of the dashboard that splashes over you both as soon as the engine whirrs to life. They're nearly the exact same shape and colour of the ones your friend possesses, however a slight difference is visible, if one pays enough heed to notice it. 
After all, despite that she has her father's eyes, Jun has still somehow inherited the warm, compassionate look from her mother - who you've met when she had come to see a school play back in your senior year of high school. 
You hadn't become friends with Jun before that same senior year, and thus had never met her parents properly until the time you had swung by her house for the first time.
By the time you came around for a second time, it was only Jun and her father that took it upon themselves to entertain you during dinner. No ring on his finger in sight and owning a rather exasperated expression during the entire meal; Mr. Inuzuka had gotten divorced.
Speaking of Mr. Inuzuka: his eyes are nothing of the tame sort like his daughter's tend to be. Instead, they are fierce and striking, and are so sharp that they might as well possess the ability to pierce a hole right through your chest and bleed you dry. Even now, as you're looking at him and staring at the sharp pupils that are blown wide in the dark and that keep eating up the irises with pure, relentless greed, he reminds you of a feline that's just about ready to pounce.
The feverish stare makes you sweat and leaves your spine feeling somewhat stiff and tingly. Even your heart is pounding, but your accelerating pulse doesn't stop you from adding your share, "You have nothing to worry about, Mr. Inuzuka. With Jun, I mean."
He blinks at your courage, and in reply doesn't even give you a second to breathe: "You tellin' me that I can rely on you to take care of it, y/n?" 
His voice is so deep that it feels like he's stroking you with every word he utters in that alluringly unbothered drawl. It's causing you to squeeze your thighs together. To rub the plush flesh, too.
You're not completely sure if he wants you to take care of his daughter's possible nausea, or something entirely else, now. But the thrill of attempting to find out is addicting as hell.
Speaking of hell, his eyes are absolutely ferocious. You feel like a helpless fawn as you only hum out a meek, pitiful, "Mhmmm."
It takes him a short moment before he at long last looks away, allowing for your rigid bearing to release some tension. You've even clenched your jaw to the point that it had started to hurt when you finally allowed it to slacken.
"Good, I'll take your word for it." He pauses for a moment as he steps on the gas pedal, "You better not disappoint me, though."
You eye your friend and listen to the deep exhales and faint snores that leave her parted lips in a calm, steady rhythm. She's soundly asleep, and so fast, too! Your voice is merely above a soft murmur because of it, "I'll try not to, Sir."
His own is oddly hushed, "We'll see about that, y/n."
Your saliva turns runny inside your mouth at the rather… Suggestive tone he’s using with you, now - especially at the way he says your name. Could he perhaps be flirting with you? Hinting at something you’re much too eager to initiate? 
No. No way. You’re clearly just imagining things tonight, because you’re tipsy as hell and horny just as hard. Indecent, improper, morally-wrong things. Ones that certainly are not allowed to be mulled over about your best friend’s much older father.
The gears within your head are turning and grinding at the speed of light when he glances at you in the mirror again. You feel like a computer at the information to flood your brain all at once, and are somewhat surprised there aren’t actual sequences of numbers flashing right within your irises from the intensity you’re pondering with in that exact moment. The scenarios you’re conducting within your filthy mind are so overwhelming that they send heat blazing down your middle.
It nestles straight into the pit of your gut. Settles right inside the soft, slick place where you’re yearning for him most and continues to burn until you can feel it angrily pulsate from the starvation you’re making it endure.
You feel like a little cat in heat; stuck in his formidable presence like that.
Yet another typical Friday.
You’re rather surprised to see Mr. Inuzuka washing the last of the dishes when you trudge down the stairs and tiptoe into the kitchen as silently as you can that same night.
After you’ve made sure that Jun is soundly asleep in her bed - dressed in a rather cute set of comfortable pyjamas you’ve somehow managed to force her into, and with the entirety of her make-up taken off by your expert hand - you’ve felt thirsty enough to venture downstairs for some water, or even better: some sweet juice that’s hopefully cold if you take it straight from the fridge.
However as you stand in the middle of the kitchen - his kitchen - now, staring at his massive, potent bearing at half past three in the morning; you can't for the life of you remember why you came down here in the first place.
Actually, you can’t remember anything at all.
He’s still in his uniform, after all. The form-fitting navy blue button-up you’re disrespectfully dragging your eyes over left and right, up and down, hugs his masculine, strong physique nearly to perfection, if it weren’t for the two undone buttons at the top. You can see the collar of the crispy, white t-shirt that’s hiding underneath when he turns to look at you over his shoulder. He’s so fit and vigorous that he reminds you of a bear. No, forget a bear. 
He’s built like a goddamn beast.
A beast that’s washing the dishes at half past three in the morning.
You can’t resist leering at the rippling biceps that are hiding underneath the cotton of the rolled-up sleeves when he turns off the tap and turns his body fully towards your direction. 
He wipes his hands against his thighs before he shoves one into his pocket. The action is done seemingly completely at ease, albeit you fail to notice how the set of broad shoulders and the tight cords within his neck shift into something awfully stiff.
You’re too busy checking him out to realize that he experiences a reaction to your presence, after all.
The pants he’s wearing are equally as nice on the eyes as the shirt. His belt is black. Its titanium belt buckle gleams from the soft glow which comes from the tiny light above the stove and that’s the only source of lighting in the room. You’re nearly narrowing your eyes in an attempt to distinguish which hole he has to push the pin through to make the pants stay in place.
Not that he’d need a belt. They fit him so well that the sight almost makes you drool. 
You’ve never had a thing for servants of the law before, but after seeing him like this - sighing and absolutely exhausted from yet another day of pure chaos in sin city - it seems that police officers might just be your newest kink.
“Can I help you, y/n?”
The blink you manage to accomplish is somewhat slow as you gradually sink back into reality. Looking up into his sun-kissed face, you realize that the man of your dreams and the main subject of your most wicked fantasies is indeed staring at you with one dark brow quirked in absolute amusement.
The sudden wave of embarrassment that washes over you makes you step from one bare foot to the other. The wooden floorboards are warm underneath your soles as you do it. Their heat makes you burn up with even more force.
“Sorry, I-I...” You groan internally at the nervous stutter you’ve just released into the world. He probably thinks of you as nothing more but a snotty brat, now. “I just, uh… I came to get a glass of water, Sir.”
“Thirsty, huh,” he says quietly, eyes unmoving from your own. You catch his gaze fall from your face this time around. He languidly trails it all over your somewhat timid form, dark eyes flicking up and down slowly. Patiently. Way more dilatory than what’d be considered proper. 
He invites you to come closer with a calm gesture of two digits, improper gaze still rowing all over you. “Is the hangover starting to get to ya, sweetheart?”
Your breath catches itself in the back of your throat at the sugary pet name. You know that it’s meant to be nothing but complimentary, but it’s the way he says it that makes your entire body tingle with lewd excitement.
You’re still in your tiny party dress that’s hugging your curves in all the right ways; one thin strap loosely hanging from your naked shoulder. The already low-cut neckline certainly leaves nothing to the imagination from how far it has managed to slip down your chest from all the drunken adventures you’ve been indulging in for the past couple of hours.
It’s no wonder he’s staring when your tits are practically pushing out of their confines. The self-awareness to crash into you all of a sudden is so acute that it nearly makes you stumble mid-step as you finally make your way towards the sink. Towards him.
“I think so,” you mumble as he hands you a glass of water. He’s so much taller than you that you need to look up while you drink the cool liquid; pouty lips wrapping around the rim of the glass ever so softly.
Kiba’s heart is pounding so viciously that it’s making him nauseous. It’s been a while since he’s felt this way around a woman. Since he’s felt his emotions stir into something other than annoyance and sheer, utter boredom. “You need a painkiller?”
Your hum of approval is so gentle that he can barely hear it as you keep drinking the water. He can see your throat bob with every sip you swallow down. It’s nearly hypnotizing, but the small pop! that sounds right when you pull your plush mouth from the glass brings him right back to earth. 
You loose a content sigh, your doe-like eyes still looking up at him the entire time. He can see the sheen of moisture on your upper lip. Can see how red it is from the icy bite.
“Please, Sir.” It’s all you say as you smile that exact beam that makes him weak in the knees even on his bad days. You’re batting your eyelashes up at him as he keeps looking at you; acting so adorably coy that it makes him think he might just have a corruption kink.
And goddamn, just that sentence alone makes him want to slam you right against the counter and fuck your brains out. Until you’re so fucked-out that you’re too stupid to function properly.
Kiba turns away with a click of his jaw and a flutter of a muscle in his cheek. He rummages through the cupboard; firm biceps flexing underneath the professional navy blue as he searches for the little box of Tylenol he keeps around. You’re still looking up at him as he hands you the pill. He watches you take it with a somewhat clouded gaze. Like he isn’t entirely present at that moment.
You pay him no mind as you pop the pill into your mouth and force it down your throat with more water.
The question leaves his mouth before he can stop himself, “Did you swallow it?”
“Yeah,” you reply quietly as you finish the rest of the water and place it back onto the counter, “I did. Do I need to prove it to you, Mr. Policeman?”
He snorts quietly at the petty jab, but it quiets down into silence when you open your mouth and stick your tongue out ever so slightly. The pink tip peeks just past your plump bottom lip. His pupils are dilating so quickly at the sight that it definitely has to hurt.
Gosh, he’s mesmerized.
“See,” you murmur just to make him tick even further, “nothing to worry ‘bout.”
Electricity surges through you when his hand finds your jaw. The callouses that adorn both of his rough palms scrape your soft skin as his thumb presses against your puffy cheek, pushing just enough to make you tip your head back ever so slightly.
He inspects you more closely now, his gaze somewhat soft. It makes you melt into a puddle of sexual frustration. Before you can even react properly, he’s patting your cheek roughly, grinning down at you like a wolf.
“Just wanted to make sure,” he mumbles quietly. Shadows dance within his honey irises every time your gazes connect. It is the most peculiar sight.
You’re nearly purring like an eager feline as you tilt your head and press your soft cheek further against his palm. You can feel his finger pad tracing the cheekbone in short, cautious sweeps, exploring the tender skin. 
A little noise of satisfaction leaves you; your tits squeezing together with the movement of your arms as you press them tighter to your body. The strap of your dress slips even further down your shoulder. You don’t seem to have any intention on fixing it.
Much to your dismay, however, both the sound and sight make Mr. Inuzuka’s entire stature go still as a statue; tan skin pulling taut at the surge of lightning to strike him. He’s about to go absolutely nuts.
He swallows the saliva that has gathered inside his mouth, prominent Adam’s apple bobbing within his throat. And then he’s releasing you from his hold much too quick, much too soon as he realizes his mistake. 
Kiba pauses for a moment, his arm hastily pulling back in one swift motion and leaving the place he touched cold and yearning to be stroked again.
He furrows his brow deeply - seemingly in disappointment. His limb falls limp against his side for a couple of seconds. You can see his digits fidget and twitch before he raises it again and runs his hand over his face, rubbing at his eye in pure, visible frustration. 
He’s looking at you as if you were the one that had burned his conscience with the physical contact. As if you were the one to blame. How ridiculous!
How exactly is this your fault? After all, he was the one who had begun to initiate it in the first place! Not you!
“Mr. Inuzuka,” you question carefully, giving him the best credulous and sweetly innocent look you can manage. Your eyelashes flutter against your warm cheeks as you bite your lip, “is something the matter?”
He pulls back even further at the way you lean into his personal space, expanding the distance between you inside the small kitchen with apparent urgency. His voice is laced with a certain edge that definitely was not present just a moment prior as he mutters his command: “I think it’s better if you went to bed. It’s late.”
His touch is like pure dopamine - even better than that. The hormone floods your brain and makes you unable to think straight, despite that he isn’t touching you anymore. Unfortunately for poor Mr. Inuzuka, you definitely want more of it. 
It’s the reason why you allow for your incisor to poke into your bottom lip again as you look up at him with somewhat of a defiant glint within your eye.
“You’re not my daddy,” you utter gently, knowing damn well that the term is meant more to provoke him than anything else, “and besides; I’m much too old to have a bedtime.”
You’re not going to allow yourself to get shut down that easily. Things are just starting to get interesting.
Meanwhile, he looks like he’s experiencing a glitch within his system at the lewd term. Looks like he’s just about ready to tear you apart for using it, too.
You’re barely holding back a smirk. You don’t want to risk appearing too smug and provoke him further, but anger suits him. His jaw is clenched firmly into place; eyes hard on the prize as he narrows them down at you. Your legs are turning into a state of jelly-like substance because of the stern stare. The racing of your poor heart confirms your suspicion that the reason behind it is definitely not the last remnants of alcohol to otherwise course your veins.
“Darlin’, you’re twenty. Nothing but a mere brat,” he grits out finally, bringing forth that signature obstinacy that his child tends to show as well in exasperating situations. Stubbornness seems to spread through their gene pool by default, because now he’s pushing past you, his side bumping against your own lightly as he passes you and heads for the door. 
You turn to look at him. His broad back is turned towards you, tight muscles flexing underneath navy blue cotton, when he adds: “Someone should teach you some manners, you know. That’s no way to talk to an adult.”
Your retaliation is honed like a knife, “I think you tend to forget that I am also an adult, Sir.”
“Barely.” He waves one hand in your direction before he starts to walk down the hall, dismissing you completely. What a prick.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
He halts mid-step at the rather rude question to leave your lips. It’s out there before you can stop it; before you can think it through enough to make it gentler and more appropriate for his terms of politeness. The assertive tone and its effect causes heat to sear your face when he turns to look at you.
“To the living room,” he replies composedly after a long while. The cool placidity that’s weaved into his voice feels wrong and makes you feel on edge. It’s like the calm before a storm.
You’re sober. You’re fucking sober enough that a hangover is beginning to pound against your frontal lobe, and yet you look him right in the eye and ask: “Mind if I come with, Sir?”
‘Yes,’ he thinks, ‘yes I do fucking mind if you come with. You’ll ruin my life.’
“No,” he says instead, jaw clenched, “and call me Kiba, will ya? The Sir shit you’re using constantly makes me feel ancient.”
“Okay.” He can see you perk up; chest filling with excitement as you coo his name with a playful, little lilt, “Ki-ba.”
The naughty smile you give him right afterwards sets his entire body ablaze. He actually needs to clear his throat to suppress a goddamn growl of frustration that’s trying to force its way out of his mouth.
The absolute nerve. From the both of you.
Kiba isn’t entirely sure how you’ve ended up sitting on his lap.
It was something about your necklace - that he remembers. Some bullshit you’ve spouted the moment you’ve stepped foot into his living room, something about the pretty jewellery bothering you during your sleep just enough that you felt comfortable asking him if he could be the one to take it off.
So, here he is. Sitting on the couch with his daughter’s best friend on his lap. Obliging by tracing her neck with his thick digits; fingering the dainty silver chain like it’ll tear if he even thinks about using force. He’s never even unclasped it.
Nothing can save him now. You’re literally riding his thigh. Getting off on it, too.
God, you’re making him want to go batshit crazy. He can feel how warm the plush flesh of your inner-thighs is as they wrap around his leg. They keep squeezing and tightening every time his fingers venture down the middle of your spine; right over the zipper of your slutty dress that’s making him want to slam his head against the wall.
Don’t get him wrong. Kiba thinks women are hot, pretty - beautiful, even - no matter their attire. When they’re pampered to the gods, or dressed in oversized t-shirts and sweatpants that have certainly seen better days: none of it matters at the end of the day. He’ll still want to smash them just the same. 
But it’s something about this tight, tiny dress you’re wearing that really gets him going. That makes his blood boil and sweat coat his brow. He doesn’t just want to smash this young, vigorous body of yours. 
He wants to break it.
In truth, it’s the fact that you’re trying so hard with it. That you’re fighting tooth and nail to impress him and spark his interest in you so badly, that you’re willing to put this flimsy little thing on and parade it right in front of his nose for hours. Provoke him until he bites.
You’re just the right amount of desperate to feed his ego. And it’s enough to make him sink his teeth into you.
Kiba bounces his knee lightly, wishing that he could see the face you make when he does it. He doesn’t say anything when your breathing picks up in answer and you start to squirm. Your back might be turned towards him, but he can still see just how rigid your spine turns at the friction.
Both of your hands are clasped around his knee as you keep leaning forward; pushing your weight against his leg. Your fingers keep digging into the bone, clawing at his black uniform pants with such urgent need that he can feel the prickle of pain that reappears every couple of seconds. You’re so demanding. He’s forgotten how tiring satisfying young women can get.
You’re causing a mess on his pants. The milky slick you’re leaking sticks to your panties and soaks through the delicate lace as you grind against the rough polyester of his pants. The pressure is godly. It makes you nearly want to rut your hips against his leg, like you’re a goddamn animal of sorts.
Your soaking cunt clenches around nothing and throbs in the beat of your pulse every time he lifts his leg and pushes your panties further between your wet folds, until they’re tugging and pressing against your clit. He never stops bouncing his knee to get you closer to that special place you can’t wait to reach. Just keeps on pushing you further and further, until you can taste heaven on the tip of your tongue.
“Kiba,” you sigh his name out sweetly, teeth chewing on your bottom lip.
The entire situation is so inappropriate, especially the way you speak his name now. He’s never stooped so low, but climbed this high, and it makes his conscience burn with guilt and thrill at the same time. 
“Sweetheart,” he whispers carefully, because he doesn’t dare speak any louder in fear of waking his daughter that’s, hopefully, still asleep upstairs, “we shouldn’t-... You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, y/n. We gotta stop.”
“Nooo,” you whimper in pure, needy panic, every word out of breath, “don’t stop. ‘s too good.”
You sound like a goddamn bimbo; a slut that’s shaken to her very core because he wants to pull back. Kiba can barely keep it in his pants because of the blatant need you’re exhibiting for him.
He groans, but nonetheless wraps his arm around your middle and pushes you down harder on his thigh as if you’re a chore he needs to take care of. The pleasure is enough to make you tip your head back against his shoulder in pure ecstasy with the most delicate moan he’s ever heard.
Your spine presses flush against his heaving chest as your bare feet find stability on top of his thighs. You’re sitting right on top of the hardness that’s hiding underneath layers of clothes. 
The room is getting hotter by the second, exactly like the temperature of the blood that’s rushing to his groin when you grind yourself against him. He can barely think straight, and yet his hand still finds its rightful place on top of your thigh.
You watch as he hooks his fingers around the hem of your dress that’s practically biting into the plush, tender flesh from how tight it is. He falters for a moment - tracing the ridge with the rough pads.
“Are you sure about this?” He stalls even more. “I gotta hear that you actually want this, sweetheart. I don’t wanna… Uh, I-... Lookin’ as pretty as you do makes me wanna do things to ya. Bad things.”
“Yes,” you gasp out, heart racing from the fact that he’s asking for your consent, “want this so bad, daddy. Give it to me.”
Relief washes over him at your approval. It makes his conscience feel just a tad bit lighter underneath all the fog of lust to haunt it from above as he tugs your dress up to your waist in one swift movement.
He looks down as he eyes the black panties to come into view. His attention fixates upon the tiny, baby pink bow at the waistband. On how fucking innocent it tries to seem; sewn on top of the whorish lace like that. 
His hand slips between your legs, two calloused, eager fingers tracing the damp fabric as his mouth finds your ear. He kisses your earlobe, teeth softly nipping in-between every other murmured word: “Oh, so I am your daddy now, huh?”
The laugh he lets out is huffed and breathless when he feels you grow tense in his lap. It makes every nerve end within your body buzz with electricity. Your skin is about to start sizzling and crackling if he keeps this up.
Kiba likes the pressure and the tension. Feeds on it.
Your arm reaches behind you; twitching fingers tangling into his hair and clumsily digging into his cheek when his hand makes its way underneath the lace. You can feel the rough stubble scrape against your palm. It seems that he didn’t get the chance to shave this morning.
“You poor girl,” he coos, gently tsking to bring you back to him, “need me take care of this, don’t ya?”
“Mhmm,” is all you manage, upper lip quivering in delight.
He gathers the sugary slick and sighs in content when you mewl and push further against him. His warm breath tickles the side of your neck before he places a doting kiss upon it. You can’t help but lean into him even more when his teeth graze your skin. It’s like you’re dependent on him. 
Some adult you are.
The way he instantly finds your clit is worth bragging about. Your knees begin to shake as he rubs tight, little circles over your most sensitive part, applying just the right amount of pressure. It makes you want to close your legs together, but he’s persistent on keeping them splayed wide apart by slapping your thigh lightly whenever you try it.
“Let daddy have his fun first, ‘kay, pretty?” he mumbles tiredly as you try to push him further into your panties. He doesn’t budge even as your fingers wrap around his wrist. Just keeps on teasing you, rubbing your arousal all over your clit and pressing all the right buttons that make you want to light yourself on fire.
If it weren’t for the sensations you were experiencing, then the sight would most surely make you drool and burn into ash. 
His hand is just so big. The veins atop his knuckles protrude every time he does that little circle that makes you squirm and cry out, tan skin hiding underneath the flimsy lace.
He keeps the pace. Slow and torturous. Languid. The high that he forces out of you by just pinching and teasing your clit is equally as sluggish and lazy in all the right ways. It’s delicate, but your legs still keep spasming; abused pussy desperately clenching around nothing as it attempts to find something to wrap around.
You’re absolutely dazed. Nobody has made you cum with zero penetration before, even less this hard.
You grunt when his thighs clench underneath you, firm bulge rubbing against your sopping hole. Soft whispers of the most filthy curses spill from your mouth as you grind against the ridge of his clothed cock. God, he seems to own a dick that has a big chance of absolutely destroying you.
Is Jun going to be suspicious if you can’t walk tomorrow?
“Something the matter, sweetheart?” Kiba asks you at your pouting, kissing your sweaty cheek. The concern to lace his voice is clearly mocking, because you can feel his smile against your skin now. It makes you want to punch him square in the face.
“Want you, daddy,” you whimper in reply, brow tightly furrowed in evident frustration, “jus’ wanna feel you inside me already.”
“Yeah?” There it is - that same huffed, breathless laugh as he says, “You wanna sit on daddy’s cock?”
“Yes,” you reply eagerly, heart hammering against your rib cage because it wants out, out, out, “want to sit on it so bad.”
The arm that’s still wrapped around your middle tightens its grip in response. “You want daddy to let you take it for a ride, too?”
“Mhmmm,” you comply, tugging on his hair, “lemme do it. Please, Kiba. Pretty please.” 
The mention of his name turns him stiff. God, this man thrives from dirty talk and strokes to his ego, it seems. Looking as rugged and arrogant as he does, you’re not even all that surprised.
“Okay, baby,” he utters softly, “let’s get you ready, then.”
You sigh in relief when the cool air brushes your tortured pussy as soon as he tugs your panties down your legs with the help of a little bit of your shimmying. 
You don’t comment on the way he stuffs them into the pocket of his pants instead of throwing them on the floor, so that you can put them back on when you’re done. If Jun’s father seems to be a twisted motherfucker that wants to keep a trophy, you might as well let him.
“That lil’ pussy of yours is so cute, sweetheart,” he sighs quietly, listening intently to every squelching sound and smack, “just look how it’s eating up my fingers. I love it.”
Your face grows hot from the lewd compliment. You might just pass out from the praise.
He fingers you properly now; two fingers stroking your velvety walls with each pump, every ridge and brush of knuckle only making you puff your already shallow breaths out. You’re sweating, every inch of your body is covered in salt as he tugs the upper half of your dress down to your waist to expose your tits.
Kiba doesn’t say anything about the fact that you aren’t wearing a bra. He just pinches and rolls one peaked nipple between two fingers while abusing your cunt with his other hand - all while whispering the most dirty, obscene things into your ear.
You can barely keep your eyes open and your mouth closed. Your toes are starting to curl against his thighs when he picks up his pace and presses his thumb against your greedy clit. He’s got you exposed and splayed wide apart on top of him like you’re a slut. Maybe, it’s because you are one.
I mean, who in their right mind throws themselves in front of their best friend’s father?
“I‘m gonna-... Mm, ‘m gonna cum soon,” you manage with tightly knit brows. The gasps you're taking are sharp and irregular from how much rougher he is with bringing you to your orgasm than he was the first time around.
“Cum for me, cutie,” he murmurs softly, kissing your jaw and neck, but never hard enough to leave a mark, “show me how good of a girl you can be for your daddy.”
The noises that bounce off the walls are improper and mix with your heavy breathing. You’re trying your hardest not to let out a sound as your insides at long last clench and hold their tenacious grip when you’re pushed over the edge for a second time.
“Attagirl,” Kiba whispers against your temple as your juices spill and leak all over his hand. You can hear him chuckle quietly at the way your body shakes with the orgasm to hit you. He rubs your arousal all over your pussy after he pulls his digits out of your slick warmth. The oversensitivity makes you whine in protest.
He makes you quiet by shoving those same fingers inside your panting mouth. You taste yourself as he runs them along your tongue. He traces it lightly, dark eyes keen to watch as your lips wrap around the knuckles softly.
“Suck on ‘em,” he orders you quietly, husky voice strained, “I wanna see that pretty mouth of yours working, instead of complaining.”
You do as he says; tongue twirling around both finger pads. There’s no other option. But the way his pupils are dilating like goddamn saucers tells you that he indeed was lusting for you back in the car.
It’s that same raw, animalistic look.
And he just can’t hold that greedy, possessive side of him back anymore. It’s time to slam. And it’s time to slam home.
Before you know it, he’s lifting you up with both hands just enough to undo his belt and zipper. You can’t help but ogle at his cock when he rubs it against your pussy to lube it up; his fist that he keeps wrapped around the base firm. Kiba pumps it a couple of times to spread the slick and pre-cum. He’s throbbing; looking so big, hot and ready for you.
It makes you nervous. He’s used the exact same beast to literally produce your best friend, who you cherish so, so much.
Honestly, you should be ashamed of yourself.
“Ready, baby?” His voice is so low that it makes your spine vibrate when you rest it against his chest. It’s like rumbling of thunder before a massive storm.
“Ye-Yeah,” is all you succeed in uttering. You’ll handle the shame later.
He shoves his dick inside you with such potent need and strength that you feel like you’re going to break apart at the seams. Your squeak of surprise makes his heart jump. Makes him groan in pleasure when that initial buzz washes over him.
“Fuck,” he curses through gritted teeth as he sucks in a sharp breath with every inch that glides further up your drenched heat, “how the fuck are you still so goddamn tight? I thought I’ve made sure-... Christ.”
Tears form at your waterline; mouth forming a small ‘o’ at the burning stretch when you whip your head to the side to look at him. Does he actually think that he’s going to fit? You doubt it. You seriously doubt it.
“It’s oh-okay,” you splutter out, jaw clenching as you try to swallow the runny saliva. 
“No, it ain’t,” he replies in an instant, eyes hard on your own, “you gotta relax. It’ll hurt otherwise, and I don’t want that.”
He’s staring at you as if he’s stated common knowledge that every male should know. You can’t help but feel absolutely flabbergasted.
This is the difference between a boy and a man. A man that is experienced and knows that being this tight is never a good sign. That wants to help you ease into your own pleasure before he starts chasing his own.
“Relax, sweetheart,” he repeats, kissing your open mouth that makes a pop! noise, “I’m not gonna do anything you don’t want.”
The affectionate peck surprises you. You would have never thought that he cares about you enough to kiss you, but it makes you forget about the tension and pressure you feel inside your lower stomach for just a fraction of a second; enough for him to slip into you yet another inch.
“God,” he groans against your mouth when you latch it to his own hungrily, “I love this. You feel so fuckin’ good sitting on my dick like that… Look real cute while doing it, too.”
Your teeth clash against his own. It’s messy and sloppy with every click of tooth; every kiss panting and starving. He tastes like spearmint, and you like bitter liquor and your blissful release. It’s a peculiar combination, but neither of you bothers enough to care about it.
“Daddy feels good, too,” you reply quietly, eyes soft and glassy when he pulls back. A small smile graces your features as he strokes you down the middle of your chest, fingers delicately trailing right down to your stomach. The touch is tender.
Something more intimate.
“Yeah?” The question is nothing more but a whisper: “You like it?”
“Love it.” It’s the truth.
He stares at you, plump, rosy lips slightly parted when he bottoms out within you at long last after a few more short, patient pushes. Silence surrounds you, but it’s comforting as you listen to each other’s breathing and thumping heartbeats. 
He looks so handsome; with his hair ruffled and his shirt unbuttoned all the way down. Your spine is pressing against the white t-shirt. You can smell his cologne as it practically hugs your senses and makes them its bitch.
Goodness, he smells heavenly. Prime example of masculinity.
“C’mere,” he says, caressing your cheek, “lemme kiss you properly.”
You part your lips to allow his tongue in. He glides it over your teeth and across the roof of your mouth as you lightly suck on it. Every time your lips brush together, it’s gentle. He bites into your bottom lip. Tugs on it. All of that while his hands are exploring you.
Kiba can’t get enough of you. You’re just so young that you’re practically buzzing with energy. Static crackles on your skin and makes it so hot to the touch that the tips of his fingers tingle whenever he makes contact with you. You’re like your own personal powerhouse, and he’s the leech.
Your body is so tight and pretty that he can’t stop running his hands over it. The contrast between his beaten up knuckles and your smooth skin makes his chest tighten. He tries not to look at his ring finger too much. The tan lines have long since disappeared, but it still looks weird, stripped bare of the band of gold like that.
Your soft, whiny moans reach his ears and bring him right back. Your back arches when he cups your tits and gives them both a firm squeeze; chest pushing further into his hands. He can nearly feel you purring when his fingers find your clit again.
Kiba can’t help but sigh.
You’re like a cherished possession, despite not belonging to him. The situation is complex, after all. Fucking you like this makes him realize that you are all that he wants, but cannot have.
He doesn’t know how he should feel about it. He’s got a Tinder date tomorrow night with a woman his own age, and here he is: fucking his daughter’s bestie, or whatever the fuck you two tend to call each other on the daily.
One thing is clear, however. If he ever decides to go through with that date, he’s absolutely sure that he’ll have nothing but you on his mind. You’re just too addictive, now that he’s gotten a taste. Too goddamn sweet, even though he prefers savoury.
Who can he blame for this? You for making him give into temptation? Himself for allowing it to happen in the first place? His ex-wife, who had grown cold and distant and divorced him for another man?
None of it matters, really. Not when you’re leaking milky arousal right down to his balls whenever you bounce on top of his cock and he has the pleasure of absolutely ravaging you right here, right now.
“Daddy…!” Your cry is soft when he grabs you and pushes you onto the couch; spine pressing flush against the cushions. He looms above you as he quickly yanks the button-up off and pulls the white t-shirt over his head.
Jesus Christ, he’s ripped. His shoulders are broad and defined, his abs prominent. He isn’t as vigorous as he once was when he was younger, but he’s definitely bigger; more powerful. And you: you’re definitely into cops. Absolutely.
He looks down at you, now, one dark brow quirked in puzzlement at the sight of absolute awe to show up on your face. “What?”
Your teeth sink into your bottom lip as you push your legs further apart for him. “Nothin’.”
He chuckles at the invitation. Leans in until your smooth legs are wrapping around his waist tightly. He kisses your forehead. Your nose. Lips and chest - tongue swirling over both sensitive buds. He wraps his mouth around one, sucking softly until you’re running your fingers through his chestnut hair, begging him to fill you up again. 
It’s only when his mouth finds your pussy that you start to writhe. He only kisses it softly; placing one wet, open-mouthed kiss upon your clit that nearly makes you shiver before his calloused hands find the back of your thighs and he pushes forward.
Your own hands rest just underneath your knees as he forces himself into you and makes your legs bend until they’re pressed right against your chest. God, you feel like you’re going to explode. It’s too good. You’re so lucky.
His palm rests on your abdomen. You can feel his fingers dig into the soft flesh as he keeps screwing the living shit out of you. One corner of his mouth quirks into a smile. He’s clearly enjoying himself and the fact that he can feel the bulge to poke just underneath your skin whenever he pushes in.
“Feels good, sweetheart?”
All you can do is nod vigorously. Tears are welling up inside your eyes and your chest is shaking with every inhale you take. You can’t open your mouth or else you’ll sob. It’s a slow pace that he’s chosen, but the angle makes him push in so deep that you’re reserving your place in the afterlife.
“Really,” he questions cautiously, leaning in to kiss you again. Every brush of lip is loving and delicate, even as one hooks to his sharp canine incisor, “wanna tell me how good it feels?”
He needs reassurance. He’s been divorced for two years.
“‘s just so good, daddy,” you squeak out when he rolls his hips into you and grinds a piece of your soul out, “can’t con-concentrate ‘cause of it.”
“Got fucked dumb by daddy?”
“Mhmmm.”
He grins, amber eyes twinkling with amusement, “Cute.”
Jun’s father makes you cum once. Twice. Sweat covers his forehead as he keeps pushing your limits and making you tighten around him over and over again. Your pussy has acquired a pulse of its own as it keeps squeezing and releasing his dick; forming a decent ring of creamy slick right at his base.
He can’t stop staring at you. You’re mesmerizing from how goddamn adorable and responsive you are. You’re taking his cock like a champ. Scratching his shoulders and back with your manicured nails. Whispering and moaning into his ear. His ex-wife had never been like that, not even when they were still on good terms.
It makes him delay his orgasm for as long as he can, because he doesn’t want it to get awkward. Doesn’t want you to realize your mistake. He just wants you and this raw, primal feeling that makes his heart burn. That makes it hard to speak.
It’s nearly five in the morning when he finally gives in, because you’re begging him to. You’re riding him, your dainty palms pressing against his chest as he starts to buck his hips upward. Starts rutting into you with more force - with the aim to break.
You’re fighting every urge not to scream when he starts slamming home: hitting that sweet, gushy spot within you over and over again, his broad palms locked in on your hips. He isn’t allowing you to move. Just makes you take it. Over and over again.
Until you finally cum for yet another time, with your eyes rolling back and your mouth hanging open. It’s so intense that he needs to pull out before he spills his own release all over your stomach and the dress that’s still gathered around your waist; his palm fisting his cock that still glistens with your arousal until it’s pumped dry.
You wince when the hot ropes of cum hit your skin. Pout when you see the mess he’s made all over your once-pretty dress. You can’t argue about it, though, because you’ve made an even bigger mess on his pants, so that’s just great.
“Oh, Kiba,” you sigh before you faceplant directly onto his chest. You’re just so tired. Sleepy. Spent. Barely alive.
He blinks at the weary tone you’ve used. Caresses your cheek once before he swiftly turns you both around. Before you can even voice your confusion, he pecks your lips, fixes a cushion underneath your head and stands up.
You’re too tired to follow after him. Much less to make yourself decent. The entire room smells like sex, anyway. You doubt your naked body makes a difference.
Dawn seeps through the windows, its light mellow and throwing odd shadows all over the place as he comes back a couple of minutes later; dressed in nothing but his unzipped pants that are still covered in your satisfaction and holding a clean, damp towel in one hand and a glass of water in the other.
His voice is hoarse when he says, “Drink up.”
He places the glass into your hand as soon as you sit up and support yourself with your elbows. You’re sipping on the water he’s brought you, absolutely parched and staring at him when he hovers over you. 
Kiba cleans his release off of your tummy carefully, his eyes never once glancing up to look at you as he collects the strings of cum with the towel. He notices the way your stomach winces every time. How shaky your breathing turns.
Watching him like this; you realize that this is the first time a man has done this for you. You can’t help but feel absolutely astonished, and a little bit puzzled.
Is this what proper aftercare looks like?
“Sorry about your dress,” he mutters after a while, cutting your train of thought, “I tried to clean it as best as I could.”
“It’s okay,” you reply, tilting your head to the side. He still refuses to look at you.
His teeth sink into his bottom lip as he ponders on his next move. He drops the towel to the ground and runs a tired hand across his face and hair. The exhale to leave him is pure frustration. “Listen, I-”
“I won’t tell anyone,” your voice cuts him off in an instant. He looks up at you at the claim, eyes wide open and searching for any sign of deceit. All you offer him is a smile. “If that’s what you wanted me to say, then yeah… I won’t tell anyone. I get the shitshow I could cause you and I’ve got no interest in doing that.”
“I, uh…” He looks completely lost at your bold honesty, face red and hair ruffled. Even the tips of his ears are turning red when he groans and hides his face behind his palms tiredly. “I’m sorry. I don’t want you to think that you’re... Not good enough, or something.”
“It’s fine.”
“It isn’t.”
“It really is, Mr. Inuzuka.”
“It isn’t. And stop calling me that. I just-... You can’t-... Ugh.”
“I think it’s better if I head to bed,” you mumble, finishing the glass of water, “Jun might wake up and it isn’t dark outside anymore. Besides, this is getting awkward.”
He visibly stiffens at the mention of his daughter. God, he’s just fucked her best friend. Oh, lord. He feels like he’s going to pass out. Jun is going to kill him if she finds out! She’s going to bury him six feet under. “I-I guess so, yeah.”
Kiba can’t hide the confusion he feels at how calmly you’re taking this entire ordeal. He watches as you push up to your feet and fix your dress the way it’s supposed to be worn, even though it’s sticking to your skin from how damp it is because of your and his own sweat. He doesn’t even want to look at the stains. They’d just make him feel worse.
“It was fun, by the way,” you utter, fixing the strap upon your shoulder.
“Yeah.” His brain still feels too fuzzy to comment anything further on the subject.
You wink at him, aiming for the hallway like he hasn’t just spent the last aeon rearranging your guts. But he can see the way your knees buck. The way you walk funny as you turn to look at him over your shoulder. “Night, Mr. Inuzuka.” 
“Don’t call me-” he starts, however you’re fast to cut him off.
“Jun will grow suspicious if I start calling you by your name all of a sudden, won’t she?”
“Right…” He doesn’t say anything else as he watches you turn around briskly and tiptoe up the staircase with a sheepish grin and a wave.
“By the way, you can keep the panties. Those aren’t my favourite, anyway.”
His hand immediately rests over his pocket. He’s entirely red in the face as he utters a meek, “O-Okay.”
The laugh you let out is sweet as summer honey before you disappear upstairs. He can hear the soft pitter-patter of your feet before the door of Jun’s room clicks shut a moment later.
He stands in the middle of his living room with a heart that feels swollen and all kinds of weird.
Fuck, you’re his dream girl.
Kiba doesn’t know what to do.
He just can’t stop staring at you as you sit across the table from him that morning; drinking strawberry juice and eating your pancakes like last night had never even happened at all.
You’ve showered and changed clothes after sleeping next to Jun for a couple of hours, smelling just like her father and feeling full of him. Now, you smell like soap and your hair is tied into a loose ponytail that makes all the little hairs that frame your face stick out in the most adorable way. 
You’re dressed in a pair of comfortable leggings and a cute crop top. The leggings are so tight and hug your ass so perfectly that he nearly choked on his coffee when you went to get more juice from the fridge. Especially when you bent over at just the right angle.
He knows that you’ve expected him to look. He’s been following your every move like a hawk ever since you’ve stepped foot into the kitchen.
“Dad.”
And can you blame him? You’re just so pretty.
“Daaad. Earth to father, hello?”
He could smell you on his fingers and taste you in his mouth right until he showered this morning.
“Dad!”
The sudden pain to surge through his shin makes him wince when you kick him underneath the table. Kiba’s nose crinkles, a small groan leaving his lips that reminds you of yesterday when his empty stare turns into a vicious glare.
“What? What is it, kid?” He swats away the hand that Jun insists on waving right in front of his face in pure annoyance. Besides the subtle quirk of your mouth, nothing else shows that you’re paying attention to him as you continue chewing on your pancakes.
“What’s up with you, old man?” Jun says, pointing her fork towards him accusingly.
Kiba shakes his head much too quickly. “Nothing is ‘up’ with me.”
“You’re acting strange,” his daughter insists.
“Am not.”
“Are too!”
“Nu-uh!”
“Yu-uh!”
“Then why were you-”
“I think I’ll be heading home soon.”
Your sentence makes both father and daughter put a stop to their quarrel. You’re not entirely sure which one seems more upset that you’re leaving. It’s quite funny, actually.
“Oh, already?” Jun asks with a pout.
“Yep! About time I got out of your hair.” You grin at your best friend, shrugging lightly.
“I can, uh… I can give you a ride, if you want,” Kiba says. He sure can.
“That’d be cool, Mr. Inuzuka. I’m still feeling really tired from yesterday, so it’s better than taking the bus.” You sigh, ignoring the way his pupils dilate at the hint. “Imma just go get my stuff ready.”
“Okay,” he replies much too eagerly, much too obviously. He’s absolutely smitten by you. God help him.
Luckily, Jun doesn’t say anything. She’s too busy staring at her phone, responding to a text from, you’re guessing, her boyfriend and chuckling. That is, until Kiba copies your own move from earlier, and kicks her right in the shin.
The Inuzuka brunette hisses in pain. “Hey!”
“Say bye to your friend, Jun,” her father grits out, jerking his chin towards you, “you’re not seeing her until you come back from your mom’s next week.”
Your brow quirks as you look at him.
“Is that so?”
You spend nearly every day with Mr. Inuzuka that following week.
It’s done in secret and oftentimes only after dark falls, but you still have fun watching movies with him, messing with his gaming console and sitting on his dick every moment of free time in-between.
You sleep in his bed. He sends you a good morning text when he’s able while he’s on the job and you send him a naked picture of yourself writhing on top of his bed sheets in return. 
He’s actually way funnier and sweeter than you would have thought at first glance. You realize that you like him way more than you initially did.
Perhaps you could even say that you’re crushing on him, in a way. But you’re way too old for that. And so is he. Obviously.
However, as you’re standing underneath the shower with him and staring up into his eyes on the third day you’ve spent at his house, you can’t help but think otherwise. He’s just so happy and full of life around you. Even his eyes seem golden from raw glee.
It’s the reason why you say, “I think I’ve got a crush on you.”
Your face heats up at the confession, because it’s firstly: silly, and secondly: absolutely true. You do have a crush on him. A big one. Your heart races every time he’s around you, and whenever he touches you, it feels electric.
Who knows what’ll happen. This probably won’t work out in the end, but you can both enjoy it while it lasts, right?
Kiba seems to know exactly what you’re thinking about, because now he’s caressing your face, smiling from ear to ear as he says,
“I think I’ve got a crush on you, too, sweetheart.”
831 notes · View notes
hunieday · 2 months
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Yuki - Daily Life Rabbit chat part 2 - Red Light Green Light
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PART 1 - PART 2 - PART 3 - PART 4 - PART 5
Please note that I am not a professional translator and I'm only doing this to share the side materials to those who cannot access them, if you notice any mistakes please let me know nicely. Enjoy!
Takanashi Tsumugi: Thank you for your hard work. I might arrive a little late for today’s drama shoot due to another engagement…!
Takanashi Tsumugi: I look forward to greeting you as soon as I arrive, thank you very much.
Yuki: Thank you for going out of your way
Yuki: Please accept the pen case from Okarin
Takanashi Tsumugi: Understood. I apologize for the inconvenience...!
Yuki: Be careful on your way here
Yuki: We're currently shooting a scene with Yamato-kun and Minami-kun.
Takanashi Tsumugi: The scene where the two rookie detectives chase after the escaping criminal, right...!
Yuki: That’s right. They’re rivals, they don’t get along, so they pin the blame on each other and say “it’s your fault he ran away” as they chase after him.
Yuki: It's a comical but tense scene, so it's quite challenging.
Yuki: It’s supposed to be the gripping opening scene for the drama, so the director’s being particular about it and they had to reshoot many times.
CHOICE:
1) How is Yamato-san doing?
Yuki: The scene involves a lot of running so it’s tough, but he's doing his best. He actively listens to what the director has to say to understand his intentions.
2) How is Natsume-san doing?
Yuki: His delicate facial expressions are excellent. Looks like the experience he’s built up since he was a child actor is seeping into his acting. 
3) What did you two chat about?
Yuki: We talked about grabbing dinner after the shoot. Apparently there’s a delicious shop nearby that sells tomato ramen.
Yuki: It’s cool outside, but the sun is blazing, so it must be difficult to run.
Yuki: They were playing in the park earlier, aren’t they tough?
Takanashi Tsumugi: They were playing during your break?
Yuki: That's right.
Yuki: They were playing "Red light Green light" with the child actors.
Takanashi Tsumugi: How nostalgic...! I used to play it a lot when I was little!
Yuki: It had been a long time for me as well
Yuki: I was sweating bullets when they asked me to play tag at first
Takanashi Tsumugi: You managed to avoid it! LOL
Yuki: Yup. Minami-kun must have sensed it and suggested playing "Red light Green light"
Yuki: I started to see a halo shining around him
Takanashi Tsumugi: 
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Yuki: Just standing in the shade of a tree was good enough for me. He saved my butt
Takanashi Tsumugi: Yuki-san, were you "it" by any chance?
Yuki: You figured it out fast
Takanashi Tsumugi: You don’t have to move much when you’re “it”, so I thought it might be the case...!
Yuki: As expected of Maneko-chan ^^
Yuki: Yamato-kun likes to save his energy and stands still every time, so I kept it entertaining by changing the speed and specifying poses on purpose.
Takanashi Tsumugi: What kind of poses did you instruct?
Yuki: A banana pose for example, while raising both hands diagonally
Yuki: It was a great hit with the kids ^^
Yuki: Yamato-kun is pretty good at handling children. He approached those who were left out and generally was a good big bro
Takanashi Tsumugi: He often plays with little kids on other sets as well.
Takanashi Tsumugi: One time a child who co-starred with him cried at the end of a shoot because they wanted to play with him more...
Takanashi Tsumugi: He tried to reassure them by inviting them to play again... but Yamato-san seemed lonely as well…><
Yuki: Then he might feel lonely today too. They were attached to him and even held hands while playing
Takanashi Tsumugi: That might be the case...
Yuki: If that happens, I'll play with him
Takanashi Tsumugi: Yuki-san, you would...!?
Yuki: I'll practice calling him big bro Yamato while I’m at it
Takanashi Tsumugi:
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Yuki: I'm looking forward to his reaction
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bonnefeta · 5 months
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I recently saw a tiktok talking about which of the Fallout protagonists people most prefer, in light of the fact the Fallout show is coming out soon ish.
Perhaps unsurprisingly the most popular answer was the courier, which makes sense because New Vegas is a masterpiece, but also a lot of people talked about liking their backstory being less scripted.
Like compared to the lone wanderer or the sole survivor there isn’t like a cut scened backstory about your family or anything, the courier just pops up with a blank slate you can imagine however you want.
I totally get that, don’t get me wrong I love New Vegas, but having thought about it I do find the journey of the sole survivor and the lone wanderer effected me a lot more.
Especially the lone wanderer who I reckon is probably my favourite.
The characters I remember from New Vegas often have very little to do with my character. Like I remember the NPCs I met but the courier is basically just my eyes and ears, a much more blank slate.
With Fallout 3 I remember feeling gut punched by a lot of those moments, leaving the vault for the first time, finding your father and then loosing him, they really hit emotionally because I’m invested in the story of my player character.
But the main one I want to focus on is one of the moments I’ve found most impactful across all the games I’ve played,
Leaving the vault for the 2nd time.
Now not everyone might have done this quest, I’m pretty sure I missed it on my first playthrough, but if you haven’t ever done it you absolutely need too.
After your father dies if you return to Megaton you can pick up a distress frequency from the Vault where you hear Amata (your old bff and one of my favourite minor characters) asking for your help specifically. Something has gone wrong back home and you need to came back to fix it.
So you toddle off back home, and either help (or hinder) the vault get through a mini civil war. For the purposes of this post we’ll go with help.
So you save the vault, Amata is now in charge and everyone is safe and sound again, thanks to you. You’ve managed to save your home.
But you can’t stay.
Amata breaks the news to you that even after everything you’ve done there’s too much bad blood for you to stay. People blame you for the chaos, the change it’s brought. Amata can lead them into a better future but you can’t be at her side while it happens.
So you leave.
You walk out the vault door again, and as it closes behind you and you head back out into the wasteland you’re alone again.
The first time I played it (and honestly every time since) I was hit with such a strange grief. Like a hollow sad feeling I wasn’t expecting. Loosing your father is sad but this felt more impactful to me for some reason.
Maybe it’s the one-two punch of it, like lose your father and lose your home. But I for me it’s always reminds of the quote “you can never go home again” by Thomas Wolfe.
I don’t know exactly why this concept has always stuck with me, like it’s just stuck in my brain and it never really leaves. Maybe it’s from moving inter-state when I was a kid, and a few times since. But that idea of wishing to go back to a place where things were better, where you were happier, only to go there and realise it’s not how you remembered, and that you don’t belong any more, I guess it hits home.
You’ve been cast out into the wasteland, gone from your relatively comfortable and happy home into a world of violence and chaos and horror, only to lose your father. You fail, your defeated by the enclave, you’re starting again after a devastating setback, and when you’re at your lowest you get just a crumb of hope.
You get to go home, back to that place, but it’s not the same. Even when you ‘fix it’, you end the violence, there’s still no place for you there.
You just don’t fit any more.
And so you leave, you’re alone again. There’s no going back to when things were better, and the road ahead is more than hard, it’s probably impossible and even if you do succeed life will still probably never be easy.
But the vault door is sealed behind you, there’s no where to go but forward.
I know this is reading so deeply into a very minor side quest from a game from 15 years ago, but I honestly think it’s some of Bethesda’s best storytelling and kind of criminally overlooked in all the new Fallout talk.
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fanficsandfluff · 4 months
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Squealing Santa 2k23: All the Maybes in the World
Fandom: Peacemaker (DCEU)
Characters: Peacemaker (Christopher Smith), Vigilante (Adrian Chase)
A/N: Happy Holidays, @fluffy-lee-boa! It has been a hot minute since I've actually watched the show or seen Suicide Squad, but I sure did try my best. Peacemaker is a comfort character of mine, I love him to death, and I just want him to be happy.
Tried my best to take inspiration from your prompt: "Maybe Character A discovering he’s ticklish for the first time and wanting to bond with the Character B so they ask about it."
Thank you @squealing-santa for your organization and hosting another year of this fantastic tradition!
It's been a pleasure being able to provide you with your 2023 Squealing Santa fic!
"Is it bad?"
"No."
"Is it good?"
"If it wasn't bad, wouldn't you then assume it was automatically the opposite?"
"Is it cancer?"
"Adrian, what the fuck."
Christopher Smith pinched his temple between two fingers, letting out a very drawn-out sigh. When he came to his friend about his... well... discovery, let's put it, he had no idea how dense Adrian would be nor how difficult it was for him to actually explain himself.
"Well, you're not giving me the best clues, you know. You can make this clearer and stop beating around the bush if you just admitted you loved me," Adrian said in his oh-so-oblivious yet sincere way, pushing his glasses further up his face. This admission gave Christopher another reason to groan, this time into both hands that now shrouded his face.
"That's-That's not it, Adrian."
"Yeah, okay," Adrian scoffed.
Christopher finally looked up from his dejected position and furrowed his brow. Just come clean. Why was it so hard? He wanted to talk about it in the first place and now that the moment was here, he was too fucking embarrassed.
"Em did something to me that no one's done in a really, really long time and it was... surprising? It just--"
"Who's Em?"
Christopher turned his head to look at Adrian and gave him the benefit of the doubt, knowing the nickname had been pretty new to him and her, "Emilia, sorry."
"Who's Emilia?"
Benefit fucking obliterated.
"E-Emilia. You've worked with her for the past month."
"I have?"
"Harcourt--"
"Oh! Why didn't you just say so! Jesus, dude, here I am thinking Emilia was Eagly's other name or something."
Christopher was just about ready to walk out of his own goddamn trailer.
"So..." Adrian scooted a hair closer to Christopher on his buddy's couch, grinning, "What'd you two get up to?"
"She tickled me."
Adrian was still grinning, still nodding his head, tongue poking out like he was hearing some sick story about his best friend and teammate getting it on together, until, "Huh?"
"I know... I didn't know what was happening at first. And I just-- reacted! Then I shut down, she asked me about it, and pssh, I barely knew what the fuck I was feeling so I booked it out of there."
"Why'd you run away?"
"Because..." Christopher's mouth was fully ready to continue speaking, but his brain stopped him short. Why did he leave the situation so quickly? From what he'd heard about it, tickling wasn't too bad. But every part of his body wanted to flee the scene the moment it happened.
"Did Keith ever tickle you?"
In a rare moment of sincere clarity, Adrian hit the nail on the head with that unidentified trauma.
Of course. When the brothers would sneak around to avoid their father, the two would do anything they could to keep their spirits up. And that definitely included a tickle fight here or there, ones that young Christopher would lose more often than not. And if dad ever found them, he'd hurl the homophobic and incestual slurs. So, yeah, Chris never thought about that in a really, really long time. Until today. Until his fight or flight kicked in because of one stray touch along his ribs.
Christopher ended up nodding slowly after what he was sure was many moments of silence as he was taken back to decades ago. Adrian even let him have these moments, which was another big win for his character.
The realization dawned upon Adrian in a heartbeat later, and he was smiling wide, "You're ticklish?"
Chris felt an unfamiliar flush build in his cheeks and he glanced at his friend, "Yes, but don't get any ideas, Adrian, I swear to god."
"Wouldn't dream of it," not, "I just can't believe the Peacemaker is ticklish! Who would've guessed?" even Adrian let out a small, excited giggle.
"And you aren't? Why's it such a big deal? I bet you like it, too, you sick freak," even though Christopher came to Adrian to confess and get some advice about his predicament, he couldn't avoid hurling insults as his defense mechanism. Can't get too close now, remember.
"Oh, I do," Adrian thumbed his glasses again, nodding and possessing a very matter-of-fact look about him, "It's one of my favorite torture methods."
Chris made a face, knowing in that moment Adrian definitely meant to torture and to be tortured.
"What's there to like?" he asked more genuinely.
"It's so much fun, dude! The tingles, the nerve endings, the effortless laughter," Adrian was smiling just thinking about it, and Christopher was squirming at just the mention.
It was then, in basking in the beautiful memories of being involved in tickling, that Adrian reached out and pinched at Christopher's side without abandon. Chris shot off the couch completely, screaming a, "What the fuck!"
Adrian giggled with pure glee coursing through his body at the discovery his best friend laid out before him, "Stop fighting it!" he bolted off the couch and ran straight at Christopher.
They played a brief game of cat and mouse, Chris hurling every kind of insult at Adrian in his avoidance of the inevitable. The ever-determined Adrian wound up cornering Christopher in his bedroom, avoiding objects that were hurled at his head in the process.
"Go fuck yourself. Fuck you, fuck your mom, fuck your aunt--"
"What's Aunt Kathy got to do with this?"
"Well I know you don't have a sister, otherwise I would've banged her already, dipshit."
Adrian grinned disturbingly at the thought. He wouldn't want any part in that intimate affair, of course, but him being able to say that Peacemaker was his brother-in-law was too tempting to not daydream of.
Christopher was genuinely considering jumping out his window once he ran out of small throwable objects. That split second of decision cost him big, as Adrian roundhouse kicked him directly into his bed.
Knowing he had nowhere else to go, nothing else he could do to prevent this, Christopher threw up his hands, "Wait wait wait wait! Adrian, wait!"
"Yeah, buddy?" Adrian straddled Chris and rested his own hands on his hips just waiting for whatever his idol and friend was going to say to him.
Christopher shut his eyes and took a few deep breaths before continuing his thought, "This is still new for me... I'd appreciate it if you, you know..." he swallowed, "took it easy."
Adrian couldn't believe his ears. Had he already converted Christopher into being okay with tickling? Not fighting back as much as his traumatized brain probably wanted him to? Adrian now felt he had a duty to uphold. To take a step in reversing whatever repressed, fucked up memories and feelings Christopher had towards tickling.
"Of course, dude," Adrian assured. He wiggled his fingers in quick anticipation and softly touched down on Christopher's belly. He could feel his friend tense beneath him and watched Christopher's hands land on his own face to cover up.
"No anti-torture techniques now, Mr. Military Man," Adrian chastised.
Adrian did take notice of Christopher making himself more vulnerable by lifting his hands like he did. And the Vigilante was not one to turn down the opportunity, so he clawed at Peacemaker's ribs, not pressing in too hard at the behest of his friend.
Christopher's arms immediately shot down and squeezed to his sides as laughs huffed their way through. When Adrian vibrated his fingers more quickly, that amped up Christopher's laughter, the much larger man rocking from side to side.
"Awesome," Adrian had a smile a mile wide at this discovery, at seeing his best friend and idol laughing this carefree.
Adrian tested out a few more spots on Chris's upper body, all earning him a variety of laughs. When he'd had his fill of exploiting his friend's weakness, he unhooked his legs from atop Christopher and knelt beside him on the bed. Chris took in deep breaths to recover and was rubbing his hands along the parts of his torso that still felt tingly.
"That was so much fun," Adrian decided to pitch in his two cents, smiling broadly.
Christopher was still processing what just transpired. He did think he should be feeling way more self-conscious after being so vulnerable like that, laid bare with all his emotions and his body. But no, he was actually feeling pretty good. Like the tickling was a stress-reliever. He would never admit any of this, however, of fucking course not.
"Economos is gonna die when he hears about this," Adrian seemed to be still in his own little fantasy world post-tickling, giggling at the idea of their teammates face when he tells him of Peacemaker's weakness.
"Oh, fuck no. You're not selling me out to Economos! I trusted you, man!" Christopher, fully on the rebound, saw the glint in Adrian's eyes behind the kid's glasses and the anticipatory smile on his stupid face, and, well... don't look a gift horse in the mouth.
Adrian was squealing and laughing before Christopher even laid a finger on him. And yeah, it was clear to Christopher just how much Adrian enjoyed being tickled. Which was actually kinda cute.
And as Christopher was getting his footing being the giver of tickles, not the receiver, he was quickly seeing how much more he preferred this side of it. Doing the tickles. Being a younger sibling first, then only child, he was only ever on the receiving end or receiving nothing at all. Adrian must have been used to this kind of treatment being Gut Chase's kid brother, so maybe that's why it grew like it did within him.
Either way, Chris was fine taking pointers from Adrian on how to tickle him more effectively, which was all kids of fucked. And Adrian swore not to tell anyone else on the team about this. While Adrian and secrets was a ticking time bomb, Christopher knew he needed the time to fully anticipate what was to come. Maybe the team knowing wasn't a bad thing. Maybe he avoided the situation with Emilia too quickly. Maybe there was still a chance for him to feel more grounded day by day, surrounding himself with loving people and loving acts. Fuck, he was getting soft... and maybe soft wasn't a bad thing, either.
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mikesigninspection · 6 months
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I wanted to tell yall my opinion on "who would Mike first come out to".
Okay so I suspect that it might be El, Nancy or Karen. The reason why I choose these 3 is bc I feel like anyone else would make that coming out scene feel "too warm" (for exp. if he came out to Joyce).
Now ofc I believe that Mike will come out to Will during the confession but I feel like we need more, colder one? I am not saying that I need Mike to be unaccepted by anyone (thought that would be interesting to watch cause then they would show both sides of coming out) I am saying that I feel like if he comes out to these characters specifically, the whole scene is gonna feel more sad ( the vibe of it). Like when they do that blue/dark sort of coloring to express that this scene is supposed to make audience more sad than happy. It's hard to explain.
Alright.
El
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If MIke comes out to El, it would be on accident. It would probably happen in the middle of a fight where he would spill it out and El would be shocked. Tho, she wouldn't be very confused and surprised (at least from my point of view.) She probably caught up with Mike and Will's problems and she could see the reason for it but she is still not so sure or she is in denial. I just feel like she wouldn't be all that happy, she would prob. ask him to leave her to think abt this but would be very understanding at the end.
Nancy
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Now this is a different story. This is where he would come out when he prepared himself. Why do I feel like Nancy is one of those people? Not just bc she is his sister so it would make sense but smt else. Something about how they see each other.
Now, we all know that siblings fight constantly. Well most of siblings. And it isn't because they hate each other or something, it's mostly just siblings thing.
Ofc, Mike and Nancy also fight like other siblings do. However, their relationship is not the best. They often don't talk with each other. Hell, they would rather get hit by a car than talk about their feelings with each other like Jonathan and Will do.
So why do I believe that Nancy would be a good option?
It is simple. I believe that Mike thinks that Nancy is pretty neutral abt stuff. Maybe he thinks that she won't even care? He probably believes that her reaction to this wouldn't impact him that much since they don't talk. But there is also a part of him that hopes that she will understand and so is probably scared.
I feel like they might try to act like Will and Jonathan which is why they will try to talk to each other. Who knows?
Karen
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So we know how Karen wishes that her kids talk with her( like deep talks)? She has been waiting for that for a long time now. Mike coming out to her would be a thing that would fulfill her wish. And her reassurance would mean the world to him. It would make him braver and more emotionally stronger which will make Vecna's plan harder to proceed.
One thing that makes me believe in this theory is her talk with him in s1. If you are a straight viewer you may catch this message harder but if you are a queer person, you would notice.
Karen talking about how Mike doesn't have to hide anything from her, how he can tell her anything doesn't apply to Mike being upset abt Will going missing. It also doesn't apply to El bc she didn't know abt her yet.
Others know that Mike and Will's relationship is different from the others. However, not all of them think it has to do with romance. But Karen does. She can see the difference between how Mike acts with Will versus how he is with Lucas and Dustin.
Her speech in that episode means so much to queer community bc it represents a parent who is reassuring their closeted kid that no matter who they love, they are gonna stay and love their kid the same. And if they also have a hard time accepting it themselves, their parent is there to help them.
That is that.
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dangermousie · 10 months
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Farscape rewatch ep 2x09: Out of their Minds
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One of my faves and is a rare just plain hilarious ep which is just pretty wild and joyful, though even it manages to have that little heartbreaking moment with D’Argo and Pilot and it’s very on brand that logical talking solves nothing for Zhaan and she has to resort to violence.
But yeah, it’s a very hard ep to discuss, almost as hard to write about as it is fun to watch because what is there to analyze in a goofy, crazy ep where everyone switches bodies?
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Of course, it says something that for the Moya crew, switching bodies with each other while on a ship about to be blasted to pieces counts as a good day. In a way it’s parallel to S1’s ‘Through the Looking Glass:’ near death and craziness and off-kilter stuff with a happy ending and we know the angst is about to hit, with the Gammak base and torture. (The same happens in S3. After the lovely, hilarious LoMo ep, it’s all angst from there. S4 doesn’t have that as the whole thing is pretty grim).
Lots of caps and long so behind read more...
  I think OOTM is a wonderful acting ep: the actors must be having a blast and they are pulling off a really difficult feat, acting like each other, and they do it brilliantly. Ben Browder gets Rygel’s intonations down pat, Claudia Black’s imitation of Crichton’s guy mannerisms and the thumb to the mouth is awesome. And Anthony Simcoe’s body posture is spot-on Chiana.
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  Another thing I love about this ep is that reactions of the characters are so spot on about what they would do in other people’s bodies but most shows would never go there: Rygel in John’s body needing to use the facilities, John in Aeryn’s body ‘trying out the equipment’ (I love that scene) etc etc. And of course, this ep reconfirms that Moyans listen to John more than to anyone else. Zhaan refuses to follow the plan to change them all back, until she thinks it comes from John (in reality Rygel in John’s body). Though Rygel does show unexpected depths when he talks about revenge being his goal. We forget often that he is a former Dominar, but he is. Hmmm, what else. Zhaan once again proves compassionate but ruthless when necessary. The ending is awesome. One of the funniest, most perfect ones. Chiana and D’Argo finally deciding to get it on:
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Love D being bashful and Chi teasing and the dawning look of comprehension on John’s eyes as he watches him running after her. 
And ohhh, the sheer joy of the bit with John pretending to still be Rygel and then going ‘joke, Aeryn’ and she jumps on him and they wheel around the floor, laughing. So much giddy joy.
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But yes, as I mentioned I so love that when characters switch bodies, the show brings up the stuff shows normally do not but would totally happen. Like Rygel needing to pee while in Crichton’s body and having no idea how and Crichton (in Aeryn’s body) having to walk him through it. Hilarious but also no other show would go there.
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And the way the two of them get to play with each other’s bodies in a way neither probably thought they would. First we have Crichton in Aeryn’s body spellbound by boobs - they jiggle. Ahahahahaha. And then feeling them up as Aeryn in Rygel’s body watches irascibly. This show was WILD.
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And of course, they are equal in body curiousity as we see in one of the best tags ever. Crichton saying ‘You gotta walk a mile in someone’s shoes’ and Aeryn replying wryly that she knew what he was doing when he was in her shoes (feeling her up) and his grinning ‘give me a break’ and then her sly little comment that it’s OK ‘you were in my shoes, I was in your pants…’ and his laughing and running after her and just…joy.
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I always wondered what the status of their physical relationship before Look at the Princess was. I do think A Human Reaction was a one-off sex thing, but they do seem very comfortable with each other - I bet they are in the not saying or thinking anything on the conscious level (at least Aeryn is only subconsciously thinking about it; John is clearly way more attuned) but giddy stage and it’s so lovely...
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thatgirl4815 · 6 months
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The finale was really underwhelming, more than I thought. I didn't get the pool scene? Why did ray kiss boeing? also he seemed really into the kiss idk why the kiss was like that lol for example when sand kissed boeing you could see he wasn't into it. Sucks that boeing was involved in sandray's scenes i wanted more lovey dovey scenes from them. Idk overall it was meh i dont want a second season cuz I really dont care about the other couples specially topmew lmao
The pool scene caught me off guard too, especially because though I know Sand has a hard time saying no to Boeing, he just let that kiss happen. The way Sand kissed Boeing and then Ray was a pretty good indicator of where his heart truly lies, but Ray kind of blew that up when he initiated the kiss with Boeing; I think that was coming more from a place of anger that Sand kissed Boeing (even if he encouraged it), so Ray wanted to level the playing field It might've also been the showrunners' way of hinting at the threesome that everybody has been going on about. I took Ray's behavior as more aggressive than anything, and I don't think he genuinely wanted anything to do with Boeing there, he just wanted to get back at Sand somehow. Immature but very in-character. "You kiss your ex, I kiss your ex too."
The Boeing conflict resolution felt a little quick, and it ended up being relatively surface-level anyway. I just wish we'd gotten to see why Sand feels so strongly about this relationship after all this time. I understand a lot of that can be inferred, but that doesn't change the fact that it would hit a lot harder/be more understandable if the audience could feel it too. More showing, less telling.
I also have had a hard time with TopMew, because it's something I could like but I just...don't. It's just very dry to me. It doesn't help that the series often goes back and forth between their scenes and SandRay's, and SandRay's plot has always had more drama, more angst, and if I'm being honest--just more chemistry.
Overall, I liked where each of the couples ended up, but the execution was off at some points, which I'm mostly chalking up to time constraints. That could've been handled better. Also, BostonNick had some issues towards the end that I think needed to be addressed better. Still trying to get all my thoughts together on it.
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I've never seen the 'word of god' post from the author about Ava having had sexual experience. Unless it's the post where they state both A and N have had previous experience, in which case ignore this empty-headed clown.
But god does your post make me want to know more about your thoughts on this. If you're comfortable with doing so that is.
And your tags. Those hit hard. In my mind Ava would've been in the actual process of passing out until Nat swooped in and provided the visceral anchor she needs.
And you're so right in regards to Ava and men. The amount of trust and vulnerability for people like Ava to have for something like that... well, I'm now leaning towards her being a virgin as well.
And this ask definitely ran away from me I am so sorry lol
the way i was so afraid when i opened this ask and saw the Length lmfao
That is the post I was referring to!! I know it's either because Mishka doesn't want to bother with writing a 'first time' scene or just... because she's Straight and doesn't get how being demisexual works, but regardless I don't think it fits.
(granted, like I said, I would be inclined to believe Adam may have experimented over Ava)
Even from when A was still human, the thing about nobility is that they were often pretty closely monitored to make sure they weren't sleeping around. Women were especially monitored, so there's not much of a chance that Ava would have been able to find someone to hook up with casually, and even then, as a demisexual, she wouldn't have wanted to.
Overall, I just don't think it fits. She kind of slapped the demisexual label on them but then didn't care to like actually follow through on what that would mean for them. Suppose she'd probably also see being a 900 year old virgin as something shameful or embarrassing, but again, as someone who is demisexual, it's really easy to just not have sex. lmfao.
Ava in particular is so repressed that she probably has not really explored or even acknowledged the fact that she finds women attractive. She grew up in a time that that would have been severely frowned upon, and I don't see her taking the time to think about it, especially since being demisexual kind of requires an emotional connection before you want to have sex with someone.
Obviously, Mishka wasn't going to write a special response from Ava for a fem detective, nor was she going to do that for Adam and a masc detective, but it would have been interesting to see the extra layer of surprise/turmoil that would likely come to A when they realize that they have feelings for someone.
I have other feelings about Ava in particular because I am a lesbian and I love butches and I have opinions about how she would be in the bedroom but that's neither here nor there.
ANYWAY YES i hope this is sufficient?? lol??
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mybg3notebook · 9 months
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I know you have not uploaded in several years and might not even see this, but I wanted to say thank you SO much for your amazing explorations of Gale. He is a very complex and often misunderstood character and I think your meta posts on him hit the mark perfectly. If the spark arises I hope you will return after the full release :) Thank you again for all your wonderful posts! Have a nice day!
Hello!
Thank you very much. I am still around, it's simply work and other games have got my attention, and after playing EA so many times, I am already burnt out to the bones. I am also deeply disappointed with Larian's latest changes.
Hopefully, after release, I will continue with more analysis if the game is worthy of that. Unfortunately, I'm not sure how well these analysis of Gale will hold with the apparent rewrite of his character. If the new description of him ends up being true and it's not a terrible lie to the player, since nothing of that was shown or hinted in EA, these analysis will fall apart. In fact, if he ends up being another boring, overused, cliche wizard who wants power because he wants to be the biggest wizard of Toril :rolling eyes:.... I may lose any interest in him. All what made him interesting and a bit "original" within the context of Forgotten Realms has been erased completely with that new description.
I'm also disappointed with Larian in general, because it's obvious their two fave chars are forced through the player's throat like Liara was in Bioware's case. You don't care about them? It doesn't matter, they will always take priority in conversation and scenes, they will be key in showing another side of the main plot (as it was Fane in DOS2) and the rest of the companions become secondary or forgettable.
And Karlach's final face is a horror. It's a variation of Shadowheart's face, a barby-Karlach, because clearly Larian feeds bro gamers who want yet another doll-faced woman. I find annoying that nobody complained for this change: her first potential face (not the placeholder), with half face burnt and scarred, hard eyes, and a longer and pronounced nose, was the face of a warrior who went to hell and back... now you have the baby-doll face, Red!Shadowheart, almost, lol. It's a bit unsettling. It reminds me when Larian made their big-boobs lizard women in DOS1.
At least they did what I thought it was a must: to truly write Wyll, because that char was inconsistent, lacked of depth in comparison with the rest of the other companions, and was, basically, a future Beast (dos2) in BG3. That's why I didn't even bother to write a general overall analysis of his character. I suspected he had to be written at some point because it's was a cardboard character in there, just there to be your black char token. You know, the black char we add to a game so we look "progressive" but still has bad development as a char or it's simply shallow when compared with the depth of the other chars. Pretty much like Larian does with their lgbt representation too.
Larian's lgbt representation also bothers me. It is mostly hidden in books and lines of text in this world (yes, yes, Astarion is the only char shown and written lgbt openly, but the rest of the world has no lgbt integrated chars, or the few two couples we saw in EA are unhealthy and horrible-the gnome lesbian-or absolutely hidden in one single line that, if you miss it, you can confuse them as brothers -the husband gnomes-). We can have a long discussion about how Larian does playersexual characters that are not any representation of lgbt, because they are not written like bi but hetero, and their "bisexuality" only appears when you romance them (and this was done in DOS2 too, with barely a line or two hidden in Lohse's origin to show some potential, little bi inclination). It's so strong how they write their characters as hetero, that even in several parts of the romances of DOS2 you have descriptions where it shows that the default was clearly "man tall and woman smaller", even when in DOS2 world that may not apply to some hetero couples (elves and lizards). But all this discussion about playersexuality is a long one I'm not even sure the fandom can have at this point. I wish to be wrong and see more lgbt characters naturally integrated to the world, and not reduced to short stories in books or to whom you romance with your Tav. But I doubt it. Larian follows the masses. And Masses care nothing about this. Thank you for the ask, and have a nice day too!
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m34gs · 6 months
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Rollo Flamme in the TWST Saw AU: Victim or rival apprentice? (can imagine him in a trap after the events of GloMas)
Alrighty, time to answer this ask! Thank you for your patience, anon, I just finished the Glorious Masquerade on Sunday! I talked with @kimium (co-creator of the Saw AU; see her fics here) and we had a good discussion about Rollo!
So, what we know about Rollo is that his actions were fuelled by his despair, anger, grief, and survivor's guilt surrounding the death of his younger brother. But, part of him doesn't want to believe what he is doing is wrong. He has twisted his own morals to justify trying to rid the world of magic for the good of others. You could even say, because of the way he is so desperate to convince himself that he's doing the right thing, that he is doing this *because* he values life. He's a complex and interesting side-character and it's fun to discuss him. I think, if he was in the main story, he also would have been one of the overblots...which makes this an interesting case.
That brings me to what Kim and I came to as a conclusion. Rollo is not an apprentice, neither is he a trap victim. Not because he is somehow right; no. Not because the Housewardens don't care; Malleus in particular wants to chuck him in a trap. It's a mix of things keeping Rollo "safe":
Division of the Housewardens. While they are all independent apprentices, Kim and I have established with each other that there are times where they work together, make agreements, and set guidelines/rules together for themselves to follow. When playing through the event, the Housewardens at Fleur City had mixed feelings about what Rollo did. While they all did work together to stop him, Idia in particular felt a connection to him. I mean, how often is it that someone else's diary gets Idia Shroud to *willingly* climb stairs? I'm certain it hit really close to home for him, and I think it would make him hesitate to put Rollo in a trap; because it would be very personal. Azul probably would weigh pros and cons of putting Rollo in the trap, so that will depend on his use to Azul. Riddle might want to put him in a trap, but he would probably consult Jigsaw first at the very least. What about the Housewardens not present at the scene? Well, we've already established Kalim doesn't like putting people in traps to begin with (and he'd probably fight with Jamil over trapping Rollo if it came down to it). Leona would find Rollo annoying, but if the problem's been dealt with he isn't about to waste his time and energy going after him. Vil is one of the most compassionate Housewardens in my mind; he is another we've established does not enjoy putting people in traps if he doesn't feel he has to. What about Malleus? He has fae powers, right? And we've established that he more or less follows John's rules out of courtesy and not because he is afraid of breaking them. That kind of brings us to the next points.
No Actual Harm Befell Yuu. We've established that the Housewardens, especially Malleus, will consider throwing anyone in a trap if they've harmed Yuu (though there are some times where they don't think traps are appropriate or are too easy a punishment, they still consider it). Aside from dropping the floor out from under Yuu (where they were saved by Professor Trein), Rollo didn't actually try to do anything to Yuu directly. The firelotuses don't affect Yuu since they have no magic. If anything happened to Yuu, it would have been collateral damage, but I would argue that he might have been trying hard not to harm Yuu (or anyone without magic); based on the discussions he had with them where he was pretty much trying to feel out whether they thought magic was evil as he did. There was potential for harm, and some would argue that's enough, but you wouldn't find all of them convinced.
Yuu Knows Rollo. This isn't some asshole in the street who they'll probably forget in a month or two. They know Rollo personally. They've talked to him at length. They may not be a fan of what he did, but they have been through something similar with each of the Housewardens and showed a remarkable ability to understand and make peace with people. It is reasonable to assume they could do the same with Rollo. If he ended up dying in a gruesome manner from a trap they would probably be sad. None of the Housewardens want to make Yuu sad. (Note: I have hinted before that Jigsaw would have put the Housewardens, and potentially their dorm mates, through traps too; this is different. The assumption is John did not know Yuu at the time. He knew of them but had not met them. He did not know what a sin it was To Make Yuu Sad. He also did not ever have a Housewarden trap another Housewarden; he did those ones himself. John eventually tries to make up for risking Yuu's sadness when he trapped the Housewardens by finding ways to make Yuu happy and allowing the Housewardens a looser leash when it comes to people who harm/disturb Yuu).
Potentially the strongest argument we have: The Gargoyle's Promise. In the event, when the gargoyle is losing its ability to move and speak, it tells Malleus, Idia, and Azul, to take care of Rollo. Look me in the eye and tell me Malleus will break that promise ever. Look me in the eyes. and Tell Me. He would never break his oath to a talking gargoyle. Even though he desperately wants to. He really wants to. He thinks about it every time he sees Rollo get too close to Yuu or give them presents (my little headcanon; I like to think Rollo tries to befriend Yuu and maybe even win them over). But the Gargoyle's promise is a powerful thing. It would take even more extreme acts to get him to consider breaking it. For now, Malleus just grumbles like a disgruntled housecat who has seen another cat sit on the sidewalk across the street, from his favourite vantage point in the window.
So, Rollo is safe for a few complex reasons! (That doesn't mean Malleus isn't watching him like a hawk though. He is. He definitely is.)
Of course, this is just what we've decided for our Saw AU; if you want to test Rollo through a trap or think he would make a good apprentice, I highly encourage you to build that AU as you see fit and have fun with it!
Thank you again for sending this ask, it was fun to discuss and answer! I liked it :D feel free to send more if you ever feel inclined; and feel free to send asks about this au to @kimium as well! Also, Kim, if you have anything further to add from what we've discussed, please do!
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pancake-breakfast · 9 months
Text
It might be a bit of a stretch for me to finish Volume 7 before the clock hits midnight on Sunday, but hey, I'll give it a shot.
Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 7, Chapters 3-4 below.
Chapter 3: King of Loneliness
CW: Body Horror
You know, as much as I want to say this title absolutely, most definitely applies to Vash, it might apply to Wolfwood. Or to Knives. At least Vash and Wolfwood have friends along the way. At least they have each other.
Dude. Conrad opposed the experiments? Maybe I was being too harsh with him in my last notes.
It can be hard to know when to have difficult conversations like this with kids. I'm sure that was only further complicated by them being hyper-intelligent, extra-powerful plant babies. But kids are often better at understanding these things than we think they are.
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Well, at least Knives admits he's putting up a face here. And he's still young enough that Rem can peel it off. I'm glad he got to cry to her, even for a bit. Even if he rejects her comfort on the very next page and puts the mask right back on.
Now he's starting to look more like the Knives we know.
Ohhh, now he's straight up looking like the Knives in Vash's memories.
They do look pretty happy here, though. I mean, they even fall asleep all next to each other.
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Ugh, Baby Knives is not doing well.
He looks too much like Adult Knives here. It's uncanny.
Face stained with blood and tears and twisted in fear, and then blackness. Great composition.
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And there he is, celebrating his victory, the ships raining down around like falling stars.
Vash calls him out, but Knives isn't anywhere near ready to admit the truth of his statement. Ironically, he's to scared to admit he's scared.
"This is not fear. This is anger." Ohhhhh, man. I could go on about that from my own experience. Let's just say that a lot of times, those who have spent a lot of time afraid learn to mask it as anger, since anger allows a level of action that fear often does not.
Oooh, she's got some mandible action going on here. Also, not sure, but I don't think she's quite happy about this situation....
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Stuff going fwakoom?
Betcha Bagworm Legato is super-jealous of Elandira's ability to run to Knives' side right now.
Alright, that looks both very cool and very uncomfortable. Like, physically, it looks like it would at least be awkward, if not painful.
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Oh, yeah. Plant girl isn't happy about this at all. That is not a happy face. But since when has Knives cared about someone else's happiness compared to his own purposes? It's... it's been a long, long time.
He has a double angel arm now? Cool, cool. I'm sure that won't be a problem or anything....
Yeah, definitely thinking the chapter title is referring to Knives at this point.
Chapter 4: Bastards and the Blues
This cover picture of Knives is somehow simultaneously slutty and immensely disturbing.
Ha! It's the rubber band scene! Vash needs this.
Look at that. It's an old-timey mob, here for an old-timey hangin'.
Awww, I know we've just met him, but I feel like Hancock really doesn't deserve all this.
As if there was any doubt what Vash would do in this situation.
Ok, so... I could be wrong here, but this all feels off. Vash is doing Vash things, but he seems waaaaaay too openly depressed while doing them. It's like he's doing them because Wolfwood is standing there expecting him to do them. He's going through the motions (which, to be fair, is a legitimate tactic to get through depression for some), but his heart isn't in it.
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Yyyyyeah, hearing people scream about his inhumanity is probably not gonna help things.
At... at least he made two friends out of it? At least this time everyone backed down immediately? But Vash doesn't want people to live in fear of him like that.
Wolfwood playing lookout at the door.
If these guys turn out to be serial rapist baby snatchers or something, I'm going to burn down this whole manga. Vash needs a break. It doesn't need to be a big one.
Gods, his fake smiles are baaaaad here. He's not even trying to hide. He's just smiling 'cause he doesn't know what else to do.
Not sure how I feel about Vash getting drunk again, even if there's a spirit of camaraderie in this instance. I feel like Wolfwood, the actual heavy drinker here, feels the same. It's notable he's staying dry for this one.
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Granny here seems chill. Like she's seen enough things in her life to no longer have time for anything but kindness, even if the best she can do is the small kindness of booze.
OMG GENUINE WOLFWOOD PEACEFUL SMILE I SHALL TREASURE IT FOREVER
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Actually, these seem like good people for Vash to talk to right now. Sure, neither of them leveled a city (probably), but One-Eye at least has a deep understanding of what it is to be haunted by deep regrets.
WHYYYYY is the alcohol called Blades?!?!
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But... Vash doesn't want to be alone. And neither does this guy, for that matter, or he wouldn't have Handcock around. And Vash... he may be running and sad and hiding... but he's not alone this time, either.
Ugh, drunk and depressed Vash is in no shape to fight.
Wolfwood might be indulging a bit now, but he knows he's the designated driver here, and he's being careful enough to make sure he can keep an eye on Vash.
I like how the tails on Vash's jacket get longer when Nightow wants them to look particularly dramatic. These are beautiful, but if they were actually that long, he'd be tripping over them as they dragged through the sand.
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Also, flashy light is probably Bad.
Guess they're screwed.
The loss of communication would be really bad. It's always bad in times of conflict. Quick and reliable (or even semi-reliable) communication can win wars... and here I'm guessing Knives decided to take the upper hand for his first declaration of open conflict.
Yyyyyeeeeeaaaahhhh, Knives, honey, that doesn't look healthy....
What's that, Elandira? Were you secretly kinda hoping you'd somehow make it all the way through Knives' pending genocide?
Man, Vash sure can sober up fast.
There we go. Babygirl does genuinely look better here. Like, he's still sad, but he's not lying. He's genuinely grateful for this.
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Good, I'm glad they got a bit of a break.
Archive
Trigun Vol. 1: Covers + 1-3, 4, 5-6, 7-8, 9-10 || Vol. 2: Covers + Extras, 1, 2-4, 5-6, 7-8
TriMax Vol. 1: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 2: Covers + 1, 2-4, 5, 6-7 || Vol. 3: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-7 || Vol. 4: Covers + 1-2, 3-5, 6-7 || Vol. 5: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 6: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 7: Covers + 1-2
Extra Credit: Trigun Vol. 1: Nebraska vs. Vash's Motivations, Vash's Loneliness, Vash's Depression (pt 2 of post), Soupy Brains || Vol. 2: Coin Factoids || TriMax Vol. 1: Lina, Vash, and a Haircut || Meryl, Vash, and the Pursuit of Happiness || Vol. 5: Knives, Vash, and Hatred for Humanity || Vol. 6: Coping Series: Wolfwood, Meryl, Vash
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