#4 years of look what you made me do

[ducktracy]

compilation of my villagers bullying me. this will be a growing collection. these are all from today alone.

#‘but Eliza didn’t you start a new Wild World town on an emulator’ Yes #i’ve had this town for 4 years which is the best i’ve ever done LOL but my cartridge is showing its age and freezing and i don’t #feel like getting yelled at Resetti. but i dislike the controls for the ROM especially since my keyboard is weird #so we’ll make do. somehow #Purrl in my GC town was dumb like Purrl in my WW town i’m pretty sure i did a reset trick and cheated her in LOL #DUMB LUCK #which is what i’m vowing to stop doing by starting all these towns #‘don’t cheat or constantly delete your town to get good villagers’ is like the most basic thing you can do but my AC #perfectionism and neuroticism runs very deeply #when i was a kid if i got a villager i hated i would delete the town without question and would refuse to look at the screen. i hated Cesar #and Boone for this reason and them moving into my town is the worst thing that ever could have happened to me and it happened many times #because i was a RESETTING FOOL!!! #i love you deeply Animal Crossing but you have made me foster some incredibly odd neuroses #ac

[anxiously-sidequesting]

So I once made a funny shit post about the Young Wizard actually beaming to the Spiral at the tender age of 45 but it got me thinking of the opposite. What if the Wizard was incredibly young

Since in the game it isn't specified at what exact age we arrived in the Spiral I think it's just up to the player to come up with that part. I personally like to think The Wizard was around 7 or 8 when this happened but what if they were actually like four or five years old

Like shieeeet that's young enough where we wouldn't really remember our time on Earth very clearly right? Our family and maybe our friends but unless we had like ungodly memory powers, we wouldn't be able to remember all of the details of our original home. Like isn't it proven that human beings first gain self and special awareness at 3 or 4? Something like that

And this can open up for some sweet scenarios - little kid Wizard running up to Malorn with a scribbled drawing of him with a big smile on his face, or us and Ceren reading picture books together or clinging onto Nolan's robes as we attempt to stand on his feet as he walks like a penguin, but there's also this sad and messed up undertone that in this universe Ambrose took what was essentially a child just out of toddler stage and decided to keep them in the Spiral instead of returning them to their family

And like imagine how that would affect us. We would see it as normal at first because we grew up in the Spiral, we spent more years in the wizard world than in our home on Earth, but what if the Wizard gained awareness later on in life and actually realized what happened. Would they even care at that point because the Spiral was integrated in them at such a young age? Would they feel any yearning towards their original family, would they miss them at all? Would the Wizard be bitter about not getting to know them?

It's different when you're 7 - 10 and onwards because at that stage in your life you've more than gotten used to Earth life. You've gained awareness and it has been emotionally and mentally established that THIS (Earth) is your home. You know your parents and you know your friends and you know your environment. You will miss that when it's gone and feel it's absence because you're old enough to at least notice when you're taken away from it. But when you're still at that impressionable and oblivious stage of like 4 - 6 years old? The Spiral is all you know now. Your parents faces will be blurry, you may not even remember the details of what your home looked like. You may remember certain smells, colors or feelings you experienced when you were on Earth but that may be about it. And the saddest part about that is depending on what Ambrose and the other adults put our Wizard through, we may grow to completely forget even those essential memories. That Earth part of us would TOTALLY be gone and that would include even our parents (or other caretakers). I'm crying actually

#this was supposed to be a happy post LMFAO #i wanted to make little kid/familial relationships headcanons with the wizard city student npcs. maybe ill still do that #i can see even nolan taking us under his wing and hyping us up and going “WOW thats so pretty!!!” at a drawing we made #penny dreadful would be the best older sister. by accident of course bc she wasnt looking to adopt but she saw us- #-one day and was like ''yeah. yeah they can be my family'' #imagine us being one of the highlights in malorns day. after a hard day of work he just sees this little kid- #-running up ro him just so happy to see him for no reason. they hug his waist and then tell him about their day #duncan grimwater shenanigans. ''ew i dont want this child near me'' (is nice to them anyway bc theyre 4) #villains when they see a toddler has come to kill them: 🧐 #even malistaire goes ''what the fuck is this you want me to beat up a child??? ambrose???????'' #we're 8 years old when we face off morganthe in zafaria #thats so fucking funny morganthe would be APPALLED #and you bitches KNOW grandfather spider would adopt us IMMEDIATELY #''good job son (gender neutral)!'' grandfather spider says as we beat him the fuck up in mirage #wizard101 #w101 #wiz101 #text posts

[benveydraws]

putting these pages together for no particular reason

#(so i could come back to it later and think of an art idea) #SORRY i need to talk about stuff because aaaaa. ill make a side blog at some point i promise #i know the obvious parallel is ch2 and ch25 when yashiro was crying #especially if you look at it from doumeki's perspective with all his guilt and fear of becoming like his father #but if you shift the perspective to aoi and yashiro then these two work as well #both of them are so resigned to their suffering at this point and don't expect any help but doumeki shows up anyway #even if it was pure chance with aoi he still “saved” her and she tells him that she's able to do what she loves now because of him #and doumeki obviously couldn't have done anything to help yashiro when he was a child. but at least he saved him from hirata #which isn't even about hirata as a person #it's about hirata as this walking manifestation of violent homophobia and a way for yashiro to go through with his suicidal ideations #also. doumeki going to jail for 4 years in aoi's case and him being “forgotten” for 4 years in yashiro's. #he didn't even get to hear yashiro's “you saved me” because he was unconcious. and with aoi he was so focused on his guilt #that he probably didn't think about it this way either. no wonder “your sister was lucky she had you” made him cry #and no wonder he's so bitter and hurt post-time skip #oh doumeki chikara you sure are one of the characters ever (affectionate AND derogatory)

[crossbackpoke-check]

Hello, im wehaveagathering from my main blog, im kind of obsessed with your hockey poetry edits and I think your blog is great! I guess I kind of have a dumb question, where do you find the images you use for your edits? Did you say Getty in your tags?? I’ve gotten into making icons recently (and i have ideas for poetry edits hrrrghhh) but it’s hard to find high res images. Thanks for your time and I hope you have a nice day :)

first of all thank you so much 🥹 and second that’s absolutely not a dumb question!! i do pull a lot of images from getty and i’ll also download pictures from sports articles (i got a lot of the hugheses pictures from online access articles, for example), or sometimes from instagram/facebook/twitter if an account is public. freely admitting that i am not technologically advanced? inclined? in the slightest here, but the image editing software that you use and how you import/export photos with it makes a difference in the quality of them as well!

if you haven’t seen them yet, i would also recommend checking out @simmyfrobby @national-hockey-lesbian @hauntedppgpaints @tapedsleeves @starscelly and @captainbradmarchand’s blogs just off the top of my head!!! they might know more places to get high res images and also i love their work 💕🫶

#sorry can’t type hands all butterfly hearts i’m just out here like 🥰🥰🥰🥹🥹🥹😭😭😭💕💕💕 #@ everyone i tagged ty i love you i hope you don’t mind the tag 😘 also i KNOW i am unintentionally forgetting people so tag them at will #forgive me i am eepy. we are running on <4 hours of sleep and over 18 hours awake 🫡 #liv in the replies #join the club!!! join the club!!!!! we love the hockey poetry edits!!!!!! i’m so excited to see what you create!!!!! :))))) #the process of me finding images is very much like. either i have a vision in my head and i troll getty looking for it or my screenshots #if i know i have one l m a o but either way i am always 68 pages deep in a hyper specific search labeling my photos like ‘ohHHH buddy’ #‘menace 1 abd 2’ ‘but he’s not a cup winner’ ‘ohhhh the nolpat media scrums are rich earth’ #‘because WILLY WON’T CUT HIS HAIR’ ‘deJA FUCKIN MILK BAYBE’ ‘is it truly sn edit if u don’t find a devastating baby pic’ ‘yes MF last line’ #and so forth. like. glad it’s comprehensible to ME but if anyone else ever tried to use these photos based on file name alone i am so sorry #also i forget that y’all can’t see all of the metadata notes on photos to know where they’re from :/ i gotta be better abt making it clear #also on the note about image quality i just need to state for the record i am so photoshop whatever illiterate. #i learn one (1) new trick on GIMP a year maybe two if i am lucky & no i have never figured out consistent sizing 🫡 but the one hack for res #i HAVE figured out is that when i do edits i usually make a whole doc w/the poem lined up on it (helps me keep somewhat consistent sizing) #and then i export that document as a pdf and edit the pdf in the software instead of trying to screencap or jpeg or anything. PDF quality > #that is probably so convoluted lol if anyone has tips please lmk i am always learning #ANYWAY. rambling u did not ask for but is inherent to Me. #have a great day too!!!!! you literally made mine so 💕😭 #wehaveagathering #indecisor

[twilightarcade]

me vs integration

#wordstag #anyway ramble post 4 the night have been doing more like?????? Whatsitcalled #not shapes n stuff but like. The look. You knwo. Colors n stuff. Been doing more practice with that as of late #which is fun! I enjoy it! But also there's like a . Horrid divide going on here between my realism* pieces #& my heavily stylized pieces . Looks over at my ocs. And I REALLY want to bridge said gap #But I have been struggling SOOOOO hard you have no clue. Guy who's beating the shit out of me #I think the solution is going from realism then stylizing it down. Like relearn everything #which is what I'm inevitably going to have to do I think. But by cod if I'm not going to whine about it #whatever I whine about everything. I'm like if there was a guy and he whined. #anyway what else is going down in Neptune's life. My mom made curry like. A bit ago. #it was pretty good 👍 #rereading it this post sounds like smthn a politician would make. I WILL UNINTEGRATE SCHOOLS!!! VOTE ME !!!! #whhat ever I'm trusting you 2 not read it like that . #I drawk like so much water also. I'm hydrated man. #mmy acquaintances birthday is coming up and I don't know what 2 get her. I don't know if she even wants anything really #that just feels awfully cruel thoug #I would loooove 2 paint her something but also I haven't painted in like 842781 years and don't have paints. Nor a canvas. Really unprepare #4 that one; are we? #mmaybe I can try. Trhiugh the power of love anything is possible and such

[darewolfcreates]

Copper and silver ring I made :]

pre-soldered and rounded version under cut:

wimgs :]

#their not as easy to read as wings when bent and in photo form... #also yes i nicked the silver a bit... but its finne!! #im very happy with how it turned out :] and it fits perfectly! #we were given 1 long strip of silver incase we messed up and needed to make a second ring but i didnt use the other half of the silver and #still have it sitting around... idk what im gonna do with it... #melt it down and use it on one of my swords to make it better at fighting wearwolves /j #my art #artists on tumblr #silver #copper #metalsmithing #jewlery #ring #wings #wing #you will be seeing that sketch in the background of the last pic eventolly... im scanning all my sketchbooks from the year rn an its taken #me 4 days so far... i have just the 2 notebooks left out of 10 books in total. #3d art #again art looks like it got soaked in an oil spill becuse its glazed to protect from ai theft. thankf for understanding :] #cant wait to share with yall the junk i made in blacksmithing... #its not impresive by my standards but i had fun makeing it! my grandma also said that if my uncle doesent want it that he will be leaveing #me his fordge in his will so maby some day theres a chance i might get to do blacksmithign again :] #i whould like that... it was so fun... #also branded myself several times... but thats besides the point!

[lucy-ghoul]

I just realized what's wrong with the Targaryen wigs in HotD: they don't look like Targaryen hair, they look like they were stolen from the Malfoys. They all share one (1) or at best two wigs in toto and it makes them look like freaking Lucius Malfoy clones

#jokes aside episode 1 was quite good (yes i finally caved in and started watching the fire lizards show) #there were many nice touches that made me go 'mmmmh good stuff.' #1. the juxtaposition of aemma's horrific death in childbirth/the knights killing each other at the tournament #clearly reminiscent of that quote from one of brienne's chapters... heh now i can't fully remember it in english #2. THEY NAME-DROPPED THE SONG OF ICE AND FIRE (which was never even remotely referred to in got) #the whole thing about aegon and the prophecy has been a particularly favorite fan theory of mine for years and i'm happy it's canon #fake lizard monarchs haters gonna hate :)) #tho it's VERY bittersweet considering the got finale... like the prince that was promised was *spins roulette* #a stark all along? like randomly? (and no obviously i'm not talking about jon. he *is* half targaryen after all) #and let's not forget about the true heir being put down like a mad bitch because d&d liked jon better (since he's a man) #and were like 'revolutionary who wants to help people/actually abolished slavery in another continent bad. let's enforce the status quo :))) #(also the double standards. war crimes are okay only if other nobles do it - especially the starks. if you have a dragon and are a woman #and dare to be slightly mortally grey and/or ambitious... in 2 days you're gonna burn children alive!! because ofc.) #..... *cough cough* okay salty rant is over. let's go on with val's hotd first impressions #2. i didn't hate matt smith as daemon and he's particularly good at looking upset and/or sad but i still think he was miscast #3* #like he CAN act and it shows. but it's as if he were making an effort to appear more believable for this role #idk maybe he'll grow on me in the next eps. also his interactions with rhaenyra were a++ but that's nothing new #can't wait for this girl to fuck her uncle ig (...... what did i become skskksks) #4. i also liked rhaenyra&alicent's interactions. this is gonna be another tragic former besties to worsties for me to cry on :((( #5. i mostly liked the costumes. i liked how this is all about the patriarchy (at least so far). i liked the slight but still noticeable #references to the main show (the music. rhaenyra being an obvious dany lookalike. #lord stark pledging his fealty to her while viserys' voice over is speaking about the threat in the north. #viserys telling her 'promise me rhaenyra. promise me' in what i believe is an echo of lyanna's last words to ned... i think? #like it can't be accidental) #god i missed being excited over this stupid and gorgeous series #obv it helps that i actually never read fire&blood (should i?) and i'm only familiar with the events/characters from twoiaf #house of the dragon #val speaks #txt

[mejomonster]

I need one of those guides that's like how to date as an adult with the presumption the reader knows Nothing not even like first grade asking out fake crushes info

#rant #i havent dated in years and im demi so i was never good at that shit anyway since itll take months or more to get a crush #i need a guide thats like Every single tiny step like idk #1 download x app or go to y public spaces #2 try looking for ppl with Z qualities #maybe make a list of Z compatible qualities first then look #3 message people with those qualiries THESE starter topics #4 try to go on an in person date soon by asking them #(or vice versa. talk for montjs before a date to see if u can even crush potentially which was a friends tip once) #5 at the date try to do X honest things and topics #remember to smile? or hug? some flirt suggestions if you dont know how and arent gping to kiss #6 what to say upfront (like idk im demi want no kids) versus what to not bring up immediately (idk?) #ive looked up advice for like individual numbers i just listed lmao #and the AMOUNT of full on conflicting advice!!! made me so anxious i had to stop #itd be like: YES say youre looking to date seriouslt for marriage cause other person may not want it #and better to both know sooner. vetsus NO leave mystery dont scare ppl with assumptions on what you #expect before u even know them! and its like???!! well a human simply CANNOT follow both of those advices at once #and id get anxious i couldnt follow ALL advice and cpuldnt guess which was right or wrong advice so id stress. #i will say generally good advice (tho very basic is): communicate honestly and more is better than less if unsure #have fun and be yourself cause you should enjoy it and if they like u then you want them to like the real you. #and look for red flags of cruel behavior (in which case LEAVE) and just general inxompatibility #(a person could be a great Friend but if theyre poly with 3 long term lovers and ur very much Not poly u should #probably JUST be friends. or if your friend is straight and ur gay. or ur crush wants to move to alaska soon #and u never ever wanna go there. just like. not bad things. just incompatible things) #but also im a little fool in the complexities and i still NEED lists for specific steps #i havent had a crush in years god -.-

[im-like-if-a-girl]

That one posts that's about the loneliness of young adulthood... yeah. I wish I knew my purpose, what I'm supposed to do, who I'm supposed to be.

#sometimes i wish i were 11 years old again surrounded by friends without a care in the world #but im 18 and a half and feeling lost and hopeless. #i should really go to sleep. that will make me feel better. #college didnt work. i didnt make any friends. and of those i only hung out with them 4 times max throughout the whole year. #4 times. even less. #i didnt put myself out there. i made excuses. no time. too late. have to study. have to do work. #it was so isolating. #and now school is ending and what do i have to show for it? #an average report card and depression. #i was doing better when i was on vacation. i had fun. i enjoyed living. #now that im back the world is hitting me. snap back to reality. and reality sucks. #still unemployed but i guess i didnt look hard enough for jobs after applying to 7 and getting rejected from them all. #maybe i should make an onlyfans and sell pictures of my feet lol. theres always a market for that. #yeah i should really go to bed. ill feel better in the morning. if youve read this far i love you. dont worry about me. goodnight.

[swagging-back-to]

really, in this day in age if you refuse to release your movie for streaming youre actual shit and it tells me that your movie is ALSO shit.

#i was SO excited for quiet place 2 to come out. #i waited and had it on my calender #and then they indefinitely cancelled it until after the pandemic. #because 'you have to see this movie in theaters. it was made to be seen in theaters' #spoilers if you havent watched it yet... the movie was shit. it was a dumpsterfire. it crashed and burned in ways unimaginable #i dont think a single person liked that movie. #everything from the plot to the characters was senseless and infuriatingly annoying #soooo the fact that james cameron is refusing to release avatar 2 for streaming for at least another half year.... #my expectations are in the dirt. #they already were after it took 13 fucking years to be made #13 years in development doesnt tell me 'this movie will be great'it tells me ' these people have no fuxking idea what theyre doing' #especially when the first one took 5 years to make and was released in 2009. #it took 5 years to make avatar one in 2000 FUCKING 4. #and yet he couldnt even have half the movie finished in the 2010s? #avatar 3 4 and 5 are all finished. they were finished (shooting and editing) YEARS before he even began avatar 2 #that tells me theres GROUNDBREAKINGLY horrible time management going on behind the scenes #and honestly from the clips ive seen from the movie it really doesnt look that good #they copied almost all of the first movie right down to exact freezephrames that are the same. #they were so lazy they COULDNT EVEN COME UP WITH ORIGINAL PLOTPOINTS AND DIALOGUE IN O V E R A D E C A D E.

[gudakko]

wait right i did have another dream

#why do i suddenly remember them only after a few hours #anyway this was from the afternoon nap not the new years sleep that was the bird girl #but yeah i went to my old highschool and usually thats never a good sign in a dream cause that usually means its going to be one of those #stress dreams where im stuck in school for no reason cause i didnt REALLY graduate and have to do it all over #but this time it was different like there was still that lingering feeling at first but then i was just like no im just here to #pick up my diploma im not doing the usual bs #and also it was VASTLY different now like the whole first floor was just a huge starbucks? it had like 5 or 6 counters each with employees #and staff but it was also mainly empty there were only like may 1 or two other people #and i immediately started speaking in english cause yknow and they just assumed i was foreign so they just started speaking to me in the #usual broken italian english and also the way the stuff you could order was displayed SUCKED like you just had a few items listed here and #there and every counter had different listings so you had to walk all over the place to get a good idea but eventually i just asked them #what frappuccinos they had and this guy told me like the 4 different flavors they had but they were all gibberish? like they were just #made up words lmao. so i just picked a random one and he gave me a weird look like are you SURE you want that one? and i was like uh fuck #maybe that other then?? and he approved of the other one so i was like yeah sure and still no idea what flavors they were #eventually i got my order and they didnt even do the name thingy? but i did read something on the cup #cant remember the name but they wrote something interesting i was like huh ok #anyway it fucking sucked it was just. barely a milkshake? no distinguishable taste even if it looked like chocolate and NO whipped cream #like tf. plus it had those boba balls but not the good ones that pop the bad ones i dont like that are sticky #it was a very miserable drink but i didnt wanna complain so i just drank like half of it before leaving lmao

[astrxealis]

it is so weird being a mentor now ... ;O

( tags got really sentimental at the end WHEEZE beware if you check T___T )

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #i like it though !! :O + it looks cool AND i love helping people out hehe #i've been joining a lot of pfs and helping ppl mhmhmhm super fun <3 #it's weird though bcs now i see stuff for like ... nier/eden raids First Time/Unsync/Sync wtvr but. Man. i was literally There #it's weird but ?? just in a sentimental way :O like how i now seem like those mentors w rlly nice glams and all ?? #that i used to be like Wow at when i was newer to the gave ... then again i'm almost 2 years into this game >< crazy to think honestly #⋯ ꒰ა ffxiv ໒꒱ *·˚ #i do believe that ffxiv's story is something i wish for those i love to try out :'O hehe it made me genuinely overjoyed when my irls started #altho they DO have good taste with one liking persona (3 4 5 and not just 5!!) and the other w. a LOT #including nier and fire emblem and elden ring!! i love them /p they are my bro while the other is my bestie <33 #hm. i might get off track so i'll get back onto what i'm actually rambling about GBJSHDBHG #i do savage... ultimates... pvp... gpose and glamour :O i just don't do rp HJSDHGJ not yet at least >< #idk it just. man i'm pROUD OH MY GOD I JUST SAW GAWR GURA IN GAME uh yeah anyways yeah i'm really proud #here i am now literally doing some of the hardest content in game. when back in ... even shb nier e9s etc OH MY GOD... #first time doing e5?? i think it was e5. i literally was on the floor for most of the fight LMAO and back then as drg #i didn't know my goddamn rotation and didn't. use geirskogul (i forgot spelling sorry) until it was time for red dragon phase ... man #and now. yeah!! idk it's sentimental hours :'> wahhhh i'm really proud of myself for coming this far hehe #and i have to thank a lot of it to ffxiv in more ways than one T___T that game really is the epitome of Not Just A Game for me #it's helped w my social anxiety and anxiety and self esteem and inspiration and so much more including my probable. depression #and uhhhhhhh yeah yeah yk what connects to that HAHA so yeah as you can tell endwalker hit me SO hard #literally the only thing i couldn't relate to in endwalker is having lost a loved one bcs i have not yet... but i can. understand yeah :')) #ybghbhshjhbhdb idk i just think i deserve the biggest hug :] and even if no one will give it to me except for myself #i think that's enough. at the very least <333 #it's probably not obvious but. i still struggle with those kind of feelings a lot ... but i'm really proud of how strong i am >_< #i think loving yourself isn't really like. necessarily All The Time. i have my downs but generally i'm proud and glad to say that i love me

[hecksupremechips]

The most validating thing about having a brother in law is sometimes I’ll make a comment about my parents being kinda horrible and he’ll just be like "DUDE FINALLY SOMEONE SAID IT IVE BEEN THINKING THIS THE WHOLE TIME BUT DIDNT KNOW HOW TO ADDRESS IT"

#the klock keeps ticking #like i remember about 2 years ago when it really clicked with me that my parents were worse than i let myself believe #i had like covid and so to be safe i completely isolated myself in my room and only came out when no one was around #or with a mask on just to get food or use the bathroom that was it #and like when i had mostly recovered i stopped isolating and i looked around and noticed huh the house is kinda a hot mess #and i realized it was because i was the one who kept up with like basic cleaning and making sure things were in order #so like a little bit later i was in the car with my sister and brother in law and i was talking about this #and i was like ‘i think ive realized our parents are kinda unable to take care of themselves without me doing it for them’ #and my BIL was like IM SO GLAD YOU FINALLY NOTICED THIS HAS BEEN DRIVING ME CRAZY FOR YEARS #which was just so validating i was like okay so im not just being an ass like this is an actual problem #and idk a more recent thing that maybe uh. made me a little bit emotional was we were basically at a cool place where you can climb shit #and he was just kinda there helping me when it seemed i was gonna lose balance to make sure i didnt get hurt #as well as my sister too and i was like oh god is this was like. basic affection feels like??? #is this what it feels like to have someone care like actually kinda give a fuck about your safety and well being??? #so yeah i maybe am still not okay with that and still dont know how to feel anymore 😭 #so i guess even though hes stinky and i like to bully him I GUESS hes actually a pretty cool guy and he does make my sister happy and he #treats her with respect and hes very good with their cat so yeah maybe i actually really appreciate him and care more about him #than i do my parents and most people in my family #but i cant say that cuz then itll like. go straight to his head 🥺 #and he still wont play pokepark 2 with me even though he PROMISED its been like 4 years since he said that and WE STILL HAVENT PLAYED IT 👺👺👺

[gallusrostromegalus]

I was raised agnostic and tend to remain ambiguous on theological matters.

-but my house has a porch on the second story that affords me a terrific view of my neighborhood and the Colorado Front Range and I was partaking of some peace before the 4th Of July Finger-Loss Festivities begin, and I have had a

~*Spiritual Experience*~

I just watched my neighbor try to unload an actual wooden pallet that had to have been forklifted into the back of his insecurity pickup worth of fireworks.

Except that he does not have a forklift in his garage.

He does have so much sports memorabilia and cardboard boxes of unsold MLM Merchandise and patriotically themed camping gear and posters of women in bikinis and flags of suspect political organizations in his garage that there is only BARELY enough space for the fireworks and certainly none for his truck.

So he had to unload the individual boxes of recreational explosives from the back of his truck and stack them in the minimal space he had cleared by hand. This is a tedious and time-consuming process as this neighbor has purchased a wide variety of recreational and locally illegal explosives instead of many of just a few types, so the individual boxes are rather small.

He begins, and this is crucial to what happens next, by cutting apart the industrial-grade saran wrap his explosives dealer had so carefully wrapped his merchandise in, and discarded it unsecured on his lawn.

Where Outdoor Conditions sometimes happen.

His process for unloading the fireworks is to 1. Climb up through the gate into the bed of his pickup truck (a feat made unusually difficult due to the slope of his driveway, and this man's fascinating decision to wear the world's Siffest and least Flexible Denim Overalls. 2. Once in the pickup bed, he selects ONE (1) box from the pile He is apparently from a niche religious institution that doesn't believe in stacking things. 3. Carries it awkwardly around the palette that barely fits in the truck bed 4. His wife yells "Be careful!" when he nearly falls out of the pickup. 5. He Yells "SHADDUP!" back at her. 6. The Large German Shepherd barks from inside the house. 7. He yells "SHADDUP!" back at her too. 8. He sets the (1) box down on the gate 9. Slowly and awkwardly climbs out of the pickup bed 10. picks the box back up, and carries it into the garage.

Question: Aren't you going to help this poor man? Answer: Absolutely Not.

There's four military veterans, MANY dogs, and several people with dementia in this neighborhood, all of whom are terrified by this chicanery every year and many neighbors have repeatedly asked him to maybe do the fireworks somewhere else. (This is the Eighth Year Running he's held a major demolition event in his driveway, and for those of you who can do math, you may be able to guess the precipitating incident to this little ritual) Additionally, I live in Colorado, a state marginally less prone to spontaneous and catastrophic conflagrations than a rotting grain silo, but only marginally. Our recreational explosives laws are written accordingly.

I am in fact calling the Non Emergency line to report Fireworks violations, and reading off the brand labels to someone named Dorothy, who is gleefully totaling up a SPECTACULAR fine for my oblivious neighbor.

However, while I'm on the phone with Dorothy, I notice the wind begin to pick up. and by "Notice" I mean "The Industrial Saran Wrap he left on his Lawn earlier is suddenly swept up about 100 feet into the air by an updraft intense enough to make my ears pop" And by "Pick Up" I mean "I look up to see the sky has turned a fun and exciting shade of glass green, and the bottoms of the clouds are bumpy and rounded, and the overall effect is not unlike looking up through the bottom of the cup at God's Matcha Boba Tea."

For those of you who do not live in places with Inclement Weather, these conditions mean "You have about 30 seconds before a Major Meteorological Event Occurs."

I move under the eaves. "Hang on Dorothy." I say, nose filling with Petrichor. "The show is about to be cancelled." "Oh, that doesn't matter!" Dorothy cheerfully informs me. "It's illegal for him just to possess those, no matter if he actually gets to set them off or not." "Terrific, because he's gotten maybe five boxes out of a hundred inside."

Sometimes, the weather gods are Merciful and give you a verbal warning, typically in the kind of thunderclap that makes your ears ring.

The Gods were not merciful today.

It's not often that I am in the time, place, correct angle or in a properly observational frame of mind to see this, But I got to see it today. Huh. I thought. I've never seen a cloud just DIVE for the ground before. Oh. I realized as it got closer. That's RAIN.

Sometimes, a thunderstorm will form in such a way that the rain that would normally be distributed over an area of say, five to tent square miles, is instead concentrated into an area of say, my neighborhood exactly.

So today, I was granted the rare privilege of being able to actually see the literal wall of water descend from On High and DIRECTLY onto my porch, my street, and my neighbor's truck, and his pile of unwrapped fireworks.

The sheer impact force of the downpour immediately scatters the teetering pile of fireworks boxes in the back of the truck, like the wrath of God striking down the tower of Babel. Boxes tumble, then are washed out of the bed of the truck by the deluge. Smaller Boxes are carried down the road in a little line by the stream forming in the gutter, like little impotent explosive ducklings.

My neighbor was definitely yelling something, but I could not hear what over the DEAFENING noise several million gallons of water makes upon high-speed contact with the earth's surface, but there was a lot of arm-waving and faces turning red as he went looking for the saran wrap that had probably blown to Nebraska by now, while his wife started disassembling the complex three-dimensional puzzle of interlocking material goods in search of a tarp. They do not have a tarp. They have one of those wretched Thin Blue Line flags though, and my neighbor jogs out in a futile effort to cover what's left in the truck.

Which is when the hail begins.

"HELLO?" Yelled Dorothy. "HI!" I shouted. "WE'RE HAVING SOME WEATHER!" "OH GOOD!" she shouts back. "WE NEED THE MOISTURE!"

I watch for a minute longer, but the loss was immediate and catastrophic- the hail is the size of marbles and dense and cares not for your pitiful cardboard and cellophane, ripping the boxes asunder and punching holes in the few things covered in plastic. The colors on the Thin Blue Line Flag are seeping all over the remains of that it was supposed to protect in a particularly apt visual metaphor. Not even the few boxes that made it into the garage are spared, as the German Shepherd escapes from indoors, and in an attempt to assist her humans, jumps directly into the small stack of not-yet-ruined boxes, scattering them into the driveway and deluge. She even picks one up so her humans will chase her around the yard, before dropping it in the gutter to be swept away.

So. I was raised Agnostic -but even I can recognize when God slaps someone upside the head and shouts "NO!" at them.

---

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#Family Lore #Long Post #Local Man Experiences Local Weather

[boredymcbored]

Let's Vent

cause IDK if this will see the light of day but I'm upset.

You're sad. You're miserable. You're so easily fixable too. But only indulge in the sad huh?

Like my mess of a room. My weight gain (I'm surprised I'm not more upset at that for all the work I've done). Your loneliness. Cause you were lead on by a woman to join a friend group that you desperately needed (nefariously). Then were lead on again by a woman to join a friend group you desperately needed (genuine?). And you can't step away cause you're So Dang Likable! (TM) and you also love those people and need them cause you're so dang lonely.

Which is also your fault. Cause even after seeing two close friends in caskets, you can't get over your guilt of not being there the last couple of years for your HS friends and think it's best to remove yourself from their grace cause they're better off without you. Even though they keep saying they miss you.

And it's not just your highschool, but college friends too. You know of one person that always forgives your proclivities to self isolate and still be there but you can only text him sports ball shit. Still haven't told him when you'd call back btw. And yes he's your best friend the world has ever gifted you, but he's not yours. For that reason.

You can't even get solace from your incredibly worried mother cause she is quarantined from you because you actually decided not be be a recluse and hang out with friends. But they tested positive for covid. Now you're cut off from the person that can smell your sadness from miles away cause you can't even socialize with friends right before leading you to more isolation. At least you dodge her looks of pity and concern a few days, huh?

And now you beg for a sports ball team you like to be playing a game so that you can dissociate with the parasocial environment of twitter and reddit to FEEL at least somewhat fulfilled in the social department right? But it's social junk food and you know it. The artificial connections that you formed are not meaningful and you can act like it adds validity to some type of work that you've done in the past cause PREVIOUSLY people noticed it but now you don't have much of an aura of notability now do ya? Probably cause you're not on TV and only seem to be doing the same couple jobs with no career growth.

Not that you even want that growth do you? Cause you could be applying but are letting something that potentially ruined your ability to smoothly get hired or just traverse through the world weigh on you. And TBF the weight of that will now stick with you. That INCREDIBLY stupid thing that was non consequential has been a dark cloud over you for 3 years and won't go away cause of forces out of your control. ONE thing you can't control in this vent.

But you can control how fucking sad you get when you don't answer work questions right away and your mind starts to replay the words you've found hard to push out your mind "You can never do shit. You don't do shit". That woman that was supposed to support you, that you went through hell and shame to earn, told you that shit after you gave up so much of your self to help her, while you were fucking spiraling. And she broke you, didn't she? All the confidence that you were just starting to rebuild brick by brick was once again laid askew. You still haven't built it back either. From doing the world to barely being functional, that shit broke you in ways that you still are struggling with today. Guess you don't do shit after all.

My brain isn't rational rn. It'll say things that aren't all the way true or are heavily influenced by my loneliness, my anxieties, my fears and general unhappiness that I have rn in life. It's bringing up all my childhood traumas and insecurities to front and center stage and I just ... And it's no one else's fault that I'm feeling this way. But I feel neglected. And scared. of what i'd do. And my rationality. It's stopping me from being dramatic. Like right now I'm screaming to myself BITCH STOPPPP being so dramatic. And knowing my goofy ass, even with all my tears and fears, I smile as I write this..

But I know it's coping. It's self soothing. It's just me playing survivor man. Les Stroud at your service. Spending 7 days in the deep Andrea mindfuck wilderness. Scary, I know.

Cause the instinct to call for friends. Or call for help. Has taken over by the big bad that is my mind. And it's winning. And eating my life away. By doom scrolling. Making content and never releasing it. Having ideas and never doing it. Good ideas too man. So much creativity. And a gift. Ruined by a brain hungry to dim the light I'm holding on for dear life.

This is not a cry for help. I've been a lot more sad. A lot more crazy. Nothing is like being in the bathroom of my dorm after continuous isolation and identity issues, just trying to rip myself out of my body and away from the negative voices that were screaming at me to hurt myself. Everything was so grey then.

I still see color. I can find joy in the media I consume, despite the immense guilt I feel afterwards for not doing much else but that. Steph Curry is playing well? That makes me happy. I streamed. That was pleasant as well.

I feel like a waste of space but there's SOME rational part of me that reads all of what I wrote and KNOWS it's a lie. And I pray that I never lose that voice cause it's a DAMN good voice. I know I am the reason for most of these things, but not even in a bad way. In a way I can fix if I work on myself, one step at a time.

I just need hope to pull that out. And idk where to find it. I'll have to be the one to pull it, I know. I just need.. I don't know. But I need. And I feel pathetic for being so needy. And wanting. And being so unstable. But I NEED. And I don't know where I've gonna get my need from..

I just hope I find it soon.

#idk why but I'll hit the post button #I'll look back on this in a couple years and feel cringe about it #hopefully #that's what I've done looking at the sad posts I've had other years #“if only she knew how good it'd get” I'd think #hope it's the case here? #even while writing this I have a smile #a sad one but #ever since I've discovered it once I get in these funks exercise holds me over #but I can't do house stuff cause of quarantine and can't run cause my knees #bulgarian squats on my bed then? #bulgarian it is! #I love I can still make myself smile in the hell #despite the scary words I feel SO much better getting those thoughts out my brain if only for a moment #allowing the negative monkey voice to speak isn't bad. just believing it is #i almost completely deleted this and also made it private but no #just note this is extremely jaded because of my emotional state and has some moments of gross exaggerating cause of it #sometimes time helps you sort through emotional vomit and reality #i fear I'm not out of meltdowns like this cause something like this was almost posted like 4 days prior but its a vent for a reason

[thingswhatareawesome]

have super torn through the materials from the $bp, nice to make good progress on some characters though (like march/himeko/yukong and their light cones as I mentioned earlier). also did a ton more work again on evaluating relics. making sure to max out any gold ones that have 2+ needed substats. been trying to be conservative with the resources but that's holding my characters back, they're weak bc of low relics. so i think i've been too picky waiting. so yeah, so long as it's got the right main stat and at least 2 substats, i'm upgrading.

also then had to take a ton of time to do more with salvaging to then generate more of the material, and i really struggle with salvaging what really isn't a great item vs but what if a future character needs it or what if a 2/4 pc bonus combines with unexpected stats and gets recommended in the guides, like i wouldn't have suspected healing stats being needed on what looks to be non healing relic types. so hard to know what's trash and what the guides are going to suddenly say is useful. (and jfc is everyone going to end up in hackerspace?)

but doing my best. trying to use mats and not just hoard them for 'just in case' when characters need them now and i can tell it's why i'm so much weaker than other players. and trying to learn, like i know it takes me so much longer to pick up this information (just finally getting to where i understand pity and 50-50). wish there were a bit more info on this stuff for those of us who're new to hoyo games (like my dabbling in genshin never got me to gearing and evaluating stats so sr is basically my first).

not that many levels left on the battle passes, i'm in the 40s, so yeah, it'll be a bummer when that dries up. bc there's quite a while left before the new one.

#it'd still be nice if i could find people doing text guides about salvaging basics i'll have to keep looking #just not youtube i need writing >_>; #it's sad that i'm this game dumb but i've always been like that #took me all of vanilla wow to really learn the basics of mmos and raiding and to start to understand my class (rogue) #ofc then i promptly switched to warlock with burning crusade lol #but i think this style of game is different enough that i've really been clueless even though it's been since june #though it's *only* been since june like a few months? compared to the years i spent in other games (or near a decade and a half in wow) #it's just kind of like i think so many are so familiar with these systems from so much time in genshin or even that other honkai game #that it's all second nature like everyone's in hoyo college and i'm still in grade school #trying to find guides that handhold and speak to my 'for dummies' level >_>;; #and lord i still don't know if i'm rushing it and wasting materials maxing out upgrades on relics that match 2+ substats #maybe others wait for 3 or 4 substats? bc i tried and was upgrading so few it was so rare? #or do people max out just if the main stat matches or with that or one substat? #this is where i miss the social aspects of mmos i could ask others easier and compare what i was doing vs them #i like game8.co but i still have made so many so many mistakes bc even being a guide that assumes more knowledge of the system than i had #like i needed guides that said no don't trust their automatic relic assignment button it's bad you have to evaluate each item and here's ho #and here's where you use your resources to upgrade #finally have the achievement for synthesizing 5 relics though i'm going to be super cautious on doing more #what with the extreme rarity of the resin #anyway... babbling to the void here i know #please ignore my sr bs #and figures i salvage all that disciple stuff bc i don't have blade and the guides say other stuff for arlan (who i won't lvl for ages) #only to find out that it's exactly what fx will need and while i don't have her what if i do get her? #it's exactly why i've been in 'save everything' mode bc the moment i got rid of something i didn't need whoops turns out it might be needed #i swear this game makes me so often feel like i'm always not doing the right thing while constantly doing the wrong thing #i'd like to feel like i truly understand the basics and am mostly competent with them but i'm not to that point yet :/