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artificialqueens · 3 years

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I Wanna Ruin Our "Friendship" (Taywhora) - Vena

"You know, ‘galpal’ things can be nerve-wracking when you’re a gay, nervous wreck." Or it could simply be that Tayce used that as a shitty excuse to kiss Aurora without making things awkward.

a/n. An excuse to write vanilla Taywhora smut lmao. That's about it!

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“You know, ‘galpal’ things can be nerve-wracking when you’re a gay, nervous wreck,” Bimini calls out. Aurora, thus far, has been in a - slightly, mind you! - shocked state for quite a few seconds, her eyes wandering around like crazy as she tried to recall everything that had just happened.

Typhoon Tayce, that’s what happened.

Before she got to Black Cherry, it was all going as it usually went: the three girls piled up at Bimini’s, insulted each other then hyped each other up, put on pretty clothes (“Except for Tia,” Aurora would say), and took one first shot to get the night started.

Aurora looked through Bimini’s wardrobe to see if she could find something nice enough to “borrow” then never give back, going past the huge faux fur jacket with the leopard print and the collection of lime green slash neon pink shirts with a cleavage cut that barely covered their nipples.

“A button-up shirt, Bims?”

“Do you love it? Bought it for like, two dollars at a thrift store.”

“I mean,” Aurora said, “it’s pretty, but I wouldn’t wear it.”

Bimini’s scandalous laugh echoed through the room. “Try it on, babes!”

“Absolute clownery. I would never wear a button-up shirt. Especially not when going to a club,” Aurora said and grabbed her phone to scroll through Instagram, all too oblivious to the fact Tia had just finished buttoning up her yellow pineapple print shirt. Not that Tia would mind her words; after all, every day was Insulting Tia’s Fashion Choices Day for Aurora. Usual teasing. And she was okay with it.

“Much rather squash yourself into a tube dress that barely reaches the bottom of your knickers, right, Rory?” Tia counter-attacks. The Kofi Strikes Back.

Aurora rolled her eyes, laughing a bit. She grabbed the brush sitting by Bims’ nightstand and started combing the taller girl’s hair. “At least someone in this group has the chance to end the night up being pounded right. Bimini’s turned into a nun after meeting that guy Joey, and you have always dressed like you're 50-something. Therefore, I’m the hottest hoe out of yous.”

“ ’That guy Joey’, huh?” Bimini’s head peaked out of the bathroom door. “When will you stop calling him that? It’s been, what, nine months?”

“Yeah, and where is Bims a nun now? Those shorts are really living up to the short part. It’s leather, for fuck’s sake…” Tia groaned as a sharp pain went through her, coming straight from her scalp. “Ouch, you hound! Also, not everybody wants to end the night up being pounded, you know? Not shagging with a different stranger every week is also fun, maybe you should try it out sometime.”

“Yeah, you hound, not everybody likes syphilis!” Bimini yells from the bathroom. They all laugh.

Aurora yells back, “surely that doesn’t include you!”, and Bimini mumbles a small “not a joke, just a fact”.

The blondie put the brush away and landed a tiny kiss in Tia’s hair. She got off the bed, smacked Aurora in the arse, slightly touched by all that affection. “You know, when we first met, I first thought you were merely a bitchy prat. But now I realize I was absolutely correct all along. Although, I still love you.”

“I love being insulted for free!” the blondie blurted out. “Anyways. We should get going. It’s almost nine. Bims is taking the longest time to put on such little fabric on their tiny body and it’s pissing me off.”

“Oi!” Bimini yelled, still in the bathroom. “Can’t rush perfection!”

Tia stopped by the bathroom door and blew them a kiss. “Have fun staying home then, hound.” After that, they were quick to grab their respective belongings and order a cab.

London was not a quiet town, moreso on Friday nights. Everybody wanted to go out for drinks, chats, maybe even getting lucky, who knows? As a consequence, there were lots of clubs down that area, although, to the girls, none of them matched Black Cherry - their favorite.

Could be because Joey, the owner, had the hots for Bimini ever since they first met - they matched up quite well, ended up shagging then dating - so it was free drinks for the three of them. There was more to it, though: the atmosphere, the people, the location. Felt like magic whenever they stepped inside, letting the music consume them (not the usual upbeat pop they had around the other clubs, the songs were picked very carefully by Ellie, their quote-unquote, “DJ”).

Aurora would deny it always and forever, but there was a bigger reason for her to always try to look her best every Friday night. And it had a name, time, and a beautiful pair of hands: Tayce, who always arrived a bit past ten (after making her friends wait for a solid half-hour), who was the embodiment of a moon child, who was the life of the dance floor.

Tayce was ridiculous. That was the only proper word Aurora could think of to describe her. Ridiculously beautiful, ridiculously smart, ridiculously nice.

First of all, great fashion. Tayce stood out with that astounding b&w jacket dress and those thigh-high boots (Aurora loved thigh-high boots more than watching Project Runway whilst eating Percy Pigs, ad that means something ). Not to mention her hair seemed as if it that been tailored by the most royal of silkworms. Black, straight (unlike her, as Aurora would soon find out), and downy. Tayce’s skin tone reminded her of milk chocolate or Nutella, or maybe she was just hungry. Her eyes were two beautiful almonds (she was definitely hungry) and her plump, glossy lips were so full. and. kissable. Um…

Pretty. Ridiculously pretty.

And social. Tayce chatted with anyone who approached her, even the drunken blokes far too hammered to realize she was way out of their league who tried to get some. Friendly, but not like she would just let anyone get a hold of her. Aurora searched for the word in the confines of her brain, though it was hard… Assertive? Chatty? Someone who seemed to belong to the world? The word was right there…

“Confident.”

“What?” Aurora asked.

“The word is confident, babes.” Bimini hugged her waist. “You keep saying those things aloud, she might notice it in a while! That is if she hasn’t already…”

Aurora rolled her eyes and left them to it. They always went to the club together but parted ways after a few moments: Aurora could be found nearly shagging with some girl on the dance floor, Bimini went upstairs to do who-knows-what with Joe and Tia just danced her brains out - she truly did not need anyone to make her night better, apart from Lady Gaga and Kylie Minogue. By midnight, the blondie was far too gone, could barely remember her own name, but boy was she having the time of her life.

Somehow, whilst dancing (trying to - she was not the best dancer ever, truth be told), she bumped into Ms. Tall, Dark & Handsome

“Oh, nightie, Tayes! You look stunning tonight, by the way.”

“Rory, hi.” Tayce gave her an awkward hug. “You sound absolutely plastered.”

“No that, just… my voice is horse- I mean, hoarse - tonight.” Aurora cackled at herself. Words really were not her favorite thing (the perks of being dyslexic), and those few too many shots only aggravated her situation. “What I’m trying to say is…”

Tayce nodded and giggled. God, even her goddamn giggle was beautiful. Aurora wanted to drown in her. “You’re absolutely plastered.”

“Not that!”

“You are,” Tayce laughed, which caused the other girl to laugh as well. She was so damn cute. “Wanna know a secret?” Aurora nodded. “I am too.”

They both exploded in laughs, finding everything so damn funny besides all the nonsense they were saying. Just like every other Friday night, Tayce and Aurora chit-chat for a while. They were not friends, more like known strangers, but being regulars of the same club for so long meant their faces, voices, and presence were not that foreign to one another. And, since drunken A’whora was oh-so-sociable, of course, they would talk sometime.

(Because sober Aurora was too much of a chicken to reach out to Tayce. Imagine actually talking to a girl that beautiful without some alcohol in one’s system… She was friendly, yeah, but also intimidating as hell. Maybe because she was insanely attractive. Or it could be her eyebrows. Why was she even thinking about that right now, when they were discussing clothes and college stuff? Where did that come from?)

Whatever.

At a given moment, Where Have You Been Came on the speakers. And the way Aurora’s eyes sparkled as she started hopping in her place, yelling out the lyrics, looking like the happiest bitch in the world made Tayce’s heart kind of… race?

She had felt that a few times for Aurora, but it is hard not to when she’s just that pretty. And Tayce liked pretty girls. A lot. A whole lot.

As the end of the song approached and Aurora calmed down from all the “that’s my song!” and “Rihanna, I love you!”, Tayce didn’t even notice her body acting up against her will (or was it?), leaning forwards and forwards and grabbing the blondie by the neck. “You just look so pretty right now. I love your smile.”

The tension could’ve been cut with a damn knife, given how they were staring at each other. Confused, but into it. What the actual fuck , Aurora thought. Maybe she’s just way too drunk. Maybe she’s about to pass out and-

Tayce kissed her. And kissed her, and kissed her, and touched her. It was hurried, filled with luxury, as though they needed each other’s lips to keep them alive. Full of a desperation neither knew existed. Aurora could have never seen it coming, for she saw the tall girl as an untouchable being - because of some stupid reason. Tayce could have never seen it coming, for she didn’t believe she would have the guts (even intoxicated Tayce!) to do it anyways.

Turns out she did. Who knew?

As they parted, Tayce noticed the surprise that still took over Aurora’s face. Fuck? So she did what she did best: create a distraction. With a bright smile, all teeth and gums, Tayce said “galpal things.”

And they both laughed it off, as Aurora walked away trying to process everything out, almost instantly sobered out from the shock.

“Tayce just kissed me. No like, The Tayce just kissed me.”

“We’ve seen it,” Bimini replied.

“No, but she kissed me!”

“We’ve seen it,” Tia replied.

“Then she said it was ‘galpal’ things, Bims, Tee, I’m…?”

Finally, finally , we reach the start once again. Properly contextualized, this time. Bimini’s hand rested against her bare shoulder. “You know, ‘galpal’ things can be nerve-wracking when you’re a gay, nervous wreck.”

Tia shrugged. “The perks of being a lesbian. Y’all never know shite! She could take your bitch ass to Paris and ask you to marry her during the most romantic date in the world and you would still be all oh-she-wants-to-be-friends-that’s-all, no wonder she dismissed it as being galpal things.”

“So you think she meant it?”

“Babes. Please. She grabbed your titties. That’s not a girl-friends thing, it’s a girlfriends thing.”

Aurora blushed hard, her ears so red it could be seen even under the club’s dim purple lights. “Suddenly you��re not that fitting for the nickname A’whora. Who’s the nun now?” Bimini teased.

Aurora laughed, back to her normal, usual state. Not that shy, lost mess, totally not confused as to why Tayce (The Tayce!) would ever want anything to do with her. “How can I be a prude if Tayce was grabbing my tits about three minutes ago?”

“Can’t be arsed.”

“But,” Tia said, “you should go to her, yanno? She could be your special one for the night.”

Tia was (as usual) correct.

[...]

There was no way of explaining how on Earth they both got to Aurora's apartment in such a short time. Her excitement was showing, as well as her nervousness. She had not been this close to her like, ever (!). As soon as the front door was closed, Aurora threw the girl to the sofa and climbed on top of her, the tension stronger than ever before. And, as Tayce’s fingers sneaked under the hem of her dress, right at the middle of her thigh, Aurora could have sworn there was nothing, nothing else in the world she wanted more than having the girl’s lips on hers once more.

“Please…,” she managed to let out. “Can we kiss… again?”

Tayce smiled wide (which made Aurora’s guts do flips and jumps that would put Olympic champs to shame) before leaning in agonizingly slow and trapping Aurora on her once again. With her piercing gaze, soft lips, and firm hands that wandered around everywhere she could reach; Aurora was a goner for her.

"Take me to your room," Tayce asked.

There was truly no sight like it, having such an astoundingly pretty woman in her bedsheets. Aurora let her hand fall to Tayce’s thighs, pulling her closer and already tugging at the band of her underwear. Tayce’s lips twisted in a seductive smirk, the same smug look she carried with her all night. Aurora sometimes thought that was her resting face. Not that she was complaining, for it was so. damn. charming. “Thought you’d be the one receiving tonight…”

And, impulsive slag she was, couldn’t revise the words before they came to exist. “I’m ambidextrous.” Oh no. She’s laughing. That wasn’t sexy. Did I just ruin the mood or…?

“Good to know. I’m right-handed most of the time, you know,” Tayce said, grabbing Aurora’s hand and placing her right one underneath. And, damn, Aurora tried hard not to follow her every movement, but Tayce’s hands were simply mesmerizing and she couldn’t help herself. Long fingers. Black nail polish, so perfect it seemed she either got it done that day or never did dishes in her lifetime. Soft skin.

Fuck.

(She knows it’s weird, okay. Being caught way too many times staring endlessly at people’s hands and dealing with the embarrassment that washed over her face once someone else noticed was more than enough reminder. But, like aforementioned: she couldn’t help herself.)

“You like them?” Tayce arched her brow, eyes pointing to her hands. The blondie gulped. She really was not subtle, was she? “Talk to me, princess.”

“I- I do. I love your hands.”

From there, Tayce’s hand made way to Aurora’s chin. Held her in place then guided her neck upwards till she was exposed enough for Tayce to abuse the area however she wanted. Started out with small pecks here and there, whilst her thumbs traced tiny circles in Aurora’s collarbone. The blondie was slowly melting under her kisses, although she stiffened up once Tayce’s tongue met her skin. The touch was warm, wet, and welcome. It made Aurora squirm, whine at a low volume. Her legs pressed together and kept moving to find a position that would at least help her a bit. Yes, she was extremely easy to rile up and the other girl could definitely tell that just from that brief moment. And Tayce enjoyed it. A lot.

Still licking and sucking her neck, Tayce tried her best to get rid of the tight black dress Aurora was wearing. She felt her zipper being slowly pulled down, the night breeze a lovely contrast to the warmth that emanated from Tayce’s body. And from between her thighs.

“Take this off for me, would ‘ya?” Tayce asked, already fumbling with the lock of the blondie’s bra. Aurora was more than happy to oblige if that meant Tayce would call her princess once again, and in no time she was wearing nothing but her underwear and the black stockings. Tayce grabbed her breast once again, making her shudder from the intensity of her touches. It felt different for she was almost naked, no more fabrics keeping them apart. Better. Tayce flicked one of her nipples with her fingers before lowering her mouth and sucking it hard enough to earn her the loudest moan yet.

“Please, Tayes… Um…”

“What, princess? Tell me.”

Aurora grabbed her face and planted a kiss in her mouth.“Bite me,” she ordered.

Tayce smiled. That girl truly was something else. Switching between shy and demanding, begging then ordering. Made Tayce want to get to know all her sides. She had always thought Aurora was a figure, with her huge blonde curls, short dresses, and her way of flirting with everything that moved - be it seducing random men in the bars for the free drinks or trying to get on with a girl. It was fun, really, observing her from far away and periodically making small talk. Her interest in Aurora started to be more because of how her eyes crinkled when she smiled, her laid-back attitude, and her presence rather than for her spectacular pair of legs.

Plus, there was no denying it. Aurora was gorgeous.

Tayce obeyed her. Bit the tip of her nipple, at first lightly just to test Aurora out. By the way she was writhing and moaning underneath her, Tayce knew it was working. So she sucked it again, letting her tongue wander around the soft, fair skin, leaving red marks wherever she touched. Then went back to biting, closing her teeth around the hard bud a bit harsher than before, just to find Aurora really, really enjoyed it.

Aurora left a trail of sweet kisses on the girl’s hair, drunk not only on alcohol but also on her smell. Tayce was driving her insane, and they had not even been doing much. W ith one shift move, the blondie straddled Tayce’s body, trapping her between her legs. “Thought you liked being under?”

“You got it wrong, pretty baby.” Tayce’s breath hitched once Aurora grabbed her thighs, spreading them further apart. The blondie’s hand sneaked through her skirt, quickly finding her already damp underwear and playing with her clit through the thin lace. “I like… fuck, um, being fucked , not necessarily… under. Fuck, Rory.”

She had never heard Tayce’s voice sound so small and desperate as when she was grinding against the back of her hand. Fuck, Tayce was wet. “Feels good, baby?” Aurora managed to ask.

“Hm, yes… Need… need more.”

Aurora pulled Tayce’s panties off, and it slid through her legs till they reached the floor. Tayce spread her legs out even more whilst holding her skirt up, wanting nothing, nothing more than Aurora to just fuck her as she wanted.

“You’re so fucking hot, Tayes… God, you’re wet.”

Tayce smiled smugly once again. “Like it? All for you- ah! Fuck.” She couldn’t keep her volume down once Aurora dropped to her knees and stuck her tongue out, licking right above her folds and fumbling her clit up and down. She smiled at the reactions Tayce was having, already having her hands entangled in Aurora’s curls, trying to guide her head. But oh, she would not let Tayce have her way so easily. Aurora sucked her thighs, her stomach. Lifted her leg and gave her a slap in the ass. Tayce had to hold her position with both hands, but the moans got louder the closer Aurora got to her center.

“Rory, be a darling and do what you gotta do!”

Aurora kissed her thigh once more. She was up for some teasing, definitely. “Weren’t you the one who made me ask for everything just now? Tell me what you want, Tayes.”

“Eat me out. Right now.” Aurora arched a brow. “… Please.”

“Good girl.” Tayce didn’t even have time to register the pet name properly before Aurora went down on her. Straight to her swollen, wanting clit. She kissed it, sucked the very tip before pulling it back and exposing her even more; that was when she started to rapidly flick her tongue against it.

“Fuck, Rory, just like that… Ah, fuck.”

Aurora’s middle finger pressed against Tayce’s entrance. The other hand helped keep her in place.

“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me…” Tayce was far too gone to care about her cool image. She just wanted Aurora inside her as soon as possible. And Aurora gave it to her, how could she deny such a thing? She forced two of her fingers against the girl’s entrance. She did not need much though, for Tayce was dripping wet Aurora thrust her fingers in and out, curving her knuckles frantically inside of Tayce to reach her spot. By the sounds she was making, absolutely wrecked and stupid, it was working damn well. “More. More, Rory, fuck…”

Aurora was rapturous having that woman moaning her name like crazy. She had fucked a lot of people during her lifetime, but this was something else. The haunting thought she was simply a one-night stand for Tayce made her frown, but her brain was so full of all-things-Tayce she simply dismissed it quickly. She was there, Tayce was there and making her feel like the only woman in the world. She wanted nothing but to please her girl.

My girl? She’s not my girl. Stop thinking!

“Rory, more, please, use your tongue again, ah- fuck… Yes, fuck, you’re so good...” Aurora hummed in satisfaction against her, which caused a bolt to run through Tayce’s body. “Oh, fuck. I’m … getting… close, princess…”

Princess. Aurora did not know a simple word could have such an effect on her. Her hands started working faster, fucking Tayce harder, harder, harder until she could not take it anymore. Tayce was squirming, shaking, her legs could not stay still. She had to let it out. She had to. Had to. “Fuck, I’m so close, fuck…” Aurora increased the speed of her tongue as well. Her clit was so damn sensitive it hurt. She needed release, so bad, so bad, so bad and...

“Fuck!” Tayce cried out as an orgasm washed over her body, pulling Aurora’s head even closer to her, rocking her hips back and forth against her fingers whilst Aurora pumped them in and out the fastest she could, helping the girl ride her high. “Ah, Rory, fuck… Fuck.” Tayce’s previously shaking body had lost all its tension. She felt like jello. A cute smile lit up her face. “Fuuuck. That was good.”

Aurora climbed back up to her bed. She seemed just as content. “Was it?”

Tayce rolled her eyes. “Yeah, ask as if you didn’t just watch me cum my brains out for you. Of course, it was good! Whoa.” Aurora’s right hand peeked inside her own damp panties. “Do you want some help over there, princess?”

“No, just stay there looking pretty. I’ll cum in no time, I swear to you.”

And Tayce did as told, losing herself in Aurora’s lips as the blondie rubbed herself with tiny circles, moaning against the kisses every now and then. She was so worked up from getting Tayce off, relishing in the memories of her whimpers and her taste and just… everything. It really took no time for Aurora to get closer and closer and closer and cum all over her own hands. Fucking hell, she was satisfied. Very satisfied.

“I like you.” Tayce intertwined her fingers around Aurora’s slick, wet hand before guiding it to her mouth and licking it clean. It was kinda hot, but her eyes were so wide and doe if seemed almost… innocent. As if they had not spent the past few minutes fucking like horny teens. It was cute somehow. “I know we barely converse, but you’re pretty, fun, and sexy as hell. And girl, talk about that tongue! So… if you’re interested in like, going on a date, I’m so down.”

Aurora chuckled. “Hah. Thought I’d be a one-night stand.”

“Same. You always have a different girl with you… But thought I should shoot my shot since we came all the way here. Literally, came…” they both smiled. “So… what do you say?”

“I’d absolutely love to go on a date with you, Tayes. ” Anyone would. Can’t believe she chose me, amongst them all…

“Guess it’s a deal then, Rory. When are you free?”

“Pick me up tomorrow at eight.” Aurora thought better. “Or just stay here, we’ll see what we can do.”

“Perfect.”

They cuddled (“I knew you were a little spoon, Rory!”). Aurora couldn’t ignore her friends’ perfect timing, as her phone shone indicating a new message had been received in their group chat:

Tee:

whora ru alive 🥺 or did she fuck u so hard u dead now?

Bims:

Hope you didn’t give her syphilis x

Tee:

thatd be u and joey only,, the syphilis couple. my girl whora is TESTED x

Bims:

Heard from Joey you got laid too, he saw you walking out the club with a piece!!

Tee:

and awhora had the nerve tell me i wouldnt fuck anyone with my button up shirt huh

Bims:

Y’all nasty 🥰 now excuse me I gotta go get pounded as well lmao goodnight babes x

Tee:

no bims we cant go. theyre lesbians. what if they get married in the meantime and we dont even hear about it!

Whora:

Goodnight hoes and nooo not yet! But she’s taking me out tomorrow yikes

Tee:

aaand shes sleeping there

Whora:

Yeah <3

Tee:

👀👀👀

Bims:

Give them 3 months, Tia. x

Whora:

Luv u hounds! nightie

Tee:

nightie !!

Bims:

Nightie!

#rpdr fanfiction #taywhora #rpdr uk #uk2 #tayce #a'whora #lesbian au #smut #fluff #clubbing #pet names #dom bottom tayce #vena #concrit welcome #submission

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thefossilwhale · 3 years

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i filled out this super cool button character profile by @extraordinarymage for sabrina! thank you for making this, it was a lot of fun to fill out <3 the bulk of it is under a cut and oh boy is it long !!!

Short, Quick Reference

Name: Sabrina Wiseman

Pronouns: She/her

Sexuality: Bisexual

Love Interest: Kent

Main personality trait: Confidence

Secondary personality trait: Morbidity

Relationship with Nick: Full of love, haunted by unaddressed guilt and frustration. But mostly full of love.

Nickname for Nick: Saint Nick (used sparingly)

Resentful or accepting?: Slightly resentful

Main strategy (interpersonal, insightful, innovative?): Insightful

Ethical or expedient?: Expedient

GENERAL

Name: Sabrina Larkspur Wiseman

Nickname(s): Sab, used by anyone; Sabby, only Nick and Sally; and, of course, Button for Nick.

Birthday: I think I made her an October Libra for the purpose of a template I did months ago, but I’m not sure! No concrete birthday yet, I’m always very slow to nail down details like this.

Age: 20

Pronouns: She/her

Sexuality: Bisexual

Hair color + style: Blonde. A little past shoulder length, sometimes wavy. Usually a middle part. For Aeon, tied back in a bun.

Eye color: Blue, entirely because of the section of Frank O’Hara’s “Meditations in an Emergency” that goes, “My eyes are vague blue, like the sky...”

Height: 5′5

Piercings: Multiple in each ear, but a couple have started to close.

Tattoos: None yet! Sab likes the idea of a tattoo but is worried about finding the perfect design, whether she’d end up hating it, that the pain might be greater than she expects and she’ll look like a baby in front of her tattoo artist. I’d like to think she eventually consults Sally and/or Glitch to come up with an idea that she falls in love with, but I haven’t come up with what that would be!

Clothing style: Mostly solid colors, not a lot of patterns. Nothing super bright, but a fairly varied mix of pastels, neutrals, dark colors, black. Partial to denim skirts and sweater tops. Ankle boots. Likes a good turtleneck. She’s bolder when it comes to formal wear, and especially loves suits. Big fan of silk and satin.

Since she has a pretty accurate face claim, I’ll link some gifsets I’ve rb’d for appearance ref if you are so inclined.

STATS

I’m always adjusting minor things and swapping scenes around, but these are from my most recent Sab run! Most scores hover somewhere around these values.

Personality:

Confidence: 53%

Humor: 5%

Morbidity: 22%

Resentful: 57% | Accepting: 43%

Strategy:

Interpersonal: 12%

Insightful: 50%

Innovative: 10%

Ethical: 43% | Expedient: 57%

KEY DECISIONS:

What is Nick’s nickname and why?: Saint Nick, used very rarely. It’s a joking reference to the time she thought Santa was an evil Ment out to ruin Christmas, and a point about Nick overdoing it with the cheer. “Saint Nick” is usually code for “I know you mean well, but please mind your own business.” Otherwise, she just calls him Nick.

What is their favorite type of cookie (and its name and why?): Salted caramel chocolate chip! No special name.

What was their initial reaction to Sally hugging them, as kids?: She just froze. That could just be me projecting adult Sabrina onto her childhood self; I don’t imagine that she was as uncomfortable around strangers or quite as cautious back then. But that’s what I’ll stick with.

How did they ace the ASE test?: The in-game option she takes is “My entire life has revolved around strategic avoidance,” but the one about being just plain smart also sounds like her. If Sab has the chance to thoroughly (over)prepare for something, she will do it. Her mind blindness also has her constantly (over)analyzing situations. So, hard work and relentless anxiety!

Did they manage to win their first assignment? How?: Yes, by having Sally block the door. I’ve headcanoned some slight differences in how it plays out, which I wrote about in-depth here. To summarize, Sab thinks of blocking the door as a desperate last resort, not a clever loophole, and she pushes back against Rosy’s praise because she wishes she could have done it the “real” way. Rosy goes from being impressed to being annoyed that she’s willfully missing the point.

What was the primary emotion Button felt during the Aeon bombing (love, gratitude, etc?): Guilt. She feels very guilty about how much Nick has given up for her in general, but I think that in the moment, it’s on a smaller scale. The fact that Nick was on the phone with her when it happened, coming to her rescue like always, becomes emblematic of their whole relationship for her, and she really fixates on that.

Who drove them home from the hospital from and why?: Glitch. Sab responds to her initial text with “Are you sure?”, and is relieved when Glitch takes that as “Yes, please.” She doesn’t relish the idea of being around someone more connected to her family or Nick at that point.

How do they feel about Nick riding around in their mind?: Worried, at first. Just because it’s so unknown and absolutely insane. After seeing Doctor Amari, she’s excited! Sab is thrilled to be a Pollard Five and intends to take full advantage of it. I am not looking forward to seeing how she reacts when that’s taken away from her.

Why did Button agree to do the undercover mission?: To prove she still deserves to be an MIV. Sabrina feels stupid and reckless for putting herself, Nick, and Aeon in this position, but she knows she’s smart, and she hasn’t worked this hard for nothing. She wants to prove what she could do with a normal Pollard Score and make herself too valuable to give up even when she’s back to Zero.

Told Glitch about your mind blindness?: Depends on the playthrough. I’m constantly going back and forth on whether Sab meets Glitch for coffee or wanders the city with Nick in her second chapter 5 slot (after trying to track down Kent). If she does meet Glitch, though, she absolutely tells her; with how touchy Sab is about privacy, she couldn’t stomach not warning Glitch that Nick could hear everything they said.

Figured out K’s secret?: Nope. She finds enough of the clues to be given the “I knew it!” option in-game, but she didn’t actually put it together. Sab is too angry and embarrassed by learning that Kent is an AMO to find any reason to interrogate it. “The random guy I met before school just happens to be a jerk” is a perfectly sound explanation to her.

Found Noh’s clues?: Not at the metro station. Sometimes she sees the Vengeance brooms in chapter 5 (again, depending on the playthrough), but that’s it.

ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP:

Love Interest: Kent

Why them?: Sab feels an immediate kinship with Kent after learning about the NPO program. It’s kind of funny how quickly he moves from the least sympathetic position in her eyes (Ment who got past me and read my mind without my knowledge) to the most sympathetic (non-powered child of a prominent family aiming a league above where he “belongs”). A lot of new respect for his competence. Her fate is sealed when she realizes that his kindness at the hospital wasn’t him trying to make up for some wrongdoing, but just him being very sweet. (She had scoffed over “You needed help.” But now she’s like, “Oh. He meant that?! Fuck.”)

As they spend more time together, Sab realizes how weirdly similar they are in other ways, too. And she starts to feel safe/secure around him in a way that she’s extremely not used to. Growing up surrounded by Ments, Sab has a lot of issues about being too much, too difficult, needing to “be worthy” of love. So someone like Kent who is not a Ment, who has no “obligation” to care about her, and whose judgement she trusts implicitly? Being around him and being loved by him mean a lot, and I think will go a long way towards helping her reflect on her other relationships!

What are their first impressions of each other?: Okay, there are like 3 first impressions with Kent. First: he’s tall and handsome and secretly adorable, and they have similar career goals, so she’s drafting a five-month plan to woo him and get his number. Second: he’s a lying, self-obsessed loser who owes her many explanations. Third: oh no, the first impression was true! And he’s been continually, selflessly kind to her in spite of her overt hostility. Scratch the five-month plan, because the crush was only fun when it was entirely superficial; now she really, really likes him and that just sucks.

We know that Button makes a good impression on K by stopping for their dogs, but apart from that... I mean, the “we confused each other” from chapter 7 is very apt. Sab has lots of shifting personas, and Kent sees pretty much every one within 24 hours. The prevailing impression before everything gets cleared up is probably just that she cares a lot? About everything? Her stopping for the dogs, how seriously she takes the first assignment, the way she seems so deeply affected by something he said or did that morning. It’s a rare side of her to meet first because she usually pretends to be above everything.

What feature does your Button find most attractive in their RO (ex. appearance, personality, etc.)?: Probably his composure. And his... steadfastness? The way he seems unruffled by anything, his soothing presence. She really admires that about him and finds the calm contagious.

What do they do to spend time together?: Going on drives together! Kent driving while Sab plays songs she thinks he’ll like, talking or not talking. Cuddling on the couch while reading their own separate books. Museum dates. Walking the dogs together.

Do they argue? How do they handle arguments and disagreements? How do they make up?: I imagine that the first month or so of their relationship would be difficult, just because they’re both bad at expressing themselves and not used to relying on other people. Kent kind of negates a lot of Sab’s impulses to get defensive or hostile, so instead of arguments, I think there are more likely to be awkward periods where she’s just stewing in something without addressing it. Most of their fights would be, like, one of them becoming really distant for a concerning number of days until the other tries to awkwardly check in on them.

What does their future look like?: Uhh some random lore: I think eventually they do get married, despite neither of them caring that much about it. Sabrina would be excited to have something to plan, and she knows it would make the people around her happy. They have a long engagement; there’s never really an “official” proposal, just an acknowledgement that yeah, they’ll get married one day, and then eventually they get rings. The engagement is almost Sab’s favorite part, honestly. She likes planning and showing off her ring and calling Kent her fiancé, a lot of fanfare on her part for a wedding that ends up being very modest and chill.

OTHER RELATIONSHIPS (Feel free to go in depth!)

Relationship with Nick: When I first started developing Sab, I thought that with as difficult/prickly as she can be, her relationship with Nick would be worse than it is. Never bad, but certainly strained, with more jealousy/resentment on her side. However, she rejected this. She is resentful, but never towards Nick—she internalizes the negative parts of their relationship so they manifest as guilt instead. And that’s the problem, not resentment. Sab thinks he’s overprotective, but that doesn’t make her angry; it just makes her sad. She wishes things were different and he didn’t feel so responsible for her, but she also doesn’t know how she could manage without him taking on so many of her burdens. So, guilt! So much love, but always looming guilt.

Having Nick in her head has helped. It’s added a new kind of guilt (“I’m a horrible person for being so giddy that people can’t hear my thoughts even though that requires my brother to be in a coma”), but getting inside Nick’s head for once and really feeling his love for her changes things. Makes her feel way more secure, I guess? It’s easier to see her brother as human person, a friend who loves her, rather than a perfect selfless paragon who sacrificed everything to raise her, which is an important shift.

There are also Things happening with self-presentation in the fact that they’re both models, and flirts, and pretend to be shallow. And the ways that they’ve responded to vastly different expectations. And selflessness versus selfishness. But I have no idea how to talk about that yet.

Relationship with Father: Strained and distant. Sabrina doesn’t necessarily blame him for leaving, but she hates how he’s handled it. She’s incredibly frustrated that John insists on keeping them in this miserable limbo of uncomfortable visits, even though moving away was (to her) a tacit acknowledgement that she and her parents are better off without each other. He’s trying to force a relationship that Sab thinks is ultimately harmful for everyone involved. For Nick’s sake, she’s willing to grin and bear the visits, but it never works because John can obviously tell it’s an act. He pushes her, she gets defensive, and so on to infinity.

Relationship with Mother: Like with John, Sab doesn’t resent Hope for the incident itself, or for leaving afterward. It was terrifying, and the idea of being around Hope makes her panic—but she thinks of that as just another irrational anxiety symptom, and she’s trying to work through it. What she does resent Hope for is letting it get to that point at all. Sab is incredibly bitter that Hope will suffer silently to the point of almost killing her (during the incident) and potentially herself (with the BRS), while Sab has no choice but to be completely open. Especially because they’re so similar in that way—she’s almost jealous. “Oh, so your silence is allowed to almost kill me and it’s ‘nobody’s fault’ but I can’t pretend to enjoy a single lunch with Dad without him calling me out for lying?”

And even though she doesn’t hold the incident itself against her, Sab is very hung up on “Why are you never quiet? Why are you always there?” She knows, on some level, that this was not a Personal Judgement against her. But because Hope keeps so much quiet, this is the only honest expression of her mother’s feelings that she can remember! It would take a lot for Sab to believe that Hope was really, genuinely interested in reconnecting with her, rather than just pretending to love her "enough” this time because to do otherwise would reflect poorly on Hope as a mother.

Relationship with Sally: Besties <3 Sally is the only member of the Wiseman inner circle that Sab doesn’t have complicated feelings about. They both have hidden morbid streaks that they bring out in each other, and can laugh about. They both have competitive streaks that work well together because they’re always on the same team. And their wants/needs from the relationship complement each other well, I think. Sally has always felt valued because she’s useful and not because she’s loved, while Sab has always felt smothered by love/care without feeling like she genuinely adds value to other people’s lives. So it means a lot to both of them that they’re able to help each other practically, while also genuinely loving and supporting each other outside of that.

Relationship with Gray: Full of trust and genuine care, but predicated on distance. Sab loves him a lot for being so careful not to cross any boundaries, physical or emotional, with her. She’s grateful that he’s there for Nick in a way that she doesn’t feel she can be. But "I like Gray because he doesn’t push me and is good to Nick” means that any hand he extend makes her defensive, because she’ll either view him as an emissary of Nick or start to panic because their normal routine is being disrupted (she doesn’t tell him about Hope in ch 3, for example).

They get along very well in a friend-of-a-friend sort of way, and bond over being cautious counterparts to Nick. Also, Sab never had a crush on Gray, but she is not immune to tall superhero and thinks it’s fun to fake flirt with him. (You know Isabela’s “You have pretty eyes” routine from DA2? Sab does that to Gray when conversations steer towards things she’d rather not talk about.)

Relationship with Glitch: I’m really excited about these two! They click from the start, and Sabrina feels immediately comfortable around Glitch, which makes her feel distinctly uncomfortable whenever she catches herself. Externally, they have pretty different personalities, but they’re both perceptive and... socially manipulative? aware of their self-presentation?... in ways that they both pick up on right away. So it’s a lot of conversational maneuvering and trying to figure out what the other’s game is, while also genuinely enjoying each other’s company.

Relationship with Kent/Kenna: I could go truly insane here. See the romance section above instead.

Relationship with Kim: Sab wants him to like her sooooo bad. He’s one of the only people to ever really get through to her, re: my headcanon conversation after the first assignment. Authority figures tend to treat her as special, whether that’s negatively because of her mind blindness or positively because she’s such an overachiever. She had no idea how to respond to that not being the case (and didn’t handle it well at first), but chapter 6 solidifies her respect for him.

It also turns Rosy’s opinion of Sab around; he was impressed by her in class but left his office thinking she was self-absorbed and naive. But the bombing is a reality check, and her response is very measured and practical in a way that surprises him.

Relationship with Lev: She doesn’t mind the comparisons to Nick or the “maybe one day they’ll fix you” comments as much as you might think. They aren’t her favorite, but she prefers that sort of thing to the inspirational platitudes belied by coddling that she got from her family growing up. Sab has fond memories of Lev and is grateful that he’s always been kind to her, but doesn’t have any particular feelings apart from that.

Relationship with Clarence: Holds a grudge against him for causing a scene, making her late, and generally being a jerk. But she can’t fault him for being right, after what happened! Mostly she just wants to avoid him, but she’ll be thrilled to lord her success over him if/when she proves herself.

Relationship with Dean Branham: Like Rosy, another authority figure that Sab desperately wants to impress. But without the personal investment she has in Rosy’s validation, more “Oh, this person is in charge, so I should make her like me!” Despite Nick’s and Rosy’s reservations, Sabrina doesn’t really have a problem with being “strongarmed” or manipulated into cooperating; for now, she figures Branham was just doing her job and respects her tactics.

Relationship/attitude towards Ments in general: Mostly just uncomfortable and wary around them. Sab doesn’t want her mind read, and she figures that no Ment wants to be forced to read it either. So she has a pretty strict “no Ments” rule for close personal relationships (excluding Nick, Sally, and Gray, of course. But only Nick really counts because he’s the only one who can hear her thoughts whenever she’s nearby). Not out of hatred or resentment, just because she knows it will be easier for everyone in the long run.

Do they have any other important relationships, past or present? (Relatives, friends, etc.?): Not many, but yes! Sab dated around a lot in the 2 years before Aeon (more like year and a half, because she completely shut it down once she was more focused on preparing for the MIV program), but there are 2 relationships that were formative/important for her. A high school sweetheart, and someone Sab met through modeling. She doesn’t keep up with her high school ex, but the model is her best friend outside of Sally and Nick, and they still keep in touch! I’m still developing them/the relationships, and I’ll probably post more about them someday. They’re fun!

PERSONAL BIO

Describe their personality: Confusing and contradictory. She has two main modes that confuse people who meet both (e.g., Kent). She’s either cold, stuck-up, and sometimes hostile, OR she’s charming, frivolous, and sometimes flirty. Mode 1 is tense but stoic and inexpressive; mode 2 is seemingly relaxed but very posed and insincere. Mode 1 is for when she feels uncertain or has no agenda apart from “get to point B”; mode 2 is for when she’s more comfortable or trying to manipulate someone. Her actual personality is a bit closer to the second, but she doesn’t pretend not take things seriously or hide when she’s annoyed.

Strengths: Analytical, methodical, detail-oriented. Very driven and hardworking. May not always act like it, but does have social skills/charisma; a great liar, if you can’t read her mind. Unfailingly loyal and loving to her favorite people, so so so warm and affectionate and supportive if she really loves you. Very perceptive.

Weaknesses: Way too proud. Can be petty and vindictive. Self-absorbed (she doesn’t mean anything by it, but it’s hard for her to see past herself sometimes). Stubborn, hates being wrong. And... emotional isn’t the word, but strong negative emotions can really cloud her judgement. It ties into her being proud, petty, and stubborn; if she’s really upset about something, she can cling to that emotion instead of re-evaluating it or moving forward.

Phobias: From this ask about the phobias that are planned to show up in-game, there are a few that I could see fitting Sab, but I want to wait to see how they’re implemented before I fully commit. Which is very metagame-y, I know (and I am very metagame-y about IF), but “fear of X” is so broad that it really does depend on when/how it manifests in the text.

That being said, agoraphobia is almost a lock; crowds do make Sab very anxious if she can’t keep track of everyone within a certain distance, and if she can’t leave when she starts feeling antsy. Claustrophobia is a maybe. The choice that triggers it (in chapter 4, about hating MRI machines) suits Sab, but I’m not sure if she hates MRI machines because she hates tight spaces, or if it’s more related to her general anxiety about hospitals, medical tests, etc. Which she definitely has!

What activities/club did they do in school?: She avoided anything group-oriented as far as possible. She took piano (maybe violin?) lessons and did recitals, but wasn’t in orchestra. The one exception was maybe National Honor Society or some equivalent, which she would have joined for her resume’s sake. And I think she would have tutored!

Where do they escape to when they need space?: A little used library corner, where she can people watch without being seen/heard.

How do they feel about/cope with their mind blindness?: Sab hates it but tries not to dwell on it. She knows that it’s no one’s fault, and she mainly just tries to... minimize it? Drown out her thoughts, limit her contact with Ments. And, least healthily, very rigidly managing herself. Because there’s so much of her that exists outside of herself, without her control, she tries to either filter or completely suppress everything else. Part of why she got into modeling, she can perform and be perfect and have total control over the final product of her body in the photographs for whatever campaign. Some Day This Will Be Better. But definitely not where she is in current canon.

How has your Button changed since the Incident with Hope?: Developed many new anxieties and disorders and syndromes :) She also became way more self-conscious, as in literally conscious of and way more tightly monitoring herself, what she’s thinking, what she’s expressing, how she’s sitting, etc. Less emotive face, more rigid posture.

If they weren’t an Aeon student, what would they be doing?: Sab would have beaten herself up forever if she “proved everyone right” by avoiding Unity/Ments entirely, so she’d want to stay in the family business somehow. She probably would have ended up doing scientific research on mental agility. Maybe even working for Mirrortech or some other biotech company, which I imagine would have been an interesting conversation to have with the family.

RANDOM FACTS:

Zodiac sign: Like I said, I assigned her Libra months ago for the sake of a template. But I don’t know enough about astrology to commit. Libra or Leo, probably.

Hobbies: Music, reading poetry, “cooking” (i.e., sitting on the counter and not helping while Nick makes dinner)

Likes: Watching other people (Nick) play video games, dressing up, taking long showers/baths, dark chocolate with caramel, back hugs

Dislikes: Being patronized, hot weather, going to the doctor, driving, doing anything she is not good at

Type of bedsheets: Bamboo.

Drink of choice: Cucumber mint lemonade! For hot drinks, some kind of caramel coffee. For alcohol, she refuses to get drunk because she’s terrified of having even less control of her mental broadcast, but at home/around people she trusts she’ll have a glass or two of wine. Doesn’t know enough to be picky, but doesn’t like it too sweet.

Favorite food: Probably some pasta dish Nick makes with asparagus and tomatoes and a lot of garlic.

Favorite color: Like a light turquoise!

Favorite music: Music to her was another mind-shielding tactic before anything else, so she tends to like upbeat-ish electronic/pop stuff. Catchy and repetitive, and/or with lots of personality to drown out her own thoughts. On the other end of the spectrum, she does have a soft spot for crackly, lo-fi, old or old-sounding slow songs—something about fuzzy recordings simulating a weak telepathic signal.

Favorite season: Hmm, spring and autumn are both good. She likes either side of winter.

Anything else you’d like to share: My heart and a long, fulfilling marriage, with anyone who reads all this 💍

#wow this is so long. insanity luv lit ral insanity #this was super helpful for articulating certain things about sab's character so it's already done its job #pls do not feel pressured to read Thousands of words about sabrina my beloved. but if you read all or even some of this <333 a kiss for you #why am i embarrassed to overshare about my own ocs on my own blog. i live here #oc: sabrina wiseman #also this was very much a stream of consciousness deal but i tried to go back and make it comprehensible. good luck all ye who enter here

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thesportssoundoff · 5 years

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What Happens When You Take A Bad Idea And Make It Worse? LET’S TALK ABOUT THE BRAWL FOR ALL!

Joey

March 11th

The Mother Fucking Brawl For All.

Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I'd actually get around to this but there are miracles around us and what better time than now? The Brawl For All is generally regarded as one of the worst ideas of all time in a business with an entire genre dedicated to grown men and women smashing each other with fluorescent light tubes and slamming one another on beds of nails and thumbtacks. In a business that up until the mid 80s featured nazis goose stepping around and up until 2003 or so regularly and routinely featured women wrestling in their bloomers, the Brawl For All is the one idea that every human being unanimously believes was a disastrous failure. It's the one unanimous tire fire that not even it's most ardent supporter can put out. Not even WCW's junkyard battle royale which featured multiple injuries due to WCW not gimmicking the cars and just having guys taking bumps onto cars and through glass windshields is hated this much. The Brawl 4 All is one of those things people can't even sum up with "It was bad!" and move on. You have to go through layers and layers and levels of badness. You have to view it almost as an affront to your sensibilities, as a personal attack on you as a fan. Hell not just as a fan but as a human being!

Vince McMahon and company have failed in previous ventures before and ventures after. The XFL, the World Bodybuilding Federation, the ECW relaunch, 65% of the undercard Attitude Era angles, their really expensive WWE Films attempts. Some could even argue that the brand split originally was a failure in some respects given that Smackdown never really got going on its own and Raw declined sharply from the brand split onward. That said those failures at least had SOME inkling and morsels of promise behind them. Not the Brawl For All. It was a bad idea from the start, a bad idea during and made even worse by what happened afterwards. Also? The Brawl For All is one of those things that every wrestling fan and every wrestling personality has a hard opinion on, the kind of shit that lends itself to so much gossip, rumor and conversation. Over the next few weeks, I want to discuss the Brawl 4 All a bit more. I want to delve into it because it's as close as we'll ever get to a universal no hope no spin failure by the WWE and because...well...it's one of my favorite fuck ups of all time. It's always been something that fascinated me from watching it live as a casual fan to laughing at it as a smart fan when I stumble across it to making a near yearly pilgrimage to youtube to watch every single fight of it I can find before it got yanked. It's one of those wrestling stinkers that like December 2 Dismember or the Heroes Of Wrestling card that I'm magnetically attracted to. Every wrestling fan FEELS for the Brawl For All even if those feelings are utter disdain for everyone involved with it.

The Concept And How Fucked It Was From Jump

To get why this even happened, you have to go back in a time capsule. Despite catching fire in 1998, the WWF (for the purpose of being as thorough as possible here, we're gonna call 'em as they were when this happened) is still struggling to keep track with WCW Nitro. They're in the midst of an 83 week long ass eating from Ted Turner's Atlanta based wrestling promotion and "good ideas" are running dry. Understand that at this point the WWF has the single hottest property in the business but that sole property isn't enough to get over the hump vs the NWO, the cruiserweights, an ascending Bill Goldberg, Bret Hart, the return of Sting and what was genuinely just a better overall card. Even if Wrestlemania 14 gave birth to so many great stories going forward (Austin vs McMahon, the hard reboot of DX as a faction, Kane vs Undertaker's first match), WCW is in the midst of its highest grossing year ever. Vince McMahon has James Harden putting up 50 points a night and winning on his back but he's still looking up to the Golden State Warriors. Making matters worse, both companies are in the pro wrestling equivalent of an arms race. Remember how when the UFC and Bellator in 2014 and 2015 signed anybody with a pulse because they were trying to fill up two insanely bloated schedules? It's a bit like that. Anybody who is good (and not a walking flag factory so to speak) is either in WWE or WCW at this point which means if you ONLY have two hours of content, you've got a lot of guys doing nothing.

The Brawl For All on its surface and without malice seems like an awful idea to try and remedy that. Pit sixteen dudes in a shoot tournament and let them go at it with set rules in place. It gets guys on TV, gives them something to do and at the end, in theory, the winner doesn't just get a big financial prize but come out in the end as a star. It's a chance to do something with a section of guys who are doing absolutely nothing at all. Sounds good, riiiiight? Well now let's break into some sexy rumor mongering about what this really was about:

-We can start with the mastermind! Vince Russo is the man who apparently concocted this concept which should be somewhat redeemable if what I laid out above was entirely 100% accurate. It's not entirely the case, even according to Russo's own words. Per Vince Russo, a large reason the Brawl For All came to be was that he had a beef with one of the wrestlers (Bradshaw aka John Bradshaw Layfield aka that guy who got flattened by ring announcer Joey Styles) consistently bloviating that he was the toughest guy in the locker room. Right off the jump, any sort of noble designs are whittled away. Now often in pro wrestling, there's 100 different stories to the same single event often shared by people IN the same room. Imagine how pronounced it is that a) everybody agrees that it was Russo's idea, b) everybody is under the impression that it was over a tiff with a pro wrestling with no shoot fighting experience and c) EVERYBODY agrees it was one of the worst concepts imaginable. The Brawl For All's entire seed was planted not so much out of a design to get guys work and on TV but out of wanting to see a loud dude get punched up. That's insanity out the gate.

-The Brawl For All was by invitation only and depending on who you believe, the process to select wrestlers was rather...exclusive. Bruce Prichard discusses in his podcast with Conrad Thompson that he was the guy who had to round up the talent to fill enough spots in the tournament. Prichard says he had to play to the egos of wrestlers and in a separate interview, Bart Gunn talks about how he got recruited basically by another member of the writing team as well. The name Bart Gunn will become pretty important down the line so jot that down in your notebooks real quick. Wrestlers were recruited with what seems like a pretty easy enough pitch and one I'd imagine that the UFC uses today with their fighters; basically a "I mean don't you believe you're the toughest dude here?!" and a "We'll pay you!" and we're off to the races. Despite this, the Brawl For All struggled to get people to fill in the spots in no small part due to the fact that no star is going to partake in an absolutely stupid concept like this when they can just make their money being a star. The Brawl For All isn't even a TUF; it's a PFL tournament where all the dudes nobody else wants are lumped into a tournament format with the golden carrot of a $100,000 prize at the end of it.

-Perhaps worth more than the $100,000 prize was the either legit or illegitimate golden carrot of the winner getting to work a program with "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. Understand that no one single act was as hot and drawing as much money at this time as Steve Austin was. He was the it guy, the biggest star in the business and noway near close to peaking as a talent either. The Brawl For All $100,000 prize? That's cool and all plus that was basically the downside guarantee for a year's worth of work. The opportunity to work with Stone Cold on a pay per view? That's the big money ticket. That's the opportunity to be a made man like how working with Hogan in the 80s was. For top guys, that opportunity may come along at any given point. Again going back a bit to TUF and the PFL, imagine if the UFC offered eight of its guys the chance to compete in a tournament for $100,000. Enticing! Now imagine the winner gets to fight Conor McGregor on a PPV. Tell me if it doesn't get every guy not named Khabib and Tony Ferguson jumping into it. That would be a great no doubt can't miss opportunity!

EXCEPT

-It was probably a lie. Scratch that. We can factually tell that any sort of Austin match for the winner was a lie since every person involved (sans one) says it was real and the winner never actually got said shot. Imagine if the tournament wasn't build on anything truthful but instead on a "The winner will be in the mix" from Dana White. While Bruce Prichard says there was no official plan for the winner to face Steve Austin, everybody else involved from talent to wrestling guru Jim Cornette seems to suggest there WAS a plan in place for the winner to win. That is, assuming of course, the winner was the guy they thought was going to win all along. More on that in the future but just know that the Brawl For All's fighters were flirted with a hush hush unofficial promise of facing Steve Austin that was probably never going to be fulfilled unless won by a specific party. Bart Gunn says he was told the winner would face Stone Cold and well....more on that at another time. Let's just say sports entertainment and combat sports have a long storied history of perhaps listening to the matchmakers a bit too closely.

-The rules for the Brawl For All? Well those were a mess. According to Bruce Prichard, the rules were still being worked out the week of. According to Steve Blackman (a dude who Bob Holly admits would've won the whole thing), there were plans to allow leg kicks and those rules just happened to get yanked the week of. The glove size seems to change depending on who you ask as the WWF says they were 16 ounce gloves but Bart Gunn argues repeatedly they were 22 ounce gloves. Some of the guys admittedly didn't even think it was a shoot fight either and at least one fighter fought thinking it was a work. According to Bart Gunn, even halfway through the tournament he kept expecting it to be a work suddenly. The "official" Brawl For All rules had points for takedowns, points for a knockdown and points for more punches thrown across three one minute rounds. The scorecard part doesn't even matter at this point. To be honest, it didn't even matter then.

So let's talk about the big problem here

So imagine putting together a tournament designed around the concept of "Who's the toughest guy!" in a show where the audience is conditioned to believe that the toughest guy is the world champion or if the champion is a heel, the toughest guy is the babyface chasing said champion. We already in theory know who the toughest guy is or at least we're willing to suspend our disbelief. Also if we're to believe that the winner of the tournament is the toughest guy in the company, why aren't the big name tough guys we've been told are the tough guys competing in it? The concept falls flat right there on its own but the hole isn't deep enough. We gotta go from six feet to nine feet so now imagine that you've come up with this concept that pees on the first rule of your product. Make it worse. Make it so that the audience is being told to believe that what they see HERE AND ONLY HERE is legitimate. NOTHING is as frustrating in pro wrestling as "a shoot." For those not addicted to sports entertainment meth, a shoot is something on the program that the audience is led to believe is real. Now for something to be "real" on a show that's already "real" then that in turn means what we're seeing is fake, right? So a "real fight" on pro wrestling ultimately means that what we're seeing is fake. Now most wrestling fans since the 70s and 80s have probably believed wrestling in some form or fashion is/was not real. We accept it as entertainment and as Jerry Jarrett once lovingly put it "theater of the illiterate." The key is to not remind us that what we're seeing is clearly fake (a problem wrestling fans seem to be having right now with Ronda Rousey). Reminding the audience that what they're saying is predetermined scripted fakeness and then asking them to invest into the REAL portion of the product that breaks their illusion only works if a star is doing it. It doesn't work if a bunch of random dudes and mid carders are doing it. Imagine if in the middle of one of those UFC Embedded gimmicks, we saw Conor McGregor rehearsing the press conference lines and then he went out to try and sell his beef with Cowboy Cerrone as legitimate. You've already hurt the audience's feelings and the Brawl For All actively did that at a time where all WWF fans wanted was to watch Stone Cold kick ass and DX make inappropriate jokes. You've brought DOWN the segment.

So now we're nine feel into the hole. Let's go sixteen feet deep. Nope! Let's go from here to fuckin' middle earth on this bad boy; pro wrestling is a TEAM effort. It requires two or more able bodied people to work together to create a magnificent fake fight spectacle that tells a story and ends with you becoming emotionally invested in its finish and what's to come. That requires participation. Now come up with a tournament where guys are going to beat the holy shit out of one another FOR REAL and then have to go back to participating with one another as if nothing happened! Every single wrestler involved in the Brawl For All has spoken about the bad blood and residual effects the Brawl For All had. Also remember these are not trained fighters either. Some of these guys are amateur wrestlers who probably haven't done that for years. Some dudes dabbled in kickboxing or BJJ on their spare time or in years outside of wrestling had some formal combat sports . Some of these guys were bodybuilders by trade and some of these dudes were just pro wrestlers who happened to have a few "So and so cleaned out a bar room with one hand and six beers!" type magical fishing trip stories. So you're taking a bunch of ego driven (some chemically enhanced) guys and sending them out there to beat each other up on a Monday or a Tuesday and then magically get over it in time to make the house show loop where they're going to team together. We've officially come out the other end through China, folks.

And yet despite all of this very obvious right in front of our faces warning signs, the Brawl For All existed.

Next time we'll talk about who was in it a bit more---and why IF the Brawl For All had a true tertiary motive designed to elevate one guy to superstardom, it was an even bigger failure than humanly possible.

#MMA #WWF #WWE #The Fuckin' Brawl For All

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futureparent · 6 years

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Prompts

Some of these are original, some are from things I’ve seen in life. Feel free to use and repost!

These are in no particular order just how I came up with them and wrote them down.

Some of these contain swears

There are 167 of these just be warned. Sorry not sorry. Ignore the weird spacing, my computer is being weird.

1) “I don’t exactly hate you but if you were on fire and I had a cup of water, I would drink it”

2) (in response to getting injured) “You wound me. Literally. You just actually wounded me”

3) “Oops?”

4) “Shock me - say something intelligent”

5) “I think you’ve mistaken me for someone who gives a fuck”

6) “I’m sorry for hurting your feelings, but I thought you already knew you were stupid”

7) “What is this? Let’s get away with murder club”

8) “Fight me!”

9)�� “Isn’t your arm broken?” “Possibly”

10) “Want to see what kind of trouble we can get into?”

11) “It’s a Tuesday, I know how to restrain myself”

12) “Are you clinically insane or just incredibly annoying?”

13) “I feel like I got hit by a car”

14) “So, why did I have to punch that guy?”

15) “I hope you know my name is actually ...”

16) “So, what if I broke my arm, I’m still doing it”

17) “Ignore him, he’s just lonely”

18) “I’m not cute and adorable, I’m terrifying and ferocious”

19) “I warned you, I’m an asshole”

20) “I am a five-foot one-inch ball of pure rage!”

21) “Do the thing!”

22) “Imma do the thing!” “Don’t do the thing” “I’m gonna do the thing”

23) “Did you forget your line?”

24) *sighs dramatically* “Line!”

25) “Are you sure you want to do this?” “No, not really, But I never am and I’m not gonna start now.”

26) “I have a plan” “A successful plan that won’t end in embarrassment and/or detention?” “I have no plan”

27) “Hi, uh sorry, this is awkward but, that’s my seat?”

28) “You are a crazy ball of contradictions, aren’t you?”

29) “It's a beautiful day to give me money”

30) “Don’t touch anything”

31) “Hang on, let me out in some pants”

32) “Sometimes it physically pains me to hold back my sarcastic comments”

33) “Okay old man”

34) “I’d rather face death”

35) “Did I stutter?”

36) “Get on with it already”

37) “It’s not funny”

38) “Hey. Hey, you’re okay. I’m okay. We are all okay”

39) “That is a terrible, horrible, incredibly foolish idea. Let’s do it and see what happens”

40) “I hate you” “Why? I’m lovely”

41) “Weren’t you trying to kill me three minutes ago?”

42) “Bite me”

43) “Shh... Let me wear your shirt in peace”

44) “Who are you? And is that my shirt?”

45) “What? Sorry, I do my best to block out the stupid around me’”

46) “What would you do if I kissed you right now?”

47) “What would you do if I punched you right now?”

48) “We aren’t dating but I’m going to randomly kiss you”

49) “Are you- are you flirting with me?”

50) “Is that what you call flirting?”

51) “I never imagined myself in a dress”

52) “That’s not a good sign”

53) “I’m channeling my inner white girl”

54) “What are you so afraid of?”

55) “Do you trust me?” “No” “Smart”

56) “Why are your hands (color)?” “That is a very good question”

57) “This is hard”

58) “Respect existence or expect resistance”

59) “you’re a psychopath” “I prefer creative”

60) “Well, you can’t plan a murder out loud”

61) “Why are you so quiet?”

62) “Why are you so loud?’

63) “Wha- what, what is this?”

64) “Are you sure you two aren’t married?”

65) “Why can’t they see they’re meant to be?”

66) “We are dating now. You have no choice in the matter”

67) “So... wanna make out?”

68) “Your lips taste like coffee”

69) “It’s an experiment!”

70) “For science!”

71) “Oh! That was why you were laughing. I thought there was a donkey hidden somewhere”

72) “You might be an idiot, but you’re my idiot”

73) “Let’s cuddle”

74) “You lied to my face”

75) “Just shut up already”

76) “Right now, I don’t know if I want to kiss you, or shove you off a cliff”

77) “Growing up is overrated”

78) “On a scale of one to ten how likely are you to date me?”

79) “You are necessary. I need you”

80) “Do you really need all that candy?”

81) “Do you really need to ask?”

82) “Are you sure I can’t punch them in the face? Not even just a little?”

83) “Have you ever loved someone so much it actually hurt?”

84) “I trusted you” “Well then you can’t really blame me, can you? It was your mistake”

85) “Their crying what do I do” “Comfort them” “How do I do that?”

86) “So, I kind of think that there is a 327% chance that I’m in love with you”

87) “No?”

88) “Hi? Hi?!? All you can say is Hi?!?”

89) “I am not wearing enough clothes for this”

90) “Fuck it”

91) “Could you possibly be any stupider?”

92) “Is there any chance you could, I don’t know, not?”

93) “How about no?”

94) “Finally!”

95) “Why won’t they/you just kiss already?”

96) I’m going to make them realize their feelings for each other if it’s the last thing I do”

97) “Is this one of those times you want me to lie to protect your delicate emotions?”

98) “Remove you hand or I will rip your arm off and beat you to death with it”

99) “Your hair is so soft”

100) “Come here, you can sit in my lap until I’m done working”

101) “Look, I know we don’t know each other that well, but I’m worried about you. No one deserves to be alone”

102) “you’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this”

103) “I’ve had a rough day and all I want right now is someone to cuddle with me”

104) “Have I ever told you how much I love you?”

105) “It’s too early for this?”

106) “But then I’d have to put pants on”

107) “You are bleeding all over my carpet”

108) “You broke it didn’t you?”

109) “I miss(ed) you”

110) “I’ve missed this”

111) “Is that/this really necessary?”

112) Are you my parent or my s/o?”

113) “Don’t make me come over there”

114) “No seriously, I do not want to get up”

115) “I think I might be pregnant”

116) “Guess what, there’s a baby in me!” *Jazz hands*

117) “I want to marry you”

118) “Let’s do something crazy”

119) “Really is that the best you could do?”

120) “Is that really the best you could come up with?”

121) “What even are we?”

122) “I give up”

123) “Leave me alone”

124) ” I’m not in the mood right now”

125) “If you want to talk, talk”

126) “I may not look it, but I am listening”

127) “Just because I act like I don’t care, doesn’t mean I don’t care”

128) “Why are you always so grouchy?” “Allergies” What are you allergic to?” “Positivity”

129) “I’m getting real tired of having to pretend to care”

130) “With this smile, I can get away with everything”

131) “Sometimes memories are the worst form of torture”

132) “Judge if you want, we’re all going to die. I just intend to deserve it”

133) “Excuse me, I have to go a scene”

134) “Y’know, that’s not what an apology sounds like”

135) “Don’t mind me, I’ll just be having an existential crisis in the corner”

136) “This is my life now. I have climbed this hill and now I shall die upon it” “Shut up, we’ve only been hiking for twenty minutes”

137) “You are an insult away from starting a war”

138) “Literally everything about this is illegal”

139) “I had a thought” “Oh no”

140) “Oh boy”

141) “Your imperfections are perfect to me”

142) “You are necessary. I need you”

143) “You seem so nice, but you are so evil. How?” “People are willing to do things for you if you’re polite’

144) “Oh my gosh that would look so cute on you”

145) “Oh, my profanity is offensive? So is your sensitive fucking nature, so we’re even”

146) “You are currently crushing my spleen” “You don’t even know where your spleen is”

147) “Why are you hiding behind me? What did you do?”

148) “You scared me!” “Well I am naturally terrifying”

149) “You scared me, I thought I lost you”

150) “Don’t you ever don’t that again”

151) “Put some pants on, we’re going on”

152) “I’d take a bullet for you, you know that” “You’re immortal, and I’m going to kill you if you keep saying that”

153) “That has got to be the worst pick-up line in existence” “Don’t worry. That’s just plan A” “What’s plan B?” “To take you hostage”

154) “Keep your morals away from me”

155) “Lie!” “I – what?” “Lie, what you just said, it isn’t true”

156) “You are the worst human being on the face of the planet” “Thanks. Anyway...”

157) “Are you ... crying?”

158) “Stop glaring it was just a suggestion”

159) “Have I ever thanked you for being my friend?” “Uh, no, but tha- ““Good”

160) “Are you even listening to me?”

161) “I have never been so in love before”

162) “My god I love you/them”

163) “Fuck!” “What’s wrong?”

164) “I’m pretty sure I’m in love. Dammit!”

165) “I’m sick, therefore I don’t have to deal with you bullshit today”

166) “Go bother someone else today”

167) “I’m just going to walk away now”

#Prompt #Prompts #writing #writing prompts #prompt list #writing prompt list #writing list #ideas #writing ideas #have fun

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mackloveswriting · 6 years

Text

Prompts

I decided to go ahead and publish my prompt list. I will probably add more later but as of right now, these are what I have. I will always accept your own plot and everything like that.

1. "What do you mean, work with him?"

2. "Cookies? Your bribing me with cookies? I mean they're good but not that good."

3. "He's right behind me, isn't he?"

4. "I heard that!"

5. "Do you trust me?"

6. "You're insane!"

7. "It takes a very broken, twisted soul to do what you did."

8. "How long have you been standing there?"

9. "Shut up!"

10. "I thought you were my friend!"

11. "I'm in love with you. Don't you get it?"

12. "When did you become so smart?"

13. "I can't take you anywhere. You want to start fighting someone."

14. "Babe, stop looking at me like that."

15. "Oh, sorry I wasn't specific enough."

16. "Why are you glaring at me."

17. "I'm trying to have a serious conversation with you!"

18. "Why aren't you afraid of me?"

19. "I hate you!"

20. "Right now, I don't know if I wanna kiss you or shove you off a bridge."

21. "I am way to sober for this."

22. "You love her don't you."

23. "I'd take a bullet for you."

24. "You're not as evil as people think you are."

25. "Are you sure I can't punch him in the face?"

26. "Was that suppose to hurt?"

27. "On a scale from one to ten, how bad do you think It would be if-"

28. "I made you breakfast, I know it's just a bowl of cereal but it's the only thing I can't burn."

29. "You scared me!"

30. "Did you just agree with me?"

31. "I never stood a chance, did I?"

32. "I worked so hard to be where I am now and I'm not going to let someone take that from me!"

33. "You think you're broken when you're just the bad guy."

34. "You don't remember?"

35. "I wanna cuddle."

36. "Do you love me?"

37. "Why did you have to drink so much?"

38. "He's not gonna hurt you. Not while I'm here."

39. "I'm sorry for being.. what I was before."

40. "You're a monster."

41. "I never wanna see you again!"

42. "Tell me you love me."

43. "Can I kiss you?"

44. "Stop asking permission."

45. "You're lying."

46. "Did you ever love me?"

47. "Be honest for once in your life."

48. "Can we make out?"

49. "I don't party."

50. "Why can't you respect that?"

51. "I'm just... not ready."

52. "I'm scared! Don't you get that?"

53. "He's not just a bad boy, he's a bad guy and I don't wanna be with the bad guy."

54. "So, that's a 'no'?"

55. "Get out!"

56. "I don't get why I'm to blame."

57. "You're a douchebag."

58. "I am here to protect you."

59. "That's not what an apology sounds like."

60. "Why would you love me?"

61. "You bug me, weirdo."

62. "You deserve better than me."

63. "I couldn't protect you."

64. "I don't want better than you! I want you."

65. "Because you might not like what you see and I can't lose you."

66. "This isn't my first time dealing with people like you."

67. "You're my drug."

68." He was worse than any drug."

69. "t's like a disease, it's like I'm infected by him."

70. "Are you doing drugs?"

71. "Ew, gross."

72. "I hate you so much!"

73. "I should hate you."

74. "No, you don't."

75. "Are you sure you wanna do this?"

76. "Why do I have to love him?"

77. "Leave me alone!"

78. "You're a freaking monster! I hate you!"

79. "Are you serious right now?"

80. "Why did you cheat on me with my best friend?"

81. "I'm not pushing you away!"

82. "I'm afraid that if you see the real me, you won't like what you see."

83. "I spent the whole middle school trying to get rid of the real me."

84. "You're perfect."

85. "I'm in need of coffee."

86. "Can I sleep over?"

87. "Movie night?"

88. "I need you to need me back!"

89. "It doesn't matter, cause in the end it all hurts the same."

90. "I'm so in love with you and I can't do anything about it!'

91. "I've been trying to push down how I feel but it is impossible."

92. "I should hate you so much, but I can't bring myself to hate you."

93. "Can I try something?"

94. "You're such a freak!"

95. "I'm your freak." 96. "I know that deep down, below that cold dark exterior there is a actual human soul."

97. "I know that your bad boy image is just an act, you don't have to hide around me."

98. "I'm sorry, no one should go through that."

99. "But that's no excuse to what you did."

100. "I'll always be here for you, but I can't look at you the same."

101. "You need help!" 102. "Please!"

103. "I want to shout it from the rooftops."

104. "Why do we have to hide?"

105. "I don't like all the sneaking around."

106. "Are you ashamed of me?" 107. "I don' deserve you at all, I can't understand why you picked me."

108. "Why don't you love me like that?"

109. "I'm never the one."

110. "He doesn't love me like he loves her."

111. "Who did that to you?"

112. "Did he touch you?"

113. "Is that a bruise?"

114. "Did you get hurt?"

115."you got hurt because of me."

116. "I could never blame you because it was never your fault."

117. "We're the cutest."

118. "I think we're end game."

119. "I'm Pregnant."

120. "No one really likes you."

121. "You don't think that I'm adorable?"

122. "He has a big head already."

123. "There is no way you're a virgin."

124. "Can we do this again?"

125. "How stupid do they think I am?"

126. "There is no way that he didn't cheat, his ex could not sleep over without them having sex."

127. "I'm failing everything."

128. "Can we talk about us?"

129. "I have a surprise."

130. "I-I thought you were breaking up with me.."

131. "I would never hurt you."

132. "Did you think that I would hit you?"

133. "I wanted you t fight for me."

134. "Do not disrespect me."

135. "I know you're not that guy."

136. "You sleep around, and you expect me to believe that you love me?"

137. "I don't even know that person anymore."

138. "How can you throw everything away like it's nothing to you?"

139. "I need you to be safe and being with me does the exact opposite."

140. "You're way more experienced than me."

Song Prompts

Tell me you love me - Demi Lovato

Hurricane - Luke combs

Think of you - Chris Young

She didn't have time - Terri Clark

Because of you - Kelly Clarkson

Like I loved you - Brett Young

If it wasn't for me - Brieanna James

In case you didn’t know - Brett Young

Good Girls - 5sos

Amnesia - 5sos

She looks so perfect - 5sos

Here without you - 3 doors down

Never know - Why don't we

Nobody gotta know - Why don't we

Sad song - We the kings

Heartbreak story - The wanted

Marry me - Train

She's in love with the boy - Trisha Yearwood

All in my head - Tori Kelly

Meanwhile back at mama's - Tim McGraw

Like we never loved at all - Faith Hill

My heart is - Tiffany Alvord

Unforgettable - Thomas Rhett

Die a Happy man - Thomas Rhett

Not meant to be - Theory of a Deadman

You are in love - Taylor Swift

Clean - taylor swift

Wildest dreams - taylor swift

Cold as you - taylor swift

Enchanted - taylor swift

Mine - Taylor Swift

Gorgeous - Taylor Swift

End Game - Taylor Swift

Delicate - Taylor Swift

Stay - Sugarland

If you only knew - shinedown

The weight - Shawn Mendes

Life of the party - Shawn Mendes

Like I did - Shane Harper

Ghost of you - Selena Gomez

Bang Bang bang - Selena Gomez

Sober - Selena Gomez

My heart can't tell you no - Sara Evans

A little bit stronger - Sara Evans

Take your time - Sam Hunt

Make you miss me - Sam hunt

Cop car - Sam hunt

Mess this up - Ryan Robinette

Yours - Russell Dickerson

Going out like that - Reba McEntire

Consider me gone - Reba McEntire

Lonely Call - Raelynn

Perfect - One Direction

Does he know? - One Direction

You and I - One Direction

Love you goodbye - One Direction

Break up with him - Old Dominion

You and Me - Niall Horan

Slow Hands - Niall Horan

This Town - Niall Horan

To much to ask - Niall Horan

On the loose - Niall Horan

Whoever broke your heart - Murphy Elmore

Tin man - Miranda Lambert

Kerosene - Miranda Lambert

Like I'm gonna lose you - Meghan Trainer

Someone else calling you baby - Luke Bryan

Crash my party - Like Bryan

Back to you - Louis Tomlinson

Greatest love story - Lanco

Need you now - Lady Antebellum

Legends - kelsea Ballerini

Peter Pan - Kelsea Ballerini

Never again - Kelly Clarkson

Teenage Dream - Katy Perry

The one that got away - Katy Perry

Used to love you sober - Kane Brown

Fall - Justin Bieber

The truth - Jason Aldean

Laughed until we cried - Jason Aldean

I got the boy - Jana Kramer

Why ya wanna - Jana Kramer

Shy - jai waetford

Getting over you - Jackie Lee

Personal - HRVY

I hate u, I love u - Olivia O'Brien

Out loud - Gabbie Hanna

Perfect - Ed sheeran

My girl - Dylan Scott

Human Diary - Daniel Bradberry

#prompt #imagines #dialogue #dialouge prompt #song prompt

51 notes · View notes

iammarylastar · 6 years

Photo

3. Back to the U.S.

I’m dead. After I’ve travelled more than half of the world, I’ve finally reached Washington. So much wasted time which had kept me away from Angie, more than 10 fucking months. It already took me forever to heal from my wounds and be able to walk again. Thanks to the help and good care of Mikomi.

Hope. That’s what her name meant. That’s what she gave me. That’s what helped me to stay alive, what gave me the strength to go on, along with the sweet memories of Angie’s face.

Hope is exactly what left me as I put my feet on the ground. Sacred ground of United States of America. The land that bore me. And Angie. Maybe my child if I’m lucky.

I left Mikomi and her dad, on a fishing boat heading to China. Not really, in those times of war, Japanese and Chinese were like cats and dogs. I’m already lucky I landed on that tiny island where Sensei and his people lived like in the 17th century, they even don’t have electricity. They live in their own world, far from the war.

The ship’s master kicked me out on a Chinese island in the middle of nowhere in the East China Sea, then I sailed from tiny islands to tiny islands until I reached China.

I managed to find a cargo ship heading to America. U.S.A. Read on my lips: U.S.A. My Japanese was quite decent, but my Chinese totally non-existent and I I swear when I found out I’d landed in California, I cried my eyes out. Fucking fate.

My original plan was to land somewhere on the East Coast, then ride a train, a bike or a fucking horse to Washington, where I could gather clues to find out what had happened to Angie. Or Jessie. I was even ready to face Gessepp again if he was back in the Mother land and beg him on my knees, even kiss his bloody ass to know where she lived.

I ’d rather ask the War Department which was supposed to have all the slightest information available about that damn war, all the shit about our base included.

I struggled so much to make myself understood on that Chinese pier, unable to even write U.S.A. with current letters, those damn Chinese hieroglyphs still totally unknown to me. My face lightened at the sweet and weird sound, rolling off that Asian’ s tongue:

“America? Yes, there!” OK, he didn’t really say that, but enthusiastically nodded his head, pointing at a big ship. My tired brain was so relieved and happy that it assumed the boat was heading to the East Coast. Fuck. Me.

San Francisco was beautiful though but I didn’t have time for tourism. I had to survive, find a job to have money, clothes and somewhere to sleep. I did dirty jobs, exhausting physical works; I was alternatively a beggar, a cow boy, a farm hand, a thief, whatever I could do to earn my keep. Keep going. Keep walking. Keep dreaming of Angie and my baby. I made my way across the country, heading East by foot, sometimes hitchhiking, sneaking into a freight train when I was lucky. I never rested, I never stopped, until I finally reached Washington.

Now, I’m losing my nerves at the War Dept, South East Asia sector office, biting my lips bloody as the bitch in front of me repeats her shit for the umpteenth time.

“I’m sorry, but it’s classified as…”

“ I don’t give a fuck about classified! I risked my goddamn life in Japan to save your bloody American ass, I’ve travelled the whole country by foot to be here, so just give me the fucking answer I need! Where is She?? ”

She startles as I slam violently my palm on the desk, marking each word I’m barking so I’m sure she fucking gets the point. I’m aware the whole hall turns silent and feel a thousand sets of eyes stabbing my back but I don’t care. I keep staring at her with a murderous glare, leaning half my upper body over the desk, pointing a threatening forefinger to her face.

I’ve wasted a whole week, getting sent from offices to offices, from stupid to haughty or suspicious secretaries, claiming I had no appointment, no military ID, no reason to be here.

Fuck me I have all the reasons to be here. I have one. I lost the love of my life and my survival, the only chance I get to have her back, depends on you, bitch! But all I’ve earned by now are closed doors and mouths.

Oh, I forgot, one smart ass asked me if I was a deserter, another told me that I could be stamped “fit for duty” if I couldn’t submit any evidence of a “serious injury”. I laughed so hard she almost sent me to an insane asylum.

The truth is there’s nothing to be happy about. Angelina McCarthy just doesn’t exist in their files, all that’s Colonel Gessepp related is marked secret. Mac, Louie, Phil and myself are MIA, assumés KIA, end of story.

“Sir, I’m asking you to step back and calm down or I’ll call the security guards.” The frightened bitch barely whispers, swallowing hard. Jesus I wish she would choke on her spit.

Two shadows appear behind my back and I feel defeated, I know that being thrown to jail is not the best option to get Angie back.

“OK…” I drop my head and lean my hands on the desk for a second, waiting for the weakness in my knees and the bile rising in my throat to pass.

“FUCK!” I grip and pull on my hair as I howl in frustration, kicking out the chair I was supposed to sit on.

I told you I’m dead. This is the end of the road. No hope left. I could knock at every single door across the whole country, asking for Angie, looking for her but I’m so tired. I just want to lie down on the ground, curl up like a baby and sleep for the next 50 years.

“CUP! CUUUP!” A scream. A call. A female voice. I turn around to the sound, terrified by what I’m about to face. Who I am about to face. That’s not Angie’s voice, I’m sure of it, though her voice could have changed, by dint of cries.

My sight is still blurry with tears and rage, but a woman is running towards me, calling my name out loud.

I have no choice but let the hysterical stranger jump on me, kiss my face and hug me, her face widened in shock that I was back from the dead. Which I actually am.

“Oh Jesus, Cup, is it really you?” She asks between cries, patting my cheeks and shoulders.

I know that voice. I know those hands. Stop crying on my chest so I can see your face. I gently pull the woman back to study her face. I lost some parts of my life because of the crash, but not her. Debrah.

“Step back guys. It’s OK. He’s with me.” She orders to the guards who surround us, waving her ID card that proved she works here.

“ Cup, what the fuck happened to you? We all thought you were dead.”

“Yeah, I thought it myself. But I survived. But tell me, please Deb, tell me about Angie. Is she safe? Does she live here in America?”

“Come with me. We need to talk. We need a drink. You need to know.” She states, grabbing my hand and dragging me outside.

It was a long talk. A fucking long disaster. I wish I haven’t survive just to hear this. And the dozen of cups of coffee I downed hasn’t helped me to calm my nerves.

“ We all waited for your plane to come back. Everything was ready for the wedding. Angie has been waiting for you in her wedding dress for hours. All eyes scrutinized the skies until dark. Past midnight, we lost hope. It’s been too long. You were supposed to be back around 5, and for the first hours, it was still OK. You never know how long a mission could last. The crowd started to leave but I stayed with her. And Mac and Phil’s girlfriends. Then it was done. The other pilots stated you should be lost, crashed, that at this time the plane was out of gas anyway.”

“ Two engines died, there was no chance to fly back. I don’t know what happened to the others.” I explain.

“ There must be survivors, the lifeboat was found few days later. Empty. I’m sorry Cup.”

As sad as I feel knowing that my bros were likely dead, there’s only one life I want to hear about.

“Gessepp showed up on the tarmac and dismissed everyone, yelling the party was over. He summoned Angie to go home but she didn’t budge. She has stood up there, clung to her bride’s bouquet for 3 days. She never cried.” “ She broke down the morning of the third day, dissolved in tears. Jessica came to bring her home and she has disappeared for weeks. I tried to visit her, despite my fear of the Colonel, but nobody answered at the door. Marla managed to have some news but they were so bad. As expected, she was devastated. She stopped talking, stopped eating and was just waiting to die of grief.”

As Debrah goes on speaking, I feel my chest tightening, my heart crying as bad as my eyes. Angie, my love letting herself starve, willing to die. No. Please no.

“After a month, the doc forced her to the hospital. That’s where they found out… Oh Cup, how could I tell you?” Debrah wipes her tears and grabs my hands.

“She was pregnant, wasn’t she?” I knew it from the beginning, I knew about my baby girl. Oh fuck, a month of starvation and grief should have killed them both.

“Yes, how do you know about that?” I can’t answer but try a shy smile. I felt it. I knew.

“She was so weak but the baby made it. She decided to live for that. To have your baby, so you would be alive somehow. We were just a few in the secret, she made me swear to never tell anyone.”

My face lightens at the news, but Debrah bursts into more tears and tries to speak between sobs and cries.

“ She resumed eating and gained weight back. It was hard without you but she managed to smile, laughed sometimes. She was on her second trimester when… When…”

“What? Fuck Deb, what happened?” I’m losing my mind. I know it’s bad, I know the story will end with my baby… gone but I need to hear it from her mouth.

She covers her face with her palms, leaving mines naked and cold.

“ She started to show and… Gessepp… he found out she was pregnant. He lost his shit and turned furious. It was Sunday, we were having a picnic after the office. He barged in in the meadow next to the church, totally enraged, calling her a whore and all that shit, saying you lied and fucked her before marriage. He was screaming like a damned maniac, and…” Her cries increase and she has to gasp for air before she’s able to speak again.

“He beat her up, Jesus, he couldn’t stop yelling and kicking her belly. Some guys tried to intervene and protect Angie but he threatened them to death, yelling he was a fucking Colonel and that nobody could get in his way without paying the consequences.”

Tell me about it. That’s exactly what he said to me that day he almost killed Angie at the café. And I cowardly stayed still and denied my love for her. I’m biting my lips so hard I taste my own blood.

“He even told the pastor to go fuck himself. He grasped Angie and dragged her through the meadow, leaving all the church members in shock.”

OK. I got it. Stop it there. I don’t want to hear what’s next. My jaws are clenched, my fist balled so tightly my nails are piercing my palms. But she keeps talking.

“The next day, knowing that Gessepp had a meeting with the Defense Staff, we went to his home. Jess opened the door, she’s been beaten up too. We brought them both to the Army hospital, begging the docs to keep them safe from him. But at night, he arrived, enraged like a bull, hit some nurses and tried to choke Angie. It took 3 docs to snatch Angie from his claws and finally a nurse stabbed a hypo in his thigh which knlcked him out for a while.”

Hearing that motherfucker was out comforts me just a bit. I would have given anything to be there and finish him off. But I’m still worried to death about Angie. And Jessie. And little Abi.

“What happened next nearly blow up the whole base. The case got back to the top of Gessepp’s hierarchy. The docs testified, Angie and Jess testified, we all did. Gessepp couldn’t remain unpunished for what he’s done. He got arrested and impeached for his indecent behaviour, ashamed and kicked out of the Corps of the Army. All of us who testified were held incommunicado and offered a job at home, that’s how I ended up in Washington.”

Jesus. I’ve held my breath for too long. I need a break, I need a drink, but above all I need to know more about Angie. I rub my face vigorously, then scratch my beard, giving Debrah some time to gather herself.

“And the baby?” I whisper.

“Cup, honey, I’m so sorry. I don’t know. Angie and Jess left within the week. Back to the States, but nobody knows where exactly, to keep them safe from Gessepp. All I know is that she had to stay in hospital, she suffered bad bleeding… Oh Cup don’t hate me for telling you all that.”

“The military Court suggested Jessica to ask for divorce and the full custody of Abigail, which she accepted. They provided adequate resources for her and Abi, for damages and official apologizes for letting Gessepp act with complete impunity for too long. Me and the girls at the office made false certificates so Angie could benefit widow’s pension, making sure she would be free for rant.”

Jesus all that shit makes me want to puck out.

“Think Cup, think. I’m sure she’s somewhere waiting for you. You guys are made for each other. We became close friends after you… vanished. She talked to me. She loves you Cup, she’ll never stop, baby or not.”

I shake my head no and drop it between my hands. I’m too devastated to think, too tired to keep hope.

Debrah moves to sit next to me and gently grabs my chin and lifts it up to search my gaze.

“Honey, I know what’s like to be crazy about you. I was not the one for you, but Angie is your soulmate. You know it. Promise me to find her.”

I finally look up at her, we dated for a while when she worked in the base. She was pretty disappointed when I broke up for another chick. I now realize what prick I’d been.

“I’m sorry Deb. Sorry if I hurt you.”

“Nah it’s good. I found a good guy to forget you. I got married last year.” She smiles heartily. “ You deserve to be happy. With her. You know her by heart. If you were her, where would you settle down? Did she have any family? Friends? Relatives?”

“No. Nobody. She had just Jessie and Abi. And me.”

Poor me. I’ve never felt so alone. You know, like the entire world thinks you’re dead and you’re not but you have no chance to spread the news. Debrah is basically the only human being who knows about me. And that’s freaking terrifying. My fingers are fidgeting on their own, rubbing circles on the tattoo on my wrist. Mikomi. Hope. I swore I wouldn’t give up, so think Cup, think.

“Did you plan to live somewhere? I’m pretty sure you talked about what you’d want to do when the war ends.”

I stiffen, yes we did talk about it. Our dreams, on our first date.

She wanted to be a teacher. I planned to go back home, to take over the family business. The farm where I grew up.

Fuck me. I jump out of my chair, ready to sprint my final stretch.

I’m back, Alabama.

@captstefanbrandt @kenzieam @tigpooh67 @red-diary @jaicourtneyseyes @dreamersdreamlife @narfea @nickysurfer28 @jojuarez26 @kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @every-jai @smartieblue22 @@bookgirlsthing @athe-krieger-der-elemente @writingismyhappytime @lunaschild2016 @wolfie-132 @bookwarm85 @knittingmad @serride @pauwa85 @onceinamillionlifetimes @sajess98 @carlos8989 @books-and-sin @pathybo

#Jai Courtney #hope #morning cup #angelina jolie #broken #fanfiction

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