#I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE CONCERT NEXT MONTH OH MY GOD IT'S IN LIKE 3/4 WEEKS NOW ONLY WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK
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started rereading the pjo series the other day actually wawawa still my favorite fr it means the world to me :(( but yeah also! rewatched big hero 6 and ngl it probably really is my favorite movie for many personal reasons hehe AND THEN also watched the first part of hamilton on tv w my parents they loved it hehehe
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#okay that's all just a quick update on me and my life since i loveee to share all that#OKAY OKAY THOUGH YEAH i really love my (extended) family. i am super shy but you know what i love them sooo much#i already miss my aunt so much sniffs the whole holy week break felt like a dream tbh. i loved that she came over and etc etc#and also brought her (GAY !!) friend and then idk she's the best and so supportive and i came out to her right. first one irl. means a lot.#but yeah having experiences w her (esp her gay guy friend tho) meant a lot to me LMFAO idk it feels like those. crush feels but platonic#anyway <3 idk what else. uhm. yeah. that's basically it#oh an old friend from middle school dmned me bcs my personal instagram note was a rainbow flag and heart face so . yk#i came out to them back then and they're on the lgbtq community too so HELL YEAH sorry it's been days tho and i haven't replied back aha#you see. i am a mess. i haven't gotten to a lot of stuff especially because i for some reason have this. i need to. you see#i need to... if i am doing something i have to put in All My Effort. so i am literally reading everything my teachers give and say#and. literally everything. and i am definitely FAR far away from getting near to finished but hell yeah RAGHHH#I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE CONCERT NEXT MONTH OH MY GOD IT'S IN LIKE 3/4 WEEKS NOW ONLY WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK#my dad has been listening to the 1975 tons (he said he has now listened to all their songs. idk if thats true but i think so)#idk yeah just makes me happy uh etc love family etc motivated but a mess uh etc. goodnight
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Number 13 please? I love sickfics!
here is a short little sick/comfort blurb for ya 😍
"I don't feel so good."
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Jacob was bounding across the tarmac, suitcases flying behind him. After one long movie shoot and a never ending press tour he was finally home.
You stood giddy, watching him step closer and closer to car you waited outside of. Ever since he left to film, Jacob phoned every day, dreaming up plans with you for when he landed home again. There were countless dinners and dates and trips he couldn't wait to make happen with you, and it was finally time.
"My love!" You called, when he was finally in ear shot. Jacob halted his luggage by the tires of your car and swept you into an embrace that sent your heart fluttering. You hugged him back and let him lift your feet off the ground and rushed to stand and face him when you registered his sniffles.
"Miss me that much?!" You cooed. Jacob's eyes were red and misty, and then he spoke.
"Well duh. But... I don't feel so good." The poor guys voice was worn and you could tell now that there was a pallor to his face.
"Oh babe, come on let's get you home." You pet his face and watched as he grumbled in frustration, still keeping a hold of you.
"But we have reservations tonight. I really want to take you out. It's been too long-" Jacob whined and sniffled.
"Hey, s'okay. We can still make up for lost time without big plans. Don't argue! Get in the car, you poor tired thing." With a nudge, you directed your boy to head to the passenger seat while you snatched his luggage before he could reach it.
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That night you whipped up a cocktail of cold remedies, drew a bath that was probably too hot, and dotted on Jacob's every move.
"S'just a cold love, I'm not a cripple or something." Jacob laughed a stuffy chuckle as you presented him with a warm pair of joggers and an old concert tee.
"Even if you weren't sick I'd still be all over you silly. I've waited months to trail behind you like a lost puppy. Months!"
"God I'm so glad you're who I've got to come home too. Once I don't feel on the verge of constantly passing out, you're getting this treatment times a billion." Your sweet boy ended his declaration with a vicious cough.
He'd pushed himself so hard this last handleful if months, to get his film finished and promoted and get the hell home. It was no wonder he caught a little something at the tail end of his never ending adventure.
You saw Jacob off to bed, tucking yourself in at his side and insisting he save stories of his time away for the morning.
///
The next day you snuck to the kitchen to cook up a big breakfast, letting him sleep away the sick and relishing in the simple fact that he was home at long last.
When Jacob finally padded into the main living space he tried insisting he felt much better, beginning a speech about taking you on a date.
"Absolutely not." You waved off the offer and sat the tall guy down. Neither of you were going anywhere until the red left his eyes and the sniffles stopped entirely. You ordered takeaway and kept Jacob on a steady cup of hot hot tea.
After a day of lounging, he seemed almost back to normal. Though you were hesitant to offer, you said "If you're still this lively by tomorrow night, I'll go out with you."
"Swear?" Jacob rose a brow, grinning in anticipation. You held out a pinkie as if to promise. You weren't long up, cozy in bed with your beloved boy, another early night.
And then... you woke up coughing. Awe fuck.
You tried to play it off. Like a passing tickle in your throat. But soon you were sat up sniveling away, much to your dismay. All your racket woke up the man at your side. And he registered your condition right off.
Jacob let out a low chuckle of surprise, a smile growing wider as he sat up to reach out to you.
"Jacob Elordi are you excited that I'm sick?"
"Of course not." He responded, planting a firm kiss to your head. "But I am looking forward to taking as much care of you as you've taken care of me the past two days."
You cooed and cuddled closer to his side, feeling weaker now that the sickness was unavoidably addressed.
"Don't you dare move. It's my turn now, my love." Jacob smiled, locking those beautiful dark eyes on yours before getting up to follow in your footsteps. Cooking and cleaning and laying out your clothes so you didn't have to lift a finger.
You were bummed to miss another night out. But you were so damn glad Jacob didn't let a little sickness ruin the time the pair of you had been waiting to spend connecting again after so long.
───※ ·❆· ※───
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Hardy Days
January is a month that takes some time to break into like brand new shoes. It always feels longer than it is. It has been a while since I’ve been online properly though for the best reasons. My days have been full. My desk succumbs to entropy just as soon as I’ve tidied it up, my planner is abundant with marks, overflowing with tasks in constant flux. But that just means my hours are well consumed. My days feel very lived in and I’m endlessly thankful for that.
It hasn’t been all work though! I managed to read 4 books so far this month, two of which I would like to mention here. The first book I read is Before We Say Goodbye, which is the fourth book in the Before the Coffee Gets Cold Series by Toshikazu Kawaguchi. I think the fourth one is my favorite so far, if not a close second to the first book. This one made me cry so hard it felt like a cardio exercise haha. The fifth book hasn’t been translated yet and I’m too impatient so I went ahead and started it in Japanese. I was just telling a pal how much comfier it is in the original language. I think I will reread the previous books in Japanese as well once I can get ahold of it from Kinokuniya. I’m so excited!
Another book I finished recently is Voices of the Dead by Ambrose Parry. It’s a historical fiction medical/crime novel set in Victorian Edinburgh. It also has hints of angsty romance between the two main characters, and if you know me at all, you know angst is my fuel, my reason for being lmao. But on top of the already very attractive premise, I must say the pervasive question of “am I what I come from or am I what I can become” throughout all the books is such a robust subject that I can never get enough of. I really enjoyed it! Ah, but now I’ve got to wait for the next book (if there is one). I’m pretty hopeful because the ending was set up for a continuation for sure, but you never know. Also, can I just complain about something extremely petty? Why is the fourth book’s spine different from the rest of the series? It’s from the same publisher, the same font is used. But why is the symbol not the same size as the other volumes’ symbols? WHY. Why would they make it not line up properly like that? I’m losing my mind!!
Now, I’m not one for redecorating just because it’s a new year, but I did change up my vinyl corner by switching out the old art with two posters in matching red—one from a Mitski concert way back in 2017, and one poster of Billie Marten’s 2023 album. Two very different eras of my life coming together. Quite poetic now that I think about it.
While on the subject of music, I’ve had Marika Hackman’s new album “Big Sigh” on repeat since it came out. Oh my god it’s so so good. I remember thinking when I first heard it, god, this is like having my guts pulled out of me. The lyrics are so raw I felt like my chest was going to cave in. Even the music conveys such angst and self-sabotage. The one song that struck me the most is the penultimate song called “Please Don’t Be So Kind.” That one really spoke to me. I love it so much I figured out the guitar chords by ear because I badly wanted to play it. (It’s just three chords in slightly different arrangements throughout the song: C/G-D/A-Em7/B. Half-step up tuning or more conveniently with capo on the 1st fret). I haven’t stopped thinking about the album and I don’t think I will ever stop doing so. I feel that my life is made richer by having listened to this body of work. Even though it’s rather depressing, I actually relish that about it. I think I’m at an age now where I can clearly see my emotion outside my body. It’s a place I can visit as I please. I can work through my feelings and then when I’ve done my best with it, I can leave it be. I can experience things as deeply as I want to while having the confidence that I won’t lose myself in it. It’s a very freeing sense of clarity.
Also, this is from a while back now but I got the newest volume of the coffee magazine I’m subscribed to and the coffee sampler they sent for the quarter is stellar. It tasted of peach and orange, it was insane. The sampler had enough for only two espresso double shots but it made such an impact I just have to note it down here. The roaster, A Matter of Concrete, is based in Rotterdam. I might have to pop in there to try more of their coffee one of these days. Oh, but this reminds me that my grinders are due for a cleaning. Right, I’ll have to do that sometime tomorrow. And I’m not looking forward to it because I’m always anxious I’ll fuck up the burrs or put the grinders back all wrong. Also, looking at this photo, I have to polish my espresso machine, don’t I? Oops.
What else have I been up to? I’ve recently reconnected with my best friend from my undergraduate days and it has been such a blessing. We didn’t have a fight or anything. We just drifted apart because I moved away for my MA and they went back home for a job offer. But they reached out to let me know they’ll be moving to Europe to start a second degree and a career change!! Which means we will be able to see each other again!! Oh, I’m looking forward to that so much I’m counting the days. I have such fond memories of them I can’t wait to bear hug the hell out of them haha.
I also finally decided to finish a writing project I have left alone to stew in its own unfinished mess for far too long lol. I forced myself to churn as much words as I could, and then the arduous task of negotiating what to keep, what to expand and what to cut came soon after. I’ve since finished it and I’m relieved to have concluded that story. I’m quite satisfied with the arc. It felt like a good study of how I write, what I want from a story and how I can achieve it. Writing is a process of self discovery and I’m always overwhelmed by that feeling when it’s happening in real time. Like you feel minute parts of yourself shifting into new positions, light shed in previously dark corners. It’s overwhelming and terrifying, yet tranquil and natural at the same time. I look forward to whatever I’ll find in the next writing project.
Anyway, I’m off to do a bit of translation work. It has been quite an eventful Friday for me over here, and my weekend is looking like it will be just as busy. How has your January been? I hope you’ve been taking good care of yourself. I leave you with a song by This Is The Kit called “Inside Outside.” It has a groovy bass line that I enjoy playing and straight up just vibing to. I recommend the album it's from if you’re in the market for something new to listen to.
That’s all for now. Until next time!
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hi hi hello hi I think you're my only sio mutual that's active anymore (': I looked up the welcome 2 elsewhere site because I just randomly remembered it earlier and honestly am I the only one who misses that era? like the bright and colorful aesthetic with the super trippy and horror visuals? the arg they put together? the dyed hair? like maaaan don't get me wrong I'm happy about the new era but elsewhere was taken from us too soon </3 maybe I need to make more art of it lol
Hi!! I'm so glad you sent this ask because I love the elsewhere era so much, I could genuinely talk about it for hours. So here, have this extremely long essay about my experience.
I discovered set it off in early 2021, so the elsewhere era was the first full album cycle I experienced. And my god it was perfect! I was on holiday when the website went up along with the teaser for skeleton, and I remember so clearly trying to figure out all the puzzles before retreating alone back to our hotel room to figure out minesweeper. The feeling of excitement as the discord was going crazy trying to figure everything out was unmatched!
And then skeleton came out, and I was genuinely obsessed. I had just moved into an awful shared house for my second year at uni, so I drowned all my sorrows by putting the song on repeat, drawing the band almost constantly and of course, making the lyric video that would start my channel! The hype was so massive, the dyed hair was iconic, I genuinely lived and breathed the multicoloured aesthetic. I bought every single merch thing I could (my room decor and t shirts still reflect this.) I got a switch that year, and immediately named my island elsewhere.
Every time the website changed, the excitement was so palpable that I dropped everything I was doing when it happened. Of course I had projector and who's in control on loop when they came out, and while I didn't like them as much as skeleton, they built so much hype for the album it was unreal. I even attended an online concert a couple months before the album came out, and it took place so late at night that I went to sleep at 5am while having to get up at 8. I was that committed.
And remember the teasers they posted to instagram and twitter? The ones they posted at 5pm every wednesday and sunday, where unscrambling the code revealed the next song title, the ones I based my elsewhere lyric videos off? I actually set an alarm on my phone so I could catch these as soon as they appeared, I was that desperate to know the next title! And of course the discord went crazy each time, the energy was unmatched. And when the album actually came out, oh my god. It was on loop for over 6 months. I thought taste of the good life was a gift from god, the amount of times I listened to it.
The hype continued throughout 2022, as demos kept coming out through the fanclub (which I paid full money for, getting one of my favourite ever hoodies in the process) and each demo seemed to be better than the next. I still have no idea how the truth about lying was cut from elsewhere and playing with bad luck stayed.
Also, I was so excited for my first ever sio concert that november. And the day 100% lived up to the expectations! I gave the boys some stickers in vip which they loved, and even got a hug from zach after explaining an obscure talk it off reference on one of his stickers. I made some great friends in line, even though I got seated tickets so I had to be separated from them, but I did still get great seats. And the concert itself!! I'm so glad I can say I've seen third wheel live, even if it was in the medley. And I still remember the pure joy I felt when I waved at cody and he waved back at me during uncontainable.
By the start of 2023 and all the "scandals" and stuff started happening, along with their slow retreat off of all social media, I could tell the era was gradually ending and I was really sad. It fully sunk in when they stopped dying their hair, and I was devastated, I almost forgot what they looked like with natural hair. Although I will say I probably got more closure on the era than you guys in america, because I actually made it to one of the end of elsewhere shows here in the uk.
I have to say, that was probably the best night of my life. I paid full price for the vip this time, so I got to actually hang around and talk to them before the show. I also got standing tickets, and managed to get barrier, which was so close to the stage I could've reached out and touched cody countless times. It was wild, and I enjoyed every second. Of course, 4 days later punching bag released, marking the proper end of elsewhere. (And they haven't toured the uk since.)
I miss this era so goddamn much. I have so much nostalgia for it, even though its barely been a year since it ended, and I really wish the current era's branding was as strong. I always felt so close to the band during elsewhere, with all the talk it off episodes and them noticing me on social media. The sense of community was strong, and I miss it a lot now they've stopped posting anything. Idk, I might be biased because it was my first time experiencing a full era.
Anyway, if you actually read all that, thanks! I really needed a good reminisce. And yes, you should make more art of elsewhere! The visuals were unmatched, especially in the music videos 💜💜
#oh my god i actually spent an hour typing all of this out#can you believe elsewhere is my favourite sio album? shocking right#i definitely shouldnt have written all that#i just felt like i needed to get it off my chest#lol its 3am now i should probably go to bed#someone asks me about elsewhere and i just black out#im both ill and sleep deprived what a combination#set it off#set it off band#sio#pow asks#elsewhere
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First Thailand trip. First out of the country trip with just friends. First Twice concert.
It was surreal. It was epic.
As of this writing, both weekends with Twice are already over and I'm struggling to express my feelings.
There has to be a name to capture this jumble of feelings, right? Cause it has been swirling around me virtually every minute of the last few days as I reflect on my experiences with Twice and gently re-enter the real world.
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THE DECISION.
When I first discovered more about Twice, it was a pandemic. "More" since I previously knew them through my great friend Pat, but I never had the opportunity to listen to their music.
It was during More and More when I first saw Sana, and gosh, I know I'm going to love her for the rest of my life. It was as if I had been transported elsewhere, and I craved more of her. I was smitten by her eyes, her tone, and everything about her, especially her orange hair.
I knew I'd do everything to see and hear her and Twice sing live, and I finally got what I'd been hoping for the last four years when I watched the girl herself perform at Impact Arena.
The Ready to Be tour was announced in February, and I was both excited and nervous about whether the Philippines would be included, as they had only announced Part I at the time. Until they announced a few months later that our country will be included in the trip!
I think it was around that time that Hannah introduced me to Rina, and we all agreed that we’d buy VIP tickets. But of course, not everything will go according to plan.
We were only able to obtain Lower Box tickets for both days in the Philippines, which was devastating because we were unable to secure our preferred seats. All the plans for banners and signs that we would show Twice went down the drain. It was then that they decided to plan a trip to Thailand to see Twice. I'm not going to lie; at first, I was skeptical. I was unsure whether my savings were enough, and I am anxious about staying days out of the country with just friends (I’m blaming my introvertness!).
A couple of thoughts came to my mind:
What will happen during our trip? Will I fit in well? Will I be awkward? What if I mess up? What if they don't like me?
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But there's just this excitement in my heart that urges me to try new things. I want to try to go to a place where my soul can grow, a place where I can get out of my comfort zone and explore different aspects of myself.
So I said, “Fuck it, I want to see Sana up close!”
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The Thailand Ready to Be in Thailand concert ticket sales arrived, and we were worried because this would be our last chance to see them in the VIP section. In comparison to the Philippines, the Thailand website was smooth and simple to use! Just a quick note to self, use a card that is accepted in Bangkok.
A couple of hiccups later, we finally got the tickets!
Relief and delight washed over me as the reality of going to another country to see Sana dawned on me.
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I felt slightly melancholy. Another wave of anxiety washed over me as I methodically planned the next trip, thinking that my sister is not going to be with me.
But I know what I want and what makes me happy. And I know that if I prioritize staying in my comfort zone, I would regret not going for the rest of my life. And I don’t want to do that to me.
Deep down inside I know that I am excited, I’m just scared that I will go there, and my head will be full of “Oh God, when is this going to be over?”
Fortunately for me, the friends I went with are the best (I'll dedicate a special section to them later).
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THAILAND & FRIENDS.
We booked tickets with Cebu Pacific Airlines, which added to our worries because the airline is notorious for canceling flights, and we won't know what to do if that happens.
And I believe that as soon as we got to the airport, all the luck showered on us, because there were no problems after that.
There were no flight delays. We had no problems with our luggage. Everyone went through immigration without incident. Everything was fine.
I was so happy.
Two extroverts and two introverts were, in my opinion, the ideal trip companions.
There was enough humor to make it extremely enjoyable and I wasn't compelled to interact all of the time because everyone respected everyone's peace and pace.
The first two people on this list were folks with whom I had never previously interacted. They are the people I have been anxious to meet, and I'm relieved that my concerns were unfounded.
Lee would fill in the gaps whenever there was dead air, loves to joke around, and loves to take great photographs, taking his fill on adventures as it was his first time out of the country. It was fun since he was there, and I had a fantastic time laughing at his shenanigans.
Rina was also an extrovert (though she insists she isn't), and I swear every time we turned around, she had made new friends (particularly at the concert hall). We instantly discussed Blackpink and Twice because we both adore both groups. Because of her it was never a dull moment. My co-water warrior, I appreciate all of our conversations and how you always include me in them. I’m glad that I got to know you!
Finally, Hannah, the mother of the group, HAHAHAHA! She truly took care of us all, from the time we booked our concert tickets, booked our airline tickets to our Airbnb accommodations and navigated our way around Thailand. She was the only one I knew from the group; but we had only gotten out twice before going to Thailand. Without her, I doubt we would have had a pleasant experience. I really enjoyed how she bargained with the locals ("There they said it's only 10 baht" iykyk) HAHAHA! We received discounts, but she purchased bracelets that were at least 20 times more expensive. Budol is real. Thank you for your assurance that everything will be well, and you are right that I did enjoy the trip! Thank you for inviting me to join you on this trip! This is an experience I will remember for the rest of my life.
Thailand has amazing food, and I have great friends, what more could you ask for, right?
I was able to have this out-of-body and amazing experience of witnessing Twice up close because of you three! And of course, visit one of the most tourist-friendly countries, Thailand. I will surely return!
I’m glad that I trusted my instincts, and that is to trust you! So many great things happened, and I would have completely missed out on all of these things had I not gone. And I’m not so sure that these things would have happened in the same way had I not been with you three.
We went anywhere we wanted. We did anything we wanted. We ate anything we wanted.
Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
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TWICE.
September seemed a lifetime away when we got our tickets, but it finally arrived, and on September 24th, Hannah, Rina, and I made our way to Impact Arena with our concert gear (aka our lightsticks and our hearts full of love for Twice).
We arrived early because we were used to huge queues and expected delays and mishaps.
But surprise, surprise! We finished everything in 15 minutes. From claiming the physical tickets, buying official merch to buying our lunch for the day!
We even had time to line up for the photo wall.
And of course, we would not miss the chance to kneel before Sana! :D
We lined up the queue, and since my number was 1111, we were praying hard that we could get a good spot. So, by the time we got to the gate, we were running like hell to our chosen section, and we managed to reach at least four rows after the barricade!
Remember the screenshot earlier? About our desired spot? We managed to get there. Yay!
At this point, I was getting fatigued but yet enthusiastic because the soundcheck was about to begin. My feet and legs were aching, but my heart was overjoyed.
A couple of folks were telling Rina about their Twice concert experiences. Others had the opportunity to see the girls from years ago, while some had the opportunity to attend the day before us. And as I listened to their stories, I became more excited about what was to follow. Along with the hope that Sana is feeling better, and that we get to interact with them even if it’s just a few seconds.
Soundcheck began about a minute or two after 3 p.m. And my heart was racing so hard! They're finally in front of me after a long time of anticipating seeing Twice!
At the same time, the entire VIP area went berserk, and they began to push their way to the front to have a closer look of the girls and to engage with them.
I tried to take a quick shot of them, but I was immediately stopped by the guards, and when I witnessed individuals being escorted out of the stadium, I became terrified and decided not to risk being tossed out. It was a mess, really. Someone even lost their footwear!
(credits to Rina for this screenshot):
As soon as I saw a glimpse of Sana’s beautiful wavy hair and pretty face, I forgot the pain in my legs! She really is beautiful!
But since I spent a scary amount of time watching her videos, I noticed that something's wrong. She’s not like her usual self, and mostly stayed at the left side of the stage (we were standing at the right side). Even her eyes are not glowing like before. We started to get worried because we know that their schedule is no joke, and she might be really tired at this point.
If you hadn't already guessed, yes, I am a Sana-biased fan.
So seeing that my bias was not in the mood is worrying, but I can see that she did her best, and still interacted with fans.
The soundcheck lasted around ten minutes and consisted of only three songs; by the time it was over, we were already closer to the stage due to the pushing. So, while it was frightening, it was also a blessing in disguise.
Maybe you’re wondering about my first impression with Twice members, I’ll get into that later.
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THE CONCERT.
The VCR changed without warning. Ignoring the discomfort in my legs, my excitement shot through the roof as I realized the moment I had been waiting for had arrived. The time has come for me to see and hear Twice live for the first time with their full costume.
“I’m about to hear the group that I have enjoyed listening to for years.” I thought to myself.
I loved the way they were unveiled to the stage, and then the screen showed them all lined up, looking all serious and ready to rock my world. The feeling of adrenaline and happiness rushed within me as they walked and line up for their Set Me Free performance.
Instantly felt myself sweating from the time they finished their first song, maybe because: 1. The spotlights were really intense, and 2. TWICE PERFORMANCE WERE SO HOT!
The screen showed a very lovely Kim Dahyun starting the routine, and my mind flashed back to the first time I saw her. She was truly wacky and one-of-a-kind, and I never imagined (though I really hoped) that I would watch them one day, let alone in another country.
I remembered the girl beside me trying to help me capture moments, since my hands were already hurting due to fatigue, and the people in front of me were really tall. I know that this will never reach her, but I just want to say thank you.
I Can’t Stop Me was next. I’m still in a daze, but I couldn’t help but sing along with Nayeon’s “Allami ullyeodae ring, ring-a-linga” and as soon as the pre-chorus started with Sana’s heavenly vocals singing, “Maeumsogeuroneun da algo itjanha, gyeolgugeneun seoneul neomge doel georaneun geol”, I lost it. As much as I hate to admit it, I really loved Sana’s moves during that part, and I spent an insane amount of time watching fancams and dance videos of ICSM because of that part.
And just like that, they finished their first two songs and started with their first ment. The crowd was screaming as soon as they introduced themselves.
I was just standing there, thinking to myself, “Woah, they are real people. I just saw them perform, and I’m not dreaming at all.”
The lights changed and Jeongyeon’s voice echoed throughout the whole arena, as she sang the first lines of “Go Hard”. And I know that it will be hot, and of course the red lights are not helping at all. They were in perfect sync, and you can’t help but think about how much time they spent perfecting the choreography.
This was followed by More and More, which showed a dreamy image of them sitting on ladders while performing choreography. They walked towards the extended stage halfway through the song, and seeing how hard they danced to it, followed by Moonlight Sunrise and Brave felt surreal.
It was as though they were completely different individuals on stage than their regular effervescent personas.
And then finally, Dahyun, Tzuyu, Sana, Momo and Mina exited the stage, while Chaeyoung, Jihyo, Jeongyeon and Nayeon stayed to talk to us a bit more as the first group of solo performers prepared for their stages.
I won’t go into detail about all of the performances, but I will tell you what I felt the first time that I saw the girls.
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FIRST IMPRESSIONS.
Im Nayeon.
I must admit that I understand where her confidence comes from when she confidently declares that she is the most beautiful, because she truly is pretty. And the way she hits those high notes, is like a blessing to our ears. Unfortunately I was unable to take as many videos and photos of her because I was distracted by my bias the whole time.
Yoo Jeongyeon.
I WAS STUNNED. She has such a little and lovely face that all you can do is stare at her. But her voice, oh God, her voice is so powerful that I couldn't help but regret not joining the fandom earlier and missing the opportunity to hear her perform One in a Million live.
Hirai Momo.
Dance God with barbie-like features. She was always smiling and waving at our side of the stage, and I saw how cute she interacts with fans. Momo has a captivating stage presence and appears to be in her own universe while she performs. This is due to her intense focus on her performance in her aim to provide her audience with the best spectacle possible.
Park Jihyo.
She is a force to be reckoned with. Her high precision dance maneuvers electrify the audience, and she sings with the passion of a firebird. Her high notes are like pearls, each one more valuable than the last . She is unquestionably the best leader Twice can ask for.
Myoi Mina
On stage, she is a queen, her presence imposing and her aura irresistible. When she exits the stage, she returns to her modest self, kind and unassuming to the point where she was surprised that people screamed her name so much because of her sensual performance. Her facial features are delicate and ethereal that you can look at her all day long.
Kim Dahyun.
Her performance of "Try" is a work of art, a beautiful blend of power and emotion. Her smile is like a ray of sunshine, filling the room with warmth. Above all, she embodies quirkiness, with her half-moon eyes that twinkle like stars in the night sky. They crinkle at the corners as she grins, like crescent moons reflecting her warmth, kindness, and playful spirit..
Son Chaeyoung
She walks confidently onto the stage, her dimples flashing like two crescent moons, adding touch to the whimsy of her beauty. Her vocals are sometimes overlooked, yet she has a distinct and expressive voice that complements her song "My Guitar" well. She reminds me of a chameleon, always altering her style and look while being true to herself. Her raps were like fire, igniting the passion of her fans.
Chou Tzuyu
When she threw water at us, it felt like we were blessed. It is true that when you look at her beauty, you couldn’t help but stare and wonder if the one in front of you is a real person or a goddess. A celestial beauty descended from the heavens. Her beauty combined with humility and kindness is a true gift to the world. We really need more Tzuyus in the world. She may be the youngest, but her exquisite movements can make anyone melt.
──────────────────── ♡❤♡ ────────────────────
MINATOZAKI SANA.
I always get asked, “Who is your ultimate bias?”
And I always dodge the question, because how can I even choose?
But after seeing her perform for three days, I now have an answer. Minatozaki Sana.
Vocals. Visual. Dancer. Writer. Performer. Minatozaki Sana is all of these things. She is also the love of my life. There was no way I could begin or end my day without listening to her voice or raving over her beauty. As the three of us (Rina, Hannah, and I) discussed, we would rather feel down than see her sad. She is the embodiment of joy. If I could, I would formally thank her for her excellent timing, since every time I felt low and couldn't take another step, she would always post something or send a note in Bubble. I'm sure many people don't realize it, but Sana is a lifeboat for me on a rainy day at the ocean.
What was it like seeing her perform live?
It was like stepping into a fairy tale.
She was everything that I imagined and more. Her beauty is breathtaking, her talent is undeniable, and her aura is enticing. It felt like I was in the presence of royalty, and I knew it was a moment I would remember for the rest of my life.
The experience of filming "New Rules" was surreal. I was so used to watching her on the screen of my phone that when I did it, I couldn't believe I had the opportunity to film her personally.
──────────────────── ♡❤♡ ────────────────────
ENDING.
It was all over in a blink of an eye, and I wish we had more time to watch the girls perform, but I guess that’s just an excuse to book another VIP experience in the future, right? Unless I hit the jackpot and sponsor one of their albums in the future and get the chance to meet them up close and personal before then...
If you see this blog, it means that you also know how much I love Sana and Dahyun and their dynamic. And you also probably know how they saw our banner, and Dahyun ‘tried’ to piggyback Sana.
It was just one other thing that happened before the concert ended, but I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of talking about this moment. I know that my friends and family are sick of it already, but when you’ve supported an artist with your whole heart, no feeling will ever come close to the one created when you see them live and when they notice you.
No words will ever do this experience justice.
The moment that I saw Dahyun notice the banner that Hannah was holding, my heart pounded like crazy, since it was apparent that she looked around to check if Sana was near. Then, a couple of seconds later, we saw her pull Sana closer to our side, and then they did as we asked! She leaned down, and Sana tried to piggyback on her.
It was only a split second because Sana was wearing a skirt, and Dahyun, being the greenest flag of all, stopped immediately and held on to Sana’s skirt to protect her.
What's funny was due to us gaypanicking, Hannah and I were unable to get a good shot about what we experienced.
After that moment, Dahyun even did a thumbs up sign, as if asking if we were satisfied with what they did. Truly the queen of fanservice.
Everything about the experience was special. It’s moments like this that help you forget all about the things that are bothering you, the things that are weighing you down, and even if it only lasts for an hour, or even just a second, I felt happiness.
It was short and sweet but definitely a moment that I’ll remember forever and one I feel very lucky to have had.
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I Missed You, George!
A Joji fanfic because there’s not a lot on tumblr, it makes me sad.
Here I am celebrating the release of Joji’s New Album.
Themes: Smut ; LDR ; Break Up ; 18+
—————-
This is how our relationship ended.
“This is not working anymore. I’m sorry, Y/N. This is too much for me.” He said, hurtful yet filled with sorrow.
His thumb gently touching my arm as if to comfort me with this news. Shocked is one way to put it. I tried my best not to let my jaw hang along with the tears that started to stream down my face. It was so sudden. I was so confused. We were doing so good but ever since i shared my thoughts about wanting to go back to my home country, he seemed so bothered by it although he did try to hide it. But it was just a thought, I definitely would push that thought aside if he asked me to.
“Why are you being like this? Did I do something wrong? Am I not enough?”
“Of course, you’re enough! But I just can’t right now.”
Feeling my eyes burn from this, I pushed his hand away from my arms lightly and immediately wiped my tears away.
“Y-yeah, no, you wouldn’t even tell me why? I-I don’t deserve this, George.” I stood up and left his apartment.
Few messages were sent asking how I was, after answering coldly a few times, the messages eventually stopped coming in.
I figured, of course, he’s this world renowned musician, he had probably moved on. Besides, with his status, he could easily get whoever he wanted. I don’t even know how he liked me in the beginning. Im not the model type. I look like an average girl. I am an average girl. I am a nobody. Why did he make me feel this way only to break up with me without an explanation? My body is far from perfect but the way he touched and kissed and looked at me felt like I was the most beautiful thing in the world. But I guess, I was just a chapter in his life, and he was ready to turn to the next page.
————— one year and three months pass
“—the Japanese-Australian singer, Joji is finally coming here this coming Monday for his much awaited concert! Oh, I’m so excited for this!” says the local celebrity news caster on the tv.
I gasped. Joji knew where my home country was. We’ve talked so much about my culture and my family and he knew how much I missed them when I was in the US. The concert’s in a few days and although I have no intention of watching, I did think about how it would be like to be with him again. To touch him and kiss him. To cuddle and smell him again.
I miss you so much, George. You have no idea.
I miss you so much that it tears me up every time I would think about the pretty moments we shared. I remember everything. Even sitting on your lap and helping you shave, taking hot baths together when you’d come home to me tired from making music. Making you try a new recipe i made and you loving every dish because you’re such a foodie. Coming home and immediately laying almost on top of me in the couch, resting your chin on my chest, looking up at me with a pout and me kissing the pout away. I just wanna lay right by your side again, Joj.
*ding*
I checked my phone as I escape my thoughts of Joji. And— wait! Oh my God! No way!
Hey, Y/N! I heard you’re in (Y/country), come say hi to an old friend. I miss you.
A whole 15 minutes go by just thinking of a cool way to answer this. Of course, there’s nothing else I want in this world but to see you again, Joji but I must be cool and not look like a complete idiot puppy.
We set up the specifics and decided to meet at the hotel he’s staying at for dinner. The dinner will be served inside his hotel room to avoid getting seen by other people. He can’t have bad press or rumors now, he says. It made me sad but I know how fragile his mental health gets and I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. I had no right to.
—————
The pressure of choosing what to wear and how to present myself after over a year of not seeing Joji is intense. I put on a comfortable A-line dress, Sandals and some light make up. I don’t wanna seem like I put too much effort. Besides, things are over between us, right?
—————
1702. I knocked at his hotel room door and it didn’t take long until he opened the door. As the door opens, I put on a smile to maybe mask the nervousness I feel inside.
“Hey, Y/N!” He immediately envelops me in a tight hug, pulling me up slightly. I missed your scent, my georgie.
“I missed you too, Y/N. Even if you don’t want to say it.” Joji says smiling at me. He looked happy. It broke me a little seeing his smile because it’s probably not because of me.
“I missed you, Georgie!” I said passing him the bottle of wine I brought with me.
“Oooh, wine! You’re a changed woman now, Y/N. This used to be a bottle of tequila and cheap weed.”
I laughed as I sat in his bed.
“I love your new music, Joj. I’m so proud of you.” I stood up connecting my phone to the Bose Bluetooth Speaker in front of the TV.
I played “Ew” off of his new album.
“This is my personal favorite.” I look back at him, he nods as he sits on the end of the bed. He looked different, his face more serious.
Ooh, teach me to love just to let me go..
I sit beside Joji.
“How have you been, y/n?”
I froze a little seeing how serious he was and just like how I deal with stressful circumstances, I decide to act playful.
“Miserable without you!” I laughed slightly punching his shoulder. Well, this is awkward. But Joji, It was the truth.
While looking at the floor, a smile creeps up his face and says “Same.” He looks at me straight in the eyes, i avoided his stare and looked at the floor. My smile almost disappearing.
“Wanna order some food?” I said,
“What I want is to kiss you, Y/N.”
I feel my cheeks start to burn as I look back at him. Are we in a movie? I’m pretty sure this happens only in movies. Yes, George. I want to kiss you. I want more than just to kiss you.
I met his eyes and seeing his face look so tired and sad and lonely all of a sudden, I leaned in and kissed him.
Joji’s kisses were always deep, there’s a pull to them. Hard but gentle. Sensual and sweet. The kiss was slow. I held his face and his hands were on my waists.
He starts to go down on my neck. He felt so hungry. And like before, he didn’t care about what people would say if he marks his territory. His hands slipped inside my dress and he’s groping my thighs. My hands entangled in his hair. He gives a low groan as he pulls me to sit on his lap.
Oh, how I’ve missed this.
As Im Starting to feel myself well up and I feel George’s hands start to pull on my dress, I let him take it off of me. This leaves me in my bra and underwear. I stood up, and took his hands to motion him to stand too. I undressed him. And I kiss him again as I trace all of my favorite tattoos on him. I push him lightly to sit on the bed and knelt down in front of him.
I felt the hunger. This is really happening.
I stroked his hard member slowly and looked up at him. He’s looking down at me with those sleepy looking eyes. He grabbed my hair and pushed me on his throbbing cock.
I sucked on his cock like it was the end of the world. Between his moans and groans, i feel his hips move up and his hand on my head push me down until I could no longer handle his length. Seeing his legs twitch a little, I stopped.
I stood up. His eyes following my every movement. I looked at him too, just wanting him inside me. I took off my bra, took his hands and made him pull my panties down. I straddled him, kissing his lips and neck. Gently biting his ear when he’s busy with my breasts, feeling the tip of his hard cock poking my belly button.
“I’m so fucking wet, Joji.”
“Mmhm..” He says.
“I want you inside me, now.”
He stops licking and kissing my breasts and flips me on the bed until he’s on top of me.
“I missed you so much, baby.” he says as he trails kisses on my body. I let out a moan as his tongue reaches my clit. I grabbed the sheet with my left hand and put my hand on his head while he eats me.
“Oh fuck, you’re so good, baby!” I let out as i am running out of breath. My hips rotate along with his tongue on my clit. Pushing his head down as if there were still space to fill. He fingers me as he continuously ears me. He growls at my wetness. I moan louder and breathe heavier. I start to reach my climax, shaking as he licks me. He suddenly stops and that made me open my eyes and say “What the fuck, bitch?” He laughs. I notice his mouth and nose glistening from my wetness. He bends down and kisses me.
I break the kiss to say, “Please, Joji. Put your dick in me!” I plead.
“Yes, your majesty.” He chuckles then positions his dick at my entrance. He looks at me and kisses me as he enters me. I moan in between the kisses as he plays with my nipples with his fingers. He growls as his pace quickens.
“Yes, baby!” I let out. He grabs my arm and makes me turn around and be on my knees. My upper body and face on the sheets. Moans and groans fill the air. His grip on my hips are hard, the type where it might leave a bruise after but it’s fine because his dick was divine. It was worth the wait.
He grabs both of my arms as he fucks me senseless. I am now kneeling but my body is against his. I hear his growls. “Fuck, Y/N.” His pace starts to get sloppy. I moan out of pure satisfaction. “I’m so close, baby.” And As i said that, i started shaking. My hand on his nape as he palms by breast. As I moan, he starts groaning and with this I felt his hot cum shoot up inside me and start to drip down my inner thighs.
I turn around, we’re both out of breath. I give him a peck on the lips. His hands on my butt.
“I still love you, Joji.” I said breathlessly.
He didn’t reply. He looked at me deeply, but sad. I figured, Maybe he really doesn’t want me the way I wanted him. Saddened, I got up and cleaned myself in the bathroom. I came out and I see him laying under the sheets and just before I grab the first item of clothing, he says,
“Come here, Y/N.”
I went to the bed and hugged him. I rested my head on his chest.
“I’m sorry I broke up with you. Its just that when you said you wanted to go back home, I didn’t want to be the reason for you to stay. I know how much it killed you being away from your family.”
So that was the reason.
“But you were my family too, Joji. Still is. And maybe, you’re right. I would’ve stayed there with you but at least I wouldn’t suffer losing you.” I look at Joji with tears in my eyes.
“I love you, Y/N.”
“I love you more, George.”
“Can we try again?
I laugh at his words. He wipes my tears away. I kiss him again.
“As long as you give me tickets to your show tomorrow.” I giggle.
“Fuck you!” He says in between his laughter as he gets up and lights a cigarette.
——————
Hope you like my first fic!
Ps. I used “Ew” for the storyline, alright?
Feel free to let me know about your thoughts.
❤️
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Dreams {E.M.}
✰ 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: none
✰ 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Eddie Munson x fem!reader
✰ 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1.5k
✰ 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: You have a dream about meeting the lead singer of your favorite band, too bad not all dreams come true right?
✰ 𝐀/𝐍: Based on a dream I had about Gaten Matarazzo. It didn't come true so I'm writing a fic about it.
You and your best friend, Kate, were walking outside of the venue after a Corroded Coffin concert on the way to her car when a tall figure caught you eye.
"Oh my gods look! It's Eddie Munson!" You whisper-yelled at your friend.
"Where?" She asked, looking in the complete opposite direction as you.
You physically moved Kate's head in the direction you were looking. "Right there!"
Kate nodded excitedly and pulled out her Corroded Coffin mix. "You think I can get him to sign my cassette of his band?"
"I don't see why not," You shrugged. "You think I can get his phone number?"
Kate snorted at the thought. "If you can get his phone number I will give you two thousand dollars."
"Deal!" You agreed.
"Hey Eddie!" You two squealed excitedly at the obviously exhausted man.
He smiled at the two of you and stood a little straighter. "Hello ladies, what can I do for you?"
"Can you sign my tape?" Kate asked, shoving the cassette in Eddie's face.
He chuckled and grabbed the tape, signing it real quick. "Sure thing Red. And I suppose you want something too yeah?" He asked as he handed the tape back to Kate.
You gathered up all your courage and handed him a sharpie. "Can I have your number?" You asked as you offered him your arm.
He took your arm and sighed dramatically. "Who am I to deny a pretty girl like you my number?" He asked rhetorically before writing down those 10 glorious numbers.
"I'm-" You tried introducing.
He held a ringed finger up to interrupt. "(Y/N), I know."
"You do?" You asked, fanning your arm so the sharpie didn't smudge.
He smiled slightly before stuffing his hands in the front pockets of his jeans. "I mean, yeah. This is a dream after all. I know you and your little friends are all obsessed with me," He teased.
"I- What?"
He shrugged and leaned against the wall casually. "I also know you're late for your college classes."
You started to panic a little. That was not at all what you were expecting Eddie Munson, of all people, to say to you. "I'm what?"
"Wake up!" He said forcefully.
"Wake up! We're late!" Kate screeched in your ear.
You woke groggily turned over and Kate, sweet and caring Kate, was in your face causing you to scream and fully wake up. "What the heck was that?"
"What was what?" She asked. "The fact that we almost kissed just now?"
You shook your head and started picking at your nails. "Well I had a dream and-"
Kate threw a random outfit at you and pulled your blankets off. "We all have dreams. Hurry up."
"On it!" You said, getting ready at quickly as you could.
Once you were in the car Kate immediately started on your weird behavior from that morning. Which really wasn't all that weird considering that you got woken up.
"So... what was the ever important dream that almost caused us to leave late?" She asked, dramatically wiggling her fingers over the steering wheel as if to summon magic or something.
"We met Eddie Munson," You stated plainly. "Not much else to say."
"Really?" She asked. "Huh."
"Yeah! And I got his number and he called me pretty." You said happily, going into the glove compartment for napkins.
Kate looked intrigued and bobbed her head a little to the faint track on the radio before responding. "Okay fine, I can understand it now."
"Thanks."
"Would now be a good time to tell you I got us Corroded Coffin tickets?" She asked, bracing herself for a scream.
You started to flap your hands out of excitement and could hardly get your next words out. "What? When? Why?"
Kate smiled at your reaction and nodded. "I got us tickets to see Corroded Coffin. I got them last month from that one radio show that does all those fundraisers and giveaways. I got them because you're my best friend and they're playing on your birthday. I'm just lucky I was caller number 10," She chuckled.
You stopped almost hyperventilating for a second and "Wait... That was you? I was cursing lucky Caller Number 10 for weeks."
Kate sounded a little guilty. "I know. It was hard to not spill."
"Can't wait babes. Thanks for being my best friend." You said, patting her shoulder.
Kate smiled before pulling into the parking lot. "Thanks for being understanding of my secret keeping."
You grabbed your bag from the back before giggling. "You got me tickets for my favorite band it's, quite literally, the least I can do."
. . .
You had spent more time than you'd like to admit on your appearance for that night but it's your birthday, you can do what you want as long as it's legal.
You walked out of your room and Kate immediately went for the compliments. "Ooo! Too bad you're wasting that outfit on me and not a date. Everyone's gonna be jealous that you're on my arm and not theirs," She winked as she put her shoes on.
You waved your hands and shook your head. "Oh shut up Kate. You look good yourself. You look like Deborah Kerr but punk," You nodded sincerely.
Kate twirled her hair a little before looking up at you. "Do you think that hot drummer might notice me?"
"Maybe."
"Good," She nodded. "Come on, I'll stop at Macca's if you put your shoes on in the-"
You picked up your heels and sprinted to Kate's car. "Hurry up slow poke!"
"-Car."
. . .
You and Kate were giggling to each other, stumbling slightly because you could barely stand in your heels anymore.
"That was a good show!" You said louder than you meant to.
"Right? Who's the bestest friend in the whole world for buying those tickets?" Kate asked, nudging you a little which caused you to stumble.
You regained your composure and smiled. "You are."
"And- Oh my gods (Y/N) look!" Kate whisper-yelled at you, pointing at something.
You excitedly hit Kate on the arm. "Oh my lord it's Eddie Munson!"
"You think I can get him to sign my cassette of his band?" She asked, holding up her mix tape.
You shrugged. "I don't see why not. You think I can get his phone number?"
Kate snorted at the prospect. "If you can get his phone number I will give you two thousand dollars."
"Deal!" You agreed.
You and Kate walked up to Eddie, attempting to act like normal people. "Excuse me, uh, are you Eddie Munson?"
"That I am," He nodded.
"Can you sign something for me?" Kate asked, shoving her tape in his face.
Eddie chuckled, quickly signing the tape and handing it back to her. "Sure thing Red. And I suppose you want something too yeah?"
"Can I have your number?" You asked as you handed Eddie a sharpie.
"Who am I to deny a pretty girl like you my number?" He asked, putting the cap in his mouth to open it as he grabbed your arm.
"Thank you so much! I'm (Y/N)." You said politely, staring at Eddie's hand as he wrote on your arm.
He spit the cap out and put it back on your sharpie. "Well (Y/N), hope you call me sometime. Definitely free tomorrow at 3 if you do want to call." He winked, handing you back he permanent marker.
You nodded, somehow keeping your composure. "I'll keep that in mind."
Eddie waved before heading back in to clean up with the rest of the band. "Goodnight ladies, nice meeting you two."
"Night Eddie!" You and Kate said loudly enough for him to hear.
. . .
"Best birthday ever?" Kate asked you in her car. You were half-asleep and out of it since it was after midnight but it was still the best night ever.
You yawned and tapped Kate to make sure she was still listening. "That happened almost exactly like my dream."
"What do you mean?"
"He even called you Red." You said tiredly, rubbing your eyes.
Kate chuckled at that. "I have red hair mate. Everyone calls me Red."
You shrugged before shifting in your seat and leaning on your hand. "Yeah but... it was a weird coincidence."
"Or someone's looking out for you."
You smiled a little at the thought. "Maybe maybe maybe... You owe me two thousand dollars."
"Oh shit. I forgot 'bout that... Where am I going to find two thousand dollars?" Kate asked herself.
. . .
𝓣𝓪𝓰𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽: @gotacuppa @littlemisstrouble @lily-rose-the-ravenclaw @already-unofficial @eddiemunsons-girl @lazydreamer19 @c0rpsecore
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson#eddie#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#eddie x you#eddie x reader#eddie x y/n#joseph x reader#joseph quinn x you#joseph quinn x reader#joseph quinn x y/n#joseph quinn#celebrity au#rockstar!eddie munson#rockstar!eddie#rockstar!au#rockstar au#➴➵➶➴athena writes➶➴➵➶
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I MISSED YOU TOO TUMBLR IS AGAINST ME IT KEEPS EATING MY ASKS THOUGH IT SAID THEY SENT
OKAY SO THE PEOPLE FROM YOUR CORNER OF THE WORLD ONE DIRECTION I love Louis tomlinson so much. I loved him in 1d and loce him now. We had lots of pride stuff at our shows because well do you know the story of Larry stylinson? -Louis probably isn't straight (I mean being in love with your male best friend would suggest) but he has never specifically said what he is also he's so support of his LGBT fans and we love and support him so so much. He's so sweet and his music is great and real and he writes about sad things too!
soooooo I drove 3 hours to Ohio to see him on Thursday after work. I almost got heat exhaustion so hot. They did not have plain water for sale at like 80%of the vendors it was just beer and cocktails (yuck and also NOT HELPFUL IN 90 DEGREE HEAT), got upgraded for free Cuz they had empty seats closer (oh my fucking gosh I almost died of excitement l) IT WAS AMAZING HE WAS GREAT. I then proceeded to drive back and go to work on literally an hour or 2 of sleep and since the pandemic no where's open late anymore so I didn't eat for a day and a half opps.
I went to his Detroit show yesterday and it was lit. He literally said we were fucking unbelieveable a minimum of 4 times and thanked us and called Ohio then michigan(both of which I was at) the best shows his entire tour. I just wanted to hug him like a bazillion times.
#one directioner forever sorry to ramble about my lifelong love for 5 boys from the UK. I just love things veryyyyyyy intensely. Maybe not the normal amount but hey
The staff wouldnt let us get streamers from off the ground :( I know that's probably an odd thing to want what can I say it's a memory. Although I didnt basically sleep for 3 days it was so amazing and completely worth it. I wish I could live it a million times over. Everyone was happy, and Louis was happy:) I am not social, but the atmosphere of concerts and to a different degree professional theater is just something else. We're all there for one thing, and it's so Beautiful. It's one of those times that for me personally my depression anxiety and borderline are far from my mind. I feel euphoric on top of the world and being happy is very nice. Being happy with others; seeing two friends dance or shout words to each other or smile it makes you happy too. Even when I don't know them. So I guess I am social in liking to be around people but just not good at speaking to them.
I also lost my car in a field because they have no signage and in a sea of cars where the fuck did I park. Who knows I wandered for 20 minutes until I finally stumbled upon it. I can't even imagine those people who drink then look for cars like my human you bad decisioned.
My most unfavorite part of concerts is just getting out of the traffic jam afterword. I've learned to get to your car and sit there until there is no line of cars waiting and you're golden. (That usually takes a while bit is worth the headache and wasted gas. )
THAT IS SUPER EXCITING!! I wish you were going next month, lol. I hope you have the most fun!!!! Ahhhh boo tests BUT YAY CONCLUSION!!! That means in a few weeks I can annoy you with all the newsies thoughts xD
I WILL SEND MY FIC IDEA IN A DIFFERENT ASK BECAUSE IM SORRY THIS IS LONG. I kind of apologize for that but you did say tell you all the shenanigans xD
oh my god that sounds incredible and also so chaotic 😭 six year old me had the BIGGEST crush on all of one direction smdmdj i'm so happy you had a great time anon :))
i am going to west endsies next month, but only closing night because i'm away in the usa for about the first half of it anyway ... but i can always buy more tickets ...... 👀
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May 13, 2023
Highkey stressed about my cell bio grade. I mean, I know, grades don’t matter, grades don’t determine my worth, I’m already in my dream program, etc etc etc. It’s jus that the grading scheme is so terribly opaque that I honestly have no idea what to expect from that class when grades are finalized. I’ve learned a ton in cell bio this sem but disliked the way the class was run from the start. Just really unsatisfying, uninspiring. I mean I know that even if I got a B, it wouldn’t matter in a year, ultimately, but right now?? it would feel like I got ji-- oh my god, wait. That word is based on a slur, isn’t it? and spelled with a “g-y-” and not a “j-i-”... I’ve never put that together before! Well. If I got a B after having a literal 99% average across the three exams, I might end up on national news. It’d be my villain origin story during my three-month summer villain arc. I’d decry higher education. I would never donate to this school ever. Should I become famous, I’d sully this school’s name and place all of the credit to my success in my graduate school’s hands.
And speaking of grad school, somehow I’m going to have to cope with the fact that not only will I be unable to do-it-all in grad school, but I’ll probably have to do-even-less. I simply will not be able to join all the clubs and things I’d like. These past two years, I feel like I’ve settled into a good rhythm: performing arts org, service org, culture org. I don’t even know if I’ll have time for just those three categories. I’m excited about the move but certainly nervous about everything else.
Actually, the nerves have really begun setting in over just the last few days. I’ve been feeling as though I’m not really cut out for this? There’s the fear of “well what if I can’t make the cut?” and “what if I decide that it’s not for me?” and “do I actually deserve this?” because even though a PhD is not really a path I’m pursuing to make others proud, I feel as though a lot of my family’s pride is wrapped up in not only what I’m doing but where I’m going to do it. There’s a fear of the unknown there, you know? I cannot easily see what comes next. I am not stepping out of my comfort zone. I am leaping several yards away from my comfort zone.
I tell people that I’m excited because I am. But I’m also a little scared. I am afraid that I’m not ready. I suppose I should take comfort in the fact that so many people seem to disagree with that.
Today I’m thankful that I managed to finish braiding my hair on time and that it looks really really nice. Also lowkey thankful that we didn’t end up going out that very night because after finishing my hair I had a 36-hour headache from it which made me super cranky (but my parts are clean and my grip was superb).
Concerts tomorrow. Honestly? Excited, but ready for them to be over.
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Pomp and Princes
Chapter 2: Knights of the Round (Ao3)
Word Count: 1247
Rating: T+
Characters: Virgil, Remy, Remus, Roman
Warnings: genderbend, fem!remy, ftm!virgil, nonbinary!remus, mtf!roman, mild sex mention
The night before he has to go on tour, Remy drags Virgil to her favorite duo’s final concert. And he just so happens to catch a certain performer’s attention
Virgil was really busy with work, taking on extra hours to stock shelves. He had to pay for a four month supply of his medication, his part of the rent for the next two months, and food. Remy was fine with handling the rent for the next year if he wanted her to, but Virgil insisted. It was a fun argument.
On top of all that, he had to learn twelve songs from sheet music. He recorded them when he had them down so he could listen to them while he worked. Remy got sick of hearing them over and over, but she didn't complain. Virgil was a fast learner and he was going to be awesome. But he needed to get out and live a little.
That's why he was here, front row, by the stage, waiting for the final act with his headphones in. Remy was shaking with excitement, staring at the stage with stars in her eyes. She never did find anyone else to go with her, which meant Virgil was going to have to deal with a late night before his 5am trip. The trunk was packed up with his stuff so that was one less thing to worry about. And Remy only wanted to worry about one thing.
"Virgie can you believe—? We're gonna get to see them so close! And then we get to meet them! Roma and Remus! I'm gonna lose it!" she squealed, aware that she was talking to the air. She didn't mind, she was too busy wondering what the "princes" were up to…
"Call time in three!" a man in a polo and khakis shouted as the twins adjusted their costumes.
"Our last show together," Roma said with a smirk, "Ready?"
"Me?" Remus asked and wiggled his mustache in thought while he adjusted his collar, "I'm ready for my next tour! Jay got a band together real quick, and he said they're not cis."
"Not even you!"
"I'm a marvelous maverique boy and I am going to rock the world! Without dressing like a gay hairdresser on Halloween!"
"Just make it through tonight," Roma said with a sad smile, "And you better send pics of all the places you get to see while I'm stuck in LA filming."
"You're not getting any pics of the people I screw!" Remus teased, making Roma's face scrunch up with disgust.
"Places!" the man in khakis shouted. It was time…
The dim lights in the house dimmed even further and a low hum rumbled from the speakers. Virgil paid it all no mind, but Remy was screaming and jumping as the stage backdrop lit up red and green and two spotlights landed center stage on dense fog.
"Ladies, Lords, and Non-binary Royalty!" A voice boomed over the speakers, it was a recording of the twins' voices merged to sound like one person but it didn't work too well. The crowd erupted into cheers as ten backup dancers skipped on stage, dressed in fairytale clothes.
"Your wait is over!" the voice boomed over the music that was picking up. The dancers on stage moved fluidly with the beat while the crowd lost its cool.
"Oh my god, Virgie! They're starting with 'No Holding Back' I can't even!" Remy squealed, only to find Virgil still listening to his playlist—emo song, song he had to learn, emo song, song he had to learn, and so on. He was just jamming with his eyes closed, so Remy could still live if she pulled an earbud out to gush. But she didn't want to lose her hand.
Remy didn't bother worrying about her friend, not when the duo of the evening rose up in the middle of the stage.
Roma and Remus shared a look when the platform stopped and grinned. It was showtime! They strode forward, in sync, past the dancers and to the front of the stage. The crowd went absolutely apeshit! But a certain person in the front row caught Remus' attention as he performed.
Virgil was too busy to care about the uproar. He was lounging in his seat, mimicking how to move his fingers on the frets for his gig. He didn't notice Remy losing her mind and squealing because Remus was looking their way, more than just once.
Truth be told, Remus was confused, there were so many people who wanted to see Pomp and Princes, so many people who would kill for a ticket, and yet someone who didn't want to pay any attention to the performance was seated in the most expensive seats! And he wasn't even a parent! He was lucky that the oddity wasn't throwing him off—just the guy's hotness.
Roma was good at subtly keeping him on track through their entire set list, and she did a lot more talking between songs, which Remus was fine with. He was tired and sweaty and he wanted to get out of his costume and find that Gerard Way-looking hottie in the hoodie before he left.
"Thank you so much for your support and applause!" Roma said after the second last song, "This is as you know, our last performance!" A discontented rumble reached them from the crowd.
"I know, I know," Remus sighed, "But we're ogre it! We have to move forward. So for our last song, let's make it count. If you know the words, sing along!"
"Where have all the good men gone and where are all the guards?" Roma sang acapella, "Where's the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising wars?"
"Isn't there a dark knight, upon a fiery steed? Late at night, I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need!" Remus continued, butchering the lyrics. The crowd went nuts again, everyone shouting at the top of their lungs, one phrase took over the venue:
"Hit it!"
The music started, rising in a crescendo just like the cheers from the crowd. The backup dancers were in full swing and the twins pulled their prop swords from their belts. What kind of princes wouldn't have a staged sword fight!?
By this point, Virgil's ipod had died and he was not about to waste his phone battery. He lazily glanced at Remy, who was standing up and flipping out, and then to the stage.
How those two managed to keep singing in key and in time and then sparring like in the Princess Bride, and then back was beyond him. He was impressed, sure, but he wanted to get out of there and out of his binder, and maybe hit up the nearest diner with Remy. He didn't expect to get any sleep that night anyway.
"I need a hero!" Roma sang the last line of the song and fell to her knees. Remus was a few feet in front of her, and he charged, prop sword drawn. He leapt onto the air and flipped over Roma while the pyrotechnics near the back of the stage went off, silhouetting the duo. Remus stuck the landing holding his sword in the air with one hand on his hip. The crowd lost it and then the lights went out.
"Holy shit! Virgie!" Remy screamed and grabbed her friend by the shoulders, "That was like so epic!—Ohemgee, get up! We're going backstage right now!" Virgil pushed her back and got up, rolling his neck with a satisfying pop.
"Let's get this over with," he sighed. Remy was too happy to really dampen her mood.
I update this on Ao3 faster than here fyi
#sanders sides#virgil sanders#remy sanders#ftm!virgil#fem!remy#remus sanders#nonbinary!remus#roman sanders#mtf!roman#genderbend#eventual dukexiety#sex mention tw#pomp and princes au#sandyscribed
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The boyband I was obsessed with in high school is reuniting and I am seeing them live next week (!!!) so it seemed like the time to share my David/Patrick boyband AU again!
Rated T || 2,269 words
David is always met with a wave of anxiety before a performance. He’ll be fine once he sings his first note, but right now his heart is pounding, threatening to beat right out of his chest. The cheers from the crowd are ringing in his ears as he looks out at the sea of glowing cell phones, their light penetrating the darkness like constellations of stars. A video screen starts a countdown in huge luminous numbers. He glances over at Patrick; he’s staring into the arena in awe, his smile more radiant than the stage lights will be when they whir to life in thirty seconds. He turns his smile on David and David feels time freeze, his world narrowing to Patrick as an answering smile forms on his face.
“Let’s do this,” Patrick mouths.
Or, David and Patrick are in a boyband and it's their biggest concert yet.
Read on AO3
Bonus! Read an (unedited) snippet of the sequel that’s been in my drafts for over a year!
The thing about dating Patrick while on tour is that there is literally no privacy.
After months of sneaking glances when he thought Patrick wasn’t looking, of imagining what Patrick’s strong calloused hands would feel like on his skin, of wondering if Patrick’s perfect pink lips are as soft as they look, David is finally allowed to just kiss him, but there’s nowhere to do it and it’s driving him insane. When they’re not on a tiny tour bus that they share with two other guys, they’re in a dressing room that they share with two other guys, or they’re doing sound check or press or the actual concert.
Every night, Patrick leaves the stage in his leather jacket and tight pants, his smile wide, his cheeks flushed, his hair wild, and David wants to wreck him. Instead he gets to kiss him in two to four minute intervals while waiting for Ronnie to yell at them that they’re running late for something. It’s not ideal.
They’re in their fourth city in as many days, waiting in the dressing room while the opening act performs. Patrick is sipping his traditional pre-show tea, Ted is doing his traditional pre-show stretches, and Ken is sitting in the corner, headphones in, listening to his traditional pre-show playlist. David stops his traditional pre-show pacing and sidles up next to Patrick on the couch. He has an idea.
“If you finish that, we could sneak out and watch the opening act,” he says, keeping his voice low and trying to make it sound seductive.
Patrick takes another sip of his tea. “You want to watch the opening act? It’s been a month and you’ve never wanted to watch.”
“Mhm.” He raises his eyebrows and looks into Patrick’s eyes. “I want to watch the opening act.”
“Yeah, I got that. That’s what you literally just said.” David watches Patrick’s throat as he swallows another sip of tea and god he just really wants to get his mouth on the delicate skin there. How is Patrick not getting this?
David sighs. “I want to leave this dressing room and go find a dark corner to make out in.”
Patrick’s lips quirk up. “Gotcha.” He takes a gulp of his tea and sets the mug down on the table next to the couch. “Yeah, we can do that.”
They get up from the couch and head towards the door. Unfortunately, the dressing room is a small space and Ted and Ken both have eyes.
“Hey, where are you going?” Ted asks, mid-lunge with his arms stretched up towards the ceiling.
“Oh, uh, just going to watch the opening act. From the wings. Nothing exciting,” David says, gripping the handle of the door.
“I’ve actually been meaning to watch them!” Ken pipes up, pulling a headphone out of his ear and scrambling to his feet. How did he even hear them? Nothing has ever disturbed his pre-show ritual before, but apparently there’s a first time for everything. David glances over at Patrick, who looks adorably flustered, a pink blush creeping into his cheeks.
“Cool. Well, we’ll, uh, meet you there,” David says, opening the door and lightly pushing Patrick into the hallway. Maybe if they hurry, they can disappear before Ken catches up.
“I’ll come too!” Ted. Of course. “We should all support the other band!”
“Sure,” David sighs, resigned to his fate. He ends up holding the door open for both Ted and Ken and the four of them head to the wings to watch the opening act. The band is actually pretty good and halfway through, Patrick sneaks his fingers under David’s shirt and rubs circles into his back which almost makes up for another failed attempt at privacy. Almost.
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ahh i’m so mad for forgetting it was tpn’s 6th anniversary today.. i dunno how i can never remember that date. i don’t have anything planned though, which sucks because it’s kinda the most important day of the series ya know?? HOWEVER! i already finished my edit for emma’s birthday last week, so that’s pretty darn early for me! okay so it’s like 99% done, i gotta figure out one final touch, but yeah. and then isabella’s should be next but that’s not til september anyways. i remember very few birthdays..still upset i forgot about today though! i know i can always post something later this week but then it’s late! and that’s even if i get an idea in the first place hhmmm..
but in my defense it was an important day for me for a completely different reason though.. little Kona turned one today!!! love her. she’s too cute. she actually shares a birthday with my late great grandmother so that’s kinda sweet. (maybe now i won’f forget tpn’s anniversary either)
aside from that i feel like last week was real busy/eventful. dad had actually tested positive for covid tuesday so since we had dinner together the day before i worked from home all last week just to make sure i was okay (which i am thankfully). i don’t mind working from home, it allows me to sleep in a bit but having two screens instead of three is always a troublesome adjustment, and annoying if things get too stressful. every now and then there’s also some nights where i can’t even fall asleep and just feel incredible anxious..why i dunno. it feels random honestly.
it hasn’t been all bad though. i decided to read ahead with the paripi koumei manga and oh my god, the love i have for eiko is IMMENSE!! i honestly wasn’t expecting to get more of her backstory, but i’m so happy we did. i thought we were just gonna focus on the summer sonia concert stuff next, but it seems that is gonna be the final goal. so i’m really loving the direction the manga is going now with creating more songs and learning more of eiko’s past/family. it just makes sense. i debated in writing a whole post on it but idk yet, we’ll see. i dunno how often the manga updates, but i’ve only seen sites have up to ch49? but aahh i want her to succeed so badly! i really hope we get another season because i need to hear more of her lovely voice! THEN i forget what day i read ch113 of ft 100yq but MMHHMM that gruvia body swap! their reactions were great and i loved every moment and of course i’m looking forward to see how gray fights with juvia’s magic. i’m eagerly waiting for the day we get a trailer for the anime too.
then finally.. FINALLY the black clover manga is back! and i still think it’s hilarious that the three month hiatus started right as i finished the anime, like of course that’s just my luck! i think i caught up for just two new chapters then poof! break time! my friend has been begging me to watch since the anime started so i pushed it off for years, til something just.. clicked within me? i remember the movie trailer was announced months ago and friend was excited about it and naturally tried to convince me to start the series once more and i dunno exact words, but i’m pretty sure he compared it to fairy tail (which i sorta figured from the start anyways) but then said everyone from the squad got more focus/backstory, and i was like.. oh? so, that kinda did it for me. and damn it, i ended up loving the series. a lot. but better late than never i suppose! (and he totally has the right to say “told you so,” he deserved it. he even predicted that vanessa would end up as my favorite. so he’s right. again.) so sorry not sorry for all the spam. my queue was filled over 250+ at one point and stayed like that for weeks because i just kept adding more to it. it’s finally back around 50ish now because i FINALLY gone through the whole anime yet again (why do i queue all the gifs chronologically? i dunno!! i forget which series i started doing this with but now it feels necessary for me to do so! lowkey kinda hate it, makes it seem like i’m insane ahaaa. but now all that’s left is artwork that i can fangirl over, thank god!)
but now that the manga is back i’m debating on writing chapter reviews for it, though i doubt they’ll be as long as those i’ve done for tpn, but hhmmm. it’s just funny how i decide on doing such a thing whenever a series enters their final arcs. well, i say that but i haven’t done any for mha in.. years. probably won’t start those up though. i still read it sure but the story is meh to me sometimes. i enjoy the characters more and unfortunately those i really love don’t get much spotlight, maybe just a moment or two recently. always debating on reading ahead for no guns life too since i have no clue if the anime is gonna continue, but i definitely won’t for fire force since season3 has at least been confirmed, whenever.. same with tokyo revengers even though i’m getting real tempted with that one. and for the love of god i have to remember to read the psycho pass manga still! or however much i can find of it anyways!
what else is happening in my world right now, umm. almost a month away from splatoon3 thank god. i haven’t played my switch in a hot minute but once i got that then mmmhmm it’s over. then. scarlet & violet a couple months after too. OH! pokemon.. the masters 8 tournament has been bittersweet for me. the battles are rushed, even most take one episode, some of the moves and outcomes are just.. upsetting and strange. like i’ll never get over how dirty the writing handled the leon vs alain match. my boy deserved so much better. lance vs diantha was okay i guess and ya knew cynthia was gonna win against iris no problem. but then that battle with steven and ash.. idc what people say but there’s no way he should’ve won. after all that damage pikachu took from mega-metagross, he wins by one z-move and an iron tail of all things?? what?? (i think? i dont remember, i was annoyed). only bright side are all the cameos we’ve been getting. they only last a few seconds but they grant me SO MUCH happiness! seeing mairin, the johto trio, drew AND harley?? my heart was ecstatic! and i’m sure they’ll save all of ash’s traveling companions for his final match with leon, or at least i’m hoping so. i better see may and serena again darn it!
oh, and no joke but i swear i actually had a fucking contestshipping dream last night, which isn’t too surprising since i do indeed love them very much, but it was just randomly timed? like why now and not last month around their actual day when i rewatched all their episodes ya know?? but whatever. all it was was drew calling up may after some contest lose (in johto im assuming) to cheer her up. then some light teasing of course. that’s all i needed.
sometime during my incoherent rambling i did get an idea for an tpn anniversary edit. so i’ll definitely start on something for it tonight or tomorrow, unless i get caught up playing more pmd sky.. i started a randomizer yesterday and i’m enjoying myself. nostalgia hitting hard. but i would seriously love a new mystery dungeon.
#talking to myself#edit: as im posting this i just noticed a pokemon presents was announced for august 3rd! HELL YEAAHH more scarlet & violet news babyyy!!!!
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nicky byrne one-shot
𝓲𝓶𝓪𝓰𝓲𝓷𝓮 - byrne squared (part two of so much blood)
𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 - fluff, mentions of miscarriage, infertility, hospital, happy tears, pregnancy, happy ending
𝓭𝓮𝓼��𝓻𝓲𝓹𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 - a couple of months after her miscarriage, it was found out that alessandra byrne, nicky byrne's wife, was pregnant again and was finally able to give her husband nicky the one thing he's always wanted
𝓪𝓾𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓻'𝓼 𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓮 - praise the lord, this is an original one-shot that has not been reused and recycled thank god. i already knew i wanted to do part two of "so much blood" so i am so glad i got to. this will be a lot happier than the first part but the miscarriage will be talked about in an italicised flashback by an instagram post posted by alessandra even though it didn't exist in 2007, when nicky's twins, rocco and jay were born, pretend it did. and like part one, this will be in lowercase. enjoy my lovely dovelies.
masterlist
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alessandrabyrne all my life, i knew i wanted to be a mother and that my husband wanted to be a father. so, we started trying but no matter how hard we tried, we always had a negative result which always broke our hearts because we thought we were doing something wrong and constantly wondering why we were never getting pregnant. and then, out of sheer desperation, we stopped actively trying to get pregnant and one day, finally, after what felt like we had been trying forever, the one time we weren't actively trying, there was a positive pregnancy test. and we were so excited, even though we still grieved over the losses of all the negatives, we were just glad that i could actually get pregnant to give nicky and me our first ever baby and it was all truly going to plan and both baby and me were healthy as could be. that was until, at five months, heartbreaking, during a westlife concert during their number one's tour, i miscarried at the london o2 show and lost what would have been me and nicky's little baby girl. no one can prepare you for losing a baby but also a baby that was the only positive after so many negatives just breaks you even more. i wish i could explain how disgusted i felt in knowing that i couldn't even give my husband and i the singular thing that we had both wanted our entire lives. for ages, i hated myself because my body couldn't do the one thing it was supposed to do. and for so long, all i could do was apologise to nicky because he didn't deserve to lose his baby. he didn't deserve to have his wife miscarrying what was going to be his beautiful baby girl. nicky, babe, even though i've constantly been saying it, i don't think i'll ever be able to stop saying it until i am able to give you our gorgeous baby girl so, again, i am so, so incredibly sorry that i couldn't give you what you so desperately want in your life. i am so sorry i can't give you your little princess or even a little prince but, in saying that, i'll never give up, i won't stop trying until i can give us our little princess or little prince!
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nickybyrneinsta oh aless, you don't need to apologise! it's not your fault babe! you need to stop apologising!
alessandrabyrne nickybyrneinsta i love you nicko. it was an honour to even carry baby byrne for those short five months and i hope next time i'll carry it all the way to term for us
caileano when are you going to stop apologising, alessandra? it's not your fault and it never will be. nicky is not mad at you and he never could be!
alessandrabyrne caileano i love you cailean. and you nor mark will ever owe me, noah, arlo, michaela and noelle an apology, ever! don't even try to apologise because you and mark are not at fault either
markusmoments as always, my heart breaks over this. but one day i promise you'll give you and nicky a beautiful baby, just don't stop trying alessandra
alessandrabyrne markusmoments so does mine, mark. and thank you, i haven't stopped trying as i am determined as hell to have this baby and hand it over to nicko
stormykeating my heart aches over this! but it heals because of how courageous and strong you are to even talk about it when it's something that many women don't talk about! ro and i send all our love, hugs and kisses to you and nicky
alessandrabyrne stormykeating thank you for the kind words stormy, i love you and ronan so much, your guys' support has been amazing!
jodialbert you are superwoman, alessandra! thank you for speaking up about this even though it's difficult, you'll help a lot of women out there by posting about this my darling
alessandrabyrne jodialbert oh stop it, jodi! but, thank you, i was at first hesitant but quickly realised that if i do talk about it, it'll be a lot more helpful than just ignoring it and not talking about it!
just as nicky byrne, alessandra byrne's husband predicted and maybe even manifested, two weeks after posting about the miscarriage of her and nicky's baby, alessandra found out that after she and nicky really stopped trying that she was once again pregnant with her and nicky's baby. and it was predicted that baby byrne was going to be due in june of 2007. however, for the safety and consolation of the byrne's, they didn't announce the pregnancy until their ireland show when nicky mentioned that, once again, he and alessandra were going to become pregnant and thanked his wife. and then after that, alessandra announced it with some photos of her through a series of pregnancy bumpdates to her blog with the sweetest caption. but that was until after nicky had announced it on stage so let's just say it was just happy news on top of happy news after wht was such devastation for alessandra and nicky.
ireland show
"---good evening ireland!" nicky announces after the band sings their 2003 record of the year hit, mandy as the crowd cheers
"this is westlife's the love tour! we are so excited to back on stage in front of all of you guys, umm, the love tour is here and we are here to celebrate westlife so, thank you guys so much and, i just have to say that...i'm about to become a father..." nicky pauses as the crowd screams and cheers
"thank you... it's been a tough time since my wife, alessandra sadly miscarried late last year so, we're excited to announce that not only are we pregnant but we are pregnant with twins..." the crowd screams even more as he then hears his bandmates, kian, shane and mark cheer and applaud, making nicky laugh as well as alessandra and the rest of the wives and spouses who were watching from the barricades in front of the stage
"...so, umm, that's some exciting news that i've kind of been getting really impatient about revealing..." nicky gets cut off by his bandmates' cheering again, making him laugh as he continues
"...yeah, we wanted to keep this as secretive as we possibly could, alessandra and i and, we're just so excited to meet our babies!" nicky smiled tearfully as a shy chuckle left his mouth
"umm, anyway, moving forward, this next song is if i let you go all the way back to the beginning of westlife--" nicky then continues as he introduces the next song after dedicating the song to alessandra
alessandra couldn't help but tear up as she watched her husband get so excited to announce that this time, he was really going to become a father and that she was going to be a mother after thinking they weren't going to be able to be parents.
then, she cried even more when nicky sang to her during his verse, ultimately thanking her, his wife, for making his one true wish finally come true. shane, kian and mark then interacted with her during the song and then after a couple more songs, it was a break in between quick changes and they got to give a quick set of hugs and kisses to alessandra and the two baby byrnes.
*
by the time the concert finished, it seemed as though everyone on social media and alessandra's blog were talking about the fact that alessandra and nicky were becoming parents again after the miscarriage of their first one. now, all the fans were waiting for was actual confirmation by alessandra so, alessandra gave her fans and the westlife fans what they were waiting for and did confirm that she was pregnant with her and nicky's twins.
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alessandrabyrne it's with the greatest plasure and privilege to announce that, after the on-stage announcement at the ireland westlife gig tonight from my husband nicky that i am indeed pregnant with nicky and i's twins. it was as though my husband had either manifested it or just knew that a few months after posting about the miscarriage of our first pregnancy, i fell pregnant again and was a lot further along than originally thought. so, i am so very pleased to announce that baby byrne squared should be ready to pop out sometime around june. it devastated me, as i documented, that i miscarried what would have been me and nicky's first baby but finding out i was pregnant again after not actively trying that i couldn't believe how blessed i was to be able to get a second chance at making me and my husband's dream come true. i love you so bloody much nicko that, it's the greatest privilege to be able to give you and me twin babies and it's been the best thing i've ever genuinely done in my life and it's all i've ever wanted in my life and that's to see you happy and to have our little family together of our own. the countdown for baby byrne squared is now on!
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nickybyrneinsta jesus christ, alessandra, i love you so much! watching you this entire time you've carried baby byrne squared has been astounding, you are truly a pro at this! i cannot wait for the day we meet them!
alessandrabyrne nickybyrneinsta i love you even more nicko! and thank you, you're too kind, if i'm a pro, what are you because you've also been spectacular as well! and i can't wait either, it's going to be the best day ever!
caileano ahh, it's getting so close! it feels like we can just touch baby byrne squared due date and they'll be here soon!
alessandrabyrne caileano i know right? it's going to fly by so quickly and then boom, you and marky will be uncles to two beautiful little twins forever and ever!
jodialbert this post has made me so happy! seeing nicky get to announce, again, to a crowd of many that he's becoming a father but also to twins was for sure a moment that'll be unforgettable
alessandrabyrne jodialbert oh tell me about it! i wanted to post it before nicky announced it but i decided to wait since i wanted him to announce it before anyone else could. and i know, i was bawling my eyes out when he announced it, especially when i noticed the reactions of kian, nicky and shane behind him!
kianegan i still cannot believe nicky waited until the show tonight to tell us that you're having twins!
alessandrabyrne kianegan you're telling me?! i thought you guys already knew! which is probably why i started bawling my eyes out when i saw your guys' reactions on stage lol
markusmoments not gonna lie, i was a little bit stunned and maybe teary-eyed when nicky announced you guys were having twins
alessandrabyrne markusmoments so was i! i genuinely thought he had already told you three!
shanefilanofficial wow, still not over the fact you and nicky will be parents to twins!
alessandrabyrne shanefilanofficial so am i and i'm carrying the twins for us!
gillianfilansligo you and nicky will be the best parents in the entire world!
alessandrabyrne gillianfilansligo here here gillian! i agree!
rokeating oh this is just spectacular news! i'm so glad you didn't give up trying!
alessandrabyrne rokeating oh, thank you so much ronan! you're too sweet! me, nicky and the unborn twins send all our love to you and stormy xx
*
then, surprising absolutely everyone, six weeks earlier then their due date, twin boys rocco bertie and jay nicky byrne were born on the 20th of april. in holles street dublin hospital via c-section, alessandra gave birth to the twins. then, it wasn't until very recently that the new parents got to bring their babies home due to how small they were, having to stay in incubators for four to five weeks to get to the correct healthy weight to leave the hospital.
to announce the arrival of rocco and jay, fans waited until the parents brought rocco and jay home before they got to see the post of the happy parents with their twin boys.
liked by alessandrabyrne, jodialbert, kianegan and 95,765 others
nickybyrneinsta rocco and jay byrne. mum and boys are happy and healthy x
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alessandrabyrne the sweetest little boys in the world!
jodialbert i feel like christmas came early! i love you four so much 💙💕💙
nickybyrnefan congratulations nicky and alessandra! rocco and jay are gorgeous
username congratulations nicky and alessandra! and congratulations to your wife for healthily delivering her 💕
liked by nickybyrneinsta, shanefilanofficial, gillianfilansligo, kianegan and 992,34k others
alessandrabyrne born six weeks early, here they are everyone, little boys rocco and jay was born safe and sound. it may have been a tough delivery but the relief nicko and i had when we saw our two little boys at the end of it was all that mattered! rocco and jay, daddy and mummy love you so much! welcome to the byrne family, you'll love it!
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nickybyrneinsta our gorgeous boys, aless! we have our little family now!
shanefilanofficial oh aren't they just gorgeous little things! congratulations nicky and alessandra!
kianegan oh, what gorgeous boys they are! they are already so loved! congratulations nicky and alessandra, they are beautiful!
username congratulations alessandra and nicky! rocco and jay are just gorgeous!
jodialbert rocco and jay are going to be the most gorgeous and loved little boys in the world!
baby rocco and jay were born safe and sound... nicky got his one true wish to come true... he has finally got his missing piece... he's the father to an already beautiful rocco and jay with his wife alessandra.
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this was fun to make after the depressing first part haha! also, i know the timeline may have been messy even though it was during the 2007 tour when georgina (nicky's actual wife) had her water's breaking but i just know they were in ireland when it happened. anyway, i hope you enjoyed this!
ok ily bye xx
wc; 2697
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sat mar 25th, 2023
rainy day and i’m really enjoying margaret by lana so much. the way she says the first couple of lines gives me goosebumps. it just reminds me of how i feel sometimes. like oh god here we go, let’s see how this goes.
alex said i looked good today when he brought over my hot chocolate. he’s always so kind to me. he’s a lot younger but i feel like he’s the kind of guy that would be good for me. someone who just oozes kindness and has been through a lot but isn’t warped. i guess i can’t really know what he’s like, but he feels warm. it’s easy to feel how people are in how they interact, even the basics. i don’t really love wearing makeup and i don’t wear much but i often feel like i’m treated better when i do… sigh
i had a lot of dreams last night that i’ve forgotten. before i fell asleep i thought about how cozy i was with ado. i miss the feeling of being held a bit. not by him specifically. ah. it would be good for me to never see him again. i do wonder.. will it? i hope i’ll be okay. in fact, i know i will be. shaken up doesn’t mean that it’s going to affect me that much. life is so like this. it’s so much!
yesterday was so pleasant because both victoria came in and nancy. both of them give me so much energy. i get so excited. she ended up taking a pic of me when she was leaving the store. and invited me to a concert tonight. maybe i’ll go? can’t quite decide. i feel like i need to keep focusing on myself so i don’t get lost in others. don’t want to attach to this person who probably would be averse to it. but honestly, i respect other peoples’ boundaries so well. i’m mostly in need of protecting my own.
time goes by. i stand. i sit. i remember. it’s been almost 5 months alone. 9 months alone was my longest. a year alone seems like the right timeline for now. i’m not ready for anyone. i want to be ready and be the full loving person i know i am. i’m already improving so much and being so vulnerable with my friends and new friends. currie and i, as well as me, ezra, and ryan, have the healthiest relationships i’ve ever had. actual trust, actual closeness. it took time. i have had moments where i demonized and wanted to run away, but i haven’t.
as for morgan, i notice my resentfulness. i send her responses and she can’t return any comment. she sends me stuff and i respond back but i feel myself not truly feeling like doing it. because my needs aren’t being met. and like i’ve come to notice, my expectations have been like -1. we’ll see. i’m going to talk to her when we hang out. state again that i need commitment when it comes to friendship. i want to be interacted with. not just someone you send a few things to do and that’s it.
work is going fine and next next week i’m going to ask for both a raise and for tips to be add to cut flower purchases.
a little bothered that my gyno didn’t test for hpv. that’s literally the reason i wanted a pap smear… so i sent a message to her. if she doesn’t get back, i’ll call. health is a priority.
i want to make another paper cutout tonight. actually watch a movie. do yoga. i don’t think i would actually enjoy a concert tonight. also, depends on price… i’ll think about it.
happy to be alive. i’m doing it.
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I’ve been good! It’s been almost a year since I moved out, happy to be getting away from my psycho housemate soon enough (loooong story but I have 2 housemates, one is fine but the other may be literal Satan).
I started work at my new job and got promoted last month! Still a big learning curve and a high stress environment but it’s Hollywood. Dreams will come true…maybe. Eventually. I’m a talent assistant, which comes with its perks (networking, reading unproduced scripts, working with celebrity clients, I helped pitch a show to a major streamer last week) and downsides (most of which are sleep and personal time).
I also have a boyfriend! I’ve been dating him since last spring and we’ve been official since the summer (broke up for a month, also a long story) but we got back together and are stronger than ever. I’ve actually been trying to figure out which members he reminds me of the most but I keep pulling a blank (my friends out here aren’t huge KPoppies) maybe you can help?
Anywho, I’ve just been working hard (and playing hard, plenty to do out here) and am excited for the NCT Dream world tour! I saw 127 while they were out here (and SKZ, MX, KCon) so I’m hyped for what’s coming next.
- ⛅️ Anon
oh god, psycho housemates, i totally understand. wishing you the best of luck with that whole situation!
but congrats on the new position AND promotion! aaah hollywood?! you’re so close yet so far from me because i’m in the bay 🥲 that job sounds amazing, i hope you’re enjoying it!! i’ve had friends from my old job at disneyland become talent assistants so i know a lil about what it requires and it’s def a lot. proud of u!!!
OMG AND A BOYFRIEND?!? CONGRAAAATS, B!!! and i’m glad to help u!!!
work hard, play hard is the goal! and omg you were at 127 in LA too? i was on the floor!! maybe see you at dream? i’d love to meet up IF AND ONLY IF you’re comfortable! (i tried to meet cee during 127 but the concert started by the time i was gonna make my way up to her 🙃 i got the days off already HAHA my friends in my grad program were like “idk how you juggle all these vacations during school” but i was like “these are needed” 🤡
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hello mel! it’s your skz secret santa!! i just came to say hi! i’m so excited to get to know you over the next month💚❤️ so how’s you get into skz? and what made minho your bias?
-🍒
hello hello!!! i am excited too hehe :D
i am actually a baby stay because i only got into skz in like mid october but i really fell all in so it doesn't feel like it's only been a month or so 😂 i actually don't remember exactly what made me get into skz, they were on the periphery of my radar bc i had moots who liked them and i had heard some of their songs like gods menu and back door, but i never really got into them for some reason. and then i started listening to their music more intently in oct (right before the nct concert i was able to go to lol) and it just really hit?? i started with noeasy which is such a banger album to start with honestly lol and still one of my favs and then i discovered lino and that kinda sealed the deal, the rest is history LOL
oh i could talk about lino forever hahahaha i will try to keep it short...i mean first off hes so handsome i cry lol but i also love watching him dance bc it makes it look so effortless even though i'm sure it's not, and he always looks like he's having so much fun on stage 🥺🥺 i love his little giggles and his laugh. and also hes so weird lol i love the stuff that comes out of his mouth. this video captures his antics in a nutshell and never fails to make me laugh hehe <3 i also love how he he quietly takes care of others, and the way he loves his cats and his members 🥺 I JUST LOVE HIM
ok but enough about me lol who is your skz bias??? and what was your skz/kpop origin story :))
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