"Count Binface has unveiled his manifesto for the London Mayoral election, including a pledge to force Thames Water bosses to "take a dip in the Thames" to "see how they like it".
"In the manifesto, Binface vowed to "build at least one affordable house", ban "loud snacks" from theatres and demolish the Millennium Dome to make way for a nature reserve.
Shops will also be banned from selling croissants for more than £1.10 - a repetition of a commitment made by Binface at the last Mayoral election in 2021.
London Bridge will be named after actress Phoebe Waller-Bridge and Ceefax will be brought back, Binface said."
May 2's election day will show how bad things are for Tories
With two weeks to go, ANDREW FISHER focuses in on your three, or four, votes in Croydon. PLUS: how you can make sure you have proper photo ID for election day
Every Croydon voter will have at least three votes to use on Thursday May 2.
X marks the spot: who gets your vote for London Mayor?
You get one vote for London Mayor, and have two votes to choose your representatives on the Greater London…
London Mayor Sadiq Khan Announces Free School Meals and TFL Fares Freeze after Online Question Time
We’ve taken action to ease financial pressure on Londoners by providing free school meals, freezing TfL fares and building record numbers of council homes. I’m extremely proud of what we’ve delivered and will continue to deliver: A better, fairer, and greener London for all.
The mayor and London Assembly are required by law to hold two PQT events a year, with the public meetings – a place where…
London Mayor Reacts To Stampede At Asake’s Concert
London Mayor Reacts To Stampede At Asake’s Concert
Sadiq Khan, the mayor of London, has expressed sympathy for those hurt by the stampede that happened outside a South London club where Nigerian Afrobeats star Asake was performing.
London Mayor Reacts To Stampede At Asake’s Concert
When emergency personnel arrived at the location at 9.35 p.m. in response to reports of crowd disturbances, they discovered “a number of people with injuries suspected…
Today I helped a nice Irish man who got separated from the ceasefire protest double check his directions to the US Embassy and he nodded to me and said "obviously your president-"
And my mum went "NO! WE'RE FROM YORKSHIRE"
Then they bonded over being beaten up at Catholic school before he continued on his way.
Khan's 'life-changing' free school meals extended for extra year
The Mayor of London, Sadiq Khan, has today confirmed that all primary school children in state-funded schools in the capital will continue to get free school meals for the next academic year, providing £140million extra funding as the cost-of-living crisis continues to hit families.
Mayor Khan said that he recognises that families are in urgent need of support. The meals will help with the…