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kikker-oma · 4 months

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hi friend!

idk how you phrase this but like

How do you draw bodies

because your art style is so good and I’m trying to find mine but people just don’t make sense to me 🥲

but aside from that, how is your day been?

Line of Action - best for figure drawing practice

@mellon-soup - has an INCREDIBLE repetoir of pose references. Here's their insta handle!

PROKO - has a lot of really great drawing fundamental resources on their YouTube channel for free. They also have paid online courses that go more in depth!

PoseManiacs - I used this when I was trying to learn and practice poses as well!

@miyuliart - on Twitter (or X , whatever it is) has a lot of great posts regarding pose study and anatomy! She even has some books for purchase too.

Lovely Blare, you are so sweet!! I'm glad you like my art style ❤️ it's definitely still being developed and I'm no master, but. I'm having fun building up my skills!

See below the break for more info cus this is kinda long lol

Above I've listed just a few of the many many many resources out there to study poses. These tend to be the people I look to most for references, tho they aren't the only ones!

If you're looking to practice and get better at anatomy and the fluidity of your poses, I would suggest starting by drawing actual people first. That way you know how real bodies move and twist and turn and what masclues go where. It makes simplifying and stylizing easier down the road!

Something I did a LOT, and honestly still do a lot, is find pictures of people or art of characters whose poses I like and just try to draw what I see. I have sketchbooks fuuulll of poses I copied just to practice! Tracing can definitely have it's value as well when you're learning!

I utilize Pinterest a lot to creat difference boards for reference photos I may need, and it's come in handy quite often!

I can show you how *I * draw bodies in general, but know that I kind of flub around until something starts to feel right haha. I'm still learning and practicing as well! How I draw bodies may now work for you and that's chill! Its all about trying out lots of different styles and seeing what you like best, or what methods make sense to you.

Fair warning: this probs isn't the most accurate tutorial, I just kinda threw something down as a general example hehe. I'm preaching about references but didn't want to use one at the moment cus I'm tired haha

Often my sketches are much messier and I just make lots of lines so I can find the "right one" lol.

These are some sketches I did for Peggys fan art!

Basically, just keep practicing until it eventually starts to look right lol

#sweet blarefordaglare #art advice #sorry this was so long #im still a novice tbh #study better artists than me #im just out here having fun haga

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bluravenite · 11 months

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Hey I know I'm a total stranger but I follow you and I think your art is really cool! I wanted to ask what brush is best on Procreate? New to digital art and I'm trying to make art of my own characters. Taking a lot of inspo from you!!

I am of the firm belief that most basic brushes are real good!! I came from clip studio so i was mainly used to charcoal/pastel feeling pencils, as well as REALLY smooth/textured inking brushes and LOTS of opacity, which i think has changed but you can still see the influence??

I am also an avid hater of procreate brush settings which is why I sorta chose to modify most of my basic brushes!!

Mainly i usually pick two brushes per drawing... Sometimes I'm not feeling the same sketch brush so i tend to switch between script, Sean sketcher, hb pencil, and peppermint!

For inking i tend to do script or gesinski ink but i recently inked zephyr with the marker brush!! It was so fun!! I also sometimes ink/clean up with my sketch brushes, it can be faster.

I started using peppermint and spectra because of @purlty though i have kept spectra as a texture brush rather than for coloring :D i like it a lot

My brushes really aren't special but i have the odd habit of changing EVERY setting until i find one i enjoy so I'm going to link my brush set below!!

Make sure if you want all the brushes in Raven's set, you only download that file, and additionally you will need to download HB pencil block, and Script Sketch, to have all of my brushes, but otherwise you can pick and choose which you want!

There's also some resources on how to modify brushes/import them and some REAL good tips and tricks i have found to make the program more usable, however!! It's a learning curve and it will only get easier with time, I've been using procreate as my main program for a year now and I still sometimes have to go back to clip studio or traditional art to be able to get a grasp haha!!!

↓ ↓ ↓ !!

youtube

These videos are A LOT OF INFORMATION but will likely help you get a good grasp of BASIC procreate functions! My suggestion is, don't take everything to heart, because you actually won't use a lot of the things they show, just stick with what you understood and are interested in using!! You don't have to master it right away :D

Most importantly i am very happy to be able to help you with this, even if you are just a stranger, so am I! And when i started with art programs and digital art I had to spend YEARS trying to figure out how to be like the artists i looked up to without being able to buy so many of the cool brushes and expensive software, so anything i can do to help, even if it's just sharing my already modified basic brushes so that you don't have to fidget with all the settings!! I'm more than happy to do!! And i really hope this helps you and anyone else who might need em!

#raven helps with art!#bluravenite resources #raven rambles #sorry this was so long #art resources #brushes #procreate resources #procreate brushes

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thedisablednaturalist · 2 months

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what is your favorite aquatic invertibrate?

THIS is a loaded question. I've kept this in my inbox for a while cause there's SO MANY it's hard to choose. I'm most interested in mollusca and crustacea but those are still large categories.

My favorite mollusk is Dirona albolineata, the frosted alabaster nudibranch. Absolutely gorgeous and come in my favorite color.

I pretty much love all nudibranches though. My second favorite would have to be sea butterflies, they're so weird!

And of course the animal crossing famous Clione limacina or sea angel

Academically, I'm currently researching freshwater mussels for our reintroduction project. Mussels may not be as flashy as nudibranchs, but they are extremely important for improving water quality in freshwater habitats. It's hard to choose a favorite, but one I've researched the most and have grown fondly of is Alasmidonta varicosa, the brook floater. We are hoping to eventually reintroduce it to it's previous native range. Fun fact, when you pick them up out of the water, they stick their "tongue" (foot) out.

I literally had the species name written on my giant whiteboard in the office for a few months so my boss would keep seeing it since I really wanted us to use it as a flagship species to design our reintroduction project around. Fast forward and we've gotten a grant and things are progressing nicely.

Anyway on the crustacea side that's an even harder choice. I'm always excited to see aquatic isopods and scuds. I'm probably most fond of Malacostraca (amphipods, isopods, decapods, etc.) and Branchiopoda (clam, fairy, and tadpole shrimp, and water fleas). Do not make me pick one I am unable to. I will say I have a particular soft spot for crayfish as they are the organisms I've had the most one-on-one time with (I literally have a pet crayfish named Mr Pinchy). I just love anything with pinchers (⁠ʃ⁠ƪ⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠）≧〔゜゜〕≦

First crayfish I ever held doing it's little defensive stance of Shake Em Like You Just Don't Care. Just take a look at it's mouth! The mouthparts are so cool! I love watching Mr. Pinchy eat.

My favorite macroinvertebrate would hands down be Corydalus, aka Hellgrammites, which are the larval form of Dobsonflies. I have yet to see an adult dobsonfly in person, but have been told they're terrifying and not very nice. We shall see about that. Hellgrammites are simply angry pathetic overdramatic babies and while people say they bite I've held plenty and never been bit. They will absolutely go for the other bugs in the tray so you do have to keep them in a separate container. We've lost a couple of caddisfly larvae to the jaws of the mighty hellgrammite.

Just look at it! Here's a video where I'm trying to get a good shot of it's gills (those frilly things on its underside). They roll into a defensive ball which is so endearing. I also love anything that can curl into a ball. I think they're absolutely adorable but most people tend to disagree with me ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ

TDLR I love all aquatic invertebrates so very much. I didn't even get into shrimp or coral or starfish! They make me so happy I actually have to limit how much I read about them in a day because my emotions get too big and cause me to become hyper (which is a bad combo for fibromyalgia). I'm not great at remembering information so I get to constantly relearn and rediscover things which is a blessing and a curse. This also makes taxonomy especially hard for me so let me know if I messed up somewhere.

#wrenfea.ask #thank you for your question!#sorry this was so long #I FUCKING FOUND IT #IT WAS BURIED

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floofery · 23 days

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i didn't notice art requests before... hm

cast sexuality headcanons? or just picnic sandwich, I liked your picnic art thingy for heromari week :>

decided to answer this now considering ur an anon so nobody'll recieve a notif if i post the art in the ask or just later

thank you!! Uh, last year during pride month i posted my then-headcanons if you specifically want those (if you want it enough go look im not linking it here because vomits. the art. so crusty.) i dont particularly hold any headcanons now. personally im not one for labelling things because it means if i discover other stuff in the future ill have to change labels when ive gotten used to one!! But. hmm. i guess ive always liked gay basil and straight sunny because im a sucker for angsty unrequited love (especially in this instance because its impossible for sunny to love back in the same way,,, painful,,) but like. i wouldnt want to see that be canon because it's sad. just like thinking about it occasionally. i dont really see sunny as straight though otherwise. hes multilingual he loves boys and girls

so uh, sorry about that! If you want me to draw anyone with your own headcanon pride flags id be happy to do so! but. sighs. yeah

take one of the funniest images i think ive ever seen ever instead

And for your other request! I'll probably do some more heromari in the near future. i love them dearly :3

#sorry this was SO LONG #i ended up ranting im sorry #floofposting #ask #omori #omori heromari #omori basil #omori sunny #omori sunflower #omori hero #omori mari

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redbleedingrose · 1 year

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Girldad!Eris handling skinned knees 👀 and/or tantrums (toddlers are ROUGH)

OMG Girldad!Eris when one of his babes is hurt I can't!!!

Okay, I think Eris would absolutely be a coddler when it comes to the babes. He is constantly vigilant of the girls, and making sure to keep an eye out, especially if you are taking a family stroll through the forest. You love taking the babes out whenever you can to experience the beautiful weather of Autumn, and they love nature in general. Anyway, you are out on a hike as a family, the hounds are walking ahead of the babes, and you and Eris are strolling behind them allowing for them to explore and taking pauses as needed. Twila, ever the curious babe, sees a waterfall ahead on the trail and makes a run for it. I mean this babe is toddling her way as fast as she can on her tiny legs, and you call out to her, "Slow down sweets," And the poor babe turns around to look at you mischeviously as she continues to run, giggling to herself, before she just pummels into the ground, tripping over some branch. I think Twila picks herself up in a little bit of shock as you and Eris jog over to her to make sure she hasn't hurt herself. She is already looking down at her skinned knee with fat tears streaming down her cheeks. She looks up at Eris, who has knelt down to look at her eye level, and points at her knee whimpering. OMGGGGG Eris would be sooo upset He is rushing to pick up his little girl, kissing away her tears, and brushing her hair away from her face as he rests her on his hip. "You're okay my little beloved, don't cry." Marwa begins to whimper as tears line her eyes, scared her little twin sister has been hurt. Ugh she is the best sister I cannot So you pick her up too, comforting her, "Your sister is okay sweets, just a scrapped knee." And Eris just straightens out his other arm to take her into his grasp as well.

Now he is holding both girls close to his chest, as you inspect Twila's knee and rest your hand over, using some of your magic to heal the tender skin.

Then you kiss it ever so softly, "There, Mama's kiss makes it all better."

Twila sniffles a little, fisting at her tears as Eris continues to coddle her a little, but also reminding her, "This is why we don't run without looking sweets. Okay? Let's be more careful next time."

And both the girls are just nodding up at their papa as he nuzzles into their chubby cheeks, while you press your own kisses onto their soft skin.

ALSO omg tantrums!!! Toddlers are scary!

TBH, I think Marwa and Twila are not having tantrums very often.

They are spoiled by their papa, and he rarely says no to them.

They want a tree house??? They are getting a fucking tree house.

They like the jewelry on display in the market because it sparkles??? You best believe Eris is buying three matching sets just for his babes and mate.

They want new stuffies?? They get it the next day

They want more puppies?? Puh lease, like father like daughter...

Despite being spoiled, you and Eris do a very good job at making sure the girls know how privileged they are.

You both are absolutely taking them to the women and children shelters, and they absolutely love volunteering and handing out new toys to all their new friends. They are extremely kind little girls who love their people, just like papa.

I don't think that you shy away from punishment either. If these babes are misbehaving, Eris will be a strict father as he needs to be.

But he never ever is using the methods his father used.

You both use gentle parenting, and that works really well.

Most of the time at least.

But these are babes we are talking about, little toddlers who have big emotions and don't know how to deal with them properly sometimes, so they are going to have tantrums every once and a while.

This usually happens when the girls are pretty tired, haven't taken their nap, and are just overall cranky.

Dinner will be ready in less than an hour but the girls are wanting some sweets beforehand.

And they ask mama, you say no, reminding them that dinner is soon and they can have dessert after.

And then they try to be sneaky and ask papa who is sitting across the room from where you are, thinking he hadn’t heard your response, and because papa rarely says no to them.

So when they ask Papa, and he says no??

Immediate meltdown.

I mean kicking their feet, screaming at the top of their lungs, crying... it is not a pretty sight

At this point, both you and Eris are a little frustrated. The babes just haven't been cooperative today.

So you takes a deep breathe as you clench your jaw a little bit. They are just babes, you remind yourself silently. A sudden wave of love and affection is sent down the golden thread that wraps around your heart, filling you with a gentle warmth that causes a soft smile to tug on your face.

You look up to find you mate, your perfect fucking mate, who is already staring at you with a little mirth in his eyes.

You take a deep sigh of relief as Eris walks over to your babes who are having their tantrum, knowing he is about to take care of everything. Like he always does.

He sits down on the floor, next to the crying babes, before picking up his arms, opening them wide, waiting silently, patiently, like the perfect father he is.

The girls, who are still crying, launch themselves into Papa's arms, cuddling close into his chest as he strokes their hair, reminding them to take deep breathes.

After taking a couple of deep breathes, the girls are able to calm down enough for him to set the babes in his lap, "That wasn't very kind girls, we don't throw tantrums like that do we?"

They sniffle while trying to come up with excuses, "But papa..."

And he listens intently to all of their thoughts, allowing for them to express themselves, nodding along as you make your way towards the now settled babes.

You sit down next to them, and Marwa climbs out of her papa's lap to settle onto yours, snuggling into your chest, wanting Mama’s warmth and comfort.

He gently reminds them, "Dinner will be ready in an hour, we don't want to spoil your appetite with sweets, my darlings. And papa didn't say no to sweets, he said you would be able to have them after dinner right? You are allowed to have big emotions my little beloveds. But I want you to be able to express yourself calmly, there is no need for tantrums."

And then he goes explains to the girls how they can express themselves better, without screaming or throwing themselves onto the ground.

He encourages them to take deep breathes when they have big feelings, and to do their best to explain it to mama or papa, because they are always willing to listen.

And mama and papa will always take the time to explain their reasoning to their perfect little girls.

You nod along, agreeing with your mate and husband, "I think our babes are just tired. But because you threw a tantrum when you know you could've expressed yourself calmly girls, I think for sweets, you will share a piece of pie between yourselves instead of having an individual piece. Okay little beloveds?"

And they sniffle again, both whispering out small "okay, I'm sorry mama. I'm sorry papa."

Eris just tugs you three close to him, pressing both of his babes into his chest and you into his side. Kissing their tiny foreheads and pecking your lips.

You smile down at your now calm babes, "We forgive you. Always."

Anyways, so sorry this was so long, but I loved this ask!!! Truly, Eris is the best papa to his little girls and you are the best mama.

#rose rambles #rose answers #eris x fem!reader #girldad!eris #eris vanserra acotar #acotar eris #eris x reader #marwa and twila #sorry this was so long

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pinklikeroses · 1 year

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Gotta give it look to RS for misinterpreting what her readers and critics are upset about

RS needs to understand, ppl aren’t upset persephone is in a healthier place , developing a healthy relationship with her partner—-

Ppl are upset bc of the way it was handled:

TW://…mentions of SA, R*pe, Sexual trauma..//:

She had her MC get assaulted, go to therapy once, have a ten year time skip and briefly mention that she talked to her therapist about virginity in a very textbook manner

The problem I have is that we don’t see how Persephone has healed during the decade she’s been banished in the mortal realm.

We don’t see her continue therapy, bonding with her nymph friends,mentally or emotionally process her trauma. We don’t see her exploring methods outside of therapy or being consulted by anyone. Her healing journey is practically non existent.

We get very dry tasteless glimpses of her being horny. If she’s craving sex that’s fine, if she’s sexually frustrated that’s okay too. What’s not okay is not explaining how she got to that point. How is she okay with being sexual? How does she view herself with sex? What is her own personal relationship with sex? What does sex mean to her? How is she this comfortable with being publicly horny??

I’ve already mentioned that it’s okay to show a sa victim wanting and craving sex a while ago. that it can be an empowering thing and it’s a missed opportunity that RS not only overlooked but did a terrible job at writing.

Even when Hades and Persephone talk about sex, her SA is never mentioned, not once, we’re constantly told how this is supposed to be a healthy relationship and it’s shown that it’s not.

Neither one of them mentions the assault or brings up the mental and emotional issues it could cause during, before and after sex. It just comes across as RS just wanting her characters to bone instead of getting through the important parts that have the potential to leave impact.

But also outside of her trauma persephone hasn’t really struggled?? She fled to hades shortly after her warrant was issued, hide at his place going in shopping sprees and lounging, worked on in the mortal realm for ten years, easily defeated a Titan god, lounged at hades place some more, and agreed to marry the guy and constantly wanting to work.

What has she struggles with outside of her trauma???Nothing. The writing just tries to trick u into believing that bc there’s more telling than showing.

It’s clear RS can’t take criticism I get feeling frustrated with how ppl react to your writing but instead of posting vague tweets maybe consider getting your characters and story together and be mindful of how you wrote trauma and what u need to do incorporate respectfully into your work

#me ramblings #sorry this was so long #lore olympus critical #lo critical #lo persephone

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mosneakers · 8 months

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Hello love!

Was Coraleye planned from the beginning, or was she kind of just born into your game and stole your heart? and was Tycho always the plan for her or did your game decide that fate? 🤍

hey bby ♥ I love this question thank you!!

I'd have to say a little bit of both! I knew for generation 4, I really wanted a female heir, since the previous heirs have all been males. So far, it's been a tradition that the youngest of the kids turn out to be the heir, and I wanted to stick to that with her. So I knew she'd be the youngest daughter. Years ago, I was on a color-naming website thing? looking for color names that fit the Dollow color scheme, and very quickly came up with the names Brick, Charm, and Sunglow (which I removed the 'w') then the last was Coral, which was alright. I already had a way different name picked for her at the time (Anastasia!) but on my list of sims names I had the alternate spelling "Coralie" written down, and she had heterochromia + a coral eye, so I had kind of a 'what if' moment and BOOM, CORALEYE! ✨ This was possibly years in advance, I tend to think pretty far ahead. Just like I know who Coraleye will end up with, how many kids she'll have, and what their names will be already 😉😂 Her brothers were all born in sims 3 but she was the only one to start her life in ts4 with very rough beginnings 😄 (limited cc and dog shit graphics!) Her personality, most of her storylines, and overall ability to shine and take over my simblr, well she did all that on her own 😅

AS FOR TYCHO OMG... No, none of that was planned lol!! As someone who has played the sims since the first generation (ts1!) I tend to remake a lot of the classic families. The Curious brothers and Strangetown were my absolute FAVORITES from ts2 and since I'm a chaotic mess, a lot of my creations tend to inhabit the same saves. Tycho naturally met Seymour Darling when they joined the same conspiracy theory club in Strangerville. Then Tycho went to college at the same time Glo did, I thought they'd be cute besties since they're both nerds so I let them be roommates (I even left the possibility to fliration open! 👀) and they quickly became a tight-knit group of friends. After Coraleye was introduced, that boy didn't stand a chance, and those two threw a wrench in the entire plans of the legacy!

Don't worry though, we've rerouted, and we're back on track 🚂😆

#sorry this was so long #but juicy questions get juicy answers!#simblr love #💌#Coraleye Darling #Tycho Curious #essential Coraleye information #essential tycho information #simsstuph

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pinkcori · 9 months

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I dont know if this is a touchy subject but what happened to the dsmp fangame?

Not touchy at all! (i honestly cant remember if i announced it here on tumblr)

I ended up abandoning the project (so sorry to all those that were looking forward to it!! I sort of fell out of love with what i was working on and the dsmp as a whole after techno passed (no shade to any of the creators, they're all gems). So it was a bit useless dragging it out.

My twitch chat did bring up the idea of me posting what I had done already. But it's not an idea i'm too fond of (i'd have to do extra work to make sure everyone can access everything i finished. Unfortunately i don't have time to actually do that.) Also I don't want an unfinished game out on the internet with my name if that makes sense.

(also also i've kept the youtube videos/streams I spent making of this up. I'm still proud of what i've created and still wanna be able to look back on it all.)

#SORRY THIS WAS SO LONG #literally just me rambling #and trying to answer any follow up questions people might have

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annieisyourfavourite · 7 months

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okay i finally have the time to write out an explanation of what all has been going on with me the last like, month - all the stuff i've been alluding to. this is gonna be real, real long, so story time is under the cut.

so some setup. i lived with my parents until just a few months ago. i moved out and now live with my oldest brother, sean, and his 2 (well, it's 1 now but at the time) dogs. at my parents' house, it is my mom and dad, my little brother luke, his fiancee, and my paternal grandmother who we call baba. my parents also have 4 dogs.

baba was living on her own in serbia, but she had a stroke in february, and since my dad is her only kid, we took her in. baba has a lot of needs, and so my brothers and i have been urging them to get her into a nursing home. but for some reason my parents aren't doing this, despite the fact that it would improve everyone's lives tenfold.

because see baba? has been abusive to my dad and to us for his whole life. she has some trauma-induced mental illnesses that she doesn't like to treat, which means she often isn't in the same reality as everyone else. i say this not to imply that mentally ill people are abusive. but rather her mental instability is a big factor in the way that she acts and treats people. and also, if she wasn't mentally ill, my father would probably never speak to her for all the abhorrent things she's done. he can already barely stand her, and his anger issues and trauma responses have become very intense since she's been around.

i also have been abused by baba, and so i have told my family i won't engage with her as much as possible. it was hard when i lived there. but since moving out, i've said i refuse to babysit her or be her caretaker, since i can also hardly be around her without losing my shit. i've told my parents this. when she starts ranting about her paranoid delusions, i can't handle it. if she starts getting upset, i can't handle it. i remember her locking us 4 small children under the age of 12 out of her house when she was watching us because she thought we were annoying. i feel very unsafe around her!!! very bad!!!!

so! the reason all this is relevant. is that my whole family, save myself and baba, just went on a vacation for 2 weeks to the british isles. we've known about this trip for a long time. and i set up with my oldest brother that i would watch the 2 dogs at our house while he was gone. my other brother matt, who would be joining them later, was to watch baba and the 4 dogs up there. except. i learned like 2 weeks before they left. that matt couldn't do the weekends and the end of the trip. so there were 8 days total out of 14 that he wasn't gonna be there (bc matt sucks but that's a different post). so my mother calls me. and says they need me to watch everyone during those times.

at first she had told me it was 1 weekend (like saturday and sunday) and that was it, and i agreed to it even though it sucked. but then after revealing how much it was, i started saying no, i can't do that, that's obviously too much. out of the 6 dogs, 2 of them are new puppies. and 1 of them was an old dog who was dying of cancer. the old dog also couldn't be in the same room as one of the other ones, because they'd try to kill each other.

so like. far too much for 1 person to try and take care of. i said no i won't, i can't. and my mom got so mad at me. i told her i can't psychologically handle being trapped in a house with baba for that long. she said "can't you just suck it up this one time?" i said that's not how abuse trauma works. she said "i can't believe you're trying to ruin our once in a lifetime vacation." i said i'm physically disabled and that is too much. too bad.

i kept trying to find some help. but the problem was, even if someone could watch some dogs, they couldn't do that AND watch baba. and vice versa if someone could watch baba. and i needed to be away from her. however the time for the trip came, and there was no one else to help. so my parents left! they said i don't care what you say annie, we need someone to take care of it, and if you don't, your dogs and grandmother will die without proper care.

so i did it!! because they knew i would do it if there was literally no one else. and i was begging them to try and help, try to understand the price this was going to take. my dad kinda did. but didn't do anything to help. my mom just thought it would be fine.

so for 2 weeks. i was in charge of old dying dog and puppy 24/7. and then sick baba and 4 other dogs for over half the time. on top of trying to do rehearsals for a show i'm currently in. and i couldn't handle it!! i suffered, hm. 10 mental breakdowns at least? so many dogs. so much chaos. so much cleaning up messes from the puppies because they're puppies.

i called my mom, having a breakdown, the first weekend because i was supposed to go to an event for my boyfriend's work, and baba was fighting me on the plan. it was a whole mess. i literally owe my life to kayla (@/modestclam) because she came by on her 1 day off from her 2 jobs to help.

during this time, i also had a job interview in the city because i'm unemployed. and when there. my car got towed. i'm pretty sure incorrectly, i'm trying to contest the ticket. but i was stranded in the city, disabled and alone, and i had to spend over $300 just to get to the lot and get my car back, which i simply do not have. it took an extra 5 hours.

during the last weekend, i decided to keep the old dog chloe at my house, and my boyfriend came and watched her for the 5 days i was at the other house, because i was worried about moving her. my goal had been to just get her to the sunday when sean was getting back. she was clearly sick and i knew she didn't have long. but i was trying my best to just keep her going til then.

so i'm in the psychological torture zone up north. i had to drive back to my house at one point to help give chloe a bath, because she had intestinal issues and got stuff stuck to her backside, and my boyfriend was freaking out. and when i got back? the puppies. also had intestinal issues. all over the house. it took me 2 hours to clean, with baba obsessively following me the whole time. i have at least 1 breakdown every day. i have to miss a number of rehearsals either because i couldn't leave the dogs and baba alone, or because i was so dead tired i could barely move.

during this time. my mom also texts me. that my grandfather's partner had called and said he was in the hospital. he had a fall i believe? and so if anything happened, even though he lives a state away, i would have to be on call, since i was the only one in the country at that moment. because i guess she wants me to have a heart attack at age 25??

my little brother luke got back on tuesday evening, late. (he flew into an airport in canada and my mom wanted me to go drive the 2.5 hours there, pick him up, and drive back. i told her she must be on crack to think i would do that.) him and his fiancee weren't feeling well, but they took over main dog management. i went home to chloe.

the very next day. my parents and maternal grandma get home. grandma hadn't been feeling well, so she was gonna stay with my parents for a bit. except. the very morning after they got back. she tested positive for covid. and everyone in the house was sick.

my mom calls me asking me to take grandma to the doctor to get paxlovid (which i had taken and it helped me). everyone in the house is sick and they need my help. my oldest brother sean wasn't even back yet, he had an extra like 5 days, so i was still watching his dogs. i didn't even get 1 day after the 2 weeks from hell to rest. my grandma ended up going to the ER and getting put on oxygen. she was there 5 days and wasn't allowed visitors. i had to call around and get her affairs in order for her to stay there. the sick household includes: my mom who is 62, my dad who is 59 and has a genetic condition that gives him a weak heart, my little brother who ALSO has that heart condition and had heart surgery just this year, his fiancee who has autoimmune deficiencies, and my baba, who is t2 diabetic and in her 80s.

so i was stressed, to say the least. and during all THIS, chloe, the old dog, starts taking a turn for the worse. i'm doing everything i can to make her comfortable and keep her around, cleaning up her messes, hand feeding her dinner, whatever i can do. i go out to celebrate a friend's birthday saturday, and it's fun, but the whole time i'm stressed for what i'm gonna come home to. since sean was getting in sunday night. just 24 more hours.

when we got home, she greeted us happily. i got her to eat her dinner, drink water, take her pills, and even gave her belly rubs for a while. she was doing well. we all go to sleep.

and when my boyfriend and i wake up that sunday morning, the day sean was getting back. we found her unresponsive, having passed away in her sleep next to my bed. less than 24 hours before sean would have gotten to see her again.

to say i was devastated would be an understatement. i loved that dog so much. and i worked so hard to get her to the end of the trip. i used all my resources, i did everything i could. and she died in my room the same day my brother came back, before they could see each other. my heart? broken

luckily at this time i had family back, so my dad and luke came to put her in the box and deal with it, cuz i was well and truly at my limit. not a single day of rest in weeks. sean got home that night and the next day, we went up north at my parents house to bury her where we bury all our pets who have passed.

digging the grave was hard and miserable, because the spot we needed had a ton of roots in the way, and it was raining, and sean was limping bc of his bad foot, and everyone had covid, and it was just awful. i ended up doing a lot of work, even though i myself am physically disabled and very weak. my right arm and wrist still hurt real bad, and it's been 3 days since.

that night. THAT NIGHT!!!! THAT WE WERE BURYING HER!!! baba was delirious and coughing. she clearly had caught covid, as we knew she would. and covid really messes with her, especially her already frail mental faculties. she collapsed in the kitchen. so the following morning, my dad took her to the ER (after a lot of fighting from her). she was admitted to the hospital in poor condition. they think she has pneumonia. her bloodsugars have been bad for weeks, because we were waiting on an appointment with her doctor to up her meds. at the hospital they are giving her insulin (which she doesn't usually take?? irresponsible) but they can't get her bloodsugar down. which, when it comes to covid, isn't good. it's known that if you're diabetic, and you're admitted to the hospital with covid, and your bloodsugar is high? it's essentially a death sentence. your chance of mortality increases tenfold.

so i had to miss rehearsal again (this is where that post about my director being a bitch comes in). the director has also been making my life a living hell for this, punishing me for having all this going on. my part is like 7 lines, and yet she still is in my face constantly.

:-) so that's where i'm at!!!! my september has been such a blur of mental and physical distress, i'm surprised i'm still breathing tbh. i have therapy twice a week, and when i emailed my therapist the dog + covid update, he responded "holy shit." we've been trying our best, but he's like "the goal is to stay alive, please just stay alive, don't try to aim any higher." i just. don't have anything else in me, you know? i already was gonna need like a week to recover from the vacation stuff. and now with this. it's just like. how much is a person expected to take, you know? how much can a body hold before it falls apart? i'm hoping soon, god, please soon, i'll be able to rest a bit. but man.

it's been a rough fucking month.

#mine #god bless u if u get to the end of this behemoth #this really is like if i had an actual Blog(tm)#yeah. life has been right miserable. and i don't know how i'm standing it!!!!!#it's bc my friends love me and my boyfriend loves me and I love me too #literally cartoonish levels of agony and tragedy over here #sorry this was so long #but u know #there just. is a lot to get through. if i wanna adequately explain what's going on and why my mental illness has been up to 10 lately

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mammaonii · 8 months

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Did some happen? Are you ok?

Honestly with how bad my depression, anxiety and PTSD have gotten I just don't think social media is a good thing for me. People who I once thought of as friends either blocked me for unknown reasons or have just stopped using social media. The only friends I really have here that are still active and talk with me are @cryptidrocker and @kapitein-oranghien-29 ( go check these guys out btw they supper awesome! ) The fandom I originally can on here for is so damn toxic that I'm getting anxious about just enjoying the game it can from cause I don't want any of them seeing or interacting with me. ( I also don't wanna deal with the death threats and attempted doxxing again. ) I'm scared to interact with the monster lover fandom because if that shit starts there too then Im lost. I wanna get into a bunch of things, write a bunch of stories, draw so much fan art but I just mentally can't take it.

#sorry this was so long #Onii rants #im just so done #so tired #I genuinely don't know what I did or why so many people are upset #monster lover #art #monsterfucker #anon ask

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just-before-dawn · 1 year

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*waves hands like a silly little magician* ~oooooohhh you wanna flesh out that tuggof superhero au so bad woooooooo~

i fucking do AHHHHH

i wanna find time to write this out fully in a full fledged fic but alfkfkfkkd life is hitting me constantly and i know this bitch of an idea is gonna be multichaptered

anyway

so the thing with macavity is that he is a "failed experiment." an experiment with the purpose of someone possessing two large scale superpowers instead of one for the sake and good of humanity. macavity was planned to be a symbol of power and hope. he was chosen due to his immense capabilities and strength, bearing the power of fire. his skills were quickly noticed by the government officials and it was then set that he'd be the top choice to go through something like this. macavity had ambition to be the top in the world, to be the world's best hero who would save all. his father and brothers could not stop him from going on. he needed to be better than everyone and prove that he was. he was going to make his father proud.

however, that experiment went horribly wrong. the main area was for macavity to develop powers involving the mind, but the pain and stress was too unbearable that it ruined him. he was given too much that he couldnt take. he managed to gain the second power of mind control and manipulation, however it was flawed. he could only handle it for so long without losing the strength and energy. the officials called him a "failure", a "disappointment." it ruined macavity's vision of the world and the need for superheroes. superpowered people were nothing but a shitshow and a public image. if you couldn't be enough, then you were nothing more than a monster thrown into a dumpster.

a little years later, a secret group tried to recreate the macavity experiment. with enough research, they discovered a potential candidate, a young tom who was blessed with the gift of controlling light energy. since this was a hidden secret and illegal, the group kidnapped this young tom away from his family and he never saw them again.

the tom was now put through hell, going through the same unbearable pain that macavity went through during those years, except with more added effort. the young tom was educated to be a genius, to have his intelligence become exceptional. this new hidden experiment was deemed successful. this young tom not only had the power to control light energy, but to conjure up items at will, including himself and others. he could do it without fail, no setbacks. he was the perfect being.

however, this experiment being illegal, the group was caught by the government officials. they were arrested on the spot.

the subject? disappeared. he managed to teleport away before he could be discovered.

the tom, now an adult, had nowhere to go. he lived by himself. the stress from the experimentation caused him to forget who he was before he was taken away, only small blurs crossed his memory. he was no one except a cat with the capabilities of two extremely strong powers.

if there was one thing this tom liked to do, he admired the heroes of the jellicle association. the deeds they would do, the cats they would save. they did it for good and for the good of the city. if only they were there when he was underground.

he took an interest to a certain hero. "the rum tum tugger" they called him. a cat of extraordinary strength. he would save queens and toms with such charisma and humor, the tom couldn't help but be intrigued by it. he didn't understand why.

he saw the hero on night patrol, that night, another tomcat with almost similar strength as that hero attacked him. the hero almost lost until the tom decided to step in, saving the hero. the two ended up meeting gazes and the tom could never forget the feeling that overtook his senses. the adrenaline of using his powers for good to save someone, and that someone being someone he had admired for so long. the hero wanted to come near him, but the fear that the tom had of being discovered and taken away again returned and he ran away.

but ever since then, the tom has been there to look out for the hero, that "rum tum tugger," to protect him from faraway. maybe one day he would reveal himself to him and give him information on what he knows.

or something like that idk but kekfkdkd hope you liked it pfft, i'll maybe write something about it one day

#sorry this was so long #tuggoffelees #mr mistoffelees #rum tum tugger #peach drabbles

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astrobei · 1 year

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greetings tumblr user astrobei. i present you with a question i humbly ask you answer posthaste as this is being asked by a crab shaped acquaintance of yours who wants to know.

what is one thing you want in s5 that you haven’t seen anyone else really talk about

AH ! thinking so hard. so deeply. idk about things i haven’t seen anyone talk about bc i do bounce a lot of ideas off of the people i talk to so i lose track of what’s talked about In General vs w my friends but hmm. HMMM. i know people have prob talked about this i just haven’t seen as much lately but smth that is so so personally important to me is a mike and jonathan talk bc !! jonathan was there for so many of mike’s moments regarding will and el in s2-4 and he saw the shed scene and he saw mike with will in s2 and he saw mike get distant and change in s3 and he saw mike with will alone in his room (interruption trope hello) and in the van vs how mike was when he was with el over the last two seasons and like. OH i just need them to talk so bad bc jonathan has literally seen him grow up and i think this fact should be talked about more like. jonathan has known him as long as will has known him! he knows mike! he knows this isn’t like him! so like. idk basically a very long winded way of saying that 1. jonathan byers’ un-amusement w mike wheeler stems from him knowing that this behavior is Not Like Mike and 2. not to byler-ify everything but. he knows. he totally knows. and also 3. even in a non-byler context i just need mike to not be having a great time n i think he’ll be dealing w some guilt and inadequacy etc and i think it would be so great if jonathan talked to him about it. that is all

#thank u mysterious crab shaped acquaintance #squints suspiciously at the screen #sorry this was so long #also people have def talked abt this #but i need them to talk about it MORE #MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!#MOOOOOOOOORE #thank u that is all.#/ask

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finntheehumaneater · 8 months

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An Ego Thing {not a part of the fic just talking about when part three will be out}

WHY THE ACTUAL FUCK DID I WAKE UP TO 99+ NOTIFICATIONS ON THIS STUPID WEBSITE.

okay, so—good morning/afternoon/night, first of all (it’s like 7:20 for me right now)

and I have a very odd update schedule for anything, which is—I post a lot of stuff for it for a few days, and then don’t post for like a week AND I WILL TRY NOT TO DO THAT WITH THE FIC, I PROMISE, BECAUSE I KNOW IT’S ANNOYING BUT I HAVE ADHD PROJECTS AND I DO NOT GET ALONG.

so part three will probably be posted either today, or by Saturday (because I have dnd on Wednesday), and if it’s after Saturday and it’s still not posted, I’ll update you guys to let you know that I haven’t forgotten, or just fucking died. (But it should be posted by then, I just have a shit ton of homework to do each week—apparently more than my not-homeschooled friends, which I think is insane. High school just sucks, man)

and hello to two new mutuals to my blog—

@icegirl346

And

@bpillustrated (I have been pronouncing this Bipillustrated for the longest time, so that’s now just the way I say it, because I can’t read)

the next part might be sad because I’m evil and like messing with people.

my younger sister also told me last night that: “the tumblr babies want the first sentence of part three to be ‘Eddie Smooches Steve lots’ “ so. Yeah. It won’t be, but I won’t tell her that.

PUTTING PEOPLE ON THE TAG LIST HERE SO THAT THEY KNOW (if you want to be added lmk in the comments of part 2):

@strangersteddierthings

@nburkhardt

@paintsplatteredandimperfect

@different-tale-student

Have a good whatever time it is where you are :)

#Words and I hate each other #Titling this like the fic so that hopefully people who liked part one and two will see it and know what’s going on with the update schedule #There probably won’t be two a day anymore because I was bored yesterday and wanted to write because I like seeing the little number pop #To let me know that people liked my posts #It makes me happy and gives me anxiety at the same time #stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #steddie #steddie fanfic #Sorry this was so long #But I’ll be MIA for most of today and tomorrow so I wanted to post all of this stuff now #:)

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spicyspiders · 15 days

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Just question out curiosity ngl

Aside from masterlist what other fandoms are you in / medias you like

A lot😭Scooby Doo (I literally have a tattoo of a monster that was in the show), Avatar and the Legend of Korra (I'm a Korra defender until the day I die), Persona 3, 4, and 5, Horizon Zero Dawn, I watched Saltburn last week and can't stop thinking about it so I guess I could add that to the list, Until Dawn, Borderlands, Overwatch (if anyone plays pls hmu), Supernatural, Control (it's a video game on PlayStation), Merlin, Hockey, Regular Show, Stardew Valley, and I know I've posted some about some of the drivers, but I got really into F1 last year. Also I've been getting back into X-Men and have been reading Cherik fics over the past few days

#sorry this was so long

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honeyedmiller · 16 days

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Going anon because I don’t want you to focus on who sent you this (although I’m sure something I’ll say might give me away <3), but rather, I want you to focus in on your amazing self.

Something I like to do in my daily practice is write down a few things of what made me most happy that day… but for purposes of this, I’d like you to tell me which fic (can be multiple) that you wrote makes you the most happy!

Ignore the notes, ignore the traction — which fic of yours makes you the most happy and warm and all the good feelings, and give an explanation (however long you want) as to why🩶

A lot of times, especially in a world like this where the internet and other’s creativity is so accessible, we forget to give our own selves the credit we deserve. This is my way of sprinkling around that little bit of gratitude.

I hope you have a beautiful day wherever you are.

Endless love🌙

this is a really good question, wow… okay, so there’s a couple of fics that come into mind with this.

the first one i’d have to say is the hills because i sorta went out of my comfort zone writing a “meaner” version of joel, as opposed to the regular fluff i really love to write. i wanted to challenge myself with a fun fic where reader couldn’t stand joel and wouldn’t succumb to his charm just like everyone else. it was also an au i never wrote before (actor!joel) and i just really liked the way things panned out in that. i worked really hard on it and i have to say that’s the one i’m most proud of.

the other one that comes to mind has to be a burning desire, which is another au, but it’s a series i’m working on. i know there’s a lot of fluff at the moment but i want to challenge myself with a little bit of angst in there too, because i’m not the best at writing angst. i just love the characters dynamics, and some scenes are heavily inspired by one of my fav shows (9-1-1). it’s also about reader learning to let someone be there for her (reader uses she/her pronouns) and wants to do things for her, and she’s reluctant at first because she’s so used to being independent and her last relationship never allowed for her to experience a “sit down, i got it” kinda guy like joel is. overall i’m super excited for things to come in this story and i really look forward to challenging myself a little while completing it.

the last one that comes to mind is a dawn’s first light, where i write jackson joel to be a softer version of himself for reader. there’s something so beautiful about someone who’s been hardened by the losses and challenges of the apocalyptic world that’s willing to give love a chance again. i wrote this in a little more poetic sense, and i really loved the way it turned out.

truth be told, i surprise myself with my writing sometimes and i think it’s so neat that any one of us can just create a whole world in our heads and write it out for everyone to enjoy, and challenge ourselves to write a story that means a lot to us.

i really appreciate you and this question! this was so fun. thank you so much for asking, whoever you are 🤍

#anon asks #dev answers #sorry this was so long #this was fun to answer though :’)#self recs

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