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#and i know that's bc i'm an insane person who has to check if every detail that can be publicly found is correct

ughgoaway · 3 months

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my favourite fics and writers

hi, y'all!! so I've decided that this year, I want to be more appreciative of all the amazing content we have on this app, and thank the writers providing it. this was inspired by Lily (lastnightwaskindofablur) who shared how long it took her to write her series, and it made me realise how much time and love are poured into these fics.

so this list is basically everyone im following, and my favourite piece of writing from them! I don't think I've forgotten anyone, but if I have IM SO SORRY!! if I am following you- I'm obsessed with you.

anyway, so sorry for tagging 1000 people but I love and appreciate you all so much!!

(so much rambling below the cut)

@64yrsold; “aches” is amazing and “wintering” is heartbreaking in the best way. Also, all of their one-shots are just amazing, I could read them over and over again!!

@abiiors; is not only one of the nicest people on this app (and maybe the world) but also one of the most talented writers. so so many amazing fics that honestly, don't even get me started on bc I will talk for HOURS. but “haunt//bed” is one fic I can't stop coming back to. And “Three’s a Party” is… mind-numbingly good, it actually made me scream into a pillow when I read it for the first time. Vee also creates all the amazing 75 Tumblr activities so really she is to thank for SO MUCH content on here!! one of the kindest people I know, and I feel so lucky to call her my friend :)))

@yourtouchismidas; “ruins” was one of the first fics that had me checking AO3 every day for updates. truly heartbreaking and all-encompassing. and all the blurbs from it are also amazing. The dad! Matty content mixed with the angst is just so well done.

@shinycollarboneapologist; was the blog where I started rambling and sharing ideas, so she is to thank for all the friends I've made on here!!! The Taylor verse is PHENOMENAL and “illicit affairs” is a fav. but “clandestine” has invaded my brain so much I literally dream about it regularly... so I have to say that's my no.1

@imagine-that-100; I first discovered her series "Drunk” on ao3 and then promptly binged everything on her masterlist (multiple times...) “Chicken Shop Date” is just a masterpiece (she and her co-writer are AMAZING on this and I will ramble about her later), but my personal fav is “truth serum”. I have probably read that fic about 50 times over and I love it just as much every time!!!

@heyidkyay; I first read “Who Can Say No to Bridezilla?” and became obsessed on ao3. but then I found them on Tumblr and was completely sucked into "I guess I'll take this pain, instead of your name" which is quite possibly the best George series on here. so much character building and back story, and overall just a phenomenal fic.

@justlikemebutsixfootthree; has some of the best smut on this app,” The Birthday Party” is probably my most re-read because it is just an absolute masterpiece. but “insane” and “direction” are also both amazing.

@imightgetbetter; was one of the first blogs I discovered on here, and I fell in love with the whole “Love It If We Made It” series. such an amazing development of a relationship and their writing is AMAZING. but my absolute favourites have to be “Bets are off” and “I love dilfs.”

@butyou-callmewhenyourebored; has such good Ross content all around, truly providing for the Ross girlies!!! but the Leeds au blurb 1 is my fav from them!

@drivelikeiido; has some beautiful fluff, and I just love the way they write Matty. but (not so) important decisions just make my heart warm like nothing else!!!

@toomuchracket; my beloved mads!! the fun wine aunt of 1975 Tumblr. I mean I could talk for 17 pages about my love for all of her au's... birthday party is the perfect supportive husband, d-word is the best slutty old man content on this app lol and flatmate is the friends-to-lovers content we all yearn for. asking me to choose my favourite Mads fic is like choosing a favourite child, but right now it has to be totally wrecked. I think that has altered my brain chemistry in an indescribable way… (edit; since writing this she has put out possibly my no.1 fic of all time, “and this is how it starts” so I just had to mention how much I fucking adore it)

@lottiecrabie; I mean... what else is there to even say about Lottie other than she is one of the best writers I have ever read. truly the mother of 1975 Tumblr. “rockstar girlfriend” and “pray for my soul” both have such special places in my heart, but anatomy au locked a new section in my brain fr. that little loser lives in my head rent free!!!

@tillthelandslide; is so so kind and has some amazing series I would recommend to EVERYONE. “insufferable asshole” is one of my absolute favourites, I love a grovelling man what can I say!!! but “Same for You” has me flipping sides every chapter, I still can't choose if I'm team Ross or team Matty.

@lastnightwaskindofablur; what more can I sat about the whole ATPOAIM universe other than it is quite literally phenomenal. the amount of time and effort poured into the Brittany Jackson universe is so clear by how amazing each fic and blurb is. my absolute favourite thought is "Christmas isn't cancelled (just you.)" from the 12 days of Christmas. it is easily one of my favourite fics I've read!!! She is also the whole inspiration behind this list and made me realise how important thanking your favourite writers really is.

@cowboylor; ohmyLORD the smut on this blog is just... wowowoowowowow. actually made me nervous to attempt smut because of how good theirs is. "Cabin Fever" is probably my favourite, I love a good threesome fic.

@alovesreading; the other half of the JAW DROPPING series that is “Chicken Shop Date”. the hours that have been put into that fic are so clear in how well thought out it is. every word feels purposefully placed, and every chapter fucking HITS. A also writes amazing fics for Alex Turner and is slowly making me an Alex girlie just by how good her writing is...

@bookish-strawberry; such such good fics in the "You and Me Till the End Universe". Ambrose has just created such loveable characters and you can't help but adore his writing. “alleyway” pt 1 and 2 are my favourites, I do love some fwb content.

@hypersonic04; her teacher Ross universe is just great, every blurb and fic just radiates the love between the characters that she has created!! but my absolute favourite fic of hers has to be "Tis the damn season", it somehow made me love one of my favourite songs even more.

@cows-wearing-my-sweater; has some amazing one-shots, and his work on “Eternal Summer” is absolutely beautiful. she manages to make you feel the warmth of summer through a screen, and it's fucking beautiful.

@poisonmedaddy13; Ross girlies do I have the blog for YOU. so much good Ross-tent, but my all-time favourite is the “Mirrorball” series. As someone who HEAVILY relates to that song, that fic is just... so so real and amazing. every chapter is just as good as the last, if not better!

@cryley; her “Petichor” series is just fluffy perfection, I have probably read it over 10 times and will 1000% be reading it at least 10 more...

@thefrontofmymind; has so many great matty fics/imagines, “Helping Hand” jumps out easily as my favourite though. Once again, friends with benefits is ALWAYS gonna slap. especially when they confess their feelings at the end!!!! ahhh so good. “Proof Positive” is such a good Ross fic, if you like pregnancy fics I would HIGHLY recommend it.

@uramilf; did the 12 days of Christmas last year, and every day was amazing!!! But £The Record Shop” is my favourite series from her, love and music combined are too perfect for me not to adore.

@3terna15unshin3; Marcey's fic "then because she goes" had me refreshing ao3 DAILY. este is such a well-rounded and beautiful character, her and Matty's love makes me so lovesick it's CRAZY. that whole series is my favourite, and my fav blurb from that universe is Toothbrush. Este and Matty are so beloved by me <333

@because-she-goes; has an amazing universe with Matty and an OC that I adore, Nora is such a lovely character and every fic about them makes me giddy. "black lace" and "Summer Girl" are my favourites of their fics though!

@theseventyfive; has such a way with words, every fic makes me giggle and kick my feet. but if you saw my tags on my reblog of "not so secret Santa" you know how deeply I adore that fic. the writing on it is beautiful and makes you feel warm somehow??? amazing.

@wrongendofurcigarette; George girlies it's your time to shine!!!! "sun-soaked" and "wet" swirl in my mind whenever I see a pic of George looking... particularly good. but recently she has created an actress reader au that I am BUZZING for. that little snippet was... wowowowowowowow

@automaticllamacycle; OLIVE!!!!! once again, such a nice and genuine human being and I am so so lucky to chat with her because she is the best hypeman EVER. and is amazing to bounce ideas off of. just such a kind person and I am blessed to scream to her over DM. her coffee shop AU might be my most-read fic ever. it was my daily routine at one point to wake up, go to AO3 and read that fic. when part 2 came out???? I DIEDDDDDDD. but also all of olives horny thoughts are... MUWAH chefs kiss.

@red---moon; "after party" is another fic I read regularly on ao3, sleepy matty after a party with flirting and then smut??? hellooooo yes please. also, “Souvenir” as a series is just amazing, so so so good.

@maxverstappensflatbrim; “show me yours” is such a beautiful universe, and has SO MANY CHAPTERS for you to become obsessed with. I just love every character in that universe, and Mac’s writing is amazing.

@justanamesstuff; “All I Need” is such an amazing series, and I would recommend it to anyone who loves Dad! Matty content!! But all her blubs are worth reading too!!

@procrastinatinglikeapro; is so so sweet and has some absolutely mind-blowing fics. I must have read her entire masterlist 10 times over at this point. Choosing a favourite is hard, but “Does it matter” as a series has me HOOKED. (but also I love “mango lipgloss” and “wear my name around your neck”… don't make me choose okay)

@mybrokenveins3000; college ross SUPREMACY!!! She is right when she says she is proud of “everyday rockstar” because it's easily my fav!!

@wrestletotheground; has some absolute BANGERS that everyone MUST read. Once again, the ross-tent on this blog is amazing. “Crime and Punishment” is my fav Matty fic from them, and she absolutely killed it with “Settle Down” for Ross!!

@steel-elle; beautiful writing with everything she does, but my favourite has to be “But I stay when it's hard, or it's wrong, or we're making mistakes” (is this also because I love the song New Year's Day?? perhaps…)

@kscheibles; “e la vita” is so stunning I don't even know how to verbalise it. That fic has a portion of my heart FOREVER. But college bf! Matty is truly the man we all deserve, and I am obsessed with him.

@think0fmehigh; molly!!! My love!!! What else is there to say about Molly other than she might be my fav filthy smut writer on this app, and thats a tough competition. Every time I get a snippet in DM’s from her, I feel like one of the luckiest human beings alive. Molly does not have a bad fic (despite her protests im sure) but my top two (because I CANT CHOOSE JUST ONE) have to be “Birthday Girl” and “You Get Me So High.” but honestly if you have the time, bless your life by reading every word she's ever written.

@controlmyfeet; DAD MATTY FIC. thats all I even need to say, it is SO SWEET and it makes me so happy!!!!

@bfiaflbox; sooooo much good content, but my favourites are “Wintering” and “Tonight I Wish I Was Your Girl” !!

@nowshesdoingitallthetime; kirke. This is me BEGGING for more bartender matty!!! “Cocktails, Cowboys and back alleys” is MWUAH MWUAH MWUAH. Bartender Matty is a need, I adored every second of that fic.

@wiintring; I NEED more from Christina!!! Her writing is all wonderful, and “Come here dressed in black now” does live in my mind!!!

@grocerystorelist; “body of Christ” is made for the religious trauma girlies and the fleabag girls. PREIST MATTY DRIVES ME CRAZYYYYY. Leila is so talented, it's crazy.

@forcryingoutlloud; wowwowwowwow the smutty content on this blog… its sooooooo good. “Beg for it” and “greedy” did melt my brain in the absolute best way, like I was genuinely SWEATING at how hot it was. As is everything on her masterlist!!

@hrryshoney; gyno! Matty unlocked a whole new side to me that I had NO IDEA was there. Like… insane. And the newest photographer reader fic also drove me CRAZY because I do love a cocky fictional man and some semi-public sex…

@the1975attheirverybest; Halla’s blog is a great place for discussion, good writing and crazy intelligent analysis of the band. “Education” and “being funny in a foreign language” are just… art. Truly. The character of Amelia and the characterisation of Matty are some of my favourites on this app. Hot smut, good writing and a lovely human being- what else do you need hellooo?? (also the pegging blurb from ages ago… yeah I think about her A LOT.)

@sugar-coat-it; FILTY, AMAZING SMUT. literally, every piece on Belle’s masterlist is worth reading 100 times over. Her newest thigh-riding blurb has been rotting my brain, I can't stop going back to it and reading it. Also, the Kylo Ren fic… mask kink unlocked fr. and the matty helping you deepthroat fic is also incredible. (can I just name everything she's done orrr???)

@cinomn; Nina has some great content, and I would genuinely recommend anything!! My favourite has to be “Summer Nights”, but it's a TOUGH competition tbh!!

@noacfslut; THE WRITING SPEED ON THIS BLOG?? MIND BOGGILING. And not only is Elle speedy, but every fic all absolutely wonderful. “Jealousy jealousy” and “undo” are my favourites, but that might change when I get the chance to read her mechanic au, because from what I've heard, it's also extraordinary.

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favouritefi · 3 months

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I'm here to be bothersome about purror and erebark again. In your web of how the characters connect art, you have Little having a work crush on Jopson. I'm curious what Jopson feels about Little. Sorry if you've already answered this.

not a bother, my au is so convoluted that theres no way anyone but me can keep track of it all LOL. my answer became an insanely long stream of thought so its under the cut (you have been warned):

I’ve said before that jopson was initially hostile towards little and then he calms down and that it’s hard to tell what he thinks about little, part of that is bc jopson is so crozier focussed that all other people become secondary, the other part is bc they have known each other for far longer in this au than they have in canon so jopsons opinion of little has changed over the years as they both changed (for better and for worse). Like, little was there when jopson and crozier had their Big Fight and little visited jopson nearly as much as crozier visited him when jopson was Dying In The Arctic and little makes jopson coffee every morning and offers to do the chores the others don’t want to do when he’s not depression napping around the house and it’s very obvious that little respects jopson a lot / crushes on jopson a little bit and jopson is not stupid so he knows about littles feelings for him but its like. what is jopson meant to do with all of that? Someone once told me they really dislike the crozier and jopson in my au but i think that’s cause I haven’t elaborated enough on jopsons internal conflicts and feelings and history - jopson doesn’t really see himself as a catperson. What I mean is, jopson spent most of his adult life with crozier who treats him like a human, who treats him like he would any other man, and jopson is used to this and used to having this perception of himself as someone worthy of dignity and autonomy and respect. This is not the kind of life that all the other catboys in this household grew up with. Everyone else has been treated by humans like playthings or pets or vermin, only jopson has had the consistent experience of being treated like a Person, not an equal no, but a real Person. And he likes that. He likes crozier. No one else in the world is capable of giving that to jopson besides crozier. Little is lovely and kind and earnest and if jopson thought of himself as a catperson, if he had been adopted by anyone except crozier, then maybe him and little would meet at some soirée where the both of them are bored to death and jopson flirts with little just for fun and little responds with such schoolboy-like fluster that jopson is charmed and they start courting and falling in love and they get paraded around by their owners like a pair of whimsical trinkets and they might even be permitted to take care of / raise their nieces and nephews and so the two of them dont have to work anymore and they are excellent parents and its a wonderful life that jopson is happy with, but that didnt happen. crozier happened to jopson and jopson happened to crozier and this changes both of them irrevocably. sometimes jopson thinks about little and about what-ifs and imagines that he might be content with little, that its not too late to try, but then he checks the time and realizes he needs to start making dinner now if he wants to make that beef and potatoes dish that crozier likes so much. and when little compliments him on the dish he politely smiles and politely ignores little's adoration. so yeah, thats what jopson feels about little.

#purror and erebark #joplittle canon only in this au in the sense that it happens in a dream #sorry joplittle lovers #my jopzier bias triumphs

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kivaember · 12 days

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AC6 College AU? Rusty plays the lacrosse, Raven is either a programmer or an engineer major, Ayre is an AI made by him, and Freud is one of the faculty members.

i've actually thought about a college AU!

Well, technically, a university AU bc I'm from the UK and college is a diff thing entirely to uni. Also I have no idea what American uni culture is like LMAO (idek what lacrosse is, rusty would be good at football or rugby tho) BUT ANYWAYS my idea for it was:

RUSTY: an undergraduate taking the BSc (Hons) in Ecology and Conservation (not sure if it's different outside of UK, but an "honours degree" is more difficult than a standard degree, and is more attractive to employers as a result). He's got an avid interest in ecology and zoology, and has plans to be a conservationist upon graduating.

621: He's actually a professor at the university, but looks so young that most mistake him as a student if they're not in his department. He teaches ethical hacking and cyber security, and has several rumours about him, such as he used to be a notorious hacker who was eventually caught and strongarmed into working for the government in lieu of a prison sentence, and now spends his time teaching the next generation, etc, etc. Is it true? Who knows...

WALTER: He's the university librarian, and everyone is scared of him because he's so stern and always has this aura of intensity, even when just checking a book out for someone. For some reason he's on very good terms with 621... many people theorise on their history, because Walter's also very good with computers... everyone is also aware that Walter and Michigan are a thing bc those guys ain't subtle in the slightest.

FREUD: He teaches sport science and students either love him or hate him. He's like the human personnification of marmite. He's very enthusiastic about health and remaining in peak condition, and he expects his students to give 110% in his classes. He's always butting heads with Snail, who's in the same department as him. People take bets on how long it'll take for them to fight in the parking lot and who would win (Freud has 'is insane' strength but Snail would be powered by sheer rage that has been repressed for x amount of years).

IGUAZU: He works in the on-campus cafe as a barista. He's surly and curt but makes the best damn coffee in the city so no one really complains about it. He seems to know 621 and has some kind of hate-love relationship with him? It's complicated. He yells at 621 every time he walks into the cafe but also knows his order off by heart so it's very hmmm (more fuel for the rumour mills).

MICHIGAN: He teaches War Studies and History, and while he's a pretty demanding professor, most students love his energetic style of teaching. Many assume him to be a red and blue blooded American on account of his bombastic personality, American accent and insisting on being called Michigan - he's actually French and the estranged son of a well-known billionaire. It's Michigan's deepest darkest secret.

AYRE: Every so often 621 will have a guest speaker in his classes who calls in remotely (and voice only) called Ayre. He says she's an "old work colleague" and they're both very vague about what work they were colleagues in, but people enjoy Ayre's guest appearances as she's very friendly - in direct contrast to the very taciturn and almost cold 621.

O'KEEFFE: He works in HR, but most students joke that he's more of an information broker than anything. Though he acts put upon, he's willing to help out students trying to navigate the byzantine beaucracy of university paperwork and how to squeeze out as much as possible from their loans or signposting people to things that can help them. He's easily bribed with coffee and cigarettes, but honestly, he'd help out even without a bribe... very much one of those people who look gruff and unfriendly on the outside, but actually a good person underneath it all.

FLATWELL: He owns a bakery just outside of university grounds that's popular with the students. One of the reasons Rusty chose this univeristy to do his degree: his Uncle lives just outside of it, and was willing to house him, letting Rusty save money for dormitory and food and stuff. Seems to have some ~history~ with O'Keeffe in HR...

UH THOSE ARE THE MAIN CHARACTERS/ROLES and the plot would be Rusty crossing paths with 621 and thinking him very cute (621 would be the type to dress in cardigans and wear glasses), and also a fellow student... is totally unaware that he's a faculty member from an entirely different department. Tl;dr after some flirting and a few dates, Rusty only realises that 621 is a faculty member when he mentions off hand about needing to go back early to mark papers.

Rusty: oh you're... a TA? helping out in your last year? 621: no i teach Rusty: Rusty: wait how old are you-

In this I'm thinking Rusty would be in his mid-twenties, and 621 would be in his late thirties. So, about a 10 year gap between them, give or take a year.

But yeah. Coughs. That's.... that's my university au idea... mmhm. yeah...

#armored core #armored core 6 #all i do at work is think of random aus tbh #if i had access to my computer at work i'd probably write even more fic than i do now...#lies down #sighs #armored core......

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meirimerens · 11 months

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it seems to me that the deal with pathologic 2 english dubbing is entirely dividing all of the characters into three categories: British, South Park character and Women (with intended derogation). honestly drives me insane a bit because with russian well we don't really have that distinct of accents so everyone kinda sounds the same in that manner... and it almost feels less theatrical (maybe it should. but the way english dubbing sounds theatrical To Me is. well. NAWT GOOD) in russian voice over, especially with the kids. (still thinking about british 20 y.o. oxford student that is Notkin and south park caricature voiced by an adult woman that is Khan in english dub. *[metaphorically] holding a cig in between my fingers pensively* still not dealing very well with it emotionally.) the only voice that set me absolutely fucking insane in russian voice over was Eva's – WHY DOES SHE TALK LIKE THAT!! WHAT DID THEY DO TO HER!!!!! misogyny in casual ways etc. etc. but with english dubbing every other character forced a fight or flight response out of me. idk maybe i am a bit biased but with the way it is just so different.... pathologic 2 (RUS) and pathologic 2 (ENG) are like two siblings who are mostly the same but one of them is objectively . uglier than the other. speaking of siblings, it turns out Stamatins have DIFFERENT voice actors in english. this feels like a crime....

i could talk about the voices for Hours bro i played the game russian voices/english subtitles and most of the lp's i watched also went this route except One so i discovered the english voices like second-handedly and Scared Me bro scared me... i've already talked about the kids' voices like I Know. I Know how hard it is to VA kids especially if you have to work with regulations making it harder to hire child VAs (for the better of the kid mind you, i'm not saying #bringbackunregulatedchildlabor here) and i'm sure the women who voice teenage/child boys are doing their absolute bests but man. i think the suspension of disbelief works way more when working with for ex. anime voice acting bc you can See the characters are only vague simulacra of children, but in a game that has pretty detailed 3D models and strives for a certain realism in the faces and whatnot, it is Jarring...

i think the use of British/generally Non-American english accent is like a commin trope to denote a foreignness or a different social status (because most of the anglophone players Will Be americans because. bigger country) but like. come on. look_how_they_massacred_my_boy.mp4... i'm sure there are subtleties within the russian voices that i'm not gettin because. well i'm not russian i guess that helps that would be Complicated to transpose in english but like. worarrgh.

i'm Very Glad both of these games had a release with an english voice acting cast because we like. Know. the tendency that americans have wrt Foreign Media / refusing to interact with things if they are not Dubbed in english even if they are subtitled [i think the whole Parasite movie release put that on the carpet again but i knew of it way before that] so it allowed for More People to check out the games [again. for the better and the worse...]

can we talk about eva and the twins let me talk about eva and the twins. can i talk about eva and the twins?

p2 russian eva has a light and high-pitched voice but it's kinda like. airy and hazy like she's deep in thoughts like she's daydreaming... her english voice sounds like the squeaky voices anglophone VTubers make so sound like cutesy anime girls. she sounding more like a child. and when you pair it with her neotonous face with her fit that looks like a child having dressed themselves and the general "youthening" of her personality. well i ain't saying anything but i'm making the biggest side-eye known to man rn!

p1 russian andrey has a sort of like high almost mighty and haughty attitude, kinda towering, p1 russian peter also has this sort of height with pride to it but fraying on the ends like mouth woolen (the Drink)... p1 english andrey has some of that height and restraint, kinda high in the throat like he's being above... p1 english peter is Squeaky. he's so squeaky. almost sounds giddy from time to time but also. The Drink. my man an arm on the wall drink in the other at a party telling you about shit only his drunk mind can comprehend...

p2 russian andrey has a depth and a certain Mystery but it still looks natural/like he's Deep In Thoughts... p2 russian peter is way #deeper than his p1 counterpart but it still looks natural/that's a Depressed voice if i ever heard one. scraping the floors with it.

p2 english andrey is so raspy it's kinda comical like he playin toughguy and p2 english peter while still Deep is like Theatrical to a goofy extend like IT'S NOT THAT SERIOUS. YOU SLEEP IN A BATHTUB 😭😭

while it. is normal for siblings to have different voices and would make sense for two siblings to have different voices, and as such voice actors... it doesn't for the stamatwins!! are you crazy? you SEPARATE the stamatwins? you make them into two people instead of two sides of a same coin? JAIL!! JAIL FOR THE VOICE ACTORS

#ring ring (answers)#anonymous #artur ivanov while i think making the twins look deep and mysterius is well a departure from their p1 selves. you did a great job. liked it

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icharchivist · 4 months

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so little insanity moment i hope you'll excuse me a sec, related to Mystery Blorbo.

so yesterday i had a Icha Insanity Level 10 Moment where i kinda spiraled down crying and all about Mystery Blorbo literally all day that led me, as one does, to spam my bestie who knows about them 30 messages including at least 3 different homemade memes i've made about them, while i also collected various pictures again of Mystery Blorbo.

And, as a normal person does, i realized i could make a collage of the pictures i had in my files about them and put it on my wall.

so i start selecting which pictures i want to print in a word document (it takes 22 pages, i put multiple pictures by pages tho) and then look for my Blu-Tack (? google translation says it's how you say it the paste that fixes papers on wall) but i can't find it for the life of mine.

so i figure my masterplan has to wait, and ideally, while i go buy some Blu-Tack to a stationary store, i might as well use their printers to print pictures bc my own is bad with colors in general.

except as one does, it obviously haunts me all night, and i wake up uneased thinking i need to at least find the Blu-Tack today. Plus i need to do some restock on meds and grocery shopping anyway.

I prepare myself to go, and since my family just decided to annoy me today, i needed some comfort and i put my little custom made Mystery Blorbo plush in my bag to accompany me, but then i realize it's Sunday, and on top of that, a holiday, so the majority of stores are closed.

I figure my plans have to wait tomorrow. But for some reasons, i'm in full state of unrest. I can't focus on anything i just want to go hunt for it.

So i figure, screw it for the stationary shop, i can find some Blu-Tack on some hyperstore, and a couple of them are still opened today (ironically, not the one closest to my home that i would have gone to otherwise, so i have to look for an unusual store for it). So here starts my quest for it.

I blast my Mystery Blorbo's playlist in my ears (as i always do), and i go out full of Mystery Blorbo's thoughts in the quest of Blu-Tack so i can hang Mystery Blorbo's pictures in my living room.

First store i go to, where the Blu-Tack is next to cooking objects, they ran out of Blu-Tack. Shame.

I decide not to give up though and start going through more stores. 2nd Store i go, where the item is near the bathroom supplies? no luck either.

I think about going to a 3rd store at the opposite of the city, because one of the other bigger store i could go to is usually closed on Sunday. But, while i'm way underway, halfway between the store i disregarded and the store i was going to, i have a slight moment of "but i should check if it's REALLY closed though", and turns my feet around to check that store.

what i didn't consider is that today being a holiday where we usually consume a specific cake -- the store in question was actually opened. to sell emergency cakes.

When i go to this store, i usually go to the floor with food on it, so i never linger on parts of the store with utility objects, which is two floors above. but i know my way to it, and i move up.

And so i move to the Blu-Tack corner. Which is, unlike every place i've been before, in a corner with various hobbies related things surrounding the aisle.

and legit just next to it, there's an item i can't enter into details about --- related to Mystery Blorbo, that has no business being here, that i legit ALMOST BOUGHT ONLINE TWO WEEKS AGO. AND THEN I DIDNT. BECAUSE I THOUGHT HAVING IT DELIVERED HERE WOULD BE A PAIN. and also the one store i found it on wasn't really trustworthy.

literally JUST NEXT to the Blu-Tack. JUST next to it. Like ONE STEP away of distance from it. I could see it from standing in front of the Blu-Tack.

And i'm trying to keep it vague because the less you know about it the better for me (don't try to guess please), but it's not something i expected to find here. Like, it's not from something i'd expect to find easily in stores. And the item in question is also supposed to be pretty niche and only found in very specific stores, but this specific version was not on shelves last time i checked because it wasn't popular even in its niche.

I had a demented plan of making a collage of Mystery Blorbo, then had a nice so full of unrest i remade my whole plan, improvised because today everything is closed and nothing should have been doable, went to stores where i wouldn't have found the item that happened to have ran out of Blu-Tack, thought about going to a store THAT IS USUALLY CLOSED on Sunday and is only opened for the holiday, on an aisle i don't even usually come CLOSE to, to find the fucking Blu-Tack that started my journey, all that while blasting my Mystery Blorbo songs and holding my Mystery Blorbo plush in my bag, and it's at the end of this absolutely insane journey i found an item i've been CONVEYING that i was told wouldn't be found on here because it's too niche to be there, RIGHT. HERE.

Am i insane or is this insane. Like i remind you the whole thing with Mystery Blorbo is that they first started appearing in my dreams out of nowhere, haunting me, giving me legit fever dreams when i didn't buy something about them i found so much so i almost sleptwalk my way into going to buy it 4 TIMES in the same night, that i learnt they've showed up multiple times in the last decade of my life at various moments that made me curious in them but not enough to get into their stuff, that i had actual magazines full of articles that talked about him at my mom's place, hell pretty recently i also found times in my childhood (very early) where i almost got into something adjacent to it (my bestie says it counts because when i recalled the details she was crying laughing at how specific it was), also while i happen to own stuff related to the motif linked to this character from waayy before that, and much more things i can't even start to point out to lest i remove the mystery all together---

And then after another unrestful night thinking about them and making insane plans about them, which i was supposed to postpone but was too unrestful to postpone, i fucking find. This thing. in the most crazy level of circumstances there is.

also another layer is that i've been talking about the item to my bestie and was lamenting how more expensive it was online (esp with delivery fees) than in store, and my bestie, bless her soul, had had plans to find it for me ------- but she couldn't find it anywhere online. (like i tried to dissuade her but she's too sweet)

(small explanation to friend about my reasons for finding it)

(the typos are kept for autenticity as i was in a hurry, on my phone, and also genuinely shaking)

so long story short i'm adding this to the list of "i think Mystery Blorbo is haunting me because this is not normal" that keeps growing every single day. i feel ill.

#ichatalks #please please just don't try to guess what i'm talking about when i'm vague and enjoy the journey with me #im being insane. with u.#Mystery Blorbo #i guess i need to sort it in a tag

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wof-reworked · 10 months

Note

would it be possible to see,or perhaps even make a prototype character sheet for all dungeons,no dragons

Possibly, yes !! I don't have a clean format for you rn (mostly bc I do all of my writing up until my Official First Draft in notebooks), but I'll copy down from my notebook here:

Feedback also super super welcome, please I've been like a mad prophet over here I need to know if what I'm doing is cohesive or just insane/boring

BASIC INFORMATION

------

Name + pronouns:

Tribe:

Age (choose one: hatchling, dragonet, adult, elder, great wyrm):

Breath weapon:

Appearance:

personality:

-----

STATS:

------

for stats: assign one number to each stat: 4, 3, 3, 2, 2, 2, 1 Strength:

Flexibility:

Temperature:

Charm:

Insight:

Camouflage:

Fate:

-----

Next is scale, which is something close to hp (will explain more). Scale is your strength + flexibility + insight + fate + 1 for each age past dragonet.

Scale:

----

SKILLS + TRAITS:

these I have yet to finish, the current list is just tribe specific traits and needs reduxing. Will put them in a separate post:

Just for show, here's my prototype guy I've been using to test combat below the cut !!

BASIC INFORMATION:

Name + pronouns: Savannah (she/they)

Tribe: Mudwing

Age: adult

Breath weapon: Fire

Appearance: golden brown mudwing with a scar across her right eye and 2 talons missing from frostbite

personality: she definitely has one for sure :)

-----

STATS:

------ Strength: 4

Flexibility: 1

Temperature: 2

Charm: 3

Insight: 2

Camouflage: 3

Fate: 2

-----

Scale is your strength + flexibility + insight + fate + age

Scale: 12

----

SKILLS + TRAITS:

Firescales: added resistance to fire attacks: only full successes will deal damage.

Bulky: +2 scale every level up.

Bonded: you and your sibs get +1 to all checks when rolling together, and failures will hit each of you who help.

#all dragons no dungeons #will explain mechanics later I prommy #if this sheet looks barren that's bc it is #I've been on a bit of a hiatus with all dragons no dungeons just bc of work and other responsibilities #I'm still trying to hammer out mechanics so they feel fun and not repetitive

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ye-xiu · 1 year

Note

Hi i think i'm falling in love with HONGJOONG please help me. please. what are some of your favorite videos of him / all of ateez even? 🤲🏻 i am going crazy

kjuhzgtzhujik i am HAPPILY of help anon u have no idea how much this thrills me. tho there are many people who have been fans of ateez much longer, the hongjoong bias is still rare around here so i am happy about everyone joining ranks !!! hello hi !!! have fun !!!

so mandatory viewing of my ateez (hongjoong centric) experience:

deja vu mv (he serves so much raw cunt here it's insane. it changed me as a person like i was a mere casual listener but this one. sealed the deal over a year ago. i have yet to come up for air)

don't stop mv (second most insane moment in the hongjoong-fication of me. he's actually an actor it's crazy he didn't get a baeksang for best music video acting while trying to maintain 20 safety regulations. that category doesn't exist but it Should)

answer mv (this song was the only one to make me cry at my concert and i wasn't even a big fan yet .... song of ALL time tho !!! she is too good)

hongjoong's lemon tree cover (if you are in your mid-20s or older and european you will know this song. if you aren't, open your heart! he also wrote his own verse for it bc he's a bad bitch a virtuous icon)

ateez's wonderland on kingdom (i only watched one other video from kingdom but this is the most famous one anyway. took the house down as the kids would say. no survivors, i fear.)

ateez's it's live session: promise (first video i have ever seen of them perform and one of my fave ateez songs still. every session they did for this is great tho)

say my name comeback stage (kq's block b money was running out. ateez debuted with the most asinine space oddity meets metropol meets matrix group concept meant to span most of their career and releases. no one was tuning in. it was dire. they had one shot. and they delivered like the dorm was flooded and lights were all shut off the day prior. kq has to kiss their feet for this performance alone actually. ALSO. mullet hongjoong <3)

horizon comeback stage (sister release to answer. LIVES were once more on the line. this is to me their best song ever. the choreo is a feat of art and i do not say this lightly. spot some sweet and respective yeosang and yunho actions for the key parts of this song.)

hongjoong's log 1day (all of his vlogs or any ateez vlogs are easy background watching. i am not too deep into variety but whenever groups i like drop short vlogs, they're very fun ways to share non-music stuff in a way they feel comfortable with. also a man who is in such dire need of a dye job <3 he's just like me <3)

ateez wanted special 2022 (for their debut anniversary trip last year. the entire series is hilarious and shows a lot of their variety / on camera personas. hongjoong, seonghwa, and jongho were my faves here)

ateez's logbook #72 (their own behind the scenes series! i usually just watch these randomly when i have to kill time. the one during eternal sunshine promo has lots of hongjoong with mingi and jongho <3)

wanteez home appliance quiz (styled like a 90's/00 quiz show, they are fighting to win home appliances for their parents. the 98z' team chant is the meme sound of a t-rex. it's great)

wanteez friendship test (what it says on the tin!)

ateez @ sunmi's showterview (everyone was roasting mingi left centre and right but it is soooo fun overall. sunmi's showterview is hilarious)

that's it for now! i am terrible at watching mv's and big variety content, i am much more of a listener than a watcher jhgzhujik but with hongjoong i find any of his vlogs / covers / live stages are great content. ateez has also been on weekly idol and naver now usually livestreams hongjoong and yunho's season of idol radio, so these are fun to check out as well <3

#this ask made my whole damn month already hehe #happy watching anon and PLS come back to tell me of your journey !!#ask #anonymous

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starsunfirelight · 4 months

Text

Ok so

I was too scared to post this before, but I think I'm going to do it now:

inspiration to finally post this:

youtube

a channel I watch all the time at the end of the year/when I remember/when it gets recommended to me lol

finally validated my opinions, when I thought I was alone

then someone in the comments mentioned a different channel so I thought i'd check it out:

youtube

and things started making a lot of sense. it's like this one person had the common sense that I could feel was missing from seemingly everyone I interacted with (watch videos) on the internet.

So I watch this:

youtube

after another video, and it's one I'd been meaning to watch a lot sooner, but it's been in my watch later for a long time and I guess it just got buried and I forgot about it lol

I never really check the watch later playlist unless I'm really bored and it's something I remember

(I am 100% a Spooky girl by the way (though for a different- I guess not directly but I have the vibes and those are things that I would do if it wasn't for the fact that I can't for some reason (yes I see the hypocrisy here but trust me on this)) and have been aware of it this whole time and it's also the exact type of person that I really hate and I think the word for it for the general public is "poser") (which is way more accurate to what I am imo)

(but like I get where they're all coming from and hope that they can all move on and get a more happier life where they can commit :> not sure what (face expression in the form of an emoticon/emoji) to put here but oh well )

but anyways, here we go!

(copy and pasted from my notes app) (wrote in the style of a YouTube video (at least at first) bc I am not original or creative but I just wanted to have fun lol) (more like have fun complaining and it was really bothering me and I just had to get it out there somehow) (I legit listened to this song for like 3 days straight until I had memorized all of the lyrics before the song would finally leave my head. :[ ) (again with the face thing, wanted to indicate mildly sad but frustrated not disappointed)

thoughts from today:

(the sentiment is totally taken straight from the comment section of the above videos and her performance with the cake being all messed up on SNL recently)

oliv (sic) is good and bad at the same time, but she’s getting better :)

I got target audience hit so hard like wow

olivia needs to learn to “kill” what she doesn’t like and go all in on being herself, :) it’s already happenin :)

still totally hate her producer by the way, if not specifically for these songs

like Blake put 90's(? idk I forget exactly it's been a while since I went obsessively looking for every single reaction video to her new song to see if anyone out there had the same opinion as me, but more as a way to see what opinon I "should" be having which sounds insane, I know, but I can't/ok couldn't help it and now I realize this is just high school glorified 😔 (ok real last edit so far (haha take that edits later) this was something I only begun to notice starting from Casually Explained's video (found via a hasanabi clip on my recommended who I clicked on bc of QT(he's a podcast host with her and his takes are so bad they're funny but I only know found out (have a better idea of now that I grew up more) they're bad because of other streamers but anyways-) https://youtu.be/MspHbnfEGno?si=KiiMRDYPIc9TK-TF) (here's a link to the original full video: https://youtu.be/l4Ioj4BA6N0?si=gUQ3ZeoyZ3DcGXLy) and then this one https://youtu.be/pII6mLdNawk?si=EWSF_g8Pl0fLOXHG and finally make the connection here myself lol)) but anyways put those drums on the track as a backing and it sounded SO MUCH BETTER than the original

so like yeah she definitely has the spirit, she just needs to talk to the right people, trust and learn from them, and have more people say "no" to her.

like seriously, and then she'll be really good!

like I mean it, her tracks are SO CLOSE to being really good, and I can see the idea behind them, that it makes me a little mad

all it needs is just a little creativity, or at least someone who really knows what they are doing and how to best implement it

like people think the production on the 1989 vault tracks left something to be desired and started making their own mixes, and I think that's what people should do with some of olivia rodrigo's music too! ok but like pretty isn't pretty was pretty much perfect so don't mess with that one lol

and also why I think the live performances sometimes sound so much better than the recorded version lol

y'know what? that could be a solution right there!

If you're bad at mixing, just do it live! Then it's all better anyways lol

haha ok time to let you guys see what I wrote when this song came out lol

like I really didn't want to be "that person" who complained about the thing that every teenager loves right now, but now I see that my complaints were valid because it's just a matter of opinion, and it's not the reason I was so mad lol (ok maybe like 0.01% but like I've been through this before and didn't hate the thing that was popular, maybe I was jealous? idk but still my complaints were mostly not for that reason, let's say lol (was looking for 😥 but couldn't find it lol - me from later, still editing this by only adding comments as I think the original should be preserved as much as possible bc it's interesting to look back at ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) 😓😢😭💀👍🙂🐛✨ (man your recently used emojis really tell you a lot about your personality huh))

ok but anyways

here we go lol

the time is from when it was last edited on the notes app

August 3, 2023 at 18:10

hey guys! So, today we’re going to be talking about 4 time Grammy winning musician Olivia Rodrigo’s latest hit single, vampire. This song reached number #1 on the Billboard hot 100 last week, and that’s almost to be expected of an artist like her. It also took YouTube by storm, (since it was sponsored, in part, haha, though I doubt it wouldn’t have blown up anyways) and I’m pretty sure it’s really popular on TikTok as well. (though I wouldn’t know, because I spend all of my time on YouTube shorts instead, lol) Ok now, personally, I liked her last album Sour, so I was excited to see what new song she came up with next! So, curious to see what it was, I checked it out on the trending page and… suffice to say, I was a little disappointed. I mean, it had such good parts, and musically, it was nice and I could tell what she was trying to do, but I mean, lyrically, I just felt like it could be better. Like, I’ve heard Taylor Swift songs in the past, and even if you don’t like her style, you’ve gotta admit she’s really good at writing lyrics. Not only does she convey her thought with such vivid imagery and a poetic stricture, but the words sound really nice to listen to as well. I’m not an English major, so I can’t go into too much depth there, but I’m sure there’s a lot of videos out there that can explain what I mean here. And as a personal anecdote, my 7th grade class was given her lyrics to Red to analyze for an assignment lol. So I mean, there’s one frame of reference for you guys, haha. But getting back to Vampire, her lyrics on there just don’t feel the same. I know they aren’t supposed to, but in its place they should adopt her own style. But to me, it just feels a bit… idk childish? I know I’m not that much older than her, but still. (Turns out she was 19 when she wrote this, which makes so much sense now, and that’s basically still a kid lol.) Taylor and Demi Lovato have both written great lyrics when they were both around her age. But, Taylor is kind of a lyrical poet, and Demi probably had a lot of help, since I looked on the Genius page and it said the song I want to compare later was cowritten by Nikki Williams, who was 25 at the time. So it’s a bit unfair to compare, but we’ll see.

Musically, I maybe I just don’t get pop opera, but I think the transition from piano to full on pop song is cool, but feels a bit misplaced. Like, it sounds like a good idea in concept, but I don’t know if it translated well. (as maybe she or the producer might have hoped.) But aside from that, maybe it’s just me but I think she liked the bridge-like(? idk just guessing here based off of my own feeling) chorus a bit too much, that she ended up relying on it to make the song great. Don’t get me wrong— musically, it’s a great part, and she should definitely be proud of herself for coming up with it as she did, but do you really have to repeat it 3 times?? I can definitely say that that it’s the key defining highlight of the song, but when you repeat it so much, it sounds tiring and overused. Imo People don’t care if you repeat the chorus a lot, because the chorus is almost meant to be repeated, but I really think that it sounds a bit too same when it’s repeated in this context. The beginning too, now that I mention it. But hey, this part could just be my own personal preference, and that’s valid too, I guess, since it’s just my opinion lol.

And also, I heard someone say that the instrumental at the end left them wanting more, and I agree that it felt like it ended abruptly, and either it should have ended sooner, or maybe padded out a bit more? idk, but the ending just felt abrupt.

But I do have to say, I really liked the bridge part, and the rest of the song after. I just wish the whole song was good! I mean, imo they should have gone harder on the dramatic angle of it all, like maybe have her in black and white with red lipstick at the piano or something. Extend the craziness of her mind, even if she wasn’t? I don’t know haha, I don’t relate to the song, so this again this is probably just a personal preference. (lol Otto)

Especially the “girls your age know better” part was fire!!!! :)

Also, it sounds kind of like her previous songs, but that’s not really anything to worry about imo, because all artists are a bit privy to that, she said that’s what she was going for, in which case she nailed the “same but kinda different” kind of thing, and it’s not a bad thing imo.

But, I guess, now it’s time to look at the ;lyrics. (warning, I think some of it is childish and a bit cringe. if not, just hoping it could be better :(. )

Now, I know that writing good lyrics really doesn’t have to do with age, but more about your own maturity, and your maturity as a writer. I know it’s a bit unfair to compare as I made those comparisons before, but if you look into the lyrics a bit, hopefully you’ll start to see what I mean.

without further ado, here we go…

I ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀᴛɪsғᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ Asᴋɪɴɢ, “Hᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ ɴᴏᴡ?” “Hᴏᴡ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀsᴛʟᴇ ʙᴜɪʟᴛ ᴏғғ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʀᴇᴛᴇɴᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴀʀᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ?” Jᴜsᴛ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ

Ok, so this isn’t too bad, (now after listening about 100 times I like the first 4 lines! :D) but “Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ” sounds a bit playful, if not childish. If she’s taking on a childish tone on purpose because she’s still very “naive” as she mentions later, then I have to commend her for her genius. But also, it might show up unintentionally, as she mentioned that this song just came out of her head one day after a bad experience, so as a child, this might be just how she thinks, and on the spot, this is what she thought of. It makes me kind of miffed, and it’s a bit hard to listen to, but you can’t really blame her at the end of the day. Plus it sounds kind of cool! :D lkokolololol <- me on no sleep

I sᴇᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅɪᴀᴍᴏɴᴅs sᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴡʜᴇɴ I ᴄʟᴏsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴇʏᴇs Sɪx ᴍᴏɴᴛʜs ᴏғ ᴛᴏʀᴛᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴀs sᴏᴍᴇ ғᴏʀʙɪᴅᴅᴇɴ ᴘᴀʀᴀᴅɪsᴇ I ʟᴏᴠᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀᴜʟʏ Yᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛᴛᴀ ʟᴀᴜɢʜ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛᴜᴘɪᴅɪᴛʏ

Yo, can we take some time to take in the scenery? No? Ok, I guess that’s ok, and I’lll be in my own corner doing that I guess, lol :D (also comes up later, but that point it’s slow and I think it’s— you’ll find out later :))

Again, it’s fine, maybe trying a bit too hard, but the one thing that makes me mad is “stupidity”. It sounds so childish compared to the rest of the lyrics there, and I can’t think of a better lyric off of the top of my head, but I just know I wouldn’t use that word there— it gives me the ick, if you know what I mean.

it has real “they ask you how you are, and you just have to say you're fine when you're not really fine, but you just can't get into it, because they would never understand.” vibes lol.

here’s the chorus!! (though it feels like a bridge imo until the last two lines, but maybe that’s just the genre haha)

<3 love it sm omg !!! heart heart heart!!! :)

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

mentions the theme at the end, yay! lol like it wasn’t present before haha

and here comes my theory that the management wanted this part to take off on TikTok all along, because it’s really good (musically imo) but didn’t really put as much attention on the rest? Like girl, I thought we were on the same page about hating songs only made for TikTok! really short, and only having one good part, like you can tell!

Like “If We Ever Broke Up” by Mae Stephens is the perfect _counter_ to this argument, because it got popular on TikTok and every part of that song is catchy and good, and I think the whole song is perfect. But then again, it’s also kind of short, but also I don’t think it needs to be longer, because then it’s overdone.

But maybe the way Vampire was written was just because it was difficult to come up with! Idk, but I think it could really be due to anything, and I can’t say for sure, I know that. But anyways, I think lyrically, it’s a bit weak. and the ending made me want to listen to it more, which is a TikTok move, but also just because the song has some really good parts in it, which is just because the song is nice and not a TikTok move I don’t think haha :)

Honestly, “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs” has kind of the same energy as “For one day, one day / I was really, really, really, really sad” by One Whole Day by Dixie D’Amelio. And she didn’t even write that song!

and so every time I hear that lyric, I get kind of cringe, it’s a bit sad. :( lol

but now I don’t mind after listening to it for like the 100th time lol

Moving on…

“Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ” this line is fine, and it would probably be fine among a sea of other lines that are better, but even still, it would be the weakest out of those lines, but satisfying nonetheless.

This song may be musically satisfying, but lyrically, it’s not. (edit, again, after listening to it about 100 times, I now don’t care about most of it but “dream crusher” still sounds cringe, but the go version probably isn’t.) I may not understand the pain, and I understand that in the middle of writing this song, she was probably thinking about her own emotional pain and not really caring about the lyrics, so I get why it’s like this, and I don’t mind one bit, because that’s her song. And, I mean, She probably wouldn’t have released it of she didn’t like it. haha, unless she was rushed? idk. probably not though!

But still, if you take that aspect away, it’s a bit hard to visualize, appearing weak at times, with a tell not show kind of approach, and at other times it feels like she’s trying too hard, giving the whole song an amateur kind of feel. But Sour wasn’t like this, and I just can’t get why. Like good 4 u had a lot of repetition too, but that was fine, because it felt like that part that was repeated was _meant_ to be repeated, and it was satisfying when it did. You knew what to expect, and it was a little predicable but that was fine. It was nice, even. But this song feels predictable in a kinda bad way, and I don’t really understand why. :(

Ok, back to looking at the lyrics, lol.

“I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ”

These lines are fire, and I like them. :) Not trying too hard, but not too weak either. It’s great :)

“I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ”

These lines make it sound like she still is very much naive, even if she didn’t mean it to sound that way. It’s also very her, especially in the way that she phrased it while singing, so I have to give her credit for that. Maybe this one is just a personal preference, for me lol Like maybe it rings true for her because it was and it’s just something that I’ve never thought about lol :)

Listening back, it sounds more like a facepalm than anything.

More lyrics…

“Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ”

Ok, this part just sounds like she is trying too hard, which just makes me sad :(

Like I get imagery, for imagery’s sake, and like she really wanted to make this work, but still, I believe you’ll find the right balance someday as you mature as an artist and a person! :D I believe in you!!! <3

“Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ”

“Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ”

I like this part, especially the rhythmic feel to it as the song speeds up later. I think the clean version is a bit silly though, and having the not clean version in the second line really delivers the impact. Though that same impact isn’t really felt for me in the first line, and “ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ” had more impact than when she used the bad word I think trying to have an impact (but that could also be just because I don’t know the context of that word, or it just sounds weird coming from a child like her, not really understanding the power that that word holds, but still wants people to take her seriously and think of her as a person who uses that word like “I’m not the kid that you think I am”). Haha, at this point I think she has more impact when she writes from the heart and isn’t trying lol. But that could be totally untrue, but it would be funny lol.

“Aɴᴅ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ɢɪʀʟ I ᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴛᴀʟᴋᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ Tᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ʙᴀᴅ, ʙᴀᴅ ɴᴇᴡs Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ Gᴏᴅ, I ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ I ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ ᴛᴏᴏ Yᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ sᴏ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄɪɴɢ”

This sounds like classic high school drama from one perspective, but like her friends really care about her, from another.

Musically, I wish it was more different than the opening, but I guess changing the beat kind of does that haha. It’s not bad, I guess. :0

“Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜᴏᴜᴛ ғʟɪɴᴄʜɪɴɢ?”

What does this mean? Is this just there for the rhyme?

Like, if you’re only going for rhyme, I found this in the BuzzFeed article I was reading earlier of of curiosity “"Maybe then we could pretend / There's no gravity in the words we write / Maybe you didn't mean it / Maybe "blonde" was the only rhyme."” -Skin by Sabrina Carpenter

which I thought was way better lyrics than most of Olivia Rodrigo’s entire song Vampire. Just looking at the lyrics, and has nothing to do with their personal relationship, as I don’t really know about that.

But then again, maybe I was just too harsh, and this is just a reference to something that I don’t understand. Like I wouldn’t personally think about “flinching” when it comes to lying unless it was under a very specific context, but maybe that’s what Olivia Rodrigo is hinting at here, without explaining the whole story.

“(Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ?)”

Initially I thought Again, trying a bit too hard here, or maybe it didn’t really come across, but I like the idea that they were going for.

But after reanalyzing the line before this, it makes more sense in that context, and also explains why she would be really hurt here. Especially because she repeats the line a lot, maybe meaning that he lied multiple times and really hurt her to make her want to repeat that line that much.

“Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ Cᴀɴ’ᴛ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ Aɴᴅ Gᴏᴅ ᴋɴᴏᴡs I ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡɪʟʟ Wᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴇʀ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ”

This part is nice, “Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ” is kind of a lot to say at once, but I can respect it, it’s kind of like a emotion cake lol. “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ” :) those two last lines remind of her last album, and she does it so well here. :)

The bridge and chorus again sound epic with the increased tension from the instrumental :)

“Yᴏᴜ sᴀɪᴅ, “Iᴛ ᴡᴀs ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ”, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅɴ’ᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʙᴇ ʜᴀʀᴅ? Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ I ᴛʀɪᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴇʟᴘ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏᴜᴛ, ɴᴏᴡ I ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ I ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ”

Now this really feels like her old album, and I really like this part :)

It’s really good, maintains her style lol, and no notes from me here :)

this part emotion makes up for aaall of the lyrics haha :)

or maybe that’s the lyrics? rhythm? idk, I just like this part, haha :)

“Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ” especially goes hard, and she’s finally writing in a way that’s not only really good poetry but sounds good to hear! I’m so glad! But she doesn’t have to do this if she doesn’t have to, I just think it’s cool that she did it here, haha

At first I was like did you really have to repeat the iconic part a third time? or is it the chorus at this point? Or was it all along? (yes) :thinking: emoji, but after a while, it’s not that bad. It rocks! And only listening to the last part of the song is epic!!!!!! :D the leadup, however it was executed, was worth it, haha :)

Overall, this song is not bad, great at times, even, but I just wish it was better because I get frustrated at its potential, especially because it reminds me of other songs that are really great at times like Heart Attack by Demi Lovato, and I really love that song, and it makes me frustrated that this song isn’t that one :(. After the “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ” I’d often go into the chorus from Heart Attack lol :).

But seriously, Like, I get your range is limited, and it’s all about holding in that tension and not letting it go until the line drops (you know the one), but would it kill mainstream music to not hover around the same three notes every time? I’ve noticed it was a problem since Halsey’s “Without Me”, where I really felt that, (editor me from now stepping in to say that I didn't think of this, I just held it in my brain from another youtube video that I had watched years ago but then thought I should "agree" with it without really knowing about what I really thought (based on actually listening to the music) myself lol but then again I did notice it a bit more after I had it pointed out to me, mostly in Halsey - Without Me and Katy Perry - Never Really Over but that last one kinda I had the thought myself a bit at first but then I watched another youtube video and they really pointed to it there as the "death of pop music" but maybe not necessarily with the repeating/range I think idk it was a long time ago and I also liked Paramore - Hard Times a lot at this time but anyways) but maybe it’s just a stylistic choice that I got frustrated by lol, and in general all music isn’t like that. idk about this to say any more.

alright, I think that’s all of my thoughts about this song. ok bye! have a good night/day! :)

Oh wait one more thing. I want to address stan culture, the thing that I wanted to make this video about the most. You see, if you’ve noticed, on the comment section of this song, in most places that I looked, it was hard to find a single comment that was even sightly negative. Now, this could just mean that it’s a good song, but given the complaints I just had that I talked about earlier, it was hard for me to believe that was the case. In fact, that was what kind of started this whole thing, lol. But then, as I looked a bit further on the reviews for the iTunes store, I saw that there were a few people that had the same complaints as I did. There were very few “nope”/“bad song”’s. You don’t like the song? Maybe you’re just not a fan of the genre as a whole, and that’s ok. It’s always (I think) ok to have an opinion. It’s too “copy and paste”? Not original, but still good? Yeah ok, but still, they didn’t comment on whether it was bad or good, and the others admitted it was still good. idk if it’s good to copy and paste or not, but it might e subconscious, and imo who cares (besides the record labels) (as long as you give credit) because it can end up with some really fun music out of it! :) The other comments said it was rushed and it sounded like an amateur. This is something that I kind of talked about in the section before, and if it’s true then I really hope she gets better! :) And a few people were like “meh”, essentially, and still though admitted it was good in some way. So, I guess most of the internet agrees it’s good, just some of us hoping for better.

Now, the really interesting part happened when I looked at another video by a different artist, for just another reason, not really related to this, just kind of happened to see it by chance. It was Taylor Swift’s Anti Hero lyric video, and in the comments, most of them were positive too. But, they were positive in a different way. Both positive, don’t worry :)

Taylor: I love the lyricism, even if you don’t like her you gotta admit it’s good, I relate heavily to this, and just generally pointing out a certain lyric that they like, with some fans just being a fan of the artist. But most people I think were there just () for the song.

Olivia: Kind of the same vibes, but more people liking “omg olivia you’re awesome I can’t believe you did this so proud of you!” which is great but also can lean towards stan behavior (:/), and also “I just love how she sings with emotion”. :) and occasionally “that one line hits really hard.” (hey, I said that too! glad we agree :)) (editor me here to say that I took those comments to heart and formed my own opinion after hearing theirs) But there were also people who were like “I really resonate with this song” “thank you for helping me get through a tough time” and feeling cathartic, which is really nice to see :’)

So, future fans, I advise you to be civil, and maybe not just blindly support your favorite artist because you like them as a person or like their past work. This is just a reminder, just because you like an artist, or even just one song by an artist, doesn’t mean you have to like every sing one of their songs, or go to great lengths to defend them of any wrong lol. You should personally not be responsible for the financial success of your favorite artist. Just tell your friends, but if they’re not into it, leave it alone, chill. If you like it, then you buy the song. If you like it, you listen to the song. that’s really it.

just be happy :)

just be you :)

it’s ok to have an opinion! even if it’s different from people that you love! (unless it’s a super serious important one that’s just mean or something, then hopefully you can try to respect others even if you don’t agree, and try to see other’s pov I hope again unless it’s really bad)

otherwise the world would be boring lol (I mean about having different opinions from one another)

also absolutely no hate to the teens and people that needed this song the most <3 hope you’re ok 😭👍

ohh maybe

(I feel a disconnect with this song) bc teens relate to this song and I’m not a teen anymore. ok, yeah, that explains a lot haha. :0 :)

I’ve always wanted to let the world “let teens be teens”, and give them a lot of love as they grow up, and it looks like it’s finally happening :)))

this song is addictive fs, at least it definitely is/was for me

also it’s funny how she was a fake celeb and now she’s a real internet celeb, and that’s funny lol

I don’t have to like this song, nor do I have to force other people to like it too.

teens like it. let em be.

(ok editor me here, this is the part where I was jotting down random thoughts as I had them, kind of like a notebook lol)

y’know I like this song but I feel like it’s missing something…

I just feel like if she used jazz chords instead of the normal boring generic ones she’s already used before, it could be a much cooler song! Like driver’s license was meant to be generic, and the chords work well there, but this feels like it could use something more!!!!

Oh, ok, I see the Queen inspo now. (editor me, this was in response much later to reading a comment that said so lol, bc I didn't hear it at first lol)

Also explains why everyone likes it, haha xD

it’s like her own style combined with their’s

Like songs

Heart Attack

Some piano ballad - Queen, Taylor Swift

Senorita

Paramore

Avril Lavigne

Gothic/Victorian

Emo - the last two lines of the chorus

Birthday - Katy Perry

ABBA, duh!

Miley Cyrus

BTR (I think, probably just the vibes of the genre)\

Lewis Capaldi

used to ba a sad boy with (idk just lyrics) are jepson era

Without Me - Halsey ^

Pink

Linkin Park

it needs more 💖aesthetic 💓💝💘!!!! ❣️💝❤️‍🩹(couldn’t find the sparkles lol)

Piano Ballad/Queen

(editor me, this is where I pasted the original lyrics and jotted down some of my thoughts there lol, so it's kind of like a "behind the scenes" of the YouTube video lol)

(editor me, but also more of in the notebooks vein where it's what I "cut out" from the video lol to stay on topic/not make it too long winded but here I am writing about it here lol (gosh I really hated part of this song, and I still kinda do, and I'm not going to deny it/hide it anymore because that is what I feel is the right thing to do) (but like not going to bring it up when nobody asked lol, except I guess this could be different lol since _I_ asked and I can post whatever I want as long as I think it's ok and hopefully not being unfair/mean 😥))

(editor me here, also this was me desperately trying to find what this reminded me of, and I was struggling really hard here lol (still am kinda miffed about that, but I chose to accept it and move on after I calmed down caring about this song lol, who knows maybe I'll start looking again by listening to more songs about (I mean in!) that era, haha (*insert indescribable emotion here*) (by me rn at least, :/)))

(editor me from a little later, also went back and saw that I was trying to improve it, so I guess that these were my initial frustrations with the song, or might have been from either before or after or both from when I wrote the whole YouTube video

ok I definitely remember coming back and adding to the list OFTEN as I thought of more, plus I looked up the lyrics in the process of writing the YouTube video, so I guess it was after, after all :) (me being happy I figured it out, NOt being happy about the song >:( ok I'm not that mean (or am I? 🤨 sounds fun actually lol) but didn't want it to be the sad emoticon :( <- ok now I'm a bit sad about the situation, again not the song lol (I don't think? maybe? I mean I suppose since I did say I was a bit sad earlier and I think I still feel that way about the song plus it's a "sad" song so...) (ok stop writing now the sleepiness is really kicking in right about now) )

)

(editor me again, I know you said stop but this is the last one I think, yeah I definitely found the lyrics again and pasted them here _after_ I was done writing my whole video up there, just so I could analyze them in the way that I mentioned before lol)

(still editor me here yeah and I would re paste certain parts and they reminded me of things, as I saw fit) (mmhm yes I am aware I sound like a derange obsessed lunatic and that's because I kind of was) (editor me still, don't worry now I have a love hate kinda thinking towards her lol, and have grown up a bit and try really hard not to be like the fans here, y'know fandom rememberings and what not sheesh the name-shall-npt-be-mentioned fandom is like REally bad and is like this one but like is just BAD on a lot of levels, I think it's worse (than this) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0a4yt5h5rRg like the problem is their behavior, not the content or I'd argue even the fans themselves, necessarily, the problem is when it goes too far 🙁 bit a bit more ^, like 😕 one side for both (the aforementioned side could be either, depends on the mood but both are ok ), slight frown :/)

(editior me, ok this is last now, please, yeah it's just me basically trying my best to improve the song, I think, or at least that's how the latest draft of all this reads to me anyways lol)

(still editor me, like at the time I didn't know if I wanted it this way because it was what I stereotypically "expected to hear", or just because it sounded cool (anyways it was still what _I_ expected to hear/would do, given the opportunity, I was really thinking of what would make me happy here, looking for outside influences on top of that + seeing if they match what I hear/the vibe I'm going for in my head like yes! no, maybe and all that))

Same, bit of Taylor Swift, especially in the chords

but also her own style I guess

Definitely her own style, or I just can’t tell what it’s copying (opera!!! :))

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

Her style, more tension rising buildup in the instrumental, pop ->

This is something but can’t figure out what it is

“(Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ?)”

More emo? idk leading up towards a genre change (makes sense from a theatre perspective) (editor me, I had just heard a comment/maybe it was a (reaction?) video or both say that this was inspired by theatre and was like ohhh, that makes a lot of sense actually)

“Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ Cᴀɴ’ᴛ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ Aɴᴅ Gᴏᴅ ᴋɴᴏᴡs I ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡɪʟʟ Wᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴇʀ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛ��ᴇʀ” -add a sick drum line after this

Victorian/Gothic (imagine the background music and she’s running away) (or else if it’s positive it could pass as emo)

either way this part sounds cool, because of the way she sings it and builds the rising tension

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ -> hit the minor key or the 2nd or the 5th or the 7th or sustained or whatever that chord is, like I said, makes the song cool! I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ -> country? for some reason? :)?

This is classic her style, I would say Taylor Swift but this is her style that’s inspired

“Yᴏᴜ sᴀɪᴅ, “Iᴛ ᴡᴀs ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ”, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅɴ’ᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʙᴇ ʜᴀʀᴅ? Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ <- expect a run here for some reason, but then it’s cool but not her style? I ᴛʀɪᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴇʟᴘ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏᴜᴛ, ɴᴏᴡ I ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ I ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ <- a darker sound? ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ”

Now this is more pop/emo/her style, which is cool because it’s like the final act of the play, ABBA! :)

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs -> piano glissando, elton john, very dramatic Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ -> twist a crystal ball that’s dark blue as the protagonist runs away in fear I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs -> sees shadow As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ -> shadow

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

end on cymbals + and a guitar

hmm “play”…. it sounds theatrical, I guess :)

Someone analyze this further please TT hands /\

https://youtu.be/PdTg-JT8FPM is pretty good :) but not complete, more could be said!!!

>hates song

>proceeds to listen to sing for 3 consecutive days

(now 4)

I appreciate the lyricism, it works wonderfully on the stage :) (red curtains emoji)

haha kool-aid is funny

“Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ”

“I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ”

most of the song is just her being helpless(not really), sad, and most of all confused, but this really proves her innocence, and that she’s a good person, (editor me, clear projection here, if it just wasn't _me_ being naïve, if that wasn't already obvious lol) because maybe they would say the second lines, but they would never say the first line even as a joke if they were not a good person

mean TT

where’s the 2000’s drums at???

what on earth is rocky horror picture show

ok so the final genre is rock

it makes sense now, and is not in fact repetitive

paid(editor me, this was an autocorrect of p!atd though I don't think I saw the autocorrect until now ) vibes apparently -reaction video from a video with two people (editor me, I think it was one where they were old white dudes with a purple background who listened to mainly metal, but I could be wrong on this)

playlist is 2000’s indie (editor me, I was researching olivia's inspiration and she said her playlist was this lol or at least the comments did, lol)

its in minor

all of this could have been summed down to “I don’t like the new drummer”.

the parts that aren’t her sound like Selena Gomez :) Like, they could collaborate and it would be neat :)

I guess I don’t like the vocal technique because even if it wasn’t billie’s style I thought it sounded more mellow? idk

Lorde??? I guess, but don’t really see it much beyond the opening/structure of things (editor me, yeah, this was definitely a reaction to a comment and I see it now haha)

Songs that belong on a playlist

Vampire

Better Than Revenge

good 4 u

paid or something paramore???? idk just what was on the radio

oh, that one similar song, ok

enchanted to meet you

rolling in the deep? idk

mine tv

icona pop “i don’t care”

taylor swift look what you made me do (on spot/hits the spot/pinpoint accuracy)

tove lo

katy perry - teenage dream

needs more guitar

"the song was a tissue of threadbare clichés" -google for threadbare (editor me I think I miiiight have read this on a comment on apple iTunes reviews, because I definitely did not know that word before)

nice lol haha totally not this one amirite :) (ominous smile) (you should be concerned) (about me, not you) (thankfully) haha

ok I made a playlist on spotify ✨nuf said ✨💐🪷

this is tearing my soul away :D (never thought this was possible, so this is cool lol)

—the centrol theme is people sobbing in their songs—

also teenagers being teenagers, or at least music targeted towards them

why hate?

-emo

-billie eilith

-teenagers

-almost sampled but not quite

-the way words are pronounced

-straight up the production

-“cool” = cringe? (to adults? lol haha)

-maybe that last point is really it :)

-“look at me I’m important”

-fire this drummer

-also consider help for the producer

-overused, cliche, generic, boring <— this is it for sure, I think

-not enough out of the ordinary/expected

-make it stop pls

-imo the last part is better bc she has more confidence :)

-Olivia Rodrigo Vampire - Creativity Don't Pay Reaction I agree it’s trying too hard and going nowhere

-also on the fact that it appears that she’s trying to be edgy - “The swearing to me seems forced and unnecessary and trying to be edgy.” also see “I'm ancient so not the demographic it's aimed at.” “ I maintain that it's not particularly inspired songwriting or production in my opinion.”? “ it's an unfair comparison,” also true

no hate

-but she’s got a good spirit :)

#olivia rodrigo #vampire #Youtube

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yellowloid · 10 months

Note

7, 8, 41 and 48 for the fic questions? 🥰

7. Any worldbuilding you’re particularly proud of?

has to be the one i did for my 'satin and lace' series! i just love the backstory of their relationship, love the whole trip to france (amy my beloved <3 the universe hating alex my beloved <3) , love every little moment they spent falling in love in the french countryside as young puppies and then reliving all that once they came back, grown and ready to take the next step... and then the flashbacks to their wedding, and the honeymoon... ugh. i love researching for my fics and i just had so much fun doing it for this series, especially the 'geographic' aspect of their idyllic french summer and then their dream italian honeymoon. ugh i'm just so proud of this whole series and i love it so much </3

8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)?

so many possibilities!! i think i've already said this in the past but i would absolutely LOVE to read/write a fic about the aviation/eycte/miracle aligner trilogy - i think that's pretty self-explanatory in and of itself jshfhsf. it has so much fucking potential and i'd write it myself but it'd be such a huge project and it'd mean so much i'd go insane trying to make it as perfect as possible and unfortunately i don't have time for that djfhshfhs but who knows, maybe one day

also bonus answers: dracula teeth because vampires (duh), sculptures because it'd make a great thriller, the bakery because of wholesome meet-cutes and coming-of-age vibes, the jeweller's hands because mysterious and crazy gay sex aura

41. Link a fic that made you think, “Wow, I want to write like that.”

aaaaaa that's such a difficult question... i think in this fandom we truly don't realise how lucky we are when it comes to fanfics - because trust me, i've read a lot of fics in oh-so-many different fandoms over the years and although i've read a lot of great ones... the moment i joined the milex fandom it was all over jshfdgf a while ago i tried reading something (*smut, but that's only relatively relevant) in another fandom, from an author i used to trust even - and trust me when i say i had to close the tab so fast because it was... meh. it was just not passing the vibe check. it wasn't even *that* bad, it was just... idk. there's a lot of great stuff out there but once you read about milex there's no way out and definitely no way back sjfhdfdxhg

however, in our little tumblr corner we have SO MANY different writers who are just so extremely talented it's honestly crazy. everyone has their own personal - and very identifiable - way of writing about those two silly idiots in love, and everyone writes slightly different versions of them, and all those little details come together to make every fic so special. i could recognise something written by a specific author rathen than another just by looking at their writing style and way of characterising alex and miles, as well as their dynamic with each other. and i think that's so beautiful and special and ugh <3 i really really love this fandom and all the talented people that are part of it. y'all are amazing <3

now to answer the question, there's just so many outstanding fics out there... but if i really had to choose just one, i'd go with 'Miracle Aligner' by WeirdChick333. that fic took me on a journey and literally changed my brain chemistry in the process; it's just so insanely good it blows my mind over and over again even just thinking about it. left me speechless when i first read it and keeps leaving me speechless every time i think back to it. absolute fucking masterpiece.

48. What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it?

'going back to 505' by my lovely bestie @alexturne that i still need to leave a proper comment on bc i'm bad at being the ao3 equivalent of a tumblrina but just know i loved it very much and she always delivers the most wholesome fluffiest fluff xx

thank you so much for the questions, this was really fun 💖

#i'm so lateeeee but between milex happening then glasto then everything else and life getting in the way i only now have some time to>#>sit and answer the fic asks #but anyway yeah always love doing these games eheheh #answered #writing asks

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atherix0 · 2 years

Note

I am in fact here to scream some more. THE MOVING IN! SO CUTE! GRIAN MEETING JELLIE FINALLY - The Book TM oh my god. Scar is feeding it grocery store romance novels you just like. Know he is. Also please know that I just went to check my email because I'm waiting on something and immediately dropped literally everything I was doing to read this.

ALSO YOU SNEAKY, CHEEKY PERSON WITH THE LORE CH 2????????/ First of all how dare you second of all how dare you. It's so CLEVER how it managed to explain why it isn't so simple for Scar to just be turned and for it to fix everything but i am pulling out my hair and gnawing at my arm with very sharp teeth because AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Also Tubbo looking and Grian and being like 'Yeah im gonna ask him for advice' AHHHH YES. YES! MUMSCARIAN GROWS CLOSER WITH EVERY UPDATE! But also poor tubbo trying to figure out what to do bc he wants to be an adult but he doesn't want to be gone and lose his dad im????? hi welcome to weirdly relatable because im in my twenties but my mom is in her seventies and i have Those Kinds Of Thoughts often, the catharsis with that entire conversation was UNMATCHED frankly. Tubbo I love you.

Also the way Grian's brain ticks is just. Magnificent. Bless him. Relatable. 'I found a solution why does no one recognize my genius - oh.'

AND THE DANCING - First of all Doc making a cameo to build a portable jukebox for this specific scenario is so funny to me 'I got it but i dont wanna talk about it i just wanna dance' grian you little bird brain. MUMBOOOOOOOO LEADING THE WAYYYYY. THE TWO OF THEM FULLY AWARE THEYVE GOT IT FOR SCAR AND GRINNING AT EACH OTHER WHILE SCAR IS JUST SAT THERE LIKE "Wow that's nice. Wish I had that. Love my friends" ASDFGHJK Grian just plopping himself into Scar.

Can we talk about how Scar is so oblivious that he only notices how often Mumbo and Grian hold him/touch him/touch his hair if they do it for 'too long' see also mumbo catching him last fic. Scar. S c a r. You literally keep thinking "our coven - their coven." scar you oblivious little elf.

S C R E A M I N G the way they just pass Scar along. PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. *OH MY GOD* listen if they dont get together soon i am going to go insane I am kicking my feet and being dragged to hell 🤣

AHAHA hello again <3 YASSSSS GRIAN MEETS JELLIE <3 Fun fact but in the original draft this was the first time he even found out about Jellie at all but since they went to Aqua Town I changed it to the first time he met her <3 HJFSDJKFHJDJK at least it wasn't 13k+ this time :'3

I AM PHYSICALLY INCAPABLE OF DROPPING IN LITTLE LORE BITS <3 YEAH hjfgdsjkfdgj cuz like THEORETICALLY.... Theoretically it checks out but how would it work with someone who is both Natural and Supernatural what if it actually makes things worse what if- hjgfdjk there's a lot of what-ifs there <3

Tubbo was like "this is a person who Gets Me (see Midnight Strolls and them being chaos gremlins togethers) and cares about my dad I will ask him for advice" hjfsdjkfk YEAH huge mood hfjkfds he wants to branch out and live his life and be an adult but at the same time it's like <3 he's painfully aware and it scares him he doesn't wanna lose time with his dad hjfdskjk I can understand the fear too </3 My stepmom's the closest thing to a mom I have and she's almost seventy now </3 I adore this boi <3

LMAO Grian forgetting to look at the big picture, relatable <3

YESSSSSS THE DANCING <3 HJFVSJHKVFJKS to be FAIR it was more of a callback than anything <3 but also having an inventor friend is pretty convenient when you're about to get in the middle of a nasty conflict right? He wants to DANCE with his MENS in their CLEARING he has his priorities straight they're both so pretty and the night is so nice~ HJFSHJKFSHKJFS Scar just like "aww they're so sweet and pretty I love them so much wish I could join them <3" and they just >:3 gonna give him everything lmao "Wanna dance?" jhgfdjkkfd

HHGHGASHGA YEAH LMAO he's just so comfortable with them now that it only really occurs to him that "hold up it's been a minute what-" kjfdskfdskl this boy someone get him some self-value so "they're into me" isn't the absolute last thing he thinks of <3 yesssss their Coven hhfdjh

HFKSHFJKS if that dance scene doesn't sum up their relationship dynamic I don't know what will LMAO <3 You will be very happy soon I think <3 just gotta go through some pain first <3 :D

#ask #midnight series #hermitshipping #mumscarian

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islandiis · 2 years

Text

Okay lets GOOOO, travel tips and money saving stuff for anyone who wants it!! I'm obsessed with travel I'm so sorry @ how long this is :')

Get the app, Hopper! It's free and it shows you the cheapest and most expensive days to fly, and allows you to track specific destinations and hotel prices - it has an algorithm which predicts price drops etc, too!

AirBnB has ethical issues, so I would research the local opinion on it - some locals really don't mind AirBnBs, some do, so research. But ngl, I use AirBnB in places that the locals don't have much issue with it.

Hostels are much better than hotels in terms of cost and usually have a much better vibe. I love hostels, my fave was in Copenhagen - it was like a little pod hostel, it was IMMENSE (cityhub CPH)!

Get in the mindset of having low standards lmao 2* hotels are your best friend for travelling cheap. My mindset is if it has a bed and running water, it's good enough for me!

Sign up to Jack's Flight Club, a free (with a premium option, but I only have the free one and it's AMAZING) it's an email list that sends you notifications about cancellations at insane discounts!! I love it so much I do plan on paying for the premium one eventually, just... money lmao so later

Skiplagged: this one is a bit sketchy on your part and sort of fucks over the airport staff, so I personally don't use it. Essentially, you book a flight with a layover - so say, Book to Oslo, layover in Amsterdam. You get it cheaper than a direct flight, but you just walk out of the airport at Amsterdam. This is called Skiplagging! You can't take any luggage, only carry-ons, and if the airlines catch onto you doing this you can get barred so like. yknow.

Secretflying: cheap flights and travel deals!

AirWander: This one is super cool and I love it a lot, but you have to be okay with short trips - like one day per city, or something. Basically, you book a flight with long layovers - a day, 12 hours, whatever - and you leave the airport in these layovers. This means you get INSANELY cheap deals bc layovers are 'undesirable' but you get a whole new stop in your itinerary!! I love this one!

SkyScanner is honestly really good for cheap flights. If you're flexible, search everywhere and sort by price - and by 'cheapest month'!

Airports are ridiculously overpriced as I'm sure everyone knows, so bring literally as much as you can to avoid having to spend money in the airport. They are straight up scams (but sometimes it's unavoidable, obviously!)

On that note, use Groupon and other discount apps and schemes for cheap food and such. They're really worth it.

Use the browser extension Honey - it's really really good for money saving, even if not directly for travel!

Check out different departure airports. It might be different for bigger countries but like, for me for example, I usually fly from Dublin rather than Belfast - it involves me taking a 2 hour bus down to Dublin, which is £16 return. But the flights from Belfast are SOOO much more expensive than from Dublin so it's actually way more efficient, so look around!

So in Norway, under 26s get youth tickets - ungdomsbillett? I think other countries may have similar schemes so look up "youth tickets" and the country if it applies!! Research lots!!

Make your own food and bring like sachets of soup, noodles, 'just add water' things in your luggage - especially to countries that are a bit more expensive! This helps a TON, seriously

Tripadvisor is honestly really good for finding recommendations for cheap food, places to go, etc.

don't buy any drinks etc on flights; again, they're such a rip off. Bring as much as you can or buy it in the airport - as much as airports are rip-offs, the plane is even worse!! Stock up before your flight!

Get a set of little reusable plastic travel bottles and fill them yourself with shampoo from home, makeup remover etc. instead of buying small travel-sized versions!

LOYALTY PROGRAMS FOR THE AIRLINES literally sign up to every free one you can - KLM's flying blue, for example. They reward you for the miles you travel with them and you get sweet perks as well, and it's free!! Ngl I do this for every single airline I travel with LOLLL I'm on like 9 loyalty programs

If you drink alcohol, check out the prices of alcohol before you go - if they're expensive, buy it in the duty free at the airport or bring it from home in your luggage. This is again something I super super recommend lmao

Buy yourself plastic freezer bags/ziplock bags and use those to hold your underwear, socks etc. Re-use them again and again - I've been re-using mine for five years LOL it saves space in your bag!

Again to save space in your bag and therefore keep costs down, roll up clothes and put them inside your shoes!

ROLL YOUR CLOTHES. ROLL THEM. Rolling is THE way to pack this is maybe the #1 most important thing it saves you an incredible amount of space. Roll everything.

Use hair elastics to keep shoes together or to keep your things rolled up - best for like thick jumpers etc!

THAT'S ALL I CAN THINK OF FOR RIGHT NOW I will update with more if I think of anything else 👀👀

#out of character.#<3

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idsfantasy · 1 year

Note

hi. okay. oh my god

so i saw your fic wayy earlier in the morning today, i accidentally scrolled past it bc i was searchin for something specific in the mike tag but the name must've stuck with me. i go onto ao3 wayyy later in the night and i see it and im like 'oohh i remember this i should check it out!!'

OH. MY. GOODNESS. GRACIOUS.

this is genuinely such a good fic i have been yelling to each and every one of my friends about it for the past 30 minutes(as one does when he finds a good piece of media online, whether his friends are in the fandom or not) and I CANNOT GET OVER IT!! the way you write is SO fun to read, and i absolutely love taxi!! idk if you've had this oc for a while or if you made em for the fic, (btw, what's taxi's pronouns? for some reason i can't find them anywhere) but either way TAXI IS SO INTERESTING. their family's naming conventions, their possible backstory, and their kinda hilarious fear of zombies is just SO... i don't even know how to put it, i just love em

AND THE WAY YOU WRITE MICHAEL OH DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED. I love how you expanded on his feelings of his father and also OHHH MAN thank you for focusing on the grosser parts of his current state without bringing up maggots n stuff, as someone with a horrid fear of those kinda parasites it was SUCH a relief reading chapter 4 and not having to deal with that kinda nasty!!!

sorry for writing a literal essay in your askbox, and another sorry for kinda getting so.. idk, hyper over it? im just.... wow. genuine props to you this is the first time i've ever been obligated to askbox someone abt their fanfic it was literally jus that good

YO!!!! (Just gonna @lizardsinthegardens since coauthor and all and idk if you sent the same ask to both of us)

Thank you so much! Any time anyone tells us they like the fic we get super excited, so thank you XD

We made Taxi specifically for the fic, but we have been working on everything since February, so it has been a while in that regard lol.

As for pronouns... We have no idea. Taxi has pronouns of some variety, but neither coauthor knows. We could not decide, and at this point we have committed to never referring to Taxi with pronouns, not cuz Taxi doesn't have them, but because we do not know lol. So no worries on not being able to find them, that's intentional XD

I'm glad you like Taxi! Taxi is super fun to write. Literally just a random person who gets dragged into the insanity that is this franchise lol. The planning doc is literally "Taxidermist is the best FNAF character" or something, so glad to know we're on the same page there lol

As for Mike, glad you're liking the direction we're taking with him! And yeah, I know I don't want to deal with maggots, and I don't think Liz wants to deal with maggots, so he gets to deal with Not That lol

No worries about the long ask, or the enthusiasm! I was super excited to see it. Thank you :D

#fnaf #taxidermist fic #five nights at freddy's

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mugenloopdalove · 3 months

Note

you mentioned deleting your account due to getting hate and/or drama, personally i think you should and with the way you respond to some of the anon asks you should probably get outside more, get some sun and vitamin D from it, take a break from the internet and maybe be more mature instead of complaining about something or just sending some goofy copypasta that makes you look five, ur almost 30 man, act like it 💀 💀 be an adult for once instead of some pissbaby bc you dont get your way. Youre so chronically online its insane, do everyone a favor why dont you and just go ahead and delete? You say the community feels like a clique but its really not, you are the problem, not everyone else from what ive seen of your posts

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? I'm just doin' what comes naturally

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? I'm just following my destiny

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? I'm just doin' what comes naturally

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? How bad can I possibly be?

Well, there's a principal of nature (principal of nature)

That almost every creature knows

Called survival of the fittest (survival of the fittest)

And check it this is how it goes

The animal that is has got to scratch and bite and claw and bite and punch

And the animal that doesn't (well the animal that doesn't) winds up

Someone else's lu-lu-lu-lu-unch! (I'm just saying')

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? I'm just doin' what comes naturally

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? I'm just following my destiny

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? I'm just doin' what comes naturally

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? How bad can I possibly be?

Well, there's a principal of business (principal of business)

And everybody knows his sound

He says the people with the money (people with the money)

Makes the money-lovin' world go 'round!

So I bigger in my company, I bigger in my factory, I bigger in my corporate size!

Everybody out there take care if yours and me?

I'll take care of mine, mine, mine, mine, mine! (Shake that bottom line!)

Let me hear you say 'smogulous smoke' (smogulous smoke)

Schloppity schlop (schloppity schlop)

Complain all you want, it's never ever, ever, ever gonna stop

Come on how bad can I possibly be?

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? I'm just building the economy

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? Just look at me pettin' this puppy

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? A portion of proceeds goes to charity!

How ba-a-a-ad can I be? How bad can I possibly be? Let's see!

All the customers are flying!

(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?) All the money's multiplying!

(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?) And the PR people are lying!

(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?) And the lawyers are denying!

(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?) Who cares if a few trees are dying?

(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?) This is oh so gratifying!

How bad? How bad can this possibly be?

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janggtoco · 1 year

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hello <3 sorry i live in asia i think you’re asleep/about to sleep whenever i send asks 😭

how was the cb!! i personally love all the songs on the album. i’m an ass shaker AND depressed so they truly catered to my demographic. my ranking: super - idubilu - fuck my life - fire - dust - april shower (april shower is the only one i’m not CRAZY crazy about really, but i like it still!) what’s your opinion on each song on the album?

being on twitter during this cb is giving me whiplash tbh they’re breaking records and people cheered woohooo then here come [redacted members of a fandom] who are trying to discredit them and saying the vilest most immature shit i’ve seen. i saw one related to bin and i wanted to actually pick a fight but they deleted their account after getting flak. pussy. i’ve been so riled up that i actually started streaming religiously (like i followed the streaming guidelines and all) to drive up views and streams out of spite and sheer pettiness. youtube spotify apple music youtube music YOU NAME IT LMAOOOO they’re truly testing me as a “hag”

and it’s nice to see that you’re going to therapy 🩵 how’s that going for you so far? i hope your therapist is a good fit <3 and know that whenever you feel lonely or that everyone hates you, you have a friend here who will listen n actually likes you (me)!!

have a great week ahead <3 sorry if this was long !

-🐻‍❄️ (can i use that? “hi it’s the same anon from before, the one who likes to check in on you” is getting long 😮‍💨)

lol that's okie! your asks are always a pleasure to wake up to. it's a nice start to my day and makes me smile :3 i hope i do the same for you <3

i love the comeback! personally, this mini is fighting going seventeen for my fave album from them because i enjoy every song to some extent! i cant wait to see the mcountdown performance tbh!! the choreo looks insane and the tiktok challenge is lowkey sadistic 😭 my ranking is idubilu - april shower - fml - dust - super - fire! i really enjoy all of the songs though, fire and super is more of just like.. if i'm running/work out songs for me though lol. idubilu is MY song though. probably my fave song of theirs along with i don't know and good to me like she's THAT girl!!

it's a certain toxic part of a certain fandom that just can't accept the organic growth that svt has... anything svt does is always "well, they wouldn't be this big without [redacted]" or "so funny they think they have global influence like [redacted]".. what's funny is i never cared about streaming but i too started streaming out of spite just bcs they pissed me off so much 😭 they're pretending to be mad over photocards just to discredit the fact the carat fanbase is HUGE and not full of people who will mass buy albums just to throw them away. i may be a hag but at least i have the money to buy albums ! (also sick to hear that they're using bin's name for stupid fanwars. it's really so upsetting to see the lengths kpop stans will go to..)

and therapy is going really well actually 🥺 i really like my therapist and she's been really understanding with everything and opened my eyes on a lot.. it's funny, every week she says "i'm still trying to put the puzzle of you together" because i bring up some new trauma or event every week 😭 but she's so nice and i'll tell her about youtube videos i'm watching and stuff she always gets so excited with me. it's weird going every week but it's definitely needed and it's kind of a nice catch up and to process everything that happened in the past week! and that's so nice anon :((( ngl, your first message came during a really rough and dark day and it was weird just knowing that someone you haven't interacted with cares enough to reach out.. i don't think i properly thanked you but.. thank you :(( your messages help more than i think you even know <3

#also 🐻‍❄️ is all yours :3 #ty for being my friend 🐻‍❄️ <3 #🐻‍❄️ anon #asks

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noctomania · 2 years

Text

EMOTIONAL FUCKING ROLLERCOASTER

Story time below the cut of how i nearly broke:

So. Setting the scene:

I have surgery set for monday 6am. I had this appointment set weeks ago and the time was confirmed a couple of days ago. Today is Friday. This morning at 830am I had a pre-admission testing appointment that I went to.

Cut to 130pm today I get a call from the services coordinator telling me they requested the my history and physical from my PCP's office but hadn't gotten it so the coordinator put the onus on ME to get those faxed to her -- as if i have any better luck with that.

I emailed my PCP and got a response that she was out of the office. So I messaged an NP and thought that would be it. Cut to 4:50pm I check my messages -- the fucking NP told me I had to contact the medical records office to have them faxed! YOU WORK IN THE SAME BUILDING AND YOU HAVE THE CONTACT INFO WHY ARE YOU NOT DOING YOUR JOB?!

I start freaking out, the records office closes at 5pm so I call immediately. I'm put on hold before i can even talk to anyone. I'm on hold for i shit you not an entire hour. The music is forever stuck in my head, practically a low level form of torture. Mocking me with its cheery up beat. I give up certain that they have all left for the day. Still panicking I try and do whatever I can. I call the health services nurse on call and she cant do anything but offer me empathy. I call the ortho's after hours all they can do is redirect my call. I download every recent record that i have access to and email them all to the coordinator who's inbox is now littered with my panicked emails.

I'm screaming i'm crying i'm just saying "i can't believe this is happening" over and over unable to process anything freaking out bc I do not have time for this I do not want to have to reschedule the surgery that has taken literally 3 months to get to and for it to suddenly be in jeopardy the last damn minute it felt unreal.

Cut to about 630 I have a new message. From my PCP. I now regard my PCP to be an angel, a guardian sent from another world, a god. She tells me she checked and it looks as tho her staff did fax over the info, she double checked and sent a second message to confirm and told me she would be around over the weekend and could fax it again.

When i tell you my reaction was unlike anything i've ever experienced. You know in movies how people will drop to their knees crying saying thank you thank you -- well that was literally me. As soon as i finished writing her back to tell her how much of an immortal heaven sent incredible person she is i lost all control i literally sounded and looked insane crying and laughing and just saying thank you into the air for like 10mins straight.

I'm now in so much pain from the stress that put on my body. I'm not allowed to take any acetaminophen for the week leading up to surgery so all I can take is tylenol. I cannot believe i was put through all of that. I can't believe this day. The stress frustration emotions ive been through since 8am i cannot ever find this to be acceptable. But Marla Onishi came to my rescue I am so thankful for her existence. I've never even met this doctor but damn she did right by me when nobody else would. I take back any negative thoughts, if any, i've had about her. All the coordinator had to do was let me know she got the info. Or anyone to tell me! Anyone who reads this please say some good shit into the universe for Marla Onishi. She has spared me so so much and I'm eternally grateful for this moment of grace.

#medical #health care #surgery #thankful #emotional #stress #pain

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