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demonslayedher · 3 days

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If sanmei and kanae had a baby How do you think their kid would act? And how would the other hashira take the news? And how would this change sanemi and shinobu’s character arcs?(assuming kanae still died to douma)

This Ask started so cute and then turned so evil.

Well, let's get into how this all plays out.

If the baby picks up much from their personalities, then when growing up, it probably takes protecting others pretty seriously. How nicely the child goes about doing so probably depends on how desperate of circumstances they were exposed to (though I cannot imagine anyone in charge of caring for the baby would want to let anything happen).

Although I think the other Hashira would be happy for them, natural interest and curiosity about the baby might vary. For instance, Himejima might give Kanae some guilt about not retiring but be resigned to her choices and would probably decline spending time with the baby due to past trauma. Giyuu would probably be intensely curious but because he does not explain his staring (and desire to hold the baby), Sanemi gets protective and keeps the baby away from him. Shinjuro might go off on them about how they brought a child into the world just to orphan it. Uzui probably chides them a bit for being irresponsible but might quietly have the most faith in them to be able to handle it and know what they're doing.

Shinobu would probably go off on Kanae for being irresponsible but of course be the one to take over a lot of care for the baby. The other Butterfly Mansion girls also help. Shinobu might chew Sanemi out for this but begrudingly allow him in to "take responsibility" as he is indeed frustratingly talented at childcare. So with that forming the core of Shinobu and Sanemi's frenemy co-childcare relationship, that means that once Kanae dies, they have to formalize their share of co-parenting. Between the two of them, Sanemi is probably more warm and sweet to the baby (with only the Butterfly Mansion girls around, he could swing being a family man), but Shinobu--who has made up her mind to avenge her sister even if it means dying--might be nice and all, but more resistant to forming a bond. She can't have the child looking at her as another mother figure to lose, after all.

By the time Tanjiro comes around, baby Shinazugawa is probably a happily adjusted small child with free reign of the mansion to go around and stare at all the nursingvwork going on, and once Tanjiro plays with the kid, the kid is probably always beamibg and expecting the Kamaboko boys to play (for good measure, Shinobu might initially keep Nezuko at a distance, but Nezuko is eventually just as much of a playmate).

This would also mean that when Tanjiro follows an an oddly familiar scent one day he walks in on Sanemi having daddy time, and Sanemi would instantly change his demeanor once he's been spotted (baby probably isn't bothered, though).

Shinobu perhaps secretly lets Genya have uncle time too, which brings out Genya's soft side instantly. Shinobu might use her leverage in the baby care relationship to guilt Sanemi into caring more openly for his brother too.

The few occasions when Uzui has seen the child, he makes funny faces that make the kid laugh. Giyuu tried this once and the kid cried.

Himajima still generally avoids interaction with the child but politely inquires how the child is sometimes. Muichiro doesn't care but has had the child on his lap sometimes. Child gets regular visits to Oyakata-sama, like taking a child to see their grandparent. Iguro met Sanemi after Kanae's death so guilty Sanemi for irresponsibility doesn't cross his mind, he merely inquires how the kid is sometimes and takes Sanemi's side if Sanemi ever has complaints about Shinobu's parenting methods. Mitsuri hates being a bother but is always looking for excuses to invite herself over to the Butterfly Mansion to play. The baby met Rengoku once and loved him.

Prior to the final battle, when Shinobu explains the poison plan to Kanao, the baby is napping on her lap. Shinobu admits she has always planned to entrust the child to Kanao and Aoi and the others and wants Kanao to do her best to survive. During the final battle, Sanemi thoughts for his child help push him through, and on the edge of the afterlife, his mother insists he goes back to raise the child who gives her hope for the future.

After all is said and done, Shinazugawa becomes the child's primary caretaker. In a peaceful world, maybe the baby's personality winds up taking after Kanae most after all.

#sanemi x kanae #shinazugawa sanemi #kocho kanae #kochou kanae

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theworldbrewery · 2 days

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Funmaxing: How to Create a Character You'll Like Playing

Part One: Choosing a Role that Fits

I'm about to be a player in a full campaign for the first time in 5 years (I was lucky enough to play in a few oneshots and an 8-session mini-campaign during that time), and for the first time in a long time, I get to really think about being on the player's side of the table!

If you, like me, are about to embark on the journey of creating a D&D character, this one's for you.

If you've played D&D before, you've probably had the problem where you came up with an awesome character concept and started playing, only to realize you picked features that your character wouldn't use, or that didn't work with the way you like to play.

Some DMs may let you change it at some point, but the majority of the time, the only solution to being dissatisfied with the mechanical choices you made is to...retire the character. Make a new one. When you really enjoy roleplaying the character, it can feel like you're between a rock and a hard place: say goodbye to a character you love, or muddle through with mechanics you hate.

(this can happen the other way around as well! I'll be writing about that later)

So how do you get in front of this problem? How do you choose mechanics you actually like that also make sense for your character concept?

The advice below assumes that you have come up with a character that is willing and able to go adventuring.

The first step in designing a character's mechanics is to ask yourself:

What roles do you like playing in D&D, both in and out of combat?

There are many different roles in D&D. Some are pretty well-known: you have the tank, the DPS, the glass cannon, the healer. But you also have the support caster, battlefield manipulation, and more. At the same time, not all of D&D takes place in combat. Depending on the game, there are different ratios of combat:exploration:social interaction. If one of those 'pillars' of play doesn't interest you, that's okay, but there will likely be some elements of all three in every game, and it's helpful to have a character that is capable of interacting with all these pillars.

The lists below are not exhaustive. It's also typical to enjoy more than one role, and to take on more than one role at a time. As you review the lists, think about which roles you would most enjoy playing.

Combat Roles

Tank: soaks up attacks. If you like taking huge amounts of damage or making enemies waste attacks on you that never hit, this is a good role for you.

DPS: for the uninitiated, this stands for 'damage per second'. If you like doling out huge amounts of damage each round, this role is a good fit.

Glass Cannon: like DPS, this role deals out high damage but frequently has limited resources, like spells, and has a low defensive capability. If you like to feel powerful 'at a cost', this is a good role for you.

Healer: this role keeps allies standing and protected against danger with wards and restorative abilities. If you like to feel like a rescuer and pull your party out of bad situations with a clutch move, you may enjoy being a healer.

Support: this role focuses on making your allies stronger and your enemies weaker. If you like setting up your fellow players for extreme power without wanting it for yourself, or get satisfaction out of watching your enemies crumble, this is a good fit.

Battlefield manipulation: this role controls different elements of the encounter by moving allies and enemies around, taking control over enemies, and creating effects that change the physical landscape. If you like thinking tactically about placement on the board, affecting who can go where/do what, and turning enemies to your side, this is a good role for you.

Summoner: this role uses other creatures to fight on your behalf, not just summoned ones. If you like having animal companions, constructs, or summoned creatures take on the fights for or alongside you, you may like the summoner role.

Exploration Roles

The Trap-Wise: this role is on the lookout for unexpected dangers, like ambushes, pitfalls, and cursed treasures. If you like to stay on your toes, monitor what others are doing, and be a front-liner of exploration, this role is a good one for you.

The Looter: this role is looking for Stuff. You might be checking bodies, foraging for the party's dinner, or combing through bookcases for interesting tomes; if that sounds like your kind of fun, you might enjoy the Looter role.

The Puzzle-Solver: this role wants to gather and resolve information about the scenario, whether that's literally solving a puzzle or figuring out the BBEG's secret plans before she can put them into action. If you like thinking about how the scenario works and gathering intel, you might like being a Puzzle-Solver.

The Poker: this role sees something interesting and decides they're going to poke it. If you want to throw caution to the wind and just trigger the pressure plates already, this role could be a good fit.

The Mapper: this role is for figuring out where you are, where you're going, and how you're going to get there. You might be checking for secret rooms and hidden doors, or scouting ahead either on your own or with a familiar or divination ability. If you're always thinking about the next step forward, you could have fun as a Mapper.

The Prepper: this role is getting ready for the next threat. If you want to set up defenses for your camp, heal or empower your allies before you face danger, or divine the future, you might like the Prepper role.

Social Roles

The Friend: this role tries to get on others' good sides. You may deescalate a tense situation, convince an untrusting NPC to let down their guard, or earn the favor of a powerful creature. If you really did come here to make friends, this might be a good role for you.

The Powerhouse: this role uses skills, physical strength, or magical power as leverage. You might magically or physically force a confession, show off your competency to get an adventuring contract, and back up your allies' words with an intimidating presence. If you want to say more by saying less, you might like playing a Powerhouse.

The 'I Know a Guy' Guy: this role relies on interpersonal connections, linking the party to NPCs for resources, information, and new quests. If you like networking and building connections, you might enjoy playing this role.

The Information Broker: this role collects and exchanges information, from gossip to news to clues. If you like plying others for intelligence, you might have fun as an Information Broker.

The Trader: this role speaks the language of barter and coin, assessing others for their material worth and goals. If you like transactional roleplay encounters from haggling to bribery, the Trader could be a good fit.

The Influencer: this role distracts crowds, plants the seeds of gossip or discontent, and directs the favor and ire of the public. If you want to be at the heart of the crowd, you could enjoy the Influencer role.

The Cold Reader: this role assesses others for their motives, intentions, and feelings to gain a social advantage. If you like to understand what's happening at the heart of an NPC, you might like playing a Cold Reader.

Once you've identified the roles you enjoy, think about the group as a whole: will anyone else want these roles? It can be extremely frustrating to choose a glass cannon role, only to discover everyone else is playing glass cannons, too. Party composition doesn't need to matter to play a good game, but when you have the same role as another player, it can be easy to feel like you aren't adding anything new or interesting to the encounters.

Next, think about the game you're about to play: will these roles be useful in this game specifically? Some DMs might leave out the elements necessary for a given role to work, or the specific game you're playing won't give you many opportunities to use a certain role. You can always let the DM know what you want to see, so they can give you situations that play to your interests, but it's also fine to acknowledge that not every role will fit in every game.

Finally, consider your character concept: which roles fit with the character I've come up with? If you know things about your character's personality and background, you can compare them to the roles you're interested in and see where there are points of alignment. You don't need alignment between the combat, exploration, and social role, but some roles fit better together than others, like a DPS combat role being Trap-Wise in exploration and an 'I Know a Guy' Guy in social encounters -- that describes a very typical rogue archetype, and rogue abilities often serve these roles well.

Once you've assessed the roles you like in combat, exploration, and social encounters, you're ready to build your character's mechanics!

A short example: In the upcoming campaign I'm playing in, my character concept is a drow woman from a minor noble family who was disowned for improper behavior. She was previously trained in martial fighting, but has since become a pit fighter to help make ends meet. This character is going to be mostly battlefield manipulation with some tanking, because I love to play with combat tactics and soak up damage. In exploration, I'm not yet sure; I think she'd be a good Poker, but another player really gravitates toward that role, so my backup choice is the Looter. For social encounters, she'll be mostly Influencer, but since she'll be tactical in combat I think she'd also be a Cold Reader when it comes to assessing potential threats and their capabilities.

'part two: choosing your features' can be found here.

#d&d #rpgs #ttrpgs #dungeons and dragons #character creation

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purge-samauwu · 16 hours

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I👏🏾NEED👏🏾MORE👏🏾LAIOS X SENSHI👏🏾CONTENT!!!!

It's not fair😫😫

They'd be so perfect bro. The autism duo who understand each other. Out of everyone who Laios is shipped with he's the only one that has never looked at him like he was subhuman! (I love the cast but they be making my boy feel lonely sometimes) the only thing close to that that Senshi does is give him the fluoride stare but that's just how he is most of the time so it isn't personal. (I'm looking at you chilchuck with your 16,000 stank faces)

And you can't even deny, out of all of the possible combinations, Senshi is the only one with a 0% chance of saying a single ableist thing to Laios. Partly because he knows the struggle but also because he doesn't operate on society's expectation of normalcy. He doesn't feel like how people talk, walk, and/or act should be dictated by the norms other individuals set and thinks it's foolish to think of people as inhuman simply for something like a difference in behavior.

NOW ONTO THE SHIT THAT MAKES THEM ALIKE IN WAYS I EAT FOR BREAKFAST.

Laios as well as senshi confirmed geek over the monsters and the different ways to prepare them. So if Senshi ever wanted to initiate anything romantic-like he'd woo Laios with that good monster food. But realistically if they ever had crushes on each other neither would really know because they themself's wouldn't even really sus it out.

So Chilchuck would be in the room looking at them and with his 75 years of experience(joke) he'd say some shit like: kiss already😑 while lazily and haphazardly sharpening one of his lil daggers. And then once it clicked it would be "mind activation" for both of them. Then they'd start the awkward mating ritual. This of course being painful to look at for Marcille, runs away everytime she even thinks they're going to interact.

Said mating ritual involves: talking about anything that comes to either of their mind with each other until they're throats get so dry they can't physically speak anymore(I got autism and I'm very comfortable with one my friends so this actually happened)

Doing the complete opposite and being able to sit in complete and utter silence while still looking like they're communicating (they on that telepathy shit)

Understanding immediately when one or the other isn't up for something or if they don't feel like talking to the others but don't know how to voice it.

Imagine other people in the dungeon look at the two and think they're acquaintances because of how nonchalant they talk to each other only for one of them to do some the most romantic shit out of nowhere then go back to being chill.

The looks of bewilderment would be insane.

(Genuinely I don't think I'm that good of voicing my opinion of characters and ships so if you can help me reword parts that feel weird to you feel free to comment because I wrote this while having a random spark of inspiration at the dead of night.)

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savagewildnerness · 1 day

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Lestat and Louis at the start of TTOTBT

Ok, I’m reading Chapter 7 of The Tale of the Body Thief & would love to hear everyone’s thoughts, because to me it is like - why is Lestat really going to see Louis here? Is he going in some way to say goodbye? Is he going to Louis really to in some subconscious way, beg him to give him reason to keep on existing? Does he really think Louis will approve of his (bonkers!) mission!!?! Of course he won't!

Just before he arrives, Lestat talks of how Louis lives in ramshackle conditions & he feels like Louis on some level would love Lestat to pull him out of it all and into the luxury Lestat loves... and how Louis seems to love this luxury when he visits Lestat. Is this all a way of reflecting something Lestat is feeling himself on some level?…

Then, Louis is horrified to see Lestat's appearance and to realise that Lestat tried to kill himself, but Lestat brushes it off as if it were nothing and as if he truly didn't believe he could die and to be suicidal is nothing at all. He minimises it (as he also does for us readers) & tells Louis about his plan with the body thief, as if Louis will be excited.

Louis admonishes him & tells him he’ll kill Raglan James if he sees him. Lestat makes a jibe about the time Louis saw him in New Orleans post-Paris being untrue - alluding to the other time Louis experienced Lestat essentially suicidal, and indeed in way more ramshackle conditions than Louis now lives in… and they have spat about lies and truth and at the end of it Lestat says of Louis:

“He seemed tormented in some deep way, as if my words had caused him pain.”

Well they had, Lestat! Lestat talks of lying to himself before this moment in TTOTBT & personally I absolutely think he’s doing it here. After all, he just tried to kill himself. That did happen. Now he wants to become mortal via an interaction with a human he himself doesn’t like & sees is immoral and untrustworthy and has bad vibes. Why is it Lestat is *excited*? Well, as a mortal, he can still die! He’s still dreaming of his mortal life in Paris just as he was before he went into the Gobi Desert! He is still seeing Claudia, as he was then. His mindset is really no better than it was before that suicide attempt. In fact, it is worse, because now he knows he cannot kill himself by going into the sun! That has to cause a deeper crisis!

Why doesn’t Lestat care what will haven to his powerful immortal body & what havoc could be wreaked? Because on some level, he thinks he will (or at least is drawn to the idea that he could) die.

Lestat: “My suspicion is that we know a great deal of each other’s feelings and longings; only the amplification is too loud for any distinct image to come clear.” (Re: fledglings & makers not being able to communicate.) Why YES Lestat! Louis sees you as you avoid seeing your self!!!! 😭

“I found him still at his desk, looking at me in the most forlorn, almost heartbroken way.”

Louis sees you, Lestat!!!!!

Lestat on Louis: He grew reflective again and very sad….*snip*

“I love you,” he said softly. (Louis to Lestat)

And... (still Louis to Lestat when Lestat bemoans everyone telling him to stop being stupid...)

“Well, of course, you pick the voices that scold you. You always have, in the same manner in which you pick those who willl turn on you and stick the knife right into your heart.”

And all this time, Lestat wanders New Orleans observing the beauty and the charges over time. Reminiscing, looking at the stars, at the weeds, at the water and bridges, at the houses. Trying to conceive of New Orleans’ future. He sits in churches & contemplates existence and God and... is he truly in an excited headspace, merely wanting to be mortal 'as any vampire desires'? Obviously not.

I sense Lestat’s underlying despair still there: a deep chasm. And what does Lestat do when in despair. Well, he doesn’t dwell in it like Louis - he tries his very best to ignore it if he can. He'll ignore it and ignore it and ignore it until it absolutely almost destroys him. He does it over and over again. But for now: if he can find the most extravagant distraction or scheme then it’s a YES PLEASE from Lestat!!!...

“Something dreadful’s going to happen to you again. You’re going to see to it. I know.” (Louis, to Lestat)

There's just so much sadness in this chapter and it is so long since I read it, I had forgotten the depths of it and I just love how you can feel it without it all being put into words. Of course, as this isn't all in words, I do wonder if everyone feels it the same way I do?

Do you?

#interview with the vampire #anne rice #the tale of the body thief #lestat #lestat de lioncourt #the vampire lestat #louis de pointe du lac #loustat #raglan james #lestat x louis #vampire chronicles

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lemongogo · 5 months

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can i ask.how u guys practice ur creativity <3 how u practice ur imagination or like.. how u experiment with ur art, how u come to ideas and how u develop them.<3 pretty please <3

#smthing i have always struggled w.is feeling like i can only draw things that r handed 2 me.#as in.an idea or concept that already exists #chara or conflict that already exists.Scene that alr exists.#and i think it can be soo limiting bc when i have that sort of creative desire but nothing 2 reflect off of it #i feel like im unable to do anything/get anywhere bc im unable to do that mental legwork myself ykwim #like comic artists r SOOO JAW DROP INSPIRING TO MEE bc not only are u envisioning ur own sequences/situations #but u are able to imagine even the most MUNDANE interactions within those scenarios u know #like the transitory panels and the quiet moments and the every day stillness #and i feel like.its not even a poor attempt on my behalf its like.i cant Even attempt it.like my brain is soo empty #and soo static and noiseless that i am like gauhh......#i can practice lines all day long and practice colors and practice anatomy or Whatever bc its something concrete #and its in front of me and i can pry apart the physical technicalities until i understand it better #but my MIND???ABSTRACTION>? THOUGHTS .ough its so hard #and i really want to push past that but i dont know how and its so .. demoralizing to think that ill get there One Day but i feel #one million and two days away.and not making active process towards it.#i know the first step is to build ur visual library and i feel liek. idk i FEEL LIKEEE theres more 2 it that im missing #but also im depressed as hell n my job is killing my creative drive and the seasonal stuff isnt helping #so maybe i just need 2 give it time (true) but i also like.man i dont know. i want 2 do something w my hands #but everything ive been doing so far has felt soo .hard and fruitless and i definitely dont want 2 turn art into such a stressful thing #fruitless as in like.i dont get any personal satisfaction w it.idgaf abt monetization or algorithms or any of tht #but smtimes thats just what happens and i have 2 weather through and know ill be more equipped 4 this some other time #SAWRYYY IM ALWAYS GOING ON AND ONNN im nromal im normal<3 i just rly like art and it sucks balls whn it feels out of reach #sigh cry fart scroll.(:salute:)

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kindnessoverperfection · 1 year

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I've found that, when interacting with others (or myself), it's useful to consider the lessons I'd want to teach a growing child.

If a child makes a mistake, I wouldn't want them to feel shame. I wouldn't yell at them, humiliate them, or in any way indicate to them that their mistake is a reflection of their worth or of who they are as a person.

Instead, I'd want them to associate the process with love and joy. If they say something that hurts someone's feelings, or otherwise ostracizes someone in some way, I'd compassionately explain to them. Ideally, they'd walk away knowing why they said / did it in the first place, how to handle similar situations in the future, and would accept the consequences (e.g. if a friend no longer wanted to hang out with them).

While the consequences may sometimes be painful, I'd do my best to instill in them that mistakes are human and natural, and that the process of learning from these mistakes is an opportunity to improve connections with others and express love.

I have a tendency towards excessive guilt. Memories in which I've said / done something ignorant or hurtful are infused with this guilt and shame- but ideally, I'd feel a sense of love and peace, and perhaps happiness, when looking back on them. Because they were moments of growth, moments I learned how to be more compassionate (even if the actual learning came years later).

So I'll put this out into the void:

When you make a mistake, that is not a reflection of you as a person. It is a moment in time, a moment which was informed by your past experiences. Humans are not static labels, or monsters in an RPG game. We are social creatures who live and learn and react and grow and experience and love. Be gentle with yourself and move forward knowing you're doing so in accordance with your values.

#parenting #internet culture #self compassion #i'd also want to teach them critical thought of course - there are varying ideas of what constitutes mistakes or ignorance or harm #and that's a messy subject which is often a challenge to teach and is beyond the scope of this post but it's important #to avoid being subject to manipulation or becoming reactionary #but anyways #to clarify something in the tags here: it's okay of course to feel bad. that's a normal response. but it's not necessary. and a culture of #shaming people for their mistakes isn't helpful in the same ways it isn't helpful to do that to a child. people become defensive and/or #self-hating. divisive and reactionary and more easily manipulated. fearful and ashamed and avoidant. afraid of disagreements or of trying #anything new. increased all-or-nothing thinking and blowing things out of proportion. it just doesn't help in the long run #sometimes when someone says something i want to express hatred and mockery towards; i think of my trans friend who's full of light and love #and compassion. who came from a smaller more conservative community and used to have some of those same stances (and may still hold some of #those feelings/anxieties). and i remember that i can be firm on my boundaries and spread love and acceptance and safety *without* spewing #vitriol at anyone who makes even a minor mistake. i want people who were impacted by oppression and bias to have space to grow and #find safe communities and be able to think for themselves. i dont want to push them away or be another person in their life screaming at #them. there's always a person behind the screen.#like that doesnt mean i have to interact with them. in fact in most cases it's better to step away. and there are still unsafe people out #there- but yelling at them won't do any good either. saw a tip to focus on the people you want to help rather than the opposition #and that's been super helpful for me

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orcelito · 5 months

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Also remembering that I get to write wolfwood next chapter and I'm a widdle nervous bc this is a Big Moment and I only wrote him a little bit with Sentido and it's been 8 months since then

But im also REALLY excited bc I get to finally (FINALLY) start executing the vashwood concepts I'd thought up at the damned START of this fic

So much relationship development to get to. So much Wolfwood to get to. Very exciting things.

#speculation nation #itnl shit #ive got a pretty solid grasp on wolfwood I Think but also #i think i wanna do some more research into him before i write hin #im gonna need to read more of the manga Anyways.#i need to study his mannerisms and speech patterns and the ways he interacts with the world #because i have a good idea of it already but a lot of my concept of him does exist in fanon #because it's been A Bit since ive actually read the manga.#and i never want to base my writing off of fanon. never ever ever. that's fatal writing error number One.#i pride myself on my rock solid characterizations. for side characters it doesnt matter as much #but the 2nd person in the main pairing? ostensibly the 2nd most important character to the fic?#yeah im not gonna fuckin base him off of what i have in my mind from however much fanfiction.#it's like the difference between accuracy and precision. by following fanon characterizations #someone might be able to be Precise about his characterization. in that they write him consistently and according to common perception.#but fanon very often exists Just to the left of what canon actually is. so it may be precise but not accurate #at least with regard to canon characterizations.#i want my characterization to be both precise And accurate. i want people to read my fic and go 'yeah thats trimax wolfwood'#with vash i do sprinkle in a few of my favorite things from the other versions too. same with the girls.#and maybe i'll do that a bit with wolfwood. but also hes so very different between the 3 iterations #that he might as well be different characters in all of them.#this is first and foremost a trimax fic. so i WILL have trimax wolfwood in it.#i may look up general guides for writing him if theyre around. but tbh i will rely more on my own research probably.#i have my own system for writing anyways. the sliding scales of different qualities that guides my general word choices for dialog #ive explained it before. dont really wanna get into it again.#i need to solidify in my mind where ww exists on the axes of intelligence politeness kindness and formality #among others. while also paying attention for any kind of repeat words or phrases that he likes to use #that i can pepper in to make it Sound Like Him.#thats the key to how i do general dialog lol. it's of course guided by who they are as a person #but word choice is done through the general perception of them along a set of axes. this is how it goes for All my writing.#im. rambling. whoops. anyways im excited for wolfwood. Soon...

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fiendishartist2 · 1 month

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guys what if i want to make my own apollo justice game.

#i need to write a prequel to aa4 pls pls pls pls pls #okay get this: so phoenix isnt disbarred yet and he doesnt have trucy. hes still taking and winning cases #one day he gets a call from edgeworth and hes all like ''wright i need your assistance'' and hes like what for and edgeworth goes #''ive been given the most ridiculous case and i think youre the only man in law who can take care of it''#so phoenix bikes his ass to the detention center and boom. child behind bars #and phoenix is like ??? hey kid what are doing here. and this kid is the most surly mfer on the planet like you couldnt get-#-a word out of him if you tried. hes kinda giving phoenix the stink eye too but hes just the littlest guy on earth #and phoenix feels bad for him so he tries to get a rundown of the case (maybe edgeworth gave him an autopsy report or smth beforehand)#but get this. the kid still wont speak. he hasnt even moved a muscle. and after some prodding you find out this little dude-#-doesnt speak english (i dont love aa6 but i think apollos tragic backstory can be interesting so we're going w that but taking it seriousl #anyways so maya is like omg this kid is speaking khurainese but hers is kinda broken bc shes not from the mainland and only knows it-#-from like prayers #so you only get bits and pieces of the kids testimony. plus he still doesnt wanna talk bc ''dhurk told me not to talk to you''#so you start following the new lead but you ask too many questions and apollos like oh shit i said too much and wont talk to you anymore #but now you have two leads: khur'ain and a man named ''dhurk'' plus the fact that this is kid might be new to america since-#-he cant speak english but is smack dab in the middle of california. its all v curious and phoenix wants to get to the bottom of it #for the rest of the case i feel like it would go in the direction of ''we dont know exactly whats up w this dhurk guy or where this kid-#-came from but we do get him acquitted and phoenix is able to save him from the dark path he was heading towards'' thus steering apollo-#-in the direction of law and giving him a wayyyy better reason than aa6 gave him <3 #i kind of like the interlinked nature of ace attorney's storytelling. like everything leads into smth else and everyone is impacted-#-by another person before they even become properly entangled w each other's lives #like how mia faced dahlia years before she met phoenix but dahlia was the one to connect them #or how trucy gave phoenix the diary paper but she's also the one who ropes apollo into the waa. even before they know they're siblings #or how lamoire left apollo and trucy as children and when they reunite as adults they cant recognise each other but they all find each-#-other anyways #i could go on but i think this could be cool yknow esp bc i think the most interesting thing about apollo's aa6 backstory is his life-#-post dhurk. like where did he stay? was he a foster kid? was he put into the system? how did that affect him? what kind of ppl took him in #i just wanna know how that whole thing would have effected him bc like when yiu think about it how did he even get to america?? his dad's #-considered a terrorist. idk man i think its interesting and apollo and dhurks interactions are one of the only good parts of aa6

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neverendingford · 3 months

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#tag talk #anytime my friends point out that something I say is good advice or express that they see me as aspirational I'm always just like....#wtf how am I am example to look up to I'm just an idiot bumbling his way through life trying to avoid hitting her head on cabinet corners #honestly it's mostly just seeing mistakes others have made and going “I will not make those mistakes. I will make weirder mistakes than that #like. it feels a little like the “I'm eighty years old I'm done with putting up with everyone's bullshit” except it's #it's “I didn't kill myself so I'm not gonna put up with bullshit anymore”#like. I chose life. I'm not about to half-ass that decision. I'm not gonna walk back that decision. I'm not going to flinch away from it.#that fuckin... “what do we have to fear but fear itself” quote or whatever. like.. I died. you think anything else is gonna scare me?#if I'm going to be stuck here on this planet you bet your ass I'm gonna make the most of it. I'm not gonna be embarrassed. no shame.#we're all living here until we die and the things that matter are your own life and then the people around you.#I'm not going to miss out on a chance to find community and connection just because I'm afraid. I'm done being afraid.#though... I have been feeling shrimp emotions for the past two weeks and my stomach has tied itself up in knots over it.#I'm so detached because I'm afraid of feeling my emotions too strongly. so letting go and experiencing emotions is a lot for me.#and agghfffgghh I'm going to make it through this I'm going to make it through this but damn it's really rough #allowing yourself to get close to someone again after solidifying your position as unassailable is so hard.#especially because I've gotten so used to shielding the emotions of other people. hard to be honest when your honesty will hurt them #it's wild being around someone who's not wildly insecure because I can be genuine and honest and not worry about what I say hurting her.#I could say “I'm leaving in a year do you still want to date?” and trust that she would actually think it through and give a reliable answer #like. I can handle just my emotions because she's able to handle hers.#being in mental health spaces for so long I'm not used to interacting with emotionally stable people lmaooo #do you think I'm emotionally stable? I don't think I am. but then I meet other people who are wildly more unstable than I am and hmmm #like. sui wasn't an emotional choice it was a cost benefit analysis. I get emotionally unstable sure. but I contain myself until it's over.#I know enough to not be impulsive because I recognize impulsive behavior in others and thus in myself as well.#so like. I'm unstable but I'm not externally unstable. I know how to isolate when I'm in a wounded lashing out state.#anyway I've been processing so many emotions this past week because I'm wildly out of practice with allowing myself emotional honesty #instead of just bricking myself up behind my defensive apathy. I want to hold onto this. I want to continue to channel these emotions.#I want to be unafraid to tell people when I love them #though with her it's more of a Nerevarine situation. you are not someone I love but rather someone who might become that.#like. I haven't known her long enough to really say I love. but I very much think if things continue how they are I will be confident in it #and not even romantic love per se. I have some old friends who I genuinely love. several siblings who I love. most people I know I do not.

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kite33 · 5 months

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kind of miss the old days

#like being able to talk about your weird niche interests with your buddies #theorycrafting and trying to guess what's going to happen next or what x or y meant in the most recent update/chapter or whatever #deltarune has a LOT of this kind of stuff #but honestly i'm simply too scared to insert myself into these established groups anymore #like fan discords and such (not twitter jesus god not fucking twitter)#closest i see these days in my friend circles are mega and wakn talking about one piece but that's literally it #and it's not really something i can interact with #i think part of the reason i was so into homestuck (another example of something that has this) is because i had friends who were into it #and they had friends who also had friends etc #so i always had someone to talk to about it #but these days it feels like i have all these things i want to talk about but nobody to actually talk to #so it feels pointless #and on the rare occasions i do say anything it's nearly always ignored #and it's unfair to expect anyone to play along when they don't know or care about whatever it is my brain has latched onto #just frustrating to not have an outlet #just been on my mind lately

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katya-goncharov · 7 months

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honestly it's just really fucking unfair that i don't get to have friends or connect with people or even have normal aquaintances and i always feel awkward and like everyone is put off by me and everything that involves social interaction is 100 times more difficult for me than it is for anyone else

#i remember when i was a kid friendship was the thing i considered the MOST important thing in the world #and so it's ironic that i only really have one friend now and i haven't really been able to make any friends since i was about 12 and peopl #including my own parents seem to think i don't even WANT friends which is so so far from the truth #and i hate that when i interact with people they never speak to me like a normal person. i'm always Weird. even if it's a small thing like #them putting on a slightly more patronising voice for me than other people. i never feel quite like an equal and some of it is maybe just #in my head but i don't know how much and it definitely isn't all of it #it just sucks and i miss when i was a kid and i didn't know i was neurodivergent and it didn't matter because i wasn't expected to be #bad at social interaction because all kids are so i didn't stand out. honestly sometimes i wonder whether it's that i changed or just that #everyone else grew up and started seeing me different because i didn't grow up quite the right way #anyway ignore me i'm just trying to process my feelings a bit and it helps getting it off my chest on here #emma vents

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byanyan · 7 months

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main verse updates, developments, & additional headcanons

ㅤthanks to lena practically dragging them into it, byan is on the track team that she coaches at school. though they initially weren't all that interested, it's something they've come to enjoy a lot (even if they sometimes have to stop running for a little coughing fit) — they've always enjoyed physical activity, always enjoyed sports, but have never been particularly cooperative when it came to team sports (and always broke rules and got too violent when they'd try martial arts or boxing), so track suits them quite well. they quickly became one of the top performing team members and, though things were certainly rough in the beginning with byan being very abrasive and uninterested in their teammates, they've actually ended up pretty friendly with most of them over the months since they joined.

ㅤalthough they never planned to go to college, having zero interest in continuing in school once they were finally out of the hell of high school, they've come around on it a bit. this is mostly thanks to both lena and sol's encouragement and helping them realize they can go to learn something they actually care about — fashion design. almost entirely because of these two, byan is planning to apply to the local community college and is in the process of building a portfolio of their work for this purpose.

ㅤbecause of this plan, they're slowly becoming a (slightly) better student: attending class more regularly (though still skipping fairly often), paying a bit more attention in class, and even completing and handing in homework. they're actually on track to graduate now rather than flunking out. they may not graduate with flying colours, but it's enough for a diploma and that's all they care about.

ㅤjust because they're doing better doesn't mean that things are perfect, though. they still get discouraged a lot in their struggle with their (still undiagnosed) dyslexia, general inferiority complex, and overall difficulty in the typical school setting. it's not uncommon to hear them ranting about changing their mind about college, see them throw a textbook across the room, or catch them straight up burning their homework out of frustration. if they're feeling particularly awful and discouraged, they have a tendency to disappear for a few days, get themself into even more trouble than usual, get themself into more fights, and numb themself with drugs and/or alcohol. they come back around eventually, but sometimes it takes a bit of coaxing.

ㅤthough they still technically live in the group home, they spend almost no time there anymore, only really stopping by for food or appointments (when they don't blow them off, anyway). most nights they're either crashing on lena's couch or at sol's place, and even most of their belongings have been moved and split between these two locations.

ㅤat this point, the caretakers at the group home have more or less given up on trying to keep an eye on them or expecting any different behaviour from them. they've been in this particular home for several years at this point and, with their eighteenth birthday fast approaching (and with it the time where they'll be unable to stay there any longer), not much point is seen in trying to change anything anymore. byan has always been difficult to keep a handle on, efforts at controlling them to any extent met with aggressive rebellion, and it isn't seen as worth the hassle anymore. at least if they're off doing their own thing all the time, it means they're causing less trouble around the home.

ㅤthe boy they share a room with in the home, si-u, still covers for them a lot of the time, telling the caretakers and staff that oh yeah, byan was totally here last night. byan suspects he mostly does this because he likes having a room to himself, but it results in them being hounded a little less all the same, so they appreciate it.

ㅤof course, just because their future is looking a little less grim doesn't mean that everything has changed. they might have a boyfriend now, might have found themself some actual friends and even some familial figures, but they're still byan. they still love to go out and get themself into trouble, still love to fight, steal, and cause havoc for others, and still have a tendency to get themself in over their head or disappear without warning when their ptsd acts up. things are looking up and they might be feeling more fulfilled but, when it comes down to it, they're still them, and they still have a long way to go.

#feels like i'm missing something but this is most of what i've wanted to put out there #i want to make more of an effort at like. involving byan's development thanks to other muses consistent across the verse #i want it to have actual impact on them as a character no matter who i'm interacting with #i want their relationships with other muses to matter!!#i want to be able to mention the important people in their life in threads with others!!!#i want stuff to matter i want it all to intertwine i'm done with keeping everyone separate #and i'm done putting byan back to their default state when interacting with someone new!!!!!#their main verse especially will develop as their relationships with others develop and help them to grow and change as a person & characte #so here it is!!! this is where their main verse is at now thank u for ur time #......i'm actually having so much fun getting way to into talking about their verses though #so i think i'm gonna do one for their college verse & perhaps the future verse beyond that where they're an Adult adult too #possibly tonight while it's like. right here buzzing around in the front of my head.#idk bc i wanted to do some replies too but. we'll see we'll see i'm just rolling with it today #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ headcanon ⋮ danger in the fabric of this thing i made.#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ verse: modern ⋮ come on up / bring the pain.#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ verse details.

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