#and to many times it’s kept me here

[ciearcab]

goodbye dear jellie. thankyou for keeping me company in countless survival worlds

(old work- cats 2021)

#goodtimeswithscar #jellie the cat #gtwscar #i’ve drawn her so many times that it was too much to dig out every instance #instead here’s my favorite and one that meant a lot to me at the time. she’ll live on through every creeper kept out and bed shared.

[andromeda3116]

look, i know everyone said that the new interview with the vampire show was incredible but holy shit i was not prepared for how incredible this show is

like, not only is louis interesting now, he is incredibly compelling! his once-bland internal dilemma is now given actual weight because it's not just the same old Thou Shalt Not Kill But I Am Hungry story, it's tempered through his righteous fury at how black people have been treated all these years, how many people have wronged him and laughed and expected him to laugh along, how his ties to the community that once saved him are now turning to nooses around his throat, how his family that he once provided for and relied on have now come to fear him

that, combined with his explicit homosexuality, and with lestat being the only one who seemed to accept him and love him for all that he is, and how that is both comforting and incredibly toxic and combined with sam reid's insane charisma and mania and gravity as lestat that make it completely understandable why louis would still be drawn to him in spite of everything

and how they've used the changes from the original to this one to examine how memory shifts regarding someone who was so intense and formative in your life even if they were ultimately so controlling and abusive but still left such huge gouges in your personality like knives

like

fuck

this is the best-written show i have seen in a long time like this is top-tier writing holy shit

#interview with the vampire #iatw #i kept thinking ''eh idk if this is for me'' but now i'm just. frothing at the mouth over the quality and the nuance of the writing #and the incredible acting and the shifting timelines and the nods to the original not as easter eggs but integral parts of characterization #i mean. mind blown #at the sheer level of writing going on here like holy shit this deserves so many awards #FUCK AND CLAUDIA IS JUST #FUCK #like if i had to pick the ''worst time to be made immortal'' it would undoubtedly be 14 #i mean kirsten dunst being 10 is definitely awful but 14 would be so much worse #because you are on the very *cusp* of adulthood #and to be denied ever reaching that adulthood would be an unspeakable torture #like you're just old enough to *know* but just too young to really *experience* #and you're at the very peak of being Your Worst You #like 14 is undoubtedly the worst time to be made immortal #literally nobody would ever even remotely want to be 14 forever that's everyone's idea of hell

[non-un-topo]

My Neekeys over the last two-odd years. I was curious to see the changes 🤔

#forgive the low quality dfghfds it was just an experiment #now to do the DRAW ANYONE ELSE challenge #siggy draws #he is my blorbo. my muse. i guess #don't get me wrong. i am CRINGING and SWEATING at just the thought of uploading this. #have i been drawing almost every day my entire life? yes. does my style still change all the time? yes! #and i'm mostly self-taught so i struuuuggle a lot. i'll finally admit that reference pictures help immensely. no shit lol. #i learned a lot in the last 2 years!!! there are some really ugly ones i didn't show but i kept the cringe old ones sdfghfds help. #i mean they're still here on tumblr so i can't exactly hide them #you can kind of see when i actually started to use reference pictures. and when i got more used to using a tablet #idk digital art is so hard. it's a whole other world. but i'm in it now and haven't drawn traditionally in forever #i can also literally see how i used to CRUSH my nibs while drawing. all those really thin lines?? i pressed too hard lol #i've actually kept all my nibs since i started drawing digitally and....... it's too many fghfds #that one slightly more realistic nicky in the bottom right of the first collage lmaooo. i should finish him... maybe... it's haaard. #the top right on the first collage and bottom right on the second one are good comparisons ;_; they're both pirate!nico gifts for lily!! #i'm feeling sentimental now omg

[jomeimei421]

GYAAHHH people are reblogging ANCIENT art of mine

#mei talks #😭💀✌️ we don’t speak of Roosterteeth here any longer but #I genuinely do miss being in the RvB community! the people there were so so kind to me #I was something like 13 or 14 and still finding my legs art wise! I grew up in the community surrounded by people who #really poured their hearts and souls into their stuff and were sooo so kind to me #the art and writing communities were super tight and I actually am still in touch with many of them #including the man the myth the legend jason weight o7 you could have saved RvB if they kept you on for s18 king #like I still remember the day saltsanford sent me like. a 4 ask long text wall screaming about my lyric comic while I was in line at ax #nearly fainted #ahh my lyric comic….I still have it up on ur channel. before my dad passed away he would always show me when it hit a new milestone in view #old art is always kind of embarsssing and tbh I think my interpretations of the characters made me well known much more than my art skill #but after high school my life kind of. fell apart in a lot of ways. dad dying was def a part of that 💀 and I think I found orv exactly at #the time I needed it. but looking back at my old RvB stuff is kind of like #a little time capsule ig. I was happier then but I’ve grown up a lot too

[lab-gr0wn-lambs]

Look I'mma be honest every time twd kills off a long-beloved character at this point I'm just

#what's the point even #every time y'all kill off a character I just lose a reason to care #I'm just here for Carol and Daryl and Michonne's family #I dont rly care for Magna and Yumiko #Luke is fine #I like Connie but. that might just be because she's friends with Daryl idk #I'm still mad at Eugene #I don't care for Rosita #Gabriel and Aaron are cool I guess #Ezekiel's dying of cancer so. bye. #I like Jerry but we don't spend much time with him and I don't rly care #I'mma blast through the rest of this and tune back in for wenever Rick comes back lmao #christ god they used to have so many characters. so many actual good characters. #I'd say they didn't need to do us like that but a lot of those deaths were significant plot points #but then the show just kept going #and also a lot of those deaths were lame and stupid #like Tyreese. And Carl. T-Dog's death was so pointless it made me forget about him. #what was ever the point of Noah #they didn't have to do Enid like that #also! Alpha sucks. she's not a fun villain I just don't like her she makes my skin crawl #the govenor pissed me off more than anything but at least he was somewhat compelling #Alpha's just a child-beater and she whispers all cartoony fake-southern directly into my ears and I can't #I'm still enjoying the show but lol yeah I get it now #twd liveblog #the walking dead spoilers

[nemmet]

question: how did you discover/get into scooby doo?

this is something i'm always so interested to hear, being that there are few people who don't have at least some small tie to the franchise. whether you would consider it one of your biggest current interests or it's just something nostalgic from your childhood, i'd love to know how you found scooby and what it means to you!

#for me it was my dad! he grew up with the original show and wanted to introduce it to me #so one day when i was maybe? seven?? he came home with the winter wonderdog dvd and we watched it that night #from there we watched every single scooby doo movie that had ever been made #and got the new ones as they came out in subsequent years! #watching a new scooby movie with my dad every weekend are honestly some of my favourite childhood memories #also what's new scooby doo had also started airing on one of the main cartoon channels here in the uk around 2010 #so that's the show i watched the most consistently as a kid #velma was my original favourite of the gang because i looked a lot like her (big glasses/same haircut/etc.) #people would always compare me to her and it genuinely gave me a lot of confidence in my appearance that stays with me to this day #but fred was always my firm second favourite - he made me laugh the most of any character #and took on a deeper meaning to me in my adolescence when i realised i was autistic and strongly identified with his portrayals as such #the characters are probably what's kept me coming back all this time - they've been with me forever #and i love them individually + as a team who support each other with their unique skills and love for one another #but also the wacky adventures and general aesthetic #many people joke about the basic plot being the same every time but it makes my autistic brain happy #i love permanence and consistency baby!!!!! #and the different variations on that same formula always keep things fresh and fun #anyway ramble over #looking forward to hearing you guys' responses! :D #scooby doo #nem misc posts :]

[thedailyvio]

Day 75 - 82

Concept for @enjoliquej

WIP Below:

#This was all such a trip #I meant to do a very quick drawing but got really lost in the sauce and kept changing my mind on stuff #But this is the result of me avoiding any serious study for a few years now #It's so critical I can feel it sapping away my capacity on so many drawings lately jhbejhrgb #I mean I was also doing just a small amount each day but y'know #Being crushed like a bug be that way #Oh boy here come the times #Day 75 #30 Minutes #Day 76 #28 Minutes #Day 77 #24 Minutes #Day 78 #2 Hours 37 Minutes #Day 79 #46 Minutes #Day 80 #48 Minutes #Day 81 #~ #1 Hour #Day 82 #48 Minutes (pt2) #Total: 7 Hours 21 Minutes #Design

[hadesoftheladies]

hate going for christian weddings sometimes because i always see the prettiest women with the ugliest men, the sermon is always some shit about wives being slaves (but not like bad slavery, mutual slavery except the husband is a benevolent master which makes it okay) and making babies for their husband, the music is always lame, the mc is always weird and obnoxious, and older women keep fucking asking me when it's gonna be my turn and never take no for an answer.

#mine #personal #brief storytime in the tags #one of my family friends got married and i was happy she was happy #her parents are like an aunt and uncle to me #i was happy to share that moment with them #we cried and laughed together #and my friends #their other daughters were on the line and looked gorgeous #it was just beautiful watching us all grow up in a way and move on to “the next” together #BUT #im a pastor's kid #and my dad loves weddings #he drinks them in whenever he can now especially because they make him happy and he's had to attend a lot more funerals this year #he's been burdened a lot by how many people he's had to bury and how many hospital visits he's had to do #so i was happy to see him happy too #it just all felt so bittersweet to me #because i know how badly my parents want this for me and for themselves #there was a daddy-daughters dance at some point and i could feel my dad beaming beside me watching that #and i was a little sad about it because i was like im never gonna give you that #this could be the best thing i could ever give you and i will never give you this #i can never kneel at an altar in front of a pastor and swallow that sermon #i would never marry a man in my generation #if i married a woman you and almost the entire tent filled with people that watched me grow up would not attend #my happiest day would be another funeral for you #it was worse because im kind of a small celebrity in this community because of my parents and their siblings who are politicians #so people i barely knew kept coming up and asking me when it would be my turn and how they so looked forward to the day #and i was like i love that we're a community here and i missed the pestering of aunts since i left church #but at the same time i was glad to remember why i left #there is no freedom to be myself at all with them because all they do is project their beliefs and ideas on me because that's what children

[toastsnaffler]

in a hilarious turn of events my flatmate didn't even know I use any pronouns....

#i thought when she was talking abt how her parents thought i was gonna come out as trans and kept checking my name/pronouns- #that the joke was that im ALREADY trans but in ways they dont know abt.... but nope she genuinely didnt know 🤭 #to be fair. i dont rly let anyone in on my gender business unless we're close enough to be dating or its an anonymous online space #like im legally cis and thats fine. idc abt ppl using my name + she/her bc thats not my gender identity its just AN identity that i use- #to navigate the world without ppl being fucking nosy bc i pass as + am sociopolitically treated as a woman (if butch lol) #to ppl who are friends ill joke that my gender is dyke (true) and to friends whose gender falls on a similar spectrum- #or who are transmasc ill talk a little more honestly abt it bc theyre usually able to understand better than anyone else #other butch dykes w a weird gender going on are the only motherfuckers who actually Get It but theyre hard to come by tbh #to be frank i dont fucking know whats going on w my gender. and i dont rly care enough to do the introspection to figure it out rn #i have so many other problems in my life and im lucky that most of my beef w gender can be solved by presenting butch + binding #and using any pronouns around other queer ppl. its actually incredibly funny to me when ppl she/her me bc its like tch. this chump hasnt #unlocked my level of gender yet. pronouns and names in general are so far disconnected from the way i exist in the world... #its just smth thats fun for me to play around with + makes me feel weird sometimes but in ways i havent distilled yet yknow #and this has been my approach to gender for like?? 4-5 years now??? and likely will continue to be for a long while.. #anyway. its not actually that surprising my flatmate doesnt know bc shes cis so ive never felt compelled to have a deeper conversation #abt gender with her. but also i could sweeaaar its been mentioned bc almost all our other friends are trans lol #and also ive been introducing myself at queer sports socials w any pronouns and i swear i talked abt that w her..... whatever #and my pronouns are on discord and shes def seen my tumblr before but maybe i didnt have them in my bio at the time... i digress #i kind of prefer cis ppl she/hering me tbh. theyre not able to they them or he him or whatever else me in a way that matters..... #altho i do find it fascinating when she or other ppl elect to use neutral or masculine terms for me. raising an eyebrow and taking notes #like when she got a job and joked abt me being her househusband.. pulling up the fem/masc tally chart and chalking a line up #a la nona the ninth.... ive been trying to figure out whos inhabiting this body my entire fucking life with no luck girl #ANYWAY just smth to think abt. im so tired i think my brain is gonna start seeping out my eyeballs #im gonna watch some more pluto and read and then -> 🛌 #another 6:30 start tomorrow woohoo #.diaries #zzzzz

[plague-of-insomnia]

ever had a day you felt you just could not exist?

#today was that day #it’s like my mood and physical symptoms decided to get together against a common enemy (me) #:/ #i think part of it is the ongoing stress from the doctor situation #plus the pca i started working with who i thought i could rely on #told me last night she basically can only do things around the house during our designated time slot #i cannot drive #we do not have public transport here #so if hubby is working down town i don’t have any way to go or get many things #and i thought i could count on her and that would be one less thing on my stress pile #but noooo apparently #sigh #not kuro #personal #btw this isn’t a suicide thing #it’s more like…. #uh how to explain #idk like my brain and body kept giving me the blue screen of death so i couldn’t work today #🤷🏻 a very inelegant and not quite accurate metaphor but here we go

[thelvadams]

i'm not one to dwell on the passage of time, but what do you mean metal gear solid v: ground zeroes is a decade old today??

#i was in a weird place in 2014 and the anticipation for ground zeroes (and phantom pain) was really something that kept me going #there's not many other games that have/had such an impact on me #i remember talking about it with my friends who hadn't even played mgs... good times #also it still holds up better than most games released today #i'm so sad the snake eater remake isn't using the fox engine... it was perfect #anyway here's to you ground zeroes #metal gear #metal gear solid #ground zeroes #mgs v

[another-goblin]

It's been established that people can look however they want in the dreamworld, even up to their species.

So (in addition to Sparkle being able to impersonate anyone), how can we be sure of anybody's identity?

How do we know, for example, that Firefly isn't actually some sleazy elderly millionaire who likes to pretend that he's a teenage girl to mess with people?

#honkai star rail #my stuff #penacony is so creepy #i'm not even talking about other things #like the ability to change people's emotion without them noticing #so how can we know any of our emotions in the dream are genuine #the family's ability do erase people's memories #people's ability to accidentally conjure monsters by being too emotional #or the fact that people we meet can be dead for centuries in the real world #and kept here against their will #so how many people in the dream are ghosts or bots #and btw how many people actually die in the real world hotel #from thirst or drowning #how many bodies are decomposing in these bathtubs right now #and don't tell me the family will bother to check on them untill it's the time for the person to check out #I mean #if you do some sidequests #and talk to npcs #this whole place is absolutely horrifying. #penacony #“Planet of Festivities” my ass

[dabruzzy]

When I first watched Onyx Equinox I thought Yun's behavior was a bit inconsistent. He spent most of the first half of the season trying to get K'in and Izel to stop fighting and trying to keep K'in in check, but by the end of the season he was picking fights with everyone except Izel, even K'in. Now just because he's the heart of the group doesn't mean he can't have his disagreements with other characters, or that he should just be the peacekeeper and nothing else, but you'd think the guy who never held a grudge against the boy who broke his leg and almost killed him would be more understanding of Zyanya's situation, or that he would be more willing to give Xanastaku the benefit of the doubt, but he isn't. And after rewatching the show many times I think his problem is that he has trust issues and that they probably stem from Maak.

Putting the rest under a read more cause it got kinda long.

Yun straight up called him out in episode 3 about all the things he's hiding from them. Also "Honoch Maak" means "Old Man" in Yucatec Maya, and if I remember correctly Sofia Alexander said that's not his real name in the podcast, so that's another thing he's hiding from the twins. And then they find out that he sold children into slavery, and you can see that Yun was more affected by that than K'in. So because of this he's probably wary of people who keep secrets.

This is especially obvious with Xanastaku. He's had mixed feelings about her since they met. Every time they make one step forward something happens that makes him doubt her again. Even in episode 10 he's still suspicious of her despite saving Izel's life because she didn't tell them she had that power. Even when she's helpful he still has a problem with her because she's not being fully honest with them.

Now Zyanya is a bit different because she did betray them and almost got them killed, and that's reason enough to dislike someone even when you don't have trust issues. But like I said Izel almost killed him and he never even got mad at him, he worried more about Izel's wellbeing than his own. So I do think that the fact that he was willing to trust her and she broke that trust and that she hid so many things from them played a part in why he had such a hard time forgiving her, and even after he did he still didn't really acknowledge her or interact with her. Even in episode 8 Xanastaku told him "Trust us. Trust Izel", possibly implying that's something he struggles with.

And on the other hand this could be a reason why he and Izel mostly get along. Izel is an open book, he wears his heart on his sleeves and he never lied or kept secrets from the team.

#onyx equinox #yun #probably stating the obvious here #or maybe i'm pulling this out of my ass idk #maybe he just hates women /j #but i saw someone say he was being an asshole in ep 10 and that got me thinking #also if it's true it's a nice contrast with izel who is too trusting #and i also wonder how he would react if he found out that k'in knew about xana's power #and kept it a secret for like 5 minutes lmao #i mean he should know technically right? cause yaotl heard them so yun should've heard them too #and probably didn't have the time to process it cause things were constantly happening #anyways. many thoughts about these characters

[patrice-bergerons]

I'm at that age now where my high school teachers have started dying and I don't like it at all 😔

#he never even taught me but we shared the same school bus for years #see im here writing these tags but i strubbornly don't want to write *was* #a true extrovert someone who was always interested in others whether the students or the bus driver #he'd always make conversation #and an honorary turk too -- he was canadian but moved to Istanbul married in Istanbul ages ago #and he lived on the Asian side instead of on campus like almost all other foreign teachers #so he'd talk to the bus driver in turkish #in a time that was so rough it was always something i could look forward to you know? #and i wish id kept in touch #and i wjsh he was still here #he wasn't even that old #and he deserved so many years at the mediterrenean coast living the true emekli life #oh mr carter

[chirpsythismorning]

📝 💐 🛼 💔⏪️💭🧊🌄❤️‍🩹

I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor

previous ⏪︎ now playing ⏩ next back to playlist

#stranger things #bizarre love triangle playlist #el hopper #el's pov #i was so happy when i re-listened to this alongside the lyrics when looking for songs from el's pov #'at first i was afraid. i was petrified. kept thinking i could never live without you by my side' #all season long we saw el experiencing heartache over mike and how it led to her feeling insecure as if it was all her fault #she was convinced that if mike didn't love her then she couldn't be happy #'but then i spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong and i grew strong and i learned how to get along' #el spending time away from mike at nina along with all the months of doubt prior to their fallout now having validation... #it wasn't just her loving and falling out of love with mike over the course 3 days #it was her realization that their relationship has been deteriorating for a while now and coming to terms with that in 3 days #'and so you're back from outer-space. i just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face' #this is the main line that reminds me of her brushing past mike and will in the cabin #probably a little more harsh as this song is pretty harsh in terms of the singer not being capable of seeing her ex as even a friend now #but el's earned some harshness after what just went down #that doesn't mean they'll never overcome this #it just means there is still a serious need to confront it which wont be super pretty #and then the forgiveness and acceptance can only come after that #'and you see me. somebody new. i'm not the chained up little person still in love with you' #oooooo get him! #'you think i'd crumble? you think i'd lay down and die?' #sort of reminds me of the assumptions not just mike has but also most of the audience #they think it would be impossible for mike to end things with el bc she would be so broken hearted and she doesn't deserve that #which of course she doesn't #but maybe el knows what she deserves... and it's more than what mike is able to give #'i've got all my life to live and i've got all my love to give and i'll survive. i will survive.' #she's not going to go on forever being hung up on something that wasn't what she deserved in the first place #she will survive ya'll #4x09

[neonacidtrip]

“ And it hurts so much! Life is suffering. It is hard! The world is cursed. But still, you find reasons to keep on living." ... "I don't regret a thing, you know. I don't regret the struggles. I don't regret the hardships. The pain. The sorrow. And I've seen so much of it! But still. I don't regret what I've done or how I've lived my life. I just wish the world had been a better place. A better place for them, for us... But surely, a better place for you, my dear." ... "I feel like a vast vessel, with so many dusty rooms and cabins... I have so many of them... So many memories... Some of them are gone, but some of them... Some of them will live on forever. In you, in others. ”

- Astrid, Spiritfarer Farewell Edition

#just in case it was not clear #astrid was probably my favorite spiritfarer character #and im very emo about this quote of hers #shes just such an icon. one of the most versatile characters in terms of perks #shes so cute. she unionizes a company. shes a ww2 survivor and risked her life protecting children #and shes just so heckin cute #i wanted to take even more of the quote but i felt like this part encapsulates most of what i wanted #I feel like a vast vessel with so many dusty rooms and cabins... I have so many of them... So many memories... #im not cryings youre crying #i really feel this quote lately though so i wanted to share it #i put it as my discord status but that didnt feel like quite enough this time around #this is one of those 'can you believe this amazing thing was said by an [insert character here]' things #astrid was like a top three for me along with stanley and probably gustov #i say this even though i got attached to literally all of the characters #except giovanni. could not sympathize a lot with giovanni #its like gwen is wonderful but she leaves you so quickly #bruce and mickey are great but they take a while to grow on you #atul is so lovely but he just LEAVES YOU and also his banging upsets everyone #im not over atul leaving. will never be over it. i stopped the game and googled it because i kept thinking he would come back #elena and jackie and daria are weird ones. i like them but im not sure i love them #alice is another one who is so hecking cute #i think alice and stanley and astrid were the saddest goodbyes for me #i loved them so much but also they were just sad on their own. stanley is just a kid #alices dementia is so long lasting and heartbreaking to witness #and astrids rapid deterioration after giovanni leaves hits very close to home for me #anyway im rambling again but i just love astrid so much what a queen she deserved better than giovanni #astrid #astrid (spiritfarer) #spiritfarer #spiritfarer farewell edition