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goldlighter · 10 months

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small headcanon list of things that aren’t important enough to write my usual 3k essays on. updated: 27.06.23.

chris has an issue answering phones at night ( it’s mentioned in the pre-re1 novel that it’s a fear stemming from receiving the call that his parents had died ). aside from that, he’s notoriously bad at answering his phone as it is, but at night it’s almost impossible to reach him by call - he does respond to texts though.

chris’ apartment isn’t particularly large or extravagant, but it’s extremely cozy, if not cramped. he lives with 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 ( verse / thread dependant ofc ) because it’s easier for the both of them to share since they are both out of the country for extended periods of time and it allows them more chances to see each other when they’re both home.

following on from above, it’s not uncommon for 𝐦𝐨𝐢𝐫𝐚 to crash for a week or two, same with 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥. after 𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐬 was released from bsaa quarantine, he moved in ( at chris’ insistence, stemming from a lot of guilt and how 𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐬 now needed care until he adjusted ) but 𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐬 has made himself quite comfortable. the 𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐝 household is one that is often full of people, and he likes it that way.

he used to very much be a dog person but, like all things, umbrella ruined that. he’s not...scared of them, but he gets very uncomfortable, agitated and anxious around them ( especially the breeds used for cerberus ) - after all, he watched dogs rip joseph apart. similarly, he gets very uncomfortable around open fires ( due to having to burn the bodies to prevent crimson heads, antartica and edonia ).

as a teenager with a bad attitude, he tried to be a rebellious rock kid but it didn’t really work out because he was genuinely too nice. the only thing he kept from it was the issues with authority and his guitar ( which was unfortunately lost, like his car, in raccoon’s destruction ).

whilst he lived in raccoon, he had a shitty apartment that rarely had power. most of his money went straight to 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞, both to fund her college tuition and provide for her as he was now the adult of the family, so he could only afford rent. luckily, he spent a lot of time crashing at the burton’s or 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥’s place. a lot of time too, whoever was the first to arrive at the STARS office would find him asleep at the desk because he hadn’t gone home.

chris' sex life died with 𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲, so to speak. he enjoyed the attention he got being a young police offer, ex-air force pilot, attractive cis white man who was charismatic. sex took a priority once he and 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥 began fighting bioterrorism and eventually became a silent frustration for him as a very physical guy. following his tbi, excessive trauma and alcoholism, sex has become even less of a priority and one night stands are completely off the table due to his own issues with self-image and performance following his health complications.

romance, similarly, has often been off the table - partly due, for many years, to his "secret" pining for 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥 ( though everyone knows it ). after her "death" he briefly attempted to go on a few dates, after being pushed by 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 repeatedly to try and move on as chris' grief was becoming consuming, but these ended disastrously. he's also unwilling to even consider dating someone who is his subordinate ( exceptions for people who he was involved with prior who then had their rank lowered / changed to another role ).

chris' heart is his biggest weakness. even after everything he's seen and been through and his attempts to maintain a professional relationship and clear boundary between personal life and professional, it never works. even in village, his attempts to treat 𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 as a civilian are awkward, aggressive and ultimately pointless as he ends up getting involved anyway. he could have called in the squad to extradite 𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 from the area, given 𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 is a civilian as far as he was aware, but didn't, instead choosing to work alongside 𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 ( though poorly, it's fine capcom ).

despite popular opinion, chris can cook - he had to, after all, he was the sole provider for his sister. he's not particularly good at it but he can cook a decent meal, but rarely cooks for himself, often preferring to take the "lazy" route and get takeout instead. in 𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲, he would go to emmy's diner every night, both unwilling to cook after a long day at work but also for the atmosphere and company.

the little girl chris & 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥 found and protected in the caucasus, anna, is someone he keeps in touch with regularly. sometimes, she stays with chris for christmas.

the penny in chris’ stars wallet ( and kept with him since then ) was his father’s so-called lucky penny. depending how you view his constant survival, it may or may not be so lucky.

despite their opposing personalities, chris really liked jessica. whilst he was somewhat oblivious to her flirting (and on times when he recognised it, assumed it was joking), she was a capable soa and was confident in her abilities. jessica’s betrayal did shake him - it hurt, though certainly not as much as say, 𝐰𝐞𝐬𝐤𝐞𝐫’s betrayal - but he thought they had a good friendship and especially since he’d worked with her as a partner for a few missions ( which is rare that he would ever work with someone who isn’t 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥 ). it made him question the bsaa and who worked for them, since no one had suspected she was a double agent, and more so his trust in people, which only confirmed his paranoia was something to take into account. if jessica did reappear, he would have a lot of anger for her - but would probably be willing to listen to her if she wanted to explain, because that’s just how he is. he’s probably convinced jessica had to for some reason he doesn’t understand, not because she was a double agent from the start.

he used to ride a motorcycle, but traded it for a more ‘adult’ car when he joined STARS. it was a silver shelby cobra ( again, mentioned in the pre-re1 novel ) that also got destroyed in raccoon. he’s still upset about it.

thanks to merah, he’s managed to pick up bits and pieces of indonesian but he’s not fluent. it’s mostly just nicknames and insults she would call him and 𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐬, along with food orders.

official or not, chris considers himself to be godfather to 𝐦𝐨𝐢𝐫𝐚 and polly.

given his quotation of transformers in re5, he’s more of a dork than he lets on and most definitely watched transformers, teenage mutant ninja turtles, he-man, etc.

prior to leaving for europe, chris put a lot of his valuables into storage - unfortunately, not enough, as he thought he’d be coming back to 𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 and irons wouldn’t allow him to collect any of his things from the s.t.a.r.s office when he was fired. whilst some of it was sentimental, it also served as evidence ( if nothing else for himself ). with raccoon’s destruction, the box of mementos is some of the only proof he ever had a life there. it’s a box that’s rarely looked at and remains tucked away under his bed collecting dust - there’s some old drawings 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 did of them as a kid that he kept pinned to his fridge once upon a time ( much to her embarrassment ), old fading polaroids of s.t.a.r.s ( many of which were taken of him, joseph and forest ), his id badge and keycard for the rpd, and the dogtags collected from forests corpse on the balcony of the arklay mansion ( he couldn’t get to joseph’s, and he and forest had been friends since the military ). he used to reminisce over it on occasion, but since edonia he hasn’t opened it up once as he doesn’t want to admit the brain injury has caused him to struggle with remembering the names of his fallen friends.

he flew himself and 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 back from antartica with several broken ribs ( as being blown out of an elevator onto the nose of a jet via explosion will do that to you ) and upon arriving in europe and finding 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 and 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥, was promptly smacked in the face by 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥 for leaving without a word and not telling anyone where he’d went because he was trying to play hero.

after 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥’s ‘death’ in 2006, chris’s drinking started to get out of hand. despite the fact he was almost never home ( much against 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞’s wishes ), he was often working alone on missions - whether from the bsaa or following up on his own information and sources he’d scraped together. first it started as something to distract him from his grief, but eventually grew into a dependency needed to sleep and to forget - a lifetime of unacknowledged and untreated trauma started to catch up with him, and 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥’s death had been the catalyst for it all rising to the surface. with no one around to recognise the warning signs, it steadily got worse. eventually, it was 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 who confronted him about it after an accidental overdose of sleeping pills coupled with extremely heavy drinking - it’s something that’s stayed between the two. despite 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 being a father figure, he has his own children to look after, and so couldn’t keep an eye on chris’s drinking following that - not that he would have been able to even without 𝐦𝐨𝐢𝐫𝐚 and polly. when 𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐥 was found and recovered, the habit didn’t stop. whilst she might have her suspicions, especially in the months following kijuju, chris managed to keep it hidden for the most part simply because she was in rehabilitation and being monitored by the bsaa which allowed him to go back to the habit when she wasn’t around.

chris' relationship with 𝐥𝐞𝐨𝐧 is stressed at best and antagonistic at worst and often suffers from the fact his main connection to the man is through 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 - so his opinion is influenced by her perception, especially when she's mad at 𝐥𝐞𝐨𝐧. he doesn't dislike 𝐥𝐞𝐨𝐧, but just can't seem to avoid an argument or two every time they interact. despite this, he has a lot of respect for him and appreciates what he does, but the majority of their interaction comes at the behest of and under the supervision of 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞. he thinks 𝐥𝐞𝐨𝐧 is fighting a losing battle with regards to politics, and thinks the bureaucracy of working for the us government is 𝐥𝐞𝐨𝐧's real job, not fighting bioterrorism and eventually, he'll have to pick between one or the other.

something chris really wants to do is have a family. he’s always been a very family orientated person and he’s always wanted to be a dad. in his youth the idea of settling down and having the little white picket fence seemed absurd and far from anything he’d want, but in the absence of having a normal life it’s become an unobtainable goal. he’s almost fifty now, and especially following his brain damage and everything that came with it, he can’t keep doing this forever but doesn’t feel like there’s any other option. it’s not like him to sit idly by, and he’s been out of a normal life for so long that he doesn’t know how to live one any more. even if he settled down and had the chance to have kids, he wouldn’t want to have them in a world where these things are still happening and getting worse every time - because he knows he couldn’t give up trying to stop them and he doesn’t want to leave his children without their father because he’s been through that.

related to the above, he absolutely dotes on rosemary. he tries to be the good but stern father and guide her, but she has him absolutely wrapped around her tiny fingers.

aside from that, he really wants to walk 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 down the aisle. even if her youth, much like him, she was a heartbreaker and a playboy but she’s always been great with kids - whilst he isn’t ever sure he would be an uncle, he wanted to walk her down the aisle when she got married. but given how things went, and how similar she is to him and her refusal to get out of this life, he knows it’s probably not going to happen. it doesn’t stop him from trying to convince her though - because he knows if she ever does get married, he’s running out of time that he’ll be able to do it. 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 go get married so he can. you can get divorced afterwards it’s fine.

despite the bonds he has and how he values and respects each and every friend and partner he's had, chris would not bring them along as part of hound squad with a few minor exceptions soley due to the fact that it is a risky rogue operation that could put them in danger - and though they could probably handle that and manage just fine, their careers would also be on the line. he knows that with his actions, the bsaa are likely monitoring his communications and by contacting anyone such as 𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐯𝐚 or 𝐣𝐨𝐬𝐡, parker, keith, sophie, he's putting them at risk. one exception is quint, who has been assisting in feeding them information and covering their tracks . whilst he's willing to risk his own, he's not going to use, endanger and destroy the livelihoods of those he cares about for his moral compass. following his suspension, he finally got what he wanted, passing over his mantle to @greenherb's 𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐬 as his replacement, taking nadia and dc from silver dagger and absorbing them into hws ( capcom forgot them but i won't ) and keeping extremely limited contact with those he trusts.

#[ 🌿 ] development . › headcanon .

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genuflectx · 7 months

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Terato Book Review: The Scorpion's Mate (Iriduan Test Subjects #1)

I picked this one up because it was the only monster romance novel I could easily find which had an almost entirely insectoid love interest. The first half has vague spoilers, such as descriptions of sex and if there was a happy end or not. Under the cut you’ll find a longer review with detailed spoilers. Here we go!

The Scorpion's Mate (Iriduan Test Subjects #1) by Susan Trombley. Claire gets randomly abducted while UFO hunting with friends and finds herself naked in a clinical, empty room which reminds her of a bug box. She soon meets Thrax, a half-insect-half-elfish-alien mutant who really, really wants to break open that box. Claire learns she's meant to be Thrax's mate so that the Iriduans can breed a race of super mutant soldiers.

This book is 30+ chapters of... varied length, and its plot was more shallow than the summary makes it out to be.

PROS ★ ★ ★

Thrax is pretty darn monstrous/alien! He has two venomous stingers, a hidden scorpion's mouth, and chitinous plates all over his body. Except Claire is disgusted by his arthropod mouth -.-'

There is smut and I found it to be inciting, save for the occasional unsexy word. Note the sex is relatively vanilla itself.

Breeding kink, aphrodisiacs, pheromones, and a uhh... creative reason to suck dick.

Competent enough to sit down and enjoy without needing a lot of mental energy.

A happy ending and no major character death.

CONS ★ ★ ★

The dialogue is generic and while the underlying plot had potential for a grand adventured, it actually is quite shallow.

It tries to be self aware at the beginning but then simply falls into the cliches it made fun of anyway.

The ending was rushed all to Hell. There are large time skips that feel unnatural and something just absurd for the last chapter.

Caricature-like villains made parts of the story feel cartoonish in an unfun way.

Trombley is more masterful at writing pure passion than she is at writing love and long-term romance.

Personally, I just don't think first person perspective works with smutty romance novels. It makes it awkward. Someone else may disagree.

★ ★ ★ WOULD I RECOMMEND THIS BOOK TO TERATO FANS?

Sure! It has good sex scenes and an interesting alien love interest. While I do think The Scorpion's Mate's writing is watery, this was written in 2018 and I have hope that more modern works by Trombley have improved. So, I think I will check out some of her more recent writing and see how it compares. However, I will not be reading more of the Iriduan Test Subjects series because the first book did not capture me enough to want to continue with this universe or these characters. It might capture you, though, and the 2nd book features a kraken alien as a love interest.

★ ★ ★ FINAL RATINGS:

Monsterousness: 8/10 Eroticism: 8/10 Story: 5/10 Characters: 5/10

MY FINAL SCORE: 6/10 (Generic romance novel with non-generic alien)

Spoiler time! Let's start with the writing and the good things.

This is the book that pops into your brain when someone talks about cheesy romance novels. Something generic, a little amateur, with a hot body builder hunk and a Hallmark movie plot. Some people enjoy that kind of thing, and if you're looking for a book not very complicated that relies heavily on smut you may really like The Scorpion's Mate! You can even just ignore the "plot" parts if you don't care for them. I did find the sex scenes to be enjoyable, and Trombley writes passion well.

That said, The Scorpion's Mate tries to make fun of the cheesy romance genre from chapter 1, quote: "I dog-eared the page I was on and tossed it into the back. 'These romance novels are all the same.'"

Unfortunately, self-awareness does not a better novel make. It makes fun of romance novels and the idea of falling into the lap of someone that should be big and strong and mean but who just so happens to like the main character, then love ensues. And then it does just that! The self-awareness then becomes second hand embarrassment.

Additionally, it uses first person perspective (I/me), which I personal find to be awkward in a smutty romance novel. This is because first person is great for journals, friends telling you stories, and interviews. So when a smutty romance novel is first person it feels like some girl you never met is gabbing to you about her very explicit sex life, or like you're reading a stranger's smutty diary. Someone else may feel differently, though, and this may actually be a plus for them.

The characters were... hmmm...

Speaking of Hallmark, while Claire's traits do not automatically make her a bad character, the way Trombley presents them gives her traits the impression of "not like other girls, but like so totally humble about it." (See my notes at the very end for more details)

All the characters have this shallow layer of characterization to them. Traits are tacked on, but rarely anything is actually done with them. Most traits and histories are left as a sentence or two; a lot of telling but not showing. For example, there's maybe two or three sentences tops about her father's death, but at the very end she says: "I’d already lost my father, and that had broken something inside me that it took falling in love with an alien to fix." Except... Claire was never sad in this book? "Broken?" Girl, where?

Instead, time is spent towards kindling the budding relationship between Claire and Thrax, if you could call it that. Their relationship boils down to Thrax protecting Claire and fucking her. By the end Trombley calls this love but I didn't see any love, just passion and sex. They don't have anything in common, never talk about things. A surface level relationship built upon pheromones, circumstance, and sudden time skips. There is no meat to their relationship but I did find the sex scenes hot.

Except for the alien dick cheese eating.

That bit was sorta weird, not gonna lie. A major plot point is Claire won't eat eels out of a sewer so Thrax concocts food for her like a mama bird that can only be excreted through his dick hole. Which when she eats, gets her super horny. I love the sex pollen trope, but in this case it came off as Trombley just not knowing how to get her characters to fuck without mind altering substances. So she makes her eat dick cheese for weeks. And then, when they are rescued, SHE STILL EATS DICK CHEESE! Girl has a homestead and fresh cooked meals but she still gobbles that alien dick cheese down like a starved animal! Sorry but 🤢

Aaand the plot

Scenes felt out of order as if Trombley mixed up her outline, characters make unintuitive decisions so Trombley can insert her fav fanfic tropes, and the last chapter was absurd. Literally soap opera absurd. The majority of the book is spent fucking around in a sewer doing nothing significant.

After the characters escape into the sewer... Thrax just stops running to fish for eels living in the water. Then they fuck. In the sewer. Nobody has come after them yet, either. Then they find a house janitors' used to live in (in the sewer) and then stay there for weeks fucking and eating dick cheese (sewer house) because Trombley wanted to use the "locked in a room" (locked in a sewer house) trope. Again, nobody ever comes after them and they are in the literal sewer right beneath the research facility. They had the option to escape too, but decided to piddle about for weeks. Claire even remarked: "If the Iriduans were still searching for us, they weren’t doing a very good job." This is stupid and makes their captors look super incompetent.

Some boring stuff happens and then, at the very end after Claire pops a baby out of her, her friend Ava who was there for like 2 seconds in 1 chapter at the start is suddenly there in the hospital room! Wearing a spacesuit and talking about destiny! WHAT! Where on Earth did that come from?? My notes describe my reaction best:

Some last goofy points and quotes:

Claire has 100k followers on YouTube for her dancing, is a super popular cosplay designer, gets hate online, sympathizes with insects while her friends scream at them, she's goth, "He didn’t really want me. Not the woman I am, with all my flaws," etc.

...At the end she teaches a few aliens industrial dance and after a week the entire galactic internet is doing her dance and asking her to make them Earth clothes. The entire. Galactic. Internet. But you know, its like, no biggie. Cause Claire is just, like, a flawed nobody, ya know?

Overuse of cheesy sci-fi words, particular "the before-times" and "now-times." Very Star Trek TOS episode language but less endearing.

Cartoony government villain scientists who think humans are inferior but feel the need to explain everything about their plan to one of those inferior humans anyway. Inconsistent characterization, because at the end the main villain even says: “I’m disappointed in you. I thought you were better than that.” At no point did the villains ever express the idea that they believed humans were capable of anything -.-

From my notes: "apparently she shaved her puss as soon as they got rescued?? ok. priorities"

Chapter 18 was super long and smutty, but chapter 19 was a useless transition where they just talked about eating for… at most 500 words? Weird decision.

Thrax had to think really hard to remember what a tongue was when referring to Claire's anatomy even though... he himself had a tongue.

Claire demanded to know how many women Thrax had been with and was jealous, but when he asks her the same she gets angry and says its none of his business. Ah, true love.

Trombley gave us a story about an insectoid with a hidden arthropod mouth and then had Claire be disgusted by it the entire book. Even the scene where she looks at it up close doesn't quell her continued disgust. Lame u.u

Thrax has two venomous tails that he can inject pleasurable venom with to make the victim feel good and happy, but even after talking about using it on Claire twice Trombley never delivers on that threat. Basically she wiggled a secondary aphrodisiac kink over our heads and never used it.

#the scorpion's mate #review #book review #terato #exophilia

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thewidowsghost · 3 years

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The Unknown Muggleborn - Chapter 10

3rd Person POV

Quirrell, however, must have been braver than Harry, Ron, and Hermione had thought. In the weeks that follow he did seem to be getting paler and thinner, but it didn't look as though he had cracked it.

Every time they pass the third-floor corridor, Harry and Ron would press their ears to the door to check that Fluffy is growling inside.

Whenever Harry passes Quirrell he gives him a small smile, and Ron started telling people off for his stutter.

Hermione and (Y/n) had more on their minds than the Sorcerer's Stone. Hermione had started drawing up study schedules and the two had been color-coding all their notes. Ron and Harry watch in amazement as (Y/n) launches into some complicated Potions thing at Hermione's request and the brunette begins jotting down notes.

Harry and wouldn't have minded, but Hermione kept nagging them to do the same.

"Hermione, the exams are ages away."

"Ten weeks," Hermione snaps.

"That's not ages," (Y/n) pipes up, "that's like a second to Nicholas Flamel."

"But we're not six hundred years old," Ron reminds her. "Anyway, what are you four studying for, you all ready know it all!"

"What are we studying for?" (Y/n) exclaims. "Are you crazy? You realize we need to pass these exams to get into our second year? They're very important, we should have started studying a month ago."

"I don't know what's gotten into me," Hermione chimes in.

Unfortunately, the teachers seem to be thinking along the same lines as Hermione and (Y/n). They pile so much homework on them that the Easter holidays weren't nearly as much fun as the Christmas ones. It is hard to relax with Hermione and (Y/n) next to you reciting the twelve uses of dragon's blood or practicing wand movements. Moaning and yawning, Harry and Ron spent most of their free time in the library with them, trying to get through all their extra work.

"I'll never remember this," Ron bursts out one afternoon, throwing down his quill and looking longingly out of the library windows. It is the first really fine day they'd had in months. The sky is a clear, forget-me-not blue, and there is a feeling in the air of summer coming.

Harry, who is looking up "Dittany" in One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi, didn't look up until he hears Ron says, "Hagrid! What are you doing in the library?"

Hagrid shuffles into view, hiding something behind his back. He looks very out of place in his moleskin overcoat.

"Jus' lookin'," he says, in a shifty voice that gets their interest at once. "An'what're you lot up ter?" He looks suddenly suspicious. "Yer not still lookin' fer Nicolas Flamel, are yeh?"

"Oh, we found out who he is ages ago," says Ron impressively. "And we know what that dog's guarding, it's a Sorcerer's St —"

"Shhhh!" Hagrid looks around quickly to see if anyone is listening."Don' go shoutin' about it, what's the matter with yeh?"

"There are a few things we wanted to ask you, as a matter of fact," says Harry, "about what's guarding the Stone, apart from Fluffy -"

"Don't rope me into this," (Y/n) says, not looking up from her potions notes.

"SHHH!" says Hagrid again. "Listen - come an' see me later, I'm not promisin' I'll tell yeh anythin', mind, but don' go rabbitin' about it in here, studens aren' s'pposed ter know. They'll think I've told yeh-"

"See you later, then," says Harry.

Hagrid shuffles off.

"What was he hiding behind his back?" says Hermione thoughtfully.

"Do you think it had anything to do with the Stone?" Harry wonders.

"I'm going to see what section he was in," says Ron, who'd had enough of working. He comes back a minute later with a pile of books in his arms and slams them down on the table. "Dragons!" he whispers. "Hagrid was looking up stuff about dragons!Look at these: Dragon Species of Great Britain and Ireland; From Egg to Inferno, A Dragon Keeper's Guide."

"Hagrid's always wanted a dragon, he told me so the first time I ever met him."

"But it's against our laws," (Y/n) comments, still gazing down at her notes, Snape had told her that he was giving her a more advanced exam than everyone else's. "Dragon breeding was outlawed by the Warlocks' Convention of 1709."

"Everyone knows that," Ron agrees. "It's hard to stop Muggles from noticing us if we're keeping dragons in the back garden - anyway, you can't tame dragons, it's dangerous. You should see the burns Charlie's got of wild ones in Romania."

"But there aren't wild dragons in Britain?" asks Harry.

"Of course there are," says Ron. "Common Welsh Green and Hebridean Blacks. The Ministry of Magic has a job hushing them up, I can tell you. Our kind have to keep putting spells on Muggles have spotted them, to make them forget."

"So what on earth is Hagrid up to?" wonders Hermione wonders aloud.

. . .

When they knock on the gamekeeper's hut an hour later, they are surprised to see that ll the curtains are closed. Hagrid calls, "Who is it?" before he had let them in, and then shuts the door quickly behind them.

It is stifling hot inside, and (Y/n) rolls up the sleeves of her shirt and Fang jumps into her lap.

"So - yeh wanted to ask me something?"

"Yes," says Harry, seeing no point in beating around the bush. "We were -"

"Not me, just to be clear," (Y/n) interjects and Hagrid glances gratefully at her.

"Wondering," Harry continues, "if you could tell us what's guarding eh Sorcerer's Stone apart from Fluffy."

Hagrid frowns at him. "O' course I can't," he says. "Number one, I don' know meself. Number two, yeh know too much already, so I wouldn' tell yeh if I could. That Stone's here fer a good reason. It was almost stolen outta Gringotts — Is'ppose yeh've worked that out an' all? Beats me how yeh even know abou' Fluffy."

"Oh, come on, Hagrid, you might want to tell us," Hermione begins."But you do know, you know everything that goes on around here," she finishes in a warm, flattering voice. Hagrid's beard twitches and they can tell he is smiling."We only wondered who had done the guarding, really," Hermione continues. "We wondered who Dumbledore had trusted enough to help him, apart from you."

Hagrid's chest swells at the last words and Harry and Ron beam at Hermione, (Y/n) scratching Fang behind the ears.

"Well, I don' s'pose it could hurt ter tell yeh that . . . let's see . . . he borrowed Fluffy from me . . . then some o' the teachers did enchantments . . .Professor Sprout — Professor Flitwick — Professor McGonagall —" he ticks them off on his fingers, "Professor Quirrell — an' Dumbledore himself did somethin', o' course. Hang on, I've forgotten someone. Oh yeah, Professor Snape."

"Snape?" Harry asks.

"Yeah — yer not still on abou' that, are yeh? Look, Snape helped protect the Stone, he's not about ter steal it."

Harry knows Ron and Hermione are thinking the same as he is. If Snape had been in on protecting the Stone, it must have been easy to find out how the other teachers had guarded it. He probably knew everything — except, it seemed, Quirrell's spell and how to get past Fluffy.

"You're the only one who knows how to get past Fluffy, aren't you, Hagrid?" asks Harry anxiously. "And you wouldn't tell anyone, would you? Not even one of the teachers?"

"Not a soul knows except me an' Dumbledore," says Hagrid proudly.

"Well, that's something," Harry mutters to the others, (Y/n) rolling her eyes. "Hagrid, can we have a window open? I'm boiling."

"Can't, Harry, sorry," says Hagrid. (Y/n) notices him glance at the fire, and she looks at it, too.

"Hagrid — what's that?" But she already knows what is. In the very heart of the fire, underneath the kettle, is a huge, black egg. She nudges Fang off her and crouches in front of the fire.

"Ah," says Hagrid, fiddling nervously with his beard, "That's — er . . ."

"Where did you get it, Hagrid?" (Y/n) asks, studying the black egg.

"It must've cost you a fortune," Ron pipes up, crouching beside (Y/n).

"Won it," answers Hagrid. "Las' night. I was down in the village havin' a few drinks an' got into a game o' cards with a stranger. Think he was quite glad ter get rid of it, ter be honest."

"But what are you going to do with it when it's hatched?" wonders Hermione.

"Well, I've bin doin' some readin'," says Hagrid, pulling a large book from under his pillow. "Got this outta the library — Dragon Breeding for Pleasure and Profit — it's a bit outta date, o' course, but it's all in here. Keep the eggi n the fire, 'cause their mothers breathe on 'em, see, an' when it hatches, feed it on a bucket o' brandy mixed with chicken blood every half hour. An' see here — how ter recognize diff'rent eggs — what I got there's a Norwegian Ridgeback. They're rare, them."

Hagrid looks very pleased with himself, but Hermione doesn't look pleased at all. "Hagrid," she exclaims, "you live in a wooden house!" But Hagrid isn't listening. He is humming merrily as he stokes the fire.

. . .

So now they have something else to worry about: what might happen to Hagrid if anyone found out he's hiding an illegal dragon in his hut.

"Wonder what it's like to have a peaceful life," Ron sighs, as evening after evening they struggle through all the extra homework they were getting. Hermione had started making study schedules for Harry and Ron, too. And it was driving them nuts.

Then, one breakfast time, Hedwig brings Harry a note from Hagrid. He had written only two words: It's hatching.

Ron wanted to skip Herbology and go straight down to the hut, but Hermione wouldn't hear of it.

"Hermione, how many times in our lives are we going to see a dragon hatching?" Ron asks.

"We've got lessons, we'll get into trouble, and that's nothing to what Hagrid's going to be in when someone finds out what he's doing -"

"Shut up!" Harry whispers.

Malfoy was only a few feet away and he had stopped dead to listen. (Y/n) turns to give him a glare and the blond scampers off, reminding (Y/n) of a little ferret.

Ron and Hermione argue all the way to Herbology and in the end, she agrees to run down Hagrid's with the other five during morning break. When the bell sounds from the castle at the end of their lesson, the three of them drop their trowels at once and hurry through the grounds to the edge of the forest. Hagrid greet them, looking flushed and excited.

"It's nearly out," Hagrid ushers them inside.

The egg is lying on the table. There are deep cracks in it. Something is moving inside; a funny clicking noise was coming from it.

The five draw their chairs up to the table and watch with bated breath.

All at once there is a scraping noise and the egg splits open. The baby dragon flops onto the table. It isn't exactly pretty, Harry thinks. It's spiny wings are huge compared to it's skinny jet body, it has a long snout with wide nostrils, the stubs of horns and bulging, orange eyes.

It sneezes, a couple of sparks flying out of it's snout.

"Isn't he beautiful?" Hagrid murmurs. He reaches out a hand to stroke the dragon's head. It snaps at his fingers, showing pointed fangs. "Bless him, look, he knows his mummy!" exclaims Hagrid.

"Hagrid," says Hermione, "how fast do Norwegian Ridgebacks grow, exactly?"

Hagrid is about to answer when the color suddenly drained from his face - he leaps to his feet and runs to the window.

"What's the matter?" (Y/n) asks.

"Someone was lookin' through the gap in the curtains - it's a kid - he's runnin' back up ter the school."

(Y/n) bolts to the door and looks out. Even at a distance there is no mistaking him.

Malfoy had seen the dragon.

. . .

Something about the smile lurking on Malfoy's face during the last week made Harry, Ron, Hermione and (Y/n) very nervous. They spend most of their free time in Hagrid's darkened hut, trying to reason with him.

"Just let him go," Harry urges.

"I can't he'll die," Hagrid says. "He's too little."

They look at the dragon. It had grown three times in length in just a week, smoke furling out of its nostrils. Hagrid hadn't been doing his gamekeeping duties because the dragon was keeping him so busy. There are empty brandy bottles and chicken feathers all over the floor.

"I've decided to call him Norbert," says Hagrid, looking at the dragon with misty eyes. "He really knows me now, watch. Norbert! Norbert! Where's Mummy?"

"He's lost his marbles," Ron mutters in Harry's ear.

"Hagrid," says Hermione loudly, "give it two weeks and Norbert's going to be as long as your house. Malfoy could go to Dumbledore at any moment."

Hagrid bites his lip. "I — I know I can't keep him forever, but I can't jus' dump him, I can't."

Harry suddenly turns to Ron."Charlie," he says.

"You're losing it, too," said Ron. "I'm Ron, remember?"

"No — Charlie — your brother, Charlie. In Romania. Studying dragons. We could send Norbert to him. Charlie can take care of him and then put him back in the wild!"

"Brilliant!" exclaims Ron. "How about it, Hagrid?"

And in the end, Hagrid agrees that they could send an owl to Charlie to ask him.

The following week drags by. Wednesday night found Hermione, Harry, and (Y/n) sitting alone in the common room, long after everyone else had gone to bed. The clock on the wall had just chimed midnight when the portrait hole burst open. Ron appears out of nowhere as he pulled off Harry's Invisibility Cloak. He had been down at Hagrid's hut, helping him feed Norbert, who was now eating dead rats by the crate.

"It bit me!" he says, showing them his hand, which was wrapped in a bloody handkerchief. "I'm not going to be able to hold a quill for a week. I tell you, that dragon's the most horrible animal I've ever met, but the way Hagrid goes on about it, you'd think it was a fluffy little bunny rabbit. When it bit me he told me off for frightening it. And when I left, he was singing it a lullaby."

There is a tap on the dark window.

"It's Hedwig!" (Y/n) says, hurrying to let her in. "She'll have Charlie's answer!"

The six of them put their heads together to read the note.

Dear Ron,

How are you? Thanks for the letter — I'd be glad to take the Norwegian Ridgeback, but it won't be easy getting him here. I think the best thing will be to send him over with some friends of mine who are coming to visit me next week. Trouble is, they mustn't be seen carrying an illegal dragon.

Could you get the Ridgeback up the tallest tower at midnight on Saturday? They can meet you there and take him away while it's till dark.

Send me an answer as soon as possible.

Love, Charlie

They look at one another.

"We've got the Invisibility Cloak," says Harry. "It shouldn't be too difficult - I think the cloak's big enough to cover three of us and Norbert."

It was a mark of how bad the last week had been that the other five agree with him. Anything to get rid of Norbert - and Malfoy.

There was a hitch. By the next morning, Ron's bitten hand had swollen to twice its usual size. He didn't know whether it was safe to go to Madam Pomfrey - would she recognize a dragon bite? By the afternoon, though, he had no choice. The cut had turned a nasty shade of green. It looked as if Norbert's fangs were poisonous.

Harry, Hermione, and (Y/n) rush up to the hospital wing at the end of the day to find Ron in a terrible state in bed.

"It's not just my hand," he whispers, "although that feels like it's about to fall off. Malfoy told Madam Pomfrey he wanted to borrow one of my books so he could come and have a good laugh at me. He kept threatening to tell her what really bit me — I've told her it was a dog, but I don't think she believes me — I shouldn't have hit him at the Quidditch match, that's why he's doing this."

The other three try to calm Ron down.

"It'll all be over at midnight on Saturday," says Iliana gently, but this didn't soothe Ron at all. On the contrary, he sits bolt upright and broke into a sweat.

"Midnight on Saturday!" he says in a hoarse voice. "Oh no — oh no —I've just remembered — Charlie's letter was in that book Malfoy took, he's going to know we're getting rid of Norbert."

The others didn't get a chance to answer. Madam Pomfrey came over at that moment and made them leave, saying Ron needed sleep.

. . .

"It's too late to change the plan now," (Y/n) murmurs to the others. "We haven't got time to send Charlie another owl."

"This could be our only chance to get rid of Norbert," Harry adds. "We'll have to risk it, and we have got the Invisibility Cloak, Malfoy doesn't know about that."

They find Fang sitting outside with a bandaged tail when they go to tell Hagrid, who opens a window to talk to them.

(Y/n) crouches beside the large boarhound, scratching behind Fang's ears.

"I won't let you in," Hagrid puffs. "Norbert's at a tricky stage — nothin' I can't handle."

When they tell him about Charlie's letter, his eyes fill with tears, although that might have just been because Norbert had just bitten him on the leg.

"Aargh! It's all right, he only got my boot — jus' playin'— he's only a baby, after all."

The 'baby' bangs its tail on the wall, making the windows rattle. Harry, Hermione, and (Y/n) walk back to the castle, feeling as though Saturday couldn't come quickly enough.

. . .

They would have felt sorry for Hagrid when the time came to say good-bye to Norbert if they hadn't been so worried about what they had to do.

It was a very dark, cloudy night, and they were a bit late arriving at Hagrid's hut because they'd have to wait for Peeves to get out of their way in the entrance hall, where he'd been playing tennis against teh wall.

Hagrid had Norbert packed and ready in a large crate.

"He's got lots o' rats an' some brandy fer the journey," says Hagrid in a muffled voice. "An' I've packed his teddy bear in case he gets lonely."

From inside the crate comes ripping noises that sound to (Y/n) as though the teddy is having his head torn off.

"Bye-bye, Norbert!" Hagrid sobs, as Harry, (Y/n), and Hermione cover the crate with the Invisibility Cloak and step underneath it themselves."Mummy will never forget you!"

How they managed to get the crate back up to the castle, they never knew.Midnight ticks nearer as they heave Norbert up the marble staircase in the entrance hall and along the dark corridors. Up another staircase, then another— even one of Harry's shortcuts didn't make the work much easier.

"Nearly there!" Harry pants as they reach the corridor beneath the tallest tower.

Then a sudden movement ahead of them makes them almost drop the crate. Forgetting that they were already invisible, they shrink into the shadows, staring at the dark outlines of two people grappling with each other, ten feet away.

A lamp flares.

Professor McGonagall, in a tartan bathrobe and a hair net, has Malfoy by the ear. "Detention!" she shouts. "And twenty points from Slytherin! Wandering around in the middle of the night, how dare you —"

"You don't understand, Professor. Harry Potter and (Y/n) (L/n) are coming — they've got a dragon!"

"What utter rubbish! How dare you tell such lies! Come on - I shall see Professor Snape about you, Malfoy!"

The steep spiral staircase up to the top of the tower seems the easiest thing in the world after that. Not until they'd stepped out into the cold night air, did they throw off the Cloak, glad to be able do breathe properly again. Hermione does a sort of jig.

"Malfoy's got detention! I could sing!"

"Don't," (Y/n) smiles warmly at her sister. "You know that's my thing."

Chuckling about Malfoy, they wait, Norbert thrashing about in his crate. About ten minutes later, four broomsticks come swooping down out of the darkness.

Charlie's friends were a cheery lot. They show Harry, Hermione, and (Y/n) the harness they'd rigged up, so they could suspend Norbert between them. They all help buckle Norbert safely into it and then Harry, (Y/n), and Hermione shake hands with the others and thank them very much.

At last, Norbert was going . . . going . . . gone.

Harry and Hermione slip back down the spiral staircase and (Y/n) grabs the Invisibility Cloak. She darts down the stairs when she hears a noise coming from the end of the hall and throws the Cloak over Harry and Hermione.

As the figure steps out, Filch's have looms suddenly out of the darkness. "Well, well, well," he leers at (Y/n). "You are in trouble, aren't you.

Harry and Hermione watch in shock and horror as Filch grabs (Y/n)'s upper arm and begins dragging her down the corridor.

Word Count: 3574 words

#hermione granger x sister reader

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corvidkittytransboy · 4 years

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terato meme: 💀👻😈-x

💀 - Who was the first monster you ever fell for?

it took me a bit to think of this one (i didnt have and still basically dont have any celebrity crushes cause im like, actually a complicated type of grey-asexual while being a complicated mostly mlm bi? Basically I dont get attracted to individuals. Theres a meme thats the no give only throw dog but instead its “want sex” “with who” “no who only sex” and thats the mood basically. Though its more of an anyone than a no one thing. ANYWAY THIS ISNT WHAT YOU ASKED ME ABOUT) Upon thinking about it, I think it was probably Wulf from Danny Phantom cause werewolves sexy

👻 - What’s your ideal monster lover like?

I’m not too picky, I’m a fan of a LOT of different kinds of monsters from like, inhuman tentacle beings with eyes and mouths in all the wrong places all the way down to normal-ass vampires which dont really count as monsters but whatever. I want something with big wings to shield me, and big claws for ripping right through clothes, sharp teeth for leaving marks so everyone knows whoever, or whatever, is fucking me isn’t human. Definitely a fantastical cock, certainly with a knot, maybe prehensile or barbed or some other kind of fun texture (ribbed? Big ridges? I’m not picky) Maybe fluffy? I’m thinking maybe a mothman type of thing here, big fluffy strong cryptid who can take me flying and pin me to a wall and be super rough with an inhumanly sized and shaped cock.

😈 - Share a monster related fantasy~

hmmm, I already talked about the cyclical breeding thing, where something very inhuman impregnates me with something that the moment its out leaves behind another one to grow inside me, leaving me constantly either bred by it or about to be.

Sooooo lets talk about good old werewolf fantasies. I LOVE the idea of heat and monsters going into rut and needing to breed and also I had this idea that ive probably seen somewhere before but still i love it, the kind of werewolf where you lose control when you transform, but instead of bloodlust being the driving force for everything, it’s just normal lust. You’re a werewolf but every time you change you change into a needy slut in heat.

Anyway that hasn’t happened YET in this fantasy, but it will in time. First though the first werewolf has to find me in the woods while he’s in rut. He can smell the fact that I have a fertile cunt between my legs even though to all outward appearances I’m just a pretty short guy. The nose doesn’t lie though, and he can tell I can satisfy his needs for the coming rut (which could last a day or a week or a month or more, a couple days to a week sounds about right though) there’s absolutely nothing I could have possibly done to stop the werewolf from taking me once he’s decided I’ll make a good mate, but I still try to run, absolutely terrified that this huge beast might want to eat me, but when he easily overtakes me and I’m trapped beneath his weight, he keeps from scratching me too bad and just rips my clothes off instead. I see his cock slip out and point right at me and I realize what he wants with me.

I try to beg him to get off, cause he’s massive and there’s no WAY that’s going to fit inside me, especially not if as I suspect, he’s got a knot. Unfortunately he’s not taking no for an answer, and he’s strong enough to MAKE it fit, so he does. It’s once I’m knotted and my womb is so full of cum it’s starting to stretch my belly a little that he finally bites me, marking me as his mate and forcing me to transform into the perfect mate for him, the outward changes of this kind of transformation a lot less useful in terms of power and a lot more internal as my womb becomes ready to bear werewolf pups for him and the hormones of heat start to take over my mind. I get taken back to his den and used like that for a week, dropping in and out of that haze of lust, sometimes coming back to myself enough to scream and struggle, but often staying docile and moaning beneath my huge werewolf lover.

#from the crowkitty #hornyanon #askmemes #i am very much a monsterfucker #and these were fun to answer!#Anonymous

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hybridfanfiction · 5 years

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Heart Hunter - One

Pairing: Peregrine Falcon hybrid Minseok x Deer Hybrid Reader

Word Count: 1,469

Summary: The government has officially outlawed prey hybrids, leaving your herd with no choice but to escape into the depths of the forest. Since none of you have been outside of the city before, you soon find yourselves struggling - until you start finding food waiting on your porch every morning. But where is it coming from?

❧

The newscaster is explaining in great detail what the newest proposal from the President means without a shred of shock or sympathy painting his stoic expression. All breeding of prey hybrids were to cease immediately. The government had been pushing more and more against hybrids, using claims of massive overpopulation and crime rates to scare the human community. After years of debating over what to do, they’d apparently settled on announcing that prey hybrids were considered unnecessary.

You suppose it makes a twisted sort of sense. Wolves, bears, and big cats make up the bulk of the military and police forces. Even the domestic dog and cat breeds would be safe, as most of the people in power had one as a companion. Rabbits would most likely continue to be bred for black markets, considering that they were used for exactly what you would think they were, poor bunnies. However, deer and rodents, most birds and even more like them would die out.

You shut the massive tv off and throw the remote across the elaborately decorated room, shivering in both anger and fear because unfortunately for you and your family, you were prey.

Deer hybrids were bred for their gentle grace and beauty, making them ideal as dancers and other various forms of entertainment roles such as modeling or acting. Your own family had been with your owner’s for several generations, bred and trained exclusively for ballet. Hybrids were never allowed to become principals - due to the damage that would have on the human ego - but Madame’s family had still produced the finest soloists in history. You were soon to follow in your parent’s footsteps, as Madame had been hinting that your days as one of the coryphées were nearly over.

You knew that you had it better than many hybrids. Your owner and your mother had grown up side by side and Madame spoiled her, even going so far as to buy your father from his owner once the two had fallen in love. Such generosity was unheard of for their kind, as does were usually mated with bucks of good breeding for staggering amounts of money regardless of feelings. Lucky for your mother she had fallen for someone that came from decent enough stock for the elite snobs to overlook, and he was an exceptional dancer. The two were as madly in love as ever and were the best of parents to you and your brother. You were always grateful that you knew when the time came Madame would do no less for you. However, it didn’t matter now, as you were apparently doomed to remain unmated and childless under the new law. Madame’s legacy of producing the finest dancers in the country would be no more.

You sigh morosely and walk to the kitchen to finish preparing your simple meal. Your parents and Madame were still at the studio and you had told the cook that you would be fine on your own. You weren’t sure where your brother was, but Luhan had been disappearing quite a lot recently, so you weren’t too concerned. Since it was only you eating you were only going to make something small. You weren’t that hungry anyway, considering how upset you were, so you settled on a tray of fruits and veggies. You couldn’t cook, but you could handle taking things from containers and placing them on a tray, at least.

As you nibbled on some veggie sticks you contemplated your new fate. Your mother had always told you that you had a romantic soul, and you’d never bothered to argue because you knew it was true. You had grown up surrounded by dancing and music that were tales of grand love and had your own parent's still strong relationship to back it all up. You had always planned on having a loving family just like them and had wondered what your future mate would be like. No doubt they would be a deer hybrid like you, perhaps even another dancer. Then you could dance together in the living room like Mama and Papa did all the time.

Except all of your daydreams of love and happiness were floating away like wisps in the wind. No mate. No fawns of your own. Just a bleak future of dancing until your body fails you and you become worthless. Worthless to Madame and worthless to the world.

You had been so lost in your melancholy thoughts that you hadn’t heard anyone come home until suddenly you heard Madame screaming for you, your parent's voices soon doing the same. You get up and follow the sounds into the living room where the three of them are frantically grabbing suitcases from the hall closet. All of them look harried and wild-eyed, your father’s face stony while both Mama and Madame were crying.

Mama saw you first, crying out as she rushed to you and held you in a crushing grip. “Oh, my baby! You’re okay.”

“What’s going on?” You ask as you awkwardly pat Mama’s back.

Papa was nearly growling, a strange sound that you’d never heard him make before. “It’s your brother. They took him. They took my damn boy.”

“I’ll do everything to get him back, I promise you.” Madame sniffled, bringing a lacy handkerchief to her eyes before she gazed at you with heartbreak in her eyes.

“They aren’t just banning breeding of prey hybrids, they are eliminating them. I’ve been hearing rumors for weeks about hybrids going missing, but I never would have suspected this.” Tears continue to fall down Madame’s face as she pulls your sobbing mother into her arms.

“Hybrids are being taken to a military facility where they are either killed outright or used in whatever sick way they want to. A peacock hybrid came to me a little while ago. He and Luhan were picked up earlier today. Luhan helped him escape but wasn’t able to get away himself. He told the peacock to come straight here and warn us that they know about the rest of you and are coming for you next. We need to get you away.”

“Away? We can’t just leave Luhan!” You push away the shock and disgust over what's happening in favor of concern for your brother.

“There’s nothing you can do. I, however, still have plenty of connections and money. I will abuse them all to get my sweet Lulu out of there. Meanwhile, I still have Pépère’s cabin that I never use. I don’t even think it’s listed anywhere, so there should be no way for anyone to find you. It’s a bit rustic, but I have faith in you, my dears. I will do all I can and come for you when it’s safe,” Madame pushes Mama and Papa towards the stairs as you follow behind.

“Go and pack, ma bichette. Only one suitcase, so take your most treasured and essential items. We must leave as quickly as possible.” She pushes you up the stairs as well, patting your cheek lightly before heading towards the kitchen. “I will put together some food. Goodness, I don’t even know what sort of things we have in the pantry.”

Disbelief and horror have you shaking as you walk to your room and find a single suitcase waiting for you on your bed. You take in the elaborately decorated room, realizing that it might be the last time you ever saw it. Madame had been so thrilled when they’d learned your mother was having a girl and it showed in the room that was fit for a princess. Or a ballerina, of course.

Your canopied bed was massive and covered in ruffled pink and gold silk. The color scheme continued throughout the entire room - from the pink and gold vanity covered in products to the lush carpets on the marble floor. One of your walls even had a full mirror and barre so you could practice in privacy. There were trophies and ribbons from your various competitions, signed posters from shows you’ve seen, and pictures of friends and family everywhere. You’ve been in this room since the day you were born and now you had to fit a lifetime of memories into a single suitcase.

Tears fell as you slowly pack your suitcase. You wept for your family. For your poor brother who hopefully wasn’t suffering too much. For Mama and Papa. For Madame. For the little girl that had grown up in this room whose dreams and hopes for her future were dead.

❧

AN: I had planned on this just being a one-shot, but it got really long and complicated, so now it’s becoming a series! I’ve already got most of it written and now I’m just working on breaking them up in appropriate chapters and adding bits here and there. PLEASE let me know what you think, what theories you have, or any ideas for future fics! I love to hear from you guys and I really really hope you like this one!

#exo #exo fanfic #hybrid!exo #hybrid!minseok #kim minseok #minseok #hybrid #hybrid au #hybrids #hybrid fanfiction #kpop #au #hybrid minseok #hybrid exo

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f-nodragonart · 5 years

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Alphas and Hive Minds

HTTYD and now Godzilla:KOM have done me too dirty on this topic, I HAVE to rectify this

so let’s break this down

“alphas” are a very human-centric concept (and more arguably, a specifically capitalistic concept), and aren’t typically present in nature in the ways we expect them to be, if at ALL

“dominance” is at best a fluid concept that can sometimes help map out relationships b/t individuals under certain contexts, but it’s NOT an inherent trait. here’s a quote from an excellent article on the subject, PLEASE go read the whole thing:

You can’t really say ‘an animal is dominant’ in the same way that you can’t say ‘an animal is chasing.’ Who is that animal chasing, and who is that animal dominant in relation to?

While there are many hazy definitions of the word dominance in the current scientific literature, the most accepted one that I have seen is that dominance is a factor of a relationship between two individuals regarding control of resources. In this relationship, the submissive individual will allow the dominant individual to have the resource. Theoretically.

What dominance is NOT is a character trait. No animal is born “the alpha.” Studies of wolves in captivity and in the wild have shown that the fact that an individual is the highest-ranking member of one pack has little to no bearing on the animal’s rank if it moves to a new pack. Similarly, studies of parent-raised canids have found that no stable hierarchy forms in litters of pups. And finally, dominance relationships are often based off of the result of a single fight; if two individuals are evenly matched it can be a more or less random conclusion.

as this article goes on to explain, wild wolves typically live in “nuclear families”, so what we perceive as the “alpha couple” is actually just the parental unit to the kids who have yet to leave the nest and start their own families. anything approaching “Alpha/Beta/Omega” among wolves has mostly been observed in captive situations, where a bunch of random wolves are thrown together and forced to navigate their environment together-- it’s uncomfortable for everyone involved

now this isn’t to say that wild animals are NEVER hierarchical-- ranking is useful when dealing with large groups of individuals. however, these hierarchies are generally more complicated than a simple “perfect ladder” concept (again, from the same article):

Figure redrawn from Bradshaw, Blackwell, and Casey, 2009. Dashed lines between pairs indicate no clear dominant individual despite multiple interactions. No line between a pair indicates that the pair rarely interacted.

(while not necessarily an example of wild animal hierarchy since this is mapping out relationships within a group of shelter dogs, it’s a good example of the complexities of larger group relationships)

and one last important quote from that article, relating to submission (seriously, read the whole thing):

So much of the literature focuses on agonistic behavior, yet agonistic behavior is far, far rarer in wild canids than submissive behavior is. In nuclear wolf families, aggression is almost nonexistent.

The word ‘submissive’ has a negative connotation. It suggests a loss of power, a humbling, a subjugation. It might be better to remove it as a label for certain types of canid behavior, in that case. Canids don’t demand submissive behavior from one another, they offer it. Muzzle-biting in wolves, which seems fierce, is usually solicited from the animal being bitten- several times in a row. Far from the popularized “alpha roll,” canids rarely force each other to roll over- they use rolling over as an invitation to play or a plea for affection. This type of affiliative, cohesive behavior makes up the vast majority of all social behavior in canid groups.

A wag of the tail and an open, panting mouth is called submissive by the literature, but in that case, so is a human smile.

while this article focuses on canids, there are plenty of examples of wild groups of animals w/ some sort of ranking/hierarchy (including non-predatory animals!), just be mindful of the sources u look into. even scientific sources could have a bias based on the researcher’s personal social background

even if we ARE treating dominance as an actual trait, or creating a ‘perfect ladder’ hierarchy, there’s a BIG difference between asserting dominance via size/strength/pheromones/etc. vs. straight-up mind-controlling a group to do ur bidding. however, mind-control is unfortunately how most “alpha” media seems to frame dominance, which is simply not even POSSIBLE in nature, as far as we know

this is where we see botched attempts at “hivemind”, which isn’t even present in the hives we associate it with. here’s a post that breaks down social insects RLY well (which I recommend reading in full), but for the sake of this post, I’ll just quote some important sections:

If you think of a social insect colony as a superorganism, which it’s useful to do in many cases, different groups of insects within the colony act like organs. One caste protects the colony from invaders, which is like an immune system. One caste scouts for new places to forage, which is like a sensory system. Generally, science fiction has a good grip on this idea. Where sci-fi authors fail is that they think the queen is the brain of this superorganism. She is not. She is the reproductive system. The queen does not control what happens in the hive any more than your reproductive system controls what happens in your body. (Which is to say, she has some influence, but she is not the brains of the operation.)

~~~

Now, I’ve already told you that the queen is not the brain of the hive. So where is the brain? Well, that is exactly the point of swarm intelligence. The brain does not reside in one particular animal. It’s an emergent property of many animals working together. A colony is not like your body, where your brain sends an impulse to your mouth telling it to move, and it moves. It’s more like when two big groups of people are walking toward each other, and they spontaneously organize themselves into lanes so no one has a collision (x). There’s no leader telling them to do that, but they do it anyway.

Much of the efficiency of social insect colonies comes from very simple behavioral rules (x). Hymenopterans, the group of insects that includes ants, bees, and wasps, have a behavioral rule: work on a task until it is completed, and when it is done, switch to a different task.

~~~

The existential terror of the hive mind in science fiction comes from the loss of the self. The idea is that in a social insect colony, there is no individual, but one whole, united to one purpose. No dissent, disagreement, or conflicting interests occur, just total lockstep. I totally get why that’s scary.

The thing is, it’s just not true of real social insects. There is conflict within colonies all the time, up to and including civil war.

~~~

Here’s what I find weird about depictions of social insects in science fiction. They are portrayed as utterly alien, Other, and horrifying. Yet humans and social insects are very, very similar. The famous sociobiologists E.O. Wilson and Bernard Crespi have both described humans as chimpanzees that took on the lifestyle of ants.

and even worse than a false attempt at hivemind among just one species, “hivemind alphas” in popular media are often shown to control an array of completely separate species! as if all these diverse, uniquely-evolved creatures answer to the same, single power!

"but what if I want to KEEP alphas/hivemind? is there a way to do it ‘right?’”

well, there might just be! here are a few ways I’ve thought of

1) integrate “dominance as a trait” into reasonable caste systems and/or hierarchies

sure, something like “dominance” could theoretically be an inherent trait under certain circumstances, but what would that MEAN for the species this occurs in? this sort of system would evolve for a REASON, so what purpose do castes with different levels of “dominance” serve to the overall community?

does dominance correlate to a certain set of tasks (IE-- alphas fight and protect, omegas gather/grow/prepare food)? or is this simply a way to better keep the peace among a huge group of individuals that would otherwise in-fight too much if there weren’t any genetically-predetermined parameters in place (and if this is the case, what kind of tumultuous relationships must this species have that they wouldn’t be able to solve these issues thru social interaction)? or maybe this is a purely reproductive strategy, and there are either several different sexes based around dominance, or different castes within sexes that perform different sexual/social roles depending on population and breeding season (and if so, how does dominance factor into these reproductive strategies)?

for as much flack as the genre gets, there are a lot of ABO/omegaverse fics that actually do rly cool worldbuilding w/ the concept of “dominance as a trait” and/or genetically-predetermined castes, so I know it can work lmao

2) lean HEAVY into exploring autonomy/individuality and mind control

if u want an alpha that can override the autonomy of others, then don’t shy away from the full implications of that

what does it mean for this society if one single creature can override individual autonomy? what does this level of control mean for individuality-- if that’s even a concept that exists for these creatures? do individuals feel any particular way about their lack of true autonomy-- are they relieved to not be under the pressure of having to making decisions themselves? maybe they even feel that individuality is a psychological death-sentence-- after all, what is anxiety if not the existential dread of individuality?

are alphas born into this position of mental control, or do mentally strong individuals battle for it? if this is the case, are alphas the only ones that could be considered truly autonomous individuals? or perhaps alphas are more of the mouthpiece for the collective consciousness of their community, so their opinions and feelings shift to reflect the average consensus of their community?

if a single creature can control individuals across a wide area (such as across an entire planet), how do they do it? do they have far-spreading pheromones, a loud call, or do they use second-tier individuals to exert their control? or are all individual members of the community connected into a complex neural network? is this network so intimate as to connect all individuals in a mental web that can be tapped into at any moment, despite distance? what can transfer across this network-- complex thoughts/language, visuals, or just emotional suggestions?

also, please think deeply about how far-reaching an alpha’s control is in your world. sure, perhaps a complex neural network evolved early on enough that all of a planet’s species fall under the control of this neural umbrella, but that’s prettyyyy unlikely. a much smaller taxa level makes more sense, like just a species. this species may still be the dominant species of a given planet, but their alphas aren’t controlling EVERYTHING on that planet-- it would be FAR too much effort to control every little ecological system. or at the very least, the control exerted beyond an alpha’s own species would be very weak compared to the full control they exert over their own-- perhaps they can only implant suggestions or telepathically communicate w/ other species?

though just because the alpha’s community consists of a single species doesn’t mean there can’t be diversity-- social insects like ants and bees are a great example of specialized tasks leading to diverse morphology among a species’ castes

3) the society is actually a TRUE superorganism of systems with a leading “brain”

are there even any separate individuals in this world, or is the “alpha” in fact the ‘brain’, and all other ‘individuals’ are their various limbs and organs? real-life hives/colonies without a “brain” allow for highly-efficient, decentralized coordination among as many as thousands of individuals, so what is the advantage of a ‘single’-organism society setup with a single “brain”?

this is a great route to go if u rly RLY want a multi-species hivemind, b/c u could make the base organism a parasite-- cordyceps fungi, anyone? parasites still tend to be species/clade-specific, but at least this physical conduit makes more sense for a multi-species hivemind

-Mod Spiral

#/outs myself as an abo fan to make a point/ anyways #mod spiral #behavior #alphas #hiveminds

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meepface · 6 years

Text

i’m avoiding an essay

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

it was my girlfriend so that would be very nice

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

we are daaaating and we might get some time to hang out after classes tomorrow so i’m really looking forward to that

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

as long as it’s not anything bad

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

yes

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

sober

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

yes

7. What does your last received text say?

“i’m having a day. how’s your day been?”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

sooooo many

9. Where was your last kiss at?

in my car in a parking lot right outside of campus

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

i don’t have a sister but i saw my brother like 20 mins ago

11. What do you drink in the morning?

water, coffee, milk, mostly coffee

12. Where did you sleep last night?

my bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

they shouldn’t be but they definitely require effort, but the effort is worth it so it still shouldn’t be hard??

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

nah, i don’t see a point in it. everything happens for a reason

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

nope that would be nice bc we’d finally have some fuckin time to ourselves

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

rainy but only if i have company and something to do

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

yes it’s a very common middle name

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

jeans

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

i hope so yes

20. Does anyone like you?

yes i’d hope my girlfriend does

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

nope

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

yes lmfaooo

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

yep

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

i have three lmfao i’ve more than just considered it

25. In the past week have you cried?

yuhhh i cried yesterday

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

my lil dog Rusty is a pomeranian mix

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

in ??

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

29. Do you think you’re old?

30. Do you like text messaging?

yeah

31. What type of day are you having?

i’m really tired and i’ve felt sick but otherwise it’s been a really nice day

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

yes lmao

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

cold

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

yes there’s a few

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

relationship

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

i try to be simple but i always complicate shit lmao so

37. What song are you listening to?

i’m not listening to music but i do have make daddy proud by blackbear stuck in my head lmfao

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

yes

39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

yes pretty much

40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

she’s really funny and sweet and has a cute laugh and she’s so pretty and dorky and she was also one of my only gay friends in high school lmfao and we bonded so hard over that. i felt like it was only a matter of time that we got together

41. When did you last receive a text message?

9:57 pm but i haven’t texted anyone back since lmao

42. What is wrong with you right now?

i mean generally speaking there’s a lot going on but just currently i am feeling very sick and sleepy and i should probably work on my essay lmao

43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

very very well she’s my girlfriend

44. Does anyone disgust you?

yep

45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

no i have a girlfriend

46. Are you in a good mood right now?

yes

47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?

my brother

48. What color shirt are you wearing?

grey

49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

yes

50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

yes

51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

no i am dating her

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

yes

53. Do you like rain?

yes as long as i have company and something to do or else i get depressoooo

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

nope as long as she’s safe

55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

yes

56. Do you like to cuddle?

yessssss so much

57. Are you shy?

not shy just introverted

58. Do you get along with girls?

yes!!! i love girls

59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

yes

60. What do you carry with you at all times?

chapstick, my phone, medicine bc a bitch gets migraines all the damn time

61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

as long as i had company

62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

yes lmao?? i already have

63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

yes

64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

yes but she’s short so that would be a struggle for her

65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

yes my gf and i finally got to go out since we’ve both been busy as hell and it was so nice

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

i have only ever kissed my gf and she is 20

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?

pay bc i am bad at it lmfao

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?

leopard

69. Do you have any stickers on your car?

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?

neither

71. Blackberry, Android, or iPhone?

iphone

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?

it’s been months lmao

73. Do you like diet soda?

no (sorry Caitlin)

74. What color are the walls in your room?

one is brown and the others are a bright blue

75. Are you 16 or older?

yes

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?

77. Do you have a job?

yes

78. What are your initials?

ENM

79. Did you ever have braces?

yes....... don’t remind me i wanted to kill myself when i had them i was so ugly lol! anyway

80. Are you from the south?

yes unfortunately

81. What does your last status on facebook say?

i shared this bc it made me laugh so hard that i was crying

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?

yes

83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?

my mom

84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?

gymnastics

85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?

damn idk, It i think

86. Do you smoke?

87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?

heels

88. Is your phone touch screen?

yes

89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?

straight

90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?

yes

91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?

river

92. Have you ever made out in a car?

yes all the time lmao

93. …Had sex in a car?

yes lmfao

94. Are you single or in a relationship?

in a relationship

95. What were you doing last night at midnight?

i was talking to my gf and playing animal crossing pocket camp lol

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?

i haven’t gone out to see them in like a year

97. Do you like the camera on your phone?

yes it’s nice

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?

yes

99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?

100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?

yes

101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?

nope i’m gay

102. Name your favorite Kesha song:

praying is good also kiss n tell used to be one of my favorites

103. Do you have any tan lines right now?

nope i don’t tan

104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?

absolutely not

#like if ya read #long post #about me

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techspotguruji · 4 years

Text

The Good, the Bad and House Passes Bill Making Animal Cruelty a Federal Felony

A History of House Passes Bill Making Animal Cruelty a Federal Felony Refuted

America's horses aren't food animals and aren't regulated as such. In respect to cosmetics, rabbits are the most frequently used animals for animal testing. In doing this, you could save yourself an animal's life. Animals are abused daily, in many unique forms, all around the world, and it needs to stop. At the exact same time, finding the most suitable pet to bring home isn't always a simple task. Usually, as soon as a dog is in a public location, the owner must be in charge of the dog on a leash that's six feet or less. With just a little effort, you can discover every breed at shelters, or you are able to search for a breed-specific rescue group. Animal cruelty is getting increasingly more prevalent today. It is one of them. If you were charged with animal cruelty, thus, it's essential to get in touch with a criminal defence lawyer when possible to talk about your defence. Animal cruelty, together with DUI law is likely to make your case complicated. Since you may see, domestic violence is related to animal abuse and vice versa. Animal abuse should be treated as a severe crime. Consequently, the victim stays in the situation to safeguard their companion. There's no law banning using such ingredients. Unfortunately, many internet collections of statutes aren't kept updated. So when you locate a statute that appears to tackle your situation, you could need to take the next step and see what the courts have required in order to say about doing it. The laws differ from felony statutes to misdemeanour statutes, and a few of them have been on the books for more than a century. Also, consider there are animal cruelty laws in place that could bring about jail time for offenders. State-by-state, the laws are somewhat different. Since there are minimal laws protecting against animal testing in the USA, companies are totally free to check their goods on whatever they please. The legislation comprises exceptions for hunting. What are now accepted as a significant animal welfare legislation isn't good enough? The bill would also mandate that an industrial breeder must offer each dog with food at minimum once per day and each dog must be given with potable water that isn't frozen and does not have any debris, faeces, algae and other contaminants. It is essential to allow the bill to be passed to the committee stage for additional deliberations. The bill earned 284 bipartisan co-sponsors and over 200 law enforcement endorsements in the previous session of Congress, as stated by the group.

House Passes Bill Making Animal Cruelty a Federal Felony Help!

To learn the individual rights and duties, you have as a dog owner contact your neighbourhood animal control agency. Some insurance providers are additionally not insuring homeowners with certain breeds. A number of other businesses are listed on the world wide web, and I encourage you to click the hyperlink to find a complete collection of offenders. There are large organizations that are known for sharing ideas and intend to switch the notion of animal cruelty. Importantly, there's unequivocal and broad support for such a change among the general public. So, it is a struggle locating a location in their opinion.

Want to Know More About House Passes Bill Making Animal Cruelty a Federal Felony?

Folks must take a stand in the struggle for preventing cruelty to animals. You see a good deal of people who have been kicked from a lot of places, and the system doesn't understand what things to do with them, said Bernie Hart. In hot climates like mine, the dog ought to be inside a lot of the time anyway, as it's far too hot outside. If you're interested in a particular area of the law (for instance, small claims court procedures), you have to read all relevant statutes on this subject. It's certainly possible that farmers in your nearby region are utilizing theses harmful conventional strategies. However, it's much simpler to learn the way your food is produced as soon as you can speak with the farmer at the local market, or even better, schedule a trip to the source.

The Death of House Passes Bill Making Animal Cruelty a Federal Felony

When you begin buying local produce, you may discover a few odd-shaped vegetables, but they're all grown with taste, first of all, in mind. To make sure your food is fresh, make an effort to purchase as much food as possible from local farms. Eating locally will set you in contact with the seasons and connect you to your region with the additional advantage of eating produce when it's in its peak. Read the full article

#HousePassesBillMakingAnimalCrueltyaFederalFelony

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honeyheartangel · 7 years

Text

I just answered them all bc I was bored

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? YESSSSSSS GODDDDDDD 2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed? LMAOOOOO NOTHING 3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? ya lmao 4. Is your last name longer than six letters? .....yes (had to think about it) 5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? Completely and unfortunately sober 6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? No......she messed up lmao 7. What does your last received text say? Let's Not 8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? Like 3 WOW three too many 9. Where was your last kiss at? ....the parking lot of an outback steakhouse 10. When is the last time you saw your sister? Last week 11. What do you drink in the morning? Water bc I'm taking my pills 12. Where did you sleep last night? In. My. Bed 13. Do you think relationships are hard? No. Wait yes. Wait no 14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? I'd probably un-attend my dad's wedding lmao 15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? BITCH FUCK YOU lmao 16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? Depends on my mood. Probably sunny tho 17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? So many ppl 18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? None of the above ;) 19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? I pray to gronk everyday that I will be lol 20. Does anyone like you? I sure hope at least one (1) person does 21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? Not...yet ;) 22. Is the last person you kissed gay? Yes 23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? Ben Roethlisberger 24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? Always but I'm a chicken 25. In the past week have you cried? More like in the last 12 hours lol 26. What breed was the last dog you saw? Hmmm. I don't know what kind of dog I saw earlier but she was pretty 27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? Out of? Wtf? 28. Have you ever kissed a football player? Only in my dreams 29. Do you think you’re old? Not at all 30. Do you like text messaging? Not really lmao 31. What type of day are you having? EHHHH it got better 32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? Yes 33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? Cold cold cold cold 34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? Can't say that there is lmao 35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? Relationship 36. Are you a simple or complicated person? HAHAHA complicated .-. 37. What song are you listening to? (One of those) crazy girls- paramore 38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? Yes 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? Yes 40. What made you start liking the person you like now? Almost everything 41. When did you last receive a text message? Like 2 sec ago 42. What is wrong with you right now? I hate my dad also I'm fat why what's up 43. How well do you know the last female you texted? Very well I hope 44. Does anyone disgust you? Donald trump 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? Only if it was my gf 46. Are you in a good mood right now? I guess. It's hard to tell 47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? My mummy 48. What color shirt are you wearing? Red 49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? No 50. Anyone you’re giving up on? Yes 51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? No we're great friends :) 52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? I have yes.. 53. Do you like rain? Yes :) 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? No 55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? ..........!!!! I just realized I haven't that's sooooooooo wildddddd 56. Do you like to cuddle? I don't know I've never done it 57. Are you shy? No 58. Do you get along with girls? So well, I love girls 59. Have you dated the person you texted last? Yes 60. What do you carry with you at all times? My pocket knife 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? Fuck that, ghosts are angry 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? I know for a fact I can 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? No 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? YeS 65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? Haha yeah :) 66. How old are the last three people you kissed? ....I can't keep those kinds of tabs anyway 2 are 21 and one is 20 67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? Do them myself, salons are a scam 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? Zebra! 69. Do you have any stickers on your car? No :( 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? ...god neither 71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? TEAM IPHONE 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? like 4 months ago 73. Do you like diet soda? I do actually but I don't let myself drink it 74. What color are the walls in your room? White 75. Are you 16 or older? Ya 76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? Not anymore, Satan freed me 77. Do you have a job? Yes? No? Kind of both 78. What are your initials? LC 79. Did you ever have braces? no thank gronk 80. Are you from the south? No thank gronk 81. What does your last status on facebook say? God I'm not going back there 82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? No 83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? MOM MOM MOM 84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? No 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? Ummmmmm atomic blonde! 86. Do you smoke? No 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? Flops 88. Is your phone touch screen? Yes 89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? Straight 90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? No lmao 91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? River tbh 92. Have you ever made out in a car? No 93. …Had sex in a car? No 94. Are you single or in a relationship? Taken 💖 95. What were you doing last night at midnight? Probably watching QVC 96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? July 4th 97. Do you like the camera on your phone? Yes yes yes 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? Yes lmao 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? Nope 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? No 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? No thank god for virginity 102. Name your favorite Kesha song: Your love is my drug 103. Do you have any tan lines right now? Yes 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? Honestly....yes

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princeyandanxiety · 7 years

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The "ask me things" ask - all of them!!! Or if that's too insane, do the first 20 and the last 20 :p

The answers are short bc i was rushing them haha but ill put em under the read more

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

… I would be very, very freaked out. Words would not be said. Only screaming.

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

I saw him last month. No offense, but he cannot write a decent speech.

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

Depending on the drug, it’d vary from “please just make sure you’re safe” to “oh god how do i convince you that this is a bad idea [panicky pharmacist daughter vibrating]”

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

[counts letters on fingers] yes!

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

Sober.

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyep

7. What does your last received text say?

“Ok, see you next week. Thanks. :)”8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

Once.

9. Where was your last kiss at?

Kindergarten classroom. In my primary school.

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

[checks time] uh like an hour ago?

11. What do you drink in the morning?

Water or cinnamon orange tea

12. Where did you sleep last night?

My bed.

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

They’re a lot of work, but they’re ultimately a choice that both people have to make. I’d like to hope that they’re ultimately worth it.

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

Mostly test results.

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

“Oh, hey, we haven’t talked in like 6 years. How’s life?”

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

Sunny.

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

Lmao fuck no.

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

Pj pants!

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

Yes. Because I’ll have finished my HSC.

20. Does anyone like you?

Yes ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

No. Only an A, a T, and another A.

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

[shrugs[

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

There are multiple. Be more specific.

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

Yeah but I’m a fucking wuss haha I’d probs pass out from the pain or something.

25. In the past week have you cried?

I cried like 9 hours ago lmao

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

TOY POODLE!

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

Who the fuck dries themself in the shower? It’s all watery in there. Foot mats exist for a reason.

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

nnnnnnnnnnnnnope

29. Do you think you’re old?

Sometimes i feel a little old, but I know that I’m still pretty damn young

30. Do you like text messaging?

Lmao I prefer it to calling that’s for damn sure. I dont actually text all that much tho. Mostly because the people i’d text have free messenger services anyway. That or the bill for texting them would be pretty fuckin pricey.

31. What type of day are you having?

It’s on the better side of neutral.

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

Nooooo thanks. I got my ears pieced when I was like 3 and that was enough for me!

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

Mildly cold weather.

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

Yes! He’s been my friend since kindergarten haha

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

relationship because i am a massive romantic (whICH REMINDS ME-)

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

Is anyone actually simple? Like really? There are always so many different parts to one person, so many intricacies and contradictions, good and bad, that they might not even think about.

… so im probably a more complicated person haha.

37. What song are you listening to?

Nice2KnoU by All Time Low i love it sooooo muuuuuuch38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

Most of the time, yeah.

39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?Ooooooh yeah. They probably have the most power to wreck me lmao.

40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

Okay in my defense I didn’t realise I actually liked them until my brain was like “lmao what if you had a crush on this person” and I was like “oh. oh fuck. I actually do have a crush on them” but i think it was a few things. they always make me smile, and they don’t mind that i can be a clingy motherfucker. They’re also funny and super sweet, and they have such an amazing mind and personality. Tbh im not entirely surprised that i fell for them because when i click with someone as well as i initially did with them i tend to develop feelings pretty quickly from there.

41. When did you last receive a text message?5:14 pm

42. What is wrong with you right now?Do you have the time to hear the answer to that?

43. How well do you know the last female you texted?Eh. She’s a teacher.

44. Does anyone disgust you?

Yes.45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?Unfortunately, no, probably not.

46. Are you in a good mood right now?{come back to this}

47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?My mum

48. What color shirt are you wearing?

Black. Like my soul.49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?Yes.

50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

Yeah. Myself.51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

… yes because he turned out to be a dick.

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?See above.

53. Do you like rain?I frikkin’ love it

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?Not really. I’d only be really worried if it was unhealthy levels of drinking.

55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

… Lmao I always tend to admit it eventually, I think. A few times I’ve been like “oh yeah, I used to have a crush on you haha” 56. Do you like to cuddle?

Never… actually… cuddled before...

57. Are you shy?

Eh, it depends. 58. Do you get along with girls?

I tend to get along better with girls than guys tbh but when I was younger I always had a lot of girl cousins and at primary school it was always pretty divided between boys and girls

59. Have you dated the person you texted last?Fuck. no.

60. What do you carry with you at all times?

My phone 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

… maybe. 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?I sure as hell hope I can

63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

Ahhh, the beginning of HSC. I was so young then. So hopeful.

Too bad my soul has been squashed. 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

… Bells has just passed out from thinking about this please leave a message after the beep *beeeeep*65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

My friend did really well on an important test and she was super happy about it haha

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

Between 17 and 18.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? I like doing my own nails but tbh I *really* wanna get them done one day.

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?

How about neither????69. Do you have any stickers on your car? Nah

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? Who?

71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? Android!

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?

Fuck if I know lmao73. Do you like diet soda?

Ew no74. What color are the walls in your room?

Varying shades of purple

75. Are you 16 or older? Yep!

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? Nope!

77. Do you have a job?

Double nope! 78. What are your initials?

Identification.79. Did you ever have braces?

Got ‘em right now haha80. Are you from the south?

I COME FROM A LAND DOWN UNDER so technically yeah

81. What does your last status on facebook say? “How does a worried Hispanic person count to three?Uno, dos, stress.”

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? Lol no I don't even know if he's alive

83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?

Mum :)84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?

I did gymnastics in kindergarten!

I hated it.85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?

Probably Moana?86. Do you smoke?

Nah 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?

THONGS M888. Is your phone touch screen?

Yes.89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?

My hair is straight than I am most of the time.90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? Haha no.91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?

Pool 92. Have you ever made out in a car? Nope

93. …Had sex in a car? Double nope

94. Are you single or in a relationship? Single!

95. What were you doing last night at midnight? Sleeping like a baby

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?

In person? A few years, now.

97. Do you like the camera on your phone? Yes. because i have a samsung galaxy s7 now. My s3 had the picture quality of a potato.

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? Nope.

99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? THREE MORE MONTHS. But no not yet

100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? Uh theres one person that i’ve been holding a grudge against for fucking ever but other than that no?

101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? … look bayer and bayer would be getting sued if i was pregnant.

102. Name your favorite Kesha song: C’mon

103. Do you have any tan lines right now?

Nah its winter so im all long shirts and knee socks rn 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?

Idk maybe

#ask #ask tag #anon #in which bells makes a sneaky admission #its not a massive thing lmao but *finger guns*

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beastlyart · 7 years

Text

Depressing veterinary stuff ahoy!

I'm usually pretty ambivalent to death and euthanasia, in my field. Most of the time that we see it, as an ER, the owner is in a desperate and sudden way and just wants that release. As weird as it sounds, I'm happy to provide it. Even if it's a coding animal and I have to provide CPR, I don't know these animals or owners, they haven't been coming to me for years, so while I completely sympathize because I have been in your position and I know how awful it is, it doesn't stick with me at all after the fact.

It's different with patients that have been hospitalized. It's not a bond even close to what their owners feel, but when a patient has been in the clinic for three or five or even ten days, you definitely develop a relationship and it's that you want them to get better, of course. Even when you know they won't, and you and the owners are just coming to terms with it.

We've had a lot of... it sounds bad, but we use dark humor to cope so w/e, but "circling the drain" cases for the past couple of weeks. Nothing that us or the owners did wrong, just an unfortunate series of circumstances. Mostly it's been either kidney failure or older animals that made it through surgery and don't do well afterwards. This is not surprising. We're basically supporting them 100% during the procedure, but afterwards it's mostly seeing how their body responds? Unfortunately it's a lot of "alive, but not living" scenarios. Like, last week we had a splenectomy cat who was... stable? But not improving after five days in the hospital, wouldn't eat, etc. He could survive for some amount of time if we force-fed him Clinicare and kept him on IV fluids for the rest of his life, but that's not a life. The same thing happened with a cat that had its sixth (SIXTH!!) foreign body surgery. He was only three years old. He had some Pica things going on and was not destined for a long lifespan anyway, but the owners still loved him enough to drop $4-6k for every single surgery. Unfortunately the nature of the beast is that with every surgery, the body produces more and more omentum until the intestines are completely adhered and nonfunctional.

The most depressing case recently is a labrador who had a bleeding mass in his spleen that needed to be removed via emergency surgery. No idea if it was cancer or just hema at this point, though likely leaning towards the former considering his age (10) and breed. He was tachycardic and erratic all throughout surgery, but we removed a two-pound mass, soldiered him through, and he seemed... okay. Still very high heart rate, throwing VPC's, anemic as hell, but not a candidate for transfusion or lidocaine intervention juuust yet? These are not at all uncommon complications of this type of surgery. It's very dangerous. But on the day shift, he seemed to perk up! He'd walk, go outside to urinate, eat on his own, etc. These are all hallmarks of a healthy animal but we were wary of sending him home and I'm glad we were. On the night shift (mine) he slowly tanked. PCV remained low but constant, but he was weaker, paler, and threw constant VPC's. Started him on a Lidocaine CRI, conferred w/ the owners about a blood transfusion and the likelihood that he would make it out of this, etc. Right before I left my shift, he had his first seizure. Not good.

He's a really, really nice dog. And I don't want to qualify one life from another, no matter your circumstances, but he's a service dog to someone physically disabled and in a wheelchair. His whole life has been revolved around this person, he's well-trained, incredibly sweet, and it just sucks. They want to take care of him the way that he's taken careof them. The owner is doing the best they can, we're doing the best we can, the dog is doing the best he can. No one did anything wrong or neglectful, we're all on board. He's just an older dog, it's a bad situation that no one is responsible for, and it. Just. Sucks.

I don't think he'll make it through. I really, really want him to, but all the signs point to No. UPDATE: He died.

#veterinary #animal death #shut up liz #meatspace #thoughts on m'brain as of late

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fifty-shades-of-succ · 7 years

Note

Questions 1-104

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? “…..FUCK”

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed? Nothing, never been kissed

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? Yes

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? No

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? Never been kissed and never been drunk

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? YEA

7. What does your last received text say? What classes u got?

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? Never been kissed

9. Where was your last kiss at? ^^

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? Don’t have one

11. What do you drink in the morning? A chocolate up and go

12. Where did you sleep last night? In my bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard? Fuckin oath

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? In the last 6-7 months maybe

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? It’d be an empty room so nah no worries

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? Rainy I reckon

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? No

18. Are you wearing jeans, sweatpants, or pajama pants? A dress

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? I think so

20. Does anyone like you? Yea

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? Nope

22. Is the last person you kissed gay? Nope

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? Yea

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? Not really

25. In the past week have you cried? I don’t go 48 hours without crying yo

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? I think a maltese…

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? Out of the shower

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? Nah

29. Do you think you’re old? No

30. Do you like text messaging? Yea its my life

31. What type of day are you having? A long and shitty and lonely one

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? No

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? Colder

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? Yea

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? Relationship I think

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? Complicated, everyone’s complicated in their own way

37. What song are you listening to? Shelter - Porter Robinson and Madeon (I cannot stop listening to this)

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? Yes, I mean it more than anything

39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? No. No girls know even half about me.

40. What made you start liking the person you like now? I don’t even know.

41. When did you last receive a text message? 5 mins ago

42. What is wrong with you right now? Fuckin everything

43. How well do you know the last female you texted? Very well

44. Does anyone disgust you? Yea

45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? Hmmm idk….

46. Are you in a good mood right now? I’m in an alright mood

47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? Luke

48. What color shirt are you wearing? A dress, and white and blue

49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? Yea.

50. Anyone you’re giving up on? I can’t really give up on people

51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? Not really, hard to hate someone like that

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? Yea lol

53. Do you like rain? Yea

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? Um idk if they're legal then I dont care. Unless theyre abusive or reckless.

55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? Um….no I generally have told everyone I’ve had crushes on, even if its been years after I had said crush.

56. Do you like to cuddle? YE

57. Are you shy? Idk a little bit

58. Do you get along with girls? Sometimes

59. Have you dated the person you texted last? Nah

60. What do you carry with you at all times? My phone, headphones, and a nail file

61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? YES, either ay I die from ghosts or I walk out with money so its a win win

62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? yea

63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? Ye

64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? HELL YEA

65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? Yeeeeeee

66. How old are the last three people you kissed? Never been kissed yaaayyy

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? Do them myself, they don’t last long anyway so why pay money

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? Zebra maybe…

69. Do you have any stickers on your car? No

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? Who?

71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iPhone ^_^

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? Um….September 17th when I stayed at my friends house. Yeah I don’t get pizza that often I don't like it

73. Do you like diet soda? Not a fan of soda anyway

74. What color are the walls in your room? Grey and light grey

75. Are you 16 or older? Yeah bro

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? No

77. Do you have a job? No

78. What are your initials? EAM

79. Did you ever have braces? Yeah and boy I am so thankful for it

80. Are you from the south? I guess

81. What does your last status on facebook say? Don’t have facebook!

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? Never been kissed

83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? Mum I guess

84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? Gymnastics, yes, but I’d love to have been a cheerleader

85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? God…..uhhhhhhhhh….oh yea I remember. Ice Age FUCKIN 5.

86. Do you smoke? No

87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? Heels boi

88. Is your phone touch screen? Yes

89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? Straight

90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? No

91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? Pool

92. Have you ever made out in a car? Unfortunately not

93. …Had sex in a car? God no

94. Are you single or in a relationship? Relationship

95. What were you doing last night at midnight? Sleeping and dreaming

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? On people’s snapchat stories for new years

97. Do you like the camera on your phone? Its better than my last phone

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? Nah

99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? No

100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? Ddont have fb

101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? Yeah I didn’t get my period for like 3-4 months even tho I’ve never so much as kissed a boy. It was a terrifying few months

102. Name your favorite Kesha song: TiK ToK

103. Do you have any tan lines right now? Fake tans lines too many, but I have a triangle on my chest

104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? What kind of fASHION SIN

Thanks for the ask!!! :D

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lysitheaioandeuropa · 7 years

Text

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? “where are we going for breakfast?”

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? not at all tbh

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? mhmmm

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? sober

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? i think thats part of learning life lessons and shit

7. What does your last received text say? “we like trying fancy waters”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? countless

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? pheeewwww lmfao like over a year ago.

11. What do you drink in the morning? water, iced tea, and coffee, all in that order

12. Where did you sleep last night? my comfortable ass bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard? yes man. even more so with BPD bc that “you go through 8 breakups a day and the other person doesn’t even know” post is dumb accurate. sometimes i’m level-headed and I trust my feelings and want to act on them, other times I don’t know if trusting them is wise, but I still FEEL things that i’m not sure what to do about.

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? HMMM YES YES YES. WOW. YES. I DON’T THINK I HAVE EVER YES’D SO HARD AT SOMETHING.

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? not at all.

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? rainy. I’m a hombody anyway, at least rainy I can enjoy it

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? who doesn’t?

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? Black jeans

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? I would like to hope so

20. Does anyone like you? mhm, little more than that

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? Idk, probably have

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? A few people from work come to mind lol

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? I have three

25. In the past week have you cried? better question is in the past week have i NOT cried?

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? red nose pitbull mix

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? out of the shower. half and half kinda

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? no

29. Do you think you’re old? existential crisis over my age on a daily basis

30. Do you like text messaging? yeah, its not as “personal,” but i like having the time to think about what i want to say. I am a better writer than i am an eloquent speaker

31. What type of day are you having? I’m not sure. I think I’m having a good one for now.

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? I have pierced it, multiple times. have a ring in it now

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? 60 degrees and sunny and cloudless is THE perfect weather.

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? mhm

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? bruh I can’t properly answer this i do not fucking know. I hate flings but relationships are energy i do not have bc hardly have any for myself

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? simple in some regards, complicated in others. more simple though, definitely. the complicated comes from being “picky,” or just aka, knowing exactly what i want and what i will or won’t put up with and so on and so forth.

37. What song are you listening to? settle down (young ruffian remix). I have been listening to the 1975, getting in my feels and shit.

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? 98% of the time i genuinely really really do. I never intentionally hurt people. But I’ve also previously owned up to the fact that i know i am super selfish and lack the proper empathy to deal w certain situations and thats where that other 2% goes to. 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? yes 41. When did you last receive a text message? right now (7:33PM) 42. What is wrong with you right now? What isn’t wrong w me omg lmao. I’m having trouble answering these as candidly as I used to 43. How well do you know the last female you texted? girl*, woman*, lady*, anything other than female jfc. and probably the girl i know the best atm 44. Does anyone disgust you? honestly, i’d probably get chewed out for this but most men. not on some “all men suck” bullshit, but more so “still dealing w some trauma and don’t know where i stand rn” 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? no? 46. Are you in a good mood right now? haven’t decided, but I am pretty nonchalant atm which is better than crying in despair every five seconds 47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? Michelle + co. 48. What color shirt are you wearing? my black work polo

49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? hmm.. yes 50. Anyone you’re giving up on? considering giving up on a few people lol 51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? not at all

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? mhm, goes back to that life lessons thing 53. Do you like rain? love that shit 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? not really 55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? mhm 56. Do you like to cuddle? mhm! 57. Are you shy? it doesn’t seem like it bc i have learned how to fake being a people person, but i rly am 58. Do you get along with girls? no, not usually 59. Have you dated the person you texted last? mhm 60. What do you carry with you at all times? my phone, and even then i dont always have it 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? hell yeah i would 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? mhm 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? mhm 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? of course 65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? hmm.. i’m sure something has. Michelle brought me butterfingers to work, and i brought her m&ms. my friend brought me tacos for lunch at work today.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? i’ll pay for my toes but do my hands myself 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? neither 69. Do you have any stickers on your car? nah 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? nah canceled at boff lmao 71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iPhone 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? i don’t recall really 73. Do you like diet soda? i don’t like any soda at all 74. What color are the walls in your room? off-white and dust rose 75. Are you 16 or older? yes 76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? only to season 4 77. Do you have a job? i have two 78. What are your initials? CMG 79. Did you ever have braces? nah, i didn’t even go to the dentist for the first time until i was 20yo 80. Are you from the south? mhm technically, FL

81. What does your last status on facebook say? I haven’t made one 82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? no i don’t unfortunately 83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? mom, but bc she’s forced our relationship on me 84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? cheerleading but i wish i had done gymnastics 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? fantastic beasts and where to find them i believe 86. Do you smoke? mhm 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? like to go out? heels 88. Is your phone touch screen? mhm 89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? curly 90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? mhm lmao 91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? springs 92. Have you ever made out in a car? i have 93. …Had sex in a car? i also have 94. Are you single or in a relationship? relationship 95. What were you doing last night at midnight? hanging out at home 96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? new years eve 97. Do you like the camera on your phone? fuckkkk yeah that 7+ 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? yeah that didnt work, not my thing 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? lmfao oh man yes ): 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? no 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? once 102. Name your favorite Kesha song: we r who we r and die young i think. cannibal and blow are really good too. 103. Do you have any tan lines right now? yes, not cute but i also just bought a new bathing suit that i hope i will tan better in 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? nahhh

#personal #?#i finished this a couple weeks ago

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fashiontrendin-blog · 6 years

Text

The Bald Truth About Losing Your Hair

http://fashion-trendin.com/the-bald-truth-about-losing-your-hair/

The Bald Truth About Losing Your Hair

For the average hirsute, image-conscious man, there are no three words in the English language more likely to prompt a gulp of foreboding than … ‘male pattern baldness’. A lexical trio so follicularly frightening that some men (Jude Law, we’re looking at you) feel the best course of action is to ignore it entirely.

But why should we? What’s so terrible about having a baldy bonce anyway? Well, nothing. In fact, studies have consistently found smooth-headed blokes to outperform their hairy cohorts when ranked in terms of perceived alpha male traits like manliness, dominance and power. In fact, many men attach a stigma to baldness that actually only exists in their own unconvincingly comb-overed heads.

Yes, being completely bald may mean you’re never able to wear your faux fur-trimmed parka zipped right up to your chin again without looking like a hard-boiled egg emerging from the rear end of a German shepherd (the dog breed, we hasten to add). But if that’s the only drawback then what’s all the fuss about?

In order to answer that question and all the rest of them, we’ve delved bald-headlong into the subject of male pattern baldness to equip you with everything you need to know before embarking on your own fuzz-free journey into the great hairless yonder.

Why Is This Happening To Me?

For young men in particular, the realisation that you’re losing your beloved locks can feel like God is singling you out and punishing you for a crime you may or may not have committed. In reality, there is something far less holy, yet every bit as uncontrollable, at play.

Male hair loss, premature or otherwise, is not caused by the judging hand of an omnipotent deity but by genetics and a chemical imbalance of a hormone called DHT (or dihydrotestosterone for syllable fans).

DHT is a chemical derivative of testosterone, created when the androgen gets mixed with an enzyme called 5-alpha-reductase, causing some complicated science stuff to happen involving lots of numbers and letters… but let’s not get bogged down in that. The thing we’re really interested in is what DHT actually does.

DHT: The Baldness Hormone

“DHT’s main function in the body is to maintain and develop sexual characteristics in men, as well as promoting a better sense of wellbeing due to the fact that it inhibits aromatase [an enzyme linked to estrogen levels],” explains renowned Harley Street hair specialist Dr Ranghu Reddy of The Private Clinic. “It also plays a key role in the development of male characteristics such as facial hair during puberty.”

Put simply, DHT is the chemical responsible for granting you a nice, bushy flavour saver. However, while it may be good news for your chin, DHT can spell disaster north of the eyebrows.

“While DHT helps with facial hair, it is also one of the contributory factors for male pattern baldness,” Dr Reddy adds. “This is because, in genetically susceptible men, the activity of DHT hinders the proper growth of hair follicles through a process called ‘miniaturisation’.”

When this happens, the DHT hormone attaches itself to the root of the hair follicle, causing the growing stage to become shorter and shorter with each new cycle. “Eventually the hairs will stop growing altogether,” adds Dr Reddy. “At which point hair loss will become more visible. This could be in the form of a receding hairline, a thinner head of hair or the all-too familiar bald patch.”

Dispelling The Myths

For each male pattern baldness fact served to us by science, the internet spews up several complete and utter fallacies. Allow us to debunk five of the most prevalent for you right here, right now.

Baldness Is Inherited From Your Mother’s Father

Taking a look at your maternal grandfather’s head is often sold as a surefire tonsorial barometer, but as any bald grandson with a hairy grandad will tell you, it’s not always pinpoint accurate.

In fact, while there is a key gene for baldness carried in the X chromosome, a chrome dome anywhere on either side of the family could be an indicator of your own hairless future.

Thanks a bunch, Uncle Bill.

You’re Only Receding Because You’re Brimming With Testosterone

Sorry to break it to you, but having a shiny melon doesn’t actually mean your body is bursting at the seams with testosterone (or ‘man juice’ as we almost wrote before quickly realising our mistake).

Male pattern baldness is dependent on testosterone but it doesn’t necessarily mean you have more of it than normal (with the obvious exception of Dwayne Johnson, that is). Unfortunately for your bragging rights, the process is mostly down to genetics.

Your Hair Loss Could Be Down To Stress

Contrary to what cartoons may lead you to believe, there is no correlation between high levels of stress and an increase in the likelihood of male pattern baldness.

So don’t worry next time you get a week’s worth of work dumped on your desk at 3pm on a Friday – at least your hair won’t fall out. Unless you tear it out right there and then, that is.

You’ve Been Wearing A Hat Too Much

So, you saw the video for Limp Bizkit’s ‘Rollin’ in 2000 and refused to remove your red baseball cap for the two consecutive years that followed. Since then you’ve gone balder than Fred Durst, the bassist and the drummer combined. And you’re probably kicking yourself because you heard that hat wearing can play a part in your follicular fate. But don’t worry, it doesn’t really.

Baldness caused by wearing a hat is simply an old wives’ tale. So you can stop beating yourself up over your adolescent headwear habits. As for the regrettable rap-metal phase…Yeah, feel free to continue berating yourself about that.

Shaving Hair Makes It Grow In Thicker

Many a bumfluff-moustachioed teenager has eagerly shaved away at his sideburns with his dad’s Mach 3, in the hope that maybe – just maybe – he’ll be greeted by Wolverine staring back at him from the bathroom mirror the following day. Many have tried; all have failed.

This is because shaving hair doesn’t actually cause it to grow back thicker. When the hair grows in again it may feel slightly more coarse at first but this is only due to it having a blunt tip.

The Psychological Toll

For all the jokes it has cracked about it, there’s no escaping the fact that even for the most laid-back of individuals, hair loss is no picnic. And it’s not purely an image thing, either. Even for men who are completely unconcerned with their looks, going bald is a sign of ageing and a grim reminder that the clock is ticking away.

“While hair loss may have few physical health consequences it can have a big impact on people’s mood,” explains Kerry Montgomery, a research associate at Sheffield Hallam University who has co-authored papers on the psychological effects of hair loss. “Hair is such a big part of how we look, and our identity. It represents our individual image and style.”

Because hair loss is so much more common in men than in women, it’s all too often assumed that the psychological effects are much less prevalent for those of us with a Y chromosome. However, in a world where male grooming is a thriving, multi-billion pound industry and social media has us more obsessed with image than ever before, that could not be further from the truth.

“We know that men experience difficulties,” adds Montgomery. “Their daily care routine may change, the way they view their appearance, and thoughts about how others view their appearance are all significant changes. We also know that men are less likely to get help if they are experiencing problems with their mood.”

However, support is available if your journey through male pattern baldness is proving to be a particularly rough ride. In addition to healthcare services, charities such as Alopecia UK can provide assistance for people living with hair loss, including practical advice, as well as the opportunity to speak with others going through the same thing. There’s even an international radio show called The Bald Truth, described as an on-air support group for people losing their hair.

So, if hair loss is really bothering you that much, what can you do to combat it?

Toupée, Or Not Toupée?

Male pattern baldness is no longer the guaranteed path to a shiny scalp it once was. We may not have a miracle cure just yet, but scientists keep assuring us that they’re right on the cusp of a major breakthrough.

In the meantime, there are a few other things you can try in order to reclaim some of your hair.

Medication

While it’s true that an easy fix remains just out of science’s reach, there are drugs that can fight the onset of male pattern baldness – namely Minoxidil (marketed as Rogaine) and Finasteride (sold as Propecia). If you’ve noticed yourself thinning on top, chances are you’ve already come across one or both of them during a frantic Googling session. But do they actually work?

“Both Finasteride and Minoxidil have been proven to preserve existing hair,” says Dr Reddy. Effectiveness and results vary from person to person, but the claims that the drugs can halt hair loss are actually completely true.

However, there are a couple of caveats. “None of the medication can actually regrow hair,” Dr Reddy adds. “But finasteride does have a propensity to reverse thinning hair.”

In addition, if you want to continue to enjoy the benefits of the medication, you will have to keep taking it until something better comes along. This is a commitment, financial and otherwise, that a lot of men either choose, or are forced, not to make.

Non-Surgical Hair Replacement System

Not only do old-fashioned wigs carry a bit of pantomime stigma, they also force wearers to live in constant fear of strong gusts of wind, thieving pigeons and the grasping hands of inquisitive children sitting behind them on the bus. However, if the advent of driverless cars, canned sandwiches and actual robots hadn’t already given the game away, this is the future we’re living in, and now we have the hairpieces to prove it.

Non-surgical hair replacements offer a semi-permanent fix for male pattern baldness by attaching real hair to the head with a strong adhesive, thus ensuring it stays firmly in place, no matter how determined that child may be to remove it.

A hair replacement system allows the wearer to wash, colour and style the hair just as he would if it were his own. The only downside is it will need to be changed every 2-5 years at a cost of £500+ each time.

hairweaveon

Hair Transplantation

Semi-permanent options are all well and good for some, but if you’re looking for the full Monty (or the full Rooney) the surgical route could be the best way to go.

“A hair transplant can significantly restore lost hair from the head, and even the beard,” explains Dr Reddy. “It’s a permanent solution that can be completed in as little as one or two sessions.”

The procedure works by taking functioning hair follicles from the back of the head (the donor site) and implanting them in the top of the head. Once complete, the follicles harvested from the donor site continue to behave in the same way as they did before they were removed, resulting in new hair growth on what was previously a barren scalp.

However, what many people thinking of undergoing the treatment don’t realise is that its success is dependent on the interlinked use of Minoxidil or Finasteride in order to prevent any of the other non-transplanted hair from thinning further. If that’s a commitment you’re prepared to make, then a hair transplant is probably your best course of action.

Embracing The Bald Life

Pills, potions, surgery and wigs may be the answer for some men, and if that’s you, fine. However, for the rest of us, there is a much simpler, faster and cheaper option available. Let’s put it like this: if you like the idea of being able to spend 10 minutes longer in bed every morning and have men in pubs assume you’re twice as hard as you actually are, the solution is merely a haircut away.

The practice of head shaving has been turning balding men into badasses for as long as there have been razors. That wispy combover can give off a vibe that you’ve lost control, but by picking up a pair of hair clippers, removing the guard and going to work you’ll put yourself back in the tonsorial driving seat and allow yourself to face hair loss on your own terms.

Talk to any shaven maven and he’ll likely tell you how much better he felt after he stopped desperately clinging onto the last of his hair and plucked up courage to take it off once and for all. It can be a liberating experience. Plus, get it out of the way while you still have youth on your side and you’ll grant yourself a nice head start on your peers, most of whom will have to contend with the onset of male pattern baldness and a mid-life crisis all at the same time.

But those aren’t the only plus points when it comes to taking the nuclear option. Once you’ve invested in a set of clippers and taught yourself how to use them, you’ll find that you’re practically rolling in money that you’d have otherwise given a barber to try in vain to disguise your ever-receding hairline. And as far as how you’ll be perceived by any potential partners, just look at Jason Statham, Samuel L Jackson. Even Larry David, who refuses to shave the back and sides has made the look his own.

How To Shave Your Head

Getting rid of the fluff is a big step but you probably know deep down it’s the right thing to do. However, before you take the plunge you’ll need to make sure you know what you’re doing. With that in mind, we hit up Joe Mills, one of London’s finest barbers, for his advice on the matter.

“If you think the time has come to shave your head then I would suggest you clipper it down first,” suggests Mills. “Initially, you want to start around a grade 3 and then work shorter. If you have a round face I would suggest you have a 3 or 2 on top and the top of the sides and go for a 1 and a fade around the edges. This will help change the shape of your face a little. “The trick is to keep it trimmed as it won’t look great if it gets fluffy.”

So, pretty simple. However, if you’ve had a taste of the bald life and are craving that next hit, you may decide you want to get the razor involved.

“If you want to shave your head bald, then this is best done the same way as your face,” explains Mills. “You need to trim the hair down super short with clippers first, then wet your scalp down with warm water and apply a shaving cream or gel. The hair on your head is different to your face and tends to be less coarse. Also, your scalp isn’t used to a razor so go easy. Rinse the blade regularly during the shave to keep it clean and clear of stubble.”

The Best Haircuts For Thinning Hair

If you’ve not quite reached Prince William levels of thinning yet then you may want to consider taking a trim to your barber before you start going ham with the Bic and the shaving foam. Admittedly, no matter how good your barber is he won’t be able to restore any of your lost locks, but what he can do is give you a cut that flatters your receding hairline.

But what should you be asking for? Well, here are a selection of the best options.

The Buzz Cut

Taking your hair down with the clippers to a uniform length all over is a great way to cater for a diminishing hairline while not going all out bald. If you were thinking about shaving your head but want to test the waters first this could be the trim you’ve been looking for.

The High & Tight

If the illusion of thicker hair is what you’re aiming for then this sibling to the military crew cut can grant you the added volume you desire. The cut takes the length very short on top and even shorter on the back and sides. This will help to create some balance between the thinning hair around the crown and the denser hair elsewhere.

The Slicked-Back Undercut

While it may not be much good for disguising a receding hairline, this undercut look is a great option if the offending area is at the crown of your head. The combed-back length on top will cover any embarrassing bald spots once its styled. Just try to avoid swimming pools.

The Short Crop

If your thinning is still relatively minor a short crop might be a good way to go. This style is cut short all over with scissors and has the power to make your locks appear fuller than they actually are.

Final Thoughts

So, far from being the terrible fate many men make it out to be, going bald is just a natural part of the ageing process and there are a number of things that can be done to fight it if you decide that’s the way to go.

However, before you spend your life savings on an expensive cosmetic procedure, do us a favour and try shaving your head first. You never know, once you start saving money, enjoying more time in the mornings and getting compliments, you might just realise that a bit of hair isn’t so important after all.

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sheepbutthead · 7 years

Note

All.

.Very concise.

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

“Hey babe.”

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

We’re dating and it’s going really well.

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

I think it depends on the drugs. I guess really anything past weed is too much.

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

Nah

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

Sober. I feel like if I really tried to kiss while I was drunk it would not go well.

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

Like? Everytime??

7. What does your last received text say?

“Thats cutee”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

Dude, who knows. Countless times.

9. Where was your last kiss at?

My bedroom? I think?

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

I can see her right now.

11. What do you drink in the morning?

Whatever spit is in my mouth. And then water because my morning breath is awful.

12. Where did you sleep last night?

My room.

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

I think they’re only as hard as you make them. But they do come with a certain level of difficulty.

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

Honestly, I haven’t done much so maybe just some of my impulse buys? I’m terrible with that shit.

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

I’d say that’s the opposite of a problem.

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

Rainy, my man

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

A lot of people have my middle name as a last name but I don’t think I’ve met anyone that has it as a middle name too.

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

PJ pants all the time, man

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

I’d really hope so.

20. Does anyone like you?

I’d really hope so.

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

Nope

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

Maybe a lil

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

I think I handle even the most annoying or asshole-ish people pretty well. Maybe my mom’s boyfriend?

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

At least three times a week.

25. In the past week have you cried?

No, but there’s been way too many close calls.

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

Pomeranian-Chihuahua mix. My bud, Dusty.

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

Out of the shower. There’s not enough room for me in the shower.

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

Naahhhh

29. Do you think you’re old?

Not really. I’m only 18. But eyyy I’ll be 19 in like…9 days.

30. Do you like text messaging?

Yes? That’s kind of a weird question.

31. What type of day are you having?

It’s alright. Just kind of neutral.

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

I’ve thought about it but I don’t think I would.

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

COLD WEATHER PLEASE

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

Definitely

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

I can appreciate both. I guess flings can be fun and not as stressful or whatever but I’d much rather be in a relationship.

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

Isn’t everyone complicated? I don’t know anyone who isn’t.

37. What song are you listening to?

Little embarrassing, but I’m listening to Pussy Doe by Pink Guy. I’m trying out new music and FilthyFrank is sort of a guilty pleasure.

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

It depends on what happened, if it was really my fault, and if the person’s being a dick about it.39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

One knows more than any others but maybe not everything.40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

She’s very genuine and super nice. She gets along well with my family and she’s been my friend for years.41. When did you last receive a text message?

Like, 10 minutes ago.42. What is wrong with you right now?

mmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMBOI43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

I think know her pretty well by now.44. Does anyone disgust you?

My mom’s boyfriend. Some other people but only at certain times. The boyfriend is a constant.45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

I’m dating someone sooo46. Are you in a good mood right now?

I’m alright. Better than I’ve been lately but not really amazing.47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?

My little brother, Noah.48. What color shirt are you wearing?

White49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

Not really. It’s been chill.50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

I’m not really giving up on anyone. I’m just losing a little faith in them.51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

Nah, I might have for a while but then I grew the fuck up and realized everything’s pretty much my fault anyway.

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

I’ve done that a few times but then I usually eventually shut it down.53. Do you like rain?

Yeah boi54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

Nah she can drink if she wants. She just has trouble with wandering off when she’s drunk.55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

I think I’ve told everyone that I’ve had a crush on about the crush at some point. That doesn’t count microcrushes though. But that barely counts.56. Do you like to cuddle?

I like it but I get a little restless just laying there so I usually have something else to do.57. Are you shy?

I guess so? Not nearly as much as I used to be.58. Do you get along with girls?

I’ve only had one friend that’s been a guy. The rest have been girls. So I guess so.59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

I am currently dating that person.60. What do you carry with you at all times?

I usually have my wallet, keys, sunglasses, and my alien hat with me. Sometimes my pocket knife. 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

It depends on if I can bring someone with me. I’ll split the money or whatever. But if I couldn’t bring someone then I think, if I really tried, I could do it. But I’ll be awake for every second.62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

I have before and I am now so yeah, I can.63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

October of 2016? Maybe? I don’t know. I was either in a fwb thing or I was dating Jessi. I don’t really remember.64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

It’s super cute. It’s hard for her to do something and not make it cute.65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

Not really. It’s been kind of a low week. Maybe my pets or something did a cute thing.

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

How old are they now? 18,18, and 17. I think. Correct me if I’m wrong.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?

I don’t really do anything with my nails except cut them so I’ll just do it myself. 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?

Ew. I think maybe leopard print. It’s probably the lesser of two evils. 69. Do you have any stickers on your car?

I have a reflective sheep sticker for my nickname. 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?

Probably Lil Wayne. I don’t like country music.71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone?

Android, yo.72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?

When I was like, 10. I don’t like Pizza Hut pizza. 73. Do you like diet soda?

Nah74. What color are the walls in your room?

Like an eggshell white75. Are you 16 or older?

I’m older than 16. 76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?

Nope 77. Do you have a job?

Not really. I cut grass and watch my brothers. That’s about it. 78. What are your initials?

JBW79. Did you ever have braces?

Nope, thank god.80. Are you from the south?

Unfortunately. Alabama is beautiful, geographically. But everything else is kind of shitty.

81. What does your last status on facebook say?

Shit I don’t know. I never really made any status posts myself. I was just tagged in a lot of stuff.82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?

Yes83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?

Probably my mom, but that’s mainly because she has custody of me.84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?

Nope, I’m not flexible at all. 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?

I think it was some superhero movie. I really can’t remember.86. Do you smoke?

Nah but I want to try weed.87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?

Flip flops but not the ones with the thing that goes in between your toes. The sliders or whatever they’re called. 88. Is your phone touch screen?

Yes?89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?

My hair is curly. I have no choice in the matter.90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?

A bunch of times.91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?

I’d rather swim in a pool because I’m paranoid.92. Have you ever made out in a car?

The next question is kind of going to answer this again but yeah.93. …Had sex in a car?

Yes and it was surprisingly good for being so cramped.94. Are you single or in a relationship?

I’m taken, yo.95. What were you doing last night at midnight?

Burning my eyes out with my computer screen and looking for that meme hoodie with all the hentai sex faces on it because it’s horrible and I want it.96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?

I have a bunch of fireworks left over from the 4th of July so I shoot them off sometimes.97. Do you like the camera on your phone?

Yeah it’s pretty good.98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?

A few times, yeah. 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?

Nah but I was close one time. 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?

Nah, I usually just cut them out because facebook is a black hole of garbage and I don’t really care about it.101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?

Kind of but nothing super scary.102. Name your favorite Kesha song:

I don’t really listen to her but I think I heard one of her recent songs and it was pretty good.103. Do you have any tan lines right now?

Only my slightly-less-pale farmer’s tan kind of thing. I’m pale, man.104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?

In my younger years, yes. But no, not now.

#asksaps #this was pretty fun

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