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takearisk-xo · 3 months

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status update (?)

it's 2024, my real life is a bit of a mess (pending job change & cross country move), and i need a plan. i keep getting this urge to streamline, instead of bouncing around between fics like a goldfish with no attention span, so i'm going to lean into that and hope to god we get some results.

this is in terms of actively writing and posting. guaranteed i will still be daydreaming and plotting for all fics, but i still want to share some expectations with you all so we are on the same page and so i can hold my self accountable to my own imaginary deadlines.

at this point in time, i am going to post and complete SPRING FEVER first. it is the easiest and quickest to finish (pun intended) by far. and the only reason i haven't done it, is because i'm convinced the majority of you want other updates first. but i need to get it out of my head and off my plate.

after spring fever is completed... give me a few weeks? then THE PATH FROM YOU takes the drivers' seat. we are so close to the climax and conclusion, that it *should* go pretty quick and fast-paced from here. I don't have a timeline for completion but my goal is to post one chapter a month once we get to that point.

here is where i'm going to disappoint some of you. ALREADY GONE is going on hiatus. at least until the path from you is finished. this fic started as a side project, a distraction (read: shitpost), and now I have to rethink some things and potentially even dedicate myself to some mild rewrites. there is just a lot I want to do with it now, that i didn't in the beginning, and i want to be able to dedicate my full headspace to it. because the emotions and conclusion could be so good, but only if i give it time.

for hannah 2.0 and val: MEMORIES FEEL LIKE WEAPONS will get it's day in the sun. i've been taking notes on it for over a year, and i definitely need to work through it and finish it before i even attempt a tpfy sequel. there is so much i want to showcase in this fic outside of ginny's journey, but like with already gone, i need the time and headspace to do it. i will also, almost definitely, rewrite and repost chapter 2 at some point. i have more groundwork i need to lay with a certain slytherin. but that's a discussion for another day.

if this is in anyway a let down for you, i'm sorry. but this is the only way i can stay sane during a total life upheaval. thanks for sticking around if you've read this far and still like me. as always, i will post an changes or updates as soon as i figure them out.

love you all,

hannah <3

#about my writing #the path from you #already gone #spring fever #hinny

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diaryofagamesmaster · 1 month

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Day -2

Dear Diary,

I know what you're thinking.

Why start at -2? Why not start at 0 or 1?

Well it's simple, really. I made this blog 3 days before my first day at work, so 'Day 1' is the beginning of actually working there. When you think of diaries you don't normally think of negatives but hey-ho, that's the way I've done it and it's sticking.

Anyways! Since you've come this far (or you've spotted it early, lucky you), I'll use it as an opportunity to talk about what's led up to me getting a job, and a bit about me.

I've grown up in an unusual and rural way, living mostly on farms. And granted it's been nice, after all growing up around animals is a genuinely pleasant way of life and helps you understand a surprising a lot about the world quickly. But, you do have to sacrifice some amenities that seem standard, like privacy beyond your house during the day (with farm 1) and toilet plumbing (with farm 2), but it's whatevs.

Few years ago I started the journey to University. Had to make an application for it as part of college's scheme to get students into universities, so I picked one close and went through the courses alphabetically til I found one interesting. Stopped at Archaeology, never made it to B.

And during that first year, things were tough but I ended up making some of the best friends of my life there. Through it, I felt alright in the end, though admittedly I didn't really care much about the education side.

Then second year came about, and I won't lie it began a bit rocky. I moved in with my housemates (the friends I made last year) and turns out, people who live in normal conditions and people who live on farms clash a little over ways of life (that and over the summer I got an OCD diagnosis, yay). But, after a bit, things slowly stabilised; there were arguments and the like but in the end we made it through.

I was also struggling a lot with assignments. Couldn't focus, couldn't deliver assignments to any personally-decent quality, all in all just became a struggle after another. Wasn't really feeling it for University, but I also didn't want to leave my friends, so I was stuck in a bit of a dilemma.

TW: Animal Death

Then, near the very start of 2024, my Border Collie Alfie passed away. I'd grown up with him, literally, for the past 18~ years. Saw him from rescue pup when we got him to his sundown years, and I'm glad he lived a long and happy life. But when he did pass, it hit me like a truck. I'd never had a close death before, and I didn't know how to cope. So much had changed, and I felt it was the right time to really change things, so I began the process of withdrawing from university.

Initially, I didn't want to do anything at all and just wanted to stop one difficulty. For about a month, I was idly looking for jobs, but nothing serious. Then I partially reignited a desire to go back to University, this time in a different part of the country, but that's fizzled out. However during that reignition, I put in more effort to get a job, and...

...Well, I ended up here. Ended up getting 2 job offers in 1 day, and I took them both! One's seasonal (aka not this one), and the other's hopefully one that'll evolve into something full time (after all this is entry -2, I haven't been to work yet!). Stuff like D&D's a huge hobby of mine, so having the opportunity to put that Dungeon Master knowledge of suspense, tension, and dealing with people figuring out puzzles was perfect for me.

So, with that bit of backstory out of the way, thanks for giving this a read! Hopefully you'll join me on my journey moving forward, and you enjoy the silly stuff I share with you all!

#diary entry #dear diary #my diary #escape room #game master #games master #tw animal death #my gm diary

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galacticnova3 · 4 years

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I don't know if you've answered something like this before, but when did you start to become attached to Lor and/or Nova? Is there a history behind it or did it just happen and kind of spiral. I love your stuff by the way, stay hydrated.

It’s kinda difficult to explain without delving into some personal stuff, but I’ll try to explain it as best I can. I can’t add a read more on mobile, so be warned this is going to be a long post. I’ll tag it as such. By long I mean I’m scrolling back up to add I’ve been typing for over half an hour. Might as well just call this half of my life story. Anyways...

Nova was the first of the two I developed a big interest in, hence why all my social media is named what it is. At first it was something I kept to myself because it was during a very difficult time in my life. To be frank, if it weren’t for me deciding to draw Nova one night, I probably wouldn’t be here. What started out as what I thought would be a temporary distraction turned into my first source of legitimate interest and motivation; I saw the drawing I made that night, what I thought would be my last contribution to the world, and thought, “Well this doesn’t look great. I can do better.”

And so I begun trying to do just that. Constantly drawing Nova, slowly letting the idea of him being just a mere distraction from the inevitable choice I thought I would make fade away. Because, for once, I actually had a solid interest, something to focus on that I could keep improving at and show others I was improving at. And when you start to improve at something, suddenly you feel a bit better about yourself.

In that journey of realizing I had more reason to live than I thought, I started getting attached to Nova as a character, and one I could relate to for a very long time. While most say Nova looks sleepy, I’ve always seen it as tired; not in the physical way, but in terms of emotions. Tired of waiting, of existing; lonely, too. I felt that.

I also connected strongly with the way Nova was always treated by the fandom, as I started interacting with it. Always in the background, overshadowed by others, and in general ignored; just like how I felt constantly. Everyone around me seemed to excel at something, or was popular and beloved, or otherwise was at least something. They were the Marxes, the Galacta Knights, the Dededes, Meta Knights, Kirbies.

I, on the other hand, was not. At best I was a collection of little somethings in a trench coat, stuff that didn’t matter but at least gave me some semblance of identity. I liked bugs, I liked video games, I liked going outside, things like that. A random assortment of different, miscellaneous parts, but no real idea what those parts made or what I was without them. Sound familiar?

Nova became a huge part of my identity in a matter of months. I lived and breathed Nova, I wrote bad Nova fanfic, I made doodles of Nova on possibly every paper assignment in school. I was, honestly, entirely obsessed.

That’s kinda when things started to change, some ways for the better, some for worse. Obviously, I had a massive level of interest in one specific random character that nobody else really shared. I talked about almost nothing but said interest, made content only of said interest.

People began getting annoyed, but I didn’t notice until it was too late. Suddenly people I was close to began to express dislike towards Nova because of me. Me, who identified in every way as something tied to Nova. People talked about me behind my back, vagued about me, and ultimately some made it abundantly clear that they didn’t respect me. Some of those people I still can’t avoid today.

That became another low point for me. My depression got bad again, as did my anxiety. Not quite as low as I was that fateful night, at least, but low enough for my self esteem to plummet to levels it still hasn’t reached again. That wasn’t helped by the fact that I constantly associated myself with a character that was lonely, depressed, and tired in general.

Eventually I had the unconscious realization that I had to find something else to split my focus with. For a little bit that was Star Dream, but ultimately it didn’t stick. I’m very close to someone who really likes Meta Knight, so I tried to fixate on him, too. That didn’t last either. Marx was a definite no, given past experiences with several Marx fans sending me hate and death threats for not liking him.

Eventually I realized the problem was that I didn’t relate to any of these characters in a meaningful way. There was nothing to latch onto for me. So, I went back to square one in having to figure out what my identity was, just minus Nova. Which was a lot harder than I’d like to admit. Seriously, even my favorite color was because of Nova.

My goal eventually became to find someone that had aspects of Nova that wouldn’t encourage me to identify as lonely and depressed at all times, who was strong and independent and likable and maybe even not a background character! Like... MAGOLOR!

And then I fell in love with his pretty boat instead.

But! All that gave me something to work with; Lor was, in essence, a blank slate; had the bare minimum qualifications to be considered a character. Kinda like how I felt I had the bare minimum things to qualify as a person. It became a case of doing exactly what I did with Nova, but with the goal of making her like someone completely different and unexpected. I slapped on random personality traits I had or had had and decided, hey, this works, I can trick myself into being a new person by pretending it’s a character! Which was in essence exactly my process with Nova, just in a conscious manner this time.

It was around this time I first figured out I was asexual, thanks to my oldest sister, and how perfect was it that both my old and new obsessions were machines? Bam, they’re ace too, so now I have a medium to explore what that really means for me. Same thing happened when I realized I was panromantic. This happened with a lot of stuff as I learned more about myself via treating myself as characters that needed a happy ending.

Nowadays I’ve managed to separate myself a bit, and made Nova and Lor more than just The Staples Of My Identity. It still hurts a lot when people are mean about them, especially when it comes to old trauma, but not as much as it used to. Nowadays they’re just my big faves/comfort characters, but they’re still extremely important to me either way.

If you got this far, thank you for taking the time to read through this, it means a lot to me.

#ask response #ask to tag #long post #very long post #rambling #so yea I figured I might as well just. say everything #hopefully this clears some stuff up for people

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keyboard-smashed · 5 years

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The Storm That's Brewing

Summary: Pat & Lo leave restaurant early to take Roman

Warnings: restaurant, someone's a bit ill, dark alley (but not for long dw)

(first, previous, next chapter links at bottom)

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Chapter 7- You Okay, Boss?

Virgil stepped out of the bathroom and scanned the restaurant for his table. It was easy to find the large Hogwarts-themed tables in the corner while the lights were on. It was lucky Roman hadn’t stated singing again, Virgil didn’t think he could find the table in the dark. He’d left his contacts at the apartment.

From what Virgil could see, Patton and Logan in some awkward staring contest in silence. He neared the table and heard Logan say something, to which Patton replied, 'Pasta.' What were they talking about?

Patton spotted Virgil approaching.

“Virgil, kiddo! I’m glad you’re back!”

Virgil looked suspiciously between the two, “Uh, what were you guys talking about?”

Logan didn’t have a chance to reply.

“Food!” Patton said, “Tomorrow night! Pasta sound good?”

Logan shot him an irate look.

What was going on? Virgil was certain it wasn’t about tomorrow night’s dinner.

Luckily or unluckily (Virgil wasn't sure), Roman was back on stage before he could get an answer. Virgil supposed his answer could wait. Patton couldn't lie to him when they were alone later.

Halfway through Roman's set, Roman's manager walked, or rather, stumbled towards the guys' table.

"Hey guys," He whispered, leaning slightly on the table, "I'm feeling a little under the weather, do you mind asking Roman to lock up?" He slid his key across the table.

Logan reached for the key.

"Of course."

Patton frowned, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just a little ill. Nothing big." He coughed.

Virgil, who was closest to the manager, covertly shuffled away.

"Well, I hope you feel better dude."

"Thanks."

The manager started to walk away. Almost immediately, he walked into a table then apologised profusely.

Patton quietly called him back to the table.

"How are you getting home?"

"Walking. I only live twenty minutes from here."

"You are in no fit state to walk that far." Logan stated, "I can chauffeur you home. Then I may return and pick up Patton, Virgil and Roman so we may go home also."

"Are you sure? I don't want to be a hassle." The manager said.

Patton yawned, "Of course you're not a hassle. We insist."

"Pat maybe you should go with them. You've been yawning all night. After you drop, uh-" Virgil couldn't remember the manager's name. Had they actually ever been introduced? "-after you've dropped him off, go home. Me and Roman can get home alone, it's a short walk."

Patton furrowed his brow.

"Are you sure? I can stay- or we could stick to Logan's plan?"

"Yeah, it's fine Pat." Virgil insisted.

"I agree with Virgil. Plus, we can continue our previous discussion."

Patton's gaze lingered on his brother for several seconds before he agreed.

Virgil reckoned, from the manager's expression, that he wanted to dispute the plan. Perhaps offer to walk again. Virgil would. However he'd grown increasingly paler and sickly during their short conversation. Virgil hoped that his illness wasn't contagious.

Logan traded Virgil the restaurant key for the car keys, which Roman had entrusted him with, and left with Patton and the manager.

Roman, who'd been watching the whole ordeal confusedly from the stage, was trying to catch Virgil's eye and ask what the hell was going on.

Virgil glanced at Roman finally who looked at him, to the door and then put his hand up in a "what just happened?" kind of gesture while still singing.

His reply, too, was a series of gestures that would most certainly not win in a game of charades: using his fingers held up to his eyes as glasses, he mimed out Patton and Logan driving, followed by an outline made by his fingers of the roof of a house, signaling that they had driven back home.

It was a confusing show to say the least, but Roman seemed to understand well enough. He nodded to show his comprehension, then pointed to the door of the back office with a questioning look on his face.

“Boss?” he mouthed during the instrumental of his current song.

Virgil hung the keys by his pointer finger and shook them near his own face so that Roman could see. He flashed him a quick “what are ya gonna do” face, which was met with a pair of thumbs up and Roman's stupid, perfect smile.

Virgil couldn't help but return a small smile before he tore his gaze away and back to the table.

There were only two more songs left in Roman's set, to Virgil's disappointment. While he didn't know half of the sings that Roman had sung, he still enjoyed it a lot. Roman was an amazing singer- a fact that he told Roman as soon as he left the stage (after a long bow and applause, of course, even though there were only a few people left in the restaurant).

Roman smiled awkwardly, "Thanks," He looked around the now empty restaurant, "So, why did the nerd, Patton and Thomas leave?"

'Thomas! That was his name!' Virgil recalled.

Virgil sat down again at another table. Roman followed suit.

Virgil explained, "Your boss- uh- Thomas looked super ill and was gonna go home but Pat insisted on driving him, well, Logan driving him. Anyway they were gonna come back for us but it was nearly the end of your set and Pat looked really tired so I said they should just go home," He couldn't read Roman's expression, "They obviously took your car, is that okay? I can text Pat or Logan and ask them to pick us up-"

"There's no need to do that, Charlie Frown. I'm sure I can escort you home safely," Roman assured Virgil.

"Escort me home?" Virgil snickered, even though he was a tiny bit grateful. He was understandably nervous about walking home at 11pm. They'd have to take the backstreets if they wanted to get home quickly- or get stabbed. Either way.

"Of course, what else is a prince to do?"

Virgil rolled his eyes, "You've really embraced the prince thing, huh?"

"Obviously, it's so on brand for me," He struck a pose. Virgil reluctantly laughed.

"Alright Princey, but we should probably get going."

"Alas, you are correct," Roman hopped off the bench he'd been perching on and offered an arm for Virgil, "Let us depart."

Virgil rolled his eyes, which was becoming a common occurrence around Roman, but took his arm anyway; only because that was the quickest way to make them start walking, of course.

Roman locked up. Virgil made sure that all entrances were locked. Three times. Then they began their journey.

Strangely, the walk would've been quicker than the drive, due to the strange layout of that part of town. Of course it only would've been quicker, had they not gone down one alleyway that changed their journey completely.

Until Roman and Virgil had approached this alleyway, they had spoken in comfortable quiet conversation; speaking of nothing in particular, but speaking nonetheless. However, upon entering the alleyway, the two fell silent. Neither knew why exactly, they just felt a building sense of foreboding.

The alleyway wasn't too narrow. Virgil and Roman could walk comfortably side by side, with the large garbage bins to their side. Virgil always found alleyways that were very narrow to be scary-- there was little space to run. But wider alleyways were equally as frightening (who knew what was lurking near the bins?) Maybe Virgil just didn't like alleyways. It was one of the countless things that made him nervous.

Suddenly, the bins rattled. Virgil and Roman shot around. Virgil's anxiety shot through the roof. A thousand volts coursed through his body. Metaphorically, and then, literally. A bolt of lightning shot from Virgil's body and hit a bin. He heard a yelp.

At the same time, Roman covered Virgil's eyes and grabbed his hand. Virgil felt as if he'd been submerged into an ice bath. The world spun and then... He fell.

He hit the ground but it was soft, unlike the cement they'd been walking on before.

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Taglist: r/nobodyasked(tobeadded)

Chapter 1:

Chapter 6:

Chapter 8:

#almost up to date #the storm that's brewing #tstb #tstb chapter 7 #prinxiety #logicality #im so sorry for spamming dashboards honestly #roman sanders #logan sanders #thomas sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #sanders sides

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