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traumasurvivors · 6 months

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I’m having some pretty big feelings about turning 30 next month.

It’s making me feel anxious and sad. I lost so many years to trauma and mental illness. So many years being in a dissociative state where I can’t recall most memories and don’t even know what happened.

And I’m someone that likes to remind people that “you aren’t behind, you can still have a lot of good life left” and it’s true. But this is a reminder I need right now and want to share with others in case they need it, too.

It’s okay to have big feelings about the years you’ve lost. It’s okay to mourn and grieve the years. It’s okay if you move beyond those feelings but they come back whether it’s because of a birthday or another reminder. You are allowed to have those big feelings. You don’t need to be positive all the time.

What happened sucked, and you’re allowed to acknowledge that and feel that.

#my post #also random but #I think I’ve had this blog for like… 7ish years?#weird to think some of you have been following me since I was around 23 years old

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puppyeared · 3 months

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Ever since I was a little girl I always knew I wanted a butch twice my size to call me a good boy

#it hasn’t happened yet but I think it will fix me once it does #Im not much of a boy or a girl or anything and I gave up trying to put a name on it. but I really like that phrase #its weirdly pleasing and I wish I had more situations where I could call myself that…. sigh #I noticed that whenever I do smth like look both ways before crossing the street or hold the door for someone #I find a little voice in the back of my head praising me like wow!! good job!! you’re such a good boy!!!#idk what that says abt me but im not complaining. I am a good boy #I hope everyone is having a good week!! and if not I sincerely hope it gets better and the weeks to come #im updating my blog again for fun ^_^#so far I’ve updated my header icon and text color but since im on the bus rn I might go back and change things when I get home #I also saw someone walking across campus wearing nothing but a t shirt and shorts in -15 Celsius weather #yapping

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maddymoreau · 15 days

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Why is everyone in Fallout 3 extremely hot

#I’m not going to live-blog Fallout 3 since I’ve had a LARGE amount of the game spoiled for me.#¯\_(ツ)_/¯ So I feel like that defeats the purpose of a live-blogging.#BUT GOOD LORD IF THERE’S ONE THING THE FALLOUT SERIES KNOWS HOW TO DO IT’S MAKE HOT MEN!!!!!!!#Mister Burke becoming a stuttering mess because I called him lover was so attractive.#THE WAY HE DID A 180 ON HIS EVIL PLANS LMAO!!!!#ALSO BUG IF YOU’RE READING THIS I MET YOUR BOYFRIEND GOB!!!!!#Gob’s design is *chef kiss* WOOF WOOF BARK BARK!!!#Great taste as usual!!! ALSO I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM!!!!!!#Once I figure out how to do it without getting caught I’m going to kill Moriarty 🫡!!!!!#I’ve heard there’s a lot of ghouls in Fallout 3 so I’m VERY excited to meet them. Especially fan favorite Charon.#I LOVE BEAUTIFUL MEN!!!!!!!!!#Butch was a bully but hearing how happy he was I saved his mom was very cute.#ALSO HE GAVE ME HIS JACKET AS A THANK YOU!!!! AND LIED WHEN THE GUARDS ASKED IF THEY HAD SEEN ME!!!!!!#⭐️ Not as big of a jerk as you could’ve been ⭐️#MaddyPlaysFallout3 #Fallout 3 #If I had to rank them (off my own personal taste) it’d be 1. Mister Burke 2. Gob 3. Butch.

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just-antithings · 3 months

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radfem with a kpop stan blog is still the weirdest combination to me like you hate all men but reblog gifset after gifset of kpop idols? make it make sense

#if I had to guess it’s probably the racism of seeing asian men as less masculine or something like that #since like 99.99 percent of radfems are white #and every single one I’ve seen with a kpop blog definitely is #mod erin #just exclusionist things

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novelconcepts · 27 days

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The fucking choking noise I made when I tuned into a podcast for my run and heard a recent favorite actor go, “I’m still on Tumblr, don’t tell anyone.”

#me frantically looking at the date:#‘right this was 2021. what are the odds they still are? I mean. 14 years for MY gay ass. so. soooo.’#'do you look at your own tags? at your character? at your ship? SURELY Not. but i would. so could i even blame you? welcome? sorry? help.'#I’m honestly so much less alarmed at the idea of favorite actors finding me NOW vs the truly horrendous idea #that they might have found me back in like 2011-2015 #like. I hate that person. the person who ran my blog back then suuuuucked #which is great cuz it means I’ve grown and matured and experienced life enough to improve #but also like. imagine your favorite actor knowing your tumblr blog from Before #and just loooooathing you #finding out you’re the one writing a ton of fic for their character now and being like ‘THAT one? really?’#'i've had your URL blacklisted since the GLEE DAYS' fucking imagine #anyway. all of this is moot certainly. like there is just no way. it's all good.#but it did make me make the most unholy noise mid-run so thanks for THAT

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mattodore · 1 year

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new sim to test out new cas lighting

#simblr #ts4 #sims 4 #ts4 cas #my sims #river dipping #andddd mel’s gshade! tho i’ve already had it downloaded for a bit #it’s rlly nice 🥰#like i might actually switch to it instead of the cas preset i’ve been using since i started this blog which is a big deal to me !#ummm anyway this sim 🫡#he was kinda meant to be dionte’s step-dad at the start but idk i just went my own way at some point so now he’s just A Guy I Made #also i noticed while i was trying to sculpt his face that my jowls slider isn’t working :/ i guess i need to batch fix it maybe?

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connectedspace · 5 months

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as fun as that was, and i would never stop doing fun gift art for the world

its disheartening, and hurts, to try and get engagement from people. to struggle to get asks for weeks. and i know im not the most active blogger, but as soon as i offer free art, i get swamped with asks. where is that beforehand? i dont know what to say entirely, it just makes me depressed. the fact that people are so quick to jump on my ask memes but wont talk to me or this blog otherwise. i dont know what to do

I don’t want to tell anyone that it’s bad to ask for it, or that it’s bad to receive it. Because that’s not what I’m trying to say. But it just sucks to get low engagement and people only interact with you to receive art, often without giving you anything in some way. It’s fine if it happens sometimes, but it’s exhausting when it’s repeated. It makes you feel like people only want you for free gifts that you put time and effort into but won’t give you the same effort

I guess I’d just like to encourage everyone to send regular asks to each other, even if it’s on anon. That’s all I’d want to see not even just for myself but mostly for others

#again I know I’m not super active or have the most posts #but I’ve had this blog for 3 years and have been in the community since 2018 #again it was really fun but considering that I barely get anything for my regular Mundays and have to make regular ask calls #I guess I’m not really asking for much #even if people giving each other stuff like equal attention is my ideal #but I suppose if this trend keeps continuing and I post less stuff like the drawing meme #you’ll know why #I have an ask answer ready to post tomorrow too #my life has just been crazy but Khaos has always had such a chill blog to update #im quite shy and I know I’m not very outgoing but I’ve been around for 5+ years and this just keeps happening #I’m not blaming anyone either or anything this isn’t targeted or whatever #but I’m just already dealing with stuff and I wanted to say something finally #I don’t like making posts like this but I guess I deserve to be able to for once #this is also not the first time it’s happened it happens with a lot of memes I post that are art related so yknow

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errorsystemfailure · 8 months

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rough episode of malevolent for those of us who don’t forgive or want forgiveness from our fathers

#i do not understand why this man cares about Daniel at ALL. i found Daniel appalling for p much the entire episode he was in-#before he got shot and he has not improved much to me since. I’m sorry that Arthur lacks a father figure but this is a mess to me 😭#and it was the conceit of THE WHOLE EPISODE.#I hope no more Daniel for a while I’ve had enough #(there ARE dad forgiveness storylines that are compelling to me but this one felt so quick I got whiplash yknow)#(sorry for being a hater. I liked the part where John was there. I’ve missed him)#malevolent #malevolent spoilers #malevolent part 35 #amalgamation blogs

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beanieman · 7 months

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as someone struggling to keep their evil version hidden away in their basement, I need some advice, how do you deal with @evilbeanieman ?

I simply observe them to see what they’ll do next.

#I also feel like I should clarify since I’ve had some confused people in my ask box: Evilbeanieman is their own blog #I don’t run it /gen #They’re their own evil entity #mod rambles #asks

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seventh-district · 2 days

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so uh. that 2.2 Special Program, huh

#hsr #honkai star rail #hsr 2.2 #hsr spoilers #hsr leaks #the body of this post reads as far less enthusiastic than i really am #i just don’t know how to casually return from my latest 2 week hiatus only to gush abt a game i’ve hardly blogged abt before #but i’m not making a whole ass sideblog for it like i did for Genshin. nah y’all r gonna bear witness to my fixation with this one #so anyways don’t mind me. vibrating into another dimension with anticipation for the next 11 days #it’s insane man. a year ago i Never ever woulda thought i’d be so invested in this game. and it took Months for the game to really grab me #but i’m v glad i kept coming back even when i was struggling to really get into it. like i just had this feeling that if i stuck around and #gave the game a chance to really like. come into its stride. i just always felt like there was Something there and i just hadn’t found it #and holy shit i finally found it in Penacony. the devs really truly outdid themselves with this region and these characters and this story #not to discount everything that’s happened prior. like i was genuinely Liking it all before now but i wasn’t Loving it y’know #but that may be more a ‘me having to fight tooth n’ nail to force myself to consume new media’ thing than it is a matter of the actual game #anyways i came here to talk abt the program! bc since i’m not filming my HSR stuff i’m gonna be insufferable abt it on Tumblr instead ! :)#and i’m probably not filming any more Genshin stuff. or anything else at all for that matter but let’s not talk abt that dead dream #pun not intended lmao. Anyways let’s return to the subject at hand while there’s still room left in these tags shall we #i’m so fucking glad they had Aventurine on this program man. especially since he’s leaked to only have 18 lines in 2.2… it was nice to see-#-him here at least 🥹 i’ll take what i can get. his unenthusiastic little bird noises at the beginning.. him being reluctant to come out..#the way one of the first things to come out of his mouth was ‘y’know DR RATIO once told me…’ like boy we get it ur in love with him 🙄 (/J!)#i love how they can’t go on these programs w/o talking abt each other it’s adorable. AND THE WAY HE WAS THE ONE TO EXPLAIN BOOTHILL’S KIT!?#they can’t just fuel my crackship like this… god and his whole ‘muddle-fudger.. son-of-a-nice-lady?’ thing had me wheezing #Aven mocking Boothill’s inability to curse was not on my special program bingo card but fuck i’m here for it #and Robin being all curious abt him was so cute.. ‘who /is/ he? … does he order milk at the bar?’ i’m crying she’s so sweet #also the trailer was fucking insane. which feels redundant as hell bc all of HoYo’s version trailers go hard but like. still. wow.#that millisecond long shot of Boothill surveying the skyline is so fucking good. also what the fuck is Jing Yuan doing here!!#not complaining at all tho. we’ve got JY & DH(IL?). Argenti(?). Boothill. Sunday. Aven. all my men r here and i am eating so fucking good #Seven.txt #viddy game stuff

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thatsreallygay · 9 months

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NEW BLOG:

You can find me over at @imsoogay.

I’ll follow back IF you’re not a pornbot, blank blog, a minor, or a cis/het man. If you’re anyone that I listed, you’re blocked.

#just needed a refresh #i’ve had this blog since like 2013-2014 and who knows i may come back to it #so yeah! here’s to new beginnings! pls come be gay with me!#i’ll be reblogging this a lot so i apologize in advance #wlw #girls who love girls #girls who like girls #gwlg #follow my blog

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demigodofhoolemere · 2 months

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I’ve been seeing this float around on Facebook lately and it’s bugging the crud out of me:

What is with everyone’s obsession with insisting it’s bad to need to be rescued? For as long as the human race has been on the planet, people have had problems that they needed other people’s help to resolve. Needing help is not a failing nor should it be the takeaway from these princesses’ stories as if it’s a bad thing that makes them weak. Yes, they do need help. Your point?

Snow White and Aurora were both under a curse that rendered each of them effectively dead. Were they supposed to magically wake themselves up? I’d want to be rescued if I were them. Plus, breaking it down to “she needed a prince” belittles the efforts of the Seven Dwarfs and the Three Good Fairies, who did most of the legwork in the resolution of their respective movie plots out of deep platonic love for the girls under their care. Then there’s Cinderella, who lived in an abusive household. It’s not a weakness that she wasn’t able to get out of that situation on her own, and once again, giving all the credit to the prince (and credit where credit is due, he did search far and wide for her and was able to take her away from that life in the end) detracts from the aid provided by the Fairy Godmother who enabled her to get out in the first place. All of these ladies had more helpers than just their princes, and it is because of the combined love and efforts of all of these people that our heroines were able to have their happy endings. There are plenty of great stories where the heroine is able to fight for herself, but these particular stories aren’t about that because these ladies are each in terrible circumstances where they simply don’t have the ability to do so. They do what they can, but in the end they can’t save themselves alone and there’s nothing wrong with that. These are beautiful stories about having people in your life that value you enough to fight for you when you can’t fight for yourself. Wouldn’t we all want someone to come to our rescue when there’s nothing we can do about our situation? Is it not a good and comforting moral to show that there are people in your corner who will show up for you no matter what the circumstances?

The other thing that’s bugging me about this:

Leia has to be rescued. By a man, and at that, one who could technically be seen as a prince. No one bats an eye at this, because it’s understood that she’s being held prisoner on the Death Star and couldn’t possibly be expected to get out of that on her own. It’s not seen as a weakness that someone had to come for her and take her away from there. Leia is awesome and is rightfully acknowledged as a great heroine, but she also needs help sometimes, because everybody does.

So WHY do people get so hung up on these princesses who also shouldn’t be expected to get out of their own prison cells of eternal sleep or abusive family by themselves? Why the strong negative reaction to girls needing outside help in such serious scenarios? For all that people say these stories teach girls to sit and wait for a man to save them, the stories themselves absolutely never try to say that, and frankly, with the opposite trend in recent years of fictional women who have to do everything on their own and can’t be shown to need help because they have to be the Strong Female Character, I’d be far more concerned about the impact that would have on girls. Far better to say you might need help at some point in your life than to instill the idea that you’re not a strong girl or not good enough if you can’t do everything by yourself.

Anyway. Justice for the classic Disney princesses.