#but also i feel like i havent been on here at all in so long bc of finals😩😩

[anime-dreams]

Idk man pt 2??? Jjk season 2 was traumatising (gege 😡) but sukuna was really hot

Anyways heres Shokos pov after ✨Gojoe✨ and 🗣️Geetoes🦶breakup (i love shoko omg shes so hot and shes savage)

I could barely recognise you after he left. Those blue eyes no longer held the familiar warmth and glow. Your mood swings were so sudden, your silence was so loud, i could not stand to be around you for too long anymore. But you know what i could not stand most? Seeing you, the supposed “strongest” wasting away, like a dimming star. What have you became? Unrecongisable. 

I still keep in touch with Geto. I receive his letters twice a week, and the way he talked about you, it was like you hung stars in the sky. Each one of those letters never failed to mention your name, never failed to ask me to check up on you. And that day, i knocked softly on your door, with a bag full of your favourite snacks. You were crying. I heard it. You never cried, at least, not in front of me. But when you opened the door, you greeted me with a smile that did not reach your eyes. Why are you hiding your feelings from me? Have i also not been with you for the past 2 years? I reached out my hand to pat your back, to try to comfort you, and you flinched, taking a step back, as my hand came into contact with seemingly nothing. Oh yeah, i forgot. Your infinity has been on ever since he left. You took one more step back awkwardly, not meeting my eyes. I know that i can never replace him, but for you to act like im a complete stranger… was i not there? Your actions following his disappearance… it made me question myself if my place in your lives have ever been as meaningful as i had thought. Was i merely an afterthought in the story of our friendship? I didnt even remember how i felt, but i heard myself yell: “Can you suck it up and get the hell over him already?” and the already flickering light in your eyes went out, completely. Before i knew it, your amplification blue took away the whole ceiling and turned it into shambles. Those chipped pieces of wood and shattered pieces of glass held my gaze, as i saw, reflected in them, an image of us. Once strong, now cracked and split. It hurts, you know. Is this how it’s going to end? 

We still talked, but every word you said, every smile you flashed at me, your eyes remained void. Every joke you cracked, every prank you pulled, hollowness echoed after them. I could do nothing but leave you to wallow in your misery. After all, im not him. I cant get you to open up to me like you do with him. You need to know when it’s necessary to let things go, simply for the reason that they are heavy. Deep down, i believe that you havent lost who you are, you’re just different, and that’s okay. But it was painful, to see you like that. 

I stared at the image of you crouching over him, debating if i should disturb the moment. You said something, and he smiled, holding tightly onto his still bleeding shoulder. His lips moved, conveyed his last thoughts to you, then his arms slackened, and his head drooped. You remained there, saying nothing. Your blindfold was off, your shoulders were hunched, your jaw was clenched, and in those swirling shades of blue in your eyes, i could somehow only see emptiness. It wasent long before i had to step in. i was supposed to take care of his body’s disposal, after all. And before i could even touch him, you pushed me aside, with so much force that i almost fell. Your head turned, your eyes cast a piercing gaze at me, and those blue were no longer empty. In them, a whirlwind of emotions swirled, some of which i could not comprehend. How can i, anyway? When you never told me anything. I took that as my cue to leave. 

You and him fit each other perfectly, like yin and yang. Then… where am I? To you and him, what have i been this whole time? In some other life, we are standing side by side, and laughing at the fact that in some other life, we are apart. Gojo, Geto, i really hope that we will meet again, that in another life, our paths will cross again, not as Gojo, Geto, or Shoko, but 3 strangers that become the best of friends. Maybe in another life, our fates won’t be sealed and our destinies won’t be so complicated. Maybe in that other life, I will no longer feel invisible.

(😭😭😭its so sad that shoko stuck by toru and sugu all those times and shes like, so damn invisible. 'theres always a duo in a trio' 😢 i love her so much)

Anyways thanks for making it here!! Im the type that only writes when i feel really emo or when im free (student life's really busy :() so im not really active here BUT i appreciate any constructive feedback/criticism if any so pls do comment and TYSMMM FOR MAKING IT HERE 😍

#shoko ieiri #jujutsu kaisen #jjk shoko #satosugu #gege when i catch you gege #kfc breakup #geto suguru #gojo satoru #what am i even doing #i cannot do this anymore #depressing shit

[sawyer-is-eepy]

i like you, here are my favorite awesome and underrated outer wilds fic + comic recommendations in no particular order

interpolation by @tippertot . its got base game spoilers, possibly dlc spoilers? unfinished but it's currently being updated wooooo!!! it's very interesting and i dont exactly understand whats going on but i really like it and am SO excited to see where it goes. keep in mind i've only read up to chapter 9 so idk what comes in the other chapters. but its so so so good, i need to make fanart for it sometime wahh. (and of course. also finish catching lol.)

hearth's shadow by @spitzyyyy . got dlc and base game spoilers - only 2 chapters out but they're decently long(and very angsty) and it was last updated in january and im pretty sure spitzle is still writing other fics so even if they drop this one, im sure they've got plenty of other, very good ones too. this is just the only one that i've read from him (YET) it's very sad though so like. brace yourself. BUT CHAPTER 2 IS ALSO CUTE THOUGH SO ITS FINE

and uh also anything by @crimsonquill-086 is very good ::) i havent finished all their stuff yet but i think(so far) on my own terms is my fave.

also i read like one chapter of the rule of quantum certainty by TimeturnerJay(i don't *think* they have a tumblr? not sure) and i've been meaning to return to it so im gonna read it after i finish this post so there's also that!! chapter one was gut wrenching i needed a break lol /pos

then i cannot recommend elwensa's comics enough. she makes so many and they're all very good, some are sad and some are cute, and some have headcanons that i basically accept as canon now for literally no reason.

here's a whole timeline i found of a bunch of her comics that i *believe* is up to date -https://www.reddit.com/r/outerwilds/comments/18uuy7z/elwensa_ow_comics_grand_timeline/

she's also got an entire au called the legend of outer wilds that's basically just outer wilds but its zelda inspired and it's got a ton of cool concepts so like. its very good it has its own carrd check it out - https://tloow.carrd.co/

and if we're talking comics i of course can't just like, not mention @cobaltbluesu 's "thrill chasing." pretty sure he only recently posted chapter one so im not sure how much there will be in the future but definitely go check that out, their art is so so cool(and a big inspiration for me.)

feel free to reblog with any other recommendations there are so many but if you find something good please tell me

#outer wilds #outer wilds spoilers #outer wilds fanart #echoes of the eye #echoes of the eye spoilers #outer wilds fic #outerwilds #outer wilds hatchling #outer wilds protagonist #outer wilds nomai

[mxrisacoulter]

endless gifs of marisa coulter ~(33/?)

#mine* #egmc #hdm #his dark materials #hdmedit #mrs coulter #marisa coulter #ruth wilson #it has been SO long since ive done one of these holy moly #cant believe i havent done this scene before she was serving so hard here #its con in like a month and i was going to try and knock up a mrs c cosplay before then so ive been studying this costume #cause it feels like the most iconic #but also there is a hat and i can sew but idk how to make hats #so it feels like an objectively stupid choice #esp when i could do cittagazze safari costume or something and be comfortable all day #anyway thoughts and suggestions welcome? #also stopped doing edits cause my uni photoshop subscription ran out and i didnt want to pay but then i remembered not paying anyway <3 #also i can stand that my top posts are now all my stupid fucking textposts so here you are my loves

[opens-up-4-nobody]

Cyanobacteria my beloved 🖤

#who needs mood stablizers when u have access to a microscope and like 200 vials of goo #im only a lil kidding. i used to go transfer cultures when i was feeling really fucked up bc its like ok i have to focus #and i have to breathe for the 4hrs im sitting here. and i would go in at fucked up hours when i couldnt sleep #and i havent transfered anything for weeks and now im like oh right. my babies #i especially love when cyanobacteria r all chubby. rn its probably a sign that their nutrient levels r fucked up #bc theyve been in one tube too long but idk im delighted by fat filamentous cyanos. the colors make me happy #also true branching cyanos r so fucking beautiful. f1sherella my beloved 🖤🖤🖤 #listen. in my biased opinion nostocales r just thr fucking best. i dont want fucking cocci i want annoying filamentous who can differentiate #their cells. fucking wild. multicellular bacteria #cyanobacteria

[toastsnaffler]

in a hilarious turn of events my flatmate didn't even know I use any pronouns....

#i thought when she was talking abt how her parents thought i was gonna come out as trans and kept checking my name/pronouns- #that the joke was that im ALREADY trans but in ways they dont know abt.... but nope she genuinely didnt know 🤭 #to be fair. i dont rly let anyone in on my gender business unless we're close enough to be dating or its an anonymous online space #like im legally cis and thats fine. idc abt ppl using my name + she/her bc thats not my gender identity its just AN identity that i use- #to navigate the world without ppl being fucking nosy bc i pass as + am sociopolitically treated as a woman (if butch lol) #to ppl who are friends ill joke that my gender is dyke (true) and to friends whose gender falls on a similar spectrum- #or who are transmasc ill talk a little more honestly abt it bc theyre usually able to understand better than anyone else #other butch dykes w a weird gender going on are the only motherfuckers who actually Get It but theyre hard to come by tbh #to be frank i dont fucking know whats going on w my gender. and i dont rly care enough to do the introspection to figure it out rn #i have so many other problems in my life and im lucky that most of my beef w gender can be solved by presenting butch + binding #and using any pronouns around other queer ppl. its actually incredibly funny to me when ppl she/her me bc its like tch. this chump hasnt #unlocked my level of gender yet. pronouns and names in general are so far disconnected from the way i exist in the world... #its just smth thats fun for me to play around with + makes me feel weird sometimes but in ways i havent distilled yet yknow #and this has been my approach to gender for like?? 4-5 years now??? and likely will continue to be for a long while.. #anyway. its not actually that surprising my flatmate doesnt know bc shes cis so ive never felt compelled to have a deeper conversation #abt gender with her. but also i could sweeaaar its been mentioned bc almost all our other friends are trans lol #and also ive been introducing myself at queer sports socials w any pronouns and i swear i talked abt that w her..... whatever #and my pronouns are on discord and shes def seen my tumblr before but maybe i didnt have them in my bio at the time... i digress #i kind of prefer cis ppl she/hering me tbh. theyre not able to they them or he him or whatever else me in a way that matters..... #altho i do find it fascinating when she or other ppl elect to use neutral or masculine terms for me. raising an eyebrow and taking notes #like when she got a job and joked abt me being her househusband.. pulling up the fem/masc tally chart and chalking a line up #a la nona the ninth.... ive been trying to figure out whos inhabiting this body my entire fucking life with no luck girl #ANYWAY just smth to think abt. im so tired i think my brain is gonna start seeping out my eyeballs #im gonna watch some more pluto and read and then -> 🛌 #another 6:30 start tomorrow woohoo #.diaries #zzzzz

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so a non-welcome home related ask and i'm sorry if you already answered this before, but what got you into dragons? i'm slowly stalking through your tumblr and i can't help but admire how beautifully and effortlessly you draw the scaley fuckers (/pos) ✨

i've actually never gotten this question, so this is a delight! allow me to Overshare about this

i became interested in dragons at an early age - like, kindergarten / 1st grade age. i don't remember exactly how it started, but i think it was my fascination with dinosaurs, oddly enough? i've loved those guys since some of my earliest memories. it wasn't a big leap from "giant 'lizards' from our past" to 'even bigger mythological 'lizards' from always". the Hobbit and the first Temeraire (im trying to get my hands on the full series now actually) were read to me at this young age too, and the only parts i remember are the big dragon scenes lmao

i do know the ball Really got rolling with the first How To Train Your Dragon movie, which i saw in theaters in 2nd grade. INSTANT obsession with dragons. i'll never forget how it felt to see Toothless for the first time. but in general, i couldn't get enough of em. i made my own dragon manual, i got the Dragonology books, it was the whole enchilada!

then in 5th grade, i stumbled upon the newly released Wings Of Fire: The Dragonet Prophecy book! immediately fell in love with it. and its what pushed me to start actively pursuing art! and also what pushed me into my first online space: ~Deviantart~. i saw all of the amazing art of my favorite dragons and wanted in on it. i can actually pinpoint the main person who's art i loved and found inspiration in: someone named Liighty! i don't remember their user, it's probably changed in the many years since. i loved their stuff and wanted nothing more than to be able to draw like them

long story short, i've been in love with dragons for the majority of my life. HTTYD and WOF have been my biggest inspirations and fuel to the fire, and my first delve into the internet pushed me to start drawing dragons (specifically wof) like my life depended on it. i haven't looked back since!

#and thank you <3 scribbling them does not feel effortless in the least <3 they fight me at every turn <3 #and it has taken me so so long to get where i am in terms of skill. i still have a long ways to go but my fucking god #also i do not Ever mind non-welcome home asks ahaha #this blog isnt technically a WH blog! thats just my main fixation at present #eventually ill chill the fuck out and go back to primarily posting dragons / original creations #eventually.... #not anytime soon given that The Update is soon and that'll just rev me the fuck up but yk yk #rambles from the bog #i should dig through all of my old sketchbooks for a trip down memory lane... #i still have my very first one. ive havent thrown a single one away #in fact i should have some of my first wof drawings somewhere round here.... #i like archiving my artistic journey #but yeah! httyd dragonology and wof! my historic big three! #i actually own every single one of the wof books (except for the latest) and they have their own shelf #my original copy of the first book is still there. in a plastic bag. bc its been loved to hell and back & half of it is falling off #and its not just books lmao i have so much dragon Stuff #trinkets and plushes and pictures (oh my!) #my room is Decked Out in em #theyre just so neat... #started from the bottom and now im here (so many worldbuilding documents and endless sketch pages. and brainrot)

[silenthillbunni]

🤧🐀🌧️🌊

#need to clear my head; #im in such a bad mood. my face is in a perpetual angry state. im just so so bitter nd pessimistic rn #trying not to get stuck in negative chaos thought spirals nd to just take it as it come #nd be patient bc recovery takes time i know. but i havent been able to feel healthy or functional for 7 months nd i am so tired #i cant help but worry abt my health nd what kinda diet i can have nd how to work all of that out. #like the removal of the gallbladder dont ensure a good digestive system. they remove it bc it can irrepairably hurt u #also im so so stressed out abt school nd my courses. i already had to drop one last week. nd it isnt looking like i'll be able to pass my #eng class.. it just isnt looking like it's realistic at all :/ i personally dont mind if i fail. but i can get issues w my wellfare hmm #bc like im still feeling rough nd u only get sick leave for one week after surgery.. so i have to go on thursday nd friday but im gnna #be in pain plus be so hungry nd be unable to concentrate idk #idk idk!! im already willing to take out loans to finish my upper secondary school.. but i have to make it work w timing nd stuff so im not #sitting here unable to pay rent or the bills or food lmao. so idk have to fix it somehow #nd the pressure of this country rapidly declining state is stressing me tf out!! having nazi conservative rightists in the ruling is just #dreadful!!!! for many reasons but atm idek if i can do distance classes like i wanted to :// #i just.. wanna be able to go for my long walks. go to the gym. eat normally. have coffee. study nd finish highschool. #then apply for whatever program i can nd move to another calmer city. prob eventually find a path to move to another country. like norway.. #im thinking too much but my thoughts are spinning nd killing me like i cant stop it im so scared nd anxious lmao 💀 #im also trying to be brave and write to the psych clinic for personality disorders nd be upset nd 'beg' them for help ksksksks. #but like... the thing abt having avpd is that i kinda dont wanna bc im scared of the possibility of them helping me lol #im just in a low place nd bad headspace and it's just getring worse nd im getting more nd more tired #i dont have much more energy to keep it together nd pretend like im ok or like i have hope lmaoooo idk what to do #anyway... idk idk guess i just gotta .. keep crawling forward anyway i can

[itslookingback]

good night gay little people in my laptop

#i have had a quiet night in and it's been good 👍 #got to wake up early tomorrow............ big day......... #every day is a big day when you love your degree 👍 #i had my first major anxiety spiral of ''omg why am i at uni and not. idk. a librarian or something'' #and then went outside and immediately snapped out of it because i was too distracted by !!!!!outside!!!! #so anyway i'm all good again. #this might just be me but... i feel like because i hang out with people that also want to work with environment #it becomes a sort of competition of. who does the most volunteering. who is the most eco friendly. etc. #which sounds stupid!!!! #and obviously it's not a competition!!! #but idk. sometimes i speak to people and i feel like i'm constantly behind. or maybe that's just the autism #and it doesn't help that if you want to get a job in conservation / whatever it's so competitive and they want so much experience from you #like that just adds to the stress to the point of you're worrying am i not going to get a good job because i havent got a summer placement #or whatever the fuck. anyway i need to sleep #if you've read this long.. congrats!! here is your medal 🥇

[cloudbells]

I'm sorry I gave everyone the impression that I was gonna be active allie when I first joined this fandom 😔🙏🏿 I planned on it but I should have warned the masses that my life often loves to backhand me away from my interest.

#me my mine #TMI i joined therapy again recently and it's taking up all my mental energy and im trying not to quit it 😩🤞🏿 #when i die the first thing im gonna do is rip god's throat out with my teeth for giving me all these PROBLEMS 🤣 #shower thought of a (culturally) christian #also my name is not allie i just wanted the alliteration #i actually dont mind giving out my real name if i havent already but i feel like people would be uncomfortable with it #for reasons that are too long to tag but anyways im 99% sure ive said my actually name here at least 7 times #also in case it wasn't clear im not really christian #i grew up as an evangelical yes but it's been so long since me and my family have been active in religion #my dad likes to call us “spiritual” now #you may be thinking “user cloudbells whu do you overexplain so much when you're inactive for more than a coupoe weeks?” #and to that i answer “still working that out”

[girlcrushau]

#me? about to use tumblr as a diary again? in 2024? unfortunately:/ #but here have a waterfall i saw on a hike last week as payment #i am sO tired and exhausted emotionally after dating #there's this guy that i fr thought was going to last and be around for a long time. we spent like every moment together that we could for 2 #months straight and if we werent physicaly together we were texting or calling or on ft . just every part of our day had the other in it #not once did i ever feel unwanted undesired or uncared for. not once did i feel that i wasnt sure of his intentions. i felt safer with him #in those 2 months than i ever did with any one else i could think to compare to. #until one day he just didnt think it important to communicate any more. after 3 days of nearly nothing .. hardly any talking . i asked if #he was ok if we were ok. what was going on in his head. he said some ive just been with my buddies and family and havent been on my phone #and just. immediately thats heartbreak yanno. thats :// thats what they say when theres a new girl. but there'd never been a reason to think #there was another girl so i was like ok we're gonna trust bc this dude has been So good in every way. so i said imy but i understand. enjoy #your time with your buddies and with your fam -- i cant wait to hear about it (and hold you) #and i havent heard from him in the 3 weeks since. just randomly #so last night #i send the dreaded 'i miss you' text. #i dont expect to hear back and i accept the hurt that will come with that and the confusion that i've felt settles deeper into my heart #until this afternoon i hop on ig and see a hard launch that was posted an hour after my text was sent #that shit kinda hurt different. but also sent me into a bit of a delirious state where all i could do is laugh bc are you for fucking real #did she see my message? i know it. bc i know him and i know that he wouldnt hide anything from the person he's giving his heart #and his softness to. i can almost imagine how he showed her and promised her theres nothing to worry about #and there really isnt anything to worry about because he genuinely is the type to give his all to the relationship he's in #which feels silly to say after what happened w us. like no there wasnt a title ever #it sucks to call it a situationship because a month ago we were laughing in bed together about how we could never bc we were all in. #just the timing of the hard launch makes me giggle. did my text push them to have a conversation about what they are. was she really the #reason that he went away on me. #im trying not to blame myself . trying not to think about the phone calls i didnt answer. about what i could have done differently. trying #not to think about where we would be if i didnt let my anxieties hold me back. if i wasnt scared about what he'd think of the parts of me #that i keep hidden just a little bit longer than the rest. #and at the same time im trying not to put him on a pedestal. but that pedestal is just where i wholeheartedly believe he belongs #he set the bar for me. he set the standard. i was never too much. i was never too little. he made me feel perfect just as i am

[thecherrygod]

/

#my posts #you know how this usually goes #i make an amount of tags so that if you read this its bc you've clicked and its not bc i am just posting it like whatever lmao #... unsure if i should even post it tho but what else do i do just leave it in my brain? idk maybe its the same maybe its better #maybe its worse? .... why have i been feeling kind of like this and at this kind of intensity for like about 2 weeks or more #2 weeks is how long ive been properly aware so i think its more but like. man. #like maybe its been like a month and i just havent been keeping track of time bc january is way too long to even try lmao #. but. idk. i just wish i could be kinda.. stable. like i cant feel good lmao #like it truly doesn't matter nothing is good enough in general #what i do isnt good enough #what goes on around me doesnt help trying to ignore the constant.. dread? #and like all things considered i should be doing good currently #or at least not this bad #but here i am constantly trying to not let myself feel too bad until im alone bc man. #so... yeah it just doesnt feel like anything is truly worth it not me as a person nor the things i do nor the things i experience lmao #also lately ive been just feeling more..... disconnected to others... like i dont understand them and they dont understand me #but like.. more than usual #and i guess its me? that it's kind of a me problem #idk I'm just tired. i need to sleep. i want to let face down on some sort of big water body or do something that will make my life worse #or they i will regret lmao #i. wont do any of those #also when i mean face down in some sort of bldy of water or whatever i dont necessarily mean like die #not against it but its not the only option #just lay there and float..... also not against it #i just want something that i cant have i guess bc im not sure what it is #like i just know what i want is to not constantly feel like this but idk how lmao #... u would sleep if i can bc man also I'm so tired #.... adding tags its a bit worse than I assumed lmao im also thinking about wether i deserve stuff or not lmao #like it got windy and cooler and i was like 'a blanket by my legs would be nice' only to be like 'no you don't deserve that ' like ah yeah #its kinda worse than i thought lmao

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#ugh. im so tried. why is crying so exhausting? i havent done anything. this is bullshit #we went from a slow motion breakdown to full on freakout meltdown today #luckily no one was around in the lab this morning bc i couldnt stop crying #so i went to the counseling center and made myself their problem #canceled my committee meeting. which everyone tells me is fine. its all fine #think about going home for a while they say. maybe tell ur dad ur having a bad time thry say #but im so tired. and i dont kno what to do and its all falling apart #i just feel like im brushing up against the limits of what i can do intellectually and its like well where do i go from here? #what do i do with my old data? how do i move my project forward? whats the point of any of this? #why did i put myself in this position? would taking a leave even help? id still have to come back to the same mess #its just so frustrating bc theres no solution ill find satisfying. everything just sucks. #idk what my advisor even told my committee. bc we were supposed to meet tomorrow morning. ugh. it would have been so bad #it also sucks bc im so drained that i can just feel my own weight when im trying to talk to ppl #like u kno when ur being a wet blanket but u dont kno how to fix it. like srry my vibes r wretched. maybe im just stuck like this #i dunno. my dad invited us home for a week in july and also plans to come out to visit me in August. but that seems like a long time away #i dunno what im gonna do. what a disaster #unrelated

[risingsunresistance]

#aaaaaaugh dude I MISS HIM i dont know what to say that hasnt already been said #but posting is so hard talking about him is so hard #every day i wait for his youtube to post a new video or for the technodad account to be like 'LOL YOU NERDS ACTUALLY FELL FOR IT' #he was just playing a long-con prank and It'll Be Fine and he just wanted to distract us while he worked on some new insane project #how am i still fully in denial 5 months later. it's almost been half a year #i cant watch his videos anymore. it was easy the 1st week and then it was impossible then it was easy again now it's impossible again #drawing in general is hard bc he was all i was drawing. he still is but im drawing WAY less and with pretty much no passion behind it #cant draw stuff for myself i just wanna draw him. partly bc of him but also bc that's where i made all my friends with you guys :( #i dont wanna go back to what i used to do. i wanna stay here. but it's really hard #i know i dont *have* to make my own posts and i can just reblog and ramble n stuff but. it feels weird not to #i save all my favorite things here. there's still clips i havent taken. art i havent made. fics i've never wrote (and never will lol) #i dont WANT to stop. it's hard to force myself to get back into it tho. there's no easy way to talk about him #it feels borderline unhealthy trying to keep it up #but i keep going into swings of ''i love it here so much i love you guys'' and ''i cant keep going im not strong enough'' #so like. which is it. what's REALLY wrong??? i wish i could just go back to how things were aaaaa #idk what i mean by that really. just wish i could find some normalcy in it all whatever that would mean for me #idk if my issue is Him Being Dead or trying to run a blog for a guy who died. some combination. some secret third thing. augh #chat #tw death

[8aji]

im a lil embarrassed that most of the posts ive posted (duh) as of late were text posts abt me being sick LMFAO n it feels silly to write this but i think i may log out of this acc for a lil while at least on mobile <3

#not being able to write is making me feel a lil dizzy dizzy #a lil embarrassed a lil 'i do not belong' ya know??? #hm yeah i also need to get off my phone bc i start uni next week and i need to wake up early and im soooo stressed bc of another uni thingy #so...i will be deactivating 😔👊 #im joking im joking #ofc i wont deactivate i think my shrink would kill me if i did anyway /hj #she was the once that convinced me to make the writing blog #but rn the internet doesnt feel good to me and i need to be more present and more real and prioritise other aspects of my life #i wanna be more stable and journal and move my body and read books bc i like the feeling of the paper and and #i had the sweetest ask ever about my book recs and i was also a lil embarrassed to respond bc im not much of a reader but i try TT #anyway !! aside from this mildly incoherent ramble which i loved writing ngl #i havent been writing a lot and i think ive lowkey un-hyperfixated on tr and jjk so the inspo isnt inspoing #and tbh that feels a lil awful to say bc tr has taught me so many things and helped me grow and im so painfully in love with shin but idk #idk what happened i think i just hit a lil bump in the road of life and the stress has me focused more on real life and other things than #my darling beloveds. and im sure itll pass like most things in life i will feel good again #but rn it doesnt. i havent even caught up with the latest ep of tr :') but nonetheless writing is one of my truest loves as well #so i will comeback hopefully with a few stories mapped out including a lil gojo series and all that fun jazz :D #i have shin naoto izana gojo and toji in store !! and tbh im not ready to just leave them all behind #ANYWAY OKAY this' gone for too long LMFAO but thank u if u read till here i think i needed to rant #that means ill probably be less active than im already am but ill be back !! #still i dont think this exactly qualifies as a hiatus so i wont mark it down as such wait is this a semi-hiatus??? lmfao idk but eh 🤷‍♀️ #i love love love love love yall so so so much and forevever and always will #MWAH #<3

[pearlcscent]

feeling like creating some npcs for idolverse...

#dont have the time or energy to work on existing ocs atm but i love making a pinterest section! #i reworked amore's discog a little and now i just wanna see the group filled up #i dont think i have it in me to create everybody but maybe a couple of npcs for amore and one or two for wndr #the only thing is that i feel like i've used all my favourite korean names and finding one that clicks takes so long #just gonna have some fun over on pinterest i suppose #also i think my queue is running out and i havent been here that much to fill it up so rip to that 🥲 #i've been living on pinterest for the last couple of months #isa.txt

[klonoadoortophantomile]

cannot believe that slime rancher 2 came out and i still havent been able to play the first one despite literally owning it <//3

#MY FRIEND BOUGHT IT FOR ME YEARS AGO I JUST HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO PLAY IT AT ALL #my dad has download restrictions on the computer becuz he doesnt want my siblings doing anything stupid or me doing shit without his #permission (which i still manage to do anyways cuz theres a ton of loopholes in the restriction stuff lmao) but the download restrictions. #theres no getting around them. so i cant get steam to play the games my friend bought me for my brithday a few years ago #and i cant ask my dad if i can download steam becuz hed just tell me 'make sure your grades are good first' #and man these past years. have been really fucking rough. in general but especially when it comes to school/my grades #i dont know how ive managed to pass these past few years it honestly feels like i shouldnt have. #thats kinda besides the point sorry. but not only thst hes also going to get mad at me for making a steam account behind his back probably #and also ITS BEEN YEARS like how am i suppsoed to jus ask now its been so fucking long. god #hopefully i can manage to get my grades up in time for my brithday this year and i can just. lie somehow and convince him that my friend #got me them this year. becuz the games she got me. MAN theyre games ive been wanting to play for ages now #inquisitivewaltz.txt #okay sorry im just rambling here. tldr my dad sucks <//3 #vent #I GUESS????? #idk just in case i guess