#but hearing how people constantly have negative opinions about things they like BECAUSE of a fandom

[smiggles]

.

#i have never been a fandom person #it just never like #was something i thought about doing? joining “fandoms” #i dont even really know what exactly it means tbfh #i consume things by myself and thats about it #but hearing how people constantly have negative opinions about things they like BECAUSE of a fandom #why?? #whats the benefit #i dont understand it #all i hear is shit like #i liked this character before fandom ruined them!!! #or i liked this media before fandom harassed me!! #wtf is going on with that shit are you guys ok?? tf?

[kaijuposting]

"Saw traps for people with moral OCD" is a phrase that has embedded myself into my brain because, well, Saw traps for people with moral OCD are everywhere.

Stuff that basically amounts to...

"You have to listen to my opinions on [issue], or else you don't care about [issue]. (Constantly talks about how people like you are the absolute worst.)"

Anything that's functionally like, "you have to let me tear you down over things you can't control or you're a bad person."

Anything that's functionally like, "you have to let me vent to you whenever and however I want or else you're a bad person."

"If you enjoy X media/trope, you just hate Y people."

"Everyone knows that X thing is harmful/hateful; if you engaged in it, it's just because you were fine with perpetuating hate/harm."

"You should have just known better/should know this already!"

This thread over here talks about the inherent issues of putting this kind of stuff out there. The TL;DR is that it really only works on people who are mentally unwell and have poor boundaries, while just pissing off everyone else. It really doesn't matter if you're technically correct; you're still attacking people, and that means they're not wrong to block you.

I think that many of these Saw traps are created when people effectively write posts directed toward people who don't want to help, rather than the ones who do. Like, if you catch yourself writing an angry, shame-laden post, ask yourself: who are you writing it for and what are the odds you're going to change their minds? If your mental image is some smug fuck or angry reactionary, you're writing for the wrong person. Write for the person who's curious, who's willing to learn.

Also? Work on figuring out how to transmute negative feelings into positive, encouraging rhetoric. EG:

"Why is there no X positivity?" -> "Let's hear it for X!"

"No one cares about Y problem!" -> "Hey, we need more recognition of Y problem" or "I haven't seen many people talking about Y problem, so here's some info on what's up."

"If you don't reblog this, you don't care about [group]" -> "Please reblog this, it would mean a lot for us [group]."

And if you're really super duper frustrated and want to vent with a lot of nasty words and sentiments? Consider taking it to a private vent channel or a journal or somewhere that a stranger with moral OCD/scrupulosity isn't likely to run across it.

Remember, most people don't want to hurt anyone. More people are ignorant than malicious. People naturally want to do the right thing, so if you feel like you have to guilt them or shame them into it, there's probably a fundamental communication issue somewhere, or they simply lack the context to understand why what you're saying is so important.

#moral ocd #mental health #mental illness #ableism #scrupulosity #scrupulosity ocd #abuse #emotional abuse #communication

[ooctlt]

I really like this blog most of the time, but sometimes you take reasonable earnest asks that are trying to be thoughtful, and are such a dick about it.

Like if it's the characters being dicks, fine. But you could say something in the tags or post to indicate you're not just viciously mocking someone for trying to engage.

I still haven't submitted an ask since seeing your response that led to comments along the lines of "anon should go die in a hole" for asking, pretty reasonably, why harrow would want to stay with people she didn't seem to like or want to be around or interact with.

(i know, because she does like them and does want them around but doesn't know how to show it) but it's an ASK blog. How do we hear that from her unless someone ASKS

i understand it might be surprising and a bit hurtful to see an ask answered with the characters being mean/flippant, and for that i do apologize that it wasnt made clear that it would be a common thing in this blog. id like to issue the disclaimer: there is always the possibility that the characters here will not take your question well. they might answer rudely, and instigating behavior is not only encouraged but expected on both ends. this does not reflect my personal opinions as the artist; there are over 250 asks even after i constantly compile duplicates, and i will answer the asks that i personally like.

i will assume you are referencing the two most recent posts where gideon acts rudely and i repost an old panel: for the former i thought anon was really sweet for being so heartfelt and encouraging, but gideon isnt the kind of person who needs to be told shes brave for doing that by a stranger. it was a simple act of survival. and harrow is still very much in the passive deprogramming phase. the latter response was meant to kickstart (spoilers) what i will call the "dicks last resort" arc, where i clean out the inbox and share more simple, low effort, but potentially rude responses*. this is because i have roughly drawn almost daily for 87 days straight, and would like to recuperate without being burnt out because i love this blog and i love art.

this leads me to my next point: some of these answers will be curt and short and rude, because they are easy to draw. if i only prioritized the "good" asks or to make certain ask responses kinder, or longer, it wouldnt be a daily blog. it would be a monthly blog where 5 asks get answered among 100s. i didnt anticipate people asking about harrows piercings, and i considered shutting it down by just having harrow say she likes them etc. but i did want to give more insight into harrows character even if she wouldnt say so herself, and that took roughly 3 full unemployed nights. if i treated every ask in good faith the same way i wouldnt have time for anything else, because they take more effort and have to be seriously considered for the future. i can retcon their favorite ice cream or play off griddlehark fighting - it takes more to keep track of a narrative about people talking Around their issues

* by rude responses i mean "this will affect the 679ers negatively, much like making your sim 🧑‍🤝‍🧑➖➖ someone" there are a few asks planned to hurt in the same way one drafts a bad end in a visual novel, and this type of interaction is encouraged. of course if you dont want them to get worse dont send asks telling gideon she should flirt with MILFs (you cant send this ask now i already said it), but i encourage the banter.

TL;DR this is the "characters think you are weird for personal questions" blog. i am sorry i didnt warn of the ask-response banter, because i also enjoy drawing these characters being dicks. i do like when aggravation and conflict leads to character development. "how do we get earnest answers unless someone asks" sometimes you will never explicitly get that from them, and thats what the dead ends are for: to let you know to try something else and read between the lines

#the reason why i did not say anything sooner is because i do not like making ooc posts on here often. i want a little intrigue and mystery #i dream of when people will actively discuss in tags and notes how best to confront these characters #actual ooc #and i will say. i will not remember to indicate in the tags that i am not mocking the ask every time #i cannot be responsible for managing everyones feelings if they are hurt that harrowhark or gideon reacted badly #which i have seen people do! in the notes saying that gideons behavior makes them hate her a little! good! #if you dont like the direction this blog turns then i would encourage you to interact selectively

[amuseoffyre]

Mulling on the way Stede and Ed have both learned to talk around their desires and wishes, whether as a defence mechanism or because past experience has made them cautious about expressing themselves. This has led them to have very different ways of saying what they need in very carefully constructed way and sometimes, missing what the other is saying entirely.

Since it got long, I'll show mercy :)

I've written before about the way Stede leans into the passive voice in season one. He doesn't directly express an opinion, coming at it from the side so he can't be blamed if it's a bad suggestion.

A prime example is when he tries to dissuade Ed from going to the party by describing how bad it'll be (from his perspective) or when Ed's considering leaving and instead of asking him to stay, he says Ed doesn't need to rush off and "we're all enjoying your company".

Based on his past experience, it's no small wonder, when his every suggestion to his father was shot down with scorn and disdain. His likes and interests were mocked relentlessly and constantly criticised. Even Mary shouted at him about the ship which - he thought - was his idea of the best future for him with his family. For him, expressing how he's feeling is something that can be weaponised against him.

He not only hides his feelings, but when he's feeling especially bad, he hides himself as well. He leaves situations when he's distressed or unhappy: leaving his family, hiding in his cabin in 1x01, retreating in the party in 1x05, going back to the ship in 1x08, returning home in 1x09.

The one time he does express himself verbally to Ed, before the academy, he's mid-retreat to the ship. He's angry and upset and insulted by Calico Jack and is taking himself elsewhere, but Ed stops him and says he should stay.

And this is where I chew on their communication mismatches, because Stede has been sitting and sitting and sitting all day, all the negative stuff building, stoked by Jack's cheerfully applied passive aggression and manipulation. He's been smiling through it for Ed's sake and when he loses his temper, he falls into the same pattern of not being direct. He doesn't point the finger at Jack for his behaviour, which has been the trigger the whole time. He tells Ed "I don't like who you are around this guy", his focus being 'this guy' who has caused this change in Ed's behaviour.

But Ed hears it as something being wrong with him specifically. He doesn't hear that it's Jack's influence of behaviour. His own self-esteem is so brittle, he immediately takes this as being fully his fault and when he's given the choice to stay with Stede or go with Jack, he leaves and says "You were always going to see what I am."

This not only cements Stede's conviction that saying what he thinks aloud will get a negative response (in this case, Ed leaving), but also solidifies the fact that Ed is fully convinced that Stede would eventually come to dislike him as much as Ed dislikes himself. Neither of them said what the other thinks they said, but because it's informed by their own trauma and issues, they radically misinterpret the other's meaning.

Like Stede, Ed edges around directness as much as he possibly can. Given what we've seen of the people from his past, it's clear that honesty and earnestness are subject to mockery at best and, at worst, the thing he cares about will be taken away from him.

Instead, to avoid the risk of that, he tends to drop hints, make roundabout suggestions, uses metaphors and allegories, and tries to nudge people to understanding what he means/wants.

He doesn't want to leave but doesn't know if he's welcome to stay, so he just makes noises that he's thinking about moving on so an invitation will be extended. He doesn't care about the invitation to the party, but maybe, pfft, not like he's bothered, but they could go. Whatever.

If it does get to a point where he's upset he - like Stede - will try to remove himself from a situation and hide away. It happens in 1x06 during the fuckery, 1x10 inside the pillow fort, 2x04 at Mary and Anne's.

It's very telling that the times he does let his guard down a bit, it's when someone goes after him. He and Stede have their most direct conversations when Ed is hiding under a yellow blanket, even if Stede is still bemused by the 'doggy heaven' metaphor.

A lot of the time they're both like ships passing in the night when it comes to communicating because they're both trying so hard not to show too much vulnerability. It's there on the beach at the naval academy when Stede tries to deflect Ed from China by pointing out "it's quite far". It's there in Ed's fishing metaphor which has so many layers and Stede has no idea wtf is going on because he has none of the context.

Stede has learned to be more direct in S2, so much more so that he actually expresses his feelings and emotions aloud for the first time. He talks about it with Lucius, Zheng and Anne, even before he and Ed have their breakthrough in 1x04 when, at Anne and Mary's, Stede frankly and directly explains himself to Ed and it helps them get back on an even keel.

Ed isn't quite there yet, though, and this is why the fall out in 1x07 comes out of nowhere for Stede because he's missing a lot of the information that Ed has threaded into the metaphor.

He knows Ed doesn't want to be a pirate, but the subtext all through the fisherman conversation is like they're having two different conversations. Stede is being so much more direct by pointing out that Ed is panicking and offering options, but Ed is deflecting as a defence again.

What's lovely is that by the final scene, they're sort of getting to the same page. Awkwardly, tripping each other up a bit on the way, but they're getting there, realising there's a lot more to each other than they had understood before. The entire exchange has so much layered into it.

Stede: so we're innkeepers now? Ed: I thought we could give it a go. Unless you're having second thoughts. Stede: I'm not. Ed: It's a bit of a shithole. Stede: It's a fixer-upper. Good bones.

On one hand, it's about the building and oh the symbolism of him wanting to make a place where people choose to stay with him is aaaaaa.

On the other hand, it's both about Ed himself and their relationship. Ed couching his meaning in metaphors again and this time, Stede picks up the meaning, even if he doesn't fully get all the nuances of it. (also teehehehe 'good bones'. I bet there are)

They're working their way towards better communication, a little bit at a time. They've both had their lowest ebb, run in panic, and learned from it. There's still a lot of trauma and defence mechanisms to unpick, but they're getting there.

Now if Stede could stop bottling up his trauma and hiding them in his wine-cellar of the things, that'd be great.

#ofmd #ofmd meta #ed teach #blackbeard #stede bonnet #adopt our crew

[dez-wade]

I’m trying really hard not to like get genuinely upset or pissed off by this and I kind of want to hear someone else’s opinion and you’re always willing to discuss some of the more “negative” aspects of what’s happening which I appreciate! Somebody being upset or frustrated doesn’t give them the right to behave in certain way or say certain things and then just have everyone be like “oh but he’s had a hard few days and he’s frustrated 🥺” bad is a fully grown man. He should be able to handle genuine criticism and for him to sit there and say “no but the words we use are important Tina” all obnoxious when Tina was telling him FOR HIS OWN GOOD to not get all worked up and mixed up in exact definition and terminology that Etoiles was using to describe what happened to him. Etoiles called it a bug. Etoiles is also not a native English speaker yet he CONSTANTLY goes out of his way to speak English to his friends INCLUDING BAD just for bad to be all “well the exact language he uses matters” No it doesn’t. not in this situation it’s doesn’t. Let’s see bad sit and discuss something in French and then be told “well actually the exact wording you use matters so I’m going to just continuously go on and on about why you are in fact wrong because you used one word incorrectly” I’m sorry but he’s trying his best to ACCOMMODATE YOU!!! As someone who’s first language is French it’s just really upset me and I really enjoy bads content so it’s just gotten to me even more than usual

Yeah, it thought he contesting what Etoiles was saying it wasn't the right thing. A lot of times Bad, and most English speakers tbh, think they're on the same level in English which isn't the case.

Forever had trouble with this a lot of time with him, and started speaking Portuguese out of spite in one of their discussions.

Fit, who said "disengage" yesterday and Etoiles didn't understand making these two separate and Etoiles die.

It's not out of malice, but they forget how privileged they are and that people are communicating with them in their second language. Semantics really didn't matter right there. And Tina was right to try to not make him dig himself deeper.

At least he seemed to understand in the end, because it took Tubbo, to explain to him what it was. And he even suggested to report the bug when Tubbo talked about how something similar happened to him and Pac in the toxic gas event, so the admins won't only fix the quicksand one.

I think BBH viewers (I watched BBH a lot, now not so much) are kinda used to when goes in his "explanation" mode and starts using metaphors, analogies, and explains pretty much the same thing like 10x times using different words. So I was not really surprised when he started talking about that. That's just his personality, I guess.

But Bad really should be more conscious when he's talking to people whose first language isn't English and less over-focused on small, irrelevant things.

#qsmp #bbh neg #just in case #qsmp discourse

[stealanity]

hey guys, let's go for a big announcement okay?

so, we're near my three-year anniversary on this blog. the 13th of march will mark the day i posted my first piece of writing on this platform (color palette will forever be my precious baby). and before i say anything about the negative aspects of this post, i would like to thank all the people who have supported me and my work for years / months now. every time i received a little interaction, a little message in my askbox, or feedback about one of my writings, my heart couldn't help but vibrate with happiness. so, i'd like to extend my warmest thanks to everyone who kindly took the time to express their opinions on what i've written over the past three years, these little words mean so much to me, in ways you can't imagine.

and, this is where i'm going to start talking about the negative things i have to say about this post : i'm wondering if i'm going to continue writing and posting here.

for months i've been thinking of closing this blog and stopping writing : as most of you know, tumblr writers complain a lot about the lack of feedback on what we produce. i don't mean to blame you all, but it's a real problem that never ceases to discourage every writer behind the computer. i understand that some of you are shy, and that's perfectly all right : but the askbox anonymity option doesn't exist for nothing. even if you only come to say "your last writing was great" and you think it's lame to leave a message just to say that, tell yourself that this simple little sentence can brighten a writer's day. i know you hear the same thing over and over again, but if a lot of people are talking about it, don't you think that proves that it's a real problem for us?

in other words, the lack of interaction from readers to writers is the biggest pet peeve of writers on this platform. just imagine : you walk into a store, and a writer is alone at his signing table, no one stopping to listen to him talk about the book he wrote with all his heart, sleepless nights spent writing, all so that no one would stop and take an interest in him. how would you feel about this person? you'd be sad and sorry for him, right? well then, tell yourself that, it's exactly like this writer, that we here, as tumblr writers, feel when no one gives us feedback. you feel ignored. we give our time to offer you something to read about your favs, completely free of charge. we give you the opportunity to imagine scenarios, and ask us to write down your ideas precisely, all so that, when your request is granted, we have no feedback on what you thought about it? this won't last much longer, believe me — because little by little, all the writers here are losing hope and patience, and deciding to stop doing what they love just because they're constantly ignored and not thanked for their work and efforts. yet, i know a lot of writers who deserve to be praised and complimented for their talent every second of their existence, and i feel so, so sorry for them that they have to endure such a thing. and, if you look closely, you'll see that it's only the writers themselves who leave feedback on other writers' work — because we know how important it is and how much we need it every day.

which is why i'm announcing today that i'm questioning the future of this blog. i haven't made a decision yet, maybe i'll do it tomorrow or in three months, whatever. but the problem is there, said and repeated, over and over again, and i'm more than discouraged.

nevertheless, thank you to all the writers on this platform for all you do. you sometimes make my heart skip a beat, my eyes water, laugh until i cry and smiling from ear to ear, because you're that good. you're so good at giving people chills and filling their heads with stories, with your perfectly chosen words and your marvelous ideas, each more incredible and interesting than the last. and i'll never stop complimenting the talent of the writers here, because you guys are truly amazing and tumblr wouldn't be the same without you. i know it's hard to evolve here, but know that among all those likes, there's this one reblog that makes all the difference.

you are so brave, and i thank you for always being here to share your talent.

anyway, let's end it here !

thank you for your attention, have a nice day, or night, or anything,

— xoxo, matty

[chaifootsteps]

It’s almost not funny anymore seeing Viv fly off the handle over random Twitter users having even mildly negative opinions about her show. It just paints a deeply sad and almost tragic—if you leave out the part where she’s awful and did this to herself—picture of a person in free fall. As other anons have pointed out, she’s running around the glove on these expensive vacations, constantly treating herself, basically living in a dream world. And yet she’s still fixated on the opinions of people who ought to be inconsequential to her. Getting more and more unhinged by the day.

I can’t say I necessarily have sympathy for her? Like I said she’s pretty much got no one but herself to blame. But it’s objectively kind of sad just how far she’s fallen, and Hazbin isn’t even out yet. She had everything once, and it’s all slipping away from her now because she lacks the basic human decency to be good to the people around her.

I think part of her kind of sees the writing on the wall, but her ego is just so overwhelming that it drowns out whatever logic or common sense she’s got left. That’s why she’s lashing out more and more. Her sandcastle is eroding more and more by the day and she doesn’t know what to do, so she just keeps lashing out and hoping if she ignores the problem it’ll go away.

Key word being almost for me, but yeah, I agree. If she were slightly less awful, had slightly less power, it would be pretty sad.

She's gotten away with this for a lot longer than most people would have, and I think you're right, that at least part of her knows the salad days are coming to an end. She probably knows better than anyone else how bad things are, the exact details of Hazbin's troubled production, and is trying to live it up while she can -- before January, before July, before the NDAs start expiring. But even on a dream vacation to Japan with her friends, she can't resist angrily tweeting about a video that poked extremely lighthearted fun at her shows.

She could turn it all around tonight if she could just break away from the voices telling her what she's always wanted to hear, that she's gifted and brilliant and that all her critics are unfunny homophobic prudes who hate women. But she doesn't want to do that.

#Anonymous #vivziepop #vivziepop critical #actual blog post

[theconstitutionisgayculture]

Really hate how fragility has become a virtue. No one wants to toughen up and learn to healthily handle negative emotions or physical hardships. Instead the first sign of adversity is a sign to give up. Actually, it's even worse than that. Because the adversity is greeted like an old friend. Too many people these days want to be disadvantaged, or oppressed, or threatened. So much so that they'll pretend minor inconveniences are Life Threatening Trauma because trauma is now an all purpose shield. Oppression is an all purpose shield. Illness, mental or physical, is an all purpose shield. The people who throw the loudest tantrum are the ones who get coddled the most. That's why certain people scream racism when they get called out on being assholes. That's why certain people scream transphobia when they hear an opinion they don't like. It's because the culture we have now in the west is all about wildly exaggerating problems and being overtly performative about how we "solve" those problems. It's all a show. You're all performing your roles perfectly. And don't you dare think otherwise. You are a performer. Even if you know you're faking and you think you're directing your own show, you're still the performer. But do you wanna know who is directing?

Politicians and the billionaires you claim to hate along with the media who enables them.

Because this society benefits them the most. Yeah, sure, you guys can get a few people fired for expressing an opinion and you might get away with some shitty behavior before your friends and family get wise to you and stop wanting anything to do with you, but that's all you get. And the trade offs?

You have zero ability to be self-sufficient. And I'm not talking about living off the land like a pioneer here. I'm talking basic life skills like cooking and talking on the phone and having manners and holding down jobs and making a budget.

You're scared all the time. You think everyone around you is out to get you unless they loudly and constantly proclaim that they aren't. You think death and assault is around every corner and the only way you can ever feel safe is to give up your rights to the very same people who are lying to you to make you afraid.

You can't make friends with people who aren't exactly like you. You're stuck in a a constant negative reinforcement of every single bad habit you've developed. You've alienated everyone in your life who isn't as bitter and scared as you are.

You refuse to improve your life because if you get better or more healthy the broken people you surround yourself with will turn on you and cast you out.

And it's so ad, because it's actually so easy and satisfying to take control of your life and stop acting like a toddler who got his sucker taken away. Imagine if you didn't have to be scared in a room full of strangers because you knew you had the skills to make polite small talk. Imagine if you didn't have to get mad at every little thing because you have perspective and can realize when things are important and when they're not worth getting upset over. Imagine knowing you could survive unexpected hardships that might come your way because you've done it before. That's what growing up is. And that's what you lose when you insist on being perpetual adolescents. And then, suddenly, when the politicians come around and tell you you need to give up your rights so they can solve all your problems for you, you can say, "Why should I give up anything to you when I can just solve my problems on my own?"

You can take the power back from the people you say you hate, but still rely on to be a surrogate parent. You can live a happy life even if you have to work and struggle and face adversity. Hardship builds character, but only if you have any character to work with. Don't spend your whole life relying on people who don't give a fuck about you as a person to keep you safe and provide for you. Because I promise you, they have zero interest in doing either.

[nightshadow2518]

Okay okay I been gone for a bit not touching on the episodes but as someone who usually has controversial taste according to others and beung a huge critic, I wanna say if you hate Bridge, Yuga amd Yuamu then go ahead. It's weird people are fighting so hard on it when this fandom hates all antagonist. Yuna, Tremolo, Swirly, etc so why is it different now? Yes don't ruin the show but yeah hate it.

However...this fandom has an UNUSUAL fucking level of characters. We say we want complex characters but we can't even understand Yuga or Yuamu right now? Honestly if you asked me although there is a lot of faults within Go Rush and I started not to like it for other reasons, the situation right here is honestly one of the more interesting ones because it's a conflict that both sides are right and both sides are wrong and their own order. Yuga/Yuamu are fighting for the future and are saying that everyone else sacrificing their life is going to pass eventually and we know in sevens there's not many aliens, in fact we forget that when they hear about aliens everyone was shocked except for one person. Yuga. However they will be a lot of blood on their hands given that putting an Extinction to a big race or a dying race

Yuhi/Yudias are fighting for the survival of people that have passed away people that they have known and now found out that someone close to them is causing all of this and even is willingly okay with it. However they would also be preventing somebody from getting back home to their timeline no we have devastating it is for him, even being there (Yuhi) when he talks about how the person that came back is probably not even him.

This is honestly one of the more compelling and very deep storylines that we have gotten and maybe Yu-Gi-Oh history and this fandom is treating it like it has to be this big debate on who's right when both of them are in a gray area. This is a complex and compelling story and I feel like it's not getting treated right because we're so busy trying to see who's right who's wrong instead of treating it like a show. In the end there could be a possibility that everyone could be saved and Yuga could get back home or there's a possibility that it was all of waste and Otes/Monster Reborn will happen regardless. I don't know if anyone has said that both of these situations are great areas or even that this is one of the best stories ever SEEN.

I'm usually the big negative person of this community and not many people like my opinions but for this I'm trying to play Both sides because even though go Rush has kind of disappointed me, this story line is very very good and it kind of shows a new view on time travel and how you can't just fix it with one little thing and how once you even travel through it it's going to change constantly and no matter what you do you could mess something up. Most of us are adults in this fandom, some of us are teens. This is a show aimed at 10 year olds but with the complexity of it it's really really mature for its rating and we should treat it as it's maturity. Maybe it's just me but I surprisingly don't hate anyone in the situation, if anything I have a new respect for all four of them. Hate Yuga but my hot take is that he is the most well-written protagonist with a complex story and eye grabbing details. Bridge is not perfect but it just started! Go Rush is the second series and nothing is perfect even after the second time. For all we know by the time this gets to the same amount of legacy that Gallup went through we won't even consider that this was a big thing.

#yugioh go rush #go rush #go rush spoilers #yugioh #ygo go rush #Sorry for it being long #I probably didn't make sense but that's because it's 6:00 a.m. #If some of y'all don't read it it's okay #yuga ohdo #yuamu ohdo #yuhi ohdo #yudias velgear

[wttcsms]

all i need is a character to write this for. you know how the usual trope goes poor, down on her luck reader x super rich ceo and they ride off into the sunset at the end of the fic and they're just so happy and so in love, and sometimes, there's a little antagonist, either in the form of his business rival ORRRRR it's his fiance who he doesn't really care for but their engagement is more like a business deal & the only reason he hasn't broke things off with her is because of his obligation to his business.

well, in this fic, you are not the broke, lovable girl who gets the ceo. you're the other woman — the one who the ceo is SUPPOSED to marry but he doesn't because he doesn't like you.

and i think this fic is fun because we get to explore the aftermath of happily ever after and how someone's greatest moment of their life can also subsequently be YOUR worst day ever. so the fic starts off where theirs end, if that makes sense. you're in the process of inheriting your father's business — the company that could have merged and been the other ceo's if he had only committed himself to you — and it's all about you navigating between what you're expected to be versus what you are... if that makes sense. everyone thinks you're a shark or a vulture; that you just walk around, being a complete bitch and the only thing you have on your brain is business-related. no one is shocked that you're not married; after all, they don't really see you as the marriageable type. and you act like you don't care, that it doesn't affect you whatsoever, and sometimes it really doesn't, but sometimes you think it would be nice to not always constantly have to maintain the heartless reputation everyone keeps forcing down your throat.

i think something else worth mentioning is that while you didn't necessarily LOVE the ceo... you liked him. you knew him since the two of you were kids; you thought that a future partnership with him wouldn't be so bad, and you did try to make this engagement work and it was really HIM that was creating the distance between you two. and you're hurt. because he chose HER over you, and it means that all the times he was cold and indifferent to you wasn't because he was incapable of love... it just means he didn't want to love YOU. so, you're kind of grappling with that fact and thinking that maybe you are the problem. you have no friends, you have to constantly fight and claw your way to a seat at the table even though you're more competent and intelligent than every man in that boardroom, and sickeningly enough, whenever you're really going through it and just want to be alone, there's always the same person witnessing your breakdown: character.

if you're a shark, everyone sees character as a snake — someone sneaky and not to be trusted. he's not from inherited wealth; he comes from a lower middle class family and no matter how much higher he sits than the rest of the people mocking him, no one in the business world can seem to let him forget it. he's also the same person who nearly bought over your father's company, and to this day, no one knows why he didn't go through with it; just that your father damn near had a heart attack over the idea of character taking over. so, needless to say, you don't like him. you're certain that he doesn't like you. he seems all too gleeful to ask about your engagement, playing coy, as if he's been living under a rock and didn't hear the news.

while navigating the rough business world on your own, you find out that character is, surprisingly enough, a decent ally. he values your ideas and opinions, and the fic is kind of just the two of you one upping every person that has insulted either of you.

anyway, it's called 'the worst of me' because you think you're an awful person and you always lean in towards the negative traits people use to describe you & it's just character loving u regardless, bye

[riordanness]

hey dear! Can I have ‘When Emma falls in love?’ For Pjo

Hello! Hello! 

Here is my information!

Name: Anna Lee

Pronouns: She/her

Preference: Male

Age range: Any

Personality: I am an INTJ Slytherclaw, Aquarius and a Type 6 when it comes to anagrams. Lawfully Neutral. I am a huge overthinker and stress a lot with anxiety. People tell me that I can be blunt which results in people thinking that I can be cold but in reality I try to be a kind person when it is needed. I am a realist and many consider me to be intelligent, often asking me to help with their work. I’m incredibly passionate about things I like to do and have a thirst to know everyone’s opinions as I feel that if someone is left out. I’m a creative person but sometimes my brain just goes blank, I hate when it does. I have a really dry sense of humour that usually is a mix of sarcasm, fandom jokes or self degrading jokes. I'm an extremely stubborn person and have to be right about everything. From a young age, my parents were extremely strict and had expected the best out of me which resulted in me being an overachiever. I have to get things perfect or be the best at what I’m doing. I'm really sensitive, even some small harsh words are enough to make me teary. I’ve been called a crybaby because of that and to be honest, that is true. I give too much to other people since I’m afraid of saying no since what if they hate me? And I'm too scared to ask for help or to have something cause I think they will think I'm selfish and worthless. Not the best self esteem 😔 I love to listen to other people since I think not a lot of people have others that they can tell what they wish to say without getting judged or outcasted. But the problem is that I judge too easily too. As much as I want to show a good image to others and help them, I tend to focus on my own needs and how everything can affect me for the better or worse. I hate repeating things, especially in front of a big crowd. I daydream too much, my head always in the cloud. When I get excited, I speak really quickly and stumble over my words which I get embarrassed by and stop talking. I have a rosy view of how the world works—or more specifically, of the people I love. Like sometimes I point out the negative things in life but when with other people, especially those I love, I always see the goodness and beauty in everything. I am very sensitive, especially when it comes to my appearance and personality. I’m always afraid that people are constantly judging me or hate me, which is why I tend to avoid public spaces or being around people in general. When I get familiar with someone or a crowd, I’m not that afraid to state my opinion. I get jealous and possessive easily, like I mentioned my parents are strict meaning I got very few things of my own and those things only came to me because I tried so hard to get it. So when I see someone else with it, it just irks me off. I always make plans but I know I’m not going to complete them, I just like to imagine the future if I actually had motivation and energy to accomplish things. I can never start new things while completing old ones. I am also the oldest child and have 4 younger ones, another reason why I stress too much. I don’t think I mentioned this, but I get angry really easily. The slightest mistakes just pisses me off. I suck at short talks and starting conversations, it’s much easier to have lengthier conversations. I can never do presentations, I always get too nervous. Plus, my friends say my voice is really soft so no one ever hears me much, especially since I’m uncomfortable. When I get angry, my judgement is clouded. I am terrible at holding grudges. I would be upset at someone but the second I see them again, I feel normal and happy in a way. Probably said this before, but I’m a huge day dreamer and stubborn. I can’t concentrate on my work because I always get distracted and daydream about things I will never have. I normally appear composed but have a fiery temper. I really want to be a lawyer. My parents never let me use the internet much as a kid so I pretty much live under a rock but I am incredibly book smart. 

Looks: Half-Korean and Half- White. I’m slightly chubby and curvy with a pear-shaped body (Double D cups). Upon seeing me, many people point out my eyes which are hazel with slight flecks of many colours such as green and amber being the prominent ones. Almond eyes that are doe-like and slightly turn up at the end but barely noticeable. I have a button nose and thin heart shaped lips. My face is round and my eye shape is almond. I am approximately 5’3. Two small moles are fixated on my right cheek and underneath my lip. Long dark brown hair that almost appears black but that solely depends on the lighting. My hair reaches my hips and is kinda wispy at the end. It’s usually on a ponytail with a few strands framing my face. My clothing style tends to be anything comfortable and classy. I prefer to wear black and colours that are darker, you will never find me wearing orange or neon colours. 

Likes: Chocolate, Anime, Music, Food, Being right about something, Reading, Drawing, Strawberries, Smell of Rain, Sleeping, Being the Best, Baking and cooking (even tho I’m not that good at it)  Daydreaming, Murder Mysteries, Romance, Long walks, Making Ocs,  Fiction, Name hunting, Suits, Me, Pinterest, Spicy food, Sweets, Lavender and Indicolite, Aesthetics, and Flower Languages.

Dislike: Loud noises, Jerks, Prejudice People, Slow Walkers, People who chew loudly, Getting look down on, Insects, Studying, Fake People, Self-pity, Getting below 90% in a test, Snow, Overlysweet things, Going outside, and the feeling where your brain is blank and can’t tell what you feel like, Doing nothing all day and Tomatoes

Love Language: Physical Touch and Quality Time

Ideal Type: Pretty Eyes. Will always be there for me and not afraid to speak their mind. Honest and loyal. Someone I can call her best friend, I can be weird around them and they won’t mind at all,Yet they would still help me see the light at the end of the tunnel and tell me it’s okay, that everything is gonna be okay. I wouldn’t like ‘innocent’ people nor ‘kind’ people cause I feel like I won’t be able to connect with them based on my morality level. Will be attentive to my needs. Not necessarily loud but not quite, somewhere in between. I want someone who I can feel okay around, as if everything was fine. Someone who would help carry a burden with me, we are together in everything. A type of person who would wait for me when I’m tying my shoelaces. 

Congratulations on the 400!

hii anna lee! tysm for this,, i instantly got my answer who’s i was reading and it’s clear as day to me that your ship is…

you + jason grace !!

you guys totally understand each other, both of you are a little bit too strict with yourselves and are overachieving, but when you’re together you can both take down those walls and just be yourselves. you both have the same kind of dry humour, but can easily switch between jokes and deep discussions. he’s your best friend, but he’s also your confidante. you just get each other. you both have the same love languages and you’re an a soy sucker for his pretty sky blue eyes.

here’s y’all’s playlist,, hope you like it <3

reading and daydreaming with jason grace

[gkt-tummyaches]

id like to hear some of ur boomer hcs if u don't mind 🤭 or how he acts in relationships w/ others? (either platonic/romantic is good)

boomer's a character that moves to the beat of his own drum. he doesn't like following orders, but he's not exactly a leader-type either. he's a loner by choice.

growing up with brick trying to boss him around throughout childhood was an experience he's surprised he got through without one of them ending up maimed or worse.

despite that, he's very sociable, very likeable. he's witty and sarcastic, funny with a dry sense of humor, etc. a comic relief act. this act tends to be a defense against any kind of negative comments or overly harsh criticism he receives - granted, not much - as well as a way to separate himself from whatever heavier emotions he isn't quite ready to confront.

so, he's well-liked, he's got a lot of acquaintances. he can breeze from one friend group to another without a problem. boomer tends to win people over because of his authenticity; while the light-heartedness is surface-level, it's still genuine, real, which makes a world of difference when it comes to making friends.

it's like this: everybody knows boomer. he's kind of dead on social media and he never stops talking about bugs and he wears t-shirts with weird meme text on them - all of it only really adds to his charm.

the reality goes a little differently. boomer doesn't have many genuine, real friends. it's on purpose that he keeps people at arm's length. not because of any tragic backstory (okay, maybe a little,) or because of feeling like an outcast (okay, maybe that too.)

it's just because he doesn't really want any. boomer's solitary by nature, he likes the freedom that comes with flying solo - nobody to answer to, nobody to accommodate.

he's quite high energy, but there's a part of boomer that just enjoys existing. going out for a walk by himself. having a starbucks on a beach overlooking the seafront, alone. flying at night when everything is quiet. boomer gets called air-headed a lot, because he's constantly daydreaming. his best company is himself.

that's not to say he doesn't have any friends. as aforementioned, he has one or two.

the first is butch. it's kind of a no-brainer. older brothers are supposed to look out for younger brothers, right ? not to mention, during their time with mojo & Him, brick was singled out as the brother with the most potential. it left boomer and butch to their own devices a lot. they've always been very close as a result.

contrary to popular belief, butch knows when to be quiet. he's like an introvert's dream; his company isn't draining, he talks when the quiet needs to be filled but knows when it doesn't. a lot of their time together growing up was just spent together in the same room, while each of them happily did their own activities.

he's probably boomer's most treasured confidante. many nights between them have been shared through 3am philosophical talks, or emotional unravelling. not that boomer tells anybody that part. he guards those secrets with his life.

the other side of it is that boomer actually values butch's opinion a lot. butch is very attuned to people, peacekeeping; when brick lost his head and boomer was at a loss of what to do, butch stood to the plate. it's a leadership quality that boomer really admires, even if neither of them are really into the whole leading thing.

not to mention, butch is a fine ass cook. he always knows just what boomer's in the mood for.

the second is berserk. it's a little unconventional. one of the first people other than bubbles that has really gotten under boomer's skin with how annoying they are - but berserk doesn't do it on purpose, and maybe that's what softened him up to her.

she's just kind of… lonely. she talks even more than he does, invades his personal space, doesn't understand boundaries, mooches off him constantly. they're all things that, if it were anybody else, would piss him off to no end.

the thing is, berserk - embarrassingly - reminds him of his younger self. when he hadn't learned how to appreciate solitude, and so was miserable every second that he wasn't being paid attention to. berserk's definitely kind of fucked up in her own way; his goal isn't to 'fix' her, though, and he'd resent anybody who took that task upon themselves.

there is an urge to look out for her. maybe it's the big brother in him, to give something back rather than to take. he doesn't have a lot to offer, but berserk doesn't seem to mind. it's a little sad.

besides, as they get closer, the more he enjoys spending time with her. boomer's always a little tired by the time they part ways - in a good way, like how muscles ache after a fulfilling workout.

there's not a lot of people boomer finds expending energy on worth doing. berserk might even be the first.

this sentiment does not translate to romance, unfortunately. i have no idea what boomer's deal is, nor do i want to label him, but there is no way you can squeeze him into a relationship with anybody.

the amount of people he's turned down is appalling. every valentines' day (when he still attended school) had all kinds of paper hearts and chocolate crammed into his locker. he had several different promposals he had to awkwardly reject - and not even just because he wasn't attending.

rumors used to go around about who he was dating, the worst being that he was dating bubbles. talk about insulting 😤

ambiguous as to whether he simply isn't looking for romance at this point in his life, or if it's to do with some unannounced sexual orientation. he just likes being alone too much to really commit to anything, i suppose.

it could even be to do with his ingredient. above all, he has a desire to protect himself: it's a little hard to do that if you gain yourself vulnerability after vulnerability in the form of lovers or loved ones.

a lot of his defense mechanisms are evasive rather than offensive: he lets people down gently, he boosts people up with camaraderie, etc. a lot of his playfulness reveals that there's not a lot special about him, nothing worth crushing over or finding attractive (that's the intention, at least.) faux vulnerability to maintain a friendship, but encourage them to move on.

all of it to hide that underneath, he is so angry. there's a lot that's happened for him to feel injusticed and righteous over, a lot that's happened to him that makes him scared of what would happen if he lost his temper.

being constantly at odds with one brother and most of your parental figures growing up makes for a very bitter, resentful boy. it's a part of himself that boomer doesn't like all that much. he'd rather keep it under wraps.

it's easier to do that when you're not in a relationship that requires honesty, communication, and exposing yourself for somebody else to judge. god forbid he ever be somebody that rages at their significant other.

that, and nothing can beat the absolute conversationalists his pet beetles are. what a riot.

some other honorable relationship mentions:

brick, obviously. boomer and brick aren't close at all, but there are a few things they're willing to unite over. they break out into an argument if they're in a room together longer than 10 seconds, but only they're allowed to fight with each other. the kind of 'only i'm allowed to bully my brother' you expect from siblings.

,,, most of the time, brick deserves it. boomer might be prone to letting brick get a tongue-lashing before stepping in.

buttercup ! she's butch's best friend, but she's super active. good, upbeat company to have around. since she's over a lot, it's a given that she and boomer would become friends in that time. they're mostly surface-level; goofing around, play-fighting, friendly challenges.

they're kind of united over their love for butch. buttercup is somebody that boomer admires for her tenacity and her devotion.

princess. you wouldn't think it. or maybe you would. they have an on-going snark war going on, regularly meet up for starbies (mostly for princess to gossip, and boomer to sit there pretending he isn't thoroughly engrossed.) frenemies, but a little friendlier than that.

,,, he kind of has a thing for lonely red-headed girls who act bratty to hide just how badly they need a friend. princess is just a little sharper on the edges than most. it keeps boomer on his toes.

just a few hcs about how he conveys affection too:

boomer is actually pretty direct most of the time. broad questions like "how are you doing?", "how are things?", make it easy for people to dismiss it if they'd like. though if it's really obvious that something is amiss, he will ask about it.

he is terrible at gift-giving, but he sure does it ! feeling sad ? here's a wad of bubble wrap.

sharing food and drink. he's usually pretty food-aggressive and unwilling to share anything, especially because he's hungry 24/7. it's a big deal if he shares even a crumb.

makes playlists for people. they don't have any particular mood or connection, but just songs that remind them of a person or that he'd think they'd like. he'll tell somebody he made a playlist for them if he cares. he'll actually share the playlist if he thinks it'll make them feel better.

"do you wanna see my ant colony?"

and of course, his most-used tactic of displaying affection: bullying people

#rowdyruff boomer #boomer #rowdyruff boys #headcanons #hc #ask #he's such a loser #i love him sm #platonic ship #character intro

[mikuni14]

Ok, but I haven't seen such a primitive and crude person in any series, not only BL, like EunJi for a long time. And I use these words literally. EunJi, under the guise of being “a pretty girl, a student", acts like some juvenile gangster, raised with no education, no manners, no good role models  😁 She's not even evil like YeonJin from The Glory or many other bad characters - she's genuinely primitive. And by the way, I think it’s funny that she’s a girl, becasue she is written like a very creepy dude, I mean look at the things she does: harassing JaeWon all the time, ignoring the word ‘no’, verbally and physically attackicg people just because they had the audacity to defy her... I did this 👀👀👀 when she asked her rival what motel she should go to with JaeWon. Who thinks that THIS argument will win the “love competition”? 😂 It's the same when, despite hearing "no" all the time, she basically keeps stalking JaeWon, she sticks to him, sometimes in a literal way, pretends she has to hold on to him because she's wearing high heels (which she says trying to be seductive, which came out extremely old fashioned and just creepy, but maybe that’s just me 😄), and the icing on the cake is kissing JaeWon without his consent when it’s CLEAR that he’s not feeling well. 

Her primitiveness can also be seen in how she reacts to the problems that come her way. Her only reaction is create a conflict and fight, and here too, I mean that word literally. Because we all saw EunJi establishing her senior dominance on AeRi WITH FORCE. I even took AeRi's crying as a reaction not only to the club's indifferent reaction to JiHyun's accident, but also (maybe even more so) to EunJi's verbal AND PHYSICAL attack on her. It can be seen everywhere, also in how she tried to get JaeWon back during their trip: she did it aggressively, attacking him and blaming him for everything. Her primitiveness can also be seen in how she treats JiHyun: - she has no hesitation in expressing negative opinions about him in public, although she barely knows him - she has no qualms about insulting his friends and boss at his job, which he could lose beacsue of this - notoriously lies to prove how much JaeWon wants to be with her ("he begged me to do a project with him") - her method of "destroying" a rival is to go to his job and bully him as an employee, taking advantage of the fact that he cannot defend himself. this is the lowest behavior imaginable, this is being an absolute dick And when that still doesn't work, she just lies outright that she and JaeWon are together and bluntly starts a conversation about their potential motel sex 😬 In addition, she’s constantly rolling her eyes and visibly showing impatience that oh my god, this boy again, like this is something teenagers do, which only proves how immature she is.

It's just - I haven't seen such an ordinary, banally primitive person in a long time, someone who is not even capable of any sophisticated acts of evil, or plotting - she is just so incredibly simple.

And practically the same can be said about Taehyung. He is equally primitive, strongly attached to the senior/freshman relationship (but only when they are the senior) and to all relationships where social hierarchies are emphasized (but only when they are on top, in any other cases they’re extremelly triggerd and offended, immediatelly taking their frustrations on others). They both treat JaeWon as if he wasn't human, just some walking and talking mix of looks, money, chaebol father and position, they have an unhealthy obsession with JaeWon closely related to their low self-esteem, because honestly, their self-esteem IS dependent on JaeWon. The only difference between them is that for EunJi, JaeWon's condition doesn’t matter as long as he belongs to her as some kind of trophy and a prove of her position, while for TaeHyung, the better JaeWon is, the worse he feels - he just wants him to lose.

I can't imagine how empty JaeWon's life must have been with friends like that. I'm not surprised he's been drinking so much, and I'm not surprised how shocked he was to meet someone as different as JiHyun. And why JaeWon acted like he was starving around him, starving for pure feelings, normal human relationships, starving for a friendly attention and touch and for being treated like a human.

#the eighth sense #korean bl #bl drama

[heliosoll]

how is it that we sometimes manifest things by only thinking of them once? because it feels like it contradicts with what everybody's saying about "persist with your state/thoughts"

I'd love to hear your opinion on this

It could be different for other people, but I feel it has more to do with the lack of doubts/obsession of that thing.

I notice many people have trouble manifesting the things they truly and deeply desire because they obsess over the lack of 3D evidence, doubt whether it'll actually manifest, fear results, etc. And as we all know, the law of assumption states that your assumptions will manifest. If you're constantly thinking things like "it's not manifesting, nothing is happening, i'm so fucking scared right now etcetc", then that's what your 3D will actually reflect. It reflects the lack that people obsess over.

Persisting isn't something that you absolutely need to do to manifest, it's a tool to help people who have those kinds of thoughts. If someone often has those doubts and fears, persisting in thoughts that affirm their desires and power instead can really help.

Meanwhile, if you think of one simple thing you want to manifest, assume it's yours, and then never have any doubts/fears/negative assumptions about it, obviously it's going to manifest without pain. Ideally this is how manifesting should work!

As a side note, it's important to remember that while doubts and fears can be annoying to deal with, they are ultimately your thoughts and they can be dealt with accordingly. You can easily assume that they don't hinder your manifestations! I recommend anyone who deals with doubts to assume that they either don't have doubts or that those doubts have no power. Your assumptions are behind everything, including your own thoughts!

#letters 🎀

[discluded]

Not looking to dump on you about the state of fandoms in your inbox but the MA fandom is the most Kpop adjacent fandom I have ever been a part of that shares some similar characteristics. It has been really eye opening to see the power of trending and just how much the efforts of the fans really do pay off in the promotion of the celebrities and the opportunities they receive but IMO you have to have one fan buy enough tickets to account for half of the presale record the movie set it is genuinely a bit demoralizing. It's amazing that fans are super committed and there was clearly interest in the movie as half the presale tickets did come from genuine fans and the public but I sometimes fear that people are too focused on the numbers games. These actions show the passion that fans have for these celebs but a person's work and the results should speak for themselves. I mean fandoms are changing constantly so maybe this is the new normal but for someone who isn't used to it it's been a bit annoying trying to find out what the actual reception of the movie is amongst the general audiences and how well the movie is actually performing in the box office.

https://twitter.com/Pandababygirl2/status/1709397703736824259?t=_yF0NTDyS3VL7wK3Jj19vw&s=19

you're not wrong with that and you're not the first to have noticed this rapid shift and interest in Thai stars recently.

for example this article was published on HBSg (which has a very friendly relationship with mileapo thanks to Kenneth Goh) and resyndicated in other Sg media outlets in the last couple of months.

As for whether that's good or bad, I think you've hit the nail on the head that business as usual changes, and this appears to be a new business as usual.

I mean, western celebs are also taking advantage of this as well. Some more egregious than not. TSwift recently got called out by her own fans for one of these common kpop practices of releasing multiple album versions specifically to drive up sales (cough line her own pockets with fans' money).

(op has already deleted her account now as she said she would but I have it cached from earlier)

as far as I'm aware, this was also a ticket donation project so not just a single person buying tickets and leaving the seats empty, or the equiv of a single fan buying dozens of albums which they can't listen to.

I actually think this is a much better use of fan funds than some of the projects like the Time Square ad placement for Man Suang... which of course was useless because there was no international release date announced 🥲 you want your advertising dollars to go somewhere effective and this was pretty much an equivalent of throwing money into a river. (sorry to the FCs who ran this.. I understand how hard it was to organize things like this so I tried to avoid criticizing but the effort could've gone somewhere else...)

as for the "actual reception", it's actually a relatively new phenomenon that we're able to hear first hand the thoughts of common viewers on the film à la Rotten Tomatoes. historically, films relied on good critic reviews to drive foot traffic. I actually have so many negative opinions about forums like RT (which suffer from the same problems as film critics... ie who is frequenting the site) but that's for another time.

ultimately the one who controls your fandom experience is you, so if you don't want to engage at this level or see this kind of behavior, just remove these kinds of more extreme (passionate?) fans from your line of sight. As long as they're not hurting anyone, including themselves in a financial sense, I don't feel like it's appropriate to moralise on the best way to be a fan. these fandom spaces are predominantly female-occupied when male dominated fan spaces (see, sports and video games) are not subject to the same amount of scrutiny over the level of zeal.

#fandom #fan culture #man suang

[aspenaspenaspenaspenaspen]

I kinda have something important(and controversial) I want to say.

I think a boy calling a girl annoying in like, a genuine way, is sexist.

Let me explain. Sexism has always been, at its core, about treating women differently than men, in negative or harmful ways. And you can see that when a girl is called annoying. This isn’t about how a girl might feel after being called annoying, it’s an insult sure, but this isn’t specifically about that. Because, when a girl is called annoying, she is TREATED as annoying. It becomes her first and foremost trait in the eyes of the person who pointed out she’s annoying. AND BOYS ARE NOT TREATED IN THIS SAME WAY. When a boy is “annoying” it’s either just in that moment, or a trait AFTER all these other traits. For example, a boy might be annoying when he’s constantly raising his hand in class, but he’s intelligent first, and clever in the eyes of his friends, and hard working in the eyes of his teacher, and ALL of these other traits. It’s not the same for girls!

This comes from the expectation that girls are supposed to be “desirable”, in the eyes of society as well as people. And being annoying takes away from the “desirability”.

And I won’t act like boys don’t get affected by society’s standards, but there’s no arguing that being considered “desirable” “lady like” and “without flaws” have a lot more connection with the expectations girls face.

This isn’t just in everyday life. This happens in politics as well. I’m not the biggest fan of politicians, or Hillary Clinton, but she’s a GREAT example of this. Clinton faced tons of backlash as a politician, simply she was a woman who voiced her opinions, debated people, and was ambitious. She was constantly berated by the media for not being “womanly enough”, her position as an opinionated politician made her seem “manly” or “un-lady like”. Now think of girls in your life who you’ve heard been called annoying. Had they simply been voicing their opinions, having a debate or even an argument? WHY ARE ALL THESE THINGS EXCUSABLE IF YOU’RE A BOY, BUT CHARACTER RUINING IF YOU’RE A GIRL??

This IS an example of sexism, so of course when I hear a boy call a girl “annoying” I consider it sexist. Girls can’t be strong, or loud, or angry or passionate or opinionated or advocates or ANYTHING, without being called annoying.