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rafeandonlyrafe · 15 days

Text

the same tv

words: 1.8k

warnings: 18+ only, smut, unprotected sex, p in v sex, parent death, funerals, robbery, redemption/forgiveness, addiction, drinking (wine, not like hard drinking), tickling, cockwarming, they call themselves kids at one point but at no point are reader or rafe under 18, like itll make sense once you read it in context

the first thing you do when you enter your house is kick off your shoes. the next is to stop holding back your tears as they stream down your face. you can't even sob anymore, just silent, steady tears.

you sigh as you look around the entryway. there's been some changes since you moved away, despite only being out of your parents house for a little over a year. they replaced the grand portrait that was of your mom's parents with one of you, now taking the place of honor.

you look away before you get to the rest of the family photos. you've seen enough at the funeral. you walk further in to the house, bare feet against the shiny wood floor.

you pause when you hear something further in. you haven't forgotten how the old house seemed to speak, groaning and settling during strong winds or when too many people were crammed between it's walls.

this sound seems different, but you're also occasionally sniffling, your ears are shot from blasting music in an attempt to distract yourself, so you shrug it off and walk further into the living room.

the sound suddenly makes sense as you see someone stood in your living room, arms holding up your parents flat screen television, awkwardly trying to carry it.

you aren't even mad. you honestly don't care about the tv. or the fact that someone is trying to rob you.

you let out a bitter laugh before you sink to the floor. “of fucking course this happens.” you are glad you still have your purse slung from your shoulder as you pull your wallet out, quite aggressively throwing it at the robber who has now frozen.

“what?” he questions, lowering the tv to the ground and pushing his hood of his head, a dumb move for someone currently committing a crime.

“this has been the worst week of my life and now you're robbing me. just my fucking luck…” you let out a broken sob. “just take whatever you want and leave.”

the only things that matter to you still in the house aren't actually worth anything anyways. the photos of your parents, your dad's cologne that's half empty, the oak tree that your childhood dog is buried next to.

“i thought the people who lived here died.”

you pick your head up, a look of fury overtaking your face.

“they did. they're my fucking parents! and now they're gone and you're fucking robbing me! get the fuck out!” you stand up, pushing at the robbers chest.

he looks familiar, like you should know who he is but can't place him.

“im-shit. im sorry.” he says, allowing you to shove him away and out the door.

“im really fucking sorry!” he yells again before you slam the door shut.

-- years later --

you park your car in the driveway instead of pulling it all the way into the garage like you know you should, but you need to know if you're correct about the man sitting on your front step.

“you're the kid that tried to rob me.” you say as you walk the sidewalk to the porch.

“yes.” he says, looking ashamed and a whole lot more grown up. “i was an addict and i owed a debt. my dad had just kicked me out of the house and i was on my own for the first time. it was stupid of me, but when i heard the people living here died, i thought it'd be a victimless crime.”

he sighs deeply, like even just thinking back to that time physically hurts. “i didn't even think that someone could have inherited the house. im so, so sorry.”

he swallows thickly. “my mom died when i was young. my dad- my dad just died recently. he faked his death and i got him back, but he's actually gone this time. you know what you said about the worst week in your life?”

you think back those years. it's mostly a blur, especially the days surrounding your parents car crash and funeral, but you do remember breaking down in front of the robber. you nod gently, waiting to hear the end of his speal.

“i know what you mean now. and im sorry i hurt you. im sorry about your parents dying.” he pulls something out of his pocket, extending his hand.

you look into his open palm, realizing it's a ornate gold necklace.

“no.” you shake your head. “you keep it. you don't need to bribe me to forgive you.”

“i want you to have it.” he says. “it's… it's not a lot, but it's something. something to help make up for what ive done.”

you reach forward, carefully taking the necklace out of his outstretched hand, carefully not to accidentally bump his skin.

“thank you.” you say, admiring the way the sun gleams off the metal.

“im rafe, by the way. rafe cameron.”

“y/n.” you respond, undoing the clasp of the necklace.

“here, let me.” he takes it out of your hands, moving quicker than you can think as he steps around you. your hair is already up in a bun, so rafe is able to reach around and easily place the chain around your neck.

“thank you.” the weight of the necklace feels comfortable against your skin, like it's the last finishing touch you need. you are wearing your mother's earrings, your father's bracelet, and now you have the other piece of what made that time in your life so miserable, your robbers necklace.

“i… i guess ill be going now.” rafe says.

you turn and watch him walk away. you recognize so much of your former self in him, the clear grieving he's going through.

“are you sober now?” you call out before he reaches the end of your driveway.

“sober enough.” he shouts back. rafe doubts he'll ever truly be clean, but he can at least manage now, doesn't need the drugs like he used to.

“then come back for dinner tomorrow. we can talk.”

you can see the smile stretch over his features. “ill be there.”

-- three months later --

“shit.” rafe says, head snapping over to you. “this is the same tv.”

you giggle and nod, surprised it took him so long to realize. “i never really watch tv on the actual tv, so no need to replace it.” you shrug, the gold necklace still draped over your neck. you haven't taken it off except to shower and sleep.

“god, thats crazy.” rafe looks over to you. “imagine if we just talked back then.”

you shake your head. “you just think you want that because we get along now. we were both in bad places.”

“you don't think we would have been hooking up back then?” rafe asks, raising an eyebrow at you, watching the way your thighs press together at the mere mention of hooking up, already feeling the urge to sleep with rafe even after having sex only a couple of hours ago.

“we were two scared kids. if we were hooking up we definitely shouldn't have been.” you giggle, reaching your wine glass out for rafe to refill, which he is glad to pour a more than healthy amount in.

“and now?” rafe looks down at his lap.

“and now we are two slighty less scared slightly older kids.” you giggle again, taking a deep sip before leaning across the couch cushion to press a kiss to rafes cheek, the movie you had put on long forgotten.

“rafe.” you wait until he looks you in the eye. “im here for you.”

“god, what have i done to deserve you?” rafe wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you on top of him as he flops back onto the couch.

you let out a laugh before it's cut off with his lips. he kisses you heavily, hand against the back of your head, not allowing you to pull away, not that you want to.

you let himself get lost in your kiss. you wish you had someone to support you in the time you needed most, and you're determined to be that person for rafe now.

rafe easily dominates your mouth even though he's underneath you as you quickly work your shorts off, wiggling against him until your bottom half is nude.

you press against rafes crotch, still covered by his sweatpants. you feel his cock straining against the fabric as you rub your pussy against it, wetting the gray material.

“baby, please.” rafe groans. he would pull his cock out himself, but his hands are preoccupied holding you close to him as if his life depends on it.

“oh, now you don't like teasing?” you smile.

“alright, i deserve this.” rafe also manages a chuckle despite his straining erection. “but please. need to feel your pussy ‘round me.”

“alright.” you roll your eyes dramatically. you'll have to get revenge on rafe at a different time for edging you the other night.

you push his pants down his thighs until you're able to reach into his underwear and pull out his cock. you give him a few quick strokes before lining up your entrance and sinking down.

rafe let's out a moan, barely pulling his face away from yours. “you're so wet.”

“it's almost like i like you or something.” you roll your eyes.

rafe laughs before kissing you again, hand moving up to your hair, tangling his fingers between the strands.

you sit on his cock for a moment, adjusting, before beginning to move, up then down, up then down, subtle movements of your hips, not needing anything fast, wanting drawn out, wanting it to last.

the movie is long over by the time rafe finally cums, a hand finally moving down to rub your clit to make sure you get off at the same time as his.

by the time you're both satisfied, you're sweaty and exhausted. you don't even bother to pull off his cock as you rest your head against his chest.

“thank you.” rafe says softly, rubbing his hand over your back. you don't need to ask what for. you know. for being there. you'll always be there.

you look up at him, a small smile on your face. “how are we gonna tell people we met?”

things are quickly getting serious, and while he hasn't breached the subject with you yet, neither of you have been hiding how quickly you're falling.

“what, you think it's a problem that we met when i was robbing you?” rafe says, making you giggle, only intensified by his hand pressing into your side, fingers tickling you as you howl with laughter.

rafe flips you over onto your back so you're underneath him, keeping his cock pushed inside of you.

“maybe we should just tell people we met on tinder.” rafe shrugs.

you roll your eyes. “somehow that's more embarrassing.”

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charmedreincarnation · 10 months

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hii maya!!! i have a success story and im so excited bc this is my first manifestation success story.

for context for everyone else, i was getting bullied at my workplace. my boss hated me and would mock me in front of people and my coworkers disliked me and disincluded me from things and talked behind my back. It was so bad and i was searching for another job instead even though this was so close to my house, the pay was good, the actual work was easy. etc. I told maya abt this and she was such an angel and would let me vent to her and gave me a lot of advice about manifesting.

I wish I could say that I took her advice and changed my life but I honestly struggled a lot. I rmbr crying every single night before going to work and constantly just dreading being there or the thought of having to be there.

But everytime I vented, maya would always tell me to just affirm while listening to theta waves as I was going to sleep so I tried to atleast do that. In hindsight this was a really big thing. I was recently looking into SATS and reading posts about how important what you do before sleeping is because you are super suggestible. I think crying every night made me keep manifesting that my job sucked and stuff whereas affirming that it was great helped to start changing that.

I also tried to ignore the bullying and just act like I was being treated correctly. Like one time my boss said that she wished she had hired someone else and before I would have said nothing and just gone home and cried but instead I just laughed, taking it as a joke, and said that I'll make sure to work hard so that she can be proud of hiring me.

Slowly over the course of 2 weeks things started to change. We got 2 new people added into the team and one of them sits next to me and is my friend and I talk to him a lot. My boss and coworkers are okay with me now, like we have nice small talks and I haven't been undermined in a while. I made an error and before it would have become a big issue and while I did get scolded slightly, it was more of a "be more careful when doing this" versus what I usually got which was "you are so stupid, why are you like this." I also made a lot of other friends at work and work is pretty fun! I look forward to going to work sometimes (not all the time bc I'd rather just be at home in bed) but yeah it has changed so much and I'm much happier.

i just want to thank you so much maya. you are such an angel and i genuinely appreciate you so much. i can't wait to come back to you with a void success story!!

I am beyond proud of you! Your Success is proof that you overcame everything and persevered. But I actually want to point out your reaction to your boss, and encourage everyone to follow suit. You quite literally laughed at the 3D which is what I would do metaphorically but I mean physically probably works better lol.

Regardless I’m happy for everything you’ve accepted as yours. I’m also glad this is only encouraging you to want to go farther and achieve your entire dream life, not just a good one you can tolerate. When I reached this stage I remember I had a thought like “well maybe I should just accept this” “or it’s not that bad now I guess so do I really need to continue or can I chill” and if you have to ask yourself that the answer is no and you know you deserve it all at the highest degree.

#law of assumption #manifesation #manifesting #my asks #sucess

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highoncatfood · 25 days

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im going to dump my thoughts on u here cuz i can anyway have u heard of the song Bed of Roses by Mindless Self Indulgence ive been listening to it on loop and i am going to share with u my interpretation of the lyrics cuz it seems im an outlier amongst what people (or atleast whats on the genius page) think it means but my take is so real and true to me

basically Bed of Roses is thought to be a song about being passive in life and letting things pass you by and happen as they do, not caring about making the perfect life, but for me personally it always came off as being about suicidal thoughts and that interpretation not only makes more sense to me but also is far more interesting

'hey its alright my life has never been a bed of roses' is the singer talking about their life, saying how its unlike a bed of roses which are seen as beautiful and also a symbol of love (also searching it up it seems bed of roses is an expression for a carefree easy life) in short theyre saying their life sucks, but thinking of it in the context of it being suicidal its interesting because the 'hey its alright' then sounds like a rationalization, the following line 'this ways better for me' only helps with painting this image. its a person rationalizing their thoughts by going 'hey my life has always sucked, death would just be better for me'

and the line 'i dont care to live the life ive chosen' further adds to this, its explicitly saying they dont care to live their life

then theres the next part, which is pretty similiar to the last but then there is the line 'dont feel sorry for me', they're asking an outside party to not feel bad for their planned demise, and its repetition makes it seem like begging almost. tying this into the earlier verses which can be read as rationalization makes it seem like the singer is a person trying to comfort and placate a close one, by rationalizing that their suicide will be better for them and begging them to not feel sorry

also 'feeling sorrys been my lifes devotion' is a banger line . i have thoughts on what it could be interpreted as but i feel like the connections arent strong enough and the line like speaks for itself i think

i think this part could be about being resistance to change or healing, it could be a negative reaction to this outside party trying to talk them out of it or reason with them, but in the end they still say 'my friend' showing they care and love them. the 'screw you' could perhaps also be read as someone trying to distance themselves from their loved ones in hopes that their death wont be as painful then

i think its interesting how after that the song ends with just a reptition of 'my lifes never been a bed of roses', perhaps im looking too far into it but it could be seen as the 'last stage', of fixating on the worst parts of life as you spiral annnd .

anyway i like this song and i kinda associate this song with seth but 4 different reasons (flower imagery, lifes sucked, not wanting pity, 'feeling sorrys been my life devotion' -> religion with its emphasis on remorse for sins and devotion. etc.)

was not expecting this at all and i dont know this song but! i like this interpretation thank u for sharing honestly i always love to read too much into lyrics and i tend to come up with diff interpretations than wht was most likely the artists intention

for example recently ive been thinking of reuse the cels by car seat headrest as a song abt gender dysphoria and the transition process (when in.reality its abt like. getting back into a relationship with someone which havent worked out in the past or whetevr)

i like to think the narrator is actually talking abt themself 'i should be glad to have you back' the 'you' being their own sense of identity

'i know every frame so many times that ive seen' refering to their own body, reminiscent of how a lot of trans folks experiencing dysphoria who tend to worry abt their self image and the ways their body looks, r constantly thinking abt it and spotting every detail, being forced to look at it everyday, wishing it was something esle/wanting to change it

this chorus and lines to me r abt hrt and like. thinking of times before realizing they were trans, times when maybe they were oblivious and not yet so worried abt their body and/or identity and wanting to not have to worry again and be happy with themself, hoping tht hrt will help with that. but at the same time the fear and anxiety that comes with not knowing if medically transitioning will guarantee being freed from all the insecurity and pain caused by the dysphoric feelings. asking urself what if it doesnt satisfy. wht if going through all that trouble, all those changes, spending all that time and money doesnt even bring the result ur hoping for. is it worth it? u dont have to do all of that. wht if all it does is drain u of energy and hope and actually make u into something further from wht ur goal was (symbolized by fading colors on reused animation cels [idk much abt that but also u could interpret it as like real body cells i guess] like.... the repeating process of replacing hormones, going through constant physical changes and stuff) so generally like. indecision and thinking too far ahead/overthinking i guess. does any of that make sense im jst saying whtever comes to mind at this point i gave up on trying to keep this cohesive

'doesnt it seem an awful waste' and 'will i lose you again' can be the narrator again referring to themself, thinking that the person they were pre-transition will fade away. that they couldve lived a completely different life, that all they do is bring 'that girl or boy they couldve been' to an end. replacing them with the desired version of themself, but not sure if thats still even the same person they used to be

and. i think it should be obvious but this is all based on how i myself deal with and think of my identity as a trans person. i feel like i should clarify that this isnt me saying that this is the experience of every trans person, each of us is different etc etc

um anyway yeah thanks for the ask wiki i might listen to the song u talked abt at some point <3

#asks #car seat headrest #living while starving #lyric analysis #trans #csh #gadanie

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wolvesandvisions · 6 months

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resharing my thoughts from twitter but i just watched the two parter lemonhope episodes again after a few years since seeing it and i actually think ppl who say its their least favorite episodes should probably rewatch it again as an adult if they haven’t already

i never personally hated it as a kid because i knew it was saying smth but i didnt get what. but now i know its clearly about what its like being an abused kid who leaves their home and doesnt know what to do with themselves

like when i was like 13-14 it seemed weirdly abrupt that after he saved his people he just left. i thought a lesson wasn’t learned. but i think its cool now. bcs after he finally repaid the debt that was haunting him he still wanted to move on, and its actually really interesting. some of these AT episodes just came out at a weird time

just for fandom related context and what I remember, Steven Universe was airing, Finn is literally at his worse, at this point we’re all teenagers so everyone not only understands theres a plot but expects one now and gets irritated when the story doesnt directly tie back to whats going on, a lot of lack of patience n trust in the story

and i get it i dont think i blame kids n teens at the time for being really frustrated, disappointed and confused with abstract storytelling and really intense plot lines with no clear resolution right away. i think it just makes me more grateful we got more seasons and these stories got told anyways

in my rewatch im getting closer and closer to Breezy which was the episode that made me drop the series as a kid - and I regret it a lot in hindsight. like at least for me i know very soon a looott episodes are about to got into even more painful subject matter and i do remember talking to my sibling who said they felt seen by some of the episodes in this time period but ln a way they literally Could not Process at the time and thats. still important i think

all in all im glad lemonhope as a set of episodes exists at all, and the fact people struggle to empathize with it even now is due to a lot of factors about the lemon characters that cant really be changed and actually make everything all the more interesting

#adventure time #lemonhope #lemongrab #at spoilers #wolf txt.#adventure time musings

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woomycritiques543 · 7 months

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My current thoughts on the Sallie Mae situation.

As someone who used to be mentally unwell for the past few years, I find that my past posts were written in a rush. I find that my past self wasn’t actually upset about the Sallie Mae situation, but rather how Erin Frost was being treated, the people that wronged her, and the fandom’s behavior towards the character and Ignis to be nothing short of disrespectful of the trans identity and not at all being done out of respect, but rather to have Sallie’s _____ define how they see her. Which is what concerned me and why I put that into the video in the first place. So to address the situation, I believe that it should be addresses according to the participants and what each of us should have done. So with that said:

Ignis.

1. Now that I am diagnosed, I believe that Ignis was actually someone both of good and bad faith, that she actually loved Sallie Mae and wanted to have good representation. But that after she said that “I did this for what the fans want.” I researched what those fans “wanted” and found nothing more than disrespectful presentations of the character that I ended up putting into my now deleted “Vivziepop Archive Extravaganza.” video. But that in itself just shows that the fandom was the one who wanted to be bad faith with Sallie Mae.

2. The reason why Ignis emphasized _____ now that I look back on it was because she wanted to make a point about transgender representation. Which now that I have space in my brain to better think things through, I think that this in itself is fine, it was just executed poorly due to the way that the other characters were drawn causing this to be emphasized in a way that was drawn differently from the other characters in a way that caused this to he executed as ___tishization. Even if the good intentions were there. So with Sallie Mae and both her and Sallie’s representation, Ignis was in good faith. I just wish that she was honest about Erin Frost’s posts, the merch that she was proud of instead of hiding behind non-__xual merchandising, and addressed the sitiation with Finn, Sallie’s brother, instead of ignoring the transgender community’s concerns and using the fact that she was a voice actress to avoid accountability for supporting Vivziepop despite what happened with Finn.

Erin Frost.

1. What I believe that Erin should have done differently is that she shouldn’t have just left her statement about Sallie Mae vague but instead should have made an explanation as to why she felt that what Vivziepop was doing with Sallie was _____tization. The issue being the difference between how Sallie was drawn compared to the other characters within the merchandising, and how that ended up causing the execution of a otherwise good faith decision to be done poorly.

Jayman.

1. Oh boy…. Jayman. What could I say about Jayman except that they purposely took Erin’s post out of context to make outlandish claims that used Erin’s vague wording to make her look “bad”, the dishonesty in how he presented his views on pretty much everything, what he ended up doing to other fans, how he treated me. Jayman was just an awful person overall, and im glad that he left the internet before he could have done what he had done to me to anyone else.

Myself.

1. For me, I feel like I should have further looked into the situation and explained myself better. But couldn’t have at the time due to my brain feeling cluttered because I didn’t have proper medical treatment. I should have kept the accountability for the fandom’s actions and Spindlehorse’s actions separate instead of grouping them together the way that I did.

I was too accusatory, I should’ve said that “Though Sallie’s brother situation isn’t your fault, that doesn’t mean that you should keep supporting someone you know wants to erase much needed representation of gnc.” but couldn’t say this at the time due to my past mental state being much less coherent.

2. I’ve realized why the past when it comes to this situation caused me so much pa^n. It was the fact that people kept taking Erin Frost’s word at face value instead of trying to dig into why she said what she said and trying to analyze the screenshots more than just face value. I was actually up^et about Erin Frost, not Sallie Mae. -and because of how I was at the time my thoughts were jumbled together so I took out my emotions about Erin out on Ignis, when I should have again, kept my thoughts about Sallie’s brother, Ignis, and Erin Frost separate.

The problem?

I couldn’t do it at the time. My brain functioned in a way that grouped things together into disorganized mush.

-and now that I know that I am mentally ill, it effects me even more that Jayman was such an able^st person and that Ignis let him get away with treating me the way that he did and let Vivziepop get away with everything else.

In all, I wish that I could do more.

I wish that I could make a proper video on Vivziepop like I had planned to, it’s just that due to personal and technical reasons such a video would be physically impossible to do.

So take this as a “My current thoughts” sort of thing since a proper video on either subject matter, or any more videos for that matter, wouldn’t be possible to do in my current state.

-and with that said, I wish you all a goodnight.

Take care. -RaySquid.

#helluva boss #helluva boss criticism #helluva boss critical #transgender representation

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ethanhuntfemmefatale · 9 months

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I feel like you’re the only other person in the world who is as intrigued by the ethan/claire/jim dynamic as I am. It drives me crazy! I love that ethan, who is portrayed as a pretty flawless guy (he just cares TOO much) in the later movies gets this like crazy quirk of being in love with his father figure/boss’s wife and I love that you’re not always sure how much is manipulation and how much is genuine every time they interact. Severely underrated. Anyway loved the fic!

anon i am so so glad that you loved the fic and i am so glad to hear from another person fascinated by the ethan/claire/jim fuckery. (incidentally being a fellow ethan/claire/jim interested individual entitles you automatically to friend status should you so desire)

your ask touches on some things and it's giving me the urge to rant so please forgive me cause im probably about to get very off topic. I just love your point about the way that ethan (who is so steadfastly heroic in later movies!) starts out with this massive, like, to lean into the MI1 religious imagery, sin. And that sin isn't resolved in any satisfactory way--both of the people involved die, and no one is left alive who even knows what really happened, and this makes me feel rabid to think about. (Luther saw the cheek kiss, but has no context for it, and I feel strongly that Ethan has never told him anything else about that. I really think Ethan never breathes a word to anyone about Jim, Claire or Max. Kittridge is probably the closest to being able to infer some of the details, he knows Ethan loved Jim, he knows about Max's "entrapment," but he's too much of a self-absorbed bureaucrat to give a shit.)

But back to the point about the sin. For my money, Ethan's sin is the heart of MI1. The movie tells us that Ethan's sin is being in love with Claire--but in a queer reading of the movie, it's easy to read into Ethan's interactions with Claire and Jim and infer that his real sin is being in love with both of them, a sin that Jim will never openly acknowledge, but that all three of them are aware of to some degree. Ethan's sin is also portrayed as being...not actually his fault. He doesn't participate in any of Claire's "seduction moments," although from his expression after the cheek kiss IMO you can see that he has strong feelings about them. Ethan's sin is something that is done to him, and regardless of whether or not he wants it, regardless of whether initiates or even participates, he is corrupted by the experience. He's only (to some degree) cleansed by the death of claire, jim and krieger, the only people who knew about what happened.

(one of the reasons I drew from gawain and the green knight in the end of the fic is because--beyond the parallels of jim as the lord going hunting in the woods, claire as the lady going hunting for gawain, ethan as the knight just trying to make it out alive--that's a story that deals heavily in impossible moral tests and loss of agency. And Gawain emerges from it 'fey-touched', fundamentally changed despite the fact that most of what happened to him was unwanted and unavoidable. That's how i feel about ethan at the end of MI1)

It's important to note briefly that I actually don't think of the Claire/Jim/Ethan thing as his only sin in the movie. It's the only one that's remarked on directly, but the whole thing with Max feels like it's presented too similarly to ignore. It's another situation of power differences and emotional and sexual manipulation where Ethan is put in an impossible position and emerges morally corrupted (by the rules of the movie), but victorious.

In a lot of ways, I feel like the sin itself almost serves less as an indictment of Ethan and more as a worldbuilding device. MI1 establishes the world of the IMF really vividly without showing us hardly anything about it! we don't even know what the IMF is really, it doesn't have a headquarters, we don't get to know any other teams outside of the one that dies in the beginning, but the movie renders the world of the IMF through Ethan's relationship with Claire and Jim. I've talked before about the "sea of lies." The thing that made me love MI1 so much in the first place was the specific feeling that is so beautifully evoked, of gradually realizing that everyone you have ever loved wants to use you. That's the IMF! That's spywork, baby! Ethan doesn't realize it in the beginning, but he sure figures it out by the end. it's impossible for ethan to make it out of MI1 without becoming part of the corrupt world of the IMF, the real IMF that Claire and Jim and Kittridge are in, not the fantasy of the team in the opening. (to go back to the green knight metaphor--he has to take the sash in order to live--and even though that means compromising his morals, he's blameless. Corrupt, forever, but blameless.)

despite that--ethan is not the IMF. He believes in Claire. He believes in Luther. He avoids killing. he has an honor code that he sticks to even as he gets deeper and deeper into the sea of lies. that's what makes him the guy we see in the rest of the franchise, that at arguably his most vulnerable point, his most corrupt point, he believed in the people he loved and tried not to hurt anyone. The point of the sin, to me, is that Ethan is forced into the deep end of the murkiest grey moral waters and held underneath, and in the process he sacrifices moral purity for moral integrity and makes it out alive. and the movie doesn't hate him for it. He's a hero.

lots of thoughts for this ask lmfao thank you very much anon for indulging me. and thank you for reading the fic. i am so glad you liked it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#mission impossible #long post #mission impossible 1 #claire phelps #jim phelps #ethan hunt #max mitsopolis #jim phelps evil polycule

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sleepgarden · 8 months

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I would love to hear more about that quote if you’re comfortable sharing!!

Yes! Okay I'll write it under a readmore- content warnings for abuse and trauma, in this specific case sexual. ...It ended up very long, I'm sorry >< !! I hope it all makes sense at least.

Now that I'm actually about to write it I realize how much context i need to give, so I'll try to do it as simply as possible but this is actually the first time im talking about this piece in depth, so it may still be a little messy..

At the time of making the piece I was at the end of a very long and hurtful relationship. During that relationship I was coerced, taken advantage of, and had my decline of consent ignored (that's one way to put it.. its hard to talk about lol). The timeline leading up to the illustration is hard to explain, but some time before is when i started accepting that i was trans. I allowed myself to see me as i am, explore my identity, approach my own thoughts/feelings with curiosity instead of fear. I gained a lot of confidence in that time (at least, compared to what i had before!) but i kept it a secret from my then-partner as they werent exactly accepting. With this newfound confidence though I expressed some desires to them that they gave a very clear and solid no to, so I immediately dropped it and moved on. (I should also say, i never really asked for anything in that relationship before. The things my partner did made me think that i was asexual for years, lmao) Later, nearing the end of it, is when i started realizing how truly awful the things they did were and how deeply it affected me. I felt like I had given (been taken from, actually) so much and had nothing to show for it. I also had the realization when thinking back about when I myself asked for something too but was told no, just how easy it was to accept that. In fact is was impossible to imagine not accepting it and getting them to do what i wanted anyways.

So to now explain the phrase "and now with thorns of his own, its the roses call to endure" The thorns are the shift of the dynamic, where as before the rose was the only one with them, the character in the illustration had now grown his own. Equally awful to touch or be touched by. He calls on the rose to endure just as he did. But, of course, I didnt feel that way. I would never want to do that to someone. I could never expect that from them, you know? How could I? And thats just it- thats where the anger came from: How could they?

The realization of what its like on the other end to be told "no" and to imagine pushing them to deal with it regardless was infuriating. The illustration calls on the rose to endure, but the anger in the piece is about asking it to do so. It's such an impossible thing to imagine doing, but something that I experienced for years. I was angry with myself for going through that, I was angry with them for everything they did, and i put it all in that illustration. It was genuinely one of the most healing illustrations ive ever made, and i officially ended the relationship soon after.

With all illustrations there really is more to it than can be said with a blanket explanation like that. But the major emotional force was driven by those things, if that makes sense? I am glad people can connect to this piece or see themself in their own way, however they interpret it. I've had people say they feel seen with it, or that its satisfying to them, and it fills my heart so much that it aches. As i said before, its bittersweet, but so meaningful to me.

I wrote this earlier today and while reviewing the draft I see how messy it is, but I'm going to post anyways! I apologize if it's incoherent- it's hard to tall about complex emotions like that. And due to how personal it is (the most personal I've ever been online I think) I'll delete it sometime in the future. Anyways, thank you again for reaching out about it! I don't get a chance to talk about my work very often. ♡

Thank you anyone who ready all that as well!

#Very messy and some parts aren't clear but it's okay. The gist is there I think #Have a wonderful day ♡

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gomacave · 2 months

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Lol, it is sooo nice to come across someone who still cares about kkm in 2024 😭 just gonna send as an ask so we aren't tag paragraphing back and forth. (Tried just messaging, but you know the tumblr app's reliabilty...)

I have so many thoughts on wolfram and yuuri as people and how they would work as a couple

Re: your original tags i 100% agree that yuuri would be the one to initiate their actual relationship with a kiss he didn't even put any thought into, body just acted.

I've had this vague fanfic idea in my head for the past like... 10 years (i can't believe i first watched it so long ago) that after getting used to wolfram being his best friend and enjoying being around him in that way for a couple years yuuri would start to catch feelings without even realizing it. Then he'd kiss wolfram in some dramatic dangerous context (like your comic) and immediately fall through a puddle back to earth once the danger is over, without getting the chance to talk to wolfram about it.

And then yuuri is just like, stuck on earth for a whole month or 2. Ruminating on the kiss, using 2007 style discussion boards to try to figure out his sexuality (😂 poor kid). Maybe watching some random movie (i genuinely don't have a specific one in mind) and realizing that the 2 male main characters have crazy chemisty, remembering something about shipping from that discussion board, searching male character A x male character B and reading some fanfic/seeing some fanart that makes him go "shit maybe i am into guys." Then he like... reads a real romance novel or something that his mom buys him (a teen book! I should clarify. His mom is quirky but not totally oblivous to what would be appropriate), because she's supportive and knows he'd never buy one on his own. And he talks to her a few times about this realization throughout this 2 months.

Basically, i like the idea of yuuri being forced away from wolfram and all the normalized queerness of shin makoku and still coming to the conclusion that he likes wolfram and wants to be with him. And "hey, im not even gonna be living on earth much past the age of 18 anyway, so why should i care about any of these cultural norms anymore? And my family gets it, so honestly, fuck it."

And then he finally gets back to shin makoku and word vomits/lays this 2 months worth of soul searching at wolfram's feet.

And wolfram is just like, "well it's actually been 8 months or something for me. Glad you figured all that shit out, even though i still don't get what the big deal was, but i definitely panic spiralled into thinking you weren't coming back ever again because of that kiss. So honestly, i'm pretty happy right now. But ngl, you reciprocating my feelings is a little... off putting? No, maybe more like... completely unexpected. I'm in no way prepared for this."

And then their dynamic switches to wolfram being the one who's kind of uncomfortable with public displays of affection (he still likes it, but is noticeably shy/tense). And yuuri just trying his best to not spook wolfram and understand why he's like this now.

And it all just culminates in them having a talk in bed before the fall asleep a couple months after yuuri comes back where wolfram trys to explain how high up on a pedestel yuuri is in his mind and how, to him, it feels like them actually being together is just dragging yuuri down. And how yes, he loves yuuri romantically, but it's also so much more than that. He loves him as his untouchable best friend who he was JUST getting used to always being out of romatic reach when yuuri got spirited away to earth for 8 months. He loves yuuri as his king. He loves him as an IDEAL. So being with him as his actual fiancé is going to be a slow process. It's a lot to recontextualize in wolfram's head.

But yuuri is fine with that because he's like 18ish/still a teenager at this point and wasn't ready to get married immediately anyway.

Thanks for the invite to head canon dump on you. It feels good to share these vague ideas for a story i'll never write with another person who GETS the ship in the same way i do 💞

I'm also eager to hear any head canons/ideas you have about these 2. We're def on the same wavelength in terms of wanting to give the characters in kkm more context and agency outside of it being a silly little fantasy adventure thing (with a weirdly well fleshed out world, to be fair) 😂

REAL....... ur so real for everything here..... i think this is 100% how it would go. love the 2007 forums 😭 hes troubleshooting his homosexuality like its a game bug or smth thats so in-character i also agree w the wolf being startled by the reciprocation thing like he would 100% not be able to handle yuuri becoming "real" to him. like an actual option to date and stuff cuz my hc (bc i love suffering) is that he kind of likes or its convenient? that yuuri doesn't reciprocate cuz its so easy to be devoted when u dont have an actual relationship to talk abt and its one sided. it also gets more fanatical that way (aka yearning is stronger when it is left unfulfilled LOL) i also feel like he doesnt deserve it 2 some degree, not that hes not confident but that it's not his place. i feel like this is common in fanart/fic but where yuuri is like ok so can we kiss now and wolf is like ? kiss? we are a symbolic union between blah blah blah

BUT YEAH...... ALSO I LOVE THEM HAVING TALKS TOGETHER IN BED its just so.... like nice 2me...... the vibe of like having to sleep together.. the heart to hearts in bed is so funny but nice. the 16 year olds having a heart to heart while playing house (as a married couple) like the dissonance between their emotional immaturity and the tension and the closeness between them is so juicyyyy like SLEEPOVER TIME except ur discussing ur divorce arc w a 16 year old boysoldier who wants to die for you So Bad

my personal hcs/pure self indulgent bs under cut

ok first i feel like i have to clarify that i dont think that my hcs are canon i just like to have fun w kkm chars like dolls lmfaoooo..... but here are my self indulgent how-they-get-together-hcs ALSO its been like a solid two or three months since i last thought in depth abt kkm so i might be messing some details up

i kinda like the idea of wolf drifting apart from yuuri (from his constant rejection as well as duty and circumstance) and yuuri never reciprocates during this time (also never realizes) and eventually wolf goes off to bielefelt to do his duties and become the patriarch after everything settles. (i also like greta a lot so this is where she goes off to her own nation and wanders as a knight and alsooooo has a lesbianism with beatrice at around 20? years old..?) ANYWAYS they're in kind of awkward limbo and 2 yuuri wolf is someone he wishes he was closer to like when they were kids but isn't and he also avoids him from the guilt/shame of rejecting his feelings

at this pt yuuri has noticed in hindsight that he was in love w wolf but anyways something happens (like an attack) and wolf and yuuri are stuck living together again, wolf is once again risking his life for yuuri and his actions sort of betray that he's still just as in love w him as he was before they separated, he just decided that it would be better not to burden him with his feelings (at this pt he's self-aware that 16 year old wolf had a lot of baggage and codependency lumped in with love like the deifying stuff) and eventually yuuri reveals that he thinks he was in love with him too and wolf has to confront the fact that he wasn't looking for romance in the first place and also that yuuri is still too bright for him to touch (in his mind) so he's kinda like i do my job and u do urs for the good of this nation. BUT OFC they eventually get together after a lot of awkward divorcedness YAAAYYYYYYYY

OH ALSO unrelated to prev scenario but one thing i love ab ur hc and teen yuuram is the contrast between the world-ending desperation of wolf's love and the teenage first crush sweetness of yuuri's. I LOVE THE IDEA OF WOLF BEING LIKE. "i would die on the cross for you" (wiping the blood from his brow) and yuuri's just like "ok lets take this one step at a time" the part of the ship that's just yuuri getting to be an awkward gay teen and wolf eventually discovering awkward teen crushisms is sooo cute to me. like discovering that holding hands in a romantic context does not at all feel like what they did in the closet!! soo sweet and cute

ok ty for listening THIS IS SO LONG IM SORRRRYYYYYYYYY 😭😭😭😭 feel free 2 throw ur hcs at me anytime...!!! ^^

#i have sooo many hcs LMAO most of them wolf-centric but mannnnnn ask me anytime abt wolf and shinou 😔or ill draw the comic ig....#i havent finished kkm anime actually im one ep away from finishing it but i got caught up and scared to finish it so #txt #i forgor my ask tag #and also my kkm rambles tag #OH WAIT its #gomakkm #cave mail #also ur so right about yuuri's journey of self acceptance as well as the crush thing love to see the sociopolitical differences explored!

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a-wondering-thought · 6 months

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HI 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

(i pull this shit with anyone i follow who has anything remotely in common with me. the moots who know, know 😔😔 sorry)

tis i cristie your new crazy follower!! we have a mighty lot in common 👀👀 okok to the actual asks:

1. favourite YA book and favourite classic book? (i like separating these because one is usually for fandomy entertainment and one is for laughing at gay idiots (affectionate) marvelling over the mind of the author and the beauty of the prose) (also the picture of dorian gray is looking at you with giant puppy eyes rn PICK IT)

2. favourite osemanverse, riordanverse and grishaverse character? (wow universes galore) (also i’ve only read heartstopper so i am not acquainted with the rest of the osemanverse books)

3. have you by any chance read good omens. or watched the tv adaptation which is most possibly one of the only good tv adaptations i have watched in this lifetime. (idk why i always start with read when the show is more popular) you probably haven’t. idk why i asked this. but you should read it. or watch it. or both. yes 👁️👄👁️

4. finally, pick: devotion or rivalry

—

i do realise that when people receive these asks they regard this with a mixture of mild terror and awkwardness so i apologise for that 😀

hiiiii new mutual!!! im vi and i too am crazy so im glad to have another crazy mutual :D

favourite YA book is hard ngl, i think not including soc any osemanverse and pjo/hoo books my favourite ya book is Girl, Goddess, Queen by Bea Fitzgerald. its a Hades and Persephone retelling(i love greek mythology) and Persephone is so badass in it' and i think my favourite classical book is A Little Princess because of reading it when i was younger but im not sure if its classed as a classic? if its not then maybe sense and sensibility? it was the first Jane Austin book i read and im very sorry to disappoint the puppy eyes but i haven't actually read the picture of dorian gray yet which i know is scandalous and i do have a copy but i just haven't gotten round to reading it yet but *aristocrat voice* i might have to start now so that i might please the puppy eyes *swoops off hat and bows*

ahhh you should defiantly read their other books they are amazing! but my favourite osemanverse character is Tori Spring (aka the whole reason i started my blog) my favourite Riordanverse character is Nico Di Angelo(but i do love Blitzen from mc too) and my favourite grishaverse characters are Inej Ghafa and Wylan Hendriks(van eck) (also yes two pls dont make me decide) (and yessss universe galore i love it sm)

im very sorry but no i have not as i have a habit of starting a ton of shows and then taking months to finish them(i currently have seven main ones but three not so main ones and i longgg list of to watches) i do have a lot of mutuals that love the show tho so its on my shows i want to watch list and i have been meaning to watch it so i might soon(im considering just trying to binge it) and idk if my local library has the book but i have seen some of Neil gaimen so if they do i might read it

hmmm im not sure what context you mean(you probably did that on purpose im just stupid) but overall i think devotion bc rivalry can cause conflict which im afraid of :D

___

and dont apologize this was so fun!!! one of the best asks i've ever gotten for sure!! thank you sm for sending me it! and i wanted to ask if we could be friends? and could message you? (dont worry if not) (its just you seem really cool and amazing!!)

#answered #vi screams into the void

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rozugold · 1 year

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Hello friend!!

Apologies for the wait it took me to respond to you — I only just checked back in with my ao3 account and noticed your comment, and since you don’t have an account yourself I’m unsure if you’d see my reply. So here I am, plaguing your inbox with it instead! I do hope it isn’t a bother, haha.

I was really very happy to see your name again. Admittedly I’ve saved all the incredible artwork my fic received over the course of my writing it, but yours genuinely have a very special place in my heart as some of the first and last I ever received. I still recall opening my inbox and seeing the notification the first time; it was so surreal to me that people would draw anything based on my works. Your art of Tommy and Techno sitting back to back, as well as your art of the forest trio at the end, serve almost as mental book-ends for me; I return to them often just to admire it, and to remember how happy it all made me. I can hardly believe it’s been more than two years, goodness.

I was also shocked to hear you may be putting together a playlist—if you would be so kind, I would love to know what songs might be on it! At your leisure of course, and only if you feel like sharing it, the thought alone is more than enough <3 thank you kindly for all of your support, truly, and once again for your gorgeous art. The memories have gotten me through many a dark day.

- Que (WWHWI)

HELLOOO QUEEEE it’s so good to hear from you again :D!!!! And yeah I should really get on getting an account already, it would probably make things a lot more convenient. BUT account or not you’re always welcomed to plague my inbox :]

And waaa I’m happy that you still like the fanart I made! I’m glad it’s stuck with you as much as your writing has stuck with me. SPEAKING OF WRITING I forgot you had so much of it??? Once life settles down a bit im definitely gonna make my way through them, so don’t be surprised if you see my name in the comments later on eheheh

AND YES PLAYLIST!! OK if I’m gonna be honest, the reason I started making this is because of god of war sjshSJDHD Every time I get into new media it only gives me ideas for the old media I’m trying to escape /j Two years man, and still these blorbos live in my brain rent free

I’m gonna ramble about each song now >:D warning spoilers for if you hadn’t read the fic!

First is Cave by Cody Fry! I wanted an instrumental to start it off and a song to represent the explosion of Manburg; I think this song serves that purpose well!

Half-Mast by Branches is a song I use in my other dsmp related playlists to represent Doomsday but it works so well in this context

^ this bit especially reminds me of Tommy and Wilbur ;;;;;

Casualty by Hidden Citizens & Tash is just absolutely perfect for Tommy. The scene of him screaming out in grief surrounded by the rubble that used to be his home- waaa it’s so good, both the song and scene

Sorrow by Sleeping at Last is for Tommy slowly learning how to live after the explosion (or at least learn how to function again :[ pobrecito..)

The Corner Dwellers by The Vocal Few is a Techno and Tommy song! It simply reminds me of them :’]

To Forgive or to Kill by Bear McCreary was chosen mostly for the title and the fact that it was from the God of War soundtrack skdhdhdh Incase you’re unfamiliar with the game, this song plays during a scene where one of the main characters is debating on whether to forgive or kill another character but ultimately realizes that she can’t do either. So naturally I thought this song would be good for when Tommy saves Schlatt from Technoblade! I’d like to have more instrumentals in this playlist but we shall see,, I’m very picky when it comes to instrumentals skdjddj

Carnivore by Bear Attack! Ok I might replace this song with something else later since it reminds me of c!Tommy and c!Dream’s relationship more than Tommy and Schlatt’s from WWHWI. But it’s works for now! Something to represent their first argument chat after the whole getting locked up bit

Marble Floors by Vian Izak & Juniper Vale is here to sorta represent Tommy longing for his life before the explosion and when he still had Tubbo.

^ also just,, this bit.. Ow

Drown by Seafret is for when Tommy gets blown up by the creeper. Just that scene where it starts off as a dream sequence then slowly twists until he’s suddenly shocked back into reality— GOSH it’s so good. And then the crisis he has afterwards when he bandages himself up, it’s probably my favorite scene. It’s so well done and makes me feel so much ;;;;;

Battling Life by The Dunwells is for Technoblade!! (And a little for Tommy too, now that I’m looking at the lyrics again) Gosh, the man gets injured but he doesn’t let that stop him from taking care of things and taking care of Tommy. You captured his perseverance and stubbornness perfectly :’]

Blood Upon the Snow by Hozier & Bear McCreary! Here I go, to shamelessly smoosh two of my interests together again skdhdj This song is also for Technoblade but more for his exhausted god-ness you characterize him with. (Atleast I think he’s a god in WWHWI? Or is he just a well known champion? Immortal? My memory sucks, I’ll have to find out when I reread it) This song is just super cool and reminded me of technoblade and is part of the reason why I started making this playlist skdjdjjd

Brother by Kodaline… what is there to say? They’re brothers :’’] BUT ALSO WHILE SKIMMING CHAPTER 15 EARLIER I FOUND THIS LINE: “"Stay here," he said to the man who'd long since become his family…” HELLO?? EXCuse me while I go sob

Sirens by Oliver Daldry, I may be wildly misinterpreting this song for this playlist but SCREW IT it reminds me of them okay

This repeating lyric serves as a little nod to the fact that this is an au. How Techno, Tommy and Schlatt would have all been strangers in this world if certain circumstances didn’t lead them to eachother

This bit reminds me of Schlatt @ Tommy, I don’t think he ever outright asks for forgiveness but in time they both find some peace with eachother.

All three of them are so different from eachother but they still care for eachother :’]

The Cave by Mumford & Sons acts as a sort of summary of this story to me! I imagine the first verse is from Techno’s pov, the second is from Tommy’s, and the last is from Schlatt’s.

This bit changes meaning depending on the pov. For Techno it’s him taking care of Tommy, ‘changing his ways’ yknow, or atleast adding the family role to his list of titles.

For Tommy it’d be him taking care of Techno, “finding strength in pain” and learning to move forward despite everything that’s happened

And for Schlatt it’s for him rushing out to help Tommy and Techno during the final battle. Man doesn’t even hesitate :’D

Gosh and just the line “I’ll know my name as it’s called again”. All three of them grew into people they never thought they’d be!! And despite a huge part of their lives is shaped from tragedy they’re okay in the end. It was far from easy but they’re okay. And that’s just so comforting yknow? This story is so comforting and beautiful and raw and I just love it with all my being ;;;;;

Wow that was long and a little all over the place lol!! I’m still working on this playlist as I go but that’s all I have so far :]

#I hope you can see why this took so long to answer sjsgsjk #also it makes me so happy that the playlist starts and ends with a song named Cave :]#rozu asks #anonymous #WWHWI

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cleromancy · 6 months

Text

actually. still thinking about the stuff i mentioned in this post about like. people getting disproportionately mad at jason for mia compared to. like. any other supervillain that is *absolutely* also supposed to be somewhat sympathetic. like, thinking of two-face here in robin: year one (the dixon/beatty version).

because harveys role in the plot is adjacent to what Jason's is. he poses a clear danger to robin that makes the guardian/mentor reconsider the wisdom of having a kid sidekick at all. jason's actually there to make mia think about it, moreso than ollie, but their role as the antagonist of the story raises similar questions.

and i get that with comics in particular, your emotional reaction to what you read will always be influenced by what you see the fandom doing, and you do have... like im fairly sure the harv apologists are just like "i dont care who he hurt he looked good doing it" (and tbeyre so valid for that). and by comparison the jason legion, for we are many, are this whole scatterplot range of--some people only like him as a villain/think hes "unredeemable" (🙄), and some people want every bad thing hes ever done to be whooshed away by "pit madness" (🙄), and some people who. i have no ill will towards them but theyre fans of the new guy, the prime earth guy, and thats just a different character from my guy to the point that hes not even really relevant to ga 69-72 when we talk about it-- but nevertheless theyre in the same fandom, and the guy they like has the same name. so that can color peoples interpretations of whats on the page jf, for example, any of those factions really grates their cheese.

anyway. all that aside i do still feel like people get very angry at jason for being the antagonist--being a supervillain, even--maybe because he's so sympathetic by comparison in under the red hood/lost days (or i guess stuff the new guy's been in, if thats more your speed). like why did he terrorize mia! why did he scare her and beat her up!

and while i think the answer to that, from a character motivation perspective, is so obvious as to be. fucking asinine to need it spelled out-- the real answer is because as the storys antagonist he is there to challenge the protagonist. and in this case the challenge is not only the physical fight, its also a challenge to the question of whether or not plucky teen sidekicks should still exist in a post-death in the family dcu, where the baddies are badder and anyone can die.

r:yo was never asking that *specific* question, so lets just set it aside. thank you for your help harvey.

jason is a much easier target for reader anger than ollie because well. jason is absolutely doing something *wrong,* and he knows it, but he also has a fucking point, *and he knows it.*

ga01 was ABSOLUTELY engaging with and exploring aspects of the kid/teen sidekick trope that we know and love--mia kills a man on her test run, and the responsibility for mia being in a position where she felt like she had to do that, and the resulting trauma, is placed squarely and correctly on ollies shoulders. mias origin story meant she was never safe in her fucking life until she moved in with ollie, and now she finds out its left her with something permanent and life-changing--shes HIV+. what is safety? what is childhood? what does she want out of life, faced with her own mortality? she wants to help people. she wants to be a hero. and the way this unfolds, in the context of the dcu and how it works, you can see why ollie says yes this time. (and im so so glad he did.)

and jason shows up 20ish issues later when shes good and established to be like, "hi. you sure about that?"

and this is a chicken or the egg kind of situation where jason would not have done this to a civilian. shes a superhero. shes in uniform. there is an inherent danger to doing that and while you know that--both you the reader and you, speedy, green arrows junior partner and teen titan--nobody demonstrates it like jason "trolley problem" todd, both as the first notable dead sidekick and an incredibly dangerous, incredibly *terrifying* person. one who is *hell-bent* on *proving* it to you.

and when i say chicken and egg i mean while jason's responsible for his own actions, Ollie is explicitly responsible for mia's safety. imo blowing up the school wasn't to scare mia--it was to scare ollie. jason took the stakes of what it means to be speedy, or to *have* a speedy, and made them concrete. and that takes the concept of a plucky teen sidekick and makes it uncomfortable again because, god, she's just a kid. should she really be fucking doing this? (should her guardian really be *letting* her do this?)

(and people forget this, or purposely ignore it, but jason cant be more than 2 years older than her in this continuity, using tim as a benchmark. and i say this not because i want to emphasize that he would see mia as a peer rather than a child--though he would--or to imply he wasnt responsible for his actions--he was. i say this bc what was he doing in the supervillainy, he should have been at the club)

what i was getting at was i think rather than allowing the concept to exist in that gray area it is so much easier, so much more comfortable, to instead just be like. Well jason shouldn't have done that. he could have done it a different way. if he never put her in danger she wouldn't have been in that danger that night. and yknow all of those things are true but they don't negate the point he was making (and he was also doing more than that yk but this post is already Long lol), which was that that uniform puts a target on her chest. are you prepared for what that means?

and the difference between jason doing this, and Harvey, aside from the relative annoyingness of the people who want to condemn or exonerate them, is that. jason is not just a supervillain. he is a victim of *exactly* this thorny question. and he became a supervillain directly in response to this. you can not separate his actions here from the part where he knows what the fuck hes talking about, because it happened to him. and to make that less thorny, less uncomfortable, the focus turns away from the point he was making back to. Well he shouldn't have done it like he did it. while also ignoring that...... he did it like he did it because he knew how it felt, what it meant, to be a hero. if he didn't do it like he did it, would it have gotten through to them at all? would we still be talking about it like 20 years later?

anyway jason did such a good job posing uncomfortable questions in the narrative 🥰 im so proud of him for all his hard work!

#dc #text #he doesnt get a gold star though. only good boys get gold stars

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timidloner · 1 year

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wait im touched, go ahead and steal all the ideas you want from me, i am a willing subject of the greatness of your grand scheme jajaja it's honestly an honor if you were serious about that (and if you need opinions, you know im always there to give them)(on a more serious note, im glad you enjoy my thoughts as much as i enjoy yours <3) and vulnerability between two people that could kill each other is always such a banger because THEY COULD but THEY WONT because they like each other (yes, im ignoring every other MCs that will try to kill joren)

i know in the context of the ask about MC embrancing death, joren's reaction is not supposed to be ohohoh but the "hell make you scream" and "hell make you cry" are kind of... don't threaten me with a good time you know and for the adopting kids, why do i feel like if MC ever expressed randomly they wanted kids joren would be the type to just grab a random orphan and bring it home like here, all proud like a cat that brings a dead mice to its master while MC is like JOREN NO- and for the tongue, now im wondering first how it would go to kiss with it? i feel like it wouldnt be all that bad but im biased so better to ask and by any chance, for the second question, would joren lick wounds with it because i suppose as he was mistreated in the past, he had to take care of his wounds by himself somehow (?) and that leads to the question if MC cut their finger, would he lick the cut...... cause thatd be cute - ram

0Yeah! Of course, I was serious about that! It's great to hear other people's ideas, it makes me consider new concepts I wouldn't have otherwise. And you've given me a lot of inspiration with yours <3

And yes! I love that vulnerability. I especially can't wait to write the branches where MC becomes a bigger menace than Joren and now they're on equal ground to kill each other, but they're in love <33, so they won't do that (me too ram, let's ignore his death endings).

I get it! The moment is supposed to be "oh no", but as the player, sometimes you feel other things. I've experienced it before, and there was this murdersim game that kinkshamed me for it! Could you believe it? Literally called me a pervert, haha!

I lowkey felt a little ashamed afterward, but it was funny.

I wish I could write it like that, but I really have no idea where he could even find a kid in the "child-friendly Joren" epilogue, but it'd be accurate if the environment permitted it.

Ah, I meant the tongue of his monster form!! In his human form, there's no problem with kissing or anything like that!

And this may be kind of a surprise, but his injuries received basic care. He joined the service of the noble house to survive, after all, he had to get something in exchange for... the things he did for them.

But this makes me think about his life after that, when he's already free and living on his own. I imagine him spending large amounts of time in his monster form and getting accustomed to grooming himself with his tongue, just like cats do. And when he's back in his human form, he has to fight against the urge of doing it because it has become a habit.

Joren acting like a cat hits differently, it's very cute.

Joren taking naps under the Sun, rubbing his face against MC's chest/neck/stomach while cuddling, resisting the urge of chasing little animals (birds, lizards), waiting to groom MC with his tongue, sleeping in weird positions that should be uncomfortable, hugging MC and fighting the random urge of biting them out of nowhere...

And yeah, if MC cut their finger, he'd totally lick it if he's already crossed some boundaries by then. He'd be pretty nonchalant about it too, just following the random urges he gets sometimes.

#ask away!#from lon to you #rambling✒️!!!#the stranger lore #i saw the asks you sent today too!!#ill answer them as soon as i can!!

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lutawolf · 2 years

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Hi Luta!

Thank you so much for how you worded your feelings on the sex scene in ep 8. I didn’t read much of the novel but I got the same vibe you did, I definitely think the show made it seem less like a joke and a much higher stakes situation. I’m not a victim of SA nor do I have any experience in sex work so I wasn’t sure how to word my opinion in a way that was conscious of the fact that this was definitely (from Sky’s perspective) coercive.

I also think people are a little harsh on Prapai, he was making a joke (in his mind) about getting paid in sex. From what we see he’s pushy but not intimidating and has no problem picking people up when he wants sex. He had no context for Sky’s background or how sky would take his joke, so I don’t really blame him for sleeping with sky under those circumstances. From his perspective he met a cute guy and got him out of trouble, made a (definitely in poor taste) joke of a come on and the guy accepted. Consistently throughout them having sex he allows sky to set the pace and sky is an active and (apparently) enthusiastic participant, of course he thought they both had a good time! We couldn’t really expect more from him then that, considering he’s working with much less context than we as viewers are. He’s a fuck boy for sure but not a predator, he’s even shown in the episode to be a fairly considerate lover to his other hook ups.

Blegh sorry for the word vomit. I just am very frustrated about bad faith takes on what I saw as a poor choice in directorial/editing choices.

Thank you for giving me a reaction I can send to people to explain my thought process on the whole thing!! Im excited to see Pai grovel and wheedle his way into Sky’s heart as he learns more and realizes he needs to be mature for once! Here’s hoping this is a messy start to a good story

Hey nonnie!!!

Let me first say for my other readers here. I 100% respect anyone who saw the scene as sexual assault. The book could very well be covering my view point. I kept bringing up the book because I did want to help those who hadn't read it know that it isn't supposed to be sexual assault.

I truly believe the show handled this badly. Yet I'm in the mindset. It was handled badly but we know what it should be like. Let's move forward with that mindset. Hopefully we can salvage this.

To be fair guys. What is supposed to happen during sex in the book is that Sky is sad except when he has sex. That's what draws Pai in. Is this sad kid who lights up when having sex with him. Who is sensual and knows what he wants. I just don't think they were able to make that come across.

He's a total fuck boy. I can't wait to see the progress. I'm really excited to see this progress. This and the revenge part are the hardest part to transfer from book to show. The rest should be golden ✨️ So I'm looking forward to it.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read my jumbled thoughts. Glad you enjoyed it! 💜💜💜

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stopscammingartists · 9 months

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you know whats annoying about you? you refuse direct conversation so you can always easily ignore others words. boxley was never about him being embarassed or annoyed, its you consistently refusing what he asks of you because you want to run with your version of what happened over his. thats what this is about.

its you insisting boxley doesnt understand what his feelings are and that the contextless roleplay you love reposting is an actual personal conversation.

you listen to victims only when they agree with you. but when someone you beleive is a victims disagrees then their words are wrong. you have demonstrated this repeatedly.

if boxley said things you liked youd have no issue coddling up to him for a free supply of new reasons to hate glip, when he proved he wasnt going to do that all your performative care evaporated.

you talk about how your only reason for still being here is to protect victims, i dont believe that. you clearly have more reasons than that for this kind of behavior.

i dont beleive you ever cared about boxley as a victim, you care about him as a topic to leverage against glip, and that is why you cant let it go.

if you cared about boxley, even if you beleived he was wrong, you would make an effort to keep him out of your public discourse, make an effort to connect him to resorces that may help. you have done nothing of the sort.

im not interested in your whataboutism about how glip ignored X victim at Y time too. answer for your own actions. make an effort to stop ignoring the words of others.

Yeah, okay buddy.

Need I remind you that one of the victims who are with us directly conversed with Glip and Pengo in a chain of emails recently? You know, the email chain where Glip changed their story from them raping 1 dog to them raping 2 dogs? Surely you know of it.

Oh, and, just so we’re clear, if we didn’t want people to talk to us, we wouldn’t have a whole blog open for anonymous asks. You are talking to us directly right now, just in a more email-like fashion.

The floraverse community and Glip themselves have pushed the narrative of our blog being terrible people who do not care. Pengo has compared us to Nazis and white supremacists for fucks sake. The well is poisoned, and you think us to be dumb enough to reach in and drink from it and privately talk with y'all? Fat fucking chance.

As for Boxley, Boxley hasn’t provided any evidence pointing to a different story. They have access to the same tools we do when it comes to archiving information, so if they really want to tell the ‘real’ story they can. Unfortunately for Boxley, ‘our version of events’ are how things happened. If they don’t like that, maybe they should recognize that, and really think about what that means for the environment they exist in.

its you insisting boxley doesnt understand what his feelings are and that the contextless roleplay you love reposting is an actual personal conversation.

Abuse is not just the ‘feelings’ of a victim. It is a set definition of poor behavior and mistreatment towards an individual, and what happened to Boxley fits right in. Here, viewers, see for yourself. Does this look like roleplay? Does this look kind?

We have provided multiple sources indicating a victim is very often unaware of their own mistreatment until they are shown otherwise by outsiders or when their abusers pushes the envelope too far in their abusive behavior.

As for this ‘contextless roleplay’, we’d be glad to have the full context in full, unedited screenshots. But that means you have to provide that context, and since you’re too busy sucking off Glip and co, I guess we’ll have to wait for it. But, since you decided to send a public, performative ask instead of trying to submit the screenshots showing said context, I have a sneaking feeling that context doesn’t exist. So that leaves us with just that archive, and, man, Glip sure sounds like an abusive tyrant to me.

As a side note, the scene isn’t even a real roleplay either. There is no ‘role’ being played here, they are acting as themselves, just without the handy dandy Floraverse-patented soft bitch filter. Roleplays involve characters. Roleplays do not handle real baggage between people. This is not a re-enactment, this is Glip letting loose their frustrations in the meanest, cruelest way they can.

And for the record- 'roleplays' tend to not come with fucking homework at the end of it.

you listen to victims only when they agree with you. but when someone you beleive is a victims disagrees then their words are wrong. you have demonstrated this repeatedly.

Hmm, yes, the floor is made out of floor. I’m sorry, do you regularly say the words of somebody you disagree with are right? The whole concept of agreeing and disagreeing is whether you think a person’s words and stance are correct or incorrect. You’re ragging on us for…disagreeing with victims.....But where does that leave Glip? Who disagrees with the victims that run and support this blog?

By your own logic, not only is Glip and co doing exactly that but you are as well. You deserve an around of applause for that level of density.

Oh, by the way? Listening is required to argue with someone. Like the thing we’re doing right now to your own words, or the thing we have done numerous times with other victims. Like the thing we have done time and time again with Boxley himself.

if boxley said things you liked youd have no issue coddling up to him for a free supply of new reasons to hate glip, when he proved he wasnt going to do that all your performative care evaporated.

No? Boxley already gave us free reasons to hate Glip whether we like them or not.

I don’t give a flying fuck about having new reasons or chances to hate Glip. There's plenty of that already. I care about people staying far, far away from the cesspit the dogfucker calls home.

Also, hey, stupid, we severed ties with one of the people in our group, another victim of your community, as we refused to let them harass one of your own. You know who I'm talking about.

you talk about how your only reason for still being here is to protect victims, i dont believe that. you clearly have more reasons than that for this kind of behavior.

And what exactly is your reason for making a public ask to state this? It must be to call us out, right? That’s why you didn’t bring any receipts and didn’t bother to research the situation at all, right?

Hm. Clearly you have more reasons than that for this kind of behavior.

Believe what you want. Based on the way you’ve conducted this message, I really don’t care what you have to think or say. Your delusions are not my problem.

i dont beleive you ever cared about boxley as a victim, you care about him as a topic to leverage against glip, and that is why you cant let it go.

Funny you mention that. For the past few months every single mention of Boxley beyond the site is because the asks sent talk about him. Usually by an unfriendly anon who is clearly in the Floraverse community. Like you.

In fact, you were the one who brought them up again. You and the other anon asks care a whole lot more about Boxley as a topic than we do. And I say topic because you don’t seem to care about Glip putting Boxley through that abuse. You guys only talk about how Boxley doesn't consider the behavior abusive. Never having anything to say about Glips behavior itself. What? Is it that you recognize that there is no defending Glips cruel, abusive behavior here?

This isn't the Floraverse server. Your lapdogging isn’t going to fly here.

First off, actually we did provide resources to Boxley, time and time again we provided resources on how abuse can happen without the victim recognizing it. We also have resources on recognizing cult behavior on the website. Boxley knows it exists and knows how to find it, they just don’t care to believe or bother to look into those resources. The fact that they have ended up having interactions with this blog is proof enough they know where to look if they need assistance.

Second off, the victim’s wishes are very important in most circumstances. This is not one of them. Let’s go over the facts, shall we?

Boxley wants the logs purged for the sake of Glip and co

The logs were not given to us by Boxley nor were the logs made by Boxley. These logs where made by some nobody because your fucking server, and the channel this happened in is essentially public.

Boxley is still buddy buddy with Glip and co and is not in any trouble or danger from these logs being out to our knowledge

Based off of what we know and what we’ve seen in the various floraverse servers, and also based off of the fact that Glip makes private issues extremely public (Jolly and Rina say hi!), we have confidence to say that Boxley is not only not going to be harmed by these blogs keeping up beyond delusional people harassing them (which, by the way, we’ve always condemned) but that keeping the logs helps support our claims significantly enough to matter. We’ve put more thought into this one decision than you have this entire ‘callout’.

We're looking at the bigger picture here and that our focus has always been on letting people know how dangerous the Floraverse community is. We're not going to let evidence of that go for the sake of people still participating in the cult and hurting people through their participation.

im not interested in your whataboutism about how glip ignored X victim at Y time too. answer for your own actions. make an effort to stop ignoring the words of others.

It’s a good thing we didn’t bring any whataboutisms up here, huh? Oh, by the way, caring about people’s words isn’t a one way street. You can’t say you don’t care what we have to say and then expect us to give a fuck about what you have to say. I’m only doing this because I think it’s really funny to tell off a stupid person for being stupid.

Funny thing about accountability, anon. It’s universal. You telling us to answer for our actions means that Glip and co have to as well, and that means going beyond paper thin apologies that amount to nothing. You have to be consistent for your callouts to be worth a damn, and I have a funny feeling that you are about as consistent as our weather up north is. Feel free to prove me wrong, though, and ask Glip about how they feel about Opa sexually assaulting Jolly by showing them his genitals without Jolly's consent. Or why they lied about Iz's VN being about Rina's childhood sexual assault. Or why they lied about it only being one dog.

I find it hilarious you call us out for ignoring peoples words when you’ve ignored entire, vital pieces of a situation just to make your performative ask look more authoritative.

There’s a statement you made earlier that I want to round back to. You claimed that you knew that Boxley is what this is all about. While that is obviously incorrect, I think I’ve figured out what this ask is all about. You’re not here to actually provide criticism, are you? You’re not here to sway people’s minds, either. You’re here to be a big show-off about just how loyal you are to Floraverse and how you can take it to the Big Bad SSA, aren’t you? Enjoy the good favour while it lasts, anon. Lapdogging is never sustainable.

#floraverse #forbidden flora #glitchedpuppet #forbiddenflora #foxflux #pengosolvent #fox flux #glip #mod 4

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