#but it's also overwhelming how basically everything is founded in patriarchy | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

haggishlyhagging · 5 months

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It has been said that female separatism is radical feminism's natural and logical conclusion. Most radical feminists have chosen not to follow their politics all the way to that end and do what they can to avoid, ignore, or deny it. Anti-separatist feminists engage in what has been called "thought termination," meaning the act of refusing to follow one's own thoughts to their logical conclusions, in order to justify their decision to stay connected to males. They also encourage this thought termination in other women, wanting to undermine female separatism as a legitimate political and personal choice for their own selfish reasons.

When making political and feminist analysis or when attempting to determine in your own life if a particular decision is feminist or anti-feminist, it is useful to ask the ancient Roman legal question: "Cui bono?" or "Who benefits?" Of course, women do stand to gain certain rewards and privileges from engaging in male loyalism, misogyny, and anti-feminist actions, but whatever the matter at hand, an anti-feminist and anti-female decision will ultimately benefit males the most. When we ask "Who benefits the most?" from women and girls choosing to lead male-inclusive and male-centric lives, the answer is clear: males do.

The most recent studies have found that heterosexual marriage makes men happier and women more unhappy overall. The overwhelming majority of domestic labor and childcare continue to fall on the wife's shoulders in heterosexual marriage throughout the developed world, and this is true even while most married heterosexual women in developed countries work full-time throughout adulthood. Heterosexual and bisexual women openly admit to experiencing sex in their heterosexual relationships that ranges from inorgasmic and boring to violent, humiliating, and painful. Outside of heterosexual relationships, women and girls often find themselves on the losing side of unequal relationships with male family members and friends who take advantage of their labor, emotional and otherwise, and do not reciprocate or bother suppressing their sexism.

The power struggle between males and females has always been sexual, both in the carnal and reproductive sense. Even the word patriarchy rests on the sexual, social, and familial arrangements that exist in a predominantly heterosexual, mixed society where men and women live in constant contact with each other: rule of the father assumes that women and girls are in a position to be ruled, both socially and physically. It assumes the presence of a man.

Female separatism is the unavoidable, ultimate conclusion of radical feminist politics for the simple reason that separatism alone prevents the male objective driving men's oppression and domination of the female sex: using women and girls as sexual, domestic, social, and economic resources. If this is the point of patriarchy, how can anything other than female separatism be the solution to it? In a system where males already have all the power and control, women and girls will never be able to change their own status or achieve liberation from oppression through cooperating with males and granting them everything they demand.

Males want sexual access to female bodies above all else, and furthermore, they rely on women and girls to perform the domestic labor, social labor, and professional labor that keep men comfortable physically, emotionally, and psychologically. For thousands of years, men universally made sure that women and girls could not survive independently of them by locking us out of education, paid work, and the political arena and refusing to give us basic rights to own money and property. They knew and feared that if women had the option to survive and thrive apart from men, most of us would choose to do exactly that.

The only reason women now have the legal rights and protections that allow us to reject heterosexual marriage and motherhood is because we fought hard for those rights and protections over the course of at least a hundred years in developed countries, and we are still fighting all over the world, not only to gain what we lack but to protect what we have. Men have never yielded any political concessions to women willingly, easily, or readily. They have resisted us every step of the way, and they will never cease their attempts to take back the progress we've made.

If female separatism was of no consequence to the male sex, they wouldn't have spent all of recorded history making it virtually impossible. They wouldn't now be going out of their way to destroy any and all female-only spaces, both physical and digital, in the name of transgenderism. They would not have lorded physical and sexual violence over us since the beginning of time as punishment for our resistance and disobedience.

-Sekhmet She-Owl, “Female Separatism: The Feminist Solution” in Spinning And Weaving: Radical Feminism for the 21st Century

#Sekhmet She-Owl #female oppression #patriarchy #female separatism #radical feminist theory #male parasitism #male entitlement #male oppressors

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femreader · 3 years

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Chemoreceptors ➵ Michelle ”MJ” Jones

could i please request some cute flustered mj x reader, maybe mj could be trying to ask them out but she keeps on tripping on her pick up lines and such?

Summary: y/n finally has the guts to ask MJ out, awkwardness ensues

Pairing: Michelle “MJ” Jones x fem!reader

Warnings: none

Words: 1.5k

A/N: I changed it a little bit but, here you go?

MJ watched as you talked with your friends by your locker, gushing about how one of your friends got a date for the prom coming up. She could see you smiling, happy for your friend while shaking your head when asked if you already had a date. It was rather surprising that you didn't’ have one yet, you were one of the most popular kids in the school. MJ was sure the guys were basically throwing themselves at you. Unlike most of the annoying people who she had to endure eight hours for five days a week, you were actually pretty cool. The “popularity” hadn’t gotten to your head, yet anyway.

“Stop drooling, you look a little creepy”, Peter Parker slid beside her, bumping into the locker next to MJs. He literally was wearing one of those shoes with rollers on the bottom.

MJ rolled her eyes at him and closed her locker after taking out the necessary books. She briefly wiped the corner of her mouth with her sleeve to make sure she wasn’t actually drooling.

Peter glanced at Y/N who was with her friends and wiggled his eyebrows.

“She doesn’t have a date yet”, he nudged MJ.

“I know”, she answered, annoyed where this conversation was headed already. “Why do you even care?” Her eyebrows furrowed together.

You said goodbyes to your friends and decided to head towards your chem class, passing MJ and Peter. She awkwardly smiled when you greeted her briefly and continued on with your way. MJ looked at Peter warningly when he turned back to her with a smug look.

“MJ’s got a crush--”

“I will hit you with a chair”, MJ said pointedly just as the class bell rang. Peter chuckled at his own sing-song joke, resting his hands on the straps of his back bag.

”Just ask her out man”, he said, looking up at her. ”What’s the worst that could happen?"

”Uh, first of all, you don't get to have any say in this”, MJ mused out loud, knowing just how dead and miserable Parker’s love life was and how he channeled it through other people's business. ”Second, I don’t even care.”

”Pfft, sure”, Peter mumbled, scratching the back of his neck while following her to class.

You were sitting in the cafeteria, talking with few friends of yours about the upcoming algebra exam when Peter Parker slid into your conversation. He plopped down beside you, scaring the life out of you.

”Hi”, you smiled confusedly. You weren’t quite sure what he wanted from you as you weren't too familiar, but his awkwardness was adorable. It made your friends giggle a little.

”Uh, hi okay so a quick survey”, Peter began making random patterns on the table while talking. ”If there happened to be an intelligent girl--woman! An intelligent woman, who's also rather cute but won't admit to anyone because the patriarchy sucks and we all eventually die and happened to also like dogs”, he nodded towards your phone where your cousin’s dog was as your lock screen.

”Like what would be her chances... with you?” He squinted his eyes at you, while yours were wide open.

”Peter, are you talking about MJ?” You freaked a little. You had no idea she might have liked you, you thought you always looked too girly and one of those bimbos in her eyes. Plus you always were so awkward when talking with her. Well, those rare times you got to talk with her. Like that one time the last December before Christmas break, you had complained about the homework in the bathroom while she had stayed mostly quiet.

Peter’s eyes went wide and his mouth opened and closed rapidly like he was a fish. ”I—uh, no! No, not MJ, definitely not—”

”Peter, it’s fine”, You chuckled, still a little overwhelmed by the new found information. Your friends nudged you teasingly, you just shook your head at them. ”I... I kinda like her too. If she likes me, that is.”

”She does!” Peter caught himself saying a bit too loud and he immediately lowered his voice. You bit your lip from excitement. ”I mean, she does... she’s just really bad at talking with people, who's not me.”

”You could see her after school”, one of your friends proposed. You looked at them in thought.

”We have cheer exercise though.”

”After that, behind the bleachers”, your other friend offered. ”I mean that’s where everyone makes out so you’d totally have all the privacy.” The thought made your cheeks heat up a quite bit.

You rolled your lips together in thought before nodding and turning to Peter. ”Can I have her phone number?” The boy scrambled through his pockets to get his phone, nodding feverishly at the same time.

”Hey it’s Y/N, can you see me after school by the bleachers?”

MJ had been pretty sure she had accidentally inhaled something poisonous in chem class when she got the message from you. And When MJ asked Peter how you had even gotten her number, he just shrugged his shoulders the tips of his ears bright red.

”I swear to god if you said anything stupid—”

”I don’t know what you’re talking about, I have to go, Aunt May’s waiting bye!” Peter word vomited after their last class and darted out of the room, leaving MJ deal with the mess by herself. She put the hood over her head and read your text again, not sure what to say so she ended up answering okay.

She grimaced a little how blunt it sounded.

Outside was warm, the summer was quickly approaching with the help of climate change. MJ didn't necessarily dislike the heat, in the summer, she just didn't like the fact that she couldn't seek comfort from her hoodies and long-sleeved clothing anymore.

She had almost forgotten how nervous she was until she saw you, already in your cheer uniform, hair out of your face. You had this gleeful grin on your face you usually had when the cafeteria had your favorite lunch or when you were talking about your weekend plans with your friends. And now it was directed to her!

MJ awkwardly brushed the hair strand in front of her face, glancing around if anyone was at the field yet to see you two. There wasn't anyone.

”Hi”, you breathed out. MJ felt her heart hammer in her chest. She felt like if she opened her mouth to speak she’d accidentally blurt out everything she was thinking.

”So”, you continued when MJ stayed silent, standing there with her hands fiddling by her sides. ”Peter gave me your number”, you began, chuckling when MJ rolled her eyes a little. She made a mental note to sack that loser... or maybe thank him, depending on what this was about.

“Are you going, to the dance?” She asked, wanting to fill the awkward silence. You were a little taken aback by the sudden question, smiling a little baffled.

“Uh, no”, you shook your head. MJ raised her eyebrows a little surprised. She was sure out of everyone you’d go. You probably had a line of guys ready to take you out from the drop of the hat.

“I don’t really like big crowds”, you admitted sheepishly. “And you?”

MJ had been staring at your lips for a second. “Oh, no—I don’t—“ she began stuttering and falling over her words. You nodded understanding her nonetheless. Meanwhile, MJ was cursing herself inside her head for suddenly turning into such a toddler.

“I was thinking”, you began, eyes darting all around you two, too nervous to look at MJ. “And you can totally say no, but like... there’s this apocalypse movie coming up. Well, the first show is on the dance night to be exact and I thought if you’d like to go and see it? With... me..?” You dared to look up at MJ, whose mouth was hanging a little bit open. Normally you would have joked about it, had you not been feeling like throwing up your lunch from the agonizing nervousness.

”I uh—” stupid brain, for once work! MJ stuttered, looking at you like a deer in the headlights because there was no chance that she was being asked out right now? By you of all people. How did people usually react to this? Like, do they nod? Say just yes? Yes seems too plain and stupid.

”Does—does insects have chemoreceptors for taste on their legs?” She clicked her fingers into the universal finger gun motion, awkwardly bouncing on her heels. You furrowed your eyebrows a little in confusion.

”Yes?” You had no idea, but you sure hoped it was the right answer.

”Yeah! Yeah, they do. It’s—It’s actually the hairs... on-on the legs...” MJ kicked herself mentally from the ramble not realizing how adorable you found it to be. She scratched her neck, glancing up into the sky. What would be the odds of lightning striking down st her right now?

”Well, I have to go to practice”, you said, your voice accompanied by a disappointed sigh. ”But I’ll text you after. "Is that... cool?” you awkwardly offered, trying to stop the grin spreading too wide on your face and scaring the girl away.

MJ nodded, barely managing to speak before you already had to go to the field. She watched as you jogged away, hands in her hoodie pockets. Once she was sure she was alone she punched the air slightly.

"Yes", she exclaimed under her breath before turning around to walk back to the school bulding. At least she now had something to think about during her detention.

#mj x reader #mj x you #zendaya

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foresthearth · 4 years

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Review: “Witch”, by Lisa Lister

Coming in three years after publication, ‘cause that’s how I roll.

Okay, I have to mention, I HATE these matte covers that pick up fingerprints like you wouldn’t believe. Ugh. Why do this to me and my greasy little hands?!

Moving on.

TL;DR: If you are a cisgender, AFAB woman with a fully functioning reproductive system, who finds this fact to be intrinsic to your parsing of femininity and spirituality, this book will probs be great for you.

Everyone else? This book is bad. Yes, there is some nuance to this and the WHY of its badness (and all reviews are subject to reviewer bias), but overall, in summation? It’s bad.

To start off, the kinda dubious but overall not so bad: it doesn’t really tell you anything. It bills itself as sort of a cultural studies text crossed with an intro to witchcraft; however, for me, it fails at both. As a textbook, it does not cite sources, though there is a “Bookshelf” section at the end – the text itself, however, really just serves as a place for Lister to talk about her perceptions of the female and feminine power throughout history. Which in and of itself is FINE, but don’t say you’re going to explain “the history behind witchcraft” (literally in the back cover blurb) and not actually back that history up with sources. You can talk all you want about persecution of women, but when putting it in a specific context such as the age of witch trials, or referring to societies that used to venerate women before the patriarchy took hold, it really helps to have some primary or secondary source to back up what you’re saying. You may think that we’re all drawing from a common knowledge, but not everyone has access to that knowledge pool, nor has the same background and learning. Just back up what you’re saying, or even just reference further reading that people can do if they want to learn more about what you’re pulling from. (I compare this to one of my books on Queer Magic – it also doesn’t have a bibliography, but that is due to the fact that it IS primary source material, essays from queer folks on *their magic*. Witch is not trying to be a primary source, therefore Lister should really acknowledge where she’s found her information.)

Now, the intro to witchcraft bit. Personally, none of the spells resonated with me – except for the Ostara honeycakes recipe because they are delicious – but that has more to do with how I practise magic. Lister’s practise and mine are very different, and her formalised spells/rituals do absolutely nothing for me. BUT if you are new to witchcraft, and looking for step-by-step guidance for certain issues, or rituals for a sabbat, these could be helpful, or at least give a jumping off point. However, it’s useful to keep in mind that this is not following any specific path within witchcraft – so if you are starting out and want to learn something formalised, this isn’t the book for it. Which is why I say it fails as being an intro to witchcraft: it’s showing you a few spells with no background into the wherefore, no reasoning as to what gives these things the power for this spell. And I feel like that’s because Lister isn’t trying for a tradition-based book, in that she herself works intuitively. So the spellcraft doesn’t really work for me, and I feel like it doesn’t give a firm enough foundation to be considered an introductory book. That being said, it does give just enough information to pique curiosity, so that you may have an idea of where to start further research.

There is one aspect of Witch that I do find pretty good, which is the constant reiteration of finding your own power and believing yourself and trusting your intuition. This is what I think is the strong point of the book overall – Lister says it’s to help women “reclaim the word ‘witch’”, but witchcraft aside, I definitely feel it’s got some good points about not letting yourself be silenced, and moving into trusting yourself and your ways of knowing.

BUT.

There is a MAJOR issue that I have with this book, and that is the transphobia and gender essentialism. And this is what, for me, makes it a bad book.

Let me quote a bit for you, from right near the beginning:

“Yet, as I was pulling my pages and pages of handwritten notes… I felt an overwhelming need to apologize for writing a book specifically about women as witches… I’ll piss off the transgender community for not addressing them… That thought? That need to apologize? That’s the very reason why I HAVE to write this book. What I share is NOT intended to exclude others. But trying to be all-inclusive would totally miss the point.” (Witch, pp. xvii-xviii)

Sigh. If you’re going into something with the feeling that you’re being exclusive and need to apologize, maybe that’s a sign to take a step back and look at who you’re excluding and why. If, to you, “the essence of a witch is someone who trusts their inner authority and uses their own personal magic to navigate and negotiate the environment they currently find themselves in” (ibid. p. xix), then why the need to specifically mention that witches power comes from their womb? Why keep bringing it back to “pussy power” and tying everything back to menstrual cycles? Why? And maybe – MAYBE – if there had only been this passing reference in the intro, it could be overlooked. But the references to pussy power, to wombs, tying power to biology, is constant throughout the book:

“Blessed be my womb for being the holy grail, cauldron and keeper of the mysteries.” (p. xxii)

“One sister is chanting the various names given to the Mother God: ‘Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Innana’ over and over, from deep down in her womb. (p. xxiii)

“There were no fanfares, marching bands or big applause: just pussy-deep truth.” (p. 3)

“You can only find your power when you plug yourself back into the motherboard. When your feet touch Mumma Earth, and your womb and heart connect with her.” (p. 16)

“Generations of women have been disconnected from the power that lies between their thighs – their lady landscape, their womb and their menstrual cycle. They’ve lost connection with their ability to create life (and everything else) in their wombs, which means their minds can be easily manipulated and indoctrinated by Patriarchy.” (p. 75)

I could go on, but believe me when I say this is pervasive throughout the entire book.

You can’t have it both ways. You cannot give an inclusive definition of what you think a witch is, and then go on to say ‘oh, but you’re only a witch if you have this biological aspect’ and venerate that biological aspect in an exclusionary way. This book is either only for AFAB, cis women with fully working parts, or it’s for everyone.

I am a queer, cisgender woman with pretty severe endocrine issues which have basically fucked my reproductive system. The amount of time that Lister spends in this book, talking about how our feminine power comes from this same reproductive system is absolutely distasteful, as well as being reductive and exclusionary. I’ve spent enough of my life feeling useless and not enough, due to my physical issues, that I really don’t need a book about reclaiming my feminine power to ALSO say that my feminine power is rooted in a fundamentally broken part of my body. Yes, the menstrual cycle/organs are powerful and have strong magic, but they are NOT what makes someone a woman. To say that it is not only excludes those who either don’t have or have ill-functioning systems, as well as reducing women to nothing more than their reproductive systems… And isn’t that what Lister’s trying to get away from, what with reclaiming feminine power and blasting the patriarchy?

And if I feel this way? I cannot even imagine what my trans family would feel like, expecting a book on witchcraft and the feminine, only to be told mid-text, that they’re not valid or wanted.

I’m not saying that you can’t write a book about the power inherent in the reproductive systems. But just be sure to make it very clear that that’s what you’re doing. Don’t play coy and hide your TERF views in the text, put them on the cover so we don’t pay money for exclusionary bullshit.

And for further reading:

https://www.oxfordreference.com/view/10.1093/oi/authority.20110803095846595

https://medium.com/@pennyred/terf-wars-why-transphobia-has-no-place-in-feminism-60d3156ad06e

https://www.patheos.com/blogs/pantheon/2011/03/transgender-issues-in-pagan-religions/

https://godsandradicals.org/2016/02/10/its-all-about-sex-feminism-paganism-and-trans-exclusion/

https://www.hercampus.com/school/york-u/women-wicca-transphobia-and-other-issues

#witch #witchblr #book review #cw: transphobia #cw: gender essentialism

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liquormixintellect-blog · 5 years

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Dusk til Dawn

Pairing: Harry x Reader

FRAT! HARRY HERE TO GIVE YOU EVERYTHING YOU EVER NEEDED AND MORE. I’ve been really excited about starting this and I’m going to try to have chapter 2 up by Sunday if this is well received!!! Also I added a teensy weensy bit of smut! Enjooooy <3 I would love feedback

Chapter 1

You knew you were that bitch. There wasn’t a more simple way to put it. You were confident in your inner as well as physical beauty, and you knew that’s what people found most intriguing about you. The way you could command attention whenever you pleased but you managed to obtain humility in the process. There was a lot of guys and girls willing to challenge that.

As your junior year of college was in full swing, parties became a daily occurrence. With the fraternities and sororities at the forefront of those events.

So when you walked into your 9am that morning, you weren’t surprised to hear that’s what the entire class was discussing. You tiptoed through the crowded rows of seats, normally you would arrive a tad bit early to avoid maneuvering through people but that extra ten minutes of sleep did something to amazing to your soul. Your best friend was gnawing on the base of her mechanical pencil the moment you sat down. You weren’t the type to necessarily have a friend that was closer to you than every one else but Denver was different. She was really easy to speak to and always always had your best interest. You two had been put in the same dorm freshman year and when you found out she had the exact same major as you, it only further sealed the deal.

“So, are you going to the party tonight?” Denver wasn’t making eye contact. Instead she was facing straight forward as if she was listening to the instructor to avoid being called out for talking. You took the moment to actually evaluate your best friend.

Denver was adopted. For a long time she struggled with her physical self due to attempting to conform to european beauty standards, but you took pride in helping her truly love herself and her culture. How could she hate something so unique and original?

She had extremely thick and long black hair that she kept tied into a high ponytail. Only a few stray pieces were kept out to adorn her face. Her skin reminded you of cocoa with just a few tablespoons of milk mixed in to create a dewy brown. She was beautiful. And you may or may not have had a intimate experience sophomore year when a thunderstorm cut off all of electricity on campus, but that was a different story for a different day.

“I don’t think so D! I feel like I’ve grown out of them. Aren’t they all the same at this point?” You were speaking while simultaneously jotting down notes. Unbeknownst to you, a certain curly haired frat boy was behind you eaves dropping.

“Oh no lovie. This one is going to be different.” You and Denver turn around to meet a pair of emerald eyes under arched brows.

“Lovie? Harry you’ve been throwing the same lame ass parties year after year.” Denver muffles her chuckle at your comeback.

“Then why do you make an appearance year after year?” You rolled your eyes and adjusted yourself to where you were facing forward again.

He was right. You did make an appearance frequently but what else were you supposed to do when everyone who was worth spending time with was at these said events? And where else would you find people to hook up with? And what if you were looking for a certain somebody to hook up with?

The rest of the class period was spent in silence, and you were kind of grateful for it. You actually enjoyed your major and everything about it only further intrigued her.

“All right. We’ve got an exam coming up at the end of next week so please stay on top of your notes and online assignments. You all are dismissed.” It didn’t even take a second for the sound of backpacks zipping to overwhelm the room.

Denver is right behind you as you make a beeline for the door.

“Ms. Y/L/N? May I speak to you for a moment?” Your professor hasn’t looked up from his desk as he speaks to you. Denver gives you a sympathetic look.

“I’ll wait for you in the hallway girl.” You nod.

Harry brushes past you intentionally nudging your shoulder.

“Oooh! Someone’s in trouble!” He throws his head back to laugh.

You didn’t know if you wanted to suck his dick or kick his ass in that moment.

Your standing in front of your professor awaiting his response.

“I’m so pleased with your work this semester young lady! You’re on track to make the highest overall grade I’ve ever given. If you’re able to keep that up, I’d love to get you into a summer internship program that could possibly guarantee you a job after graduation. How does that sound?”

You can feel each beat your heart makes.

thump thump. thump thump.

Fuck! Was this actually happening? Was all of your hard work paying off?

“Oh my god! YES! You have no idea how much this means to me professor peterson.” You’re so eager to relay the news to Denver that you take off before saying goodbye, only to make a quick ball change and jog back in to bid farewell.

As you catch back up to Denver, your brain is moving far quicker and your mouth can’t quite keep up.

“ohmygoddenverhesaidimbasicallyageniusandhesgonnagetmeajobandohmygoodnessthisiseverythingiveeverwantedandmore!” Your chest is rising and falling at a quick pace. Denver is uncontrollably giggling.

“That’s great babe! I’m so excited for you.” She pulls you into a tight hug. Denver then wraps her left arm around your shoulder while utilizing her right hand to create a nonexistent rainbow.

“Everything is up from here Y/N. I feel it in my hooha.”

You both break out in an uncontrollable laughter and you take her arm in yours hooking at the elbow.

“How I’d love to see the two of you like that. With no clothes. In my room.”

The speed at which the both of your heads whip around must’ve surpassed a world record.

Your met with harry and his best friend Benji.

“Ew. Did your cis gendered ass just sexualize a relationship that, by the way, is completely platonic between two women to fit whatever sick fucking fantasy is in your head!?” Denver growls in disgust.

Freshman year of college introduced you and Denver to a new way of woman’s empowerment and you haven’t been the same since.

“Don’t mind Benji, he thinks with his dick too much. Will we be seeing you two tonight?” You both exchange looks before simultaneously giving a stern no.

You both whip back around and continue walking.

Harry puts on a quick jog to catch up.

“Seriously!? I would love to see you both there, we all know you’re the life of the party.” Harry’s grin makes a slight curve revealing both of his dimples along with his adorable bunny teeth. His eyes are gleaming today and his eyelashes delicately flutter everytime he blinks.

Oh god. Were you daydreaming about Harry?

“Okay fine, we’ll go.” You huff a bit before shifting your attention to Denver who looks nothing short of annoyed.

“Great! I’ll see you both there, and cheer up Denver. You never know what can happen on a night of fun!” He gives you both a quick wink before he confidently strolls away.

“Y/N! Did you seriously just fall victim to the patriarchy? We’re better than this. Did you see the way Benji undressed us with his eyes?” Denver’s shaking her head.

“It’ll be fun girl. We can get dressed really sexy and do eachother’s makeup!”

Well. Denver would be doing majority of the work, you weren’t particularly skilled in the beauty department besides a basic everyday look.

*****

“Quit blinking Y/N!” Denver’s got her hands wrapped around your head at this point.

“You want me to stop blinking yet you’re about to poke my eye out?” Denver finished applying a touch of white eyeliner to your bottom lash line to give you a more awake and vibrant look. Your anxiety is causing your knees to bounce up and down. Were you really this nervous for a guy?

“Girl what are you so jittery for?” Denver cackles. You hadn’t been completely honest with your best friend but how could you be when you weren’t completely honest to yourself? Maybe. Just maybe you were excited to see harry tonight.

“Oh, nothing. It’s a habit. Should we get dressed now?” Your weak attempt at changing the subject doesn’t go unnoticed to Denver.

You quickly shoot up from her vanity and head to her closet. You two always shared clothes especially when it was time to make an appearance. Denver was usually the type to spend the extra dime on her apparel as well so you knew she was stocked with goodies. You settle on a navy and floral slip dress that leaves little to the imagination.

Accentuating your chest with a single pearl pendant.

You decide to dress it down with a pair of white trainers.

Your gazing at yourself in the floor length mirror before shifting your attention Denver. Who decided to take a different route with a utility style skirt that just brushed past her bum as well as a sheer white button up blouse with a bralette peaking through.

You did say you knew you were that bitch, it’s only right your best friend is as well.

Fluffing your hair one last time until it settles in it’s natural state, you grab your wristlet and head out with Denver.

****

The bass of the music is vibrating the floors, so much that you almost mistook it for an earthquake. There’s so many things happening at once that you’re not quite sure where to focus your energy.

A group of guys on one half of the large frat house are playing a serious game of beer pong with profanities strung left and right. A group of what you presume are freshman girls are huddled watching those same boys secretly hoping to be chosen.

You take a mental sigh. Your thoughts are interrupted by Denver rapidly back handing your upper arm.

You look at her face and follow her eyesight. Your eyes meet Harry who’s sat next to a gentleman you’ve never seen before. His hair is perfect styled with one single strand dropped to dangle just in front of his eye.

“Y/N, who the fuck is that!” Your giggling at Denver’s forwardness. Before you know it, she’s grabbed your arm and drags you over to Harry and his new friend.

“Hey Harry. Who’s your friend?” She was straight the point, wasn’t she?

“I admire your confidence.”

Okay. So new guy was a bit more confident than we anticipated.

“I have a few other things you could admire.” She takes a slow wet lick across her bottom lip before tucking her it into her mouth.

“Okaaay.. Let’s not do this right here.” You could cut their sexual tension with a knife.

New guy stands up before properly adjusting his clothing. He extends his hand towards Denver.

“Zayn.”

“Denver.”

Denver was bold.

They’re staring intently.

“Did you want to grab a drink?” Zayn then tops Denver’s boldness by tucking a loose strand behind her ear to get a better view of her beauty.

“I’d like that.” You just know she’s losing her shit inside.

Denver gives you a wink which makes Zayn take a breathy laugh before escorting her to the kitchen.

You shift your weight to the opposite leg and adjusts your posture.

“I knew she’d like him.” Harry takes a sip out of his red solo cup.

“So you planned this?” Your left eyebrow is raised, slightly amused by his effort.

“How else was I going to get you alone tonight?” He takes a step closer to you, his cologne of choice invades your senses. Making you feel a million things at once.

“Harry....” before you can continue, the entire house erupts in cheers. Harry puts his hand on the small of your back to guide you towards the ruckus.

“Harry, mate! You’ve gotta join us.” Benji takes Harry into a headlock and guides him further in leaving you to stand amongst the crowd. You cross your arms across your chest, annoyed that your private moment was interrupted.

“Give me a second lovie.” There goes that stupid pet name, the pet name that makes your heart skip a beat every single time he calls you it.

The beer pong game that you once observed beforehand had escalated. With everyone in the house focusing their attention on the table. Benji and Harry were on one side with another two of their frat brothers on the other.

“You can’t randomly add Harry in! That’s cheating!” The two boys are making a fuss.

“I almost single handedly kicked both of your asses. I do what I please!” Benji counters.

There’s one last cup on the opposite side of the table, Harry must come in clutch during situations like these.

He raises his wrist and adjusts it just right with one eye closed to evenly line himself up. With one slight flick of the wrist, a small drop is heard signaling his success. The crowd erupts into an even louder cheer causing Harry to smile as wide as possible. He was in his element.

“I never knew you had so much finesse.” You say as Harry sways towards you.

Your both settled into the corner you initially started in, with a round of shots accompanying you.

You throw one back and make a face of sheer disgust. Harry can’t help but lose himself over your reaction.

“Not funny. That was disgusting!”

“Well lovie, we’ve got a couple more to go so you betta get used to it.”

He splits the shots between you two equally and you decide the best decision would be to quickly throw yours back and get it over with. Or so you thought.

“So how do you know Zayn?” You break the silence between you two and you’re pretty sure you can feel your shots catching up to you.

“We were best mates before college, but we drifted a bit after attending separate institutions. I found out he was transferring and I was excited as hell. We could start hanging out again like we used to. It was just hunch that told me Denver would go crazy over him.” He’s sipping his wine cooler while laughing and shaking his head at his own success.

You knew what he was saying but you weren’t exactly processing it. You’re lost in his emerald irises. The tequila was getting the absolute best of you that not even Harry was expecting what you were planning to do next.

He looks at you awaiting some sort of rebuttal.

You take both of your hands and cup his cheeks pulling him in for a sweet yet tender kiss.

Harry doesn’t budge, instead he begins to work his lips against yours giving your ass a gentle squeeze.

You pull back and take a deep breath.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time.”

Harry takes his lips between his fingers as if he was savoring the moment. He takes your hand in his and guides you up the long staircase into an even longer hallway with multiple bedrooms. The first one on the left is his.

He pulls you in and shuts the door with your body against it. His lips are moving at a different pace, almost like a sense of urgency. Like he’s been dying for this moment to come. He hikes your dress up and wraps one of your legs around his waist.

Somewhere in the timeline of you knowing him, he must’ve picked up that you were on the aggressive side in bed, enjoying every dominant move he made.

“Fuuck Y/N.” His voice is hoarse as he works his way from your lobe down to your collarbone with sloppy and wet kisses. His member is growing rapidly.

His actions are only leaving you craving more. Harry moves your panties to the side to garner access. He pulls down his jeans and boxers. He then uses his tip to tease at your entrance. A hiss leaving his lips.

“H-Harry.. I want you.”

That was all he needed.

He slips into you with ease, picking a pace that’s quick and has your back slamming against the door. All you can do is scream at the pure euphoria not caring who in this house heard you.

“HARRY!” You’re screaming his name repeatedly, he adjusts his hips to hit your sweet spot. He grabs your face and forces you to look into his eyes. His brows furrowed, beads of sweat dripping down his temple. A side of him you’ve never seen, but a side that you want more of.

It doesn’t take much for you to both reach your highs, riding them out simultaneously.

He properly sets you down adjusting your dress for you.

“Please don’t tell Denver.” That’s all Harry hears from you before you scurry out of the door.

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles smut #harry styles blurb #harry styles fan fic #one direction imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles preferences #harry styles writing #zayn #zayn malik #zayn malik imagine #zayn malik fan fic #zayn malik fluff #zayn malik angst

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janeaustentextposts · 7 years

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Have you read/seen The Jane Austen Book Club? I read it for school and I really quite enjoyed it, but when I went back to, like, analyze it I realised I didn't remember any of the plot, and mostly what I remembered was just reading other people's interpretations of Austen (which is also why I read this blog, lol). So have you read this particular Austen-inspired story, and if so, what did you think of it? Also, if I enjoyed it what else should I try, Lost in Austen or Austenland or...?

I’ve seen the film, but not read the book. (Likewise for Austenland.) The two films and the miniseries all comment to a certain degree on the culture of reading and adapting and appreciating Austen, but all in very different ways, so it depends on what you’re looking for. (Spoilers below!)

The Jane Austen Book Club (at least in the film,) has some jokes about Austen, but is very much rooted in the real world and ultimately an ensemble dramedy which weaves allusions to Austen’s characters and narrative into the personal lives of each of the individuals involved in this titular book club as a means of bringing very different people into contact with one another and providing a common-ish thread to connect them and their experiences.

But as this is arguably a more conventional ensemble piece there’s much more to compare when looking at Austenland and Lost in Austen: a woman, dissatisfied with modern living, indulges in escapism with varying degrees of extreme immersion in the world of the Regency and her encounters there prompt her to examine the direction she wants her own life to take in true heroine style. Ends up smooching a reticent and conventionally-attractive white man which indicates she has found fulfillment, at last.

Lost in Austen runs more along the lines of magic-realism and trends towards the humour in its situational conflicts rather than trying to justify plot-twists and character-choices. Love conquers all in the end, I suppose, but for myself I wasn’t able to entirely applaud the end of Amanda’s arc, because to me it felt hollow. My suspension of disbelief didn’t go far enough to allow me to feel it was right or good that Amanda would give up everything in her ‘old’ life for the Great Love she’s always idealized in literature. It all feels too good to be true, and I feel like a reasonable woman would question that...and possibly her sanity, given the meta-commentary on the blending of ‘fictional’ history and modern ‘reality’. I know there isn’t enough time to explain how or why any of this is happening, and so it’s all handwaved and people just accept it and move forward with the hijinks and fun, which...okay. It’s a lark. A merry romp through literature.

But then...Amanda decides to stay. I don’t know what she’s leaving behind--of course we’re shown that she isn’t satisfied with her job and her friends and romantic interests don’t respect her in the way she wants to be respected. But does she have any family? Any friends besides her roommate who is implied to be kind of a shitty person because she’s just enjoying life in her own way and not out to find a Rich Man and Settle Down? The thing about shitty jobs and friends and boyfriends is...you can leave them. You can find something new. And as this blog rather proves, there are plenty of folks to bond with over Jane Austen, if that’s what’ll fill the gaping hole in your life.

So, okay, Amanda’s all-time fave happens to fall for her and it’s amazing and her weird-ass dream about a fictional man is coming true. So...she decides she wants to ride this train for however long she can and just...be Mrs. Darcy? Mr. Darcy seems nice and all, and I’ve never been in love enough to want to marry somebody so maybe I don’t know shit, but my cynical inner monologue would have zero chill at the prospect of living permanently in a time with no suffrage or antibiotics. Even if one would be living at Pemberley and married to Mr. Darcy. With no birth control. Or germ theory. Amanda’s in control of her hair--great--what about her uterus? Lost in Austen, in the end, leans a little too heavily on the necessary suspension of disbelief in all this and just ends up snapping me back into an uncomfortable place with a lot of questions as to why they feel True Love is all an ending needs to justify it. Perhaps I’m expecting too much of a four-parter that wants to skew rom-com-fantasy rather than question the conflicts between the position of women in the past and the present as well as examining the romantic glorification of era which, despite their Aesthetic, were deeply entrenched in patriarchy and a toxic class system.

I know I’m over-thinking it, and there were things I definitely enjoyed about Lost in Austen once I just...let all that shit go; but there’s also a reason I haven’t felt the need to go back and watch it again and again.

Austenland kind of falls somewhere between the other two, I find. There’s no attempt to drag things into a complicated morass of Which Reality is Superior if Indeed Both Even Truly Exist--it’s like Lost in Austen got given a grounding which helped to take the pressure off justifying anything and just let the fun bits happen without sweating too much over how. Of course there’s an Austenized recreational hotel experience somewhat in the style of those murder mystery parties where everyone takes on a character to play. Of course there is. Done. Moving on. The comedy of a modern woman pining for The Gracious Past is allowed to unspool when she gets the chance to Live It (albeit in a comedic, ever-so-slightly-wrong way that totally feels plastic and even a bit cheap, but that’s part of the fun--during the first dinner scene just pause it on the wide shots and take a look at the prop food on the table, it’s a SCREAM,) and through this discovers that what she had idealized was not all she had cracked it up to be, in her mind, but that the stuff she still truly loves about it aren’t things that are lost to her, in the modern day. The character of Jane has this growth arc where she stops trying to fill her dissatisfaction with her life with fictional ideals, and forces her to really consider what she wants and to go after it. It’s bittersweet, because we know what all the Austen stuff means to her. It’s hard to put away those dreams, but she knows it’ll be worthwhile. And she has the support-network which Amanda lacks--her friend is, again, bemused by her Austen obsession, but ultimately supportive. Jane has to deal with gross modern dudes, but then...there are gross dudes in the ‘past’, too. Gross dudes are everywhere, is my point.

So Amanda and Jane both find the romantic wish-fulfillment they’re looking for, in the end; but apart from the messiness of Lost in Austen’s blurry stance on what the fuck is going on with spacetime and fiction, exactly, Jane has an arc, which Amanda does not. Things happen to Amanda. I remember watching and being entirely shocked when Darcy declares his love for her...maybe this is supposed to be a shock twist much like Darcy’s proposal to Amanda is a shock twist, because he’s supposed to loathe her for her weird ways like he supposedly loathed Lizzy for her low connections and ridiculous family...but here’s the thing...Amanda Price is not Elizabeth Bennet. It’s like all the writers took away from the dynamic was that Darcy loved Elizabeth because she was Different, and therefore Any Different Girl Will Do. Which...eeeeeeeh, no. Not exactly.

Darcy’s tortured avowal of his love feels like a Thing That is Happening to Amanda, not something which is occurring naturally due to clear signs of accord between Darcy and Amanda’s characters. Even Austen gives us some hints from almost the beginning of their acquaintance that Darcy wasn’t entirely cold towards Elizabeth--but Elizabeth certainly perceived him to be so. His proposal is a surprise to HER, but not to us as readers. When the plot-twist of Darcy’s feelings for Amanda are as much a shock to the audience as they are to the protagonist it’s...kind of cheap and out of left-field. It’s a bold move to try and write an original character who is literally there to take the place of Elizabeth Bennet, so Lost in Austen hasn’t made things easy for themselves by any means by dropping their girl in the midst of these iconic characters and situations, and I guess I applaud them for trying, but...eeeeeh, no.

Amanda is trying to be everything and nothing. She’s the Everywoman the audience can project itself onto, and so she has very few defining character traits to help her drive her own story. She’s an exercise in meta, which is fun and has its positives, but doesn’t result in a cohesive and compelling narrative arc anywhere near to the original Elizabeth Bennet’s. Amanda Price is the Bella Swan of an Austen fanfic come to life. Jane of Austenland is...well, very much like that, too, only she spends more time grappling with questions about what she’s looking for in her life and why, rather than “lol Darcy is casually racist on a London bus” (I appreciate that they tried to address that, except they didn’t address it so much as make a YIKES face and move on.) Lost in Austen becomes a pile of gimmicks and meta-moments with one woman along for the ride and romantic reward at the end rather than Austenland’s woman who is in a more toned-down variation of the same situation confronting the unsatisfying stasis of her adult life and realizing she’ll have to make some proactive choices, including leaving behind unhelpful aspects of her idealism and escapist fantasies in order to forge something with deeper meaning for herself.

Basically, sure, there’s things to enjoy in Lost in Austen and Austenland; but for my money, Austenland is the worthier and more well-executed story, especially when compared against similar elements in Lost in Austen, where the pursuit of meta-jokes overwhelms any attempt to actually give us characters to care about in a world which is too eager to dismiss realistic concerns and issues.

#Ask Me Anything Austen-Adjacent #AMAAA #Lost in Austen #Austenland #Jane Austen #Anonymous

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nicosroom · 7 years

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Nico’s “52 list”

The aim of the 52 list are to set down a “to-do” list of sorts in order that

I don’t get overwhelmed by everything I’ve ever wanted to do (and therefore never do anything);

and to weed out things I don’t actually want to do with my life (as in, if I don’t do it at the end of 2017, I have to decide if I want to put it on next year’s list or just admit I’ll never do it).

Here it goes--

1. Learn to poach eggs - perfecting them is an ongoing process, but I have the basic technique down; follow the saga on Twitter

2. No sugar in smoothies or oatmeal for two weeks - January 23-February 5. My plan is to maintain sugar free smoothies, but some oatmeal just needs sugar, okay?

3. Practice blow drying my own hair approximately once per week. Despite how little I do it, I really do enjoy wearing my hair straight once in a while. Typically, I have it dried straight at the salon after a haircut. I’m far too clumsy and impatient to do it myself. But, this year, I want to practice so that just maybe I can do more things with my hair than letting it air dry and throwing it up in a bun when I get tired of it falling in my face.

4. Try Penzeys Spices. It was everything.

5. Day trip to Yellow Springs, OH.

6. Visit Old Schoolhouse Winery in Eaton, OH.

7. Visit Hanover Winery in Hamilton, OH. It may be the best kept secret in Butler County.

8. Buy an immersion blender at the KitchenAid summer sale. I bought an immersion blender and then some.

9. Use sumac in a recipe. Almost two years ago, Catherine and I were cooking from Ottelenghi’s Jerusalem cookbook for my shoddily run cookbook club. It seemed like a ton of the recipes called for sumac. After a couple attempts, Catherine finally located it at the international market and she gave me ziploc snack-bag filled with sumac. Have I used sumac one single time since she gave this to me? No. This has to change in 2017. It took a while, but I have now.

10. Save $15 per week. Is it cheating if I automated this?

11. Buy a membership at the Cincinnati Art Museum. Student memberships are $30 per year. That’s like the smallest fraction of my discretionary spending budget that I could ever imagine.

12. Make cannellini bean and lamb stew from Jerusalem. Check it out. I’ve been cooking out of this book Spring 2015 and it took me all this time to realize they sell lamb stew meat in very neat packages in the regular meat section at Kroger. This whole time, I keep looking for it at the international market, but they only have fancy lamb cuts that seem overwhelmingly expensive.

13. Take more baths. I recently have been rereading The Bell Jar. Old Esther Greenwood may be kooky, but Plath sure made sure Esther knows a thing or two about taking baths. **This is basically over. I probably took three baths in the month and a half after I made this list. Now, I’ve moved into an apartment that doesn’t even have a tub. Too bad!

CANCELLED 14. Go speed dating. Jen & I did a little research and we found that “Predating” seems to be the only speed dating service in the area. And they separate their groups into “25-35″ and “27-39,″ charge $39 to participate, and hold a session like once a month at a really inconvenient time, like 7 pm on a Tuesday. I’m highly dissuaded. Ladies should be able to speed date for free. The way I see it, reparations for sexism and patriarchy.

14. Make a leche flan from scratch. It’s my very favorite imperial dessert. I devour it at Filipino holiday parties and I always save room for it when I eat out at an American Mexican restaurant. But, I should try to make my own, at least once.

15. Download and create a profile on a dating app. Check out my assessments of Coffee Meets Bagel and Tinder.

16. Watch Blue Hawaii

17. Try some place new for brunch once a month.

January: Sleepy Bee Cafe (Blue Ash (Cincy))

February: technically I failed. I only went out for brunch one time and it was at First Watch. But, at least, I tried a new location? The one in West Chester.

March: Spice Kitchen (Cleveland)

April: Triple header - Holly’s Homemade Eats & Sweets (College Corner, Indiana); Bellevue Bistro (Bellevue, Kentucky); Hang Over Easy (Clifton (Cincy))

May: Sugarcreek Restaurant (Sheffield Village, Oh)

June: Rising Sun Cafe (Yellow Springs, Oh)

July: Treaty City Cafe (Greenville, Oh)

August: another new First Watch location (Secor Rd, Toledo)

September: another new First Watch location (Montgomery, AL)

October: Chik’n Mi (Louisville, KY); Keystone Bar & Grill (Covington, KY location)

November: Doodles (Lexington, KY)

December: Asiana Korean Restaurant (West Chester, OH). I guess this isn’t quite a brunch place, but I ate an delicious eggy beef stew, Yukaejang and we ate there at 11 am, brunch time.

18. Visit downtown Waterville, OH. It’s a small town adjacent to the city of Toledo. I pass through it whenever I drive back and forth to the city from my mom’s new home on the farm. One of these days, maybe I’ll check out the local business scene, the metroparks, and the possibilities.

19. Get a desk that I like and will use. Although people say I have a nice desk, I disagree. I found it near the dumpsters at the apartment complex next door. It does its job, but I don’t love it.

CANCELLED. 20. Complete a Whole 30 reset. Though I remain curious, after much research, I decided that the reset is a terrible idea.

20. Watch Up.

21. Go to a live NFL game. Hopefully not the Bengals…unless they play a really interesting team…or, I can’t afford anything else.

22. Learn hollandaise sauce. Look.

23. Make an eggs benedict dish for breakfast -or lunch/dinner, I suppose. Perhaps a classic with English muffins, but maybe something like a salmon or fried green tomatoes benedict.

24. Make my bed every day for two weeks. I’ve read that this is a habit of highly successful people. I think it would be really good for my “working from home” vs. napping problem.

25. Make a TV-watching schedule. In college, I read some advice that you should schedule when you’ll watch TV and you should only watch TV then. I read that before the days of Netflix instant video. With Netflix, and especially after I moved into my own place, I formed a habit of “watching TV” as background noise while I do any number of things - wash the dishes, cook, fold the laundry, wash my face. As such, I get a lot of stuff done and also take in a lot of pop culture at the same time. But, I also see where this is an extremely counterproductive habit. Such as when I start a new 43 minute episode, but it only takes 20 minutes to wash dishes…and I watch the whole thing…Specifying the TV watching time gives you something to look forward to and provides some space to relax (unlike watching TV while simultaneously doing chores). The schedule should also put an end time on your TV watching. I’m gonna try for an hour Sunday-Thursday, likely between 8-9pm and make Friday and Saturdays open for watching a running list of movies I’ve intended to see. Check out my schedule and what I’m watching!

26. Make roasted pine nut hummus from scratch. Big brand pine nut hummus is so good. But after those hummus recalls by both Sabra and Trader Joe’s, we are in a trust no one situation. I shelled out $24 for a 3lb bag of pine nuts at Costco and I’ll be making my own hummus all year long.

27. Do a cleansing face mask once a week for four weeks.

28. Exfoliate lips once a week for four weeks. Will 27 & 28 stay weekly habits??

29. Color (in my adult coloring book) for 15 minutes before bed, Sunday through Thursday night for two weeks. I started 2017 hoping this could be a nightly habit. A late night here, a phone call with a friend there, a “oh, I forgot to make a lesson plan” on this hand, or a “just-too-tired today” on the other and suddenly I haven’t touched my $22 coloring book in more than two weeks. Alongside some of the above plans and habits on this list, maybe I can do this if I am a little more flexible and realistic. So I’ll shoot for work nights for two solid weeks and see if I can then turn it into a more definite routine.

30. No tech after 10 pm, Sunday through Thursday for one week.

31. Read Ta-Nehisi Coates, “The Case for Reparations” from The Atlantic. You’d think this is easy; it’s an article from The Atlantic, after all. But when I made a PDF of this thing it was 62 pages long. That feels like a short term commitment and I’ve got to put it on the calendar one of these days (after comps).

32. Cook a Julia Child recipe. I made her hollandaise. I like the way she makes one feel empowered to do it, like its the most natural thing in the world. Not like Masterchef, where you’re doomed to fail from the start.

33. Go on a solo weekend trip. Details here.

34. Go to one of those miles long/wide antique malls. I pass by them often on my highway drives around the state and I fantasize about completing my Corelle and Pyrex butterfly gold collections. Somehow the timing is never right - I’m in a hurry, or they’re not open, or whatever excuse I can think up. Some local possibilities: Ohio Valley Antique Mall (Cincinnati’s largest, apparently, in Fairfield), Riverside Antique Mall (over 100 dealers on the scenic Ohio River; Cincinnati), and Heart of Ohio Antiques (according to their website, America’s largest antique destination just an hour away from me in Springfield).

35. Visit Grand Lake St. Mary’s/Celina, OH. I passed by this lake/state park last summer when I drove up US 127 until it connected with US 24. It’s a grueling drive compared with taking the fast-paced highway, but I saw so many tiny towns that might be interesting to visit. Grand Lake St. Mary’s looks like a nice beachy getaway. Though it probably gets busy and touristy in the summers, I bet the weekdays are quiet enough for me to enjoy a day or an overnight here. Perhaps this is a good candidate for that solo weekend trip I noted above.

36. Make tom kha gai. Thai coconut soup with mushrooms (and maybe chicken). So good, so good.

37. Go to IKEA. I was impressed.

38. Go to another distillery on the Kentucky Bourbon Trail. In 2012-13, I went to Four Roses, Wild Turkey, Woodford Reserve, and Maker’s Mark. In 2014, 2015, and 2016 I took trips South in which I drove right through all the places in Kentucky where I might stop off to finish the trail, but I did not stop once - not even for Jim Beam, which is right next to the highway! In 2017, I should go to one, at least. Will I finish the Bourbon Trail or my dissertation first? Stay tuned!

39. Whole 30 Prep: Phase out yogurt for two weeks. I haven’t bought any yogurt since. The question remains, when will I tackle cheese?

40. No alcohol for two weeks.

CANCELLED. 41. Whole 30 Prep: No grains for one week.

41. Go see Fiona the hippo at the Cincinnati Zoo.

CANCELLED 42. No peanut butter, soy, and legumes for two weeks.

42. Go to Miami football and hockey games. I lived in Oxford for 5 years and did neither of these. My only incentive once I move to Cincinnati will be crossing it off this list.

43. Make a meal with a spaghetti squash. I’ve eaten spaghetti squash of course, but I’ve never bothered to roast/dismantle/serve one on my own. This year, I’m finally making that Southwestern Stuffed Spaghetti Squash recipe I pinned about three years ago.

44. Ride the carousel at the Banks in Cincinnati. I tried to do this a couple summers ago, but I showed up 30 minutes after closing time. Time to try again! And some of the carousel characters are pigs!

45. Find red wines that I like. I’m a dry white wine drinker - which puts me in some difficult situations sometimes. Working wine tastings since 2013, I’ve learned some favorites - Raffy Grand Reserve Malbec, Haka Tempranillo, Brion Cabernet. That is, I’ve learned expensive taste. I haven’t stopped working on this, but here are few winners so far.

46. Eat at J. Austin’s. It’s this restaurant I/we pass by every time we drive through Hamilton on the way to somewhere else. One of these days, J.Austin’s should be my/our destination, just to check it out.

47. Get a couch. I’ve managed to live seemingly on my own for five years and never have bothered to get a couch. I was walking around the Salvation Army on April 7 and I impulsively bought a couch.

48. Visit the American Sign Museum - I’ve made it to most of Cincinnati’s museums by now, but not this one. In 2017, it’s time.

49. Visit two new U.S. states - I chatted with a guy in the dating app about his goal of visiting all 50 United States before he turns 50, prompting me to list the states I’ve been to and steal his idea entirely. After eliminating all the states I’ve driven through but had no meaningful interaction with (Mississippi, North Carolina, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Maryland, Virginia) and the ones I don’t remember (like South Carolina, where we lived when I was an infant), I’ve got 21. I was in panic mode - how will I get to 29 states in the next 22.5 years? For the next five or ten years, I think I’ll try to hit at least two a year. In 2017, I have my sights set on Missouri and Arizona. Can anyone recommend some interesting border towns?

Phoenix, AZ trip is booked! Oct. 25-31

50. Have four artist dates. An artist date is a solo date with an artist/artwork. You go by yourself and the point is to just spend time with the artwork without the pressures to talk to other people about it or work on/around their schedules. When you go it alone, the only schedule you have to worry about is yours. Now that I think of it, I should have called “artist date” every time I made the mistake of dragging my ex-boyfriend to a military history museum and then feeling rushed because he didn’t want to read everything on every plaque like I did. This is precisely the problem artist dates solve. Dates can range from visiting exhibits and galleries, artist talks or performances, concerts or movies, spending the entire day reading a book, or listening to music in the peace of your own home without any other distractions. I heard about artist dates from Janice MacLeod (author of Paris Letters) and had planned to have one every month during 2015. Life got busy and all kinds of excuses not to have artist dates turned into no artist dates by the middle of the year. I set the bar lower this year, at four, hoping I can do this once a quarter.

February 19, 2017 - George Takei’s Allegiance

May 13, 2017 - Citizen by Claudia Rankine

June 2, 2017 - Jordan Peele’s Get Out

December 7, 2017 - Tom Hanks/Emma Watson/Dave Eggers, The Circle

51. Learn to sew on a button. Whenever my buttons need help I take the clothes to my favorite seamstress and pay $4 for the repair and make who knows how many carbon emissions driving over to her place.

52. Watch Star Wars. I’ve never seen it, so I have no idea about the allusions, the “Star Wars nights” at sporting events, or the Cold War metaphors about race, gender, and nation. I wasn’t very impressed.

#52 list #2017 #goals #travel #explore #nicos52list #52 list project #new year

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