#cainscontent

[cainware]

Something so satisfying about the idea of Jason moving out of Gotham and moving in with Kyle in NY after all the drifting from place to place, self-discovery, and the death of his best friend. (Oh lord here we go, Jay's gonna write a half-baked fic again):

It's a shitty apartment, but Kyle offers up what little space he has to give Jason a home, because God knows the man needs a place to call home now. The closest thing he had to call home in a person is dead, or a family that doesn't even really see him as a person half the time so much as a problem to be fixed or contained; Kyle doesn't expect to take that place or be anything excessively important, but he does have a couch and a few extra cups of instant noodles he can share.

And then Jason lives there. He's been there for a month, and Kyle is noticing changes. Jason isn't anything like what Kyle expected when he first met him years ago; he calm, he's quiet, he's smart. He's multidimensional, and that never really rang true until Kyle noticed Jason seemed comfortable enough to let his guard down.

Kyle also notices other changes. Such as a lack of being hounded about rent by the landlord, an increase in actual food in the apartment, and a stack of books that used to occupy the floor on an actual bookshelf. He debates asking a lot of the time, but he never finds the right way. Instead, he leaves it alone for a year.

The year rounds out. Kyle finally asks, because his entire apartment doesn't look half as bad as it did when Jason moved in. He finds Jason in the kitchen, cooking, and the whole place smells like Kyle's childhood. Spices that make his nose tickle and his mouth water fill the air, and he finds Jason leaned against the counter, scrolling through his phone with one hand and stirring the pot on the stove with the other. He's humming, a tune Kyle can't place but recognizes, somehow.

"Hey, Jay?" Kyle starts, eyeing his roommate as Jason looks up and, be still his beating heart, smiles at him.

"Oh, hey." Jason says, putting his phone down on the counter. He's giving Kyle his full attention, a gesture he usually reserves for important conversation. "I would've texted you about dinner, but y'know. I kinda just started."

"Nah, that's fine." Kyle says, waving off the statement. "I did want to talk to you, though. About uh... the apartment?" He doesn't miss the way Jason's shoulders tense, the way his jaw sets. He curses himself as he realizes how that must have sounded, knowing Jason must be expecting the worst now.

"Sure. Let me just-" Jason says, turning to knock the heat on the stove top down to low. Kyle watches him, the way his fingers just slightly falter with the knob. He's nervous.

"Its nothing bad, Jay." Kyle says quickly, and almost as if he's said some magic word, Jason visibly relaxes. His hand draws back from the stove dial slowly, and he turns to look at Kyle. "Its just... have you been paying the backrent? And... all the furniture and the food- Jay, I can't afford to pay you back."

"Whoa, whoa, slow your roll, bud! Who said anything about paying me back?" Jason asks, furrowing his eyebrows as he leans back against the counter. "Dude, you're letting me live here, and between your day job and running around doing... whatever it is Lanterns do, I don't know your life, you don't exactly make the big bucks. The least I can do is help you keep your shithole in your hands. And respectfully, after week three, if I had to eat one more cup of shrimp-flavored noodles, I was gonna murder you in your sleep."

"Jason." Kyle sighs, tucking his hands in his pockets as he eyes the floor. "Thanks, man. I've been stressing out for a year now about where in God's name I was gonna find the means to pay you back for this."

"And now you can rest easy, dreamboat. Now, do you or do you not want me to finish dinner before the game? I'm not gonna sit here and listen to you bitch about missing anything again." Jason warns, lifting the spoon out of the pot to wave at Kyle in a mock-threat.

"Right, right. Let the chef work his magic, and we all go to ved happy." Kyle laughs, holds up his hands defensively as he moves to leave the kitchen area. He pauses then, leaning into the room again to eye Jason. "Oh, and Jay?"

"Hm?" Jason doesn't look up, eyes focused on his methodical stirring. Kyle grins to himself, deciding that if Jason is so comfortable with him as to call him fucking dreamboat directly to his face, he may as well enjoy it.

"You make a great housewife, sweetheart." He ducks just as a knife flies into the wallpaper beside his head, laughing as he scrambles away from the kitchen as a flurry of yelling in the heaviest Gotham accent he's ever heard barrels out the door after him.

"I'm so poisoning your food, Rayner!"

#jaykyle #jason todd #kyle rayner #mmmmdomestic jaykyle go brrrr #jason is healing and kyle is a good friend #and these two have just accepted theyre dating without actually saying it by the end lmao #jason screaming in the heaviest new jersey accent while kyle runs for his life? thats true love baby #do i actually fix typos or do you guys deal with it who tf knows but also im lazy and wrote this during my 30min lunchbreak #dont ask jason where he gets the money from sometimes questions are better left unanswered #cainscontent

[cainware]

"If you could ask the universe one question, what would it be?" Its a broad question, and everyone in their bizarre little family of freaks, heroes, and side-shows would answer it differently. But as Jason stood there, staring at his youngest brother, he knew his own was different.

"When did I lose the parts of myself that weren't just anger?" He says, hands in his pockets as he looked away from Damian, casting his gaze towards the glowing screen of the batcomputer and its ongoing scan in favor of looking down at the person that, arguably, knew everyone in this family better than anyone, even Bruce.

"That's a stupid question, Todd." Damian replied, crossing his arms as he watched his older brother stare at the screen. "You never lost that. Because as much as you'd like everyone to believe you are only anger and strength, brute force and bitterness? You're not. You never have been."

"How do you figure that, little bird?" Jason decides to ask, turning back to Damian. He's grateful for his mask, a hiding place where he can retain some semblance of indifference. Damian snorts, turns to return to the computer to finish analyzing something Bruce had him working on earlier.

"Because out of everyone in this family, only one of us does everything out of love, Todd."

#this isn't ship dont fucking tag it as such #im just having a lot of emotions regarding that one panel of damian calling jason the most emotional in their family #jason todd #damian wayne #batfam #batfamily #ill never forgive dc for how rare they let jason show his love for his family and gotham so im providing my own content #jason todd does everything out of love be it crime or stopping crime #be it helping or even deceiving his family he does it because he has to #looking at you future state gotham #cainscontent

[cainware]

Do you guys ever think about Bruce being afraid of Clark? And not in the sense of "Oh this man is literally invincible", no. But in the sense of "this man is comfortable enough with me to be vulnerable, to express his feelings, and what if he shouldn't?"

Bruce, who has watched time and time again, the ones he loves get hurt either because of him or as a result of being associated with him. Bruce, who has begun to close off his emotional needs more often than not in order to operate as the bat. Bruce, who is dark and gritty and so full of love but so afraid to show it.

But then there's Clark. Strong, kind, shining gold Clark. Clark, who doesn't hesitate to talk to him. Clark, who extends his hand in friendship and perhaps more, because he trusts Bruce and cares deeply for him. Clark, who's sunshine and tenderness Bruce can only dream of having.

Do you guys think that openness, that level of soft warmth, scares Bruce? That when he does take Clark's hand, he's so full of fear that it's almost euphoric when calm washes over him instantly with Clark's warm, calloused hand in his own. That Clark wraps Bruce up in his arms, and Bruce feels the safest he's ever felt in years.

"I was starting to think you didn't like me, Bruce."

"Quite the opposite. But I've been afraid to admit it."

#superbat #does this make sense at all or am i fuckin delusional and sleep deprived lmao #i just think the first time clark hugs bruce #bruce melts and damn near tears up #because hes never felt this kind of warmth #its like taking a nap in a warm spring day beneath an apple tree #and he could just cry #clark kent #bruce wayne #cainscontent

[cainware]

Biblically accurate Vash curling his multiple sets of wings around Wolfwood, and Wolfwood finds it equal parts annoying and endearing because now he can't fucking move

#vashwood #cainscontent #vash the stampede #nicholas d. wolfwood #wolfwood #trigun #vash wanted attention and wolfwood wouldnt give it so hes decided to take it by (peaceful) force

[cainware]

The idea of sleepy Vash calling Wolfwood "Wolfie" will never not be adorable to me.

And for that matter, I fully believe that if Wolfwood was ever sleeping in his arms, sometimes Vash will get so overwhelmed with love for everything Wolfwood is and how precious his life specifically is that Vash would just. Cradle him closer, bury his face in Wolfwood's hair, and try to quietly resist the urge to cry over the sheer beauty of the life coursing through Wolfwood. And I firmly believe that Wolfwood would be awake for it, would experience the full crushing weight of everything that it means to be Vash's special person, but Vash would never know.

#i posted abt this on twitter but i want it here too #cain why are you screaming about vashwood you ask and i answer because theyre a tragedy that deserved happiness #cainscontent #vashwood #this is probably ooc idk but like depending on which version of vashwood it is its more or less ooc #vash the stampede #wolfwood #nicholas d. wolfwood

[cainware]

Thinking about the idea that sometimes Jason goes mute for the sheer fact that he just. Can't form words. Whether it's from how long he spent mute after clawing himself from his grave, general disassociating, his various trauma or specifically the fact that he had his fuckin neck sliced open before is irrelevant, but the thought of him wordlessly moving through the manor and only offering small nods of acknowledgement or shrugs.

And then Cass catches on. Her signing at Jason to ask him if he knows how, and him signing back that yes he does. Her smiling and immediately asking if he would like to talk about what's bothering him, and it spirals into them talking via sign language about something totally different. Just Cass and Jason, sat at the table in the kitchen grinning and signing back and forth, because sometimes it's just easier for them to communicate without speaking, and they have each other to understand that.

#jason todd #cassandra cain #its headcanon time again fellas <3 #idk selectively or situationally mute jason is very important to me #especially as someone that has a tendency to go mute due to being overwhelmed a lot that doesn't know asl #or any other version of sign language either #not for lack of wanting to know of course #cainscontent

[cainware]

This was always how it was going to end. Jason Todd has been dead since the beginning. The man you see before you is a ghost story; he is nothing but a walking reminder that the universe, in all her fickle cosmic ways, will always mark the damned from the moment they're conceived.

Jason Todd was born to die. Jason Todd was born to live, born to love, and born to suffer for it. The tragedy lies within the heart, within the atoms of stardust that came together in just the right ways to create a man so full of love, that it tore him apart from the inside out. A destiny of pain, wrought from the ashes of compassion.

Kyle Rayner has read this story from cover to cover. He has seen it line for line, written the thesis and sent it back for review, vain hope within his soul that somehow, his prayers for a better ending would be answered.

The ending never changes. He can feel it in his bones that no matter the timeline, Jason Todd will always suffer, will always dig himself from his grave in some form and will always breathe in the fog of the graveyard with weak, frantic lungs.

Kyle Rayner knows, in the core of his being, that he cannot love Jason Todd in the ways that would fix the broken parts. He knows he cannot solve this cosmic dilemma, that he cannot change the universe that is Jason with gestures of faith and blind kindness. But still, he tries.

Jason lets him in slowly, and the farther through the door Kyle finds himself, the more he realizes the terrifying truth.

Jason Todd was born to die for love. Jason Todd, in all his bravado and worldly experience, was crafted from the light of a dying star. It makes Kyle's heart ache, to see a man so built for good find no solace in the world that killed him. So Kyle Rayner decides to put in the work.

It takes years. Years of patience, of carefully reaching out and allowing Jason the knowledge that he's there, that he won't beg for Jason to see him so much as wait for him to notice. Kyle offers a net to catch him as he plummets, a perch for the former Robin to roost on the days his wings are too tired to fly. Kyle works a thankless job, day in and day out, of making Jason feel safe and loved like he does for so many others.

And then the day comes that Kyle finds himself without a net of his own. The dawn finds him at deaths door, and Kyle is willing to accept his fate at the cost of saving the universe. But the end never comes.

They say that red light travels the farthest at the fastest rate, and Kyle knows this to be true in his experience. But a lesser known fact of the basics of the prisms of light is that violet light, while the slowest, also carries the most energy. It has the highest frequency of any of the wavelengths of light, and thus, is the most powerful wave of light.

Patience, Kyle learns, is a virtue. For as he opens his eyes, surprised by the fact that he's still part of the living, he finds himself encased in a protective structure crafted of violet light. His eyes follow the thin line of connecting light, his lips curving into a soft smile at the sight that greets him.

Before him, his protector stands juxtaposed to the stars, a soft glow of violet light radiating from him and his ring. Jason Todd smiles back at him, and Kyle counts himself lucky to see that crooked grin again.

"You know, if you were going to go and die out here all alone, the least you could've done was call."

Jason Todd was a man born to die. But the dead have a funny thing about laying still when their hearts, full of so much to give, continue to beat. Kyle Rayner knows many things, and he knows one thing quite well: no man nor grave can hold the love of a Star Sapphire once its been earned.

#ficlets #kyle rayner #jason todd #jaykyle #idk what this is i was feeling sick so i just laid in the floor and typed until i felt better lmao #star sapphire jason todd #cainscontent

[cainware]

After seeing basilknells ion Kyle and Jason art I'm really out here having feelings about Kyle rewriting the world, knowing Jason is going to die, and Jason comforting him because he's always going to be fated to die. So have this little snippet I couldn't help but write.

"Do me one favor though, while you're rewriting the universe?" Jason asks, cupping the side of Kyle's face.

"Anything." Kyle says, and it sounds breathless, desperate. A prayer to himself, that whatever it is Jason asks, he'd be able to deliver.

"Make sure I still get to meet you in this new world of yours." Jason says, and Kyle feels his strength waning, his body feeling impossibly heavy with the weight of everything he can never say. There's just not enough time, not enough words strong enough to describe how Jason's smile, though laced with a grief only Kyle could understand in this moment, makes him feel.

So he doesn't say anything. Instead, he follows the gentle pull of Jason's touch, the shallow warmth of Jason's hand on his cheek bringing him into the soft kiss that ignites him from the inside out.

He may never remember this. He's decided he won't, none of them will. But he promises, in the silent, soft embrace of their lips, that he'll honor Jason's request. They'll meet again, as strangers. But Kyle hopes, and in that warm fire that consumes him as he writes over the universe, maybe even wills it into existence, that they'll get to be more.

#jaykyle #basilknell i love ur jaykyle art so much i really do!! #jason todd #kyle rayner #im emotional i really am and i want to share this with yall #cainscontent

[cainware]

Imagine Bruce Wayne never learned how to flip a coin until he was in college. He tried, and tried, and tried. But he couldn't get it down. And then Harvey comes along, teaches him how to flip a coin with a bottle cap. Maybe they're drinking, maybe they're flirting. Harvey teaches him, and Bruce spends weeks practicing until he can finally do it. He shows Harvey the day of, excitedly rushing into their shared dorm to show him his new talent, and Harvey is just as excited as he is.

Years later, Bruce Wayne reflects under the cowl, as he looks down at the bottlecap in his hands. Harvey Dent, Two-Face, is sitting in the cop car, about to be taken back to Arkham. Batman approaches him, and hands him the bottle cap.

"To replace your coin." He says, voice gruff. He thinks he's being slick, until Harvey looks at him, eyes shining with some sort of recognition.

"Just like old times, right, Brucie?" Harvey asks, laughing quietly as he looks down at the object in his cuffed hands. It shines brand new, a coca-cola cap discarded by an officer.

"Exactly like old times." Bruce makes a note to visit him. It's been too long, and he misses his best friend.

#bruharvey #oh we got feelings in this bitch because i just learned how to flip a bottle cap recently and it made me Emotional #bruce wayne #harvey dent #cainscontent

[cainware]

“Hey, Jay? Can I ask you something?” Kyle asked, pushing the door to the bathroom open despite the cloud of steam that puffed into his face in retaliation. He left the door standing open, stepping into the room

“I’m in the shower, but come on in, I guess.” Jason replied, voice lifting an octave in surprise at the sudden interruption. He didn’t sound annoyed, though, so Kyle took the invitation. As Jason sighed, Kyle grinned, laughing quietly as he moved to sit on the edge of the sink counter.

“Sorry, but it’s kind of been on my mind for like... a few weeks now.” Kyle stated, waving a hand idly in the air despite the fact that Jason couldn’t see it. In response, he heard the sound of Jason continuing his shower, soap scrubbing against skin and rinsing down the drain.

“Oh, that’s not concerning at all. Kyle having consistent thoughts? Do tell, and let me know if your ears start smoking.” Jason said, and Kyle could picture the grin on his friend’s face, lopsided and slightly crooked. He felt warmth rise to his cheeks, and for a moment he fumbled with the words he'd planned in his head.

"Shut up, you're a dick." Kyle said, casting his eyes towards the shower. He couldn't see any shape behind the curtain, the black outer curtain hiding anything and everything behind it. But he knew what Jason looked like, and he turned away quickly at the thought.

"Actually I'm a Jason, Dick is my brother. But go on." Jason snorted, and Kyle had to resist the urge to reach through the curtain and strangle him. He wasn't making this easy, but then again, Kyle had barged in on him during a shower. It wasn't exactly a level playing field to begin with, but Donna had suggested he catch him when he was busy, and this was as good as anything.

"Let me just start with: we're both like... obviously not straight, right?" Kyle questioned, finding a spot on the wall across from him to stare aimlessly at. They really needed to wipe down these walls one day soon, the space above the moulding was awful.

"Kyle, we have a pride flag hanging over our couch and another in the hallway. No, we're not straight." Kyle tensed for a moment, casting his eyes back to the shower curtain when he heard it move. Jason's face was poking out from behind it, staring at him with the most deadpan expression Kyle had ever seen as beads or water rolled from his soaked hair and down his cheek. "Or at least I'm not. Where are you going with this?"

So this was it then. The moment of truth Kyle had been anxiously waiting for all evening was here, and he couldn't drop the ball now. With a slow breath, Kyle continued.

"So are we... are we not straight but like... together? Or like a separate just friends kind of deal?" Kyle finally asked, kicking himself for how awkward that had sounded. He had wanted to sound smooth and like he wasn't mentally biting his nails, but instead he sounded just as pathetic as Donna had said he would. Go figure, he thought, with her unique brand of wisdom.

The sound of Jason laughing caught him off guard, and Kyle watched as Jason's crooked grin shifted into a full laugh, eyes squeezing shut and nose crinkling up in the way that made the scar on his lip strain. Kyle felt bewitched, watching in awe as Jason slowly opened his eyes and fixed them back on him, that crooked grin softening to something different, something Kyle hadn't seen before.

"Now what do you think the answer to that is?" Jason asked, and Kyle felt as if he'd swallowed a hundred butterflies as he scrambled for an answer.

"I uh... well, I can tell you that I want it to be us together but..." Kyle trailed off, chewing on the inside of his lip as he scratched his nails against the fabric of his sweatpants. Jason snorted, a small huff of laughter compared to the one from before.

"Well, you're in luck, buddy. Cause I thought we were a thing this whole time." Jason teased, head disappearing back behind the shower curtain to leave Kyle to stare, wide-eyed and surprised. "Honestly, get with the program."

"Y'know what? I changed my mind. I don't like you, you're being a jackass." Kyle replied, but his lips curled into a smile regardless, and his words lacked any real bite. "Don't you know it's not right to be mean to your boyfriend?"

"Look at him! He asks if we're a couple and then he calls himself my boyfriend, I love a quick learner!" Jason cried, faking a dramatic voice behind the curtain as he flung a hand out, moving it as if it were talking for him. Kyle fell into a fit of laughter, his nerves settling finally as he felt the weight lifting off his shoulders.

"Oh my god, you're such a bitch!" Kyle said, unable to keep himself together as he snorted, laughter filling the room in all the empty spaces between the steam.

"You got that right, baby! But you're stuck with me! Forever!"

#jaykyle #listen this is just some feelgood shit for myself okay #jason todd #kyle rayner #i love them and tbh idk if this is good but im posting it anyway #if you see a typo no you fucning didnt #kyle What Are Boundaries rayner just WALTZING IN ON THE HOMO-IE SHOWERING #cainscontent

[cainware]

Headcanon time:

Jason still smokes post-resurrection. It's not super frequent, but when he's feeling exceptionally stressed, he takes a break and smokes. Mostly only when someone dies, when a mission has tested his last nerve, or when he's had a particularly rough time adjusting to being social that day. So, once a day, a few times a week. But he's not the guy that smokes two packs a day, not at all.

Something everyone picks up on is how Jason behaves while he smokes. He looks lost, whether in thought or otherwise. His hands tremble, his breath shakes, and his jaw is tense. His attention is anywhere but present, his mind floating off to some far corner of the world behind his eyes until he's stamping the cigarette butt out and tossing it in the ashtray or in a trashcan.

Everyone picks up on how Jason behaves after he smokes. He makes jokes, but they feel tense. He rolls his shoulders as if he'd just gotten done sparring. He feels... off. And if they're in one of Jason's many hole-in-the-wall safe places, he sprays himself and the room down with a bottle of fabreeze. He even has a bottle of it in his car, god forbid.

He can't kick the habit. He hates the smell of smoke because it triggers something inside his head, something deep down. Something, they think, is akin to a primal fear. And yet, he still does it. Nobody can figure out why.

Jason doesn't tell them it's because sometimes, triggering himself is the only way he can prevent a worse episode down the line. He'd rather shake and struggle through it now than be tucked away like he'd been jabbed with fear-toxin later.

#angst time angst time with a health side of projecting my smoking habits and self-triggering onto Jason <3 #this is fine to rb btw like i enjoy seeing peoples responses to my headcanons #also yes i do have a bottle of fabreeze in my car lmao so jason gets one too #also one of jasons triggers being smoke because of the explosion will live with me forever so #jason todd #headcanons #tw smoking #i guess? idk if thats a tw folks need or not #cainscontent

[cainware]

Jason Todd remembers things gradually. The Lazarus Pit scrambled his mind, but time and patience are helping. He's learning to be kind to himself, learning what it means for him to be alive again.

He rereads his favorite books, the ones Alfred says were his favorites. He learns to cook again, learns the proper way to cut carrots and not have them fly off the cutting board.

He remembers what the kitchen smelled like on his 16th birthday, the smell of sweet and sugary cake Alfred insisted on making himself. He remembers Dick, shoving his face into the cake, and being too caught up in the laughter to be angry at the frosting in his hair.

He remembers being 14, and Bruce, teaching him all he knows, and telling him it was past his bedtime and they'd do more tomorrow. He smiles at the memory as he passes the memorial. His words echo in his own head, followed by Bruce's laughter, a sound they all miss dearly. "What kind of 14 year old has a bedtime, Bruce?"

Jason has a lot left to recover. He's rebuilding his life, piece by piece, and he has a family that wants to help him. He wants to help them, too. But Jason also knows, in his very core, that the way to help them is to help himself. So he focuses on healing. He focuses on getting right with himself, on remembering what he can and having them fill him in on the things he's missing. He attends his therapy, he practices his exercises.

Gotham needs him. His family needs him. And every day, he's remembering more and more what he's fighting for, why he fights at all. Jason knows that even if he never remembers everything, the memories he's making here and now, with everyone in the Belfry, is more than enough of a reason to be happy he's alive.

#jason todd #gotham knights #im having really fucking big feelings about gotham knights jason if you guys cant tell #something about seeing a well executed version of jason recovering and rejoining the family means so much to me #it makes my heart swell with joy and break all at once #cainscontent #cainschatter

[cainware]

Vashwood x "for every breath is a whispered prayer and holy men are desperate to believe in something"

#cainscontent #do i know what this means exactly no because im sleep deprived but!!! #someone who knows more about religion than me (and atheist) and likes vashwood feel free to analyze this #because idk why but it feels perfect for them #vashwood #fuck it up yall cause all i have are vague ideas and severe burnout lmaooo

[cainware]

No because @iinmysights rb'd my post about eldest daughter syndrome dick and they mentioned dick going to jason for comfort every once in a while and now I'm having feelings.

Because Dick never had anyone he could vent to fully. He had friends, he had Barbara, he had Donna, he had Kori, but he never really tells any of them everything from what I've seen. Because in the titans, whatever he did would reflect back on Bruce, and he couldn't possibly let anything negative reflect back on Batman. That just wouldn't do.

So where does that leave Dick? Especially after Wally, one of his best friends if not THE best friend, isn't in the picture anymore? Where does that leave Dick, who has gone through so much and lost so much, when he feels like there's nowhere else to turn? Where does that leave Dick, when he doesn't want to burden Donna? Or anyone else?

Imagine the surprise when Dick reaches out. Not because Jason doesn't care, but because he doesn't expect it. He thinks he's the last person Dick would reach out to, even though it's happened in the past. He thinks, in his mind, that Dick would reach out to literally anyone else.

But he reaches for Jason. He shows up, unannounced, at the unmarked safehouse Jason is using. He's on the border between Gotham and Blüdhaven, hiding out and letting the heat drop off before he steps foot outside again. And here's Dick Grayson, the legend behind Nightwing himself, asking to come in.

Jason let's him, brings him in before the storm can roll through him too hard. Dick sits on his couch, Jason offers him some of his shitty takeout, and Dick rags on him for preferring spring rolls over noodles. Jason distracts him, makes jokes and rags on how he's still wearing the same fucking Beatles shirt he's had since 1993.

It's comforting. Jason fills the silence, he listens when Dick starts to break. Jason doesn't expect perfection. He doesn't expect Dick to articulate everything, doesn't expect Dick to crack wise and account for everyone else. Jason just let's Dick breathe, and they work it out together late into the night until Dick has spilled his guts and feels exhausted, face stained with tears from the sheer force of the emotional bomb that went off inside his body.

Dick apologizes for exploding like that, for being a mess. Jason shrugs, makes a distasteful joke about being used to bombs, and Dick ends up leaving with the sunrise. Jason picks up empty containers from the takeout, ignores the way his stomach growls because he let Dick eat what he bought for himself. He doesn't mind.

If nothing else, Jason takes comfort in knowing that when things fall through, Dick knows he can lean on him. After all, when everyone else turns to Dick, it's a pretty important gig being the one Dick turns to.

#theyre brothers and i love them #this is pretty much all i had the energy for so please be kind to me rn lmao but this has been rummaging #in my head like a raccoon in the trashcan for a while now #jason todd #dick grayson #im screamin im cryin dick graysons eldest daughter syndrome is very personal to me #and him turning to jason in his time of need shot my knees out and ive been laying on the floor crying over it #because i love that for them so much #i know he had donna too but like dico grayson would rather die than tall about his problems #cainscontent

[cainware]

"Thank you for seeing me when no-one else would. Promise you won't forget me?"

It feels like Kyle Rayner is having his heart ripped out of his chest, but he smiles anyway. Cradled in his arms in the broken, bloody body of Jason Todd, the man that came into his life as a menace and had the audacity to establish himself as a friend, and then something more. Kyle carefully pulls Jason's mangled form closer, holding him tight as he feels the weak, raspy breathing inside Jason's chest.

"Please, Kyle... promise me." Jason wheezes, and Kyle feels like he's going to be sick to his stomach. He remembers this feeling. He felt it when he found Alex stuffed in the fridge; that cold, creeping sensation of fear and dread that takes root within your chest and spirals down, it's claws buried in your flesh as if to say 'you'll die together, your grief and you'.

"I... I promise, Jay. I won't." There's nothing he can do. His ring is shattered, broken under the sheer force of trying to shield the two of them from a power that splits worlds in half. Jason just happened to be on the half that didn't survive.

Jason's eyes, once so full of life, a beautiful blue that Kyle used to dream of painting skies with, met his own. They were empty. Vacant.

Kyle screams. He screams until he bolts upright, eyes wild and heart hammering in his chest. He can't breathe, he can't see. A light strikes, shines from the side of the room. Kyle feels hands on his face, and slowly, he wills himself to look for their source.

Jason blesses his vision, alive and well, if not worried for Kyle's well-being. He cups Kyle's face, and Kyle let's out a slow breath. He reaches out, his arms sliding around Jason's waist as he pulls him close, desperate to feel warmth in his partner's skin again.

"Easy, big guy... it's just a nightmare, you're alright. I'm right here."

#nightmares are fun arent they #we rockin with nightmare jaykyle? #jaykyle #lmao i legit wrote this because i passed out for an hour and woke up in the most severe panic ive had in months #idek what i was dreaming about for an hour but that shit Spooked Me #tw character death #even though it isnt real #tw angst #tw nightmares #idk i feel like these are things i should tag #also i literally just wrote this after waking up so its probably real shit lmao but either way i needed it out of my system #cainscontent

[cainware]

Do you ever think about how hearing Bruce died impacts Jason? How it probably stings so much, given that he had just finally started to repair their relationship? How he was finally coming into his own, and just as he personally feels like they're bridging the gap created so long ago, Bruce is ripped away from him?

Jason, who despite everything, could never stop seeing Bruce as his father. Jason, who sits in absolute silence save for comforting his siblings, who dodges Dick's attempts to get him to vent because no, Dick, you have to grieve too. Jason, who waits until the family has dispersed, who comes to Alfred, and just shatters.

Alfred holds him, all six-feet of trembling, panicking man, as if he were a fragile child. Because Jason is terrified, he's hurt, and he feels so very alone right now more than ever. Because his father is gone, and Alfred can only watch as Jason skids to a halt, a glorious trainwreck that he's powerless to stop.

#tw death #tw grief #So my stepmom just passed away #and I'm coping with that grief through fictional men and their emotions as a result: #jason todd #alfred pennyworth #bruce wayne #cainscontent