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pretty-little-howtown · 1 year

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Han Jisung x Idol!Reader

Genre: Suggestive, Fluff, Angust

Warnings: None (I know of, if there are any please let me know)

Word Count: 9569

Masterlist

You are a part of a 6 member girl group (CELESTE) under JYP

The group has a sort of ethereal almost mythological vibe

Each member represents, a mythical creature

The group had two previous comebacks before this theme

Mihi (lead dancer and sun vocals): fairy

The closest to the two previous comebacks

glitter purples pinks

art deco inspired, ordinary objects are pretty and ornate

Flowers, petals, some wind motifs as well

Hee-young(main vocalist, visual, makne):angel

sky heaven themes

Has a massive pair of wings in the MV

Gold, light blue

Wind motifs feathers

Yuri (main dancer, main vocals and sub rapper): elf

Also, elegant but there are glimpses of something darker

tree themes (think Galadriel LOTR)

Foresty, vines, some crystals mostly opal diamond selenite moonstone and white howlite

honestly, Lord of the Rings stylez

Aera (lead vocalist, visual): nymph

floral themes, water lilies, some more water themes

Perhaps suggest a sort of rusalka vibes (not explicit, just some sort of implication the nymph may be a vengeful spirit???)

The darker parts are more obvious but with a brighter colour palette that acts as a kind of misdirect

(Sugar Rush TXT vibes)

Y/N (main rapper, main vocals and sub dancer): vampire

The dark parts are now on full display, and fully embraced

deep red blues greens

Lace, silver

gothic with a splash of grunge

Title track has scream’s (dreamcatcher) styling with the lacy dress parts not the magic in the MV lol with a cross between Odd Eye and Nxde (with it’s sampling of classical music)

B side track is the one you got to go crazy on. It’s full rock/ metal think I Miss the Misery by Halestorm with Odd Eye’s styling)

Nam-Gli (leader and lead rapper): witch

The dark parts continue with as much elegance, but there’s a certain finality to it

dark purples, black, gold, and silver

Misty, foresty but a darker green to Yuri similar to Odd Eye MV

(As an aside: the birth order is Nam-Gli, Y/N, Aera, Mihi, Yuri, Hee-young)

Each comeback is based on one of the mythical creatures of one of the members

The group is very popular, but because comebacks are rarer than for most k-groups not massively successful

A lot goes into giving the perfect vibe, a lot of you do brand deals and modeling on the side. Aera has two dramas under her belt

You, Yuri and Nam-Gli have your own lil side trio, with you and Yuri being a duo when Nam-Gli is busy. y’all cover your favorite songs usually by other trios

The three of you had covered 3RACHA songs several times and the fans loved it

The three of you settled on the members that complemented your rapping styles with Nam-gli usually covering Han’s lines Yuri Changbin’s and you Bang Chan’s

The fans absolutely adored your little trios 3RACHA covers so JYP had the grand idea of getting your groups together and you started doing more activities with them

It started off slowly, with the label testing the waters

At first it was just your trio and 3RACHA doing a lyric challenge of sorts where they would have to rap the next line of yours and your group members verses while you would have to do the same with 3RACHA songs

The atmosphere was really nice and to your surprise you seemed to bounce off Jisung the most

You didn’t really think much of it at the time, the company probably wanted to strike while the iron was hot and get both groups some more promotion

You didn’t really think you’d see any of Stray Kids again

The company, however, had other ideas. After the fan response they knew they struck gold and quickly set up more activities for both groups

Despite initially being shocked to see Stray Kids again you found yourself natural drifting towards Jisung in the group interactions

Really quickly it was easy to see you and Jisung had wonderful chemistry in the group shows and so you ended up doing separate vlives just the two of you

The very first one started off a bit strange, the two of you had no idea what to say to each other when it was just the two of you. During group activities, the two of you would sit next to each other either piling on top of one another in fits of laughter when another member said something you found funny; defending something either of you said that you agreed on, or playfully arguing whenever you inevitably disagreed

One time, both groups were asked if a sauna was burning, what would you rather cover your private parts or your face. You and Jisung collapsed in on each other when Seungmin said the question was probably which would you protect from burning

In short, you could always rely on other members to say something for the two of you to react to

You both awkwardly asked how your morning was at the same time before bursting out with laughter, slightly diffusing the tension. While the rest of the live was slightly awkward, the initial icebreaker allowed you to joke with each other a little more

From then on, the lives usually consisted of you guys catching up with each other, Jisung excitedly telling you about his busy days while you filled him in on yours

The lives had different vibes depending on where they took place, if it was in the Stray Kids dorm the lives were far more chaotic; one day he threw a pillow at you. You glared at him, beckoning with your finger for him to come over. He looked terrified, and you struggled to keep your grin in. You subtly grasped the pillow he threw at you in your hand and hit him with all your strength, starting a pillow fight which, much to your chagrin, Jisung ended up winning

He would always do mildly annoying things to get a rise out of you, but you dealt with it with a Stoic patience, only occasionally giving in. Every live always ended in laughter

You would often stay round afterward as both of you had a break, he was remarkably chill when the cameras weren’t on him, it was difficult to get used to but refreshing

After a few hours of being high energy, you were both tired, so you’d either put on a movie or scroll through your phones, showing each other memes and catching each other up on things you couldn’t say on camera

You told him about all the comebacks for Celeste. He asked more about the groups' concept in general, and you happily explained how with each comeback a certain member is focused on as it’s their theme. Celeste's last comeback was fairy themed, so Mihi was featured the most, and she had more freedom to implement her vision. You joked that for this comeback, she became the group's pseudo leader

Jisung quickly asked when your theme would come up.

You said not for a while, as the company wants the group to establish themselves with more feminine themes first. You said Yuri’s was next, and you were still super excited by it. The concept she talked you through sounded amazing

“What concept have you got?” Jisung quickly asked. He was leaning towards you on the couch, and he’d put his phone down, listening intently

You were extremely taken aback, you’d talked at length about it with your group, seeing if they were okay with all your ideas, and they were annoyingly accommodating it made you want to cry a little.

They’d suggest ways to make your vision come true without compromising it in any way. They said it was because you did the exact same thing with their ideas. It made them really happy, and they wanted to make you happy as well

You shyly started with the mythological creature your theme was about and Jisung’s eyes went wide, “Vampire?! That’s so cool!!”

This boosted your confidence a little and you told him everything. How you wanted it to be inspired by classic vampire literature with a modern rock twist. You listed your inspirations from Dracula and Carmila to Halestorm’s music. You said you wanted the music video set to be in a gothic revival house (you didn’t mind if it was a replica or green screen as long as it fit the vibe) like Strawberry Hill in London. You realized that the rock vibe probably won’t be accepted by the higher ups, but you were sure as hell gonna try

Jisung looked at you in awe, you were amazing already, but even more so when you talked about your project. The determination in your eyes made him smile

Lives in your groups' dorm were a lot more chilled out, both of you having chill conversations perhaps scrolling through your phones if there was a lull in activity on the vlive but mostly responding to comments made by fans

This is where the fans really got to see a different side to the both of you. Often you would be working on something while Jisung read out the comments. You stop what you were doing and join in the conversation. Then you would switch, Jisung would put in an ear bud and work on his music while you carried the conversation

Occasionally you would set out vlives where people could just work with the two of you, usually when you had deadlines coming up

In the vlives at your dorm you would always be draped over each other in some way, just general keeping physical contact

For some reason after these vlives Jisung was full of energy and would end up causing a raucous, the two of you had a makeshift lightsaber fight, and you enjoyed it so much the two of you impulsive brought lightsaber replicas after

When yours arrived, you raced over to the Stray Kids dorm ready to challenge Jisung, you burst through his door activating your white lightsaber, but your eyes went wide when you noticed he was in the middle of a live

You blinked a couple times trying to hold back a laugh, “I’m so sorry, I’ll wait” you left the room with your lightsaber making whooshing noises as you left the room and closed the door

You could hear Jisung burst out laughing as Minho passed you, saying “told you so”

You quickly checked the vlive to make sure the fans weren’t mad that you interpreted, thankfully only a small handful said what you did was really disrespectful, while most were clearly enjoying themselves. There were lots of laughing emojis, with loads asking if it was a lightsaber

Jisung replied smiling saying how after your last vlive together you impulse brought yourselves lightsabers, “mine actually came today” he enthused and took out a purple lightsaber

You laughed as he swooshed it around, hearing the replica make the noise

Your cheeks heated up when all the comments started saying “lmao y/n’s a massive nerd’ Jisung laughed on your phone screen nodding his head

His eyes seemed to light up as he talked about how much you loved Star Wars and how you knew so many historical facts and how much you knew about architecture

Your stomach pleasantly twisted, causing a shiver to run up your spine

You saw Jisung sign off and quickly pocketed your phone, but not before you saw a comment teasingly saying he ‘shouldn’t keep his girlfriend waiting’

You hopped Jisung didn't glimpse that one, you knew he’d overthink your friendship and might stop acting in the same way he did

Besides, you didn’t need him overthinking at the same time as you were

He swung the door open and stared at you, expression unreadable. He took his lightsaber from behind his back and activated it, the purple glow lightly illuminated his upper body

You activated yours, and you dueled each other throughout the dorm before collapsing on the sofa and watching a movie like usual

A couple of days later, your two groups had to complete a series of challenges pulled from a challenge pile, you read yours out loud “challenge someone on the opposite team to a lightsaber duel”

You and Jisung burst out laughing, confusing both of your band members

You fell first. On a separate vlive someone asked how you’d managed to find such a good friend in Jisung, you look at the comment a little shocked, you didn’t know how to answer

Of course the content your groups make was thought of by the company for further promotion and without that you doubt you would have ever met Jisung

You tell the truth: you’re not sure, “but he always takes care of me. He always checks if I’ve eaten and checks in to see how I’m feeling, and I return the gesture in kind.” He’s always drinking energy drinks, and you’ve been trying to get him to cut back at least a little. “You’ve all seen the vlives I’m sure, and it thinks it’s really easy to tell that we’ve got a good rapport with each other and I think we’re gonna be good friends for a really long time”

Your heart clenches when you say friend, and you realise you want something more than just friendship

Jisung takes longer to come to terms with his feelings but where you lacked in action on your end he did not hesitate to initiate

Every time someone asks about you on one of his vlives his eyes light up as he compliments you to no end “she’s so nice, she always checks in on me, makes sure I’ve eaten. Oh! She’s trying to get me to cut back on energy drinks because the caffeine is bad for you and I drink way too much.” He’ll then go on to talk about your stage presence and how it absolutely mesmerises him and how you were the first member that caught his eye when your group debuted even though the fairy theme is the complete opposite of yours, you killed it

It takes relentless teasing from his band mates before he realises his feelings for you

He walks in after one of his vlives and his band mates are all talking about the will they won’t, they between the two do you

When they mention it to Jisung he obviously denies it saying he’d know if he had feelings for you, and he doesn’t, you’re just friends

Minho looks at him incredulously and pulls out an edit he saw of the two of you made by, clearly a very dedicated fan, “you look at her like you’d look at a girlfriend, and you say you don’t have feelings for her” he scoffs. “I do not look at her like that, and I do not have feelings for her. Can we drop this?”

That same night, he can’t help but reach for his phone and search your names on TikTok

The more edits he watches, the more he notices how he’s staring at you. His eyes really do betray him, and he remembered back to his vlive how his heart pounded when he talked about you and how he couldn’t stop smiling

He’d fallen hard

And just in time for your theme to be the centre of your group’s comeback

You kept it from Jisung because you wanted it to be a surprise you knew how excited he was for your theme to come up and every time he said it you willed your heart not to explode

Loads of your friends were excited, Jisung was no different, you told yourself

The comeback was steeped in deep blues, rich reds and engulfing greens, silver necklaces and black lace. The music’s tone was darker, like something watching from the shadows; it sent a chill down his spine as he watched the MV

You sampled a lot more classical music as well as used more classical instruments (violin especially) to give a more gothic feel to the comeback, all somehow perfectly intertwined with some fully rock songs.

At the very end, you let out a splendidly sultry laugh, showing off the fangs made especially for the comeback. If you had to be honest you kinda liked them, probably too much

JYP decided it would be good publicity for both groups to have Stray Kids react to your group’s most recent comeback, especially as the two groups were still close despite your groups popularity rising and thus having less activities together

There were lots of shocked expressions and ‘whoas’ coming from the group in general. They were used to the bright colour palettes and upbeat feelings of your group's songs

Despite there being a lot of posing and standing, the boys found it endlessly compelling, there were bursts of quick movement where the screen would go blank, and you would end up in a different place on the screen

Similarly, there would be a blur of motion followed by one of the members changing their position in the room

Jisung watched intently whenever, you showed up on screen of the title track’s MV, by the end he was brimming with pride knowing you were the main driving force behind the comeback

He watched you fully sink into the role, more than he’d ever seen you do before, you embodied the vampires of legend, you were dangerous but endlessly enticing

While most of the scenes took place on a set that resembled and old mediaeval castle, the choreography scenes were set inside a hall clearly inspired by Strawberry Hill

Chan, mostly impressed with the composition of the song, asked who’s theme the comeback was, before someone from behind the camera could answer Jisung beamed and yelled “Y/N’s it was Y/N’s.”

When the group looked at him questioningly, he said you had told him everything about your vision, he just had no idea it was coming up next. You must have kept it from him as a surprise

The group talked more about what they thought was really good about the comeback’s title track, from the lyrics to the set design

Next, they showed the boys the album’s B-side track; even Jisung, knowing everything he did, was utterly shocked. Like you mentioned, he didn’t think the company would allow you to do a fully rock song

The lyrics seemed to hit really close to home, the song expressed the frustration in knowing your feelings for someone but not being able to do anything about it, having to hold back every time they’re around you. Not allowing yourself to give in and the hurt that carried with that

Not to mention, the visuals were heartbreakingly beautiful, seeing you laying in a forest with a—very familiar to him—band hoodie and ripped bell bottom jeans just staring at the sky made him feel things!

All he could do was stare at the screen watching the credits roll by, and he kept noticing your name a lot more than in the title track

Everyone was in awe and thought they’d seen it all

The video ended with the whole of Stray Kids wishing your group the best of luck throughout your promotion and that they’ll see your group at your comeback stage

Needless to say it was an absolute hit, within the first couple hours there were already thousands views on the title track’s MV with the number was steadily growing

You and your group prepared frantically for the comeback backstage. Everyone was rushing about getting makeup and any clothing alterations done

Yuri rushed over to you to make sure you were okay, judging from your expression you were very anxious, “hey, what are you worried about?” she asked

You were taken slightly aback that she was able to tell, but realistically, who wouldn’t. It was very clear you had been a ball of stress ever since before the comeback was even released. “I don’t know, just-what if it all goes horribly wrong? It’s on me, I suggested the concept. I picked all the outfits, set the staging, sure the video has enough views, but they’re a meaningless metric of popularity for the company. If they don’t receive a high profit from album sales and promotions, that’s it. It’s the end-”

You continued rambling until Yuri interrupted you, “you were not the only one, if the company saw something they knew wouldn’t work they wouldn’t have let it happen. Besides, this comeback was awesome! I, for one, loved every second. I don’t think that’s the only reason you're nervous. I think it has something to do with a certain boy group member you often hang out with and his opinion”

You gave her a warning glance, taking a deep breath. Yuri just patted you on the back and let you finish getting ready

Jisung watched the entire comeback stage in awe, his expectations were utterly blown away, you looked stunning in your outfit and the looks you gave on stage were perfect

You brilliantly embodied the essence of enticing but deadly on screen and stage

The red skirt opened and closed around your thighs with every movement, contrasting with the tucked in baggy band T-shirt, that was also in the B-side music video. He smiled, you thought of every detail

God, he wanted to kiss you so bad

With the very last beat of the stage, fake blood was poured all over you and staying in character you smirked at the camera running your tongue over your teeth as you grinned bringing attention to the fangs you’d worn for the performance

You got a small break where you promote the album more, telling them there were more performances still to go

You did all that without paying any attention to the blood still dripping down your face, seeping into your clothes and Jisung couldn’t keep the image of you grinning as blood dripped down your face out of his head

you took one last gulp of water and set yourself in position for the B-Side track performance

It was just as high energy as the title track but with more intricate group movements usually surrounding you singing your lungs out in the middle

At the end you all bowed and one of the staff came out in stage whispering in your ear and ushering you off stage

Everyone was confused until Nam-Gli clarified the staff wanted you to get changed because the dripping blood was a bit of a safety hazard, all while avoiding several pools of fake blood on the floor

The audience and group laughed at the side steps, but thankfully staff came out with mops cleaning the blood patches

As they’d finished you ran back on stage and Jisung nearly choked, there was no way you could have looked more stunning on your big day yet here you were. Pulling out surprise after surprise

The entire outfit was skin tight, a stark contrast from the previous look, under the black jacket's front buckles was a black bustier top that slotted inside the hem of the leather chained and pleated skirt

Jisung was relieved to see you kept the thigh highs, he’d never admit it, but they were his favourite part of the ensemble

The stage continued with renditions of previous songs as well as a rehash of the title and B-Side until, tired and ready for bed, your group bid everyone goodbye leaving the stage

Turns out Stray Kids left early because they were all stood backstage waiting to congratulate you all

Jisung launched himself at you as soon as he saw you, enveloping you and in a tight hug. He breathed in your scent as he buried his face in your neck and refused to let go, until Chan cleared his throat at which point you separated

After several congratulations and cheers, the conversations started separating off

You stood next to Jisung with Changbin and Yuri, all of you conversing about the coming days both for your group and Stray Kids

You barely paid attention to their words, hyper focused on how close your hand was to the Jisung’s, you could feel the heat radiating off it

One tiny shift and your pinkies would be intertwined, another small shift, and you’d comfortably fold your hand into his

Your hand twitched a little at the thought, so desperate to follow through on your desires but ultimately stopping short

You couldn’t do it, you made up excuses for yourself, he hasn’t given any clear indication he likes you, the dreaded dating ban. Not that you followed all the rules, but this one was just too convenient

When you left your daze Jisung was staring at you and once you made eye contact he reached for your hand folding it into his own

Your heart jumped, did this mean what you thought it meant ?

“Can I speak to you?” you saw a small flash of pink dust his cheeks, “privately”

Your heart lurched again as you nodded, not breaking eye contact

He dragged you into a dressing room and stood in front of you, this time holding both your hands

“I wanted to take a moment to congratulate you, personally. You were amazing. I mean, I couldn’t take my eyes off you. You were mesmerising,” he grinned, and you smiled back, your heart swelling with each word.

“I’m so proud of all you’ve accomplished already, and it’s only the beginning”

Meanwhile, the group were placing bets as to why Jisung pulled you into another room, he wasn’t exactly subtle

“They’re definitely gonna bone?” Minho deadpanned

“Ew gross, they’re not gonna do that”, exclaimed Mihi

“No I agree, Jisung’s too much of a chicken, probably hasn’t even kissed her,” Changbin teased

Felix then chimed in, “it’s weird he’d go for Y/N. I was always under the impression Nam-Gli would be more his type”

“Please,” she dismissed Felix’s claim, “I want someone who can take care of me, I’ve already got my hand full raising these four”

“What about Y/N?” Chan frowned

“She’s an equally stressed parent” Nam-Gil smiled and the group laughed

Back in the dressing room, Jisung continued, “I can’t wait to see my best friend grow and become even more famous!”

Wuhoh, ‘best friend’ your brain wouldn’t stop repeating the word, it packed onto it and refused to let go

Jisung regretted it as soon as he said it, it felt so wrong, it made his stomach churn

You managed a weak smile and replied, “thank you so much,” you slipped your hands from Jisung’s warm hold, “we should probably head back and all go home. It’s late, I don’t want the girls to think I’m doing anything weird”

“Oh yes, totally, this was just a casual conversation between best friends,” Jisung really couldn’t stop himself. He had no idea what else to say, my crush? A conversation between two people who could possibly grow to have a long and beautiful relationship? Maybe start a family that spans a generation, with each child being more successful than the previous?

At least ‘best friend’ wouldn’t freak her out as much he thought

‘Best friend’ that infernal title was stuck with you all the way to your bed, nagging you and telling you we're stupidly misinterpreting the signals. He was just being friendly

Soon you fell into a flat dreamless sleep

When Jisung got back instead of sleeping, he looked up his and your name again. On TikTok, YouTube, everything. He found several edits that made him smile a little

Twitter, however, made him blush the most, it was filled with playful ‘wish he looked at me like that’ followed by screenshots of his staring at you in joint lives

Others were from the video filmed of his group's reactions to your comeback. The tweets talked about how absolutely whipped he looked for you, mostly with, ‘we all know who that look’s for ;)’ and ‘jiy/n dating when?’ comments

Part of him hoped you’d see these and know, he didn’t mean that he only wanted to be best friends but the other hopped to god you didn’t see them to save him the embarrassment

He fell asleep to an edit of the two of you with the classic sickly love song played in the background

You weren’t able to see Jisung as often as you had previously, the comeback schedule was gruelling, but perhaps it was for the better

At least not seeing him meant you didn’t have to hear ‘best friend’ emerge from his lips and painfully lodge itself inside your heart

Jisung, however, couldn’t help but feel upset. Every time he saw you his heart filled with a strange mix of pride and adoration with an insufferable anxiety because why were you only just texting him back it’s been an hour?

Your comeback schedule kept you too busy for Jisung’s liking. He understood, he really did, but after the so dubbed ‘best friend’ incident he was constantly on edge seeing you

Maybe ‘best friend’ did freak you out and your comeback was nothing but a perfectly convenient excuse to ignore him

You sat on a raised bench behind three of your bandmates in between the other two, there was no missing you

Each of one of you was given a pointer for your ‘most likely to’ game

You enjoyed some fun ones like, “who’s most likely to stack it on a night out?” “who would not realise they stayed up all night because they were too busy playing video games?” etc.

It was hilarious getting to know new things about your members you never would have before

When the next question got asked, you froze, ‘most likely to fall in love with someone from another group?’

Act natural you thought as everyone pointed at you

You tried to diffuse some of your nerves by delaying your point for comedic effect, the MC laughed, so it must have worked a little

“Me?” you mock gasped, “I would never!” all the members laughed, and you chuckled along with them

“Oh, are you sure?” Yuri teased, “it seems exactly like something you’d do”

“In all seriousness is it?” the MC asked

“I mean, if it happens, it happens” your heart skipped a beat thinking of one person in particular. “I’d like to say, I’m aware our group's dating ban isn’t over yet, so I wouldn’t do anything I’m not supposed to. Besides, feelings aren’t always reciprocated” you ended with a bittersweet smile

Feeling the tension you left in the air, you spoke up again, “unless of course your Yuri, who responds to so much fan mail she can barely keep up,” you smiled brightly

Yuri blushed to the backdrop of all the members laughing, “aww don’t be embarrassed, it’s cute” you smiled again, and she shyly smiled back with the rest of the members giving small chuckles at the interaction

Jisung had finally decided on something to occupy his time with.

He had been working on lyrics to a new song

The frustration that came with the “best friend” incident gave him a sick sort of inspiration, making him want to write his feelings into song

One song was about how one person can make you want to be the best version of yourself while the other, he imagined, as a sort of sister track to your comebacks b-side track

He quickly looked up from his notebook to his phone, still pinging with a notification

He picked it up immediately, hoping it was a text from you

Sadly it was just a YouTube notification for your group’s newest video

He was curious and couldn’t stop himself from clicking the notification and watching the video

He laughed a couple of times thinking how he would have probably picked the same members having known them for so long

All of a sudden, all the pointers are on you

The answer to the question sparked hope in Jisung, if you were most likely to get with someone from another group he could shoot his shot

Perhaps the “best friend” incident was long forgotten, but his heart wrenched when he heard your response

To him, it was clearly aimed and didn’t miss

As a result he decided to drop hints like Hansel and Gretel dropped crumbs in your next vlive hopping the trail would lead you to his true feelings

He started the live before you came in so the two of you could get right to it, and he could have your usual alone time with you quicker

You walked into his dorm room with heavy steps

You’d rushed over after recording the relay dance for the B-side track and were exhausted, but you really couldn’t miss this opportunity. You hadn’t properly interacted with fans in weeks

Jisung noticed immediately and asked if you were okay. You just tiredly looked at him and sat down with a lopsided smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes

You didn’t want to admit in front of fans that you were exhausted

Jisung noticed and did the first thing he could think of to distract the fans

“Where's my hug?” he pouted, and you looked at him confused

Jisung continued his half serious pout, “I really wanted a hug but since you won’t give me one I’ll have to take it!” he grinned and quickly wrapped you up tightly in his arms

“Jisung come on, let go,” you lightly chuckled

“Nope, I’m not letting go until you hug me back,” Jisung proudly stated

You rolled your eyes smiling and wrapped your arms around his neck burying your head in it, and he did the same

You breathed in his scent and whispered in his ear, “I feel a lot less tired now, thank you” then pulled away and smiled

“You happy now?” You teased out loud

Jisung’s heart beat so fast in his chest the rest of his body couldn’t seem to keep up, but he smiled nonetheless

He started at you and gave you a killer grin, “I’m always happy when you’re around”

It was your heart's turn to explode. You bit your lip and turned round to the screen seeing the comments full off, ‘ew guys get a room’ with Jisung quickly replying that they’re already in one making your eyes go wide

He then quickly and expertly changed the topic asking how everyone was and what they were up to, picking out and responding to the ones he managed to catch in the sea of comments

The live went by smoothly, and you noticed Jisung would bump your hand with his every so often almost like he wanted to take your hand, god you wanted him to take your hand

He pulled away to switch the song that he’d put it on in the background and carried on talking to the fans

You really tried to stay in the conversation, but you zoned out singing along to the music under your breath (imagining 2/14 by the band CAMINO)

Jisung noticed and smiled before joining in

You both fell into the rhythm of the music, vocals effortlessly moulding together into a beautiful concert

The fans adored it, with comments of ‘you guys should perform together!’

You smiled at each other and said that maybe one day you’d be able to get it organised

When the live ended, he grasped your hand, fulfilling your deepest want of the moment before leading you away to the sofa when he draped himself over you as soon as you sat down

“You sure you’re okay?” Jisung asked, “you looked absolutely exhausted.” He looked at you with care and sympathy. You replied that you were better now, just tired from filming

He, still draped over you on the sofa, tangled your legs together and asked you to tell him what you’d been up to

You indulged him relaying the events of the day

Jisung didn’t look away for a single moment, his eyes betrayed warmth as he inched closer to you

You drew out the last syllable of your sentence and went silent, looking into Jisung’s eyes

Your breath hitched, and your eyes were half closed as his face closed in on yours. “Ji,” you breathed, “what are you going?” you whispered smiling and glancing at his lips

“Call me that more,” he sighed, looking up from your lips to meet your eyes; a fire just behind his pupils

This was it, it was the moment you’d know Jisung didn’t mean the stupid friend comment, there’s no way you could be friends when all he wants to do is kiss you until you were out of breath

There’s no way he could only be friends with you when he wants to nip chains of bruises down your collarbone

There’s no way he could only be friends when he wanted you to rake your hands through his hair

Time slowed to a crawl, you were in a parallel universe where time didn’t move and the consequences of a kiss didn’t matter

A parallel universe with just the two of you, no company, no toxic fans, nothing that would get in the way of your affection for one another; where your connection wouldn’t be denied but accepted and encouraged

You focused on his lips, and you felt his searing breath on your lips

He was so close, you were impatient

Before you could launch yourself at him, you heard a sharp knock on the door

The two of you threw yourselves at opposite ends of the sofa as the voice that belong to the knock said “I’m coming in”

The door opens, revealing a mildly annoyed Minho “are you coming or did you forget?”

Jisung stared at him blankly, you could see the cogs moving in his brain, and he yelled apologies

He shot up from the couch, and you knew this was your cue to leave

You walked to the door but were stopped by Jisung who wrapped his arms around you and quickly whispered “I’ll see you soon”

Your lips were still blazing on the way back to your dorm

Your members were enjoying their free time by watching a new drama on Netflix as you walked through the door

You took off, your shoes and sat down next to Aera on the arm of the sofa

Everyone turned to face you and Nam-Gli asked, “So how was it?”

You gulped and yelled, “such a normal time!”

“Why are you being weird?” Yuri asked, eyeing you up suspiciously

“I’m not being weird, you're being weird,” you rapidly released the words

“Very chill response,” Yuri responded in a flat tone, “now tell us what happened”

“Me and Ji- we,” you took a deep breath, “we nearly kissed. Minho interrupted. Turns out he had to go to an event but forgot about it”

You looked away as they yelled in surprise

“What are you gonna do when you see him next? You guys have another vlive in about two weeks, don't you?” Mihi asked

“Honestly, I don’t think I can face him after this. What am I supposed to say? ‘Let's continue where we left off?’” you grimaced

“YES,” Yuri yelled, “just get together already! Do not use the dating ban excuse, I know for a fact you couldn't care less”

The two of you argued about the importance of the dating ban, with you trying to defend yourself because ‘it’s not just an excuse’

“Okay, we get it you disagree,” Nam-Gli quelled the fire. “How about you give yourself until your next vlive together to see him? That way you can put it out of your mind?”

You nodded, grateful for her intervention, you relaxed and continued watching the drama with the rest of the group

You woke up feeling refreshed until you remembered why you wanted sleep to refresh you

Your heart started racing, remembering the events of the last day, and you couldn’t help but smile

There was hope after all

Be quickly the hope turned to anxiety, the dating ban was still in effect and would be for another few weeks, and you promised fans you and Jisung would perform together

That meant weeks of working closely with him every day after the two of you nearly kissed

You took out the switch you’d saved up for a booted up Legend of Zelda, hoping it would distract you, and it worked for a couple of hours

You finally found one of Links missing memories and as the cut scene played it was strangely captivating

Usually you would have skipped over it, having played this game to completion several times already. But something about the way Zelda looked at Link was familiar

You couldn’t help it when you reached for the phone you had been religiously ignoring since waking up

You clicked on his contact, seeing only one unread message when you expected more: ‘how do you want to pitch a song cover to the company?’

You couldn’t decide if you were relieved or angry that he said nothing about yesterday’s incident

You ignored it for as long as your mind would allow you before you huffed and picked up your phone

You replied with a mostly generic response about how the fans really wanted it and it would give both of your groups exposure

The two of you texted back and forth until you had a plan of action and before long you decided to meet with the company in a couple days as Jisung already managed to set up a meeting with the execs somehow

Overall the conversation was painfully professional. Neither of you cracked any jokes or referenced your favourite shows. It was so unlike you

Despite all of this you still hoped, he set up the meeting way too quickly.

Of course there was the possibility he wanted this partnership over with as quickly as possible but there was no way that could be true. Not with the fire behind his eyes when he looked at you

Jisung waited impatiently in the building lobby for you to appear

You hadn’t brought up the nearly kiss at all and he was worried. Did you think he was weird? Maybe he should have waited and dropped more hints. Was he moving too fast?

He nerves stilled when you walked through the door, despite your smile being slightly awkward it made Jisung feel light

“So shall we?” you asked

It was a simple phrase that meant nothing but what was on the tin but it made Jisung soar, he hadn’t heard your voice in longer than you would like

The two of you talked to the executives who loved your idea

Jisung watched as you professionally presented all the benefits this collaboration would have and how this is something that the company would be able to carry on into the future

He wasn’t expecting you to say anything about the future especially after the last incident

As you wrapped up your pitch the execs asked what song the two of you wanted to cover, Jisung hadn’t even thought that far but it seems you had. Immediately with confidence you said ‘PING PONG’ by Hyuna and Dawn

He could feel heat crawl up his face but despite this he still nodded his head and smiled after seeing your own impossibly infectious grin

“Great the matter is settled, you guys can work on it in time for the next award show” one of the execs said with a grin

The next few weeks you and Jisung saw each other every day for at least and hour if not more

Both of you decided to work on learning the choreography first because at you listened to the song to learn the choreography you’d pick up the lyrics easily

As a result your joint lives were mostly updating fans on how the rehearsal process was going

Despite your worst fears the vlives weren’t as awkward as you pictured, the energy flowed between the two of you effortlessly

However, you noticed how where previously he’s have a hand on some part of you body be it you are or your knee, he now refused to have any part of him closer than would be considered disrespectful

You missed his warmth. You were upset because you could tell he was holding himself back

You could imagine why, but it’s not like you pulled away during the incident. In Fact you distinctly remember yourself moving closer, until Miho barged in

Between the bittersweet lives and standing nearly every spare moment practising with Jisung the award show hd rolled around quicker that you expected

For some reason you signed yourself and Jisung up to be the opening act for the award show and regretted it

It hit you that you were supposed to perform a song made for a performed by a couple

Just you and Jisung. Just you and the one person you wished desperately to be in a relationship with but couldn’t

It was all well and good casually running through all the moves in rehearsal but this was serious

You felt nervous as you thought about what the fans would say

Most would not doubt enjoy it but you couldn't help but focus on the ones who believed they owned the idols they admire

All of a sudden you were hyper aware of the dating ban that had ended only a couple days prior

If the two of you were too close it would not doubt cause a scandal

Your mind spiralled as you imagined the headlines calling you undignified, loose, easy

“Hey, you’re gonna do amazing,” were the words that stopped your spiral, they were soft and reassuring. You knew painfully well who they belonged to

You took a deep breath and looked Jisung in the eye and he smiled

It made you insides melt and you were certain he could see it on you face because his eyes darted to you lips for a split second

You recalled how close he was to kissing you in his dorm room and once again thought back to the dating ban

If it was finished surely there was no harm right?

“Yeah, we’re gonna smash this,” you smiled back. “We’ve rehearsed this song so much it might as well have been made for us to perform,” you joked begging no one noticed the implications of your statement

Jisung only hummed and his eyes looked to your lips once again, this time they stayed there for longer than they should have

You licked your lips gently, part of you wanting to make sure they were ready for Jisung to capture them after so long

The other knew it wouldn’t happen as you saw the PA approach to tell you you were on in less than three minutes

Just like in the original you started off the show, the train attached to the right side of your body suit swayed along with your body

You felt confident and full of energy until you felt Jisung’s hand trail all the way up your leg confidently brushing your ass

Thankfully you were facing away from the audience allowing you time to collect yourself

You knew this would be more intense than rehearsals but you didn’t expect Jisung to go this hard

It fired you up and you decided to give it your all as well

Jiung could feel the heat crawl up his face as you shake your ass dangerously close to his crotch

He couldn’t help but smirk as you bit your lip looking him directly in the eye as if to challenge him

He eagerly accepted and the while performance had a push and pull effect to it

The two of you goaded each other on stage testing the waters every time your faces got too close to be called innocent

The built up tension culminated in Jisung dipping you and you holding his face in you hand ready for him to bend don and kiss you as the song ended

The two of you stayed in that position with massive grins on your faces until you couldn’t hold it anymore and Jisung pulled you up and you buried you face i your neck as he laughed and waved at cheering crowd

Once you recovered your turned around and waved at them as well smiling widely

Jisungs hand never left your waist

The two of you left the stage and you shot like a bullet towards Yuri who was silently screaming and telling you how good you were

Chan came up to Jisung and clapped him on the back but Jsiung couldn’t keep his eyes off you

He knew this was the moment to tell you. He was sure you must have known but he still gave you your space

He couldn’t lie and say he was entirely confident, there was a part of him that was worried because you hadn’t made any moved

But he had to tell you

Jisung walked over to you still smiling and took you hand in his, “can I talk to you, privately?” you glanced at Yuri who nodded and gave you a knowing look

“Sure,” you replied, content with your hand in his. You could get used to this you thought

He lead you towards a dressing room and closed the door behind you

You basked in each others presence just looking at each other

“You really went for it didn’t you?” you questioned with a smile

“Sorry, was it too much?” Jisung answered taking several steps closer to you

“No,” you breathed out, “it was perfect.”

You stayed still for a moment and Jisung admired the grin on your face

The silence was comfortable and electric, calm and expectant

“I really hope I haven’t misinterpreted things but I really like you-”

You cut Jisung off before he could say more, “I know. I really like you too,” you trailed off

“But?” Jisung asked with a mixture of hurt and frustration. If you liked each other what could possibly be stopping you?

“But, I’m not sure we should do anything right now. My dating ban’s only just been lifted and I don’t want to make things more difficult for either of us” you explained

Jisung was ready to argue, he was ready to present every piece of evidence that supported the two of you dating but this wasn't one he had prepared for

Much to his dismay he couldn’t argue with you on that point

Whatever happened he knew, that he would come out unscathed but you on the other hand. Well it would be a lot harder for you

His mouth opened and closed as you apologised before leaving him in the room alone with his thoughts

You gulped and went to perform your groups stage, you put on a show for the cameras and tried not to betray heartache in your eyes

Jisung did the same he finished his group’s stage and after neither of your groups won this particular award he went home disappointed

The rest of the members were getting slightly worried for him, exchanging glances

Minho ended up sitting down next to him on the sofa of their dorm

“I’m guessing talking about your feelings didn’t go well?” he asked tentatively

Jisung choked out a ‘no’ and repeated your exact reasoning

“That’s bullshit,” Minho stated

Jisung stared at him shocked, waiting for him to explain

“Sure dating is terrifying but hiding behind the dating ban is nothing but an excuse,” Minho expended

Jisung replied with his reasoning and Minho refused every claim

Jisung bit his lip, “ok well it’s not like I can do anything now,” he explained how he’d agreed and you would have to be the one who comes to him and tell him you’re ready

But Minho frustrated mumbled something under his breath and left

Thanks to your stellar performance the company said you and Jisung can have a break from your activities, that included your collective vlives, much to your relief

You couldn't imagine facing Jisung after what you told him. Not to mention you had already had an argument with Yuri about what you’d told Jisung

It was much the same as always; Yuri telling you to stop hiding behind the dating ban and you trying to explain you weren’t hiding behind it and this is the ebay option for everyone

You reached for yet another tib of ice cream hoping it would stop you from wanting to text Jisung

Any thought of him was painful but what was more painful was being apart

You missed your vlives, you missed hanging out with him after them, you missed the way his body melted into yours when he was draped over you on the sofa

Jisung tried taking his mind off the situation but nothing worked, not properly

Instead he dived back into work and finished the song he started all those months ago

At least this way he could work through his feelings

He frantically scribbled lyrics rewriting them to fit the beat of your bride track

He wanted the two songs to be connected even though the two of you couldn’t