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conellu · 1 year

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My Heart’s A Rabid Dog Trying To Put It’s Teeth In You

Yoshikage Kira x Reader

Briefly mentioned: Koichi/Reader (platonic), Rohan/Reader (platonic/romantic)

Canon Divergent AU

Soulmate AU

Also Posted Here

You didn't hate him, you couldn't hate him, he was your soulmate after all. Whatever you did to deserve such a vile soulmate in a past life, you decided, had to be absolutely despicable.

You hated him.

You repeated the sentence in your head over and over again as you watched him loom closer, eyes fixed sharp on you in a way that made you regrettably feel warm. You didn't hate him, you couldn't hate him, he was your soulmate after all. Whatever you did to deserve such a vile soulmate in a past life, you decided, had to be absolutely despicable. He wore a warm, faint smile as he gently grasped your hands and pressed a gentle kiss against your cheek. Your stomach erupted into butterflies despite your anger towards the gesture, face blushing as though you were kissed by someone who wasn't a monster.

He hummed as he collected the dishes, glasses, and silverware, content with his life while you sat in anger and disgust. Your body screamed at you to join him, to be as close to him as possible at all times, he was your soulmate after all. Your stand had made occasional appearances tonight, as per usual, as your soul did not care that the man you were fated to be with was a monster - someone who destroyed countless families and lives for his own selfish gain. Your stand mingled with Killer Queen, evaporating into nothing every time you got a hold of yourself.

You stared daggers into the back of his head as though by spite alone he would die and you could leave, no longer bonded to him. It would be a lonely life, your soul would call out for his until your own death, leaving you to cry and whine at night. But, you thought, that would be a more tolerable life than the one you were living now. Unfortunately, soulmates could not hurt each other. This was the only reason Yoshikage Kira had let you live. Part of you wishes he coduld have killed you, wishes he made your body explode. Maybe you could join Reimi after your death and you could help again, you could fulfill what you wanted to do before meeting his eyes. You could apologize to her and everyone that you got stuck with the one soulmate you wished you never had.

"Now, now dear..." He started, tone edging on parental as though you were just a child and he had to chastise you. "I made sure our dinner was your favorite. Are you upset because I am to find a new girlfriend tonight?" His stupid smirk was audible, fueling your disgust and hatred for the man. "Are you jealous?" He asked, turning towards you. he leaned against the sink as he took in your facial expressions, revealing nothing but spite and hatred for him. He supposed it couldn’t be helped, after all you did have to witness Sheer Heart Attack render Jotaro nearly dead (you thought at the time he was dead, Kira correcting you during one of your many breakdowns) and him repeatedly slam Koichi’s head into the ground. Even though that had been a couple months ago by now and he had made his own progress as accepting you as his fated one.

The sudden eye contact made your heart skip a beat, regardless of your own hate for the man your soul ached for him. Of course you were jealous, deep within you, you craved to be his only. The feeling made you sick to your stomach and he knew it. He knew that despite your utter, deep hatred for him that you loved him. Despite him being a prick, seeming to get enjoyment out of toying with you, he didn’t enjoy the sitation at hand. You didn't have a choice and, to be frank, neither did he.

He wasn't extremely pleased with the situation either, anxiety and anger had pooled in him soon after he met your eyes. His world burst into color and he knew he was screwed. Soulmates cannot hurt each other, so he was unable to use Killer Queen on you. Even the idea made him feel upset, despite his initial want to make your existence disappear. Living each and every day with an empty pit in his stomach, his being calling out for you in a pitiful attempt to bring you back, did not sound very pleasing to him. In spite of it all, his anxiety and anger disappeared rather smoothly. When he strung you along to his house, your body light in his arms, he assessed the situation fully. He was, in a perverted way, living the life that many wanted. Few people connected with their soulmates at his age, not to say that 33 was old but most of his peers had long since met theirs well before their 30s. He had gave up hope around the time he hit 27 of finding his soulmate, perhaps he already killed them before realizing what he had done or they died in some other situation. But to meet your soulmate and immediately be able to live with them? That was unheard of, regardless of the draw that two fated lovers feel towards each other there were common practices they would have to go through before living together typically.

Life at home was a sadistic imitation of a domestic life, you stayed in the house and made sure everything was clean, put away, and ready for him while he worked. He would come home to a clean house and to you, his dear soulmate. He would give you a kiss on the cheek before going to work and upon coming home, your stands would greet each other as though they had been apart for longer than a few hours. You would ask him how work was, inform him of what was for dinner (unless, of course, he had to get a new girlfriend, then he would fix dinner for you), and sit in relative silence until bedtime. Your nighttime routines entangled each other with ease, of course you didn't have much to do given the fact you were away from home and your belongings so you had little choice but to bend to his routine. While you two did sleep in the same bed, you curled up under your own set of blankets as far away from him as possible. Without fail, you would wake up clutching onto him and before you were able to process that you were, in fact, disgusted with your soulmate you would nuzzle into his neck and inhale his scent, smile against him and plant soft, barely there kisses. To be honest, the mornings had become Kira's favorite time of day rather quickly. Before he knew it, he considered it part of his routine and looked forward to it subconsciously. Before he could reciprocate, or even tighten his arms around your form in a burst of extreme pleasure to his soul, you would yank yourself away and get up, starting on the day's routine as he lay and watch you for a few seconds.

You also were not a bad sight, before your eyes connected he had thought your form was cute, even if you were just a roadblock in his way, though he had since chalked this up to his soul knowing you were fated to be before he knew it. Your hands were nothing amazing, had it not been for you two being fated he likely would not have gave them a second glace. Overall, Kira thought as he observed your cheeks start to darken with a blush at the eye contact and softening of his feature, it was as close to a perfect, quiet life he had ever experienced and he was certain that soon enough you would stop. You would give into what you soul craved, you would accept that you and him were fated to be together, fated to protect each other and take care of one another. You would, in time, complete the final step to his ideal quiet life, giving in to your urge to dote on him. It was not simple wishful thinking on his part, nor was it delusion. Soulmates would always end up warming up to each other if there was any animosity, there were a few books released by couples who experienced a hard time accepting each other at first before they realized there was no use in fighting fate.

"As if," you said, looking away from the man. You could feel your cheeks burn bright as his expression softening as he looked at you, the urge to stand up and peck his cheek and smile at him nearly winning you over. "You disgust me, Yoshikage Kira." Your eyes focused on a flower pot as you chewed at your bottom lip, you could feel him still staring at you and it made your cheeks burn even hotter as embarrassment flooded over you. You were certain he loved toying with you more than he loved nearly anything else. It would be a lie to say that hearing his full name grace your lips didn't start a fire in him, a mix of arousal and anger burying itself deep within him. Your whines for him, whimpers of his name, replayed in his head without a second thought.

You two have had sex before, of course you had. You were soulmates, after all, and in close proximity often enough that sometimes you had to satiate yourself. It would never take long for either of you to cum, your fingers lazily in his mouth as he pounded into you with a grip on your throat. You would clinch around him soon after he would slip in, your slick pooling in your panties before he so much as got near you and either of you even initiated sex. His orgasm would come soon after, suckling and licking at your digits in his mouth while your other hand lay against his cheek in a show of absolute affection, absolute adoration. After having sex you would cry, he would leave the room to take a shower as your sat on the bed in disbelief at yourself. Sometimes you would throw up, so disgusted with yourself that you would be late getting into bed. Kira didn't reprimand you on those nights for straying from routine, allowing you to have time to yourself to digest what you did, things you said, your soft touches against his skin as though you loved him as much as you would proclaim at the height of your orgasm. Sometimes he would fall asleep before you returned, other times he would lay awake and wait on you despite his best efforts to fall asleep. You would come to bed, shaky and exhausted, falling asleep soon after pulling your blankets tight around you as though you would disappear if you could squeeze them around you right enough. The sight was enough to make his chest clinch even before he had fully accepted your combined fate, his body demanding that he comfort your sleeping form in some way. He would sigh and throw an arm over you, pulling you closer to him and burying his nose against your hair. The first time he did this, it felt as though his body was acting on its own accord as he thought your behavior was annoying, but after he felt you relax against him in your sleep he did not want to let go. His body wanted to protect you from whatever it was that was causing you distress even when that thing was him.

You would think about they would think, what would they say. You could see their faces clearly, disgusted with you. You could practically head their exclamations of disgust, of hatred, of betrayal towards you. Not just for being so foolish as to allow Kira Yoshikage to be so close to you, not just for you being too pathetic to get help (not that you could, your entire being was dedicated to keeping him safe and his being was dedicated to keeping you safe. You had, on multiple occasions, picked up the phone to call someone to beg them to help you but you could not make your fingers move to dial), but for saying that you love him. That you love the monster that took away so many lives before you, that continued to take away lives as you lived together, that took away Reimi's life. You would sit hunched over a trash can while Kira took a shower and throw up until your throat burnt. If he exited the shower before you were finished admonishing yourself for a sin you were fated to commit, you would hurry behind him into the bathroom, head down and eyes filled with tears that dropped to the floor below you. You would stare at yourself in the mirror until you could no longer recognize your reflection as a face and saw it as just a collection of mishpas, misdeeds, mistakes that lead you to having Yoshikage as a soulmate. You would apologize out loud to your friends, beg their forgiveness and plead with them. You knew they couldn't hear you, of course, you knew the only being that could hear you besides yourself was Yoshikage who was sitting on the bed, warm glass of milk in hand and stealing glances towards the bathroom. He wouldn't say anything, what could he say that you didn't already tell yourself. Speaking up in this moment would likely result in you becoming even more broken as your inner battle to run to him, to accept his words and touches, would be even harder. Despite his own distain for the situation intially, he had grown to enjoy it when it was running more smoothly.

"Is that so, my dear?" Kira spoke lowly, taking his place back at the table across from you. You couldn't bare to look at him, knowing that if he held the same soft expression so close to you that you might slip up, you might allow yourself to indulge in the smallest affection toward the man.

Truthfully, you hadn't found the man unattractive physically. He was conventionally attractive, his voice like honey in your ears when he first talk before the battle began which caused an automatic shiver to run up your spine (which was, thankfully, undetected by the frantic Koichi because you couldn't dare have him even slightly pick up on the slight waver that graced your stance before you turned to face Yoshikage). Had he been someone different you would have unabashedly ask him to talk about anything and everything, his voice swimming around you and bringing you comfort despite the venomous words he spouted towards your short friend.

The memory of your eyes meeting kept you up some nights, still feeling like some unending nightmare. You watched as Koichi was beat within a centimeter of his life, stand unable to effect the adult man as he pummeled your younger friend. The scent of blood barraged your nose as you cried out, begging Koichi to get up, begging Kira to stop, begging Jotaro to get up, begging for anything to change. When he directed his eyes towards you snarling at your whimpering and whining and crying, time felt as though it stood still. The world exploded with color and your mouth was slightly agape as your eyes widened. His face changed in a similar way, snarl disapating into a confused stare with eyes staying transfixed on yours. You shook your head no in absolute disbelief, this had to be a nightmare. You were frozen with fear as he came closer to you, eyebrows furrowed in confusion and a sharp frown. Were you going to die? Have the shit beat out of you? Were you going to explode as Shigekiyo had? Could he even hurt you? You had heard that soulmates are supposed to protect each other, but as Killer Queen loomed over his shoulder- it's eyes boring holes into your own stand, you thought that maybe that was just some lie. You should have ran, should have ran and ran and ran away until you found Josuke and Okuyasu, telling them the grim reality of everything that just transpired. But you stayed, as still as a mouse that had gave up a chase. His hand gripped your arm forcefully, right enough for you to whimper and draw your eyes away from his, down to your arm. He jerked you up easily, your legs automatically straighting to catch yourself from stumbling. You didn't say anything and neither did he as you both seemed to consider your next move, to consider each other's next move. He moved with you roughly before you could pull away, dragging you from the sight with an angry sigh and slight glance down at you. "I can't hurt you," he said angerly, "so you have to come with me."

His words made your brain go into overdrive, suddenly all to aware of what he meant, of his grasp on you, of the fact you were fated to be together. You yanked away from him, breath shaky as you tried to fight back the urge to cry and scream and collapse into an anxiety attack. He had his blood, Koichi's, on him. A fact that made your actions even more feverish in an attempt to break away from his grasp. "No." You said, barely above a whisper. No to what exactly, you were not sure. No to the entire situation was what you decided on upon replaying the memory in your head. No to Jotaro seemingly dead, no to seeing your friend being beat and left in a heap on the ground, no to realizing how bad your soul wanted to grab onto Kira and wanted to never let go, no to realizing that you failed and that you could never win. Even if you had been separated, your body would know rest until you gave in. Even if Josuke and Okuyasu had got there before that you would have betrayed them without intending to. Your stand would have made its life goal to protect your fated lover, acting without your input and acting purely on what your soul wanted.

His grasp didn't falter as he walked with you, eyes going between the road ahead and down at your form. Your head was down, tears threatening to spill over as your hand that wasn't connected to the arm he had a grasp on grabbed tightly onto your shirt. Your knuckles ached with how tight you grasped your fabric, but you couldnt let it go, knowing that if you did your hand would reach out and over to him. He led you to his house without too much of a fight on your end, your stand would disobey any command that you struggled out through quivering lips and your body so tired with today's events. To say annoyance radiated off of his body would have been an understatement, he was furious at how today went.

You mind raced as you realized you wouldnt be going home, you wouldn’t be allowed the pleasure of gathering your belongings. You couldn’t collect the many photograpghs that adorned your wall of your friends. You had considered Rohan your unofficial soulmate, a title he sneered at but appreciated all the same, despite his demeanor towards you, you two connected on a level you hadn't done with anyone before. You never sent a title on what you were, if you were anything more than just friends or something more, but you enjoyed his company (and he would never admit but he felt the same). But the heat that rushed towards your face, butterflies that blew up in your stomach, and the urges you felt towards to serial killer of Morioh blew it out of the water as soon as your eyes met again as he led you into his house and sat at the table. This was the first time throw up raced towards your throat, you felt like a lovesick puppy just in his presence and he viseably relaxed despite the thoughts racing through his head.

He hated to admit it and would never vocalize it out loud, even after he came to terms with his fated life partner, but in that moment he wanted to kiss you. His soul ached to cradle you as your blood shot eyes looked up at him, despite knowing that he himself was the cause for your distress. Finding your soulmate is supposed to be a joyous occasion, both sides experiencing intense euphoria and elation at the feeling but both of you were experiencing none of that. You looked younger than him, you had to be younger than him of course if you were so close to Koichi that you cried for him as though he was your own brother. He would later ask how old you are, a question you answered while finishing dinner one night after he had a shift at work. He didn’t understand why he would have you as a soulmate, but with the day he was having before your eyes met, he wasn’t shocked that one of the bratty sleuthers was his beloved.

Kira jars you out of your memories with a "hm?" as he reaches across the table to gently hold your hands. He holds them as they you are a porcelain doll and will shatter, rubbing his thumbs ever so softly across your knuckles. For a second your body relaxed, your soul at ease at your fated lover's affection, you nearly smiled before you pulled them away. He held a small grin on his face, today had been the most you’ve let your facade drop and he figured it wouldn’t be long until you couldn’t muster it anymore. You would greet him happily at the door instead of looking away, a genuine interest in how his day went (though nearly every day was the exact same, you would be excited to hear regardless), you would allow yourself to touch him, your soft hands caressing his face so lovingly.

"Yes." You say, arms now folded across your chest as you tried to stare him down. The action doesn't phase him and it doesn't work on your end, the eye contact making you feel a mix of emotions. He stands up and you rise from your seat as well following him as he goes to the door, an action you do of your own accord. You look up at him, breath getting stuck in your throat as you realize he's leaving and will be coming back with a pair of dismembered hands and he'll keep them until they start to stink. You tell yourself this is why you hate it when he leaves on nights like this and not that it's because you will miss his presence. He leans down, pressing a kiss against your lips and holds your shoulders as he looks at you. For a moment, your facade drops. Your hands hold his face so gently, so sweetly, so perfectly that has he not required a new girlfriend he would have leaned into greedily, taking advantage of your mask falling off. Your eyes soften and you press your own chaste kiss against his lips. Your eyes widen just like they did the first time you made eye contact with him, shocked at your own movements as though they were controlled.

"I love you," he says, pulling away from your touch, "I'll be back before bedtime." And he opens the door and leaves before you could respond with anything. Your fingers gently touch your lips as you watch him leave. You know you should go get a shower, but you cannot move. His shadowy figure disappears as he goes on the prowl for a new victim leaving you fully alone with your thoughts. You forced your legs to move to the bathroom, trying to focus on one thought at a time but it was impossible. Your thought swarmed with him, with your kiss, with how placid his appearance looked as your thumb caressed his cheek despite what he intended to do after he left, with anger and disgust towards yourself and towards him.

#my writing #jjba x reader #x reader #kira yoshikage x reader #kira yoshikage #yoshikage kira #diamond is unbreakable #jjba part 4 #part 4 #oneshot #probably ooc but started as self indulgent smut so its fine #will be a series eventually #Kira's my secondary f/o but he lends so much better to my self indulgent fics than doppio #reader is between koichi and Kira's age i put her as 23 in my head cause thats my age lol #which is an age gap ig but also the kind i seek out irl soooooooooo

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