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#here’s the king Mr Hippo
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FNAF movie Mike and Vanessa meet Mr.Hippo
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matchamabs · 8 months
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actually i might as well post these bc some of u out there may find em funny. fucking post cropping does my nut in tho
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ohshy · 8 months
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more punch out headcanons
- I imagine every circuit has a person who tries to be friends or atleast on good terms w/ everyone. For the minor circuit it's Disco Kid, for the major circuit it's Bear Hugger, and for the world circuit it's Soda Popinski.
- Disco kid's very good at figure skating. He’s currently teaching SMM how to do it, with mixed results. Macho, like Doc has commented, can spin very well, but his landings leave a lot to be desired. Macho freaks out every time he does, afraid he'll ruin his pearly whites.
- So-called free thinkers (Glass Joe) when la Marseille starts playing
- SMM was born into a rich family. As a kid, he was able to practice any hobby he wanted to. Boxing was one he happened to have the most talent for. Like Macho Man, Disco Kid comes from riches as well. Unlike Macho man, however, Disco is as nice as can be, but doesn't take boxing as seriously.
- King hippo being 6 plus foot atleast + big n muscular as hell + resting bitch face + deep voice = accidentally intimidates people all the time. The funny thing is, however, he's actually the runt of his family. His ma n pop are 7 foot and 7'5 foot respectively
- The reason poor Von Kaiser is as traumatized as he is, is due to severe bullying at school because of his tics. that’s what happened in the slideshow; his trauma triggered from kids laughing at him.
- Von Kaiser 🤝 Piston Hondo being bullied as kids over their tics
- King Hippo? More like King AUTISM
- Bear Hugger knows a lot about survival in the wild, and loves camping out. Once, he invited the whole WVBA on a big camping trip. Big mistake, several people (namely SMM, Aran Ryan and Don Flamenco) littered, used a ton of ozone unfriendly sprays to get rid of bugs and were either disgusted by (SMM and Don flamenco) or pestering (Aran Ryan) the animals. As a result of this fiasco, he only invites trusted people on his camping trips anymore.
- Piston Honda's dad is a poet, and taught his son all about all kinds of japanese proverbs, which is why Honda's always reciting them during intermissions.
- SMM’s crowd, when they’re not booing him or throwing produce at him, sometimes sing the song ‘’Macho Man’’ by the Village People at him. Why? Because it's funny and they're doing it ironically. SMM is completely unaware of this though; he thinks they're admiring him.
- SMM often hosts ''Best Circuit'' parties for the world circuit. Bald Bull and Mr. Sandman will stand in the corner awkwardly watching the others dance, while Aran and Soda absolutely KILL it on the dance floor. Aran will also often embarrass Macho in front of ladies he's trying to flirt with.
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fan-mans · 11 months
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Punch out wii but make it pride
Or gender and sexuality headcanons for the lads cause it's pride month lmao.
{Note that these are not my only headcanons, just the ones I stick to most often. Yes, i have imagined everyone as trans already :P. }
Glass Joe:
Bi and Trans.
Struggled with a lot of internalized biphobia after his transition and is only now accepting his attraction to men as a man.
Very happy with his transition and is currently considering bottom surgery. However, the endocrinologist that works with the WVBA is abusive and refuses to dose his T properly. This has left him stuck not only without his hormones for transition, but left him very sick due to his naturally low T levels. No one knows he's trans and he has no idea.
Von Kaiser:
He's pretty out of the loop when it comes to labels so he doesn't use them. The best label for him would probably be Grey Aroace, with no gender preference when he has had crushes.
As for his gender, he generally considers himself cis but is very relaxed about being called she/her and interacting with femininity, which has made him question himself a little.
Disco Kid:
Gay gay homosexual gay. He is, in no uncertain terms, not attracted to women. There was a short time where he tried to be attracted to women, until his uncle came out to him and made him feel safe not to be in the closet anymore.
Very feminine and gnc, preferring to be called a 'queen' above all else in relation to his gender. Out and proud (He can't really hide it, lol) and will beat the shit out of anyone who says anything negative about him or the other boxers queerness.
King Hippo:
Aroace king with no desire for anything outside of friendships and family relationships.
Hippo Island culture has 4 genders based on social roles. There's male, female, a third gender that encompasses a mixture of both, and a fourth that does neither. People of this fourth gender not only have the most flexibility in what they can choose to do, but are also free to practice most cultural taboos freely. Hippo is apart of the 4th gender, being comfortable with being labeled as trans and nonbinary, though says he's male to American media. He isn't agender- his gender is part of a social class and should not be conflated with anything else.
Piston Hondo:
As stated in my first headcanon post about him, he finds hard labels restricting. Depending on how he feels on a given day and who he's talking to, he'll call himself queer, gay, bi, and pan- sometimes all within the same conversation. He's very cool with open relationships and is currently enjoying a friends-with-benefits situation with Don and Carmen.
He's dipped his toes in femininity, but it wasn't for him so now he's cis+. He does however, choose to use feminine pronouns in Japanese because he prefers the way they sound.
Bear Hugger:
He's bi with a slight preference for men. He adores his wife, but is always a little heartbroken to tell all the pretty men who swarm him at gay events that he's married.
Cis but not an asshole about it. Very supportive and protective of his trans friends even if he isn't the most knowledgeable about some things.
Great Tiger:
Demi romantic/sexual and only attracted to men when he has developed crushes.
He's been exploring his gender for a little while now and still isn't sure if he's genderfluid or not so he sticks to calling himself gnc.
Don Flamenco:
Struggled with accepting his bisexuality due to his religion for years. When he finally did though, he was much happier and opened his relationship with Carmen. They're cool with just about everything except they have 1 rule- their romantic love is only for each other. Don's the type to fall in love easily, so this was hard on him. However, Carmen is his one and only and has stayed true to her for many years.
Currently, Don is denying his complicated gender feelings. He began suspecting he was bigender but quickly shut it down and has since been trying (And failing) to stuff it down with machismo.
Aran Ryan:
Bi and a trans man.
He comes from a long line of bisexuals, to the point where his parents/grandparents believe everyone is at least a little attracted to multiple genders. Aran has always been open to dating anyone and has no preferences whatsoever, aside from not dating cis people.
His parents and grandma initially rejected him when he came out as trans. After Aran ran away and came back a few years later, they mended their relationships and are now fully supportive. He did some not-so-legal stuff to transition and still gets his T off the black market due to lacking proper medical records and distrusting doctors. The only part of his transition he regrets is getting top surgery. He felt he had no choice in the matter and it put a lot of financial, emotional, and physical strain on him. He's stealth at the moment but wouldn't mind people he trusts knowing.
Soda Popinski:
Gay gay homosexual gay. Due to the Russian government's involvement in his career he can't safely come out. His mother and sister know and are very supportive of him.
He's had some funny gender feelings for a while now, but cannot explore his gender due to the government on his back.
Bald Bull:
Bi but closeted. He knows coming out would cause a shitstorm in the press and hides his sexuality as much as possible. He doesn't know how supportive his family would be were he to come out to them but frankly doesn't care enough about them to do so.
Cis and very respectful of trans people. He used to be more close minded out of confusion more than anything, but has since opened up and become a strong supporter of trans rights both in the US and Turkey.
Super Macho Man:
Aro and pan.
He's uninterested in romance whatsoever and trying to bring up his romantic life will only upset him. He's got a huge polycule of fuckbuddies where everyone is very happy (Macho most of all).
Cis+. He tried being trans for a short time, asking his friends to call him a different name and pronouns but left the situation more affirmed of his gender than anything.
Mr. Sandman:
Switches between calling himself bi and pan, finding both labels useful and important to him in their own ways.
Very gnc in daily life and has labelled himself nonbinary before. Currently considers himself cis as he finds being nonbinary isn't for him.
Little Mac:
Straight and trans.
He figured out his gender young and transitioned as soon as he turned 8- something he and Doc had to fight for hard. He's currently getting back on T after being assured the WVBA would cover it and let him compete on it. He doesn't do well in surgery so can't get top surgery, but he doesn't mind as he enjoys binders and compression tops a lot.
Though he's had crushes on guys, his love for women is more common and intense so he just calls himself straight.
Doc Louis:
Bi but refuses to call himself that. He thinks his relationships with me don't count as they were all either very short or former roommates. He really doesn't think he deserves to call himself bi.
Cis and very supportive of Mac's transition. All he wants is his baby to be happy and he'll accept whatever Mac wants to do for himself.
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strawbs-screaming · 20 days
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punch out rambles because i can and i will
**insert crowd booing sound effect here**
Disco Kid has the most high-pitched, ear grating scream ever, he also tends to go "EEEK!" over a lot of stuff so he tends to absolutely demolish the ears of anyone near him if theyre in his range.
Aran Ryan sometimes starts singing out of nowhere, he usually does this when alone or with people he's close to.
King Hippo is actually decent friends with Glass Joe, joe was scared from him in the beginning but warmed up to him pretty quickly after learning some Hippo language, Joe can hold a basic conversation in Hippo language and sometimes gossips with him.
Mr Sandman tends to shy away from playfighting with others since he almost always ends up hurting someone in the end.
Piston Hondo liked taking apart electronics as a kid since he liked examining them and finding out how they worked, he still has a interest in machinery & electronics but doesn't have much to bother going stuff related to it, he sometimes still takes apart electronic stuff for fun.
Von Kaiser used to be a barber, he was his own test subject and he has fucked up his hair multiple times over that, if anyone in the WVBA wants to do something related to hair, they usually hit up Kaiser.
Don Flamenco had a emo phase where he constantly dyed his hair blue, grew it out to the point where it covered his eyes & wore nothing but the same pair of jeans and band shirts, anytime his parents pull up pictures of that era he jumps back from fear.
Bald Bull unintentionally does that one "moo" sound a lot, he usually does it when hes angry, tired or just relaxing, he tried to not let it slip out often but it still happens sometimes, don't bring it up in front of strangers though.
Soda Popinski use to work in a scam call center, he quit since it kind of took a toll on his sanity because tricking someones grandma into giving you their credit card info can take you so far.
Super Macho Man is usually a reckless dude since he knows he can pay his way out of practically anything and everything.
Bear Hugger can and will eat raw meat, no one has any idea how he still manages to walk it off without a problem.
Great Tiger likes feeding stray cats, he usually sets out a bowl of cat food outside his door to help feed strays, he sometimes lets some cats in and takes care of them.
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Disney Parks Animatronic Tournament Match ups: Round 1
Should start tomorrow!
Bracket A/Tier 1:
Hondo Ohnaka vs Beast
Davy Jones vs Disco Yeti
Lava Monster vs Kylo Ren
Anna (Hong Kong version) vs Mr. Potato Head
Jack Sparrow vs BB8
Stitch vs Hopper
Lumiere vs Sven
Belle and Prince Adam vs Tiana
Stunt Spiderman vs Clawhauser
Wheezy vs Tiki Room Stitch
Rocket Raccoon vs C3PO
Shaman of Songs vs Elsa (Hong Kong version)
Ursula vs Lieutenant Bek
Dragon under castle vs Olaf
Hatbox Ghost vs Lantern Belle
Albert vs Dwarves in Mine Train
Bracket B/Tier 2:
Madame Leota vs Fantasmic dragon/Murphy
Giant from Sinbad's Storybook Voyage vs Swedish Chef
Finale conductor Sebastian vs Big Al
Roger Rabbit vs Br'er Porcupine
Dreamfinder vs Constance Hatchaway
Redd vs Munchkins
Skippy vs DJ R3X
Singing Geese vs 1900 Patricia
Daisy Duck vs Mary Poppins
Trixie vs The Five Bear Rugs
Jack Skellington vs Carnotaurus
Buzz Lightyear vs John
Aladar vs Zazu
RX-24 vs John Wayne
Max, Buff and Melvin vs Teddi Berra
Iago vs Panchito
José vs Uh-oa
Sun Bonnet Trio vs Br'er Raccoon
Figment vs Little Leota
Horned King vs Roz
Malestrom trolls vs Donald Duck
Abraham Lincoln vs Q’aráq
Statler and Waldorf vs Gene Kelly
Marshmallow vs Wicked Witch of the West
Will Rogers Jr/Lasso cowboy vs ExtraTERRORestrial Alien
Farming bunnies vs Frank
Timekeeper vs VR Grandma
Luggage Scanner Droids vs Railway end Mickey
Scuttle vs Bean Bunny
S.I.R.(Tim Curry robot) vs Liver Lips Mcgrowl
Buzzy vs Phantom
Ellen Ripley vs Sonny Eclipse
Bracket C/Tier 3:
Hitchhiking Ghosts vs Blue Fairy
Mr Bluebird vs Hag with apple
Richard the pineapple vs Sea Serpent
The Muppet Penguin Orchestra vs The Lost Safari
Horizons Robot butler vs Girl with goose
POTC Donkey vs Goat with dynamite
Jessica Rabbit vs Tiki room birds
Evil queen in window vs dancing Ariel
Puffins vs Mickey Mouse Review Alice
Little Red vs Unnamed laundry girl
Computer engineer woman/Foxy vs Indiana Jones snake
Hula Girls vs Disappearing butterfly
Splash Mountain finale chickens vs Sauropod
Tiger with umbrella vs Br'er Fox and Bear end scene
Donald's butt vs Drunk hats stealing pirate
Xenomorph vs Sally
Drew Carey vs Figaro
Rover vs Nemo seagulls
Exercise Patricia vs Tiki room Jose
Rosita vs Small World hippo
Darla vs POTC prison dog
Beating heart bride vs Barnstormer chickens
Boothill Boys/Vultures vs Ballroom dancer ghosts
Pansy, Poppy and Petunia (Splash opossums) vs Pig pirate
"Here kitty kitty" pirate vs Evil queen turns into hag
Skeleton ship pirate vs Small World cowboy
Singing birds of paradise vs Primeval World diorama
Jungle cruise elephants vs Barker Bird
Uncle Orville vs Granny ghost
Carlos' wife vs Energy dinos
Rabbit family with carrot vs jungle cruise hippos
Dirty foot pirate vs FSU gopher
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ghs-imagines · 1 year
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Calling them Baby Girl
Did anyone ask for this, no! But it was inside my brain anyways
Doc: He gets a little flustered but will more or less laugh it off. Might ask if it’s a new form of endearment that the youth have came up with. Will jokingly ask if you are Mac’s father figure now since he’s now just your baby girl.
Glass Joe: This man doesn’t know how to feel about it, on one hand it makes him blush almost as dark as his hair as you see him with such affection but on the other do you really see him as someone to protect? It should be him looking out for you and he will get stronger for you. It honestly depends on what mood he’s in when you call him that.
Von Kaiser: Hates it with every fibre of his being despite what his overly red face tells you. He’s fine with it in private just don’t call him that public he already gets mocked by children, he doesn’t need the rest of the guys to tease him as well.
Disco Kid: Loves it, lives for it even, will call you baby girl right back to your face coz you are just so cute! Like him. Disco is the king of giving fun nicknames to people so when you call him your baby girl it just brightens up his day.
King Hippo: Is fine with it, he doesn’t completely understand what it means but knows it’s a term of endearment.
Piston Hondo: Much like Von Kaiser he dislikes how much the name makes his face go red especially in public so please only call him such a name in private please.
Bear Hugger: Oh aren’t you such a little jokester, seriously this man is in tears laughing his butt off. Now that you have called him your bby girl he will in actual conversations with the other boxers refer to himself as a baby girl. He has absolutely no shame.
Great Tiger: Is mildly amused by the name and will tease you about it to his home and back, but that doesn’t mean he won’t get slightly flustered about it. Good thing he has his magical clones to distract you for a moment while he composes himself.
Don Flamenco: More or less accepts the pet name but please refrain from using it around the other boxers as there is so many other better pet names you could give him.
Aran Ryan: Oh it’s so on now you have opened the gates of chaos my friend be prepared for the most wild pet names to come out of this guy’s mouth. Yes he is your bby girl but you are his little meow meow honestly it’s gotten past the point of being cute pet names and into the realm of just trying to fluster the other, it’s very fun.
Soda Popinski: Another one that just laughs at the name, are you sure you are not the bby girl here? No it’s still him well ok then if that’s what you want. He honestly isn’t all that bothered by the name.
Bald Bull: You have signed a possible death sentence please tread carefully, honestly it depends on if the paparazzi are around or not. If they are then prepare to see a very angry bull (thankfully his anger is not directed at you, yet) if they aren’t around then he just gets mildly annoyed with it.
Super Macho Man: Another one that just accepts it as is because he has already been called every name in the book by his fans so this is nothing new to him. You might be able to get a light chuckle but that’s it.
Mr Sandman: Finds the pet name quite amusing because have you seen the size of him, it should be you that’s the bby girl but if you insist on it being him then he’ll accept it but not without a bit of light teasing first.
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goferwashere · 19 days
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PO!! Wii Boxers as Odetari Songs :3
Odetari brainrot foreverrrr
based entirely on vibes/sound. Not too many deep lyrics or explanations to be found here sorry y’all I just need to get this out of my system this is 4 fun
If u want deep analysis of lyrics tho go look to @/oohbuggypie bc omllll bro KNOWS how to dissect lyrics
Glass Joe - LOOK DONT TOUCH
- Bit of a more chill vibe, upbeat which I think makes sense for him
- also SCORPIO bc watch his title Defense fight with it playing the background and his idle syncs up up w the song perfectly
Von Kaiser - GET UP OFF ME
- I was fighting his TD when this came on
Disco Kid - THROAT GOAT
- So much of the vocals have such a teasing vibe to them idk… feels like disco
- Also less of a ‘dark’ sound to it?? Idk if that’s the right word but it’s less intense than some of his other stuff
King Hippo - I PEEP
- Relatively chill, idk how to explain it
Piston Hondo - I <3 LATINAS
- hunch
Bear Hugger - BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER
- GET THIS SHIT JUMPIN 🗣️💥
Great Tiger - DOUBLE TROUBLE
- come on now… the clones??? Double trouble??
- Also this instrumental is the best one you can’t argue with me bc I’m right.
- Very upbeat and fast yess..
Don Flamenco - LOVE POTION
- He’s a charmer fr
Aran Ryan - RED EYES BLACK DRAGON CHAIN
- idk
Soda Popinski - MUDDY CUP
- yeah
- Bro listening to this while watching him swing during his fight like u know he’d get down to this in the club
Bald Bull - DXE DXE DXE
- I do think he’s chill outside the ring, but that man has a crazy ass persona
Super Macho Man - 2 EASY
- 🤑
Mr. Sandman - GMFU
- boss ass song for a boss ass bitch
- He will get u FUCKED UP. (In the ring)
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trulybetty · 7 months
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oct' 17 x whispers
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Prompt: apple scent Pairing: Dieter Bravo x Bryony Morgan (OFC) Word Count: 609 Warnings: un-beta'd is the name of the game, playing fast and loose with prompts, dieter being dieter, mostly fluff and maybe one fiona the hippo reference. Summary: what happens in vegas...
x. masterlist
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Amidst the clamor of neon lights and the faint hum of the city's nightlife, whispers passed between Bryony and Dieter as they stood outside the Las Vegas Little White Chapel. Bryony's heart raced, the weight of their spontaneous decision settling in.
“Are we really doing this?” she asked, her voice tinged with a mixture of excitement and disbelief as they stood beneath the fluorescent glow of the building's neon sign.
Dieter grinned, his eyes twinkling mischievously in the dim light. “Well, we're here, aren't we?” He paused for a moment, looking almost contemplative. “Although, I’m still disappointed that Fiona isn’t ordained,” he added with a playful sigh.
Bryony laughed softly, her nerves eased by Dieter's familiar humor. She looked glowing in her dress, each shimmering bead and sequin reflecting the city lights. The sheer white fabric glowed, with feathered fringes at the sleeves and hem swaying with every subtle movement. Her bouquet of fresh daffodils Dieter had managed to procure, putting confirmation on Vegas being the city where anything was possible, seemed to mirror her radiance.
Dieter, looking equally casually dashing and debonair in his navy velvet suit, wrapped an arm around her. The rich blue of his attire made a striking contrast against her luminous white dress.
“Thought only virgins wore white,” he whispered into her ear, his hand finding hers as he played with the engagement ring that had only graced her finger for all of two months. 
Bryony looked up at Dieter, a wicked smile on her ruby red lips, “What the King doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” 
Dieter squeezed her hand as he laughed, it had been his idea to elope to Vegas. Neither one of them were interested in the formalities of a wedding. But it had been Bryony’s insistence that if they were going to do it, they were going to do it properly and it was going to be Elvis or nothing at all. 
“On a scale of one to ten,” Dieter asked as he pushed open the door of the Chapel, “is your mom going to be mad we eloped?”
Bryony snorted, “She’ll be pissed at me, but shoving KitKats and cups of tea at you while she tells you she loves you.”
It was a slight exaggeration, but Bronwyn’s love for Dieter was well known.
Dieter glanced down at Bryony with a smirk, “I can’t help it if I’m the favourite.”
She nudged him playfully, “Sure, like you don’t love to encourage it.”
The two of them stood in the entrance for a brief moment, the air filled with the scent of fresh flowers and the soft hum of the chapel's air conditioning. They could hear the faint strains of an Elvis song playing from speakers from somewhere further inside.
Bryony sighed contentedly, wrapping her arm through Dieter's. “You know, as impromptu as this all is, it feels... right.”
Dieter pulled her close, his fingers brushing a stray hair from her face. “It's us. A little unpredictable, and maybe a bit mad?”
Bryony laughed, “You sure you’re not talking about you?” she said as she rested her head on his shoulder, taking in the gravity of what they were about to do.
Gathering up some courage, Dieter looked down at her, his voice soft yet earnest. “Are you ready to become Mrs. Bravo, Ms Morgan?”
Bryony nodded as the double doors to the left of them swung open, the doorway framing a tall man in a black rhinestone jumpsuit, guitar swung on his back and what looked like to Bryony his own hair styled in a tremendous quiff. 
“Well, howdy there, lovebirds! Are y'all ready to get all shook up?”
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punch-out-filth · 4 months
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Do you think you can do the boxer's dick sizes from largest to smallest (Including the snes boxers and pizza)?
Here's a complete list of all the boxers' dick sizes! This took me forever, but I hope you all enjoy it! I think dicks of all types are wonderful, so I tried to list as many different sizes as I can. :)
Gabby Jay - 0.5 inch t-dick
Aran Ryan - 1.5 inch t-dick
Heike Kagero - 3.6
Glass Joe - 4 inch t-dick
Pizza Pasta - 4.8
Soda Popinski - 5.2
Narcis Prince - 5.5
Dragon Chan - 5.6
Kid Quick - 5.7
Hoy Quarlow - 5.9
Don Flamenco - 6.0
Piston Hondo - 6.3
Bob Charlie - 6.4
Von Kaiser - 6.4
Bear Hugger - 6.5
Mad Clown - 6.8
Super Macho Man - 6.9 inch phalloplasty dick
Disco Kid - 6.10
Great Tiger - 7.1
Piston Hurricane - 7.2
King Hippo - 7.5
Bald Bull - 7.6
Masked Muscle - 8.9
Rick Bruiser - 9.4
Nick Bruiser - 9.4
Mr. Sandman - 11… 0_0
I never thought I would reach the tag limit on a post for this blog, but it happened with this one! It's quite the accomplishment. XD
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matchamabs · 7 months
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yo we're doin' this like. short comic project for Punch Out based on the original string of canon comics released with the wii games and we need 4 more artists to fill out the group so we can do one comic each. randomly assigned boxers too ✌ gonna put em all together at the end cmon help us outttt <3
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tempi-moderni · 2 months
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🎵Watch out Mr. Lion don't bite me.
Shout down, if you wanna go free.
I'll hear when you call and I answer you all:
Grau Grau Grau.
Some people are'nt nice to lions.
Some people are'nt nice to hippos.
We better think twice let's try it be nice.
Grau Grau Grau
Man is wild and lions are wild,
That's what most people say.
But I have seen that malice king
And lions just like to play.
And I'm not drunk, it's not the sun,
That makes me feel this way.
But lions are mart and minor wild
And children just like to play.
So please Mr. Man don't shoot me.
Don't catch me, don't take me away.
It's here where I live, let's forget and forgive.
Grau Grau Grau🎵
Io sto con gli Ippopotami (1979)
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fan-mans · 1 year
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any hcs for super macho man ? 🙏
BOGUS
Here's my first one in case you missed it btw~
Macho got his name from his dad's former wrestling career as Mr. Macho. His dad was absolutely honored to have the name picked up by his son.
Macho loves all his dad's movies- a few he even mimics while he re-watches them for the 100th time.
He has a shit ton of cousins.
He's never wanted to get married. The only way he could possibly be convinced for marriage is if it would make his taxes easier.
He sucks at math and actively hates science.
In high school, during a chemistry lesson, one of his gloves caught on fire and he ended up with a horrible scar on his right hand.
Even though he was pretty popular in school, he's never had many friends (Mostly because he's got a pretty rough personality). The only time he's had more than 3 real friends at a time has been as an adult after him and the world circuit started being buddies.
He loves cooking and is particular to matzo ball soup and challa! He learned almost everything he knows from his bubbie
Despite being jewish, he does have 3 tattoos. One over his heart with an excerpt from the torah and a magen david, one on his calf of a surfboard and some flowers, and one on his arm of a great white caught in a wave. He covers them up with his tan or clothes, but has shown them off a few times.
He got his ears pierced at 12 at a claires. The piercings got infected and he had to go to the hospital but macho still thinks the pain was worth it.
His favorite animals are the great white sharks, his second favorite are whales, and his third are sting rays. He thinks they get too much of a bad rap from the public.
Once a great white came right up to him while he was surfing! He was a kid then and stayed firmly on his board but from that day forward he was fascinated with sharks.
A good portion of his money goes to charities and organizations dedicated to protecting the ocean. Especially charities that help sharks and other 'scary' fish.
Though he grew up with a dog, he much prefers small reptiles, amphibians, and fish. He has a small pond near his house and he frequently feeds and plays with the fish and frogs living there.
Like his hair, macho takes good care of his skin. His hands are soft like a newborn baby's ass and it's very well moisturized.
His nails are always a mess. He bites them frequently so they're scraggly nubs.
All the girls in his contender intro are current girlfriends. Macho is also with a good number of men at the moment. He is the epicenter of the Greater California Polycule.
He's not a big fan of clothes so he tends to parade his house with little to nothing on. This has led to just about all his friends catching him naked at least once. Bull is the only exception because he doesn't do surprise drop-ins on anyone's house.
Macho sleeps in nothing but a pair of socks.
Officially has the 3rd juciest ass out of the entire wvba, behind Soda and King Hippo. He doesn't take it that personally, all things considered.
He can speak the language of Hippo Island alongside sandman. Their deep voices lend well to the growling required for the language.
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WHO'S READY
Get ready for the TRUE ULTIMATE FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S TOURNAMENT
We have all sorts of animatronics here. And by that, I mean...well, I'll put the list at the end. I'm not sure when the tournament will begin, but it will happen at some point, and I will give an announcement the day before. It won't be done the normal way, but instead in a different way. Hope all you FNAF fans are ready to learn the true best FNAF animatronic
THE CHARACTERS
FNAF 1: FREDDY, BONNIE, CHICA, FOXY, GOLDEN FREDDY
FNAF 2: WITHERED FREDDY, WITHERED BONNIE, WITHERED CHICA, WITHERED FOXY, WITHERED GOLDEN FREDDY TOY FREDDY, TOY BONNIE, TOY CHICA, MANGLE, BALLOON BOY, JJ, THE PUPPET SHADOW FREDDY, RWQFSFASXC
FNAF 3: SPRINGTRAP, PHANTOM FREDDY, PHANTOM CHICA, PHANTOM FOXY, PHANTOM MANGLE, PHANTOM BALLOON BOY, PHANTOM PUPPET
FNAF 4: NIGHTMARE FREDDY, NIGHTMARE BONNIE, NIGHTMARE CHICA, NIGHTMARE FOXY, NIGHTMARE FREDBEAR, NIGHTMARE, PLUSHTRAP JACK-O-BONNIE, JACK-O-CHICA, NIGHTMARE MANGLE, NIGHTMARE BALLOON BOY, NIGHTMARIONNE
FNAF SISTER LOCATION: CIRCUS BABY, BALLORA, FUNTIME FREDDY, FUNTIME FOXY, BONBON, BONNET, BIDYBAB, ELECTROBAB, MINIREENA, ENNARD
FNAF WORLD: LOLBIT, DEEDEE, XOR, MENDO ENDO, OLD MAN CONSEQUENCES
FREDDY FAZBEAR PIZZERIA SIMULATOR: BUCKET BOB, MR. CAN DO, MR. HUGS, #1 CRATE, PAN STAN HAPPY FROG, MR. HIPPO, PIGPATCH, NEDD BEAR, ORVILLE ELEPHANT ROCKSTAR FREDDY, ROCKSTAR BONNIE, ROCKSTAR CHICA, ROCKSTAR FOXY, LEFTY HELPY, EL CHIP, FUNTIME CHICA, MUSIC MAN CANDY CADET, SECURITY PUPPET, LEMONADE CLOWN, FRUIT PUNCH CLOWN, PRIZE KING MOLTEN FREDDY, SCRAP BABY, AFTON
FNAF VR HELP WANTED: DARK FREDDY, NEON BONNIE, NEON CHICA, BURNT FOXY, SHADOW MANGLE, DARK FOXY DREADBEAR, GRIM FOXY GLITCHTRAP, VANNY
FNAF SECURITY BREACH: GLAMROCK FREDDY, GLAMROCK CHICA, ROXANNE WOLF, MONTGOMERY GATOR DAYCARE ATTENDANT (sun), DAYCARE ATTENDANT (moon), WIND-UP MUSIC MAN, DJ MUSIC MAN, STAFF-BOT, NIGHTMARIONNE STAFF-BOT THE BLOB, BURNTRAP
FNAF AR SPECIAL DELIVERY: SHAMROCK FREDDY, EASTER BONNIE, CATRINA TOY CHICA CHOCOLATE BONNIE, MELTED CHOCOLATE BONNIE 8-BIT BABY, VR TOY FREDDY, HIGHSCORE TOY CHICA, SYSTEM ERROR TOY BONNIE RADIOACTIVE FOXY, TOXIC SPRINGTRAP FIREWORK FREDDY, LIBERTY CHICA FLAMETHROWER ENDO, BROILER BABY, SCORCHING CHICA, FLAMING SPRINGTRAP RINGMASTER FOXY, MAGICIAN MANGLE, CLOWN SPRINGTRAP, GREAT ESCAPE GOLDEN FREDDY WOODLAND TOY FREDDY, BOULDER TOY BONNIE, SWAMP BALLOON BOY FREDDY FROSTBEAR, BLACK ICE FROSTBEAR, ARCTIC BALLORA, FROSTBITE BALLOON BOY, FROST PLUSHTRAP HEARTSICK BABY, BLACK HEART BONNIE SERPENT MANGLE, THE CURSE LITTLE RED CHICA, BIG BAD FOXY DARK WATER ENDO, SUNKEN TOY BONNIE, PIRANHA PLUSHTRAP CLOCKWORK BALLORA, CLOCKWORK MINIREENA, AERONAUT TOY FREDDY, JETPACK BALLOON BOY
SPRINGLOCKS: FREDBEAR, SPRING BONNIE
PHONE GUYS: PHONE GUY, PHONE DUDE (FNAF 3)
ENDOS: ENDO-01, ENDO-02, ENDOPLUSH, NIGHTMARE ENDO, GLAMROCK ENDO, YENNDO
BOOKS: TWISTED FREDDY, TWISTED BONNIE, TWISTED CHICA, TWISTED FOXY, TWISTED WOLF THEODORE, STANLEY, ELLA ENTER THE PIT SPRING BONNIE, FETCH, LONELY FREDDY, PLUSHTRAP CHASER, ELEANOR, BLACKBIRD, RALPHO, LUCKY BOY, TAG-ALONG FREDDY, COILS, FELIX THE SHARK, THE STITCHWRAITH
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strawbs-screaming · 6 months
Text
the boxers at a fancy restaurant
help my posts arent getting as much likes as before has tumblr decided to kill my blog, also pretend they actually started hanging out very recently and no one really tolerates aran yet
Glass Joe
- casually trying to have his escargot, pretending aran didnt just order chicken tenders at a 5 star restaurant
- chugging down on red wine like your aunt at the family reunion after the divorce
- you know how your mom gives you THAT stare when you sit in a "not very proper" way at a guest's house? Hes just giving that one look at anyone misbehaving
- doing his best to not break a bottle on someones head, broke a wine glass in his hand from anger
Von Kaiser
- Just staring at Joe, eye to eye, trying to talk in stares, cant tell if Joe is judging him or trying to beg for help
- side eyeing anyone in his vicinity who dares to actually call out the awkward tension thats in the air
- choked on his spaghetti halfway through the dinner
- trying to signal to Joe to put down the wine glass
- planning to just get up and leave
Disco Kid
- not feeling the tension in the air, treating it as everyone being shy, got hit in the face with the realization halfway through his steak, his smile faded quicker than he blinked
- concerned for Joe, kind of afraid to ask if hes okay
- avoiding eye contact as much as possible, only to end up staring into the soul of a underpaid waiter
- wanted to order off the kids menu but too embarrased
King Hippo
- Casually eating, hes the only one not understanding the tension
- accidentally ate a fork
- Just eating his lobster bisque not understanding why Joe is staring at aran with murderous intent
- staring off into the void
Piston Hondo
- my god this mans TENSE. Sweating his soul out both from the stress in the air & bright lights. is concerned if hes using the correct fork while king hippo just eats the plate
- visibly sweating, cant tell if hes being held at gunpoint or having dinner
- staring at his plate in fear
Bear Hugger
- trying to do icebreakers but falling, getting dirty looks from Joe
- stuffing grilled salmon in his pockets for mrs bear
- planning to escape from the bathroom window
- also visibly tense, staring at hondo with a look of concern only to get another look of concern back
Great Tiger
- sipping his drink while pretending to be calm, internal screaming
- looks really calm, is actually considering teleporting away
- blinking to avoid eye contact
Don Flamenco
- casually chatting away with Hippo, trying to live laugh love out of the stress
- only person who had the gut to tell Joe to stop drinking wine
- "joe, arent you having too much wine?"
- "no."
- feels like hes on death row
Aran Ryan
- ordered chicken tenders from the kids menu, got up to annoy the lobsters in the lobster tank at some point
- talking about childhood memories, thinking hes clearing the air when everyones just concerned and wants to leave
- hit on a waitress while ordering orange juice, how romantic
Soda Popinski
- chatting with king hippo & don flamenco, hes not aware of the tension and thinks everyones just awkward
- only person Joe isnt side-eyeing
- actually listening to aran talk
Bald Bull
- got up halfway through and escaped from the window in the bathroom, ran to his limo & went away, hes not having this today no thank you, also got piston hondo along with him since he was concerned he'd have a heat stroke
- was eating mussels, actually enjoyed it until the tension got too much for him
- not going to acknowledge the fact he climbed through a bathroom window just to escape until hes on his death bed
Super Macho Man
- came 20 minutes late, no shame, no guilt, reeking of axe body spray
- casually eating his food while flexing his watch, no ones listening please just eat your food
- not a hint of stress from him, Just live laugh love'ing out here
Mr Sandman
- also side eyeing everyone, not that tense but more judgy, def thinking "im the only normal one here"
- got a headache
- regrets planning this out
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Note
Do how old is everyone here?
We can answer that pretty easy! The setting of this point in the AU is early September, 2020 (with no... unfortunate happenstances happening; the world hasn't gone to shit yet, and it won't in the ways that happened in the real world). With that being said, the AU technically starts in late 2017, and we'll get to some of the plot in flashbacks, so just take everyone's canon ages and add three! For instance, Mac at the time of this blog is 20, Disco Kid is 23, Von Kaiser is 45, etc.
But if you really wanna be 100% accurate, you better keep this hush-hush. You didn't hear this from me.
Little Mac (Mackenzie Mancuso): 20 (December 15th, 1999) Doc Louis (Jerome Louis): 46 (July 9th, 1974) Carmen Isabela Merlo Campana: 221 (March 8th, 1799) Glass Joe (Julien Mercier): 418 (October 30th, 1599) Von Kaiser (Stefan von Fischer): 107 (January 19th, 1913) Disco Kid (Marcus Corey): 23 (born April 10th, 1997) King Hippo (Arumogo Aroi): ??? (centuries old, maybe June [18th]) Piston Hondo (Nakamura Tadashi): 31 (November 1st, 1264) Bear Hugger (Shawn Patrick Ruddock): 35 (February 3rd, 1985) Great Tiger (Sandhi Mandal): 32 (September 29th, 1988) Don Flamenco (Rafael Emilio Ordóñez): 228 (April 16th, 1792) Declan Clover (Aran Ryan): ??? (centuries old in human years, 26 in feywild years, definitely April 7th) Soda Popinski (Mikhail Ivanovich Korobov): 139 (May 19th, 1881) Bald Bull (Erhan Tiryaki): 39 (September 13th, 1984) Super Macho Man (Randy Laurent): "30" (35 - May 21st, 1985) Mr. Sandman (Clay Gabriel Esther): 34 (August 8th, 1986)
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