#hey u know what is an interesting thing?

[sluckythewizard]

BUT IM NOT A WRITER. something strange possessed me to write my first proper fanfic in maybe a decade. be niceys to me but also grill me so i can get stronger. this one is a stupidly self indulgent bit between Soda and Emizel, a day or so after emizel was sired. CW for gore descriptions, but thats about it i think. image below is a snippet of the start. the rest of the whole dang thing will be under the cut. ive never posted fanfic ever in my life. read my tags for secret behind da scenes commentary

"Oh shit… I think hes dead…" It was another night, another patrol, another fight, and another win, for Emizel and Soda.

Under moonlight, under street light, under interwoven wires above, the two stood here in a quiet and damp alleyway. The air was drenched with the smell of a previous rain, and the puddles of said storm remain huddled in corners and pot holes.

One splashed as soda found himself stepping forwards into one. The residual adrenaline of the fight had left his body shaking, his heart still pounding, his wounds still throbbing. They had still won; or more-so, Emizel had won. A particularly nasty blow to the side had Soda reduced to the side lines for most of the fight, left to watch as his newly vampiric comrade had absolutely eviscerated the competition.

Emizel had only been turned a day ago, but it was impossible not to notice how it had changed him. He already acted so goddamn confident, so on top of the world, and this newfound power, newfound speed and strength, only built upon his insane ego.

The Fangs that they encountered here on this night stood no fucking chance. Emizel was too quick, too strong, and he easily chased off the rivals. It was only now, as the final unfortunate opponent had turned to flee, a clean clock in the jaw sent the human tumbling to the ground with a dull thump, and it did not move afterward.

Soda shifts his shoe out of the puddle, the cold seeping into his sock being one of the few things keeping his mind in his body in the moment. Is the guy breathing?

A low laugh bleeds from Emizel as he stretches his arms, licking his sharpened teeth as he stares off in the direction the remaining Fangs went. Soda knew that look on his face, the look of a tiger pondering on its next kill, he knew well that Emizel wanted to chase them.

But the guy on the ground.. It was one punch to the face, and the wicked crack sound that came from it had planted a seeding dread within Sodas chest.

As he steps forward, around the puddle, the resulting sound made Emizels attention click back over to Soda, the snap of his gaze making Soda flinch.

The two lock eyes, and Soda weakly gestures to the limp body on the floor. "The uh.. I think.. Is that guy dead?" He finally asks, having a hard time keeping contact with Emizels intensely red eyes.

Emizel turns his attention to said body, tilting his head as he goes to kick at the thing, turning it over. "Man no way hes dead, I punched him once." He mutters.

"Well, yeah, but his head almost twisted all the way around when you did.." Soda steps up to stand beside Emizel, the two boys standing with their hands in their pockets, down at this unfortunate, limp body.

"Should we hide it?" Soda asks, glancing back over at Emizel, who had.. An odd look on his face. He was clearly pondering something, but Soda could only guess whatever was going on in that brilliant head of his. He knew and trusted that Emizel was smart. If anyone could figure out what to do about this, it would be him.

But the lack of an answer had anxiety chewing at the back of Sodas rib cage, and after a second, he speaks up again, compelled to fill what he perceived as a tense silence. "Like.. I dunno, I've never uh... killed a guy..." He shrugs, prompting Emizel to let out a big sigh.

"He's not dead man, just out fuckin cold." Emizel kneels down next to the body, putting an ear up to its chest, and pondering on that for a moment. An uncertainty twists his expression, as he decides to instead place a hand on the victims throat, checking for a pulse. A moment passes, and seemingly finding nothing, he pulls back.

"Uh... Okay, so he might be dead."

Something about the confirmation from Emizel made a shiver run up Sodas spine. That, or maybe it was just the breeze agitating the cold water in his shoe.

"Huh… Damn.." Was all that Soda could really get to leave his mouth. Which was hardly a splash compared to the torrent that was slowly churning in his head. They just killed a guy. Or, Emizel just killed a guy. And it was so easy. They had to hide the body now, right? That was the usual progression here? Getting caught for murder was way more extreme than getting caught for breaking mailboxes with soda cans. It was so, so disturbingly easy. It really was just one punch. It's not like the Fangs are weak by any means, so just one punch? And this guy is dead? Forever?

Or, perhaps by human means, their rivals were fairly tough. But Emizel was on a whole other level. No mortal could stand up to him now...

"Hey, are you okay?"

The question had pulled Soda back from his head, his gaze flicking back over to Emizel, who was looking up at him with those eerie, piercing red eyes. Soda felt another shiver.

"Uh, ieah man, I'm all good." Soda nods, swallowing down whatever anxiety was bubbling up in his throat.

But Emizel didn't seem satisfied by his answer, standing back up and staring down his human comrade. Soda couldn't meet his eyes, his gaze instead traveling downward, and pausing on Emizels red, cut-up shirt. There was something off about the color, the way it seemed darker in some spots, brighter in others.. Wait, wasn't Emizel wearing a white shirt before all this?

The vampire boy seems to pick up on Sodas expression, following his eyes down to his shirt. "Oh, yeah! While you were on the floor, the knife guy got me a little" He says, a stupidly simple smile on his face. Soda was about to let out a laugh at how unbothered his friend seemed by it, but it gets caught in his throat when Emizel goes to pull his shirt up.

The sound of the bloodied fabric peeling away from skin made Sodas own skin crawl, but that wasn't nearly as bad as the sight of the intense gash running from his collar bone, down to his stomach.

"Oh, fuck dude!" Soda gasps, but Emizel laughs it off. Even despite knowing Emizel well, Soda was still surprised by just how much Emizel could shrug off. "Shit, doesn't that hurt, dude?"

"Oh yeah this fucking hurts!" he says with a laugh, his smile big and toothy and proud as he presents this egregious wound. Swollen and angry, pulsing with a slow heartbeat, and still oozing with thick, dark blood.

The sight of the split flesh, and the glints of bone beneath the dark, dark red all tugged at Sodas gag reflex, and yet he couldn't pull his eyes away. So Emizel's just been walking and talking so normally this whole time with his chest just cleaved wide open? Soda felt just as impressed as he felt horrified.

It wasn't until Emizel reaches down to poke at the abhorrent wound that Soda snaps out of it. Watching his friend press his fingers into the bloodied flesh, and slowly pulling it apart, allowing more ichor to seep from the gash, it was too much to watch at this point.

Soda reaches up to put a hand on Emizels wrist, the vampire boy stopping, and looking up at his friend.

Soda found himself freezing again when he locks eyes with Emizel. He was going to say something now, right? "U-uhm.." Is all he really chokes out, giving Emizels wrist a gentle tug. "D-do you. Uh. I suppose a hospital Isn't a place you can go anymore..?"

Emizel just smirks at that, letting Soda pull his hand away from the wound. "Oh, yeah no, but it's fine. I mean, I don't think it's gonna kill me" He shrugs. It was so, so impressive just how unphased Emizel was by all this. Fuck he's actually so cool.

"Well yeah man but it's like, still a bleeding hole. Like you're soaked in blood dude, I'm pretty sure that even a vampire needs that stuff on like, the inside." Soda rubs the back of his head, still unnerved by the sight of it all. "Vampires have like, super healing, don't they?"

"Oh yeah like, regeneration powers. I know I heal faster sometimes but I dunno how to just, activate it on command.." Emizel hums, his eyes narrowing down at his own injury, as if trying to will it into mending. Soda looks away, unable to watch that vile gash ooze any longer.

"I dunno man, how do they do it in like, video games?" Soda tosses the question out, trying to click together some sort of solution in his own head.

"Uhhh.. Huh, video games.." Emizel repeats to himself, chewing on the thought while idly poking at the laceration; until an idea audibly flickers to life in his head. "Oh, I just gotta refill my blood meter. Or whatever."

"Oooh yeah, blood meter!" Soda perks up, "Of course, see this is why you're the brains, man" Soda smiles, glancing back over to his cool friend, but immediately needing to look away again when the sight of that egregious gash tugs bile back into his throat.

While Soda averts his eyes, Emizels eyes wander back over to the body, and that classic 'Emizel has a bad idea' smile creeps across his face.

"Well, if this guys dead, I'm sure he's not gonna need all that blood.." He grins, kneeling down next to the body again.

The word 'wait' had hardly gotten the chance to crawl from Sodas mouth, before Emizel lifts up the arm of the unfortunate body, pulling the sleeve back, and immediately sinking his teeth into the exposed wrist.

The sound and the sight of blood gushing around Emizels teeth made Soda cringe, his hand impulsively coming up to aide his own wrist. An empathetic phantom pain made his wrist ache, his imagination simulating the feeling of shark teeth cutting into skin, sinking deep into the flesh, and clacking against bone. That was a lot of blood, that was streaming down the arm of this fodder.

A low growl bleeds from Emizel as he adjusts his teeth, cutting into more flesh, opening the wound further, and allowing a pulsing torrent of red to stream down his chin, onto his coat. It was an annoying thing, to clean blood out of clothing. Most of the Demons deemed it easier to just let the stains remain. But the night that Emizels throat was torn open, and liters upon liters were granted freedom from his human form, the unbelievable mess had practically changed half the color of Emizels iconic coat.

That was the first time Soda had ever seen that much blood from one person. And well. This would probably be the second.

The sight was unnerving, but it was impossible to look away. The alley was quiet, save for the distant bustle of a distant city, which made the noisy squish and squelch of teeth gnawing on flesh all the more apparent and nauseating.

Emizel had become a monster for sure, and watching it feed on something was… thrilling, in a way. It reminded Soda of feeding a pet spider, or lizard. A mouse for a snake.

It's a heavy thing to witness, the end of a human life. The fear of death is a primal thing, and Soda was no different from any other living thing. He figured everyone else feared death just as much as he does. Well, maybe except for Emizel, of course.

It made sense. Emizel was such a cocky and noisy kind of guy, but hes always had the power to back it up. Even when he lost, or seemed at his lowest, Soda still saw this sort of fire in him, one that Soda admired.

Of course Emizel would be the one to become something like a vampire. Something that Soda had always figured was just a fantasy creature thing. He wondered; if vampires were real, what else was real? Werewolves? Zombies? Unicorns? Are there real demons? Like from hell? Is hell real? Is he going to hell?

The sudden ttteeeeaaaaarrrr of flesh rips soda from his wandering thoughts. Emizel was tugging his head away from the arm of his kill, his teeth clamped down into the chewed meat, and pulling it apart. Soda had seldom seen so much of the inside of a human arm, and the sight of spilling threads and squirming veins was hardly something he ever wanted to stomach again.

"Oh fuck, dude, hey-" Soda steps forward, raising a hand, but the way Emizel snaps his head back over to him, twisting to an unnatural degree, Soda cant help jolting back.

Reddened teeth glint menacingly in the low light, a threatening growl thundering from its clenched, dripping jaws. Emizels eyes were focused, yet wild, glowing with whatever light they could reflect.

Sodas eyes were wide, and his body was frozen in the thick, electric tension within the air. It was like staring down an angry dog.. Suddenly a light bulb in his head flickers to life. It was kind of like an angry dog, right? One hunched over a meal it didn't want to give up. Memories of old encounters and unfortunate dog bites resurface in Sodas head, and with that experience, and with those lessons learned, he gathers the courage to react.

He shuts his eyes, keeping them closed for a few seconds, as he slowly pulls back his arm, and slowly steps back. It was an eye contact thing, wasn't it? Eye contact makes dogs angry, right? That was how you dealt with an angry dog? As he pulls back, and takes in a breath for composure, he finally dares to peek at the angry vampire before him again.

Its snarling had died down, but its eyes were still trained intently on Soda. After a tense, and agonizingly, slow pause... It blinks back, lowering its head back down to its meal, but keeping its anxious stare on this potential threat.

A relieved sigh falls from soda as the tension finally melts. He didnt realize he was holding in so much of his breath. "O-okay, man.. It's yours, you uh.. Earned it.." Soda mutters, stepping back further, until he was standing in a sufficiently dry enough space to sit down in. Now that he wasn't standing, he was finally taking into mind just how much his hands were shaking.

It's odd. Soda couldn't really describe this feeling thrumming in his chest as something like fear.. Nausea? For sure. Disturbed and rattled? Oh absolutely. This was certainly a sight he would have a hard time scrubbing from his eyelids when he sleeps tonight. But he wasn't scared. The memory of the night that Emizel was sired still coated the inside of his mind like an unwashable film. Even in that moment, when the unnatural teeth from the unnatural maw of an unnatural thing hovered over his throat, he couldn't say with confidence that he was scared.

Emizel really is his best friend in the world. And he knows with his whole heart that Emizel feels the same. He knew and trusted that his best friend would never hurt him. Not too badly at least. He loves Emizel, and would give anything to support him.

Like a mouse to a snake.

This really is an incredible power that his comrade had come across, and Soda especially felt a sort of pride in his friend. He felt it was worth it to help him feed it.

The bile in his throat had made its point, and Soda agreed, that watching someone die, and get torn apart and drained might be too much for him. Despite how much he hated the Fangs, the end of any human life seemed like such a jarring thing. To have such an intense fear finally get confronted. Would he go to hell?

Maybe he couldn't just feed people to his friend. So an alternative could be donated blood, right? Soda wouldn't mind giving up something like blood. His body makes it for free, after all. Maybe some other Demons would agree to give up some blood too. But they shouldn't have to take on such a burden. Soda wouldn't mind being the only one. The only one. The only one.

His hand comes up to rub at his neck, as his imagination conjures up what it might feel like to have teeth sink into his flesh. He's been stabbed before, is that sort of what it would feel like? Would he have to get stitches? He didn't really want to get stitches, so maybe there could be a more effective way to get the blood out of him. And there was so much vital stuff in his neck too. There's' a vein that's safe to cut into somewhere, right? He would have to look that up later.

A STARTLING RINGING;

Splits the moment,

Prompting both Soda and Emizel to jolt in shock,

As the phone in Emizels pocket rings away.

Acting as if nothing abnormal had taken place, Emizel pulls out his phone, and answers it.

"Heyy, Johnny! Yeah we chased em off, I don't think those bastards will be infesting this street again anytime soon. Yeah, ieah we'll be heading back soon. Oh fuck yeah dude, save us some!"

Emizel covers the speaker of his Nokia, turning back to Soda with a big smile on his violently bloodied face. "They got some pizza waiting for us back home, dude!" he whispers out to him.

Soda does his best to crack a smile, and to suppress the look of unease that probably stained his face, as he stares at the literal murder scene that's been splattered about in front of him.

"Oh, yeah, hell yeah man.." He swallows down the bile again. "What kind of uh.. Soda did they get?"

Emizel ponders that, before turning back to the phone to ask Sodas question.

"Sprite and a big pack of that one strawberry mountain dew" Emizel tosses the answer back over to Soda, who gives a nod, and thumbs up.

Mountain dew is so neat, Soda really liked all the wacky flavors those guys come up with. The thought of going home and opening a can of soda was certainly a comfort. After witnessing all this blood and gore and viscera, Soda absolutely needed to get back home and get a nice cold glass of something bright red .

As Sodas mind wanders off to soda, Emizel wraps up the conversation on the phone, before hanging up, and standing up.

The movement had pulled Sodas mind back into the moment, enough for him to timidly voice a concern he's had since the start of this debacle.

"Uh, hey, so.. The body, should we… Uh.." He gestures vaguely to it, and Emizel grants it a nonchalant glance.

"Eh, I can toss it into a dumpster or something, I dunno. I'm sure its fine. I'll handle it."

The vampire boy goes to pick up the corpse, the wound in its mangled arm no longer even dripping with blood, the flesh pale from the absolute absence of red in its veins.

"Go ahead and meet me by that one mailbox, the one with the bullet hole in it." Emizel casually instructs, tossing the drained body over his shoulder. "I'll catch up."

"Uh, yeah, okay.." Soda musters up a nod, and the strength to rise back up to his feet, wincing as that bruise on his side makes itself loudly known again. He still felt anxious, but even despite it all, he knew he could trust Emizel to take care of things. He always does. "Just stay safe man, I'll see you there." Soda assures with a smile, and Emizel matches it, tossing him a wink. And then suddenly- -He's gone! If Soda had blinked he would've missed it, but he was fortunate enough to just barely catch the glimpse of Emizel darting off at an inhuman speed, probably looking for a place to dump the body. Right, he would take care of it. Emizel always makes sure his crew is taken care of. Well... Guess all that's left for Soda is for him to walk back to that meeting spot. He looks around the alley for a moment, taking in the sight of that enormous pool of blood in the middle of the concrete. Or whatever the floor of this alley is made from. He ponders on the present moment a little longer than he meant to, the shock of it all leaving him aimless for just a few, soothing moments of just, decompression. The night is quiet, vast, and cold, but the stresses of just the past 5 hours had left his body radiating with fiery aches and pains, so the chill of the occasional clawing breeze was welcomed. Except for when said breeze agitated the cold water still soaked into his sock. He should step in another puddle on his way back to even it out. The smell of rain still rested heavy in the air, heralding another storm on the horizon. There was that, and then, well, there was also the blood. The stench of it felt far too intense to just ignore it, the metallic miasma making itself maliciously unmistakable. Maybe the impending storm will wash this mess away... He looked forward to putting this unfortunate night behind him. With one last rattled, but deep breath, he stuffs his hands in his pockets, and turns away, strolling back over to the mailbox that Emizel had described.

He couldn't wait to get home and drink some soda with his friends.

#NO TAGS ON THIS ONE BC WELL. IM SHY. IM TAKING A BIG LEAP JUST BY ALLOWING U TO REBLOG THIS. IF IT BREAKS CONTAINMENT THATS UR FAULT. #i unfortunately suffer from the disease of 'i hate everything i write the day after i write it' BUT IM GETTING TREATED #I WILL NOT BE HAUNTED BY THIS WEAKNESS FOREVER. AND HEY LOOK THIS IS THE FIRST ACTUAL FIC BIT IVE EVER FINISHED.. #ITS SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF!! AND BY JOBE I WILL BE PROUD EVEN IF I HATE IT. #i dont always need to be the one who likes my art bc i know Someone out there will always enjoy it. #and to that someone i say: omg thankyou i LOOOOVEE YOUUUUUU!!!!! #JUST DELETED A WHOLE RAMBLE I JUST HAD ABT NERVOUS DISCLAIMERS FOR MY ART BUT I DONT NEED EM!! #GET CONFIDENT GET CONFIDENT GET CONFIDENT. ANYWAY. so emizel and soda huh #THEYRE SO CUTE TOGEEHTERRRR TEEHEHEHEHEEEE they are the homies that kiss eachother goodnight like CMON #but uhh so hey your bestest friend in da world just got turned into a freaky creature thing that eats ppl #ieah yknowthe guy that u care about alot that u had to watch get bled out by another freaky creature thing in an alleyway #yeaaah and you were super hurt and weak and stupid and u couldnt do jack nor shit to help him #what was i talking about again. RIGHT so hes even cooler now bc he cant die n hes super strong n his arms can be knives. sometimes. #but also he can eat people now. and sometimes he cant stop himself from eating people. and thats kinda scary. but in a cool way. #but also in a disturbing way. but also in an interesting way?but also in a freaky way.the feelings ARE MIXED!!!ATLEAST I THINK THEY WOULD B #okay again i havnt listened to the suckening ina bit. so its been a minute since i absorbed their personalities. i could be misreading or #misremembering or misconstruing or mischaracterizing or WHATEVER. i think the confusion carries its intended effect #LOSING MY TRAIN O THOUGHT. anyway i love soda n emizel i hope they get locked in a saw trap together or somethign. for enrichment. #TALOS GRANT ME THE STRENGHT TO POST MY CREATIONS ON LINE!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUGHHH!!!!!!!

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

I love learning ASL it’s so good. Makes me happy to learn it. I’m so glad my university has classes for it with professors actually steeped in Deaf culture.

#blue chatter #am I good at ASL? hahahahahahaha. no. #ASL and English grammar are incredibly different and even when I remember my vocab I am easily clockable as hearing #but I do have some language capacity now. enough to communicate the basics. #and I just. genuinely really enjoy it. it’s fun to learn and engaging in a way most of my classes just aren’t. #and I can. yanno. communicate respectfully w Deaf ppl. and learn about their culture #which is incredibly important given that I want to go into a field where there is a higher incidence than typical of Deaf people #autistic? you’re more likely to be Deaf! #not to mention the fact that sign language can sometimes be a useful alternative to speech for nonspeaking/nonverbal people #depending on the person obvi; some nonspeaking/nonverbal autistics cannot use sign language and that’s okay #but surely at some point I will encounter either a Deaf client or a nonspeaking/nonverbal client who uses ASL #and when that time comes I should have some idea of how to communicate with them #I also rly like the Deaf church by my parents’ house #their community is really welcoming and their services are really interesting #I think it’s rly cool how they take intentions directly from the congregation #they’ll raise their hands and then sign what their intention is from their pew to the ambo #which is rly neat #it is funny bc every time I go the Deaf ppl I talk to will tell each other ‘go slow she’s hearing’ #which is ENTIRELY fair bc. I am hearing. and I do need them to go slower. #but it also makes me laugh bc truly everyone knows within a few minutes. #oh hey the new person? they’re hearing. yeah they’re learning ASL at college. sign slowly for her. #which again makes sense bc a big Deaf culture thing is keeping ppl informed. it’s not gossip it’s getting everyone on the same page. #Deaf ppl do NOT beat around the bush that is like the height of rudeness to them. u say what u mean goshdangit. do not waste their time. #which I appreciate the heck out of bc i don’t have to try and phrase things delicately or w/e #it was also funny bc my mom came w me while I was home for Christmas and they asked her if I was her kid #and she said yes. and the lady running the kid’s craft corner thing was like ‘great you’re doing a craft now’ #and I’m sitting there. visibly over 18 years old. amongst several seven year olds. trying desperately to figure out how to say hot glue gun #I made a v pretty pinecone tree it was a lot of fun ^-^

[astermath]

wait before I go to bed I have a question…

if you had a signature weapon, ANY weapon, what would it be?

mine would either be an axe or a morningstar for SURE (and i’m not just saying that bc I have both of those tattooed smh)

#aster speaks #idk why but this is like #smth i have to know #it’s interesting to me #like hey #what flavour violence do u like? #if u can’t tell i like swinging the heavy things #big impact boom #also axes are fucking sick #i dream of being final girl in a thriller movie and chasing down the killer w an axe #turning that game around mama!

[rox-of-iu]

this is just me going "fine I'll just do it myself" after not being able to find a single fanart for Yi Xian (the cultivation card game). (I bet there's some but I'm just not able to find it)

so here we are, catering to myself and myself only with very low-effort doodles to destress feat. mostly Mu Yifeng, Yan Chen and Jiang Ximing

#Yi xian: the cultivation card game #Mu Yifeng #Yan Chen #Jiang Ximing #i know these arent solid at all but times rough and scribbling go brr #anyway hey if anyones intrigued and wants to know more about the game #its an autobattler deckbuilder in xianxia setting #so if pvp deckbuilding/strategy is your style you absolute should go check it out #i myself hate using my brain and pvp so this is absolutely not what i usually play or would pick up but it charmed me and i love it so much #even tho i SUCK at it so bad #its in early access on steam for 7 euro #for anyone interested #and it makes me so sad that theres so many negative reviews saying its p2w cuz its NOT!!!! the only thing available with money is reskins #and u can get the jades to buy them by playing anyway #but ive heard there were p2w elements back when it got released but they got hotfixed quickly but i guess the rumours stuck around?? sad #also if u like the concept and wanna see more without actually playing i recommend gameplays by retromation they're super entertaining #anyway #yeah i absolutely shouldnt be playing nno games whatsoeveer rn bc i cant afford any of the precious time I've got left #i dont even know exactly how much ive got left until the school leaving exams and shit for Uni like two months ig #im useless absolutely i cant i cant but brain no work and pretty card game makes stress go away uh oh spaghettios #oh well enough of that #cheers #btw ive been doodling in the meantime but ppl actually follow this blog now so I'm overthinking it again and not posting anything goddammit

[brechtian]

so so funny I went to read the handbook on narcissism and npd in an effort to learn more about the disorder & it’s complexities from specialists and what I learned instead is that NOBODY CAN AGREE on what it means AT ALL or anything else about it!!!!!

#rant in tags but an interesting one if u like psychology #don’t get me wrong the handbook IS from 2011 so it’s been over a decade but also it’s still considered like the primary text on npd and I #get the feeling the same debates are probably still going on #like I wish u all could understand. basically the only thing anyone seems to agree on is that the dsm IV (and considering the criteria for #diagnosis changed almost not at all between IV and V I imagine this still holds true) #is a BAD tool for diagnosing it. like the categorical model of diagnosis just doesn’t work well for personality disorders #plus the actual criteria listed for npd and many other pds in the dsm just straight up are not well grounded in actual scientific research #abt the disorders #and that’s what they agree on. as for the rest #NOBODY agrees on what inventories or models are effective & accurate NOBODY agrees on what the actual symptoms are beyond self #aggrandizement there’s a huge debate over whether there are subtypes of npd and if so what are they #and of those who DO believe in subtypes the most popular theory is grandiose vs vulnerable but THEN there’s a whole debate about THEM #bc some psychologists consider them two separate manifestations while others say that ppl with npd vacillate between the two states #and nobody can conclusively link self esteem with npd in any meaningful way other than that diagnosed ppl usually have higher surface level #self esteem but the whole concept of whether the narcisstic persona is a defense mechanism or just a delusion nobody can agree on or prove #and if ur wondering where the line is drawn between trait narcissism and npd ? buddy I’ve got bad news for you NOBODY KNOWS #like trait narcissism and npd are categorically two different things but the practical reality of someone with high trait narcissism vs npd #is just like. shrugs #and also high trait narcissism usually means scored high on the npi but hey guess what the npi has been HUGELY criticized and nobody can al #agree on how accurate it is!! #I could go on forever but u get the idea like. if you asked three different specialists in npd how they would define the disorder you would #VERY LIKELY get three completely different answers #and now. if ur sitting there wondering #hey wait a minute #but if the DSM V the official guideline for psychiatric evaluation infamously are not a good framework to diagnose pds or npd #AND if all other sources and experts have conflicting opinions #then WHAT is this disorder and HOW is it consistently diagnosed #AND IM WONDERING THE SAME DAMN THING!!!

[tortelorrini]

Man I love dndads season 2 I wish it was good

#sorryyyyyy you know I have to be on my shit again #(angry posting about Glenn close character assasination) #not defending Glenn or saying he’s a good person or dad #becuase he’s not either of those things but #cmon now folks do u not remember what ONE THIRD of season one is about #sorry glenn wouldn’t fucking do that!!!! the only thing he cares about is Nick!!!!! #once again season one literally ends w glenn going hey I know I’m not your father anymore but I still want to be in your life #I still want to put in the effort #just for him to end up at square one again the next time we see him???? #I’m not against a character getting worse #in fact I LOVE it it’s why I think scary and normals arcs are so interesting and fun #but that’s not where Glenn ended #you can’t just have him show up and go btw all the change u saw in season one wasn’t real #and actually he sucks worse now #nothing he went through or did matters lol #it’s dumb!!! #and it makes his WHOLE arc in season one #nothing but pointless martyrdom #sorry this is not really the most articulate #I’m just mad #how come all the other dads get to be their changed fully realized selves #but Glenn gets the shaft #not even saying you couldn’t do the whole ‘there’s no fixing this’ thing #it just should have been done a different way #Glenn could still have been there and Nick could have still held undealt with resentment from when Glenn wasn’t there before #anyway

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

my thasmin is just like,,, *tells you i love you in words that should mean the opposite. we understand each other perfectly*

#i just think it's a really interesting dynamic #we wont talk about Any Of This Between Us #but if you push them far enough #or yaz especially #then it's all 'wish i'd never met you' #or that other fic i wrote the other day where shes like 'fuck you kiss me' #we can only get there with a detour #never directly #or like. 13. when yaz even Slightly says something that Might hint at the doctor not feeling the same #or not even that just yaz going 'hey do you need some space bc i can give you space' #she gets MEAN jesus #i'll have her say stuff like 'because i want to spend LESS time with you?! i dONT' like it's a fight #like what is wrong with you babe <3 i love u #or in that other fic where yaz called her a coward and the doctor was just like 'yeah but you arent <3' #like ??? #fucking. opposite land between these two all the time #but they Know is the thing #they dont communicate about anything and they really should but they know Exactly what they mean in this every time #love them miss them

[toastsnaffler]

i keep getting irrationally miffed at ppl 😐😐

#'impressed by how much u can talk abt this considering youve not played either game' #fuck off. as if im not just trying to show interest bc u + another friend are both into them + constantly talk abt them in our gc!! #i mean since u guys talk abt them all the time + theyre huge on tumblr like. it would be hard for me to not know anything abt them at all #literally what else can i talk to u guys abt anyway. i dont think there are any interests i personally have that they both gaf abt #if anything they actively dislike most of the things im hyperfixated on. or at least she does so like i cant bring that up can i. #all i did was share a post i saw on tumblr that i thought was funny. its not like i had some negative/controversial opinion #i just saw it and thought hey that makes me think of my friends bc they like those things maybe theyll find it funny too!! #dog sitting outside the door with rly big sad eyes offering them a stick i found in a puddle #i like listening to them talk and i will eventually play some of the games theyre into myself cuz they make them sound rly cool #and even if theyre not my kind of thing i like sharing interests with other ppl and sometimes thats enough for me to be able to enjoy it #i literally own some of them already but im just not in the mental space to start smth new right now. which i have SAID!!!! #why do u even care girl. as if u dont already have a ton of friends playing it that ur talking to abt it???? i wont have anything to add #and thats not gonna stop u from being able to talk to me abt it anyway????? like 2/3 of our conversations atm are abt bg3 #man. i know its not that deep but it makes me kinda sad for some reason. im just trying. i guess next time ill just let u guys talk- #to each other or at me and not comment or say anything so u can pretend im not here or whatever it is u want #ughh. she probably didnt even mean it like that and ill feel stupid for getting annoyed and delete this later but whatever. #might work out early today and then i can like draw or play a game or smth the rest of the day. alright lets go #.vent #listening to my silly little jfunk/jazz/soul playlist and i already feel over it. healing

[biblicalhorror]

You ever had a friendship where like you kind of faded out of each other's lives for a period of time and then re-bonded without ever really addressing the distance so now every time one of you mentions something you never told the other one during The Dark Time you both just have to be like "yeah, this massive thing that happened to me that we didn't talk about at the time but I totally wanted to tell you about but it felt like I couldn't talk to you but I'm also not gonna say it was your fault because I don't want to drive you away again but I know and you know exactly what it is we're not talking about"

#like. i dont blame her for what happened #she was going through a lot of bullshit and i was getting into my current relationship with our mutual friend #and the mutual friend in question it turns out had rejected her like a month and a half before asking me out #so like. things were weird and i dont blame her for not wanting to make a whole thing out of it #and i also get how it would be hard to see me like that with someone you had interest in #but also from my perspective at the time i started dating a boy i liked and my best friend just decided she couldnt be around me anymore #and even though i now have the full context and it doesnt hurt as badly theres still a part of me carrying resentment over it #ive stopped pretending this is relatable content and now im just using the tags on this post as my diary #like on the one hand i know this friendship is worth it because we're stronger than ever now #and shes gotten so much better about vulnerability and admitting i matter to her and communicating in general #but on the other hand it just keeps feeling like theres this elephant in the room that neither one of us has any idea how to address #and like i dont even know if it would be better if we did address it #like 'hey btw i know you had a crush on my now bf and tried to kiss him one time and then didnt tell me when he shrugged you off' #'i also know how much you tried to pretend it didnt hurt you but you distanced yourself from half your friends to avoid having to face it' #'and at the time it was rly frustrating because you acted like me being happy in a healthy relationship was a personal inconvenience to u' #'but i understand now and i forgive you and im glad you came back around eventually because i love you and i missed you' #or can all of those things just remain unsaid and understood

[thedeadthree]

ENYA HAS A LOVE INTEREST AT LAST AND THEY ARE MAKING ME CRAZY 🤍🤍

#oc: valaenya targaryen #x: valaenya x aurane #they must be appreciated 🤍😌 #had to step back for a mini hiatus for a bit for health things again im so sorry ✨😖 TY TY FOR THE TAGS I CANT WAIT TO DO THEM YALL ARE DEARS #AND HE IS A VELARYON BASTARD A VELARYON ONLY THE BEST FOR THE BEST GIRL EVER! #reading into his lore kzjzjxjx i love him i love him ✨🥴 #HE REALLY WAS LIKE HEY CAN I HAVE SHIPS ROYAL NAVAL SHIPS AND THEN RAN OFF AND BECAME A PIRATE THAT LITTLE SKSJJXJXJX im screaming #i am manifesting he’s the lord of the waters bc the idea i have in mind of their first meeting is just……. i love it skjzjx #my dragon girl and her pirate boyfriend sksjjxj 🌊🐉🤍 #wakes up to his men yelling about a dragon seen in the skies LOSING it over purple scales (starspire) and he’s like ✨😏 oh interesting #starspire does the swanky thing she does where she positions her self in the sky wings extended suspended in the air appearing a star #before landing..! his crew was like this is where we die skxjxjjc it was simply for intimidation #I WONT SPOIL THE REST BUT she was sent by aegon vi the young griff and was also asked to look into the pirate king in the stepstones #by arianne m*artell as she wished to know who’s side he was on? #dany as well sent word to her as she’s a friend of hers as well ✨😌 she was intruiged! so she went! and the rest is history! 🤍 #and who better for both of them to let them know who’s side they were on then to send a dragon rider u know? #especially one who just so happens to wield dark sister and is the sword of the morning wielding dawn ✨😵‍💫 #SHES SO COOL darn me that she isn’t a canon character and i have to make the content myself ✨😒🥀❣️ #im so excited for what is in store for him especially if that’s him? and who’s side he’ll be on? if he chooses a side? #though like in any side he’s on he’s head over heels for enya (AS HE SHOULDD!) so! 🥀❣️😌 #D*AEMON AND IOVANNA WOULD BE SO PROUD OF YOU MY LOVE YOURE SO COOL ENYA ✨😌 #the singers are already calling her to be v*isenya born again ✨😖 #valaenyas allegiances are to dany and aegon and ultimately the restoration of the house ✨😌 besties with jon too! #a*urane @ enya: mark me down as scared AND into it sjxjjxjx ✨😵‍💫🥀👀🥴 #leg.txt

[judesstfrancis]

trying not to let it be feeling sorry for myself hours bc I'm too hot to do that anymore but goddamn

#u don't need a relationship to be happy blah blah blah blah blah this is about ME #I want to be held and told that I am adored. is that too much #like okay hey listen. I know I'm ace and gay and everything so there's a curve here but like dude come ON. I am nearly 25 #also they never tell u what it's like to be The Only Person u know who has never been in a relationship #interesting interesting anyway I am focusing this energy into other more important things and if u bring this up to my face I will deny it #text post

[orcelito]

also vaguely want a server for all my regular commenters and/or ppl who follow me on here. aka the ppl who give back to me & give me Motivation ... would love to have u guys around. u guys r great

#speculation nation #BUT AGAIN... THE RESPONSIBILITY... #also lmfao can u fuckin imagine if there was some kind of discacc exclusive club #only the True discacc fans get to join. or some bs like that lmao #ok but really tho can u imagine if u were like. a big fan of this giant piece of writing. #and then the writer just slides into ur dms like 'hey... wanna b part of my club...' i would either lose my mind or just b like 'wtf' #REALLY what this all is. i wanna b able to talk w/ readers more #i wanna know what people thinkkkkkkkk #and interacting w/ u guys as People & hearing ur thoughts about things im doing in the fic. decisions im making. #Feedback!!!!!!!! #and of course the thoughts of my favorite readers (aka ppl who comment every chapter lsjdfsdlks) r the most important #i guess half serious raising of the idea. if anyone is potentially interested let me know #otherwise uhhh just pretend u didnt see this lol

[violentviolette]

"telling someone incorrect information about a media franchise will never have the same potential for harm the way telling someone incorrect information about their mental health or illness or their loved ones murder will and i think its important to keep that perspective in these discussions. especially because i think the blurred line between media and real world topics, and people consuming real world topics the same way they do media, and treating them like they're essentially the same and approach researching them in the same way is a big part of this problem." I've been saying this for ages you are so real for this. It's genuinely a big issue that people have grown the tendency to compare every form of media that they consume to real life issues, which then desensitizes them to said real life issues. It's a big issue that people compare content relating to fictional characters who do not exist and are not sentient as on the same level as real, living and breathing people. Is it annoying when people mix fanon with canon to the point that the entire message behind a media has lost itself ? Yes, it very much is. But does that loss harm anyone on a physical, mental, emotional or psychological level ? Nowhere close. This technological age makes me so uneasy because of the ever increasing comparison of media to real life events, and the continuous belief that "fiction affects reality" + "fiction = reality." If fiction *does* genuinely affect reality, then that would mean violent video games inherently make someone violent and horror movies inherently make someone a murderer. I say that: if you already struggle with anger issues, exposing yourself to more violent forms of media without critical consumption will obviously worsen the symptoms, along with horror movies giving you ideas on how to kill that one relative you've fantasized killing for the past half decade—the only thing that affects reality are idiots who lack critical thinking. A comparison I can think of that people bring up to debate that "fiction affects reality" are the trends of fictional cats and rabbits consuming milk and carrots respectively. It's so silly because if you're planning to become a parent to an animal, it is your JOB to do research into that animal's diet, livelihood, habitat, body language etcetera. Why are you trusting the livelihood of a talking cartoon character ? Sorry for the long ask, but what you said is so important and I hope people adopt that mindset more, especially with this growing technological social media age.

no apologies neccessary anon u are absolutely correct and u should say it

media should not be where people are getting actual real life applicaple information. *no one* should look at a work of fiction in any form and just assume that whats being said or done is accurate information that they can just apply to their real life. and the same goes the other way around. when u want to research mental health topics or world history or a science, no one should be approaching it the same way as digging through their favorite shows wiki.

but there's been this huge kind of like. fandomification of social justice and social science and other topics like this where instead of understanding the critical nuance of these things and approaching them with a research minded perspective and an understanding of the nuance needed because so many things in real life are contradictory and complex and have eons of context, people approach them like tv shows. they think if they just read enough information and consume enough of the "content" surrounding it then they'll be able to fully understand and grasp them and then be able to educate others about them as some kind of authority and it just makes me want to scream from the rooftops that *thats not how any of this works*

the desensitization thing is also so real. u genuinely cannot have a single conversation about a real world topic without someone bringing up media and i dont know how else to nicely tell people that that is in no way relevent and actually actively harmful. trying to relate everything in life back to media and not being able to talk about a topic without including media will genuinely rot ur brain because it completely desensitizes u to the issue of harm. being wrong about media will never ever have the same impact that being wrong about mental health or physical health or animal welfare or public wellbeing will

#jack.speaks #anon #the original thing that prompted me to make that post was someone who was literally in mental health discord servers #telling teens completely incorrect and wrong information #about mental illnesses they thought they might have #and essentially misdiagnosing kids #and when i was like hey so ur completely wrong and what ur doing is really dangerous and potentially harmful to these ppl #they were like well my special interest is personalitty disorders so i know what im talking about #like!! bruh u are not a doctor because u read 20 wikipedia articles my guy!! #and then when i did criticize that response someone told me that i should at least be giving them credit and not devalue the hard work #they put in to learn that #and its like that is deranged!!! im not going to praise someone for spreading complete horseshit because their ego told them #that theyre essentially a dr now cause they did a lot of googling

[landofgay]

only problem with me and my bf moving in together: we can't cook 😩😩😩

#BUT the reason we dont cook is very similar: we live with family 🥴 #and dont like doing kitchen stuff with people Hovering #also i pointed out when i cook i get overwhelmed doing certain things by myself cause i cant get the timing right #and hes the same #so i think we will just try cooking together!!! #he's interested in eating plant based also which is good hehehe and I've made it clear that im not comfortable cooking meat #aside from like throwing a frozen thing in the oven i know how to do that #but i am not cooking like. Meat meat. unless he wants food poisoning or smth #im sure id do fine but i dont like cooking something i cant taste test myself!!!! also I've never cooked meat and never really #watched anyone cook meat. its just not safe i think :^) #anyways. sorry im so CHATTY today :^) have u guys missed meeeeee. hey why are you guys all pulling out weapons what did i d- *gunshots*

[spacedykez]

one day more people will know about aspecs. one day :(

#the otter splashes #the otter ventposts #i. i want to come out to my parents but i just. #my anxiety is so bad around it #like. i have identified as aroace for. god. how long now? i have no clue. its been uh. over six months at least #my parents: #1. are supportive of the queer community and would not be homophobic (i have been actively keeping note of this/scoping things out) #2. do not know anything about aspecs #3. assume i am simply a late bloomer like my mom. or dad does at least. he did not take the very obvious hints i tried to drop #i literally told him i was surprised that ppl my age were thinking abt romance bc ive never been interested and he just went 'oh yeah your #mom was like that' #and im here like. uh. mother. have. have you heard of the word aromantic- #of course she Hasn't but. like? the more i learn abt her the more im like. uh. you seem very arospec to me tbh. #im. i wonder if i could somehow like. teach them abt aspecs? is there some way i could subtly nudge them into learning about us? #google search how 2 teach ppl things without them suspecting u :sob: #how do i start a conversation like. hey have u heard of this thing. called asexuality. #IM TOO AWKWARD FOR THAT #i Think i could maybe. try. talking to my mom about it. in like. three months. maybe. #hhhhhhh #im so. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT #i wish i knew what to expect but i DONT and thats the worst thing

[churipu]

Idk if u take requests rn, but if you do, could you write fluffy moments with jjk men (pls include toji, i rlly wanna see him w fluff because there is like none) you fav would be cuddling, but you do whatever you want <3 Also, don't stress yourself when writing i, and please take breaks <33

JJK MEN + FLUFFY MOMENTS (๑ > ᴗ < ๑)

featuring. toji fushiguro, gojo satoru, nanami kento x reader

warnings. jjk men being softies

note. i just read the most heart wrenching nanami fic, i think i'm not okay at all </3 but hi anon, thank you for requesting this — this is exactly what i needed after reading angst. i apologize if it took a long time to get this out omg, i hope you like it.

and guys, omg???? 700+ followers? i genuinely never expected my works to be recognized by so much, and meeting new writers here and there, making friends, makes me so happy (i'm not crying) i love u all so so so so much, u guys rock, ily all <;33

TOJI FUSHIGURO

hated talking about the future, but ever since he met you — he rambles about it.

toji has always thought his future was nothing interesting, he kills people for a living, gets money off of it and he gambles. that's about it, so what was there to think about in the future?

meeting you was the firsts to a lot of things in his life.

toji grew up in a loveless household full of anger, and lust for power. which is why he is who he is today. distant, aloof, detached. people tell him he'd be nothing without his strength and face, there is no denying that toji fushiguro has a face card. he knows that.

so when he first met you, all he expected was like every other day. people caring about his face, and only that — and he'd play along although he's had enough of it, but no; you didn't care about all that.

face, money, strength. none of that.

he vaguely remembered the first time you spoke to him: "hey, mind helping me grab that box of cereal?" and he expected you to hit on him after, but you left it at that, muttering out a thanks and then leaving him in the aisle alone.

then for some reason he meets you again, the very next month. asking him the exact same thing, asking for help to take the cereal box which happened to be on the very top of the shelf. god knows why, both you and him just made it a routine every month after that. no communications about meeting and all. you both kind of just, met right in the cereal aisle on one particular day in the month, and then leave.

on the fifth month, he finally asks for your number.

"toji, is that your way of asking me out? because if it is, i'm disappointed."

"maybe."

and then you both kind of just sealed it; you're dating. nothing much changed, every month both you and him still go to the cereal aisle — he still helps you with grabbing the box from the shelf. the only difference was that now the two of you leave together.

toji hates talking about his future. but with you? he could go on for a whole day. he rambles about what he thinks and what he wants in the future with you.

"i wan' to get married. i wan' to marry you," did it caught you by surprise? yes. yes it did, "i wan' to have a family with you, a nice little family. i wan' to have a son so i could throw him around — but a girl is okay too, i can protect her from boys, i'll love them both equally. but i don't think i'll be a good dad to them. i'm scared they won't like me."

"toji, what? where did that come from?"

his back was pressed to your chest as you both lay down on the bed, one of your leg draped over his torso and he has his hand on your plush thigh, squeezing it every once in a while.

"i don't know. just a thought, i never talked about my future with anyone before," his body vibrated as he grunted, leaning his head back a bit, "i just don't think i'll be a good father, y'know?" he squeezed your thigh.

"why do you think so?" you asked him, placing your chin on the crown of his head.

"i just think so."

"stop thinking then," you chuckles, draping an arm around his neck, caressing his throat so softly it made the male shudder under your touch — but he didn't mind, he took comfort under your skin.

"can't." his voice was not stern or bold, it was soft and serene. he laced his fingers with yours, kissing your knuckles gently, "i can't believe 'm saying this, but 'm worried about my future. 'm a little scared."

just the fact he was admitting that he's scared about something was mind boggling, because the toji fushiguro? who kills people? was admitting that he was actually terrified of something, which wasn't even the strongest sorcerer. it's his future.

you were silent, letting him talk because when else would he be able to be like this?

"'m terrified. 'm scared i won't make you happy. what if i don't make you happy? what if my kids hate me?" so many questions that you don't even have the answer to, but you placed your hand over his lips, shutting him up.

toji grumbled, he swiped his tongue over your palm.

"ew!" you laugh, wiping your hand on his shirt, "but why're you suddenly talking about this all? which videos have you been watching again?"

"nothing, can't i think about my own future with you?" he shuffles, turning to face you, prepping an arm under his head as he stares down at you. not in the condescending way — he stared at you with so much desperation for love, he slowly blinks, the glint in his eyes never changing.

"why out of the blue?"

"jus' because."

you poked his cheek, "liar."

he sighs, latching his hand onto your hips, pulling you close. he buries his head into your shoulder in content, "jus' worried about it, i never think about my future in the past. but now — with you, i jus' worry about it because i didn't think i'd make it 'till now."

you chuckled, rubbing the back of his head lightly, "you remember that one time in the park when you see that little boy crying over spilled ice cream?"

he hums softly.

"and you bought him another ice cream, but asked me to be the one to give it to him because you were scared you'd scare him off instead?" you ask him, your fingers tangling with his hair lightly.

"yeah."

"you'll be fine, toji." you tell him.

"y'think so?" he retorts back, squirming a bit.

"i know so."

GOJO SATORU

he has to know about everything that you like, he needs to know why you like them. every. single. thing.

gojo chased after you. you were one tough cookie, he likes a chase. he's so used to people fawning over his looks that when you didn't — he just has to know your name.

the curiosity to know your name ended up pulling him in a spiral of this little thing called "love". gojo swore it was just curiosity, but everyone else besides him thinks otherwise, he promised himself and people around that he didn't like you, he was just, well, curious.

but curiosity doesn't look like that. gojo finds himself asking people about what type of boys you like, and when he finds out about it — he tries his best to be your type. he promised he was just curious.

gojo tries finding out what your favorite flower is, and when he finds out about it, he's out there sending big bouquets of it to you. he promised he was just curious.

gojo tries finding out what your favorite genre of music is, and when he finds out, he listens to them so he could talk about it with you. he promised he was just curious.

gojo tries finding out what your favorite series or movie is, and when he finds out, he watches them all intently so he could talk about them with you and hate on characters together with you. and he still promises that he was just curious.

he was just curious, he kept telling that to himself. so why does it bother him when you were out with another guy? another guy that's not him. not gojo satoru.

gojo asks you about who it was, and when you tell him it's nobody important, he gets upset about it.

"why are you so upset?"

"i'm just..curious."

"it's none of your business."

he left it at that. his whole week was ruined, he couldn't stop thinking about it. about you. and then he finally realizes, he wasn't curious — he was in love. so there he was, in front of your door at two in the morning.

"what?"

"who was that guy?"

"gojo, you're still onto that?" you ask him, tired, "i said it's none of your business. you're here at two just to ask me about that?"

"it's my business because i'm in love with you, damn it!"

gojo was half grateful when you told him it was your distant cousin, but half embarrassed as well. all's well ends well. he gets you in the end, and he doesn't have to worry about anything else — nothing in the world matters to him but you.

"baby, what do you recommend?" was one of the most spoken phrases he has delivered to you.

in restaurants, dessert bars, convenience store, movie theaters, anything you could recommend him, he'd ask for it.

"why do you always ask? don't you have your own preference, satoru? i'm not even sure if you'll like my recommendations though," he smiles at you, tracing small circled on the back of your hand.

"i want to know about everything that you like, and why you like them. i want to know everything about you," you look at him and smiled, honestly, what did we ever do to deserve him?

"why?"

"because i love you." yeah, he wasn't just curious. he's in love. and deep.

NANAMI KENTO

he always orders food that you like, and shares some with you — even if you didn't ask for it.

nanami never expected to be in relationships. in fact, relationships was the last thing in his mind — but when he met you, he just kind of felt attracted. he seeks for your comfort whenever he's tired, and when you weren't there, nanami just sort of drowns in himself until he could see you or hear your voice.

at the beginning of your relationship, nanami was never the one to initiate things because he wasn't an experienced male in relationships. you ask him and he just sort of do it without any other complaints.

but as time goes on, he get the hang of it. what he should do and what he shouldn't — it's adorable, he's started doing things that he never thought he would do in his life, but here he was sitting by your side; peeling apples for you because you wanted them.

"kento, eat some. it's going to be finished by the time you finish peeling every one of them," you joked, your legs on top of his thighs.

nanami hums softly, "it's okay. as long as you like it."

nanami doesn't realize the weigh of his sweet words sometimes, he does it and asks himself to why you were reacting like that. sweet talk is his vocabulary. he says it with no worries, telling you things you've always wanted to hear but never say.

but one thing that always stuck to him and you from the first time you got close up to now was: nanami always orders things that you like. you never understood the reason behind it, and when you tried asking him about it, he just tells you he was craving it.

it didn't seem odd at first — but as time goes on, his whole taste was just an exact copy of yours.

if you get something different than your usual menu, nanami will get your usual menu because he knows damn well that you're going to end up wanting them. although you don't tell him when the food comes, nanami makes it his job to share with you. and that's really sweet of him.

but when you get your usual menu, nanami orders something with elements that you like in them and shares them with you even without you asking for a bite. and not only that, he didn't share a spoonful — he shared a lot.

"ken, you don't have to share with me. i have my own food." you tell him, despite your heart tugging you to just let him share because you were too shy to say that you wanted a bite.

"it's alright sweetheart. i'm a little full." he lies. he ends up snacking on something on midnight, and it's now a routine.

so in exchange for that, you always make it your job to stock up foods ranging from small snacks like biscuits, chips, up to instant or pre-heated food. even cutting up fruits so nanami could snack on it, and he caught on to it pretty quick.

but he didn't complain, he likes it when you do it.

"ken, i cut out some mangoes and dragon fruit. you can eat them if you're hungry."

"thank you y/n."

mutual wins.

© CHURIPU 2023 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #fluff #jjk #jjk fluff #gojo fluff #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro #toji fluff #toji #nanami kento #kento nanami #nanamin #nanami kento x reader #nanami #i love nanami and i miss my pookie bear