#i can't cook

[diggykit-kat]

My eggs ☹️

#my eggs #eggs #i can't cook #boiled eggs #funny memes #memes #cooking #cheif #a five minute egg #shit #master cook #kiss the cook

[hearts4court]

trying to cook today. if i burn my apartment down— oh well.

#i can't cook #i might burn my house down

[pia-writes-things]

I can't seem to be able to do anything for the second or third evening in a row, I don't know if it's because I'm tired, lazy or the executive dysfunction I may or may not have, and at this point I'm too afraid to as tbh

#pia's venting again #i can't cook #i can't work on my master's thesis #i can't wash the dishes #i can't study for next week's finals #i can't read #i just scroll mindlessly #and i feel like shit #i love my life

[wise-emperor]

the amount of shade

#mike huttlestone #jamie spafford #barry taylor #ben ebbrell #Tom Scott plus #tom scott #gif #funny #lol #the shade #salty mike #sortedfood #I can't cook #but the person in my ear can #cooking show #wise-emperor

[cartoonradfem]

woke up at midnite, made rice and poured some packet butter chicken sauce on it and truly realized how much better it is when my bf makes it.

#I can't cook #I don't want to #he is such a good cook! #it's so sad without whatever the fuck he does to it

[hesawiggly-snig]

.... yum 😞

#cooking with benny #i can't cook #cinnamon roll #this looks like dog shit #ITS NOT EVEN A ROLL AND IT WASNT EVEN EDIBLE WTF #CINNAMON SLOB.

[miss-nichita]

I made an omelette one day...

#another college assignement #I have so many anecdotal stories i can use to make mini comics #but i gotta get into them again... #maybe one day #comics #comic #mini comic #two page comic #omelettes #omelette #cooking #i can't cook #nichi illustrations #i really thought i could do it again once i mastered it the one time #oh well #i tried #illustration #art #ink #traditional art

[wenumsmol]

oversalted my fish and now i wanna kms

#smol talk༺𖤐 #smol rant༺𖤐 #this is why i don't cook #gimme some takeout #I can't cook #please kill me

[bizarrelittlemew]

i dreamt that i fixed my stove somehow. woke up and my stove is still broken and not magically fixed through dream power. disappointing

#i can't cook #it's microwave meals and toast #and cup noodles #my husband suggested getting an air fryer instead of a new oven?? babe #i have a type #personal #🐭📓

[gayness-and-mayhem]

Who knew it was possible to get so invested in a weird little biscuit documentary with Nigel Slater.

#Also you have no idea how much I want ''shit and shagging dogs'' to be the new cry of exasperation #Incredible #I love Nigel Slater so much actually and idk why I'm suddenly back round to this but hey I can't complain bc he's cool #Nigel Slater #I don't even cook #I can't cook #But my love of Nigel Slater was originally born out of my dad's dislike of him and then it escalated and if there's one person who could #actually convince me to have a go at cooking it would be him #I'm having a weird day sorry lol I'm currently procrastinating an Accent and Dialect essay which I don't feel I actually have the knowledge #to complete but oh well it'll all be fine not like it's due for Friday or anything... #What do you mean - of course I'm not panicking. Not at all!! #:)) #Text post

[boycigs]

yawl ,,, hangs head ,, I messed up making pasta

#i literally put thr water on thr stove and put the past in before i even turned on thr burner #at least i put salt in the water #sigh #i can't cook #except for deserts and breads #i can't cook alas i can bake

[spyglassrealms]

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

#normally I don't chronicle my dreams here but fucking hell that one was funny #I think this would genuinely make tumblr better tbh #@ staff do this cowards #spy has thoughts #my life is a sitcom and i am my own laugh track #functional website #spy's smash hits #Glock function #edit for everyone in the notes saying 'everyone clapped' #I know I can't prove to you that it happened for real you're just gonna have to trust me on this #but I swear on my goddamn life I'm not making this up #I make so many conscious puns that sometimes my subconscious cooks up a real good one

[acutiecupid]

Pickle fail(potentially)

There's this local restaurant that has these really good half sour pickles that I'm mildly obsessed with. Basically I decided to try and make some at home... Only to learn apparently there are cucumbers specifically for pickling?! That would have been great to know in the recipe, since I used normal cucumbers. We'll see how they turn out in three days. The worst part is my cousin literally OWNS the franchise and I could've just asked him.

#I can't cook #dill pickles #food fail #maybe but who knows #kitchen shennanigans #the pickle saga

[tapakah0]

#cass fanart tag #I OVE THEM YOUR HONOR #Raph just casually taking all sleepy heads from bad and bringing them to breakfast #Leo CAN cook I'm sure not so good as Mikey but CAN #Donnie can't #*pffft* #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #future raph #future mikey

[theeminentlyimpractical]

“why does the fandom portray Aziraphale as such an idiot when he is canonically intelligent”

today a colleague with an engineering phd had a wasp get in his car and drove around with his door open until it flew out and only realized like 10 minutes later he could have rolled down the windows, next question

#the smartest people I know are also complete morons #I once watched the cafeteria woman explain how eggs are cooked to a grown man #good omens #aziraphale can't help it my man has unmedicated angel adhd #also it’s foreplay

[ink-ghoul]

For the past days I've been gathering references for like 10 different art pieces but I've started none of them

#ink.text #uuuughhhghgh #I have a couple 3d models I made for base there and some couple palettes on the other side #I feel like when you look at the fridge for hours but can't bring yourself to cook