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muneca-lemon-steppa · 4 months

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can i just say that i am OBSESSED with your Alfie series. literally cannot get enough of it. Also!! Was wondering if you could write a fluff piece were reader gets injured and alfie comes to her rescuee? Your writing is so good <3

Hi my love! This ask was so so sweet! I am so glad you like the series, it was so much fun to share it with you guys, I know I tell y'all all the time but it's true! My heart is just so full I can't help it! And of course I can write some fluff! You know I love it hehe. I'm sorry this took a while but I hope you like it! This was actually inspired by my Thanksgiving fiasco this past year lmao. I was in charge of the turkey, mac and cheese, dessert, and potatoes. My little brother was my sous chef and I completely cut my thumb open and my brother almost passed out lmao. Anyway, sending all my love to you! - Mo

Ouch

Alfie Solomons x F!Reader, fluff, Warnings: injury, mentions of blood

There is something so soothing about the kitchen. When the world is so chaotic and cold and uncertain, the kitchen is a haven. Here it’s safe and warm and systematic. The chops and bubbling of the stove are so rhythmic, any harshness of the day just falling off your shoulders in waves. Because here you could understand and set the temperature. Here you could control the outcome and be free. Even if you were trying something new, you could be confident in the knowledge that it would always have a good outcome. It was your favorite part of the day, just cooking with Alfie. You on one side with Alfie on the opposite, working separately to jointly create beautiful.

The only problem that came with cooking, was that it was a little too peaceful. You became too relaxed. And as Alfie was apt to remind you, it wasn’t good to be too relaxed around knives and hot stoves. But it was too easy. The steady hum of the fire and boiling. The pattern you’ve gone through many a time. Your body would take over like a dance from your childhood. Your hands knew what they were doing. Your mind could take a break. And she would wander. Things to be completed in the office tomorrow. That new quilt you were making for your mother. Alfie needing a haircut.

Stir.

I need to make time for that book this weekend

Pour.

Alfie looked so handsome today if it weren’t for that awful stain on his shirt

Stir

Mama and Papa asked us to come for Shabbat this week. I need to tell Alfie.

Chop

We should go to the park this week

Chop

I wonder if we can visit Rabbi Reuben as well

Chop

Alfie’s birthday is also coming up

Chop

I’m so excited for his birthday surprise

Slice

“AH!!! Oh God ah!!”

A long and deep line blossoms on your palm. Far too entrenched in your mind, you were completely missing how the knife was getting closer and closer to your hand. You quickly grab a nearby dish towel, tightly wrapping your hand to catch the trickle dripping to the wood on the floor. Alfie is quick to you though, loudly dropping the cutlery and bowl he was holding. "Shit! Sweet heart you alright? What d'ya do to yourself?"

"Nothing nothing Alfie darling! Just a little scrape I'm sorry!"

Alfie peered at the slowly soaking dishtowel and raised his thick blonde brows at you. Mustache quirking, indicating that once again, you are a terrible liar. Gently but without holding room for argument he unraveled your makeshift bandage as you winced. His mouth furrowed and grumbled, "Ah shit treacle. This is why I always tell you right? You can't be all day dreaming when you're working in here! You insist on not letting me help ya, and then there you go fucking filleting yourself!"

Cool tears start trickling down. It burned with the introduction of the air and the embarrasment of getting a nasty cut. Alfie sighed, wiping your tears with one hand has he cradled your injury in the other. If there was one thing he hated most in the world, it was seeing you cry. "Aw my dove, no tears yeah? Not too bad ain't it? Why I don't even think it'll need a stitch I wager. Just a little alcohol on it and a bandage and you'll be right as rain. C'mon my angel, let's get you better aye? Dinner can wait a few minutes."

Despite having a terrible temper and being completely and utterly impatient... Alfie Solomons was an incredibly gentle and tender nurse. Stern. Always stern. And teasing. And scolding. But gentle above all else. You winced and shed a small tear when Alfie poured the clear and horrendous smelling alcohol on your wound. He tutted and kissed your temple all the while telling you, "Maybe this'll teach you eh? Nothing like a war would to make you more smart about your surroundings."

You thanked your lucky stars you didn't need a stitch at all. Despite the blood it was really a shallow cut. Alfie wrapped your hand skillfully. Pressing a kiss right over the bandage as the final salve. As you whispered a chaste thank you, Alfie pulled you into his chest saying, "Now listen my dove. I don't like to baby you. You are a grown woman and I'm not one to tell woman how to conduct herself or her affairs. But I get worried about you. Always drifting off somewhere in that pretty head. Not watching yourself. Not wanting help. You have got to let me help you my darling. Yeah?"

You nod, kissing him to assure him that you are ok. He chuckles kissing you back. Pushing you to the dining room chair he teases you further, "Now my dear patient, it is imperative that you sit there and keep that hand elevated. Lots of rest of relaxation yeah?"

"Alfie! I have to finish dinner!"

"No I'm sorry treacle but it is the doctor's orders! Can't have you losing a finger next can we?"

You laugh and argue with him, eventually get him to compromise to allowing you to fill a pitcher with water and set the kettle on. No matter what the others of Camden said, they could never say that he wasn't a good man.

#alfie solomons #alfie solomons x reader #alfie solomons x you #alfie solomons fanfic #alfie solomons x y/n #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinders #tom hardy

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mariaofdoranelle · 1 year

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Faking Yulemas — Part 3: Chestnut Roasted

For 12 Days of Rowaelin

Prompt: Accidental Mistletoe

Fic masterlist

Look, I’m not taking Lyria very seriously here. You’ll understand what I mean soon.

Also, I’m going to defend myself by saying that I’m not putting women against each other because there was never a competition lmao

Warnings: language, a bruise, haircut without consent

Word count: 3k exactly

Aelin was incredibly cranky after a completely restless night and dodging the cuddle monster that took over Rowan’s body while he was asleep, but she was fine. Rowan asked his doctor cousin-in-law to bring her sleeping pills on his way here. It would be fine. She could do a lot of things today, but let her bad mood ruin this for Rowan wasn’t one of them.

It was hard to play nice little girlfriend with someone as bitchy as Maeve, but she would manage.

“So you really can’t do anything?”

Aelin’s jaw was sore from the clenching she tried not to do during breakfast, but it was useless. Deep breaths. Where the hell was Rowan? Deep, deep breaths.

“Aelin’s super smart. She actually reads things that aren’t on a Twitter thread. And it’s not like we can do a lot either, auntie.” Sellene tried to defend her between sips of coffee. She didn’t need to, but Aelin’s eyes still softened a little to hear that.

Even so, Maeve sighed. “I didn’t choose to be attached to you all, Sellene.”

Her friend snorted and went back to her breakfast, probably used to Maeve by now. Aelin wasn’t. She wore a false smile and focused back on her food. It would be a terrible move to snap at Rowan’s old aunt that didn’t look like a criminal, but surely was bitchy enough to be. For Mala’s sake, that woman stood out like a sore thumb between the Whitethorns.

To make a good impression, she needed to think. She couldn’t cook, often messed up her laundry, barely had the skills to take care of herself. Was she really that useless?

Then Aelin’s eyes lit up and she looked directly at Maeve. “I can play the piano.”

That owned her a close-lipped smile. “I have a piano upstairs. I want to see what you can do with it before dinner.”

Aelin nodded, her heartbeat starting to pick up, but the smile on her face didn’t falter. She had sold Uncle Orlon’s piano out of necessity when it became just Aedion and her, and didn’t get to play much after that. Aelin was making a mental note to find that piano and practice a little so she wouldn’t look that rusty when another person with silver-hair and pine green eyes came in.

“Enda!” Sellene’s eyes lit up and she almost fell over while rushing to hug him.

Oh, thank Mala. If Enda was here, that means his husband was close-by, hopefully with her sleeping pills. Aelin would give herself the luxury of sleeping early today, after she proved her worth to fucking aunt Maeve by playing the piano.

When Aelin got up to introduce herself, Enda was already looking at her with a fond smile. “You must be Aelin.”

After exchanging a few pleasantries and receiving a small plastic bag with her salvation pills, someone cleared their throat near them. A girl with chestnut eyes and curls that Aelin had no idea who she was.

“I’m Lyria. You probably heard about me already.” She extended a hand.

Wait. Wasn’t she supposed to come only tomorrow?

Aelin flinched for a millisecond, but it was enough to make Lyria’s smile grow.

“Okaaay,” Enda dragged it out as he slowly left. Good for him. Aelin would be leaving too if she hadn’t specifically signed up for this. Helping Rowan with his ex.

She cautiously shook Lyria’s hand. “I thought you were coming tomorrow.”

“Rory texted me yesterday to clarify the guest situation, and slipped that Enda was coming today. He was kind enough to give me a ride.”

Aelin’s eyebrows raised. “Is that so?” She’s desperate enough to come earlier once she hears Aelin’s there. Interesting.

Tossing her curls back, Lyria’s smirk never faltered. “Of course! I didn’t see any trace of you on Rowan’s Instagram, but I understood it on the car ride. It’s very honorable what Rowan’s doing.”

Fuck. They needed to sort the Instagram thing fast. But Aelin tilted her head, trying to fully understand what she’d said, when Lyria’s smile grew as she pointed a look at the bag with pills on Aelin’s hand.”

“Dating the mentally ill. It can be a handful.”

“Excuse—“

“But it’s Yulemas, after all! Everyone has its own way of doing charity.”

What the actual fuck?

“Wait a second.” She tilted her head, frowning in mock-confusion. “Is that why he keeps rejecting you? Because the charity deadline is over?”

Lyria gaped, and when she opened her mouth to speak, they were saved by Sellene asking if they wanted to have more food. Thank God.

“Sure, but can someone grab a plate for me?” Lyria pointed at the cabinet and aimed doe eyes at them. “I’m too short.”

Sellene seemed to try not to sigh too loudly and pointed at a nearby table. “There’s literally dozens of plates piled up there.”

“Oh!” She giggled. “Sorry, I didn’t see them.”

It was very hard not to, but Aelin had many things to fret about already.

First, the fact that Lyria was a complete nightmare. A fucking pick-me girl that she had to deal with the on the day she hadn’t slept all night—and not for a good reason.

And there was also the Instagram issue, but their “relationship” was new enough that it wasn’t a huge deal for now.

Rowan finally appeared, wearing a mouth-watering white shirt and a small smile aimed a her, his green eyes sparking under the sunlight that came through the window.

However, his joyful expression faltered when a high-pitched voice squealed, “Rowie!”

Lyria got up in a bolt and hugged him, trying to wrap her legs around him, but Rowan didn’t pick her up. Instead, he wordlessly unwrapped her arms off him and gave her two taps on the shoulder.

Sellene seemed to be choking as she tried to suppress her laughter. But Aelin didn’t check on her friend, too busy staring at Lyria’s hand gripping Rowan’s arms.

And it was okay to glower, Aelin thought. She was his girlfriend, after all. That’s what a girlfriend would do. Maybe her acting skills were so good that she was doing it without even planning.

Acting or not, Aelin wanted to burn Lyria’s hands off Rowan.

The feeling partially vanished when he quickly ceased the conversation and sat by her side, though. Good. Aelin knew she was only playing fake girlfriend so Rowan could avoid his ex, but she didn’t want to look bad because he was giving too much attention to Lyria. Her slightly alarmed state was just Aelin trying to protect her dignity. No biggie.

˜˜

Even the winter was hot in Doranelle, so Sellene decided to go to the pool and demanded that Aelin and Rowan would come with her. She would rather stay inside and see how she’s doing with the piano, but Owen saved them by inviting Lyria to finish decorations along with him and Rory, and she’d give anything to stay away from her.

Now Aelin was in the bathroom near the pool, changing. She had brought two bikinis, a red one and a green one. Her first instinct was to get the red, but she stopped herself. It wasn’t like Aelin was trying to seduce anyone. Who was there to be seduced, old aunt Maeve? Nuh-uh. No one. Did she want to wear something extra to maybe, just maybe reassure Rowan that there was more in the world than pick-me girls and bouncy chestnut curls? Yes, but it wasn’t like that. Aelin wanted to look hot for him as a friendly reminder, that’s all.

In the end, she chose the classic triangle tie side set, plain dark green. She looked hot, but not teasing hot. Aelin was adjusting her hair and retouching her very natural, I-woke-up-like-this makeup for herself. In a feminist, self-love way. Definitely not because she wanted her not-boyfriend drooling over her.

She went outside and Sel was already at the pool, but where was Rowan? She could hear a sound of water falling, so she followed the sound and—

Dear Mala.

Her not-boyfriend was in the pool shower because of course drill sergeant, neat freak Rowan would hop in the shower before jumping into the pool. Aelin held in a breath when she noticed the trail the water did around muscles she thought were myths, how good the tan skin of his naked upper body looked under the Doranellian sun. She unconsciously licked her lips just to think how good all of this would look underneath her.

There was no time to chastise herself for these thoughts, because when Rowan looked up and saw her, his eyes darkened just the same. Aelin was walking towards him with purposeful steps, and she didn’t miss how the rhythm of his breathing changed, by the movements of his chest. How he shut off the water without taking his eyes off her, and then ran a hand through his wet hair, sending the blonde strands away from his eyes.

Aelin had her own completely trained on Rowan when she slipped and fell straight into the pool.

Well, not straight into the pool. She managed to bump her hip against the edge before going all in.

“Oh my God!” She faintly heard Sellene scream from underwater, and both her best friend and not-boyfriend were coming her way and checking if she was okay.

“I’m fine, I promise,” Aelin reassured them, “I might’ve bruised my hip, but it barely hurts.”

Sel and Rowan exchanged a look. “I’m getting an ice pack,” her friend said before going towards the mansion, leaving her and Rowan alone.

He mentioned for her to get closer, and then picked Aelin up from the pool and sat her by his side. After that, he got up and extended an hand so she could do it too, but didn’t release it. He led her hand in hand towards a pool lounge chair and mentioned for her to sit there. Once she did, Rowan crouched on her side and slightly moved her bikini’s feeble string, making her skin burn whenever he touched.

It was just so he could assess the damage. Rowan was being respectful. There was no need for her stupid blood vessels to make her blush like that.

He probably didn’t notice it, by the frown he had while staring at her hip. “You’re injured.”

Aelin snorted. “I have one bruised hip.”

“One very bruised hip.”

Before she could prove her own well-being, she saw Sellene coming their way, holding the ice pack.

“I also brought the speaker. taylor swift: petty jilted lover edition?”

Aelin hummed and tapped her chin, thoughtful. She did listen to that playlist a lot this year, but she wasn’t in the mood for it.

“I made a new one. It’s called labyrinth by taylor swift type of shit,” Aelin answered.

Sellene’s eyebrows went up, and Aelin narrowed her eyes. It would look like a battle of wills if the corner of her friend’s lips weren’t tugging up, a sign that she was biting back a smirk.

Instead of insisting on this weird exchange, Sellene turned to her cousin. “Are you okay with Taylor Swift this time?”

Rowan shrugged and sat on the long lounge chair. The same one Aelin was currently in.

Sellene opened her mouth to speak, but closed it when received a long look from Aelin. Instead, she just smirked and left to set the speaker.

“You need to actually put the ice pack for it to work, you know.”

Aelin blinked and noticed that yes, she was so distracted she ended up only holding it, without pressing against the bruise.

When she started to move, Rowan adjusted himself in the seat, legs opened, and mentioned for her to seat between them.

Oh, God. Her heart picked up again. Aelin carefully sat there, her back against his chest, and it only took a small caress of his hand against her shoulder for her to relax there.

Noticing that she’d become distracted again, he gently took the ice pack from her hand and rearranged their position so he could press it against her injury himself.

“Buzzard,” she murmured while watching Sellene scroll through her phone in the pool.

“What did you call me?”

She turned around to see his widened eyes and smiled. Boldened, Aelin bumped his nose and said, “A very fussy Buzzard.”

˜˜

For someone who practically ordered her to go to the pool, Sellene got tired of it quite early. Aelin didn’t mind it, though. At least it gave her time to practice the piano. Or would.

Rowan didn’t look for his family after the pool, knowing Lyria would be with them. Instead, he said he’d watch Aelin play in the piano room after they took turns in their suite’s shower.

She started with the Stygian Suite and only played it once, because Rowan sat by her side immediately after and asked her to teach him. Aelin felt her chest warming up every time he frowned in concentration or asked her a question, but the hardest part was biting back her silly grins at his clumsy playing. He was cute enough to make up for it, though. Objectively speaking. Objectively, Rowan was cute. Not that it affected her patience with him. Aelin was teaching him the same way she’d teach a cute or uncute person.

Unfortunately, Aelin had to cut the piano lesson short to go to her room and get a few sheets on her iPad. Cheesy or not, she wanted to play Yulemas songs for the Whitethorns. She just needed to discuss which ones with Ro—

“My chest is no an armrest, Lyria” Aelin heard the voice of her not-boyfriend in the hallway.

“We’re under the mistletoe. You’re going to ignore that?”

“Yes? You cornered me here!”

Aelin was grinding her teeth together, heat rushing through her body. That’s it. She needed Lyria gone. Very quietly, she sneaked her way to the piano room. But she needed something first. Thankfully, it was close to the door.

“Ro, I know you. You can’t be this unaffected.”

Lyria was making decorations earlier with Rowan’s parents, and now Aelin didn’t doubt the reason so many mistletoes were added. Good thing they left a sharp pair of scissors behind.

“You think- Stop grabbing me!” Rowan snapped. “You think I care about a mistletoe more than I care about my girlfriend?”

“But it’s a tradition!”

”You dumb. Fucking. Bitch,” Aelin snarled the last word while cutting a chunk of her chestnut curls off.

Lyria’s eyes went wide, watching a strand of her hair fall to the floor. “Oh my God! What do you think you’re doing?”

She gestured to the doors with the scissors. “I’m kicking you out.”

“You can’t do that!” Lyria turned to Rowan for reassurance, but he was grinning like Hellas himself. “I’m Rory’s guest! You literally can’t do that!”

Resorting to Rowan’s mama, huh? Pathetic.

Aelin tilted her head and whispered, “I don’t think she’ll be here when I shave your head bald, Lyria.”

Just to prove a point, she cut another strand of her hair. A bigger one this time.

Lyria screamed so loud Rowan cringed.

Aelin was completely unaffected, though. She grabbed Lyria by the hair with one hand, scissors on the other, and pulled her down the hallway. She didn’t physically fight it, so pulling Lyria by a hair that long was more like walking a puppy that doesn’t know how to use a leash. Easy.

She fought Aelin with words, though.

“OH MY GOD,” Lyria screamed. “SOMEBODY HELP ME!”

Aelin rolled her eyes and turned to Rowan, who was right behind them. “Get her things upstairs. We’re taking her to the bus station.”

“HEEELP!” She looked at Aelin. “You’re… You’re crazy!” Lyria shouted at the end.

She held the scissors dangerously close to the brunette’s hair, making her eyes go wide. “And you don’t want to mess with the crazy bitch on Yulemas, right?”

They kept like this until Enda and his husband came running their way, and then stopped. Rowan’s cousin sighed and screamed, “It’s okay, you can come!”

“SHE’S TRY’NA KILL ME!”

Aelin rolled her eyes. How was Lyria’s throat still intact?

Rowan’s parents arrived looking completely ashen. Sellene had a hand over her mouth, shoulders shaking.

Rory cleared her throat. “What’s going on?”

Lyria’s eyes widened. “She’s mental,” she whisper-yelled.

Aelin sighed and tried to look at herself through someone else’s eyes. Lyria’s hair on one hand, scissors still on the other. Yeah, it didn’t look good.

“This stupid b-“ Aelin paused. She didn’t want to curse that bad in front of Rowan’s family. “There was a stupid glitch. Lyria was hitting on my boyfriend. We’re taking her to the bus station.”

Rory blinked, trying to process this. Owen was biting his lip, and he seemed to struggle with the corners of his mouth tugging up. Interesting.

“Aelin, can you release Lyria, please?” Rowan’s mom asked.

She felt Rowan’s squeeze on her shoulder, and thanked the gods he was back. Aelin complied and let her go, holding her hands—and scissors—up in surrender.

Lyria turned to look at Aelin, a smug smirk in her lips.

However, Rory didn’t stop there. “Lyria, dear, to avoid causing further issues…”

“You’re kicking me out?” she spoke in a quiet voice for once.

“No…” Rowan’s mom trailed, grimacing. “I’ll be glad to have you here once things between you three have… settled. I just think it’s best for everyone to avoid conflict during Yulemas.”

Lyria froze, looking at Rory with shiny eyes, but thankfully his mom didn’t balk.

“Gimme that,” Rowan’s dad quietly said, getting Lyria’s things from his son’s hand. “We’ve got it from here.”

Aelin turned around and started walking like nothing happened. Her job here was done.

”You’re something else, Aelin Galathynius,” Rowan marveled when they were out of earshot.

She had a cocky grin on. “I know.”

Rowan chuckled and squeezed her hand. “Thank you.”

Aelin didn’t do anything. Which means that she also didn’t let go of his hand while they walked towards their bedroom.

There was a possibility that she’d remember this tomorrow and think she could’ve handled the Lyria situation better. But what could Aelin do? Everyone knows she gets cranky when she doesn’t sleep well.

A/N: I did prepare with enough possible scenarios to keep Lyria a bit longer, but she’s too annoying lmao

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#rowaelin #throne of glass fanfic #aelin galathynius x rowan whitethorn #rowan whitethorn #aelin galathynius #tog au #fake dating #faking yulemas

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leahseclipse · 2 years

Text

If I only could I'd make a deal with God, and I'd get him to swap our places | E.M

Pairing : Eddie Munson x gen ! reader

Warning : ST4 VOL2 SPOILERS, possible mentions of graphic details, coma, BUT it ends well, it's a fix-it fic !!

Summary : After the recent traumatic events, Eddie has ended up in the hospital and fell into a come. Reader visits everyday, in hopes he'll wake up.

A/N : yes I needed to do that after what happened 🥲 this is my apology for the other fic LMAO @smalluniversecollector

W/C: 1.3k

It marks one month since Eddie hasn't opened his eyes, today. One whole month without him.

Without the sound of his voice.

Without moving his arms in all directions like a sugar - high toddler.

Without the sound of his guitar playing.

He's just been there, laying in this bed, doing nothing else. I just wish he was awake.

Without the smell of whatever thing he'd smoke.

A month without all of those things. I have to admit, it feels empty, not having those in my life. It's like the world doesn't make sense now that it doesn't have him to fill it.

He's just been there, laying still, doing nothing. We probably couldn't have gone out of the upside down without injuries, so I just wished he had something that wouldn't keep him so long at the hospital at least.

I wish Eddie wouldn't be the one going through this. I've been feeling so guilty with my sprained wrist, it's nothing compared to what he has, and I wish we could've swapped places. I love him so much that I would do that for him.

But again , he'd be the one worried to death , just like I am right now. The one that wouldn't be in a coma would still suffer in some way.

I just wish we would just have something that wasn't bad at least. I wish he'd be there with me, and that we'd just have to laugh about a stupid sprained wrist and something else kind of broken, but not fatal for him. He'd play non-stop with his crutches if he had to have those.

We'd switch between his house, my house, Dustin's, we wouldn't stop moving around.

If only that was the only thing that happened. I wouldn't be here, sitting all day, hoping he wakes up.

"You know, I actually knew you before." Eddie said.

"You did?" I asked, surprised.

"In elementary school. You probably don't remember, because we weren't even in the same class. We never talked. I was... Much quieter before, the quiet type that wouldn't have the courage to tell he liked someone. I always watched you, from time to time. I still liked you, even with your bad haircut."

"That one was horrendous! How did you still like me?"

"I guess I just really loved you. And I will always love you, even if you get a messed up haircut."

If only Eddie saw what I did to my hair. I couldn't stay with this upside-down-monster-blood on my hair, even if I'd wash it, and it reminded me too much of what happened— so I just cut it off myself.

It's grown a bit since, but everyone can still see how badly cut it is.

But he won't care, probably. He'll still somehow find me pretty, in some way, even if I have no idea how. I'll probably mess with him a bit, it's funny when he goes into attorney mode to defend his case.

I hope he has nice dreams, at least. I don't want him to be trapped constantly in a nightmare. It's best if he dreams of hellfire, moments we had in the cafeteria, when we smoked under the bleachers, or when we skipped school because we didn't want to go to science.

That's what I want him to dream about.

As I got up from the chair, taking my stuff, I approached his bed and took his hand in mine. He still felt warm, he wasn't gone.

"I have to go back home, I'll see you again tomorrow though. I promise I'll be back. Sleep well." I said, kissing his forehead. I let go of his hand slowly, looking back at him when I stopped in front of the door, before leaving.

Eddie will wake up soon, he has to.

Crossing the doors of the same hospital I've been going to for more than a month, whose every corner is no longer unknown to me; I went up to the staircase, walking up to the 2nd floor to the room that's almost at the end of the corridor..

Before entering, I took a large inspiration like I do each morning in front of that pale blue door. Maybe I'm just preventing a possible heart attack in case I open that door and find Eddie wide awake.

Unfortunately, that didn't seem to be for today.

I expected this. I'm no less deceived than yesterday.

I set my bag on the empty chair, taking out my radio and turning it on to stay in touch with the others in case we need to talk. Dustin's intermissions are the one I hear the most throughout the day, he's a good kid, always tuning in to talk to Eddie, in case he might hear.

I've heard Dustin took over for Eddie as the Dungeon Master for now, they're doing a special campaign Eddie had stored out for them, so every Friday, I keep the radio at a low volume by the bedside table. It kind of acts as a lullaby for him.

Discarding of my jacket, I walked to the window and opened it, letting out fresh air inside. Everything was fine, again. The world was back to normal, almost. No one can ever forget the students who died at the start of the year, so we're just doing our best to heal for now.

Being the paranoid I am, I rushed to wash my hand in the bathroom by fear of giving him some microbe that might ruin his recovery. I just have to do it, even if I cleaned them at the entry.

That damn mirror is still there for me to see my completely tired face that clearly didn't sleep for a full night. It's just been hard to sleep on my own, it's like I don't even know how to do it anymore. Not feeling his weight on the bed as I'm laying by his side feels strange, the bed seems too big for just myself.

I just have to be patient, again. There's nothing more I can do, I'm not a Cleric or whatever. I can't pull off miracles.

As I turned off the water and dried my hands with the towel by the shower, I walked in the direction of the door and I stopped.

Eddie goddamn Munson was staring right. at. me.

His eyes were clearly opened, it wasn't a hallucination from sleep deprivation, right?

Right?

For a minute, my mouth just hung open. I couldn't seem to let out a word.

"Am I dead or what? You seem like you saw a ghost." Eddie said, looking around at the monitors.

"I'm in a dream, right?" I asked.

"I don't even know if I'm real." He replied.

"Oh god." I started to cry, rushing to his side. "You're back."

"I am?"

"You made it out, you're not dead." I informed. "It's not a dream, Eddie."

"Come here." He said, opening his arms to me. I fell onto his chest, still crying a bit. "I'm here now."

"I thought you'd never wake up."

"Neither did I." Eddie said, brushing my hair with his left hand. "Did you cut it?"

Still laying against his chest, I nodded. "I did. It didn't grow a lot since."

"It's okay, it looks good, even if it's not cut right." He reassured me.

"I know. It's horrendous, but in a good way." I said.

"In a good way, yeah." He answered as I pulled away from his chest to look at him.

"I missed you a lot, it's good to talk to you again." I smiled.

"I missed talking to you in real life. I'm glad." He smiled back, reaching for my right hand.

I took his hand in mine, rubbing his knuckles softly, "There's also other people who missed you, you know."

"I know, I'm too popular." He joked. "Can we wait a bit though, I just want a minute... or forty with you."

I laughed, "Forty sounds good."

"You know I really love you?" Eddie asked out of the blue.

"I do, because... I happen to love you too."

"Oh, you do? That's a surprise." He joked.

"Forever and always, Munson."

I hope you liked this fic :) if you did, don't hesitate to send me an ask! Requests are also appreciated, I write for other characters as well!

#Spotify #stranger things vol 2 #stranger things spoilers #stranger things fic #stranger things #strangers things 4 #eddie munson #eddie munson fix it fic #eddie munson x reader

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basslinegrave · 3 months

Text

a small compilation of my Lineplay avatar. i went through many looks, especially over the last few years, but this was the original one (best seen in the 9th anniv pic, the left was my go-to styling when i started back in 2014) i decided that i will send him off with the items he wore the most.

(i decided on the look in the first picture, might change it a little bit tomorrow but i think its good like this.) images feature a screenshot from today, an edit from the games 9th anniv in 2021 i believe, a drawing from when i received 10k hearts and one i made in class in hs, showing off that flowery umbrella that was one of my most fav items (alongside the fox mask) oddly enough his hair is black and white like mine (even the haircut is similar if you squint) it makes sense i was drawn to it

yes, its just a silly game but i played this for almost 10 years! so it closing does make me sad. i havent been truly socializing there and such lately, but i still liked to pop in almost daily, so the ending feels quite abrupt and strong. i had this game on several phones over time, feels so weird remembering how it looked all those years ago... i dont care about the money i spent on it anymore, i actually stopped using the in game currency too so i guess he can spend it in the digital afterlife lol. thought about going for one more gacha where i wanted one pair of eyes but never got them, but i think its nicer if he has the cash you know? and 96k gems lmao thats nothing in LP economy now

the way theyre still going on strong is so odd to me, all those BUY ME popups even though its closing... im used to games getting dead first (except that one sega heroes game that ended rather abruptly and early too)

might edit this post tomorrow because i remembered i actually also made an art doll based on my avi. its very crude and probably already fallen apart but i know its on my shelf i just need to get it and snap a pic and hope it hasnt turned to dust or smth

#im imagining the world stays and its huge filled with everyones houses and gardens #and the avatars will still be able to visit each other and stuff and live in this afterlife #lol coping #im okay with this now im not feeling sad anymore but yeah i will miss this #line play #lineplay

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goosewriting · 11 months

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📮 You got mail!

OKAY OKAY WAIT I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'RE FINISHED WITH THE MIKEY BABY FIC-Y BUT I just had a random idea pop out of nowhere where Mikey gives the reader, or vice versa, a coupon for having a baby! That may sound ridiculous but I took inspiration from your idea in Mikey's section of "Taking the lead". This is just a random funny thought, you don't have to acknowledge it in anyway LMAO.

I've read and seen some of your other things that aren't turtles related and they're honestly pretty good! I don't know anything about Star Wars but the lazy morning with Fives feels almost bittersweet, mainly sweet though, bitter cause I think you mentioned one time that Fives had been ohno'd, I send my condolences o7

Also gonna get the Cassandra Cut (Bald™) tomorrow my time, hope they accept cartoon references! 👍😃👌 And I hope you're doing well and taking breaks and such! 🦆🤗🦢

Best wishes!

💌 -BVA🐰🎟️

your suggestion actually made me go :0c i was like "wow BV anon here having a Big Brain Moment",, genius! i have written a little draft to more or less know where i want to go with the fic but i'll definitely be using this, thank you so much!♥

"cause I think you mentioned one time that Fives had been ohno'd" made me laugh so hard for some reason xD but seriously thank you sm for checking out my other writings even if you're not in the sw fandom?? 🥺🥺💓

and yay for the cassandra cut™! i'm currently in deseprate need of a haircut and i'm seriously considering just shaving it all off too lmao it's too hot and i'm lazy, but i'm also broke and hair salon prices are bonkers ;;_;; but hey let me know how it goes and if they did take the cartoon refs heh

other than the heat (my room is a little oven and i hate it) i'm doing good, thank you!

i wish you all a fabulous weekend full of good vibes and excellent food<3

#fives was ohno'd indeed and i'm still crying about it every day #but he lives on in my heart and my AUs #btw if you wanna get into sw hmu 👀#🐰🎟 anon #goose mail #goose honks

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nicejewishgirl · 7 months

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ok this old lady can’t stop calling my dog fat on the daily. lmao my dog needs a haircut + carding (she has a very thick under coat) but my neighbor keeps calling her fat all the time and she did it 3x today and I’m like… even with all that fur… I don’t she she looks like a “chunkette”. 💀

I think the only reason why I think people (aka this lady) do that is because we legit have trouble keeping weight on my 7-8lb dog but newsflash! they are different heights, widths..different fucking everything (including the fact that my other dog gets to be like a wooly mammoth due to her fur)! Below is Emmie next to tiny little Olivia!

I give this lady a pass because she’s old but the next time she says something (aka tomorrow lol) I’m going to tell her to stop projecting. seriously. taking about my dogs pseudo obesity is like every fucking day lmao and I feel like it’s driving me crazy!

This woman talks about her weight and weight constantly and it’s not something I feel comfortable with anyway but now she’s using my dog to talk shit. lol but yA know… talk shit… get hit!I’m kidding but seriously, she needs to stop. I mean a chunkette?!?!?! lololol

#the fatshaming of my dog!!!! 🥲💀🤡#tw body image #tw body insecurity #tw fatphobia #tw fat shaming #tagging this more bc this lady has these problems not my dog 💀

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thegraveyardjohnsongrey · 1 year

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May 2021

May: Convos of the Day

“You gotta be your own Scooter Braun”

This month I learned that I need to be my own manager. Not only do I need to be the dreamer and the planner, but I also have to be the person who gets things done - for me. I need to put myself into advantageous places, and sometimes that means sticking my neck out and putting myself out there.

Yea it’s awkward. Yes it’s stressful. Yes it’s annoying. And yes it’s uncomfortable.

But I need to take those chances. Because even one opportunity sown from a hundred tries- is worth those hundred tries.

To @Manager me, be kind to us. Be fair. And be accountable for us. Understand that you are the part of us that goes beyond our fear and gets it done. Have a healthy relationship with how we do things, and push us enough to challenge us, not go against us. Do everything in love and in good faith.

+ Started Mile-a-day challenge + APABA video & positive feedback

+ Started Jupiter’s Legacy

+ Caden’s 1st Haircut!!!!

+ RKT broken up :/

+ Dan Lalican x Angelica’s Wedding!

+ Saturday Hangout at AC & Q’s house!

+ Memorial Day Sunday at the Calotes’

Major Projects:

Securing LORs

LSAT practice

Early stages of Applications

New life goals:

Healthier technique & sound when I sing

Loving to sweat and to see being active as a friend and something that feeds me back

Less IG/social media to avoid triggers of comparison

Self-care Goals:

More moisturized hair?

gluing down sides?

Spray to make it black?

Songs:

My Head & My Heart

SOUR ALBUM!!!!

Good 4 U x Misery Business

Fast (Motion)

Build-A-Btch

5.1.21

+ Adding “bigger” eyebrows to my face really adds a drama to my face that helps me having more striking features. I effs with it + I’m so proud of myself.

Bc before today I had nothing, and after today I have, like — not *everything but A LOT

and definitely enough to finish by Monday if I really wanted

Wow.

I love work

LOL

Not really - but I LOVE seeing ideas working out perfectly and everything coming to life !!!! ITS EXHILARATING AND SO SATISFYING + Square Game w CAM (and readings hashtag #BlackMagic)

I feel like so many people achieved their professional goals this year. Their “happy endings” that I’m trying to find. But am I lokong for a moment? A day? Where I feel achievement? Is this me trying to show gratitude to my parents?

Carmelle, Cori, Kendall, Dana, Nina (maybe like the latter two, I’m allowed to be proud of where I am and what I’ve accomplished - even if it’s not the complete image I had in my head of where I’d be- or if it’s not to the standard of everyone else)

5.2.21

1.) How you feel matters.

I used to think that

2.) Sometimes Friends hype up plans and don’t follow through.

It’s a sucky thing but it happens. Things come up, and sometimes plans change. It’s safest to not take those excited comments to heart. Lol

Robert -

That I know what it means to help build a community and that I know what to do with the resources I have and how to use that for others.

That I know how to think under pressure and to (mediate) difficult situations

Personal Statement Questions I want to answer

Who I am

How that inspires me be a lawyer

How _____ School will help me do exactly that

Make your arguments air tight!

Convincing myself that I’m not suffering when I am.

“Where in that do you hear about you giving that to God”

+ Surge of excitement/happy-prideful ness chemicals from IG and all the likes and comments coming from it (“is this like.. what it’s like to be famous?” LMAO)

+ Reward: Enjoying my social media and my AAPI Heritage posts after FINISHING THE SLIDESHOW VIDEO FOR APABA !! WOO (praise god I met that deadline and didn’t even realize!) - pats on own back for working hard, wormy smart, and EXECUTING the damn thing. BOBA WITH THE SISTERS TOMORROW TO CELEBRATE !!

5.3.21

+ Caden’s fly swatting

Importance of

feeling a wave of positive change and uplifting ness

Knowing how to work hard and smart- KNOWING when to take a break and to back in my work In bite-size increments

Allowing myself to get lost in my passion - and allowing myself to be PROUD of my work rather than defeated by it

Having pride in what you put forth

+ Serving face in the mirror when I was lying on on my bed. I may have gained a lot of my pre-pandemic weight back, but QORL I’m STILL saving face?????? Looks like that year really helped my develop more permanent angles huh (and pride for my flat nose and almond eyes!!!!)

5.6.21

Kuddos email from Alicia about presentation

Second email while at Gym - Things are possible

Feelings of lightness, like I’m where I need to be; sitting liking outside from an empty gym (Mirror - Porter)

Loving the shape of my nose today (it’s not like huge and irritated? It’s slim? And I’m like ??... never sure how that happens? But I wanna know how I get it like that. For future reference!

Feeling the pump from weights today was nice!! LATE 2020 BODY HERE I COME

also do carrots make you more orange in tint? Idk but I like the color of my skin rn- it’s so vibrant and brown and caramel-Y. And smooth! How I do that!!! Water intake?

5.7.21 Wanting to make good on wave of positive feedback and ask for letter of recommendation **Realization: You have to be your own publicist, manager, agent, therapist, fan. LOL. You literally have to pout yourself in the most advantageous positions, and that means being your own Scooter braun sometimes.

Mornings are for LSAT, Afternoons are for Family/Errands, Evenings for ME

I am very proud of you for cleaning so much and getting everything you wanted to get done today done. You studied, cleaned hella, cooked for yourself, ate a healthy meal, scheduled a chat with Zarra, cleaned your car, purged receipts- etc. I am so so so so offing proud of you. I see you. You are doing amazing

Epiphany: It doesn’t need to workout in the way I wanted; it just needs to work out

5.10.21

AL mad pissing me off

I’m always so frustrated when it comes to her, because mom and dad never taught us to A.) be boastful nor b.) Competitive with each other. But hey, I guess that’s what happens when you’re the middle and have to find a way to “shine”. It’s comforting to know that any of what I say has weight and that I’m not the only one who sees it. Praying for her unresolved insecurities tbh

I shouldn’t need to feel like I have to prove myself to you. In any light, really. Because your thoughts are your own, and your perspective is valid. Just so as long as you are bot rude, destructive, or divisive

But maybe that’s just it: maybe not any one of us HAVE to be the perfect one. There’s three of us that each of us are too at and I think that it is our calling to recognize that, live it, and be proud of jt

5.10.21

BMI is 31% ☹️☹️☹️ (I gained 16 pounds since December!!!!!!! I cry)

5.11.21 - felt overwhelmed by everything LSAT is in a month again, APABA social opportunities — WHATEVER. We can entertain networking and social opportunities AFTER June LSAT and the WHOLE year after we have finished submitting applications Focus on the projects you have already been assigned to and focus on mentorship with Zarra.

I can not be waiting on things and people that might not happen

5.11.21

“Kamille we’re at Armature”

Iconic pics, Kyle, and my booty !!!!!! #MangoSangria #MonicaMakesMeLaugh

It was so nice to be surrounded in laughter and good spirits again. To have like a “mini” night out. Granted, it was a little weird, since this wasn’t my crowd of close friends. But. Still nice!

It also freaks me out that all the “babies” from 2018 are al grown up and graduated - Raul, Jacob, Nica, etc. like girl..... HUH?????? (I am shook)

Monica is so effing funny. I forgot

5.12.21

These days, I’ve been wondering if/when I’ll ever get into law school. A part of me wonders if the past 3 years was just another script to go by - to prove and show to others that I was “working on something”. And when I look back on my progress, idk why I feel ashamed and aspiration-less and then other times I swallow up with pride.

Half of me wants to give myself unconditional love and support - and to endlessly believe that I’m- actually good (and destined) for law school.

Then the other half of me wants to stop pretending. It wonders why - if it was meant for me and part of my calling - why does it feel so impossible all the time? Am I fighting for a dream or am I bullying myself into an image of myself that I insist on having.

I’ve always enjoyed who I am around people and how they view me.

Been wondering if I’m bipolar. I’ve always felt everything so intensely - and I feel like I’ve always been prone to leaning into the positive more so than the negative.

Culture: It is a commitment to sharing traditions, remembering history, and embodying resilience.

5.13.21

Appreciating my face and my bod for what it is and re-learning to be body positive. Aka loving when I swear and not beating myself up for not measuring up the bar that I used to reach from before

Just like the world outside me, my body is allowed to have seasons. To change to grow to gain, to lose. I’m allowed to do it all

LMAO AT OUR RANDOM BURST OF CREYING in the car on the way to get soy sauce from the Philippine Grocery. “Hard Habit to Break” — hearing dads voice so clearly and it making me emotional that one day I’ll hear that and he won’t be there and LOL IDK WHY I RANDOMLY STARTED CRYIG LMAO IT WAS SO WEIRD

I did good today. I did a lot of things. I studied. I worked out. I grocery shopped for the house. I cleaned for the house. I prepped food. I picked up dinner for the Vus. I had quality time with them. I did good today. I deserve rest. I deserve reflection.

5.16.21

I don’t want to attach myself to those things, because if I do that, I’m afraid I’ll always be mourning myself. And I don’t want to expend that energy. Ya know, energy is not what I have all the time anymore. And that’s a part of growing up

If what I’m experiencing now is the beginning of how it’s going to be and one of many, I don’t want to always be here.

I want to welcome those parts of me that are coming in and all the good that is to come from me evolving and changing and growing.

I should be proud that I get to even have this. When many people don’t have that past/foundation to begin with, But that I get to do it again

Question for you right now

What can I do now to minimize those feelings of anxiety and shame?

Question for the future:

Do I ever get over these feelings of growing pain?

Is the life I’m building and in 5 years from now something I’m proud of adding to my existing catalogue of passionate and exciting work?

Something tells me to watch out for 2038

“To choose something opposite of what nature tells you is the being of love”

5.17.21 “No one thinks that of you. No one is attacking you no one is giving you bad energy. Stop feeding those illusions in your head, come outside of them and work and live and be alive.”

+ It’s so funny how I’m already daydreaming about what October///Fall 2021 is going to look like. Specifically after September when all the hell of these next few months are going to be over.

Sometimes I get scared thinking about what my application will look like. How defeated and hopeless I may feel. I’m scared it’s going to be like Sept 2020 all over again. And it’s in my head that Sept/October is just a cursed time for me all around (ever since 2019. Haha)

But at the same time, I can’t help but feel a small gust of optimism thinking about then. Knowing that Ill be done and knowing that I will have given it my all- even if it isn’t 100% of the image I had in mind for my first round of law school applications.

A small part of me hopes that I’ll be proud of myself for coming that far, and that whether I’ll be able to see it or not- that good things are inevitably coming my way.

I can’t wait to go to Khoimanda’s wedding and turn tf up!!!, I can’t wait for our potential family trip to Seattle, and for Fall/Halloween festivities to return. I can’t wait to hopefully see my lineage out and/or at a rave (ok, maybe not EDC? But def spring 2022! Lmao), I can’t wait to work on my body again, I can’t wait have more CAM hangouts and Quality FTs with friends I love by then, and overall I can’t wait feel as free as I did in between Feb LSAT and April NALA.

I think it’s so weird that I’m looking forward to Fall when summer has barely begun. But it’s all good. Summer 2021 is when ow tap thisbmuthafuqqa of an application UP. And submit that sht.

2022 we comin for you baybee

sometimes I feel bummed that no one (besides my family) got to see my “quarantine” bod/weight loss. But .. I guess the more I think about it, the more I realize that maybe that was something for me to enjoy.

+ “If I crave only the sensation of being in a relationship without having someone to fit the bill. Well then….. I want joy and excitement. I want the sensation of happiness more than I want a person. And I guess thats where the wrong foot was placed. “I bore my soul to you and you wanted no part of it. Thats enough to convince me.” —— a delightful thought I had while listening to jazz coffee shop music on YouTube. A reminder to myself to stay creative, stay hopeful, and to stick to what gives back to me.

5.18.21

"It's okay if it's only for a short time."

+ Feeding Ducks with Josh & Denni. I’m so happy that we’re all in each other’s lives again and that ... there’s a sense of bonding and connection again. Feels like a girl group that has since reconciled LOL #EthnicCleansingDucks #BananaAtDuck #YayForThemReteachingMeHowToRideABike #MealOnWheel #OliviaRodrigoWhatALegend

“I just felt so disconnected from myself and what I knew myself to be. And in turn that made me feel disconnected from those around me. Like... how could I relate and catchup and support my friend if I couldn’t even do that for myself. I didn’t feel like having that conversation of “ya know I’m not ok. I’m not the happiest, I do feel displaced. I wasn’t ready to share and fig into those feelings with someone else, largely bc I hadn’t even fully unpacked it myself”

+ If you ever want to feel better, put on some eyebrows and some chapstick. And drink your water. It’ll make you feel like a functional and presentable person again”

“I just feel like my life is changing as I know it.”

Things are always changing and time is always passing. The more you mimize your focus into that the more you’ll go mad. Stop fighting it - and dance along with it.

5.21.21

“God meets you where you meet yourself”

“Is that what you think that’s all i want you to be? Not g?”

“I will always be g. Unless you look like I ain’t looking at you”

5.22.21

+ Caden’s 1st Haircut he’s so cute and so smart and so kind and so cuddly! UGH

+ Laughs with Ate Lee in the car (Idk how to make a fire)

+ Invited to Dan Lalican’s wedding (I know, random right? Lmao)

+ It’s so weird to think that one day I will look back on this time - law school application stress, LSAT, taking care of Caden, being jobless —- as something of the past. That instead of being the “now” and the present moment, it will one day be another “past era” in my life that I’ll be able to look back on. I realize that so much more these days. Like whenever I hear “Rain on Me” or the “positions album”. the more I hear music from Summer or Fall 2020. That. Despite all the hardships and sadness and feelings of loss I felt from so many things in that time- there was still a life I lived and still so much good I had.

It’s always so weird to me how you can’t fully reflect on a time period until it’s passed. Until it’s gone. And so idk why that always makes me feel bittersweet. It freaks me out and makes me sentimental all at the same time and often I never really know how to process it. Lol

I wonder if there will ever be a time when I’m better at processing how fast time changes and how flexible life can be.

But I guess maybe that should make me feel excited? That the more things change, the more things will remain fresh and exciting.

Idk.

I just hope that in 5 years I’ll be able to look back on this time with a big swollen heart; filled with gratitude and excitement.

We hope LOL

5.23.21

People make decisions based on their experiences of you. And if their experience of you is that you’re late and you make last minute decisions, then you shouldn’t be mad at that.

“I’ve always been my most confident self when I talk about the Lord

the power of speaking to someone so rooted in the Lord

Snapped me out of my funk. The realization that: in it praying

I’m where I’m meant to be - and that as long as I’m doing it with the Lord it’s good

“You sound like you’ve really grown and are at peace with that. That’s beautiful.”

5.24.21

+ My dump truck fattie booty while sitting on the bench at the gym #BlueNikeShorts #WhiteWoodlandsBoxers

+ My sexy as progress and how toned and tan and good my body looks; we making it baybeee!

+ Felt incredibly confident 10/10 physical appearance wise (clear smooth skin, no terrible flare ups and looked so effing toned today)

+ Feel antsy about LSAT and future

+ Looking forward to wedding fun this Friday but also getting nervous at how Much I have to make room for it and prep during this week - WHICH takes away study time 😭

5.25.21

Time passes. And you’ll have lots to reminisce on (luckily). But it doesn’t mean you have to be sad. SMF throwbacks and talking w Reena. — You’re allowed to be as joyful and excited and full of humor and light, no matter how slow things are going on. You don’t have to guilt yourself into feeling a certain way. Time passes. And you are allowed to dance and to Move freely along with it.

What a gift it is to see things progress as they are meant to. What a gift it is to remember unique seasons and to embrace every fruit that those times gave us. What a gift it is to experience change.

Sometimes these days I have a hard time embracing what’s supposed to be “permanent”. And I guess... it’s weird. It feels like time passes so slowly and so fast at the same time. And I feel like hitting everything down because I always want to be able to remember every moment, ever sensation, and every feeling. Even if it’ll pass. And these days i I guess I just didn’t expect things would change so drastically.. but I guess that gives me hope. I guess if I take a quick glimpse at all of my favorite things - if I look at X-Men comics, Britney Spears albums, I guess things have to change. And the beauty of every single change came with the fact that every change made way forward something new. Something fresh, unfamiliar, and exciting, Not change, but progress. And I want to remember that progress is where new treasures are found. Progress brings valleys, it brings highs and lows, and it brings the unforeseeable. But I guess that’s what makes an interesting Song. And I guess - if you compare the open dessert with the Gand Canyon, you’d be far more amazed and enchanted by the Canyon. In all its varying heights and inconsistencies and unique/fine details. From a grander point of view , I guess that’s what makes something beautiful. Not necessity details of repetition and predictability. But in the larger picture of a grand image.

You are allowed to feel old anxieties and old pain. Don’t let your pride be the one to repress your feelings and make you feel small and go unheard. Sit with your insecurities. Allow them to tell you your fears. Finally, learn to walk with them, allowing them to leave as they please.

Inspired by my feelings of not wanting to force myself to go along with a certain feeling I’ve had from before, I removed Kyle, Tammi, and Randy from my IG close friends. I don’t know why it feels like such a big deal (when these friends don’t hold a necessarily CLOSE CLOSEE place. Idk. I guess I just want to stop justifying certain things that I do when I feel that it doesn’t give back to me).

5.26.21

My face looks so much better with facial hair. Like my features really POP and look symmetrical when my hair is grown out

+ Talking to loads of friends today on FT - Josh, Reena, Calvin, etc

Made the realization that ... I’ve had the tendency of withdrawing from friends and catching up with them in this pandemic era. Not only bc I don’t have money LOL, but bc Im never excited to talk about myself when we inevitably catch up. I hate telling the same story I’ve been telling since 2018, and I especially don’t want to confront the issue that .. I’ve been happier. That I’m not my best, and that I’m not the most hopeful rn. And that the place that I’m in is one of being tired all the time, being afraid all the time, feeling like I’m not measuring up or doing anything right. And feeling left to wonder if all my most memorable moments are behind me.

And so whenever Im going through periods like that I tend to withdraw bc I don’t want to lie and pretend that everything is good. I guess that so much of my identity is being a happy and energetic version of me, so much of what I’m known for (and feel valued for) is being that. And so when it comes to being anything BUT that, it makes me take a step back. And..... I don’t want to be sad Judsy, I don’t want to be helpless, hopeless, and God-less Judsy. I don’t know how to be that person with my friends. I don’t know that person.

And... I mean I guess technically I know that person. I know that person very well, in the comfort of my own journals and in my own secure thoughts of reflection. but I don’t know how to be that person in the presence of others. And so I guess that’s something I’m working on and building off of. Recognizing that it’s ok not to be this bright & bubbly caricature all the time. And that my real friends value who I am when I’m not funny.

Appreciate Josh, Calvin, Reena, and all my friends who remind me what it feels like to feel seen and to be wanted. and that it’s ok to laugh Life off and keep going..

5.31.21

could care less about katey and kyles engagement (lol oops)

Caden’s sweet demeanor and how he looks concerned and presses his tiny face against ours whenever we pretend to faint :’) LOL

Seeing Devera again and remembering how genuinely funny and a joy it is to laugh with him

Raffy and PDP

Seeing Caden w Liana

Kinda bummed that G didn’t text us when rolling :’/ LMFAOO oh wellz. Humble reality checks I suppose. (Maybe we really not should be relying on certain people or circumstances to fulfill us. Rather, to allow life to change and bend and to allow whatever THAT looks like to fulfill you? And to trust in that.

Siana’s Legacy:

Artists using the “90s Dance” trend after acclaimed 2019 album “Uncharted”

“Honeymoon Fades” Era Singles

“Honeymoon Fades” (released November 6, 2020)

“Baby” (video December 11, 2020)

My Head & My Heart (released February 20, 2021)

“Not Siana giving us 2018 and 2019 vibes from all these haircuts”

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interlagosed · 1 year

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Happy vacations for tomorrow Hibi!!! Do you already have plans?🥰

i plan on floating in the void for several hours

ok but seriously kljfkl i'll be flying across the world to visit my family after two years of not seeing them. i'm excited and nervous. excited of course because i love my family, nervous of course because they're a mess right now and i've genuinely been at my wit's end with everything going on at home. so i don't know that i'll be going home to a particularly fun environment. thank god for my husband being there too. i couldn't handle it without him. honestly.

tomorrow i'm hoping to go get my eyebrows done lmao maybe book a facial because girl my skin is a fucking MESS from stress. on tuesday i'm getting a haircut (i think i'm going to go pretty short, i just feel like i need that). in between, i'm planning on packing, playing video games, reading a lot, doing some art, and hopefully writing a ton. when i'm back home - i'm going to fucking shop. it's the one thing dubai is good for lmao.

#hibi answers

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someone1348 · 3 years

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This is for my lovely best friend who was kind enough to write me a fic! Here's yours! @sleepy--anon i hope you enjoy!

People in this: Ler!Sapnap, Lee!Quackity

(Karlnapity romance so if you dont like that dont read it!)

Tw: like the smallest bit of angst (jealousy) pretty much! Thats it though it's soft! For the most part! And mild cursing!

Plot: While Karl is out on a "business trip" (time travel stuff) he leaves his other two husband's alone and well lets just say it was an eventful evening to say the least

With all that being said enjoyyyy :]

___________~☆°♡°☆°♡°☆~______________

Jealousy

Tickle fights and Tickling in general was almost an everyday occurrence in the Karlnapity household. It pretty much was second nature to the three.

With that comes ler moods and lee moods poping up left and right. Typically between the three Sapnap was ler the most, followed by Quackity with Karl most of the time being lee, nothing bad of course, they loved the dynamic of everything from this specific thing to how their relationship worked. They were happy and that's all that mattered.

The days went on as they normally do.

"EE! SAHahap! StahAhap!" Karl would twist around from Sap's evil fingers pushing at the boy's hands, giggling freely as quackity watched smiling a bit as his two husband's went on to do what they do.

It was always like this for the most part. While he was getting a snack,

"No pLEase!! Hehe" Karl's beautiful laugh could be heard from the other room.

While cuddling, sap would run his fingers over the time traveler's stomach sending sweet giggles to flow out of their husband's mouth.

Even in the store one time Sapnap poked at Karl's sides. Of course Quackity would join in sometimes to tickle his favorite lee (leaning) fiancé, but he was jealous, beyond jealous.

Seeing this everyday not only built up on his lee moods but he just wanted to be involved, not just in tickles but in the relationship. He wants cuddles and attention and affection from the two people he loves most.

And yeah with the lee moods he has bad but it's not the same. He wants his husband's and so help me thats what he was gonna get. He was a man on a mission.

'Let's goooo!!' He thought in his head as he started the day.

Karl had left last night, the bed was alot colder now. He turned to see Sap curled up onto his side his mouth slightly a-jar with his hair flowing perfectly on top of his face.

He sighed happily lightly pushing some of the hair out of his face. He couldn't remember the last time he felt this happy and in love.

'I'm gonna make him breakfast' He thought getting up carefully as to not wake him and got started on cooking up his favorites.

Not even 20 minutes later the firey boy poked his head into the kitchen

"Waffles?"

"Mhm"

"Mmmm yay! Thank you babe!"

Quackity smiled "Anytime"

After the two finished the scilence became loud.

"What do you wanna do?" Quackity asked rocking a bit back and fouth on his heels trying not to make the scilence anymore awkward.

"I got work to do so you entertain yourself, I'll be quick"

Quackity nodded "okay! Good luck!"

"Thanks" Sap said shooting him a smile leaving back to their shared room to do the said work.

The beanie boy sighed flopping down onto the couch. He flipped on a random channel and texted Karl.

'Hey Baby!! I hope your trip is going good,we miss you and can't wait to see you tomorrow!<3'

(10:35)

He held the phone close to his chest letting out another sigh. He knew in his heart that Sapnap was gonna be busy all day so instead of sulking he told him he was going for a walk.

He went walking around, coming back, making more food, playing video games. All while sap typed away at the keyboard.

It wasn't helping at all it only increased the feeling of wanting to be with his Sapnap, his fiancé, he wanted attention and love dammit!

The smaller boy marched up to their room.

"SAPNAP!!!"

the bandana wearing man shook and snaped up to look at his clearly ticked off tiny lover.

"WOAH! what!?! Yes?!" He said furrowing his eyebrows.

"Are you done yet?"

The other slowly blinked "uhhhh,," he looked back at his work "nope not yet"

"Too bad! You are now finished because i say so!" He crossed his arm's

"Ha! Yeah thats cute hun but im busy, i gotta get this done, im sorry, I'll be there soon"

Quackity scoffed "whatever" he left as sapnap sighed

'He's never like this, maybe i should stop and check on him' Sapnap thought closing his laptop quietly sneaking up on his amazing fiancé on the couch.

"HIYA!" he tackled him to the couch holding him close.

"WA!- SHIT!" he fell over with him now in a cuddly trap, smiling widely giggling a bit.

"What's wrong Quacky babe" Sap said concerningly putting his head to his adorable smol husband's shoulder.

"I wanted to hang out together,,, i want to be involved, i want attention and affection and love sapnap and i haven't gotten anyyy in a long time" Quackity spilled out as sap processed everything.

'Looking back i see where he's coming from, it's been alot of Karl-'

"Don't get me wrong i love karl and i love giving him attention and affection and everything and i love watching you two be that way with each other i just i guess i felt a bit left out"

Sapnap nodded,

"Im Sorwy baps, forgive me?" He used his small voice making quackity cringe a bit jokingly.

"Give me attention and we will see what happens" He smirked

"Hmmmm" He anticipated his moves and ideas watching quackity's eyes that were pointed right to his hands

'So that's what he wants' he smirked wider lightly running his fingers slowly up and down his sides.

The other on top of him tensed "s-sap"

"Yea babe?" He said as if he wasn't tracing the man's sides with tickly anticipation.

"W-what are you doing?"

"Giving you attention, isn't that what you wanted?" He smiled at him as Quackity sank into Sapnap's embrace leaning his head on the pillow behind them, Sapnap's head still on his shoulder.

Sap lowly giggled quickly stittering his hands his stomach then back to his sides watching him lift up and squeak.

"You're such a dick" Qauckalee said in a joking matter making Sapnap's smirk deepen.

"Oh im a dick?!" He digged into his stomach watching as quackity squealed digged his heels to the end of the couch.

"NAHAHAHAHA! SAHAHAPNAHAP!"

"Thats my name love~" sap moved closer towards his bellybutton.

"AYEHE NOT THERE!"

"Yes there! The giggle button has been unpressed for wayy to long, i need it to make up for the lost times Quackity"

"NOOHONONONO- AH! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GEHHEHEHE! GOHOHO-EEP!"

Sapnap giggled with him taking in every werid noise and laugh that the touch starved lee had made.

Seeing it was clear he wasn't used to it he slowed down moving back to his sides lightly to get his breathing steady again.

"Easy tiger, i got you" he reassured him getting his breathing together

"Im gonna getcha'!" Sapnap said moving up towards his ribs scribbling along up and down and In-between.

The smaller's back arched as his giggles mixed into light laughter.

"AyEehehe naha-Ha! Tickles!! It tickles!!" The man rang out trying to squirm out of his fiancé's tickle trap.

"Thats the point Quacker's im hungryyyy i need your giggles to surviveee" he lightly blew a raspberry onto his neck, the other scrunching up

"Nomnomnom" he made fake eating sounds, playing pretend before blowing another raspberry into his neck.

Sapnap giggled and stopped holding him close rubbing circles into the top of his hand

"Come here bubba" He lifted Quackity up letting him wrap around him while he got a blanket.

Sitting back down he put the blanket overtop of them throwing on the Disney movie Coco for some well deserved aftercare and fiancé time, Playing with his hair Sapnap smiled down at his man kissing the top of his head.

"We gotta get you a haircut buddy its so long" he teased as quackity laughed

"I'll get a haircut the day you shave" the tired one teased back both laughing together enjoying the moment, the beanie boy slowly falling asleep on his chest.

"Goodnight handsome" he placed another kiss to the top of his head.

*Ding!*

Quackity's phone went off, Sapnap looked, it was Karl.

'Hi bubby!! It's going lmao, i miss you both so much too! I'll be home soon i promise! And when i do get home It's cuddle time! Hehe I'll talk to you soon quack baby! Tell sap i said hi and that i love him too! *mwah!*'

(8:17)

Sapnap smiled and put the phone back down to the side of him, smiling at the boy in his arms.

'Homework can wait'

_________________________________________

I absolutely LOVED writing this! I love Karlnapity! I hope you all enjoyedd! :]

#ler!sapnap #lee!quackity #k writes tk things #dream smp tickle #dreamsmp tickle fic #mcyt tickle #mcyt tickle fic #karlnapity tickle fic #karlnapity

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