#i really am not normal about these two tbh

[fizzyorange-v2]

wouldn’t it be sooooo funny and narratively cathartic for both their characters if at some point william is once again falling. whether that be physically off another fucking cliff, or into some kind of hell portal, or anything that would actually pose deadly threat to the ghost boy that can technically float and fly. or shit, now it seems worryingly possible it could be william falling more morally/metaphorically from heroism itself into some kind of villainy.

either way though, william is again falling to his doom. but this time dakota is there, and he catches him.

whether that’s by physically grabbing on to his hand or symbolically offering it out for him to take to once again join them or fucking both at once.

and he stops william from falling.

and this time, dakota has the strength to pull his friend back up. this time, dakota gets to save them both.

so this time, william doesn’t fall. because this time? william isn’t alone. isn’t lost in the woods without any guidance but a strange blue flicker.

because this time william has his friends to catch him.

and so, this time… william doesn’t die.

i feel like this fundamentally would heal an open wound both dakota and william have been carrying around from the very beginning; finally, dakota is strong enough to save his friend from a deadly fall. finally, someone is there to catch william before it’s too late.

dakota finally gets to save the unsaveable, and william finally gets to stop falling to the fate he’s had since the beginning.

#anyway guess who just watched the new prime defenders episode aha #the angst has been off the chart in every single goddamn jrwi episode at the moment #and i for one am Thriving (grossly sobbing into my hands). #anywaysssss. i personally support william and any plan he makes. #if he wants to rip some guy’s soul out of their body to save his good pal i say let him <3 #jrwi pd #jrwi prime defenders #pd spoilers #pd analysis #dakota cole #william wisp #ghostkicks #i really am not normal about these two tbh #fizz character thoughts

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

Also I quit my job of what would in about a month or two have been 10 years, and perhaps now I will get to actually be a human being again.

#honestly? honestly? #last week i told the two (2) godawful egomaniac lab head Man In Academia bosses i quit and that we need to formalise it asap and i just #felt like a little feather about to float away on a breeze #maybe now i can do normal people things like eat and sleep and have a routine of some sort idk #i have been slowly losing it for at least 3-4 years now #i took a screenshot and last year i had no fewer than 14 fucking travel orders fulfilled #most of which consisted of like 12+ hour days on ships and docks #i'm just so tired man #not for reblogging obviously #i don't really wanna vent anymore or ponder them and the entire godforsaken institution but like #good riddance tbh #which is really really sad when you think about it! but here we are #it was just... no trace of future anywhere to be seen! entirely a Void!! #gonna post a beefy lesbian paladin real quick to push this post down lmao #but i felt like sharing because i know there's good and concerned people who follow me here and i both appreciate and miss you all #and lord knows some of you have been listening to me vent and whine for ages #am i going to miss some great people and the research community of my field? of course but also it was all just completely unsustainable

[dafry-shenanigans]

Aight never mind u guys can have some drawings I've finished so far-

Winter king says 'Hello there!' :)

I love them so much-

#yo i can't believe i almost forgot the glasses- #because i DID IN THE LAYTON AND SIMON ONE AAAAA #anyways them💖 #i am so normal about them (lying) #y'all have no idea how many sketches I've prepared and ideas still in store #simon petrikov #winter king #fionna and cake #adventure time #the winter king #anyways wish me luck because I've been not feeling the greatest but i hope i can finish drawing it all first- #Also i like to think of em as buddies #i really wanna see more wholesome and fluff interaction of the two tbh

[elegyofthemoon]

well. i finished ch 17 of hi3. but at what cost

#avil plays hi3 #tbf majority of me playing through hi3 just looks like This. #yes the acheron trailer made me get up and finish ch 17 #i. :( #the fight between kiana and mei was so painful :( #ok also i suck ass in the combat and i was so scared of having to restart #BUT I THINK I HURT MORE THE FACT THAT KIANA JUST REFUSED TO GIVE UP ON MEI #BUT MEIS ALSO DOING THIS BECAUSE SHES TRYING TO SAVE KIANA #AND THEY WERE BOTH FIGHTING TO STOP AND TRY TO SAVE EACH OTHER #MEI YOU SAVED KIANA BUT LIKE..... DONT YOU WANT TO LIVE ALONGSIDE HER.... MEI PLEASE #tbh. the way i was going through ch 17 for hi3. #kiana and mei remind me a lot of oz and gil's relationship back in pandora hearts but #now it makes me want to hit my head on a brick wall because #'wow. i really just gravitate tO THE SAME FUCKING MEDIA EVERY DAMN TIME AVIL STOP IT FFS' #also idk i was thinking about it too #mei tried earlier to use the herrschers powers to try and protect kiana but it wasnt enough. she failed that time #and with no other option to save her she just HAD to and it makes me HURT that this was her only option #IN HER HEAD. I BELIEVE IN YOU MEI I THINK THERE COULDVE BEEN ANOTHER OPTION HERE (IDK WHAT BUT I AM SOBBING) #sprawls on the ground #at least i can have an emotional break for a little bit.... hsr update so i can chill w that #and then when i finish catching up w that. then i go back to being hi3's punching bag #can i get off this train now? why'd i sign myself up for this (welt yang doomed me and then i got fucked over by everything else) #idk also the way that both mei AND kiana resorted to using their herrscher powers to stop the other. two stubborn people.... #but its done because they just... they just care so much and want to save the other #okay yeah we did beat each other up about it bUT STILL #MEI I BELIEVE IN YOU YOU CAN TURN THIS AROUND 😭😭😭😭😭 #anyways. glad i did. i have the worst stomach ache rn so i was Going through it #but my brain hit a reset so i feel normal now. save for the crying

[essektheylyss]

I want to WRITE but nothing is HAPPENING I am frothing at the fucking MOUTH

#I'm fine and normal this is fine!!! #it really is fine (not rn but in the long run) so i am not seeking advice just venting #i do really start to go feral when i dont write for a bit but I will get over it (by writing) #tbh i am actually reaching critical mass of feral vibes plus building up Stuff To Write again which is really just like what has to happen #it's about how it went for two months after i finished luminous worlds #and i am not really surprised it's been like four months of this given i finished both tiefling fic and also semi-finished a book draft #so it'll be fine soon and then i will be chilling 😎

[monstriiss]

.

#gonna get kinda heavy in the tags since im stuck on mobile and cant drop a read more but i need to vent fam squad #god I want to come back but i just don't know how to talk #like i feel like i cant just spring back into conversation like everything is okay and fine #because its not and i dont know how to get over the mental barrier of talking about normal things #it's a really weird feeling and i know im isolating myself but i just dont know what else to do #like i can talk to my family that were there for it. i can talk to people that have been through it #idk i just feel really disconnected #my friends try to talk to me about things and i just cant relate anymore #and they dont get it either. none of my friends have lost their parents and especially havent seen someone die #and they dont know how to talk about it so now its like none of us bother #theres things that happened that i cant say and tbh im pretty haunted #to them its been ages since mum died but to me its only two weeks and still feels like yesterday #i think im pulling away just so i dont have to deal with the hurt of being dropped first #im glad that i have some good close friends that i CAN talk to about things and im so grateful for them #but hoooo boy everything hits different now #tiejfkeie boy am i glad i get to see my therapist tomorrow dkfjskfndk #;; ooc. #death tw #parent death tw #negative tw #;; tbd.

[ruffgem]

one of my roommates just told me they read my comic… holy shit good thing I didn’t make it a thinly veiled story about how much I hate my roommates like I almost did

#I really did not think either of them would ever read it that’s crazy #ok but tbh #Nelly living in the garage while Brutalia lives in a whole ass house is actually lowkey an exaggeration of my life LOL #I literally live in my room because my roommate moved her BF in and they take over the entire apartment while I am sequestered in my room #LOL #i would never do this because it’s simply not like me but sometimes I think about how I could write like the most scathing letter about how #they were the shittiest roommates ever and leave it for them when I go home… #but I won’t because that’s petty #but I could. it would be so beautiful #I won’t though… it will be satisfying enough to delete their numbers when I’m out of this city for good #I JUST HAVE TO SURVIVE UNTIL MAY (graduation) #if anyone’s ever wondering why I’m so annoying all of the time but ESPECIALLY when I go back to college this is why ok it’s because I live #in One Room #I’ve sat on my couch 4 times in the three years I’ve lived here #I become 800 times more normal every time I go home because I’m able to exist in multiple rooms without third-wheeling two fuckheads #GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! no it’s okay.

[wachi-delectrico]

Gonna get spicy for a second and say that everyone loves spewing hate about narcissistic (NPD) parents and how awful parents with personality disorders are, but if someone were to make a post with the exact same cadence about ADHD parents they'd get shot in public at first sight

#rambling #Lemme clarify and extend my point here (cos I feel ppl could really misinterpret this one) #Am I saying people should just accept the abuse of parents if said parents have a personality disorder? No #Am I saying people with ADHD parents have it worse or that both experiences are comparable and exactly the same? No #What I'm saying is that ppl are much more eager to call out abusive or neglectful behaviour from ppl w personality disorders bc #they're seen as 'scary' or 'monstrous' and inherently evil so they have no qualms going full force at it. They think -pd ppl are the devil #But adhd in ppl's general views could never be the source of such pain from a parent to a child; ADHD ppl are seen as childish #and harmless and clueless and silly and tbh a bit stupid. Besides they could never hurt a 'monster' by jumping the gun at -pd ppl right? #'normal people don't have personality disorders so this can't affect me! But normal people can have adhd!' #That's the core of my complaint: one is dehumanised as a destructive monster; the other is as an innocent victim child #And both (parent w -pd & w adhd) can be pretty bad in their own uniqie ways! But such a thing is never considered - for the #societal construct of the child - that neurodivergencies get pushed into - is of an untainted pure inherently clueless being below human #From my exp and the exp of other friends lemme say: having an adhd parent can suck so much ass! Lol #I grew up with two opposing ideals troubling my mind: my mothers obvious overwhelming love; and the shadow her constant absence cast #She loved me so much and did as much as she could; but constantly forgot about my care and my needs and made rash choices #I think about that more and more as i age; especially as i go to doctors over and over for problems i have had since forever #It is an awful feeling to have sink in your heart: how a parent's love isn't enough; how 'maturing quick' isn't a blessing but a curse #As i grew i stopped telling my mom about my needs my school things and my life bc i got used to her forgetfulness and lack of organisation #It meant irregular eating schedules & inadequate meals. In 5th grade I'd eat table scraps at school cos my mom couldn't remember #how I'd tell her over and over that the food had to be in a specific way or it'd get burnt in the school's oven #I'd go to the 'first' dr appointment to deal w an ongoing problem & then she'd forget to schedule the following ones #You get the idea #Kind of a weird post w a strange framing device but I've been thinking about it a lot lately. Smth triggered this thought last night #I'll also never forget a few months ago when i went go a specialist for my hEDS - told her I've known all my life but never got treatment #Also just. The crushing feeling of the dr saying ''you should've gotten your own med team to work ur case since u were young!' #And just. silently nodding & wanting to cry feeling validated but also so hurt looking @ the obvious neglect #Anyways hey how did this therapy session go Doctor

[starpros-sunshine]

seb. seb hes not smiling. and has a fatui background................

I knowwwwww he's still everything to me you do not know how smitten I am with Lyney as a character

#he's soooo #i love it when the silly magicuan has a mysterious past and isn't actually allll that silly #I'm a little angry at the traveler for reacting the way they did at the end if the archon quest ngl #how is Lyney so different from Ajax please explain to me why you think him beingba fatuus is unacceptable but Ajax can get away with almost #commiting genocide #i mean ik it's kimd of about the withholding of information but come on. #they were nothing but nice to you the entire time cut them some slack and give them the benefit of the doubt will you #and god lyney in his voicelines is so. is flirty the right word he certainly is very very friendly good god man #Lyney and Lynette can do no wrong in my opinion I'd forgive them about anything #i don't mind the fatui that much tbh i mean yeah sure as an organisation they're. bad. to say the least #but if we look at the individual fatuus it's just kinda. okay. #Dottore sucks sure I like Tartaglia i really like him he's a very interesting personality Signora is dead she doesn't concern me anymore #and I don't know enough about the rest #Arlecchino looks very promising though I'm very intrigued by her #and so far Lyney and Lynette just seem like two people who got caught up in the organisation i don't have their vackgrounds unlocked yet #but!!!! i am intrigued Oh so very intrigued #Venti Kaeya and Diluc are my favourite genshin characters they have such a special place in my heart they mean so much to me #but Lyney is my favourite character in terms of I am normal about him Fontaine has SUCH a good cast #we have the girls of all time we have the silly magician and the socially anxious diver and then theres Manfred von Karma #if he was a genuinely nice man that had a solid moral compass and was actually devoted to the concept of justice #I like Neuvillette he also seems very interested i would Love to know more about his relationship with Furina #and Furina!!!!!! she's so silly I adore her being all confident and then if cuts to her inner monologue and she's just losing it #i love that #I really really like Fontaine so far the only grievance I have is that they should've put more accordion into the soundtrack but that's #irrelevant in the face of the osts just all being absolutely gorgeous #yumefan🌠🎼

[fountainpenguin]

I came across your story "Flypaper" about the superhero convention (Fun read! Highly recommend!) and I was just wondering if you had any other interaction headcanons that didn't make the final draft?

Oh thank you... and oh, yes. I didn't include him because I knew no one would know who he is, but I love one special, incredibly charming boy... King Off-Putting himself... Bruno :)

He is so very... uncomfortable to be around.

I had one line referencing Bruno and Danny in "Flypaper" but hhh... Dead Boy Duo, my beloved... I want them to be friends so bad, I want them to be sassy partners in the field, I want this with all my soul. They're brothers in spirit... Their moms have the same voice actor... Please, they would be so funny together.

I know there are oodles of fictional spy agencies in media, but I've always been a Bruno the Kid fan at heart. Ever since I first watched Danny Phantom, I've loved the idea of Globe getting in touch with Danny post-"Phantom Planet" and inviting him into the agency... Sometimes Bruno's villains canonically die instead of going to jail and I think Bruno and Danny would be a silly pair. Two "dead" (they got better!) cartoon boys goofing off and takin' names.

Specifically, Chick E. Love would have a flippin' field day burning holes in the Ghost Zone, unleashing wave after wave of ghosts into the world, and I just really want Bruno to do his "If I ever use a spy gadget the way it's intended I will die" schtick while Danny keeps dumping all the Fenton ghost-hunting gear on him...

I want the sassy boys to drive everyone up the wall. Bruno tolerated being bullied for about 5 seconds and then ruined that kid's life slkdjf. Cheerfully told Cy what he wanted to put on his tombstone. He does not mess around. I want Bruno to straight-up kill a man again and Danny to lose his mind.

Bruno is the boy who ran gleefully towards an electric fence with intent to climb it. He literally targeted HIMSELF with a missile in an attempt to win a chess game. I want the crossover joy of Danny throwing himself at everything that might kill Bruno and Bruno just Does Not Sweat It... Stupid.

[More under the cut]

Anyway yeah I have very normal feelings about "Dead Boy Walking" as an episode. Bruno's enemies pinning him down and injecting a terminal disease in his system... Bruno stumbling around until he hallucinates his best friend giving him self-care advice... Bruno quietly sitting down and staring into the void, separating himself from the ongoing conversation, instead of engaging in his usual banter... Boy crosses Australia on borrowed time, his legs give out beneath him at the worst moment, he's still wheezing about how he's going to do everything in his power to save others, just a little kid lying on the cold floor alone while Sydney gloats that he only has minutes left to live... His enemies making out over his unmoving body... I am so normal about this episode.

I just want Bruno and Danny to be friends :) I think they would vibe with each other even though they'd both want to bonk the other on the head. I so very badly want to see the first moment Danny realizes "Oh... Oh, this guy's, like... serious. He will kill people if I take my eyes off him." sldkfj Bruno's so intense and I love him. Danny is so tired and I love him. I want to see the first moment Bruno blearily wakes up to realize Danny just saved him from a ghost's revenge attack in the middle of the night. I love the Dead Boy Duo.

I only threw one line about these two hanging out in "Flypaper," but in my heart they spent the whole convention together because they're co-workers... they are buddies, your honor.

I do not think WordGirl would like Bruno at all because he comes off as a smarmy, know-it-all creep to those who aren't familiar with his sense of humor... Kid Math should not be left alone with him because he's very impressionable and Bruno is a terrible influence slkjdf.

Here's a little deleted scene I had:

I also had a loose draft for a scene of WordGirl and Super Why getting milkshakes with some other hero friends when Kid Math finds them again. WordGirl greets him like "Oh, how's your day going?" and Kid Math is just... very overwhelmed from his experience of interacting with two fast-paced sassy kids while he's still struggling to grasp the concept of superhero banter. Like. Bruno and Danny would destroy him. Blow his mind. There's no coming back from that.

So yeah, Bruno was definitely at the convention... I just didn't show him apart from that one-liner about him hanging out with Danny. "Flypaper" was really fun to write. I don't plan to do a crossover like this again any time soon, but the convention was a cool setting to explore and I'm glad you enjoyed! <3

One of my favorite stupid jokes in "Flypaper" is that Romeo was being a troublemaker in the daytime and WordGirl asked if he was "even allowed to do that" since he's supposed to be a "nighttime villain" in the PJ Masks lore... But tbh I watched a lot of Romeo clip compilations before this story and ?? apparently it's just a thing that Romeo regularly commits crime during the day and the PJ Masks literally hang back and wait until nightfall before they fight him?? That's SO funny to me.

(I also don't understand when the PJ Masks sleep and if anyone has the answer, please drop it in my inbox because I'd love to know but I also don't want to binge the series over this, ha ha)

I also wanted to make a joke about Alphapig being 5 years younger than the rest of the Super Readers because the amount I lost my mind when I saw that on the [unsourced] Super Why wiki was indescribable. POV: One of your friends is a princess, at least one is in college, and you're starting high school.

(I'm dying at the idea of three 10-year-olds running around Storybrook Village and there's a 5-year-old tagging along with them. The mental image of 7-year-old Whyatt taking a 3 or 4-year-old pig under his wing as his new friend... Such a good boy.)

After Tobey launched Romeo off his robot, I had WordGirl catch him, but I'd originally hoped to have Kick Buttowski catch him because I thought writing cool skateboard rescue mission would be fun. It seemed like it would just be shoving in an extra character who didn't need to be there, though, and it risked dragging down the scene with introductions and descriptions, but in my heart, Kick was at the convention too. Extreme.

I think another of my fave dumb jokes was just... WordGirl approaching the superhero panel she's supposed to speak on, she looks out into the crowd, but then she's like "Oh no the entire Paw Patrol are watching me, this is so much pressure."

Nothing to see here, just Baby Dog Squad taking notes... I still think about that randomly throughout the day and giggle. I love this 'fic.

#Danny Phantom #Bruno the Kid #WordGirl #Super Why #PJ Masks Romeo #Kid Math #Dead Boy Duo #Flypaper #I have seen the Paw Patrol movie twice with no show context and it's really good and I highly recommend tbh #It's a superhero movie but they get stuck in traffic / have breakdowns / get hurt by falling buildings it's so good #Opening scene is a guy disappointed to be saved by dogs and Chase is like 'You're in shock so I'm not gonna take that personally' #Not to be dramatic but Bruno/Leecy is literally my favorite OTP of all time... they love and support each other SO MUCH #Boy really waited two hours for her to arrive late to a concert and instead of complaining took her hand and bought her ice cream #He called and asked her to hack into secret gov't files and she was down without even knowing he's a spy... I love Leecy #I am so very normal about the series finale hooooooly cow #asks #Anon #ridwriting #Sassy kinderspy and co #Going ghost! #apparently art #Grammar queen #Arithmetic Lad #Main Phantom trio #Recommendation Wednesday #None of these is Wednesday #Read Mores are still glitchy if anyone was wondering :)

[disabled-queer-culture-is]

Disabled culture is going to see a doctor about a new medical scare and being able to predict exactly what they’re going to suggest, because it’s the exact same thing every doctor tells you for everything

#disabled culture is #ableism tw #medical ableism #like. ma’am. i just had a terrifying experience and am seeking medical help to make sure it doesnt become a regular occurrence #you do not need to treat me like a toddler #‘just eat more and get your bmi to a better range and you’ll be fine :)’ MA’AM #i am aware i weigh about as much as a sopping wet kitten but i am not here about the autoimmune disease causing that #i am here because i fainted hit my head and felt like i was experiencing violet involuntary movement even though i wasn’t #anyway congrats to this doctor for taking two hours to tell me something i learned from talking with potsies like 6 years ago #anyway my shock thoughts are really funny. she pressed on my nails to check for dehydration and my single thought was #‘thats not how they did it on mythbusters >:(‘ #fr tho uhhh fainting is super scary and i salute everyone who deals with it regularly #also is it normal to like. #i felt like my head was jerking around and I couldn’t stop it and that lasted for like a full minute after i was aware again #couldn’t talk or move like my arms or anything while it was happening #doctor literally just waved me off when i asked. if anyone has any insight on why i felt like that when my head wasnt moving pls lemme know #also tbh i dont even know if it technically counts as fainting. my eyes were open the whole time apparently #but everything before and after the fall for about a minute is blank #anyway uh! we think im fine! no blood and probably no concussion the only thing with major damage is the wall lol

[savrenim]

gods nov 5th is the gift that keeps giving

#I recently have been dragged into I guess sort of the boku no hero academia fandom in the funniest of ways #which is to say I read a crossover fic went 'huh that's good' and decided to read more fic while also deciding to never watch the show #which I've only done for one fandom before and tbh it might legit be a more fun fanfiction reading experience than the normal one #it is WILD trying to reverse-engineer what is simply well-accepted fan theory and what is actual canon #I've definitely gotten a few guesses wrong but the osmosis process is really fun #(esp bc if you want to be a good detective you have to check dates; even people writing very carefully close to canon #might have written a fic before canon came out) #BUT ANYWAYS I guess I read BNHA fic now it's actually pretty good #probably bc there are multiple characters that fit my standard..... not even 'blorbo' preferences #my 'you have a backstory and/or situation that means fanfic written about you is most likely going to hit the spot' preferences #1 defs being Eraserhead bc let's be real 'I am a very tired gruff teacher working two jobs at once who does not get any sleep and has #against my own will adopted all of you why is this happening to me I'm so tired' is The Most Relatable #Hawks bc Crafted Into A Weapon From Childhood is The Weapons Feels^TM #and then Dabi bc that was the crossover that I read that was fun ok it was a silly jjk crossover of 'what if Gojo is reincarnated as Dabi' #that just transferred all my 'HELLO FAVORITE CHARACTER' emotions onto Dabi who then I go and look up and has also the sort of backstory #that makes him fave character material #SO here I am sitting here just generally happy with all of this watching my annual Nov 5th meme compilation #and LO AND BEHOLD there is strong arm 'trending during the us election: destiel/ BNHA' meme #and I'm going 'what the fuuuuuuuck my new favorite fandom aLSO TRENDED IN THE NOV 5TH CHAOS????' #so obviously I had to look up why #WELL THE WHY WAS DABI BACKSTORY REVEAL #anyways my housemate had to check on me as to why I was screaming and it turns out that indeed nov 5th #is the gift that keeps on giving #if you have read this far down in my tags I feel like you now know uncomfortably personal things about me #esp if you know enough about BNHA to understand all of that #so if you have any fic recs About My Favs I'm taking them I esp enjoy canon retellings bc it's REALLY fun to try to figure out #which bits of those are actually canon

[moe-broey]

Hmmmm.....

#i've been at my sister's for like? four days? three? idk i have no sense of time #decided to just stay once she got back/weather was real bad anyway. unexpected snowstorm #power's been out for like? two days? at my place? and a bunch of our friends places too lmfao #i think it'll come back soon people are working on it. but. hhhhhh #i actually have A Lot of trouble focusing deeply if i'm not in my own space and ESP if i'm around others #idk why i'm built like that. i brought all my art stuff but i am so aimless....... head empty......... #and then there's my thoughts that just unceremoniously got cut off LMFAO sorry #was gonna do an in-depth look at thrasir/veronica through an aromantic lense #i've been meaning to do that for a while but like. for certain things the vibe has to be Just Right #like if i'm not actively going insane about it it's just not happening LMFAOO #same for my bigger project too........ my comic............ please come back to me........ #i really don't know what to do though. i'm not discontent i'm just bothered i'm not making use of my time #LIKE. ESP. when you take meds to be A Functioning Human. you feel a deep need to make the most of it. #not even like capitalist productivity propaganda wise. but honestly the fact that i do have to pay to live 'normally' #is a side effect of that tbh. capitalism is the problem. as always. we should destroy america #hhhhh.... i will. attemtp to draw. 🫡

[freddiekluger]

super super fun being a trans person in australia rn having to fear for the safety of my trans friends who are able to be out on the streets protesting and organising even with covid and attending self defence collectives to protect themselves from being hate crimed more than they already have, all while doing what i can from isolation on top of dealing with the general trans disabled shit and then interacting with my cis friends who like. can't even be bothered to ask a simple how are you holding up or are you okay when literal homegrown nazis are advocating for the end of trans existence on the steps of state parliament and groups of religious fundamentalists are harassing people en masse in local queer suburbs with police protection. heaven forbid they actually try to help us in any meaningful way or even signal that they care at all

#there's something about watching your friends begin to opt out of politics as they start thinking it doesn't affect them personally that #sucks tbh. its so fucked up because while on the one hand the fact that i am nowhere near having the kind of financial independence #i would need even to start hormones is awful and really does a number on me rn i cant help but be grateful for the fact that i know i'm a #hell of a lot safer because i just look like a quirky alt cis woman to most people instead of a clocky gnc man #idk many feelings i have been exhausted lately so excuse the lack of activity and vent post ✌️ #dont even get me started on the fact that pretty much the only person i know who takes covid seriously anymore because i know i can't #risk pretending it doesnt affect me. i havent had meaningful physical contact in like two years its fine though im feeling really normal

[anaalnathrakhs]

i WILL show up to the trial day for the preparatory class tomorrow no matter how much i dont want to and after that i guarantee NOTHING

#broadcasting my misery #vent #this is a lie i guarantee i will keep tumbling through life appearing functional and melting down in the privacy of my own home afterwards #<- trying to jinx my naturally contrarian ass into taking care of myself for once #god i'm tired #i am. slightly peeved. #around 11am i was like ''i think i'm going to go home'' and my friend was like WHAT nooooooo what are you going to do at home anyway #and we ended up hanging out w another friend until fucking 4pm #and she was like oooooh guys i think i'm gonna go else i wont have energy tomorrow #haha bitch where was this mindset when i told you i was going to go home #i don't know why i keep like. telling people stuff like ''i'm [emotion] i'm going to [thing]'' #and they just plan stuff w me anyway #and like. i can't decide for them what's important or not to them. so i make an effort and i participate to the best of my ability. #but it KEEPS HAPPENING #OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN #it does not stop #i can barely keep the violent impulses down tbh i act like im on crack in public #bc if i dont walk around and spasm like an epileptic stray cat im gonna start giving in to the urge to dive under a bus or punch someone #i have nearly uncontrollable fits of hitting my head against walls when my entire life i was too chicken to do it despite trying to #i gained about fifteen to twenty fucking kilograms in the last three months #because i cannot fucking stop binging and EVERYBODY'S LIFE seems to revolve around food #my friends are incapable of hanging out without going to buy smth no matter at which time we get out of school #my other friends seem incapable of not checking calories VERY LOUDLY and calculating how much they lost walking around #my mom and i are home and awake at the same time abt two hours a day and one and a half of that is spent making/eating dinner lmao #im making the effort holy shit i am but i'm going to start being violent soon #i've started trying to strangle my cat twice in the past week i think #i'll show up tomorrow bc it's an opportunity and im not stupid enough to miss that by lack of self esteem #but really what is it good for #my friend isnt very delicate in her way to say it but she's right. i'm not cut out for being normal like that #i can sorta seem functional but you very quickly start seeing i don't know how to dress

[astrxealis]

arctic monkeys in the philippines raghh raghhhhhh raghhhhhhhhhh

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #i am not going unfortunately but i am going to the 1975 in a. month? or so? two months? SO RAGHHHHHHHHHHH #u see my mom actually asked! heyy are u into them... like late last year and i was like kinda but mostly lune #I DID NOT KNOW THEY WERE GOING HERE UNTIL LAST MONTH !! <- stupid #tbf i only got more into their songs lately too. so yeah #idm not going but i hope everyone going has fun <3 wish i could go too but like i said it's alright! #i wna go to an mcr concert so badly tbh. hope they come here and i convince parents #uhh hozier bet will never go here ... he has never. and i doubt ever will SOBS #so enjoy !! <3 #i am just. really excited for may oh my god i die every time i see love it if we made it live online #i will die then ... happily #also i think its cute how i often say 'our' instead of 'my' #uh. out of context doesnt make sense! but basically since i have a twin and we're super close yeah we include each other in almost anything #everything* + funnily sometimes we think scarily similar and really do things uh. yeah #would love to ramble about that another time bcs i'm sure it's uncommon lol not everyone has a twin #some people act normal meeting us some people are so shocked some people tell me they want a twin too and it's all weird and fascinating #how it's the most normal thing in the world for me but what about when people meet one of us and the other later? #and being friends with twins... i wonder how it feels. + we're closer than a lot of twins bcs we're insanely close but fight a TON. so. ya #anyways yeah my classmate once mentioned to me how she thinks its cute how i refer as 'us' and 'ours' even if shes not present then hehe #okay i will play games now... and continue homework later #stress ngl. cramming so badly! but i'll do my best aaa i know i got this