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danwhobrowses · 7 months

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My Highlights for AEW Wrestledream 2023

There was a dream, a dream of wrestling

And Antonio Inoki sought that dream when he founded NJPW

But now AEW has invited the dangling from its hinges Forbidden Door open again to celebrate Inoki on the anniversary of his death.

Let's see what was good about this show

Spoilers for the PPV

Zero Hour

"She's so sweet, but so dumb, god bless her" Richard of House Starks speaking of Lexy Nair, fiancée of one large William

Props for the Julia vignette, it aired on Collision and apparently someone on twitter helped film it so good for them

Stokely 'Urban Dictionary dot com' Hathaway

TK donning the Inoki scarf with Inoki's grandkids, Shibata and Rocky

Christian Cage Noooooo

Athena doing Billie's jump and Keith's Limitless pose, and then almost blindsided by Kojima XD

Meat chants always a win

Athena saved her minion!

Josh Barnett looks like a leaner Brock Lesnar don't he?

Moxley joining on commentary, showing he's well after the concussion too

I think that's an open invitation to Bloodsport for Claudio

Well, you can tell that Nick Wayne has trained with Darby, mans is bumping

Caster already going for the tentacle porn diss

Sounds like JR is open to scissoring

Main Card

MJF wearing as many belts as he has initials

Picking the right person to massage his shoulders

Alas no tag partner in the corner for Max

Dutch always has a great Bossman Slam

Some Guerrero tactics there, with some added pantomime by the audience

And he hits the bodyslam! The Seattle Stampede

MJF has put over a bodyslam, a double clothesline and a dropkick (Kangaroo Kick) which is proof that with enough charisma any move can be put over

Props to the dude in full Jeff Hardy cosplay

Shibata starting low like Inoki did vs Ali

Thesz drop early just like Inoki took it early vs him for his second ever NJPW match (first was vs Simon Gotch)

Uraken kicked out at 1!

Eddie again winning with the Powerbomb, he meant what he said to Kawada

Dang that crack as Statlander socked Julia

And Julia does have one hell of a moonsault

Brody having to carry his goth daughter back down the ramp

Reminder Julia Hart is 22 in November; younger than Hayes, Stratton, Dragunov, Dominik, Jade, Statlander, Anna, HOOK and more, she is a talent

Starting the 4 way with an International Title preview

and then OC tagging in??

Gunns doing the New Day 'both legal men' attempt

HOOK sold that superkick really well too

"It's always in their hometown huh?"

Nana gets his dance in

Serve remains that guy, so clean

Ooof, taking a trick out of Penta's book eh, Killshot?

Vicious discus lariat there from Hanger

The JML Driver is great too

Mox back on Commentary, he's one flirtation with Excalibur away from being Regal

Ricky's rope walk is just effortless

Ah poor Mox, he can't help but curse it's native to his vocabulary

Seahawks colours for Bryan

Moxley's passion for wrestling is shining through a lot in commentary, if he could control the cussing he could easily be an all timer play by play commentator

It also juxtaposes Nigel McGuinness' anti-Bryan vendetta

Bryan practically walked out of that Romero Special

Hitting the Itoh special with the rollover half crab

GOODNESS that Dragon Screw

I think his head was already fucking kicked in sheesh

That certainly was a technical masterclass, and it doesn't feel like we're done

I'm gonna say it too, give Bryan the IWGP World title. I mean it, he's beaten Okada and ZSJ, he could beat SANADA at like Sakura Genesis or New Year's Dash, have a little run with it, do the G1 and then drop it at Forbidden Door and then he's completed all his career goals

Mox's genuine surprise as he thought Demetrius Johnson was gonna wrestle Kenny Omega XD

I mean that Last Supper artwork is...definitely something

Geez starting with Omega/Ospreay?

People want Takeshita/Ibushi, that tells you how elevated Takeshita has been

Callis trying to contribute to increating the stretch

Ibushi now joining Suzuki in 'he does what he wants', joining the Sex Gods pose

'You still suck' chants because Sammy still pulled off a picture perfect Shooting Star Press

Jericho invoking Omega in the Not Even One kickout

Murder Ibushi activated!

That is the best Ibushi has looked in AEW so far, hopefully he gets 100% for Takeshita

Dang just let Dax and Davis slap each other for 10 minutes, Davis has wrestled WALTER I know he has it in him

I've seen enough, I don't just need 10 minutes I need a full tournament of big beefy men slapping man meat; Dax, Davis, Keith Lee, Shane Taylor, Wardlow, Luchasaurus, Butcher, Brody King, Joe, Hobbs, Miro, Brian Cage, Big Bill, etc. let them all fight, give us the whole Buffet

Darby and Christian have done so much work that'll go understated in restoring the TNT title, it's main eventing a PPV!

Also if anyone can will it into existence we need Christian to start calling himself the Turtle Neck Titan, you know because Turtlenecks but also TNT

Hoisted by his own petard, blinded by the turtle neck

I mean Nick Wayne's mom is hot you gotta shoot your shot

Well that is for sure a Darby Allin bump, right on the steps twice over

Frog Splash onto a stretcher!

And a Killswitch on the canvas boards!

Scorpion Death Drop and Coffin Drop on the boards only for two

Nick Wayne heel turn

You think you know him? Adam Copeland is All Elite! And he brought Metalingus with him

He was so excited he glided through the smoke!

Edge, Christian and Sting all in the same ring what year is it? what timeline is it? WHAT IS IT???

Conclusion

Well that was a lot of fun.

Compared to No Mercy it was perhaps marginally better for me, again this could be due to being more in the loop with the storylines but stuff like the trios match, the main event, Swerve vs Hangman, the ultimate tekkers match it just clicked. Not a bad match on the card too, though I was rooting for Aussie Open to win, but Bucks/FTR IV will still be great. Plus I still wanted to see Statlander body slam Brody.

I do hope Fénix is okay, he disappeared from the 4-Way and he's the International champion, don't want back to back injury-induced title changes after all. But it was good to see Moxley just out there enjoying himself on the side, probably won't ever get to do it again mind you given all the cussing but still, did elevate the matches.

We've got intriguing directions too; Swerve needs to get somewhere with that W over Hangman (world title? I mean I kinda like Jay White for it, International Title? Maybe too soon), Claudio and Bryan have extended rematch invitations and you know Ricky ain't done with the BCC (still though I wouldn't put him in the BCC, Garcia should have that spot), even the Zero Hour did some development with Billie and Athena's dynamic.

So yeah, probably not better than All In and All Out but still pretty damn good, Inoki would be proud.

Match of the Night: I mean it's the Ultimate Battle of Epic Tekkers right? Hard to really say any match was better than that wrestling-wise. The Main Event is a close second with the drama. Best Entrance: Julia Hart gets this one just ahead of Adam Copeland's worst kept secret, not many flashy entrances in this show, in fact I think OC/Hook and Jericho didn't even get entrances. Best Attire: Again, not many here, most of them were kinda subtle so I'm gonna give it to Swerve so I can give him props somewhere. Best Performance: Tie for Bryan and Zack, masters of their craft, not much else you can say. Spot of the Night: Because Christian dropping Darby on the steps was messy and scrappy, it's Bryan's Dragon Screw that just looked so vicious like I'm sure I saw his foot facing another direction.

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nadja-antipaxos · 1 year

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ALL MY PICTURES OF YOU - PART TWO

previously - part one || masterlist

Title: If only I’d thought of the right words, I could have held onto your heart

Rating: Teen

Warnings: some swearing and mentions of sex, but nothing explicit, pregnancy, brief mention of infertility, eventual character death cause it's in the movie

Note: I had planned this out forever ago and finally got around to it. I had to dream up who Callie's mom was. I absolutely adore Jade and wouldn't mind exploring more of her with Egon, even in an AU setting (where he doesn’t leave) but I want to see if there's interest. Please leave kudos and comments if you enjoy it. Thank you so much. Art by @lilvicsart send her all the commissions.

Word Count: 2,625

Phoebe leads her family, the Ghostbusters, and Gary down to the outhouse via fire pole. The sight of it causes Ray to burst into laughter which causes Phoebe to stare at her shrugging mother. Inside joke?

Phoebe shows them a table with a film reel next to a projector. She hooks it up and it starts playing.

Jade sat on a stool. Her short legs dangled off the sides not even touching the ground. She laughed as the camera focused on her. Her brown hair was long in a French braid and she had on a light wash pair of overalls decorated in paint splatters.

“This is serious.” A deep voice said off-camera.

“Sorry. Sorry. Serious. Right. Okay. I’m Jade Margolis-Spengler. I am 29 years old. Mother of one. Wife of one, I hope. I’m an artist and I’m getting my Ph.D. in Art History at Columbia. I, um.” Jade put her hand over her mouth to stifle her laughter. There was a heavy sigh off camera.

“Stay there. I need to get something.” Footsteps faded and Jade hopped off the stool. She looked into the camera and smiled.

“I’m so sorry. You’ll probably get rid of this, but I just wanna say you’re so smart and I love you so much and I love our family. You make me so happy I can’t help myself. I never thought I’d be domestic. You gave me everything I didn’t know I needed, Egon.” She blew a kiss. “Okay, bye.”

She got back on the stool and the footsteps sounded again.

“You ready?”

“Mhmm.”

“Jadie, this is a serious experiment. I need your honest reaction and testimony.”

“I’m as serious as a heart attack, babe.” Her big brown eyes lock on him.

“Don’t look at me. Look at the camera.”

“Sorry.”

The footage fades until the projector screen is white again. Callie wipes her eyes. She’s never seen her parents together. She let go of all of those memories. It was easier to remember him as no one. But god, he made her so happy.

“Grandma looked so young.” Trevor comments.

“And beautiful,” Gary adds. “Not to make it weird. She was just very fetching. The smile and the eyes—”

“Yeah, Jade was beautiful. So full of joy.” Winston cuts him off. “Whenever I think of her, she looks like that.”

“Where did you find that, Pheebs?” Callie turns to her daughter.

“On this workbench. But I think there’s more stuff in this.” She takes her mother’s hand and guides her over to a cabinet. She opens it to reveal a safe. “Don’t know the code though.”

“Hmm.” Callie kneels down and punches in the one date that comes to mind. It springs open.

“How did you know?”

“Grandma’s birthday.”

There are two leather-bound journals and tin cans with film reels. Winston steps over and picks up the safe to bring back to the table.

“Jade got him that camera for experiments, but they used it for everything.” He sets it down.

“How about we get some breakfast and see what’s on these?” Callie suggests.

After they eat, they come back down and gather around the screen.

“Jade, Jade. How does it feel to have successfully procreated with a Spengbot?” Peter asked. She had a pink sundress on and looked very pregnant. She was so petite she looked like a doll that swallowed a planet.

“Fuck off, Peter.” She rolled her eyes.

Peter kept the camera on her and Egon came into view with a bag of chips. The second he sat down on the couch, she got into his lap. He handed her the open bag.

“Exactly what I wanted.” She kissed him on the cheek.

“Venkman, leave my wife alone and stop asking her stupid questions.” Egon glared at him.

“Then he wouldn’t be able to talk at all.” Jade stuck her tongue out.

“I normally can’t stand that kind of slander. You get a pass because you’re pregnant.” Peter warned.

“Lucky me.” She sighed.

Egon did not pay him any attention. His focus was on Jade as she settled her back into his chest. His hand rested on her large stomach.

“How are you feeling?” His hand was on her wrist.

“Fine.” She munched on another chip.

“Your pulse is a little quick. You okay?” He looked down at her.

“I’m in the arms of a handsome man. I think if it wasn’t I’d be dead.” She raised her eyebrows.

“Okay, this is disgusting.” Peter covered the camera with his hand. “Ever since you got together it’s just all about you.”

“I stand by that,” Peter comments in the present day.

The rest of the film reels were of Callie. Egon and Callie fast asleep with her in his arms. Jade brushing her hair. Callie crawling around. They were like a real family. Callie can see why he took those with him when he left.

After the expansive trip down memory lane, they spend the rest of the day with the Ghostbusters in Summerville. The town’s a little wrecked, but nowhere near as bad as it could’ve been. Callie waits until everyone has gone to sleep before cracking open her father’s journals. His handwriting was sharp, thin, and in all capital letters as opposed to her mother’s beautiful cursive. He was definitely a scientist through and through.

-Venkman and Dana went to her new apartment for a party. Stayed in the lab instead. No new developments.

-New client: Jade Margolis. Shorter than average at 5’2” and 110lbs. Slight hourglass shape with a curve to the hips. Brunette with large dark eyes. Husky voice. Artist. Claims ghost in the studio. Smokes, constantly. Not very safe considering the flammable nature of paint. Does not seem too scared by the idea of ghosts except for the tarp incident. Claims to have seen stranger things on the subway, but that might be a joke. Wants things fixed ASAP. Venkman knows her as a friend of Dana’s.

-Definitely a presence of poltergeist in the studio. Ray continues to research and I observe. Presence tried to knock the client off her ladder. Intervened before injury could occur. The client's perfume smells floral and has very soft skin. My pulse quickened probably due to the adrenaline of the situation.

-Client agrees to be used as bait to lure out a malevolent presence. Turned angry and choked her, but was apprehended before extreme harm could be caused. She’s more upset about the price than her injuries.

-My pulse seems to quicken when she’s around despite the normal circumstances of her paying for our services. Insists I call her Jade. I look over her injuries and give her some topical ointment. She’s intrigued by the number of fungi in my lab and suggests we test out psychedelic effects. I’ve always thought of trying it but never knew how to broach the subject with the guys. The mushroom tea is not very strong, but something about her causes my heartbeat to pick up. I feel my skin get hot when she gets closer. She has such large eyes. I tell her this because they are captivating. She wants to go to dinner with me.

-I tell the guys about what happened and how she makes me feel. They say it’s normal and that I’m attracted to her. It’d be foolish not to be.

-Dinner was nice. I felt we were at an impasse since I do not study art and she does not know much about science. She says we can teach each other. I like that. Her optimism is very natural.

-Even though dinner was over, I did not want her to leave. We go for a walk and I see other couples kissing and holding hands. I usually don’t like too much physical contact due to germs. She did not make any move indicating she wanted any affection. An idiotic bike messenger nearly mowed her down. I was able to guide her out of harm’s way, but I was livid. It did not lead to a physical altercation with the messenger and she was okay.

-I do ask if I can hold her hand. Mine is much larger than hers and seems to make hers disappear. Her skin is very soft. Her father is a dentist (which explains her perfectly straight teeth) and her mother is a teacher. They have some money on her mother’s side which is how she has been able to continue her studies without having a full time career.

-I walk her home to a modest apartment. I have the urge to call her as soon as I make it back to the firehouse.

-Jade Margolis fascinates me. When I am not working, I find myself wanting to spend all my time with her. Venkman says this is quite normal. I kiss her on the second date and it’s something I’d like to do over and over. She is led by whatever brings her joy. She loves to laugh and even asked if she could try out the fire pole. She was not scared at all despite her small frame. The other day, she showed Janine how to do some stretches on the floor. I had no idea she was so flexible. I ran straight into the wall. Jade never wants to bother me in the lab, so she has come up with creative ways of getting my attention. Her favorite is to tickle the back of my ear with her paintbrush. It’s her favorite because it is effective and it makes me smile.

- My green sweater is missing. I don’t remember leaving it anywhere, but I will be on the look out for it. Update: Found the sweater at Jade’s apartment. It does not fit but I found her sleeping in it.

-Likes: banana cream pie, hydrangea, thrift stores, cooking

-Dislikes: scrambled eggs, coffee (without copious amounts of milk and sugar), math, coconuts

-Healthy sexual appetite. See separate log for copulation techniques. Very vocal and communicative.

-I told her I loved her. She feels the same. This led to a vigorous bout of lovemaking.

-Finished making the ring and plan to propose next week

-She agreed to marry me and did not let me finish my list of pros before she accepted.

-The wedding was at the courthouse with little fuss. Her mother threw a reception that was far more expensive than either of us would have liked. Jade looked beautiful. See the photo below.

-No surprise, excessive sexual relations with little protection have led to conception. Jade is 8 weeks pregnant.

-I am much more nervous about this than she is, so I don’t want to worry her.

-Jade wants to name the child (a girl) Calliope. We agreed on Callie.

-Callie Spengler is born. There is nothing I will not do for her.

-Ghostbusters have stopped working together after numerous lawsuits, but we all remain in touch. Jade spends her time with her Ph.D., Callie, and me.

-Had to intervene because a drunk man at the bar was complaining about the Ghostbusters and Jade was going to attack him. I picked her up and threw her over my shoulder before she could cause him any harm. She continued to threaten the man who was much larger than her over my shoulder. I carried her all the way home and hid my smile. Pent-up energy was put to good use in the bedroom. I feel extraordinarily lucky to have such a passionate partner.

-Jade cut her hair. Thought I wouldn’t like it. See the photo below:

-Mood slime. See other log.

-Bad news from the doctor. More children will not be possible. Jade is sad, but it doesn’t matter to me. Callie is all we need.

-Discouraging findings about Gozer. Will continue to research.

-Ghostbusters continue to be in business, but something far more pressing is coming.

-I won’t let anything happen to Jade or Callie. I can’t. I love them too much.

-Jade had an anxiety attack. She’s suffering and so is Callie. I can’t continue to hurt them, but the research has to be done. I can’t stay. She will never understand. I love her. I love Callie. I know she will never believe that.

-Oklahoma is dry and flat. Jade mailed the divorce papers. Janine passes along the photos she gets from Jade. Callie will need braces soon. They moved to Chicago.

-Jade got a job at the Art Institute of Chicago and teaches at Columbia College and DePaul. There are many articles about her support of gay students. Callie is involved in ballet. Does not seem to be interested in science. She is getting tall.

-Jade received an award for her teaching. The first of many I am certain.

-Callie graduated high school and will be going to college in Ohio.

-Callie had a baby. A boy. His name is Trevor. Jade included a photo when she sent Janine a Christmas card. She looked very happy.

-It does not look like Callie married, but she had another child. A daughter named Phoebe. They spend a lot of time with Jade. She loves being a grandmother.

-Jade’s parents have died. She told Janine she put some money away for Trevor and Phoebe’s education. Their father seems to have left but nothing breaks Jade.

-I called her house but didn’t know what to say. I just wanted to hear her. She cussed me out and hung up.

-See below.

“Beloved professor, artist, and LGBT advocate, Jade Margolis, dies at 62 from bus accident”

Twitter has been filled with posts about Dr. Margolis and the love she has given the city and students of Chicago. Known for her series exploring her bisexuality and fierce support of LGBT students. She was the curator at the Art Institute while teaching at Columbia College and DePaul University. Talented photographer, she has published two books, and had a gallery in Fulton Market. She is survived by her daughter and two grandchildren. Will be buried in Hebrew Benevolent Cemetery. In lieu of flowers, family requests donations to the ACLU.

- I drove to Chicago to see her gravesite. Doesn’t seem real. Feels like part of me is missing. I’ve heard of people experiencing phantom limbs after amputation. When she was alive, I missed her, but I knew she was safe. I tried to reach out, but she never seemed the type to linger. There is no reason why she would appear in the farmhouse, but I want her to. I wish I could see her again. I want her to peer over my shoulder and ask what I’m working on. I want her to know why I did all this. Why I gave her and Callie up for this lonely life. When I die, I hope I see her again. I don’t care about heaven or hell. I just want to see her. I wanna see Jadie again.

“I hope you did, Dad.” Callie closes the journal.

Fast asleep in her room, Phoebe sees her grandma with her short dark hair streaked with grey and her cat eye glasses. She has a purple shawl around her. She watches her daughter hugging her father. Then she turns and catches Phoebe’s eye. She blows her a kiss and Phoebe catches it. Egon moves back from Callie and Jade nudges him in the ribs with her elbow before taking his hand. Phoebe can’t hear what they’re saying, but her grandfather laughs. They disappear into the night sky walking hand in hand.

#ghostbusters #ghostbusters II #ghostbusters afterlife #egon spengler #egon spengler x oc #egon spengler x ofc #oc: jade margolis #callie spengler #phoebe spengler #trevor spengler #tw infertility #tw pregnancy #fan fic

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hansoulo · 4 years

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partial to the cavatina - pt. 2 (first date)

Pairing: Javier Peña/fem!Reader

Warnings: uhhhh cursing? fluff, general tomfoolery, javi is Soft™

Word Count: 1.14k

Gif Credit: x by @damerondjarin

A/N: takes place in season 3. i have. plans. >:)

part one playlist

You could hear music playing on a small radio on the restaurant counter, faint and lively underneath the sounds of conversation and the dull swinging of the overhead fans. The place wasn’t fancy, which was something you appreciated. All the employees seemed to be family members, the customers locals and long-time friends. You got the feeling Javier didn’t make a habit of taking people here often.

The day was warm, easy and honey-slow the way Spanish countries always felt. A hand on the small of your back guided you to a table, the plastic chair scraping linoleum when Javier pulled it out for you. So chivalry isn’t dead.

A few minutes later and you held a drink in your hands, condensation gathering cold on your palms as you thanked the waiter.

“I don’t usually do this,” Javier admitted after a moment as you looked over the menu laid on the table. You glanced up for a moment, cocking your head.

“You don’t eat dinner?” you inquired innocently, still looking at the list of appetizers.

“What? No- I-”

“Kidding, Javier. It’s a joke. Funny. Haha,” you deadpanned, trying to keep your expression schooled to avoid laughing. It didn’t really work and a moment later you grinned, resting your face in your hands as you looked back at him. He relaxed at this, the furrow in his brow smoothing over. He looked nice. Handsome.

“I know what you mean,” you assured him. “I don’t really, either. Especially not with… Embassy agents.” You crinkled your nose a bit, recalling past dates involving tapped phones and botched pick-up lines.

“How’d you know I-”

“I see you leave the building sometimes,” you said over your drink, spinning the plastic straw around until the ice cubes rattled. “CIA?”

Javier coughed at this, shifting awkwardly in his seat. “No, uh- janitorial services.”

You offered a wry smile, raising your eyebrows. “Janitorial services, huh?” You took another sip before speaking. “So DEA?”

He let out a quiet chuckle, his own hand curled around a stunted whiskey glass. “Yeah,” Javier answered with a small sigh. “You’re a teacher, right?”

“Mhm. English and music over at the international school,” you said, pointing to the bag slung over the back of your chair. “I think I still have some assignments in there to grade.” You twisted around to pull out a small stack of thin paper workbooks, setting them down in front of him. “They’re sweet kids,” you mused. “Very... interesting.”

Javier huffed a small laugh, flipping through the pages. “Interesting how?”

“Well, you know how kids are,” you said as the waiter came by again. You both ordered and turned back to each other, chairs scooted in a bit closer than before and your bare knees brushing against denim. Everything was warm, your head growing slightly dizzy and light-headed. You chalked it up to the weather.

“They um-” you began, the words drifting off as your eyes caught the open buttons of his shirt. “They just…”

His expression grew concerned. “Everything okay?”

“Hm? Oh yeah, yeah I just got-” you said, following the curve of his throat as he swallowed whiskey. “Distracted,” you finished with a smile.

The rest of the evening passed by in an easy back-and-forth, a comfortable volley of stories and jibes and debates about food. When you finally admitted that yes, this is the best restaurant, okay? Javier grinned, a bit awkward and boyish in a way that had your heart stuttering on its quickened pulses.

You’d heard things about him, which was probably more than he could say for you. From girls, friends of friends that made a habit of attractive men and low expectations. It wasn’t really your scene but you caught whispers of a man, an American agent with dark hair who was only interested in things he could drink or fuck. You brushed it off then and you thought about it now, watching with curious eyes as he called for the bill.

A quiet part of your head reminded you that you didn’t really know him, that you’d never seen him when he was out in the field or at bars and for all you knew he could be a completely different person. You’d only ever talked like what, three times? Once, calling out across your apartment windows, then on the phone when he asked if you were free Friday night (you could be, why?), and then… here. Now. Sitting in a tiny Colombian restaurant practically eating off of each other’s plates, surrounded by the sound of cooking food and overlapping voices.

Javier hadn’t seemed anything like what they’d told you, though. He was sweet. Gentleman-like, in his own way. A little hollow and a little jaded but you couldn’t really blame him for that - not with everything he’d been through. Maybe only time could tell.

-------

You stood on the stoop of your apartment building, shielded from the summer rain by a leather jacket draped over your shoulders. Walking had seemed a good idea in the beginning but the first drops had come down right before you left, leaving your hair damp and your ankles wet. The glossy asphalt of city streets reflected headlights and distant sirens, streaking and dotted underneath a sky that was quickly becoming dark.

You protested when Javier took the jacket from his arms but he didn’t listen. “Let me play the hero,” he’d said as you held it above your head, enveloped in warmth and the faint scent of smoke. You smiled at this but caught the dip of his chin as you walked, his expression tinged with something empty before he caught your eye and shook his head, swinging an arm around you.

“I had fun,” you said as you reached for your keys. Javier leaned against the doorway, watching as you undid the lock.

“Me too,” he answered, his voice slightly raspy with the cigarette he’d had after dinner. “We should uh- we should do this again. If you want,” he offered. You turned towards him, leading him towards you with a hand held loosely around his shirt collar.

You weren’t normally this bold. Hell, you were never this bold. But something (someone) had filled you with adrenaline and laughter and the best damn tamales you’d ever had in your life until you felt like you could afford to take chances - today and probably every day after that.

“You’re supposed to kiss me now,” you breathed, the heat in your cheeks blooming soft until it flushed your chest and made your breathing shallow.

Javier leaned forward, reaching his arms around the swell of your waist. His nose knocked against yours and you swore you’d never seen anyone look at you the way he did - gentle and reverent and slightly hopeful.

His voice came out hoarse, whispering. “Yes ma’am.”

permanent: @ah-callie @itzagoodthing @spookypym @opheliaelysia @watsonwise @damndamer0n @amarvelousmandalorian @bunnyart-blog @agirllovespasta @pascalispedro @pascalplease @coffeencontemplation @chelsfic @lesqui @javierpenaspinkshirt @symbiont13 @glowingpena @squidlywiddly87 @1zashreena1 @hiscyarika @lostingoogletranslate @keeper0fthestars @bobafvtt @halfwaythereroyal @starwarsiscooliguess @huliabitch @rosetophighlander

idk if i should start a taglist for this bc idk how long it’s gonna be but five bucks says i have no impulse control and turn it into some 20 part behemoth bc i’m a Clown™

part three

#javier peña #javier peña x reader #javier peña fanfiction #javier peña x you #pedro pascal fanfiction #narcos tv show #narcos fanfiction

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m39 · 3 years

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Beyond Canonical Extravaganza - Pre-Hiatus: Chapter 15

Two days ago

I mean, it can’t actually end up that bad, right?

Today

I…

What in the…

There is…

THERE IS NOTHING!!!

Gasps everywhere

I’m serious, there is little to no… ANYTHING that actually moves the story forward! All I can remember is how Dave’s pink clone asked him what will happen when they will all reach Doc Strider. But, if I remember correctly, this kind of talk already happen in the Davekat chapter, and that chapter, just like the one I’m reviewing right now, was a filler.

Is there something… new to talk about? Well… take a look at this:

There they are, officer! THERE THEY ARRRRRREEEEEE!!!

I mean, I’m surprised that Meat!Callie finally made their, sort of, physical appearance. I actually forgot that they were in this rotten comic.

And it is truly a rotten comic since it’s time to talk about… the artwork of this chapter. Everybody already said their piece of their mind about it so I’ll try to keep it short. To put it simply: it’s below average in many places. Say what you want about previous chapters, at least they looked good. This chapter? I-I mean I… Look at this:

LOOK AT THIS SHIT!!! LOOK HOW THEY MASSACRED MY BABY GIRL!!! And that’s not the only picture. No no no! I also have this:

What is this thing next to Dave?! His hand?!? Or his foot-long shlong?!!

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So, yeah, it doesn’t look good. It looks like nobody was overlooking it and/or they hired some newbie to do the job. Or like Caliborn himself actually drew it. After all these months I thought that they fixed the problem and replaced it all with something better, but NOPE.AVI. it seems.

But the artwork isn’t the only problem of this chapter if you haven’t noticed already. Dave feels like he reverted back into being some kind of 90’s kid caricature even bigger than Pink Dave.

Oh yeah, I forgot. His personality now is also nothing but being half of Davekat. Because hey! Who cares about some quality control in this official continuation? In writers’ minds, all that fans care about is Davekat, Davekat, and MORE DAVEKAT! These two don’t need any character development! Just shove them doing UwU UwU kawaii desu! Most of the Twatter will eat it out.

By the way, Dave is now also brain-dead too:

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Yes folks! You see this right. David the walking 90’s stereotype, just called Dirk, his ectobiological father, who’s homosexual… a homophobe.

DIRK!

A HOMOPHOBE!

giggles

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Have I reached Nadir? Is this what a complete shithole looks like? Is there something actually good in this chapter?!

Oh… oh my god… I think I found it… I think I found a golden nugget in the pile of shit! It won’t make this chapter good but at least it’s something.

You know, I almost feel bad for Pink Dave in this chapter. Check it out:

This is a (poorly drawn) face of a man that screams:

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And you know what? That’s probably how I can describe my feelings right now. This chapter is like taking every bad thing from the Cesspool timeline spiced up with bad artwork. Say what you want about the chapters that happened in that timeline, at least there I could, somewhat, see how the story connected to the Cesspool was moving forward. Here, the story just stops dead on-road and refuses to move forward unless you listen to its rambling about meta-narrative or/and Davekat.

My guess on what happens in the Meat timeline when we come back to it will be Dave leaving Jade/Pink Dave/anyone other than Karkat to die because they are not Karkat.

Only one chapter to go and I’ll take a long (hopefully) break from anything related to this comic. Good news – I heard it’s better than this one. Bad news – it takes place in the Cesspool timeline.

sigh

You know what they say: You can’t have everything.

See you next time.

Bye.

#review #homestuck #homestuck 2 #homestuck meat #chapter 15 #dave strider #roxy lalonde #calliope #jade harley #karkat vantas #Beyond Canonical Extravaganza

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ardenttheories · 4 years

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I have a question! if you don’t want to answer it’s okay! so I’ve been on hs twitter recently and I knew about the june discourse but man seeing it up close? absolutely wild. they’ve separated into 2 or 3 groups (junebuggers/hardjuners(like the people who call others transmisogynic for liking John) and johnlikers) anyway the whole point of this is that the junebuggers keep saying june will appear in hs2. I don’t think so and even if she did I don’t trust them to do a good job. what do you think?

I’m admittedly torn on this, because I can genuinely see two outcomes:

- June doesn’t appear in HS^2 at all. We keep waiting and nothing happens, because they decide to pull the rug from under our feet. The writers have actively shown that they hate us, and that they’re not interested in writing something that’s actually good for the fandom. Just not having her show up at all is very likely, and will probably be done out of spite.

- They do have June appear, but they fuck it up like they did with Roxy and Jade. She ends up being a transmisogynistic charicature and isn’t treated as a transwoman so much as she’s treated as a joke. That, or she’s treated as a “well, you got your rep, fuck off now” - or they just don’t write her like a trans woman, and write her like a cis man or cis woman, because apparently the writers don’t know how to write trans people.

Admittedly, I do lean towards the latter. This is the same group of writers who canonised Vriska being trans in Pesterquest, and come from the hard junebugger setting. This is also from the same group of writers who said that June could be a bisexual lesbian, and that Vriska being trans excused all of her abusive behaviours. It’s also from the same group of people who refused to say whether or not Vriska was canonically trans, despite actively shitting on people who didn’t see her that way.

Admittedly a lot of those last parts are Kate-exclusive, but she’s still in touch with the team. Even if she’s not actively writing, I genuinely don’t trust how much influence she might have over the comic - and I definitely don’t trust how often all of them have said that they own Homestuck, and they will make it hell for the fans to read.

My other worry is that it’s treated as a joke or that they brush over June’s transition because they can’t be bothered to figure out how it’d work for an older person to do so. That like, we get a “it’s the Candy timeline! Wacky shit happens all the time!”, and June’s treated as a wacky outcome of the fucked up timeline rather than as a person who genuinely was in a position to think about her identity. Or that like, we’ll get “man in a dress” jokes over June and then no actual talk about her and her validity.

I want her to talk about her identity seriously, maybe with Roxy, and then later see Harry Anderson correcting Vrissy and Tav that they’re talking about his mom, not his dad, and that she’s called June, not John. And then June moves forward and it’s great because it’s actually done well and she’s real and valid and they didn’t make any transmisogynistic jokes out of her.

I just don’t think they’ll actually do that. That’s how little trust I have in them at this point. I genuinely, 100% believe that they will fuck this up. I could be wrong, and I really hope I am! But, yeah. Personally? I think this is going to be a trainwreck, because they don’t have a good track record - with Vriska, with Roxy, with Jade, even with Callie.

They’ve had four goes at this. If fifth time’s the charm, then I want to know why the hell they didn’t do it sooner for the other characters they ruined with horrific, transphobia representation and outright ignorance.

#k8course #homestuck^2 critical #ardenttheories out of theory #nonsensicalruminations

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homestuckexamination · 4 years

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(warning, will contain a homestuck 2 spoiler so be warned anyone who hasnt blacklisted the tag) WAIT THERES A THIRD AXIS FOR CLASSES?? *has a mental breakdown* jeez hmstk2 gets better and better i love this. Anyways, what do you think the outcome of jade vs. dead granny callie? Like what will happen with the peanuts? >.>

Not necessarily a ‘Third Axis’ in its entirety but, definitely some extra angle that isn’t usually considered! This was mentioned when Callie said Witches and Muses are closer than Sylphs and Muses, and we KNOW Witches are Active from Hussie, and then Pip doubly confirmed this, so they basically said “There is something more going on with Classes”, and I, for one, am absolutely looking forward to finding out about it.

Also, there’s no outcome to be decided. It has already been decided. Look at the panels again. Jade did not eat the Reeses. Calliope didn’t dare to bet, she let her go. She’s freeeeeeeeee~.

#Class #Aspect #HSE #HS^2 #Homestuck^2 #Jade #Calliope #Canon #Fanon

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arsnovacadenza · 4 years

Text

Day 10- Une journée des plus joyeuses

Characters: Napoleon & Jean

Pairings : Jean x Napoleon gen/pre-slash

Ao3 Link : Here

“You can’t just sneak out on your own birthday party!”

“Oi Jean, let's try riding out to the ocean."

The quiet man turned towards his companion. "What? Why?"

"Because it's my birthday and I’m free to do whatever I want."

The fields were quiet that day as they let their horses feed on the grass. Both men stayed on their steeds, relishing the sunlight. Napoleon, in particular, seemed to enjoy the spring breeze.

So he remembered. "Right this instant?"

"Of course not, silly. It was just something that crossed my mind," Napoleon chuckled. "But it's better than just loitering around while our friends at the mansion prepare for the party, don’t you think?”

"What party?" Jean feigned ignorance. Bless the heavens for gracing him with a natural poker face.

"My surprise party," the birthday boy deadpanned. "Is that not why you've taken me out this far?"

"I can't confirm nor deny that statement."

Ange whinnied, and Napoleon gently patted her neck.

"I see nothing wrong with wanting to go out and having a little change of pace."

Napoleon laughed. "I was surprised when you said you wanted to have me for an entire day. Usually, it's always me asking you out and never the other way around." He smiled wryly. "For goodness' sake, Jean. You should be a little more selfish with me."

Jean looked away, attempting to prevent Napoleon from seeing his blush. "How did you find out?"

Napoleon steered his horse closer towards the embarrassed beauty. "Your best friend's amoureuse is so predictable it's endearing." He chuckled. "The way she flinches and stammers whenever I'm around— Not only her but Sebastian and the others have been acting strangely.”

“Besides, it's not like I don't remember my own birthday. Put two-to-two together, and I deduced that all of you were conspiring to do something on my birthday. Am I right?"

Jean, the innocent that he was, couldn't help but blurt the entire scheme.

"It wasn't Yukari's idea but Isaac's. Your friend told Sebastian, who then relayed it to Yukari. Naturally, the girl was excited and invited everybody else to join in the plot," He shied away from Napoleon's scrutinizing gaze. "Wait. Don't tell them that I told you."

But the former emperor just laughed and reached out to ruffle Jean's hair.

"Cut it out." The miffed soldier batted away the offending hand. But Napoleon refused to stop, making a mess out of his impeccably neat hair. Eventually, the former emperor drew back and laughed at him.

"Sure, I'll cover for you." He grinned impishly. "But you'll have to do me a favor."

Jean rearranged his hair with irritation. Napoleon's smirk unnerved him, but he realized that it was his birthday.

"Fine," he huffed. "What can I do for you?"

Napoleon's smile changed to a more relaxed one. "Let me pamper you for an entire day."

Jean couldn't believe what he just heard. What man would celebrate his birthday by spoiling another man?

Then again, Jean couldn't remember the last time somebody gave their entire schedule for him along with their attention. Napoleon's offer was tempting, and he was secretly curious to see where the deal would lead him. "I accept."

Napoleon's jade eyes glinted warmly, and the sight compelled Jean to make a run for the hills and drown himself in a lake somewhere and never resurface in front of the man.

Or have it etched onto his memory forever like the 'photo' things that Theo and Leonardo rambled about. These peculiar, emerging notions were confusing, Jean thought.

He despised Napoleon's ability to enthrall him and whoever was in the former emperor's vicinity.

"I’ll accompany you even if you want to walk aimlessly around Paris”. Napoleon’s voice interrupted his reverie. "But no going to your weapons shop or meeting my students in town. I already told them today is a free day."

Jean stared at Napoleon's exuberant demeanor. If it were up to him, Jean would let the man take him to wherever he pleased.

Every foray was an adventure if you went with Napoleon Bonaparte.

"No answer?" Napoleon directed Ange away from Jean's horse. "Then, I'm going to leave you here and go to sea.”

Immediately, Jean pulled up and tugged at the man's garish cape.

"Since it's your birthday," Jean whispered. "You should give me a tour of your previous haunts in Paris."

He let go of the garment as the man flashed his notoriously alluring smile.

"Alright. Where would you like to go?" Napoleon asked as they drove their horses away from the field. "I bet you'll love it if I show you around the École Militaire where I studied, but they would kick us off the premises."

"I don't know. You take me." Jeanne stared at his horse's midnight-black mane as he fought against an odd feeling of inhibition.

"Well," Napoleon pondered. "We can go to the Tuileries Gardens. It's adjacent to the palace where I used to live."

"Maybe," his tone was wistful. "Maybe we can even get a glimpse of my nephew while we're at it."

What's a nephew of yours doing in a garden? "Lead the way, then."

The air was pleasant as the two horsemen made their way towards the bustling city.

Made for Day 10 of Napoleon Birthday Prompt 2020 by @kissmetwicekissmedeadly.

I still need to upload the fic for Day 7, which will be a big one since it’s part of my Jean & Napoleon Tour de France lore with Wellington and Vlad’s faction. Then I'm gonna take a break from Tumblr and writing since I need to take care of other things.

@kisara-16, @thedollarstoresatan, @delicateikemenmemes, @lulu-the-hedgehog, @ikesensrandomninjagirl24, @longingkisses, @weird-profiterole, @napoleonstan, @scummy-writes, @an-otome-cally-correct, @nafeary, @ashavazesa, @hokkaido-fox, @orangenji @thesirenwashere

Joyeux anniversaire, Napoleon!

#ikemen vampire #ikevam fic #ikevam napoleon #ikevam jean #ikevam napoleon bonaparte #riri tries ikevam

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dahniwitchoflight · 4 years

Text

Homesquared Chapter 3

So i have seen smidgens of this on tumblr but just havent had time to do anything about it

and jesus christ Callie Jade is so horrifyingly creepy, and you know the things she’s narrating the characters can also hear which is also hilarious, it just reminds me of that comic about how “yeah sure there’s a giant ominous red floating eyeball in your kitchen, constantly staring, constantly judging, but can you be sure that’s a bad thing?”

and then someone tries to talk to it, but it doesn’t answer and the person goes “fine be an asshole i dont give a fuck”

thats exactly the dynamic happening with Callie Jade right now

Grumpy DaveKat is hilarious

and Hey! we finally get to see how people look, I really dig Roxy’s look

“ROXY: dude doesnt "believe" in "substances"”

This line from Roxy makes sense, as a person wholly ensconced in the idea of their own self and always being in control of themselves and their own mind and faculties they would hate anything at all that causes that iron mental grip to slip

That’s probably why Dirk avoided sleep even when his dreamself was awake, even sleeping and dreaming was considered a form of himself losing control over himself that he couldn’t integrate the idea himself and his dreamself were the same person rather than two identical people and also I remember that the Jujupop didn’t affect him either

Later on Dirk in the narrative will say something about his own trauma, but not really go into what it is, but if I had to hazard a guess (and really it’s not much of a guess at this point)

Dirk probably has memories of a version of himself being under the mental influence of another, Lil Cal, LE, Doc Scratch etc what have you, So Narrative Dirk may actually be a version of Dirk who’s not quite yet poisoned into being a version of those 3, but his words also hinted that just because he’s aware of a certain way that he’s acting doesn’t make him more likely to stop it

Like he’s equating that you can be aware of the influence something else is having on you and in the exact ways it is influencing you without being able to stop, the exact thing he is traumatized and afraid of being most likely

So his one driving fear, is he does not want to lose control of his own soul, his own being, his own way of life and existing, to something else, something other. Even though he most likely is fully aware of the things and mannerisms of the other that have slipped into himself? Like he’s probably fully aware of the similarities between himself and those mentioned above, but maybe the thing that he’s hinging on is that instead of those guys poisoning him into being like them, instead perhaps he can convince himself that it’s his own self influencing others to act like himself instead. His influence reaching out and expanding instead of shrinking as he fears it

Anyway, Dave and Kanaya have a cute moment, I really like that

We get a nice shot of them in shadows against a backdrop of stars and Kanaya starts talking about a story Rose would once tell so that’s story is already gonna be dripping in metaphorical potential

“ A Wriggler Story About A Young Prince And The Beloved Flower He Loved And Lost”

Though that’s a story I’m actually familiar with

KANAYA: A Singular Wild Rose He Failed To Cherish When He Had Her

KANAYA: And His Journey Of Discovering What She Meant To Him All Along

KANAYA: Culminating In A New Quest To Find Her And Win Her Back

KANAYA: The Story Comments On The Nature Of Friendship

KANAYA: And Of Course In Turn Love

KANAYA: How Once They Connect There Is No Distance Or Circumstance That Can Seperate Them

KANAYA: How The Worlds In Each Ones Mind Take On Contours Shaped By Their Memories Of The Other

KANAYA: Places And Moments And Orbiting Passersby Becoming More and More Entangled In The Context Of Their Mutual Affections

KANAYA: Such As With A Garden Calling To Mind An Engagement Once Declared There

KANAYA: Or Something To That Fucking Effect

So obviously Dirk and Rose

Dirk has Rose with him, discovers an actual genuine connection with her, likely because he already viewed her as an equal, despite his manipulations of her, and chapter 4 spoilers but he genuinely wants to play a game with her when there really isn’t any reason for it, so he is actually curious to see who comes out on top of it, Him or Her, so Dirk is probably in some way desperate to have an actual equal partner in some way instead of drowning in himself all the time, not surprising. But Rose, obviously, will leave and reject him, likely when the manipulation comes around and is revealed/Kanaya and all them reach her/that part of the story

But then the story tinges onto a romantic nature and is framing Dirk trying to get her back as a romantic quest to save his partner/friend something something love and friendship, “no distance can separate them” yeah that doesn’t sound like obsession with the first person you’ve ever truly seen as an equal/a real person,

yeah “A Garden calling to Mind an engagement once declared there” definitely sounds like the garden of eden/adam and eve paradise fantasy that Dirk has been trying for some reason, to setup on the new planet

Really begs the question for why Dirk cares at all to do all of this? Except we now the answer is already its not the thing itself he cares about, its the value hes putting into the story as something that generates interest in the audience

He doesn’t care about actually making a society or being gods or whatever, he just knows thats what the audience wants to see and cares about so therefore he does it

and the reason he does all of THAT is because is ties into his trauma of his sense of self eroding away becoming a person he’s unfamiliar with

I wonder how he’s going to handle how much he’s going to change in order to fit the role of the story he’s writing when all is said and done

the Dirk at the end of this is going to be very different than the Dirk that started in Homestuck, despite all of his fears and intentions, and that he could not say all of it wasnt his own doing because of the iron control he made sure to have from the very beginning, I honestly think that will be kind of a shock for him if a meeting like that ever one day happened

Specifically for the fact that he seems to be aware of the romantic in nature tropes hes writing himself and Rose into and for now still seems to be avoiding them, not having gone that far, but, well

Maybe this is where we’ll start to see where Doc Scratch’s odd tendencies starting coming from

You know he was always really weird with Rose and Vriska (Maybe because he sees Light players all as extensions of Rose herself?)

Anyway yeah this is def the story metaphor I think we’re going to see in this, but Kanaya doesn’t fully get it, she thinks the story refers to herself and Rose

DAVE: that seems kind of wack for a kids story

KANAYA: Its Possible I Am Projecting Slightly In This Specific Circumstances

KANAYA: It Was Just A Metaphor

KANAYA: But In A Way I Feel As If It Is the Greater Universe Trying To Tell Me Something

KANAYA: It May Simply Stem From My Longing To See Her Again And How Much Is Indicative Of Something More Sinister

Which is cool because it makes this opposing connection between Dirk and Kanaya as opposites, which I like because it solidifies a tiny bit more the idea of Sylph being Passive Create to A Prince’s Active destroy.

Oh yeah, there was a tiny hint of Mind metaphor as well, can’t forget Terezi is with them

KANAYA: How The Worlds In Each Ones Mind Take On Contours Shaped By Their Memories Of The Other

KANAYA: Places And Moments And Orbiting Passersby Becoming More and More Entangled In The Context Of Their Mutual Affections

KANAYA: Such As With A Garden Calling To Mind An Engagement Once Declared There

Basically the idea that your experiences of a person and your memories of them shape who they become as well, the boundary between you and I is controlled by both of us, so each has an effect of the personality Heart of the other through our own decisions and Mind

like the way people tend to mimic those they like and want to be close to, or the way they actively try to distance themselves and what they are like from those they hate

But that at all seems to be more about Mind in general than referring to anything specifically Terezi

though it is exactly that understanding of Mind versus Heart and how one affects the other that could make Dirk realize that in the question of the self he’s only had half the picture the whole time, he’s only had the understanding of Heart and has thus far not been able to understand how Mind plays a role in the sustaining of the self, how what other people do to help you to be you, which is his entire philosophical conundrum

“DAVE: the dude youve spent the last 7 years convincing yourself isnt an egomaniacal anime villain

DAVE: and who isnt actually lying in wait to completely decimate your life and your emotions and shit“

oh, that makes me sad, this is def bringing up some bad trains of thought for Dave ):

“ KARKAT: KANAYA BARELY EVEN TALKS, CALLIOPE WON’T LEAVE THEIR CABIN, JADE JUST FLOATS AROUND LIKE A CREEPY BALLOON THAT’S MOSTLY MADE OF HAIR.

OH RIGHT, I forgot Calliope is actually WITH them on their journey, despite seeming to want absolutely fuck all with Jade Callie, I totally thought she was gonna stay back on Earth C but I guess not!

It’s so odd to see them so terrified of their alternate self like this when they’ve interacted mildly before. I still don’t know what to think of that much, other than they seem to be doing that weird thing that the other kids went through, like how John scribbled clowns on the walls unknown to himself for the longest time due to Gamzee’s unseen mental influence

that’s exactly the type of shit Dirk would be afraid of, so I wonder if that’s what Callie was afraid of as well? Maybe its Jade Callie that’s influencing them this way not Gamzee, to scribble strange things on the walls and not come out, but it’s the same fear of the other regardless manifesting and changing the self.

It is a very oddly non social thing for Our Calliope to do, when the point of different between the two Callie’s was how social Calliope was versus how antisocial Jade Callie is. Worries me ): but at least they’re here I guess

KARKAT: SOMETIMES IT ALMOST FEELS LIKE WHATEVER SLATHERING MONSTROSITY OF A COSMIC HELLBEAST THAT PUT ALL THIS SHIT INTO MOTION...ACTUALLY LIKES ME?

ROXY: fucked up if tru

Karkat is really popular as a character in the fandom lol

and that’s that one, time to get to Chapter 4, which has a lot more juicy exposition

With all the Garden of Eden metaphors though I can’t help but think of the Apple of the Garden of Eden when I think of “story exposition” now

The juicy tantalizing forbidden red fruit that when you bit into it you suddenly understand and know things you did not before and you’re eyes are opened, I wonder if that’s enough to just make Apples a solid Symbol of Light in Homestuck’s context? Most of it’s association with knowledge is external to Homestuck, just referenced symbolically, it’s not actually used in any cirumstances pertaining to knowledge, but more as the metaphor of it being the gate to leave the garden of eden, more like a teleporter, Rapture and Revelation in general rather than just Knowledge itself

aka my new headcanon is that one thing needed to Alchemize a Transportalizer is inexplicably going to be an Apple, if that ever comes up at all

#Homesquared #Homestuck^2 #Dirk Strider #Rose Lalonde #Terezi Pyrope #Apples are the essence of Portal Technology #long post

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wakraya · 4 years

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I feel like in the next update, barring a full yiffy reveal or meat interlude, the writers need to show their hand so to speak. We need something to keep candy from just being filler besides an eventual june. We need something to keep the useless drama from feeling like useless drama. There has to be a reason yiffy exists, an end goal as to why things play out the way they do. 1/

When drama isnt for character development, as nothing changes between rosemary's relationship, the drama has to be for some plot reason. I feel like yiffy would have landed better if candy alt callie was like "yeah i wrote yiffy in so we can have 4 kids to play sburb before dirk does so we can establish canonicity in this timeline". Something to give a substantial goal in candy and care about the drama happening within. 2/2

A fair request! Drama can have a reason without going all the way back to playing SBURB though, and I'd argue that, while we've only seen the beginning of this, I think the drama in itself did something already. Jade's breakdown painted her relationship with Dave very differently, and there's something to be said about Kanaya's strength of character and understanding in a situation like this, not unlike her refusal to even consider breaking up with Drunk Rose.

That said, Candy ISN'T filler? The Omega kids, the fighting back against Jane, not even from a Meta perspective of "oh I like the concept of how Absurd and Tropey Candy is" I think fighting back against Jane's regime and winning the revolution is a good storyline on its own that I want to see play out! Subjective opinion, I know, but it's not just useless filler. I mean, Vriska is there, after all. :::;)

#homestuck #homestuck^2 #hs^2 #spoilers #yiffany

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thewebcomicsreview · 4 years

Photo

Homestuck 2 updated! I had a jokey preamble about how life was depressing right now so let’s read a depressing webcomic, but it just made me sad. As always, mute “Homestuck 2 Liveblog” if you don’t like it. As never before, I’m going to put the rest under a read more so as not to put a really long post on everyone’s dash.

I realize we’re supposed to be going “Hmm Calliope is starting to sound very Dirk-like” but if this is the third chapter in a row of philosturbation I’m going to stay in my room and not do anything because I’m socially distancing.

1. If we’re supposed to be thinking Calliope is like Dirk is like Lord English, you totally missed a chance to do the no/yes/no/yes thing just now

2. JADE IS AWAKE

3. Holy fuck, is Jade awake and not in charge of her own body this whole time? That’s kind of fucked.

I missed Jade. I’m hardly the first to notice this, but Homestuck’s girl characters are generally better written and more interesting than the boys, which is why it’s so weird that the epilogues completely sidelined all of them.

youtube

Being a space player sucks, just in general. Also, it occurs to me that for all the pop culture subtext of Homestuck I don’t think much was made of Jade literally being a princess stuck in a tower.

That looks an awful lot like a bottle of Sunny D, which does not have pulp. If that’s an intentional reference to Wayward Vagabond’s love of the sugar in cans of sugar-free Tab, that’s a clever little detail.

Fucking finally, someone’s asking about the actual mechanics of this “narrative” ability.

Put those down, Jade, she’s literally possessing your body without your consent.

Also, is your “huge consciousness” supposed to be an allusion to your pet dog’s penis that’s been fused to your body? I was kind of hoping that was one of those things that’d be quietly dropped.

Technically you’re the one who wrote that plot point Calliope, but I suppose we’ve all written weird shit we’ve come to regret sometimes, like how the latest page of Saffron and Sage implies Liri has a clown fetish. That’s canon now, and we’re all stuck with it.

Oh, wow, we’re getting into Classpects now, and I think Calliope is perhaps misdiagnosing Jade. Calliope is a Muse of Space, the most passive class in the game, but Jade is a Witch, one of the most active. And while Jade is often shunted into a passive role, it’s never been something she’s actually wanted to do. In fact, she beat the shit out of her own dreamself for being a wuss.

So, we’re going there then. Calliope is controlling Jade’s body without her consent, and when pushed on it is literally saying it’s okay because Jade’s a slut. We’re breaching from subtext into text now.

Fucking finally! It’s nearly eight years since Jade got to do anything cool, and she’s making up for lost time. Because it there’s one thing that’s been very consistent about Homestuck this whole time

It’s that Harleyberts will beat the living shit out of you if you try them, no matter how powerful you are.

It took me a second to get this, but what’s happening here is that Jade is partially regaining control of her body, and is threatening to eat a Reese’s is Calliope doesn’t leave her body. A Reese’s is, of course, peanut butter and chocolate, and Jade is both allergic to peanuts and a dog, so it’s like double-poison. That’s honestly kind of great.

Unfortunately, as Calliope points out, she’s also immortal, and would simply revive.

Jade is winning a lot of points here both by being a scary badass and by being the only character in the epilogues or Homestuck 2 to stop being meta about the plot and actually remember what the plot is. I think this is the first time in the entire Homestuck EU that someone actually remembered the Alpha Timeline. Also, it’s interesting that Calliope apparently doesn’t know how it’s decided if a death is “Heroic” or “Just” for the purposes of god tiers. That’s a fairly large gap in her knowledge, but this version of Calliope never really interacted with the humans like the “main” one did.

Oh my, I didn’t think Homestuck 2 was doing these. I do remember they said no big animations because they couldn’t afford the animation time at a fair rate, so let’s not get too hype here.

Ah, it’s just the ticking of Jade’s clock, about to decide if her killing herself via Reese’s Pieces is Heroic, Just, or Dumb. Still neat, though, and nice that we’re dipping our toes in the [s] lake.

It worked, though! Calliope didn’t want to risk it, so Jade is back in control of her body, and everything is immediately better forever, and Jade now, for the first time since Act 5, can contribute to the story of her own free will.

Get fucked, Callie.

#Homestuck 2 #Homestuck 2 Liveblog #Shrek #I still think the Vrissy stuff was the best chapter of Homestuck 2 #But this one's really good #I really did miss Jade

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mmmmalo · 4 years

Note

okay, so this has been bothering me. I know aradias outfit in HS2 is meant to relate to the cherubs, clearly, but for some reason I feel like her outfit is a call back to andrews jigsaw thread, (which I think caliborn is also based off that thread but thats another topic), and i have no ieda what its meant to mean if anything at all?

The cherubs themselves are, like you said, a big Jigsaw reference, between the bowtie and the being glassy eyed puppet people with swirly cheeks and the wanting to play a game. Aradia considers herself Calliope's acolyte and is therefore adopting those motifs I believe?

One interesting new trend for Aradia is that she is reading the narration (or listening to it, since alt-Callie is in the room?) and responding to it, sometimes by repeating it verbatim as though Callie were speaking through her instead of Jade (or like Aradia's being a teacher's pet), other times frowning when Callie says something mean in her authoritative narration voice (like calling Aradia annoying).

#hs^2 #aradia: i want to play a game 0u0 its fruit ninja

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nadja-antipaxos · 1 year

Text

ALL MY PICTURES OF YOU - PART ONE

previously - masterlist || next - part two

Title: If only I’d thought of the right words, I wouldn’t be breaking apart

Rating: Teen

Warnings: some swearing and mentions of sex, but nothing explicit, pregnancy, brief mention of infertility, eventual character death cause it's in the movie

Word Count: 6,640

Exhausted, everyone shuffles into the house. Podcast and Lucky are picked up by their parents who were overwhelmed by the sudden ghosts in town. Gary stays but sits next to Phoebe, so he’s not crowding her mother. Callie finds some hot chocolate mix and booze to dole out in an age-appropriate fashion for this little Ghostbusters reunion. It’s when they’re all sitting at the table that Callie actually really looks at them.

“You look familiar.” She takes a sip and tries to remember where she could’ve seen them. Her childhood memories are too fuzzy. She spent such a long time trying to forget her father she forgot everyone who wasn’t her mother.

“We were at your mother’s—Jade’s funeral,” Winston explains.

Callie remembers talking to him. He gave her a card and some flowers. He was very kind on the worst day of her life.

“I didn’t stay long—couldn’t.” Ray sighs.

“My wife, Dana, talked to you. Tall, redhead. Gorgeous.” Peter can’t help but smile.

“Oh. Yeah. She said she was friends with my mom in New York.” Callie takes another sip.

“We all were.” Winston nods. “We loved Jade.”

“So, you knew—Egon—when he was with my mom?” She raises her eyebrows.

“Know ‘em? We were witnesses at the courthouse.” Ray laughs.

“No big wedding?” Callie asks.

“Your grandmother—Jade’s mom—wanted one. It wasn’t really their style. They settled for that reception at the Waldorf.”

“That was a fun night.” Winston grins.

“Nobody made Spengs smile like Jadie.” Ray looks at his mug.

“Nobody but Jade.” Peter corrects with a raised eyebrow.

“He smiled!” Ray pipes up, defensive.

“Barely.” Peter rolls his eyes.

“Remember when that photographer woke Callie up in her stroller?” Winston skillfully changes the subject.

“Yeah, Jade nearly got arrested for destroying that camera.” Peter snorts.

“That sounds like Grandma” Phoebe nods with a small smile.

“Definitely.” Trevor grins. “She told me the best way to deal with a bully was to break their nose.”

“She was a special lady. “ Ray sighs.

“She sure was.” Winston looks from the kids to his former Ghostbusters. “Remember when she attacked Walter Peck with that hair clip?”

“Shouldn’t have called Egon a ‘bug-eyed nut’.” Ray raises his eyebrows.

“Tiniest woman I knew that could kick everyone’s ass.” Peter smiles.

Trevor and Phoebe nod in agreement. It had been 3 years and they still missed her terribly even more than their dad because she never meant to leave.

“Why couldn’t he tell her the truth? She was always willing to listen. Hell, when I found out I was having Trevor, the first thing she said was ‘This would’ve never happened if you’d been gay.’ He should’ve said something.” She tries to hide the anger in her voice. If her mom had known the stakes. If he had taken the time to explain it. Things could’ve been so different. Winston’s large black hand over her small white one pulls her from her thoughts. His eyes stare into hers.

“Because your mama would’ve gone after Gozer with her bare hands. I think he’d rather she hate him than keep her and lose her.”

“I wish she knew why he did it. To save everyone.” Callie bites her lip.

“Maybe she knows now,” Gary speaks up. She had almost forgotten he was there.

“Did she know about this charming fixer-upper?” Peter asks, looking around the cluttered farmhouse.

“Yeah. I remember she got a bill once and forwarded it to him. I was so mad she knew where he was and didn’t give him a piece of her mind.”

“What did she say?” Ray asks.

“She wasn’t gonna chase after someone who left. She had other ways to spend her time.”

“You were always her number one priority.” Ray looks into her eyes and Callie notices they’re different colors. It’s charming. “Until your kids came along. She sent me a Christmas card every year.”

Callie laughs. Her mom always chose the silliest photo for Christmas. The idea of dressing in the same outfit and posing creeped her out. She’d rather send one out where they were all piled on the couch. She was unabashedly authentic like that.

The dusty old farmhouse has enough room for everyone who isn’t a Spengler to stay the night. They’re exhausted enough and Callie doesn’t even want to look up the drive from New York City to Summerville. She tries to sleep. She does. She closes her eyes. She takes deep breaths. She stares at the ceiling. Finally, she gets up. She pads down the stairs to the living room and finds a box labeled “Mom’s”.

Her mom was so organized she had all of her journals labeled by year. Callie grabs the ones from ’84-90 and ’90-93. She couldn’t bear to read these after she died, but now, in the middle of the night after seeing the ghost form of her dad, she needs her mom too.

Dear Diary,

Dana wants to set me up with one of Peter’s friends. Those guys that got fired for being nuts and then saved the city from a giant marshmallow man. Ghostbusters. Yes, this is a sentence I am writing truthfully in the year 1984. She promises he’s nothing like Peter who is hilarious but I would never have the patience for him as a partner. I heard enough about Venkman at school and we’re not even in the same field.

Dana throws the party in her new building. She couldn’t stay in the old one after the whole portal to the supernatural thing. I’m polite to Peter because he’s always been nice to me and until he hurts my dear friend, we’re on good terms. I meet Ray Stantz. I meet Winston Zeddemore. Both pleasant and charming and taken. Ray is seeing someone and Winston has a wife, Annie, who is gorgeous.

One Ghostbuster. Two Ghostbuster. Three Ghostbuster. No four.

The party is fun. To stand out from the boring housewarming gifts, I give Dana a fire extinguisher and the painting she’s been eyeing at the studio. She offers to pay and I refuse because at least I know it’s going to someone who enjoys it. The party ends as it began with only three Ghostbusters. Whatever. I’m sure Egon Spengler is probably weird and I have shit to do.

Dear Diary,

I cannot believe I am writing these words: there is a ghost in my art studio. It started with paint cans getting knocked over. Then tarps went missing. Paintbrushes would reappear on light fixtures. One night I swear I heard something playing Harry Belafonte on the paint cans. Okay, so I have an invisible guest. For what I’m paying for this space, I can be welcoming. Until it tried to push an easel onto me and then smother me with a tarp. Not fucking cool.

Peter arrives with the mysterious Egon Spengler who runs tests on the studio and all my supplies. I do not know how he is friends with a walking pickup line like Peter. This guy is all business. He only talks to me when he needs to ask a question or give me directions for his tests. It’s a fucking shame because he has the deep baritone of a phone sex operator. Like Peter, he’s a foot taller than me and has to bend down or have me sit. He has dark eyes hidden behind rounded glasses. His hair is dark brown and perfectly coiffed. It looks thick and soft even with whatever product is in it. Okay, maybe Dana knows me after all because I’m intrigued.

He concludes that the space is in indeed full of ghost energy and I follow willingly back to their firehouse turned office and let him hook me up to all sorts of equipment I’m pretty sure he made himself. He studies—actually studies—my face when he asks questions. I’ve never been studied before. He says he’s going to research the history behind the studio with Ray and that they would like to do an overnight to observe. I agree under the condition that I stay with them. Dana’s beau or not, it’s my studio and I’m not leaving it alone to brief acquaintances.

It’s just me and Dr. Spengler. And the man is a professional. Ray is researching my building. Peter? I don’t even know anymore. Winston has the night off. So I go about my routine. I’ve been working on this big canvas lately, so I get on my ladder. Done this so many times. It’s a good ladder. It’s stable. I’m fine. Out of nowhere, it starts to wobble. I hear it crash to the floor but I’m not with it. I look down and see two big hands holding my waist. Egon has me in his arms off the ground. He moves like a cat. I didn’t even hear him. He clears his throat and sets me back down. I say thank you because I’m polite and glad I didn’t smash my face into the floor. He nods.

Ray comes barging back in with all sorts of information about how my studio used to be a famous cathouse. That’s his word. I could’ve done with whorehouse, but he’s being historical. The man who owned it hated women (big shocker) and Ray believes my presence is causing him to act up. I guess he can’t handle an independent woman. Spengler asks me what I was doing when I was attacked by the tarp. I was on the phone with the landlord arguing about fixing a drafty window. He thinks that because I was standing up for myself against a man, it angered this asshole ghost.

They enlist Peter to stage an argument with me. It feels silly at first but then Peter mentions the ERA and we have an actual argument. He’s all for it but he doesn’t know why it has to be an amendment. I’m pulled back by my hair and Ray shouts that he can see the ghost in whatever visor he has on. I feel a hold around my throat and I’m not a fan of this. I’m clawing at whatever I can and suddenly I’m let go. I land on the floor but get to brace myself a little. I see this grey, translucent figure with a very dark mustache being lassoed between Ray and Spengler’s…ghost guns? They pull it into something they call a trap and lots of smoke fills my studio. The ladder is singed and they’ve scorched some of the tarps, but it’s better than being choked. Ray sprays it down with the fire extinguisher before any paint catches on fire.

To my surprise, Spengler comes to check on me first. He helps me up and inspects the bruises on my throat. He frowns and suggests I go back to the firehouse for him to take a proper look at me. I agree. He delicately applies a salve on my throat keeping those dark eyes on me to gauge my reaction. It makes me feel bad that I nearly spit water in his face when he tells me the bill will be $2000. I argue him down to $1500 and we settle on $1750 since I was indeed attacked for the sake of bait.

I ask about paying tomorrow because I’m exhausted and it’s 2 am. Ray offers his bed because apparently there are rooms upstairs for sleeping. I try to convince him to let me go home, but Spengler suggests I stay in case there are any complications from ghost choking. I camp out on a couch they have upstairs and drift off to sleep. I don’t remember anyone placing a pillow under my head or a blanket on me, but I’m grateful when I wake up and realize it.

In the morning, I’m able to go back to my apartment to shower, eat, and write a check. Thankfully, I have many tasteful scarves to cover my neck. When I come back, I hand the payment to Janine (their very cute secretary with killer fashion sense). I ask if they’re all out and she tells me Spengler’s in his lab. Of course, I want to see him again but I’m not gonna invade his space. I’m at the door when he comes up from the basement and asks how I’m feeling. He’s definitely not the social one but he’s trying. His concern seems genuine and I can’t help but think about how quickly he picked me up from that ladder. He asks about my neck and I show him. He beckons me down into the basement to give me some of that salve he made.

Now that I’m no longer a client and just a curious acquaintance, I actually take a look around. He has a workbench and soldering equipment. There are all sorts of junk food. Cheese Its. Twinkies. Crunch bars. Microscopes. No acid or bubbling formulas. I don’t see any reanimated corpses but I do see an alarming amount of mushrooms and other fungi. I wanna put this man in a jar and study him. He explains his hobby and all I can think to ask is if he’s ever gotten high on any of them. He hasn’t, but he doesn’t seem opposed or offended that I asked. I can’t help myself and suggest it. He decides to make it into a tea and away we go.

I’ve tried mushrooms before and these aren’t very strong. No fun trips or hallucinations. I’d give anything to know how much he regrets letting me talk him into this. Instead, he jots down some notes in his book, asks me how I feel, and writes down my answer too.

He just keeps those dark eyes on me and comments on how large my eyes are. I don’t know what that means. I know I have big brown eyes. But they’re just there. He isn’t being mean. I can tell. He’s just observing. He holds in his breath and looks me over again and says clear as day: They’re captivating.

I take the leap and ask him if he wants to go to dinner with me this week. He suggests Thursday. HOUSTON, WE HAVE A DATE!

Dear Diary,

This man is something else. I pick one of my simplest blue dresses because I have no idea what we’re doing. He takes me to a nice, but not a too nice place for dinner. We make modest conversation. I can tell he’s nervous and doesn’t do this dating thing often. I throw him a bone and tell him I haven’t been on a real date since I finished my master’s program. With the Ph.D. program looming ahead, I don’t see much of social life. He tells me that he had a brief thing with Janine, the lovely receptionist, but he might’ve been a little too quiet for someone as bold as her. They work better as friends. I just don’t date. I’ve always loved art more than any person. He apologizes because he doesn’t know much about art and I don’t know much about…ghosts? I make a deal that I can tell him if he tells me and then we’ll both know. A strong eyebrow quirks at that and I think that means he likes it. His eyes light up over the dessert menu and I smile because someone has a sweet tooth.

My usual radar is off. It’s broken around him and that’s kind of exhilarating. He asks me to take a walk with him and begins to explain the different haunted spots in the city. He’s much smarter than me in the traditional sense. My mom would’ve loved it if I was good at math and science. He gets very focused on a certain topic and honestly, I could listen to him all night. I feel a little like Sally in Peanuts trailing after Linus. I’ve never felt so affected by someone. I don’t even notice the bike messenger, but for the second time he picks me up out of harm’s way. To my surprise, he curses at the bike messenger who stops. Spengler straightens up and when the guy realizes how tall he is, he mumbles an apology and leaves. HA! Spengler checks me over and I’m absolutely fine. His big warm hands are on my shoulders and I know I’m smiling like an idiot up at him. He’s staring right back. I wonder if I should ask if I can kiss him, but I don’t. It’s a first for me. Instead, he tells me I have perfect teeth and raises his eyebrows when I tell him it’s because my dad is a dentist. He asks if he can hold my hand as he walks me home. I’m a goner.

Dear Diary,

Can you like someone too much? I really am Sally running after Linus. I swear little cartoon hearts could float around me every time he talks. What the hell is this feeling? I just adore being around him. He asked me to call him that when we talked after the date. He kissed me on our second date at a museum. I could’ve melted into the floor. I swear an orchestra was playing. The first kiss was very sweet. Picture perfect.

I, Jade Margolis, have never felt this way in my entire life. All the other times it was just sex. I can’t stop thinking about him. His nose. His eyes. His neck. His giant brilliant brain. His hands. Not only is he smart but he’s funny too. Not in the way Peter is funny. Egon is very dry. Yes, he’s Egon now. We don’t get many formal dates because we’re both adults and people have ghost problems at any hour of the night. Instead, we just kind of fit into each other’s busy schedules. We get dinner while working. I often bring my coursework over to the firehouse to work on in his lab. The fact I have a free pass is a big deal according to Janine and Winston. He does not like people in there especially when he’s working and he’s always working. But now if he can hear me talking from down there and I don’t greet him after ten minutes, he will get impatient and march up the stairs.

Sometimes, we catch a movie. Other times, he just wants to listen to me talk about my art history classes. It’s like I’m Dorothy in technicolor and didn’t even know I was in black and white before. THIS MAN!! I feel like a schoolgirl. The man keeps insane hours so I’ve fallen asleep in that lab. I told him I was going to start heading back earlier and the next day there was a couch. A comfortable and simple couch. Just for me to be with him. Now, I wake up with his lab coat draped over me. It smells just like him.

I know he’s weird and strange but I adore it because I’m not normal either. I mean, I knitted myself a skeleton sweater that I will wear all year round. He complimented my craftsmanship and accuracy.

I have never wanted to fuck someone so badly in my entire life. I’m dying to know if sex with such a meticulous scientist is going to be super clinical. Will he name my anatomy as he licks it?

“Jesus, Mom.” Callie puts down the journal and grimaces. Her mom had never talked like that to her. She really hopes she isn’t about to be scarred for life as she turns the page to the next passage.

Dear Diary,

The universe is against me having sex with Egon Spengler. And I have tried. We’ve made out dozens of times and he is an amazing kisser. He must take mental notes because each time gets better. I swear he knows how good he is cause I felt him smirking. My mad scientist. We only rounded two bases and god, I want a home run. Every time something happens. Someone needs his help. Something breaks. They have a call. I swear there are ER doctors getting more action than we are.

Tonight, he had me pinned on one of the work tables when that fucking alarm went off. He ignored it and kept kissing me senseless. Peter called his name at the top of the stairs. He actually growled when Peter threatened to come down there. At least he’s as sexually frustrated as I am.

Callie sighs. It isn’t as bad as she thought. She just hopes there’s no details.

Dear Diary or Should I Say Playgirl,

I am ruined. This man has ruined me. I was up late studying when he came to my apartment. He had finished a bust and wanted to see me. No, he said he needed to see me. He was still in that jumpsuit when he kissed me. He picked me up like I was nothing and carried me to my bedroom. It was fantastic. Absolutely fucking fantastic.

Sometimes I wake up and he’s touching my back. Drawing constellations. Solving equations. He says it relaxes him when his mind is running wild. That’s how he first told me he loves me. He wrote it in between my shoulder blades and then whispered it into my neck. He thought I was asleep. I have never been more awake. How is this real?

When I told him that morning I loved him too he looked shocked. He moved closer to me so that our noses touched. I said it again and he kissed me. He held me in his arms and told me he loved me. He loves me!! I love you, Egon Spengler.

Dear Diary or Should I Say Playgirl,

The entry has a polaroid photo taped at the bottom with “JM + ES = L-O-V-E” written under it. He’s hugging her pressing her back into his chest. She looks so small in his arms. His chin rests on her hair and she’s smiling up at him. They look so happy. The version she knew of her mom was loving but guarded. She only opened up to Callie, Trevor, and Phoebe. This woman was completely different.

There are sketches of him reading the newspaper in bed or peering into a microscope with the caption “My mad scientist has no idea why I stare at him all the time. How is he so smart and so dense?”

Dear Diary,

Let me say I think Louis Tully is a perfectly nice man. He was nice as he was Dana’s neighbor and he’s nice now as the Ghostbusters’ accountant. He invited us all over for a party. I saw it as an excuse to wear my new glittery silver dress. Egon didn’t say much when he saw it but this dress is for me anyway. I think my legs look great.

I’m more social than he is which is fine. We both have our strengths. But this one guy is really social. Like he won’t leave me alone social. I’m polite and friendly because I don’t know who he is to Louis. He keeps talking about snorkeling and how I have to try it. Any time I try to gesture to my boyfriend—he cuts me off. He will not let me talk. How is this supposed to seduce anyone? I’m nodding so much that my braid is coming undone. This guy actually reaches forward, fixes my hair, and keeps his hand on my face. I was stunned. Before I can yell at him though, Egon picks me up and plants one on me. The man who will never do anything but hold my hand in front of his friends is kissing me in front of everyone. And not a Disney kiss. My mad scientist used tongue. I’m in heaven.

He tells me we’re going home which is good because my legs have turned to jelly. He notices and swoops me up. My gallant hero carries me out of the party and I love every second of it. I ask him if he likes the dress and he just stares at me. Needless to say, I was extremely sore for the next few days. I found out from Ray that the entire time that guy was talking to me, Egon was fuming. Winston pointed out that I didn’t look very comfortable and touching my face was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Dear Diary,

I’m not surprised when Egon shows up at my apartment without any warning. It’s why he has a key. I am completely surprised when he bursts in, gets on one knee, and tells me his logical argument for marriage.

It will make it easier to buy property as a couple.

Co-habitation is not an issue because we’re always together and he spends most of his nights at my place.

I will no longer be bothered by over-eager men if I have a ring on my left ring finger. It will signal to others that I am spoken for and should prevent further awkward situations.

We balance each other out. Right brain. Left brain.

Most importantly: he loves me.

I can barely speak. He did not need to convince me, but the fact he wanted to is everything I love about him. The ring is a beautiful jade oval jewel with a gold halo of diamonds. I recognize it immediately from the little shop in Soho we passed two weeks ago. I told him it was beautiful but I had no reason to buy it especially since it was just a jewel. Now, he’s soldered it into a ring.

Of course, I accept. The ring is so gorgeous. I can’t believe he made it for me. God, I love him.

Callie recognizes the ring. It’s one her mother kept in a jewelry box, but never wore. She let Callie grab it whenever she played dress-up with her makeup and shoes. She even wore it to prom because it matched her dress. She assumed that her grandmother bought it for her daughter’s namesake. After she died, even when money got tight, she never wanted to sell it. She’s glad now that she didn’t. And he made it for her?

Dear Diary,

Jack and Jill went up the hill

Jack knocked up Jill

And a baby came tumbling after

Dear Diary,

My mad scientist has been so attentive these past nine months. He’s such a darling and yet when I feel that first contraction I nearly punch him. I am so scared I decide maybe I’ll raise our baby girl from inside my body for the rest of our lives. He says that isn’t possible and I remind him that none of his degrees are as an OBYGN. Fuck it hurt and I was promised drugs. I practically yell this at him and he assures me that the drugs are coming. He tries to encourage me but I beg him to let me punch him. I am not a big woman. Why did I think I could have his giant baby? He gives me a kiss and I just want him to let me kill him for just a second. The nurses think he is so sweet. Traitors. He’s the one who did this to me. Then the glorious drugs hit.

I am a fucking rockstar. I gave birth to a BABY! Those Ghostbusters got nothing on me.

I have to say if my Callie had not come out of my body, I would be very confused as to why she is blonde and blue-eyed. Both of her parents are Jewish. I mean, my mom is a Catholic, but that can’t do much, right? I would demand a refund, but she’s just so fucking cute we’re gonna keep her. And she glared at Peter in a way that lets me know she’s 100% mine.

Dear Diary,

Callie is the best four year old I’ve ever met. She cracks me up every day and she’s doing well in pre-school. She’s very smart—no surprise. Sometimes, I miss how wild our lives used to be with the Ghostbusters, but Egon seems to be enjoying his work back at Columbia. It does make it easier with my PhD program to have more normal hours from my mad scientist. I see the way some of his assistants look at him, so every once in a while I like to pop over with Callie to remind them that he’s taken by a certified smoke show. Not my words, Brian, one of the assistants asked Egon how he landed “such a smoke show” the first time I came by. Egon told him “Because the smoke show wanted me”. Damn right I did.

Dana tells me about some freaky thing that happened with Oscar on the street. I suggest she talk to Egon. Callie loves Oscar because he’s a living version of her dolls. I see Dana more now that she works at the museum. I was too busy to take the position and after I showed her the ropes, she was easy to vouch for.

Dear Diary,

Callie is the best four-year-old I’ve ever met. She cracks me up every day and she’s doing well in pre-school. She’s very smart—no surprise. Sometimes, I miss how wild our lives used to be with the Ghostbusters, but Egon seems to be enjoying his work back at Columbia. It does make it easier with my Ph.D. program to have more normal hours from my mad scientist. I see the way some of his assistants look at him, so every once in a while I like to pop over with Callie to remind them that he’s taken by a certified smoke show. Not my words, Brian, one of the assistants asked Egon how he landed “such a smoke show” the first time I came by. Egon told him “Because the smoke show wanted me”. Damn, right I did.

Dear Diary,

The boys are back thanks to some weird emotional slime in the sewer and a lifted court order. I don’t know what any of it means. They’ve run all sorts of tests and Dana’s run right back to Peter. I hope they work it out this time. I never thought I’d be married before they were. I doubt it bothers Oscar because he’s far too little to know his parents are on and off.

Egie suggests an experiment involving this…slime and I think it’s the last time I’ll be involved in something like that. It was quite an experience but I think it’s too exhausting to happen all the time. Maybe for his birthday.

My, my, the Ghostbusters need my help. Ray and Egie need some information regarding art. It has to do with that creepy old man painting at the museum. I dig up what I could since I can access archives they can’t and mark it off into different categories. Apparently, it’s exactly what they want and I’m rewarded with a very enthusiastic kiss right in front of Ray. Who says romance is dead in married life?

Dear Diary,

Callie saw her dad on the television riding the Statue of Liberty and would not stop screaming. That’s not a sentence I can really wrap my head around. Either way, on New Year’s Eve, I bring my child to the museum, insult useless government officials, and wait for my man to save the world. He does, no surprise but god, he comes out covered in that slime. It makes him quite handsy. Welcome to the 1990s.

Dear Diary,

As my Ph.D. program comes closer to the end, I’m wondering if we should give Callie a sibling. Egon’s not very close with his brother and I never had any siblings. It’s quite lonely being an only child and I don’t want that for Callie. His schedule is less hectic between Ghostbusting and his research at Columbia. I hate the idea of giving up my beloved cigarettes again, but if it means more little Spenglers, I think I can do it. It’s certainly fun to try.

I’m not even 30 so it shouldn’t be a problem, but my body has other plans. Egon says he’s perfectly happy with Callie and that if I really want another baby, we can adopt. That’s a little too much wishful thinking considering how his application will look. I love Callie and she’s all I need. I just wish I could’ve made that choice for myself. We let Callie sleep in our bed that night and I know I’m gonna be okay.

Dear Diary,

Something wicked this way comes. I’m not Janine. I’m not psychic, but something is going on with my mad scientist. He’s a little more mad than usual. He’s downright obsessed. And he won’t tell me what’s going on. He’s so withdrawn. It’s not like him at all. He loves to tell me about his research. I know he doesn’t sleep because he’s always having nightmares and he won’t let me comfort him. He just looks scared. I hate this. Of course, our relationship has its ups and downs but he knows deep down I’m here for him. Callie asks me if Daddy’s upset and I know I have to confront him.

We’ve never had such a bad fight. I had to block the door in our bedroom to get him to talk to me after Callie went to sleep. He looked exhausted. I didn’t recognize him. I was so angry and so desperate for answers I was gonna try anything. I didn’t care if he thought I was too stupid to understand. He’s my husband and this is hurting my family.

Finally, he saw how upset I was and tried to explain that something bad was going to happen. I told him that it already happened. My best friend and the love of my life has been shutting me out. He tried to say that all the big events like Dana and Gozer and Vigo—it was all connected to a larger end of the world. He said he had to stop it. He had to make sure I was safe. That Callie was safe. I just burst into tears. Was he losing it? What was I supposed to do? How was he going to stop it? What did that mean? I freaked out. He put his arms around me and held me until I calmed down. He brought me to bed and told me how much he loved me. How much he loved Callie. How he never thought he’d have this kind of life. That he would never stop loving me. He kissed my hair and rubbed my back and I felt safe again.

When I woke up, he was gone. He left a note. It was short:

Jadie, I know you’ll never understand and you’ll never forgive me, but I have to do this for you and Callie.

Forever yours,

Egon

He fucking left me. He left us. I broke every beaker and vial in that fucking lab and I still can’t say how bad this hurts. What am I going to tell Callie?

I got a job at the Art Institute in Chicago. My parents are there and can’t wait to see us. As much as I love my friends, I can’t stay here. This city just reminds me too much of him. We all promise to stay in touch and I want to. I don’t have anything against them. They didn’t leave.

Callie wipes the tears from her eyes. She doesn’t have it in her to relive all her mom’s pain especially now when she knows the truth. Instead, she picks up her final journal.

Hello, old friend,

Been a while, huh? Yeah, life’ll do that to you.

I think if he was dead I would know. Not in some mystic sense. That was never my thing. Honestly, if you told me that all of the strange things that happened from 1984 to 1993 were because NYC had drugged the water I’d believe you. Or maybe we all had some great pot. I’d believe that over what really happened. It’d be a lot funnier.

I think someone would’ve called, right? I know Callie and I are still next of kin. Janine told me some rotting shack is left to me and Callie. Hey, Ma, he left me a house. I’d have to get out an ouija board to tell her that one.

I found my old journals. I was so young. Absolutely consumed with that man. Years earlier, they would’ve been firewood, but not now. I wonder if Ray is still angry. Egon called him once and Ray phoned me after. He really hates him. I don’t think Winston could ever hate anyone. Venkman’s moved on. Dana told me right after he left she wished she hadn’t introduced us. She felt guilty. But she shouldn’t. I gave it my all and it doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have tried.

Callie asked me why I never remarried. As much as I’ve enjoyed my other lovers like Sam or Tatiana, it never was the same. I knew it was special when I had it. He was my lover and best friend. He knew me in a way no one else did. We just fit together. Left brain. Right brain. It didn’t work out as I wanted and even though his leaving felt like he ripped out my heart, I loved him utterly and completely. I’m not ashamed of that. And for a while, he loved me too.

I don’t regret it. I don’t know if I still love him, but I don’t hate him anymore. Isn’t that funny? You’d think I’d know, but I don’t. Because of Callie. Because of Trevor. Because of Phoebe (who reminds me so much of him sometimes I can’t breathe). The loves of my life. My beautiful band of freaks is led by Grandma Freak.

Callie closes the journal and puts it back in the box. She doesn’t even remember falling asleep.

“Mom, I found something.” It feels like a blink of an eye later when Phoebe walks into her room.

Phoebe’s face is bright and excited. It’s enough to pull Callie out of bed immediately.

#ghostbusters #ghostbusters afterlife #ghostbusters II #egon spengler #callie spengler #phoebe spengler #trevor spengler #egon spengler x oc #egon spengler x ofc #oc: jade margolis #fan fic #tw infertility #tw pregnancy

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bladekindeyewear · 4 years

Text

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-03-12

I have been told only a few things about the upd8 that just landed, over Discord by two people:

upd19 feat. 4,901,157 read it. now. note: the featuring note is accurate if in a different base than what you might be expecting

What the fuck does that even mean.

Okay Pretty good chapter.

...from another friend who VERY dislikes HS^2? Oh shit.

I also glimpsed a post that may or may not have been about Homestuck at all at the top of my Tumblr feed for an instant that said “YES YES YES YES YES” in huge bold print. I have no idea whether to be excited or nervous.

Okay, it’s not a Bonus update... let me comb through from an earlier page to be careful not to get a spoilerlook at the pagecount...

...huh. That seems... like a conversation that would be up my alley, but not necessarily unique so far or worth all this crowing about. I thought we were about to get Dirk-aliens with a full Horschestra backing... are we getting something else?

> CHAPTER 6. A Conversation Regarding Relevance

Hmmmmmmmm. With the contrast between their reactions and this ominous buildup, there’s got to be a serious fun-twist coming. Right? --I’ll stop with that talk for the moment though.

space is vast. an unproductive statement, almost a tautology. [...]

Alright, that and the starry background are riffing the fuck off Star Trek. Nice homage to Andrew’s roots.

the lives of the many are far too volatile and instinct-driven

Alt!Callie what the fuck are you doing. This is intentional now. You can’t play this off as “what’s a Star Trek”.

tautologies are, in general, reserved for stories. for narrative device. for finding new and inventive ways to tell an audience that which they already know.

God damnit she’s still doing it

neither of us ever able to convince the other of the righteousness of our stance. we were never meant to agree. it isn’t in our blood.

Blah blah overanalyzing classpect blah

when they scoff at my tautology ‘space is vast’, what do they really know? nothing. as far as any of them have experienced, space does not exist.

It’s still nice to see some real personality leak through on Alt!Callie. We definitely know from her other self that she can develop quite a relatable and colorful one. Have the years helped?

> ==>

dramantic pouse... ........

Also,

-look at that collar. Damn, Callie, that is a collar

very few have stood and looked into the abyss, the true gulf of nothingness that spreads out around the single point of consciousness adrift in a constellation. all the combined weight of sentient endeavour would quail underneath that sheer, irresistible truth. the realization that they are so small, that the universe cares about their puny lives so very little. sitting in the glowing light of the stars this becomes even more apparent

In the official aspect quiz I never took the time to analyze, the aspects were put on a wheel where Space was a neighbor to Void, if I recall correctly. I wonder how much those aspects engender feelings of goddamnit I’m doing it again aren’t I

...

are we out of orange juice?

Yesss let more personality Alt!Callie bleed through, more of it~

Wait, does Alt!Callie even taste through Jade? Isn’t this remote control? Is she vicariously drawing pleasure from Jade’s not-just-meat-or-candy mostly-human taste buds or?

> ==>

JADE: are you talking to me? JADE: because if you are i would like to remind you that i hate!! orange juice!!

OH FUCK YES!!! SHE’S IN THERE AND AWAKE!!! SHE STILL HAS AT LEAST ENOUGH AGENCY TO BE PRESENT AND ARGUE WITH CALLIE! YESSSSSS

no you don’t.

JADE: well i guess i never really had a strong opinion on it before JADE: but now i cant stand it!! JADE: its all you drink!

i like the pulp.

QUIT INADVERTANTLY FORCING SHIT ON JADE WITH NARRATIVESPEAK GIVE HER A BIT OF LEEWAY ALT!CALLIE YOU CONTROLLING--

JADE: its my body and i dont want orange juice! JADE: i hate pulp, and i didnt just make that up to spite you JADE: who wants strings in their juice?

i do.

JADE: ughhhhhhhhh

I have had friends hopefully fantasize about and/or therapeutically roleplay this exact situation with Jade breaking through and arguing with Alt!Callie’s control to make this all a fair bit more palatable but I didn’t dare to hope we’d get even THIS much

Maybe the HS^2 authors DO care about not leaving us wallowing in hopeless witness to the characters’ constant torture and existential turbosuffering!!!! :#D

i realize that jade’s situation is less than ideal from a characterization perspective, but i still politely point out that nobody likes a whiner.

Fuck you, this isn’t CALIBORN you’re trying to repress you asshole! Leave Jade some AGENCY!!!!! She deserves it!!

JADE: fuck you rude calliope inside my head!

YES EXACTLY

JADE: why dont you try being possessed by the spirit of some other version of a good friend of yours, and floated around a spaceship full of people you love JADE: unable to affect anything or say hello to anyone! JADE: then tell me about whiners!

i killed my brother and consumed him.

JADE: sounds like a you problem

Compromise and give her some agency finally come on compromise and give her some agency you red-text twatwaffle

i suggest to the witch that i have spent untold eons in the void between universes, waiting for the moment i would be needed to prevent the dissipation of reality as we know it. her appeals to emotion will not help her. i will remain unmoved.

Oh god damnit.

JADE: well i had to watch my boyfriend and my brother die in front of me on a tiny scaled version of a world that i shrunk for them! JADE: and then spend the next three years talking to myself, wracked with guilt that id killed them!

Oh. God. Damnit. This had better not be where the Suicide trigger warning was coming from. Are there going to be any characters left who DIDN’T emerge from this mess feeling suicidal?!? (I mean if there were any understandable case it would be three years alone on the golden ship Jade but-- I mean COME ON, we have to discuss that in our FIRST GLIMPSE at her since the epilogues?!?)

> ==>

i remind the witch that my time was in the void, which is far darker and lonelier [...]

Oh fuck you don’t compare suffering as an excuse to COMPLETELY body-enslave and squash the agency of someone when you probably don’t have to. You’re just doing what’s COMFORTABLE alt!Callie admit it. There’s a way you could give her some leeway, I’m almost positive.

JADE: even if i had the powers of a first guardian, my brain still worked in modules of human pattern recognition! JADE: three years is a long time for a human teenager, i dont care how many of her molecules are made of a god!

(i love it when jade talks smart, that bit of the epilogues was a treat too, plz reveal more of the big brain on jade)

It seems Jade can’t see or quite understand the full import of there being a “narrative”. Or THINKS she cant, because she still says:

JADE: your voice is impossible to read and i cant see your face

If she’s “reading” alt!Callie’s remarks, that means she’s breaking through to understand the narrative to SOME extent. She might be one of the ones who learns to do that a little more and better in the future, especially with alt!Callie almost unintentionally training her to see it.

> ==>

Oh, good. So A!C’s not above being considerate. That’s a step in the right direction.

> ==>

D’aww, Jade conceding and trying to empathize like her usual self. I appreciate it. :) --but Alt!Callie’s definitely in the wrong here.

JADE: but i think it is a very natural thing to be silly when you are used to being able to control your own body, but now cant

i will allow that, yes.

Thanks. Learn some damned reason.

jade smiles. dave and karkat will always be a source of pain for her, a low ache somewhere in her center of gravity, but she is happy for them. she knows that there is really no other alternative for how to be. they chose each other over her, and they always will. they are the two people who matter to her the most in every universe, and that will not change, no matter how much she wishes it would, no matter how--

JADE: do you actually know that?

pardon me?

Oh, shit.

JADE: do you actually know that im doomed to pine over dave and karkat across every iteration of reality? JADE: like, can you actually see that? JADE: because youre a space player, like i am. JADE: i know that you are more powerful than me, but i dont think you can see other timelines any better than i can JADE: so i think you are just being dramatic JADE: for the “audience”, whatever the heck that means

i experience a moment of unease as jade looks at me. keeping her out of my thoughts is proving to be more difficult than i had first assumed it would be.

That’s a damned interesting question. I was giving the narrative the benefit of the doubt, but given everything the Epilogues warned us about when it came to the narrators and alt!Callie’s occasional slips into her own bias, I really should have known better.

i had begun confident that i could keep her consciousness sleeping peacefully inside the shell of her body, tamed and quiescent, but she has proved to be more irascible than i initially gave her credit for.

JADE: heheh JADE: i have never been particularly tamable, and my consciousness is huge!

This might end up playing out more like my friend’s Jade-breaks-out roleplays than I initially assumed. (What does she mean “huge consciousness” though? Superpowered due to part-First-Guardian, like she alluded earlier in the conversation? That never got much play before, so it’s great to see that potential realized here a bit...)

> ==>

...I’m a fucking idiot. Of COURSE “huge consciousness” and the whole line around it was just an unsubtle double-entendre. A small part of me actually wondered if it was and dismissed it as a clumsy reading in an instant. How stupid am I? Jade is the best.

If only this sort of thing worked on Cherubs.

> ==>

Yeah. It really doesn’t.

...Alt!Callie, you are a fucking war-criminal for bottling all these double-entendres up where none of the others can appreciate them.

> ==>

JADE: you are a pretty tough crowd, evil callie JADE: but yes, i can hear most of what you are thinking to yourself JADE: it took a little while to separate it from my own thoughts, just like it did with dirk JADE: because thats what he was doing the whole time, wasnt it? JADE: controlling our thoughts JADE: making us believe things we never would, things he thought we SHOULD believe

Fucking excellent. She’s definitely training herself on this shit. The more people who have a harder time getting fooled by this nonsense the better.

jade knows all of this, i don’t have to tell her. she is a very bright girl, and even if she didn’t have partial access to my thoughts, she is good at compiling data and using it to fill in gaps. as she herself had rather licentiously mentioned, her brain is quite large.

and all of these reasons are why i know i can count on her to be reasonable and realistic about her situation. i need a body to continue interfacing with this timeline, and her body is the only one that will do.

Dammit. Trying to get her to logic her way back into keeping Alt!Callie in complete control. That’s a tactic that will probably work. :(

what about [kanaya], jade? she is a space player, it is true, but her powers are nothing compared to yours. for one, she isn’t god tier, and for two, she is dead. a living dead, but dead nonetheless.

Hm. Are you saying she maybe has less relevance, less of an effect on her surroundings because she spent some of her “cred” on unconventional partial resurrection? To the extent where she’d make a less influential vessel? Hmm.

For that to even matter, you have to be planning to use Jade’s Space powers too. Taking a far more active role in things than narrative beacon.

and a sylph’s specializations lie on a different end of the spectrum from my own. a witch is a far closer match.

!!!!!

Sounds like details of the classpect system that we don’t know will have relevance in HS^2, and we’re indeed gonna possibly get some actual new, clearer details about the system Andrew invented unlike the dearth of new info the Epilogues brought us. That is... promising.

no, jade understands and sympathizes with my assurance that her body, and her body alone, will do for my purposes.

JADE: um...no i dont!

YES. Jade is now officially immune to absolute command! :D :D :D

she does. after all, she would not wish this sort of state of being on anyone else, and especially not on one of her friends. jade may have undergone a lopsided number of narrative hardships in her life, but at least she is used to them. why spread that suffering to another?

What the fucking shit??? You’re using that on her? You think it’ll WORK?!

jade understands and accepts her place in the story, which has always been to enable events to play out around her, just as it has been mine.

..........yeah Jade’s gonna bust the fuck out on the very next page, isn’t she.

What the fuck is Alt!Callie thinking, here? Wasn’t the other Calliope the one to let us know that the Witch is one of the most active classes there is?? ...what exactly does a Witch officially do anyway, for Alt!Callie to think saying such a thing wasn’t dead wrong? This sounds MUCH more like the sort of statement someone might make after breezing through Homestuck and confusing the old Jade (cough) for the person she grew up into.

And the fact that you’re phrasing this as a narrative command to try and make her forcibly THINK this way deserves you a smack in the non-literal depictive face. Let’s see if you get one:

> ==>

Oh wow, no smack yet?! That’s some restraint!

because what is a story, truly? nothing but a series of misadventures and connections, actions spurring reactions, tumbling into one another, over and over and over. with so many competing interests, clearly the story cannot account for all perspectives, for all threads? it would be laughable, childish, even selfish, to demand that they do.

in other words, not everyone will achieve a happy ending. this is a truth that jade had come to grips with a long time ago.

JADE: wait. JADE: stop. JADE: why are you saying all of this?

Ohh. Because she still had even MORE smackworthy stuff left to say, to make the smack even SMACKIER, didn’t she. Alt!Callie you asshole. If this gets you kicked out of her almost entirely and jeopardizes the crew as Jade struggles to combat Dirk’s narrative influence on her OWN, then I’m fucking blaming YOU! Do you realize how horrible it’ll be if Dirk gets to almost singlehandedly write the whole story around her and the others for the first section of HS^2 with only one or two characters aware and trying to mentally avert it?? We already TRIED that in the Epilogues! It was awful!

jade’s body is my vessel, and it is through this realization that she will understand her true role in the story. her true relevance.

Go fuck yourself, Alt!Callie. Read the audience a bit!

if i released my hold on her consciousness, there would be no guarantee that i would be allowed in again. therefore i cannot permit her the control of herself that she so desperately craves, and she understands that.

THAT’S your reasoning your used-to-surpressing-Caliborn ignorant--!??

JADE: wait. so...you could give me my body back, and then just hop back in when you need to?

in theory, yes.

JADE: then what the hell callie!

because i don’t trust you to cooperate when the time comes.

MotherfuckerTheMusical.mp4

(or real existing equivalent that’s just off the top of my head)

JADE: why not? JADE: i thought you said i was a reasonable girl with a huge brain!

you are, to an extent.

she is. but the truth of the matter remains that humans are capricious and emotional. and even jade herself can admit that she hasn’t been the most...committed example of her species in the last few years.

Oh my fucking god. I know they’re trying to make this more satisfying when she actually DOES take control in a few panels, but, Alt!Callie, seriously, get more on your other self’s level!!!

> ==>

Yes, please >:O some more

moving from lover to lover, job to job, interest to interest. over the last few years jade had found herself listless, unable to settle and unwilling to commit to anything or anyone. she knows there’s nothing wrong with that on a moral level, but on a personal level she’s always believed that she could be more, could do better. be better. and now, because of this, she realizes that sacrifices must be made.

and that she, as a space player, is uniquely built for sacrifice.

JADE: yeah JADE: i guess youre right JADE: i have been such a silly little slut! JADE: hey callie

yes, jade?

JADE: oh my god, whats that!!!!

You are so fucking screwed Alt!Callie.

this space is utterly under my control. jade could control it too, if she had any access to her own powers. but with my grip around her cortex, there is no chance of that.

(Wait, there’s an extent to which this space is “real” and not imaginary? Or does holding her space powers in check also mean keeping her imaginary space powers in check?)

Anyway, here comes the smack. And, though Alt!Callie deserves this, I hope Dirk isn’t let in too often amidst the others as a result.

> ==>

Yup, poising to pounce...

> ==>

I thought there was a weird infinity symbol underneath them but it’s just two spotlights and a shadow cast by her head.

and here i make my first mistake.

No you made your first mistakes WAAAY earlier in this conversation. And what you did to Jade in general. She’s a hero/player for a reason, she doesn’t take stuff lying down forever.

but bringing her into a place where we can both physically manifest has left me, foolishly, vulnerable.

First, physically manifest? This isn’t pure imaginationspace? And second, she’s going to blame her polite concession to Jade for this and hold on even tighter the next time, isn’t she. God damnit, not looking forward to that. Alt!Callie won’t learn her lesson til the end, will she? :(

her fingers tear at my throat, trying to find purchase. she won’t be able to kill me here, but it is certainly unpleasant, and not to mention slightly repetitive. we just saw this in the previous chapter, although this particular fight will not end as amorously as the last one did. so don’t get your hopes up.

JADE: who! JADE: are you talking to!

I really hope Jade ends up with full narrative powerOOOOOHHHH FUCK THEY COULD GO FOR THAT HUH

Dirk was able to become an Ultimate Self in his own body because it was the uniting of an irrepressible “self” that he always unbreakably represented. The others had more trouble.

But Jade

has a BIG PART-GOD BRAIN as reinforced in the narrative repeatedly!!

Meaning that later, SHE could Ultimate Self without ANY PHYSICAL CONSEQUENCE. :D

I was hoping Jade would end up with full narrative-dictating-and-reading power when she wants to use it, at some point, but I might’ve been aiming too low! :D :D :D

Yaaaaaaaaaaaay

Now all the playfully-horny omnipotent Jade fanfics are true, what that totally isn’t part of why I love this go ahead and admit she doesn’t deserve it

> ==>

Yesss flashy gif struggle against control! (Though, not as elegant as one of Andrew’s might’ve been. Gotta say.)

> ==>

Blinky-eyes about to resolve normal-Jade-colored....!

> ==>

Wait, what? I thought Jade was about to snap in and--

during the ship’s trip through space, there have been numerous experiments; modifications to the nutrition output of the various machines designed to create sustenance for the various species on board. i myself have been content with orange juice and synthetic proteins, but dave and roxy have both expressed longing for various ‘earth snacks’, and so the trials and errors began.

What the fuck? I don’t even know where this is going if it’s punways.

Is there like a dog treat somewhere that’s gonna push her over the edge? Where is this headed even.

> ==>

Wh...

WHa??????

the results were mixed. as roxy told us in a previous chapter, alchemized food all sort of tastes the same, although the visuals really help to bring about the flavor. and at the end of the day, isn’t it the journey that is more important than the destination? the stories you tell as you create the strangely flavored nutritional paste?

JADE: ????????????

Um?? What’s even going on.

so far, everyone’s favorite attempt has been a vaguely peanut-butter and chocolate flavored creation called "Rices'". nobody eats them really. they just sit in a bowl on the counter.

i’m not actually sure what the witch is trying to accomplish here.

Is Jade trying to humorously gross Alt!Callie out of her body with a candy she doesn’t like or? But, “suicide threat”? Why joke--

JADE: you dont? JADE: really?

i don’t know what she is trying to accomplish, because surely she would not be doing what it appears she is trying to do. making such a meaningless threat.

JADE: meaningless? JADE: do you even know anything about the body you stole? JADE: shouldnt you have run some sort of psychic physical before you possessed it? JADE: its definitely what i would have done!

Oh SHIT. You mean Jade has the same peanut allergy JOHN does?!?

> ==>

jade must know that i am well-aware of her family-wide peanut allergy. a story thread that has been extremely important and weighed in on in multiple parts of the narrative. how could i have forgotten such a key detail?

...yes, she totally forgot, but more than that.

I’m betting John is the ONLY one with a peanut allergy. That Jade is USING that fact to bluff like hell. :D

(Allergies aren’t usually inherited that way you alien!)

there is nothing remotely just or heroic about dying from self-imposed anaphylactic shock in the throes of a childish tantrum. at the most i’ll get a relaxing few minutes of sleep.

Is Alt!Callie bluffing now? Even a resurrecting death could throw her off.

> ==>

FUCK YES JADE.

JADE: do you really want to risk it?

what are you talking about, jade? i just said--

FUCK YES JADE, BE A HUGE WITCH

(i say in the most witch-connotatively and non-classpect-related way)

JADE: i dont know, callie JADE: ive never really understood the rules that govern the death of a god tier, have you? JADE: it seems pretty arbitrary from where im standing JADE: who makes the decision whether or not something is heroic or just?

...that’s unclear. but it certainly isn’t you.

JADE: right, of course not JADE: but are you so confident that youre a good guy? JADE: are you sure that the alpha timeline WANTS you to be here?

...what.

JADE: youve done some stuff, callie JADE: im only saying you shouldnt be so quick to assume that me killing you wouldnt be just JADE: and that taking my own life to do it wouldnt be heroic

Even with JUST this one fucking situation Alt!Callie put her in, throwing off her control forever by dying would be shortsighted but HELLA JUST. What Alt!Callie is doing to her is a crime.

Oh shit!?!?

> [S] ==>

What is this, HTML5? *clicks play*

...for a second, I thought this was gonna launch into a huge thing with that clock ticking song from the Felt album.

Having Rose and Dirk’s colors competing here really reinforces that... Prospit vs Derse vibe that was feeding the whole this-is-the-basis-for-the-game’s-structure-and-the-birth-of-Paradox-Space theory more earlier.

> ==>

i don’t let the witch manipulate me. i refuse to falter in the face of her whispers. without my careful planning and swift action, the prince would have taken full control over this timeline. none of my friends could even begin to imagine the turmoil.

In the end, you’re ignoring what’s right and brave in this instance to instead do something EXPEDIENT, to the exclusion of trust and compassion when things COULD work out just as well without taking the worst actions -- which is textbook villainous.

> ==>

JADE: they arent your friends!! JADE: you took them from me!

Now isn’t THAT a way to put it. :D :D :D

Alt!Callie is sinning almost as badly as Dirk, here. Viewing everyone else as characters in a story, the only way she’s ever viewed “friends”, and her as the not-so-humble narrator doing what’s best for all of them. If she’s going to win against Dirk -- or if that victory is going to MEAN anything -- she will HAVE to realize that she needs to be different.

JADE: you keep saying that youre doing all of this for my own good, but youre just lonely! JADE: i know you are, because so am i!

Ouch.

Will Alt!Callie force her to swallow it?

JADE: you said that being a space player is all about sacrifice JADE: well

> ==>

JADE: bet

...I guess she really might have an allergy.

> ==>

Aaaand the candy drops. A W A K E ! ! ! !

Yaaaaay Jade is BACK and we’ll get to see even more of her!!!

...please tell me on the next page she grabs the candy, noms it, and mentions she doesn’t have a peanut allergy after all. That would be sweet.

> ==>

...

Nope, you just leave us on a sad. Dammit, why do you gotta be all adult and showin’ us both sides in a moment of triumph, HS^2. Shucks.

Anyway, YAY JADE! C:

I am happy by this, if slightly too emotionally-rollercoastered by the past 24-hours to give this the full-rejoicing it deserves. That, and worried about the openings Dirk will get because of this... joy now for potential frustration later, even if Jade tries her best to let Alt!Callie back in in-time.

See y’all next time! And, uhm. I guess I’ll comment on whatever other asks I promised to comment on another less-eventful day. Keep reminding me and holding me to it though!

#Homestuck #hs2 #Homestuck Liveblog #upd8 #Homestuck^2 #bladekindeyewear #blastyoboots #(yes the past 24-hours includes witnessing everyone's despair at realizing the president is going to get our family members virus-killed)#Jade Harley

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