#i would feed him a frootloop

[call-me-strega]

How to Become a Step-Dad in 5 Easy Steps: part 1

Jason meets Single Dad Danny who is taking care of a de-aged Dani while trying to get his degree at Gotham U. Both of them fall hard, hijinks and shenanigans ensue, simping on both sides.

Edit: background info/lore found here

Edit: part 2 now found here

~~~~

Step 1: Meet an attractive single parent

As a Crime Lord/vigilante Red Hood had multiple safe houses that he used in and out of the mask. Some were for each exclusive identity to prevent anyone from linking them together and others used for both. Currently, Jason was walking out of his 2nd favorite safe house and the mostly permanent residence of “civilian and non-profit worker: Jason Todd” with a plate of cookies and a pan full of lasagna for his new neighbors that moved in two doors down. He may have been a street rat but he’d be damned if Alfred and Talia hadn’t taught him hospitality (it was a fact of life that grandparents and Asian people would try to feed their guests like their honor depended on it). Plus it was a great way to do some reconnaissance on whether or not these new neighbors could potentially pose an issue. The apartment complex was on the border of Crime Alley and Burnley meaning the people who lived there weren’t doing too hot money-wise but were at least able to avoid the worst of Crime Alley. Jason was just planning to go over introduce himself, hand over the homemade food, and head off to a different safe house to get his gear and patrol. However, he was not expecting to see his new neighbor standing outside struggling to open his own door, a six-year-old on his hip, arguing with someone over the phone. The young man had a lean build and appeared to be no older than 20, give or take a year or two. He had black bangs that cast a shadow on his face making his eye-bags appear even darker and startling blue eyes clouded with anger and resentment, likely towards whoever was on the phone. He was so occupied with his conversation he didn’t seem to notice that someone else had stepped into the hallway. He was wearing dark blue jeans and a loose white shirt with a NASA logo on it that slightly hung off his shoulder. He also wore a black hoodie with a white hood and neon green accents that seemed to be subject to his sister(?)’s death grip. Despite his disheveled state, there was something about his new neighbor that drew him in. His aura washed over Jason like a cool breeze on a hot day making it hard for Jason to look away. He would have continued assessing the man if he hadn’t made eye contact with the identical blue eyes of the young girl perched on his hip, who looked at him with a curious sparkle in her eyes. He discreetly turned back around to lock his own door, trying to eavesdrop on the conversation the elder (brother?) seemed to be having. It could provide some info on these new neighbors.

“-shut up Vlad! I’m not moving into your rich guy penthouse! I wouldn’t be taking any of your shady money if I didn’t need child support for Ellie!”

Huh. So her dad/guardian then?

“ Of course I have to do this Vald! What’s the other option, sending her back to a Frootloop like you?! … I’m not going to abandon Ellie for something that wasn’t her choice. She didn’t ask to be created Vlad that’s why she gets a chance.”

Okay so setting aside the rather concerning parts New Neighbor Guy™️ was definitely that child’s parent. Seems fairly rational as well.

“How do I know you’d be a terrible guardian? Plenty of reasons, do you want the list chronologically or alphabetized! You violated me, who you said you wanted to adopt despite me having two living parents, you created Ellie and several other failed attempts without my knowledge, you hid her from me, you tried to teach her to hate me before we even met, you named her Danielle after me instead of giving her her own identity, the list goes on and on Vlad! Do you want me to continue because that’s just the stuff that involves Ellie— I was 14, you middle-aged vampire look-alike! Of course I wasn’t jumping at the chance to become a teen dad! I was a freshman in high school! Besides you know what my parents are like, lab safety regulations were more like a healthy suggestion to them. I was in no position to be taking care of a child!”

Rage flashed in Jason’s eyes as he tightened his grip on his glass Tupperware pan full of lasagna. This conversation was not painting a pretty picture about his neighbor’s situation. He took a deep breath trying to calm himself before belatedly realizing his neighbor had gotten real quiet. He turned around, catching the tail end of his neighbor’s conversation as he finally succeeded in opening the door.

“Whatever Vlad, just keep paying your child support and for Ancients’ sake please stop trying to date my mom. …. Yeah, yeah screw you too Count Chocula.”

The neighbor set his daughter down, likely so she could enter the apartment, and slipped his phone from between his head and shoulder into his hand to hang up on that Vlad guy. Now seemed like as good a time as any to approach. Jason walked up the the young man and coughed trying to get his attention. The young man met Jason’s eyes with a somewhat surprised look. As if he wasn’t unaware of Jason’s presence but hadn’t expected him to talk to him. Jason decided he should start speaking now before things got too awkward.

“Uh- Hi, I’m Jason. I live a few doors down in 357,” he said glancing at the 353 on his neighbors’ door before he continued. “I heard you moving in a few days ago and thought I’d swing by with some food to welcome you to the building.” He stuck out his hand for the other to shake.

“Hi I’m Danny, Danny Nightingale,” he said taking Jason’s hand and ‘Wow his hands are cold’, “ and this little munchkin here is Ellie!” Danny and Ellie flashed him matching smiles like twin suns making Jason's heart melt. He returned their smiles before extending the food to Danny.

“ I don’t know if you’ve had time to get groceries yet but here’s some homemade lasagna if you need a quick meal while you’re getting settled,” he then crouched down to Ellie’s level and stage-whispered in her ear conspiratorially “ and there are some chocolate chip cookies on that plate too.”

Ellie giggled out a thank and threw her arms around Jason’s neck, giving him a quick hug before letting go and dashing into the apartment. Jason watched her go, stunned but feeling warm and fuzzy inside. He turned his attention back to Danny, who shook his head and huffed amusedly. They made eye contact as Jason rose and realized he was a head taller than the guy. He felt the heat expanding in his chest and crawling up his neck, curling behind his ears. He decided now that Ellie had gone in it would be a good time to talk to Danny about what he overheard.

“ So it really wasn’t my intention to do so but I overheard some of that conversation you were having over the phone earlier,” he watched Danny’s smile drop a bit as he winced. Jason awkwardly brought up his hand to scratch the back of his neck and continued.

“ Look I don’t wanna insert myself into your situation but if you ever need help I’m just a few doors down. And if that guy gets pushy or stops sending his child support I can help you find a couple of avenues you can take. Plus, although we’re technically outside Red Hood’s territory I’m sure he wouldn’t mind extending protection over you like he does for the other Crime Alley folk if ya really need it.”

Danny’s face smoothed out looking a bit flushed and appreciative as he went on. He gave Jason a small smile and replied, “ Thank you for the offer. I really do appreciate it. Might just take ya up on it at some point. As for Red Hood? I think I’ll avoid needing the protection of a crime boss vigilante if I can help it. Don’t worry too much about Vlad though. I’ve got him handled currently and he’ll behave if he knows what’s good for him!” Danny smiled threateningly towards the end of his reassurance. (‘His canines are peaking out that’s so cute’)

Jason chuckled with Danny as their eyes locked once more. They stayed lost in each others’ eyes for what seemed like hours before they heard a thump followed by a small “oof” coming from inside the apartment. Danny turned to the door and called out to Ellie,

“Ellie, what was that? Are you okay”

“I’m fine! My shirt just fell!”

“That sounded heavier than a shirt?”

“I was in it!”

Danny sighed, shaking his head before turning to Jason once more.

“Thank you again for the food, any chance you’d like to come in and have something to drink?”

“Thanks for the offer but I’ll have to decline. I need to start heading out for work.”

“Well then, I shouldn’t keep you. I’d hate to make you late for work.” He waved goodbye as Jason nodded his head and started walking down the hall.

His neighbors seemed entirely harmless he decided as he walked away. ‘The kid was cute’ he thought to himself. A smaller voice from the back of his head that sounded vaguely like the Pits chimed in ‘Her dad was even cuter.’

~~~~~ Please let me know what you guys think and if you want to see more of this. I thrive on feedback so feel free to leave any notes or comments!

#dc x dp #danny phantom #jason todd #danny fenton #danielle fenton #jason todd x danny fenton #dead on main #single parent au #SingleDad!DannyFenton #de-aged Ellie #long post #fluff #comedy #misunderstandings #How to Become a Step-Dad in 5 Easy Steps #HBSD sounds like a good acronym #Better than HBSD5ES

[jrueships]

your mind ... impenetrable

no further comment

;))

i Know . * makes a This (that^^^) Face

#it's because i eat vanilla yogurt 😏. #i mean im willing too and ill have a good time doing it until i find a tiny speck of smthin in it then ill feel betrayed n never eat again #i dont play when it comes to suspicious specks in what should be smooth food TRUST #when a bitch says no pulp THERE BETTER BE NO PULP !!!! #and by bitch i mean juice carton #anyways what was i supposed to be goin on abt???? smthin abt tops runnin the world #oh nvm thats a picture of dj that just contrasted my whole self statement well whatever the fugly can stay i guess #ANYWAYSANYWAYS thank u <33 glord knows i am ALWAYS down for funky compliments #lots of people want to burrow into my mind and study it but thankfully YOU have come to the proper understanding that it is #UNBURROWABLE !!!!!!!!! #bcs there is nothing in there. u will fall like alice in the wonderland but stuck on the falling alice in the wonderland loading screen #i wonder what post of mine prompted this ask lol ? #BUT YEA THANK U I ENJOYED THIS COMMENT VRY MUCH #jimmy can try all he wants to drill his kyle/jimmy propaganda into my pituitary #but i will consistently ward him away with jimmy switch supremacy ideals #my mind is in a constant war in which it can never wax nor wane #love wins #ted asks #dj is so ugly #i would feed him a frootloop

[phandomphightclub]

Round 3 Match 1: @realnutbusters vs. @lexosaurus

“Oh no, not this guy again,” Danny groaned when one of the next phighters entered the ring.

“What about him?”  Sam asked, squinting.  “You find the Ghostbusters outfit offensive?”

“Huh?  What - no, he just turned the whole ring into a ballpit last time.  I don’t want to sit for another hour while they clean that up.”

“Hey, we could always eat more free pancakes!”  Tucker grinned, scarfing down more of the blueberry goodness that one of the waiters had delivered earlier.

“They’re not exactly ‘free.’ They put it on my tab,” Danny said, resting his chin in his palm.  “Apparently I’m a celebrity, and they still won’t give me a discount.”

“Hey, it’s expensive running a Phight Club,” Tali said.  “Especially when we’re feeding you our money.”

Tucker’s eyes widened as he looked down at the pancakes.

“They barter with those here, apparently,” Danny explained.  Meanwhile, Tali lifted the mic.

“Alright, you frootloops, it’s time for a match you’ve all been waiting for!  Realnutbusters - yeah, you’ve already seen his costume so I’m not gonna make a crappy pun about it - versus the living, er, dead meme herself: Lexosaurus!”

True to her word, the other ghost hovering into the ring was some demonic embodiment of memes.  Her whole form shifted and glitched with emojis, Spongebob screenshots, and fidget spinners.  The only part that seemed stable was her terrible white bowlcut.

“Now that just hurts to look at.”  Danny winced.

“PHIGHT!”

Realnutbusters lifted his ghost-sucking vacuum, but before he could aim Lexx had already glitched out of his view.  He spun, keeping his weapon raised, but was taken from behind when Lexx flashed back into visibility.

“SWAG!”  She shouted, dabbing as her whole form flickered with the colors of flames.

“Get back here so I can bust you!”  Realnutbusters shouted, but Lexx blew a raspberry and vanished again.  The crowd sat on the edge of their seats, waiting to see where she would appear.

No one seemed to expect her to appear below Realnutbusters’ feet.  With a deep “YEET!”  She flung him into the air.

Somehow from their contact, Realnutbusters had picked up some of Lexx’s glitching form.  He flickered and pixelated as he flew through the air - and through the shield at the top of the arena.

“That’s new,” Tali said with a sigh, then pressed a button on her walkie-talkie.  “Vic?”

“Yep, I saw.”

“Great.  You know what to do then.”

“Mobilizing the Security Force now.  Don’t worry, we’ll get to him before Walker sees.  Or else I’m sure Cluelessintheusa is itching to test out her Security Marbles.”

Tali laughed.  “Gotcha. Over and out.”

Static buzzed before Tali let go of the button and blew her kazoo.

“Realnutbusters is unable to battle!  Lexosaurus wins!”

#round 3 #mod tali #writeup #results #realnutbusters #lexosaurus #this is the last for a little bit #gotta go to another 3 hour class #rip me

[v3-imagines-hell]

V3 Boys With an S/O Who Sneaks A Kitten Into Class

Ask: Here’s something cute. The ndrv3 boys notice their s/o is acting a little odd. They keep checking the inside of their bag during class, and seem to keep putting bits of food inside. Then they get quite the surprise when their s/o shows the tiny kitten they were hiding. What’s their reaction?

This was so adorable! Thanks for the ask!!

-Mod Rantaro

Rantaro Amami

-He’s so done

-This is the twelth time you have looked inside your bag

-As soon as class lets out, he confronts you about it.

-”Ok, you have something in the bag. No one looks inside of their bag that often. What is it?”

-You’re stuttering and denying it before finally giving in and pulling him inside an unlocked classroom

-”Not a word.” You say as you open the bag and oh my god

-”Why is-”

-”Don’t ask.”

-You adopt the cat and name it Mittens

Shuichi Saihara

-I headcanon that Shuichi is mildly allergic to cats

-He’s been sneezing the entire class period. But there’s no cat????

-Then he realizes he only sneezes when you open the bag

-Suspicion. Why the fuck are you putting frootloops in your bag?

-Then- what the fuck is that

-He sees a fluffy orange head pop out from the bag

-Uhm????

-He sneezes again

-It’s so cute but now he’s sick

Kokichi Ouma

-He knew the moment he saw your bag move

-Well he didn’t know what kind of animal, but it was something

-The moment lunch starts, he confronts you

-”S/O~! I know you have something in your bag that you aren’t showing your adorably cute Supreme Leader Boyfriend~!”

-You can’t lie so you just show him the short-haired calico cat in your bag

-He’s swooning

-If you don’t keep it then he does

-He calls the cat his “THIRD IN COMMAND IN D.I.C.E. You’re always my second in command, S/O~”

-He names it Hana

Korekiyo Shinguji

-How the teacher didn’t notice was a total mystery to him

-Your bag was constantly moving throughout the entire class, so he was quick to talk to you about it

-Before you could even say anything, the tiny, hyperactive kitten, poked its head out from the bag and started meowing like crazy

-You tried to keep it in your bag but the cat basically said fuck you and jumped out, and onto Kiyo

-The kitten really liked his hair. Oh dear

-The kitten is stuck

-He’s slightly annoyed but now has a bit of a quite literal attachment. He names the cat Fae.

Kaito Momota

-You did not plan on showing Kaito this kitten for good reason

-He would immediately adopt it

-And he did when he suddenly looked at your bag to see a black cat staring at him.

-Wh

-He takes the cat out of your bag and just runs once class is over

-His name is Orion

Kiibo

-Kiibo was 98% sure that school bags were not living objects

-So why were you feeding it?

-You decided to tell him why after class

-And look there’s an adorable multi-colored cat that you saved from the cold

-Kiibo just. Freaks out and places the cat in his arms, and turns on his heating function

-You’re kinda shook but hey now you have a cat

-He decides on Marilyn

Ryoma Hoshi

-holy fuck he loved cats

-and you knew this

-And when your neighbor was giving away his Russian Blue kittens, it was perfect

-You bring the cat with you to school, and then give Ryoma the kitten during Free Period

-”*chuckle* I really do not deserve you, (S/O).”

-Another cat to add to the rest

-13 cats in total. And her name is Anastasia

Gonta Gokuhara

-Because of how he was brought up, he prefers dogs

-But that doesn’t stop him from being ecstatic when he sees the cat in your bag!

-Of course he’s confused because you aren’t supposed to have pets in school, and he does kinda scold you for it

-But he still loves the kitten nonetheless!

-But he feels like he would be betraying his family but taking the cat, so he let’s you keep it, but he doesn’t have any like. Ownership of whatnot.

#kiibo #kitties #kitty #kitten #mod rantaro #amami rantarou #new danganronpa v3 #danganronpa kokichi #danganronpa #ndrv3 spoilers #ndrv3 #ryoma hoshi #gonta gokuhara #kaito momota #korekiyo shinguji #shuichi saihara #kokichi ouma #allergies

[stripesquadsideblog]

how to catch crazy.

so like how did Shizuma go from this

to this?

i mean he was calm enough and sensible enough to be allowed to teach young kids and now hes crazier than a shithouse rat. so what the actual fuck shizuma?

here me out because i think it has something to do with Samehada

like do you notice the downward spiral into frootloops starts pretty much as soon as he picks up the sword?

for most of the time we see him in the first episodes hes ...fairly calm and collected. people know hes usually up to no good given by how causally he talks about being on Penance ( i mean hes probably done it before) but i dont think anyone thought he was anything more than a trouble maker. Mei and chojuros reactions upon seeing the stripe squads names written in blood on the walls is more like “ what are these pesky kids up to now” rather than being actually worried 

im really torn between thinking shizuma is an actual threat  and hes just a stupid kid. on the one hand he got taken out by 2 genin while he was using samehada. Chojuro himself says shizuma doesn't know what the shit hes doin with that thing. 

but on the other hand he was proven to be murdering people that disagreed with him and he clearly had quite a few supporters. so fair to middling threat? more like hes a scapegoat for the stuff going on in the background. like i mentioned before i think someone is pulling his strings and praying on the fact hes a kid and just wants things to go back to the blood mist for shallow reasons.

either way back on topic

i am convinced that wielding samehada made him a bit nutty and unstable. samehada has been repeatedly shown to be capable of sentient thought. it can even choose its owner.

it is also capable of being “hungry” for chakra. its possible that all that time spent in a lock box after the war made samehada starving, to the point it would latch onto the first source of chakra it came across to feed on.

is it possible that some of the chakra that samehada ate at one point has been transfered back to shizuma? maybe the person whos chakra it ate was the opposite to shizumas and hes having some sort of chakra allergic reaction?

or maybe its to do with his own chakra. the more he loses to samehada the more desperate he gets and his calm facade comes crashing down?

 i mean he does totally forget about samehada in an attempt to stab boruto with that ice sword. its only after kagura gets involved and reminds him what hes about to lose does he jump back and call samehada back to him. 

then things go really mouth over ass. samehada swallows him whole and shizuma totally loses himself.

i mean technically he did get the rampage he wanted after all.

now you could chalk this up to shizuma being backed into a corner and being forced to realize hes not going to get what he wants and that alone would be enough to drive someone as driven as him to madness.

given what the other wielders of samehada are like its safe to say shizuma is VERY different from bee or kisame. bee and kisame were fairly calm and collected ( i wont say cool because rappers are nerds and kisame was itachis attack dog) and shizuma isnt really any of those things.

or maybe im talking nonsense and being mad as a sack of cats is just a prerequisite for being a swordsman of the mist  coughraigaburriedpeoplealivecough

TL:DR i think something about wielding samehada made shizuma nuts. it was either the chakra consumption or the stress of wielding such a powerful sword or maybe just the fear of what might happen if he failed.

#shizuma hoshigaki #shizuma headcanons #samehada #kisame #boruto #Caxy had a thought #headcanon #long post sorry

[shewillbeanonymous-blog]

I live with a person

I live with a person that feeds on negative attention. A person that is seemingly kind in the moment and your enemy in the blink of an eye. There are holes in the walls covered by paintings, they have the ability to control a situation with empty and real threats, the addiction to being ill and disabled; this is the bare bones truth. I will never hold back again.  I am a young adult surrounded by four accidentally placed concrete walls. I am in a long term relationship that blossomed from like-values and an instant feeling of comfort that landed me between these walls and not for one moment would I regret or let that relationship go away. But it got me here. We are a mature couple with goals. We are a mature couple whose savings come before spending. These four concrete walls are free. FREE; and that means we are lucky, grateful, and whole heartedly thankful for every night we can sleep under a free roof with free food on our table which enables us to better our future. In return we are kind, accepting of every situation we are exposed to, clean, helpful, understanding, family oriented people. But we live with a person. We live with a person because an apartment or rental is throwing away our future funds for our children to enjoy classes and activities. We are not underachievers, we are planners. We value preparedness. We appreciate finer things only when we have worked for them. We are nothing like this person. This person gains gravity by wanting and buying, with money they do not have. Their money comes from the same source our free living arrangement comes from. Except with one difference: We are grateful.  This person’s violence is snowballing. When I first met my now significant other, I had gone over to the house to visit. As I approached the door, a ceramic dinner plate was thrown at the wall at the person I was going to visit. My heart hit the floor with the pieces, because it showed me how my boyfriend’s childhood had molded him into the person he is now. He pleases. He was shy. He was angry, but hid it so well I never saw it except for during arguments when he would suddenly yelp with anger that came from deep down, and I sympathized. I love him in a way nobody else could understand; and over the years I’ve watched his anxious hands write up essays, the aggravated tone he has when he gets annoyed by people, his exhausted eyes close at night. He’s a firefighter and brightens the lives of people in our community, participates in every event he possibly can, also works a full time job, keeps me happy, and makes time to learn new things. He’s also only twenty three years old, and for twenty three years he has been lonely in his own family home. I vow to spend the rest of my years making sure that he is loved. This person is older than my boyfriend by five years. He uses it to a negative advantage. As children, my boyfriend would spend his days in the woods building forts by himself to get away from this person who was at home screaming. My boyfriend hid in his attic and called his grandmother for help, when left home alone with this person. My heart aches imagining his fear. He met me at age sixteen, I was seventeen. It was not love at first sight, but it was love at first conversation. We never stopped talking since then. I moved in to his family home when I was nineteen and in bad shape. I had an eating problem. I couldn’t eat. I overcame it by his attention, his willingness to lay in bed with me and feed me single grapes and frootloops cereal, his warm body next to mine every single night. I realized I not only wanted that, but needed that to be comfortable. He accompanied me to every doctor’s appointment, dental appointment, flu shot. He is the ground that I stand on and I put him first before anything. That is why I still live with a person.  I live with a person that was trained to believe that he can get away with what ever his mind comes up with. A person who abuses his parent’s credit card and is allowed to continue to do so. A person who has never been disciplined, which makes me resent his kind parents from time to time, and it is very frustrating. Their excuse is that they want to baby him so he’ll move out. It is not working, and he will be thirty in two years. This person has punched his girlfriend in the nose and it nearly broke, they have smashed photos of my boyfriend’s accomplishments, they expect the world and do not have a job or education, they are addicted to being sick - but they are not sick. But every day is a headache, cold, flu, sore knee, sore toe, foggy brain due to the weather change, and everyone believes it like it is being preached by a pastor in front of the Lord. This person will have a “splitting headache” but spend the day yelling about how they deserve more money. This person will feel sick one moment and get in their free vehicle and drive around the neighborhood burning free gas and buying free food with a credit card that has no consequence for being swiped. Empty threats for misbehaving are the daily norm.  At age nineteen, living in this home while I save for a safe, comfortable home of my own has been the closest thing to hell I can imagine for a quiet person like I was. I am not that way anymore. Now I am aggravated by noises, a short fuse with an opinion about everything, so much anxiety I can barely drive to work some days, so much anger for someone who I have to pretend to like because they are “family” and will milk that statement until the day they pass away, leaving me resentful and hateful. Nearly every week is screaming with the same pattern of “don’t yell,” instead of “don’t yell or else.” The same rigmarole of hearing about money, stocks, not having a job but not wanting one because they don’t want a menial position, they want to be the head honcho. It’s terribly rude comments towards parents, telling them to shut the fuck up, and that they aren’t helping him in any way, they have a deadline to get him a job instead of him going to drop resumes off, or that they have a deadline to buy him a house he can live in for free. There is nothing he cannot say. There is nothing he is not allowed to do, because there has never been a single consequence placed. His mother has admitted to being an enabler. Her excuse wasn’t stated, so I believe she doesn’t have one.  I have spent hundreds of nights in bed crying next to my stone cold angry boyfriend beside me who is mentally exhausted. I am emotional, he is angry - neither of us can do anything about it. I tell him to say something, he unleashes the anger on me, telling me that he cannot do anything to convince his parents of what to do differently. Even if we left, this person is still “family.” There is no escape. How does one stay on the right financial pathway, but live here? How does one not cave and go buy the cheapest shack possible to get away? I guess we are that strong to our plan, and to each other. We will be miserable until we finally flourish into stable adults with a wonderful family of our own, and maybe someday this person will fade out of our lives. The selfishness, disgusting behavior, and terrible comments might disappear. Until then, I live with a person. 

#pain family unfair circumstance noescape