Sabrina: Hey Lilith , can we go with you to Hell?
Lilith: What did Zelda say?
Sabrina: She said no.
Lilith: So why are you asking me
Sabrina: Because she's not the boss of you.
Lilith, internally: it's a trap it's a trap it's a trap it's-
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zelda: (hesitates) madam satan.
lilith: well, i gotta admit, you surprised me tonight. i didn't know a little witch like you could pull that off (chuckles evilly).
zelda: yeah, well you- you look- you walk like a- (pauses) marry me.
lilith:
zelda:
lilith: ...yes.
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Lilith: what is up with this neighborhood?! some van just pulled up and these creepy characters are getting out!
Hilda: that is a school bus Lilith, and those are children, my love.
Lilith: well i don't like the way they're looking at me
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hilda: have you ever had sex before?
lilith: oh yeah, I get fucked all the time.
hilda: really?
lilith: yep. by life, death, fate, god, your sister...
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Hilda: “I wish you could block people in reality.”
Lilith: *muffled* “m u r d e r.”
Zelda: *hand covering Lilith's mouth* “Restraining order.”
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One of the worst parts of being lesbian or Bi is always asking yourself if you actually have a crush on your friends or if you just hug them all the time bc you're really close
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Lilith: did you get my message?
Zelda: Obviously! You taped it to my forehead while I was sleeping!
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Caliban: Did it hurt?
Sabrina:What?
Caliban: When you fall from heaven?Because your beauty is-
Sabrina: (rolls her eyes) That wasn't me.That was my father*goes*
Nick:Nice one dude,nice one.
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incorrect madam spellman
lilith: my darling witch?
zelda, facing away from lilith to coo at baby leticia: yes, my queen?
lilith: breast or thighs?
zelda: honestly, lilith. you are the QUEEN of hell, must i really remind you how sexist that question is? women are not objects. we have a daughter. is that what you want her to-(faces lilith) oh...
lilith, holding a cleaver in one hand and a chicken in the other: :>
zelda: TT
lilith: you were saying?
zelda: breast.
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Lilith, sharpening a stick: okay I’m ready to fight the hoards of hell
Zelda, holding a shotgun: ??? you know magic???
Lilith, brandishing her stick: yeah, and?
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Lilith: I’ve never had a best friend before.
Zelda: Well, I suppose I could be your best friend.
Lilith:
Lilith: I’ve never had a girlfriend either.
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Yo, Lilith was never a child.
Could she be the child in the ship with her and Zelda? She was refined with Adam, aka Mary's fiance, but imagine her with Zelda.
Zelda: Lilith, we need a light.
Lilith: don't worry, babe, I got this. *stomps feet and her sneakers light up.*
Zelda: why are you like this?
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Young lesbian witch: lesbians and bisexual women, I seek your advice.
Zelda: Men are like the world, hard and cruel.
Lilith: Titty soft and warm.
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Zelda: Lilith is the right brain
Lilith: TITTIE.
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Lilith watches Moana once: *decks herself in every shiny piece of jewelry and piece of shiny clothing Zelda and herself own* WELL TAMATOA HASN'T ALWAYS BEEN THIS GLAAAAM!
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Prudence: So which one of you is the immature idiot that the other suffers for?
Zelda: Don't call Lilith an idiot.
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*Lilith dresses up in a 1910 nanny's getup (like Mary Poppins/Missy)*
Zelda: You look like Mary Poppins.
Lilith: is she cool?
Zelda: Yeah, she's cool.
Lilith: I'M MARY POPPINS, Y'ALL.
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Zelda, happily: I married a child.
Hilda: Child? I thought you married Lilith- oh.
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