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dark-and-kinky-hetalia-scenarios · 1 year

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2p Germany/Lutz Beilschmidt

“Dude wtf why”

he knows he’s bad but like, he doesn’t feel like he’s that bad, yeah he’s sex obsessed and a manipulative and violent yandere, but like he’s “why the fuck are you throwing me into hell before time?!”

Of course he’s going to hell no matter what, he knows that, but not this early

He’s going to hate it so much, he really isn’t as equipped for this as one might think, unless we are talking about the hell from Dante’s inferno, because then he will be chilling in the second circle (aka the circle of lust) with all those hot people, so like if that’s how hell works, maybe don’t put him there, even if the wind is annoying

2p Italy/Luciano Vargas

This guy is so fucking pissed you won’t believe it, he’ll be yelling and swearing for what feels like hours

He’d probably end up in the second circle or the seventh circle of hell (violence where people boil in a river of blood and fire) since he’s a violent little shit, not to mention super sexist

yeah, he deserves to be in hell, especially after the way he treated you, but he doesn’t think he’s in the wrong, he thinks society is, and he will try his best to escape, which will be hard when a lot of the people he has killed are also in hell, just waiting to beat the shit out of him

2p Japan/Kuro Honda

He’s angry of course, how dare you do this to your master

To be fair he has experienced enough hell on earth to not be THAT impressed or scared, well unless you bring back childhood memories, because then he will be furious (let’s just say his childhood was VERY fucked up, and that’s putting it mildly)

You can’t really do anything worse to him than what he has already experienced so although he will hate being in hell, he will slowly be brewing a plan to kill you or trap you in hell forever.

Also the second circle of hell but for fun either the fifth (wrath where people beat the shit out of each other underwater) or the seventh.

2p Scotland/Garvin Kirkland

He’s terrified, usually he’s like, i can do worse than you and now that you’ve literally dragged him to hell he’s seriously reconsidering who’s the bigger sadist,

And as he’s not a masochist he hates being in hell, he’s not all about receiving the pain and punishment

He should probably also serve time in the seventh circle of hell, he’s good at hiding his violence, at first at least. But he will also blame you for it all, if he had known about all this he might have gotten the fuck away from you

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 29 days

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Don't Wormy About Me.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #jiang cheng #wei wuxian #yu ziyuan #Please allow me to make it clear how important I think the hug between YZY and JC is in regards to several aspects of their characters #For one - it is the resolution and reveal that behind all the harsh words and bitterness...She really did love her son.#A hug is a soft gesture that you would never expect from someone like YZY and the fact she shows JC this affection now -#-Tells us how she knows that this upcoming battle is a death sentence for her.#Her giving away Zidan is honestly overkill but another sign of her truly showing him how she loves him and wants him to survive.#The dread of knowing she's walking back to a fight without zidian and trying to keep up brave face one last time...chilling.#Zidian represents legacy and promises. And this is going to both save and destroy Jiang Cheng as he carries this weight alone.#Heartbreaking stuff! Didn't draw it in the comic because I wanted to draw a silly worm on a string!#WWX tried to help JC out of the knot but got stuck in it.#Those worm on a string tricks are harder than they look!#Also; it's been about a year since the last boat joke - but indeed this is the 11th boat of pd-mdzs. No need to do the math.

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starry-bi-sky · 1 month

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i need to get this out of my head before i continue clone^2 but danny being the first batkid. Like, standard procedure stuff: his parents and sister die, danny ends up with Vlad Masters. He drags him along to stereotypical galas and stuff; Danny is not having a good time.

He ends up going to one of the Wayne Galas being hosted ever since elusive Bruce Wayne has returned to Gotham. Vlad is crowing about having this opportunity as he's been wanting to sink his claws into the company for a long while now. Danny is too busy grieving to care what he wants.

And like most Galas, once Vlad is done showing him off to the other socialites and the like, he disappears. Off to a dark corner, or to one of the many balconies; doesn't matter. There he runs into said star of the show, Bruce who is still young, has been Batman for at least a year at this point, but still getting used to all these damn people and socializing. He's stepped off to hide for a few minutes before stepping back into the shark tank.

And he runs into a kid with circles under his eyes and a dull gleam in them. Familiar, like looking into a mirror.

Danny tries to excuse himself, he hasn't stopped crying since his parents died and it's been months. He rubs his eyes and stands up, and stumbles over a half-hearted apology to Mister Wayne. Some of Vlad's etiquette lessons kicking in.

Bruce is awkward, but he softens. "That's alright, lad," he says, pulling up some of that Brucie Wayne confidence, "I was just coming out here to get some fresh air."

There's a little pressing; Bruce asks who he's here with, Danny says, voice quiet and grief-stricken, that he's with his godfather Vlad Masters. Bruce asks him if he knows where he is, and Danny tells him he does. Bruce offers to leave, Danny tells him to do whatever he wants.

It ends with Bruce staying, standing off to the side with Danny in silence. Neither of them say a word, and Danny eventually leaves first in that same silence.

Bruce looks into Vlad Masters after everything is over, his interest piqued. He finds news about him taking in Danny Fenton: he looks into Danny Fenton. He finds news articles about his parents' deaths, their occupations, everything he can get his hands on.

At the next gala, he sees Danny again. And he looks the same as ever: quiet like a ghost, just as pale, and full of grief. Bruce sits in silence with him again for nearly ten minutes before he strikes a conversation.

"Do you like to do anything?"

Nothing. Just silence.

Bruce isn't quite sure what to do: comfort is not his forte, and Danny doesn't know him. He's smart enough to know that. So he starts talking about other things; anything he can think of that Brucie Wayne might say, that also wasn't inappropriate for a kid to hear.

Danny says nothing the entire time, and is again the first to leave.

Bruce watches from a distance as he intercts with Vlad Masters; how Vlad Masters interacts with him. He doesn't like what he sees: Vlad Masters keeps a hand on Danny's shoulder like one would hold onto the collar of a dog. He parades him around like a trophy he won.

And there are moments, when someone gets too close or when someone tries to shake Danny's hand, of deep possessiveness that flints over Vlad Masters' eyes. Like a dragon guarding a horde.

He plays the act of doting godfather well: but Bruce knows a liar when he sees one. Like recognizes like.

Danny is dull-eyed and blank faced the entire time; he looks miserable.

So Bruce tries to host more parties; if only so that he can talk to Danny alone. Vlad seems all too happy to attend, toting Danny along like a ribbon, and on the dot every hour, Danny slips away to somewhere to hide. Bruce appears twenty minutes later.

"I was looking into your godfather's company," he says one night, trying to think of more things to say. Some nights all they do is sit in silence. "Some of my shareholders were thinking of partnering up--"

"Don't."

He stops. Danny hardly says a word to him, he doesn't even look at him -- he's sitting on the ground, his head in his knees. Like he's trying to hide from the world. But he's looking, blue eyes piercing up at Bruce.

Bruce tilts his head, practiced puppy-like. "Pardon?"

"Don't." Danny says, strongly. "Don't make any deals with Vlad."

It's the most words Danny's spoken to him, and there's a look in his eyes like a candle finding its spark. Something hard. Bruce presses further, "And why is that?"

The spark flutters, and flushes out. Danny blinks like he's coming out of a trance, and slumps back into himself. "Just don't."

Bruce stares at him, thoughtful, before looking away. "Alright. I won't."

And they fall back into silence.

Danny, when he leaves, turns to look at Bruce, "I mean it." He says; soft like he's telling a secret, "Don't make any deals with him. Don't be alone with him. Don't work with him."

He's scampered away before Bruce can question him further.

(He never planned on working with Vlad Masters and his company; he's done his research. He's seen the misfortune. But nothing ever leads back to him. There's no evidence of anything. But Danny knows something.)

At their next meeting, Danny starts the conversation. It's new, and it's welcomed. He says, cutting through their five minute quiet, that he likes stars. And he doesn't like that he can't see them in Gotham.

Bruce hums in interest, and Danny continues talking. It's as if floodgates had been opened, and as Bruce takes a sip of his wine, it tastes like victory.

("Tucker told me once--") ("Tucker?") ("Oh-- uh, one of my best friends. He's a tech geek. We haven't talked in a while.")

(Danny shut down in his grief -- his friends are worried, but can't reach him. When he goes back to the manor with Vlad, he fishes out his phone and sends them a message.)

(They are ecstatic to hear from him.)

It all culminates until one day, when Danny is leaving to go back inside, that Bruce speaks up. "You know," He says, leaning against the railing. "The manor has many rooms; plenty of space for a guest."

The implication there, hidden between the lines. And Danny is smart, he looks at Bruce with a sharp glean in his eyes, and he nods. "Good to know."

The next time they see each other, Danny has something in his hands. "Can you hold onto something for me?" He asks.

When Bruce agrees, Danny places a pearl into his palm. or, at least, it's something that looks like a pearl. Because it's cold to the touch; sinking into Bruce's white silk gloves with ease and shimmering like an opal. It moves a little as it settles into his hand, and the moves like its full of liquid.

Bruce has never seen anything like it before, but he does know this; it's not human. "What is it?" He asks, and Danny looks uncomfortable.

"I can't tell you that." He says, shifting on his foot like he's scared of someone seeing it. "But please be careful with it. Treat it like it's extremely fragile."

When Bruce gets home, he puts it in an empty ring box and hides the box in the cave. He tries researching into what it is. he can't find anything concrete.

Everything comes to a head one day when Danny appears at the manor's doorstep one evening, soaking wet in the rain, and bleeding from the side.

#dpxdc #dp x dc #danny fenton is not the ghost king #dpxdc crossover #dpdc #dp x dc crossover #dpxdc prompt #man i just really need more dpdc stuff where danny and bruce have a good relationship. like man i NEED it. like i need to see these two #bonding together. and not in a cracky 'oh danny is a distant friend/cousin/etc' stuff but like. active participants in each other's lives #or as active as can be in this case. i neeeeed these two getting along and caring about one another #this idea came to me like last night and hasn't left since nd it was driving me up the wall to think about both positively and negatively b #i neeeded someone to hear about this or i was gonna implode #danny is the first son #tried to just get the general gist of the idea down but i definitely thought of the idea that bruce lowkey suspects vlad for having a hand #Vlad allows Danny to sneak off because he thinks Danny is alone. if he knew Bruce was there he'd be piiisssed and would put a stop to it #Sam and Tucker are alive they just got ghosted for a bit by danny bc he was in Major Grief and didn't wanna socialize. He couldn't go to #them because he didn't wanna put them in danger via Vlad.#oh that thing he handed Bruce? Yeah that's his ghost core. I have a headcanon (that isnt always applied) that ghosts can take their cores #out of their bodies at will and painlessly and without issue. and its common practice actually to do so bc they can be a not insignificant #distance away from said core before problems start to act up. and its common for ghosts to leave their physical cores at their lairs for #safekeeping because as long as the physical core is fine: so is the ghost. they can reform if their body gets destroyed. it also acts as a #fast travel sometimes. where they can reform at their core in an instant. its not inspired in the slightest by SU but i do see the overlap #most cores are pretty small for safety sake: its harder to hit if its small. and they're pr resilient too but its better to be safe than #sorry. so yeah. danny essentially gave bruce the physical embodiment of his soul and indirectly said #'if anything happens to me at least i'll be safe with you'#danny doesn't know he's batman btw #starry rambles.#was gonna go into danny becoming a vigilante beside bruce but im sleeeepy so i'll do that in a reblog. he's gonna go by nightingale if #anyone is interested. stereotypical but to be frank it is a *good* name imo. has a good amount of syllables and consonants to it #and the bird theme. and since its part of an ancestral name it has even more backing for it being bird-y without being meta

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cephalonheadquarters · 3 months

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gamer den vs r/malelivingspace (diesel and chamelo's rooms)

#I thiught the contrast was funny. I am not very good at drawinf rooms though sorry #I woulda made diesel room messier but i hate drawing #Also chamelos looks worse in terms of like. art Bceause i did his first and then tried harder on diesel's room #Also they dont live together idk if this even implied that #Diesel lives alone and Chamelo lives with Mark #Do i even maintag this idc. hi #splatoon #splatoon oc #oc #diesel fintasma #chamelo fláje #my art

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sensitivedead · 2 months

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#shutup sensitive #i feel so alone #and i dont like telling those around me how i feel bc their reactions make me feel even worse #so ive always bottled it up and distracted myself #im finding it harder and harder to stay distracted #i feel at lost #i know i have those around me that care about me but at what lengths and is it real bc it doesnt feel real #i hate being alone #and they just dont understand how i could possibly feel this way which adds to my secrecy and desire to keep it to myself like i dont have #anything to do. i have tried i have they just think im strong or something but they are wrong and i told them

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osmanthus-dandelion-wine · 2 years

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genuinely shocked at the amount of people that think character death = good story. In most circumstances, character deaths seem like an easy way out for shock value rather than meaningful development (Signora for example). Some of the best character arcs are those where the writers had to figure out how to develop the character in the arc of the story rather than just killing them and moving on

#genshin impact #genshin impact spoilers #xiao #la signora #criticism #hyv has done good jobs when a character had to die and it was a satisfying end to their arcs (himeko or otto more recently)#and they flubbed it before with signora #the whole point of the quest was for xiao to shake this mindset of a warrior's death and that he has to be alone and die alone #that is exactly why yelan was there to challenge that point since she hates the idea of self sacrifice and being the only one to survive #both suffered survivor's guilt and had two completely different ways they went about coping #and the end of that quest was genuinely one of the only times xiao did not degrade himself as a slaughterer #and he was proud to be a yaksha #because his duty was to protect the people #so why set all that up for him to die #it would have been sadder but after a while you'd think 'that made no sense'#ffs he didn't want to die either he tried to bring a rock to make bosacius' shrine #idk i guess getting older just made me see how much harder it is for writers to write development than killing the character off #and another series did initially kill their character off and it was not satisfying #so when they redux their game and had that character finish their arc what do you know they had one of the best character arcs

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the1trueanon · 16 days

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man, very few things make you feel more useless and unaccomplished than trying to apply for scholarships TnT

#seriously #they ask for so fucking much #and then make you feel crazy for not having done like 90% of it #youre supposed to have done community service and gotten perfect grades and be poor as hell and have an active hand in literally everything #be friends with everyone and personally know a dozen authority figures and have hours and hours to write and film and edit and make project #no wonder theres thousand and thousands of scholarship dollars that go unclaimed yearly #NONE OF US CAN FUCKING MEET THE ASININE REQUIREMENTS #its even harder when youve taken so much time between school #ive counted at least 5 scholarships that ive tried to apply for that require a MINIMUM of 2 recommendation letters IN THIS PAST MONTH ALONE #DO YOU GUYS THINK IM IN CONTACT WITH THESE PEOPLE??#THIS LATE AFTER MY GRADUATION??#dear lord #literally so stressful #i feel like useless trash TnT #anyway back to my suffering #anon rants #school stuff #tw rant #tw rant in tags #anon rambles in the tags

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craycraybluejay · 2 months

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i saw my therapist and it was so amazing and then i got immediately un-therapized by a horrible person

#literally whats the point of therapy if im getting harassed and put in a bad mood all the damn time #like. i was so happy there and then.. gone #but im just gonna think about it harder and how nice it was and just how understood and seen she makes me feel #she is the kindest human being ever. ever. just the kindest #and i want to carry that kindness instead of all this misery people keep trying to shove onto me #you know what!#brick walling it! your shitty behaviour will not continue to bring me down!#you are a bad person and im glad you got yourself worked up over literally nothing!#enough to pick a fight with me and then get even more insane and threatening when after ignoring you for awhile i took the bait!#i gave you! every opportunity! to shut up and leave me alone with your nonsense!#i tried to set a boundary and you kept pushing. so no im not gonna let your horrible attitude make me sad for the rest of the night #you deserved to be reminded that youre a bad person even though youll continue blaming everyone but yourself #for what by all means you did #no one forced you to do it.#even my therapist who is supposed to be impartial sees how ridiculous you are #everyone around you sees it. you are a pathetic laughingstock and you dont deserve space in my head #i just wish it was Easier to ignore the constant barrage of madness #i wish i felt more stoic and put together than i present myself #and i wish you would shut the fuck up and leave me alone

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crowhyun · 1 year

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Life Update:

I’ve just graduated from flight attendant training, and I’ve earned my wings yall! I have about a week before I start inflight training and that’ll last about four days, and then i have another two-day training course, but as of now, I’m pretty much a fully certified flight attendant!

I’ve also finally found a place to live once I get to my base, as I was worrying about that a lot lol but things are going great.

I’m just a bit sad, because even though I felt like shit most of the time getting up so early and going to school for 10-12 hours a day, it was really fun, and I already miss seeing my classmates and talking to them everyday. We started out with 22 and ended up with 17, but it was still a big class compared to a lot of other graduating classes lol. Some of my classmates have already went on to their scheduled inflight training, and I’ll be the last one to go lol bcs mine is scheduled for the 26th, and four ppl have left already so I’m sad. My roommate is leaving tomorrow, though, and tbh I’m not sad abt that, I’ll be along in the hotel room for 4 days before I leave lol.

But yeah, I just wanted to tell y’all what’s going on. I’m finally going to get back to writing a bit for the free time I have while here, but I’m not sure if i’m going to post any works yet.

#i’ve also been feeling a bit lonely #although i’ve become friends with my classmates we aren’t rlly friends #idk how to explain #but you know how there are ppl you can talk to when you see them and have a nice convo #but y’all aren’t that close #it’s smth like that #i want to be close but none of them ever invite me out or voluntarily talk to me like they do others #everyone has their ‘best friend’ but me #and a lot of the time i’m alone #i’ve tried rlly hard to be extroverted and happy and smiley #and just a person that is easily approachable #but i guess i have to try harder #when we’re we talking about first impressions #a lot of #people said that i seemed rlly standoffish and shy at first #and like damn #i put on a whole new persona coming here and it’s still not good enough lol #idk what to do abt that tbh #i just wish ppl would treat me like they treat everyone else #this got mad depressing lmao

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ofpd · 1 year

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having mutuals will make you do crazy things like read a book in the tanakh bc "it's grantairecore"

#no i should read it anyway it's just that last time i tried i didnt get anything from it like idr what its abt #and like. reading the tanakh is such a lame activity to do alone. it's so much harder to learn that way. but for now.#txt #this does in fact seem like important research for the fic i will never write

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cr0wc0rpse · 1 year

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Wanting to make friends is so hard when you don’t interact w people and don’t know how or how to stay engaged when starting to talk and you feel weird about trying to initially reach out

#this post brought to you by me needing to make more friends. especially people I can see in person #making friends at school is hard because I like. barely talk to people in class. let alone outside of class #and don’t really go to events/activities and when I do I don’t stay in contact w anyone #so I don’t have anyone to try talking with semi consistently in an attempt at friendship #like. there are some people I’m friendly with and that’s good but we don’t really talk outside of class #and the one person I have tried (and it’s not going well because I am not consistent) to talk to more I don’t see often #maybe I need to try harder. but I don’t know how to do that. I’m not good at making friends #dead text

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mishkakagehishka · 9 months

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And i know when i return i'll either be yelled at or laughed off like little girl throws tantrum or whatever. But i'm genuinely getting real sick of the way i'm treated vs the way my brother is treated. And they don't even notice that shit. I tell my mom "you never take my side and defend me, when i caved and let you take me to get my eyebrows threaded, you said nothing when my brother said i 'finally look like a human being'" and surprise surprise she "doesn't remember that", he "doesn't remember that", but it cut soooo deep into me, i'll never forget it. Whatever tho.

#you know i kept getting scolded bc of how not-independent i am #i was told i'd never be able to live alone bc i can't clean and cook perfectly #and i was told i never helped around the house (i did. a lot.)#when i moved they were all surprised how well i was doing as if they never saw me do chores #my brother on the other hand can't cook nor clean #i do everything and that's totally normal to them. they had no worries ab him #it's only now that i keep crying bc he makes everything harder for me that my mother is upset #not for me!!! but for his ''future wife''#what about your fucking daughter. you've got some high hopes of having a daughter-in-law with the way he is anyway #she always acts surprised and horrified at the fact that i'm self-conscious and refuse to leave the house if i don't look perfect #and she's the one who kept pushing all these beauty standards on me #whenever i'd fucking look to her BEGGING for her to be on my side and defend me for once against my brother and dad's cruel comments #she's the one who was the most aggressive about it #she told me i need to be more assertive and stand up for myself as if every single time i tried standing up for myself #i wasn't called šjora štufa or spoilt or selfish or ungrateful or told to shut up otherwise #the ones who raised me to be like that now find fault in it and BLAME ME

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fakeoutbf · 10 months

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#hi i’m gonna ramble a little feel free to skip over this #i’ve just felt so lonely these past few weeks #like the closest friends i had both went out of town and neither told me and i had to find out through instagram #and like idk if it’s my fault for always being so closed off and not reaching out to ppl more or if they just … don’t wanna talk to me #and i’m happy that they’re doing stuff that makes them happy and that they’re doing well but like #they both have bfs which is fine but that means that they almost automatically have someone else to do shit with #and they have closer friends too so they hang out with them more i guess #all this to say i don’t really have anyone i’m close with so i just … don’t have anyone to do that stuff with #like a coworker was saying they wanted to go to the beach with their cousins or siblings or they went on vacation with friends recently #and the only person i’d wanna do those things with is my mom … and then we can’t go bc we’re broke and have other things to pay #and i wish i could travel on my own but it’s not safe here and ngl i don’t have money to go out of the country besides needing paperwork etc #all this to say that: did i fuck up choosing a bsf in hs that was thousands of miles away that now i don’t have a genuine connection with #anyone in the same area i am?? should i have opened up more to ppl overall?? should i have tried harder??#or is it just fucked up that the only ppl i know who like the same things i like and who bond with me over them live so far away??#like is it me?? am i the problem??#i just wanna go to the beach man … i wanna go on vacation and relax and not think about fucking dying alone #no one even cares about me i swear #if i got fucked up in a car crash or something and landed in a hospital or fucking dead for all i know who would even care

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thedreadvampy · 2 years

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glad that Jay is around to help me with planning my Please Diagnose Me pitch bc when we ask 'how is this negatively affecting your life' I'm like hm. can't open jars bc my fingers come out of joint. can't have sex without my hip dislocating. it's fairly inconvenient that all shoes make my feet bleed and I can't brush my teeth without tearing up my gums.

and they're like. yes these are all good points you should mention. have you considered that Being In Constant Pain is also an effect it has on your life?

yeah. hadn't thought of that cause it doesn't actually stop me doing things most of the time. but now that you point it out, that is only bc I'm incredibly stubborn and don't take care of myself. so yeah.

they very astutely pointed out that a major part of lifelong disability is that you develop a lot of coping strategies to the point that you kind of don't notice that some things are affecting you bc you've found ways around them that mean you can still do the things you're trying to do. but that doesn't mean that they're not affecting you or that a doctor is not going to want to hear about them.

it's really easy to normalise stuff is the thing. like as per my bio I refer to myself as 'slightly disabled' a lot bc I am still. broadly speaking. capable of doing most things. it's just that it's often painful/exhausting, I need a lot of workarounds, and I can't sustain it long term.

but the thing is that uhhhhhhh that's only """slightly disabled"""" if I assume other people are also struggling with those things but maybe slightly less.

one of the revelatory things about having these conversations is how much I'm finding that many people don't even have a slight manifestation of these issues.

like it doesn't hurt people's hands At All trying to open a stiff jar lid or clap or pick something up at a slightly wrong angle. other people Aren't In Pain unless something's actually wrong. to most people 'my feet hurt after a 10 hr standing shift' doesn't mean 'my feet and legs physically will not take my weight for 48 hours after a 10 hr standing shift'. some people's feet just never bleed at all unless their shoes are WILDLY the wrong size. when most people say 'I'm tired' they mean 'I'm ready to take a break' not 'I feel whole-body sick and it's a painful struggle to string a whole thought together and I will feel unbearably ill if I move or open my eyes.'

like there's a lot of situations where I only register as Problems the things that I legitimately can't work around or ignore. like I started using a cane bc I was uncontrollably falling in the street bc my knees and ankles would just give way without warning. but now I have the cane so I've stopped noticing that - my legs still sometimes abruptly lose integrity but I can catch myself with the stick so I no longer fall (except occasionally when I trip myself up or I'm wearing inappropriately high shoes that make an ankle slippage harder to correct for) so I don't. consider it a thing that greatly affects my life. but like. it is, right? it's a thing I have to account for that other people don't. idk. it's all very interesting.

#red said #disability #also you know. I'm 29 and still just now realising that stuff that's affected me since i was 6 or 7 at most is Actually An Issue #so idk that's also interesting #bc none of this is new #i don't generally notice New Symptoms i notice that Other People Don't Have This Thing #or sometimes i try and do something I've not done much before and go 'huh. that's a problem.'#like i always had trouble with pain and instability in my legs and feet on long cafe shifts #but as a teenager i did 1-2 8hr shifts a week which knackered me but was manageable #and at 21 i tried to hold down a job doing 5 10-12 hr shifts a week and it fucking destroyed me #literally. i would spend all the time i wasn't at work in bed bc i was in so much pain #i missed a bunch of shifts bc i wasn't physically able to walk two streets to work let alone actually do a shift #like i called in stock several times bc the pain was so bad it took me like an hour to get from the kitchen to the bathroom #*sick #and obviously i got fired within a month #but like. that was the first time i registered that this was harder for me to do than other people.#even though I'd had a similar job with similar physical strains for i think 5 years as a Saturday job?#bc it has to get to the intensity that you CAN'T just work through it in order to register as a limitation. at least for me.#bc i naturally just assume that everyone feels some degree of this shitty and they're just hiding it better than me #bc I'm trying to hide it and get on with things! don't want to be a whiner!#so it's only when it gets to the point that no amount of willpower will make it hideable that you notice that nobody else has it at all #bc you will say to someone 'i am experiencing The Suffering very strongly today you know we've all been there haha'#and they'll be like 'what's The Suffering? that sounds like you have a serious medical condition'#and I'm like 'no dude no I'm not explaining it well. you know the Suffering? the Suffering that we all get #as a natural consequence of this everyday task? well I'm being a bit pathetic about it today so i can't move and it hurts to breathe'#and they're like 'no i literally have never heard of the Suffering'#shocked pikachu emoji

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