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therealjackdsaf · 3 months

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✎_ _ⅈꪀ𝕥𝕣ꪮ ρꪮડ𝕥! ▓▒░

ೃ⁀➷,, Hi! My names are Jack, Sally, Alastor, William, Ruv, Yakko, Pinky, Roachy, and Dan!

ೃ⁀➷,, I use they, it, flesh, uncanny, button, red, tape, eye, corpse, blood, church, stare, neon, maim, scar, razor, frog, war, void, radio, scary, love, lover, heart, spring, bunny, snow, toon, hate, cannibal, gore, and a few others that I probably forgot as my pronouns/neos!

ೃ⁀➷,, My fandoms are dsaf, fnaf, undertale, deltarune, tspud/tsp, tf2, omori, fnf, and several others that I don't remember.

ೃ⁀➷,, I have d.i.d, depression, anxiety, and autism so there's that.

ೃ⁀➷,, I'm trans/nonbinary!

ೃ⁀➷,, I like to roleplay!! Shoot me an ask or a message if you wanna!! :3

ೃ⁀➷,, I'm a very skrunkly guy >:]

DNI + Other under the cut

DO NOT INTERACT IF:

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Basic DNI criteria.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Your name is J*sper or R*ven. (a, a)

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ You ship d*vesport, st*narrator, he*vymedic, or anonyone x omori. (a, a, a)

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ You're a huge homestuck fan.

ASK TO INTERACT IF:

⟼:;ೃ You're a Henry Miller kin.

⟼:;ೃ You're prone to lying.

⟼:;ೃ You're a cis girl (just message me and tell me).

OKAY TO INTERACT IF:

⤹⤻⟹ Don't meet the DNI criteria.

⤹⤻⟹ You like any of my fandoms!

⤹⤻⟹ You use neos, have autism, like frosties, or some combination of the 3.

⤹⤻⟹ You think Monster from Friday Night Funkin is hot. (you're right)

That's all! G'byee~~~

SIDEBLOGS:

@. 1-adult-in-a-t-shirt

@. theradiodoctor

@. rainbow-bastards-are-back

@. jacks-self-ship-blog

@. cutseypasta

@. amanwithagreatplan

@. the-fruity-text-doctor-owo

@. the-game-doc

WEIRD CULT VERSION OF ME AND MY MOOT:

@the-house-of-garf

ALTER INDICATORS/ALTER INTRODUCTION:

🍊 - hi, my name's Jack, uhh my favorite color is orange and me and dave are best friends

🍆 - HI MY NAME IS DAVEY OR DAVE OR PURRPEL FUCK FACE I LIKE PURELPE AND SPORTSY <3

📕 - Hello, I'm Dr. Henry Miller. I'd say it's a pleasure, but it's rude to lie.

☎ - Uhhh, hello? Hello, hello! Uh, my name is Steven, or Mr. Stevenson, um, you can call me either if you want, uh, that's it I think.

🟢 - h1 1'm g1ng1 do you guys l1ke green 1'm green sorry what

💀 - Hello! My name is Jack! It's nice to meet you all!

🔪 - I refuse to introduce myself here, this is stupid.

🧪 - Hallo! Call me Doctor <3

🔥 - do yiu lakie ucniconrs oar fire??/? o srory my naem is pyro :3

🛠 - Howdy, call me Engineer :).

🌾 - HI my name's C i like men and women also women are cool

❤ - Hello!! I don't know wh7 we're introducing ourselves. I’m Tord!

🥃 - hi im clay

🏐 - Hello! My name is Danielle. Not Daniel, people get that confused a lot.

🕰 - Ah, hello! I'm The Narrator. It's a pleasure to meet you!

1⃣ - H1111 MY NAME 1S 1, L1KE THE NUMBER.

<35⃣ - Heey <3 My name i5 5, the number <3

6⃣ - H6llo. My nam6 is 6. Th6 numb6r.

🌈 - uhh hi zmiley face my name iz cypher itz cool to meet you

🕴 - My name is Salem also 8=====D

💜 - Greetings. My name is William afton. It's nice to meet you all!

🎸 - 👋 👆🟣🐰

🎧 - Ah, Hi! My Name's Charles. Nice To Meet You Guys :D

💻 - I’m AM. This is stupid, im never here.

♡ - Helo, my name's Peter

👁 - *hello. also hi it's doe <o>

📐 - h37 m7 n^m3 1s tr1^ng|3 1t's d#mb 1 kn0w b#t 1t's m7 n^m3

👐 - ☟︎☜︎☹︎☹︎⚐︎📬︎ 💣︎✡︎ ☠︎✌︎💣︎☜︎ ✋︎💧︎ 👎︎⚐︎👍︎❄︎⚐︎☼︎ 🕈︎✋︎☠︎☝︎👎︎✋︎☠︎☝︎💧︎ ☝︎✌︎💧︎❄︎☜︎☼︎📬︎ ✋︎❄︎ ✋︎💧︎ ☠︎✋︎👍︎☜︎ ❄︎⚐︎ 💣︎☜︎☜︎❄︎ ✡︎⚐︎🕆︎📬︎

🍎 - Hello. My name is Nightmare. Please call me Night. I don't like being called Nightmare.

🌹 - sup, the name's red. funny skeleton alcoholic.

🥀 - HELLO. MY NAME IS DREARY :)

🤕 - hi. im omori. i dont really want to do this. im sorry.

🐻 - Hello. Please call me Ruv.

🔫 - i legally changed my name to captain johnson

🍋 - Hello!! I'm Monster :] Call me Lemon, please.

🩻 - I don't really want to make this. but i have no choice, My name is tabi,

💒 - Hello! My name is Sarvente! It's nice to meet you! - 💒

🐷 - i'm THE BLADE from MINECRAFT. english major baybyyyy

🍺 - The official Floridaman. It's Graystillplays.

Hi!!! My name is Grelle. I've been DYING to meet you ❤️

Hello, my name is Ciel. I'm excited to meet you all.

📻 - Hello, my dears! It really is quite a pleasure, but I'm not a fan of the Internet, so don't expect to see me around that much. You may call me Alastor if I ever am here!

🎙 - umm hi :p i might be around sometimes idk lol im 2p btw

🦉 - Hello!! I'm Stolas! It's nice to meet you

🧹 - HII im niffty!!! :3 nice to meet you all :D

🛗 - Hey, just call me Protag please.

🛗 - Hi! I’m Brad Tanner, don’t forget it! Coworker is chill too.

🍞 - call me vince please!! he/they coffee/toast prns

🥩 - Vincent.

Hi, I’m Sally. I’d prefer not to use the emojis.

🗒️ - Hello. I am L.

Stu Macher! - Stu 🤍

a comment left by my online papa under a post about a transphobe claiming they’re not transphobic

#intro post #blog intro #system intro #alter intro

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moonchild-in-blue · 6 months

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🎃 Trick or Treat 🍬

Face your destiny:

👻 Trick! - Oh no! Your costume scared Boonf, the knitting ghost, and made them drop their ball of yarn. They were knitting you a scarf, but now you must face the cold unprotected :/ 🧶🧣 (it's okay, Boonf still loves you)

🍬 Treat~ - What a beautiful smile - and pleasant smell! My my, someone has been using their special Tutti-Frutti Summer Blast Extravaganza scented shampoo! Here, have a nice leaf 🤲☘️

🦇 Trock - Ruh-oh, someone ate too much garlic bread at the Halloween function. Robert Battison, the vampire bat, does not aprove. He squirts you with pickle juice, for 5+ emotional damage. 🥒🔫

🍭 Treat? Treat! - There's a little sadness in your eyes. The cold is trying to get to you, but your soul persists. It's okay, we'll get through this together, friend! Have a warm drink and a forehead kissie. 🍵😚

💀 T R I C K - Jonnie Bone Jovi, the thespian skeleton, put on a one-skelleton show for you, but you laughed during her Super Serious rib-xylophone solo. *bonk* you get (gently) hit with a femur. 🦴🎶

🍫 treat treat treat ⁽ᵗʳᵉᵃᵗ ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ⁾ - AH, yes, you're here for the sweets, are you not? Here you go, this year has been hard enough, have as many as you'd like (but leave one out for Mr. Jack o'Lantern, so he may bless you with his pumpkin kiss). 🍬🥚🍭🍪🥜🍫

🧟 Trick ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) - You're one of them monster fuckers, right? Yeah, I can see you. You probably really want a trick, don't ya? A silly little "prank". Tsk, tsk. Okay, fine. You may follow the masked individual looming ominously in the shadows - he'll know what to do. 😈🔪

🎃 Treeet - Well, someone's excited for Halloween! Your pumpkin-spiced aura is positively glowing. Here you go, have some a caramel apple and come see my friends Jen & Berry perform a spooky song. 🐌🎺🦔🪕

#i hope you have fun with this!!#happy halloween everyone #pls share with others!#halloween #happy halloween #polls #tumblr polls #my polls

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hnychn · 3 years

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KARASUNO’S MANAGER !!

SYPNOSIS — it’s a new year and the karasuno team decides to throw a new years party in the school gym

WARNINGS — tooth rotting fluff <3

AUTHOR’S NOTE — none of this is realistic but shut up and let me live laugh and love with the idea it’s real

⇀ HAPPY NEW YEARS BABESS

⇀ so it all started out when noya and tanaka came up with the brilliant idea to throw a new years party

⇀ and since canonically, everyone in haikyuu are losers, everyone agreed 😀

⇀ of course you invited your boo kenma 😼 and the nekoma team

⇀ and kuroo invited the fukurodani team since bokuto heard about the party somehow

⇀ the party is held in the gym, it's byoc

⇀ "bring your own cups"

⇀ cause y'all broke broke 😭😭✋🏼

⇀ kidding . . . about the cup part, y'all are broke though . . .

⇀ anyways, so the team put you in charge of getting the drinks

⇀ . . . but they never specified non-alcoholic 😼

⇀ so you, being the six foot seven giant you were, got some alcohol

⇀ it was surprisingly easy

⇀ like the guy behind the counter didn't even ask you for an ID or anything and he probably assumed you were 21+ because of your features 🤡

⇀ i mean you do be chiselled by the gods themselves 🤪🥴

⇀ not me simping over you 🤺

⇀ so the party is about to start and you come in with literal bottle of alcohol like fUCKING JACK DANIEL'S AND WHISKEY AND RUM AND ALL THAT SHIT

⇀ and when daichi saw you with all the paper bags filled with bottles of alcohol he just-

⇀ . . . 🧍🏽‍♀️

⇀ "y/n. . ."

⇀ "yes? 🤠"

⇀ "why. . .why do you have alcohol?"

⇀ "you said to get drinks. ."

⇀ "i mEANT PUNCH-"

⇀ all daichi wanted to do was punch you 🏌️🏽‍♀️

⇀ LMAO BUT NOYA AND TANAKA TURNT UP WITH THE ALCOHOL

⇀ they poured that shit into those punch bowls? ya know? the ones in those cliche highschool movies

⇀ they got red solo cups and everything 🔫

⇀ anyways, so people start showing up and daichi panics because no sir, these minors aren't getting drink on his watch, but oops-

⇀ kiyoko locked him in the shortage closet 👁

⇀ "i'll let you out in 20 minutes"

⇀ because babes knew that's all it'll take for everyone to be blackout drunk

⇀ and she was right 💅🏽

⇀ fifteen minutes into the party, noya, tanaka, yamamoto, lev and a bunch of first years are drunk drunk.

⇀ suga, kuroo, asahi, and ennoshita are also drunk but like they're the chill typa drunk y'know?

⇀ they playing a game of uno with normal playing cards 🧍🏽‍♀️

⇀ kenma . . . doesn't want to be there BLESS HIM LMAO-

⇀ he's sitting in the corner, red solo cup in hand because kuroo took his pspspsp and won't give it back, even if he is drunk

⇀ and you- good god

⇀ YOU. ARE. D R U N K.

⇀ i'm talking the embarrassing type of drunk

⇀ you're dancing on one of the volleyball poles like a fucking stripper and bokuto is throwing napkins at you like they're ones please- 🔫

⇀ kenma is just in the corner staring like 🐚🌝 hello yes, officer? imma need animal control here asap.

⇀ LIKE DJFJD WTF IS MY BF DOINGG

⇀ he's embarrassed for you 😔✋🏼

⇀ but in the corner of your eye you see kenma sitting all alone so you go over to him, alcohol nearly spilling over the side of your red solo cup

⇀ "what're you doin all alone here, kitten?"

⇀ kenma crinkles his nose because you smell like alcohol, but he just shrugs

⇀ he says something but you can't hear him over he loud music, so you lean closer but you end up spilling your drink all over your shirt and you just

⇀ "ew it's sticky . . . i guess I'll just take it off"

⇀ SO YOU DO

⇀ IN A CROWDED ROOM

⇀ OF DRUNK POSSIBLY NOT STRAIGHT MEN

⇀ and holy fuck-

⇀ how knew you were so foine 🥴🥴

kenma's eyes widen when you suddenly pull off your shirt, your chest still slightly damp from the drink spilling on you. he could feel heat rushing to his face the longer he stared. kenma wanted to look away, he really did, but it was something about the way you rubbed your hands over your abs and chest to wipe off the moisture and the way you looked down with hooded eyes that had him entranced. he couldn't look away, and by the sight of the other people in the room also staring at you with no shame, they couldn't either.

despite being drunk, you could tell people were staring and it filled you with a sort of confidence you only got in the privacy of your room with kenma. speaking of kenma, he wasn't fairing any better. his head was turned to the side to look away, but his eyes betrayed him and stayed focused on your chest.

you smirked.

kenma gasped as you suddenly leaned forward, your hand slamming onto the wall next to him and the other pushing him by the hip, your cold fingers slithering up his shirt and sending chills up his spine. your breathe was warm next to his ear and kenma's blush intensified.

"see something you like, kitten?"

kenma's breathing began to get heavier the longer you whispered in his ear, his chest and pants tightening. kenma refused to look up, knowing half of the people in the gym were staring, but he would by lying if he said it didn't turn him on more than he already was.

your stopped whispering in kenma's ear and began trailing kisses down his jaw and neck, leaving marks behind. kenma had to bite his bottom lip to stop noises from escaping his mouth, but his restraint was limited due to the small amount of alcohol in his system.

your fingers traveled further up his shirt and caressed his waist, pulling him closer to you. pulling away from his neck, you turned to his lips, sucking and biting on them as if it would be the last time you would be able to. kenma's neck was littered with hickies that, even in the darkness of the gym, were extremely visible.

but before things could go any further, you were ripped away from kenma by a fuming daichi, "first you bring alcohol and get everyone drunk, then you try to fuck your boyfriend in the middle of the gym? i'm gonna kill you, y/n."

⇀ you were put on daichi watch for the rest of the night 😔🔫

⇀ but by the time 11 rolled around, you were a bit sober so i guess that's good

⇀ everyone gathered into he middle of the gym and counted down until midnight

⇀ kiyoko and yachi had hung some of those colour changing lights and gave the room some amazing vibes

⇀ and kenma was standing next to you, your arm slung over his shoulder as the lights hit his face perfectly and outlined every feature of his beautifully

⇀ you smiled down at him

"it's already 2021, huh?"

kenma looked up at you and immediately looked away when he saw that you were already looking at him. even after months of dating and nights spent in each other's embrace, he still got nervous when you looked at him the way you were right now.

eyes so full of love and lips pulled into a satisfied smile.

"yeah. . . i guess. . ."

you laughed and pulled him closer to your side, kenma stumbled a bit and grasped onto the new shirt you put on. it was a spare that you left behind in the clubroom one day.

"c'mon kenma! new year, new possibilities! what are your new years resolutions?"

kenma shrugged, burying his head deeper into your side, "i don't have any."

5 . . .

you smiled, "really?"

you looked back up at the digital clock kiyoko hung up on the wall just for new years, your smile never faltering. kenma loved that about you, your ability to smile no matter what. no matter the circumstances.

4 . . .

"what about you?" kenma asked, a small bubble of guilt building in his chest for not answering how he thought you wanted.

you looked down at him with the same lovesick eyes and satisfied smile, kenma felt his heart stop, "me?"

you looked back up at the clock, "hmm. . ."

3 . . .

"i think. . . " you drew out, a playful smile on your face when kenma pouted at your long answer. he slapped your chest when you laughed at him.

2 . . .

"i think," you tugged kenma in front of you and rested your chin on his head, a lazy smile drawn on your face as everyone else yelled about, excited for the new year.

1 . . .

"i think i have everything i could ever want right here."

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!

kenma gasped as you suddenly turned him around, lifting his face by the chin. everyone around you cheered as the clock hit 12 and it was now January 1, 2021.

kenma's heart pounded when he saw the same old lazy smirk on your face and the same old lovesick look in your eyes; but no matter how many times he's seen it, he would always feel the butterflies fluttering in hit stomach.

"happy new years, kenma." you whispered as you pulled him into a kiss.

what a way to start the new years.

⇀ everything after that was a blur

⇀ the party amping up as a way to start the new years and you were sure even daichi had a cup full of some unholy concoction of alcohol kiyoko made for him

⇀ when you woke up, you were in bed, kenma laying a your side.

⇀ with close on, y'nasties 👁

⇀ your head felt like it was going to explode and your stomach turned in ways it shouldn't

⇀ but you were too lazy to get outta bed

⇀ me 🤡

⇀ so you just pulled kenma closer and went back to sleep

⇀ dreaming of a happy future with the man in your arms

taglist:: @stickystrawberrysyrup @420-uwu @nvthvlyy @kaiwai @goshizaki-jun @thetrash-mammal @dprhvn @bakuhore

a/n :: i'll add the read more thing in the morning, i gotta start getting dressed for the new year party. this was kinda rushed too so sorry if it's a bit jumbled or something

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x manager #haikyuu x male reader #karasuno's male manager #karasuno x male manager #karasuno manager #haikyuu manager #haikyuu!!#haikyū!!#kenma x male reader #kenma x reader

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