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onlyjaeyun · 8 months

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𝐏𝐎𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐍 – 𝟐𝟕

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍: 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬

⤲ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐋𝐞𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

⤲ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞!𝐀𝐔, 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝!𝐀𝐔, 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭

⤲ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟖𝐤 (𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲)

⤲ 𝐜𝐰: 𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥 (𝐟.𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠), 𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐬𝐲 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐤!𝐬𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐠

⤲ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞, 𝐚 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞. 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐬, 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬, 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨'𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧...

Heessung isn't really sure why he thought it'd be a good idea to show up at your door at midnight on a random wednesday, you haven't been replying to any of his messages or returning to calls after all.

But after Jaeyun's – partly hurtful but true words, he knows this is the right thing to do.

He cares about you and he wants to make sure you know it, not because he's telling you but because because he's actively showing you.

As cliché as it may sound, Heeseung wants his actions to speak instead of his words and after hiding a rather important fact about his "best friend" from you, he knows he has to take advantage of every moment Sunghoon isn't by your side.

The past four days your brother has been trying his very best to take care of you, forcing you to do the basic hygiene part, whereas he took over the other stuff such as cleaning your apartment and bringing you home cooked meals Jongseong had sent to you.

Only after you promised to call him whenever you're eating, has he decided to give you some space, knowing you'd stay true to your words.

It's only been about two hours since Sunghoon had come home after staying at your place most week and as soon as Heeseung saw his best friend firmly asleep on the couch, he knew had to take the chance and leave.

Leave to see you, leave to finally hear more than "she told me", leave to find and pull you into his arms, breathe you in and apologize, explain himself to you and beg for your forgiveness.

There's so much he wants to do and say but he knows he has to be careful with his words. From what Sunghoon's been telling him, you haven't been talking much, one word answers and two word questions the only thing to leave your lips, mostly to make sure your brother doesn't go into cardiac arrest.

Heeseung's been too scared to talk to Jungwon about you, even though he's aware you two have been in contact since your brother had almost started crying when he talked about how proud he felt when he saw you listening to your best friend's voice mails.

Knowing he's broken your heart as bad as this has been destroying him in the worst way possible, yet he never once blamed anyone but himself, as usual.

However, this time he's decided to actually do something about it instead of just accepting his fate.

Heeseung has never been as serious about someone as he is with you and that's why he won't go down without a fight the way he usually does.

And maybe because he's still hopeful of a future with you, something he used to be too scared to even imagine, but actually had gotten a taste of and fell in love with just a few days ago.

Only by the time he arrives at the front door of your apartment, does Heeseung realise you'll probably see him through your security camera and deny him entrance, something he hasn't quite thought of when he rushed out of his own home to get to you.

But as soon as he decides to accept his defeat of the day, a gentle buzzing noise makes it way through his loud thoughts and with a gasp he pushes the door open, doesn't even bother waiting for the elevator.

And for a moment you wonder why you had decided to actually open the door for him, when your own brother had to beg for the same exact thing.

Maybe it's a moment of weakness and you don't actually want to see him and maybe it's the urge to hear him out, too lost in and broken from all those horrible thoughts that have been clouding your brain for the past four days.

You've barely stopped crying ever since your conversation about his best friend and functioning like an average human being has definitely never been this difficult.

So why would you actually give him the chance to say all these things to your face?

What's the point in looking at him while getting your heart broken? Does it make it any less painful, more real?

You actually have no idea, yet feel your breath hitching at the sudden sight of Lee Heeseung.

Dressed in a pair of dark sweats, a thick hoodie and an even bigger puffer jacket, his hair messily falling into his eyes because of the beanie on his head and at the sight of his glossy bambi eyes, you somehow feel your heart healing just the tiniest bit.

You've missed him.

The sound of his voice, his touch, his kisses and his scent, just him.

After finally getting a taste of being so close to him, you've stopped denying just how much your body's been craving him and his presence rather quickly.

You've never hated him for the things he's done and said and you probably won't ever feel resentment for him, yet he's always managed to break your heart into thousands of pieces to the point where breathing felt like an actual challenge.

As your eyes roam his tired face, you let out a shaky sigh when you notice the darkness under his eyes and exhaustion lingering in the sweet brown around his slightly dilated pupil.

Just as usual a beat of silence follows his sudden presence and gives you enough time to take in the sight you've missed so much, yearning to be in his arms and finally feel the ache in your heart slowly but surely fade away.

You know he's always going to be the only one to have this effect on you, even if he happens to be the reason for the pain in the first place.

"Can I – Can you please hear me out? All I need is five minutes and then I'll leave, I promise." Heeseung's voice is strained and raspy, slightly hoarse and for a moment you wonder if he's been just as effected by everything as you.

"Come in", you reply calmly and look at him with tired eyes, destroying his heart with a chainsaw in the process as he notices how physically and emotionally exhausted you look.

With a soft sigh you step to the side and watch the way he takes his shoes off before he walks into the hallway of your apartment.

You notice his lack of gloves, his pale hands red from the cold and the urge to take them in yours and warm him up is definitely harder to suppress than you thought.

"Do you want me to make you some tea? A hot water bottle? Need a blanket?"

You don't look at him as the words leave your lips because for some reason you feel embarrassed about the fact he's the first person besides your brother and best friend who you've said this many words to within the past few days.

And as soon as you lift your head and actually meet his eyes, he seems surprised, just as you'd expected, maybe even a little confused.

Every time you've talked to Heeseung ever since Jake's birthday, you've noticed this certain expression of uncertainty and surprise in his eyes, as if he couldn't believe you were actually as interested in him as you claimed to be.

"I – no, thank you", he stammers and takes his jacket off, revealing his pretty neck to your hungry eyes and you hate how you seem so shameless when it comes to him.

"I'm listening."

Your sudden reply doesn't sound like one, but definitely is a demand.

Heeseung can tell how tense you are from the way you've balled both hands into fists as they're neatly placed on your thighs and the way you've been chewing the inside of your cheek for the past few minutes.

"I hate Bae Sumin", he begins and looks away as her name leaves his lips because he knows he can't bear your reaction to hearing it and from the way your eyes start burning with tears, you're glad he knows you as well as he does.

"She's the biggest mistake and only regret in my life", a deep sigh follows his words before he pulls his beanie off of his head and reveals the rest of his messy hair to you, "and she's been blackmailing me into a friendship with her ever since the day we met."

Now that new piece of information leaves you speechless.

You can't help but look at him with raised brows and parted lips, actual shock grazing your features and as soon as Heeseung catches a glimp of your expression, he can't help but pull his bottom lip between his teeth.

He hates himself for being so attracted to you to the point where everything you say or do is driving himninto insanity. Evennin the most inappropriate moments.

"Care to uhm – elaborate?"

Heeseung nods and starts fumbling with the rings on his fingers, quickly pulling your attention to the one you know your brother had gotten him on his 18th birthday and the one he hasn't taken off ever since.

"Right after the party, Hoonie and I both started our jobs at the company and neither one of us actually knew who Sumin was because she's only recently started being part of her family's public image", he explains and you nod, attentively listening to him and trying your best not to focus on the way his lips move.

"She applied for the manager job of the basketball team and that's how we ran into each other again. Sunghoon never liked her and none of the boys were fond of her, either", the sound of another deep exhale fills the space of your living room, "long story short, about a month into the semester she told me about how her uncle, who just so happens to be Hoonie's boss, asked her if she knew the new intern and what she thinks of him."

"Oh, my God", you whisper when the realisation hits you. Yet again, life had decided to test Heeseung with the loyalty towards his best friend and with big eyes you look at him.

"Ever since that day she asked me to spend time with her and whenever you said no one too many times, she went 'it'd be such a bummer if your precious Sunghoon lost the internship he worked so hard for' and that's why I'm stuck with her."

All of a sudden everything makes sense.

Everything he's done and said, just to protect your brother's future career and current situation. Neither one of them ever fails to surprise you with their selflessness whenever it comes to each other and as your brain processes his words, you can't help but tear up again.

It's not like you minded Sumin's prrsence in his life, you never cared enough in the first place.

"Why did you hide it from me?"

You don't give your brain enough time to intervene as you voice the question lingering in your broken heart, a thick veil of tears blurring your sight almost instantly.

"I thought it was the right thing", Heeseung whispers and you hate how his voice breaks at the end of his sentence, since it genuinely worsens the state of your shattered soul.

"Would you still have thought the same if I did that, Heeseung?"

"Huh?"

"Imagine if I fucked Jungwon at one point and didn't tell you", you say and instantly feel a weird taste coating your tongue at the mere thought of crossing a line like that with your life long best friend, "would you have preferred if I kept it to myself?"

Within a second jealousy flashes through Heeseung's eyes and you can tell how he's tensing up the more he thinks about it.

"No", he presses through gritted teeth and throws his head back with a sigh of defeat.

"Then you understand why I'm as hurt as I am, right?"

"Yes, Baby", he mumbles, his head shoots up as soon as he realises how he had addressed you, but you don't bother correcting him.

"You have to tell Sunghoon and cut that bitch out of your life, Heeseung", you finally say after a long beat of silence, the sudden waves of anger towards the young woman resurfacing way quicker than you could have expected, "or I won't give you another chance."

Your ultimatum doesn't come to either one of you as a surprise; you both know there's no way you'd let that woman be part of his life along with you, too aware she'd make everything a competition to the point where it ruins you.

Heeseung didn't expect any less from you, he even feels proud of how confident you are about it, glad you finally know your worth and set boundaries.

"I'm going to talk to your brother", he then sighs and shakes his head, "his career isn’t worth losing you forever. Nothing is.. He's smart and ambitious, has good grades and a great reputation, he'll find something else."

You can't deny just how happy his words make you. For the first time in what feels like ever, Heeseung isn't choosing your brother over you, something you never dare to think about yet are often reminded of. A fact you know you should feel ashamed about because of their bond and its importance, yet can't help but feel validated by.

"Jaeyun suggested to print the screenshots out and send them to her uncle", he suddenly says and looks up at you, attentively taking in the sight of your puffy, bloodshot eyes and your swollen lips, losing himself in the thought of kissing you for a second.

"That sounds a lot like a Sim Jaeyun plan", you chuckle and fumble with the tissue in your hand, "and I think it's a good one. Hoon's been the backbone of his team for almost four years, they know how good he's at his job. Even if she's close with her uncle, he'll probably think of his business first."

Heeseung approves your words with a soft nod, runs both hands over his face and pulls his beaie back over his head with a gentle sigh.

"Thank you for hearing me out", he says and suddenly stands up, "I'm sorry for hiding this from you and I'm going to do everything in my power to show you I'm worth your forgiveness."

He sounds confident yet unsure, his eyes fixated on yours and yet obviously filled with longing for your approval.

"Have you eaten anything today yet? Do you want me to order you something?"

With your brows furrowed in confusion you look up at him, the current position making him lightheaded as you your pretty eyes are focused on his face and he oh so happens to stand right in front of your seated self.

"Are you..leaving?"

You're surprised at your own question.

You didn't mean to ask him, yet the suddenness of his movements have overwhelmed you and you're actually scared he might just go.

"Yes", he says quickly and sighs, taking another step back, "I don't deserve to stay just yet. I have to earn the privilege of being with you, princess."

You physically can't stop yourself from tearing up at his words and with glossy eyes you look at him, slowly standing up and absolutely indulging in the close proximity.

For some reason the air is heavier than just a few minutes ago and you can't help but wonder if you're the only one to feel like that.

"Okay", you whisper and finally take a step away from him, despite the urge to bury your face in the crook of his neck and fall asleep with his scent in your system.

"Just to make sure, you didn't fuck Jungwon, did you?" Heeseung laughs awkwardly, yet loosens up as soon as he hears your little chuckle followed my an eye roll when you shake your head in response to his question.

"Losing your virginity to your best friend is such a cliché", you add casually and cross your arms over your chest when a sudden coldness hits you.

"P-Pardon?"

And as soon as Heeseung speaks, you freeze.

The realization of what you've just told him hits you like a ton of iced bricks, sends shivers down your spine and actually leaves you gasping for air for a solid minute.

You weren't planning on telling Heeseung about something so intimate, not yet.

The fear of your lack of actual experience scaring him away is far too big to risk it and the thought of him being turned off by you sends a rush of anxiety through your veins.

"I'm sorry", you sigh and grab your forehead, "I didn't mean to make it awkward."

You try to play his reactions off, mostly to make sure neither one of you is unnecessarily uncomfortable but mostly to stop your brain from interpreting things under the influence of arousal.

He already had a slightly flushed face and ears when he walked in a few minutes ago, the cold the reason behind it. And his glossy – no, needy eyes are something you should have gotten used to a long time ago. Heeseung looks at everyone like that, there's absolutely no point int reading into it too much.

"But, you had boyfriends", he suddenly says and looks at you confused, his statement flustering you in the worst way possible.

"Can we please not talk about this, Heeseung", you whisper and feel shame and embarrassment overwhelm you again, "I really don't want to."

"Okay – yeah, of course", he whispers and almost chokes on his own spit at the mere possibility of being your first in something still existing.

"Can I just..ask you a question?"

The words lay heavy on his tongue because he's ready to have his hope being shattered into million pieces yet again but for some reason he can't help but be hopeful.

"I am."

Is the only thing you reply, not giving him the chance to vocalise said question as you let out a shaky sigh and look away.

After going through all these emotions the past few days, you definitely didn't expect to find yourself talking about your virginity with Heeseung, of all people.

Admitting your lack of orgasms from someone else was difficult enough, you definitely wanted to wait a little longer to tell him about this. If you had ever planned to come clean about it in the first place anyway.

Heeseung tries his very best to stay composed and calm but this new found information about you is about to drive him into absolute insanity.

You're a virgin. Nobody has ever had the privilege to lose themselves inside of you. Nobody knows what you feel and look like when you're filled to the brim. Nobody on this fucking earth has ever had you cumming for them in the most intimate way possible.

No matter how hard he tries to deny it, there's a feeling of relief rushing through his chest. He never expected you to be untouched, he couldn't have. Yet knowing he still has the opportunity to be the first, if you ever saw him worthy enough, excited him more than it should.

He never cared if his partners were inexperienced.

And he never found himself genuinely caring about it when it came to you. Of course he somehow hoped to give you the opportunity to live new experiences, maybe a few firsts but not like this.

First the fact nobody has ever made you cum and now this.

"I should – get going", he suddenly presses out, his head spinning from the lack of oxygen in his lungs and for a minute he's convinced he might just pass out.

"Oh", you can't help but feel a sting in your heart at his response, "okay."

As soon as he hears the tone of your voice, a huge warning pops off in his mind and with attentive eyes he tries to read your expressions.

You've looked hurt since you had opened him the door, yet this time there seems to be something else. A different type of pain lingering in the sweet color of your eyes as you try to maintain eye contact.

"What's wrong?"

He quickly asks and reaches for your face, only to stop himself halfway up when he remembers his initial intentions.

"I'm just tired", you say calmly and you're technically not lying to him, you've barely slept all week after all, "my mind's a little fuzzy still, so I think I should go to sleep soon."

"That's not everything."

Damn Lee Heeseung and his stupid ability to read you like an open book.

You've always thought your poker face is good enough, only to realize it's probably a joke to him.

"It's been a long week, Seung", you sigh, "let's call it a night for now, yeah? We can talk about it tomorrow or whenever you're free."

"Baby please", he finally dares to step a little closer to you, "I want to take care of you the way you deserve. Please, give me the chance to."

With your lips pressed into a thin line you play with the hem of your oversized shirt, trying to sort out what exactly it is you're feeling and thinking.

"It's not the right time", you whisper suddenly, "I haven't forgiven you yet."

Your words are harsh, but honest and Heeseung is glad you're standing your ground and refuse to give in as easily as one might expect from you.

No matter how much his heart hurts, he knows you've been hurting worse because of him these past few days. This is the least you could tell him.

"You're right, I'm so–."

"And I told you I'd disappoint you when it comes to the topic of intimacy", you don't really know why you decided to interrupt him or say what had just fallen past your lips but you simply couldn't stop yourself from saying that, even if you had tried.

"Disappoint..me?"

Heeseung seems genuinely confused about your words.

There's absolutely nothing he could think of when it comes to this topic you could ever disappoint him with. Let alone your lack of experience.

"I have done a few things", you whisper and hate the way your body grows hotter at the thought of talking to Heeseung about sex, "I just never made it to the point where I wanted to go all the way in."

Your confession makes his heart skip a beat, just so it can hammer against his rib cage with full force, thrumming in his throat and ears.

For a second Heeseung feels the need to steady himself and subconsciously reaches for you, despite knowing he hasn't moved an inch the past few minutes.

"And you think that's disappointing to me?" he asks curiously and never once shifts his gaze from yours, the fire in his usually so soft and gentle eyes one you've grown quite familiar with and all you can do is nod hesitantly.

"Baby", he presses through gritted teeth, "I never cared about it. And I still don't. You're still going to be the only thing on my mind when I cum."

Heeseung's lewd choice of words definitely shouldn't surprise you as much as it does, since you've heard it quite a few times now, yet you still can't help but gasp for air.

You hate the way your brain is fighting your body, telling you to be rational and not get worked up over him talking to you like this, but how could you when this is Lee Heeseung. The one man you've ever fantasized about, the main character of all your dirty fantasies and dreams, the one you've been secretly saving yourself for.

There's no way you can actively stop your heart from beating a little further down, right in between your legs.

"Does it drive me crazy? Absolutely", he breathes and pushes a strand of your hair out of your face with one of his fingers, never once touching your skin yet sending shivers down your spine, "but it's never been of relevance for me. I still want you like a starved man."

"Stop", you whisper and let your hands find home in the fabric of his hoodie, tightening your grip and pushing yourself against his chest without hesitation; a complete contrast to your request, "I'm not strong enough to reject you right now."

"Does it feel like I'm taking advantage of your vulnerability, Y/N?"

Heeseung's question surprises you and with a soft sigh you shake your head. It never felt like he's taking advantage of any of your emotional states, which probably just makes everything even worse. Everything he does and says seems so genuine and honest, you can't get yourself to distance yourself from him. No matter how hard you try.

You know you should still be angry and mad at him, what he's done isn't supposed to be forgiven this quickly but the way you're physically and emotionally craving him feels unhealthy if not treated.

"Your words, Baby, need you to use them for me", he whispers against your lips and sighs softly when you let out a tiny "no, Seungie".

He genuinely can't believe how hard he's right now, not after he's been crying the past few days thinking of ways to make his wrongdoing up to you. Not after he genuinely thought about leaving the city to give you the space you need.

“Good girl”, the praise leaves his lips almost instinctively. There’s always been something about the way you look at him which makes him want to lay the world to your feet and never have you lift a single finger again.

He’s been wondering if you enjoy hearing it as much as he likes doing it and as soon as you bury your face in his neck with the softest, neediest whimper he’s ever heard, Heeseung finally gets the answer to his question.

“Baby, what do you want me to do? I want you to decide”, he whispers softly, his big hands caressing your back as he loses himself in the feeling of holding you in his arms.

“I feel like I should send you home and get my ass to sleep”, you reply and finally wrap your arms around his small waist, pressing yourself even closer against his chest in an attempt to ease your nerves.

“No, princess. What do you want? Forget about what you think you should do, this is all about you and your needs and desires."

Heeseung takes your face into his big hands in the softest and most gentle way possible, nudges his nose against yours and grazes his lips against your parted ones with a soft sigh.

"I want you to stay", you finally let go of all those thoughts in your head and take a deep breath, loving the way his scent fills your nose and calms your nerves just how you needed, "and I want to fall asleep in your arms."

"There you go, well done", Heeseung smiles against your lips, yet doesn't move any further and that's when you realize he's not going unless you tell him.

"And I want you to kiss me."

That's everything he needs to hear and without missing another beat, Heeseung presses his pretty lips against yours, capturing them in a hungry kiss.

He wants to go slow and soft, yet after finally getting a taste, he's been thinking about nothing else. It takes him every bit of self control not to shove his tongue down your throat and have you moan into his mouth the way you did in his car all those days ago.

But as you start moving further into his touch, your kisses growing greedier, hungrier and needier, your hands digging into the actual skin of his waist, Heeseung knows you're just as impatient as he is.

So without losing more time, he reaches for your arms and places them around his neck, a soft grunt escaping his pretty lips when you pull off his beanie and let your hands find home in his hair. The urge to pull you even closer against his body until not a single piece of paper could fit in between the two of you is overwhelming and for a moment Heeseung isn't sure if there's any oxygen left in his lungs.

You hum into his mouth, letting him take over and enjoying the way his tongue plays with yours, grazing it too and exploring your mouths in the most perfect way possible.

Heeseung's hands are messily roaming your body, groping and kneading every bit of flesh he can reach and you can tell how much he's holding himself back by the gentle pain in your hips from how much he's been digging his fingers into your skin. So with a gentle push to his wrist, you guide him to your ass, a soft whimper falling past your lips as soon as he takes a handful of your soft flesh, pushing your hips against his own without realizing it.

You love the way Heeseung is making you feel. Everything about the way he kisses and touches you makes you feel desired and adored in a way none of your previous boyfriends had managed to and for the first time in your life you actually feel sexy.

Heeseung doesn't give you much time to think, his lips sucking on your tongue, teeth digging into the soft flesh of your bottom lip as he kisses his way to your chin and down to your neck with a deep grunt rumbling through his chest.

A row of your soft whimpers and little whines fill the space of your living room and as soon as he hears the way you're falling apart for him, from just a few kisses, he feels like he could cum in his pants without the feeling of a single touch.

"Tell me to stop", he whispers, begs gently and sucks the skin of your neck into his mouth, "please, Baby."

"No", you whisper quickly and guide his hand to your chest, yearning for his touch, only for your breath to hitch in your throat as soon as you takes one of your tits into his palms, "I want you so bad."

"How do you want me, angel girl? I'm at your mercy, wanna do whatever you want me to." Heeseung's voice is raspy and hoarse, the arousal present in every single one of his words.

Of course it doesn't take you longer than a second to know what you want. You've been dreaming about it for months now, your thoughts just intensifying after seeing the name of a certain groupchat.

Only one of your three boyfriends had ever tried to go down on you, only to leave you absolutely disappointed after about a minute of trying. Their lack of desire as well as energy and motivation definitely weren't something you enjoyed and for some reason you just know Heeseung is going to be the exact opposite.

Maybe that's why asking him isn't as difficult and embarrassing as it used to be with your previous lovers.

"I want you to eat me out."

The words of every single fantasy he's ever had are finally processing in his brain because you actually said them out loud.

Heeseung has never wanted much in his life, he never had the privilege to ask for a lot, so he's always been cautious about what he wants.

Burying his face in your pretty cunt has been on top of that small list for as long as he can think of, right after you as a whole.

So as his brain tries to make its way through the fog of arousal, he can't help but halt his movements.

For a moment you're actually afraid you might have turned him off with your request, your choice of words or your boldness, only to notice the way his eyes have turned darker than you've ever seen them as he looks up at you with flushed cheeks and parted lips.

"Say that again", he whispers against your mouth and digs his fingers further into the flesh of your thighs, "please, Baby. I have to hear them again so I know this isn't another dream."

Another dream.

So he has actually been thinking about you in that way and despite his several confessions you can't help but gulp harshly once the realization hits you.

"I want you to eat me out, please", you repeat yourself a little less confident, your voice smaller than before because of all the arousal clouding your brain and as soon as Heeseung's deep moan fills your ears you feel your cunt clenching in despair, ruining your panties even more.

"That's my girl", Heeseung grunts and suddenly drops to his knees, pushes your oversized shirt up just enough to reveal the skin of your lower stomach before he starts littering open mouthed kisses all over you.

"Mine", that single word and its meaning send shivers down your whole body and yet again your heart starts beating in the center of your pussy to the point where you can feel just how sensitive you've gotten.

You attentively watch the way Heeseung takes off his own Hoodie, leaving him in a black shirt and for some reason he's never looked as attractive as he does on his knees with his flushed face so close to where you need him the most.

"Come on, Baby", he suddenly whispers and gently pulls down your shirts, revealing your little lace panties to his hungry eyes and quickly burying his face in your clothed cunt, "tell me who you belong to, yeah? Use those big girl words for me."

You try everything in your power to form a proper, coherent sentence but the fact you can feel Heeseung's pretty nose nudge against your sensitive clit has your head spinning to the point where keeping your balance is an actual struggle.

"You smell perfect", his voice is muffled by the way he's pressing his nose deeper in between your legs right before he gently pushes them further apart and pulls away to look at you.

"Oh, Baby", Heeseung cooes and looks uo at you with a soft smile and the prettiest shine in his bambi eyes, "you're fucking soaked. Made a mess of those pretty panties, what a bummer."

And before you can even think about what to reply, you hear the sound of fabric being torn apart, followed by watching your now destroyed underwear gently fall to the floor.

"Don't worry, I'll get you a new pair", he whispers but from the way he's staring at your now exposed cunt you can tell he's barely available anymore.

You try to read his expression, only to come to the conclusion that Heesung looks drunk. His eyes are heavy, his cheeks an even darker shade of red than before, lips swollen from the abuse of his teeth and his words sounds slurred.

You've never had anyone look at you with such hunger and that's probably why you don't feel exposed at all. Usually this would have been the point where you ask your boyfriend to turn off the lights to feel a little more comfortable and hidden but as you're standing there with your complete cunt put on full display for Heeseung to look at and admire, you've never felt more at ease.

"Say something, please", you whisper and push your fingers through his thick hair, tilting his head back to meet his gaze and you can't help but hasp at the way he looks at you.

"Couch", Seung whispers and gets on his feet, his hand around your wrist, "and spread those pretty legs for me, princess."

His words, voice and touch feel hypnotizing and without hesitation you find yourself doing as you're told, your eyes never once shifting away from his face and if it wasn't for how well you know him, you'd be worried about the look on Heeseung's handsome face.

It doesn't take long for him to drop to his knees yet again, yet this time he seems hesitant and all of a sudden tension floods your body.

"No", he whispers and quickly pushes your legs apart again, his other hand reaching for the couch as he digs his nails into the soft fabric until his knuckles have turned white, "I just need a moment to stop myself from cumming in my pants."

His confession has your cunt clenching around nothing and you can feel your juices leak out of you, something you have never experienced before and yet again, not an ounce of shame or embarrassment overwhelms you.

Knowing Heeseung has to physically calm himself to stop himself from reaching his climax makes your eyes roll into the back of your head and with a soft whimper you reach for his hair.

"This is the most perfect pussy I've ever seen", he whispers, his lids flutter shut before he pushes his cheek against your inner thigh, followed by a row of open mouthed kisses on the soft skin.

"And it's all mine."

His possessiveness comes naturally, he never meant for these thoughts to leave his head but as soon as you said those words to him, Heeseung has stopped thinking rationally and isn't planning on going back anytime soon.

And from the way you're bucking your hips up with the sweetest, most desperate whimper he's ever heard he can tell you're actually agreeing to him.

"Say it, Baby", you have no idea how many times he's made you use your words today but you don't even think about denying his request.

"It's yours, Seungie", you whine and try your best to stop squirming but no matter what, the arousal has become absolutely unbearable.

You've never been this turned on in your entire life and for the first time you're actually positive you might actually cum.

"Good girl", the praise rolls off of his tongue in the most casual manner and you hate how much heat it sends through your veins; you're already on fire and everything he does or says, just the way he looks at you pours more gasoline to it and you feel like you might pass out from the overwhelming feeling.

"You're so fucking wet." Heeseung wants to be a little less blunt and more sensual, softer and a little more romantic but his brain has shut off minutes ago and at the sight of your soaked cunt he can't seem to produce a single thought.

He's never been this aroused, none of his fantasies coming close to reality as his eyes take in the image of you in the most perfect way possible.

"Please, Seungie", you breathe as the anticipation becomes too much, "I want you so bad."

How could he ever deny a request so sweet? How could he even think about denying you what he's been dreaming about for years to the point where not a single day passed by without thoughts of you saying exactly these words to him?

So with a soft sigh and his eyes glued on your face, Heeseung leans down and lets his tongue graze over the slit of your pretty cunt, only for a deep, guttural moan of his to fill the quiet space of your living room.

For a whole minute, the world comes to a stop as the taste of your sweet juices spread on his tongue and send him into the deepest, darkest corners of his lust; something he would have never expected to see yet has already become addicted to with just a single taste.

"Finally", is the first word to leave his lips after what felt like an eternity and you can't help but bite your bottom lip at the sight of his eyes rolling into the back of his head.

You expect him to say something else, but as soon as Heeseung finds his way back to reality, he literally buries his face in your cunt and starts lapping up every single drop of your arousal without shame.

The feeling of his hot tongue grazing your drenched folds, his moans and soft whimpers, as well as the feeling of his nails digging into your hips as he pushes you against his mouth is absolutely overwhelming. There's no other way to describe what your body is going through.

You throw your head back in ecstasy, losing yourself in the haze of pleasure and finally getting what you've been dreaming about for so long, from the man you've never stopped thinking about.

And Lee Heeseung can definitely back up his big words. The way his tongue slowly yet firmly works its way up and down your pretty pussy isn't meant to bring you to the edge, it's just him savoring your taste in his mouth and literally devouring you.

With every flick of his hot muscle against your hardened, sensitive bundle of nerves you arch your back, pushing yourself against him even further until his noises are completely muffled and all you can think about is the sweet feeling of relief slowly building up in the bottom of your spine.

You can barely pay attention to his pretty face, the pleasure taking over every single bone in your body and by the time you do look down, you're absolutely mesmerized by the sight you're met with.

Heeseung seems absolutely lost in your pussy, skillfully moving his head with his tongue flattened, sucking your clit into his hot mouth before he pushes his to gue into your tight hole and easily starts fucking you with it.

Neither one of you manages to say anything; not a single word being exchanged as you both lose yourself in your biggest fantasy becoming reality.

With every movement of his tongue, your little hole clenches even tighter, making a mess of his whole face to the point where you can see your juices covering his flushed cheeks.

"S-Seung", your breath hitches in your throat when you suddenly feel his thumb pressing against your sensitive clit, rubbing gentle circles into it and pushing you even closer to the edge in a way nobody has ever managed to do it before.

"Need it, princess", Heeseung grunts and pushes his tongue into your pussy, looking up at you with the tip of his pretty nose grazing your clit whenever his digit disappears, "I need you to cum all over my tongue."

All you can do is nod as his name falls past your bit swollen lips in breathy whimpers and high pitched moans to the point where you're convinced your neighbors probably know who's currently buried between your legs.

But you can't get yourself to care enough. Your only focus being the prettiest man you've ever seen and the feeling of his tongue grazing the spongy walls of your cunt.

"You're almost there, angel girl", he sighs and pulls you closer to his face, gently rubbing another set of circles into your clit as he laps up more of your juices, not giving a fuck about the way a mixture of his own spit and your arousal is dripping down his neck, "do it for me, yeah? Be my good girl and cum for me, cum for your man."

And for some reason his choice to address himself as well as the sweet, raspy tone of his voice are more than enough to push you over the edge.

The coil in your lower stomach finally snaps and with a harsh inhale, the feeling of sweet relief starts spreading through your body all the way to the tip of your fingers and toes.

"That's my good girl", Heeseung mumbles but you can barely hear him, his voice muffled from the blood rushing in your ears as your heart slams against your rib cage and your cunt spasms uncontrollably around his tongue.

And as he watches the way you lose yourself in the sweetness of your orgasm, Heeseung can't help but smile against your pretty pussy, eyes heavy as he swallows your release and swears it's the sweetest thing he's ever had the privilege to taste.

You have absolutely no idea how much time passes until your ears stop ringing and you actually feel air filling your lungs, your sight still slightly blurry when you open your eyes and loosen your tight grip on Heeseung's hair.

You need another moment to regain your composure until your eyes drop to the man between your legs, only to whimper when you watch the way he places the softest kisses on your pulsating clit, followed by a soft "so good".

The longer you look at him, the harder the realization of what just happened hits you and for some reason your body decides to represent your current state in the form of tears because before you can even overthink anything, you feel them pricking at the corners of your eyes.

Heeseung still seems completely dazed, like he can barely keep his eyes open and you don't miss the way he keeps licking your lips to make sure not a single drop goes to waste.

But as soon as his hazy brain manages to pull him back to the here and now, his brows furrowed in light confusion and instead worry flashes through his hooded eyes.

"What's wrong, Baby? Did I hurt you? Was it too much? Did I take it too far?"

You can literally feel the heaviness vanishing from his shoulders and chest when you instantly start shaking your head, denying his implications and just reaching for his face to pull his whole body closer to your own.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to cry", you sob into the crook of his neck, barely noticing the way he flips you two over rather casually, "it was perfect. I've never felt this good. Nobody has ever..thank you."

Heeseung can't help but chuckle breathlessly at your words. He definitely wasn't expecting you to cry after receiving your first orgasm from someone else but the sincerity in your voice is what does it to him. The fact you're still so gentle and sweet after making an actual mess of his face is so like you, he actually feels himself falling for you all over again.

"No, Baby, thank you for giving me the privilege of your pleasure", he sighs and kisses your forehead, making sure not to get any of your juices on your skin to avoid awkwardness, "I won't ever take this for granted. This is everything I've ever dreamed of."

You don't know what to say, all you can do is treasure his words and give them the safest place in your heart before your eyes start feeling heavy as the exhaustion of your orgasm finally hits you.

"I can't stay tonight, Baby", Heeseung says softly after he's firmly tucked you into the warmth of your bed, his hand gently caressing your cheek and you sleepily nod, "I don't want to lie to Sunghoon or talk about another woman, even if she doesn't exist, when it's about you. I'll call you tomorrow and come by after your brother's left, yeah?"

You nod and kiss the palm of his ring clad hand with a soft sigh, loving the fact his face is the lash thing you'll see before falling asleep.

"Good girl", Heeseung says and gives you one last kiss on the forehead before he gets up, "I'm so proud of you, Baby. My perfect little princess. All mine, right?" You hum approvingly, not awake enough to properly register what he's said but agreeing nonetheless.

"And I'm all and only yours, angel girl." That's the last thing to reach you and as Heeseung watches the way your lids fall shut and don't open again, he can't help but stay another five minutes just to look at you and wonder how he could ever be worthy of a heart as perfect as yours.

← 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 — 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 — 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 →

(A/N: the length..i’m sorry about the length like genuinely…but i hope you still enjoyed it and dont worry i’d skip a lot if i were you so just go ahead 💀 sending everyone kisses and tysm for all the love and support, i love you SO much 🥺🩷 especially feedback and reblogs are appreciated my loves!🧸💗)

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onlyjaeyun · 7 months

Text

𝐏𝐎𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐍 – 𝟑𝟐

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐓𝐖𝐎: 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐬

⤲ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐋𝐞𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

⤲ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞!𝐀𝐔, 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝!𝐀𝐔, 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭

⤲ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟏𝟎𝐤 (𝐢'𝐦 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲)

⤲ 𝐜𝐰: 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐛𝐯𝐬𝐞 (𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥, 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥), 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐭𝐡, 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐲 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬, 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬, 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐯𝐢𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲 (𝐟.), 𝐮𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐨𝐲𝐬, 𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥 (𝐟. 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠), 𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠

(A/N: this chap is a little heavier since it's gonna go deeper into not only heeseung's but mostly the parks' family situation so pls be aware!)

"And I heard him go 'Yeah, bro, I think she might even be the one' to Heeseung." Jay's voice is a mere whisper as he bends down to be close to your ear, both of you bursting into a row of giggles once he's done, the vegetables on your boards long forgotten.

You can't help but smile brighter and brighter the more you replay your brother's best friend's words in your head, the excitement about your his new girlfriend something you have yet to get used to.

From what Heeseung had told you, Sunghoon had apparently decided to actually go all in and ask the girl he had told you about to be his official girlfriend the day he had texted you and ever since then you've been on the edge of your seat, patiently waiting to finally get to know her.

Hoon's always been reluctant about relationships. The broken marriage of your parents a huge factor in his trust and commitment issues and every time you two talk about it, you're surprised about the difference in your trauma responses.

You definitively don't and have never blamed him for it. Of course you'd wish your brother to find someone he can trust and love the way you know he's capable of, yet by the time he had finally managed to escape the prison of your childhood home he had already developed this particular mindset.

Knowing he's genuinely serious about her has your vision blur with tears of happiness.

There's nobody on this planet who deserves to be loved and appreciated, respected and adored in a romantic way the way your brother does.

Followed by his closest, longest and best friend.

And as if he felt it in his chest, you suddenly spot Heeseung's tall figure in your peripheral vision, jolts of excitement and warmth rushing through your body in the best way possible.

You two haven't had the chance to be alone since he had arrived about ten minutes after Jongseong and despite many opportunities occurring, neither one of you had dared to even sneak more than short glances, too afraid the chef might catch up on the fire between you.

However, you definitely don't let Jay's presence stop you from basking in the feeling of comfort and safety Heeseung comes with.

"What are you two whispering and giggling about, hm?" He sounds playful and relaxed, his hair messily falling into his handsome face and as soon as his gaze meets your for a quick moment, you pull your bottom lip between your teeth and try to stop yourself from staring at him.

Unfortunately he never makes this challenge easy for you.

After having to join a spontaneous staff meeting at work, Heeseung hadn't bothered to change, so there he is, dressed in a white dress shirt, sleeves rolled up, the first three of his buttons lose just enough to expose the soft skin of the bottom of his neck, tugged firmly into the matching black slacks.

He's literally not even wearing shoes, yet you can't help the way your body heats up the longer you look at him and by the time your eyes make their way back to his face, Heeseung shoots you a warning look.

"We're talking about Hoon's new girlfriend", Jay chuckles and reaches for a carrot, his back turned to his best friend as he focuses on his task.

"You know you could just...ask me about her, right?" Heeseung smiles and sits down on one the chairs at your kitchen table, spreading his legs and leaning back just enough for it to be tempting. His current posture looks like a silent invitation and if it wasn't for Jong, you would have gotten comfortable on his lap as soon as he sat down.

"You always leave out details", you reply and roll your eyes, yet suddenly stopping in your tracks when you realise your words indicate a lot more communication between the two of you than the others are aware of.

"He does! Oh, my God!" As soon as Jongseong turns around to shoot his friend an accusing look, you let out the breath you were holding in and finally get yourself to relax as soon as he gets back to chopping up the carrot on his board.

"Shut the fuck up", Heeseung scoffs and this time he's the one to widen his eyes when he realises what he had just said, not realising you might think he was actually talking to you.

"Hey, be nice to her", Jay quickly spits back and doesn't bother turning his whole body to look at him, "she's right and we all know it."

"That was directed at you, pretty face", Seung quickly saves himself and you can't stop your lips from stretching into a cheeky smile, "I'd never talk to her like that."

The urge to just go up to and kiss him is absolutely overwhelming and despite being more than just grateful for Jong's help, you can't help but wish it was just the two of you.

"My prince charming", you reply cheekily and shoot him a wink, loving the way his ears turn red as soon as your words him, followed by the soft colour spreading to the apples of his cheeks and even to the tip of his nose.

A beat of silence follows your statement, the only noise to fill your kitchen being the bubbling of Jay's infamous stew as well as the soft humming of your oven.

"So, how long has this been going on between the two of you?"

All of a sudden the world stops turning.

If it wasn't for your tight grip on the handle of the knife in your hand, you're pretty sure you would have dropped it on your feet as soon as your brain had managed to process your brother's best friend's words.

"What the fuck are you talking about, Jongseong?" Heeseung's voice is strained and raspy, the hot anxiety evident in every single one of his words despite the sternness in his tone, meanwhile you can barely push yourself to breathe properly.

There's some sort of tension in the air and you feel your skin crawling, shivers of nervousness rushing down your spine and for a short moment you're convinced you've misheard him.

You physically can't get yourself to look at either one of them, too stunned to react, let alone speak.

"Oh, come the fuck on", Jong says and throws the chopped carrottes into the brewing broth before he turns around and leans against your kitchen counter to face the two of you.

"Do you really think I'm stupid? Wait, let me rephrase that", he says and smirks, "do you really think I'm as oblivious as Sunghoon and the rest?"

Heeseung audibly gasps for air at his friend's words and your body actually starts hurting from all the tension in your muscles.

"Can you two please relax a little bit, I feel like shitting my pants and I don't even know why", Jongseong deadpans and crosses his arms in front of his buff chest, his muscles straining against the fabric of his black dress shirt and you gulp harshly.

"What gave us away?"

Heeseung's sudden question leaves you just as stunned and with big eyes you slowly turn your head to look at him with the most "What the actual fuck" expression in your gaze.

"Hm, just the fact you guys not only stare at each other with actual hearts in your eyes but also have been eye-fucking right in front of my precious food for hours now."

For some reason, Jong's calm yet aggregated comment elicits a choked out chuckle from your throat and with a soft whine of embarrassment you hide your face behind both of your hands.

Before you get the chance to do anything else, you feel Heeseung's tall body pressing into your back right as he turns you around and wraps his arms around your shoulders, pushing your face into his chest with a soft chuckle.

"Yun and Wonie are on it as well, aren't they?", Jay asks and shoots his best friend a genuine smile of relief and happiness, warming Heeseung's chest as he realises he's never been as subtle about his feelings for you as he thought.

"Yeah", Seung replies calmly and caresses your back, loving the way you shamelessly bury your face in the crook of his neck and try your best to hide from Jongseong's strong gaze, "Yun's actually the one who pushed me to do something about it."

"That's my boy", Jay grins widely, only for it to drop just as quick, "don't tell him I've said that or he won't let me breathe. I'm begging you."

"Only if you don't tell Hoonie about this just yet", Heeseung sighs and you can feel the tension in his strong body, a wave of guilt washing over you in response to his reaction, "we're going to do it soon."

"Don't worry, brother", Jong replies calmly and shoots you both a soft smile of reassurance, "just know I'll knock those pretty teeth out of your mouth and shove them up your asshole if you hurt her."

After another round of chuckles and laughter, Heeseung sends you to your room with a soft kiss on the forehead and a gentle pad to your ass so you can get ready in peace while he takes care of the remaining decorations.

By the time you're applying your lipstick, your doorbell starts ringing, followed by loud cheering and yelling of your name.

It doesn't take long for Jaeyun to arrive after the girls had just sat down with their wine glasses, your brother's best friend just as excited and giggly about the newest addition to the friend grouo as the four of you and every time you meet Heeseung's gaze, he just shakes his head and smiles softly.

He likes seeing you happy like this. There's nothing as precious and pretty as your beautiful smile, the genuine one which never fails to light up your whole face, all the way up into your mesmerizing eyes in a way he's only ever seen when you're talking to your favorite people.

The fact he's finally one of them definitely warms his heart in just the right ways, something he knows he won't ever take for granted.

After almost an hour of arguing and high pitched giggles, your last two guests finally arrive and if it wasn't for your brother's best friend you all would have waited in your tiny hallway with big eyes.

As soon as your brother steps out of the elevator, a huge smile appears on your face and you can barely hide your excitement, only to bite back an actual giggle at the sight of their intertwined hands.

"Please don't make this awkward", Hoon suddenly says and rolls his eyes as you step to the side to let him and his new girlfriend in and just when you're about to spit back a sassy comment, you watch in awe how Ning gently slaps his biceps and rolls her eyes in faux annoyance.

"Be nice to her, Sunghoon", she says and finally turns her whole attention on you, her pretty lips stretched into a huge grin before she cocks her head to the side and pushes them into a soft pout.

"You're so beautiful", Ning begins and for some reason you feel awfully flustered by her comment, the feeling of comfort and safety spreading in your chest, "I saw your pictures in his apartment but I knew you'd be even prettier in person. I'm Ning Yizhuo but you can just call me whatever feels right."

"I'm in love with you." As soon as the words leave your lips you both burst into laughter before Ning pulls you into a tight hug, her pretty hair styled into a messy bun yet perfectly matching the vibe of her black dress.

Once the three of you finally make it into your living room, Sunghoon introduces her to the rest of the group, Ning shooting the boys a polite and genuine smile, only to pull the other two girls into a greeting hug the way she did with you.

The following two hours are filled with lots of giggles, breathless chuckles, excited story telling and unpopular food opinions, only for the discussion to be ended by Hesseung as soon as Yuna starts threatening Jaeyun with her fork.

Every now and then you find yourself in a conversation with your brother's new girlfriend, her big eyes watching you with absolute adoration as you talk about your childhood and youth. Once the boys make their way to your balcony to enjoy their after dinner beer, you pop open another bottle of wine for your girls and get comfortable on your soft carpet, your attention never once shifting from the three women in front of you.

Despite only meeting her a few hours ago, you can't help but feel awfully comfortable around Ning, something about her aura and vibe easing the nervousness and worry in your chest and with every word she says as well as her interaction with your brother you catch yourself incredibly grateful.

"Okay, enough about me", Ning suddenly says and sets her wine glass down, her big brown eyes finding yours as a light blush makes its way through her foundation and you can't help but admire how pretty she looks, "how about you? Do you have a boyfriend?"

And as if he felt it in his soul, Heeseung steps back into your living room just on time to hear her question, his sudden presence driving the butterflies in your tummy absolutely crazy and you hate how you can barely hide your physical reaction from the girls.

"I don't", you sigh and finally answer Ning's question, only for her to raise her brows in surprise, "I've been quite busy with university and work, so I haven't really met anyone who caught my eye."

Yuna chuckles and you can feel Ryujin's pretty eyes bore into your side, both of them more than just aware of your current romantic status, yet purposely not adding or commenting anything to avoid awkwardness.

"Really? I thought you and Heeseung were a thing", she suddenly says and within a second your whole body tenses up, yet you don't dare even side eyeing said guy, who's been standing at the door to your balcony for the past two minutes.

"Oh", you whisper and quickly clear your throat, "no, we're just friends. He's my brother's best friend after all."

You're careful with your choice of words, too afraid of giving any type of hint regarding your current situation and you can barely ignore the tiny sting in your heart.

"I'm sorry if I'm being dumb but does that forbid you guys to date?"

Ning's question lingers in the air for far too long and with a soft sigh, yet not a single word, Heeseung just shoots you all a tight lipped smile and disappears in your kitchen, leaving behind an even heavier tension than before.

"I don't think Sunghoon would be very happy about it", you mumble and pull your knees to your chest in hopes of hiding your sudden mood change, "he always said he'd never approve of me dating one of his best friends."

You attentively watch the way Ning furrows her brows in confusion, lack of understanding lingering in her gaze as she looks at you.

"Why would his opinion even matter?" Her words simply leave you stunned. You never thought you'd have this conversation with your brother's girlfriend, a lot of factors quite unbelievable yet here you are.

"He's my brother, my only family. I could never date someone he doesn't approve of."

"Well, I get that part, I really do", Ning begins and takes another sip from her wine, "but only if it's about someone who's a bad person. Why wouldn't he wants his best friend, someone he knows like the back of his hand, to date his sister? And from the way he speaks of Heeseung I can definitely tell he's a good guy, so why wouldn't he be okay with it?"

You let out a deep sigh because in every other situation, she's probably one hundred percent right. Yet in your current one a promise made four years ago changes everything.

"I don't–"

But you don't get to finish your sentence as your brother and his other best friends stumble through the door into your living room, filling the tension in the air with silly laughter and deep voices.

"We'll talk about this over coffee and cinnamon rolls yeah?"

All you can do is nod appreciatively in response to Ning's words, swatting Hoon's noisy questions away like a fly before he plops down on the couch right next to her, throwing his arm over her shoulders and placing the most gentle kiss on her temple.

For some reason you can't help but feel frustrated and angry. Ning's right and you know it, yet you're also aware of how different everything is for the two of you and the fact life had decided to make this so difficult for you leaves a bitter taste on your tongue.

You absentmindedly collect all trash and empty plates from your little coffee table, your head filled with thousands of thoughts to the point where you forget about Heeseung's presence in the kitchen.

"Don't do that, my sweet girl", he suddenly whispers, not moving an inch from his spot at your sink, his voice gentle and filled with this certain type of agony you've come to hate from how much it's been hurting the both of you, "don't go there. It breaks my heart to see you like this."

You sigh softly, the urge to steal a kiss from him or at least a little touch to ease your nerves almost overwhelming you.

"Why is life like this to us?"

Heeseung's chest tightens at the despair and sadness in your voice, something he has and never and won't ever get used to when it comes to this topic.

"It's gonna be okay, baby, I promise", he whispers softly and glances to the door really quick before he wraps his fingers around your delicate wrist and pulls you into his arms, "Hoon's gonna stay over at Ning's place tonight, do you want me to sleep here?"

Without missing another beat your head shoots up from its comfortable place in the crook of his neck, your eyes big and glossy, not as sad as just a few seconds ago and a soft smile on your lips.

"I'd love that."

Yuna and Ryujin are the first ones to leave around midnight, both of them complaining about still having to finish packing their suitcases, followed by Jongseong and Jaeyun, who have started confessing their love to everyone in the room to the point where Sunghoon and Heeseung had to force them into an uber.

"Do you want us to drop you off, Seung?", Sunghoon says and zips up his jacket, quickly reaching for Ning's hand, inly for her to chuckle when he accidentally goes for his best friend's.

"If you want to fall asleep in my arms you have to buy me dinner first, Hoonie", Heeseung chuckles, yet from the tension in his body you can tell how nervous he is and you can't even blame him. It feels like your heart is about to jump out of your chest the more you think about your brother's reaction to his friend staying behind to "help" you with cleaning up.

"And no, thank you", he begins softly, quickly shifting his gaze to Ning and you're surprised he seems to feel just as comfortable with her as you, "I'm gonna stay here and help Y/N with the dishes and everything else. You guys made a fucking mess."

You don't even realise you've been holding your breath for the past minute until your brother starts nodding calmly, inly for said breath to hitch in your throat as soon as his thick brows furrow.

"Just the two of you?"

A soft sigh of disappointment falls past your lips and you know the kisses and cuddles you had been looking forward to won't be happening anytime soon, the tone of his voice giving away his suspicions and obvious dislike.

"If you're willing to wake up extra early tomorrow so we can get back here together, then I'll leave with you two. But I definitely won't let her do all of that by herself, she's been working so hard all day." Heeseung's sternness and confidence, as well as his words of praise and validation send chills down your body, hot jolts of arousal making their way in between your legs and all of a sudden the yearning in your chest becomes even heavier.

"Park Sunghoon", Ning suddenly steps in and places her pretty, ring clad hand on his cheek, turning his head to meet her gaze just a little further down, "they do not have to ask for your permission. Heeseung's a sweetheart like that and your sister is as exhausted as beautiful as she is."

You can't help but pout at Ning's gentle words and the way your brother melts into her touch to the point where he doesn't even care about your presence and casually places a soft kiss in her palm makes you smile. A wave of relief washes over you and when you give her one last hug before closing the door behind them, you don't even try to be subtle about how much you've missed him.

"Come here, pretty girl", Heeseung quickly says and pulls you into his arms again, this time guiding you to the couch and offering his lap to you.

After hours of being so close to him, yet never once getting the chance to touch him, you welcome his sweet offer with a tired smile, straddling his thighs and pressing yourself against his strong chest, humming against the soft skin of his neck and inhaling his scent the way you always do after a long day like this.

"Is it silly to think that maybe Ning's presence will

make it easier for Sunghoon to accept us?" Heeseung sounds thoughtful, a hint of hope lingering in his words and you know how heavy this has been on him, looking at the guy he owes his life to and lying to him with every word he says can't be easy on anyone.

"No", you reply quickly, "I think she'll play a big part in it and I'm honestly so grateful. It's like she waited for this to come into his life."

Heeseung nods, but doesn't say anything else.

The following few minutes pass by in absolute silence. Neither one of you says anything, simply because you don't have to. The feeling of his body so close to yours, his pretty hands on your back and soft lips on your forehead are everything you've ever needed and for the first time in weeks you focus on nothing but Lee Heeseung.

Unfortunately life has never been this kind to you for too long and just when your lids are growing heavier, the ringing of your phone right next to you pulls you back into reality.

"Who is that? It's past midnight on christmas eve", Heeseung wonders, only for your smiles to drop simultaneously as soon as your gazes fall to the name on your display.

"Don't pick it up, Baby", he whispers and looks at you with actual pain glistening in his eyes, "he's just going to ruin your night."

You know he's right because there has never, ever been a conversation between you and your father which didn't leave you in tears, something you've come to learn rather early on in your life.

Yet, you can't seem to stop yourself from actually considering it each and every time.

Your father, as well as your mother have never been good to you. Years of verbal, emotional and physical abuse fueling the hatred and disappointment in your chest with each memory flashing through your mind, yet with a soft sigh you climb off of your lover's lap and take a deep breath.

There's this voice of your inner child which giggles and tells you to give it just another try because maybe they changed, maybe your father finally stopped drinking himself into a slow death and maybe your mother has finally realised you're her daughter and not her rival. In moments like these you simply ignore your inner teen, the one who can barely breath from all the pent up anger and frustration in her chest, because you'd give everything in your power to give that tiny y/n in your heart another glimpse of hope. Because...maybe, right?

"Hello?"

"Wow, the queen has finally decided to deem us worthy of her time."

And within just a single second, you watch your little self hide behind the big figure of your older brother in hopes of shielding yourself from their words, only for them to aim right at the freshest wounds.

You never wanted a relationship or bond with your parents, you just wanted them to treat you like an actual human being, something you've found hard to believe after all the times you and Sunghoon had to patch the other up because you accidentally had forgotten about one of the thousand task they had assigned you to before they left to pretend like they're the perfect set of parents.

"What do you want?"

Thankfully you've managed to perfect your nonchalant voice when it comes to them, knowing them well enough to hide your tears to save yourself from their poison.

"Watch your fucking tone, you brat", your dad hisses, his words barely coherent, letting you know about the unhealthy amounts of alcohol in his system, "we had no choice, you didn't get back to me in weeks."

All of a sudden your most recent phone call with your father flashes through your head and this time you can't physically stop yourself from tearing up.

Shame and embarrassment overwhelms you, instinctively turning your back to Heeseung to make sure he doesn't see the thick veil of tears blurring your vision.

"I don't have it", you whisper and nervously scratch the skin of your neck, subconsciously hoping to ease the action of breathing only for the knot in your throat to grow bigger with each touch, "and even if I did, Hoonie would never let me send it to you."

"Don't say that fucker's name when you're talking to me", your father spits, the single mention of your brother enough to set him off in the worst way possible, "fucking loser thinks he's better than us because he's living in the capital city. Have you two finally fucked your way to the top yet, hm? The least you could do is send us the money we asked for."

None of his sentences connect, yet each word manages to slice another blade through your heart and by the time you make your way to your dining table, you can feel the blood staining yet another part of your soul.

"What the fuck are you even saying?", you hiss and grab your head in absolute disbelief, your brain slightly foggy from all the anger and sadness mixing in your veins.

"Watch that fucking tone or I'll have to teach it to you."

A threat, one you've heard one too many times in the past few years, from the moment you can actually remember it all the way up to your last week before you finally moved away from that hellhole of a childhood home.

Unfortunately, the distance doesn't make swallowing it any easier, but for some reason you don't feel afraid or scared anymore. He can't get to you, not anymore. He'd have to pass way too many people before he could ever lay his hand on you again.

"Fuck you", you press through gritted teeth as hot tears stream down your cheeks and your chest is uncontrollably heaving up and down, "I don't owe you a single cent and I'd rather kill myself before I give you anything, you fucking drunk."

Your words are harsh and brutal and nothing but the actual truth. As much as it breaks his heart, Heeseung knows you have to do this on your own. He'll pick up your pieces after you've won your fight, no matter how badly he wants to rip that phone from your grip and tell your disgusting sperm donor a piece of his mind.

Waves of pride and worry keep hitting him one after the other and for the first time in his life Heeseung has felt absolutely helpless.

Watching the love of his life choke on her tears as she finally confronts the parent who had miserably failed her makes him fall for you all over again. He's never been prouder of you.

"Oh, will you look at that? The fucking smalltown girl grew some balls in the big, big city of Seoul", he cooes, mockery and ridicule dripping from every single one of his words and you find yourself wondering what the fuck happened in his childhood for your father to have turned into actual human trash.

You still remember all the times you had still written him a card for fathers' day, your tiny soul wishing for nothing but a crumb of attention and maybe even appreciation, only for him to crumble and throw it all into the trashcan alongside your cards, right in front of your eyes.

"Listen to me, you stupid brat", he suddenly hisses and pulls you away from those sad and painful memories, with the aim to carve new ones into your brain, "your mother needs that fucking money and we all know you have it. You didn't fuck all those little ceos in the making for nothing, did you?"

"You're mental", you breathe when his accusation hits your soul, heart shattering into even more pieces at the realisation what your father has convinced himself of.

He has never hidden his hatred towards you and your brother, his black heart filled with nothing but anger and wratch every time he looked at the two of you, only to lose himself in teh somehow relieving feeling of physically hurting two little children.

You could have forgiven him so much. The drinking, the disgusting accusations and everything he's ever said and broke your heart with, but not the way he has treated your brother.

All those times Sunghoon had cried himself to sleep after he had promised to become successful and save you, as well as Heeseung, from this shithole of a smalltown coming to your mind, too weak to remember the ones when the physical exhaustion from the constant state of survival had taken over his tiny body.

"Yeah, whatever", your father just grunts and the sound of him taking another sip from his beer sends shivers of disgust down your spine, "just send us the fucking money."

"No", you take a deep breath and aggressively wipe away the tears, straightening your back in the process despite the fact he can't actually see you, but knowing you're actually standing up for yourself, mentally and physically, is enough for you, "and I'm going to get a restraining order against you for both me and Sunghoon. You can't hurt us anymore, I won't let you. Next time you or that fucking witch has the nerve to dial this number I'm gonna call the cops on your asses and make sure to mention all the times you forgot to pay your taxes because you almost choked on your own vomit, you piece of human shit. Go fuck yourself."

And with those words you finally end the call, missing the red button twice from the shaking of your hands, only to fall to your knees as soon as the display goes dark again.

Before your brain can even process your panic attack, you feel strong arms around your shoulders pulling you into an even stronger chest.

"It's okay, Baby", Heeseung's voice is muffled from the blood rushing in your ears and if it wasn't for the close proximity you're pretty sure you wouldn't have heard him in the first place, "look at me, princess. Eyes on me, come one."

For some reason your body just obliges to his request without an ounce of hesitation and with short breaths you finally manage to lift your head and meet the soft yet slightly panicked gaze of your lover.

"There you go, good job", Heeseung says, his hands embracing yours gently, "we're gonna take a few deep breaths together now, yeah? Easy, don't rush yourself."

As he slowly guides you through the process of deep inhales and exhales, you finally feel your lungs filling with enough oxygen again, your heartbeat slowing down until it's back to its regular pace and your ears stop ringing.

"That's it, Y/N", the sudden use of your name sends a tiny wave of panic through your body and with teary eyes you shake your head.

"Don't use my name", you whisper and your voice breaks at the end of your request, "please don't ever use my name."

"Anything you want, princess", Heeseung responds once your words slash through his heart, "my perfect little angel girl. I'm so, so fucking proud of you."

You don't even register making your way into your room, only finding your road back to reality when Heeseung gently pulls your dress over your head, leaving you in the matching pair of underwear, yet never once shifting his gaze from your face.

You can tell he's on the verge of crying. It's Lee Heeseung after all. The guy who can't ever hide his tears when the people he cares about are hurting.

Your kind hearted, sweet souled first and only love.

"Don't cry", you whisper breathlessly, wiping away a single tear which had managed to free its way down his cheek, "don't cry, my love."

"I'm sorry", Heeseung tries his best to stay composed but after watching the way you slowly broke down, he's been cutting his hands on the pieces while picking them up again and yet the aching in his heart is what is on the verge of breaking him.

"Tell me what to do, princess", he begs. Heeseung is begging, on his knees right in between your legs, his head hanging between his shoulders as he seems...defeated.

A sight you never thought you'd witness in this or any lifetime.

No matter what life had thrown his way, Heeseung has always stood up with his head held up high. Even after all the abuse from his widowed father who had always preferred to use anything but his fists on a tiny, powerless Heeseung.

You can't even remember seeing him like this after having to endure the death of his beloved mother at the young age of ten, something he never talks about because of how much it still gets to him.

With a soft sigh, you take his perfectly sculptured face into your hands and lift his head to look into his eyes, your heart breaking into yet another thousand pieces at the discovery of his tear stained cheeks.

"I want you to distract me, Heeseung", you finally say after contemplating whether or not to take this road for the past ten minutes.

You know it might not be the healthiest and most romantic way to handle things, yet you know yourself well enough to be sure there won't be anything as strong and overpowering as pleasure.

For a second, Heeseung doesn't quite understand what you mean. You can malmost see his brain working through your request before his bambi eyes widen just the tiniest bit and his pretty lips part in light surprise.

"You want me to eat you out?"

Hearing him say those lewd words out loud never fails to send shivers down your body, yet this time you simply can't hide just how much they fluster you.

"No", you whisper and don't wait any longer to avoid any further misunderstandings, "I want you to make love to me."

Those are words Heeseung had never, ever dared to dream of. Even in his favorite daydreams and fantasies, he never allowed himself to step past that line, knowing it'd be too heartbreaking if he did.

Yet here you are, asking him for something so intimate, so special, so surreal, he actually can't find a single word to day in response.

"Unless you don't want to", you smile gently, aware of the heaviness your request comes with. He just talked you through a panic attack and broke down in tears in front of you, there's no way you could ever blame him for denying it.

"I've never wanted anything as much as that, Baby", Heeseung breathes, his eyes darker than just a few seconds ago yet still so full of gentle adoration.

"I just don't want you to regret anything, you're not thinking clearly."

His concern is heartwarming and absolutely valid, but the longer you look at him, the worse your hunger for him becomes.

"I'd never regret anything about you, Lee Heeseung", you reply confidently, "you're everything I've ever wanted and waited for. It'd...be an actual dream come true if you were the one to take my virginity."

"Oh fuck", Seung's sudden grunt buzzes through your body as he buries his face in your inner thigh and tries his best to adjust himself in his pants, still not quite used to how quick is body reacts to you.

However, it doesn't take him as long to regain his composure as expected because before you can even think about biting your lip, Heeseung's made his way back onto his feet, his big hands on your cheeks as he looks down on your seated self.

"Thank you, Baby", he whispers and takes a deep breath, grazing his thumb over your bottom lip before he gently pushes it into your mouth, the action sending a hot jolt of arousal straight into your cunt, "this means the world to me and I promise I'll make it worth it."

With glossy eyes, all you can do is look up at him as you suck on his thumb the way you've been daydreaming about his cock and as soon as you hallow your cheeks, Heeseung gently pulls his hand away again.

You quickly take the opportunity to reach for his belt, unbuckling it clumsily as adrenaline finally makes it's way into your blood and all those dark thoughts disappear from your head. The only thing you can think about and focus on is Lee Heeseung, just the way you've always imagined it.

"Is my pretty girl this impatient, hm?" His chuckle flusters you and you can't help but look away, yet never once stopping the movements of your fingers.

"You're doing so well, Baby", he praises you softly, caressing your cheek with the back of his hand, "go ahead. Take them off, I know how badly you've been wanting to see it."

You hate how right he is. Sometimes you really tend to forget how obvious your mannerisms and facial expressions are to Heeseung, but he can't and won't ever blame you because you don't know just how much he's been studying you from afar, after all.

"Stop teasing me", you sigh and finally unzip his pants, your eyes widening just the tiniest bit at the sight of the impressive imprint of his cock against the fabric of his boxer briefs and for a moment you try to remember if your favorite toy is close to his size, only to realise it's far from it.

"Come up here, princess", Seung demands softly, his hand wrapped around your arm as he pulls you onto your feet right in front of him, finally raking the time to let his hungry eyes roam your pretty tits.

"I have an idea", he suddenly whispers against your lips, only to leave your head spinning by pulling you into a hungry kiss.

You try your best to catch up, but after all these hours of yearning for this particular type of affection, you can't get yourself to care about muffling your little moans and whimpers.

The way Heeseung grazes your tongue with his own, exploring your mouth like it's the first time and savoring every drop in his own like it's an actual treasure leaves you dizzy in the sweetest way possible.

"Where's your vibrator, pretty girl?"

That question leaves you absolutely flabberggasted to the point where you can't physically close your mouth as you stare at him in shock.

"Don't look at me like that, Baby", Seung just chuckles, "I know you have a few of those little friends and I'd love to use one on you to get you as wet and ready for me as possible."

You pull your bottom lip between your teeth within an instant, several waves of arousal breaking down on you until you actually feel like you're drowning, all while you're mourning yet another set of ruined panties because of Lee Heeseung.

"It's in the back of the top drawer, left side", you mumble shyly and watch the way Heeseung's eyes darken, a sight you've grown way too used to in the past few weeks.

"Stay here, don't sit down, please." Is the only thing he says before he rounds your bed and quickly follows your guidance, coming back with your red vibrating dildo in his big hands and all of a sudden you're wondering if you forgot its actual size or if his hands are just that huge.

"It's so cute", he giggles and you quickly swat your hand against his chest as your body grows hotter in response to the sight of him holding your toy.

"As soon as you feel uncomfortable you let me know, okay? I'm gonna take it slow but just know I will make you cum at least twice before I fuck you."

All you can do is nod. There's not a single word left in your vocabulary and you're pretty sure you'd choke on your own spit if you were ro verbally respond to him.

"Wanna unbutton my shirt, pretty girl?"

Another approving movement of your head gets you a quick 'tsk' from Heeseung and before you can think about it too much, you whisper a breathy "yes".

Just as you're lifting your arms to get to work, the soft buzzing of your vibrator has your head shoot up with big eyes.

"Focus on the buttons, pretty angel", Heeseung whispers calmly, his empty hand finding home on your soft hips before he moves the one holding the vibrator closer to your clothed cunt, the anticipation leaving you completely frozen.

"Baby", this time his voice is a little less soft than just a few seconds ago, "I am going to pull away every time you lose focus."

"You're being mean, Seungie", you pout and fist the material of his shirt in your right hand, the other one still placed on the button.

But he doesn't budge, no matter how much he just wants to push you into the soft mattress of your bed and have his way with you, Heeseung knows he has to prepare you for what's to come.

So with a soft sigh you go back to your assigned task, your fingers quickly fidgeting with the little button, only for your whole body to tense up as soon as the vibeation sensation of your toy rattles through you like a heavy thunder.

A high pitched whimper escapes your throat, your brain clouded by arousal and hunger in the exact way you never knew how to satisfy, only to realise it would have remained this way if it wasn't for the tall basketball captain in front of you.

With shaky hands you continue to unbutton the next two, your thighs firmly pressed together as your juices make a mess in the center of your panties and you're genuinely surprised how easily Heeseung found your sensitive bundle of nerves when it took your previous boyfriends a lot of guidance.

You can feel his hungry eyes on every single one of your movements, yet you don't dare looking up at him, way too close to your sweet relief to risk disobeying his orders.

"There you go, good girl", Heeseung whispers and places a soft kiss on your forehead, "just one more to go and then I'll let you cum, princess."

And just when you thought this was about to be the easiest orgasm you've ever reached, Seung calmly presses another button to intensify the vibration, which yet again leaves you completely helpless.

You stare at the last button of his shirt with widened eyes, your bottom lip firmly tugged away between your teeth as you try to hold back the row of moans threatening to escape, only to lose the fight miserably.

"You're close", it's a statement, yet a threat lingers in his tone, "I'd hurry up with that last one if I were you, pretty girl."

For the nth time this evening all you can do is nod in response to his words, nervously fumbling with the button between your fingers, yet failing one too many times.

The sweet taste of your relief has coated the entirety of your tongue and you can feel yourself tiptoeing on the edge, patiently waiting for him to apply just the right amount of pressure to finally push you over, and as soon as you're done, your head shoots up, a sight Heeseung has yet to get used to.

Eyes wide and glossy, swollen lips parted as moan after moan rolls off of your tongue, your hands tightening their grip with every wave of pleasure overwhelming your sensitive body and just when he nods do you finally stumble head first into your orgasm.

It doesn't take a lot for you to fall against his chest with a row of strained whimpers, your cunt clenching in despair from the lack of penetration and touch.

"Such a good girl for your boy, aren't you, Baby?"

You can barely get yourself to nod, to overwhelmed by the intensity of your orgasm and if it wasn't for his strong grip on your arms, you're pretty sure you would have fallen to the floor already.

"Now, come on", Seungie says calmly, "get on the bed so I can eat that pretty pussy before I make it mine."

For some reason, his words bring you back to reality in an instant and with another soft whimper you lift your head and look ag him in a way he's been dreaming about for years.

"It's already yours", you whisper and place a soft kiss on his chin, "it's always been yours, Heeseung."

"F-Fuck."

For the first time in too long you can actually watch the way he loses his composure, yet don't get enough time to soak it all in before he pulls away and takes his shirt off, revealing his toned torso and the few little tattoos you had only ever gotten a glimpse off the past few months.

You try your best to ignore the one on his collar bone, the knowledge of it being a friendship tattoo with your brother easily pushing the guilt in your stomach back up to the surface and with a soft sigh you shift your gaze to his pierced nipples, something you still have to get used to.

You still vividly remember the picture Jaeyun had sent you three years ago of them at the piercing studio on a random friday night, after Heeseung had lost a bet and actually got them pierced. To the question why he never took them out aftereards he simply replied with a shrug and a short "I kinda like them" and that's how you found yourself staring at them each and every time he takes his shirt off.

"I'll take a picture and hang it in your closet so you can stare at that instead", Heeseung chuckles and loves the fact he can actually watch you grow slightly flustered from his words, "now get on the bed, pretty girl."

You don't know how much time Heeseung spends with his head buried between your legs, his tongue eagerly lapping up every single drop of your sweet juices as he teases your sensitive clit with your vibrator until you're a puddle of moans and whimpers underneath him.

His words of praise and affirmation barely make their way through the heavy cloud of pleasure in your brain and you're pretty sure you've cum at least twice in the past five minutes, just adding two more strikes to the list of tonight's orgasms. You know it's because Heeseung's scared of hurting you, yet the urge to finally feel him inside of you has taken over every fiber of your being, so with your last strength you tighten your grip in his dark hair and pull him up to look at you.

And just as usual, you're met with the sight of a drunk Heeseung, something you've gotten used to in the past few weeks since the first time he had made you cum all over his face.

Cheeks flushes, eyes glossy, pretty lips swollen and glistening with your juices just like his cheeks as well as the tip of his red nose and his chin.

"Please, Seungie", you whisper and look at him with big eyes, your heart hammering brutally against your rib cage from the constant waves of adrenaline rushing through your veins, "I need to feel you inside of me."

"Beg a little more, pretty girl", he suddenly says and gives your sensitive clit one last kiss before he comes to kneel in between your legs, his cock still firmly hidden behind the fabric of his boxer briefs and you can't help but whimper at tte sight of a rather big, wet spot at the tip of his length.

"Stop being so mean to me", you whine and throw your head back, reaching for him and finally getting to feel his hardness in your hand, even if it's through his underwear. Because despite the two of you having had shared quite a few intimate experiences, Heeseung has been vehemently denying you his cock just to make sure you know your pleasure is his absolute priority.

"Never", is the only thing he responds before he – finally – reaches for the hem of his boxers and slowly pulls them down his thick thighs.

With big eyes and anticipation boiling in your veins, you never once avert your gaze and realise you've been holding your breath as soon as his pretty cock comes in view.

Long and just thick enough to scare you, slightly curved towards his angey tip, veiny and about a shade darker than his actual skin tone. Lee Heeseung's cock is pretty. There's absolutely no other way for you to describe him and you don't feel ashamed about it at all.

Thinking about your ex boyfriends' manhoods, you can't really say the same thing and at this point you're pretty sure it's because of how obsessed and in love you are with him, but you never once imagined it to be any different.

A man as pretty as Heeseung could only have a pretty cock, it'd be a failure of destiny if it wasn't the case.

"Stop staring, pretty girl", Heeseung chuckles nervously and wraps his big hand around his shaft, giving himself a few good strokes and you can't help but press your thighs together at the sight.

"Do you have condoms?"

The question pulls you back into your bubble and with a soft sigh of disappointment, you nod.

In moments like these you definitely wished you hadn't stopped taking your birth control, yet after your latest boyfriend, you just didn't think all the side effects and hormonal struggles it comes with was worth it.

"Don't be so sad, Baby", Heeseung mumbles and reaches for the drawer of your nightstand, this time the one on the right, "one day I'll fill you up with my cum just how you want it. But it'll be to put a baby in that pretty belly of yours. So, you gotta be patient for a little longer, yeah?"

His words send hot jolts of arousal straight into your cunt, your need for him so intense to the point where you can't physically stop yourself from arching your back.

"That's my girl", Heeseung whispers and rolls the condom over his length in one swift movement.

"Considering the size of your cute toys, you do have lube somewhere, don't you, Baby?"

This time you simply roll your eyes and reach to the left side of your bed, quickly finding the bottle of lube you usually keep close when your little daydreams become too much and with a soft sigh, you hand it to him.

You carefully watch the way he squirts a good amount into the palm of his right hand before he yet again wraps it around his cock and starts stroking himself.

Heeseung throws his head back with a loud moan as he tries to prepare himself for one of his biggest dreams to come true after years of hiding behind all of the fantasies and mental images.

"Look at me, please", you whisper, too far gone to focuso on the shame and embarrassment bubbling up in your throat.

"Your wish is my command, princess. Always and forever."

Heeseung takes another deep breath before he actually follows your request, his hooded eyes finding yours as he comes to hover over you, reaching for both of your hands before he intertwines your fingers with his and pulls you into a soft kiss. One that holds all the emotions you've always dreamed of feeling in your chest during your first time.

Heeseung never once averts his gaze from yours as he reaches in between your bodies and lines his tip up with your tight entrance, his fingers finding your sensitive clit soon after, rubbing gentle circles into the bud as he slowly pushes himself in just enough to stretch you out the tiniest bit.

"I'm so in love with you, princess."

He suddenly whispers against your lips, his eyes filled with honesty and absolute pureness.

His words take your breath away and easily manage to shift your whole attention on him instead of the slight sting, tears welling up in your eyes when your brain finally processes his love confession.

"I've always loved you and there has not been and won't ever come a day where it's gonna be different", Heeseung sighs and you can tell he's trying to suppress his noises of pleasure as he pushes more of himself inside of you, his fingers not once stopping their movements.

You try to handle everything that's currently happening, yet your brain can barely focus on his sweet words as you feel yourself getting closer and closer to the edge with each sweetly painful push.

"There you go, that's my girl", Heeseung whispers and finally moans into your mouth when your seeet cunt suddenly starts convulsing around his thick cock in just the right way, your spongy walls adjusting to his size like they were made for him, waiting for nobody but him all this time.

For the first time in his life, Seung feels like cumming on the spot, barely half way inside of the sweetest pussy he's ever had the privilege of tasting, your sweet moans and whimpers nothing but music to his ears, a melody so angelic, he's actually convinced he's finally made his way to heaven.

"I l-love you", you finally manage to say, the words barely coherent as they're drowned by your moans and you're surprised just how good it feels to be filled in such an intense way, "I'm so in love with you, Lee Heeseung."

Saying these words out loud feels like an actual dream. In all these years of being in love with him, you never dared to even come close to fantasies like this, the aftermath usually too heartbreaking and devastating for you to even risk it. And yet nothing has ever felt as relieving and fulfilling as your first, and probably onyl love confession.

"Oh, fuck." Heeseung's voice is strained and raspy, on the verge of turning hoarse from his constant throaty moans which have been clouding your brain in the sweetest way possible.

"Do you think you can cum for me, Baby?"

You quickly nod in response, physically unable to form any proper sentences and just when you think you've reached your limit, Heeseung finally bottoms out and knocks the last bits of oxygen out of your lungs.

"Oh, my fucking God", you breathe, tears of joy and happiness stinging in your eyes and as soon as Heeseung's gaze falls on your face, worry washes over his soft features.

"I'm okay", you quickly reassure him, using your free hand to grab his cheek gently, hot tears leaving a burning trail as they slide down your temples, "I promise, these are good tears. I'm just – so happy."

"Me too, princess", Heeseung sighs and you're fascinated by the way you can actually watch a thick veil of tears appear in his big bambi eyes, "this is everything I've ever wanted. Thank you for l-loving me. Thank you so much."

You're so caught up in his sweet words, you barely notice how he slowly starts moving his hips, pulling his length out of your sensitive cunt just enough to elicit a moan from your sore throat, only to firmly thrust himself back inside of you.

It doesn't take him too long to find a steady rhythm, yet his movements seem sloppy and uncoordinated, his moans growing louder and deeper with every single thrust.

"I'm so fucking close, Baby", Heeseung grunts and buries his face in the sweaty crook of your neck, littering the skin in open mouthed kisses, "do you think you can cum with me? Or does it – ngh, fuck – does it hurt too much?"

"Can do it", you whimper and push your hand into his hair, grabbing a fistful of his dark strands and taking a deep breath as you focus on the pressure on your clit.

"That's my good girl", Heeseung presses through gritted teeth and finally pulls away to look at you again, "I'm so proud of you, Baby. My perfect little angel girl. My biggest dream. My first and only love."

And maybe it's all the pent up frustration, anticipation and hope, and maybe it's those last five words of his which finally push you over the edge, but as you stumble head first into yet another orgasm, you simply can't get yourself to care enough.

Despite losing yourself in the sweet waves of your high, you don't let yourself miss the opportunity to finally watch Heeseung reach his own as well, having waited too long to let this particular moment slip through your fingers.

With a row of moans and grunts, his pretty eyes roll into the back of his head, swollen bottom lip firmly pulled between his perfect teeth as he finally cums inside the condom, the sight so beautiful, you wish you could engrave it into your memories forever.

You don't know how much time passes until Heeseung finally gets himself to pull out, the overstimulation becoming too much for the both of you and before you can even think about doing anything, Heeseung comes to lay next to you and quickly pulls you into his arms.

"I love you so much", he whispers and presses a soft kiss to the top of your head, your lids heavy and the exhaustion of the evening finally catching up on you.

"I love you, too, Lee Heeseung", you whisper and reach for his hand, placing it on your cheek, "so much."

And as you slowly drift off into your well deserved sleep, Heeseung can't help but throw how head back as tears of joy and relief finally fight their way out and for the first time in his life something actually feels absolutely right.

He never thought he'd have the chance to build a friendship with you and yet here he is, his biggest dream now reality and after all these years of wondering why life was the way it was, he can't do anything but feel a wave of genuine gratitude fload his system.

You're his.

And he's finally home.

← 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 — 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 — 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 →

(A/N: After a whole week of absence, I came back with this big boy and really hope you guys enjoyed it as much as I did. I know some of you might think the sex part was rushed but to me it fits perfectly plus i really wanna write a little more smut in this fic and had to get to the point so yeah 💀 anyway, thank you guys SO much for all the love and support. sending everyone kisses. feedback and reblogs are always appreciated!!! 🥺🩷🧸)

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