#lol why do i have to have my emo phase in my twenties

[1d1195]

I feel like it has gone by quickly?? But at the same time THE CONCEPT OF TIME IS SO WEIRD TO ME I SERIOUSLY DONT KNOW ANYMORE LOL and Friday I was a bit busy :( it was a friends birthday so I out! But trust me I was ITCHING to pull up tumblr, read and talk to you! You know I love your book recs! And honestly that book sounds creepy! But you’re right I probably would end up reading it and liking it! Definitely added to my list! But I am surprised that you read it solely because you like “easy reads” , things that basically aren’t too stressful! Glad it wasn’t horrible though lol

I SERIOUSLY CANT LOOK THAT MAN IN THE EYES😭 when i turned in my exam to him my heart was beating out of my chest! And UGH IM A SUCKER FOR A HEIGHT DIFFERENCE LIKE MY BRAIN GOES CRAZY!! And idk he’s such a hot DILF lol and YES I DID SEE THOSE HARRY PICS AND I SWEAR I FELT LIKE DROPPING ON MY KNEES FOR THAT MAN😵‍💫😩 he looks so good it makes my head all fuzzy lol

Trust me I WAS CRAZY TOO!! All I wore were band t shirts and merch during my emo phase like I had no normal clothes or clothes that weren’t from hot topic bahaha and honestly I see why you were team Edward! I FINALLY saw the Twilight movies this past summer for the first time! I was never drawn to it when it was popular or the books BUTTTTT if I did have to chose I would have been team Edward lol there was no competition in the first place lol and yes I knew ALL the emo bands lore and stuff! Specifically twenty one pilots’s lore which is all lot lol but taht was like when i was 11 lol now i simply CANNOT due to lack of brain power lol

ANOTHER COUPLE MIGHT BE GETTING ENGAGED?! HELLO?! IM GONNA CRY FOR SURE!! And I’m sure part 4 will be great! You’re really great with coming with such detailed and unique! And you take such classic tropes and give your spin on it! I genuinely think you’re so talented Sam!

What’s crazy is that in my head I call you “ Samantha” when you literally do something crazy in your stories or like make me giddy?? Like “omg SAMANTHA!!!?” Idk if any of that made sense lol anyways Noah would have been cute! But Kyle is definitely more of a frat boy name lol and yeah I know about icebreaker never read it but I’ve definitely seen the girlies go crazy over it lol

My Kyle is literally so sweet! I met him at my schools IT services thing and he helped me out! Then I saw him again and he’s very nice!

And you know I love your long responses and I love you!!!-💜

HAHAHAHAHA I TALK TO MYSELF ALL THE TIME. I CONSTANTLY say “get it together Samantha.” That’s hilarious. I love that! If you’re inclined you gotta let me know which part/line in particular you do that for every once in a while 😭😂💕 please do not apologize for having friends and plans and being social. I’m glad you went out! That sounds like fun! My best friend and I are November birthdays so we celebrate the whole month of our births (our significant others LOVE it almost as much as we do, obviously).

The book was SO CREEPY. Stress level 12/10. So OBVIOUSLY I know the deeper meaning behind “don’t judge a book by its cover” but I’ve literally never picked up a book without judging its cover. Or at the very least the back cover. I’m pretty close with my sister so I often give books about sisters a thorough twice over. ALL THIS TO SAY I had no idea what it was going to be about when I picked it up hehehehe

Omg I could cry. Height difference, DILF, unable to look him in the eyes ughhhh I will also cry. I’m swooning just thinking about it 😭 I gotta write a professor/TA situation one of these days 😍😍😍

I don’t think I had an emo phase. A pseudo emo phase for sure. I never got into bands the way I was supposed to (but if I hear Fall For You I turn into a puddle). I’m obsessed with the image. I am spiraling at the idea you only saw Twilight last summer. I went to the midnight premieres I’m CRYING 😂

I have a lot of ideas in my head but they all boil down to happily ever after, marriage, 2.5 kids, and a white picket fence. I feel bad yall gotta keep reading the same story over and over 😂

Okay Kyle def is more of a frat name that was also what I thought when I switched it over. Noah was too cute I think hehehe maybe another story.

OBSESSED WITH YOUR KYLE MEET CUTE. CAN’T WAIT TO WRITE ABOUT IT 😍💕

Have a lovely start to your week bestie! 💕💕

Xoxo

P.s. Don’t read my update tomorrow if you’re having a good day lol I have been struggling with seasonal depression (I think it’s just regular depression actually at this point. But ya know) I am being dramatic honestly. Please don’t worry about me but regardless I’m probs going through an emo phase NOW hahahahahaha so it’s a little bit of a tear jerker imo

[colour-film-queer]

nothing just singing along to fucking sail a little too hard it's fine

#prsnl #post #lol why do i have to have my emo phase in my twenties #always thought blame it on my add was a funny line until i lived it lol

[twenty-one-froggy-pilots]

Yeah I'm honestly a bit surprised by how passionate and vocal people are about hating twenty one pilots? It's kinda upsetting that when I try to interact with content about them I'm always a bit worried in the back of my mind because I'm a pretty sensitive person and it's hard not to let stuff get to me.

I don’t know why it’s always felt like twenty one pilots has gotten a ton of hate for no reason? I’ve been into them since 2013-2014 so pure unadulterated vessel era, I’m a very old fan of them and their music, like one of the oldest picture in my phone is this

(This picture isn’t important I just love it, plus something fun to look at with a not so fun subject material)

(Long history as a fan rant incoming lol)

I’ve been an emo kid for a really long time, back when all of the emo bands were big, when seeing another kid wearing a panic! shirt always meant you talked to them in the mall, I still remember when I would wear the one twenty one pilots shirt I could afford outside, that anyone who knew who they were would come up and start a conversation with me

And it’s like through the years the hate has changed to be... somehow worse

Back in the early days tøp used to get called not a true emo band because they didn’t have anyone playing the guitar so everyone hated them because they weren’t emo Enough

Plus there was the whole ‘emo trinity’ ‘emo quartet’ infighting nonsense but that’s so long past idk if anyone even remembers it lol

Then blurryface rolls around and fans are being made fun of for dressing funky and going through that one fandom phase where everyone was calling the boys smol beans it was great and cute, we were all really close, we called each other frens, told each other to stay street it was great! So what people made fun of us or whatever we were absolutely vibing

Twenty one pilots felt like the coolest secret gang of fans, we were absolutely huge, more so than most people would think, and man it was awesome!! If you saw a tøp fan you knew that you were cool with that person and that person would be cool with you!! It was amazing!! Sometimes I do miss this vibe!!

But then Stressed Out ended up on the radio...

I feel like it really all changed here, all of the sudden the old fandom things were cringy, the boys were sell outs, and every family member you knew was suddenly the biggest fan despite only knowing stressed out

I remember being upset around this time because of strangers invading my space, this was my group, filled with people who understood what the lyrics meant and knew and understood how much they meant to all of us, and suddenly it was filled with people who didn’t belong

I didn’t blame the pilot boys, obviously they can’t control what’s on the radio, I’m fact, there’s plenty of pilot songs that mention never being played on the radio because of one reason or another, so my problem was never with the boys, it was with the influx of new people, and by new people I don’t mean new fans, I mean news outlets and tv show host, and with that influx came the people who didn’t get it, you know? That were rude and outright nasty and refused to understand anything about the genre and effort put into the story and why it mattered to us

(Tw for suicide mention, and uncomfortable themes involving people making fun of themes involving it, tw for mentions of school shootings)

All of the sudden we were the fans of Tyler Joseph the man who ‘Glorifies Suicide’ and actively is supposedly encouraging that behavior

We were the cringy fans everyone knew in high school and hated who were described as being ‘JuSt So QuIrkY 🤪’, instead of the mentally ill kids we all were, by people who hated us

We were the fans of those ‘white boys who look like school shooters’ (this one honestly rocked me to my core, it still hurts to even see??? Like idk why but it almost makes me want to cry)

At the same time a lot of the old fans were turning their back on the pilots, they didn’t want to be involved anymore, they hated ALL of the new fans whether they were respectful or not

It was a REALLY hard time to be a new fan, very few people were open to having them involved in anything, I think this is when a lot of hatred happened in the fandom not only fan-fan fighting/hatred but also fan-band sentiments weren’t great either

The more songs that ended up on the radio the more the hatred grew, in fact this got so bad Tyler did this

Here’s a transcript in case it’s hard to hear

Like... this was the state of our fan group.... it was suddenly cool to hate all the songs that ended up on the radio so much it affected every part of our music journey

There was a lot of infighting, it was an awful time to be a fan, new or old

Then came silence era, in which every tøp blog I followed except like 2, became kpop blogs and I’m not sure any of them ever came back lol, I actually really disliked kpop because of this for a bit in like a jokey kind of way in my own head lol (ahh how the turn tables have turned... kpop and tøp are the only things I listen to now haha, actually because of all my tøp mutuals becoming kpop blogs I vowed to myself to not change this blog to another group so I have two music blogs now, which makes me laugh but also shows how important music is to me so it makes me happy anyways you know?)

It was kind of a sad way to have the fandom disappear, everything was strangled, the boys were gone, and no one kept up with the fandom, it felt really lonely

When Trench era clues started back people started coming back, the mood was different, we had something to do and it was fun to work on something with others, we had the Clancy letters, and all the clues, and the tower of silence and the vultures!! It was great! It started to feel like we had rebuilt something from the rubble of what we had been

The fandom started calling Tyler stinky and he called us b*stards it was great, sometimes people were a bit meaner than I think they thought they were being, but it worked you know?

When the album released we had more people come back and things slowly started fitting back ok again, more songs ended up on the radio and a lot of older fans said the same things they’re saying now, but it wasn’t that bad, it was mostly very positive

And then we got to the over the summer drama, which........... is a sensitive subject, but I legitimately do not understand how it was Tyler’s fault that people assumed he was talking about something when he wasn’t talking about it at all... especially when people have been begging him for years to talk more about mental health, he wanted to introduce whatever he was going to do with a joke, I personally never though he was talking about the big issue at the time of the incident, but it blew up like wildfire and the next thing you know he’s canceled because Other People Assumed Something

So now it’s ‘Morally Justifiable’ to hate Tyler because he’s r*cist or something, despite it never being his intention and because people assumed something

It’s literally not even with good reason that people are doing this, but because it blew up when it did and about what it did, no one knows what really happened and people just wanted a morally justified reason to hate them because you can’t just dislike something anymore without it being justifiable I guess? I feel like with all of the years I’ve spent on the internet everything has only become more hateful...

All this to say.... yes, it hurts when people hate the things that you do, I get really sensitive about it as well, especially with how long and how many arguments I’ve seen, and I am extremely sensitive to discourse and hatred, it’s why I don’t engage with much of it online, in fact I was about to delete the post complaining about everyone hating on them before I saw it was really resonating with you guys

I guess my best advice to you anon, would to try to understand where it’s coming from, that’s what’s helped me, I know a lot of people dislike the pilots because of the fact that they became ‘mainstream’ during blurryface era, and people are really upset by that, so understanding that, even when it hurts, I can acknowledge that they feel that way and that it’s ok that I feel differently

It’s easy to take that point and test it against your own morals, ‘do I think twenty one pilots became mainstream, or only makes songs to get on the radio?’ If your answer is no, then you can both say ‘I don’t agree with them but they’re allowed to have their own opinion’ and kind of give yourself a wall and barrier against what they say

I know this isn’t perfect advice, but it’s helped me a lot

I know there are two big arguments against this album, that it’s mainstream and made to have radio singles (the underlying argument here I guess being Tyler and Josh are money hungry and no longer care about the music)

And that it’s no longer lyrically meaningful, but I think this has to do a lot with how involved people are in the Dema lore, if you’re not a fan of lore I would imagine this album being propaganda and supposed to be fake and bright to prove a point would really bug you if you didn’t really get it

To best thing to do is digest an argument (only if you can handle it emotionally of course 🖤) and know it’s ok that think differently than other people, and that the chances of someone being mad at you are very slim

A lot of things I’ve enjoyed have been stolen by the fear of getting hated on for something - while in actuality, the very few times I’ve gotten real hate over something barely affected me

I admit the fear of getting hate bothers me a lot more than actually getting it, but I just want to encourage you to stay strong in the face of it, it will pass, as it all does, but if nothing else in this post resonates with you, PLEASE HOLD ONTO YOUR JOY FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN! And don’t let ANYONE take it from YOU!!

If twenty one pilots makes you happy, just remember that the only person who can take that true joy away from you is yourself, remove the people who make you feel sad out of your life, I apologize if this is a physical person in your life as this makes it a lot harder, and sometimes impossible depending on the situation, but on the internet unfollow anyone, block anyone, don’t engage and leave them alone, it’s not with your energy or effort, and they’ll never change their minds but they can change yours you know?

Being sensitive in a time when everything is hateful is hard, especially when everyone tells you you’re a bad person if you aren’t engaged, but you really don’t have to be, you get to choose your own destiny you know? Don’t let other people choose it for you

#I’m am so sorry this post is so long and I still don’t know how to put readmores on mobile anymore #ajsjjams #I get told I ramble on about to much and that my stories are never concise and take forever to get to the point which might be true......... #I’m sorry #I kinda just rambled on forever but I feel like I finally aired out all my laundry I’ve kept to myself forever haha #it did have a point though! just trying to say like it’s always been a bit difficult but for the things that we love it can be #I’ve had a much better experience this era with the people I follow which has helped a lot #but to get to new content I’m digging in the tags which is where I’m #seeing all the hate so there’s kind of no avoiding it but I understood that going in you know? #anyways I think I’ve rambled on long enough! I hope this helped you out in same way?!?! #I’m not sure any of this is really helpful lol wjsks but one can hope haha #nic writes #tw suicide #tw suicide mention #tw school shooting #tw school shooting mention #tw racism mention

[fangsup-cobrastyle]

originally an ask game by @crash-cat, but as I only have one follower so far... I’m just going to answer them all for fun :)

RAWRING 20s ASKS

1. Are you more emo, scene or punk?

The goal was originally punk, but I’m definitely more emo.

2. Favourite band?

My Chemical Romance!

3. Any New Year’s resolutions?

Not this year. I’m just generally always trying to better myself.

4. Favourite music video?

Hmmm... “Liar” by Taking Back Sunday has always been my go-to.

5. Favourite song?

Right now, “Drowning Lessons” by My Chemical Romance. Of all time, “Jesus Of Suburbia” by Green Day.

6. Panic! At The Disco or Fall Out Boy?

Fall Out Boy

7. Favourite album?

American Idiot

8. Do you own a pair of fingerless gloves or skeleton gloves (or the combination)?

Fingerless skeleton gloves, yes. And some fingerless mesh gloves.

9. Do you own any band merch? If so, from what bands?

My Chem, Green Day, All Time Low... and Big Time Rush if you want to count them lol. I used to have way more in the way of shirts, but I outgrew them.

10. Got a jacket with pins?

A denim vest, yeah!

11. Have you got dyed hair? What colour?

Bright red! It was so I could dress as Party Poison for Halloween, but I decided to keep it.

12. Any hair dying or haircut plans for 2020?

I’ll probably switch to purple at some point and maybe try a black/red split dye. I’m planning on getting one of those cuts where it’s long on one side and buzzed on the other.

13. Crush on any band member?

Gerard Way, Ray Toro, and Gabe Saporta :)

14. Killjoy name?

I never settled on one, but my favorites on the list I made are Thrill Punk, Star Beam, and Sonic Sun.

15. Are you into The Used?

A little. I want to listen to more of their music.

16. Do you want any tattoos? Of what?

Definitely! The definite ones are: the “Origin of Love” tattoo from Hedwig and the Angry Inch; “I’ve lost my fear of falling” from “It’s Not a Fashion Statement”; my grandma’s initial in her handwriting. I’d also like to get one inspired by Carrie Fisher, and I’ve always kinda wanted a little heart on my wrist.

17. Can you play any instruments? Which?

I’m actually a music major and a musician! I mainly sing, but I can play guitar, ukulele, piano, bass guitar, and saxophone, and I’m trying to learn flute.

18. Favourite My Chemical Romance song?

Helena or It’s Not a Fashion Statement, It’s a Deathwish

19. Do you think Twenty One Pilots are emo?

Sure, why not? They’re as mopey as anyone else in the scene. There’s way too much gatekeeping.

20. Are you into Taking Back Sunday?

Yup!

21. Do you wear any make up?

Not much other than eyeliner, but I bought some black eyeshadow today!

22. Do you have black painted nails?

Not at the moment.

23. Have you got any band posters? Of what bands?

I have a ripped Green Day poster and a signed Care Bears on Fire poster (do they still exist?)

24. Do you want any piercings?

Maybe. I’ll probably get my ears pierced at some point. Maybe cartilage, maybe a nose ring, maybe eyebrow (although I’ve heard that one is really hard to care for).

25. What’s your opinion on All Time Low? Sleeping With Sirens? Pierce The Veil?

ATL - used to love them and still enjoy their music, but the whole thing with Ryan is awful. SWS - they were one of my favorites in high school, and I still like them. PTV - love them!

26. Do you think it’s just a phase or that you’ll be emo/punk\scene forever?

It’s probably a phase lol. I grew out of it the first time.

27. Favourite magical/mythical creature?

Vampires. Come on, I’m an MCR stan, what kind of question is this?

28. Are you into Black Veil Brides?

Not anymore, but I was super into them in high school.

29. Do you like any newer emo/scene/punk bands? Which?

Mmmmm I don’t think so. Does Mom Jeans count? 5SOS? Is 5SOS still new? That’s all I’ve got.

30. What’s your favourite music genre besides emo/punk\scene?

Pop

31. Are you into Mindless Self Indulgence?

Nope! I never listened to their music, and I know all about them as people thanks to Gerard’s choice to marry one of them.

32. Favourite Fall Out Boy song?

Bang the Doldrums... or The Kids Aren’t Alright...... or I’ve Got a Dark Alley

33. Are you mostly into the so-called “emo trinity” or “emo quartet” or do you listen to a lot of other bands too?

I am very much into the trinity, but I like a lot outside of them too.

34. What’s your opinion on Waterparks? Palaye Royale? I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME?

I’ve never heard any songs by any of them. Sorry, I’m not hip, but I’d like to be someday.

35. Are you into Bring Me The Horizon?

I don’t know anything by them or about them really.

36. Favourite solo project by a emo/scene\punk band member?

This feels like a joke, but Death of a Bachelor is essentially Brendan’s solo album, so yeah. That.

37. Are any of your friends IRL emo/scene\punk?

No :( but they are very supportive of my lifestyle choice.

38. Are you into drawing? If so, show some of your art!

I’m into it, but I rarely draw because I’m really bad at it.

39. Favourite colours and colour schemes?

Purple is my favorite color! Favorite set of colors is black and bright red together,

40. What are some of your favourite lyrics?

I’ve been building off of you / I’ve been texting on the freeway just to talk to you - Left at London, “Pills & Good Advice”

Does the television make you feel the pills you ate / Or every person that you need to be? - My Chemical Romance, “The Kids From Yesterday”

You take advantage till you think you’re being used / ‘Cause without an enemy, your anger gets confused - Elliott Smith, “Easy Way Out”

If I can make you love me / Maybe you can make me love me - Halsey, “I Hate Everybody”

41. The Black Parade or Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge?

The Black Parade

42. What’s your opinion on Paramore? Green Day? Blink-182?

Paramore - Honestly, I only ever really listened to Riot, but it’s one of my favorite albums ever. Green Day - Tied with MCR for my favorite band of all time. Blink-182 - I enjoy them a pretty moderate amount.

#emo #alt #alternative #music

[sacrificial-fawn]

Following are some questions I was tagged to answer:

1) What do you prefer to be called namewise?

My name, that or little ones made up on the fly that bleed affection.

2) When is your birthday?

October

3) Where do you live?

Somewhere I feel I don’t fit in- a city, I long to be in the countryside.

4) Three things you're doing right now

Morning stretches, eating healthier, sleeping a lot

5) Four fandoms that piqued your interest?

Used to be kpop/anime lol... I also had a brief emo phase when I was young.

6) Four things I'm a fan of though?

Sunshine, long grass tickling my legs, crackling outdoor fires during a soft snowfall, animals of all kinds, particularly fawns

7) How has the pandemic been treating you?

It has created a disdain for our leaders in me. Hypocrites and tyrants who kill the livelihoods of the weak. But I got very into cooking and baking so that is a plus. 

8) A song you can't stop listening to

Debussy- Reverie

9) How old are you?

twenty two

10) Do you prefer hot or cold?

Hot almost always.

11) One fact others may not know about you

I am very tall. 6ft/ 182 cm

12) Pronouns?

she/her

13) Biggest pet peeves?

Friends turning against the other at the flip of a switch, lack of maturity in relationships, hypocrisy without self awareness, dumbing people down to certain archetypes, lack of understanding of a large picture (why something is happening/why someone thinks a certain way), performative radicalization that is obviously only present to make one feel more intelligent than others or above others, the way I feel I need to be constantly accessed by text messages (i may get rid of my iphone soon). I have a right to my time alone!

14) What is your favorite "dere" type?

I don’t even know

15) Rate your life from 1-10

How do you rate something everchanging

16) What's your main blog?

This one!

17) Is there something people need to know about you before becoming friends?

I am sensitive and quite malleable and it is an aspect of myself that angers me. Trying to draw or get something out of me that is a reflection of your own opinion will make me retract. I believe firmly in allowing an individual to retain their own mental space however they so choose. 

[joonni]

BTS tag

Thank you @penicillinjimin​ for tagging 🥰

When did you first get into BTS? December 2015

Why or/and how did you get into BTS: I think I first heard Just one day, thought “cute but my heart is full of 2NE1″, then my friend showed me War of Hormone and I actually listened to Dark&Wild for a while but I really got into them only during Run era. I remember watching american hustle life and the first run episodes during that christmas break and I knew I was falling deep... 

First BTS song: as I already said before, Haruman.

Favorite BTS song: impossible to choose just one. I have a very soft spot for the eternal, seoul, trivia love, serendipity and I will always be a ho for rapline songs. 

First official comeback: HYYH: Young Forever. It was around the time I had my hs graduation exams and I really vividly remember waiting until it was over and dashing home to watch the Fire mv and freaking out at the “boy meets what”😂😂

Favorite era: the *iconic* H Y Y H, Run era to be more specific (everything about it was perfect)

Bias: Joon but like.. I love them all sm

Bias wrecker(s): everyone else?!

First BTS concert: let me cry in a corner for a few moments :)))))

Do you own any merch: I bought the Wings album (the poster was lost along the way ;;) and also LY: Her which I brought back from Korea myself = no lost posters. I also own a koya keychain and a small koya notepad and some unofficial photocards and pins. oh yeah also an unofficial hyyh sweatshirt, you know the ones they wore during hyyh concert encores.. yeah ;; 

What member would you say you are most like? I have a very similar music taste with Tae imo (he always recommends songs I already know lol), personality-wise maybe Yoongi or Jimin (I think they’re also both in slytherin) or even Joon as in I love cute things and get embarrased easily

Favorite BTS lyrics: I made a post about this!

Favorite Music video: oof.. I think I said Spring day before but I also really like BS&T and the short films :) they’re so immaculately done and I spent like a week analyzing them back then 😂

1 thing you love about bts: how do you choose just one thing omg, I love how honest they are and how they bring social issues to the light and actually do something about it (not just talk about it to gain exposure), they’re just wholesome humans and I have too much love for them

And to finish off wholesomely, do you have a favorite bts group photo, if so share it here (if not, what is your fav concept photoshoot and share picture:

Yeah I love them in a casual setting, just enjoying each other’s presence :’) So all the bon voyage ot7 pictures hit me in the feels

this made me so emo :( sometimes I can’t believe it’s already 2020

another thing I wanna say ramble about: when I was in my yg family phase I used to say things like vip forever, blackjack forever (yg is a terrible company but anyways) and I still am that at heart but with bangtan I really feel something more than just a fan’s love.. it’s complicated. Even in ten, twenty years I feel like I will cherish every moment spent with them :’) 

I’m not sure if you’ve already done some similar tags so if you don’t feel like it ignore me~ @memeofthesoul​, @sunflowerofficials​, @jieungi​, @bitoftaewithsugaandkookie​, @kookie-off-his-kookie​, @cultleaderyoongi​, @gukgalore​, @hobis-glasses​ 😊

#bts tag #personal

[artificialqueens]

break up with ur girlfriend (3/3) - dartmouth420

a/n: part 3: in which Raven makes an ethically questionable decision, Raja really doesn’t like mornings, absolutely nothing will crush Manila’s positive attitude, and Jujubee throws a curve ball

basically ye olde morning after weirdness

thanks for reading :)

Raven awoke tired and a little hungover in bed with Manila and Raja. She raised her head and sighed, then noticed the tall glass of water on the bedside table. She loosely remembered Raja padding out of the room just as Raven was drifting off (thoroughly fucked out and happy) and placing something on the bedside table. That was kind of her, especially considering the circumstances in which they’d met. Raven raised the glass and took a big drink, appreciative.

Raven sat on the edge of the bed quietly, not wanting to wake them. Maybe she’d go and make coffee or something. Or maybe she should just leave. Raven glanced over her shoulder. A perfect ray of sunlight was hitting the bed where Manila and Raja were still curled up, asleep, and whole thing was aesthetically glorious.

Raven wondered if what was about to do was ethical. But then she shrugged, and raised her phone. Also, she really liked them, and might be interested in seeing them again, so she held no malicious intent.

The photo she took was from a strong angle, consisting of the corner of her face, one eye visible, eyebrow raised, blonde hair smooth close to her head. Behind her was the bed, and Raja and Manila curled up, still asleep. Raja was deep in the covers, only one closed eye, her forehead and a streak her long grey hair visible. Manila was next to Raja, lying on her back fast asleep with her mouth open, the cover pulled up to her chin.

She hit send.

BITCH replied Juju, quickly, with about eighteen emojis, you fucked them both???

you bet replied Raven, smug.

Wait a sec, Juju replied. Then the second text came in.

ohhhhhh YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE IT

what?? Raven looked down at her phone, concerned.

BITCH THE GIRL ON THE LEFT IS MY SECOND COUSIN

The blood drained from Raven’s face, and she looked back at Manila, who was… well, a young woman who’s last name she hadn’t asked for and who’s social media who hadn’t checked out. But in a big, multicultural city like this who would’ve expected her to be related to Raven’s best friend?

fuckkkk

Juju sent her a text containing twenty laugh-crying emojis and one devil, followed by a vomit-face.

uhhhh, don’t be grossed out but she’s hot, replied Raven, who was finding the situation as distressing as it was funny. This new factoid raised the stakes, seeing this couple was no longer an entirely anonymous entity.

She mildly regretted sending the photo. Maybe it was an invasion of privacy.

BITCH DON’T TELL ME THAT ABOUT MY COUSIN

idk if anyone knows she’s gay tbh that whole side of the family is pretty religious

i didn’t know lol

oh shit I’m sorry… was just trying to brag to u about my conquest haha

why are u like this it’s fucked up lol

idk lol

thanks for telling me

but like

i might wanna see her again?

maybe both of them ;) ??? typed out Raven, hitting send with some mild guilt. She’d definitely need to sit down and think about this later. After she had some caffeine.

o really?

yeah…

aw <3

Raven smiled at the phone. She really loved Juju, they’d been best friends since college, and truly shared everything.

can’t wait to be ur in-law, teased Juju,

imma bring u really cheap wedding gifts

ur getting an off-brand slow cooker

BITCH!

anyway g2g <3 <3

hmu later <3

Raven got up and walked to the bathroom. She quickly rinsed her face and mouth. She put the unexpected information from Juju about Manila aside for now, and decided not address it. This really wasn’t the time or the place. Then she padded over to the kitchen. It was a bit cluttered, clearly well-used and loved.

There was an espresso machine on the counter, and Raven grinned. She knew how to work one of those, having done the time in her early twenties as a barista. While the water heated, Raven looked at the pictures on the fridge. There were kitschy magnets from a few places around the world, ‘Paris, je t'aime!’, and several photos, including two goofy school pictures of Raja and Manila respectively. Manila glared at the camera, about thirteen and deep in an emo phase, judging by her racoon-like eyeliner, back-combed hair and striped long-sleeved shirt. Raja’s picture was more innocent, a goofy-looking androgynous nine-year old with a big smile, round face and black hair sticking up awkwardly.

Raven snorted a laugh. She appreciated this couple’s sense of humour, displaying silly pictures on their fridge.

She sighed. She shared her apartment somewhat resentfully with two room mates. It wasn’t an ideal situation but it was cheap and because of that she’d been able to put aside some savings. If only Tyra would do the dishes every once in a while. Not to mention she was pretty sure Nicole had a crush on her, and she had to figure out how to let the other girl down easy. In fact, Nicole was probably taking her dog for a walk right now. Raven winced and sighed. Whatever, these were problems for Future Raven. Hopefully she’d find a better job soon, and move on.

The espresso machine was gurgling, so Raven moved over and dealt with it.

A few minutes later she snuck back into the bedroom with three cups of espresso. She was a little nervous, this wasn’t something she’d normally do. She was more of a leave immediately after sex or quickly in the morning kind of lover. But this felt like the right thing.

She put the coffee on the bedside table and sat on the bed, heart suddenly beating quickly.

The movement of Raven sitting back down on the bed disrupted Manila, who blinked her eyes open and yawned, stretching. The movement then woke Raja, who groaned and buried her face deeper into the pillow, disappearing under the duvet. Manila blinked and smiled sleepily at Raven.

“Good morning… oh! You made coffee!” said Manila, and she threw the covers off and made for the bedside table where Raven had put the little cups, “Oh my god, is that espresso?”

“Did somebody say espresso?” muttered Raja from deep in the blankets.

“Yeah, I made some,” said Raven, gently.

“That’s nice, you’re so sweet!” enthused Manila, kissing Raven on the cheek. Manila was shockingly perky, having been awake for less than one minute, “And I thought you were all mean and sexy last night…”

“She’s great. Keep your voice down,” muttered Raja.

Raven stifled a laugh, and sipped her own coffee. Manila crawled off the bed and threw on a robe, before sitting next to Raven and drinking her coffee in silence. Eventually, a long brown arm stuck out of the pile of covers that contained Raja, and Manila carefully put the cup of espresso into her hand. The arm retreated into the pile of covers almost cartoonishly. The only evidence of Raja’s existence was a small slurp and a happy sigh.

“I had a really nice time with you two, last night,” whispered Raven, putting a hand on Manila’s thigh.

“Aw thanks! I did too, and Raja as well,” replied Manila, quietly.

“Lovely, so… I can leave whenever, if you’ve got something you’re doing today-”

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” replied Manila, smiling so that the edges of her eyes crinkled happily, “Neither of us have plans, you can hang out for breakfast, whatever suits you.”

“Right, well,” replied Raven, her heart glowing a little upon hearing she was welcome to stay, “I really need to shower.”

“Mmm, I think I’ll join you,” said Manila, putting down her cup down. They both glanced back at the pile of blankets and pillows that contained Raja somewhere deep within it.

“Yeah, she won’t be really awake for a while.”

-

Of course, Raven ended up on her knees in the shower eating Manila out against the wall. A truly good start to the day, Raven mused to herself as Manila squirmed and gasped, throwing her head back with pleasure. What could be better?

When they were finally done, they found Raja in the kitchen, starting to cook. The older woman had put her hair up on top of her head in a messy bun, wore dark-rimmed glasses and an elaborately patterned silk robe.

“Your glasses are too cute,” said Raven, as she towelled her hair dry. She was wearing a borrowed bathrobe, one of an apparently infinite supply, “Anything I can help with?”

“No, just sit there and look pretty,” replied Raja, with an affectionate smile.

“That’ll be easy.”

Breakfast was insanely good. It was better than any breakfast Raven had had in a long time, and she’d certainly worked up an appetite. Raja could really cook. They hung around the table for a while, chatting away about plans for the weekend and this and that. Eventually Raven changed, slipping her dress from last night back on, feeling a bit weird next to the other two, who were wearing relaxed weekend clothes. It was time to retreat to her own apartment and chill out.

“I think I’ll call an uber,” said Raven to Raja. Manila was checking her phone, and Raja was putting dishes in the sink.

“I can give you a ride,” said Raja, shrugging.

“You sure?”

“Yeah, it’s no problem.”

“Okay, thanks,” said Raven. She supposed it’d be worth it to save the eight dollars on the ride.

“Manila, you want to come?” asked Raja, half-turning towards the other woman.

“Ah, no, sorry I have to make a call in a few minutes,” said Manila, giving Raven an apologetic smile.

Manila then engaged in a drawn out goodbye with Raven, leaving her with lingering kisses and an exchange of numbers. Raja watched from the door, lacing up her shoes, and raised a single eyebrow. Then Raven got her little purse and left with Raja. Her high-heeled club shoes clicked along the floor of the hallway.

In the carpark under the building, they approached an ugly 90’s style green car.

“Wow, this thing is ancient,” joked Raven, sitting down on the worn passenger seat. But unlike Juju’s car that seemed to be always covered in empty takeout containers and random garbage, Raja’s was meticulously clean. Raven didn’t have a car, but everything she did was comfortably within either cycling or public transit distance, and for anything that wasn’t Juju would drive her.

“Yeah, so everyone tells me,” chuckled Raja, shifting into gear, “But it’s reliable, hasn’t died yet. I made it through Hurricane Katrina in this thing.”

“You can drive stick?” asked Raven, curious, “Also… what?”

“Yep,” replied Raja, winking, “And I’ll tell you that story sometime if you’re lucky.”

“Hmm.” Raven was impressed and she eyed Raja’s tattooed hand on the gearshift as she confidently manoeuvred the car out of the parkade into the street. The bright sun burst through the windshield, and reflected off of Raja’s white Tshirt.

“So,” said Raven as they drove, after she’d given Raja her address. She felt a bit exposed, without any makeup on and her hair still slightly damp from the shower.

“So,” replied Raja, smirking a little at Raven’s uncharacteristic hesitance, “Manila gave you her number, right?”

Raven nodded, and then she had no idea why she said it, but suddenly it was out of her mouth, “It turns out I distantly know her.”

“Oh yeah? From where?”

“She’s my friend Juju’s second cousin.”

Raja stiffened at the mention, shifting the clutch and accelerating through the green light, “You know her family?”

“No. She just happens to be related to her. Juju’s my best friend,” replied Raven, inwardly cursing. Why had she even mentioned it?

“How did you find out?”

“Checked out her instagram this morning, realized the connection,” Raven lied quickly, guilt flaring in her stomach.

“Right. Well. Manila’s family is pretty religious,” said Raja matter-of-factly, but Raven could see lingering resentment in her expression, “Let’s just say they don’t approve of us and leave it at that. Maybe don’t mention this to your friend.”

“Of course not.”

“Good.”

Raven wondered if she could have handled that better. But then again, family was complicated.

They pulled up at Raven’s soon after that. Raven was having a hard time getting a read on Raja, so she decided to say exactly how she felt and Raja could interpret it however she so desired. They’d been quiet for the last few minutes of the drive. It was a beautiful day, thought Raven, looking out the window at the bright blue sky.

“Well, I had a great time with you two last night and I hope you stay in touch, I’d love to see you again,” said Raven, with a warm smile as she opened the door to get out.

“I had a good time as well,” said Raja, with a half-smile, “I, ah, just felt a bit weird with you bringing up Manila’s family. I’m basically suspicious of anyone who knows them since they’ve been so shitty to us over the years. But yeah, I like you too. Until next time.”

And then Raja leaned in and kissed Raven intently. Raven raised her eyebrows, surprised. And then Raja pulled back and gave her an absolutely filthy grin, and when Raven left the car she waved. Raven waved back and saw in Raja the same goofy energy as she’d seen in the childhood photo on her fridge. It was a bit of a shock after her cool exterior, but charming.

Hmmm. It seemed the night before had worked out in the best way possible. Raven opened the front door to her building and nodded pleasantly to her elderly neighbour, who looked her up and down disapprovingly.

Raven walked up the two flights of stairs towards her apartment, feeling thoroughly satisfied. She had work on Monday and a bunch of laundry and groceries and chores to do before then. Also, Juju would be back Sunday afternoon and she was looking to reuniting with her best friend after their brief time apart.

There was much to discuss.

-

The following morning she received a text.

You doing anything next weekend? :P

Raven raised an eyebrow and replied, new phone who dis

It’s Manila!!! Omg you’re the worst lol

that’s what they all say

hmmmmm i think i’m available friday ;)

Yay!! We’ll be in touch, Manila sent a quick photo of herself and Raja, a selfie in Raja’s car. Manila was sticking her tongue out at the camera and Raja was looking at something out of frame, light reflecting off her glasses. There were bags full of groceries behind them in the back seat.

Raven smiled down at her phone like a love-struck fool.

#rpdr fanfiction #raven #raja gemini #manila luzon #ravjila #lesbian au #fluff #drama #morning after #dartmouth420 #poly

[wenightmareyou]

Tag 21 Individuals

answer and tag 21 individuals i was tagged by @bluethisisforyou and @aerodynamicfry ! 1. Nicknames: i don’t think i have any? little rat man is a title i begrudgingly earned but i’m not counting it (i’m also not not counting it) 2. Zodiac sign: scorpio 🌟 3. Height: 5′4” 4. Hogwarts house: its always been gryffindor but i’ve been feeling so much more slytherin lately so whom knows! 5. Last thing I googled: sun bear. if you don’t know what they look like, please please google image search them, you won’t be disappointed 6. Favorite musicians: panic! at the disco, fall out boy, the 1975, taylor swift, my chemical romance, twenty one pilots. emo “phase”? i don’t know her 7. Song stuck in my head: “i’m only me when i’m with you” by taylor swift 8. Following now: 432 9. Followers: 715 10. Do I get asks: lol no 11. Amount of sleep: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 12. Lucky number: 95 13. What I’m wearing: pajamas 14. Dream job: anything that helps people, right now i want to be a lawyer but anything more specific than that?? no idea 15. Dream trip: australia, new zealand, or anywhere to see the northern lights 16. Favorite food: ooh right now its probably pad see ew but it changes a lot 17. Instruments: none! 18. Languages: English 19. Favorite song:  “Brother” by gerard way 20. Random fact: i once memorized the entire first chapter to the hunger games over a spring break. why? i have No Idea 21. Aesthetic: abandoned malls, slightly cursed vintage jewelry, modern cryptids. fashion-wise, i have no clue, whatever looks good at the moment so i’m definitely not tagging 21 people but! i’m tagging cool mutuals, feel free to ignore this lol @allthesethings-thativedone @llunation @captain--westenra @vandaysjoe @dumb-thot-crowley and anyone else who wants to do it!

#my post #tagged

[lovemesomesurveys]

S/O to @iaintgotcontrol for finding a new survey! lol.

Looks and Personality

What do you look like? I have a face with freckles, brown eyes, a nose, and a mouth. I wear black rimmed glasses. I have long hair that goes past my butt. I naturally have dark brown hair, but I dye it red. I’m thin. Gangly.  How often do you bathe? I don’t take baths, but I shower every 1-2 days. How do you wear your hair? In a pony tail.

What colours do you tend to wear? I have a lot of black and gray with pops of other colors. Do you have any tattoos? What, where and why? No.

What kind of clothes do you wear? Comfy, casual clothes. I’m always in leggings and a comfy shirt. I own a LOT of leggings and graphic T’s.  What kind of jewellery do you wear? I haven’t worn any in years. I used to wear these 3 rings I have 24/7 until one day I took them off for some reason and just never put them back on since. That was probably like 5 years ago. I went through a phase where I was all about accessorizing and wore a ton of bracelets. I wore necklaces and earrings, too. Is there anything else you often wear? I’m always wearing socks. Would you say you had a “look”? I’ve gone through different phases like the preppy/girly and emo phase, but now I’m just very casual and comfy. When going out, do you dress up or down? My going out consists of going to the doctor, the movies, or Walmart. I don’t dress up for any of those things.  What do you wear to bed at home? Those comfy, causal clothes I’ve been talking about. What do you wear to bed when your somewhere else? Same thing. Is there a place you keep any prized/secret things whilst you’re away? No.  What’s your favourite food? Chicken tenders, boneless chicken wings (garlic parm), burritos, potatoes in various forms, eggs, spaghetti, meatballs, and pesto pasta. What’s your favourite drink? Coffee. What’s your favourite desert? Donuts, cupcakes, muffins. What’s your favourite type of food (e.g Mexican)? American, Italian, and Mexican. Do you have any mental problems? Yes. Do you have any phobias? What? Why do you think you have this/them? Yes. Why might somebody dislike you? Because I keep to myself these days and have been very distant and withdrawn from everyone outside of my immediate family. I’m very moody. I don’t put any effort into maintaining friendships anymore. Or any effort into much of anything. I haven’t been a good friend at all to the friends I used to have.  What skill do you possess that you are most proud of? I don’t feel like I have any.  What is your greatest strength (e.g. honest, loyal, brave)? I... don’t know. What’s your greatest shortcoming or flaw (e.g. cowardly, alcoholic)? I have a lot of those. Who do you most admire? My mom and younger brother. Who do you most love? My family. What three things do you look for most in a partner? Good sense of humor, understanding, patient.  Do you like crowds? Nooo. I don’t well with crowds. What are your hobbies? Tumblr/surveys, watching YouTube, coloring, reading, watching TV. If you can’t get to sleep in the middle of the night, what do you do? So every night? At night I do my Bible study, watch YouTube, watch TV, and read. What is your favourite animal? Dogs and giraffes. What is your favourite colour? Pastels. If you could ask God (to athiests - IF there was one) one question, what? I mean, there’s a lot I’d like to know but some things we aren’t meant to know or are beyond our comprehension. Things will be revealed when they’re meant to, if they’re meant to be. Rate yourself on these traits from 0 to 10. 0 - do not possess this trait. 10 - you have great amounts of this trait. Calm temper Charm Cheerfulness Confidence Courtesy Curiousity Forgiveness Generosity Greed Helpfulness Honesty Loyalty Optimism Patience Self-sacrafice Wit Background Where were you born and raised? California. Briefly describe your family. Loving, supportive, encouraging, funny.  You must choose one - your childhood was calm/peaceful or tragic/turbulent? Calm and peaceful out of these choices. I had obstacles and struggles with health related things, but honestly those aren’t what stick out the most to me. I was a very resilient, strong kid. I’m a very weak, scared adult.  Did you have any rolemodels? My mom and grandma. What is the worst thing that has ever happened to you? I’d say the incident that made me a paraplegic at 7 months old takes home the trophy for that category.  How did it affect you? In every single way from that day forward. Have you ever had any recurring nightmares or themes in nightmares? Yes. As a kid I remember one of the reoccurring nightmares I had was Ghostface chasing me with a knife. I was so scared of Scream for the longest, but I love the movies now. ha. What were they? Death and being chased. Do you currently have a boyfriend/girlfriend? No. Do you have any close friends? I have my family. Briefly describe your best friend: My mom is so strong-willed and hardworking. Very giving. Very outgoing and social. She’s also very funny and sarcastic. She loves her some ID (Investigative Discovery) and Game of Thrones. Any enemies? No. Who? What are they like? Would you risk your life for your best friend?(not lover or family member!) My best friend is a family member, though. And yes. With who was your most important romantic relationship? I haven’t had a serious relationship. Of what are you most proud? :/ Of what are you most ashamed? The person I’ve become over the last 4 years. I really hate this person I’ve become.  Alignment, Ethics and Religion What is your religion? Christian. Where do you stand on abortion? Where do you stand on the death penalty? I’m on the fence. Where do you stand on wearing fur? I don’t wear fur or use real leather. Do you have a moral code that you follow? What? I mean, yes? Could you kill somebody? I can’t ever imagine myself being able to do that, but it’s something you don’t really know unless you find yourself in a situation that could lead to that. For what reason would you kill somebody? The only reason I could think of is self-defense, but even then I still can’t imagine killing someone.  Would you SERIOUSLY CONSIDER killing anybody right now? No, sheesh. Do you trust easily, or not? Trust isn’t a big issue with me, I just have a hard time opening up and expressing myself to people and sharing my feelings. What are your political beliefs (anarchy, communism, democracy etc.)? What, if anything, WOULD you sacrifice your life for? If it meant saving a loved one. Would you ever, for any reason, abandon your friends in an hour of need? That’s what I’ve done over these last few years. :( Motivation

What are your dreams/ambitions/goals? That’s the problem... I don’t have any. How do you plan to reach them? How would your ideal partner look? Not say looks don’t matter at all, but I’m more concerned with personality.

Do you ever want to have a family someday? With children? I can’t see that happening. Who would you want to start this family with, or do you not yet know? What would stop you from reaching your goals (e.g. death, retirement fund)? My health. What do you see yourself doing next year? I have to take it day by day, hour by hour, man. What do you see yourself doing in twenty years? Yikes. Would you ever have an affair? No, I truly don’t think so. Would you ever have a one night stand? No. What are your greatest fears? Losing my loved ones. More information If you had a month of nothing (no work, no obligations) what would you do? That’s been my life for the past few years and it hasn’t been a good thing. It dug me in a deep hole for depression. How do you relax? Listen to ASMR. What one thing would you change in this world (free Tibet, abolish Sweden)? No more violence.  Would you ever choose a career or job where your life was at risk? No. Why? How would you like to be remembered after your death? “When my time comes, forget the wrong that I’ve done, help me leave behind some reasons to be missed.” Random questions Where you present at any major historical events (e.g. 9/11)? No. How did they affect you? Do you have any famous relatives? No. Do you have to try and live up to your family’s expectations? My family doesn’t put any ridiculous or impossible expectations on me. All they want is for me to be healthy and happy, but for some reason I can’t seem to get my shit together and take care of myself like I should. Are you a loyal member of any organizations? No. General Information Name: Stephanie. Age: 29. Date Of Birth: July 28th. Race: Caucasian, Mexican, and some Filipino that I know of. I really want to do one of those DNA tests to see exactly what I am. Height: I’d be about 5′4. Weight: Mid 70s (lbs). Are you happy with this? No. I need to put on some weight. Desired weight: I used to be mid 80s-low 90s. Sexual orientation: Straight. First language: English. Second/Third/Fourth etc. languages (if any): I’m only fluent in English. Why did you take this survey? I hadn’t taken it before and I wanted to do a survey.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

[coalessscence]

The Big Mun Questionnaire Thingamajig— answer these questions then tag 20 blogs you’d like to know better!

tagged by: @patiencetaught !! thank u sm my babe! tagging: UHHH ok imma try my best here, @zerotoherc, @gentlegently, @dvstv, @infcrtunii, @gvtshct, @skepticspooked, @skepticreal, @kradljivac, @bruadcr, @prctextlve, @amourfugitif, @keepgcing, @17escapes, @scaredvicious, @surrepo-iuvenisdomina, @withhclding, @femmeveined, @dyingthing, @thriceflamed, @axisii I THINK THATS 2O OF U and uhhhh whoever else wants to ???

nicknames: none that i know of?

zodiac: libra

height: 5′ 2

time: 9:24 a.m.

favourite band / artist: it’s hard for me to have just One (1) fave but if forced to arbitrarily make a choice i will say currently working fave is a toss up between panic! at the disco and marina & the diamonds, all time fave regardless of the fact that they are not together anymore is triumph, and/or rik emmet as a solo artist after triumph broke up, even though he’s now getting ready to retire

song stuck in my head: literally was humming “fuck up” by shane dawson all last night and this morning. i am currently listening to twtltrtd (its a panic album that has a long ass name dw abt it lol) so technically its not in my head rn but im sure it will be later.

last movie i saw: in my psych class we had to watch that movie with all the emotions in the girl’s head that the “do you ever wonder what is going on inside someone’s head” meme is from what is it called akdhffhg UPDATE: after much meme googling the last movie i saw is called inside out

last thing i googled: literally the entire text of the what is going on inside their head meme to find the name of that movie lol but before that, it was ‘sniper elite 3 siwa oasis’ bc i was looking smth up for my dad who was stuck on a level in a video game lol

other blogs: i no longer have any other rp blogs, just this one!

do i get asks: sometimes i do get memes and sometimes i even get those kindness campaign or similar messages which is hella rad and y’all are a buncha babes ok ily

why did i choose this username: uuuuh so basically i had like, a LOT of single muse blogs and brought them all together to this multi. so the word coalesce was relevant bc to coalesce means “to come together, to form one mass or a whole”. coalescence is like, the verb?? version of that word ??? idk how grammar works but basically thats the other tense of coalesce and it looked pretty so i chose it. then i just added S’s until the url wasn’t taken and here we are lol

following: 709 i need 2 stop

average amount of sleep: like, 5-6????

what i’m wearing: normally i make an effort to display Style and Fashion (tm) but atm i’m in pajamas lol rip i guess

dream job: i rly want to be an entertainer ???? like idk. i wanna have a youtube channel. i wanna get to work on tv somehow, i wanna be on a radio show or podcast, i wanna write a book,  i wanna put out an album and tour on it, i wanna be a model. i wanna build my own career based on doing a lot of different kinds of things that are fun for me to do and even more fun for other people to consume as content/media, but find the common thread in all of those things being my brand??? which sounds literally crazy i know but idk. with the internet doing what the internet has done for everyone i think its more possible now than ever so who knows. but i’m going to school for computer science so idk if that will EVER happen lol

dream trip: i honestly don’t know.... there are places i wanna go, like japan, but idk. i RLY wanna do that thing where you go from one end of the US to the other on the amtrak train with a good friend ??? and just see my own country and stop off in stations in little towns and see what people’s lives there are like ??? i just think that would be really neat. i’d make a video series about it.

favourite food: nearest food. nearest food is favorite food.

play any instruments: kind of sort of guitar/ukulele/piano also does singing count as an instrument? but at the same time god help me i probably sound terrible at all of them in reality so dont bet on it

eye colour: brown

hair colour: just as brown

languages you speak: english, know some very basic basic spanish and i barely know like five words and 2 of the 3 alphabets in japanese (one day when i have time to do things and can spend less time being Stressed & Depressed (tm)  i would like to be halfway fluent in spanish, japanese, korean, and hawaiian. if the resources become available to do so i would love to learn pottawatomie as well, which is the native language of the tribes where i am from, which is a big part of the culture there still (tho there are dwindling native speakers of the language itself and not a lot of resources atm, altho conservation efforts are being made).

most iconic song: im gonna be honest with you, the first thought i had upon reading this was all star, and i cant say im fully committed but im not gonna sit here for twenty minutes analyzing this answer so ????? its all star fight me

random fact: i need to wash my heckin makeup brushes more often bc damn im a Mess

describe yourself as aesthetic things: a pastel pink shirt that reads ‘empty inside’ in fanciful cursive. bright 80s colorblocking covering the void in your soul. white and gold christmas decor that’s still up mid january. a bed that used to be made but was rumpled by sitting on it. getting a hand cramp from taking notes with a glitter gel pen. a collection of handcreams in various airy scents. a heaviness in your bones that you can’t escape from. the fallout from rainbows of makeup smeared onto a desk. paint chipping off where your wrists touch a laptop from overuse. an adorable hair ribbon paired with a leather jacket. the tragedy of emotion. self deprecation that edges into mirth. being self aware of an unhealthy nature. kawaii smeared by the remains of an emo phase that never happened and invaded by the jewel toned velours of modern day culture.

#that aesthetic tag section is way too dramatic lol but listen...... i Tried Hard #and i think its accurate #ANYWAYS #THANK U FOR TAGGING ME MY BABE SORRY IT TOOK ME 10 YEARS TO DO IT #⌲ t a g s #⌲ m u n t h i n g s #⌲ m u n s p e a k #⌲ o o c #⌲ i don't wanna feel Q U E U E anymore

[artsyallouette]

Tag Game!

Ask Game

Tagged by @galactic-polywag !

Name: Callee

Nicknames: Callee is my nickname, not saying my real name, there’s not enough of us for me to hide in lol. I go by “Allouette” or “Something” online, as well.

Gender: Female

Zodiac: I’m a Cancer!

Height: 5’5

Time: 4:38 pm

Favourite musicians: Area 11, My Chemical Romance, Panic! At The Disco

Song stuck in my head: Lately, it’s been The Monkees’ “Daydream Believer”

Last movie I saw: I’m currently watching “The Little Mermaid” (2018), but the most recent one I’ve finished is “Annie”

Last thing I googled: I cannot remember. I think the molar mass of sulfuric acid? Gotta love chem class

Other blogs: @catkillingcannibal, left over from my rp phase, please don’t check it out lol, @whoneedscontextanyways, full of quotes from my friends, and @fake-yogs-quotes

Do I get asks: Not often, once in a blue moon. I really like to!

Why I chose the username: Linkin Park’s “Somewhere I Belong”, there’s a line that goes: I want to heal, I want to feel, Like I'm close to something real, I want to find something I’ve wanted all along, somewhere I belong. 1337 is not because I’m a gamer, it was the code for the force field around the nuke in the Minecraft series “ The Blackrock Chronicles” by Rythian on YouTube, actually! The series is permanently unfinished, but you should still go watch it if you haven’t, it’s amazing.

Following: Too many, haha. 328

Amount of sleep: About… 7 hours? Which is… not bad actually.

Lucky number: I don’t really have one!

What I’m wearing: Jeans, flannel, tank top and sweater.

Dream job: I am in school to become a chemistry teacher!

Dream trip: I would love to go to France, honestly, or to visit all my online pals! Or both!

Favourite food: I like sushi and tacos

Favourite instruments: I like the piano, which is kinda boring, I know.

Favorite songs: I’ll save some time and just list my favourites by each of my aforementioned favourite bands, but I love a lot of songs. Area 11’s would be Panacea and the Prelogue, My Chemical Romance would have to be… The Light Behind Your Eyes or Famous Last Words, and for Panic! At The Disco, I would have to say Roaring Twenties or Dying In L.A.

Tagging: @spiritedandloyal , @endingfury , @gingeraflame ,@anxious-emo-nightmare and... I’m not sure who Ree already tagged but if anyone from the discord wants to do this, go for it!

#tag game

[survey--s]

234.

Do you like McDonald's sprite? Isn’t it just normal Sprite? lol. It certainly is in the UK anyway. 

What age did you start becoming more independent? I mean, don’t most people just become more independent as they grow up? I guess the biggest changes were when I went to university at 18, when I moved in with Chris in my twenties and when I moved out and got married.

Do you ever just dance around the house? Yeah, normally when I’m doing the housework.

List 5 things you need to do soon. - get a good night’s sleep - sort out the grocery shop tomorrow - message Lisa to ask her to re-send the contact info for Monty - order a riding hat and boots - I can’t think of much else. I need to remember to put suncream on tomorrow if that counts as a thing, lol.

What do you do when you start to feel sad? It depends on where I am and what the reasons are.

Have you ever been to a metal concert? No, that’s really not my thing.

Do you like metal? I went through a phase of liking some of it as a teenager but it doesn’t really appeal to me anymore.

What's your favorite Christmas movie? Love Actually, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Home Alone (1 and 2) and Elf.

What about Halloween movie? I don’t like scary movies but I like the Addams Family.

Do you like the taste of cilantro? It’s fine but I wouldn’t choose it deliberately or anything like that.

Have you ever busted a window accidentally? Nope.

Do you remember those Bratz dolls? I was too old for them, but yeah, I remember them.

What was the last thing to bum you out? Working a load of stupidly long days in a row with no break.

What is your summer anthem? Summertime by Bon Jovi.

Do you enjoy apples? Not really. I like the taste but the texture can be really funny sometimes.

Have you ever made apple butter? Do you like it? No, but I love the idea of it.

Do you own any pocket knives? Not personally but we have several lying around at home.

On a scale of 1-10...How happy are you and why? An eight - I’d be happier if I wasn’t so tired, lol.

Do you think diamonds are overrated? Yeah, I think coloured gemstones are much nicer.

How many languages can you greet somebody in? French, English, Spanish, German, Italian and Japanese.

Do you have a favorite planet? Yeah - Saturn.

Do you know how to play the flute? Nope.

What do you enjoy putting in your smoothies? Raspberries, bananas, blackberries, strawberries.

What's a medication that has really helped you? Sertraline.

Do you forgive easily? Yes, but I don’t forget.

Have you ever broken up with somebody? Yes. It was horrible both times, but it needed to be done.

What was the biggest phase you went through when you were younger? As a kid I was obsessed with beanie babies, and then as a teenager I definitely went through what would be called an emo phase.

Is there something you've been hiding from someone? Not that I can think of.

Do you believe in demons? No.

Have you ever seen a spider consume another spider? Not in real life, but on documentaries and stuff.

What's your favorite fruit? Raspberries and melon.

Do you ever go clubbing? Not anymore - I did when I was younger though.

Have you ever been to a church camp? Nope.

Have you ever accidentally swallowed something you shouldn't have? Yeah, as a little kid I swallowed two 5p coins, lol.

Last book you remember enjoying? Alice by Christina Henry.

When was the last time you got scared? I can’t remember the last time I truly felt scared.

Have you ever seen a boy band live? Not in the typical sense. I mean, I’ve seen all-male bands, but not your stereotypical “boy bands”.

When was the last time you drank water? After work, so about six hours ago. I have an unopened bottle next to me at the moment though.

Have you ever been dehydrated? Yeah, and I got really unwell from it. 

Have you ever shot a gun? Nope.

Do you use Facebook? Yeah, I run my business through Facebook.

Would you say you're well educated on religious topics? Not really, no.

What's the longest you have walked at once? I walked a Marathon in a day once. My feet were SO sore and covered in blisters by the end. It wasn’t intentional - my dad got us horrendously lost in Austria lol. We ended up in this tiny village and having to use a phone in a café to call a taxi - and I remember the owner took pity on me and gave me lemonade.

Do you ever take those Buzzfeed quizzes? I used to but I never really visit Buzzfeed anymore.

How long was your last phone call? According to my phone, about two minutes long.

Are there a box of tissues on your bedside table? Nope.

Have you cut your hair recently? I cut my hair around January time, I think.

Do you like skittles? I do.

What is your favorite kind of cheeto? (spicy, regular, puffs.. etc.) I’ve only ever tried the regular ones, and they were good. I’m not a fan of anything spicy anyway.

Do you have a skin care routine? Nope.

Do you know how to write in cursive? Yeah, of course.

What's the closest thing to you that is pink? I’m wearing a pink hairband.

Have you ever watched a black and white film? One or two, yeah.

Did you use to read Dr. Seuss books as a kid? I read one or two of them but they weren’t really a big thing for me.

What's the longest you've had to wait in line for something? A couple of hours for a theme park ride.

What's the sickest you've ever been? I’ve honestly never been really physically unwell, but I’ve had a couple of awful mental health episodes that came close to breakdowns.

If you had to be named after an inanimate object, what would you choose? Rose, maybe.

What is one food you would not like to give up? Potatoes.

Would you ever donate a kidney to a stranger if applicable? I don’t know - maybe?

How many scars do you have? Far too many to count.

Do you have any unusual things wrong with your body? (I have different length arms and hands for example) The only unusual thing I have is hammer toes - so my second toes are longer than my big toes and the tops are bend over lol.

What did you last have to eat? Sausage casserole with mash and sweetcorn.

When was the last time you visited a carnival? Uhh, years ago - they’re not really my thing.

Do you own a pair of those socks with toes? No. My mum bought me some as a teenager and I found them SO uncomfortable.

What age did you stop trick or treating? that is if you celebrate Halloween at all. I’ve never been trick or treating in my life. My parents never approved of that kind of thing haha.

What's the best flavor of popsicle? Raspberry.

Are you caught up on laundry? Yeah, I have a load in at the moment and that’s it for a couple days. Does your car tend to get super messy like mine? Yeah, but I use it for work as a dog walker so it’s next to impossible to keep it clean. I try and vacuum it every couple of weeks though.

What search engine do you use? Google.

Have you ever had a flat tire? Yeah, two punctures and once I hit a pothole and destroyed my whole wheel.

Do you know what ginseng looks like? No.

When is the next time you have to go grocery shopping? I have a food shop arriving tomorrow afternoon - I have such a busy week and I really can’t be arsed to go out shopping on top of that, hahah.

#survey #surveys #random survey #questions #survey blog #survey questions #survey tumblr

[othernecessarythings]

RAWRING 20s ASKS

I made some asks! Have fun!

1. Are you more emo, scene or punk?

um i think emo but only in music taste, i dress quite casual and stuff like that

2. Favourite band?

right now paramore!!

3. Any New Year's resolutions?

ye several, for example seeing at least 10 artists live, some different drugs and have over 800 songs on my playlist,, i like to keep my resolutions as actually possible goals, so that’s that

4. Favourite music video?

ooh maybe hard times? call me basic but i love it.. or like the short video of forest by tøp, where he walks on a street, ye that ones special too

5. Favourite song?

nooo don’t make me choose i love so many?? but like turn it off, graveyard whistling, ouch, avalanche, sudden desire, let’s go (khalid), ribs and like teen idle be kinda hitting rn ngl

6. Panic! At The Disco or Fall Out Boy?

um old panic, i don’t listen to fall out boy as much as i used to

7. Favourite album?

fight me but vessel and the black parade hasn’t got any bad song, and they will always have a very special place in my heart,, but right now? like nothing but thieves’ self titled, after laughter, amo and melodrama

8. Do you own a pair of fingerless gloves or skeleton gloves (or the combination)?

no but i wish i did

9. Do you own any band merch? If so, from what bands?

some, from tøp, paramore and bmth, but i only use my purple paramore hoodie

10. Got a jacket with pins?

i had one but then i took of my pins so not anymore i guess

11. Have you got dyed hair? What colour?

ye i dyed it black a few months ago, so it’s black/brown-ish rn

12. Any hair dying or haircut plans for 2020?

absolutely i’m going to cut it really soon, and i’ll probably dye it quite soon as well

13. Crush on any band member?

uh hayley williams i’m free on wednesdays please h it me up on a wednesday what are you doing next wednesday i’m free on wednesday hayley please

14. Killjoy name?

oo i haven’t thought of one yet

15. Are you into The Used?

no

16. Do you want any tattoos? Of what?

i’ve got one small, but i’d like a few more, like a matching with my sister and stuff but i don’t know any other specifically, just that i want it

17. Can you play any instruments? Which?

mm i’m actually quite good at piano, been playing a few years now

18. Favourite My Chemical Romance song?

oof there’s so many slapping songs, but like one from each album would be honey this mirror isn’t big enough, helena, teenagers/disenchanted, sing/planetary go,, and i am aware that’s basic but like there’s a reason why just those songs have become popular? they’re so damn good (and don’t at me with sing hate, it is a masterpiece and do not deserve the slanter i see on the tl)

19. Do you think Twenty One Pilots are emo?

as a former tøp stan myself can i say quite firmly that they’re definitely emo, but we need to re-evaluate what emo actually means, bc like in terms of the 00’s emo music? no, they’re not emo. they’re not like the emo trinity (lol), BUT they’re the perfect description of a modern emo band? so, no tøp isn’t emo in the old fashioned way, but yes they’re emo in a newer context,, and their stans are definitely emo i mean like come on

20. Are you into Taking Back Sunday?

nah

21. Do you wear any make up?

yeah but just casual, i’m always so amazed by people who wear lots of cool makeup every day, i could never

22. Do you have black painted nails?

lol ye always

23. Have you got any band posters? Of what bands?

mm i’ve got one with paramore that i like, and one with blackbear which is only because i likes the color schemes of it, i don’t listen to him otherwise

24. Do you want any piercings?

not right now

25. What's your opinion on All Time Low? Sleeping With Sirens? Pierce The Veil?

they’re cool i guess but i’ve never looked into them any further

26. Do you think it's just a phase or that you'll be emo/punk\scene forever?

oh the music will always live on with me, but how i think and express myself around the subject “being alternative/emo/pop-rock/whatever” will probably change as i grow into another phase of my life,, and like i’m okay with the thought of living my life in phases, and i’ll probably not be too ashamed of my current self a few years from now

27. Favourite magical/mythical creature?

i don’t really know any :(

28. Are you into Black Veil Brides?

nope

29. Do you like any newer emo/scene/punk bands? Which?

no not really i’m a quite boring music person in the sense of that i only listen to like the same five bands for a whole year,, so all the bands i’m listening to currently are releasing new music, but were created a while ago

30. What's your favourite music genre besides emo/punk\scene?

probably indie rock

31. Are you into Mindless Self Indulgence?

nein

32. Favourite Fall Out Boy song?

uh like i’m a slut for folie so like 27 or the shipped golden standard, but dance dance has always been a personal favorite

33. Are you mostly into the so-called "emo trinity" or "emo quartet" or do you listen to a lot of other bands too?

sigh i listened to both the trinity and the quartet a lot in 2018, i was a big fan of this whole trinity/quarter thing, but now do i just occasionally listen to some of them, but they’re definitely the roots of my emo path in this life

34. What's your opinion on Waterparks? Palaye Royale? I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME?

ooh idkhow are both emo/alt/pop-rock and quite new!! i forgot them earlier in this post! ye i love idkhow and their music, but i don’t really listen to waterparks or palaye royale

35. Are you into Bring Me The Horizon?

sure as hell am baby, love them

36. Favourite solo project by a emo/scene\punk band member?

right now is hayley williams solo project petals for armor a huge favorite of mine

37. Are any of your friends IRL emo/scene\punk?

um like kinda yes? or some of them have got the style but not the music, and some have got the music but not the style, so i guess it all adds up to a yes

38. Are you into drawing? If so, show some of your art!

ah i really wish i was creative but unfortunately am i not

39. Favourite colours and colour schemes?

red+black or pastel colors, i shift a lot based on mood, but my go to color schemes are dark blue and black bc i’m always comfortable in them

40. What are some of your favourite lyrics?

damn such a good question, i’ll make a separate post for it and continuesly update it with new lyrics!!

41. The Black Parade or Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge?

sorry but i’m a tbp fan, and you can’t convince me otherwise,, like i love revenge a lot but the black parade just hits different y’know?

42. What's your opinion on Paramore? Green Day? Blink-182?

well my biggest obsession right now is paramore so in short; i absolutely am in love with hayley, taylor and zac, the whole concept of paramore and of course their music+other content, even though they’ve gone through rough (or should i say hard) times

and i’ve listened some to green day, they’re really great and i like them, but there’s too much to get into and i’m not ready to be that much of a huge green day stan yet (will probably never be either) but i can absolutely casually enjoy their music and jam with their songs, without having to get into it any deeper

and for blink-182, i feel like they’re a bit too far away from my preferred genre right now, i will maybe listen to them in the future, probably not, but you never know anything for sure

so that’s all,, i love answering questions like this even though no one will ever read it and i’m cringe i know alright but it makes me feel happy so i’ll keep doing it

#just for my own sake #julias mind

[echodragon214]

Tagged!

Alright! So I️ was tagged by @theradicalfishdoctor! Thanks friend :3

Rules: Answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you would like to get to know better.

-> I’m not sure I️ know enough people who haven’t already been tagged :/

1. Nicknames: Well I️ have the whole shortening of my name thing so, Ari and Echo (but that’s a shortening of my username). But I️ also Cosplay so my Friends will call me the names of the characters I️ portray or nicknames of said characters. Two of my friends also like to call me Arana as a joke 83

2.Gender: Honestly? Not entirely sure.. but I’m most likely a Human. (Probably non-binary or gender fluid)

3.Star Sign: Libra ♎️

4.Height: 5′4

5.Time: Heh…. 2:22 am

6.Birthday: September

7+8.Fav Bands: I️ like all types of music and a lot of the time I️ only like one song a band makes, I️ enjoy the soudtracks if a lot of Animes, video games, and webcomics. And I️ obsess over musicals. But I️ do have a few bands that I️ am in the fandoms of or just like most of their songs. Such as

Imagine dragons, My chemical romance, Panic! At the disco, ABBA, Fall out boy, Twenty one pilots —> lots of “emo” stuff lol

9.Song stuck in my head: Vittoria mio core (I️ had an audition recently ;-;)

10.Last movie I watched: The Fox and the Hound, I️ had the urge to rewatch old Disney movies ƪ(。-。)ʃ

11. Last Show I watched: Supernatural ( I️ really need to catch up)

12. When did I create my blog?: Around a year and a half ago I️ think?

13. What do I post: A lot of Fandom stuff, some LGBTQ pride stuff, some random stuff, artsy stuff or things that inspire me. And last but not least, the rare orginal post~ which is usually a thing I️ made (sewing, cosplay, drawing/painting)

14. Last thing I googled: Schrödinger’s cat Illustration

15.Do I have any other blogs: Yes, @theinsperationaltacoman, a joke account I️ made with one of my friends. I️ do plan on making a orginal posts only blog though, where I️ will post my art and creations (cosplay, drawings, painting, etc) as well as a comic that I have been slowly but surely creating.

16. Do I get asks: I️ would love to, I am welcome to random Drawing requests as well :)

17. Why I chose my URL: Echo and Dragon were the names of two kittens I️ raised. Echo was a Female Siamese mix that I️ fostered from a family friend after her cat had kittens and Dragon was a Male orange tabby who I️ fostered after my neighbor’s cat, Turtle had kittens. The two were best friends (Echo was a little bit older then Dragon which made their relationship like a younger brother and older sister) The two went on to good homes, but I️ miss them to bits. The 214 is from an RPG game I️ used to play a lot when I️ was 9-13 ish. It was a randomly assigned number to be on the end of the username I️ created and now I️ use it at the end of all my usernames.

18. Following: I️ follow a lot of people lol

19. Followers: 18 humans 0-0

20. Hobbies: Drawing/Painting, Reading, Fandoms, Cosplay, Singing, and Tap Dance

21.Average hours of sleep: it’s sporadic.. 6-5 hrs?

22. Lucky number(s): 7, when I️ was born it was 7 am, I️ weighed 7 lbs 7 oz and I️ was born in room 7. My first and last name have 7 letters. I️ was also born in the seventh month technically (September)

23. Instruments: Kazoo. But seriously, I️ only sing, I️ can’t play any instruments.

24. What am I wearing: A red sweater and jeans.

25. Sexuality: Panromantic, Demisexual. (but just saying I’m Pansexual saves time lol)

26. Dream job: An English teacher.

27. Dream Trip: I’d like to visit Denmark or Italy

28. Fav Food: Fettichini Alfredo

29. Nationality: American

30. Fav Song: It depends on the day. I️ go through obsession phases.

Im tagging: (sorry in advance if you’ve already been tagged)

@friedeyelidscollector @aphcirclestealsursoulathogwarts

[90sgrungelouis]

Hey dudes I was tagged by @louandhazstrong !!! thanks bub <3

Rules: 20 followers you want to get to know better!!!

Name: Nina

Nicknames: hmmm not really a big nickname person but sometimes my friends call me nin, neen, or nin bean lol

Star Sign: taurus as fuk

Height: like 5′3″ i think??

Sexual Orientation: im thinkin like demi-bi maybe????? who tf knows honestly

Hogwarts House: hufflepuff!!! maybe huffleclaw a little bit

Favorite Color: maroon, mint green, or like any pastels really (ooohh i really like that holographic silver color)

Favorite Animal: dogs!!

Time Right Now: 10:17 pm

Cat or Dog Person: see above (duh) (also im hecka allergic to cats so, sorry cats)

Favorite Fictional Character: bellamy from the 100 ohhh man

Favorite Singer/Band: one direction (obv), the 1975, beach house, the emo trinity (shh i dont think i ever left that phase), ed sheeran, twenty one pilots, glass animals, bon iver, paper kites, tame impala, alt j,

Dream Job: man idek i have so many ideas, i wanna own my own farm, maybe work in the parks and rec department, or work on environmental policy in the govt, or in the national parks service

When Was This Blog Created: like this past september maybe??? its quite new

Current Number of Followers: im a baby account i think like around a hundred

What Made You Decide to Make a Tumblr: I had a regular account before this one for a couple years of just everything but then i started to get more into the 1d fandom and started following more and more 1d blogs until almost my whole dash was full of 1d and i wanted to get deeper into the community cuz yall seemed so cool so i just thought yep i should probably make a blog for it (i hardly ever go on the other one anymore….woops)

Why Did You Pick Your URL: louis eyes man

dang 20 people? ahhh im always afraid ill leave someone out or tag someone who doesnt wanna be tagged lol okokokok ill try

@princesslouis @louisasstattooo @fluffyau @dxggerlou @longwaydown-larry @sincerelarrie @0xyzen @champaynezaddy @wild-about-harry @peterpanaus @peachypetalhazz @cliffordnlouis @bisexvalziam @beelarrie @tiniestlouie @littlelouislegend @harryandlouisarehappilystrong  @fallenangel82

and anyone else who wants to do it! also if you dont want its whatever too <3 peace out kids

#tag games

[ncbodyhome]

@syd-parrot thank you so much for tagging me love! name: amanda nickname: mandy (what i go by), dawn (tbh i wish it's my middle name lol but no one really calls me that even though i wish they did)
gender: female star sign: taurus height: 5'9 sexual orientation: ace/asexual hogwarts house: hufflepuff i think favourite colour: like a sunset-y orange favourite animal: fox time right now: lol 12:01 am because i can't sleep because i'm sick af cat or dog person: cat person definitely lol favourite fictional character: oh geez this is so hard um probably charlie and patrick from perks of being a wallflower favorite singer/band: pink floyd (rick and syd are my babes) dream job: graphic designer when was this blog made: summer of 2012 i think? follower count: 376 (why do you all follow me?) what made you decide to make a tumblr?: it was during my strong nerd phase and i heard that the fandom was strong here lol why did you pick your url: because nobody home is such a fucking good song that makes me emo before the lyrics actually start and because it's about syd and idk just it's such a pure and broken song it's honestly my favourite floyd song (along with see-saw and one of my turns (i'm weird i know)) lol i don't really have twenty people to tag but eyyy @rogerh2os you do it ;)