#mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

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have we ever considered that nightowl and onionthief have the makings of two Bitter Exes

doing nightowl's route and seeing the way onion acted towards both us and him felt so...telling. like it's not even them being in a full romantic relationship, any kind would've sufficed, but everyone can see an unmistakeable tension

let me paint you a picture: two grad students who like the same web novel. so different, yet one always balances out the other

emotion and logic, the sun and the moon—two people are at incredible parallels to each other that they fail to realize that they're just the sides of the same coin

onion cares in his own way, calculated and cold yet with warmth all the same. and nightowl sees that. he argues, but he sees that. until the words are too harsh, too critical, too much like his mother and her endless ways to tell him he's not enough

on the other end, nightowl is the life of the party, seriousness can be so easily pushed back in his light. and onion basks in it. he gets burnt, but he basks in it. until the sleepless nights happen and the alcohol hits, too chaotic, too vulnerable, just too much

and they break apart. who cares about what they could've been if they had only learned that they shared the same affinity for numbers? what does it matter that they both know what it's like to fear the impending doom of expectations? they're just onion and owl. too different. too much for the other to love

then here comes mc with their patience, intelligence, humor, and kindness. and just like that, old wounds open as onionthief and nightowl see exactly what they wanted and needed from the other that they never got

but mc chooses nightowl. in all his failure and broken glory, and in turn, he chooses to be better for the both of them

while onion is left to think about all the what-if's. what if he were kinder? what if he were less arrogant and cared more about him instead of being right?

left to wonder why now, why not then when it mattered just as much, not when it was him who was on nightowl's side

why he just wasn't good enough.

#mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty #nightowl #blooming panic #bloomic #nightowl blooming panic #blooming panic nightowl #onionthief #nightowl x onionthief #onionthief blooming panic #nightthief #onionowl #literally brainrotting over them because it can't have just been me who saw all that tension #THEY'RE SO !?!?!!?!?! like just kiss alr idk #it's like they know so much of each other but also know so little #THE COLLECTIVE 'oh's WHEN THEY BOTH REALIZED THEY LIKED MATH #they're so bad for each other because both of them are in such DEEP COPIUM ALL THE TIME #but damn if they put aside their differences i think they really do love and care for each other in their own ways #mara phelion: when the head canons

[mara-phelion]

when they got married during the last replenishment and then got married during the last replenishment

#exu spoilers #cr spoilers #loquaerryn #loquatious seelie #laerynn coramar seelie #exu calamity spoilers #exu calamity #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

[mara-phelion]

Part of the SDV Fandom!!

Yes absolutely I see the transgender in this man

THANK YOU i swear he sees himself in jas too, especially considering that his old clothes might've been handed down to her!!

plus these quotes:

wanting to be physically bigger and having trouble understanding how someone could love for just being him

not wanting to have kids until there's stability and assurance in his life

AND THIS LINE ABOUT STAYING IN A SHELL

i gave him one long and hard look and had no choice but to project my transgender beam onto him like a mad scientist

#stardew valley #shane stardew valley #shane sdv #mara phelion: i answer brave people #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

[mara-phelion]

non-binary colors

#cr spoilers #critrole spoilers #critical role spoilers #laura bailey #taliesin jaffe #liam o'brien #ashley johnson #critical role #critical role campaign 3 #c3e27 #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

[mara-phelion]

the paladin of redemption and first knight of avalir, blinded by his own confidence that all is worth the benefit of compassion and trust, became servant to the one he sought and failed to save

the direct descendant of the one responsible for bringing avalir on par with the sky, one of the greatest and most prominent minds of avalir, realized knowledge was nothing if it died with her

the great dragon of avalir, named after a creature known to only care for its hoard of wealth, ordered for a selfless act to be done to save the people of the city

the wizard blinded with hubris, a visionary for her legacy and wanted to be perceived with glory for her greatest work of granting avalir a ticket to unlimited greatness, became the one to give the world a fighting chance at the expense of being perceived at all

the broadcaster born with a malleable face, one who built his image around an exaggerated version of himself, was the person who told the raw truth for the benefit of the masses

the senior sightwarden of the eyes of avalir, a man who built his career by watching the city with such focus that he forgot to see the family of his own, became the lone survivor of the ring of brass in order keep a promise to his wife and children

all of their greatest actions to protect avalir may seem contradictory to who they were known to be not just by their city but by us, and yet:

zerxus ilerez; the paladin of redemption and first knight of avalir chose to stay alive because he believed that even he, the man who was minutes away from becoming something terrible, could be redeemed

patia por'co; the direct descendant of the one responsible for bringing avalir on par with the sky chose to send her knowledge to someone who she knew had potential to handle and preserve it even past her own death

nydas okiro; the great dragon of avalir chose to save those children because he always believed in the importance of a dream, and who else could do so even in the midst of a war other than those youthful minds

laerynn coromar-seelie; the wizard blinded with hubris chose to use her life's work for something that held the same weight of importance of what she had always wanted to become, knowing that her efforts would not just be for vain for it is no longer just for avalir but exandria itself

loquatious seelie; the broadcaster born with a malleable face chose to tell the truth on his last day, not without the theatrics of a man who had the ability to change the hearts of those who listened to him in the same way he had the ability to change his appearance at will

cerrit agrupnin; the senior sightwarden of the eyes of avalir chose to be with his family in the end only after he used the skill and instinct he honed over the years, protecting the world he knew by specializing in taking down mages who pushed past the limits they were granted

their intentions may have changed, but these people did not lose who they truly were. none of their actions were contradictory for they were all capable of such acts

the people that we saw at the end of this story were still the same people we met at the beginning of it all

#exu spoilers #exu calamity spoilers #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #exu calamity #exandria unlimited calamity spoilers #exandria unlimited calamity #zerxus ilerez #patia por'co #laerynn coramar seelie #loquatious seelie #nydas okiro #cerrit agrupnin #the ring of brass #avalir #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

[mara-phelion]

i know people see ashfearne/callowmoore having sexual tension and their dynamic being described as something similar to friends with benefits (and if you do associate this ship with nsfw that is your business and you are so valid for that) but imo there's just something about ashfearne having non-sexual intimacy

other than their little thievery game: there's ashton doing acts of service for fearne (the face-changing bust), gift-giving (the glasses and them buying that bracelet for her to steal), wanting her attention (fearne joking that she wasn't paying attention to his fight with ratanish and them being oddly hurt), and his obvious endearment and curiosity towards her ("you remind me why i like you")

and fearne being in awe of ashton ("i think you're sort of beautiful"), his endearment and curiosity being mirrored by her own towards him (fearne watching ashton sleep), entertaining and basking in their thievery game as well, and offering to give him things if they just asked

it's just so oddly sweet to see them dance around each other like that and how the tension between them is just so soft and beautiful

#ashfearne #callowmoore #fearne calloway #cr fearne #ashton greymoore #cr ashton #rockwild #critical role campaign 3 #cr spoilers #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty #as a very early ashfearne truther i get you people associating them with yk #but i'm just such a believer that they're whipped for each other in a playground crush way

[mara-phelion]

as orym's eyes caught sight of the blade and comprehended its impact, his first instinct was not to dodge or run or yell

it was to reach for the sending stone that connects him to dorian, hoping that this time he'll get to say good bye before losing someone he loves again

#orym of the air ashari #c3e33 #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #c3e33 spoilers #cr c3e33 #dorian storm #will of the air ashari #dorym #like this post if you are a dorym truther who was victimized by c3e33 #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

[mara-phelion]

the more i think about it the more i realize that zerxus' situation is like so much more fucked up if we add elias' appearance in the situation

luis confirmed some part of zerxus did fall for asmodeus, but also mixed with convoluted paternal love, which sounds bad but it also makes sense when we take into consideration that while asmodeus pretty much looked like an uncanny valley version of his dead husband, that is also probably what zerxus envisions elias to look like especially when he grows up

there's that love and longing he felt for evandrin that he felt when died, and then there's also another form of that love and longing he felt for elias that he felt when they became closed off to each other

adding to that: he missed so much of elias and the last time he saw him, he was just a little kid who needed guidance and protection. then when he saw asmodeus, he exuded this energy of a need for someone to help him (dare i say a child-like helplessness and innocence)

for zerxus to be subconsciously battling between seeing evandrin and then seeing the son he feared he wouldn't see growing up before his eyes

the idea of him being torn between this demonic image of his husband AND his son, both being the most beautiful people he's ever known, and to see that face and those features on the literal devil himself must have been a wild ride for him

#critical role #exandria unlimited calamity #exu calamity #exu calamity spoilers #zerxus ilerez #cr zerxus #elias ilerez #evandrin ilerez #cr asmodeus #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty #exu wrap up #exu calamity wrap up

[mara-phelion]

excuse me but how is no one else talking about the ashton/fearne moments we got this episode

fearne delicately tracing her fingers on ashton's glass brain as he slept, fogging it up a little bit with her breath, and then drawing a smiley face on it ???

then fearne struggling to get that exandrian face filter bust with her -2 strength modifier only for ashton come in, grabbing that object of her desires with one arm, and her sounding just the slightest bit flustered before asking "do you need some help?" ????

ashton being the first to say "alright, let's get you outta there" to fearne when she was in the portable hole as if they were offering to pull her up ?????

i adore them, thank you

#ashfearne #callowmoore #rockwild #critical role spoilers #critrole spoilers #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

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imodna canonically having small arguments about cup arrangements in shelves is the most domestic thing ever

they are wives your honor

#imodna #imogen temult #cr imogen #laudna #cr laudna #laudnagen #critical role campaign 3 #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

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saw a bunch of comments under a post (that says "laerryn broke the world for quay") implying laerryn didn't really do anything for quay and all her actions were for her work

and let me tell you guys, the absolute confusion i felt because did we not watch the same show???

sure laerryn was no way near a great person from an ethical standpoint but i would like to remind us all that she didn't hate the tree just because of her failed experiments; she hated that tree because it took her best friend who just so happened to agree to be her test subject

the moment she saw loquatious' look at her with fear she was ready to stop casting blight and she only truly casted it because she saw her friends (patia being her best friend and quay literally being her husband) get HURT by said tree

like why are people so sure of themselves that laerryn was an apathetic bitch who can't form any emotional bond? also she dedicated her life to her work and to realize that the cause of her experiments' failures was just there?? like i would be mad too

laerryn was not perfect but she wasn't someone who only cared about her work. she cared about evandrin, she cared about patia, she cared about zerxus, she cared about nydas, she cared for cerrit, and she especially cared for quay

so yes, she did in fact break the world for him and it's more than appropriate to say that even when she literally helped fixed it anyway

#critical role #exu calamity #laerryn coromar seelie #i'm convinced all of you who think that she's some emotionless person for choosing her work are actually misogynistic #i'm sorry but cerrit and zerxus did it too like they chose their work over their literal children and i don't see y'all hating them #laerryn is a complex and layered character she isn't a one dimensional person idk how some of you can't accept that #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty #also i'm not saying her actions are justified because she's really not a morally upright person #but she's also not the devil incarnate so stop acting like she's worse than the literal lord of the hells #loquatious seelie #the ring of brass

[mara-phelion]

i know it wasn't really intended but i want it to be known that it means a lot to see a character, a pc at that, inspired by the philippine eagle (which is a critically endangered species) to be the one to get out alive and find his way back to his family

#as a filipino cr fan i was ecstatic to realize cerrit was inspired by the philippine eagle #cr spoilers #exu calamity #exu spoilers #exandria unlimited calamity spoilers #exu calamity spoilers #cerrit agrupnin #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

[mara-phelion]

zerxus casting atonement on asmodeus was the dnd equivalent of "but i can fix him"

#critical role spoilers #cr spoilers #exu spoilers #exandria unlimited calamity spoilers #my man really told a literal betrayer god to find him #zerxus ilerez #cr zerxus #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

[mara-phelion]

there i was, breaking slowly at the fact that all those fictional scenarios we made up where dorian has to learn about orym dying while he's away would've been a reality if imogen and laudna didn't save him

only to find myself hit by an unstoppable force and go from tiny cracks on glass to completely shattered pieces because of this:

I AM NOT OKAY

#critical role spoilers #dorym #dorian storm #cr dorian #orym of the air ashari #cr orym #also don't look at my discord profile picture that is definitely not dorian's face plastered on megamind's body #YELLING #i am screaming i am sobbing i am punching the floor as i am crumpled on the ground #MY WHOLE CONSCIOUSNESS WAS SO FOCUSED THE ''YOU LIED'' SCENE #THAT IT IS NOW ONLY HITTING ME THAT ORYM COULD'VE FACED PERMADEATH #and dorian wouldn't even know :') #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty

[mara-phelion]

i know i'm not as active in the cr fandom (especially on here) but being in that community helped me develop my writing skills SO MUCH

i wrote a total of 7 ao3 fics for it (one is a wip too) and the words amounted to 19.2k like what do you mean i wrote that much

not to mention the fact that i used to post silly little stuff on here that were worth PARAGRAPHS??

idk i just wanted to tell everyone (esp people who followed me for cr and stayed despite the blog reformat post) how much cr changed my life and truly allowed me to improve more than anything ever has

#mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty #critical role #bonus: i met so many cool people?? if it weren't for this piece of media i would not have met one of my best friends what the fuck

[mara-phelion]

thinking about fearne gravitating towards ashton and all of his broken glory

their green skin that reminds her of the color of leaves, but slightly tough and course like a malleable stone

the way they speak their mind and act on their own terms,, catering to himself but in the way that is genuine too; an embodiment of the fundamental chaos that's ever so familiar

ashton was soft once, but got tougher through change and their hardness made them both so difficult to break but also so difficult to fix

fearne peered through this gaping hole on his head, delicately dragged her fingers on the surface of their glass-covered brain, and didn't see heaven nor hell

to her, ashton's body built from stone and scrap is not the result nor the gateway to the afterlife

he felt familiar, like something she can't help but find beautiful. they feel like the feywild: chaotic, self-indulgent, and complicated yet entrancing, fun, and true

ashton feels like home; a place that one can never truly understand, but one she missed and knew

#i love them your honor #ashfearne #callowmoore #rockwild #fearne calloway #ashton greymoore #critical role spoilers #critical role campaign 3 #mara phelion: some thoughts head not that empty