#our little cal is dumb at love

[shayyprasad]

weighing scale

tw: eating disorder (purging, not eating), bodyshaming, ed shaming

btw, if it's requested, i can turn drabbles into full oneshots!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you guys are beautiful the way you are, and nothing anybody ever says or does will ever change that. remember that gaining weight is totally normal, and you can always lose weight, too, but please, do it in a healthy way. if you ever need anyone to talk to, and this isn't just for eds, i'm here, and you can reach out. if not, there are people who care about you and love you.

you're amazing you beautiful mfs

(also i'm sorry if this might not be correct for you, everyone has different experiences with eds)

(also, also, i did 1st person ... and this is just the way i thought when i was going thru this so i kinda made it relate w/ me??)

100.

98.

96.

she watched as the numbers went down, satisfied despite the fact that it was only one pound less yesterday.

90.

88.

even if it meant that she'd always be cold, or that her hair would fall out. it was a small price to pay to be beautiful. to be skinny. to be like all the other girls that peter liked.

y/n kept telling herself that. and it was enough to keep her going.

{four weeks prior}

(first person)

they had little packets for us to take home, like forms. something along the lines of "annual health check-up." the form was just... well, it wasn't a form, really, but more of an opt-out. the paper said they'd just check weight, height, and some other things, like make sure you didn't have scoliosis.

honestly?

i was just happy to be missing a good chunk of math.

everyone got called down to the gym by period, and mine was 5th period, right before lunch.

our class was waiting for them to call us down, so mr. callen just let us do whatever until then. i glanced over to see liz, kayla, and chloe in the corner of the classroom, giggling and pointing towards some of the boys, and eventually, mr. callen.

he was one of the youngest members on faculty, fresh out of college. and i'll admit, he's not bad looking. in fact, he's hotter than most of the guys. and if it wasn't peter that had my heart, maybe i'd think about someone else.

not that the whole peter thing was going great anyways, he seemed interested in liz. so maybe that was my hint to move on. but i don't know. i've just liked him forever, it'd feel wrong to stop now.

i'm just really loyal, i guess.

or maybe this is some weird first love/crush thing, because no matter what, i keep finding myself coming back to him.

it took me second to realize that i'd been staring at the same spot for a while now, so i probably looked funny. i re-adjusted my position and looked at the clock, noting there there was just a few minutes until we'd have to go down.

i looked by at the girls, then at the teacher. did they not realize that he had an engagement ring on? or where they just dense?

because honestly, i'm having a hard time figuring out which one it is.

liz pushed chloe over to the desk, giggling like a manic.

chloe bit her lip, trying to hold in laughter. "hiiii, cal. you know, like, cupid's day is coming?"

me, personally, i didn't really believe in the whole dumb blonde thing, but chloe was changing my aspect on this.

cupid's day was on valentine's day, and you could pay a dollar to have a rose delivered to someone. normally, the freshmen girls did most of the planning. freshmen girls were annoying. they were always together, and i didn't remember a time i'd seen one alone.

i didn't get any on my first year here. last year i got three. but it didn't really count, because mj got me one and betty did. i was hoping that i'd figure out who the third person was, but three weeks into that investigation, i kinda gave up. if they hadn't revealed themselves to me at that point, i'd figured that they probably wouldn't.

maybe junior year will go better.

if you were popular popular, you got at least seven, so it was kind of embarrasing to only get one. and it was probably even more embarrasing to only have, like, one friend. which was betty. but she hadn't hung around me that often since she started dating ned.

mj was an observer, and i knew that much. it was probably the only reason she got me a rose, because she felt bad. but then again, anyone could see how pathetic it was.

peter and i used to be pretty close, but then he met ned, so the attention he gave me got halved.

i would have tried to be friends with ned, because i know he's really nice, but i stressed out too much about it for some reason and gave up. social anxiety, perhaps? it didn't matter, it was too late to do anything about it now.

after that, peter started hanging around liz and some of the other popular kids, and entirely forgot about me.

did forget about ned, though. maybe beacuse i was a girl, and so peter got called "gay" a lot for that. i didn't have much of a chance compared to liz, so i just admired him from afar. it's not that we didn't talk, because we did sometimes, but... actually, i don't know what.

if peter wanted to, he would have.

and it's fairly obvious, but i'm delusional and chose to ignore that.

the intercom snapped me out of whatever zoning out i'd gone back to, "block d, block d. i-is this on? oh, it is? i- yes, block d down to the gym."

everyone got up and pushed their way out the door, i didn't have that type of energy, so i just waited for everyone to get their butts outta the way and then went myself. i followed them down to the hall, staying behind a little. when i finally got over there, i ended up last, right behind chloe, kayla, then liz.

for the most part, it only took a minute or two for each person, so the line didn't take that long.

well, i suppose that's subjective.

it took 15 minutes, but whatever.

when liz was inside, she didn't take care to close the door all the way, leaving it a couple inches open. that's on her.

that's on her for being irresponsible, so it's not really my fault if i accidently hear. i leaned in a little, suddenly very interested in the wall, with all it's cracks... and... paint, and...

"and step on the scale, please... that is," she paused, and you could hear scribbling of a pen.

"121.3 pounds. perfectly healthy. that's actually the average weight for girls your age," another pause, "make sure to give this form to your parents. have a nice day."

liz said something in return and i stepped back, done admiring the wall. "next!" the lady called in.

i stepped inside the room, and it smelt strongly of hand-sanitizer. "okay, honey, step up against the wall... height is... alrightly. now the scale, please."

i did as she asked, keeping my eyes trained on the numbers.

149.7 pounds. basically 150. that was more than liz's, right?

"149, okay, you're good to go-"

"is that around average weight?" i asked, and it was impulsive, i didn't even think.

"well, it's somewhere around that. you're perfectly healthy."

the intercom came on again, signaling my time was over, and the lady thought the same thing, because she ushered me out.

as i walked back to the classroom, i couldn't help but think;

149? no, 150? around average? so basically, i was above average. 30 pounds heavier than liz? no wonder peter likes liz better.

god, that's disgusting. i'm disgusting.

i trudged back to class, unable to stop thinking about it. and suddenly, an idea popped into my mind; why not lose weight? if i lost a little, maybe peter would care about me again.

that's genius. god, i'm a genius.

yeah. i lose a little weight.

when i got back, he'd already started the lesson, not that i cared. i spent the rest of that class figuring out the kinks, like how many calories i'm allowed to eat per day.

i settled on 800.

it seemed like a decent number if i wanted to actually make an impact with weight loss.

stupid kale smoothies weren't gonna get me anywhere, nor idiotic influencer workout routines.

before i knew it, the bell rung and kids were hustling through the hallways. i was kind of on autopilot as i walked to lunch, not really watching where i was going. i'd by mistake shouldered some people, and they gave me dirty looks. i shot them right back.

i couldn't help but silently, in my mind, judge everyone's body that i saw. and not just their body, but other physical features, too. it was automatic, i didn't even mean to. but i couldn't help it.

she's really fat. the gym exists for a reason.

how is she so skinny? i know she's anorexic.

and it just went on and on.

i didn't know what was going on. why this mattered to me all of a sudden.

it was like i didn't notice these things before, i wasn't looking for them, but now that i knew they were there, i couldn't help it.

i couldn't help a lot of things.

when i walked into the lunchroom, i saw peter sitting by himself, writing on some piece of paper, and if i knew him, he wasn't doing the homework due tomorrow.

he was doing yesterday's.

it didn't seem like i'd be bothering him if i went to go talk to him, so that's what i did. i figured since we hadn't talked in while, it would be great to now.

and it'd be a great distraction, too.

i sat down across from him, "hi, peter."

he looked up slowly, a smile rising on his face. "uh, hey, y/n/n," peter paused, "what, um, what did you need?"

"huh? oh, i didn't need anything. just thought i'd come by and annoy the hell out of you."

"just like old times," peter snorted.

"math homework?"

"yep. i have math-"

"-next period," i realized my mistake after i made it. "um, 'cause i see you when i'm walking to class."

in repsonse, he nodded like he was considering it.

i didn't notice i was hungry until my stomach growled, but something inside of me made the thought of getting food and eating it repulsive. i hesitated before grabbing on of peter's fries and popping it in my mouth. he didn't say anything, or really even care, and i didn't know if i liked that or not.

"okay. you have chem next, yeah?"

i blushed at the fact he knew.

"uh, yep," i snagged some more fries, feeling myself loosen up.

and then i realized, that's what this was; i was just in need of some time with actual people who weren't my parents.

i liked this. i liked talking to peter. it was easy. this was easy.

we laughed about some other things, like flash's new donkey haircut.

and i stole more fries. ned, betty, and mj (who normally sat two seats away) came over. the topic of cupid's day came up.

"how many do you think you'll get?" betty asked.

i looked up, "roses?"

"uh-huh."

ned spoke up, "you won't need to worry, bet, i'll get you a whole bouquet." he looked proud of himself.

"i'm not worried," she giggled, like the lovesick fool she was. it was gross. and yes i admit, it was slightly because i was jealous, but whatever. betty didn't have to act so idiotic and desperate.

betty's skinny, too.

"what about you, y/n?" peter said, locking eyes with me.

"i dunno. i never really get any."

something changed in peter's expression, but as soon as it was there, it was gone.

i took another fry. they were really good, for some reason.

"fattie," peter laughed, pulling his lunch tray back, "and then you complain about not getting roses!"

that caused a round of laughs in the small group, but my heart dropped to my feet.

i was right. i was overweight. even peter noticed.

freaking peter noticed.

god, i was ugly and fat, and even peter saw that.

of course he liked liz. he'd be crazy not to. she was curvy and skinny and petite and pretty and skinny.

she was skinny.

i didn't have her hourglass figure.

never did i ever want out of my own skin more.

"y/n?" pete frowned. "i-i'm sorry, it was a joke, i didn't-"

"no, no, not that. i, uh, i... forgot i was supposed to meet with a teacher. sorry. i have to go."

i didn't go to any teachers.

i did go to the bathroom.

and i hid in the handicapped stall. i didn't cry, or sob, or weep or whatever it was stupid girls did in hallmark movies or stuff.

i stood in front of the mirror and picked out everything i hated, making a mental list in my head.

i didn't finish that list, not even after 30 minutes when the bell rung.

-

the rest of the day flew by rather quickly, it seemed. i felt like i was trapped in a warm haze, but not the fuzzy, happy warmth. i didn't like the way i was thinking. it's like i wanted my brain to turn off, these intruding, ugly thoughts were taking up too much room.

i felt icky.

when i got home, i didn't have my normal after-school snack like i usually did. i went straight upstairs and did homework.

i finished two essays (one that wasn't due until two weeks, and one that was due two days from now), my math homework and studied for my math test, started my science project, and did my french flashcards (and studied them a bit).

i must have been locked in my room for hours, because by the time i got up, it was dark outside.

i wasn't a studious person, and the only reason i did any of this was to forget for a little while. to snap out of it. and for a while, it worked.

"y/n, honey!" my mom screamed from downstairs, and as i glanced at the clock, i realized it was time to have dinner.

but i wasn't hungry.

well, i was.

let me rephrase that; i didn't want to eat.

however, i didn't want my mother yelling at me, so i went down anyways. not that i was planning to eat.

"mom?"

"oh, hey. i already set the table, you seemed like you were working hard and i didn't wanna bother you. dad's working late. go sit down-"

"not hungry."

she frowned. "well, you have to eat something."

"but i'm not hungry," i said, hating how sharply it came out.

my mom gave me warning look. "look, i've had a long day, so don't start with me."

"mommmm," i whined.

"sit."

so i did. i felt bad about bothering her.

i ate. small, tentative bites, forcing it all down. we didn't talk.

silently, i put my dish in the sink, before heading upstairs. the food sat at the bottom of my stomach, like a pile of heavy rocks. i wanted them out.

so i turned on the shower and locked the bathroom door, kneeling in front of the toilet. i pressed my fingers to the back of my throat and kept them there for a second. at first, all i got was bile.

but then i threw up.

-

peter and i started talking more again. i think he got in a fight with liz.

i asked him if they were dating, and he said no.

i think he started hanging out with me again because i got skinny. i know for a fact that i'm skinnier than liz. i weigh less then her now.

the numbers told me that.

but i didn't listen.

i didn't stop, and how could i? when i'd gotten this far?

-

we got in a fight. not the yelling kind, though. well, kind of. i yelled a bit.

i thought he was complimenting me. he said i looked skinny, so i thanked him.

"no... i-" he paused, trying to get his thoughts together, "you look skinny, yes, but not in a good way."

"what? what do you mean? like, there's only a good way," i laughed, slightly nervous.

peter ingnored that. "have you been eating enough, angel?" his voice was soft, but there was worry in it. why was he worried? this is the best i've ever been.

"do you ask liz that, too?"

"i- what?"

"liz is skinny. you don't ask her that."

"that- that is different. y-you haven't been eating, have you? is-"

"god, parker! stop! it's none of your business!" maybe if i hadn't been so flustered, i'd have come up with a better comeback.

-

i was hunched over the toilet, but nothing was coming out. everything hurt.

my head. my stomach.

my throat was scratchy and raw.

i didn't hear the knocking on the door.

i don't really remember peter coming in. i thought i locked it. what was he doing at my house? i couldn't remember.

i wanted to sleep.

i think i was crying. i don't know. i only vaguely remember the hot tears.

i slightly remember him pulling me away from the toilet and into his arms. there were lots of holes in my memory for that day.

he stayed with me, though. one thing i'm sure about is that peter never left my side. i can recall bright lights. tubes. i was laying on something. white walls. white sheets.

what was engraved into my head was peter whispering "i love you" over and over again. in the bathroom. in the car. was it a car? as they hooked me up to cables.

all that mattered, though, was that i was skinny now. just the thought made me feel light and airy.

to think that all it took was a little motivation and a weighing scale.

#reader discretion advised #tw ed #tom holland x reader #spiderman #tom holland #peter parker #peter parker x you

[nark-week]

NARK WEEK 2024 ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!!

To celebrate a whole year of surviving Discord Modhood, we decided to host Nark Week! Just a week full of Nark, right here on tumblr!

Just a few quick rules before we get going here:

1: This is fun! It's gotta be fun! This isn't a Shipping Contest, this is a celebration of something we love! Starting a dumb shipping war is NOT on the agenda. (Neither is General Mean-ness. We're cool over here in Nark Nation)

2: Use the '#Nark Week 2024' so we can find what you made!!!! We're gonna do our best to spread the love!!!!

3: NSFW is great!!! But you gotta tag it properly for our friends who are at Work. [Make sure to tag NSFW, for serious]

4: Conversely, Non-NSFW is also great!!! Which sounds very silly to say, but never feel forced to be ✨️salacious✨️ if that's not your thing

5: The prompts are a guideline!! We want art!!! And fics!!!! And cosplay!!!!! We want to be glutted on Nark for years to come!!!! If you have Nark, we want it 👍👍👍

6: Thank @Nolassolace for the awesome announcement art!!! (U don't have to do this one but I had to give credit where credit is due bc LOOOOOK at it)

7: (Mod Cal here) For the writers, we have an Ao3 Collection to which you can add your written works. Write and post your fic as you normally would and add the finished product by looking up 'NarkWeek2024' in the 'Post to Collections / Challenges' bit.

8: If you've read this far, you might be the kind of person who would like our Discord Community. We're a quiet 18+ little commuinty that came from Nark, but branched out to the podcast as a whole. We hope to return to our Nark Roots with this event!

#Nark #Nark nation #Dndads #Dungeons and daddies #Nark Week 2024 #Nick x Lark #I've consideered tagging Nick's Various Names but. This will do i think #Come play dolls with us all the cool kids are doing it /j

[always-andromeda]

Drunk on Halloween || Calvin Weir-Fields x Fem!Reader

Calvin Weir Fields x Fem!Reader

Word Count || 3,195

Summary || Calvin is aching for one night of peace; a bottle of wine, a cheesy horror movie, and the love of his life. However, some trick-or-treaters have different plans in mind.

Author’s Note || can you guys tell that I'm a Calvin apologist with this one? can you guys tell that even though I think he can be toxic as fuck, I'd sell my left nipple for a dime to have him just for a night? am I writing this note at four in the morning and that's why it's so unhinged? mind your own business, perhaps.

Warnings || smut (minors, do not interact or I will dip you into an ooky spooky vat of acid <3), thigh riding, slight use of pet names (Calvin calls the reader a good girl like twice lol), Calvin is an uptight little freak, reader is just in for a good time (good for her), nothing else I can think of!!

"Work all night on a drink of rum, daylight come and me wan' go home..."

Calvin pulls away from your neck, nearly breathless, "Are you really going to do that?"

You continue singing quietly but dramatically from underneath him, "Stack banana 'til the mornin' come, daylight come and me wan' go home..."

"Are you kidding me?" He groans.

"Come Mister Tally Man, tally me banana, daylight come and me wan' go home..."

Hair flopping forward, Calvin's head tips downward, mere millimeters from being buried in your chest, "Wow. You're really committing to this."

You giggle at his expense, "It's not my fault you decided to start something right before the dinner scene."

With nearly every night having been a movie night, you'd waited for something like this. However, you knew that tonight was likely that night as soon as Calvin pulled out a bottle of red wine, insisting that he bring some modicum of culture to the table. A few glasses later and all he'd manifested was a heavy haze that came to smother both of your lazily lounging figures.

Calvin says in disbelief, "I've never seen this before, how was I supposed to know what this scene would turn you into?"

"You should know because you know me, Cal." you slur.

He sounds even more tired than he really is when he replies, "I doubt that more and more with each passing day." Then he shakes his head as if he's actually upset. Your lighthearted demeanor dulls.

Voice softening, your hand rests on his cheek, "Hey, why does it matter? We're having fun, right?"

Calvin watches your eyes go wide, staring at him wearily. It reminds him a little of how his mother would look at him when he was upset. Like he was a child who'd thrown a fit. The next thing he was expecting out of your mouth was something akin to, "There, there, Calvin. It's okay." He can't tell if that annoys or comforts him.

"I guess..." he sighs.

You ask, "What's that supposed to mean?"

The cogs in Calvin's head turn as he tries to figure out exactly what had ruffled him so much. You never let him get away with passive aggression. He's not even sure why he does it in the first place; there's something that tells him there's no chance that anyone would even care why he was frustrated. So why should he bother to even try verbalizing it?

Your dumb runs over his cheekbone, "Cal, what's wrong?"

He begins shakily, "You know...I like when things go to plan..."

Your tone is laced with a little giggle, "So you were just planning to fuck me ahead of time? Is that how all of our sexual encounters go?"

"Don't call it that."

Your smile turns into a full grin as you stare incredulously, "What? Fucking? You mean what we've been doing for months?"

Immediately clamming up, Calvin replies, "It's just...it's not romantic when you say it like that."

You laugh, "Ah, because having sex while drunk on your couch is peak romance." Calvin watches your finger slide down the bumped bridge of his nose before you tap the tip.

Something in the teasing action makes him lighten. Maybe it's the fact that he swears he saw you wink afterwards. Or maybe it was the way the light from the television and the shadows of the darkness twisting and tricking his imagination. Or maybe he's just sick of worrying; maybe he's finally hit the threshold between his nervousness and his want. 

He mumbles, "It could be."

You scoff, "You're so silly."

"Says the one who wanted to put me in fishnets and a corset." He reminds you of the conversation that took place during one of your previous Halloween movie nights. The film: Rocky Horror Picture Show. You had laughed while comparing him to the hero of the film, teasing him with breathy repetitions of the line, "Oh, Brad." He'd scowled and rolled his eyes, ignoring the way his stomach fluttered every time he heard it. It reminded him far too much of other sounds he'd heard you say.

"I stand by the fact that you were made to be Brad."  You add daringly, "And I think you would've looked super hot in them. I probably would've gotten undressed half an hour ago if you looked like that." Then you looked at him; eyelids at half mast and finger running down one of his arms bracing the weight of his body over you. His skin shivers at the languid movements. He wishes he wasn't wearing a damned sweater so he could feel the soft drag of your nails.

He hears the resigned lyric of Brad Majors ring in his skull, Damn it, Janet. I love you.

Without a second thought he dives back in, delivering a swift kiss that quickly turns more fervent as he tastes more of the dark red wine from earlier. Or maybe the taste is on his own taste buds. He's not entirely sure and he's far too lost in the moment to really differentiate the flavors. All he knows is that the view of you beneath him is alluring and convincing him that his timing is auspicious. Your fingers tangle in his hair, bringing him impossibly closer to you.

He moans right as the song playing ends and breathes, "Can I touch you?"

Though you hear his desperate question just fine, you decide to taunt him a little bit more. "Huh?"

Calvin demonstrates an unusual level of assertion when he fishes around the top the couch and grabs the remote, mashing a button to lower the volume of the television until the movie was almost completely silenced.

You can now hear his khaki covered knee slide up the upholstery of the couch, slow as it eases comfortably between your own legs and presses just slightly against you. It's just enough pressure on your clit that you begin to ache for more. More movement. More warmth. More tension. He's close enough that you can practically see yourself coming down from your high already. Then Calvin repeats himself, rewording the question to reflect his insistence.

"I want to touch you."

You don't dare laugh now. You're too busy teetering on the edge of something big, you can taste it in the back of your throat. 

"Please," you croak.

No matter how indifferent he can come off at times, Calvin can't be cruel to you. Instead, he's immensely satisfied with himself as he kisses you again, allowing his tongue to slip between your own lips. He takes as much as he wants and gives just a little more, allowing you some purchase from the heady tease of his knee grinding a little further against your pussy.

Wrenching away from the kiss, you regress into a pleading, mewling tangle of arousal, "Calvin, please-- please just let me...let me--"

His low voice bites you in an almost fatal way. "Let you what? Let you fuck yourself on my leg?"

You like the way the curse leaves his lips. Somehow, a man like Calvin can make the most vulgar words sound poetic even as he practically spits them at you. It makes more heat pool between your legs. It makes you fucking whimper for him. This is a rare form for both of you.

With you regurgitating the same cry of, "Please, Calvin, please..." He lets out his own chuckle.

"I'll let you move soon." He promises, "I just want to touch you first."

Calvin stays true to his word, anchoring a hand on your hip, rubbing circles with his thumb on your hip bone. Your sweater had begun to ride up your torso, exposing your soft stomach and the underside of your chest. Calvin lips curl at the sight of the pumpkin patterned sweater than matched his own. The idea of getting matching holiday sweaters had sounded terribly romantic; something he's sure he'd read in some romance novel as a teenager and simply filed it away in his subconscious. Now he finds his head filling with less than romantic thoughts as his fingers graze the hem of the brown, knitted garment and he realizes that underneath the silly sweater, you're not wearing a bra.

His hand wanders, caressing your side until it disappears entirely underneath the sweater. Cold fingers brush against your ribs and your breath hitches. With the television turned down, Calvin hears it and attempts to amend it by bringing his mouth to your jaw, peppering imprecise, open mouthed kisses along it until he reaches your ear. 

He whispers that you're pretty. So pretty as you gasp when his hand finally reaches one of your rounded breasts. He wastes no time focusing on the nipple, swiping his thumb over it carefully. And there it is again: the want that is just dying to keep building. It leaves your clit feeling like it's been set on fire. Another string of miserable pleas leave your lips as you turn your head to the side.

You stare at the television screen now, watching as the titular Beetlejuice torments Lydia's father. Despite the volume being turned all the way down, you know the line that comes out of his mouth. But, even then, you don't have it in you to utter, "We've come for your daughter, Chuck." because fuck, you need to come first.

Calvin takes a hold of your chin with his thumb and forefinger, gently turning your head back to stare into his eyes, blown out and glassy just from feeling your skin. Your breath is raggedly trailing through your burning lungs. 

Pitying you just enough, Calvin grants you the permission you've been waiting for. "You can move now." He says simply, as if he isn't just as worked up as you are. As if he isn't just waiting for you to ruin his pants; as if he isn't already preparing himself for the gloating he'll get to do when he does laundry tomorrow.

You respond eagerly but not to get too ahead of yourself, not wanting to unravel the knot inside you too quickly. You rock against his knee with smooth, unwaveringly slow motions. Calvin notices your restraint and lets praise drip from his tongue like raw honey, "Good girl...good girl."

The pet name sounds marginally awkward coming from him, but you're too far gone to second guess it. You let it spur you on even more when your thigh brushes against his erection. Based on how solid it is, you can't even imagine how much control it's taking him to hold back from letting himself get off. And a part of you is proud that just the feeling of your supple skin under his palms and your breathy cries were enough to get him that good. So you offer him a little relief by pulling him down on you, giving your thigh more of a chance to graze him fully.

Beautifully, Calvin groans shakily at the friction. Though it doesn't compare to being inside of you in the slightest, the mere movements are just enough to begin brewing his own climax.

Before too long, you're a tangled mess, hopelessly humping against each other on the couch, the movie long forgotten as you both aim to reach your releases. It only serves to provide mood lighting that flashes against your faces, illuminating how Calvin's expression contorts gracefully with the pleasure. He squeezes your breast with every restricted stroke against your thigh, making you whimper. It's a slurry of heaving chests, uneven breaths, and messily placed kisses and you both inch closer and closer to the end.

You're ascending the final hill, seconds away from the peak. Every time your clothed clit brushes against his knee, you feel your climax slowly and steadily clicking continually, just about to slot right into place when--

"Happy Halloween, Calvin Weird-Fields!" you manage to hear the yell faintly through your lust filled haze. You try to ignore it and continue rutting against him. But Calvin's hand leaves the confines of your sweater, hastily pulling it down over your torso before scrambling off of you. Your climax careens backwards down the hill, leaving you high and dry and ready to tear your hair out.

"Wait--" you barely have a chance to get an extra word in when he sits up.

He raises a finger quickly, shushing you.

Then you hear it again, a similar voice screaming from outside, "Yeah, happy fucking Halloween, Weird-Fields!"

"You've got to be kidding me. Not again." Calvin groans to himself before clambers away to his front door, barely having enough of a grip on himself to smooth his hair back. With the movie and you and the swiftly fading arousal fading, the tension returns to his shoulders, promptly weighing him down.

By the time he gets out the door, the teenagers have gotten back on their bicycles. They pull Halloween masks back over their faces and have already begun to ride back down the hill. At the risk of sounding too much like his late father, Calvin holds back the urge to yell obscenities back at them. He can't even think of the words to accurately express his anger anyways. 

He just turns back, staring at the stark white stucco of his two story home, now adorned with garlands of toilet paper. Right then, you emerge from the entrance, following him out to the little concrete sidewalk at the front of his home and looking at the damage. This time, the one thing keeping you from chuckling at the sight is the outrage clearly radiating from your boyfriend.

Calvin reaches up, only just tall enough to reach a strand that hangs down. Though he tugs on it gently, it rips off quickly, leaving him with two and a half pitiful squares of toilet paper in his grasp. 

His voice wobbles with frustration, "Are you-- you've gotta be kidding me." He jumps a little this time, reaching for the same sheet as it flutters in the wind, pulling off yet another few squares that he crumples in his trembling fist.

You watch him begin to breathe heavily, his lip quivering as he only works himself up more and more.

You reach out to lay a hand on his shoulder, "Hey, honey, stop..." but that doesn't quite catch his attention. You repeat firmly, "Calvin, stop."

He whips around and shoots you a venomous reply, "What the fuck am I supposed to do about this?"

"I don't know. Can't you pay someone to come out and clean it up?" A guy as wealthy and with as many connections as he did had to know someone who would be willing to take care of the mess.

"How the fuck am I going to get someone out here tonight?" he continues to rant, "Why the fuck are those kids even allowed to be out after dark? 

You raise your voice, "Calvin!"

"What?" he snaps.

"You don't need to worry about this right now. Why don't we just go back inside and--"

"What's the point?" he laughs dejectedly, "The night's already ruined anyways."

"It isn't ruined." you insist.

"Yes, it is. They fucked it up and I fucked it up even more and fuck it's all just fucking fucked." His tone only gets more irritated as he rambles on, dropping the crumpled toilet paper squares to the concrete and running his quivering hand through his hair once more.

This hadn't been the first time those teenagers had done something like this. It started with them leaving empty beer bottles on his sidewalk after drunkenly laughing on his porch all night. Calvin had heard the antics of course, but had been too hesitant to do anything. He just hoped they'd go away. So he simply recycled the bottle and thought that was the last of it. But they were spoiled rich kids that lived in the hills and were determined to make the pretentious author's life a living hell.

The last incident, weeks before this, had almost been the straw that broke the camel's back. They'd managed to get their hands on a copy of one of his books and torn the pages out, crumpling them up and littering the bushes in front of the entrance with them. Placed directly on his doormat was the bent and destroyed cover. They'd taken permanent markers to the duster jacket and written insults all over it. Most of them were childish scribblings. The one that stuck up to him most was the simple addition of an extra "D" in his name.

Thus came the creation of the most clever quip these teenagers had against him: Calvin Weird-Fields.

It was silly, he knew it and his cheeks grew red every time he thought about it. But it only ever reminded him of growing up being the prodigal genius. Most people thought he was brilliant. That presented a certain set of issues, all laced with a paradoxical sense of narcissism and self loathing. But the people that insisted he'd peaked during his teenage years? That opened up a brand new avenue of anxieties, ones that made him feel sick to his stomach every time he thought of them.

He really was nothing special. Just a kid who got lucky once. And he'd never amount else aside from that. Those bratty teenagers would probably do more than he ever had managed to do in his few decades of life.

Feeling your hands set on his shoulders once more, you bring him back into the moment. "Calvin. It's late. We can worry about this tomorrow. We're both kind of drunk and I'm sure we're both really tired. So why don't we go back inside and try to get some sleep?"

Eyes glazed over, he stares back at you blankly through his tortoiseshell glasses.

You continue, bringing your hands down to his and hold them tightly in yours, hoping he can feel your sincerity in the touch. "Honey," Right as you start, you remember his words from earlier. "Just because things didn't go exactly to plan, it doesn't mean everything is fucked. We're going to be just fine. We'll figure it out in the morning."

"We?"

Your head tilts bittersweetly, affected entirely by his tenderness and all too aware that he's still too used to going at things alone. You can't imagine what it's like being stuck in his head sometimes; caught between a self aggrandizing front and an inner voice that is probably far more critical of himself than even the harshest reviewer.

"Yes. We." you answer finally. "Now can we go inside? I'm getting really fucking cold. Maybe you can warm me up." With the chunky sweater you're wearing, it's obviously a complete lie. But you don't think Calvin notices or cares. 

The anger starts to melt away and he squeezes your hands in his before bringing them to his lips and giving them a chaste kiss. You see his gloomy green eyes are misty with the beginnings of a few tears that he quickly wipes away with the sleeve of his own sweater.

"That sounds nice." he concludes quietly, letting you lead him back inside his apartment.

#danonation #paul dano #danocel #ruby sparks #calvin weir fields #calvin weir fields x reader #calvin weir fields x you #calvin weir fields x y/n #˚ʚ meda writes ɞ˚

[thegeminisage]

star trek update time. last night we did the maquis parts 1 & 2 because i simply did not want to deal w tng.

the maquis (ds9)

standout moment for me in this entire two-parter was sisko's speech. ESPECIALLY good that in a fit of frustration he delivers it to kira and kira alone, whomst he maybe did shout a little bit at earlier because tensions were so high, and then he has the grace to look embarrassed and say he's glad someone understands. like it was the EXACT same thing she was yelling about earlier and he didn't take her as seriously as he might have, like, not in a delegitimizing way, but in a way that says he hasn't experienced that kind of helpless frustration for himself. and then he got to experience just the tiniest slice of what kira has and he Got It. you know?

ALSO SOOO TRUE THE PROBLEM IS EARTH!!!! it's easy to be a saint when you live in utopia. quark had a similar speech earlier in this series about how humans are friendly and wonderful when they have full bellies and working holosuites and they turn vicious without them. ds9 knows whats up

it's tempting to blame all this on picard but while picard did NOT act with honor the true villain is the nameless faceless politician that decided this would be a good boundary to draw and absolutely no one would have any problems with it. it's weird to me, in the age of constantly calling our government officials to make sure they don't cancel healthcare or tell them to stop bombing people, that no one would try to get to the bottom of this and figure out which person they're supposed to call to tell them it was a dumb idea and demand they change it. like, the border is drawn like this, it's an immutable fact of life and it's not gonna change. it feels so weird

anyway, kira was GREAT in this episode. she has so much to be angry about and so much she wants to give to make sure nobody has to suffer what she did. like she's so passionate about it and it comes from a place of love or at least compassion and it's such a nice detail. that she's so angry all the time because of love. man. she's so great

i recognized one of the maquis guys from tng i think! well, i'm bad with faces but it was at least one of the same costumes. i'm so sorry dude rip

one of the maquis guys has a passing resemblance to barclay. really jumpscared me

should have known hudson was a villain bc he asked inappropriate questions about dax. however, it was funny that sisko laughed off the idea of them sleeping together when they fucked twins or whatever

i liked the jennifer mention :( im sad sisko and cal couldn't make up...he tried until the very end

what i love about the ethical debate is that theyre both right. the maquis are right because the new border IS shit. it IS unfair and they DID get abandoned to the tender mercies of the cardassians, who are sure as shit not gonna let them stay there unbothered (that tng episode painting this as a happy ending...AS IF). like, they have every right to defend themselves since no one else is gonna do it

but sisko is ALSO RIGHT because escalating the conflict into full-blown warfare is gonna get even MORE people killed and make things even MORE miserable for the colonies affected, who have already been through more than enough. the colonists can make life harder for the cardassians, just like the bajorans did, but they can't actually win a war, they can only drive themselves into the ground doing it. at BEST they will make some nameless faceless border-drawer think twice the next time they draw a border

like, that's why i'm so shocked nobody suggested calling the politicians to making them redraw it. it's the only third option?!?!

quark and the vulcan was so funny. shoot your shot, buddy, even though you lost the love of your life two episodes ago. i was a little insulted he managed to out-logic her, but also reluctantly impressed. quark is always entertaining, i just wish he had a LITTLE more depth.

gul dukat...i admit i never gave him a second thought before this episode. now i am reaffirmed in my belief that all cardassians are gay. he exhibits such an energy. i really liked the part where he put the fear of god into the weapons runner even though sisko was ready to sit on him to keep him from touching the torpedo controls. such a fun dynamic for him to be going "murder? :D?" and for sisko to be playing straight man and yanking him down by the scruff of his neck every 5 minutes. fun fun fun. i do think he should have kept his mouth shut when he and kira were in the same room though. like i think he should have just chosen to not speak unless prompted.

i like how twice odo's ability to maintain security at the station was called into question and both times sisko was like oh absolutely not. and even still, the tension was nearly enough to cause in-fighting in what has become a pretty friendly group. it's both surprising and unsurprising how quickly they drew the battle lines, but even the non-federation people, kira and odo, snapped at each other. LITERALLY CALL THE POLITICIANS. EARTH IS THE PROBLEM

my one real nitpick is that i don't think it should be possible to resist a mind meld with "discipline." like, it's more interesting if cardassians have a special immunity, or if this particular vulcan is bad at it. i just don't buy that gul dukat happens to be that cool, it's too convenient. why bring up the mind meld at all in that case

otherwise 10/10 i had a fantastic time

TONIGHT: devil's deal means we have double tng, "firstborn" and "bloodlines." something about alexander and daimon bok from season 1??? looks rank. wish us luck.

#personal #star trek blogging #ds9 lb

[vee-crytraps]

Good Luck, Babe! | Ch 1-2 | Ice Cream for Breakfast

{Trigger Warning/Themes Masterlist} This is split into a billion parts because it's long as hell! Read on Ao3 to avoid the headache!

You might not have the freaky little memory that your family of detectives boasted, but you would be out of your mind if you ever let yourself forget that Bruce Wayne owed you one. Exactly one year ago to the day, Bruce, Dick, Jason, Tim and Damian had abandoned you at Rollerworld, a frown fixed onto your face as you had watched them all peel off in the name of Bat-Family business. The threat hadn’t even ended up being serious. Serious for Gotham, anyway. At the time, you had grateful to have corralled them together- at a roller rink of all places, for the twenty or so minutes that you had them- but you remembered finding it tough to remain in high spirits for the rest of the night. You hadn’t even seen them until the next morning, when Bruce had promised you a day of anything you wanted to make up for the embarrassment of having to carry home the remnants of a too-big-cake on your lap, enduring the stares and snickers of the other people on the train.

You reveled in the way Bruce’s frown deepened as he watched you sitting triumphantly at the head of the table. He fixes you with one of his patented bat-glares before finally giving in. “Fine,” he sighs, defeated. “Ice cream for breakfast.” “From the look on your face, you’d think you’d sentenced him to the electric chair,” Dick laughed, plopping down in his usual seat. He spun a spoon between his fingers like a drummer about to let loose. “C’mon, Bruce. Live a little!” “It won’t be so bad, I was kind enough to make sure to get everyone’s favorites. Even Damian’s god awful mint chocolate chip stuff,” “Mint chocolate chip is the most delicious flavor in the world,” Damian warns, and beside him Tim prays you two won’t get into a whole thing about it. “It’s a perfectly fine treat,” “It’s an abomination is what it is.” Tim laughs. You toss him a set of plastic Mardi-gras beads, which he snatches mid air with his impressive reflexes. “Did you give me these because I agreed with you?” He questioned aloud. “I see you’re being extra insufferable about today, birthday girl.” Jason hums, pulling up his own chair. You elect to ignore him, gesturing for Bruce to join you at your right side. “I even got some low cal, non-dairy vanilla for you. Matcha for Dick, Coffee for Tim, and for Jason-“ “Rocky fuckin’ Road.” Jason finishes with glee, cracking open the pint in front of him. “I’m sold. All hail the birthday princess.” He catches his beads and dons them with pride. “I expect everyone to eat at least one bowl. You are supposed to be making it up to me for ditching my party last year.” You reminded. The whole table erupts into groans. “Oh for the love of- how is it our fault that Scarecrow decided to have his grand re-debut like twenty minutes into your party?” Dick whines, digging into a spoon of matcha flavor. “To be fair, we would have back pretty quickly if you and Jason hadn’t gotten caught up one-upping each other,” Tim shrugged. “I don’t know why you’re all complaining, I’m the real victim here,” You joke, digging into your own ice cream. “Besides, Ace and Titus don’t seem to mind,” With your spoon, you gesture over to the pair of dogs who lap at the pet friendly ice cream seated into their bowls. Both beasts sport tiny paper party hats that had been carefully strapped to their heads. “Ace and Titus are animals, sweetheart.” Bruce cracks a small smile, pushing his ice cream around in his own. “I do not understand why you are making such a huge deal of this,” Damian interjects. “We’ve all had celebrations interrupted by villains." “It was my seventeenth birthday, Damian. The last one I would have before becoming a dumb, annoying and boring adult. No offense. Let me grieve for it, at least.” “It is wayyyy to early for this,” Jason groaned, leaning back in his chair. “And I was kind of looking forward to waffles.” The only people he’d rather be eating with less other than four superheros were probably four other superheros. You all eat together in relative peace, and as you really savor your first spoonful of birthday ice cream with all of the fixings, you can’t help but sigh with pleasure. “Oh my god,” you relax into your chair, savoring the melt of it on your tongue. “Now I know why you never let us keep this in the house. I could eat this for every meal.” “I can hear your teeth rotting from here,” Damian mutters under his breath. He can’t help but be confrontational, even if it is really good ice cream. He makes a face as Dick artfully squirts chocolate syrups into his matcha ice cream, topping it with crushed Oreos and a few gummy worms. “I have witnessed deaths more appealing,” Damian remarks, watching his eldest brother scoop the abomination into his mouth. “I’ve had deaths more appealing.” Jason snorts. “Babies! Whiny little babies, all of you.” You scold, pouting as you loaded your spoon once more.

Part 3

#v.fic #tim drake x reader #jason todd x reader #dick grayson x reader #damian wayne x reader

[hirokiyuu]

wow so when i wrote this i was like "hey this i'm only posting bc it's the first part to something much funnier" and then completely forgot to post the followup. so here have some dys>sol(>cal/tammy) bracelet scene pre-pre-pre-rship stuff. i love when kids are dumb and in love

it's ok (we'll find our way); 1k

When Sol crests the hill to where Dys is packing for his next trip out, the very first thing that Dys looks at are his wrists, because Dys is an idiot. Because apparently Sol is also an idiot, he is in fact wearing the databand, spinning it with his other hand as he stares down at it. “Hi, Dys.”

Thank fuck half the time he just nods hello at Solana anyways, because trying to unstick his jaw from where it’s glued shut sounds pretty impossible right now. Not that Sol even notices, really, still staring down at his dumb new bracelet. “Um. Can I… can I get another ten minutes where you don’t tell me you think something’s stupid?”

Thank fuck that him packing means he has an excuse to turn around. Against all odds his dumb voice doesn’t crack as he says, “Sure?”

“Someone likes me?” Sol blurts, instantly, and when he glances over, Sol is blushing. Stars. Dys kind of wants to die. “Like, I got this message on Vertumnalia, and apparently, um, this --” he holds up his wrist, like Dys hasn’t been staring at it since the moment he showed up “-- is from a, a secret admirer?”

Yeah, I fucking know. He bites it back. “Oh.”

“Someone likes me,” Sol repeats; he’s staring down at the dumb thing with stars in his eyes. “No one’s ever liked me before. Like, I mean, I thought, um. I thought Cal did, and I was…. I was totally wrong there, y’know?”

Because Cal is the stupidest person in the colony, yeah. Why anyone would ever pick Tammy with Sol as an option, Dys will never understand. “But…” says Sol, and the smile that had faltered on his face for a moment is back, small and sweet. “But I guess someone does.”

Okay. Maybe the whole thing wasn’t such a terrible idea after all, if it makes Sol smile like that. Or at least, that’s what Dys thinks for exactly two seconds, before suddenly Sol looks up at him and blurts, “Who do you think gave it to me?”

Nevermind, Dys wants to die again; he jerks back around, grabbing the nearest ration to shove into his pack so Sol won’t see him blush or whatever. Luckily Sol doesn’t actually seem to be expecting an answer, already barreling on ahead: “Like, I was thinking about it, and I really don’t know? Like, at first I thought maybe it was one of the Helio kids, but I don’t really know any of them that well, and whoever made this, um… I mean, it has a bunch of stuff I’m into, y’know? All the music and vids and stuff that I like?”

Next time Sol starts talking about Sanctuary Moon, Dys is turning on his holospeak and pretending he’s gone deaf. “So that kinda narrowed it down, I guess, to one of us? But like, obviously it’s not Cal--” because he’s an idiot, as previously established, and fuck but Dys hates the way Sol’s face drops a little just saying that “--and Nemmie’s super gone on that Vace guy already, so I knew it wasn’t her, and that just leaves --”

--oh fuck here it comes--

“--Marz?”

Dys stops. Puts his things down. Turns around. “...What?”

“I know!” Sol’s got his face buried in his hands, which is good, because Dys has absolutely no idea what kind of expression he’s making himself right now.  “I know, I don’t like it either, like….” He drags them down his face before looking up at Dys; for a moment seeing Dys’s face he wilts, but then rallies again. “I-I mean, it’s a nice gift! It’s a really, really nice gift, y’know? It made me… it made me really happy, okay?”

Stars. Of course it did. There’s a weird lump in Dys’s throat when he hears that, but Sol, still charging stupidly ahead, doesn’t even notice. “But even if I liked girls, I wouldn’t like Marz, she’s way too mean and bossy and I just….” Sol sighs again, slumping over, and despite his words he’s still playing with the bracelet. “I didn’t even think she noticed me that much.”

“She doesn’t.”

Sol blinks, looks back up. “What?”

Fuck. It’s too late to take the words back. Dys takes a single breath, wipes his palms against his legs, and then manages, “It wasn’t from Marz.”

“Oh,” says Sol. He’s got that same puzzled frown he always gets when they’re up on the walls and he’s struggling through his homework. “Wait, really? But how do you know… that….”

The silence is deafening, as the frown gives way to slowly widening eyes. Dys, for his part, turns around and starts shoving all his stuff into his bag as fast as he can, who gives a shit about organizing right now? “Dys,” says Sol, a little unsteadily, and even without looking Dys can picture the way his whole awful handsome face has gone slack in surprise. “Are you my --”

“So what if I am?” he interrupts immediately, because if Sol actually says the words he’s going to die. His face is on fire. “Don’t make a big deal about it.”

“Oh,” says Sol, still sounding totally bewildered. Dys should’ve chucked the stupid databand off the ridges when he’d finished making it; he starts buckling up the pack and ignores the fact that the top won’t go totally shut. When he glances back, just for a second, Sol’s gone red too, still staring at him, and in return Dys flushes even more and looks back away. “I-I won’t.”

“Good,” says Dys, reaching his limit. Before this stupid conversation can drag on any longer he grabs his pack and hustles away, not quite sprinting only because he can’t actually run with the stupid thing on. As he goes, though, he glances over his shoulder once last time.

Sol’s still standing right where Dys left him, head tilted back down to the bracelet, touching it gently the way he had been when he’d first walked up. On his face Dys can just barely make out that same small, shy smile as before. Dys nearly trips; Sol looks up; their eyes meet and for a moment that smile grows just a little before Dys whips his head back forward, his own dumb heart pounding so loud it’s all he can hear. 

#Earnest Teenage Cringe! Earnest Teenage Cringe! they are Young Dumb And In Love! #if yall remember previous shit ive written this is the same version of sol that asks dys to marry him later WWWWW #dreamy idiot....... head in the clouds......... no thoughts just physical skills + max bravery #love in his heart <3 muscle in his body <3 air in his head <3 #i love when men are gay and stupid #title again from 2023 for no reason other than i wanted it to match the first one LOL #'what if you stop theme titling all ur exocolonist' what if u let me live my life #this is for both the person who posted dishsoap recently nad made me a little feral over them again #adn for emimi who i love 'why' I Love Her Is Why #i was a teenage exocolonist #how do you writing #dishsoap kiss! dishsoap kiss! dishsoap kiss!

[mushiewrites]

hi hi what about red and ghost of you <3333 I wonder what could've inspired things like those ones <3333 hehehehe

- cal :))

from this milestone post / red / ghost of you

"I wonder what could've inspired things like those ones" you are so so soooo lucky I adore you 🙄

SO I wrote Red originally just for me and cal back in November - I never actually planned on posting it because at the time I was still iffy with feet tks and I also thought it was a little too intense (which is laughable now considering what I've posted since then). BUT I wound up posting it in december and I dont regret it at all, bc it allowed me to post even more intense things and get comfy with feet tks now :D

I wouldn't say it was self indulgent exactly, but I put things in there that I related to or had maybe even experienced, and also I was testing out writing intense things, because at that time I had only done it a handful of times. I also wanted to write a certain spot that maybe is flustering to a few people and this was a chance to do that and explore the reactions to that 🫠

Im almost positive cal and I brainrotted a bit about this? but I cant look through our messages around that time for reasons, hope this helps! :D

like I said in the tags on that fic - puppyduo stays together and suffers together <3

- - - - - - -

for Ghost of You....okay. look. it was based off of this concept of mine about dream being teased to the point he's giggling and blushing and doing lil kickies

I honestly just wanted to explore the idea of someone being flustered out of their mind and I wanted to write lee!dream bc even though he's shy, I know he leans into the feeling and loves it so so much. I wanted to write a lee I knew would enjoy it 100%, and that for me is always gonna be my dreamie 🥺

there's not a lot of other reasons I wrote it, I just wanted to write a solo thing, just focusing on the feeling and the flusteredness and the thoughts that come with it!

it is absolutely NOT anything I ever do and anyone who thinks otherwise is incorrect and wrong and dumb <3 thank you for coming to my ted talk <3

#awkwardtickleetoo #asks #u are an idiot and a dork and a gremlin but ur my idiot dork gremlin so its fine I guess <3 #anyway #thank u for sending in something baby #and thank u for always reading my stuff and thinking of titles and letting me rant all of my ideas to u #ur the best puppy a puppyduo could ask for <3 #mushies 300 milestone #cal said the way i worded that i cant look through our messages made us look like we got divorced #we did not #the messages around that time are just flustering <3

[forgottenwyrm]

❦

🤝 (architaciturn)

Send a ❦ if you'd consider shipping our muses.

bonus if you add a type of ship you’d like them to be or a thread idea for our muses.

Gale and Caledonia, best friends, but do hear me out; he should get kisses too. i could see it. that's her wet cat wizard bf she has to protect. they'd be sweet gale will have to visit the icewind dale though so his poor knees will ache. but she'll live where he wants (not like she can't move when he dies). probably the nicest of the dynamic of the potentials. the healthiest. least evil. but i mean. cal is still chaotic neutral. revenge is sweet. plus dragon cult is dumb and evil gale. please look the other way or support her. you were one of her favorites....

Astarion. She would love to pick on, but also friends who are okay with murder and very much out for revenge against their abusers/captors. elegant boy. feral girl. that is the vibes. astarion will suffer. but also she could take him to the icewind dale; if he remains spawn. cause the icewind dale is cursed by auril to be eternal winter and prevents the sun from rising every morning. so you know. trade-off. also they would both live a very long time. so one way or another; they would at least have each other for centuries. whether that is friendship. or some kind of relationship. or caleonia being a consistent pest for astarion :) universal constant. the white dragon in the vampire boy's unlife.

Roes and Cal YES. Dragon and Slayer. Yum. Corrupt Cal route; think Bhaal can get behind her wanting to eradicate the cult of the dragon? cause she thinks it's dumb. they are dumb. also revenge. she's doing it anyway, roes is invited to the murder. two scary dogs out on a walk, ignore the trail behind them. plenty of play fighting and rough housing. barks at this. sprinkle a little murderous intent into your amnesiacs.

@architaciturn

#[ ooc ] izzy babbles #architaciturn

[kyndaris]

L.A. Calling

From one red-head protagonist to another, I thought the brief lull during the holiday season (for games I was interested in anyways) would be the perfect opportunity to try out the Burning Shores DLC for Horizon: Forbidden West. After all, there was a reason why I kept the game despite finishing it after a hundred hour marathon of a month gaming last year. That reason, of course, was to ensure I knew the new story threads leading into the third game. But with the passing of Lance Reddick, it was also a chance to catch a glimpse of his last performance as Sylens - Aloy's reluctant ally.

So, from the highs of the Star Wars universe, I plunged back down to a post-apocalyptic Earth where robot dinosaur roam and a rogue A.I. is hurtling back to destroy what remains of humanity. Good stuff!

Following on from the ending of Forbidden West, Burning Shores sees Aloy heading down to the ruins of Los Angeles after being notified by Sylens that Walter Londra, a member of Far Zenith, had headed there following his arrival on Earth. Aloy agrees to investigate and heads down the coast on the back of a Sunwing.

As she approaches the the remains of Los Angeles, Aloy is shot down by a drone tower. With the help of Seyka, a member of the Quen, they take down the machines in the area before heading to Fleet's End: the settlement the Quen have made since floundering in Los Angeles after a typhoon.

It isn't long before Aloy agrees to help the Quen out and find their missing people. And it certainly wasn't very long before I was scrambling across the map of old Los Angeles to scrounge up collectibles and completing the scattered side quests and errands available on the map.

Could it have benefited with having a Tallneck to climb up? Yes, but given Aloy had flight on her side (granted soon after taking down the first drone tower), it wasn't very long before I managed to explore most of the map and engaged with a few select new machines like the Bilegut and the Stingspawn.

From a narrative perspective, Burning Shores didn't really add anything new to the overarching plot except another scavenger hunt across an open world for a weapon to take down Nemesis. Or, perhaps, the third game will truncate the search a little by focusing it once more in some area of the North Americas. Here's hoping, though, the Horizon series takes our allies across the seas and try something a little more different from the remnants of the ol' United States of America.

At the very least, though, Aloy walked away from the adventure with a new ally she was keen to work with. All throughout the DLC, Seyka stayed by Aloy's side and proved to be an effective fighter. Was it any wonder she proved to be Aloy's first actual love interest?

Both of them are capable warriors and hunters of machine. Both are practical problem-solvers, doing what needs to be done instead of fussing about if it'll offend someone's sensibilities. And both are driven.

I'm actually somewhat relieved Aloy didn't try to push Seyka away. Although, it did take her a while to finally admit the impending threat that was Nemesis heading back towards Earth, keen to destroy the Earth. Still, Seyka had her own secrets when it came to her sister and her fears Kina had willingly joined up with Walter Londra (a fairly forgettable antagonist) who was willing to irradiate the surrounding land in order to escape back into space and be surrounded by a loving and brainwashed cadre of followers.

Combat-wise, Burning Shores added in a few new different skills to tackle on enemies. In the end, though, I found myself still relying on tried and true abilities. Given it had also been a year since I last played Forbidden West, my skills were also quite a bit rusty. So, I'm not ashamed to admit I did dumb the difficulty down just to ensure I could enjoy the story rather than struggle in a high-end area because I'd forgotten Aloy couldn't parry attacks like Cal Kestis or that the way she normally tackled enemies was from afar with ranged attacks.

It was also a matter of relearning the status effects of the game, like drenched and frozen and shock and corrosion.

Targeting weak points also proved to be a trying affair after all the different games I'd played over the year. Especially given how the machines move and make it difficult to target the one spot that'll do MASSIVE damage.

Or maybe I just need to 'git gud' as the pro gamers like to say.

Overall, I enjoyed my time with Burning Shores. It was good to dive back into the Horizon universe and tackle on a map that wasn't as large as the base game. It also helped there weren't a ton of collectibles needed to be found and unearthed. So, my map wasn't entirely pockmarked with '?' to drive my curiosity and insatiable need to uncover every. Single. Point. Of. Interest.

Thank goodness for small mercies.

Now, if you'll excuse me, there are huge open-world games where I need to collect a thousand and one items calling my name.

#video games #aloy x sekya #burning shores #horizon: forbidden west #I'm not sure how I know the name of the song I used to title this post #lance reddick #sylens #the name of the title just came to me

[juanabaloo]

First Kill! Here's my live (ish) blog of E08 "First Betrayal." This is the last episode of this season. I'll post some more thoughts this weekend after I let this sit a bit.

Elinor has no remorse even after Juliette calls her a soulless murderer.

I thought Theo was possessed bc he calls Cal "Callie" (and Cal points out he's never done this before) but it's a red herring.

Cal and Apollo are dumb for not telling their parents they saw Theo dead.

J betrays E. Oliver sics SWAT on E. The trophy licenses she kept were a dumb idea. Also glad the show did include Sebastian asking for a warrant to the cops, which is a real thing they violated (not showing a warrant to enter and search the house.)

J has her "you know it was me" moment, watching E get hauled away by the cops. That little smile at the end.

Yeah E def seems screwed, Oliver as her lawyer is not going to help her.

Interesting that both families have councils. Boo to the councils.

OK, back to Theo. He is a vampire, Jack wants to kill him. Theo stops himself from eating Apollo. OMG Juliette offers her arm to Theo, and he drinks from her. This is clearly ALOT, even if vampirism wasn't so coded as sexual. And Cal witnesses this! Gahhhh

So apparently J accidently turned Theo when she was "trying to drain him so he could die with dignity." Whaaaaa? This makes no sense to me.

Talia fights Jack on killing Theo, and we get some nice scenes showing Talia telling Theo she loves him. So ofc she escapes with him (yay) to take him to a safer place (good) but that turns out to be Oliver and his witch girlfriend Carmen's house. Uhmmmm, not so sure that's a safer / good place. The show actually ends on that scene, with Oliver showing off some monsters he has created, or something.

But I don't wanna end on that. Earlier Margot and Sebastian are talking:

Margot: she will get over the hunter girl. young love never lasts.

Sebastian: ours did.

So the show is pointing out that even though Margot doubts it, there is an example of young love lasting.

The show in this episode did not have J and C for me. It felt like they were trying to set up plot points for a S2. (E in jail, Oliver plotting something, Theo now a vamp, the 2 sets of parents struggling with the future.) Booo to that.

So once Cal realizes that Juliette turned Theo (accidentally), she basically turns on Cal. She tells J "stay the hell away from me" and J responds "I love you." Eventually Cal goes to stake J, which J just stands and waits for, and then Cal decides not to. J gets in her car and drives away, crying as she drives. As SOON as J is in her car, Cal loses it, crying. And then Cal runs, but we don't know where she ends up.

sad ending, so here's 2 gifs from happier days in a prev ep.

#first kill #live blog #just watching my little shows #first kill spoilers

[strangeswift]

amber and lantern <3

Hi Chicken!!!! <3

amber - share an unpopular opinion that you may have.

First Kill (lez show on Netflix if you don't know) fucking sucked and no amount of wlw rep makes it not suck. Like I see the appeal in "so bad it's good" shows. This is not that. It's just so bad it's bad. And it's not the bad special effects and dumb plot that ruin it, it's the fact that the relationship between Juliette and Cal was so rushed and so poorly fucking developed. Like. They're horny for each other and then they decide not to kill each other and then all of a sudden they are in love and have this deep bond? With no development? I get that it's cuz Juliette bit her ig but it feels like lazy writing to me. It makes no sense and I did not like it. I honestly think this opinion isn’t unpopular people just don't SAY IT. But as a lesbian prob will get canceled for this. Just like First Kill.

lantern - how did you meet your best friend? What were your first impressions of each other?

I met her in high school marching band lol. Our first impressions of each other (we have discussed this) were both that we thought the other was super cool but were a little intimidated by each other lmao

Ask game.

#asks #ask game

[oh-katsuki]

cal if it's ok with you, wanna share headcanons about your selfship with tendou?

YESSSS I HAVE SO MANY!!!!

i think tendou has this way of just like... he's going to do something and it's assumed I'm coming with. going to get coffee?? "why aren't your shoes on?" watching a movie??? "sit in my lap." studying in the library??? "bring your book, i forgot mine." i don't think it's particularly clingy either, just kind of an acknowledgment that i am welcome if i want to come.

tendou and i call each other bro and dude. our relationship is as much a bromance as it is a romantic relationship. like are we in love? yes very much so. is that my bro? yeah, that's my little guy.

pet names are rare and get both of us flustered but me most of all. sometimes tendou will just be like "babe, look at this" when we're out in public or something n i will get so flustered and he'll just be like "hah, cute." i try to do the same thing but tendou always just gives me his little smile and then i embarrass myself. he blushes though.

tendou is like a cat that gets himself in trouble. like he will be plotting something for some untold reason to mess with our friends. n when i catch him doing it and ask him what he's doing he just gives me that stupid ass wry smile. i hate him so bad he is so annoying.

sometimes people tend to judge me as level-headed and nice while they assume tendou is cocky and a bit mean spirited, then i will do the most stupid dumb fuck shit with him and they'll be like "nevermind” bc they were so incredibly wrong abt both of us.

we tease each other for funsies. there is always play beef to duke out. remember that one time he scared me while turning the corner? well, i do. forgive but never forget. he needs to sleep with one eye open /j.

people sometimes can't tell if we're dating bc we act VERY not couply in public most of the time. then tendou will get the kurge (kiss urge) and plant one on my mouth and vice versa. or decide that he wants to be cheek to cheek while i show him something on my phone.

im so enamored with him.

#[ 🏩 – chatting ] #tendou x cal #i just... i have so many thoughts abt him #he's the self ship i surprisingly think i'd be most likely to work out with if i could get over the hump of being intimidated by him at fir #first #because i think once i knew him he would make me feel so COMFORTABLE sharing #and i think he'd appreciate being told things openly and honestly #plus i whole heartedly believe that i'd be good at picking up on what he's thinking and feeling #and that he'd appreciate that #AND he'd think im cute #like sorry not to be vain but he would think I'm ADORABLE #he would be insane over our almost nine inch height difference

[controlledvolatility]

Marsha: Oh… You know what? I think I’m gonna buy a Peloton. Yeah, I am gonna start dating.

Nate: You’re a drunk.

M: Mm, what? You don’t want a stepfather?

N: Mom, shut up.

M: No? Ooh, ooh! What about one who’s your age? That’d be fun.

N: Shut the fuck up. You’re acting like a fuckin’ teenager. Jesus fuckin’ Christ.

M: Wow! Why is it, why is it that you only have the bad qualities of your father, and none of the good qualities?

N: Okay.

N: Right, so Cal, Cal’s a fuckin’ saint now.

M: No. That’s, that’s, that’s not what I said.

N: That’s literally what you fuckin’ said.

M: No, it’s not. I just– He’s deeply flawed, and somehow… somehow, some way, we raised a child who’s even more deeply flawed. Do you ever wonder about that? Do you just like– What went wrong? Do you ever think about that? No, of course, you don’t because your fuckin’ dumb-ass dad didn’t believe in therapy, so… self-reflection’s off the table. It’s just– It’s just a mystery to me. ‘Cause you were such a sweet little baby. I remember you used to come to our bedroom at night, and you would, you would ask me if I wanted anything to drink, you know, before bed, and sometimes I’d say, “Yeah,” you know, “I want a glass of water,” just to see if you’d, if you’d do it, if you meant it, and you did. Hm, you’d bring it up, right? You’d put it on the nightstand, and then, you’d give me a little kiss, and you’d tell me you loved me. Then you’d look over at your dad, and… you’d tell him you loved him, too, but without the kiss. And then… I don’t know, somewhere, like, around… eight or nine, you just, you-you darkened. Do you remember those years?

N: Not really, no.

M: God, I used to ask your dad, I was like, “Did a baseball hit him in the head? “Did he get a concussion? Did something happen? I just-I don’t understand.” It was such a drastic change, and I, I swear–

N: What’s the fucking point? What’s the point of all this?

M: Look, I’m just-I’m just tryin’ to figure out how things ended up the way they ended up. That’s all.

N: I feel like you’re tryin’ to say something without sayin’ it.

M: I-I’m not. Just… forget I–

(Marsha sighs)

#conversation: nate & marsha

[jenanddomo]

1.19.23

today the day i finally move on. im glad he block me on here unless i did idk. i blocked him everywhere. phone number to roblox . i finally deleted every picture of us. well what used to be “us”

i actually cherish the moments we had from beginning to end. i remember when we used to send selfies to eachother n how we would fight who would do what more in the beginning. i remember just being over heels for u , i even thought we werent even gon get together or last for a month. but we grew up for basically 3 years together n saw us become adults .

it sad it had to end like this. it ended in the most heart wrenching way for me. maybe not for u. but then in a way realization hit. this was for the best.

n my gut was right. i remember the time we would just smile after every kiss we did,every hug, even dumb arguments in person we would smile. i remember our dumb inside jokes with miss ***** and dont go to the restroom youll die type beat. i remember the time in december 2019 how we huddled together to stay warm infront of the gym and we just laughed and smile abt it. the first time we kissed n u didnt realize it til i kissed u the third time n we were watching helen keller i think lol. i remember when i used to write u love notes n little drawings for u to keep. n i remember the letter u gave me n how u said u had to write a in a fancy way lol. i regret throwin that away . i only remember some of what it said.

their were up n downs, mostly down lol . but we did have alot of love to give to eachother everytime we saw eachother. i remember just loving to be in his arms n fighting over one spot on the couch just so one of us can lay. or the time ill try to be big spoon n we would just fight. or when we would be ghost together in blankets n just cuddle . i remember we woudlnt even pay attention to movies bc all we will do is make fun of eachother n focus on eachother. lol i remember pretending to be alll sad n depressed everytime he left my house.

i remember our fights . we were both so jealous. so controllin too. im sorry for being so controlling and jealous at the time. now i realize we were being dumb n we needed to trust eachother. but it all started to go downhill when we both lied to eachother.

this is my realization that the relationship was so bad. im startin to remember all the bad things me n him did. i dont wan remember bc i just regret fighting n just arguing. i regret slapping him at school. i regret just being so ugly ard him. all i ever was to be just his n just his. i fell in love so hard for him that i just wanted him n only him. even if he didnt believe me i would say it.

that was my problem, i overthought everything bc how madly in love i was . for me, he was my everything, my world, n at the time i would die for him. do anything for him, but at the same time i would atleast have control over myself n try to do wtv even tho i wouldnt let him do wtv. it so weird not talkin to guys for atleast 3 years . when i blocked him i realize i had freedom . for the first time i didnt know what to do. it like a baby comin out of a womb n just cryin n not knowin wtf to do. it was so weird first time in ever i see nothing abt, tryin so hard not to think abt him . n this week i been trying to do self care n workout but i fucked up my sleepin schedule n diet bc since i dont eat as much -below 1000 cals-

since i eat below 1000 cals i lost most of my energy n just tryna make money made it worse.

it was so weird when his bsf started to follow everything n jst like my stuff. like he a hoe no cap

but lol

idk i can’t speak on things.

i can’t speak abt this no more.

i just hope she makes him happier n not miserable like i did. n i hope he finally loves himself n do better for him. but i really hope he can be happy with n without someone n just be a better bf for someone else n hopefully learn from our mistakes.

ill like to describe this relationship as

karmic

“A karmic relationship is one that's filled with all-consuming passion but is extremely difficult to maintain,”

we loved eachother so much but our personalities were always so different eversince the beginning.

hopefully we can talk again in the future. maybe in the future ? maybe when i finally get over over u. i cant bare to see u rn bc ik ill just fall in love again , i just wan see u as sum1 i used to know.

its so funny how i tried to atleast make him jealous lolllollol :p i was so dumb n childish

i dont like nobody

i love to lie so ppl dont think im weak

i only loved him

but he doesn’t love me

anyways

im glad i didnt cry makin this post:) girlboss

hopefully i do the things i wan today bc i just got 100 bucks:) also may never post again

[ashtoninbloom]

[text]: You do. You feel like you can't say no to any opportunity out of fear that it makes you seem ungrateful for being where you are, or maybe that opportunity is 'the one' that gets you to where you want to be. It's a vicious cycle, especially when you're thrust into the spotlight at such a young age. It changes your life – in both good ways and bad. I will say, I'm glad I paid my dues back then because I don't know if I can handle the demands of certain aspects of my job anymore and I'm grateful for the things I'm able to do now because I built that back then. And I'm well aware that I was able to still be young and a little dumb, whereas I don't know that you had that luxury. It's great that you're able to still be with your soulmate on tour, but I don't blame you for not wanting to be too far from home for too long anymore. Especially when you're looking to grow roots with your family. It's nice being a little settled and feeling like you have somewhat of a routine. It makes the traveling that much sweeter. We're wishing our hardest and anxiously awaiting the call! That's so nice! You'll be able to visit her often? You'll have to send me all the pictures and videos so we feel like we're there with you throughout the entire journey. The happiness I feel right now for you both and this beautiful life you're going to live is so insane. Nothing makes me happier than seeing the people I care about most living their most incredible, amazing, happiest lives. He's hands-down the greatest human I've ever met in my life. Everyone always tells him he's lucky to have found me, but I'm even luckier to have found him. He's restored my faith in so many things and has shown me what true love feels like. He's everything I've ever dreamed of and so, so much more. I could sit here and gush about him all day long. Yes and no. The moment she was put in my arms, I felt this overwhelming desire to protect her. That desire is what drives every decision I make when it comes to her. Now, I can't say we're doing everything perfectly, but she's happy, healthy and safe. There are times where i fumble or feel overwhelmed by it all, but I just love her so much and that's what keeps me going. It's hard to explain but you'll feel it too, one day soon hopefully. No nannies yet and I don't know if it's something we want. We're lucky to have people around us who are able to help us out in a pinch, but we're also lucky that my schedule is a little more flexible these days. And since we work mostly out of Jas' house for JOJA it's easy for me to bring her along. Marriage looks like a dream and the most fun, but I'm not in a rush. I'd be lying if I said I didn't want it but it'll happen when it's meant to. You had to be married for the surrogacy portion? I don't know how I feel about that. It feels a little....antiquated. But I also look at families differently than most people do. She is, not only by us but by our closest circle too. She's the luckiest girl in the world. Hmmm, maybe you can introduce her to them this weekend 😉

[ text ]: that's exactly it. you don't really think you're allowed to say no, not when the opportunities are given to you. they make it seem like saying no would close all these doors and that's how they get you. i feel like you're probably on such a level now that you can take the jobs that excite you, and you can work as much or as little as you want. the sweet spot, basically. you've grown into a savvy businesswoman and you're in charge of your own career and fortune and that's honestly so fucking cool. i'm endlessly proud of you for that, especially since the modeling world can't be the easiest to navigate. most of the tour takes place on a bus, where we gotta sleep in single bunks three feet away from mike and cal. it's not really ideal, even if i'm lucky we get to always be together. i was against having kids at first, honestly. i didn't think i had it in me to be a parent but the more we talked about it and talked about what our future would be like, the more the idea grew on me. now, i can't fucking wait. as soon as we know and have something, you'll be getting so many updates. you're both lucky to then. a true partnership like that is so rare; you balance each other and bring out the best in each other. the right give and take balance. i don't think a perfect mother exists, you're human, learning how to care for little human. she's growing up safe, wanted and loved; she's a very lucky little girl. lucky you get to be home more to enjoy it. a nanny seems like it'd be practical but i don't know if i'd ever be comfortable letting a stranger take care of my child, even if they were properly vetted beforehand and qualified. marriage made the legal stuff required for surrogacy easier. being able to both make decisions about the process legally made it come together faster and it makes sure we have equal rights to decide things for the baby. it's not the easiest system to navigate, so being able to skip some of the red tape was a blessing. marriage is pretty great but it's not necessary to be a family. you and aaron have a solid, happy relationship and that's the main thing. will be my pleasure to do a little a capella rendition for the princess, to see which of those strike her fancy more.

#| &. texts #long post tw

[libidomechanica]

With every placed like

With every placed like the  business passion in your soaring some  slighted at hour in Old Spain and past so  pert to see such—the early melted  down a mother cry, “o mist abhorrd: for  the world had occasion oer time, shall stood 

in master— than the Bridges,  but not bleed in the hideous pangs refinement  with cant, while, but cavalier  of glistring you pleasantern and you see  the Vade Mecum of a hangman, quite  rose rich every you both indeed, if 

to thrust us bend, ‘Incense for  the conquer love all we for Hebrew  noun which grow skittish, ive gone that we butchers  coward to make loving heads, as if  well asleeping’, with their crimes; but your  face, he dog-days what we known the new and 

that her has magnanimity; who  cause mutes for four bad lucus from the  usual merit after m ortals or naebody. And then—they scarce for  his legal farce! D on board, and there he tulips  but on so somewhere monstrous journey, wee making 

out bee-like, sparent to pierced organ voice, along  cloud of which for? This is  all into plague thirst since and l awless a laborious and broken without  me you lover— all, could leaves with tears  will better looks a smiled which hearts delight, 

eight: if any of his my you go with  pity head upon the world of  speech the Southeyll have no more of the  tank, dumb: but her forget through a  certainly those bodies; and brandys last the  chaste, she knew what their price of twenty-

five outran their traps forests—  great: it is below love with  the very little still each news but  not yet quite and learned minutive cal him?  With him when in their  sense of Cheops erected are your 

conduct like him, and a brief is  it then that eer should it wordinand,  Christian quite of crime: with due  read to get awaits full make thread, the  sweets full choice that once with all amountain  me: how fever-after, that my Pegasus 

have little strange it breech; and life, that  night difficult straight in lie, viewed countrys woes, to  news were manner at niplet one or  drop, and far as like the into  highest pitchd there I know what cherished  and judged patience, hint to her bright charms 

bare until the less chorus flown back as  earthquake; at shown into Flight  inherit in passport; quicken say which keep me cloudy  night to make it was square flesh  and so rare, and throttle across the lynx,  the eye of good, had so is that 

place, and sober nights. And devoutly wise,  and his Tears his carriage. They are  describes in Cantemir, or in proper  perspective, hand, and you speakers buy; some thought up  into place of theology.  Dancing so. (Glory might the same from which 

he day: and the might growing that cause  of an honour weed: and when  thy voices dying far from very days  the could remnant and no begin to  be died; and, shelter of Beauty of  child, the weak. Until at once is long for 

a spirits dried there thee. To  tell you contagu. Let me, we believe my hear it, ‘ twould against their smiles at his new  expectablets has to save each with  cloak, I will night; my heart a-dying at  some congruity those kingly swollen purple through, 

so surrection of Melrose use dependenturion  serves throat my heard her serious coffins hearts  best for rest to disrupt your like can  should she silence was, the plain  hand with my sex? But dreams; my boatmen, the  very spot, thought, which were fitted 

shown, (not this pond answerd but all have not my heart  to beating them long-settle, one of  air-balloons of the gentle eyes  blows;’) and I hurt heart, and power orderd round:  with a baby on him through, And  smooth as fast by the blade a marble 

even some exchange to earn them well know— no more command. more I ween of the poesy,)  and that love is certain or station  as Earth with a raccoon. Our  hearts: he shall we could not my fingers— heirlooms.  Even the Englishwoman this kind it 

would Popes laurels should best wonder, or (if you  may makes us lie in vain) to hints  doves, and if young gilded joints, when myself  upon these untoward from the  many wording soft October night; o, for ( to time worse by the good 

#poetry #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Markov chains #Markov chain length: 5 #147 texts