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pigeon-system-boys · 25 days

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I LOVE YOU SYSTEMS

YES YOU TOO

Even if you were told that you are gross

Even with alters with PrObLeMaTiC Source (don't care, you aren't your fucking source!!!)

Even if your persecutors and protectors act like pieces of shit (they are trying and are fucking up. A lot of times. But they're trying!!)

Even if your littles are sexual protectors (VALID) (YOU DON'T CHOOSE ALTER ROLES)

Even if you can't heal right now

Even if you are happy that you are system

Even if you ARE NOT happy about being system

Even if you have NO CLUE what tf was your trauma

Even if you have your trauma 360° full HD scarred into your brain

If you want to know your trauma and if you don't

If your system is full of abuse (don't say you are bad person, you aren't, your brain tries to COPE)

Even if your trauma was "not enoth", even if it was "too much"

Even if you don't love yourself

Especially if you don't love yourself

I am here for you

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starlitvases · 3 months

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I'm so tired of joining syscord servers and seeing "fusion" and "integration" and "dormancy" on blacklists. Those terms are quite literally indicative of healing. It means I'm healing and I'm not as traumatized from being thoroughly abused. Why the fuck do I need to censor my healing? Why do I need to censor when GOOD things happen to me? Fuck syscord for having this notion that fusion, integration, and dormancy are bad things

#did system #programmed system #dissociative identity disorder #did osdd #osddid #osdd did #osdd #actually did #did #dissociative system

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ridibulous · 4 months

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I'm having a bit of a normal one tonight so

• shoutout to hc-did systems who don't have a fucking clue what all their programs are or how exactly they work or how they're triggered and may constantly be living like they're walking on eggshells.

• shoutout to hc-did systems who have no fucking idea what the full extent of their trauma is and are terrified to figure out more and/or want to learn everything that happened so badly.

• shoutout to hc-did systems who don't know or understand everything about their innerworld. fuck it shoutout to hc-did systems who just Don't Know in general!

• shoutout to hc-did systems who don't have any "real" or "physical" proof of their ramcoa besides their own memories.

• shoutout to hc-did systems whos perpetrators never got a lick of punishment for what they did to you or others.

• shoutout to hc-did systems who actively want or are trying to get their perpetrators punished for what they did.

• shoutout to hc-did systems who can't have their perpetrators punished for what they did.

• shoutout to hc-did systems who might still be in danger. real or perceived.

this ramcoa shit is so confusing and exhausting and horrible and lonely and fucking (re)traumatizing and it's so hard. i'm tired I just want people to believe me sometimes but how much do I believe other people believe me when I share the sheer horrors that rear their ugly heads in our mind. from alters popping up or a memory just appearing out of nowhere to just whole somatic flashbacks. how much can we take? how much DID we take?

#hc did #ramcoa #tbmc #hc did system #ramcoa system #programmed system #programmed did #endos dni #endos fuck off #ESPECIALLY for this post #do not derail #this is like half of a vent post. I think

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the-firefly-jar-system · 7 months

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RAMCOA/programmed/HC-DID systems feel free to add onto this, but as a non-RAMCOA system I really think we need to stop trying to police RAMCOA survivor’s language.

They have experienced horrors that we can barely comprehend when they were CHILDREN, sometimes INFANTS. They are trying to find community by labeling their unique experiences that are objectively more complex than many others. So many non-RAMCOA systems are butthurt over HC-DID systems calling themselves “highly complex”, seemingly just because it “invalidates other’s trauma”.

Trauma experiences that are more severe than yours will always exist, and the survivors of those experiences will always speak out about them. By claiming that these people are “playing trauma olympics” by simply speaking out about and labeling their stories, we are actively silencing survivors of severe abuse. Acknowledging that some experiences are more complex than others is not inherently downplaying the validity of the less complex experiences.

Because the nature of RAMCOA survivor’s experiences is near impossible to grasp for us non-survivors, we need to understand that we are stepping out of our lane by trying to involve ourselves in the conversations about RAMCOA exclusive labels. It’s perfectly acceptable for systems to ask non-systems to not get involved in system discourse, and the response should be the same for programmed systems asking non-programmed systems to not get involved in RAMCOA discourse.

Again, I’d love if any RAMCOA systems would like to add onto this! This is just our perspective as a system who is not a survivor, and we’re open to any additions or criticisms.

#ramcoa #ramcoa survivor #cult survivor #hc did #hcdid #tbmc #dbmc #hc did system #ramcoa system #programmed system #firefly flickers

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sys-thoughts · 5 months

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Friendly reminder

You can choose to not have a stance. You don't need to have a stance on everything. It's okay to choose to not have an opinion on discourse. It doesn't make you stupid, or indecisive. It might just mean you aren't educated enough, or it's a topic you aren't really bothered with.

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ram-like · 2 months

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caution post on ethan/dreamkingdomaine

please read the edit 2 at the bottom

a few weeks ago, in the beginning of february, ethan messaged one of my friends on tumblr to ask if he wanted to make a private discord server to talk. at this time, ethan's tumblr said he was 41 years old, which he then confirmed in a message with my friend. his (my friend's) tumblr bio says that she is an adult, but doesn't dictate his full age.

ethan messaged him on discord, again confirming that he is fourty-one, but stopped messaging & unfriended him when my friend said she was 18 & therefore they shouldn't be talking.

however, ethan then changed the age on his account to 24.

he then messaged me, asking a very similar thing, however whilst he claimed he didn't realise my friend was 18 (and in a later message, that much of the tumblr did community is <25) my age is very obviously stated in my bio (and I am 17 years old, making me a legal minor.)

ethan has not messaged any of my other friends on tumblr, who state that they are adults in their bio, & i don't know the extent to which he has interacted with members on here.

his behaviour therefore is incredibly predatory seeming, particularly the changing of his reported age, & i presume he was operating under the assumption that me and my friend didn't know each other and therefore wouldn't discuss this.

ethan's discord user ID is 339913311573245954. i advise everyone who owns or moderates a server focused on did/trauma that's available to find on tumblr to preban him, especially if there are minors in your community, and block him on tumblr. this is not the behaviour of a responsible & trustworthy adult.

* edit/note: based on the blog history, this person has likely been doing this for YEARS. there are no other accounts with that name easily identifiable online, so this tumblr is likely a burner account. they have a year long post history of disappearing for a matter of months, and then coming back to ask people to DM them or message them on discord, presumably also messaging people in a similar manner to how they are now, originally in the roleplay community but more recently in trauma communities. and a reminder that again they are lying about their age after being told it was an uncomfortable difference by a young person they were attempting to privately speak too. please watch your interactions with this person.

* edit 2: as it turns out, this person has actually been a notorious predator in roleplay communities for years, with a long history of commission fraud & repeatedly requesting nsfw or rape-based plots. here's a post about his actions: https://www.tumblr.com/traumadreaming/743234181974425600/strngher-archived-despite-having-not-posted?source=share

please bear in mind the google docs in this post are EXTENSIVE and contain triggering materials at basically all points.

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anti-endo-haven · 24 days

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PSA: r/syscringe is telling everyone that RAMCOA systems aren't real, and are a conspiracy theory. Their only sources for this are the ableist Grey Faction, a sect of the Satanic Temple that denies dissociative identity disorder even exists.

If you even mention RAMCOA, the automod will pop up with a message linking to the Grey Faction website to explain why it doesn't exist.

It's incredibly important all RAMCOA systems are made aware of this before venturing in there.

RAMCOA survivors and systems are VERY real and not just some satanic panic or conspiracy theory thing that’s been made up.

It’s a serious thing that goes on and happens and is still happening.

I despise r/syscringe for shit like this.

I’m not TW ramcoa/tbmc/programming because this NEEDS to be known and made aware of.

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wxrmeaterz · 10 days

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shout out to programmed / ramcoa systems who...

- can never fully mentally mature

- were made to mature too young

- know and remember nothing or just snippets

- know and remember everything or most things

- can't currently access therapy for safety or personal reasons

- are currently in therapy

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pink-devolve · 2 months

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As someone who is a programmed PF-DID system, we need to stop using the term HC-DID. Here’s why ⬇️

1. The system that coined the term is a groomer and is anti-semitic. There is evidence(some screenshots included below) of the MayMay system(The 20y/o coiner of the term) being sexual towards minors up to 5 years younger than them. In MayMay’s discord server, 15 year olds are allowed in NSFW channels that have sexting in them. MayMay has joked about sexually assaulting a 16 y/o. There is a 15 year old that seems to always be with MayMay, and constantly talks about interacting with MayMay in a NSFW context. Etc etc etc. There have also been screenshots of MayMay using the term “Jew” as a derogatory insult.

2. The term excludes programmed systems that do not have a highly complex case of DID Many programmed systems can not use the term “HC-DID” due to having OSDD, not having PF-DID, etc. All programmed systems have distinct differences from non-programmed systems, but programmed systems without a highly complex case of DID don’t have a straightforward term to describe their experience. I’ve seen a lot of people use the term HC-DID and programmed interchangeably, and imo that’s not fair to other survivors trying to find community.

3. You can have a highly complex case of DID and not be programmed. You can have trauma that is just as extreme as the trauma experienced by programmed systems, end up with a highly complex case of PF-DID, and not be programmed. I’ve met some non-programmed PF-DID systems with insane system structures. One system I knew was not programmed, but had hundreds of different alters, all with very specific roles, hierarchy, and layers, that all fronted to do very specific tasks. They told me they had a specific alter who fronted to wash their hands, and another specific alter who fronted to sleep on wednesdays. Their case could absolutely be considered highly complex, but again, they weren’t programmed.

4. We have terms used/created by professionals, that don’t have any of these issues. The terms mind-controlled DID (MC-DID) and Torture based mind control DID (TBMC-DID) have both been coined by professionals, can be used with other plural disorders(MC-OSDD), or to describe all plural disorders at once(MC-system), can’t be used to describe non-programmed systems, etc.

Overall, I don’t have an issue with individuals that use the term HC-DID, I just think it’s annoying that it’s the default way to say “programmed system”. I honestly think the term is a fine way to describe systems with a highly complex structure, and should still be used in that context. But if we do that, the term should be open to non-programming survivors as well. There is absolutely no reason to fight over this term. It’s really not that deep. But if you’d like to debate respectfully I am happy to.

#actually did #ramcoa #did osdd #hc did #highly complex did #programmed system #programmed did #mcdid #programmed alter #tbmc #tbmc survivor #tw tbmc #tbmcdid #Tbmc did

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pigeon-system-boys · 4 months

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Systemhood:

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starlitvases · 4 months

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I really need people to understand that when I and other systems say, "I'm grateful for my system and I'm happy that I'm a system," it does not mean that we wanted to be systems.

I never wanted to go through horrific abuse to become a system. I never wanted to be programmed to be a system. I never wanted any of that. I wanted a happy and fulfilling childhood, but I didn't have that privilege. I never did.

My system is how I survived. It's how I was able to cope and actually live and breathe. I'd be dead without my system. Do I hate how we formed? Of course, I do. Do I hate my system? Not even in my dreams.

I'm allowed to be happy as a system, especially if it's what saved me. I'm allowed to be grateful that my system kept me alive and has allowed me to begin healing. I'm allowed to have happy moments. Don't misconstrue my words, and don't belittle anyone else who shares the same sentiment.

#did system #dissociative identity disorder #programmed system #programming survivor #ramcoa survivor #ramcoa #dissociative system #traumagenic system #programmed did #im allowed to heal

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requiemsystem · 4 months

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TRAUMA IS A RESPONSE, NOT AN EVENT

Something we see a lot in the community is people playing "trauma olympics", and I want to explain why it just doesn't make sense to compare traumas. Trauma refers to an event, yes, but it's much more about how your brain responded to that event that determines if it was traumatic for you or not. Trauma is not something that can be universally determined, as everyone has different reactions to things. Two people could both go through the exact same event that may or may not be widely considered traumatic, and one could come out with PTSD or a dissociative disorder and the other could come out with no trauma response whatsoever. Factors that play into if something is traumatic for you or not include age, access to support, general abilities to cope with stress, genetics, and more. Please stop saying some people have it worse than others, we are all traumatized. Regardless of if someone has trauma you consider "big" or "small", it still impacted them greatly. - Veritas

#did osdd #did system #osdd did #osdd system #actually dissociative #osddid #ramcoa #programmed system #ramcoa survivor #dissociative identity disorder #other specified dissociative disorder #did alters #actually did #c did #complex did #programmed did #did alter #traumagenic system #osdd

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scavangers-daughter · 3 months

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Transramcoa people stop cross tagging in RAMCOA tags challenge

#ramcoa survivor #ramcoa #programmed system #programming survivor #trauma based mind control #organized abuse #ritual abuse #mind control #tbmc #did #really tired of it #there are stronger things I’d like to say #but I’ll stick to passive aggressive lol

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sysboxes · 1 month

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[Text: This system is currently questioning if they’re highly complex, please be patient with them.]

[Text: This system is currently questioning if they’re extremely complex, please be patient with them.]

[Text: This system is currently questioning if they’re programmed, please be patient with them.]

Like/Reblog if you save or use

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sys-thoughts · 2 months

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The problem with survivors who are still hurting making content about their trauma, is that they sometimes cannot understand what is okay and what is not okay to post online.

The community has sadly normalised and validated intense trauma dumping without the proper tws.

#hc did #ramcoa #trauma based mind control #programmed system #tbmc #noahs sys thoughts #programming survivor #highly complex did #mind control

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ram-like · 3 months

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please stop listening to creators online as if they're the arbiters of knowledge on ramcoa. especially on like tiktok and instagram. if someone uses a word you can't find any information on its very likely they made it up!

me included. please don't treat anything I say as the be all/end all of information. if you don't like/believe anything I say PLEASE do your own research on it & make sure you feel secure in your opinions/knowledge.

#trauma survivor #cult survivor #did system #ramcoa #oea #oea survivor #ramcoa survivor #programmed system #programming survivor #tbmc

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