#so i guess I am an aromantic lesbian now huh???? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

elyvorg · 3 years

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So… I was talking about aspec V3 headcanons? Well then, let me lay down the facts.

Maki Harukawa is on the aromantic spectrum. Yes, even though she explicitly develops a crush on Kaito, and no, I’m not trying to dispute that part.

This is basically canon. Let me tell you why.

Maki is aro

For this, we need to consider the conversation Maki has with Shuichi in the first training session in chapter 4, while Kaito has temporarily disappeared to the bathroom. On one level, this conversation exists to be the only actual meaningful indication* that Maki has romantic feelings for Kaito until she goes and confesses them. Someone like Maki wouldn’t care about asking Shuichi if he “liked” Kaede (in that annoying loaded meaning of the word “like” that specifically refers to romantic attraction) unless she was trying to come to terms with the idea that she also “likes” someone else in the same way, and the only plausible candidate for that is Kaito.

But even more striking about this conversation, far more so than the general implication that Maki would only bother asking this if she happened to be crushing on a certain spiky-haired space dork, is the way Maki approaches and thinks about this whole topic in general. Take a look:

Maki: “Well… I assumed you didn’t, because that would be weird. […] Liking someone you just met… especially in a situation like this…”

Shuichi: “… Then tell me… under what circumstances is liking someone *not* weird?”

Maki: “…Huh? I… don’t know. I don’t… really understand what that is.”

I, as an aromantic person myself, fully agree with Maki that it just seems weird to start romantically liking someone you’ve only just met, especially in a life-or-death situation where surely there’s way more important things to be focusing on. But apparently, most people do not find this thought weird at all – love at first sight is supposedly a real thing that can happen, and something something dangerous situations can bring out more hormones and passion???? sounds fake but okay – and so opinions like mine and Maki’s here are very much outliers.

And not only that, not only does the thought of crushing on near-strangers bewilder Maki to the point of disbelief, but she also can’t even come up with an answer to when crushing on someone would ever not be strange and bizarre. Like the whole concept is just alien to her. She can barely even wrap her head around how “liking” someone in that way even works. The very reason she’s even asking Shuichi about this is because she doesn’t understand why she’s feeling this way about Kaito.

This is how an aromantic person would view this kind of thing. It doesn’t sound even slightly like something an alloromantic person would say in this situation. That’s not up for interpretation – that’s just the truth about these views that Maki is expressing. Again: I’m aromantic. I would know.

Even from a character who then does turn out to nonetheless have a crush on someone, these statements are pretty much as canonically confirmed arospec as you can get short of them straight up using the word "aromantic" or a variant.** And, well, obviously Maki isn't about to go calling herself that. From the way she’s questioning this, she clearly doesn’t realise that her perspective is the outlier, so she’s probably never even heard of the term. Besides, she most definitely has way bigger hurdles to be getting over first in terms of her self-acceptance before she's ever going to particularly care about figuring out labels for her orientation of all things.

Aros with trauma are still aros

Now, granted, I severely doubt that Maki being arospec is what the writers intended to convey. Haha, deliberate aro representation in mainstream Japanese media, especially something more complex than vanilla aro, that's a funny joke. What the writers probably meant by writing this conversation I just discussed is to suggest that Maki is viewing things this way a result of her trauma.

But hey, guess what? Even if it is because of her trauma - and I'm not denying that it probably is - that doesn't make Maki any less aro. Some people are arospec because of trauma, and that's equally as valid a reason to be arospec as without. Maybe Maki would have grown up alloromantic if she hadn't been scouted as an assassin, but that's irrelevant, because that's not the Maki who exists now.

In writing this conversation, the writers were presumably attempting to communicate that Maki is so messed up by having been manipulated and abused and moulded into a soulless killing machine that she can no longer comprehend the idea of how or why anybody (especially not herself) would fall in love with someone when they'd only just met, or even really in any circumstances at all. …And in doing that, the writers unintentionally wrote a character who, as a result of her trauma, is aro(-spec). This is an objective fact about the canon story that does not change just because the writers probably weren’t aware enough about aromanticism to actually realise this.

Aros who feel romantic attraction are still aros

So, of course, Maki does in fact come to romantically love Kaito despite this. That fact becomes very important to her, and me lengthily explaining here that she’s actually arospec is not remotely trying to diminish that. But it’s also very important to me that people realise that Maki’s romantic love for Kaito comes from an aromantic perspective. She eventually chooses to embrace those feelings not remotely because it just feels to her like the natural way things should go, but despite every single conscious part of her insisting that this is weird and illogical and doesn’t make any goddamn sense to even be happening at all. She is not going to suddenly fall into all the boring romantic cliches and stereotypical alloromantic approaches to love just because she does in fact happen to be experiencing romantic attraction. There’s nothing alloromantic about Maki’s crush on Kaito.***

As for the specific flavour of arospec that allowed Maki to fall in love with Kaito anyway? This part is somewhat more up for interpretation because there’s no real explicit indication of this in particular, but I personally like to go with the idea that Maki is demiromantic. It feels appropriate for Maki’s character and trauma to imagine that she can only begin to potentially feel romantic things towards a person when she has an emotional connection with them – when she trusts them and knows that they trust her. It doesn’t necessarily have to take very long – she’d only been friends with Kaito for a handful of days before that telling conversation with Shuichi – and she may not even have to have consciously admitted to herself that she trusts them, but she needs to have that bond. She’s normally so guarded and has such strong automatic barriers up during her interpersonal interactions that seeing most people in a romantic light literally isn’t even an option in her brain.

Maki’s confession of her feelings for Kaito does read as rather strongly demiromantic, I think. She makes a point that this is about who Kaito is and what he’s done for her, before even getting to the part where she admits to having fallen for him. And she says she “fell for” him, not that she was always in love with him or anything to that effect. This happened somewhere along the way during their friendship, because of their friendship, and because of Kaito being his incredible trusting supportive self towards her when she needed it most.

Maki Harukawa is demiromantic, and she’s wonderful.

---

[some grumpy Amatonormativity and Aro Erasure 101 footnotes, can you tell I am bitter about this kind of thing]

(* When I say “actual meaningful indication” of romantic feelings, I mean something that isn't just the narrative infuriatingly pointing at things that are actually perfectly platonic in nature and going “ooh look how romantic~!”. Newsflash: worrying about somebody and wanting to rescue them when they're sick and injured and have been kidnapped by someone you think is an evil sadistic mastermind is not somehow proof of romantic feelings. That is a thing that friends do. And on the same note, teaching somebody how to build a crossbow is not some kind of deep metaphor for romance; it is literally just a lesson in how to build a goddamn crossbow. Maki would have done both of these things in exactly the same way if her crush on Kaito didn’t exist.)

(** It's exactly like how characters can be considered canonically confirmed same-gender-attracted when all they've done is show attraction to the same gender****, without them actually needing to explicitly refer to themselves with the word “gay”, or “lesbian”, or “bi” or whatever else. Anyone who tried to insist that was necessary in order for it to “count” would instantly be written off as homophobic. So if that’s the case, then a character explicitly saying something such as “I don’t understand what it means to like someone that way” equally constitutes them being confirmed aro, and trying to argue that it doesn’t “count” without outright hearing the word itself is, guess what…?)

(*** This also inherently means that there’s nothing straight about Maki’s crush on Kaito either, since societally-expected “straight” attraction is allo as well as hetero. I gather that some people in this fandom like to devalue and erase Maki’s crush (and potentially also Maki herself) because they feel that it’s an Obligatory Forced Straight Romance and don’t like that, or something along those lines. Well, good news! It’s literally not that, actually, because Maki isn’t straight.)

(**** …This only applies so long as it actually is very clearly romantic or sexual attraction and not just people deciding platonic affection is totally romantic thanks to the disease that is amatonormativity. Because, you know. That happens. Literally all the time. (Even from V3’s narrative itself; see footnote 1.))

#danganronpa v3 #danganronpa v3 spoilers #maki harukawa #aspec headcanons #character analysis #ramble #amatonormativity #i've always been hesitant to bring this kind of thing up much because i didn't want to ruffle anyone's feathers #but you know what? screw it #i'm aroace and i hate amatonormativity and it's about time i started showing that more on this blog #and if anyone has a problem with that then actually that sounds like their problem and not mine #(with thanks to the previous post's anon for unintentionally spurring this out of me!)

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incorrectchoniberonicaswangs · 5 years

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hey baby won't you look my way (i can be your new addiction)

Chapter 7: gays you ever just ahsnfdjsl?? part 1

Chapter Summary: Holiday parties are planned, Cheryl and Toni are Kevin's sapphic moms, an intervention is held, Alice and Hermione are adorable and everyone loves them, Kangs has some news, and Sweet Pea runs away from his problems.

Notes: theMANtle: reggie

ao3

Friday, 3:17 PM

gays united

hbicheryl: its winter break!! finally a respite from the chaos!!

jugheadalones: im so excited!

hbicheryl: hold up, hobo is excited about something??

hisshissmotherfucker: ^^ jones are you sick

jugheadalones: okay, first of all fuck you

jugheadalones: second of all im excited to return to the near-comatose state i maintain every time we have a long period of time off from school

nopeaz: that makes more sense

veroffica: as enjoyable as that likely is to you, holden caulfield, it won't be happening this break. i'm hosting a christmas eve party at the pembrooke starting at 8:00 pm and you are all invited.

veroffica: and you'd better all show up, or else i'll sic my new bodyguard on you.

goingtoheller: i assume you mean betty.

wannabett: guilty :/

spillthefogarTEA: ill be there. and NOT because of your threats

spillthefogarTEA: even though betty is kind of intimidating

goingtoheller: i'll come as well.

nopeaz: cher and ill come too

hisshissmotherfucker: i love parties im there

jugheadalones: i dont suppose i really have a choice do i?

wannabett: not really. sorry jug

jugheadalones: fine.

hbicheryl: speaking of holiday parties

hbicheryl: new years eve party, thistlehouse, time tbd, if you arent there youre dead to me

veroffica: b and i will be there.

spillthefogarTEA: me too

goingtoheller: i'll be there.

hisshissmotherfucker: i hear cheryls parties are infamously dramatic

hisshissmotherfucker: so im definitely coming

hisshissmotherfucker: as long as i dont end up doing seven minutes in heaven with archie like veronica

veroffica: will nobody ever let me forget that??

hisshissmotherfucker: nope

jugheadalones: why do all these party invites come with threats of retribution if you dont attend?

hbicheryl: bc if there wasnt then youd never come

jugheadalones: ill come. begrudgingly.

nopeaz: and ofc ill be there obviously

jugheadalones: wait am i missing something? why is that obvious?

hbicheryl: oh right we didnt tell you lol

hbicheryl: tt moved in with me

goingtoheller: WHAT??

goingtoheller: my sapphic moms moved in together aND I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA??

hisshissmotherfucker: why is keller suddenly chonis kid when did this happen??

hbicheryl: please kevin is basically toni and i's love child

hbicheryl: he has my sass (well not as good as mine but hes trying), my gayness, and my strange desire for dumbass serpents

nopeaz: and my propensity for saying 'this is riveting i cant breathe'

goingtoheller: aw, thanks, moms! mostly! :)

nopeaz: no problem son

hbicheryl: yes we are very proud of you kev (mostly)

jugheadalones: huh i never actually thought about it but that... works?

wannabett: okay cheryl and toni are like the least qualified people here to be anyones lesbian moms?? theyre literally gang members??

hbicheryl: stfu nightmare smurfette do not EVER criticize my parenting skills

hbicheryl: toni and i have slaved for weeks, even MONTHS to make sure that kevin turns into a proper young gay man

hbicheryl: and you have the AUDACITY to suggest that just because my gf and i are deeply flawed people we would corrupt poor kevin??

wannabett: uh... no?

hbicheryl: thats what i thought

nopeaz: wow angry cheryl is scary but hot

spillthefogarTEA: topaz, you are so whipped

spillthefogarTEA: and REALLY fucking gay

nopeaz: yeah ik

jugheadalones: moving on

jugheadalones: speaking of people taking a big step and deciding to live with each other... betty and veronica, we need to talk.

veroffica: um... what?

veroffica: is this some sort of intervention?

hisshissmotherfucker: yes

spillthefogarTEA: moving in together might be considered friendly if, say, betty didnt already have a house that she lives in

nopeaz: but this decision is beyond simple friendship

hbicheryl: and its certainly anything but heterosexual

wannabett: why are you guys finishing each others sentences?? did you plan this??

hisshissmotherfucker: no shit sherlock

veroffica: how do you guys even have this information??

goingtoheller: we have our ways.

wannabett: archie somehow saw our texts through my window

wannabett: jughead told me last night, sorry i didnt tell you v, i didnt know that this was going to happen

nopeaz: dammit jones why do you have to ruin all our fun!!

jugheadalones: i didnt realize that this was a rule?

jugheadalones: so anyway

jugheadalones: b&v, now that you have been confronted with cold hard proof of your undying love for each other, what do you have to say for yourselves?

wannabett: guys im straight!!

goingtoheller: ooh, betty's pulling the straight card.

hbicheryl: i called it! tt, sp, fangs, and jughead, you all owe me $10

hbicheryl: cousin betty is nothing if not predictable in the face of her sexuality being questioned

veroffica: hey, you made bets on this?? not cool!

wannabett: ^^^^

wannabett: and i am NOT predictable!!

hbicheryl: i predicted she was going to say that

hbicheryl: thats another $10 guys

hisshissmotherfucker: for once i trusted in someones willingness to admit when they were wrong and now because of that cheryl is robbing us blind! smh never again

spillthefogarTEA: veronica? you never answered the question

veroffica: uh...

veroffica: i mean, um...

veroffica: we've never even kissed! i'm pretty sure we aren't dating!

nopeaz: to be fair though i wouldnt be surprised if you two were dating without knowing it

veroffica: guys, now really isn't a good time.

jugheadalones: mmmhmm

wannabett: no seriously v and i are getting ready for the christmas eve party

wannabett: its in three days remember

hbicheryl: ugh fine i suppose thats a reasonable explanation

veroffica: and since i know that you won't let this go, at the party you can ask us whatever you want about this.

goingtoheller: wait... for real?

wannabett: uh yeah really v??

veroffica: within reason, of course.

spillthefogarTEA: wow this is more than i expected to come from this

veroffica: one condition, though. you can't pester b and i about it before the party.

veroffica: deal?

hisshissmotherfucker: deal

wannabett: now that thats settled v and i are going to get to work

veroffica: we'll probably be off the grid until maybe a few hours before the party.

[wannabett is offline]

[veroffica is offline]

hbicheryl: toni and i are already headed over to pops, anyone want to join us?

jugheadalones: wont we just be three-wheeling?

hbicheryl: not if we are in a large group

hisshissmotherfucker: ill come if you come jones

jugheadalones: sure.

hisshissmotherfucker: ill be there in five

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

jugheadalones: kevin, fangs?

spillthefogarTEA: im good

goingtoheller: ^^

nopeaz: okay otw

[nopeaz is offline]

[hbicheryl is offline]

jugheadalones: leaving now

[jugheadalones is offline]

6:35 PM

nopeaz: GUYS YOULL NEVER BELIEVE WHO JUST WALKED IN

spillthefogarTEA: who is it??

spillthefogarTEA: tell me you know im not good with suspense!!

jugheadalones: its alice cooper and hermione lodge!

hisshissmotherfucker: it seems as though archies intel was correct again

hisshissmotherfucker: damn that omniscient fucking northsider

hbicheryl: now i really wish that betty and veronica werent offline so they could hear about this

goingtoheller: why? do you hate them?

hbicheryl: hate is a strong word

hbicheryl: id say that i just occasionally want them to suffer

goingtoheller: that isn't much better...

hbicheryl: i guess ill just have to wait until the party to tell them

nopeaz: okay so they just got a booth and its basically diagonal from ours

jugheadalones: but theyre so enamoured with each other i dont think they even noticed that were here

hbicheryl: wow i dont think ive ever seen aunt alice this happy before

spillthefogarTEA: ugh this sounds so adorable i wish i was there

hisshissmotherfucker: dont worry well narrate their every movement so well itll be like you are

nopeaz: oh shit they keep reaching for each other like every five seconds

spillthefogarTEA: im WEAK

jugheadalones: its so hard to believe that they ever hated each other with the way theyre acting now

jugheadalones: homophobia can really fuck shit up huh

goingtoheller: this is the couple i never knew i needed, but now that i have seen that it's possible, i'm in love.

hisshissmotherfucker: im in shock i cant believe that the same alice cooper that grounded her daughter from any and all contact with the outside world is now just essentially the personification of heart eyes

hbicheryl: this town is so small were all basically inbred

hbicheryl: next thing you know fp and fred are going to be fucking too

jugheadalones: okay i did NOT need that image

nopeaz: AHHHH THEY WENT IN FOR A KISS MAYDAY MAYDAY THIS IS NOT A DRILL

spillthefogarTEA: AHHHHH

goingtoheller: AHHHHHHH

nopeaz: AHHHHHHH

jugheadalones: even i, being asexual and aromantic, have to admit that im loving living vicariously through these two

hisshissmotherfucker: k so they stopped

hisshissmotherfucker: wait no theyre kissing again!

hisshissmotherfucker: and again!

hisshissmotherfucker: okay now theyre just making out

nopeaz: get it girl(s)

hbicheryl: its getting pretty heated

hbicheryl: it feels like the windows are going to start fogging up

jugheadalones: oh damn they stopped

jugheadalones: ms cooper is waving pop over now

goingtoheller: is it creepy that we're so invested in their date?

spillthefogarTEA: probably not

hisshissmotherfucker: nah

jugheadalones: lets go with no

nopeaz: nope

hbicheryl: its only creepy if we get turned on

goingtoheller: moving on... what's happening now??

nopeaz: they got the check and now theyre paying

nopeaz: they can barely keep their hands off of each other

nopeaz: now theyre leaving

nopeaz: should i follow them to keep narrating?

goingtoheller: won't they notice??

jugheadalones: no theyve only got eyes for each other

jugheadalones: follow them SUBTLY while we hold down the table

nopeaz: roger that

hbicheryl: youre such a nerd

nopeaz: you love it

hbicheryl: duh

hbicheryl: now follow them!!

nopeaz: already doing it

nopeaz: so they made it to their car

nopeaz: okay wow wasnt expecting that but im not complaining

spillthefogarTEA: whats happening???

nopeaz: alice just shoved hermione up against the car door and now theyre hardcore making out

nopeaz: damn i wonder if theyre even going to get home or if theyre just going to do it in the parking lot

hisshissmotherfucker: i cant believe alice cooper and mayor lodge BOTH have better sex lives than i do wtf

goingtoheller: who knew that hermione lodge was such a bottom??

hbicheryl: well you know what they say about people in positions of power

hbicheryl: top in the streets bottom in the sheets

jugheadalones: wait cheryl that could apply to you as well

spillthefogarTEA: ooh is the class president getting the strap from the vice president

nopeaz: fuck off fangs

nopeaz: okay so they finally managed to regain some semblance of control

nopeaz: aaaaand theyre driving away

nopeaz: shows over folks

hbicheryl: lets clear out men

nopeaz: meet me by the bike cher

hbicheryl: be there in a sec babe xx

jugheadalones: wait are you telling me that cheryl blossom rode a motorcycle??

hisshissmotherfucker: yeah red i thought you said they were death traps

hbicheryl: well yeah but that was before i got on it

hbicheryl: its like a giant vibrator

hbicheryl: and riding it with toni is basically just the most acceptable type of public sex

goingtoheller: gross.

hisshissmotherfucker: never thought id agree with keller but yeah tmi

nopeaz: whatever

nopeaz: bye fuckers see you all at veronicas party

[nopeaz is offline]

[hbicheryl is offline]

jugheadalones: im headed out too

[jugheadalones is offline]

hisshissmotherfucker: me too

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

Monday, 6:43 PM

wannabett: b&v are back bitches!!

veroffica: and, looking through the chat from the past few days... i'm glad i was gone.

wannabett: although now i know what 'hot date' my mom was talking about :/

wannabett: even though i never wanted to know

wannabett: some things are best kept secret especially when your mom goes out on a date with your best friends mom!!

hbicheryl: youre welcome :)

veroffica: cheryl, at this very moment, i simultaneously respect, despise, and fear you.

hbicheryl: aw thanks thats what im always going for!

veroffica: anyway, the party will be starting in an hour or so, but some of my relatives will be over in the meantime. if you've got anything to say that doesn't involve the date my mom and betty's mom have, feel free. if you don't, go to hell.

hisshissmotherfucker: hey im in the neighborhood and i dont have anything else to do would you mind if i came over now

veroffica: sure thing!

hisshissmotherfucker: are you sure your relatives will be fine with me being there?

veroffica: yeah. i mean, betty's here too anyway!

hisshissmotherfucker: k

6:48 PM

goingtoheller + veroffica

goingtoheller: hey, would you happen to have some time you could set away during the party? fangs and i have an announcement we'd like to make.

veroffica: sure thing, kev. how does around 10 sound?

goingtoheller: perfect. thanks, v!

veroffica: no problem.

7:22 PM

gays united

hisshissmotherfucker: rn betty looks like she cant decide whether to be a guard dog or an excited puppy lmao

jugheadalones: context?

hisshissmotherfucker: veronicas greeting her relatives and bettys following her so closely shes practically stepping on her heels

goingtoheller: well, v is definitely holding betty's leash.

nopeaz: yeah veronicas got her by the collar

spillthefogarTEA: if betty doesnt watch her step then shes really going to be in the doghouse

wannabett: stop with the dog puns!! i am not a dog!!

hbicheryl: okay but you have to admit those were pretty good

wannabett: i will admit no such thing! now if youll excuse me im going to go back to talking to ronnies relatives with her

[wannabett is offline]

hisshissmotherfucker: i guess ill keep you all informed on their gay shenanigans

nopeaz: who even says shenanigans anymore??

hisshissmotherfucker: uh i do fight me

nopeaz: square up bitch

hbicheryl: if i had a dollar for every time tt and sp said that they were going to fight i would have enough money to rebuild thornhill

goingtoheller: cheryl, you're the one who burned it down in the first place.

hbicheryl: yes and??

goingtoheller: ...nevermind.

hisshissmotherfucker: im snoRTING

jugheadalones: what happened?

hisshissmotherfucker: so veronica was talking to one of her relatives right

hisshissmotherfucker: and the relative asks her if she has a boyfriend

hisshissmotherfucker: veronica laughs a little and says no so her relative looks at betty whos still trailing behind her like a shadow

hisshissmotherfucker: and knowingly says "oh i see, a girlfriend"

spillthefogarTEA: ajklfshagak i cant even

hisshissmotherfucker: both of them are sputtering uncontrollably unable to formulate a response im dying

hbicheryl: ahahah it was only a matter of time before something like this happened but im really glad it did

nopeaz: i mean relatives are supposed to know you better than anyone else right?

jugheadalones: oh b&v you oblivious wlw

goingtoheller: we're never letting them let this down, are we?

spillthefogarTEA: not a chance

hisshissmotherfucker: IT GOT BETTER

hisshissmotherfucker: veronica finally managed to speak and she (unconvincingly) insisted that she and betty were just friends etc etc and her relative just raised her eyebrows and went "mmhm"

nopeaz: drag themmmmm

hbicheryl: omg we stan

hisshissmotherfucker: im trying to stifle my laughter bc betty and veronica look like they want to murder me

hisshissmotherfucker: but you know what screw it its worth it

hisshissmotherfucker: oh shit bettys coming over here and she looks pissed

hisshissmotherfucker: hello punks, this is betty. i hope youve had your fun listening to sweet pea narrate everything but now im taking his phone and wont be giving it back until the party starts

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

jugheadalones: awww

goingtoheller: at least the party starts soon anyway. then, i'm sure we'll get even more beronica fodder.

jugheadalones: true

hbicheryl: see you then losers

spillthefogarTEA: back at ya cheryl

7:48 PM

nopeaz: cher and i are on our way

goingtoheller: fangs and i are leaving now.

jugheadalones: and im at your door at this very moment

jugheadalones: let me in

jugheadalones: okay great im in

hisshissmotherfucker: and i just got my phone back

hisshissmotherfucker: i will not stand for this tyranny! this is a republic not a monarchy!

wannabett: keep it up and im taking your phone back

hisshissmotherfucker: the oppression continues...

wannabett: sweet pea...

hisshissmotherfucker: fine

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

veroffica: now, let's get this party started!

10:03 PM

spillthefogarTEA: hey guys i know this is fun and exciting and all but would you mind congregating out in the living room? ive got some news

hisshissmotherfucker: anything for my best bro

jugheadalones: sure thing

10:07 PM

hisshissmotherfucker + theMANtle

hisshissmotherfucker: hey mantle are you free rn

theMANtle: yeah, you want me to come over to your trailer?

hisshissmotherfucker: yep im on my way there too

hisshissmotherfucker: see you in ten?

theMANtle: none of your friends will be there, right?

hisshissmotherfucker: nah theyre all still at veronicas party they wont even notice that im gone

theMANtle: not that im complaining, but why arent you?

hisshissmotherfucker: i needed a break

theMANtle: so you were hoping that i could help you blow off some steam? ;)

hisshissmotherfucker: that was the general idea

theMANtle: youre in luck, then. i currently have a lot of free time and what many call an impressive amount of stamina.

hisshissmotherfucker: perfect

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

10:15 PM

gays united

spillthefogarTEA: hey has anyone seen sweet pea? i could have sworn that i saw him before kevin and i made our announcement but now i cant find him anywhere

nopeaz: hes probably just in the bathroom or brooding in the corner somewhere

hbicheryl: dont worry about him just celebrate! youve officially got a new boyfriend!

spillthefogarTEA: "dont worry about him" have you MET me??

goingtoheller: babe, he probably just got bored and bailed.

goingtoheller: i know that he's your best friend, but he isn't who you're dating--i am. can't you forget about sweet pea for a little while and just relax?

spillthefogarTEA: i guess so

goingtoheller: great!

spillthefogarTEA: ill just text sp real quick and attempt to verify that hes still alive first

goingtoheller: whatever you need to do, fangs. i'll see you afterward.

10:19 PM

spillthefogarTEA + hisshissmotherfucker

spillthefogarTEA: hey sweets, i just wanted to make sure you didnt do anything stupid

spillthefogarTEA: i know that you arent kevins biggest fan, but youre my best friend and i dont want to lose you over him

spillthefogarTEA: i wish you were here to celebrate with me but i get it if you cant

spillthefogarTEA: please, just text me back whenever you see this to let me know that youre okay.

[spillthefogarTEA is offline]

10:41 PM

hisshissmotherfucker: thanks for being so understanding fangs but ngl i dont know if i can handle you dating keller

hisshissmotherfucker: i mean like you said

hisshissmotherfucker: we're best friends

hisshissmotherfucker: so i shouldnt have a problem with you going out with whoever you want

hisshissmotherfucker: but something about him just rubs me the wrong way

hisshissmotherfucker: sorry if that wasnt what you wanted to hear

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

Notes: Sorry, this was supposed to just be a long holiday chapter, but I had so many ideas I had to split it into two. Bear with me, please! Also, happy new year, gays! As 20gayteen comes to a close, I hope you find even more peace, prosperity, and (of course) bisexuality in 20biteen!!

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fagraymond · 2 years

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DISCLAIMER : HI, don't be fooled, this isn't an nsfw cxc shipping blog, it's a c writing blog and conventionally some of them. they fuck sometimes ( EDIT; sorry it's all just kinda sex and balls now )

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RULES // GUIDELINES :

i write anything on this blog that i want to, meaning that there are pairings in both sexual AND romantic lights that most people may not want ( okay this started off as an sfw blog for moreid and now i have a fic in my drafts that's just them hardcore fucking :( <- that's what i mean by this by the way, i am NOT a freak as hard as that is to believe)

age is important. I won't write anything for minors that comes off as creepy for me, since i am a decent human being and that's gross especially since I'm a young adult, but parenting fics and hcs are my JAM, don't hold back on those btw, i love writing domestic fics, it's so nice to see them heal

boundaries and respect, I won't write i.e, someone aromantic in a romantic relationship, someone who's attracted to another gender that the character isn't ( as in, if the character is lesbian i will not write?? the character?? liking a male?? i have the rights to make any straight character queer though ) or ignoring xyz's preference just for character, etc! It makes me feel weird

I will only write things that I have hands down experience with, I will not screw around with cultures, practices, beliefs, etc that aren't mine/i'm not familiar with, not cause I'm afraid but because I know how disrespectful it can be ( EXCEPT for americans, im sorry americans, i know y'all are chill but. yeah. )

mental and physical illnesses are okay to be requested (will only write ones that I have, for reasons) but sometimes experiences can be hard to write down and may seem off-ish even when I know it through personal things so be patient with that, be patient in general

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ABOUT // INFORMATION :

not gonna share a lot, because i'm slightly emberarrased ab this

I use any pronouns but mainly he/they ( don't use she/her a lot )

silly little guy really can't catch a break, huh

tonetags are encouraged cause I need them

my name's raymond, but you can call me raymond

here's my masterlist and my draftlist btw, i totally meant to post my draftlist. i swear. im not a liar

i can't take this entire sideblog seriously, i mean i can since i am writing 2K sex fics but. it's an experience

guess who my favorite characters are? it's impossible to tell /s

AO3 is goldenboyspence

#i'm sorry americans #like personally.#i know i said i wouldnt yk #but they're set in america #and i cant do anything about it #subjecting my american friend to torture #just to proof read #my fic btw #<- he hates my guts ^_^

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lesbitchka · 6 years

Note

Mogai Hell: age NINE I told my parents I love girls, 13, still love girls, 16 get tumblr, 18 date a guy, don’t want to have sex with him so I went through, bi, bi aro, ace aro, bi ace, pan ace, bi Demi ace, I dump the guy at 20 to realise I really am the lesbian I’ve predicted since I was born

another mhd story for you > heterosexual > bisexual > lesbian > demisexual (after i discovered mogai) > asexual > autochorrisexual > demisexual > aro-ace > demiromantic asexual > homoromantic demisexual (after i fell in love with a girl) > demi-homoromantic homo-autochorrisexual (worst point) > and now i accept that im just a lesbian!

i used to id as pansexual demiromantic bc i wasnt totally against the idea of sex with men i just didnt wanna date them but! turns out im a lesbian and much more comfortable with myself

when I was deep into MOGAI I was told that bi=attraction to your gender and other genders, but not necessarily all genders; ply=attraction to more than one but not all; pan=attraction to all. I identified as ply, saying I was attracted to all genders but men. Bet you’ll never guess what my actual orientation is 🙄 ofc I was identifying with a bunch of ~aro/ace spectrum~ labels first before I could admit that im a Lesbo and when I did come out I lost my mogai “friends”

mhd: straight girl - bi - biromantic homosexual - no labels - lesbian

I feel like it’s a common lesbian experience for lesbians who were confused by mogai to say “I’m pan but demi towards guys” like damn I really was a dumb ass huh anyways I’m lesbiamism and 🔪towards guys

I first ID’d as straight ace > panromantic autochorissexual > polyromantic cupiosexual? > aromantic ace > definitely lesbian but maybe ace. Definitely lesbian tho 👌🏼

MHD !! cis bi girl > cis lesbian > gnc(i know this isn't a gender identity but thats where i put my Dysphoria Feels at the time) cis lesbian > agender polysexual (girls + nb ppl) > agender asexual panromantic > > asexual biromantic demiboy > bisexual trans man (i should clarify that thinking i was a lesbian wasn't a result of mogai stuff and i think there would have been 3 or 4 steps here if i hadn't encountered mogais)

i went thru a HARDCORE mogai hell phase. straight girl > bi girl > pan girl > grey ace pan-lithromantic pangender > akoi-polyromantic asexual pangender > panplatonic biaesthetic akoi-panromantic demigirl > aroace panplatonic demigirl (i was in a qpr 🙃) > aroace bi (yikes) demigirl > bi-ace agender > aroace trans guy > turns out i'm bisexual and genderfluid!

here's my lengthy mogai hell denial story: cis het girl --> cis bi girl --> non-binary bi person --> non-binary biromantic asexual --> non-binary biromantic gray-asexual --> non-binary autochorissexual (jfc) --> bi trans guy --> gay trans guy. i thought i was ace for 2-3 years because i wasn't constantly thinking about sex. now i'm finally comfortable with just being a dude who's attracted to dudes.

#mogai hell denial #h slur #1528 #1529 #1530 #1531 #1532 #1533 #1534 #1535 #1536 #1537 #761 #762 #763 #764 #765 #766 #767 #368 #369 #Anonymous

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andro-boi · 5 years

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I still don’t understand the difference between being bisexual and Pansexual?? I feel like the definitions described on your Instagram defined the same thing? I’m still very confused

Look I don’t blame you, it can be v confusing but also because we have all been taught to believe a certain stereotypes so accepting a whole new different system of knowledge can be just down right fucking confusing. However I really do applaud you for tryna get to the bottom of this confusion for your own education rather than brush it off like most people <3

Okay so what the fuck does it mean to be BISEXUAL

“Bisexual means you’re attracted to people of both genders yeah?”

Not Exactly my friend,

Gender isn’t a binary, meaning that people don’t fall into the categories of “Men” or “Woman” that we were all taught growing up.

Look the oldies got some shit right but they got a lotta things wrong. There is new information being discovered every day. Like they thought homosexuality was a mental illness 50 years ago.

#NonBinary is a word that describes people who don’t exclusively identify as either a woman or a man. #NonBinary people could also identify as Bigender, Genderfluid, or Agender, just to name a few terms. So, in saying that when people say “Both Genders” its a misnomer.

Misnomer: a wrong or inaccurate use of a name or term.

“Yeah well how come men and women always existed but #NonBinary people only existing now huh dad!“

Ha thats where you wrong family. #NonBinary people have been acknoledged by the LGBTQIA Community for many decades. In fact in a 1990 Bisexual Manifesto (Yes I know, A BISEXUAL MANIFESTO in the 1990s) acknoledged that Non Binary people Exist. Also if you look into a lot of cultures of the world you will realise that Non Binary and Trans People have always existed.

“Aight then, are bisexual people only attracted to men and women, and not nonbinary people?”

Nope, not necessarily.

Bisexuality means different things to different people.

To some people, it means attraction to two or more genders, or multiple genders.

To others, it means attraction to people of the same gender and people who are another gender.

Some bisexual people might only be attracted to men and women and not nonbinary people, but that’s not every bisexual person’s experience.

“Okay then what does PANSEXUAL mean?”

The prefix “pan-” means “all.” Similarly, pansexuality means that you’re attracted to people of all genders.

This includes people who don’t identify with any gender (agender).

Many pansexual people describe themselves as being attracted to people based on personality, not gender.

Important Note: pansexual doesn’t mean you’re attracted to all people.

For example, heterosexual men aren’t attracted to all women, and vice versa.

It simply means that they find themselves attracted to people of all sorts of gender categories.

“Lol it sounds like you just said the same thing twice dad - whats the fucking difference tho?“

Bisexual means attracted to multiple genders, and pansexual means attracted to all genders.

These are different because “multiple” isn’t the same thing as “all.”

Let’s say you ask your friends what their favorite colors are.

One friend might say, “Actually, I like more than one color!” Another friend might say, “I like all colors.”

Now, the first friend might like all colors, but they might not. They might not like khaki or beige. Perhaps they like pastels but not dark colors.

This is because “all colors” is, by definition, more than one.

However, “more than one” isn’t technically all.

Some people feel that pansexual falls into the category of bisexual because bisexual is a broad term that means more than one — but it isn’t the same thing, because “all” isn’t the same as “multiple.”

“Why is the Bisexual VS Pansexual Distinction so controversial? “

The controversy around this distinction often stems from a place of misunderstanding and lack of education.

Some people assume that bisexual people are erasing nonbinary people. They assume the word bisexual implies that there are only two genders.

Other people assume that pansexual is a word invented solely because bisexual people are misunderstood and assumed to exclude nonbinary people.

The truth is that both orientations are valid in their own right.

Many bisexual communities do acknowledge nonbinary people — in fact, many nonbinary people identify as bisexual. Additionally, many pansexual people know that the definition of bisexual can include nonbinary people.

Again, bisexuality and pansexuality don’t mean exactly the same thing, and it’s completely valid to identify as either (or both!).

“What if you’re attracted to one gender way more than another? am i still bi or pansexual?“

Yes! You can still be bisexual or pansexual if you find yourself more attracted to one gender than others.

In fact, surveys and studies show that many bisexual and pansexual people have a preference. This doesn’t make your orientation any less valid.

“Can you be attracted to different genders in different ways...“

Yes. You might find yourself sexually attracted to one gender and romantically attracted to another gender. This is called “mixed orientation” or “cross orientation.”

For example, you could be bisexual but homoromantic — meaning you’re sexually attracted to people of multiple genders, but you’re only romantically attracted to people who are the same gender as you.

We been talking about bisexuality and pansexuality — that is, sexual orientations.

However, there are different romantic orientations, including:

Aromantic. You experience little to no romantic attraction to anyone, regardless of gender.

Biromantic. You’re romantically attracted to people of two or more genders.

Panromantic. You’re romantically attracted to people of all genders.

Greyromantic. You experience romantic attraction infrequently.

Demiromantic. You experience romantic attraction infrequently, and when you do it’s only after developing a strong emotional connection to someone.

Heteroromantic. You’re only romantically attracted to people of a different gender to you.

Homoromantic. You’re only romantically attracted to people who are the same gender as you.

Polyromantic. You’re romantically attracted to people of many — not all — genders.

“Does dating someone of a particular gender mean you’re straight?“

Hell to the fucking No. Let’s say a bisexual woman is in a relationship with a man. This doesn’t make her straight. Similarly, if she dates a woman, she doesn’t become a lesbian.

Unfortunately, many people think that bisexual and pansexual people need to “pick a side” — gay or straight. And when bisexual and pansexual people date someone publicly, it’s often assumed that they’re picking a side.

You aren’t defined by your partner’s gender.

The labels we choose to describe our orientation are only determined by ourselves and our experiences with attraction.

“Okay where the does the term #Queer come in?“

“Queer” is a sort of blanket term used to include all people who don’t identify as straight.

While it was previously used as a slur, it has been reclaimed by the LGBTQIA+ community. ( Funny little story, I had a friend of mine call me “Queer Fuck” during high school and ya guessed it, she hella gay now. )

However, some people still feel uncomfortable with the word “queer” because it’s been used as a form of oppression.

It’s totally OK to use it instead of, or in addition to, another term.

Many people use “queer” because they aren’t sure how to describe their orientation, or because their orientation feels fluid and changes over time.

“How do I know which term fits me?“

There’s no test to determine whether you’re bisexual or pansexual (or another orientation entirely).

You can identify as whatever orientation fits you. Of course, figuring out what fits you might be tough.

To help you figure out your sexual orientation, you may ask yourself:

Is there any gender that I don’t ever feel attracted to?

Is there any gender — or group of genders — that I’m not sure if I’m attracted to?

What word feels best?

What community do I feel comfortable with?

Am I romantically attracted to the same people I’m sexually attracted to?

Remember, there isn’t a right or wrong answer. It’s about getting to know yourself better and figuring out what you like and prefer.

It’s also important to remember that it’s OK to identify with multiple terms — as well as change the way you describe your sexual orientation later on.

“Can you identify with one term then switch to another later on“

Yes! Identifying with a particular sexual orientation isn’t a lifelong binding contract. Like we don’t sell your soul to the devil for a membership lmao

You might find that your sexual orientation and your capacity for attraction changes over time, or you might learn of another word that better describes your sexual orientation. Why? Because we’re human and we grow and change with time and just life.

No matter the reason, you’re allowed to change the way you describe your orientation.

“What if neither of these terms feel right for me anymore?..“

That’s OK. Sexual orientation can change over time. That doesn’t mean it isn’t valid.

For example, it’s totally fine to identify as bisexual at one point in time and then as heterosexual later on.

A lot of people assume bisexuality is a “stepping-stone” to homosexuality, but this isn’t true.

Many people identify as bisexual their whole lives. If you do find that your sexuality shifts, don’t feel ashamed because it “fits” into someone else’s misconception of what bisexuality is.

You aren’t perpetuating a myth by being who you are; another person’s misinformed opinion isn’t your burden to carry.

“Okay.. but what if,. neither of these terms have ever felt right for me?“

Oh my sweet angel, There are many ways to identify. Beyond bisexual and pansexual, there are other words to describe your orientation, including:

Asexual. You experience little to no sexual attraction to anyone, regardless of gender.

Greysexual. You experience sexual attraction infrequently.

Demisexual. You experience sexual attraction infrequently, and when you do it’s only after developing a strong emotional connection to someone.

Heterosexual. You’re only sexually attracted to people of a different gender to you.

Homosexual. You’re only sexually attracted to people who are the same gender as you.

Polysexual. You’re sexually attracted to people of many — not all — genders.

This isn’t a comprehensive list of sexual orientations — more and more words are being coined to describe people’s unique experiences of sexual orientation.

Remember, you don’t have to use any word or label to describe your orientation that you don’t want to use.

How you choose to identify is entirely up to you!

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aramaura · 5 years

Text

Pride Month Questionnaire

the following questions can be used both in character and out of character, depending on what you want to answer. these questions are meant to make people familiar with the various shades of love, attraction and identity, feel free to add your own. happy pride 🌈

what is your sexuality? -- Asexual

what do you identify as? -- Genderfluid/Agender.

how long have you been aware of your sexuality/identity? - I have been aware that I wasn't interested in intercourse since 12th grade, in 2008. I was aware that I was non-binary since I was a kid. I hated playing with girly things, wearing flowers, dresses, etc. For the longest time I thought I was probably Trans, but as I got older I realized that while I aesthetically still lean towards the male aesthetic, I do have feminine qualities and likes.

do you have any preferences? - They/Them, Xi/Xis/Xir (for personal use usually).

share a positive memory about coming out! - I remember sitting in Women's Studies in High School when we were reading the Awakeing and talking about the differences between Straight and Gay/Lesbian relationships. And I remember telling the class that I was Asexual, and I was met with mostly acceptance and a bit of confusion. Mainly "Wait, so you're not sexually attracted to men? nor women? Then what ARE you attracted to?" "Nothing... that's literally it." "You mean you never want to have sex?" "Exactly." "How's that any different from being celibate?" "Celibacy is usually until marriage and usually is a choice." "Huh. Cool." Even the teacher looked accepting of it.That was it. Acceptance. No teasing or mocking. I felt pretty good about it.

how do you feel about pride month? - Its pretty exciting! Its good to see how people are able to come together and celebrate their pride.

do you participate in pride related events? any other events? - I have never been able to go to pride before. I would like to.

how do you feel about lgbtqa roles in media? - there needs to be more representation, and less of people trying to stifle it saying that networks are "perpetuating the homosexual agenda".

do you feel pride in who you are? - Hell yeah.

who has been your supportive idols in your self discovery? -

tell us about your first crush? - It was mostly an aesthetic attraction. I appreciated how he looked, and I thought that he had a nice personality. Then I was proven very wrong as his personality was that of a mouldy sponge. That ended that attraction quickly.

what sort of advice to have you lgbtqa teens? - Be proud of who you are. Take time to discover yourself. And don't be afraid to let your identity evolve. Just because you're one thing now doesn't mean that you can't discover that you are something else later on.

have you come out to friends and family? - Yes.

how do you feel about the term “coming out” ? -Well, its an accurate term. Like coming out of a cocoon, a shell of what society expects you to be, and showing who you truly are.

do you believe there is a “closet” to come out of? - maybe not a closet. I mean, you could be metaphorically stuffing your sexuality into a closet to hide it from the world out of fear of how your family/friends might react. Its an accurate term, really, but I prefer a different phrase.

any tips on coming out? - Test the waters. Start with your more accepting family members and friends. Then slowly move on. I'm not good at this. I had a relatively easy time.

what’s your biggest pet peeve when it comes to lgbtqa characterization in media? - I guess lgbtqa characters tend to be overstereotyped. Like, you have a gay character and all of a sudden, that character is all "OMFG FFFFFABULOUS!!!!" Dude. That is a stereotype. Also, Asexual characters are hardly in media. (Props to Bojack for having an Asexual character, btw.)

what’s your favorite parts of lgbtqa characterization in media? - Its becoming more and more visible, and showing less of that stereotype.

what did your teachers say about the lgbtqa community in school? - Hey, props to NPSD. They were pretty damn cool about sexuality. We had safe spaces, and I felt pretty accepted in school. And props to my 12th grade Women's Lit teacher. She was awesome and accepting of my asexuality.

do you practice safe sex with the same sex? - heh. nope. I don't do the sex at all. ;P

what’s an absolute turn off for you in people? - Rotten personalities.

what’s an absolute turn on for you in people? - I dunno man. nothing is a real turn on. but I am aeshtetically attracted to people with broad shoulders and kind eyes.

how do you feel about lgbtqa clubs/apps/websites? - they're great! Its great to have support!

how do you feel about the term “queer” ? -- nothing, really. Its a word.

how does you country view the lgbtqa community? -- Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. What with that orange cheeto man in office?

favorite lgbtqa actor/actress? - Ian McKellen, George Takei

any tips for heterosexual people on how to handle lgbtqa events/news? -- Just be supportive and accepting.

what’s the most annoying question you have ever gotten? -- If you're asexual, then how are you going to do your god given duty to "go forth and multiply" you freak?

how do you feel about receiving questions about your sexuality/identity? -- I'm open to it.

what is your romantic affiliation? -- I believe I'm Aromantic. However, who's to say that might not change? Perhaps I'm Demi-romantic and can only fall in love with someone I have an emotional bond with? No one knows.

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