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rrafecameronsslut · 2 days

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LISTENN HEAR ME OUT!! So all of the imagines where reader/oc come back from the capitol they are like up and ready to roll but can you write something where reader comes back from the capitol and doesnt wake up for a few days?? finnick is there when she wakes up?? fluff at its finest 🤌 ps i will love you forever!! also its been in the back of my mind for forever

your heard, immediately as soon as I got a chance I wrote this little fluff for you, if you want a part two just request again. love your idea<3

𓂃𓂃𓂃𓊝 ࿐𓂃𓂃𓂃 ☀︎ 𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆝⋆.˚ 𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆞 𓆉𓆝𓇼𓆟 𖦹°‧𓆝𓆡𓆜

FINDING EACHOTHER (again)

a/n: ALSO. I AM SO SORRY IF ITS TERRIBLE. I literally just read the first half of mockingjay. (and sorry if it's not what you meant, just request again if this isn't what you meant, but I think you mean like reader wakes up in district thirteen)

warnings: fluff, mentions of passing out (don't know if it's considered passing out, but there's your warning.)

┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ˚★⋆｡˚ ⋆ ┊ ┊ ┊ ⋆ ┊ ┊ ★⋆ ┊ ◦ ★⋆ ┊ . ˚ ˚★

It was all a blur, a haze. The last thing you remembered was the Quarter Quell. Being spilt up, waking up in the Capitol, slipping in and out of weekly sleeps, it was all too much to bare.

Well it doesn't matter anymore, your in district thirteen now, sleeping. You can make out conversations from Haymitch and nurses, or Finnick begging Haymitch not to give up on you, that your body needed 'rest', which wasn’t a lie, at that.

It was a whole week—a week. You were asleep, nothing new right? Except as your eyes peeled open you saw Finnick, that was new. Definitely new. Your first thought was scratched out as Finnick nearly jumped out of his seat, "y/n, y/n-" he grabbed your hand, intertwining it with his. "I'm so sorry, I couldn't protect you from the Capitol, in the arena, even."

"Finn-" you said softly, you voice cracking "I missed you, and no- it's fine, you tried your best." You laced your fingers over his knuckles, refusing to let go, scared if you would let go you would wake up, and this would've just been a dream.

He forced a small smile, "At least I begged Haymitch not to give up, eh?" Finnick pressed his lips against your forehead "Should I go get you your nurse or no?" The monitors around you were steadily beeping, Finnick's voice was as smooth as honey, soothing your nerves.

The urge to rip your IV out to jump into his arms were so surreal. “No. Just you.” You whispered, gripping his hand tighter. “Don’t let go, promise?” You blurted out, leaning towards him.

“Promise, never again.” Finnick pressed his forehead against yours, noses touching, the urge to kiss, breaths hitching, “I love you.”

“Me too.” You whispered back, releasing a breath you didn’t know you were holding, you were safe, with Finnick—even though you didn’t know where you where yet.

#finnick odair #finnick #finnick thg #thg finnick #mockingjay #finnick fluff #finnick odair fluff #finnick odair x reader #finnick x you #thg #the hunger games

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sturniologals · 1 day

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Make it up to you -m.s

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆ ☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆ ☆

Dom!Matt x fem!reader

in which~ y/n had a crush on Matt but his friends/football teammates found out and teased you about it, he joined in on the teasing to hide the fact that he has feelings for you but six months later, you’re desperate for a ride to school and Matt is your only option.

warnings~ p in v/ unprotected (don’t be silly,wrap up your willy)/ use of baby, sweetheart, y/n, praise kink, cursing

───⋆⋅☆⋅⋆───

I stretched my limbs as I tried to peel my eyes open from my sleepy state. "y/n! Hurry up!" My mom shouted at me, afraid id miss the bus.

"Frickity frickity Frick" I mumbled to myself as I looked over at my phone and saw the time reading 7:15, my bus runs in literally like 7 minutes, theres no way I was gonna make it. I opened up my contacts and called and texted at least five of my friends in hope that I could get a ride from one of them but I failed.

I clicked on my last contact I was going to try and started to call my friend Nick.

She answered and her soft voice spoke "Hey y/n!"

"Hey Nick! Is there any possible way that you could give me a ride to school today?" She hummed to herself as she thought about it.

"im sorry girl, Matt took my car today. He has some thing after school but I can call him. He should be able to pick you up!" He chimes.

"No no no, id rather walk. Thank you tho." I say before we bid our goodbyes and hang up.

I meant that, i really would rather walk. Matthew sturniolo has been my biggest enemy since last year, when I first started high school and became friends with Nick. I had an obvious crush on matt even though he was a bit older. His friends found out because matt overheard me talking to Nick about it one time and his friends started to tease me about it and eventually matt joined in and ever since then, they make jokes and poke fun at me anytime I see them.

"y/n! Why are you still in your fucking pajamas?" My mom says angrily from my door.

"Mom its okay, matt is gonna give me a ride!" I spurt out quickly, just not wanting to get into an argument with her.

“Matt? oh! It’s been forever since you guys have hung out.” My mom says, her mood quickly changing to a more joyous one. I roll my eyes at her words and she tells me she loves me before she leaves out for work.

I stand up and put on a pair of black jeans and a dark blue body suit that accentuates my body perfectly. I finish straightening my hair, my luscious blonde locks flowing perfectly down my shoulders. I sit down at my vanity and apply a few makeup products, really just mascara, and a bit of highlighter. Mid way through my routine, i remember i haven’t called Matt yet. My hands start to tremble a bit as i scroll through my contacts in search of his name.

I reluctantly click the call button under his name and the ringing of my phone makes me shudder. After just two rings, he picks up.

“Y/n?” His deep voice grumble from the speakers on my phone.

“Hi Matt! Can you give me a ride to school?” I say peppily, not wanting him to give me any shit.

“I’ll be there in five.” He says before hanging up.

well, that was easy. i think to myself before spritzing myself with some perfume and slipping on my shoes. I grab my bag and walk through my house.

I get to the front door and see trey pulling in.

perfect timing.

The sight of Matts truck parked in my driveway makes me nervous. I push the nervousness down, pulling all of the courage i have out of me and I start walking down my driveway.

Once i step out of my door, he immediately steps out of his truck and walks to the passenger side and opens the door up. He stands leaning on the door, a small smile on his face.

why is he being so fucking nice?

“Hi y/n.” He says in a seductive voice while his eyes trail over my body. The way he’s looking at me sends a heat straight to my core but i try my best to ignore it. I shoot Matt a side eye and a nod of my head as i step up into his truck. He places his hand on my lower back for support as i climb into his vehicle which has me crossing my legs in the passenger seat. Matt looks at me with a hungry look in his eyes as he shuts the door for me and walks over to the driver side.

He climbs into the seat and takes a deep breath in before turning the key over.

“Thanks for picking me up.” I say in the most nonchalant way that i can.

“Yeah, i mean- you haven’t talked to me in almost 6 months so i was surprised you’d wanted me to.” Matt says while looking at me, our eye contact holding strong.

“I didn’t have any other choice.” I say with a shrug of my shoulders and i can see the pain flash in his eyes as i finish my sentence off and i immediately feel bad.

“No- I didn’t mean-“ I start to correct myself but he cuts me off.

“I get it y/n. I really do- don’t apologize sweetheart. I’ve been an asshole to you for so long and i let my friends make jokes and i’m just- i’m so fucking sorry. I was a coward because you made me- feel things.” Matt spurts out, his confession surprising me but making my heart skip a beat and my pussy convulse at the name he called me.

“Matt-“ I start to speak but he cuts me off yet again.

“Can you come to my football game tonight?” He asks impatiently as he starts to pull out of my driveway.

“Matt, you know i hate going to school functions.”

“Please” He says quickly.

“Okay, i’ll be there.” I say reluctantly. I don’t even really know why he wants me there but it seems important so i agree.

The rest of the ride is silent, just Matt glancing at me every few minutes and at some point his large hands made their way to my knee, slowly trailing up my thigh as i squirmed around in my seat, Matt glancing at my neediness but his hand never moved to my heat.

“Here you go sweetheart.” Matt says as we pull up next to the busy school entrance.

“Aren’t you coming?” I ask him.

“I’ll be here later.” He says with a small smile as he unbuckles my seat belt for me and walks around to open my door. His truck is raised high off of the ground but Matt is so tall that his head is still up to my level when he’s standing on the ground in-front of me. He puts his hands around my waist and picks me up out of his truck. I giggle as he sits me down on the ground. He chuckles and tells me he’ll see me later.

As i walk into school, all that’s going through my head is Matt.

the things he said to me were definitely more than ‘friendly’

why is he being so nice?

is this another joke?

the way his hands were all over me tho…

sweetheart?

why does he want me at his game tonight?

i made him feel things?

what things?

i spend the rest of my school day and the whole ride home and the whole time i’m getting ready for the football game also thinking about Matt. The thoughts about him in my head are inevitably erotic and i genuinely can’t help it.

My mom drops me off at the game and i pull at the tight shorts on my legs as i hop out of the car. I walk up into the bleachers and i find a seat that gives me a perfect view of the field. Matt comes out of now where and runs up to the fence that separates us.

“c’mere!” he says loudly, i can see his friends behind him starting to laugh and i get nervous and all of memories of them poking fun at me make me sick and i want to run out of there.

“y/n baby, i said to come here.” Matt demands in a soothing yet firm voice that makes me feel safe. His friends behind him starts staring and looking confused. I am too but i listen to try and walk over to stand over the fence. His eye black is starting to smudge and his hair is tousled perfectly and i’m so close that i can smell his manly musk.

As soon as i’m standing slightly over Matt, he pulls his hands up to my head and pulls me down to him and immediately shoves his lips onto mine. The feeling of his mouth moving over mine is something i’ve wanted to feel for so fucking long. I groan into his mouth as his tongue slips into mine and i can taste the saltiness of his mouth and i’m

craving more. I audibly groan when he pulls away, his lips swollen and pink as he runs back to the field. His friends just staring at him angrily and confused as he flips them off and walks down the field with a smile on his face.

what the fuck just happened?

and why is his whole football team staring at me?

Matt yells at his friends from across the field.

“hey! shitheads! stop staring at my girl and get your asses down here.”

I get butterflies at him calling me ‘his girl’ but then i remember the months of teasing he let his friends do to me and i wipe the smile off of my face quickly. Maybe i should let myself enjoy this tho?

Throughout the whole game, my internal monologue argues with itself. By the end of the game, i decide i want to give him a chance. I believe what he told me. Matt sweaty figure runs up to the fence at the end of the game, they won of course. I’m clapping and smiling at Matt, his eyes looking directly into mine. He puts his arms out over the fence and motions for me to walk over. I do so and he puts his hands on my waist and picks me up over the fence and pulls me onto the field. I smile up at him and he immediately kisses me again.

His friends and even his coach “oooo”-ing at us as he gives me a desperate yet gentle kiss.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you ever since you showed up to my house with your fucking sparkly pink jump rope for cheer practice almost two years ago.” he whispers into my ear as he pulls away. My face goes red with embarrassment.

“You played good.” I say with a proud smile.

He flashes his white teeth at me before one of his friends, jacob, comes up behind Matt. i sigh and immediately get nervous because jacob was one of the main people who teased me. Matt looks over at jacob with sharp eyes, as if he’s warning him to not say anything to me. Jacob just smiles at me. “I’m sorry y/n, i was a dick to you and owen for a long time.”

I nod with a small thin lipped smile.

“you wanna get out of here sweetheart?” owen says to me. I nod my head and he smiles at me as he takes my hand and walks us out of the stadium.

as we walk through the busy parking lot, murmurs from people in our small town are heard.

“ew he’s like- old as fuck.”

“didn’t he literally bully her?”

i block out the noise, Matt squeezing my hand as a sign of comfort.

We get into his truck and i immediately look over at him. “Matt. why?”

he looks at me confusedly. “why what?”

“why did you want me to come tonight?” i ask timidly. He laughs out loud and i grow confused.

“you’re oblivious. I wanted you here tonight so i could kiss you in front of all of the assholes who used to give you shit.” he says with a genuine smile of happiness as he rubs his hand up and down my leg.

“Oh.” I say quietly as it clicks in my head. “Oh!” i say once i get it.

“cmon sweetheart it’s late. i’ll get you home.” Matt says as he reaches over to buckle my seatbelt for me, his long fingers grazing over my chest. Butterflies erupt in my stomach and heat grows between my legs as owen starts his truck and pulls out of the parking lot. His hand is resting on my thigh and quiet music plays, my window cracked slightly allowing some of the cold friday night breeze to flow through the cab of his truck. Every smidge of cold air that hits my skin makes me shudder. My body is extremely sensitive to the touch right now. I look over at owen and his dark eyes are trained on his hand that’s resting on my leg. “you’re so beautiful y/n.” Matt says in a low, seductive voice as his thumb draws circles on my inner thigh.

“pull over.” I say nervously, trying to muster up all of the courage that i have. Matt smirks, knowing what i want as he pulls over by an empty desolate park by some trees that offer a good enough coverage. As soon as he shifts into park, i immediately swing my legs over his lap so i’m straddling. My lips are on his in a hot, sweaty and passionate kiss. The smell of sweat and grass still on Matt makes me impossibly needier.

All of a sudden- Matt pulls my face back.

“Patience baby.” Matt says with an attractive chuckle.

“you’re not gonna fucking tease me all day and then tell me to have patience Matt.” i say firmly as i slowly start to rock my hips back and forth on him, making him groan out.

“oh- don’t- god, y/n.” he says as he throws his head back and shuts his eyes in pleasure as his eyebrows knit together.

“Nuh uh, you owe me six months worth of apologies. You’re gonna be the one making me feel good, yeah?” i say deviously as i cease my movements. Matt eyes open up and meet mine, a smile playing across his features as he laughs and nods his head yes.

“i guess you’re right about that one sweetheart.” he says as he quickly puts a hand on my back and turns me so my back is against the passenger door of his truck as he pulls my ankles up to his shoulders. I groan out as i arch my back needily.

“calm down pretty girl. let me take care of you.” he says softly as he pulls my shorts down my hips. His eyes clench shut together for a second. “you’re so perfect.” he praises as he starts to kiss up my thighs.

“Matt…” i moan out as he gets closer to my core.

he starts to kiss over my clothed cunt before slowly pulling my panties down.

“you’re so soaked. all because of me?” he speaks seductively as i bring my fingers up to his hair and pull his head closer to my pussy impatiently. He laughs out loud before licking a stripe up me which pulls a loud moan out of me. His tongue moves against me quickly and skillfully, pulling more and more noises from me.

“Oh you’re doing so good for me sweetheart.” He says against my cunt before ducking on my bundle of nerves.

“Matt- i’m gonna-“ i pant out, unable to form a coherent sentence.

“Finish in my mouth, let me taste you.” he says, which sends me over the edge, screaming his name as his head gets squeezed between my clenching thighs.

I pant out as i come down from my high as owen continues to lick me clean like a starved man.

“good?” he asks with an egotistical expression on his face.

“i’ve had better.” i say sarcastically with a shrug.

“Yeah i bet.” he says as he pulls my shorts back up my legs for me.

I sit up straight and fix my hair in his mirror before i buckle my seat belt and Matt starts to drive again.

“y/n” Matts deep voice speaks out, diverting my attention to him.

“hm?” I hum out.

“I love you.” he says with a small nervous smile on his face. My stomach immediately erupts in butterflies and a smile forms on my face.

“I love you too.” I say as i intertwine my fingers with his.

#sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo #sturniolo smut #sturniolos #chris sturniolo fanfic

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flyingfabio · 3 days

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le mans thoughts dump!!!

sorry it’s gonna be a picture-less dump because i wasn’t prepared and i only had only my phone with shitty camera quality… also this going to be a mess. first general remarks and then a fabio special part of course… under a read more because i think it’s gonna be longgg

general remarks about the event

well not a surprise but le mans is CRAZY. so many bikes so many people and the atmosphere… you don’t need beer or anything else to feel PUMPED there

the weather was GREAT and i felt it made the experience so enjoyable. i wore long jeans and big tshirts and applied sunscreen and spent time in the grandstands away from the sun and yet my face is red. i have a sunburn on my chin. MY CHIN.

i didn’t feel unsafe or witness anything gross during my time there. important to mention that i was with my brother and didn’t camp on site so the experience can definitely be different for others. there ARE overly drunk people at the circuit and some entitled people smoking weed with families with kids nearby…

as for the camping sites you could see them from the circuit and HEAR them from afar and it is WILD. never in my life i think i would be capable to camp there lmao

so many things to do at the venue: the village, fanzones, a stunt show, fireworks… you can feel how this gp is organized as a whole experience for the fans

did i mention a lot of people?

obviously some things to improve especially the management of the entrances/exit points of the circuit but with so many people at a venue that is not that big i can understand the struggle. maybe they need to think about implementing a limit for the attendance at some point

i had grandstands tickets and it was really enjoyable to have a place with shade to sit down at any moment though i LOVED going to sit on the grass trackside to watch the bikes, especially with the warm weather. sad that we only had time to watch from only a few places at the last turns of the circuit (raccordement, “s” bleus, chemin aux boeufs). would have loved to sit at garage vert for example.. we only did this on friday and saturday because we thought sunday would be too crowded. people literally come at 6-7 am to get the best spots!

the NOISE. thank god i brought my earplugs with noise reduction. the bikes are very loud on their own obviously, but if you are trackside you can watch without ear protection easily. but in the grandstands on the straight? HELL NO! i think it’s very special to le mans where the place is acting like a “soundbox”, amplifying the sound

where we sat in the grandstand we could see the canal+ booth from the other side of the straight. at some point i was like wait a min… isn’t that maverick and rivola out there? and i was right, my bro was shocked i could recognize them from their backs and so far away… also guessed raul, miguel and lin jarvis. maybe i’m too deep in the motogp hole? also recognized the back of a fabio cut-out that people had installed at the bottom of our grandstand but this is a given i guess

idk where to put that but i saw pecco’s mascot so many times i’m starting to think there are actually two of them

also the speaker at the circuit was shit. he flopped so many times

the races

overall good races!

moto3 was good, especially because they were close and there were overtakes for the win at the end

moto2 was meh, some good battles in the pack but the race was over after lap one... probably was the only one looking for tony at every lap and cheering for him. rude speakers saying how he was fighting for the championship last year and how he is struggling this year. bitch it's not his fault that speedups are suddenly rocketships 😭

motogp sprint… it’s better that i don’t talk about it. thank you acosta for the overtaking crumbs

motogp race!! i thought it would be a repeat of the sprint, but it turned out to be such a good battle at the front! the crowd went NUTS when martin and then marc overtook pecco. obviously it’s so nice to get battles like these at the front for the win, but this doesn’t erase the fact that it’s still ducati only. and for me motogp CAN'T be at its best unless it’s different brands fighting it out

you know my distaste for the sprints, but i have to admit it adds something to the experience at the track, especially for casual fans like my brother. for me i really enjoyed friday, seeing the different bikes go around the track and observing the different riding styles. my brother much more enjoyed saturday and sunday when there was more “at stake”. this sprint was shit though

my grandstand was… something lmao. a mix of marc truthers and booers. pecco haters who had beef with the pecco grandstand next to us lmao. pecco grandstand started to cheer for pecco after people clapped when the speaker announced martin as the poleman… you can imagine they weren’t as loud after the race lmao 😭

the japanese bikes… it’s so depressing to see irl you have no idea. this weekend basically all of them (except fabio) were hanging out at the end of grid with augusto fernandez...

the marini case is even worse man. it’s so bad that i think i had left my grandstand before he even crossed the finish line on sunday and i’m not even kidding (many people were leaving just after the winner arrived to try to get out of the circuit quickly)

pedro acosta was probably the most applauded after the frenchies and marc

that jorge martin guy is REAL fast on a ducati i’m afraid

marc marquez is a showman

weird personal observation but i was less stressed before the race start than i am when i’m watching on tv

FABIOOOOOOOOO

as i said last year, he really is his people’s DARLING

but first about his performance this weekend. INSANE. straight to q2 with an insane lap. with fellow fabio truther lady sat next to me we held our breath until the very end of the session… then during q2 i remember thinking well let’s see fabio qualify p12 now and then when he pushed that tractor and it got him to p6 at some point? my jaw was on the floor and everyone around cheered

the sunday race… man. i felt it IN MY BONES that fabio would crash at some point. i knew it when he was just in front of aleix and he was manhandling that bike in every direction just to stay in front. then i saw that he had managed to make a small gap to aleix and i thought “he wants too much and he’s overriding it too much…” next when the yellow flag alert appeared i knew…

it was clear that he wanted to give his everything this whole weekend, no matter how shit the bike was. it was no coincidence that the cross necklace was back this weekend…

even my brother who is the casual of casuals noticed the difference of riding style. said that it was obvious how much fabio was fighting the bike compared to others

the special livery. my god it was SO beautiful on camera and irl… the bike looked so good on the track and fabio looked radiant in those leathers. i tried the special le mans cap but it was a flat brim which i don’t like very much and it looked ugly on me so i bought this baby instead

i was pleasantly surprised not to hear any fabio slander during the entire weekend. when you look at the comment from moto french “fans” on facebook it’s always full of hate (he only thinks about money, he is too “feminine” or whatever bullshit, homophobic shit etc.) even with his special livery (shit like omg can you believe he is a MAN and likes to wear PINK???) i heard nothing. probably for the best or i was ready to throw hands

rins didn’t come with fabio on stage in fanzone for the “meeting with riders” event and it’s understandable poor guy probably wouldn’t have had any question for him

it’s crazy how fabio’s voice sounds different to me irl. at some point i thought he sounded like mbappé 😭

when asked who was his favorite rider (the question didn’t mention past or present, but then the host said well let’s go from the current riders) fabio answered marc marquez is a legend of the sport. also joked don’t worry valentino fans lmao

got asked if he thinks there are too many ducatis on the grid. you can imagine the reaction of the crowd lol. then said that “yamaha and myself are working hard to have two more yamahas on the grid… and two less ducatis smirks”

someone asked him the obvious question of why he stayed at yamaha. answered how he understands why people don’t understand his choice right now, but that they will in the coming few weeks and right there i believed him. this man could sell me the moon

hardcore fans who take this rare opportunity to ask fabio to sign their fabio related tattoo will never fail to make me cringe but what’s way worse is the man who thought himself entitled to ask fabio about his private life in front of everyone and how “we never see the many women who are after him” posted there (do you get the gross implication there?) anyways. the cunt got booed and fabio got applauded when he answered that he has the right to keep some parts of his life private while he already shares many things with the fans

maybe i will conclude on this but going there you understand why yamaha had to do everything to keep fabio. going beyond the performance element which is obvious, fabio’s marketing power is insane. when fans were asked about their favorite brand, yamaha got the most applause. i didn’t count but i think the yamaha/fabio merch was the most worn among fans (maybe alongside with vr46 lol). and like yeah we’re in france so obviously it’s more visible but having managed to keep the face of their brand is essential in rough times like these. take honda for example, it’s like they weren’t even there this weekend, even with zarco riding one…

probably forgot many things but i think that’s enough lol. i’m already missing it (thank god i took this day off to recover) and i will certainly go again in the future!! (maybe not every year because it’s A LOT though)

#motogp #fabio quartararo #elie at le mans #elie.txt #tagging fabio because there is a strong focus on him obvs #then going back to work tomorrow... what if i kms

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sortasirius · 1 day

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"Ghost of a Second Chance" and the Haunting of Eddie Diaz

Okay I finally have some semblance of cohesive thoughts on this episode, so here goes.

Long ass post below:

First of all, the stalker/kidnapping situation was, in fact, harrowing. 911 always knows how to pull off a good twist, I had no inkling that she HADN'T been kidnapped by her husband until Athena figured it out.

The theme of this whole post is, essentially, that I love the way 911 handles past trauma. It's messy and difficult and often not a linear path to healing. We see that with Maddie and with Eddie in this episode in particular, with foreshadowing for Bobby as well.

Sorry I just love seeing them work a call, like these are my emotional support firefighters <3

I'm also loving this arc with Hen and Karen, they're such good parents and are fighting so hard for Mara. And to have Denny be the one she talks to first? To have him be the one that she opens up to? They've raised him so so so well.

Chris is the best and I love him.

And so...Eddie.

"Not too late. We can turn around and leave her now."

Yeah alright, throwaway line meant to be a joke. Sure. But we really don't know Marisol like that. We haven't spent enough time with her to know that he doesn't actually feel this way. Hell, the last time we had a scene with her he was asking her to move out and grinning from ear to ear when she agreed. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to understand that...he's just not that into her.

And here we are, with Chris and Marisol walking ahead of him, and Eddie looking into a store to see Shannon's literal doppleganger folding some shirts.

Immediately, we get scenes of them together. Laughing, kissing, looking at one another, but there are a few things that I find interesting here, first and foremost how these shots are colored.

They're washed out, not fully black and white, but sort of greyscale. I saw someone else talk about how they're colored this way because Eddie doesn't remember them clearly anymore, and I have latched onto this, it makes perfect sense.

I do think part of him is terrified of losing these memories, clinging to them in a way, and seeing this woman in the store sort of brought them all to the surface, giving him something to almost cling to.

"You okay? You look like you've seen a ghost."

Yeah haha, just saw the double of my dead wife in the store, no biggie.

I have to laugh.

When Maddie realizes that Catherine never told her that she was with her husband, you can really tell that this call is dragging up a lot for her, which goes back to my point on how well this show portrays non-linear healing. Even though she left Doug in the woods and moved on with her life, even though she has Jee and fought her PPD and won, even though she's married to Chimney, a part of her will always look over her shoulder expecting to see him there. She's come such a long way, but trauma like that doesn't just go away, it's something that she'll battle forever.

I'm also loving the look into the broken foster system for Hen and Karen. They want to do right by Mara, but how can they when they're not given all the information, when they weren't told about Tyson because Deirdre wasn't allowed to tell them?

I loved Amir's scene with Maddie and I'm DEPRESSED that he's going to try and kill the love of my life Bobby.

Eddie just LURKING outside this store to see mirror Shannon...boy...

Sorry but the "do you trust me?" YOU'RE SELLING HIM A CANDLE GIRL HE DOESN'T KNOW YOU.

"Well then you have no reason not to trust me." Spoken like a true serial killer lmfao.

Unfortunately Eddie Diaz is in the depths of delusion and this corny line worked on him.

You have to admit it is so fucking funny that he's on the brink of cheating with a sales associate trying to sell him an ugly ass keychain who looks like his dead wife who asked him for a divorce approximately 37 seconds before she died. Like that is peak comedy and I won't pretend otherwise.

"It's me, your husband?" Chim I know you say this to Maddie 400 times a day and I love you for it.

"Tell me about the woman in the passenger seat of that car."

He's so open with her, so unafraid to see her as she is, the good and the scary, and he loves her anyway, just as she loves him. Sorry I'm just emo about them.

I genuinely could not tell the difference between blonde Shannon and bangs Shannon. I had a meltdown through that entire scene thinking that he was fucking Kim. But it's fine because he was just fantasizing about fucking his dead wife while carrying a conversation with his girlfriend.

Eddie Diaz let me study you.

I find this idea so fascinating, the way he’s clearly looking at their relationship with rose colored glasses, how he remembers the positives only, not the fights, not the arguments, not the fact that he ran away from her twice when he enlisted in the army. He only remembers the good sex, the smiles, the laughter, even though that was a tiny part of their relationship, nearly negligible at times.

This isn’t the first time Eddie’s done this either, he’s talked before about how their relationship was “magic” when it definitely wasn’t.

Overall, I find this a really interesting look into grief, into how we remember the best parts of people we loved, how we can be so willing to forget the things that didn’t work, the anger and the fights.

Eddie has never really dealt with Shannon's death, he’s pushed it to the side for Chris, keeps going even when he feels like he’s going to break apart. And now it seems like it's finally caught up with him, like meeting Kim tore it all open again, and he's haunted by Shannon again, by his guilt for how it ended and what he wished he had done differently.

OBSESSED with Buck tackling this guy like yes himbo king use those football skills.

AND Dad reflexes Chim I truly am living.

I feel like Vincent has no idea that she brought Tyson to see Mara, and I feel like that will come back into play later.

Domestic Buddie and Chris scene <3

Look not to be a total shill for Buddie (who am I kidding we all know what I am) but there's something so...weirdly intimate about Eddie just knowing their pizza order. And it's their order, not just Buck's, like Eddie would be joining them if he wasn't meeting "Marisol."

They are seriously family shaped and I love them.

Jee and Chim and Maddie GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

Now, for the elephant in the room: Kim and Eddie going on a date behind Marisol (and Buck’s) back. Look, I know I’m in the vast, vast minority here, but I don’t hate a cheating arc in fiction. It happens in life, more often than most people want to think about, and it makes for an interesting storyline. But at this point, Eddie hasn’t really cheated (even thought I was CONVINCED he had with that flashback lmao). He’s toeing a dangerous line, yeah, but having dinner with Kim isn’t inherently cheating, even though he is lying to Buck and his real actual girlfriend.

It’s fascinating to see him be okay with this but his “catholic guilt” stands in the way of him having sex with his girlfriend because she was a nun once. I think him seeing Kim like this really hammers home the point that he doesn’t even really like Marisol. He’s certainly not committed to her in any meaningful way, or he wouldn’t be entertaining Kim.

And let’s not forget, he’s lying to Kim too! He told her he was single and he’s not!

Kim isn’t Shannon, she will never be able to fill that void that Eddie is still desperately searching to fill, because no one can fill that void, not even Shannon.

The theme of the episode is, in its way, stalking. The overall plotline of Kyle stalking and kidnapping women, Eddie sort of following Kim around, even Karen making that offhanded comment that she felt like a stalker. But it feels like Eddie's guilt and unprocessed grief over his relationship with Shannon is stalking him in a way. He believes that their relationship was perfect, that if he could just find the right woman, everything would be fixed, he wouldn't have to grieve her anymore. But that's just not how things work, and I don't believe that there is any woman, not even Shannon herself, that could fit on the pedestal that Eddie has created for her.

The way that Shannon has kind of haunted Eddie's narrative from the moment she died, how she looms over every relationship he has... he's always chasing her memory, but not her true memory, he's chasing the memory that he's creating for himself. The beautiful one where they never fought, he never ran, she never left. But that memory doesn't exist, and it never has.

Eddie is looking for something that he’ll never be able to find. He’s looking for a woman that can be the mother that Shannon was to Chris, but with a partnership that doesn’t make him want to run away…or panic…or cheat.

Where is he going to find that? I think we all know he’s already found it, just not with a woman.

I’ll be so interested to see what this turns into. I love the idea that Buck or one of the others meets Kim and she looks nothing like Shannon to them, because it would be so unsettling for everyone to basically be like “what are you seeing in this random woman that makes you think of your dead wife?” What’s the fallout going to be? Eddie is obviously not well, he’s spiraling and will likely hide it from everyone, just like he tried to hide his struggles with PTSD from everyone as well.

He’s such a fascinating character, and I think the way the writers are bringing up this catholic guilt storyline now could be really compelling if it leads to a larger realization. Marisol is a red herring, we don’t even care enough about her to learn her last name, but she’s a catalyst for Eddie’s guilt at being with someone that brings up his feelings about religion, about what’s “right” and “wrong." And I feel like this could lead to a larger realization.

Maybe even about the man who is more of his partner and parent to his son than any of his girlfriends have been.

#spoilers #my meta #lilly liveblogs 911 #911 abc #911 7x07 #911 #buddie #eddie diaz

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