#the bank fucked up my name on my debit card twice

[areyoudoingthis]

I'm almost done with my transition paperwork. it's been nearly a year since i started. we live in an evil bureaucratic hellscape

#I've had to do some stuff thrice because apparently people either can't program or use computers properly #the actual birth certificate and id took a couple of months #everything else took forever #the bank fucked up my name on my debit card twice #they made up a whole new middle name and put it on everything #i had to complain like 5 times about that one cause it kept showing up anywhere #my uni made me wait three months to figure out how to comply with the nonbinary ids on their degrees and then harassed me for two weeks #about a picture #my name's still showing up wrong in parts of the system they use at work #because some people can't read i guess #i gotta send an email about that actually #i even had to update my name at the supermarket which i hadn't even added to the list when i started #i was just grocery shopping one day and realized the cashier was calling me by the wrong name #i think all that's left now are the utilities #and waiting for everything else to be done #like my degree needs to be signed by the usual 6838282 people now #but i can see the finish line #it was all worth it btw i love seeing my name on everything #i even had to turn in my old degree at my uni it felt like a sendoff #I'll see if i can save up and invite my friends over to celebrate #alex txt

[catsi]

twice now, i have been called by scammers pretending to be bankers telling me i'd been scammed by someone else, and that they, the scammer/banker, would cancel the fraudulent transactions made in my name as soon as i gave them a bit of information to confirm my identity.

the second guy called me from my local bank branch's number and told me "someone in another city is attempting to make purchases with your debit card information" and after i expressed obvious distress he told me "don't worry, this is what i'm here for. we're going to get your cards/accounts cancelled/closed and then we'll all i need you to do is verify the 6-digit code that i've sent to your phone"

that 6-digit code was the code to reset my online banking password 🙃 which i didn't realize at the time. he then got into my online banking account and e-transferred himself $2,800. my bank reclaimed the money but i had to close my bank accounts, then open new bank accounts, cancel my debit and credit cards, get new debit and credit cards, alert two credit unions that i was a victim of fraud, change all my fucking passwords, etc etc

sorry if this shit is obvious to other people but it was not to me so:

if someone calls you, claiming to be from your bank telling you that there are suspicious charges on your account, hang up on them and call the number on the back of your debit card. worst case scenario, you hung up on someone and called a different person back but at least now you know you're talking to someone from the bank. best case scenario, you just hung up on a scammer and are already on the line with someone to report it.

keep your head on a fucking swivel out there

[thegeminisage]

super fun experience i just had: my shiny new debit card did not work at the grocery store on mother’s day, so today i called the number to get my pin reset even though i KNOW i used the right one.

unfortunately for me, and what i did not know, is that i would have to answer the security questions i made up when i created this bank account. THAT I THOUGHT WERE JUST FOR RESETTING MY PASSWORD. THAT I DID NOT THINK ANYONE WOULD EVER SEE BUT ME. AND I NEEDED REALLY OBSCURE SHIT THAT SOME HACKER WOULDN’T KNOW. anyway the person on the phone had to read them to me. out loud.

and the first one was fine it was like mother’s maiden name or whatever. but the second one. the second one. “favorite spn episode (numbers only)”

she actually read it like “es pee en” and i didn’t HEAR HER because her mic volume was low and i can’t fucking interpret speech on the phone so not only did she read it out loud she read it out loud twice.

and the cherry on the cake is that the automated system they transferred me to didn’t :) work :) 

which means that eventually 

i am going to have to call back

and get read

those questions

again.

#AAAAAAAA #same energy as when my mom was trying to pick which channels she wanted in our new cable package #and asked me if that show i really really liked with the car and the angels came on TNT #fuck! #personal #liz watches spn

[strawberrysoup]

Let’s Review || Chapter 4

Peter Parker knew that his big sister would do anything for him to be safe and happy. She’d given up everything for him twice over already and would do it again in a heartbeat. And that’s why, when the criminal mastermind Tony Stark started inextricably following him around, he didn’t say a word. Because he knew without a doubt Penny would do whatever she had to if it meant keeping Peter safe. He had to protect her, just like she always protected him. He never considered what would happen if Stark decided both Parker siblings were worth taking. Never considered who else in Stark’s inner circle would agree. He just wanted to protect her and yet somehow, they both ended up with needles in their necks.

relationship: Steve Rogers/Original Female Character/Bucky Barnes, background Peter Parker/Tony Stark rating: Explicit warnings: Dark Steve Rogers, Dark Bucky Barnes, Dark Tony Stark, Dark Avengers, kidnapping, non-con/dub-con elements, underage Peter Parker, emotional and psychological abuse, very dark

When she was younger, Penny could remember her mother blaming little problems around the house on trolls. She said they were little gremlin like creatures that crept around in the dark and sabotaged things just enough to be inconvenient. Whenever Penny forgot something stupid, or worse, something important, she blamed the trolls. Forgetting her purse? The trolls. Forgetting to turn off the lights when she left the apartment? The trolls. Forgetting to make a to-do list? Trolls, obviously.

The latter, of course, was the worst. Forgetting to do things was annoying, but forgetting to do them even though you’d thought about making a to-do list and then just didn’t? A nightmare. Fucking trolls.

Penny had left the apartment with all the necessities; shoes, purse, phone, keys. She had a plan in mind that started with an outrageously expensive coffee and ended with a haircut. She knew what her plan was, had everything she needed. And that’s why she blamed trolls for the way her morning went.

When she got in line to get her coffee, she dug into her purse only to find that her wallet wasn’t in it. Which was ridiculous, because her wallet was always in her purse. She never took it out at home. The only options were that A. Peter took it (a joke) or B. She had been pickpocketed on the subway. Her head dropped back on her shoulders and she groaned loudly, ignoring the looks from the hipsters surrounding her.

“Ma’am, are you alright?”

Penny startled slightly and turned, not expecting a voice to come from quite so close behind her. The coffee shop was super busy, she shouldn’t have been so shocked that the patron behind her was so close, but it still startled her to nearly bump her nose on the man’s chest. She rocked back on her heel in surprise, nearly falling over if it wasn’t for the man reaching out and steadying her by the shoulders.

“Are you alright? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

His hands were fucking huge. They covered her shoulders entirely and curled down towards her shoulder blades, his grip tight enough to keep her on her feet but not bruising.

“Ma’am?”

“I’m,” she gulped slightly and shook her head, “sorry, I’m fine, just a drama queen I guess.”

“Are you sure? You seemed bothered by something before I scared you.”

Penny gave a small shrug and sighed with a self-deprecating smile on her face, “I think I was pickpocketed on the subway, my wallet’s gone. Should’ve been paying more attention I guess.”

She needed to get back home and call the bank, her debit card and credit card were in that wallet. And her driver’s license too, which meant a trip to the DMV. Was it even worth it to get a new one at this point? She literally planned to be in jail (prison?) by the end of the week.

“That’s horrible,” the frown on the man’s face didn’t do anything to mar how stupidly beautiful he was, “let me buy your coffee.”

“What? Oh my God, no, you don’t have to do that!” Penny had forgotten that his hands were still on her shoulders until she lifted her arms to wave off his concern, accidentally bumping against his elbows.

“Please, I’d like to,” he moved his arms, only to grab her flailing hands for just a moment before letting them go and moving to stand at her side rather than behind her, “my boyfriend should be showing up any moment and he’d skin me if I didn’t pay for you.”

She momentarily considered that Fuck All the Good Ones Really Are Gay right before relief filled her. Ever since the incident with Brock, men showing any amount of interest in her gave her goosebumps. Having a boyfriend meant that this one at least couldn’t have any ulterior motives, he was literally just being a good person. A genuine smile crossed her face at the realization.

“I guess it would be in bad taste for me to say no then, I wouldn’t want your boyfriend to skin you alive.”

“Alive?” The blond beside her laughed, a bone achingly deep and attractive laugh, “I want to point out that you escalated that, I assumed I would be dead before he skinned me.”

“Why am I skinning you, alive or dead?”

The man who appeared was definitely on par with the Adonis she’d already been speaking to. Standing next to each other, it was like looking at the cover of Men’s Fitness. He was tall and tan and built like a fucking tank, his shoulders looked so broad she wondered how he fit through doorways. Both of them, actually, how did either of them fit through doorways with shoulders wider than most people’s arm spans? Okay, that was an exaggeration but Penny was just about floored by how freaking attractive they both were.

“For not offering to pay for her coffee after she got her wallet stolen,” the blond responded with a grin, leaning over slightly to kiss his boyfriend’s cheek.

“You get mugged, sweetheart?” The frown on the brunet’s face was a goddamn crime and Penny quickly shook her head.

“No, no! Just pickpocketed, I think. Probably on the subway, I wasn’t paying as much attention as I should’ve been. It’s really not a big deal, I didn’t have any cash on me and I’ll just have my cards cancelled,” she gave a shrug and moved forward with the line, trying to pretend she wasn’t actually super upset over having to deal with yet another heap of bullshit.

“Well, Stevie’s right anyway, I’d skin him for not buying you a coffee. Are you traumatized doll? I’ll make him spring for a scone too.” Did he just wink at her? Penny’s told her heart not to stutter like that, he had a boyfriend for fuck’s sake.

“I don’t think I’m traumatized,” Penny turned big, brown eyes on the blond and tilted her head down for effect, “but I might be a little shaken, like enough for a cake pop.”

She didn’t notice the way both of them gripped each other’s waists, as if having to hold each other up under the onslaught of her puppy dog eyes, or the way that the brunet pinched his boyfriend’s side to keep him from offering her the entire world on a platter if she asked for it.

“A cake pop it is, sweetheart,” Stevie (Steve, Penny she supposed she should probably call him) gave her a nearly blinding grin and she had to stop herself from taking a step back in awe, “What’ll you have to drink?”

“A vanilla latte? Please,” she cleared her throat slightly, “Steve, was it? And you are?”

“Call me Bucky,” the brunet held his hand out for her to take and she hesitated for only a second, reminding herself again that they were gay, gay, gay before she shook it, “What’s your name sweetheart?”

“I’m Penny, thank you guys for being so kind,” they’d made it to the register and she stepped aside slightly so that Steve could center himself in front of the barista.

“Large black coffee, large white mocha, and a large vanilla latte please,” he ordered politely, before putting his arm around Penny’s shoulder and nudging her towards the dessert display, “Which cake pop did you want doll?”

Penny had to literally reign herself in under the weight of his arm, to not go stiff in fear or swoon at the feeling, “t-the, uhm, chocolate one, please.”

“And a chocolate cake pop,” Steve directed the barista with a smile.

“And a blueberry scone,” Bucky interrupted, jabbing his finger at the case, “And one of those giant chocolate chip cookies.”

The barista glanced at Steve for confirmation, who just nodded in response and held out a matte black credit card, “you two go sit, I’ll bring everything out once it’s done.”

“Ah finally, let’s ditch this punk, sweetheart,” Bucky snatched Penny’s hand and tugged her away from the line, heading for a table in the corner that was recently vacated.

She just barely heard Steve scoff before they got too far away, letting Bucky pull out her chair before sitting down. It vaguely registered in the back of her mind that this was the most bizarrely pleasant situation she’d ever been in. Considering the amount of shit she dealt with on a regular basis, it was a breath of fresh air. It was kind of a shame she hadn’t met the pair of them before she’d started actively planning how to get thrown in jail.  

“I think Stevie made a mistake,” Bucky snorted, breaking her from her thoughts and drawing her attention to Steve, who was fumbling with three coffees and several pastries.

The squeaking noise she made upon standing to go help was not deliberate and actually kind of embarrassing. She was pretty sure Bucky laughed at it as she walked away, quickly stealing one of the coffees and two of the pastry bags from Steve’s hands.

“Thanks doll, nice to know one of you has some manners,” Steve shot his boyfriend a look as he and Penny sat down, winking at the brunet when she wasn’t looking.

“You know, you’re lucky you’re so good looking or I wouldn’t put up with this kind of BS,” Bucky stated casually, reaching over to snatch his mocha from Steve’s grasp.

Steve rolled his eyes but didn’t reply to his boyfriend, “so, Penny, what do you do?”

The casual opening for conversation made Penny immediately uncomfortable and she shifted in her seat as he passed over her coffee and cake pop, “oh, lots of things. Barista, day care, that sort of stuff.”

“Day care, huh? You a kid person?” Bucky asked as he took a sip of his coffee, grimacing slightly as he burnt his tongue, “that shit’s hot, watch your tongue, doll.”

Penny shifted the cup between her hands carefully but avoided drinking any, “Kids are precious. Annoying as all Hell sometimes, but I do like working with them. I’m usually with the infants anyway, toddlers occasionally. At that age they’re just cute.”

“We never been around kids too much,” Bucky shoved almost half of the blueberry scone into his mouth in one go, mumbling something around the bite immediately after.

Steve rolled his eyes and reached across the table from his place next to Penny, pulling the scone away and replacing it with a napkin, “manners, jerk. I think he was saying we’ve only been around older kids.”

Bucky nodded in response, picking up the napkin to wipe his face before gesturing for the rest of the scone. Instead of giving it back, Steve pushed it in front of Penny before resting his arm over the back of her chair.

“Let Penny have some before you murder the rest of it, Buck,” the blond admonished, “have at, sweetheart.”

“Oh, that’s alright, I don’t need any,” she shook her head and pushed the bag over to Bucky, “thank you though.”

“Nah doll, you eat the rest of this, I’m gonna hit this cookie.”

He repeated the process of sticking at least 50% of the cookie into his mouth in one go, chewing obnoxiously while Steve dropped his face into his hands in embarrassment.

“You’re a nightmare, I can’t believe I bring you out in public.”

Penny laughed happily at their exchange, enjoying the casual friendliness. She got so wrapped up in the whole experience that by the time she noticed the clock, two hours had gone by.

“Oh shit! I’ve got so much to do today and—crap, I’ve gotta go home so I can cancel my credit cards,” she slapped a hand against her forehead, finally remembering that she was busy today. A lot of planning went into getting put in jail for child neglect and she was dropping the ball.

“Here doll, you can borrow my phone to cancel your cards,” Steve started digging into his pocket but Penny waved him off.

“I have a phone, I just have to get on my computer to look up the numbers to call,” she stood up, shoving her hand into her purse to grab her phone, only to freeze.

Her fucking wallet was in her purse. A deep red blush spread over her cheeks and down her neck. It would’ve been one thing to have missed that her wallet was in her purse, but Steve had gone out of his way to pay for her coffee. Embarrassment coursed through her.

“Hey, what’s wrong sweetheart?” Bucky stood from his seat, hand coming to rest on her shoulder as he curled his shoulders down, making her feel engulfed by his presence.

“I,” she closed her eyes and inhaled sharply, “I’m so embarrassed. I just found my wallet, it was in my purse, I swear I wasn’t trying to scam you— it wasn’t in there, I know it wasn’t but now it is and I—”

“Calm down, sweetheart, its alright,” she’d been drawn in to an all-encompassing hug before she really knew what was happening, pressed tightly to Bucky’s chest with his hand gently stroking the back of her head, “we don’t think you scammed us, it was an honest mistake. We’re just glad you didn’t get robbed, right Stevie?”

“Absolutely, doll, I’m glad you found it,” Steve had stood up as well and was standing just beside the pair, close enough that she could feel his body radiating heat, “don’t be embarrassed, things like that happen.”

Tears were welling in Penny’s eyes; how the fuck had she come across such nice, kind people at such a time in her life, “sorry, I don’t mean to be so emotional. Just having a rough go of things, I guess. Look, I really do need to get going. Thank you both so much for being so nice.”

“You don’t have to thank us for being nice,” the blond gave a small grin, his hand coming to rest on her shoulder from where she was still wrapped in Bucky’s arms, “How about we get your phone number before you leave? We’d love to have you over for dinner some time.”

Penny hesitated for a moment as they both reached for their phones; what was the point of giving them her contact information? Her days of freedom were shortly numbered, if they tried to call her they’d think she was ignoring them when she never answered. But still, what was the harm— she’d never see them again most likely. Even when she got out of jail she’d have a record of child abuse and who the fuck wanted to be friends with a child abuser?

She quickly punched her number into their phones and waited for each of them to call her cell so she’d have theirs, “well, it was great meeting you guys! I’ll see you around, okay?”

“Are you going somewhere nearby?” Steve gave a wide smile as he stepped a bit closer, sweeping his arm between himself and Bucky, “we’d be happy to walk you.”

“Oh, that’s not necessary,” Penny shook her head, distracted enough by the phone in her hand and the text message she’d gotten from Peter at some point during their conversation that she didn’t notice the way Steve’s smile tightened, “I’m just going to the salon to get my hair done.”

“We’ll walk you doll,” Bucky’s grin was as charming as the rest of him and she tried not to swoon, “You can tell us who you’re so excited to hear from on the way.”

“Excited to hear from?” She frowned in confusion before the brunet gestured to her phone, “Oh! Just my little brother, he got a 100% on his chem test, highest grade in the class.”

“That’s wonderful, must be a real smart kid,” The expression on Steve’s face was soft and fond as he led them out the door, and Penny wondered if he was thinking of his own little sibling from the proud glint in his eye.

“Peter’s a genius, we always joke that when I was born I took all the chaos and left him all the IQ points,” she flipped her pay-as-you-go phone back open as she received another text from the kid in question, “although with how often he gets his ass beat at school maybe he did get a bit of chaos too. I should’ve taught him to fight but he’s scrawny and I always worried he’d break his wrist trying to punch someone.”

“He gets beat up a lot?” She didn’t look up from her phone, too busy replying to Peter to catch the furious expressions the boyfriends exchanged over her head as they continued down the street.

“Nerd on nerd violence is surprisingly common,” Penny pursed her lips and waved her hand flippantly, “and he doesn’t get beat up anymore. I paid this girl in his grade to beat up his main bully when they were in freshman year and then Peter became friends with her, so he doesn’t get messed with too much anymore. I guess Flash was just super pissed Peter got a better grade in chem this time around,” a careful shrug came as she opened a new text message, “MJ will take care of it. I can’t beat up minors anymore.”

“You paid a girl to beat a kid up?” There was a disapproving tone in Steve’s voice and Penny immediately stopped walking and texting, looking up at the blond with a scowl.

“If it laid hands on the kid they’d of slapped me with a lawsuit and taken Peter away. He was too small to fight for himself, so yea, I paid one of his classmates to beat the shit out of the boy who sent him home with a black eye and bruised ribs. And I’m not ashamed of it either, that little asshole deserved what he got,” she jabbed her finger at his chest and left it there forcefully, “If I could’ve beaten the shit out of that little punk for what he’d done, I would’ve in a heartbeat. MJ was my next best option. If you’ve got a problem with how I take care of my little brother, you can get fucked because I couldn’t care less what some stranger thinks of—”

“Hey, hey, doll,” Bucky quickly stepped in, cutting her off and gently taking her wrist to pull her hand away from Steve’s chest, “I’m sorry my man put his foot in it. He’s a dumbass, doesn’t think before he speaks and certainly doesn’t consider the impact of his words. Steve, apologize.”

Penny pulled her hand away from the brunet and lifted both in a placating gesture, “I’m not interested in an apology, it doesn’t matter anyway. I’ve really got to get going.”

“Wait!” Before she really knew what was happening, Steve had grabbed both her arms and stepped into her space, holding her tightly in place, “please wait, Penny, I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“No, you shouldn’t have,” she tried to pull her arms back but he held firm, keeping her far closer than she was comfortable with, “let go of me, please.”

“You take great care of your brother, Penny, I shouldn’t have judged how you decide to do that.”

Bucky came up right behind, boxing her in between the pair and put his arms on her shoulders when she tried to pull back again, “hey, calm down sweetheart, don’t get upset.”

“Get off me! Both of you!” A spark of panic was starting to shoot through her, voice rising as she yanked hard on her hands and bumped roughly back against Bucky, “Get the fuck off!”

“Hey, what’s going on over here?!” Penny’s head snapped to the left to see a little old lady barging her way through the crowd, garnering the attention of several other people on the way, “you let her go, right now!”

Bucky and Steve pulled away like they’d been burned, both with placating, placid looks on their faces. Penny didn’t stick around to see if they could talk their way out of the situation, taking off down the street in a dead run. They were so fucking charming, so handsome they could probably talk their way out of a paper bag. She continued straight passed the salon she’d planned to stop at and kept running until she couldn’t anymore. Her breath came in exhausting pants and she bent over, holding her chest.

What the fuck, how could such a pleasant morning go so badly so fast? Bucky and Steve had seemed so nice and then out of nowhere thought they could manhandle her however they pleased. She could still feel Steve’s hands circling her wrists, Bucky’s pressing down on her shoulders and her back against his chest. The sensation of being held down hadn’t just been terrifying but had brought back brutal memories of being assaulted.

Just like when she’d been attacked, fury pumped through her veins. Those assholes, those fucking assholes. Penny found herself heading down to the closest subway station and getting on the train towards home. Fuck the salon, fuck getting her nails done, all she wanted to do was crawl into Peter’s bed and hide under the covers. It was easy to forget about everything she had to do that day in the wake of her panic.

Peter was still texting her, she could feel her cell phone vibrating inside of her purse as she boarded the subway and sat down heavily. She’d been out of the apartment for hours, accomplished nothing, and was thoroughly exhausted. Her head dropped back against the window and she clenched her eyes shut. The blows just kept coming. What a nightmare.

#steve rogers x oc x bucky barnes #steve rogers x oc #bucky barnes x oc #dark!steve rogers #dark!bucky barnes #dark!tony stark #dark!mcu #let's review #let's review chapter 4

[gamerwoo]

Luhan: Deception

Characters: Luhan x female reader

Genre/warnings: incubus au, technically guardian angel au??, angst, sorta fluffy??, kinda religious themes, suggestive themes, masturbation, mention of guns, blood, almost dying a few times lmao

Word count: 6,206

Summary: Being in the right place at the right time -- well, depending on how you look at it -- has caused Luhan much more trouble than he was looking for. You’re now convinced he’s your guardian angel despite the fact he’s really the complete opposite, but he’s willing to go along with it if it means getting what he wants.

a/n: this is part of a collab with 11 other writers and we all wrote different exo members as....incubuses? incubi? lmao anyway, so if you wanna read the others, you can find them on the masterlist!!

12 Days of Lust Masterlist

‘Too angelic-looking’. That’s what Luhan was always told whenever he was summoned by some stupid human with some sort of high sex-drive or ‘a need for thrill’. He couldn’t possibly be an incubus because he looked too ‘doll-like’ and ‘innocent’. To humans, he looked like he belonged in Heaven rather than Hell.

However, once he got them in bed, it changed. The way he moved his hips, the way his fingers and tongue could make anybody turn into a whimpering, babbling mess of ecstasy -- that was truly sinister. It was something only an incubus could achieve. He had years and years and years of practice, and he used that well. Whether he was summoned by some lonely human or wandering into the dreams of a poor, unsuspecting victim, Luhan was definitely kept busy.

He did have a weakness, though -- but maybe most, if not all, incubi could attest to the same weakness. He loved humans who were innocent. Those who were inexperienced and easily flustered. He assumed people saw him how he saw the innocent humans. Whenever he got the opportunity to fuck one, he always took it and savored it.

Which was why he went along with this stupid, stupid lie.

Luhan definitely wasn’t the type of person to believe in fate, and you honestly weren’t, either. But he had been in the right place at the right time three times. He had saved your life three whole times now. That couldn’t be a coincidence, could it? It had to mean something -- to you, anyway. To Luhan, he found it to be an inconvenience. Having to deal with pathetic humans in any capacity other than using them for his own pleasure was annoying and a nuisance, and the fact that you now saw him as something other than a random stranger you’d seen once or twice made his blood boil. At least, at first.

The first time you had run into Luhan, it was during something you never thought you’d have to witness. The bank you went to was being robbed. You were there to get a new debit card since yours was broken, and Luhan was there because his ‘pet’ -- as he semi-affectionately referred to his humans most of the time. But some crazy man with a gun ran in, and chaos broke out. He started shooting, wanting people to drop onto the floor while the tellers gave him the money. The women at the front desk were panicking, the patrons were panicking, and you were left frozen in place from fear.

“Get down!” somebody hissed as they threw their body on top of yours just as the man pointed the gun at you since you weren’t listening to his directions.

They managed to wrap one arm around your middle and catch themselves before the two of you hit the ground. But they kept their body on top of yours.

You would later learn after the man was apprehended and the weight was off of you that she stranger who saved you was Luhan. He politely held out a hand to help you to your feet, apologizing for throwing himself at you like that despite the fact he had whispered in your ear that you were “out of your fucking mind” for not moving -- which he wasn’t completely wrong about. But he didn’t introduce himself and he didn’t ask for your name, either. He only asked if you were okay before he went about his business, and you just assumed it was pure luck that somebody was there to save you.

Only a few weeks later would you run into the same stranger yet again. Only this time, you wouldn’t be too worked up from adrenaline, so you could actually get a good look at his face. After tugging you back toward the sidewalk after you walked out into traffic while you were on your phone, you gasped and looked up at that beautiful, oddly familiar face. His almost white hair almost looked like it was glowing as you stared at him in awe -- but it might’ve just been the sun bouncing off of it -- and his dark eyes looked back at you without any emotion. Just like the first time you’d run into him.

“Of course it’s you,” he deadpanned, though you could see the hint of a smirk on his face as one corner of his mouth just barely twitched upwards. “You’re quite the klutz, apparently.”

Despite being a demon, Luhan had to blend in with people when he was mingling with the humans. So it was only natural for him to try to save you despite the fact he didn’t really care if you lived or died. It wasn’t like it would have any impact on him, anyway. 

But to you, he was some sort of savior. The fact this was the second time he’d saved your life, plus the fact the way the sunlight hit his beautiful face made you think he could be some sort of guardian angel. But that couldn’t be real, right? Those couldn’t possibly exist. ...Right?

“You’re lucky I’m around when you do stupid things, huh?” he teased as he helped straighten you out before simply walking across the street just as the walk signal lit.

And all you could do was dumbly stare after him.

But the third time was when you made your move. You actually bothered to say something to him.

“W-wait!” you managed to speak up as he was about to walk away after casually saving your life for a third time.

You were positive he had to be some sort of guardian angel at that point.

Luhan, on the other hand, was positive natural selection was coming for you soon.

Despite that, he spun around on his heels to look at you, still showing no emotion on his angelic face.

“I need to thank you somehow,” you insisted, playing nervously with your fingers. “You’ve saved me like, a bunch of times already. Can I buy you a coffee or something? Dinner? I dunno, whatever you want.”

Luhan definitely had an idea of what you could give him. His latest human was completely useless to him now, and with how thick-skulled you already seemed, he was sure he could get you to do exactly what he wanted. But he figured maybe wining and dining you first would help.

“Dinner sounds lovely,” he decided with the first actual smile you’d seen from him.

But an hour and a half later, he had gotten himself into a situation he never would’ve imagined. He was no closer to sleeping with you. In fact, he might’ve been further from it. You kept saying nonsense about fate and how you didn’t believe in it but there was no way you and him running into each other over and over was a coincidence. He just wanted to tell you it was unlucky timing.

However, despite the rubbish spewing from your mouth during dinner, Luhan couldn’t help but take a liking to you. He had decided you would definitely become his next pet because you were just the type of human he liked. You told him straight away that you didn’t drink despite the fact you were of age to do so. He figured maybe you were trying to be sober or something, but you explained you were raised to think it was bad to drink and get drunk. That definitely piqued his interest. You were still trying to be a good girl, apparently. But then he started to learn more about you. He asked the typical questions he might ask for small talk, like about your job or your family or any partner you might have.

“Oh, I’ve… I-I don’t date,” you admitted sheepishly.

Luhan raised an eyebrow as he sipped his wine, “Oh? Why is that?”

“I’m just really shy,” you laughed nervously as you tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. “I don’t do any of that kind of stuff.”

“Would you want to?” he wondered. “You don’t have to answer if it’s too personal.”

But he wanted you to answer.

“It’s okay,” you assured him. “I think I would when I meet the right person.”

Did you think he was the right person? You were talking about coincidences and fate, so were you trying to hint at the fact that you thought meeting him was fate? That you were meant to be together?

Of course not. No, that would be too easy for him.

“I-I want to admit something…” you told him sheepishly as you leaned in slightly across the table. “You’ve saved my life three times now, and… Okay, I know this will sound crazy, but I feel like you’re like my guardian angel or something.”

That was Luhan’s opening, and he so stupidly took it.

“What would you say if I told you I am your guardian angel?” he asked quietly with a smirk.

You were naive enough to believe it, but Luhan was stupid enough to get himself into this stupid situation in the first place. So now he had to go along with this dumb lie just to get possibly one of the most innocent humans he’d ever met to be his new pet. And while he definitely didn’t want to have to act like some prim and proper angel, he knew that pounding you into the mattress would make everything worth it. So he would carry on with the stupid facade to gain your trust so he could use you for his own desires.

-

[day five]

It became routine for Luhan to check up on you. Well, he told you he was checking up on you. That was supposed to be his job as a guardian angel, but he was just doing it to get close to you. It was half-boring just hanging around like you did mundane things like washing dishes and doing laundry. However, it was also somewhat fun because he could just sit there and imagine all the things he could do to you in your house. He could lift you up onto the counter and take you there, or how he could easily push your head into the cushions of your couch when you’d bend over to place your folded laundry in a pile before carrying it off to your room.

“Luhan?” your voice broke him from his current daydream of sprawling you out on your counter.

The reality was that you were simply cutting up vegetables.

“Hmm?” he spoke up, eyes meeting yours as you looked back at him curiously.

“Isn’t it bad for people to know about their guardian angels?” you repeated your question. “In stories and stuff, they’re always supposed to be kept a secret. You won’t get in trouble, will you?”

‘I can do whatever the fuck I want,’ he thought to himself.

“No,” was what he replied with instead. “As long as you don’t go running off telling anybody, I’m fine.”

It wasn’t necessarily a lie. He knew how everything like that worked -- between the rules of his own kind, and the ones above. It was just common knowledge for all of them. He knew the angels knew of his rules, as well. Though, his rules were much more lenient. He could get away with far more than any angel could, such as sex. Angels weren’t allowed to even so much as think about something like that, but any demon or fallen angel could fuck anybody as often as they pleased.

Everybody may have pinned Luhan as an angel at first glance, but man, he was thankful he wasn’t one. How boring that life must be.

“What’s it like where you’re from?” you wondered as you looked back down at the vegetables you were prepping for dinner.

‘Where I’m from,’ he snorted to himself.

He noticed you never directly said the names of the places. He wasn’t really sure if you were religious so he figured maybe you just didn’t believe or something. Or maybe it felt too cliche to you to say. Or maybe you were just scared or nervous to say the names out loud. But still, he thought it was kind of funny. Maybe even a little bit cute.

Luhan had obviously never been to Heaven, so he wasn’t aware of what things were like there. He imagined everything was white and gold and pristine. He imagined everybody was prim and proper and perfect, and that somebody could have their wings ripped just for not standing up straight enough. He had a lot of ideas of what Heaven was like, but he wasn’t positive about any of them.

Then again, it wasn’t like you would know the difference between the truth and a lie.

“All of the angels wear white, and we stick to the rules closely,” he explained, trying to not sound like just the mere thought of having to abide by such stupid rules made him want to gag. “Only when we’re trying to fit in with the humans can we wear ‘human’ clothing. If we walked around in white all the time, we’d look odd, wouldn’t we?”

You looked over his current outfit, noticing the only light thing about him was his hair. Come to think of it, you never saw him in white. But he was usually hanging out in the human world with you, so that made sense to you. So you shrugged it off and went back to cooking.

-

[day thirteen]

Something Luhan could do was enter your dreams. He didn’t do it too often because he was worried you might start suspecting something, but he did do it every once in a while. The first time, not much happened. He laid on the bed with you and just talked to you. He wanted to do more, but he didn’t want you getting suspicious of him. He figured your curious and imaginative mind would assume he had some sort of angel power that could get him into your dreams, so he had to be softer with you -- at least for now. While you never mentioned your dreams about him, it was safe to assume you didn’t think he had any sort of power. But still, better safe than getting thrown back to square one.

You had come home from work looking especially stressed, so he figured this was the perfect opportunity. Your subconscious would probably come up with something to calm you down, so it would make the most sense for him to force himself into your dream to be that something.

“_____?” you heard his soft voice ask.

You were curled up under the covers, crying to yourself because you felt so overwhelmed. In your dream, there was a lot more going on than just whatever was bothering you at work, but you still ended up locking yourself in your room and sobbing. But hearing your guardian angel’s soft voice, you moved the covers from your head and looked over to see him standing by your closed door.

He frowned seeing your bloodshot and tear-stained eyes, “What’s wrong?”

“Everything,” you sniffled.

He walked over to you and climbed into your bed beside you. He got himself under the blankets and held his arms out for you, silently telling you that you could curl up against him instead of being alone in a sad little ball.

Something you did note despite being in a dream was that Luhan was dressed completely in black. He was wearing a fitted black t-shirt under a black leather jacket, black jeans that were ripped at the knee and looked a little dirty and worn, and even had black socks on his feet. But his hair was still the same beautiful blonde that made him look like a perfect porcelain doll.

As you rolled over and snuggled up to him instead, burying your face in the middle of his torso and letting your tears soak into his shirt, he began to stroke your hair back.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he wondered.

“I doubt talking will help,” you mumbled, your words almost lost in his stomach.

He chuckled at how you sounded like a pouting child, holding you closer to him, “Okay, then how about a distraction?”

“Like what?”

You could’ve written it off as your own subconscious for the reason Luhan began softly singing your favorite song. It was one you often listened to to boost your mood, and you typically found yourself humming it from time to time. However, Luhan knew that it was your favorite, and he knew that him singing it in his beautiful voice that you found so angelic would make you feel safer and happier.

And the fact that you nuzzled closer to him only proved that as an almost evil smirk tugged on the corners of his lips, his soft voice filling your ears.

When you woke and saw Luhan before you left for work, you didn’t say anything about your dream. However, he did note that you hugged him tightly before you left.

-

[day twenty-four]

“A guy?” Luhan all but growled, seeming absolutely appalled that you had just mentioned that you were going out with a guy tonight.

You nodded with a small ‘mhmm’ as you carried on with fixing your makeup in the bathroom mirror, “One of the customers from work.”

“You’ve been miserable because of work, _____!” he reminded you.

You paused putting on setting powder to look at Luhan in the mirror, “Why do you seem so upset?”

“I’m not, you can date whoever you want,” he insisted, which was true. He wasn’t here to make any deep, meaningful, emotional connections with you or anything. It’s just that it would be so much harder to get closer to you if you had a boyfriend you were going to dedicate your free time to. “I just… I mean, I’m your guardian angel, right? I’m supposed to worry about you.”

“Do you get like, bad feelings about things I do?” you wondered, still not completely sure of everything he was capable of.

“Yeah,” he nodded, knowing he could use this to his advantage. “I have a bad feeling about this guy, _____. I don’t want you to come home upset. What if he just wants to get in bed with you? You’re too innocent for that.”

“Am not!” you huffed, looking even more innocent and only proving his point.

He chuckled, “You’re still a virgin, _____.”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I’m innocent! I...d-do stuff…”

“You’re blushing and you haven’t even said anything dirty.”

“Shouldn’t you not be talking about this? You’re an angel,” you mumbled, just wanting to end the conversation.

As you focused back on your makeup, you missed the way that Luhan’s eyes raked over your body, imagining pushing your face up against the mirror as he fucked you into the counter from behind and turned innocent little you into a filthy, babbling mess.

If he could make sure your date was awful, he was sure he could do it.

-

He returned that night when he was sure you were home. The first thing he heard other than silence was sniffling coming from the couch. So he wandered into the living room with his hands in the front pockets of his jeans.

“_____?” he called out for you softly. “How’d the date go?”

Hearing him bring up your date only made you cry harder, burying your face in a throw pillow as you curled your knees to your chest. Luhan walked around the couch to see you sobbing into a pillow that you were basically hugging to your face, your cries muffled by it. He sat down beside you, an evil smirk on his face that you didn’t see as he gently touched your back.

“What happened?” he wondered softly, the concern in his voice contradicting how pleased he looked with himself.

“Y-you were right, Luhan,” you sniffed as you pulled the pillow away from your face and stared down at your knees. “All h-he wanted...w-was...was…”

He softly hushed you as he brushed the hair from your face before cupping your cheek and wiping away tears with his thumb, “I’m so sorry, _____. I wasn’t hoping to be right, I just wanted to keep you safe from being hurt.”

You met his eyes, yours full of heartbreak. But you saw sadness in his as he looked back at you.

“I-I’m s-sorry I didn’t listen…” you whimpered.

He shook his head, pulling you into his chest, “Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault and I could never be mad at you, anyway.”

As soon as your face was pressed into his chest, you cried harder, clinging to his shirt like your life depended on it. Your body shook with sobs as your tears soaked into his shirt. You really didn’t think that guy would’ve just wanted to have sex with you. When you met him, he seemed so sweet and polite and so opposite of how he was on your date. Was it all just a facade?

No, it was all Luhan’s doing.

“I should’ve stayed home with you,” you cried, your words being muffled by Luhan’s chest.

“It’s okay, you’re home with me now,” he cooed. “I’ll always be here for you, _____. You know that, don’t you? I only exist to protect you and keep you safe and happy. I won’t ever hurt you.”

He smirked to himself as he felt your arms wrap around his waist and hug him tighter. Your body melted into his, finding comfort in his embrace, which was exactly what he was going for.

You trusted him. He was your guardian angel, after all.

“I know,” he heard you whimper.

-

[day twenty-five]

It was risky, but it made sense. Luhan had to think of how your subconscious would work, and this made sense. If he entered your dream and tried to make a move now, it wouldn’t be too out there. You saw him as somebody you could trust, and since he was around everyday, it made sense for you to think of him often. On top of that, if things didn’t work out, he could easily just blame the dream on what had happened with that guy you went on a date with. You wouldn’t suspect a thing, he was sure of it. But the best case scenario was that you just indulge in your little dream he was going to give you.

Again, you were laying in bed. But this time, you were much less...covered. You were wearing only a thin t-shirt and some panties that Luhan could see from the way you were curled up into a ball. He bit his lip as he sauntered into the room, seeing that you were awake and staring — more like glaring — at the wall across the room from him. 

“What’re you thinking about?” he wondered in a soft tone. 

“Why are men disgusting?” you grumbled, letting out a sigh as you stayed in your position. “Like, he was so nice to me just to sleep with me! That’s fucked up, right?”

‘Oh, sweetheart, if only you knew the half of it.’

“Of course it is,” he feigned sympathy as he sat down on the bed and you felt it dip behind you. You felt one of his hands begin to rub your outer thigh softly, and the way your heart started to race at the touch was...odd. “Your virginity is precious to you and you should lose it to somebody you know well and trust, anyway. Somebody who would never use you.”

‘Somebody like…’ you couldn’t even finish your thought. You felt dirty just putting the two together. But you did trust Luhan more than anybody, and who would know you better than your own guardian angel?

‘But he’s an angel,’ you told yourself, ‘that’s wrong. You can’t do that with him.’

You shook the thought from your head as you rolled over and sat up against the headboard, sitting beside Luhan. You could feel him looking at you, his fingertips still lingering on your skin, but you couldn’t look at him.

“You look conflicted,” he murmured, his lips much closer to your ear than you thought, and his soft voice sent a shiver through you. “Tell me what you’re thinking about.”

“N-n-nothing,” you told him, feeling your cheeks heat up. There was no way you could tell him the idea you had. “I’m still just thinking about what happened.”

But Luhan was pretty sure he had an idea of what you’d thought of. He smirked as his fingertips trailed higher, and his eyes darkened seeing the way your thighs pressed together.

“Did you maybe think that...I would take it from you?” he asked with an innocent tone to his voice. 

“N-no!” you insisted much to quickly to be convincing.

“Is that what you would want, _____?” he cooed as his hand pushed your shirt up until he was touching the waistband of your panties. “Would you trust me with that?”

Your eyes were glued on his hand as it trailed across your underwear and down between your legs. You absolutely knew you shouldn’t be dreaming this, but feeling his slender fingers brush over your clothed clit and hearing his soft voice so close was already getting you worked up. Would it really be so bad if you just dreamed of Luhan like this? You wouldn’t have to tell him…

‘He’s an angel, _____!’ you reminded yourself, ‘Of course it’s still bad!’

“Luhan, I—“

You wanted to tell him to stop or you wanted to dream of something else but he began rubbing slow circles into your clit, drawing a quiet whimper from your lips. Luhan chuckled as your cheeks tinted pink and you slapped a hand over your mouth. 

“You sound so cute, baby,” he teased, leaning in closer. “I wonder what other noises I can get you to make…”

His lips were mere inches from yours, and you were frozen in place. You wanted to back away but you also wanted to lean in. You wanted so much more but you knew you should stop. And yet, your words were stuck in your throat. 

His index finger hooked into your panties, pushing them to the side, and that was when you suddenly found your voice and your muscles. 

“Stop!” you cried as you shoved away from him. You scrambled off the bed and looked at his shocked expression, suddenly feeling awful. “I-I’m sorry. I just… I know this must be a dream because you’re an angel and you can’t do things like this, and I shouldn’t be dreaming of things like this with you and— Why am I even explaining this? It’s not real and you’re not real.”

“Exactly, none of this is real,” he nodded as he crawled across the bed toward you, “so it wouldn’t make a difference if we kept going, right?”

“I-I can’t,” you shook your head, stepping back until your back hit the wall. “It would be too much on my conscience. I couldn’t ever look him in the eye again.” 

“But don’t you want to keep going?” his voice was sultry like the look he was giving you, one of his hands reaching out to grab your waist. “Don’t you want—“

You gasped, your eyes flying open as your alarm went off. You quickly sat up and shut it off before your eyes scanned the room. Nobody was there, but the blankets were off your body, and your pajama bottoms were gone when you were sure you put them on. You figured you must’ve gotten too hot in the middle of the night. 

You got up, turned on the light, and got changed before leaving your bedroom. As you went to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee, Luhan appeared on the counter. You gasped and jumped back, feeling your cheeks heat up. You knew he didn’t know about your dream but you were still embarrassed and averted your eyes. 

Luhan was grumpy this morning because his plan failed, but seeing how flustered you were now made him smirk. He at least was a step closer now. 

“How was your night?” he asked

“Fine,” you replied quietly as you stepped back toward the coffee maker. 

“Did you sleep well?” he wondered. “Dream of anything?”

Your eyes widened as you softly cleared your throat and tried to hide the blush that was deepening on your face behind your hair, “U-um, no. Dreamless night again.”

Luhan sat back, licking his lips, “Thats good.”

-

[day thirty-one]

Just because Luhan was around didn’t mean you were any less clumsy. More often than not, Luhan spent his time catching you before you fell on your face or keeping you from chopping off your finger while making dinner. 

But Luhan wasn’t with you 24 hours a day. You figured he must’ve had other responsibilities as an angel, so you didn’t expect him to always be around you. But when he wasn’t around, there wasn’t somebody there to keep you from maiming yourself. 

Like now. 

But with his perfect -- or shitty -- timing, Luhan appeared in your apartment not too much longer after your little incident. Since the living room was empty, he turned to go down the short hallway to your bedroom to find you. However, he stopped when he saw you on the floor with blood dripping from the side of your forehead.

“Oh fuck, _____!” he gasped as he got down beside you, holding your head as he examined where you’d hit your head off the corner of the wall. “What the hell did you do?!”

“I mopped the floor and I slipped,” you replied as if this was a normal occurrence.

“You’re bleeding!”

Luhan could’ve gotten up and gone to get a towel or something to clean the blood off of your skin, but he was kind of panicking a little. It wasn’t that he cared, he just didn’t expect to come into your place and see you on the floor with your head bleeding onto your shirt. So he did the first thing he thought to do: take off his shirt and dab at your wound with it to mop up the blood.

Despite the sting you felt, all you could focus on was Luhan’s bare torso. After the dream you had about him, you just...didn’t feel the same about him. You still liked him around and trusted him, but now you felt more intensely about him in a few ways. And having him shirtless in front of you and just a couple inches away, it was all you could think about.

“You’re gonna have to mop the floor again,” he chuckled. “On the bright side, it doesn’t seem bad enough to go to a hospital.”

Your eyes glued to his body, all you could do was hum in response.

-

[day thirty-four]

You really tried to control yourself. You didn’t want to be weird toward Luhan and you didn’t want to even make yourself feel dirty, but it was so difficult to not think about. Your dream about him was already bad enough, but now seeing him shirtless and so close to you while he took care of your head was…

Let’s just say, you were definitely in trouble. 

Your imagination ran wild more often than not and you were afraid that Luhan was catching on. You had to do something about it because it was really suspicious how you found it hard to look him in the eyes. So you figured maybe it would be better to just...get your feelings out in a certain way. Maybe if you let yourself think about him, you could move past this weird feeling. 

So you did. 

While Luhan’s big plan was to make you trust him and lust after him, he didn’t think something as simple as taking his shirt off would help him with that. He didn’t even think anything had changed that day, but he was in for a big surprise when he appeared in your living room that day, realizing it was empty and figuring you were in your room.

“She better not have hit her—“

His grumbling was cut off by a soft moan of his name. He froze, eyes wide as he strained his ears to listen for more sounds. He could hear the wet sounds of your fingers pumping in and out of your heat, the way your bed moved a little as you rocked your hips against your own hand, and every quiet moan and mewl you made. A smirk slowly formed on his face as he strolled up to your bedroom door, realizing now was his chance. He took off his jacket and dropped it carelessly in the hallway as he approached your door, silently opening it and peeking in to watch you. 

Your eyes were closed as you fingered yourself, imagining your dream with Luhan from the other night had gone father. You imagined your fingers were his as you pumped them faster, chasing your orgasm with flushed cheeks and quiet whimpers of his name. Your back arched just a little off the bed, and you—

Somebody grabbed your wrist and pulled your fingers out of yourself. You gasped, your eyes flying open to see Luhan smirking down at you as he brought your fingers to his lips and sucked them into his mouth, tasting your arousal and moaning quietly.

“L-Luhan?” you asked in a quiet, shaky voice. 

“Mm,” he removed your fingers from his mouth and leaned down, his face inches from yours. “Don’t be embarrassed, sweetheart. I just want to join you. You’re so cute when you get yourself all worked up like that.”

You really didn’t want to tell him no. You wanted to pull him down on top of you right there, but you were too concerned about him. He was an angel. Wasn’t this against the rules? Wouldn’t he get in trouble? Then you’d never see him again. 

“But what about—“

“Don’t worry about anything,” he shushed you softly as he crawled onto the bed, causing you to lean back farther and farther until he was above you. “I won’t get in trouble, I promise. My rules aren’t quite what you think.”

Finally, he pressed his lips to yours in a searing kiss that made your heart race. You weren’t really sure what to do with your hands — yes, you had kissed other people before but this was Luhan — but you found them pressing against his shoulders and pushing him off of you.

“Luhan, I can’t,” you insisted, unable to meet his eyes. “I want to, I swear I do, but what if you get in trouble?”

“What if I can make you a promise, then, hm?” he purred as he tilted your chin up with his finger, forcing you to look up at him. “A deal, kind of.”

This was it. All it would take was the deal. It didn’t even matter if he took you right here if there was a deal involved. He could take you back with him if he wanted to and keep you as long as he pleased, making you wait as long as you made him wait. He could do anything with you and to you if you said yes.

He could drop his stupid charade if you said yes.

“A deal?” you asked in a quiet voice. “Like what?”

“If you give into this feeling you have for me, I can assure you that nothing bad will happen to me. There will be no repercussions for me for these actions. Sound good?” he asked, a soft smile on his face as he tilted his head slightly to one side.

You hesitated, thinking it over. Though, you couldn’t see any reason why Luhan of all people would lie.

“...Promise?”

“I promise.”

Slowly, you finally nodded, “Then...yes.”

“Perfect,” Luhan’s voice was just short of a growl, a smile spreading across his face. It would’ve seemed like any other smile if his eyes hadn’t suddenly gone pitch black, causing your eyes to widen as you sucked in a breath. But because it was Luhan, you didn’t scream or try to get away. You just stared at him with a small hint of fear in your eyes. He was a little surprised, but he remembered how you’d felt about him. “Of course you won’t run away from me. You trust me, don’t you?”

You nodded slowly. You didn’t know what was going on, but you trusted Luhan.

He smirked, a hand stroking your hair back softly before his fingers gripped your hair roughly, making you let out a sharp gasp.

“Of course you do. Because you’re a naive little human. You’ve given all your trust to a demon who’s lied to you for over a month now.”

“D-demon?” the words barely fell passed your lips in a quiet squeak.

He nodded with a hum that almost sounded happy, “And now, because you’ve said yes to our ‘promise’, you’ve given me your soul. But don’t worry, _____, we’ll have a lot of fun.”

-

#exo #luhan #exo au #exo imagine #exo scenario #exo oneshot #exo fanfic #demon!exo #incubus!exo #exo smut #exo x reader #luhan au #luhan imagine #luhan scenario #luhan oneshot #luhan fanfic #demon!luhan #incubus!luhan #luhan smut #luhan x reader #exo aus #exo imagines #exo scenarios #exo oneshots #exo fanfics #luhan aus #luhan imagines #luhan scenarios #luhan oneshots #luhan fanfics

[smudgedtoon]

The missing days

“I'm not sure.” It sounded better than I dont know. But honestly I didn't  know, anything; about where I'd been, who I'd been with. It was all a blur.  Or I want to say it was a blur, but more like if it had been sanded away delicately in small areas and rather harshly in the rest.

The cop scuffed and waved me off. I tried to make him wait but he cut me off with a disgruntled. “Come back when you know what you need.”

“Fine.” Huffing I left the police station. Looking around found me a bench to sit on and think.

Now to go over what I did know barring things like where I lived, how old I was;

1.I knew my name, obviously or else I'd have told the officer that at the very least. But just to be sure my name's Zenith. This didn't come as a shock to me because I knew everything else about me except and this leads to...

2. I was missing days. Two at the very least. I mean it had to only be two, I checked my phone twice to make sure. But it felt like more...

3.I woke up in someone else's apartment in a weird part of town.

4. There should be no weird part of town, I've lived here all my life.

“Okay go from what you know…. So before I can't remember, what do I remember….” I recieved dirty looks from strangers passing by but screw em, talking out loud helps me think. I knew this, I knew….. “Work?....Work!” I had work….; not what I needed right now but that was a start. I pulled out my phone again dialing the number by heart. A quick glance at my screen clock had told me my shift hadn't started yet, so I was going to call sick. As I waited for someone to answer the other line my thoughts went back to working out just what I needed help with. Wait work…. the two missing days were on my off days? No, that felt wrong.

Finally someone answered.

“Hey thanks for waiting this is Derek from Game-On speaking, what can I get you playing today?”

“Hey Derek its-”

“Oh shit dude its you.” Derek voice went high with surprise and then low as if he was being listened to. “Calling to beg for your job back? Yes, we do have a couple of Playstation 4 fallout 76 bundle packs left from our Sale!”

“What?” I said cringing at the yelling and confused. “what do you mean-”

“dude ol Heely's still has a controller up her ass from that shit Fr- Oh no I'm sorry we're not offering a free copy with the bundle any longer, though it already comes with the game! dude heelys comin this way gotta go…. Thanks for calling and may your ending cutscene be epic!”

The line cut out. I wanted to call again, but Derek had sent me a text. ‘Dont call back… Heely just threatened to fire any of us talking to you on company time. I'll text after work’

Resisting the urge to text back, I began my walk home. I walked slowly hoping something along the route would help me remember more about the last couple of days. My stomach growled as I passed a small dinner, when was the last time I ate? Some customers left and through the closing door I caught a whiff of something delicious, another grumble. Checking my wallet I found I had no cash, strange, I think I should've had money. What I did have however was my credit and debit cards. I didn't want to check my bank account out of fear of what I would find so credit it was.

I walked into the building and was instantly hit with a sense of familiarity….; but why? Looking around I noticed nothing really special it was your typical mom and pop diner with vinyl booth seats and mounted down tables. The floors were not what I expected instead of the usual checkered patterned linoleum it was if someone had painted a galaxy. It felt like it was pulling me in.

“-always gets people.” A voice interrupted my thoughts.

Looking up a saw a massive   smiling down at me. I took her in. Her face was round and cheerful yet it wasn't exactly youthful, though I wouldn't say she looked old, rather she looked like someone who knew a thing or two about life. She had warm brown eyes that reminded me of tinted glass lanterns, her hair…. My jaw dropped. Her hair if it was actually hers was as amazing as the floor. Okay that sounded wrong….. her hair was long, almost ass length, locked and dyed to look like the night sky, she must have used a glittery hair spray to get it to shimmer like that. “uhhhh….” I managed pathetically.

“Oh I was saying, the floor really draws People in. It's new. ” She said nodding to the ground. She hadn't seem to notice me gawking or if she had she didn't say anything about it. “Welcome to Mookie’s.”

“Mookie’s?”

Her brows furrowed and her gorgeous smile was replaced with a scowl. It only lasted as long as a blink of eye. Her smile returned but with a little tension in her voice she asked. “Is that a problem?”

“N-no. Just an unusual name…” I back pedaled. “ummm can…. I… have a table?”

She nodded and took me to an empty booth near the kitchen. As she waited for me to sit down she explained the name. “Its named after someone close to my family.”

I nodded feeling like a huge dick. I was sure I was gonna get my food spit- Shit did I just insult the owner.

As if reading my mind, the woman added. “Actually more close to the owner, my grams, than me.”

“Oh.”

Awkward silence. She looked as if she was waiting for something but then grew impatient and started speaking again.

“So I'm Vi and I'll be your server today.” she nodded towards the the end of the table  where I found the menus. “Would you like a drink while you look at the menu?”

“Sure, I'll have tea please.” I said wanting this to be over with as soon as possible.

She nodded and said. “I'll be right back with that,” before departing.

“Well Zeni, you really fucked that up and she was cute too.” I muttered to myself as I looked through the menu. I turned between the pages until I spotted what I wanted.

When Vi returned with my drink I ordered and she left. As I began to make my tea I paused. On my saucer was the standard small kettle of hot water, but the odd thing or rather the awesome thing there wasnt a tea bag insight, just lemons and honey. As I set about squeezing the slices of lemon into my cup I felt like I was being watched. Looking around I spotted my observer. A little black girl, dressed adorably in a black tee that read future boss lady and red cat eye glasses as well as shorts and black and purple kitten leggings, was sitting on one the stools at counter seating and had swiveled around to face me. I waved and the girl excitedly smiled and waved back before looking around quickly to make sure no one had seen. She swiveled back to face the counter and I chalked the whole thing up to kids being kids.

Going back to what I was doing. A thought popped in my head. Jessica. She'd probably have some idea of what had happened. After all she was my girlfriend. Why hadn't I thought of calling her when this first happened? My brain buzzed as I tried to probe that thought a bit further, eventually I wrote it off as how awkward it would be to call one's significant other to pick you up and fill you in on why you were at a strangers house and couldn't remember the past two days.

“You should drink your tea before it stops being hot.”

I was jerked out of my thoughts to see the little girl sitting across from me. When had she done that, I'd only be lost in my thoughts for a moment and the distance would've taken her more than that to get to my table from where she was, unless she had run over. That must've been it. Realizing the girl was awaiting some type of response, I put on a smile and lifted up my cup giving her a cheesy cheers and took a sip. Oh gods my brain screamed as the taste of hot yet diluted sour spread across my tongue. It was all I could do to not spray the kid with unsweetened lemon tea.

She giggled and the pointed to the honey. “You forgot the honey Zeni.”

“Yeah you're right.” I said after swallowing. I reached for the honey and paused. “Uhhhh… sweetie, Zuntie Zeni is tired it's been a long day what's your name again?” Zuntie Zeni? It sounded right… I'd never used the phrase in my life- I brought my focused back on what was important this kid knew me and somehow I must've known them from my auto response.

Her brows furrowed as she pulled a face only children have the balls to make and for a split second she'd reminded me of someone. That face then broke into one of utter sadness. She mumbled something to herself, I only caught “really don't”.

Before I could ask her anything a plate of food was placed before me. I got a brief glimpses of a scarred arm before it was pulled away. I looked up to see Vi.

She gave me something that resembled a smile before turning to little girl. “One what have I told you about pestering customers.” She turned to me and apologized. “Sorry about this, the meal is on the house. If you'd-”

“Its fine. Really, One,”  hope I hadn't butchered the girl's name, “was keeping me company and showing me the fine art of making lemon tea.” I  winked at the girl and she giggled.

“See Zuntie Zeni's fine.”

A volt of pain went through my brain and I had to grab the table for balance even though I was already sitting.

I awoke in my bed with my head still killing me.  I remembered somethings. From my disassociated meal at the diner to what had happened almost three days ago.

I had been fired on my last day of work before my days off, fired was an understatement. It had been a shit show, my ex, I know remembered why I wouldn't have called Jessica, had gotten it into her head that Heely and I were having some type of affair. She'd gone to the store wrecked it and then assaulted Heely and accused me.  The thing was though Heely had been showing me the ropes of management. From there I had been invited to a party by Derek to cheer me up. I had meet a girl. We'd spent the whole party talking and joking around. It was her I'd went home with her. From there things had gotten hazy again. All I could remember was her name. “Te.” I felt a shiver run down by spine before I fell asleep again.

#52 week short story challenge #week 1 #p writes #short story

[blahandwhatever]

Blehish

I ran out of magnesium a few days ago, and it kind of fucked up my sleep and mental state. Maybe I need to take that more regularly now because of the calcium I’m taking. I just replaced it; hopefully I’ll feel good again soon.

I had hoped I could get my Target purchases refunded to my old debit card even though it’s deactivated because sometimes refunds can go back to such cards, but I could only get cash, so that part of my bank account replenishment plan did not work. We’ll see how Kohl’s goes. Damn fraud person.

I got excited to find some crostatine at Jewel today, but a) they were almost expired and b) they were not from the brand that I’d had them from in the past. I tried one and it was decent, not amazing. Crostatine from Mulino Bianco are the legendary Pokemon of my confectionery life - rarely encountered and magnificent. I loved them as a child in Italy, and only came across them once or twice since moving away from there. The last time was in high school, when they were briefly available in the Italian section of some store. They tasted exactly how I’d remembered them, both perfect, delicate, un-American flavors with their perfect creamy-and-crumbly textures. And then, within a couple of months, they were gone from the shelves. One time in college I got a serious craving for these and scoured the internet for a way to obtain them in America, but there was no site that shipped them to the US, and I never came across them at a store again. I thought about paying an Italian to buy me some and send me them but never got around to it. At this point, I’m not into eating junk food enough to go out of my way for it (ok, except my essential food group of hot Cheetos), but I do hope our paths will someday cross again.

Tomorrow I’ll probably go to my parents’ house, and I look forward to a bike ride, and the animals, and the plants, and my brother, and Naperville, but not my father, god, not my father. Even when he’s nice to me, it’s uncomfortable, all the more so knowing that he’s still an asshole to my mother, and presumably my brother. I’ve been thinking more than usual about the puzzle of his psychological issues, and if there’s any way to solve it, to free everyone from his toxicity once and for all, other than waiting it out until they can leave him behind. In theory, of course there is; in practice, it’s incredibly hard even for professionals to get through to people like this, with their elaborate scheme of defense mechanisms, their desperate repression of the unbearable lifelong pain within them, their already-tattered ego that can’t bear the idea of there being anything wrong with them, and their expert manipulation of reality and tendency to project their own issues onto others. You certainly can’t do anything attackey, like labeling them a narcissist. I’ve thought about starting at the source and finding him some books on childhood trauma that could make him reflect on the childhood he doesn’t think there was much wrong with - if his mind is open to that. I’ve thought about starting with the most immediately impactful thing, namely understanding and managing emotions, emotional intelligence stuff. I don’t want to dump too much on him at once. And it has to be coming from experts, not me, given what an unreliable narrator I am in his world and how easily anything I say can be turned against me. I don’t even know if or when I’ll do this, but I’ll definitely get some of those books and slowly read through them when I get into these moods where I get hung up on his bullshit to at least do something more constructive than dwelling or engaging in tiresome imaginary arguments.

[daisbucky]

Call Me Baby (Bucky x Reader)

pairing: Reader x Bucky Barnes prompt: ‘i keep calling tech support because you’re helpful and also your voice is really cute’ au warnings: none word count: 1587  authors note: I’m too indecisive of how I wanna write my other series so I thought why not write something else instead (help me).

Bucky doesn’t listen to a lot of things Sam tells him to do, hell, Bucky tunes out Sam’s voice most of the time, but for some reason, Bucky decided to listen to Sam’s suggestion to get a job outside of being an Avenger, more specifically Sam told Bucky he should become tech support because of how ‘monotonous’ his voice was. 

Bucky was half-offended at his comment but also decided, why the hell not? He wasn’t doing much at the tower besides training till he got his next mission so why not do something else? 

Thanks to Tony, who managed to pull a few strings, Bucky was now working as tech support for Bank of America part-time. Because of Bucky’s special case, instead of working at one of Bank of America’s tech support offices, he was able to work at one of the offices at the Avenger’s tower instead. 

It wasn’t all bad; Bucky picked up on the terminology quickly and didn’t have difficulty with helping out anyone who called. If he was full-time, Bucky would probably be one of the best tech support, his soothing voice calmed even the most irate person.

It was around 3 in the morning when Bucky clocked in for work. He had just gotten back from a short mission with Natasha, nothing too serious.

After a quick shower he walked into the small office room specifically for him. Since no one was awake, he didn’t bother to wear much, just his most comfortable black sweatpants that hung low on his waist.

He placed on his headset and signed on the computer, typing his password with ease. He signed on the network portal of BoA, quickly typing in his information and within seconds he was logged on for work.

Most of the time around this hour, he would be helping customers through their IM chat support, rarely anyone called so early in the morning.

Once Bucky finished helping out an old lady who thought they lost their card, the telephone on his desk began to ring.

He lets out a yawn before picking it up, his smooth, velvety voice stating their signature line, “Hello, this is James, tech support for Bank of America, how can I help you?”

You almost drop your phone at the incredibly attractive voice you just heard from your phone. It took you a few seconds before replying, “H-hi.”

Bucky internally chuckled at your response, “(Y/N) is it? It has come to my attention that you’re having trouble logging into your online account?”

“Y-yeah, I’ve been trying to access but I can’t seem to remember my password or any of the answers to my security questions.” You tell him, your cheeks burning from embarrassment.

Bucky lets out a chuckle, “No worries, it happens to all of us, nothing to be ashamed of.”

You smile at his sentiment.

“I would need for you to recite your debit card number as well as the last digits of your social security number.”

You quickly state your information, stumbling on the last four numbers of your debit card number.

“Thank you, give me one moment please.” He states, a short moment of silence ensues.

You bite down on your lip, wondering how this James guy looks like. You wondered what color his eyes were, what hair color he had, if he had full lips, or how tall he was.

God were you falling in love with some guy you’ve never seen before? All because he has a nice voice?

“(Y/N)?” His voice snaps you out of your thoughts, you reply back.

“For some reason your current account is inaccessible, so what I’ve done for you is open you a new account. The link to assign a password will be sent to the email address on file.”

You let out a sigh of relief, “There’s nothing wrong with my account though right? No new transactions since yesterday or anything?”

“No there isn’t. The last transaction was from a coffee shop, is that from you?”

“Yes, that’s me, oh thank goodness.” You say out loud.

“Other than not being able to access your online account, there isn’t anything else wrong.”

“Thank you so much James!”

Bucky smiles at the way you said his name, his heart fluttering at the sound of your voice.

“Is there anything else I can help you with?”

Can I have your number? You say in your head.

“No, that was it. Thank you!”

“I’m glad to be of service, have a great rest of the morning (Y/N).”

“You too James.”

–

It was like some kind of sick joke, you thought, why could you be having so much trouble with logging into your online bank account?

You’ve had your last one for four years, and now your new one won’t let you on for some reason.

Frustrated, you dial the number for tech support, wanting answers to why you’re having so many problems.

“I’ll change banks if this happens one more time,” you mumble under your breath.

“Good evening (Y/N), this is James from tech support, how can I help you?”

Your anger simmers down from the sound of his familiar voice, you couldn’t believe it was him again.“

“Hey James, I don’t know if you remember me but I called in last week cause there was something wrong with my online account and now, I can’t login again. I’ve changed my password twice already and I can’t access it still.”

A smile breaks onto his lips, hoping that it was you that was calling.

Since last week, he hasn’t stopped thinking about you, he wondered if you were as beautiful as your voice.

“I’m so sorry to hear this, I’ll check out your account to see if there is anything wrong.”

A few minutes pass, only the faint sound of keyboard clicking filled the silence, you wondered if it was okay to have small talk with him.

Ah fuck it, you thought, “you’re up so late.” You state, feeling ridiculous the moment the words left your lips.

Bucky chuckles at your words, “I pick the weirdest times cause that’s when I’m available.”

“Oh.” You say, “What do you do then? Other than this I mean. Oh wait, you don’t have to answer that, I don’t know if I can ask that.”

Bucky smiles, picturing an embarrassed look on your face.

“I work for a company that helps out people.” Bucky states, not wanting to advertise he’s a part of the Avengers. Especially since if word got out, tons of people would be calling him.

“Ah, you’re an amazing person then.” You hear yourself saying.

Bucky swears he’s never smiled this much in a long while, especially from someone he’d never met before.

“You’re too kind, I just try to do what’s right.”

“So what time is it over where you live?” You ask, hoping maybe by some luck the two of you were close to each other.

“It’s almost 1am over here.”

You check the time on your phone and notice that it was the same time as yours, just maybe he lived in New York as well.

“Not tired yet?” You ask him, a yawn escapes your mouth.

“Nah, not yet, seems like you’re tired.” He says with amusement.

You bite down a smile, “Just a bit.”

“There doesn’t seem to be a problem with your account but would you like me to set you up with another account?”

“Yes, that would be great James.”

After a few clicks, Bucky makes another account for you and thank him profusely, bidding him a good night after you got the link to the new account.

–

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” You let out, startling a few of the customers in front of you.

It was the morning after you got your third account, you were signing in through your phone to see your balance but lo and behold, it was not signing in.

You were in line at your favorite coffee shop half a block from your place, you were going to get some coffee before work.

“This is just my luck, ugh.” You sigh, slipping the phone in your back pocket.

Once it was your turn in the front of the line, you gave the cashier your order and stood at the bar where they placed finished drinks.

You grab your phone from your pocket, clicking on the BoA icon. You try to login for the third time, you get the error notification.

“I am so totally changing banks,” you say out-loud.

“I take it you can’t access your account?” You hear a familiar voice from behind you.

You turn around and your eyes meet a pair of gorgeous steel-blue eyes, his face framed with chocolate brown hair, and cherry lips.

“James?” You find yourself saying, stunned at the most handsome man standing before you.

“Yeah, but you can call me Bucky.” He grins, tucking a strand of his hair behind his ear.

You felt your cheeks heat up, Bucky can totally tell you’re staring at him.

“Just putting it out there but I’m definitely switching banks.”

“As long as you give me your number, I think i can manage.”

#Bucky Barnes #Bucky Barnes imagine #Bucky Barnes oneshot #Bucky oneshot #Bucky fanfic #Bucky Barnes fanfic #Bucky Barnes x reader #Bucky x reader #Bucky Barnes x you #Bucky x you #marvel #marvel fanfic

[plathwasaperfectionist]

Chances are, if you’re in college, you’re pretty new to living on your own and managing your own money. Especially if you have to pay for things on your own, but even if you’re just making loan money last through the semester, it can be overwhelming. I’ve been paying my own way for almost two years now, and I’ve learned a TON about how to save money, prioritize, and live off more than ramen and bottom-shelf vodka (although bottom-shelf wine is still fine by me). Here are the best tips I have to offer:

1. Cook at home

Meal plans are a rip-off, and ordering food all the time is a waste of money. It’s so much cheaper (not to mention healthier) to buy your own groceries and cook your own meals. Even if you’re in a dorm kitchen with a mini fridge in your room, you can do a lot with some basic kitchen supplies and groceries. I love this website to find recipes--it breaks each recipe down by the cost per serving, so you know exactly how much each meal is costing you. Once you realize you can make filling food yourself relatively easily for a small fraction of what you would pay even at a fast food place, it’s hard to justify the expense. Just tonight I made a huge pot (probably six servings) of three-bean chili for less than 5 dollars total.

(And 1.5. If you commute or have long days, bring food with you. Buy a set of Tupperware with varying sizes (some big enough for salads or soups, some smaller for snacks or sandwiches), and double your recipes so it’s easy to bring leftovers with you to campus every day.)

2. Eat more plant-based meals

Meat and dairy are fucking expensive, and you’ll save money by using less of it or by cutting it out entirely. I’m not talking about buying processed meat-free substitutes because that’s even more expensive. Instead, try using things like grains, beans (dried instead of canned is even cheaper!), or tofu in dishes instead so you can fill up on cheaper food that’s better for you. When you can, substitute frozen produce for fresh to save money too (save the fresh stuff for salads, roasting, or eating raw--those are the only times you can really tell the difference).

3. Stop buying coffee

If you drink coffee daily (I do!), then you should have a coffee machine and make it yourself. A travel mug, real coffee machine (no Keurigs!), and a tub of coffee grounds is way cheaper. At Starbucks/Dunkin/Tim Horton’s you’re paying three dollars a cup for something you could make at home for pennies. Even if you drink lattes/something espresso-based instead of drip coffee, a stovetop espresso maker, milk frother, and a bottle of your favorite syrup works out to be cheaper over time, and you can control exactly what goes into your drink! 

4. Download Honey

Honey is a browser extension that automatically checks for coupon codes/cash back options when you’re shopping online. In my experience, it works everywhere but Amazon (their discount codes tend to be product-specific so the odds are low that you’re buying the exact right thing), but it can net you some pretty major savings with little to no effort.

5. Move the fuck out of your dorm (maybe)

At least at my school, living in a shared dorm room costs literally twice what it costs me to live off campus in a large two-bedroom apartment (my boyfriend and I use the second bedroom as a home office). Also watch out for any school-affiliated apartments that lure you in with amenities like a pool, rec center, or game room--they tend to be even more expensive, and you probably won’t use the extra amenities that often. Do your research, of course, because there are some places with a high cost of living where rent will definitely cost more than the dorms. That said, you’re most likely paying extra for things like cleaning and maintenance when you could easily do that yourself (and not have to share a bathroom with twenty strangers either). Move out, feel like an adult, and thank me later.

6. Take care of the things you have

Even if you’re buying cheaper things instead of investment pieces, if you take care of them they should last a long time and save you money on replacements. All of my furniture is hand-me-downs from IKEA, so when I moved into my current apartment I was extra careful to cover the edges of things made out of cheap particle board and make sure that nothing scratched the paint on my bed frame. Don’t treat anything like it’s disposable--being careless with your things can add up.

7. Thrift stores, dollar stores, and discount grocery stores!

I fucking live for the deals I can find at inexpensive stores like these. Chances are, you have these options near you, but you may not have considered shopping there because your family never did. Keep in mind that just because your parents might be able to afford shopping at Wegman’s or Whole Foods as grown-ass adults, that doesn’t mean your college budget can handle it. Open your mind. Thrift stores are great for clothes (just check for holes, sweat stains, and weird smells and wash before you wear), but they can also have furniture (don’t get anything with fabric, though--stick to all-wooden or metal pieces), kitchen stuff (I got a set of beautiful wine glasses for six dollars one time), or storage containers. Dollar stores are the best place to find cleaning or kitchen supplies, as well as things like Q-tips and cotton balls, paper towels, or little containers to organize with. I would steer clear of the makeup and the food, however. Buy your food at discount grocery stores (like Aldi’s, PriceRite, etc.). While they may not look like the grocery stores you’re used to (at Aldi’s, for instance, they keep the projects in the cardboard cartons they come in to make stocking faster and cheaper), their products are just as good and wayyyy cheaper--I usually pay around $50 for groceries that feed my boyfriend and me for two weeks. If you don’t have a similar store near you, try buying the generic brand of most foods, and sticking to whatever produce is in season--it’ll be cheaper and taste better.

8. Student discounts (obviously)

This is a pretty basic one. I got Microsoft Office for free and a free six months of Amazon Prime (and then a half-priced subscription) with my student email, but you can get discounts at a lot of places. Check this list to see. 

9. Track what you spend and use it to set a budget that includes savings

The biggest thing that made a difference for me was actually seeing what I spent--it was way more than I thought. I hadn’t realized how quickly buying snacks, meals on campus, alcohol, and impulse buys to treat myself could add up. You can use an app like Mint to do this automatically, but I found that using a customized spreadsheet and inputting everything I spent when I spent it kept me the most accountable. I also tracked what category the purchase was (bills/food/entertainment/clothing/etc) and whether it was something I needed or not (groceries and a new pair of basic black heels for mock trial I needed, two new face masks I did not). Once I’d done this for a couple months, I added up all the categories and made a monthly budget for myself, making sure to budget some money for savings and restricting each category some, but not too much. If I didn’t let myself spend some money on makeup, books, or meals out, I’d go crazy--budgeting a small amount for “extra” stuff will keep you on track to save money, but without feeling overly restricted.

10. Credit card points and cash back

If you still use a debit card for everything, get a credit card. Having some kind of credit score is so important for everything from getting approved for loans to renting your own apartment. Just make sure that you’re paying it off on time, not letting a balance roll over from month to month, and not using more than a third of your credit limit at any time. Not only will you build credit, you can also earn cash back or airline points on purchases you’d be making anyway.

11. Take advantage of your school’s perks

I was paying four dollars a day to take the metro to and from campus, which doesn’t sound like much, but it adds up over time (I have classes three days a week this semester, so that’s almost fifty dollars a month at minimum). Recently, I realized that my school has a shuttle that comes once an hour close to my apartment--all I have to do is leave ten minutes earlier every day, and I save fifty dollars a month just by using what my school offers. The same principle applies to things like your school’s gym, free food at events, free coffee or tea on campus, services at your career services office, or even the student health center. It’s included in your (probably way too high) tuition anyway, so you might as well use it and not waste the money!

12. Find dupes

I was obsessed with the trio of serums Glossier released a few months back, but the set cost $65, so I held back. I’m so glad I did, because I found this skincare brand called The Ordinary, which sold serums with basically the same chemical composition for less than $10 each (some for around $5-6). They also come in larger bottles, and I was fucking sold. I’m a sucker for Glossier’s aesthetic, but I’m also broke as hell. If you’re interested in the specific dupes, here are ones similar to Super Bounce, Super Glow, and Super Pure. (ELF’s eyebrow treat and tame is also basically the same as Boy Brow--you’re welcome). So many products in the beauty/skincare realm are marked up simply because of their brand name, and it’s worth looking around for similar things at lower price points--especially when it comes to skincare, if you know the active ingredients in a product it’s easy to find something similar without the gimmicks.

13. Figure out whether you find it harder to spend with cash or card

...and then start carrying that one with you. Most people find it easier to spend on a card than to hand over cash, because you’re limited to the amount you have and you can physically see it leaving your hand. I find it easier to spend cash because I check my bank balance often and I only see card purchases reflected there--for me, it’s easier to hand over cash and forget about a purchase. Figure out which is harder for you to spend on and use that method as often as you can. Leave the other one at home. If you need more limitations, either only bring a certain amount of cash with you or transfer most of your money into savings and keep a low balance in your checking account--you can’t spend more than you make available to yourself.

14. Be prepared to do weird and/or creative things

Ultimately, how you save money depends on what you spend on. I don’t have laundry in my building, and it would cost me six dollars per load to do it across the street (the only laundry machines that are close enough to my building). So, I bought a little $50 hand-crank washing machine and a clothes rack, and I wash my clothes by hand in my bathroom and air-dry them. I also grow things like lettuce and basil in my kitchen windowsill. Be creative, and don’t spend money on things unless you have to.

#studyspo #studyblr #college #saving money #money advice #mine

[aprillikesthings]

Next, in April Liveblogs her Travel Plans:

Ahahah I totally might end up renting from Hertz; they allow debit cards, the hold on my account is only gonna be $200 over whatever the rental fee is, and the rental fees themselves are really reasonable--like, less than $100 for two days as long as I’m willing to taxi/Lyft to and from the rental office in Virginia Beach (it’s twice as expensive to rent it from the airport office or return it there)

HILARIOUSLY, the only sticking point might be my ID, because their list of allowed ID’s includes a Sam’s club or Costco card but not my Social Security card. The utilities at this place aren’t in my name, either. (They take a utility bill as ID but not a w-2 or bank statement?!) Worst case scenario, and this cracks me the fuck up, is me going out to a Costco to get a Costco card; or asking someone to put me on their family membership so I get a card that way. Might be worth the expense, tbh. 

#my life #THIS IS SUCH A HASSLE #OH WELL

[amaintainedrisk]

ugh today was a pain in the ass. I'm back to being frustrated and stressed out by my family and my doctors. first of all, my mother doesn't just mean to me sometimes. She is also just the most immature person on the planet. She wants all the attention on her. to the point where it's just embarrassing and pathetic. Like I said, a few days ago I cut my hair. i've always cut my own hair. Last October I made a drastic change and cut like 6 inches of my hair off. A few days after, I went to the doctor and all the nursing staff and the doctor noticed. And they gave me compliments. They told me it looked really nice and all that, and it made me really happy because I never get complements like that. ever. A few weeks later, I have to go back again. When they let me to the back room I heard the nurse say "oh wow you cut your hair now too?" And I was like…wtf? we covered this last week. obviously because I'm blind, I couldn't see that my mother has now turned around and packed all her hair off into a pixie cut. Really short. and only the nurse noticed. Nobody else said anything to her. as we were driving home she kept complaining and saying things like "only one person said something about my hair. Everyone else said something about yours but no one said anything to me. Why didn't they say something to me like they did to you?" and that's when I realized oh my God, she cut her hair off because she was jealous and she wanted the attention back on her. she's 50 years old, how immature and jealous can you be? I never said anything to her about it because I knew she would deny it so I just let it go. because honestly, it really isn't that big of a deal. It's not worth the fight. Cut two today. I showed you how I cut my hair off a few days ago. My mother saw the day I did it. My hospice nurse was here today and when I came downstairs, I heard her remark to my mother about how nice her hair locks and she asked my mother what she did with it. And my mother said she went to a hair salon and had it curled and dyed. And I'm standing there frozen because I realize she just did it again. I couldn't possibly be a coincidence this time. She saw that I cut my hair and she didn't want me to get attention for it, she wanted it for herself. So she went to a fucking hair salon so she could get the compliments instead of me. I just can't believe how immature she is. How messed up you have to be to be jealous of your own daughter for getting a complement about a haircut? it's just… Pathetic. And it just bothers me that she has to try and take compliments away for me when she knows I never get any answer nobody is ever nice to me. that just really bugs me that she can't even let her daughter have the attention on her for a while. I just froze. I couldn't believe she did that. Twice. She's 50 years old. Grow the fuck up, not everything is about you. I do not know why she does this and I don't know why it bothers me so much. I think it's just because nobody is ever nice to me or give me complements, and the one time they do, she has to get jealous and take that away. I'm never happy anymore so whatever happiness I get, it just bothers me that she's so selfish and immature that she has to take it away and keep it for herself. it is always me me me with her. It's exhausting. I didn't say anything to her because I knew she would deny it and it would just start a fight and like I said, it's not worth fighting over. It's just something that really bothers me and hurts my feelings. and I think the other reason I'm so upset today over that is because she went to a hair salon and paid to get it done. Not even two weeks ago, she was yelling at me and telling me that if she didn't have to buy me food, she could buy herself pants. If I didn't have to eat every day, she could have more than a few pairs of pants. you know how else you can save money? Don't go to the fucking hair salon. Or stop buying packs of cigarettes every day. How about that? Why is it I have to stop eating? It's fucking insane. especially since I only eat once a day if I'm lucky. Not two weeks ago she was yelling at me for eating and wasting money. Where does that money for the hair salon come from then? I wanted so badly to say something but I didn't. it wouldn't of done any good. you can't reason with ignorance or crazy. and speaking of money, my Social Security debit card? I have been asking for that for over a month so I could put it in my wallet. I still haven't gotten it yet. There's always an excuse as to why she hasn't given it to me. It's my money. But when I say that, she starts yelling at me and saying things like "what, you think I'm stealing from you? You think I'm paying the bills wrong? I'm paying the bills, Your bills, with that money. You don't understand how money and bills work. So why do you want that card?" And I tell her I want that fucking car because it's my fucking money and I just want the fucking card. But she won't give it to me. She says I don't need it and so does my grandmother. My grandmother says things like "well you can't drive to the ATM so why do you need that card? Your mother needs it. When you start driving your self to the bank you can have that card." No fucking joke. My grandmother told me, told her blind granddaughter, she could have her bankcard if she overcame blindness or just plain drove to the bank blind. So fucking ignorant and disgusting. And it's coming from a woman who does nothing but pay her own daughters bills and take care of her kids. My aunt Dawn has six kids on welfare, doesn't have her own car and needs to use mine to get to work and drive her kids around, And the job Dawn has now is the first job she's had in 12 years. Not to mention the fact that my grandmother watches her kids all day and has done that since she started having kids. My aunt is 42 years old with six kids on welfare and section 8, can't pay her own bills, and needs my car in order to get to work but you're right grandmother, I'm the immature one. I'm the one that doesn't know what life is like or what life is about. I am the one that's naïve and doesn't know how bills work. Give me a break you fucking ignorant cunt. I am so sick of these people. that's my fucking money and I do more for myself and take better care of myself than anyone in this family but yet they tell me I'm immature because I can't drive to the bank. My grandmother has also told me that if I wanted to fill out forms and applications for apartments, I have to do it myself. why? Because if I want to act like a grown-up I have to be grown-up and grownups fill out their own forms. she keeps telling the fact that I am blind to whether or not I'm not sure and I'm sick of it. Me being blind does not mean I'm immature. I can't drive to the store because I can't see and it's not legally allowed. Same with the bank. Same with forms and filling them out. I'm blind, not immature. FUCK YOU. I have developed an ulcer because of the stress they put on me and the abuse they give me. I've had minor strokes because of it. And now I might have to have part of my stomach removed and that's why I am so frustrated right now. they have been doing this since I was born but now that I know I'm suffering physically because of the stress they put me under, everything they do is hurting even more. That's why I am being so vulgar and insulting about it and calling them ignorant cunts. I know how bad it looks for me to call them that. But they are hurting me so badly. I am so alone. and trapped. And to top it all off, I need to switch pharmacies and for some reason my mother is mad about it. I don't know why. It has nothing to do with her. When I asked why she said it was because she was trying to work with my pharmacy to get all my meds to come do at the same time. And I'm like "… You can do that at any pharmacy. I need another pharmacy because these pills from this pharmacy don't work." And for some reason that pisses her off. I don't know. Fucking hell. i've been trying to get in touch with my social worker but she keeps putting me off. And I know she's busy but I feel so alone and I need away out. and I can only do that through her. I asked to find a support group I could go to, I figured I could meet some people and maybe stay with them? Or they could help me fill out forms or something. I don't know. I looked on my own but I couldn't find anything online. my social worker said she would get back to me next week and that was three weeks ago. I don't want to bug her but I'm desperate here. No matter how hard I scream, it's like nobody hears me. when my hospice nurse came today, she brought the official hospice pastor. Her name is Pat. I met her a few times and honestly I don't like her. she knows I'm an atheist but she keeps praying over me and that feels really violating. And I've told her that. It makes me really uncomfortable as an atheist for her to pray over me like that and she won't stop and it's infuriating. and I know it's because she looks down on me for being an atheist and I know it's also because she's trying to change that and I don't need to change. My thoughts are fine as they are, there's nothing wrong with me not believing in her God. I don't care if she believes in him, I just get sick of her pushing it on me. Monsie believes in God but she has never ever ever tried to change me or push her beliefs on me. all Monsie has done is mention God in passing, in reference to her and what she's going through. Which is perfectly fine. That does not bother me in the slightest. That's because those are her beliefs and her beliefs make her who she is and I wouldn't change who she is for the world. because she's perfect. She doesn't care if I'm an atheist the same way I don't care if she's Christian. we let each other believe what we need to believe, because that's what friends do. We love each other regardless of what our different belief systems are. that's why I love Monsie so much. There isn't a judgemental bone in her body. I respect her and her beliefs and I will do that until the day I die. But this Pat woman is the complete opposite. she keeps judging me and making all these passive aggressive comments like "I know you don't feel well a lot of the times, but I'd like to hear from you more often. Just send a text or something…" and "I know there's never really a convenient time to come over but I would like to. But every time I text you were either busy or sick or something…" and she's trying to play the guilt trip card. Because I don't want to be around her and because I don't invite her over or talk to her or open up to her and that's her job. Well the reason I don't like talking to her is because she judges me. And because she violates my beliefs and makes me feel bad. If she respected my beliefs like Monsie does, It would be a different story. But she doesn't and she keeps doing things that make me very very uncomfortable. When she came over today, it was unannounced. She kind of piggybacked my hospice nurses visit because she knew I would be up then. So she cornered me, basically. And then she wonders why I don't Open up to her. That's why. She makes me feel trapped and cornered and she just makes me feel bad about myself simply because I believe the wrong thing. Wrong according to her. Just. so frustrating. and I'm not even going to get into this, but once again certain people in my family are throwing sc and resa in my face to hurt me again. Just telling me that they aren't my friends anymore because I was never friends with them to begin with. They did not love me as much as I loved them because if they did, it wouldn't have been so easy to let me go. They would've tried harder to stay in contact with me like monsie did. The fact that they didn't means I was on loved. And the reason I didn't know about the twins or her wedding is because she didn't want me there and she didn't care because I was just not worth being friends with. I get this little speech at least once a month and it just really breaks my heart into 1 million pieces. Because I already have that thought in my head about how maybe I was never logged in the first place or maybe I just wasn't worth being friends with and I've been alone this whole time and didn't even realize it. And then my family comes in and magnifies that worry and pain times 10. I really want to get back on Facebook but I'm terrified if I do, no one is going to be there and I'm only going to sign on to realize I was never loved or cared for and they are doing better without me. that they don't need me and I'm just so replaceable to them. That thought terrifies me and it's one of the reasons I'm not back on Facebook yet. I'm afraid of what I will find and my heart is already broken because of my family, I can't take much more. And I'm trying to use the keyboard more before Facebook because Siri is so frustrating. She makes mistakes twice a sentence and it's so upsetting to keep fixing it. By the way, halfway through this note I stopped paying attention so if you see a sentence that makes no sense, I apologize. I quit trying to keep up with Siri because it was making me want to cry. I need to figure this keyboard out before I get back to Facebook. But the reason I'm not in a hurry it's because I'm afraid of what I will find when I get there. My stomach is killing me. I am so stressed out and I just feel so alone and worthless and I feel like I've always been that way, I just didn't realize it. I'm dying and my family wants to make sure I die as alone and unloved as possible. do you have any idea what that does to a person? I don't even know why I'm bothering. This life is not worth it. The pain is unbearable mentally and physically. I miss sc. Do they miss me? Was I worth being friends with? Or is my family right? everything hurts from the moment I wake up to the time I go to sleep. and all this pain is manifesting itself physically in the form of an ulcer and mini strokes. What am I supposed to do? I can't run away and even if I could, I have no one to run to. I'm trapped, I'm alone, and I'm screaming for help. And I'm screaming for love. Why is it that nobody ever hears me? please, I just want someone to hear me.